The Burrowing Bank Robber with Janelle James

Summary

Scam Goddess Podcast Summary

Episode: The Burrowing Bank Robber with Janelle James

Date: April 14, 2020
Host: Laci Mosley
Guest: Janelle James

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Episode Overview

In this episode of Scam Goddess, Laci Mosley welcomes comedian and actress Janelle James (Black Monday, Netflix Special, Black & Mild) for an entertaining and insightful exploration of two major scams: a sophisticated COVID-19 testing scam and the infamous Buenos Aires “Burrowing Bank Robber” heist. The conversation is filled with witty banter, personal reflections on scams and scammers, and an irreverent take on the underworld of fraud—interspersed with the duo’s signature comedic commentary.

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1. Opening Banter & Perspectives on Scams

Timestamps: 00:00–05:15

• Setting the Scene: Laci introduces the “living room content” due to quarantine, pointing out that “the Rona” (COVID-19) has finally made it possible to book busy guests like Janelle.
• Authenticity vs. Excuses: The ease of getting celebrities on podcasts during quarantine, and the societal pressure to be polite about refusing invites in LA vs. New York’s directness.
• On Lying as a Scam:
  • Janelle: “Lying is a scam. Just start saying, ‘I don’t want to.’” (01:51)
  • Laci: “Every nigga is a scam.” (04:07)

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2. COVID-19 Pop-Up Testing Scam – Louisville, KY

Timestamps: 05:15–15:12

• Story Recap: Scammers set up fake COVID-19 drive-thru test sites, charging $240/test, complete with PPE, cones, and makeshift swabs.
• Black Excellence in Scamming: The pride (mixed with dismay) at the sophistication and “Ocean’s Eleven” level operation, showcasing upward mobility in scamming.
• Highlights:
  • “It’s very, bruh. I’m proud of an operation… like, Black people are doing operations now.” — Janelle (07:46)
  • “You know what turns a scam into an operation? These motherfuckers spent money to scam.” — Janelle (08:57)
  • Improvised medical supplies: “Let me get my ear cotton out.” — Laci (10:43)
  • “How do you even start this conversation? ‘Tisha, you always did look like a nurse.’” — Laci (10:13)
• Social Commentary:
  • The scam is outrageous and unethical, especially since it posed a health risk (same gloves for multiple people) and targeted vulnerable populations during a pandemic.
  • The scammers evaded capture for a time, moving locations and outsmarting authorities and journalists.

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3. Historic Hoodwink: The Buenos Aires Bank Heist

Timestamps: 15:32–48:20

• Background:
  • The story of Fernando Araujo, a “free spirit” martial artist and the originator of an audacious 2006 bank heist in Buenos Aires.
  • He teams up with Sebastian, a mechanically inclined friend who once built a helicopter, and gathers a crew of seven.

Key Details of the Heist

• The Plan: Dig a tunnel from storm drains to the bank’s vault, stage a hostage situation, and escape with millions.
• Ocean’s 11 Parallels: Outfits, assigned roles, theatricality, and psychological games meant to deceive law enforcement.
  • “This is straight up Ocean 7.” — Janelle (37:59)
• Comic Detailing: Crew members wore disguises (doctor's coats, suits), glued their fingertips, and released hostages to appear “good guys” on news broadcasts.
  • “They’re literally robbing the bank as the YMCA.” — Laci (35:37)
• Clever Diversions: Used a getaway van, created decoys, and laced the crime scene with bleach and barbershop hair to confuse forensics.

The Downfall

• How They Got Caught: One member’s (Beto’s) wife, Alicia, betrayed the crew.
  • “[Alicia] alerted the cops to his role in the heist and the fact that he was making a run for it with his girlfriend.” — Laci (41:11)
  • “Don’t pillow talk about a bank robbery.” — Laci (41:58)
• Aftermath: Some robbers vanished (notably “Luis the Uruguayan”), others were captured, but the majority of the $20 million haul was never recovered.

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4. Scammer of the Week: K. Goldie / Kayla Massa

Timestamps: 49:39–58:45

• Story: Kayla Massa, a 22-year-old influencer from New Jersey known as “K. Goldie,” allegedly scammed $1.5 million from followers and businesses through Instagram. She targeted mostly teens, encouraging them to “empty their bank accounts” and give her access for fraudulent deposits/withdrawals.
• Social Media & Scamming:
  • “Y’all say Instagram influencers don’t have jobs, but being an Instagram influencer is a profession—professional scammers.” — Laci (50:29)
  • “If you see anybody taking a picture with money…they don’t have money. Because if you need to capture the moment…you don’t.” — Laci (53:29)
  • Janelle reflects on the mundanity of influencer culture: “It’s always just like a chick in a turtleneck, drinking cocoa. I’m like, what’s influential about this?” (51:24)
• Moral: Don’t trust anyone online asking for banking info, no matter how legitimate they seem.

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5. Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Quarantine Booking:
  • “I’m calling everybody up... I’m gonna get them all.” – Laci (00:57)
• On Scam Operations:
  • “Picture this: y’all sitting at home in quarantine... ‘What are y’all doing on Tuesday?’ Like, how do you even start this conversation?” – Laci (09:56)
• On Relationship to Scams:
  • “The only people I feel like I’ve been scammed by is niggas. So—men.” – Janelle (03:58)
• On Guards During Heists:
  • “The guard was like, you know what, I’mma head out.” – Laci (35:29)
• On Outfits in Crime:
  • “The late edition came as a Power Ranger or some shit.” – Janelle (34:00)
• On Scam Team Size:
  • “If your scam can’t fit in a Mini Cooper, it’s too big.” – Janelle (56:11)

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6. Advice & Closing Thoughts

Timestamps: 58:45–end

• Scam Prevention: Don’t give out bank info to social media strangers; flashy online “success stories” are often part of a scam.
• Celebrating Hustle (With Humor): Both hosts note the “maturity” and growth in scam culture, with schemes growing increasingly elaborate (for better or worse).
• Where to Find the Guest:
  • Janelle says she can be found on Twitter (@janellejcomic) and Instagram (@janellejamescomedy), but jokes: “I never want to be found. I’m an anti-celebrity.” (59:32)

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Flow and Tone

The episode maintains a lively, comedic, and irreverent tone, pairing true crime and fraud histories with relatable, often self-deprecating humor. Laci and Janelle mix admiration for the “ingenuity” of elaborate scams with scathing critiques of scammers who prey on vulnerable people. The humor is sharp, satirical, and deeply rooted in Black cultural commentary.

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Key Segment Timestamps

• Opening/Janelle’s Introduction: 00:00–03:00
• COVID Test Scam Story: 05:15–15:12
• Buenos Aires Heist Story Start: 15:32
• Heist Details & Analysis: 17:32–48:20
• Scammer of the Week (Kayla Massa): 49:39–58:45
• Closing/Plugs: 58:45–end

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a witty, engaging breakdown of elaborate frauds and heists, mixing criminal admiration with comic disbelief. Whether discussing pop-up pandemic scams or legendary bank capers, Laci and Janelle keep the “Con-gregation” entertained—and maybe just a bit more fraud-aware.

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As Laci always says: "Stay schemin'—in a major way. Stay healthy!"

Transcript

[A]

Scams C. Robbery and frauds. Scams cos. Robbery and fraud. Scam Goddess. What's poppin, Congregation? It's your girl, Scam Goddess coming to you live from the living room, honey. Yes. We are giving you living room content, baby. And I'm so excited that I could finally get this guest. Cause the Rona got her in the. So she can't be out booked and busy like she normally is. You've seen her on Black Monday. You've seen her Netflix special. You can download her hilarious comedic album called Black and Mild. We have the one, the only, Ms. Janelle James. Hey,

[B]

I'm inside.

[A]

Yeah, I got your ass now. Cause you trapped in your heart, right?

[B]

Oh, God damn.

[A]

I'm calling everybody up. I'm calling all the blacks that everybody. I'm gonna get them all.

[B]

Everybody know I'm not busy. God damn it. The worst time of my life.

[A]

No, listen, it's hard out here. Cause you know, I usually. I usually can get away with like, oh, you know, I wish I could, but you know, I can't. And now everybody know you at your house.

[B]

I mean, you know, this is the time to be real where you just say, I don't like your project. I mean, I'm at the age I don't really do shit I don't want to do anymore. So the fact that I'm doing your podcast tells you I really like you and it.

[A]

So I was hyped. I was very much hyped. I'm not even gonna lie.

[B]

Has not stopped me from turning shit down.

[A]

Okay? I need to get on my grown lady shit because I've been doing everybody, everything. I'm getting scammed down here.

[B]

They'd be like, they know you lying anyway. They know you lying.

[A]

That's true. That's true. Guys, lying is a scam. Just start saying, I don't want to. I don't want to. See, I really wish I could, but unfortunately I don't want to.

[B]

You ain't gotta say that part. Cause you don't really wish you could either. That part ain't true.

[A]

I'm trying. Look, I live in LA now. I'm trying to keep it. You know, LA got that fake vanilla. You gotta make everything sound nice when you being mean.

[B]

You don't have to participate, man, I'm telling you.

[A]

Cause I used to live in New York too. I feel like I ran into you in New York. Yeah. Cause we met in person a few times, but it was very spotty to me. Where. But yeah, living in New York, I Used to love that directness. Like you hop in a cab and you'd be like, hey, don't take Broadway and step on it. I'm late. You know, you can't do that out here in la. I almost got kicked out of a car.

[B]

Yeah, I don't.

[A]

This guy got into the car to go a block up the street. This is back when I was waiting tables and I got in the car and I said, hey, can you step on it? I'm late. And he said, no, Hello.

[B]

Hi.

[A]

You're going half a mile up the street. Get out of my car. And I was like, no, but hello, please take me.

[B]

I mean, I will say, I don't think I've ever said step on it in my life, but that's kind of aggressive. Even my New York State sounds extra.

[A]

I'm a little extra.

[B]

Exactly. That's a real fucking police detective movie line. Step on it. I like it, though.

[A]

Oh, that car.

[B]

Yeah, I'm gonna start saying that post quarantine. That's gonna be my new shit. Step on it.

[A]

You should step on it. You can use it anywhere, anytime, any place. The flavor. No, that's the issue. That's why I left New York. Cause I started acting like I was in a movie. Cause that shit had me stressed.

[B]

Yeah, you too dramatic. People like what's going on, but that's

[A]

exactly what it is. I'm a messy bitch who lives for drama. Okay, so wait, what's your. What's your relationship with scams? You have one. Have you ever been scammed? Do you like scammers? Do you hate them?

[B]

I mean, right off top, the only people I feel like I've been scammed by is niggas. So men.

[A]

Look, every nigga is a scam.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Every nigga is a scam. There.

[B]

But as far as scammers, outside of that, I mean, depending on the scam, most of the time, I'm very impressed. I'm always like, yeah, do that shit. Because

[A]

some people love that.

[B]

It depends on the scam. If it's like, you know, one of my favorites is that white lady that just recently who scammed all those socialites and had them, like, flying her places and paying for her hotels. And I think.

[A]

Anna Delvey. Yes.

[B]

Is it her name? Yeah. Like, I love shit like that. Like, scamming rich people. Fuck it.

[A]

Yeah. She's a queen. She's truly a queen. And it was funny when we did. That was actually the first episode of this podcast. And some people reached out. Cause I made fun of a Girl who got scammed out of $63,000. And they were like, she lost her job. And that was actually very sad. I was like, no, sis, if you have $63,000 to get sc. Scammed with, that's hello, hello.

[B]

That's like. And then not all at once, like incrementally.

[A]

No, she took that all in a hotel. They were at a hotel overseas and Anna was like, oh, actually I don't got the bill. And the bill was 63.

[B]

And the bill was 63,000. Like the fact that your car didn't get declined tells me you are.

[A]

You're right. It's not money money.

[B]

You'll be okay. You have a $63,000 limit on your shit. You'll be good. You'll get it back.

[A]

Well, lately this is the only episode we've done from the living room. And I tried to keep it very much quarantine free so y' all can relax. But there's a scam guys that came across my desk that I have to share with you. So the great people in Louisville, Kentucky, which these look like black people too. So I was like, you know what, I'm not even ma. So Metro council president David James. Relation, we don't know. Is David James your cousin? I don't know. Could be.

[B]

I come from a long line of scammers, right?

[A]

Same, absolute same. My mom had more jobs than a Jamaican. She run a scam since the beginning and I'm proud. So several local advocates have been hunting down a group that they say are fake COVID 19 testers. So far. James said the scammers have set up pop up drive thru test tents at a Wayside Christian Mission Sojourner Church and at Broadway at 17. So they moving, they're moving this scam around. And the leader, James, he says it's really medical fraud and there's no reason that you should have to spend $240 for a COVID test. So these people are doing pop up Covid drive throughs. They are, are not testing anybody legitimately and they're charging $240. And I wish, I wish you could see here, I'll try to like we can bring it up to the screen.

[B]

I first want to say I am just kind of like, like you said, proud that black people seem to be stepping up the level of scam they doing. You know what I mean? Like we're, we're right. This is, this is kind of sophisticated to do a pop up test, right?

[A]

These are trying times. And you know, black people are Stepping up. You are absolutely right on that. Like, very fucked up, but also, like

[B]

kind of ocean 11Y. You know what I mean? Like, it's very bruh. I'm proud of an operation. Like, black people are doing operations now. That's kind of, you know, kudos is all I'm saying.

[A]

Right? We've come a long way from running numbers, you know? Yeah. And now we've come a long way from mixtapes out the trunk.

[B]

Now, the scam itself is awful.

[A]

Yeah, the scam is horrible. I feel very badly for anybody who paid $240 for a COVID test. Fuck Donald Trump. That's why this is happening to us. But I will say they have swabs. They have. Hold on. Janelle, look at your screen right now. And look at. Yeah, scroll down. Look at the fashions. Okay? They are giving me COVID 19 looks. That's what I'm saying.

[B]

This is an operation. Like, Julia Roberts is about to walk by in a big hat kind of operation. Like, this is crazy.

[A]

They got ppe. They got masks, girl. They had cones.

[B]

You know why?

[A]

Social distancing combs.

[B]

You know what turns a scam into an operation? These motherfuckers spent money to scam. They had a right. Spend money to get money. That's the operation they invested. You are scam.

[A]

That's the difference between a scam and operation right there. You may start. You know. Well, that's not true, because sometimes scammers will, like, there's a, you know, on the street scam where they'll be like, hey, I need to cash in this lotto ticket. I have a hundred dollars. Do you have whatever? Like, they a little bit money to take yours. But this is like, y' all have to go to the stor. Y' all had to go on Amazon.

[B]

They had to have a. They had to have a meeting. Like, look, this was going. We gonna do this. You. You over here, you doing swabs. This is how you do swabs. And look, make it like they had.

[A]

They went to the alleyway, because that's where scammers office. That's what we got for scammers, is the alleyway. And they said, all right.

[B]

Multiple people that got Keep a fucking secret. You had to find four other scammers who down with the whole operation. This is crazy. This is crazy.

[A]

Picture this. Y' all sitting at home in quarantine. Like, man, this shit is crazy. But, you know, what are y' all doing on Tuesday? Like, maybe we should. Like, how do you even start this conversation?

[B]

Be able to find three or four equally evil people to run this scam with you is crazy to me.

[A]

It's like, Tisha, you know, you always did look like a nurse.

[B]

Yeah, that's awful.

[A]

And they're swabbing these people, too, so they're in people's mouths, noses sticking around.

[B]

That's awful. That's awful.

[A]

Like, you get there, they got the Q tips from the Q tip box. You like, are you sure? That's what. They don't look medical grade? No, no, no. It is not even medical grade. Not even Q tip.

[B]

They got the CVS brand shit. They got off brand shit ear cottons.

[A]

Hold on, let me get my ear cotton out.

[B]

Oh, my goodness.

[A]

Oh, well, yes, guys, this is fucked up. It's bad. It's super wrong. But am I proud of these people? I'm sorry, guys. I am. I am bad.

[B]

Look like me and we've been watching some programming, huh? We finally bring it up.

[A]

Niggas that watch Grey's Anatomy, and they were like, oh, stat.

[B]

Exactly. Exactly.

[A]

Just out there saying stat and rubbing people's throats with Q tips. I stand.

[B]

How did they get caught?

[A]

So the thing is, is that they haven't gotten completely caught yet.

[B]

Oh, hell. Oh, this is crazy.

[A]

They're getting followed from place to place by journalists, but nobody has, like, arrested.

[B]

This is crazy. I mean, this is definitely last days. Black people running an ongoing scam and have not been caught yet. This is crazy.

[A]

Also, like, where did y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

They got a sign. I was like, did y' all go to FedEx, Kinko's and print this? And nobody batted the eye. Nobody look at you.

[B]

It takes money to make money, yo.

[A]

They probably had a friend who work at FedEx. That's what that was. They're like, well, you know, my cousin work at FedEx, so he'll print out our Covid sign. And then my other cousin Tisha, she work at cvs. She gonna hook us up with the ear swabs. They're like, darren, you look like a doctor. Like, you look like you could be a doctor. So you gonna be the doctor. Like, handing out roles.

[B]

Like, Garrett made it through first year of med school, and he won't let everybody forget about it. But he never truly became a doctor, right? This is his time to shine. If he didn't get Deborah pregnant, he would have made it through med school. But now he drive a bus. But he, like, you know, I did enough that I know what I'm talking about. Yes.

[A]

Okay, but there are some bad details Here, apparently they're using the same gloves on person A that they just used on person B that they all used on person C. That's what James said. He said he believes the group is from Illinois and they are Clay. Damn. So they came through. Girl. They came through town last year claiming to test people's DNA for disease. So this ain't their first rodeo. So they been had the. They have. They have had the systems set up so Corn.

[B]

And they was like, let's.

[A]

This is our time.

[B]

We back out. We gotta

[A]

morphin. Power Rangers. They put. They put all their hands together and it became that one big body.

[B]

I mean, that's the test right there. You want to know if you got Corona or not. You go through that line, by the end, you got Italy for their head all up in your mouth with the old gloves. You got it now you know for sure.

[A]

Yeah. You will know if you have it or not, because we will give it to you. Oh, no. It's a. Like Future said, it's an evil world out there, man.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

When you quote Future and it's a good thing. That's how you know the world is upside down.

[B]

Future somewhere like, God damn, that's fucked up, right?

[A]

Future has a baby mama sorority and is literally the most toxic man alive. And right now he's making a lot of sense.

[B]

Let me tell you something about Future. I have been thinking about many men while I've been in quarantine. And one day I was at a concert. I was performing at Bonnaroo and Future was performing and we got backstage passes and I was like, I don't really fuck with this dude that hard. Like he. He's toxic, he's awful, blah, blah, blah. But I went and we were standing backstage and after the concert was over, Future walk by and this woman behind me, this woman behind me said, future. And he looked at me, sorry. And he looked at me thinking I was the one that said Future. And I just want to say I would have fucked him right there on the stage like, this dude. I totally understand. Previously, you're like, well, how the hell do you get 19 baby mamas and just three second of eye contact with this dude? I'm telling you, he's the devil. But anyway, I will never forget it. And I have revisited it multiple times in my mind while in quarantine. So there we go.

[A]

Legs immediately open. You're like, how did I get here? I'm on my back, I'm on my back. How did I get on my back?

[B]

I would immediately. I don't know if you talk about this stuff on your podcast, but anyway.

[A]

No, we talk about everything.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

Just a little.

[A]

Sensational.

[B]

Yeah, man.

[A]

Sensational as futuristic.

[B]

I totally get it.

[A]

All right, guys, we're gonna take a quick little break. We'll be right back. Scams Hunt. And we are back. And it's time for my favorite segment of this show, Historic Hoodwinks. This is when I'm gonna regale Janelle with a very famous caper and just get her opinions on it. You know what I'm saying? This is called the Great Buenos Aires because. Okay, excuse me. Buenos Aires, Argentina. You know your girl speaks Spanish. Hablaspan, Taoye. Bank heist. So this is an article from GQ by Josh Dean. Shout out to Josh. We don't scam our journalists over here. And paraphrased by Sherrilyn, my research assistant. Hey, girl. All right, so an all star crew created. You know what's crazy is this relates right into what we were just talking about with that Covid scam where they were doing the Ocean's Eleven. Because basically they. This is another heist that started, like, as a couple people and they got a whole group together. So basically it began with Fernando Arajo. He had a crazy idea and he shared it with his friend Sebastian Bolster. The two had grown up together, but they were very different. Arajo was a free spirit. He ate sporadically, slept when he felt like it, and taught martial arts to pay his bills. He studied Eastern philosophy. Okay, free spirit. I've always been very interested by free spirits. Like, is that a scam just so you don't have to take a shower? Like, what that mean? I'm not sure, but I mean, that's

[B]

what they used to call hippies in the 70s. It basically meant, I'm not gonna do what everyone else is doing. Which I guess at that time was getting married and having two kids and a dog.

[A]

Right? So it just means I be fucking. Like, first I'll be fucking.

[B]

I'm out here, I'm out here.

[A]

I belong to the streets is what we say now. But apparently free spirit is what it used to be called. I actually like free spirit better.

[B]

I belong to the streets is what future says.

[A]

Look, we're all gonna have a baby by future.

[B]

Just. Yes, that's him projecting.

[A]

So this guy is a free spirit. And his friend Sebastian was a law abiding family man. He worked mostly at repairing small engines and motorcycles and jet skis. But he was the kind of guy who sketches plans for homes and, I don't know, he home built a helicopter in his spare time. The hell?

[B]

All right, okay, so this is already a psychopath anyway.

[A]

Like, what? You built a helicopter at home, Sebastian, for what? Okay, I understand that, Covid. Now you can build, like, benches for your squirrels outside and shit. You can do whatever. He did this pre corona. So it would be crazy to rob. Okay, so basically, Arako was like, it would be crazy to rob a bank but not leave. And this is what he mentioned to Bolster. He said to disappear through a hole. Arajo might have had his friends mechanical talents in mind when he floated the idea of the bank robbery. So basically he's like, okay, my dude, you built a helicopter from scratch. Can you dig a hole in a bank? Makes sense. That's my natural answer.

[B]

Seem applicable?

[A]

I guess so Araujo's years of contemplation had landed him on this audacious and complicated plan. In 2004, Araujo came to Bolster with concrete plans. So he was like, oh, we was joking about this over wine. Okay, now I got maps. He's like, now I got the map of First National Banks. So we doing this or not? So he said he would arrive and exit using a tunnel. And the suburbs of Buenos Aires had enormous storm tunnels that ran beneath streets and drained to the river. Araujo figured that all he needed to do was find one that could get him near the bank he had in mind and then dig upward.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

So storm drains, I imagine there's probably, like, rats and shit down there.

[B]

First of all, this dude don't get no ass. He got time to be building helicopters. He got time to be digging holes. Who has this much time? I don't understand. What is he doing in the meantime? Oh, he's a free spirit. This is the free spirit?

[A]

Yeah, this is the free spirit. That's exactly why he's a free spirit, because he has time to think about digging holes.

[B]

Eternally free to do other shit.

[A]

To do. Fuck shit. Yes. Now, you know anybody who says they are free spirit, they are also a criminal.

[B]

They down for whatever scam you about to run by.

[A]

Yeah. If you try. If it's time to do crime, go ahead and hit up your free spirit friend. Hit up your friend who never got shoes on. Hit up the Eric of your friend group. Next thing we know, we out in the Rona gear doing swabs like, open your mouth. That looks like a lip gloss applicator. This is legit. This came straight from the hospital why does that say Fenty Beauty? Don't worry about us.

[B]

Throw me a mouth. Rihanna sponsored this testing drive.

[A]

Hey, that's what I would say.

[B]

See, I would be a good scammer. I always.

[A]

Yo, you ain't. See, she donated online. Yes, that was an excellent excuse. And it was quick, too. Janelle, are you out here testing people?

[B]

I mean, you gotta have a couple streams of email. I'm saying Black Monday and COVID testing. That's how we do.

[A]

Look, I'm a serial entrepreneur, okay?

[B]

I love it.

[A]

So he came to him with the legitimate plans. He's like, all right, we're gonna pull up under the bank. So he said that they had the idea to go in during a workday when the alarms weren't a factor, and they decided they were gonna create a diversion. And this is Arajo, obviously, this is his plan because he's a free spirit and he has free time. So he said that they could stage a phony bank robbery. Traditional. Just smash and grab. Then with the entire country focused on that, he quietly drained the boxes in the basement. Okay, so he planned on going into the bank. Here's my question. Are you going walk into the bank, or are you going to dig yourself up under the bank? Aren't you going to be smelling like sewer? And like. Like, we're not going to be like, who is this man who's wet? It smells like Boo Boo. And why is he touching the money?

[B]

I wonder if this is the basis for Inside Man. Have you ever seen that movie?

[A]

Yes. Remember he Steadicam?

[B]

Yeah. I wonder if this is it. Anyway, sorry. Continue.

[A]

It could be. So. No problem. Bolster thought in his shop, he designed a wooden dam to raise the water depth. What? I mean, he then put it apart, could be installed in the storm canal for several nights. He built a dam? Yeah. Neither of them is dating anybody. This is.

[B]

These are super villains.

[A]

So naturally, he figured. And I love them.

[B]

I love them.

[A]

Naturally, he figured that cops would assume that the robbers would exit through the canal's terminus at the river. So he decided a better idea was to flee the other way by going deeper into the canals. This way, they could pop up anywhere in town. So bas. They were like, there is, like an out that goes straight to the river. But we're gonna build a dam, and we're not gonna go out that way because we know the cops. We ahead of them. You know, smart.

[B]

I'm not hearing any. Yeah, I'm not hearing anything bad yet, except two smart motherfuckers is about to rob A bank like this is. This is excellent.

[A]

So they said that they were gonna park a getaway van, you know, whatever, and then they were gonna hide from the police. While the police basically are doing this tense hostage situation, they will have already left through the hole in the bank, tight. So on the day of the robbery, the seven. Seven men. So it was two. And then they went and got seven of their friends.

[B]

Oh, Lord.

[A]

And they went.

[B]

It's too many people.

[A]

They got. Well, they got five of their friends. Yeah. Honestly, too many people. Seven people, a lot. But at the same time, the COVID scammers haven't snitched on each other. And it looks like there's a strong eight of them.

[B]

Somebody gonna fuck up eventually. That's how they all get caught. Too many people, Right?

[A]

The bag will be fumbled.

[B]

Four people back for this scam. Yeah, you're right.

[A]

I think we have to cap it at 4. Honestly, we should cap it at 3. Because we should cap it at 3.

[B]

But I'm trying to be. I know. I'm trying to be nice.

[A]

So some of the gang. Oh, they got the gang involved. Okay, so some of the gang members were. So some of these seven men were gang members.

[B]

Oh, Lord.

[A]

Uh. Oh. And they met for a coffee at a bar. While there, they applied glue to their fingertips, hoping that it would harden so that they wouldn't leave prints. Y' all couldn't just wear gloves? Y'. All. Y' all can wear gloves. Okay.

[B]

That's hard.

[A]

So when they set up. Okay, so it says, then they set off in three, Right? Y' all went to a coffee shop and started scraping off your fingerprints. Like, yeah, let me get a latte and one of those butter knives, please. Y' all couldn't just wear gloves, I guess. So they set off in three vehicle. Vehicles. Excuse me. Pair of cars stolen that morning, headed to the bank. So they basically, they stole some cars real quick before they did so many crimes to get to this crime. The level of investment in other crimes that it took to do this crime is actually pretty astounding. So they stole two cars. They were like, we're gonna go steal two cars right quick. And we got a getaway van that I guess I already had. And then the getaway driver, his name is Julian Zaidia. Oops, sorry, Julian, I can't pronounce your last name. This every letter in the Alphabet. So Julian Z. We don't call you. Cruised to the pickup spot. And then Sebastian worked alone, and he drove separately to Peru beach, parked his car and entered the tunnel around 7 that morning. I love this. Up early in the morning, get yourself some coffee, drive down to the tunnel to do the scam. So first into the bank was Beto, who was dressed as a doctor in a baggy lab coat. Doc who wore a ski mask. It's funny that doc wasn't the doctor. Doc has on a ski mask and Beto is dressed as a doctor. And I don't know why that's funny to me. He can be the doctor. Anyway, Beto pulled out a toy gun he had taken from his nine that morning and flashed it around and told everybody to get on the floor. Damn, you could even go get your own toy gun. You gonna bring your son's gun? Isn't they gonna have your son's prints on it? If I ever walk in the river,

[B]

is it son's prince in the system? That's a whole fucked up family,

[A]

right? That's true. That's true. The Sun's prints probably aren't in the system.

[B]

But I got your seven. We match you to your seven.

[A]

If he got matched to his seven year old, his seven year old probably is doing crime. This feels like the fake tradition. Like if you don't go into crime, like family gonna be mad. You know how like African families be like, you gotta be a doctor. Look, we are criminals. So you get in there and you rob that bank for the family.

[B]

What you talking about?

[A]

School Put all them book learnings down. We rob people in this family. A long line of scammers. I love it. I hope that someone is living that. I guess that's kind of what like mob families are, is like. It's just a long line of scammers of criminals.

[B]

Yes. I love it.

[A]

The flavor, you know what I mean? There's something like that generational crime that's just. It hits different, you know what I mean?

[B]

I come from a whole lot of Corona testers, okay.

[A]

My grandfather, my grandpappy was a Corona tester. His grandpappy was a Corona tester. I just want to be a little bit blank.

[B]

I keep going back to that because I'm truly so impressed that black people have figured out and are accomplishing such a sophisticated scam. This is a new day.

[A]

I just. You love to see it. Cause you know, they always make it seem like that's just white people's bag. Like black people's bag. Exactly. You know what I mean?

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

And little do they know. We can.

[B]

And we out here. We out here.

[A]

Yes, we can. Believe in yourself. Okay? Don't let, don't let Nobody tell you you can't put your mind to it. Okay?

[B]

I want to see some black people still. I want to see some black people stealing art next. Let's get to it.

[A]

Oh, that would be dope. Black people, you steal banks, museums. This is about to be my black. See, this is how far I've gone. Black History Month is. It's gonna be my motivational speech to the children. Let me tell y' all something, okay? Hell, we all related to scammers. We all probably related to George Jefferson or George Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson. And we know he was a scammer.

[B]

We all related to George Jefferson.

[A]

We are also all related to George Jefferson. Guys, I'm in my house, okay?

[B]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I be derailing.

[A]

No, I love it. I love everything that you're doing, Janelle. The flavor, delicious black and mild. Guys, so. So Beto pulls out the toy gun, waves it around like, everybody get on the ground. This is a real gun. And meanwhile, vitae a last minute edition. So this is the seventh member. Why y' all get. See, don't be adding no last minute ads. No last minute ads, guys. So that's the nigga.

[B]

When they was getting dressed, he came out the back like, what y' all doing? He wasn't supposed to be there, but he. Yeah. And they were like, I mean, why

[A]

you ain't telling me your roommate was home, Beto? I thought he was at his girlfriend's house. Damn.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

Yeah, come on.

[B]

We got Rob.

[A]

That's what happened.

[B]

There they was in the living room

[A]

with just, like, a big map spread out on the floor that said, crime. It's a robbery today.

[B]

Come out like, crime.

[A]

I like crime. Why y' all like that? Why y' all tell me? I was doing crime. Ugh. I always get left out of crime. No, I'm coming today. Louis is like, somebody. Little sister, little brother. They were like, all right, get in the car. God. So he was known as Luis the Uruguayan, which I don't know why that's his name, but they don't know his true identity. Okay, Louise, you might have been 10 toes down. So he does sound fine. We got a name that has a D like that. Luis de Ureguayan.

[B]

And no one knows his true identity. That's a hot dude.

[A]

Oh, yeah, he's fine. He's hella. Yeah, you can. Yeah, I like it. The flavor. So they drove one of the stolen cars into a garage under the bank, shut it, and locked the garage door. Then joined their friends upstairs, pretending to Be a part of a frantic robbery that was about to go bad. So Arajo, who's our free spirit, hung back outside in one of the stolen cars. He parked alongside the bank and put his flashers on to create the impression that this was the getaway car. Damn. So they were leading the cops off the scent. Like, basically, he. First of all, Arajo, if you want to get away car, you don't need to put your blinkers on. Hazards on for crime.

[B]

He said, look, we already racked up too many crimes. We can at least.

[A]

At least follow basic traffic laws. At least put my hat. So he the Uber for crime.

[B]

Love it.

[A]

So each man now had a task. So Vite would deal with the cops. There's seven of these dudes, guys. You don't need to know everybody. For real, for real. You know, we got our key players. But so Vite, whoever that is, he dealing with the cops. Luis de Ureguayan. And Beto would subdue the hostages, and doc would do the cleaning. Okay, so what's crazy about this is. Remember earlier I told you that Beto showed up in a doctor's coat? So why is he subduing the people who are being robbed? Aren't you. He's dramatic.

[B]

If I'm doing my first big crime, I don't want to go as myself. I'm like, let me. Let me do some character acting. I have this.

[A]

Like, wait, I have wigs. I have wigs.

[B]

I have a doctor's coat. I have a wig.

[A]

Like, the standard robbery uniform is all black. Why are you wearing a doctor's coat? Maybe he never got to go to med school.

[B]

He's looking for the drama.

[A]

He's like some Covid testers. He's like, I never got to wear these scrubs. I'm gonna wear them today to the robbery.

[B]

Is that. And they, like. It's like cheap Halloween scrubs, too. He's just.

[A]

He came in here in a sexy nurse costume.

[B]

Yes. Everybody get on the floor. Yes. Love it.

[A]

Like, why Beto?

[B]

Why?

[A]

So that's their test. They deal with the hostages, and then doc would go to the cleaning room and activate the final man, Bolster. So Bolster is Sebastian. This is the guy who, like, makes helicopters instead of masturbating. And he's the one who's underground in the tunnels, like, you know, about to climb into the bank. So he needs somebody to let him in from the floor. And so the engineer had been sitting in the dark, waiting patient patiently at the end of the tunnel for somebody to, you know, Let him in. Doc arrived carefully, broke the wall from inside, trying not to leave debris, and greeted the engineer Upstairs, the gang empty drawers Bate sat atop of a counter and stepped into the lead role as the negotiator, a charming man with a fake mustache and a tailored gray suit. So they're all wearing outfits. We got a dog.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Betay was like, I got a suit that I, you know, I only wear to court, but this is my opportunity to wear it on the town. Or you know what? I hope it is.

[B]

The late edition came. The late edition came as, like, a Power Ranger or some shit.

[A]

They were like, take that off.

[B]

Like real people.

[A]

Duh. No, it's morphin time, y'. All. I'm coming. Take that shit off. So they're all in costumes. I love it. Oh, this is delicious. So it was his job to buy the men in the basement the time that they needed to empty the boxes. So this is Vite. He's now talking in a suit. He's luring the police into believing that the standoff they were now engaged in is a result of a botched robbery. So as planned, Vitae released the bank's armed guard and told the police negotiator that this was proof that we are good people. So basically, they were like, we're gonna let the guard walk outside. But the actual motivation to free the guard was that Arajo didn't want a single real gun inside the building. So also, guard, if they released you, bruh, why didn't you leave? Your whole job is to guard the bank.

[B]

Motherfucker was like, this ain't my money.

[A]

See, this is what happened when y' all don't pay. Y' all essential employees, okay? The grocery store employees are essential.

[B]

The postmate, smartest person I've heard thus far. Like, yeah, get the fuck out of here.

[A]

The guard was like, you know what? Actually, I'mma head out.

[B]

It's seven people in there dressed like firemen and shit. Well, the fuck. And he's just one guard. Like, get out of here. It's a fireman, a doctor.

[A]

They're literally robbing the bank as the ymca. Exactly.

[B]

They came in. Who is sticking around for that?

[A]

It's fun to do armed robbery. You know, it's fun to do. Are we really watching them dance, y'? All? Yeah, they have a gun pointed at us. Okay. You know they had a dance number. They had to. Damn, though. I would be pissed as hell if I'm laying on the floor with my hands on my head and I'm watching The guard just skirt. Skirt out of the bank. So they release him. They had a great plan. Everyone is very smart here. So then they released a second and a third hostage too, as a part of Araujo's psychological strategy. See, this is why you don't date nobody who's a free spirit. He's probably so manipulative. This is like future level manipulation.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Next thing you know, you got a baby. Sexy, sexy, sensational. So Araujo wanted the cops to think that he had panicked. Oh, sorry. So the cops. He basically, he's trying to get the cops to believe that the gang is panicked and they know they're surrounded. He wanted to lull the police into the feeling that they were in a position of power. He said, we got to look nervous, we got to look stupid. We got to look like we're losing control. Well, I know y' all look stupid because y' all in these damn costumes. So great. So also, people were watching at home. Must have sympathy for us. So he's like, oh, there's cameras here. You know, people are probably watching and like, oh, these poor guys, they got over their heads. You know what? Arajo is out here creating narrative, and I stand

[B]

the flair.

[A]

Arajo should have been an actor, okay.

[B]

He should have been a screenwriter, because he probably is. He probably is a failed actor. Like, this is how I get onto the tv, right?

[A]

Because he's like, I know there's camera crews out there. He said, I'm coming in my best.

[B]

Luke's right.

[A]

Exactly, sir. This is fantastic, though. So basically, he's drumming up this narrative down in the basement. Bolster worked fast. So that's Sebastian. This is the one who built the helicopters and never has touched his own penis. So Araujo had given them two hours as he started his stopwatch, the minute the DOC punched through the wall to let Bolster in. So we got clocks. Oh, yes. This is theatrics.

[B]

Yeah. This ain't no bullshit. This is straight up Ocean 7. This is Ocean 7 right here. Seven people.

[A]

I feel like they definitely watch it is Ocean 7. I feel like they watched Ocean 11. Was like, we can do that. I love it. You love to see it.

[B]

Sound like they doing it so far.

[A]

So that left Arajo and Doc to finish up around the basement. So basically, there's two hours on the clock. One sprayed bleach, hoping to destroy any remnant DNA, while the other grabbed fistfuls of barbershop hair from a bag and tossed them in order to further stymie investigators. So they were like, the detectives was

[B]

like, oh, someone had a haircut. Why would it just be random clumps of hair?

[A]

Please tell me this is, like one or two pieces of hair, y'. All. Because if y' all went in here and just dumped a bag of barbershop

[B]

hair, I mean, that would stymie. That would stymie. Like, they said, you'd be like, what the fuck happened here?

[A]

So they robbed the bank, but then he also got a shape up. I would be ashamed as a professional police officer if someone robbed a bank on my ass, but also took the time to get a haircut. Like, that's how much free time they had.

[B]

That's how long it took for them motherfuckers to get there.

[A]

Like, there's nail clippings here. It looks like somebody got a full set of acrylics. What happened back here? Like, there's several crossword puzzles that are just completely done. This is a New York Times crossword puzzle. Guys, we gotta step up our police work, okay? These things have been in here for days. Like, they called us and told us a robbery was happening. Like, y', all, we gotta do better. So basically, they do all this, and then they get back in the tunnel, they get on some boats, ride the boats, ditch the boats, climb a ladder into an elevated side channel that led to the getaway van. God damn. They got away with almost $20 million in cash and valuables, and the cops had zero leads. This is beautiful. But obviously they got caught because we have too many details, right?

[B]

We have. Exactly.

[A]

So getting caught five weeks after the heist, Beto de La Torre was out for a drive with his girlfriend when police pulled him over. And he just knew that this was the end. Zo Beto had often been unfaithful to his wife. Oh, damn. So he was in the car with his girlfriend, but he also got a wife.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I mean, he got $20 million. So this was his. So this is Bettero de la Torre. This isn't even the free spirit. That's Arajo.

[B]

Oh, that's a doctor.

[A]

This is the doctor. Yes. That's probably how he got his first girlfriend. He showed up in that same raggedy ass.

[B]

That's what I'm saying. He like, of course I got a wife and a girlfriend. I'm a doctor.

[A]

I'm a doctor. So he often been unfaithful to his wife. And this particular affair had been too much for his wife, Alicia de Turio. Uh, oh.

[B]

Oh, she bout to snitch, he claims

[A]

alerted the cops to his role in the heist and the fact that he was making a run for it with his girlfriend.

[B]

Yup. She like, you trying to leave me, nigga.

[A]

She was like, you finally got money

[B]

and you trying to roll out with some other bitch. No, sir.

[A]

I'll be damned if I see another chick on your arm. Like, she called the cops and was like, he be rocking vanilla coats. I let you go. They were like, ma', am, what are you talking about? This is 91 1. She gonna rock them BBS stones. I let you go. Ma', am.

[B]

Can you please be fucked up with that? Why does his.

[A]

Why does his.

[B]

First of all, he fucked up by even having his wife know his role in a bank robbery. Like, why does she know.

[A]

Don't pillow talk about a bank robbery. You don't need to pillow talk about

[B]

what you do today. Well, you know.

[A]

You know, I was just with the guys. Oh, my God. I cannot get. He was like, nobody wants to let me wear my doctor's coat to the robbery. And it's just really stressing me out.

[B]

Honey, honey, you have a minute?

[A]

What do you think I should say

[B]

to the guys about.

[A]

Like, how can I convince them that I should be able to wear this lab coat to the robbery? Because I really want to. Like, why are you pillow talking about robbery? Don't do that.

[B]

And she like, look, if they don't

[A]

want you to wear your little jacket,

[B]

they not your friends, okay? Right.

[A]

His wife was like, I supported you this whole time. Okay, who got you the doctor's coat?

[B]

Okay. Like a man. Just like a man.

[A]

Just like a man. Just like a man. To be a scam.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

So Beto swears, though, that he wasn't leaving town. But I don't know. I don't know. Your wife said so. The cops. Here's what I will say. Alicia, though. Alicia, don't be a hater, okay? Now, look, there's $20 million out here. Just get you a piece of that and quietly move on. Get you a little gardener lover or get you, you know, find somebody else to be with. But you don't have to rat this man out. This is.

[B]

Did he leave her any money or was he just running off with it? With all of it?

[A]

Oh, see, that's the thing. You're right. Like, if he didn't give her any of the money. And Meryl seems like the type to be controlling.

[B]

Exactly. You can't handle gardening, love, if you ain't got no garden. I'm gonna need some of that money.

[A]

That's true. You first have to Have a garden to then have a garden.

[B]

They greedy. They greedy. They want to bounce with everything. They want to do you wrong and bounce with everything. Fuck that. I'm snitching too.

[A]

Damn. So the cops pursued a tip that Beto and some friends were in the Banco Rio gang. And apparently Alicia was able to ID most of the crew because she'd seen them in her garage working with Beto to prep the getaway van before the job. So Beto's house is where they were. Actually, that's their wework for crime. That was their office space, was the garage.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Alicia gave everybody up. Alicia. I don't know if I. I don't fuck with this. Alicia. Like, you could have gave your man up.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

But you would have to give everybody up. Also. This is a gang.

[B]

Yeah. Kind of dangerous.

[A]

I'm snitch on the gang.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Listen, if a gang does anything to

[B]

me, it sound like they playing that shit in her house and then wasn't trying to break her off. Nothing.

[A]

So that's what it sounds like. She's petty. Alicia, you're a hater. You're a hater, okay? You should have. You should have got your Wonder Woman costume on and got with the gang, okay?

[B]

You know, this dude would have been posted on Instagram from Cozumel and shit with his new braard while Alicia at home still broke.

[A]

You right, about Alicia sitting in the garage.

[B]

Exactly, exactly.

[A]

He and Cozumel. You write about that. Damn. I'm very hurt, though. I'm very hurt. Cause, like, she didn't have to give everybody up like this. She gave up Doc. She gave up Luis. Oh, wait a minute. So Doc and Louise had never come to the house and weren't on the police's radar and were never charged with a crime. So only the people. She only gave up the people who came to Beto's crib. Remember Luis, the Uruguayan? That's that sexy man that we've assumed is sexy.

[B]

Right? He in the wind already here in the wind. He was like, yeah, I was never here. That's what kind of shit he says, right?

[A]

You know, he just walked away and then a bus drove by. And then by the time the bus

[B]

passed, he was gone. Yes. Who was playing him in the movie? Let me think.

[A]

Yeah, who is playing him? It's gotta be somebody real, like, aggressively fire. Ooh, what's that guy's name who was in Moonlight?

[B]

Ooh, Damn it.

[A]

What is his name? I cannot think of?

[B]

Trevonte Rhodes.

[A]

Trevonta Rhodes. He is so aggressively fine. Like, he's so fine. It's like I look at him and I'm afraid.

[B]

I'm not even afraid. I'm, like, mad. Like, how dare you?

[A]

Why? Who told you to look so good?

[B]

Who told you you could do that in front of me?

[A]

Nobody told you you could do that. So. Oh, my God. The fl. Yes. So they got away. Cops arrested Beto Vitae. And Vitae was the one who wore the nice suit and, you know, was doing all the extraness. Bolster was the one who made the airplane in his garage. Julio, because I can't say your last name. And Arajo. And they only recovered a small. Yeah, that's what they pinched. And they only recovered a small fraction of what was stolen. You love to see it. Years later, when Beto was asked where the rest of the money was, he rubbed his head. He rubbed his head and said, you know, when they arrested me, I got a big knock on my head. He says, I can't remember.

[B]

Oh, he got that shit buried. That shit is in the tunnel. Don't they watch movies? It's in the tunnel. And he gonna go through his time, and then he gonna come back and get that shit. That's elementary.

[A]

It's definitely in the tunnel. That's beautiful. I hope they go back in there like that movie Blue Streak and get the money out the tunnel.

[B]

Exactly. I watch so many detective shows, man. I'm on the case. Sherlock James.

[A]

So the engineer got the shortest. Sherlock James. I can't. The engineer. We're going to Buenos Aires to find this money.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Me and you.

[B]

Me and Lacey, we need to go down there and recover this goddamn money.

[A]

This is our new podcast. Janelle James and Lacey Mosley go to Buenos Aires and get the. Find money in a tunnel. So the engineer, Homie Sebastian, he only served 25 months, so he got the shortest sentence. Until last year, he had never publicly admitted his role in the robbery. He was always coy about it. He would say things like, the judge said, I did it. And judges are always right. So I suppose I must have.

[B]

You can't have that kind of swag after the fact unless you know you got that money hidden somewhere. Oh, you know, that's why they.

[A]

So smug. He's smug as hell. This is like OJ Simpson level smuggler.

[B]

Exactly. Did I do it? I don't know.

[A]

That man put out a book saying, I did it. I hate everything. And someone published it. Someone's like, yes, this is great. It's definitely gonna be a hit. No pun intended. Oh, gosh. All right, guys, we'll be back for our last segment after this break of non scam advertising, robbery and fraud. All right, guys. And we're back. And this is the saddest part of the show because this is the end and this is where I'm gonna have to let Janelle go. But before I do, I just want

[B]

to highlight so many things to do

[A]

and people to talk to. I have so many places to leave my house. Yes.

[B]

I'm gonna be out the rest of the night.

[A]

I'm go to the kitchen. I'm gonna go to the closet. I'm gonna hit up the bathroom. You know, I gotta move my.

[B]

Go to the second bathroom. Haven't been in there in a couple days. Haven't looked in there.

[A]

Come on, second bathroom.

[B]

Maybe something changed from the other day. You never know. That's what keeps me.

[A]

You never know. You actually don't. You should go check on it just to see, make a day of it. Put on a different outfit, you know. So scammer of the Week is a 22 year old influencer from New Jersey who is accused of stealing more than a million dollars from her social media followers and local businesses. So this is Kayla Massa, also known as K. Goldie to the 300,000 people who follow her now private Instagram account. She was arrested in New Jersey on February 13th. So according to a complaint on an unsealed New Jersey federal court filing, Massa orchestrated an illegal scheme through which she scammed over 45 of her social media followers, many of whom were under 18 and businesses out of more than $1.5 million.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Y' all say Instagram influencers don't have jobs, but being an Instagram influencer is a pro profession, professional scammers. Like, I recently got into a tussle with she who shall not be named on my podcast ever again because she was robbing people and then had people writing articles about me saying that she didn't rob them people. And she fact checked the articles that says she robbed them people. Okay. I have a photo of her saying, can't I just fact check the New York Times article? It's gonna come out in one or two days.

[B]

You know what? I know exactly you're talking about. And I do want to say, I know it's because I'm not in that age group. But I, whenever I go to these people's pages, I never get it because they always the most basic bitches. And I'm just like, what is influential? First of all, her name is Kayla. Like, get the fuck out of here.

[A]

Like, that is have a better name.

[B]

But I'm not. I'm not a teenager, so I really don't get it. It's always just like a chicken, a turtleneck, like, drinking cocoa. I'm like, what influential about this? I don't get it. But. Yeah.

[A]

Really? I don't know. But it's always that. It's the same kind of girl. And I get Kylie Jenner. It's like. I get that. It's like you have 12, you know, G Wagons. Like, I get why people want to look at your life. But this girl, I'm like, she got plants in her house. Like, is that exciting? Yeah.

[B]

I don't. I don't get it. Yeah.

[A]

But anyway, so what she would do is she. She would encourage individuals from her followers to empty their bank accounts. Wait, what? So basically, she would post photos of stacks of cash on her Instagram stories with messages like, if you got a bank account and you're interested in making legal money, hit me up asap. Guys, making money is hard. And if it's ever really. So it's against the law.

[B]

Yes, exactly.

[A]

If it's too easy, Uncle Sam.

[B]

But again, which makes her really bad is that she's scamming kids, basically. Motherfucker. Just putting a long shift at the Gap and then giving it to fucking Kayla.

[A]

Giving all they Dairy Queen pennies to the girl.

[B]

Exactly, Exactly.

[A]

You just got off your shift at Zara. You really gonna hand over all your turtleneck money?

[B]

You smell like millions of pretzels. And you about to get this bitch. You smell like. Now you don't have to eat Cinnabon 24. 7. Now you gotta get this lady. That's crazy, right?

[A]

Like, how those. What's that story? Is it American Eagle? What was the rich version of it was Abercrombie. That was the one that always smelled like real, real strong cologne.

[B]

Smell like Axe, right?

[A]

You come home smelling like Axe Body spray every day just to give your money to a scammer. It's not right. It's not okay, yeah, fuck you, Kayla.

[B]

I don't like her.

[A]

If you see anybody taking a picture with money, if you see anybody taking a picture with money, y', all, please know that they don't have money. Because if you need to capture the moment that you had some money so that you can remember it, you don't.

[B]

Who the hell got just cash laying around? Is Kayla dealing heroin? I don't understand. She all Breaking Bad. Why you just got cash laying around your shit?

[A]

Yeah, I'm sorry. If you're not stripping, you should not just have. If you're not a bartender or a server or a stripper, which I've done two of those three. You don't need to just have cash that do that.

[B]

No, you take that shit directly to the goddamn deposit. You don't walk around.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You don't take it to the bank. Exactly.

[A]

So basically, she would encourage them to send their banking information, which again, guys, don't send your banking information. And then they would. She would empty their bank accounts before providing their debit card and pin. What? Okay.

[B]

Don't understand what this game is.

[A]

So she would encourage those individuals to empty their bank accounts before giving her the PIN and the debit card. That way they don't have to worry about losing any money. Because she's basically saying, well, you won't empty your bank account, so I'm not gonna take no money out your bank account. And then I would do this. I'm due to very legal thing that we're doing that's gonna give you money that you haven't worked for. So next, she would allegedly deposit large fraudulent checks using the names of real businesses into our followers accounts, then withdraw the cash before the bank could flag it, which this is a scam that we've talked about on this show before, y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

If you get any secret shopper scams where they're like, we want you to be secret shopper for Walmart. All you have to do is deposit this check and then go to Walmart and it's, no, no, they're going to take your money. So they're writing hot checks and they're stealing your money. Please be careful, guys.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

So, yeah, unsurprisingly, it didn't take long for the authorities to catch the scam. And in July 2018, the Postal Service learned that more than 50 blank money orders had been stolen from a New Jersey office, which sparked an investigation that turned up surveillance footage of Kayla and nine alleged accomplices in the store. Too many went to the fraudulent checks. 9. What did we tell y'?

[B]

All?

[A]

9 is way too many.

[B]

They were like,

[A]

if your scam can't fit in a Mini Cooper, it's too big.

[B]

She was like, first, you're gonna drain your bank account. Second, you're gonna work at this money. This money owner place. Go get a job at the Western Union. I will enter. You will give me the. Well, I mean, she certainly. This sounds more like an influencer than what they seem to be doing on the Internet because she's influenced a lot of people to give them her money.

[A]

Yeah, she is an influencer.

[B]

She is an influencer like a motherfucker right now.

[A]

And also, like, I don't. I think the fraud with the, like, the wire fraud is probably what's sending her the most. Because other than that, like, isn't that what Instagram influencers do? They get on Instagram and beg for money? That's what they did. Again, they'd be like, I'll send you this tea that makes you shit if you send me money. Like, they just beg it for money.

[B]

Yeah. I don't get it. Again, like I said, so I don't know what they doing because every time I've even come across one, I'm just like, what the fuck? Why is this interesting? But anyway, I guess, right? Hopefully, hopefully they grow out of it. All these kids that got scammed, maybe they learned a lesson. Don't trust

[A]

in. Just take it on the chin, y', all, because nothing you can do. But yeah, guys, so if any Instagram influencers and also people have tagged me in people doing this currently. Guys, don't send your banking information to anybody on Instagram, okay? I don't care how much money they have held up to their ear, okay? It's not worth it. All right, how do you think this scam even goes around?

[B]

Do they see other How. I don't understand how that would even be a thought to do it. They see another person doing it and it's probably like a telephone kind of scam. They see someone else doing it and then they start doing it.

[A]

Well, sometimes there's nine people that she works with. She's working with a group of nine. She's a small business owner, right? So maybe her other. Now, I do love women startups, okay? I support women small businesses. I do. So I'm sure that other people, because I've seen it before where, like, other people who are connected with the scam will be posting about the money that they receive. And that makes people feel like it's more legitimate. And if she's got nine people that she knows and is working with, that's surely enough people to be tagging on Instagram to where you'd be like, maybe this is operation, man.

[B]

Look, I am so proud of all these scammers we talked about today. That's operation. They ain't doing no small time.

[A]

Everybody's doing big time shit. Big heist.

[B]

Exactly. It's 2020. Fuck all that we out here outfits. Nine people.

[A]

The outfits is truly just still killing me. I love all of y'. All. All of y', all, but. All right, Janelle, all right. This has been fantastic. You are. Yeah. That was fun.

[B]

Thank you so much.

[A]

We always ask, where do you want to be found?

[B]

Where do I want to be found?

[A]

Yes. So, like, where would you like people to find you? We don't ask our scammers where people can find you, just where you want to be found.

[B]

Ah, damn. Now I got. I never want to be found. I'm bad with it, but I. I'm an anti celebrity. I never want people finding me. But you can find me on Twitter. Janellejcomic. You can find me on Instagram. Janellejamescomedy. And, yeah, find me on the Internet talking to everybody, because I'm in quarantine, answering all the DMs and emails and texts.

[A]

Not all the DMs.

[B]

For the first time in my life, I'm responding to everybody. So get up. Get on it while it's hot. Yes.

[A]

All right, guys, you can always find [e-mail] if you want to snitch on your friends and family. I will never use your real name. You can find us @scamgodesspod on Instagram, and you can find me at D I V A L A C I D valacy on all platforms. Congregation, not only do you need to stay scheming scheme in a major way, okay, Stay healthy. Bye, Gab. Goddamn.