The Perfidious Princess with Ron Funches

Summary

Scam Goddess – The Perfidious Princess with Ron Funches

Release Date: January 12, 2021
Host: Laci Mosley
Guest: Ron Funches

Episode Overview

This episode of Scam Goddess welcomes comedian Ron Funches for a gleeful journey through personal scams, listener-submitted frauds, royal hoaxes, and modern-day cons. Laci and Ron swap stories of being both scammer and scammed before dissecting the legendary 19th-century “Princess Caribou” caper—a tale of impersonation, credulity, and British boredom. They close with a look at contemporary retail and PlayStation scams, reflecting on ingenuity and the enduring appeal of the con.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Getting to Know Ron Funches – Scams & Schemes

[03:19]

• Laci introduces Ron Funches, highlighting his comedic chops and past roles.
• Memorable reveal: Ron confesses to being “a bit of all three” (scammer, scammee, and mark).
• Quote:
  “I’ve been scammed. I have scammed. I know. Yeah. I’ve been on both sides of the coin.”
  — Ron Funches [03:39]

Ron’s Early Relationship Scams
[03:56]

• Ron reflects on high school days where a classmate faked affection to get snacks from him, realizing early on that “women will f***ing lie to you and pretend for things.”
• Laci jokes that grown-up romance scams overwhelmingly target women, but “every man is a scam.”
• The pair riff affectionately about the universality of “affection fraud.”

Self-checkout Swaps & Retail Sleights
[07:42]

• Ron recounts exploiting early self-checkout systems:
  “Everything was abracadabra. Like these diapers is broccoli.”
• Discussion of sticker swapping and justifying certain scams as “f*** the man” Robin Hood-ing.

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2. What’s Hot In Fraud — Listener Scam: "My Dumb Ass Employee Got Robbed by Phone"

[09:12]

• Ron helps pick the pseudonym “Chris” for an anonymous listener.
• The story: Assistant manager receives a late-night text—shift manager Jessica claims a family emergency, takes all register cash, later explains it away with an elaborate “corporate” scam (removing cash to “prevent employee theft” under threat of a fake police raid).
• Jessica transfers funds to a Walmart gift card, hands over gift card numbers, and trashes the card.

Analysis & Debate: Inside Job or Dupe?
[13:49]

• Ron’s reaction:
  “She has to be in on it. That’s her boyfriend or drug dealer… she owed him some money. She’s in on it.” [15:53]
• Laci speculates on details, wonders how Jessica wasn’t fired:
  “Jessica must be fine or something… she must know where the bodies are buried.”

Bonus Sidebar
[18:02]

• Listener’s husband shares a tale of a peanut M&M “fundraiser” for the unhoused—initially helpful, later turning into its own money-making scam and eventually, a church in a strip mall.
• Ron: “At that point, it’s a legitimate business.”

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3. Historic Hoodwinks — The Legend of Princess Caribou

[19:03]

• Laci tells the story of Mary Baker, a 19th-century English servant who spent months impersonating “Princess Caribou,” a fictitious Indian Ocean royal abducted by pirates.
• The impersonation included:
  • Invented language (gibberish)
  • Costumes and props (bow and arrow, gong, feathers)
  • Bizarre behaviors (climbing trees to pray, swimming naked, fencing demos)

The Town Is Hoodwinked
[24:38]

• A Portuguese “translator” conveniently appears to legitimize her story.
• Laci and Ron appreciate the creativity:
  “That’s a good way to trick people. I bet you her language wasn’t even real. She was like, skippity, pop it up, uncle.” — Laci [24:41]

The Unraveling
[31:17]

• A former acquaintance, Mrs. Neal, recognizes Mary through newspaper illustrations and exposes the scam.
• Even after exposure, Mary/Baker/Caribou maintains a level of local celebrity, spawning poetry, ballads, and eventually a movie (Princess Caribou, 1994, starring John Lithgow).
• Ron admires the persistence:
  “She did commit to it… I think I would have gave up when they were getting ready to put me in jail.” [35:36]

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4. Scammer of the Week — Retail & PS5 Capers

[40:19]

• New era, new scams: Laci brings up PS5 reselling, botters, and the “middleman” culture emerging in sneaker and gaming drops.
• Ron explains how serious gamers (like himself) use Twitter and pre-orders to beat the bots:
  “You know, there’s places you can go who have the links quicker than others. That’s how I got mine.” [41:09]

French Teenager PS4 Weigh-in Scam
[42:26]

• Story: A French teen buys a PlayStation by weighing its box in the fruit section and ringing it up as a cheap produce item.
• Ron: “This is what I was doing.” [42:51]
• Laci: “Give him a medal. Give him some free games. Okay? He just taught you something about your grocery store.” [43:05]
• The teen is caught returning to repeat the scam at the same store.

Metascam: Ron’s Name Used in Prize Scams
[47:42]

• Ron recounts scammers using his likeness/slightly misspelled name on Facebook for fake $10,000 giveaways, tricking people into sharing information.
• Ron: “First of all, your number one clue is that it doesn’t have my name spelled right. And secondly, I would never give away $10,000.” [48:14]

Photo-Scam Bonus
[47:03]

• Laci mentions PS5 scams where sellers list “a picture of a PS5” (not the console) for full price, tricking inattentive buyers who miss the description.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Every man is a scam.” – Laci Mosley [04:56]
• On Amazon/retail arbitrage:
  “Whenever a gatekeeper pops up… you’re a f***ing scammer.” – Laci [41:49]
• “Everything was abracadabra. Like these diapers is broccoli.” – Ron Funches [07:42]
• “Jessica must be fine or something… How do you not get fired?” – Laci [17:12]
• “She gave fencing demonstrations using a blade stained at the tip with vegetable poison… She often swam naked in a lake.” – Laci (on Princess Caribou) [29:56]
• On being caught:
  “She’s a royalty. She’s been learning swimming and holding her breath technique since birth.” – Ron [29:05]
• “At that point, it’s a legitimate business.” – Ron (on the peanut M&M scam's evolution to a church) [18:32]

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Important Timestamps

• 03:39 – Ron’s definition of himself as scammer, scammee, and mark
• 07:42 – Early self-checkout scam confession
• 09:12 – Listener Letter: “My Dumb Ass Employee Got Robbed by Phone”
• 15:53 – Ron concludes: “She [Jessica] is in on it.”
• 19:03 – Introduction to Princess Caribou caper
• 29:56 – Princess Caribou’s “royal” performances and eccentricities
• 35:36 – Discussion of Mary’s commitment to the scam
• 42:26 – French teenager’s fruit-scanner PlayStation scam
• 47:03 – PS5 photo-scam on eBay/Amazon
• 47:42 – Ron’s identity used in a Facebook scam

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Episode Tone & Style

• Laugh-filled, playful, and unfiltered with lots of riffing and tangents.
• The hosts and guest embrace the absurdity of scams and con artistry, seeing both the humor and the social commentary behind them.
• Attention is always on the human motivations behind scams—desperation, opportunism, or just trying to get by.

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Conclusion

This episode encapsulates the Scam Goddess blend: history, humor, and modern mischief, all filtered through the irreverent perspectives of Laci and Ron. Listeners learn the importance of skepticism, the creativity in survival, and why everyone—from high school snack-hustlers to pirate princesses—might have a little scammer inside. As always, the episode wraps with a call to “Stay scheming!”

Transcript

[A]

Scams C. Robbery and frauds. Scams CA Robbery and fraud. Scam Goddess. What's poppin? Congregation? Have I said, what's pop. Do I say what's poppin every time. Should I switch it up for the girls? Is it getting dry? Hello. Good, good tidings now. Okay, what's poppin? Hi, it's Lacy Moseley. Welcome back to Scam Goddess. We're a podcast that's all about fraud. If you haven't been here before, you're in for a good time, because right now I am. What if you've been here before? You know, I am so excited for our guest today, and I really am. And Disney didn't remember who I was when he came in here, and I have to say that I have to put some shade out there first. But he's a very hilarious comedian. You've seen him all over, but currently you can see him on True tv. Top Secret Radio.

[B]

Okay. I thought I didn't know who you were.

[A]

This show is new. You've already heard his voice. Guys, this is Ron Funches. Okay, correct me, what is the show called? It's now Thursdays top secret videos.

[B]

TruTV Thursdays, 10:30. Myself, Brian Posayn. Ally Colbert.

[A]

Yes. And also I said the name right. Okay, Yeah, I added a question mark to the end, but that was. Cause I didn't have the confidence,

[B]

but. Hi, Lacey. I do remember you didn't wear that hat. You were wearing a much different outfit when I met you.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

That's how I knew you. I knew you as a person that wore fishnet stockings and booty shorts.

[A]

I'm gonna use that the next time I can't remember somebody face. I'm gonna be like, oh, you was wearing a different outfit the last time I saw you. That's why I don't remember you. Cause you had no.

[B]

You had hair extensions. You had hair. Okay, you're right.

[A]

You're right. I had blue and purple hair and it was in pigtail. Oh, see, just describing this outfit. Child. I will. Maybe I'll post this struggle on my Instagram story so y' all can understand. But, yeah, Ron and I met under very fascinating circumstances. It was fun, though.

[B]

It was a good time. It was a good shoe. I felt bad for you wearing that outfit in the middle of the night in a ditch. That seems like the last place you want to be. That seems like, you know, the worst case scenario for an evening at that point.

[A]

You want to know what? It got worse, too. The day after you left the ditch, we had to go back. No, you were there. That was the night I went to the hospital.

[B]

Maybe.

[A]

No, though. Yeah. It was like. They were like, let's get this the scene. And I was, like, getting held up to do the scene. And then I was like, please take me to the hospital. I'm allergic.

[B]

Because you got cold. Oh, you were allergic to being. You were. You're allergic to outside.

[A]

It's coming back to you now. Yes. Cedar trees. I'm allergic to cedar trees. Like, imagine being allergic to a whole tree. A bitch would have never had made it on the Oregon Trail.

[B]

No, you would have died. You would need dysentery. Wouldn't even have gotten to you. The trees take you out.

[A]

They would have been snacking on me like chicken bones. Like, just like snacks on the road. Like, I don't even think that would have.

[B]

You wouldn't have made it past the character creations. You're like, is she a banker? Is she. Oh, no, she dead already.

[A]

They were like, hello. Hello. Like, we just pulled off. Bitch. What's going on? Yeah, I have a weak body. Ron, you're a very hilarious comedian. And I wonder, have you ever been scammed? Do you have a relationship with scams? Do you consider yourself a scammer or a mark? I don't know. You seem very nice. I can't place you where you would be.

[B]

Oh, thank you. Because I'm a bit of all three. Yes. I've been scammed. I've done. I have scammed. I know. Yeah. I've been on both sides of the coin. Of the scam.

[A]

Yes. Do you remember any specific instances or.

[B]

Okay, well, yeah, I remember. Okay, so we'll just start off small, like, growing up. And I just remember there was a lay girl in high school who would always, you know, just show me affection in order for me to buy her snacks out the vending machine. And that was the first time where I really figured out, you know, like, oh, like, she. The women will fucking lie to you and pretend for things to get things. And at that time.

[A]

Hey, Ron, it's so good to see you. I would love to see you next to the Coca Cola machine.

[B]

Yeah, I could sure go for a. Oh, it's so good to see you, honey. And speaking of, I could go for a honey bun right now,

[A]

said Ron. You so hot, Flamin Hot. Yes. Okay. She was playing. She was playing a little bit. But I will tell you that most of the romance scams as adults happen to women.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

They're overwhelmingly majority. That's why if I. I'm just glad

[B]

the tables have turned.

[A]

Oh, wow. Ron, I need you to stop acting like men are not a scam in themselves, okay? Every man is a scam.

[B]

I watch a lot of 90 Day Fiance. I've seen it all the time. I see it all the time. Nigerian scam, just all, you know, that's true for men. Just, you know, scamming with affection all the time. That's true.

[A]

Omo Niger. You know, I love it. I love it. Hello, Miss Old lady that I met on the Internet. I could really use your love and your time. Oh, no, Miss Lady, I know we have been talking for a week. My brother has been shot and I need you to wire me $84,000. They never meet. They never meet. That's. I'm like, what are these Nigerians doing? Like, they must be talking that talk because I'm like, we never met and I'm sending you money. That's wild.

[B]

That is crazy. But they, you know, they got a. They know a type, they pick a type, they pick a. You know, they see how many cats they see in a profile picture and

[A]

then they zoom in to count the cats

[B]

and they go from there. Let's see, I've been scammed. Someone tried to. They sold me a bunch of hash that they like. It seemed like they were going to. Okay, I guess I should explain this story.

[A]

Yeah, I was like, I feel like you started in the middle, which is great for film.

[B]

I was getting ready, as in maybe 18, 19. I was going to move out of my parents place and move in with my friend. And so we're like consolidating stuff and getting rid of stuff. And then he just out of the blue brings over two people in my house who are like, I wanna sell this brick of hash. And they come into my house and they're just like looking around my place looking like, you know, I know when people are casing a place, right? They're just looking around to see what's of value. So I'm like, oh, if I don't sell them something for this hash, they're just gonna take some shit. So. So I end up think I traded in my Nintendo gamecube for brick. A very low quality hash. And for two weeks I was a very poor hash salesman around my area. No one wanted to buy it from me. I ended up just mostly smoking it all myself. So that was a poor decision. But I tell you, my greatest scams of all that I personally got away with were just that time period when the self Checkout lines were new and they weren't weighing everything. And you can just turn, you could just. Everything was abracadabra. Like these diapers is broccoli. This, you know,

[A]

and we've talked about that scam and even though you can't do that anymore with the weighing option, there's still people out there swapping stickers. If the sticker ain't on the like made in the cardboard, they're swapping them out. That Similac is turning into a pack of gum.

[B]

No, please. If you need it, then you, I mean that's where everything with these scams. And I think one thing I like about scams is usually because of necessity and it shows someone's, it can show someone's ingenuity and how smart they truly are to get over on things. I mean that's, I mean I'm a big fan of pro wrestling and that's just all a scam.

[A]

It truly is all a scam. Oh man. Okay, so I like where, I like where you stand, Ron. You lean on the scammer side and that's why I am too. But I am like kind of like if it's fucked up, then I'm like, okay, well fuck that guy. But I mean, I mean as long as you're scamming daddy government or daddy corporation, then fuck them. Guys. Okay. So guys, let's get into it. Our first segment, what's hot in fraud? So this is where we warn our listeners about what's poppin on the fraud front. Front lines of fraud on the fraud front. More at 11. I am now a news anchor or we get a listener letter from you guys. And lately that's what we've been doing is just listener letters. So if you have some tea on scams, if you want to snitch on your friends and family, scam got us pot. Gmail.com. just make sure your scam is ret. We don't wanna fuck up your bag. So today, Ron, I need a name for this person. An anonymous name. Okay, let's do. I think this person identifies as female.

[B]

Okay. Chris.

[A]

I love it. Chris. Is Chris back? Cause I haven't been seeing that many Chrises no more.

[B]

No, my wife's name's Christina and a friend of mine calls her Chris and she hates it, but that's about it.

[A]

She said my name is Christina. Okay, pronounce it all. So I do have to read the subject line of this because it made me laugh. The subject line of Chris's email is my dumb ass employee Got robbed by phone. I was like, okay, so it's a. So I just started listening to your podcast. I'm not sure if you cover scam like this. Okay, I'm gonna skip all that. So this will happen. I was the assistant manager at a fast food restaurant. Around 11pm, I get a text from one of the three underage workers that was working there with shift manager. Let's call her Jessica. That's the shift manager's name. They were asking if I know what's going on. Come to find out, Jessica had told them that she had a family emergency and just left them taking all the money out of the register with her. What?

[B]

That's classic. That's classic. That's mean. There's no reason to even look into that. That's just normal procedure. Everyone knows if you work in a place and you have family emergency, you are allowed to just empty the register,

[A]

take all the money out the register,

[B]

go along your day.

[A]

I never heard no shit like this before. Just like, bitch, I gotta go. Give me all the petty cash. My mama got a flat tire. Y' all popped a register open. What? Like, the audacity. I kind of just love that. For the audacity alone, I'm like, I'm gonna take all the money. Okay. So Chris says, I called Jessica and she said that she was on her way to Walmart, but that she couldn't tell me anything. So I thought you had an emergency. Jessica, there's an emergency at the Walmart.

[B]

Maybe baby need diapers. That's an emergency. Formula emergency.

[A]

See, I don't know. I don't trust it. I feel like this is a PS5 emergency.

[B]

I understand that, too.

[A]

So listen, anything can be an emergency. Guys, you heard it here first. Anything can be an emergency.

[B]

Especially several cookie emergencies.

[A]

When I was working in restaurants, everything was an emergency. I'm like, hey, y', all, I had an emergency. My car got hit by a bus, and I'm just not gonna make it in today.

[B]

Well, I was in my 20s. Just my entire life was an emergency. Everything. Everything was life or death. I didn't know if I was gonna make it through a single day.

[A]

So you're telling me that it's gonna change? Cause I'm in my late 20s, and I truly feel like every. I'm gonna die every day.

[B]

I think it mellows out. And you get into your 30s. It does.

[A]

Okay, this is good to know there's something to look forward to, because 2020 this bitch. I had nothing to look forward to. Almost like another Day in my house. All right, so. So she got an emergency. She got to go to Wally World. Okay. I heard a man in the background ask who she was talking to. And when she said it's my boss, he yelled at her to hang up. About 20 minutes after I got to the restaurant, Jessica came in and said so they told me not to tell anyone, but I'm going to tell you guys. So someone in corporate called and said that someone in the store had been stealing. They said that they've been watching it for weeks and the police know and they're going to show up tomorrow morning and arrest the person in a raid. They want me to get all of the cash out of the building so that person couldn't steal anymore. Hello, this is the FB and the I.

[B]

This seems like a real methamphetamines produced plan. When the lies get that elaborate, that it involves like the cops and the FBI and that I'm the only one who they let in on this. But I'm gonna let you in on a secret that seemed. That's very. I mean, I grew. I live in Oregon. Yeah, no, that's not. That's not bizarre at all. That's very typical methamphetamine behavior.

[A]

And I'm also like, did they call the store or. Yeah. Cause this is someone from corporate cult. So they were just like any. Anybody who picks up, hey, you're the chosen one. We gonna have a raid. But we like you. What's your name? We Jessica. We like you, Jessica.

[B]

So listen, we know it's not you.

[A]

We know it's not you. Since you picked up the phone, you sound trustworthy. So just get all the money out the store for us. Like what? Jessica is stupid. I'm sorry, I don't want to call. Listen, I follow for scams and I've been dumb before, okay? But this sounds like Jessica.

[B]

Wait, you think Jessica's falling for this scam or you think Jessica is in. I think Jessica's the scammer.

[A]

You think she catching?

[B]

Okay, let's see.

[A]

Because she did say she was in the car. Somebody was like, hang up. Okay, well then maybe Jessica is giving the meth story because it is giving. It's giving Tyrone Biggums. You know, he's Tyrone. I'm not watching Dear Chappelle right now because he told me not to. All right? So they wanted me to get all of the cash out of the building so that that person couldn't steal any. That's where we were. I'm catching you guys back up. So I told her she'd just been robbed and it took some convincing but finally she told the police the who thing. She went in on it. The reason I could hear the person when I called was because they wanted her to stay on the phone for the entirety of the scam. So she gave them one of the employees phone numbers to call her back at and then she took his personal phone. What? I am confusion. So no idea why she didn't just give her like give her number to this man. She went to Walmart and counted out about sixteen hundred dollars to on a Walmart gift card and then threw the gift card in the trash after giving the numbers off of it. Luckily the safe won't open after 10pm or her ass would have wiped that out too. The employee whose phone she used had to change his number after the scammer started using it to run other scams, other places. She still has her job and even tried to get my position after I quit.

[B]

I think she is in on it. I think she was in on it.

[A]

She has to be in on it.

[B]

She has to be.

[A]

Also like what restaurant is this that you let your I bitch. If it's a dime missing from the damn register they be like put the dime back or you're fired. Get your black ass out of here. Like I have never been in a place that would let you take all the money out of the register and

[B]

just walk away with it for a bit.

[A]

Also never brought it back. She went and bought Walmart gift cards from Wally World.

[B]

That's the word. That's the part. Because to me like get the money out of the business. Get the money out of the business already. Not, it's crazy. Not, not believable. However, if we're going to go with the route that they wanted to keep the money safe, why are they making Walmart get why they're like, you know what? Actually I was going to get, I was going to get some stuff there anyway with it. So just turn it into. No, she's in on it. That's her boyfriend or drug dealer or something of that nature and she owed him a favor, owe him some money. She's in on it. I'm glad that she kept her job though. I'm glad that she pulled that off.

[A]

That's pretty cool guys, I want to know what you guys think. Let me know if you guys think that he's in on it or she's in on it. I don't know Ron, because the thing that's weird to me is like what's the phone situation? So they called McDonald's just. Or whatever restaurant she picked up randomly. Right? Hey, is someone from. Or is she making this whole up and nobody had ever called? Because it does sound. It don't even track for a gifting scam.

[B]

All right? Nobody calling randomly. She knew she was gonna pick up, and so she could.

[A]

She was waiting by the phone the whole time. They're like, jessica, we need you on fries. She was like, I'm gonna flip it from right here. While I'm holding the phone, I got

[B]

a call coming through.

[A]

Okay, I don't know. I am confusion on this one, but all I know is whoever owns this restaurant, Jessica must be fine or something. Like, she gotta have some kind of leverage. She must know where the bodies are buried. How do you not get fired after taking all the money out the register?

[B]

One thing. If she just worked the fries and she was new there, but she was assistant manager. She knows procedures there. She done made money drops before she.

[A]

She know the protocol. Take all the money out the drawer

[B]

when you need it and make a Walmart gift card. Classic. End of the night, every night. That's what they do.

[A]

You gotta keep the money safe. Okay? The girls will steal if you get a Walmart gift card. How could they steal from you? Okay, this has all been an advertisement for Walmart. What if I sold out that hard?

[B]

I was working those up.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

No. Check out line.

[A]

Oh, man. And then I will read this last little snippet because it sounds kind of fun. She says, Also, my husband has a sketchy past, and he told me about a man he knew that started selling peanut M and M's for the homeless. Eventually, he started hiring home unhoused people. Really? To go door to door with these M and M's, and it did put them in a house. Oh, okay. This scam grew to epic proportions. And my last husband heard this dude moved to Florida and opened a church in a strip mall.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

An entrepreneur scam. At that point, it's a legitimate business.

[A]

Yeah, it sounds like people got to live in homes, and a lot of people got tasty peanut butter M and M's, which also sponsor the show.

[B]

I like them. I like regular peanut ones, too.

[A]

I. What do you mean regular peanut ones?

[B]

Peanut M and M's? Yeah, Peanut chocolate. The peanut MM.

[A]

I just said peanut MM's. You said regular peanut. What the. What is that? What's the.

[B]

As opposed to peanut butter.

[A]

You know what, Ryan? I'm gonna move.

[B]

I'm gonna move on, okay?

[A]

I know what you mean. Actually, we'll be back after some non scam advertisements. Scams, cons. And we are back. And now it's time for my favorite part of the show, Historic Hoodwinks. Where I will regale Ron with a very famous caper. CR crime or criminal. And he will get his opinions and his thoughts. Sometimes we love the person. Most of the time I love the person. But if they're a bad guy, then they're a bad guy. Or woman or non binary person. Here we go. So Mary Baker was a simple servant in England. Mary Baker was a simple servant in England. But for a few months it.

[B]

I like that yours is bad like mine. Like I. That's why Margaret Thatcher I just did anything English can do.

[A]

Oh, really?

[B]

Not hello, governor. See, it's just not good at all.

[A]

I hope that wasn't a serious attempt.

[B]

It was the best I could do.

[A]

You know what, Ron?

[B]

Where have you been?

[A]

That bean. That bean is good. And hippie. Hippie. I've just been watching the crown. So now I'm like. And I love the crown is scammers, y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

Like the whole royal family is a scam. What the do they do? Nothing. They just live give for free and go on tours and get. You know, they're basically like, like club promoters or like, you know, like, you know, they'll be like, Tuesday at the club, we got Keisha Cole and bottle service. But they'd be like, Thursday at Windsor, we got the Queen, like she gonna be out waving, waving weirdly. That's basically what they do. They go hit the club in Australia. They hit the club. You know, it weirds me out when they go to the sovereign nations that are like black and they're like, the Queen is here. Our Queen. And it's like, don't nobody look like her over here.

[B]

I never understood the fascination with the royal family. I mean, I understand. I mean, I like what you're talking about. But like when people love them so much, they're just all about it. I'm just like, what? What? Why? What are you like?

[A]

Well, that's their stand culture here in America. Anybody can be in the royal family.

[B]

Yeah, but you. I mean, I'm talking about like Americans that still stand. That, you know, that's so weird.

[A]

Oh, well, I mean, look, I'm not in the tabloids, but did I get up at 6am to watch like Harry, like the black princess? Absolutely. Absolutely are kidding me.

[B]

Okay, now

[A]

I was like, I'm a princess too.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That's what I'M talking about.

[B]

Thank you for explaining it to me. No one ever explained it to me.

[A]

Dreams can come true or whatever. Okay. She's 36, divorced, and she's just so bad. Like, how are you going to. Like, Queen Elizabeth could never say no to that bitch. Like, she's. Well, I guess she did, but she's such a bad bitch. It was just very inspiring, you know, cuz, because Harry and what's his face. What's that other name? William. Harry and William. I, like, grew up looking at them and they were like, kind of like the hot kid. Like, people thought they were hot.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yes. People wanted them. Well, it was normal at that age. Because I was like, the same age. No, I'm not the same age. I'm younger than them. Anyway, I'm just saying the girls love, you know, a fairy tale. That's why we. That's why Britain gives them all that free money. But the whole point of the royal family is to, like, never let any scandals happen or let people know too much. Because if people start looking around and they're like, why are we giving you money? The whole thing will fall apart. So, like, keep the past. The castle. They're basically. They're like living statues. They're like, keep the castle old and, and. And basic. Like, don't install no plasmas and keep the gold. You know, we gotta look like a museum. Okay? We're all cousins. Keep marrying your cousins so we can all have that weird shaped face. Okay? That's our job. And I love it. So anyway, Mary Baker, she was a servant in England. But for a few months in 1817, she pretended to be Princess Caribou of Javasu, a princess from an Indian Ocean island who was kidnapped by pirates. Everyone in town believed her, and she was awarded status and fame on April 8th because I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna do that to y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

I thought about it, though. On April 3, 1817, a cobbler, shoemaker, shoe repairer. I know what a cobbler is, Sharon, but thank you.

[B]

I mean, I'm glad they explained it because my favorite cobbler is, you know, the baked peach, a peach mixed berry.

[A]

A peach cobbler that she met in Almondsbury, England. She met her as a disoriented young woman wearing exotic clothes who was speaking in an incomprehensible language. What is exotic clothes? Exactly? Because that sounds like negative. Me. Whenever I hear exotic, I'm like, oh, okay, we got a picture. Hey, picture. Okay, these are the. Can you see that?

[B]

Right? Oh, those are exotic.

[A]

That Is okay. See, I was right to say black. She got on a head scarf. They was like, what, we ain't never seen this?

[B]

Where's your hair at?

[A]

Where's your hair at? I'm weak. Yeah, okay. She was giving drip, though. Like, it's giving a little. It's giving a little drip drop for the 1817, you know, she.

[B]

She.

[A]

She stunting on him a little bit. So the cobbler's wife took this stranger to the overseer of the poor, who placed her in the hands of a local county magistrate, which is a local judge for you guys. Samuel Warall Worall and his American wife Elizabeth could not understand her either. So basically, they just didn't speak her language. And this fascinated everybody. I guess you could.

[B]

It's easier to trick people back then, right?

[A]

Also, like, that's a good way to trick people. Like, I bet you her language wasn't even real. She was like, skippity, pop it up, uncle. Like, what that mean? Girl, you want some corn flake? What that mean? So what they determined because they couldn't understand her language was that she called herself Carabu and she was interested in Chinese imagery and other symbols that were unfamiliar to them. They didn't know what to do. They sent her to the local inn. Eventually, Sam Worall declared that she was a beggar and should be taken to Bristol and tried for vagranc. So a vagrant is one who's not established a resident and wanders idly from place to place with no lawful or visible means for support. Which is, like, wild that they found this woman. They were like, oh, we can't understand her. Oh, all right. I guess we gotta put that bitch in jail. Like, how do we get there?

[B]

How? It still goes to this day, and

[A]

it still goes that way now in Los Angeles, it is less expensive to house people than it is to keep doing the crazy shit that we're doing to unhouse people. In Los Angeles. There's a guest who was on last season. Jamie Loftus. I bet you know Jamie Loftus. Do you know, I'm surprised everyone knows her. No, she actually got with her boyfriend, and they went under a bridge in Los Angeles and they brought dollies and they moved these rocks. That a famous actor. I need to remember that son of a bitch's name. One famous actor. And a lot of people had donated to put rocks under the bridge so that the unhoused people couldn't live there. Can you imagine donating money for rocks?

[B]

No, not for.

[A]

No, that's a scam in Itself. Like how them rocks didn't need a donation. Rocks is just rocks. You can go get rocks outside.

[B]

It's like donating money for a wall.

[A]

I'm mad I didn't get in on that scam. I should have started my build the wall fun. Okay, brick by brick, y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

No, no, no. There will be more wall coming. Wall, Wall loading. Okay? Don't worry. So they was like, we don't throw in jail. So the scam is shortly after a Portuguese sailor who apparently spoke the woman's language in quotes just so happened to pass through Bristol at the time. He was like, hey, are there any bad bitches out here who no one can understand? I just conveniently happened to be here. His name was Manuel. He didn't mind translating the lady's stories for the curious town folk. So I guess they still curious even though they threw her in jail. According to Inessa, the wanderer was no random woman, but actually the Princess Caribou from the island of Javasu in the Indian Ocean. She had been abducted by pirates, but managed to escape Jack Sparrow by jumping off the ship and into the Bristol Channel. Which is how she washed up in Almondsbury, I think. Her name is not Caribou as stated in the papers, but rather that in it's her country. I consider that she comes from the Bay of Caribou on the eastern coast of the Caspian Sea, situated in independent Dargery. She. What the hell?

[B]

Don't.

[A]

None of this makes sense.

[B]

Well thought out, though. It's odd enough so that you're like, I don't know where that is. Whatever, just tell me these words. But she didn't explain it right. Yeah, she had another. Yes, Also.

[A]

Also, like, I love how they were like sprinkle in some oceans that the girls know, but that's it. Like everything else. Was she on the corner of the Caspian Sea? Have y' all been down to Caspian and third? Yeah. Have y' all brought y' all boat down there? No, there's. There's an island over there. Like, what are you talking about? He just threw in some oceans and was like, yeah. So she easily could have come thence by the Persian Gulf or still more by the Black Sea. He just named lots of seas. Persian Gulf, Black Sea, Caspian Sea. So Indian Ocean. So he knows these are places that at the time had not been explored by the colonizers as much. So he was like, yeah, she left the Indian Ocean. That's where she came from. And then how does she wash up on shore?

[B]

How far did she swim She's a royalty. She's been learning swimming and holding her breath technique since birth.

[A]

Right. She swam for three days.

[B]

That's.

[A]

You know, she's royalty. It makes sense. So it's not known if Manuel was working with her or actually believed he understood her gibberish. Wow. After hearing her story, the flattered townspeople began treating her like royalty.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

To keep up with the act, she put on quite the show. She used a bow and arrow, carried a gong on her back, and wore flowers and feathers in her hair. Okay. Gong. Is that royalty?

[B]

That's fine. Well, you can dismiss people with it if you don't like their actual it.

[A]

You think she was taking it off her back and then being, like, dismissed? Oh, that's. Listen, I love a costume, truly. She gave fencing demonstrations using a blade stained at the tip with vegetable poison. Okay. She often swam naked in a lake. I bet you she was a bad. Like, we saw the photo. Like, she.

[B]

She was.

[A]

She was giving the girls everything. Each night before she went to sleep, she would pray to her God, whom she called Alitala. Well, there is an Allah. I don't know about the tala. She said, often from the top of a tree.

[B]

She sounds real cool. I mean, she just sounds like a cool, eccentric person that's fun to hang out with.

[A]

Right. And I'm also like, why would y' all think that this is how royalty behaves? Like, royal people just do nothing and they, you know, give the girls a weird wave and maybe behead some hoes in this time period.

[B]

But. Yeah, but over here. But over there, where she from, this is how they get down.

[A]

Every royal can climb trees. That's what we play. The a la dolla and woogie boogie. So she entertained audiences of foreigners, linguistics, painters, physio, gnomes, craniologists, and vagabonds. I would have loved to. I think I could have been a doctor back then. Cause, like, you even have to have no training.

[B]

You just hold somebody's head.

[A]

Right. I'm a craniologist now. So she acquired exotic clothing, and her portrait was painted and reproduced in local newspapers. Newspapers published stories about Princess Caribou's adventures, bringing in a national acclaim. So the girls, everybody knew about Princess Caribou, and I love this. I wonder where she came from.

[B]

I'd like to see a movie off of this. This would be fun.

[A]

Yeah. A lot of the scams that we do on this show turn into movies. So getting caught. The ruse fell apart in a matter of months. In June, images of Princess Caribou that made the papers attracted the notice of one Ms. Neil, the owner of a lodging house in Bristol. Neil was like, wait a minute, that's Mary ass. She said, ain't no damn princess. She was. Mary was out here scrubbing these floors like three Tuesdays ago. What happened? And that's. You know what, that's a hater. This, this, this lady what your business?

[B]

What was it hurting her?

[A]

What is she doing right? Let Mary have some things, okay? She was living a hard life but Ms. Neil is a hating ass bitch, okay? She was. She put on her Karen wig, she swooped her bangs to the side and she said I wouldn't. This will not stand. She was like, this is Mary Baker, a lodger who would often dance around in a black turban and speak in an invented language. Baker did not have hail from Javasu. There is no Javasuit but rather a town called Witheridge. Sounds British.

[B]

That sounds just as made up

[A]

with Ridge. Sounds British to me because it's kind of dry.

[B]

Yeah, that's true. Wuthering Heights.

[A]

Withering, withering. So there's like witherage. I love that Colin is in the booth today and he's British and I'm just like, yeah, British people suck. I said, what's up with them beans? But British breakfast do be nasty as fuck. Can we agree Colin? Can we agree that shit is nasty? They be like, mm, mm, beans and a blood sausage and for some reason a tomato. Like, what's happening? What's happening?

[B]

I like the tube, like the vibe of the city. I don't understand. I mean I've only been to London once but to me it is. I don't trust any place where they're like. Where I'm like, can I get pot? And they're like, oh, it'd be easier for me to get you cocaine.

[A]

That's very true. She levels to this, listen, I lived in London for three months and I went to a nightclub and at the time I had just had surgery in London. Don't ask me why I had to have surgery in London, child. But my mom was like, you can't go to Spain because I wanted to go to Spain because I speak Spanish. And she was like, I don't know anybody there and you're accident prone. And sure enough I had to have fucking surgery in London until my two uncles came to the hospital and it was the day Amy Winehouse died. And when they rolled me into the or, they were like, if you see Amy and run the other way. I was like, the fuck? It was the Last thing I heard before I went under.

[B]

That's really funny, right?

[A]

So I was still on painkillers from the surgery, but didn't know you can't. You're not supposed to drink with them. So I was just like, this is fine, and was very lit and went to a nightclub and got kicked out at 7 in the morning.

[B]

You got a fun life, though.

[A]

Do you know, in those. Because a lot of London nightclubs, they're unisex in the bathroom. So everyone goes into the same bathroom. And then if you're in the bathroom for too long, because it's like a big nightclub and they're just assuming everyone's, like, dying of drugs, someone will, like, kick the door open. And I was just in there chilling on my phone, and they're like, you have to leave. So it wasn't like I was fighting people in the club. I was just chilling on my damn phone. God damn. But, yeah, so you know British people. We've got your number. So she's really from Witheridge, says Ms. Neal, and had been working as a servant even after Princess Caribou was exposed as a lie. Newspapers continued releasing stories on Baker's life after her exposure and even ran poetry and ballads in her honor.

[B]

Hell, yeah. You can't stop her shine, right?

[A]

Princess Caribou, will you be my boo? Let's have some clotted cream and swim in the stream. I can't.

[B]

I mean, they should have known it wasn't true when her name and the place that she was from rhymed.

[A]

Everything rhymed. Alitala. Caribou from Caribou. Yeah. This is. She didn't even try, and I love it.

[B]

Yeah. She's like, I can't believe. Honestly, I can't believe you guys bought it for this long, right?

[A]

I was a bitch. Was in the tree praying to God, like, come on, y'.

[B]

All. But also, I mean, she did commit to it for that time where they were getting ready. I mean, I think I would have gave up when they were getting ready to put me in jail. I'd have been like, no, no, I'm okay. I got my life together. I'm fine.

[A]

But it did. But her hater friend, Ms. Neal, did say that she spoke in gibberish. So maybe that was something that she always did. And maybe that other guy who pulled up on her just wanted to scam the town. He was like, Yeah, I speak 17 languages. I speak African. I go to Africa all the time, and I speak. Speak African.

[B]

It really tells you. Shows you, you know, it only Takes a couple of people to kind of

[A]

get a scam going.

[B]

Yeah. Convince a bunch of people.

[A]

Also, it's 1817, so, you know, the girls are bored. So, you know, Princess Caribou was. She was the subject of all the parties. They're like.

[B]

They're like, no, we need it to be real.

[A]

We actually have nothing. So we're gonna. We're gonna believe it. Here's a final verse of an ode that was posted in Bristol about Ms. Caribou. Let me see if I can give you an old timey. I admired thy caribou. Such a self possession at command. The by plague great thy illusion grand. I don't know what that of this means. In truth, twas everything but true. Basically they were like, we like this house. She l us. That's the song

[B]

being self delusional. We like her. She was cool. Even though everything about you is fake. That's cool. You cool.

[A]

I mean, I. But, you know, she became like a infamy. Like she turned into the Kardashians afterwards. So then they were like, well, we're still gonna report the girl. Okay. Then she married Kanye west, and she wears shoes that look like teeth. Okay. Embarrassed by Mrs. Worrall confronted Mary. Okay. So embarrassed Mrs. Worall. This is one of the people who originally found girl who put her in jail.

[B]

Why is she embarrassed?

[A]

Cuz she was like. She was the one who had the translator and she was the original person who was like, oh, she's a princess, y'. All. And probably like told everybody in town.

[B]

Okay, okay, okay.

[A]

So now she got egg on her face.

[B]

Got you.

[A]

So she confronted Mary. Okay. Confrontation. She said, we going mori in this. Okay. We about to snatch wigs. So who. So she confronted Mary Baker, who suddenly could speak English.

[B]

Well,

[A]

she came in on Mary chilling in the crib with somebody like, yes, let me tell you what I did to these bitches. Oh, oh, Mrs. Worl. Hey, looky boogie. So she was like, oh, you speak English. So Mrs. Worrall shipped Princess Caribou off to Philadelphia. Wow. In June of 1817. For a short time, the Americans were all too happy to see her her perform part of the fake Foreign princess Baker returned to England in 1842. Wow. She made it from England to the US and back in the 1800s. Wow.

[B]

That's a boat ride.

[A]

That's about them. Boat rides were scary. Like, I'm not. No, no. So Baker returned to England in 1824. She settled down, married, had a kid, and spent most of her life selling leeches to local Hospitals. This one was just a hippie. I like it. So the hoax provided plenty of material that has been made into a script already. See, you said it should have been a movie in 1994. Princess Caribou and a novel based on her life and French comics and a musical.

[B]

Oh, I think I have randomly heard of Princess Caribou things.

[A]

Have you?

[B]

I think so. I feel like I at least heard that name.

[A]

But I know I know a coffee shop. Caribou Coffee. Oh, we've got a picture of Princess Caribou the movie over here. Wait, that one. Who is that white man? We know him. Who is he?

[B]

That John Lith gal?

[A]

Yeah, it's John Lithgow. Yeah, okay, John Lithgow was all up on Princess Caribou. Okay, she was a bad. We'll take it. The animations here are terrible. Guys, I encourage you to look it up, cuz it's bad. All right guys, we'll be back after a break of some non scam advertising robbery and fraud. All right guys. And we're back. And it's all. It's the saddest part because it's the end of the show. But before we go, Ron, I want to talk to you about a scammer of the week and I just need your opinions. I need to know if we like this person. This is a current scam that's happening.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

So I know you guys are real horny for PS5s and the girls told them they like Walmart. Every single store was like, we're gonna make sure they're available. We're not gonna let the bots take all of them from you. We got you. And then they all started dropping their PS5 like registrations like early like you play video games, right Ron?

[B]

Oh yeah, I played my PS5.

[A]

Okay. See Ron is famous. So they just. Mr. PlayStation brought the PS5 to his door.

[B]

No, no, I'm a long term gamer. I've been gaming forever. So I had, I got that pre order. I got both the Xbox and the PS5 because I pre ordered put my money down in August.

[A]

See, so you got lucky then. Because what they said was it's like, oh, we're gonna drop the pre orders and you'll be able to get one. And then everybody was like, we're dropping our pre orders. Now we dropping.

[B]

So you know, it was a shit show. Yeah, it was not, it was, it was not easy to get. But I also, you know, there's a couple shout out to Wario64 on Twitter, as always, you know there's places you can go who have. Who. Who can get you the links quicker than others. So that's how I got mine.

[A]

Okay, see, I'm trying to understand this because it feels like Ivy park to me. I don't game a lot, but, like, Ivy park, like, Beyonce don't want you to have her clothes. Like, she'd be like, here, girls, I'm giving you clothing. But she's also like, you have to work for it. So I could have got very much,

[B]

like, sneaker culture, all. Yeah. All the same stuff. And then people go around, try to flip it for double.

[A]

Right? But that's a scam, too. Whenever a gatekeeper pops up, whenever someone's like, I'm in the middle of something that they don't need to be in the middle of, I'm like, you're a fucking scammer. Like, if a company is selling something and I'm buying it, why you need to be in the middle? That's like, I'm trying to buy socks. And I'm like, I'm the sock middleman. So do you have a bot for these socks or no? Because your feet about to be cold.

[B]

Well, you get the socks, but I'm the elastic guy. If you want them to stay up, you gonna.

[A]

We just selling cloth right now. So I don't know if you just want cloth on your feet, I guess tie them.

[B]

You don't have to put some bread ties around your socks.

[A]

Is either bread ties or you pay Mr. Elastic. Oh, God. So this is about a French teenager, Adele. He was arrested after buying a PlayStation for $10 by weighing it in the first fruit section and paying for £6 of food.

[B]

This is what I was doing.

[A]

Now he waited in the fruit section. This is brilliant. This is brilliant. They don't arrest it. Y' all don't need to arrest this kid. Give him a medal. Give him some free games. Okay. He just taught you something about your grocery store. I don't know.

[B]

Yeah, he introduced a fatal flaw of your security. Security system.

[A]

I mean, now I want to do that for everything. I want to get a bed and go wait in the fruit section and then do self checkout with my bed. So in 29, this happened in 2019. Adele is still young.

[B]

So this is a PS4.

[A]

Yeah. It has to be, because it was 2019. It can't be a PS5. So this is a PS4. And he picked the device up off the shelf and took it to the fruit section.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And weighed it. Right. So then he put a sticker on with a heavily reduced price tag on the expensive console and went to the checkout. Adele told officials that he went on to sell the PlayStation in order to pay for a train ticket to his hometown. He would have gotten away with the whole crime if he had not returned to the same shop the next day to carry out the scam again. Damn, bro, you got too much dip on your chip. If it worked at this one store, you gotta go to a different store. You can't just come back to the same store.

[B]

You got about three days before they start spreading it around, all the district managers and the regional managers. So you gotta hit each individual store. Or to tell you the truth, I mean, clearly he didn't think he was gonna work. So he was like. He freaked. He got excited that it worked and was like, fuck, let's do it again. But if it worked, he needed to do it that same day, either at that store or at other stores, and just hit them all on the same day and move on. I was on his side. I didn't see any problems. The PlayStation, so, like, you know, whatever. But

[A]

that's that PS5 talking. That's that PS5 talking. That exclusive game. Does it feel better playing it, knowing that others can't? Does that give you a thrill of your life?

[B]

It does a little bit feel better. Just. It also. It just feels like you're in a little sea. It's like, to me, I imagine what it was like to be Christian back in the past where you had to fill out half the Jesus fish and just hope somebody else fills in the other half. You're like, I don't want. I might get stoned to death if I tell people what I'm really, really

[A]

about out here, y'. All. It does feel like a secret society would be cool that we should have kept Christ like that. To be quite honest, like, we should still be drawing fish. Cuz it's too loud now and too many people have gotten involved.

[B]

People trying to make money off of it.

[A]

Oh, everybody's trying to make money off Christ. I'm trying to make money off Christ. Like, have you heard the good word? It only cost $10 to know what it is. The Bible's been out, Lacey. I'm like, yeah, yeah, but listen, I got some pages.

[B]

Yeah, you don't want to read. You want to read the whole thing. I could tell you about it. I can give you the Cliff Notes.

[A]

I got Cliff Notes and scripture quotes.

[B]

And then I remember my wife just told me that in Canada, it's a different guy. Did you know that?

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

It's not Cliff? It's not Cliff Notes. In Canada, there's another guy who gives you their notes.

[A]

What, like Bob's? Bob's Thoughts or something? I feel like it's something corny name. Canada always got some corny names for some shit.

[B]

Cole's notes.

[A]

Cole's. Of course, Cole's notes. I prefer Cliff because America first.

[B]

It just feels like it should be Cliff. Like, I don't want to learn Cole. Every Cole in my fucking school is a fucking idiot. I'm not learning nothing from Cole. Cliff does his assignments right.

[A]

Cliff isn't a narc. And that's what I want. I want his notes. I feel like Cliff's notes. Someone stole them. I don't even think Cliff wrote them notes for our consumption. It was like, these are Cliff's notes that I stole from that nigga. And that's why they taste better, you know? Yeah, Cole. I'm like, cole, you was out getting high by the. By the football field. Like, cole don't have no notes.

[B]

He don't got no notes. He's like, oh, now we both got Ds.

[A]

He said, look, I gave him the notes. I didn't tell you.

[B]

We good.

[A]

Oh, man, I love this. Oh, I do want to mention one scam that you guys have been tagging me in since we're on the PS5 thing. Anyway, there was a person on. I want to say it's Amazon or ebay, but he was selling a picture of a PS5, and he wrote in the description, this is for a picture of a PS5. And he wrote, also read the description. So it's like you get the mini description. It's like PS5 read the notes. And then in the notes, it was like, this is a picture. Two people bought it. Yeah, for PS5 prices.

[B]

Harsh scam. Oh, I forgot to even tell you this one before we go. Someone's been using my name in an Internet scam as of late last week.

[A]

That's how you know you can.

[B]

I thought so as well, but someone sent me a screenshot off of Facebook where it was called, like, Ron Funchesses. And I'm not saying it wrong. It was F U, N C H E S F apostrophe.

[A]

He sauced it up.

[B]

Yeah, they put two extra X's, which is, to me, like, for your first red flag.

[A]

It sounds like chips.

[B]

Yeah, I would love to sell those chips. They're like fun Yuns, but more fun. And there's like, some type of prize Pack where they said I was giving out $10,000. And one guy reached out to me because he said, he's like, I gave these people my information. I was like, dude, first of all, your number one clue is that it doesn't have my name spelled wrong. And secondly, I would never give away $10,000.

[A]

You should have known I was stingy. Like, why would you ever think that I would do that?

[B]

Yes, I want $10,000.

[A]

Wait, so they were asking for personal information. They just wanna, like, rob Bunches. What's your bank account?

[B]

Yeah, I guess they said they were kinda good. Were good at writing in my tone. And then I guess the person asked them, like, where the money was coming from, and they said, oh, it's not from my account. I'm doing some work with the movies.

[A]

The movies.

[B]

The movies.

[A]

The movies. Okay. Not a specific movie, just the movies, you know. Yeah, I'm doing some work with Tinseltown. Hollywood. Yeah, Hollywood's paying this $10,000. Ron Funches. Now I just want to call you Ron Funches forever.

[B]

I do that sometimes with my wife because my wife's been more stickler for grammar. So she, you know, she'll be like, it's just funches thing. And I go, no, it's. It's funchuses.

[A]

Honestly, it needs some like. That's seasoning. I like that. That's flavor. We like funches for a little razzle dazzle. Got that brings us to the end of the show. Ron, where do you want to be found?

[B]

You can just find me on Twitter, Instagram, hanging out. Ron Funches. I think my Instagram is just Ron Funch. Please watch my show on TruTV. Top secret videos. It's just me and Brian Fosane and Ally Colbert watching some videos and making fun of them, and then also some actors. And it's a mix and it's fun. And either you'll like the vibe or you won't, but I think you will check it out. And then that's. I mean, I'm all. I've been doing a lot Twitch. If you play video games on Twitch or you like. Sometimes we watch comedy and then also sometimes we watch. We do this thing called Get High Watch Wrestling, where we get high and watch wrestling. So. And that is my account on Twitch is Ron underscore funches.

[A]

Yes. Come on, get high, Watch wrestling. I don't have a twitch. Should I get a twitch and do something on it?

[B]

I feel like if you're interested in those type of things, if you like, I mean, personally I mean, you could put. You could record your podcast. I mean, I do my podcast intro on Twitch as well, so just so that people can watch along.

[A]

Fascinating. Okay, maybe I want to do a Twitch where I just watch the crown, but then I reenact the scenes as they are. Black people.

[B]

You can do that, but I don't think. You can't show the crown. You can.

[A]

Damn. Cause laws and shit, right? Laws and shit. Well, I'mma figure it out. How I'm going to show the crown, but it's going to be me. I just want to be on the ground, but there's no way because there's no black people. So I'm gonna figure it out, though. Well, first, before I give my plugs, guys, people are still tagging me on TikTok and new people who are bootlegging my merch for leg 2020. I just want to say that, first of all, leg 2020, like, we got here. Okay, y', all. We got here. We all got shot in the leg by Joe Biden, and we're limping and we're happy. Okay? But can if y' all gonna steal my merch, do you have to use my voice in the background while you're showing the merch? Like, these niggas got phone cases. I ain't even had no phone cases. I can't knock that hustle. I want a phone case. If you listening. I want a phone case. Okay, but yeah, so y' all can keep stealing my merch, though, because I think it's hilarious.

[B]

Don't.

[A]

For real, but maybe do. All right, guys, as always, you can find us at Scam Goddess Pod on all platforms if you want to find our show and you want to snitch on your friends and your family. Scamgodespot gmail.com if you want to find me and my shenanigans. D I V A L A C I Diva Lacey. On all platforms. Congregation. Stay scheming, Scam Goddess. This has been an Earwolf production in association with Team Coco. Scam Goddess is starring me. Duh. Scam Goddess, AKA Lazy Mosley. Scam Goddess is produced by Chelsea Jacobson and engineered by Marina Baiz with research by Sherrilynn Vera. Stay scheming,