I’m joined by Colette Jane Fehr, couples therapist, relationship expert, and author of The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations That Create Secure, Lasting Love. We talk about why “not fighting” isn’t the same as being connected, how losing your voice can slowly erode a relationship, and what it actually means to do the work in love. Colette shares how her own divorce, dating experiences, and attachment patterns shaped the way she shows up in her second marriage, and why speaking up (even when it’s scary) is the key to secure love. We get into conflict avoidance, anxious vs. avoidant dynamics, the fear of being “too much,” and more.

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Not Fighting Isn’t the Same as Being Close