The Perfidious Professor with Langston Kerman

Summary

Scam Goddess: "The Perfidious Professor" with Langston Kerman

Podcast: Scam Goddess
Host: Laci Mosley
Guest: Langston Kerman
Date: October 20, 2020

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Episode Overview

This episode of Scam Goddess dives into the infamous case of Jessica Krug, an academic who fraudulently claimed Black and various Afro-Latinx identities to advance her career—earning her nicknames like "Poser Parks." Host Laci Mosley and comedian Langston Kerman explore Krug’s elaborate deception, tie in their own experiences around race and scams, and riff on everything from social media schemes to historic insurance fraud in Florida. The tone is high-energy, irreverent, and insightful, blending historical deep dives with sharp, relatable humor.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Opening Banter and Guest Introduction

• [00:11–01:21] Laci introduces Langston with playful banter about his name and background, joking about being mistaken for Creole and the idea of “Cajun scams.”
• Langston discusses his mixed-race upbringing, his Black mother, and hosting a podcast about Black conspiracy theories.

Personal Scams & Petty Pullover

• [02:23–05:56]
  • Both hosts reflect on personal brushes with petty childhood scams, including Langston’s fourth grade purse-hiding incident that led to suspension (“Apparently you can’t do that. That’s what the teacher and everyone involved told us.” — Langston, 02:49).
  • Laci calls out someone on TikTok appropriating her podcast merch, blending comedy and real frustration (“I see you, bitch. I see you stealing my merch.” — Laci, 04:45).
  • Both commiserate about becoming scam victims, acknowledging the artistry of scammers while also feeling victimized.

Listener Letter: Twitter/Cash App Scam

• [06:22–24:32]
  • Listener "Nancy Drew" writes in about falling for a Twitter cash giveaway scam: retweeting for a chance to “win” $5,000, only to be asked for an upfront payment for bitcoin verification.
  • Laci breaks down the “despo meter”—the more desperate you are, the more likely you'll get scammed.
  • Langston and Laci roast the scam mechanics, the tell-tale red flags, and the hierarchy of money transfer apps (PayPal at the top for security, Cash App as "for crime").
    • “[Cash App] is for crime. That's what the C stands for.” — Laci, 14:15
    • “Venmo can kick you off. They say, 'Wait, on Mark Zuckerberg's app?' That's crazy...” — Langston, 15:30
  • They joke about haggling with scammers and how Cash App’s refusal to process the payment was the universe intervening.
    • “Cash app, shady ass is like, we don’t trust it. Which means that it’s very, very bad… they mostly turn the other cheek.” — Laci, 17:41
  • The lesson: Desperation clouds judgment and scammers prey on those moments.

Reflections on Gullibility and Self-Awareness

• [18:22–25:06]
  • The conversation pivots to how nobody teaches you how “dumb” you are in school, and how societal pressure to believe in limitless potential can foster misplaced confidence in both scam victimhood and other life choices.

Historic Hoodwinks: Jessica Krug a.k.a. “Poser Parks”

• [28:14–58:16]
  • Jessica Krug Story: Krug, a white Jewish woman, fabricated identities as North African, Black American, and Afro-Latina (Puerto Rican from the Bronx) to further her career as a Black historian at George Washington University.
  • The duo plays and reacts to her infamous city council testimony, marveling at her exaggerated Bronx accent (“She’s just kids boppin’ the Bronx. It’s amazing.” — Langston, 31:07).
  • Discussion of why these identities were accepted: Krug positioned herself as a political ally, making other Black and Brown people less likely to question her.
    • “What they figure out is I’m gonna put myself in a position where I’m aligning with black and brown people. So when they hear my accent...they’re already rooting for me.” — Langston, 32:26
  • Laci and Langston riff on how performative allyship and lax vetting in progressive spaces allow these scams.
  • Detailed breakdown: how Krug’s identity story changed with audience and context—North African to US Black to Afro-Latina; students’ suspicions; how academics and journalists pieced together the truth through public records (obituaries).
  • Discussion on colorism, white women’s fascination with Blackness, and celebrity examples (Kardashians "light-skinnifying").
    • “They’re pretending to be like the type of woman that every white woman is pretending to be right now anyway.” — Laci, 46:14

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I’m every Negro, it’s all in me.” — Laci, 39:20, riffing on Krug’s shape-shifting
• “There's no rule that says that you can't be fake black and apply for jobs in African American studies...” — Langston, 57:04 (Air Bud riff)
• “I want to support the whole fake Black movement, but only if I can be fake white...I need all the privileges.” — Laci, 57:25

Historic Scam: Nub City, Florida (Insurance Scam)

• [59:06–65:56]
  • In mid-1900s Vernon, Florida (renamed “Nub City”), over two-thirds of U.S. loss-of-limb insurance claims originated as townspeople intentionally amputated limbs for insurance payouts.
  • The scams ranged from hunting “accidents” (“I shot my hand while aiming for a hawk”) to shooting off limbs for paltry sums (often $5–10k).
  • Community solidarity: when a documentary maker tried to film, locals ran him off, preserving their code of silence.
    • “They beat the shit out of him with them nubs. ‘We ain’t telling you a goddamn thing here in Nub City.’” — Langston, 64:44
  • Laci and Langston reflect on the desperation that fostered drastic measures, the bleakness of the American economic struggle, and the community pride in pulling off generational fraud.

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Timestamps for Essential Segments

• [01:21] – Guest intro, scam personal history
• [04:45] – Laci’s petty pullover (TikTok merch theft)
• [06:22–24:32] – Listener letter: Cash App Twitter scam
• [28:14–58:16] – Deep dive: Jessica Krug academic identity theft
  • [31:07] – Krug’s city council speech
  • [32:26] – On scammer allyship strategy
  • [36:01] – Adele's Carnival photo, cultural appropriation
  • [39:20] – “I’m every Negro, it’s all in me…”
  • [46:14] – Colorism and celebrity appropriation
• [59:06–65:56] – Historic Scam: Vernon, “Nub City” insurance fraud

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Language, Tone & Delivery

• Comedic, unapologetically Black, and sharply observant.
• Guest and host riff, roast, and joke without holding back.
• Willingness to interrogate identity politics, colorism, and social hierarchies within (and outside) the Black community.
• Relatable and conversational, always coming back to the realities behind the wild stories and maintaining a sense of fun even when critiquing serious or sensitive subjects.

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Final Segment: Plugs & Sign-off

• [66:05–end]
  • Langston plugs his podcast, My Mama Told Me (“The greatest scam of all time. Listen to my podcast…”).
  • Laci plugs her socials and upcoming TV appearance as a “scam expert.”
  • Both invite listener submissions for future scam stories.

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Summary

This Scam Goddess episode is a hilarious, thorough exploration of racial and financial fraud, blending critique, education, and comedy. It highlights the psychological and sociopolitical context of scams—from online cash grifts to deep academic fakery—while never losing sight of the absurd or letting listeners off the hook for the “despo meter” choices anyone might make. If you’re looking for both “True Con” history and sharp pop cultural takes, this episode delivers, with Laci and Langston's rapport carrying even the wildest stories through to insightful takeaways.

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Stay schemin’!

Transcript

[A]

Scams. COD Robbery and fraud. Scams.

[B]

C,

[A]

Robbery and fraud. Scam Goddess. Welcome back, congregation. It's time for another installment of Scam Goddess Pod. It's your girl, Scam Goddess, And I'm here to give y' all the tea on all things robbery. And I'm so super excited we would say it with me, guys. I'm super excited for our guests today. If you've been watching, bless this mess. If you've been watching, insert. Why did I say insecure like that?

[C]

No idea, but I loved it. Say it like that every time. That's so good.

[A]

Well, you've already heard. Now, guys, we have Langston. Langston. How you say your last name? I should have asked this before.

[C]

It's very phonetic. I didn't know straight up and down.

[A]

Come on.

[C]

You know I'm not Creole. Ain't no French in there.

[A]

You hella light skin, so you know, you might have been Creole. I didn't know.

[C]

I wish I was Creole. That should be my scam is just telling people I'm Creole from now on.

[A]

That's. That's funny, because that's going to tie into what we talk about later today. So I think I love to enjoy this.

[C]

Yeah, I love a good Cajun scam. Let's get into it.

[A]

Not occasion. It's like, what is that? That seasoning sauce. That's. It's like, got that little. It's like in a gre. You know what I'm talking about? Every black family has this seasoning salt. It's in a green bottle or not bottle, but like a green container. And it's got a little chef on it. I can't remember what it's called.

[C]

I don't. No, y'.

[A]

All.

[C]

Y' all feel less black than I. I was the day before.

[A]

But that's crazy, because you host a very black podcast.

[C]

I do host a very black podcast that we just talk about conspiracy theory and nonsense rooted in conspiracy theory with black people. It's a great time.

[A]

Yes. Well, wait, so do you have any relationship with scams?

[B]

Huh?

[C]

I. I've been scammed. I have. I have been the recipient of. Of scams. I guess the. The victim of scams, I think is the correct word. I remember. This is. Maybe this is. Yeah, the blood. I was blessed with someone else's scam in my life.

[A]

I like that.

[C]

My. I remember the only scam scam that I think I ever tried to pull was in fourth grade. Me and my friends collectively decided that we were gonna steal a girl's purse in class. We weren't gonna steal it. We were just gonna hide it for the day and then that.

[A]

And hide the money in your pocket.

[C]

We didn't take the money. She. It was fourth grade, so she was broke and she was unemployed.

[A]

Understandable.

[C]

It wasn't a big come up for anybody, but it was. It was just like, oh, shit, we don't like her, so we're going to hide our purse. And then we all got suspended from school because apparently you can't do that. That's what the. The teacher and everyone involved told us.

[A]

Wow, that's so gross. Were y' all black?

[C]

The. The victims? I'm calling myself the victim in this. The. The people who are suspended. Two out of three of us were black, but we stole a white girl's purse, so.

[A]

Oh, you should have known better. What did.

[C]

Where. You know, I'm from the suburbs of Chicago. I was. I was learning blackness as I went. You know what I mean? I got a. I got a white father. He did his best to introduce blackness to me as best he could, but no, I had to learn as I. As I went along.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Okay, so I take it that you have a black mother.

[C]

I have a black mother, yes.

[A]

She. Okay.

[C]

She's been black this whole time. That's great.

[A]

Okay. Yes. You know, there's a joke that it's. I feel like I can say it because enough people have co. Signed it, but of my mixed friends, but they were like, you can always tell when a black girl has a white mama versus when she has a black mama.

[C]

White. White mom syndrome is very much a thing. And I know a few people who, you know, you look at the heroes of America, and quite a few of them suffer from that. Or it's just like they do some cool. But then you see that white mom come out real fast and, hey, no

[A]

shade to white mamas with black children. We not shading y'. All.

[C]

We just said I'm shading you. Okay, well, I consider this a cloak of darkness over you because lots of shade on my end.

[A]

Don't get me in trouble. You know, my listeners are the peloton community. Okay, you gonna get me canceled.

[C]

Okay, I apologize. Enjoy your 30 minute rides this morning and your 30 minute rides this evening. I got you.

[A]

Look, I don't want to be a reductorist headline, okay? I'm trying to keep my life together. So let's. Let's get into it. Actually, hold on. I have to take a petty pullover. I have to pull over one moment for some pettiness this goes out on TikTok. I see you, bitch. I see you stealing my merch. I see you scamming me. She made a video with my audio where she is designing merch for the merch that I have merch for leg 2020. I mean, I don't really see any coins from that. They were donating it to Black Lives Matter, and it's just like there's a whole, you know, whatever. So it's not like you're stealing my money, per se, but don't steal my things, okay? I'm disenfranchised. Okay, what's her name?

[C]

You. How dare you steal her merch.

[A]

This is just a petty moment because it was like. It got, like, 1.2 million views. It's the most viewed video that she's had. People just kept tagging me. And then she turned off the comments, and I was like, so, you know. You know what you doing? And I don't know, I'm. On one hand, I respect you. I with you. On the other hand, I'm mad. I don't know how to feel.

[C]

As a fan of scammers, you have to respect a scammer at work. But on the other hand, you're the victim now, much like me, you have to. You have to weigh in. Are you just receiving this scam or are you truly lacing?

[A]

You're scamming because you weren't the victim. You plan to steal a little white woman's purse?

[C]

Lacey, Lacey, Lacey. I don't. I didn't come here for semantics. I came here to talk about scams. What are we doing?

[A]

I love it. I love it. Well, on that note. On that note, let's get into it. All right, so we've got a listener letter for what's Hot and fraud. And this comes from someone who wants to be named Nancy, AKA Nancy Drew. That's what she named herself. So I was like, okay, Nancy.

[C]

Okay. That's a bold choice. Nancy Drew was a hell of a detective. You coming in hot, right?

[A]

Was Encyclopedia Brown a detective? I never heard of that show, but I saw that reference recently.

[C]

Encyclopedia Brown, I believe, was a detective. It was. I only knew it as books. I think it was, like a series of books about a. A young white man. Young white boy who. Who was gonna do Scooby Doo type detective work on his. Just volunteer work, which I don't trust that any little kid who wants to, like, play cop. You a bad dude. You.

[A]

Right? Like, you're getting in the cop too early. That's just like how they be choking cats, you know, see. Seeing how much they can murder. We saw all this.

[C]

You like the police this much that you want to. You want to pretend? Fuck you, Encyclopedia.

[A]

For free.

[C]

For free.

[A]

For no coins. So Nancy Drew says, I found your podcast completely by accident two weeks ago and some really nice things about the show. I'm only reading the thing about her finding the podcast two weeks ago, because this is the only reason. I'm not going to drag you, Nancy, because if you were a longtime listener, then I would have to really just drag you for this.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

So I'm going to be kinder to you, maybe. I don't know. Langston seems to like to drag people, so we might end up having to just.

[C]

Nancy.

[A]

I want beef Nancy.

[C]

So I'm sorry. I'm sorry as well, because you about to get cussed the fuck out. But go ahead, Lacey. Finished the letter.

[A]

Not cussed out. Anyways, getting straight to the point. I got scammed a few days ago, and I absolutely don't mind if you laugh at my expense. Well, thank you, Nancy. We was going to do it anyway, but thank you. I'm glad you enjoying it. That's what I like to hear. Good sport. She says, I was a damn fool. Come on, girl. She said. Oh. Oh, yeah. This is what she tells the color Nancy. Okay, so this is a Twitter scam that I discovered a few days ago, and I thought I should share this BS with Lacey. I want people to be aware of the gross individuals out there preying on people's desperation during these times. So on the show, we always talk about the despo meter. Yeah, so that's like, if you think something is suspect, but you're like, I don't know, I should try it. It's like this moment where you think about how bad you want it. Like, if you want something real bad, chances are you're more desperate and you're more likely to get scammed. And that goes for everything, you know? I mean, if you lonely, then, yeah. You're gonna let the guy with questionable hygiene and, you know, like, place to live come over to your house and dick you down.

[C]

You know, it's like when you. If you're horny enough and you start getting those tabs that open up when you go on websites, and it's like. It's some. It's some thick Asians near you. Oh, wait a minute. Oh, am I. Am I bold enough to click on this picture of a thick Asian woman who may, in fact, be near me? I got you, Despo. Meter. I've made sense of it.

[A]

You did? It was a very specific reference. We'll take it. But yes, if you are clicking on singles near you Hot horny milfs. Why do I. Why can I rattle off so many of these? I don't. Anyway, we're just not about me, Nancy. So Nancy says that I've been retweeting all of these giveaways and quotes I've seen. Like the one saying giving away $5,000 must be following me. And blah, blah, blah. A few days ago, I had woken up to a message that said, I won. Whoa. Right away I'm like, no way is this real? Now, see, Nancy, you. That could have been. You could have opened your phone, close your phone back, and this would have been over. That's all you had to do was hit the home screen, sis.

[C]

You knew you didn't have to invest further into. You could have walked away, Nancy.

[A]

But I'm glad that you did. So they're literally using a sweet face grandma as the profile pic. I'll attach pics to this. Okay, but the sad little part of my brain. Oh, sorry. But this sad little part of my brain that is just way too trusting and wants to see the best and people was like, hmm, what if. Dude, seriously, fuck that voice in your head. Cause it fucks shit up you. Right, Nancy? It's like you say everything is a scam. Yes. See, so you know I can't drag you because you knew better. So she says, I should have been out here questioning everything. All right, sis, let's get to it. So she says, I messaged. It's a lot of. It's a lot of her turmoil. We gotta let her get it out. Just like I had to fight with who's probably 15 on the podcast. She had to get her shit out.

[C]

But listen, that don't mean you can't get these hands. 15 or not, you could still get fist fought. You give us back Lacey's merch. It's done. Your little scam is over. Continue, please. Tell me more.

[A]

Right, thank you. You lucky. You lucky I got Zoom University right now. Otherwise I'll be pulling up, okay? To a. To a park near you. So here we go. She says, I messaged one of the people and they literally responded in like three or four minutes. Yeah, because it was thirsty. That was another red flag. And she sent me this sketchy ass message saying something about a bitcoin transfer. Some absolute fucking dog shit. Okay, damn, she get mad now, she said. But basically she was telling me that I had to send $50 and receive the payment right away. And some other BS about her paying off her mom's medical bills. I'll send you the screenshot. This shit is unreal. Anyway, so she. So she's supposed to be winning $5,000, right? And then as soon as she gets to the DMs, she's like, okay, hey, give me the coins. And she's like, actually, you know, my auntie broke her leg and she got sciatica and we need $50.

[C]

And that's the thing. I think that. Here's the thing. The government, whenever they give me my tax returns, they never preface it by being like, hey, by the way, we. The government hurt our ankle earlier, so just keep that in mind as you receive this money from us. That doesn't make sense. They're not the. You don't get to tell me about your problems if you're giving me a gift.

[A]

Right, and it's not a gift. It's your own fucking money that they stole for a tax free loan.

[C]

Sure, the government. Anyway, it's the only scammers I believe in. So anyway, I. Right, listen, I don't think the government has. I don't think the government has ever done anything wrong to anybody. I like their work. I feel like the money that they give back to me is a sweet treat that I, I didn't deserve. But thank you, papa government, for. For giving it back to me. And you're goddamn right I'll. I'll work to service you at all times in all ways. Wow.

[A]

Wow. We got a real bootlicker on. I love you, Daddy government. Thank you, Uncle Sam. Anyway, okay, so he says, I'm still suspicious. And yet I'm saying, but what if. Ugh, come on now, girl. Why are you still suspicious? This is beyond suspicion. They told you they were robbing you. They said, hey, we here for robbery. Would you like to sign up?

[C]

We've got a robbery on aisle three, please.

[A]

And right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So she goes, the fuck. I don't have $50 to throw away, but maybe I'll send 10. So she responds saying she would then only be able to send me back 2000 LMFAO. I dead ass went into my Cash app. Oh, you black. I dead ass went into my cash app and sent her $25. And this is where you have the full right to laugh at me. The payment fucking declined. So she went into Cash app, which is the shadiest of all the apps. Cash app is for crime. That's what the C stands For.

[C]

Well, can you break down the hierarchy for me? Because I do agree. I think cash app is the. The lesser of the transfer. Where. Where's the top? Where are we at? In. I'm a Venmo man. I like Venmo. Is that a good one?

[A]

Venmo is in the middle class.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

For sure. I feel like the top is PayPal.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Because, you know, PayPal really, like, it feels like almost like a bank. Like, they'll stop transfers. They'll be like, this was shady PayPal. Be like, we beat this nigga up for you. Like, so they feel like number one in protection is security.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

Then you got Venmo, which is like, you know, colloquial. It's like, hey, send me money for the wine or let's split those apps. You know, that's cute.

[C]

It's your everyday, everyday.

[A]

I got you trustworthy. Then you got cash app, which is definitely for crime. It's where you go and you pay your weed man. But you say like dog walking services or, you know, whatever. Because I feel like Venmo checks on that too much. Because I used to have friends who got kicked off Venmo because they were jokingly like, like Venmo me and be like, for drugs. And then Venmo was like, oh, Venmo

[C]

can kick you off.

[A]

They can kick you off. They say, wait on Mark Zuckerberg's app.

[C]

That's crazy because I'd be sending prostitution to my mom all the time. She'll like, ask me for some money. I'll send her some wild like prostitution. And she. They've never said anything to me. They must know that. That there must be fine with me being a prostitute. I guess that's really.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They must believe that you're running. Listen, ain't no business like hoe business. And you and Venmo respects only fans is Venmo was like, look, we're not sending all of our workers to onlyfans, okay? So if y' all want to get yalls Venmos for these feet pics, y' all go right ahead.

[C]

Listen, drugs, no deal. But prostitution go crazy. We. We know what you're doing. Go ahead.

[A]

Sex work should be legal. So I actually fucked with Venmo for not stopping you for that. So let's go, Venmo. I'm down. Um, but then after that, I think it's Western Union. Cause that's really where you go when you're like, you got to show up in person for the most part. Western Union is time for Crime. You go in there, you know what you're doing. It's seedy.

[C]

Everybody knows there's bulletproof glass. It. It ain't. Ain't nothing good happening in a Western union.

[A]

That ain't anywhere you go where there's bulletproof glass to protect the workers. It's just. I remember there was a KFC like that in Pittsburgh or somewhere where, like, if you went, then you had to, like, open up a drawer.

[C]

Yeah, the old skinny drawer.

[A]

Yeah, the drawer open to the other side, and that's how they sent you your food. And it was like, five inches of bulletproof glass.

[C]

Yeah, that's because five inches of got shot in there, and they needed to. To make up for what had happened in the past. I get it. Good for you. KFC for protecting that. That moist chicken that you keep serving out.

[A]

Oh, gosh. So back to this letter, because we have made a departure. So remember, she tries to haggle. She's like, okay, I can't send you 50. I can send you 10. She's like, okay, bet. Well, if you're not gonna send me 50, I can't send you 500, so I'm gonna send you 2,000. So then she's like, you know what? Okay, I'll up it to 25. What can I get for 25? How much money will you give me for 25? Cause you know how money works. You know? You know how it works.

[C]

What's the ratio here? Hook me up. I'm trying to get paid.

[A]

You know, I bought some money with some other money. I bought $2,000 or $25. So she said she tries to sell the payment, and cash app, shady ass is like, we don't trust it. Which means that it's very, very bad, because cash app is like, we'll let it slide. They're like, oh, this seems shady, but we'll let it go. It's none of our business. They mostly turn the other cheek. So they blocked the payment because it was in a sketchy account, Right? Then I go, Oooh, I have PayPal, too.

[C]

God damn, lady. What are you doing, Nancy Drew? Come on now.

[A]

Nancy said, why the fuck am I like this?

[C]

She said that. Oh, good for her. Okay, she knows, all right.

[A]

She's aware. She's aware. She's like, yeah. So I sent them the money. I ultimately thought, okay, if I lose this $25, I will gain the information I needed to fully understand the scam.

[C]

I love that.

[A]

Tell yourself anything.

[C]

If I pay this person 25, I will learn. I'm Dumb as hell. Officially, I will learn just how goofy I am, and it will be documented for all of time.

[A]

Listen, they don't teach you how dumb you are in school.

[C]

They don't.

[A]

That's a fact.

[C]

That's the problem. They teach us that. That we are more capable than we actually are. They tell us we have all the potential in the world, when in fact they should be like a dog. You don't read as well as you think that you do. And so you should enter every reading situation with less confidence and see where that gets you as a person.

[A]

Like, maybe caution or like, you know, it's not even about being bad. It's just that in America, we're always trying to teach our kids that, like, you can be anything. And it's like, no, I couldn't have been a statistician. Like, I, you know, I can get the basics of numbers. I pass calc somehow, but I couldn't have done that job. I couldn't be a NASA scientist. No, I think we had to be like, you know what? You will be great with a wrench. Here's the wrench. I think you get to tightening them desks up during recess.

[C]

Listen, I'll crush that interview. I'm good at being sociable and present, but once it comes to the real work, no, I'm a fuck that up. So maybe somebody should tell me that early, right?

[A]

So I don't waste my time trying to be a astronaut, engineer, or my favorite scam job that the children. I don't even know where kids learn about this, but we all did a marine biologist. Every little that was 8 years old wanted to be a marine biologist.

[C]

I remember, speaking of scams, I remember in college, I had come. I had come to my final semester and realized that I had 20 credits that still needed to be filled.

[A]

And so I was like, that's a lot.

[C]

It's a lot. And I was in desperation mode to try to take whatever class was going to. I had to take like six or seven classes that semester to make it all work. And one of the classes I signed up for was biology because I was like, man, I love fish. I love whales. This is gonna be easy. It turns out it's actually a lot more complicated than fishing whales and not at all an easy science. So, yeah, we were all dumb for thinking marine biology was like some casual thing that we could sign up for,

[A]

because it absolutely was not. I want to show you this old lady, but I don't know if you're going to be able to see her from my phone. This is real ghetto. I don't know if you're going to be able to see this. Can you see this?

[C]

I see her. She got them glasses. I see you.

[A]

Yeah, this is the lady that homegirl said. This is the photo, and her name is Susan Xavier on Twitter, guys. So if Susan is doing a giveaway, she's not really doing it. And I'm gonna give y' all her whole handle. Cause I'm petty. It's Xavier112, Susan with a Z. This is all allegedly. Allegedly. She ran a scam on somebody. We only have the facts that we have. But Susan, you can't sue us because we said allegedly. But, yeah. So this is messy. So she. So when they're talking, she's like. She goes, it's needed for bitcoin verification. You have to. Okay, so this is what she goes. I hope you have the $50 for the Bitcoin verification. Just like she said before we proceed. And she was like, $50 for what? I don't have an extra 50 dol lying around. This is Nancy. Nancy's definitely black. That's just such a black way to say that. I don't got an extra 50 lying around. This is how we talk. So she said, it's needed for the bitcoin verification. You have to put in 50 on your cash app balance, so it'll send you a tag to send it to so I can receive the bitcoin and get the payment completed. This way you'll know that it's real and legit.

[C]

It's too many steps, dog.

[A]

So I see how she phrased it. I see how she phrased it. Like, the steps. The minutiae got you caught up, Nancy. Because she was like, okay, so this is what you got to do. First of all, Mark Zuckerberg is gonna get started, like, way too far away from the $5,000.

[C]

It just all sounds like you remember Die Hard 3, where he had to go from like, mailbox to fucking phone booth to. It's just too many steps. Just give me my goddamn money.

[A]

That.

[C]

What are we talking about?

[A]

No, you gotta go to the mailbox, and then you gotta go to the phone booth and then the fire station.

[C]

Yes, that's too much. Could just give me my cash. You said $5,000. Give me the ratio of whatever my 25 is gonna get me, and let's move on.

[A]

Right? But I. So, guys, this is another reminder that when you're this desperate. Look, the universe came through for Nancy. Cash app blocked it. God. Actually, the Devil. The devil blocked it.

[C]

You know what I mean? The devil said, hey, this too much. I'm on. I. I'm off. All right? As for me, I'm out. I can't do it. That's too much.

[A]

The devil said, 2020 has been a great year for me. I really came up when we talking about just, like, evil and souls, you know, we're. We're in the red. We're in the red.

[C]

I don't need it. I don't need this one. You know what, Nancy? You could chill. I get. I'm. I'mma look out for you real quick. Quick. And Nancy said, no, right? No. I've got a better app. I've got a different way of contacting you that won't block my blessing. Please.

[A]

See, the devil said, 25 ain't even enough for them to bother. They said, we don't get out of bed for less than.

[C]

Right? We're giving brown people hysterectomies in. In Texas. You think I give a Damn about your 25, Nancy? But no. Nancy was like, you're going to take my 25.

[A]

Yet she persisted. She said, like, honestly, Nancy, I don't know if you got scammed. It seems like you were like, no. Who wants to take me? Who?

[C]

It's like you went outside and were like, I'm trying to get jumped. I don't care who. I don't care where. Somebody jump me, please beat me up.

[A]

Yeah, Nancy, you really beyond asking for this. You kind of begged for it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So. And that's okay. That's okay. I hope you felt something, because right now, in quarantine, it's just good to feel something, you know? Like, I had some flies get into my house because I left. It was. This is terrifying.

[C]

I didn't know this. I didn't know this was this kind of podcast, but go ahead.

[A]

They're called Bottleneck Flies and. Or bottle flies. And one got into my house, and then I, like, left town for the weekend, and it, like, went in my trash. Wasn't a lot of trash, which is why I left it, because it was just like. I think there was, like, a couple things in the bottom. It, like, fucking made a home in there and then had all these fly kids.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

And I didn't know where these flies were coming from. And I keep my house clean, so I'm, like, bleaching everything again. I'm like, where the fuck are these flies coming from? Then I had to murder them all. And so, yeah, gang. Gang. So I had this, like, Eco friendly, like spray that didn't harm me, but killed these flies so quick. And when I tell you, as at a certain point I was having fun, I felt like I was playing Call of Duty. And then when they were all dead, I was like, damn, now what do I do?

[C]

Yeah, you know, that was the thing as a kid. I remember they used to always say this, video games are addictive. And then people like fought back and they were like, it's not addictive. The. The culture in America creates a system where we would believe in violence or, or lean towards violence. Video games are not the root of it. But a part of me was always like, I don't know, dog beating up prostitutes on Grand Theft Auto. That shit's pretty addictive. It's pretty. I don't know, I'm not saying it's the source, but it. It ain't not a part of it. Right.

[A]

I wish that they would take that out, especially because it's just the stigma of sex work. Like, I really hate that. That's still a feature. Now I can't say that when I was 11, I wasn't doing it. And then an 11 year old should not be doing that.

[C]

No. And that's what I mean. It's. I don't know, it certainly isn't a good thing. And I don't know that it's like the, the core of our problems as a society, but it definitely ain't helping. You're not creating a positive, healthy narrative around this thing much. In the way that you murdering these flies didn't make you a more peaceful person world. It may not have made you a monster. You're probably not going to kill a human being, but you've thought about it. Now that them flies are dead, you. You've considered it.

[A]

Look, I did consider, like, I don't know, letting a fly in just to kill.

[C]

Yeah. Come on in, big dog.

[A]

Look, I tried to let some free. I let some. I was trying to take them fries to freedom. I was the Harriet Tubman of the flies, okay? And I just want to be canceled.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

And then it just didn't work out. But guys, if we're allowed to come back for the rest of this podcast, we'll be right back after some non scam advertisements, scams, cons. And we're back. And it's time for my favorite segment of the show, Historic Hoodwinks. And this is where I will regale Langston with a famous or infamous or old school con or hoodwink and just get his opinions all throughout And I feel like. Like you might be a little clairvoyant.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Because earlier when you said you'd be pretending to be Creole or that you would like to.

[C]

I'd like to. I don't have that much confidence, but I would like to. And someday I'll earn that chance.

[A]

I think this is your time. But speaking of pretending to be people, today we're talking about Jessica Ann Krug, the former associate professor at George Washington University who claimed various identities within blackness to further her career as a black historian, even though she is a white person.

[C]

I've heard about this lady. I'm excited.

[A]

They're calling her Poser Parks.

[C]

The Internet, you know, I'll say this. The Internet always finds a new way to make things exciting. And this could have been a very hurtful story that devastated a lot of people. Because black people were overlooked for work, this lady was able to scam her way into a lot of positions of power and success. But then we get some funny shit on the back end, so I don't know, maybe it's worth it. Let her shine.

[A]

Times are dark if you're giving black people a laugh. I mean, okay, yeah, you stole jobs from us, but we also got that laugh. I don't know.

[C]

Hey, you a silly Billie. Keep going. I love it.

[A]

So we actually have footage of her as Jess La Bombaleria, a self given nickname with at best Apache accent, during a zoom in the New York City Council testimony as she speaks about gentrification and shouts out her black and brown siblings. Oh, and there's some fun comments, so maybe we'll see some of those too.

[C]

I love it.

[A]

Okay, let's look at this. Are y' all gonna hear it? That's all you need.

[B]

Anyway, I'm Jessa Bombalera. I'm here in el barrio, East Harlem. You probably know this neighborhood because the hosanna Melissa Mark Viverito, who used to be the speaker of your city council, sold my fucking neighborhood to developers in gentrifest. So I got a couple things to say, and when y' all come on and tell me, my time stops out of here. It's been seven hours. Not only did I have to listen to these cops, and not just the cops, but to be honest with y', all city council members, you posing like you opposing them for your sound bites, for your social media, for your re election campaigns, out of here. You've been supporting the cops in the pandemic when the MTA was strapped and you supported put in more cops on the mta. Fuck out of here. We know where you're coming from, and we know what these little photo opportunity bullshits are. I also want to call out, keep talking just with us to be able to speak. And that did not yield their time to black and brown indigenous who thought that their sense of. I thought cops was here to protect us, but I guess they're not. Boy, boy. I think that this sort of, like, shock and empathy thing is the move. Okay, so a couple of things.

[A]

Okay. Turn this shit up. Turn this shit up. Oh, my God.

[C]

Y love a Bronx girl. Being kids bopped. That was great. She's just kid bop in the Bronx. It's amazing.

[A]

Out of here, out of here. You know, she just sat at home in her mirror, like, out of here. Boy, boy, boy. No, that's Flavor of Love.

[C]

Oh, man, that's great. Good for her, cuz she really thought she was saying something. Like, she felt like, oh, okay, I'm about to sauce on y' all real quick by putting on this weird accent and she on a roof.

[A]

You didn't think she was spitting. You didn't have to take your headphones off for a moment there and just let the steam come out from just like.

[C]

I mean, I ain't gonna say she wasn't spitting. It just. It wasn't a spit. I like. But, you know, she was going off. I guess.

[A]

Here's the thing. The accents was. The accent is so bad, it's not even close to good. And, like, I guess white people would look at that and be like, I don't know. I guess that's probably an accent from somewhere.

[C]

Well, here's the thing that I think all of these people figure out in a. That that ends up being very effective is that black people would have called her out if she went and worked at a bank, right? If she went and did some, like, regular, like, capitalist, anti black, but instead her Rachel Dolezal. What they figure out is I'm gonna put myself in a position where I'm aligning with black and brown people. So when they hear my accent, they're already, like, rooting for me, so they don't really want to call it out. It's like they. We're on the same team, so I know you.

[B]

You.

[C]

You sound weird to me, lady. But all right, just keep talking. I don't know.

[A]

I think that's it. Like, that's what we talked about with Sean King, where it's like, we. We are trying to get to freedom. So nobody's trying to really interrupt the freedom train to be like, hold on. Does everybody got their tickets? Like, you know what I mean? Like, we're kind of like, if you. If you snuck on here, but you, like, on the train to freedom, we like you, Right? Like, that's fine, right? You.

[C]

You know the. The words to the black birthday song? All right, man, Keep. Keep singing it. I don't know. It ain't how I like to sing it, but go ahead. Go on, right?

[A]

Come on, boy. I love this so much, but this was when she was just. Which I think, like. Like you said, if you were ever gonna, like, pretend to be another race, it might be Creole. Mine would definitely be, like, afro cuano. I was definitely. Yo a la paol, mira. Okay, I got enough key phrases. I'd be like, ya to sabes.

[B]

You know?

[A]

Like, they'd be like, where are you from? I'm like, my father is from Cuba.

[C]

Hey, there you go.

[A]

You know what I mean? Like, I could get. I could get pretty close to getting away with that. You know what I mean?

[C]

Anyways, you're skipping over that B in a way that they. They like. You know what I mean?

[A]

You go to that. They don't call it the beach. They call it the.

[C]

Yeah. I used to live in Miami, and

[A]

I was studying in the shadows.

[C]

I was sitting outside of houses just listening to Cuban, gaining knowledge.

[A]

And that's very easy in Miami because everybody in Miami loves to, at least when I was a kid there, put their flags up places. So it was very easy to spot a Puerto Rican flag and just, like, go listen outside. Like, that was not hard. Shout out to anybody in Miami who ever had one of those necklaces. That's like a little boy holding a flag. Everyone used to have them in school when I was 13. And, like, there were, like, Jamaican ones, ones from Trinidad, one's from Puerto Rico, and I didn't have one. So people would always ask me, like, where I was from. And I was like, oh, I'm from Texas. They're like, no, but where are you from? And I was like, texas. They're like, no, like, where are you from? Like, what country? I was like, western Africa. You know what city I would guess

[C]

is what you're describing is the best that Florida has to offer, that Miami is the. Is the best thing in Florida. And that's all they had was necklace. Necklaces with flags on them as identifiers.

[A]

Listen, I love it. You got. If you know your culture, if you're lucky enough to know exactly where you come from, like, you got a flag. Like, I got a flag. With a fist on it. But that ain't really gonna give me, like, a geolocation.

[C]

I got a Questlove pin. Is that where I'm from? From Philadelphia. I think wherever Quest Love is from,

[A]

y' all know the motherland off of African street. That's where I'm from. So. So just crazy accent. She ended up confessing this whole thing, right? By publishing on a platform medium. A few days after, some people made waves like Adele by sporting bantu knots and a Jamaican flag bikini at Carnival. I didn't think that was bad. The Jamaicans told me that they like it, and I was like, if y' all like it, I look it.

[C]

I. I think the real bad person in that Adele story is the girl who posted that picture. Like, who?

[A]

Adele posted it?

[C]

No, but you know what I mean. Like, Adele posted it, but there was somebody who took the picture. Knowing Adele was, like, being set up to look dumb. And it's like she was having fun with her homies. She was having a good time dancing, doing Jamaican, whatever that was. And her friend was like. Like, Adele, we should capture this moment. And the. Don't even like taking pictures like that. She don't be posting that often. And so then she got caught up in, like, a bad look, when in fact, it was just like, oh, be cool. Like, just be. It's Beyonce.

[A]

Like, yeah, let her have her bed, too. Nice and peace.

[C]

Problematic and quiet. That's. That's what she's supposed to be. It was silly.

[A]

Yeah, I think you're right. It does feel like a setup a little bit. And, you know, if Adele want to roll pondeep, you know, then we got to let her do that. I'm not mad at it. So Krug's post, that came kind of out of nowhere to us, but I'll let you know. How it ended up starting was to escalating a degree over my adult life. I have eschewed my lived experience as a white Jewish child in a suburban Kansas City neighborhood under various assumed identities with blackness that I had no right to claim. First North African blackness, then. Then us rooted blackness, then Caribbean rooted Bronx blackness.

[C]

So, Jesus Christ, she went on the world tour. That's nuts. That's some full Drake shit. That's wild. She went from. She went from regular old Canada Drake to London Drake to Caribbean Drake. That's. That's fucking nuts.

[A]

Right?

[C]

And not a hit song in there.

[A]

And not a hit song in there. Jessica, you could at least given us some bops at least when Drake's like, I. I Take a for granted oh, I'm too good to you we get a hit. We get Rihanna on it. Except for when he went and tried to do that London rap. I hate UK rap. I'm sorry if you're a UK listener, but that skibidi pop me got some tea, my friends three, like, I'm sorry. That is a week.

[C]

I will say that if what you're listening to says skimmity pop pop, you're probably. I understand why you don't, like. Doesn't sound good to me either.

[A]

It all sounds like your man's not hot to me. You know, they like, pull up with the willy before we get out with

[C]

the P. Like, I don't mind British rap until British rap starts talking like, gangster. And then I. I can't do it. Like. And I'm sure y' all are mean and tough and murder people and all that, but you sound silly to me. So, like. Like, just talk about having sex with girls and I get. You know, I'll make peace with your British rap or whatever this is.

[A]

Yeah, you can talk about activism. We would love, like, you know, give us some Craig David.

[C]

Talk about soccer. Y' all voice sound good in soccer, but don't talk about murder. I don't. It sounds goofy as I know that's

[A]

my favorite British rap song. Red Card. It's so good. It's my favorite. So she basically was like, sorry, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

I was pretending to be everybody. She said, I'm every Negro. It's all in me. And so her blog failed to provide actual details, but she wrote that she assumed that mental health issues based on her childhood trauma were the root cause of her behavior. I don't like when people blame the mental health community for fuck shit, because a lot of people have mental health issues and they're nice people, and they don't go around pretending to be identities and take up space that's not theirs.

[C]

Yeah, that. And even that has literally nothing to do with what, like, you could maybe, maybe. Maybe there's a claim that you could say that, like, my mental health had some sort of, like, caused some version of an identity crisis within me at certain points in my life. But it didn't make you do all that work to actually, like, take on the new identity. Identity that's just you and you're sick. That ain't got to do with, like, any. You know.

[A]

Yeah. Your mental illness wasn't like, let's go to the Queen collection at Walmart. All the brown shades. Like, no, you did that.

[C]

No, you That's a hundred percent.

[A]

You don't blame outside factors for that. So this is how it started. Some of Krug's students were interviewed by the Cut. The Cut is always out here dragging people. New York Times was like, can we make just, like, a message? Messy, petty bitch column that lives for drama. They're like, yes, we can. It's called the Cut. We just gonna do trash over there. Upscale trash. So they remember recalling a very heavy accent, an affected brown girl. Cool. And Rebecca Ahmadi, class of 2019, said, the things that she taught me could have been done without this whole minstrel show of a Persona. So maybe she was actually talking that talk talk, but she was flipping the chair around.

[C]

Sure. She was really ac. Slatering her classes. Just like, I'm. I want to get down and honest with y'. All.

[A]

Come on, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

Let's dig deep, boy. Fam.

[C]

Y' all trying to get to Black Liberation Home, dog. Or why are you talking like this?

[A]

It's also the emphasis on everything that she knows is slang. Whenever the slang word comes. Comes up, she's like, out of here.

[C]

Yeah, she's. It's. It's music for her, and she's trying to hit them notes.

[A]

She learned all of this from Deaf Poetry Jam. I miss Deaf Poetry Jam. People cadences.

[C]

Yeah, I love it. I wanted to be on that show so bad.

[A]

I did, too. I remember trying to write some poems. I was trash, but I had the cadence down, so I was like, I could probably fool somebody. So before she had come out, her ratings on Rate My professor were a 2.6 out of five. God damn, that's low. And it included a reviewer who rated her as awful and said, if you ask her the history about World War II, Nazi Germany, cold War, or something like those, she will only answer you with the history about the Caribbeans and Africa.

[C]

Damn. So, okay, that's trash because she's a Jewish lady and she ain't even up on World War II. Like. Like, that's. That's. You should know that one. That one's pretty important in. In Jewish history.

[A]

Like, culturally, that's like us not knowing about slavery. Like, we. Yeah, we know quite a bit.

[C]

Yeah, I know when to tag in and tag out. That's one that you should have been in on.

[A]

But she was like, look, I studied these things, so, like, how do you even reroute something like that if someone's like, so when the blitzkrieg happened, and you're like, well, when you say Blitz Creek, that makes me think of Bliss Te.

[C]

What she did? What she did. They said when the blitz creek happened, she went blitz creek. And then they were like, hey, that ain't teaching, dog. You gotta stop doing that. Please stop. Please stop pretend shooting guns up in the air while I'm talking to you about important stuff.

[A]

That's how she got all the way back to the Caribbean culture. She just went blitz cream. Quick, quick. That's beautiful. Oh, goodness. So another student rated her average and said, krug's class is definitely not your white man's history class. I'm guessing you're a white man if you're saying that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Or a white.

[C]

No, it's probably a white lady. They be turning on their people

[A]

as they should. As they should. White women.

[C]

We need you to.

[A]

We need you to turn your backs on your husbands. If they're voting Republican this year, you need to. To cheat on them. Okay?

[C]

Yeah, we can't count on them. They be acting up on us too. They like turning on people.

[A]

I know. Just anybody. But when you get in the booth, nobody knows what you doing there but you, girl.

[C]

And that's why I want to change it. So that at any point, some. A black lady could just rip open the curtain and go, what you doing? What you doing? Put it back. Put it back in there. And then you gotta like, be held accountable that way.

[B]

Way.

[A]

Why do black women have to do all the leg work? Why are there all these extra black women at the polls? Oh, yeah, they just work in conscience management.

[C]

They. They rip open the curtain. That's our rip open the curtain lady. Her name's Cheryl. She do good work.

[A]

Yeah. Look, she don't tell you who to vote for.

[C]

No, she just say what. She just say, what you doing? And look at you, real mean and you know what to do. You know the right choice.

[A]

Right. She's just getting you to do what you know you should do anyway. Yes, that's my volunteer position at the polls. I was just be ripping the curse curtains back. Don't think that's illegal at all. What are laws? So Krug latched onto the myth of her light skin presentation. According to the junior professor during grad school, Krug called herself high yellow and playfully derogatory term for fair African American set. Has anyone ever called you high yellow?

[C]

All my life. Yeah. You know what's devastating? I was thinking about this the other day is all these people who come come forward, these Jessica Cruz, these Rachel Dolezals. I'm the same goddamn skin color they be pretending to be. And it. It hurts. My feelings every time. I've been a black, a black person my whole life. And then I, I know that's what scares me is maybe I'm not supposed to be, ah, maybe I'm just, I just think I, I am. And here I am matching a, a falsifier, a, a trickster.

[A]

A trickster. One thing I will say too, that this does play into colorism. Like I've noticed that these types, at least with Dolezal and Krug, they both have kind of have the similar thing with their features where they have larger noses and like, you know, some features that you see on black women more readily and are more appreciated on black women because unfortunately with Eurocentric beauty standards, like it's like the thin, pointy nose that all, all the, you know, white folks aspire to have. But if you have a wider nose and you're black, it's looked at more like favorable, especially if your skin is fair. So they're pretending to be like the type of woman that every white woman is pretending to be right now anyway. Kim Kardashian is pretending to be a light skinned black woman. Kylie Jenner is pretending to be a light skinned black. They call it tanning. That's called light skin defying.

[C]

There's a, there's a new Chloe picture out where she looks identical to like 2004 Beyonce because that's just what they've been shifting their faces and bodies to try to be for the past like decade. But yeah, I think, I think so much of it, to your point, is about rejection, right? That like you felt in some way rejected from the white community, from, for the way that you looked or the way that you felt like you looked in the world. And so you figured, all right, well, I'll just like rub some tanner on, on and make myself a part of a community that might appreciate it more, right?

[A]

That's like more accepting. Even though obviously there's colorism within the black community. You're putting yourself on the highest end of the spectrum of colorism in a black community. Like as a dark skinned black woman, that's been my life, my entire life. Oh, you're pretty for a dark skinned girl.

[C]

Or.

[A]

Oh, you know, or like going places. It used to be my biggest scam. I used to hang out with like a bunch of professional athletes all the time in college and they would take us places and buy us stuff and like, whatever. And because I had dark skin, no one ever tried to like push up on me or try to like have sex with me so I could Just go places and be invisible and just be like, yeah, charge it to the room.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

It was the one time that colorism was a real benefit because I was not trying to fuck with none of them. So I was like, first of all,

[C]

it's beautiful, but it's also devastating. It's like, no, you should have been sexually made uncomfortable the same way all the light skinned girls were. You're a pretty girl. This. You should have. You deserve the same opportunities to get a me too case against some professional athlete. Just like every other light skinned girl and white girl that was hanging around in these areas.

[A]

Oh my goodness, I'm weak. This episode is wild. Like, I knew the moment I met you, I was like, this is going to be crazy and I love it. So. So according to a junior professor during grad school we said that she's calling herself high yellow. An Afro Latinx junior professor who worked in Krug's field anonymously said that she had been following her transformation for a while. Oop. So this is what happened. You got a hater on your tail. You gotta hater on your tail.

[C]

It's like, catch me if you can. This is. This is your Tom Hanks. He coming for you, right?

[A]

Like she's gonna catch you being white at some point. So. So she noted that the first time that they spoke, Krug would talk about us and we. And I was scratching my head like, us and we.

[C]

Who is we? It's just me in here.

[A]

Who is we? Who?

[C]

It's me and you. You, You. I'm me, right?

[A]

When you say we a lot. Oh, you speak French now. Like what? Shout out to Drake Drizzly.

[C]

He never lets us down. He's the king of appropriation. But he never lets us down.

[A]

Right? And he knows how far he can take it. Okay. He started out, you know, appropriating like they used to call him. This is so up. And this is not me saying anything negative to the ADA community. But people used to call him Wheelchair Jimmy.

[C]

Yes, they did, for a long time

[A]

because he played a role on Degrassi that he was in a wheelchair. And it was like, what is. So she's got somebody on her tail who's like, why are you saying us and we? And then she goes, oh. And then I realized she missed meant black. So Krug initially claimed to be born of an immigrant mother from Algeria and a white father of German descent. Well, she was cooking it up. This is. This is spicy. Back then, Krug talked about herself as a product of a severe family trauma. So this Scholar and other Latinx friends had doubts about Krug's claims, but didn't want to push the subject because she was like, no, but this is my trauma, though, right? Like, I don't like to talk about anything about me factually, because that's my traumatic. Traumatic experience.

[C]

Mama, I'm sick. We can't talk about this no more. I. I can't.

[A]

Okay? The trauma is too much. Now send me the $50 so I can send you to 5,000. Like, what? So she said it came to a point when they were just like, this is. You know, I love that. And she quietly broke all ties with Krug. Years later, Krug came back into her life when some mutual Facebook friends. Facebook Messi. Posted articles that Krug had written for Race Baiter, a platform whose focus was Race Forward news and criticism. Krug later wrote articles for essence.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Come on. Essence. Y' all gotta do some kind of fact checking. Some kind of. Just have some. Make them show credentials at the door at least. Like, what do you.

[A]

That's our most elite black magazine.

[C]

Come on.

[A]

Now I can see if she got into jet. Like, if she started writing for Hair.

[C]

Make her the thick lady on page 3057 of Jet. But, like, you can't. Why is she writing articles for your publication?

[A]

These articles are now deleted, but included pieces like on Puerto Rico, Blackness, and being when nations aren't enough. What does that even mean? And somos mas y no te nemos medo medio. I don't know why I said that wrong. Somos mosi y not what the Puerto Rican uprising means for black political imaginary imagination.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

She was. Listen, she was a forward thinker. And I bet those articles said a lot of important things from that Jewish lady who was pretending to be completely different than she is her old friend.

[A]

Okay, so she also wrote, in Essence, that she was boricua, apparently abandoning her Algerian roots in favor of Spanish Harlem. So by the time she got to essence, she was like, I'm Boris Morena. And they were like, you're just singing a song. So then her old friend, the anonymous junior professor, responded, saying, I just sat quietly with it because who was gonna believe me? It is a wild thing to try to come out and be like, this lady white. It's weird. So this is how she got caught. We're wrapping the song up. A moment of synchronicity happened when revered Cuban American author H.D. carrillo died and was revealed that he had been a fraud, too. Damn.

[C]

Holy shit.

[A]

All the light skins are coming out.

[C]

God damn. I Might. I gotta do some research. I might be lying. I don't know what I am no more. I'm really unpacking a lot of shit

[A]

emotionally leaving this with an identity crisis.

[C]

Hell, yeah.

[A]

So he was originally born in Michigan, not Cuba, to black American parents with no Latino heritage. So this would be my stance.

[C]

It

[A]

they're like, lacy, this whole time you were just from Texas and black. No, no, no, no.

[C]

You hear me? You see how I pronounced it?

[A]

No, you see, you heard that

[C]

I'm rolling my R. If I'm rolling my R, then I'm legit. What are we talking about?

[A]

Right? If I'm saying out of here,

[B]

you

[A]

know what time it is. So this guy comes out, the anonymous junior professor caught the wave, and hinted on Twitter that Carrillo may not be the only person whose identity is fake. One of the people to catch this text was Associate Professor Afro Diaspora Studies at Ms. Oh, my God, so many titles. Anyway, Yamra caught this tweet, and with the help of another scholar, Figaro Vasquez, was able to research Krug's past and ultimately found the truth of her identity through the obituaries of Krug. Krug's parents. Damn. Y' all went and dug up our parents. All beach words. Y' all was on the open. Oh, my God.

[C]

They were tired of her with that

[A]

information, ready to share. Damn. They said, we were not trying to ruin her life. We were really thinking, as black Latino women, how do we do this ethically? See, why are we like this? Like, even at the end of the day, when white folks be doing us so dirty, we'd be like, okay, but what's the right thing to do? I said on Twitter, I think where

[C]

she up was, she changed identities too many times. She could have got away with this if. If she. If it weren't obviously for those. Those damn kids, but also because meddling kids. But I think she also wanted to be too many things too many times. You just gotta pick one, stay in that, keep doing more research, lock in skin. But she wanted, you know, every new wave, she wanted to add to her diaspora to her new voice. And it's like, now people getting upset, you upsetting some people, right?

[A]

I think she was also trying to find, like, the easiest race to pretend to be. She's like, okay, you know what? I don't know why I started with Algeria. Now I gotta know a whole bunch of stuff about Africa. She's like, let me bring it. Let me bring it back to the Bronx. She was like, then I just got to be like a JLO amount a from New York.

[C]

That's a. That's an easy out identity. You just got to be grumpy and. And talk about trains. Ain't no studying required.

[A]

Own tims

[C]

some door knocker earrings and talk about the 2 train. You'll figure it out, right?

[A]

She was like, this is much easier than when I was pretending to be from Algeria. People are asking less questions. So they tried to gather information from colleagues of Cruz, but crew got tipped off because within eight days of their first convers about Krug, the Medium post had drizzoped. She was like, oh, y' all about to come out. I'mma beat you to the punch, right? And I love it. And she said in her blog post, this is the final thoughts from Ms. Krug. I am not a culture vulture. I am a culture leech. And you should absolutely cancel me, boy. And I absolutely cancel my myself. Fuck out of here. Within 24 hours, the blog obviously blew up, and colleagues called for her resignation. She was tenured, so she was also in a very good spot where she was never gonna be fired. Like, she had tenure. She shortly after decided to resign. But I'm sure now she gonna get the Rachel Dolezal doc.

[C]

She'll get a documentary. She probably got a cool parachute package. Just legally, they have to give her something to walk away from whatever they.

[A]

That is Right. Technically, what she did wasn't illegal or. I don't know if the university has policies that are like, you can't tell us you're black when you're not. Did they write that down?

[C]

Yeah. That's wild. It's. That's like that airbud, you know what I mean? It's like, there's no rule. There's no rule that says that you can't put a dog in a basketball game in. In the same way, there's no rule that says that you can't be fake black and apply for jobs in African American studies or Caribbean, whatever. She was black.

[A]

I want to support the whole fake black movement, but the only way I can get behind it is if I can be fake white. Like I told y', all, at some point, I need to ascend into being a white lady and then into a white man, and I need everybody to believe it, and I need to have all the privileges. So if we can work that out, then y' all can continue to be Langston's cousins online.

[C]

First of all, how dare you. Second of all, I'm cool with you being a part of the fake black Movement. But you got to deal with. With whatever the worst thing is that happened to that week at the day that you joined. So if. If somebody got shot, you got to take some bullets just to be a part of. You got to get jumped in, basically, to whatever this black experience that you want to have.

[A]

The sad thing is, once you get jumped into the black experience, you just keep getting jumped because that's the black experience.

[C]

I love that. Yeah. Welcome

[A]

and be like, what did I do?

[C]

Listen, the bottom of these shoes are fine. Take a dip.

[A]

All right, guys, we will be right back for the end of the show. Robbery and fraud. All right. And we're back. And this is the saddest part of the show, because this is where I have to let Lil Nice thing go, fam. You know what I mean? I can't even do a one.

[C]

This is very good.

[A]

Okay. You know when y' all was posing. Okay. Anyway, the posing. The posers like, where is this access, sis? I love it. The flavor. The lack of flavor. Giving us nothing. Give us nothing, Jessica. Yes, bitch.

[C]

I love sea salt. Pretending to be Lowry. So let's do it. It's great.

[A]

So this is kind of sad, but also kind of beautiful. There's a place place called Vernon, Florida, that was re. Nicknamed Nub City.

[C]

Nub.

[A]

Nub City.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Because it became. And I don't. I don't fuck with that name. I'm not really, like, big on the Ableist shit, like, you know, but there's a reason that they're calling it that. So Nub City became responsible for the panhandling claiming of two. I'm sorry. Yeah. For the panhandle claiming two thirds of all loss of limb access residents in all of the United States, due to a widespread insurance scam where individuals would get money for cutting off a part of their body. Whoa,

[C]

wait, so you. You telling me that these people. Everybody in this neighborhood, in this city got tricked into cutting off a part of their body?

[A]

No, they didn't get tricked. They were like, let's do this.

[C]

Oh. They collectively were like, we about to get this money. Cut them fingers off. It's Nub town.

[A]

That's crazy. So in the mid 20th century, the town was in a deep economic struggle as the sawmill, which provided many people's jobs, closed down. A sawmill is like a lumber mill where they, like, cut the logs into the lumber that we use. It's unknown how the scam officially initially started, but rumor has it that someone legitimately lost a limb and got a nice payout for their life. Insurance policy. After word got out that some nub club members sawed and hacked off their own limbs, though most took an easier route with a shotgun.

[C]

Me. How is that easier?

[A]

Saw. You gotta. You gotta keep cutting. You gotta. Him.

[C]

That's. Oh, man, that's crazy.

[A]

Because also, if you hack wrong and you gotta keep going. Oh, I can't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for this image, you guys. We're gonna push through this. So the justifications were sometimes completely absurd. This is what I love. One man told the insurance company that he shot his hand while aiming for a hawk. Okay. Another man claimed that he shot his own foot because he thought it was a squirrel.

[C]

All right.

[A]

You ain't never thought your foot was a squirrel.

[C]

Tomorrow. I had on some fuzzy slippers that was moving. I just. I shot. I don't know. Here I am. Where's my money?

[A]

Right here I am with my duffel bag, ready to get my cash. Thanks so much. And then the preferred technique was to lose an arm and a leg on the opposite side of the body so that you could still use a crutch. I know.

[C]

Wait, so they're. Hold on. They're taking entire. They're taking the good parts. I thought they would like you. You lose, like, a finger. My. My mother's father, who I never knew, but apparently was a hell of an alcoholic. The best. But he.

[A]

He. Number one.

[C]

Number one. He was the champ. He won, but. So he worked in. In. In Detroit. He worked in one of the auto factories, and he lost his fingers to the point where he basically just had, like, this.

[B]

This.

[C]

Like, this was all he had. I can't remember if it was just the pinky or just the. The pointer, but everything else got cut off in, like, a thing. And he didn't get any money, and it made him real sad. But the idea of taking an entire limb, that's crazy.

[A]

And it's kind of a risk, too, because it's not like, you know, you're gonna get the money. Like, I mean, whoever the last person was in this scam, you know, like, they probably didn't get the back or survive it.

[C]

Like, you're. You're litter. You're cutting off a limb. You're gonna. You're. You might die. There's a high chance that you're gonna die.

[A]

Right? Which just speaks to the desperation in this country that's always been here of, like, making money. And when people are ready to be like, you know what? This is how we get the bag. That's like, it's so disheartening. But at the same time, none of these people are gonna get caught. And that's what I love about this. So the common payouts were between 5,000 and $10,000, which is enough.

[C]

I thought you were going to say 100, $100,000.

[A]

But this is like the 60s, the 50s. So it was worth a little bit.

[C]

What? So now you can afford an Oldsmobile? Get the out of here. This is terrible.

[A]

So one farmer claimed to have lost a foot and was awarded nearly a million dollars even though there was evidence that suggested self reputation. So come on now, that foot, that was worth it. Yeah. I think it's like what kind of policy you could afford to take out because you got to take the policy out and pay on it for a little bit. So the farmer probably has some coin. It was almost impossible to convict the scammers of fraud because it was so difficult to convince jury members that people would willingly self amputate. The scam ended in the late 1960s because premium rates became too high and insurers halted businesses in the Florida panhandle all together. So they were just like, we're not even going to insure any of you because we know what's up.

[C]

Damn. So there are families in that same area now who can't get insurance because their grandfather was like, I'mma shoot my foot off and get paid real quick.

[A]

Yes. And at one point somebody was trying to make a documentary about it called a nub city. But when the guy went there to start filming all of the time, townspeople like started beating him up and stuff or threaten him. So

[C]

they beat the out of him with them nubs. We ain't telling you a goddamn thing here in Nub city.

[A]

So he did end up not making a documentary about that.

[C]

I love that. Good for them. They, they listen. They, they pulled off a scam, albeit not a lot of money and certainly not a choice that I would have made. But I respectfully. They made the scam happen. Happen. And they stayed loyal. They were a town of down ass that didn't turn on each other when it came to somebody showing up and offering like some chump change for a documentary about what they had done.

[A]

Right. Because they were trying to sell out. That's how you know they're true to the game. They were really about that life. And I just want to give an update since we're talking about this. The woman who saw it off her hand with a circular saw for a 1.2 million dollar insurance scam. Unfortunately she was sentenced to two years in jail. That breaks my heart because I wanted her to be free and frolic and also get $1.2 million.

[C]

I was about to say they took that money, too, if she went to jail for it.

[A]

Yup. So, you know, hate to see it, but I'm glad to hear that There's a whole town that robbed the insurance industry for decades. Yes.

[C]

Good for y'. All.

[A]

Oh, that reaches the conclusion of the show. Langston, we always ask people, where do you move, want to be found? Anything you want to plug?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Scams you want people to participate in?

[C]

Well, the. The greatest scam of all time. Listen to my podcast. It's. It's called My Mama Told Me. It's about black conspiracy theories and black people making up conspiracy theories and the ones we grew up with. And it's very funny. And Lacy's gonna be on an episode soon. Yeah, it's very. It's a great time. And you can follow me at Langston Kerman on all platforms forms. It ain't nobody else has my name, and nobody else would want to. So it's. It's easy. It's a name. No, it's fine. Yeah, that's it.

[A]

All right. Wonderful as always. Scam got his pod. Gmail.com, email us in and snitch on your friends and family. Just make sure that the scam is retired. And if you want to follow me, you can follow me at D I V A L A C I Diva Lacey I on all platforms. And you can follow Scam Goddess on all platforms. Ooh, y', all, I'mma be on TV talking about scam soon. November 4th. Check out ABC's the Con. I'm gonna be on there talking about scams as an expert. What? That's a scam in itself. All right, y'. All, congregation, stay scheming.