Liza Treyger

Summary

Podcast Summary: Senses Working Overtime with David Cross
Episode: Liza Treyger
Release Date: February 27, 2025
Host: David Cross (Headgum)
Guest: Liza Treyger

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1. Introduction and Personal Background

[01:14 - 02:16]

The episode kicks off with David Cross introducing Liza Treyger, delving into the nuances of her name and cultural background. Liza explains, “My full name is Yele Zaveta. So it's just like the shortened, like it's popped out, it's foreign” ([01:46]). She was born in the Soviet Union, present-day Ukraine, and often faces misunderstandings about her nationality. Liza shares her frustrations with people assuming she's Russian, stating, “Why are you speaking Russian, you fucking bitch?” ([01:58]). This cultural identity discussion sets the stage for exploring Liza's unique experiences and perspectives.

2. Comedy and Podcasting Ventures

[03:20 - 12:00]

Liza reveals her long-standing passion for comedy, highlighting her 15-year journey that began in Chicago’s vibrant comedy scene. She appreciates the camaraderie she found there: “I am still friends with a lot of the people I met in those bars, and that feels nice” ([04:27]). Transitioning to her podcasting endeavors, Liza discusses her Law and Order SVU podcast where she recaps episodes and dives deep into true crime stories. She mentions, “I study a lot about pedophiles because of a Law and Order SVU podcast” ([07:38]). The conversation shifts to harrowing true crime cases that have impacted her deeply, such as the Ohio basement kidnapping case, emphasizing the emotional toll these stories take on her ([08:10]).

3. Personal Experiences and Paranoia

[12:00 - 15:09]

The dialogue becomes more personal as Liza shares unsettling experiences that have heightened her sense of paranoia. She recounts being attacked outside her apartment and encountering suspicious individuals: “I have been attacked out and about” ([12:35]). Liza discusses her strategies to stay safe, like avoiding turning on lights when returning home, reflecting her increased vigilance in a seemingly unpredictable world ([12:56]).

4. Comedy Special and Indie Projects

[13:00 - 51:20]

Liza talks about her comedy special, "Night Owl," available on Netflix, showcasing her ability to blend humor with personal anecdotes: “Owl Night Owl” ([13:30]). She discusses the financial aspects of production, choosing to invest her earnings back into her work to maintain creative control. The conversation then transitions to her experiences working on indie films, describing challenges and learning moments during production. Liza highlights the collaborative spirit of indie filmmaking, despite logistical hurdles like extreme heat during shoots ([44:15 - 48:33]).

5. Media Influence and Political Polarization

[33:52 - 39:59]

A significant portion of the episode delves into the impact of media on political polarization. Liza and David discuss how different media outlets, like Fox News and podcasts, amplify divisions, making it difficult for politicians like President Biden and public figures to communicate effectively. They explore the culture wars and their effects on voter behavior, with Liza noting, “Republicans have consistently, for generations, voted against their own self-interest” ([36:33]). The conversation highlights the challenges Democrats face in countering the aggressive narratives propagated by certain media channels ([36:52]).

6. Personal Relationships and Trust Issues

[55:42 - 62:15]

Liza opens up about her struggles with trust and honesty in friendships. She shares a poignant story about a friend who repeatedly lied, leading to the deterioration of their relationship: “And I caught them, like, doing even worse stuff” ([59:31]). This segment underscores the importance of trust and authenticity in personal connections, with Liza expressing her discomfort with deceit: “I don’t like liars either” ([58:46]).

7. Humorous Anecdotes and Light-Hearted Moments

[68:15 - 70:32]

Towards the end of the episode, Liza and David engage in light-hearted banter, addressing a humorous question from David’s daughter about farting. Liza humorously deflects the question, maintaining her discomfort with poop humor while still participating in the playful exchange: “How do I fart in the mornings?” ([68:15]). This segment provides a brief respite from the heavier topics discussed earlier, showcasing the natural flow and chemistry between the host and guest.

8. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

[70:37 - End]

The episode wraps up with David Cross offering closing remarks, thanking Liza Treyger for her insights and participation. Although Liza attempts to maintain her composure during the humorous finale, the overall tone remains friendly and appreciative of the engaging conversation they shared throughout the episode.

---

Notable Quotes

• Liza Treyger on Cultural Identity:
  “Why are you speaking Russian, you fucking bitch?” ([01:58])

• On True Crime Impact:
  “Not favorite. We like haunting. Like the ones that have haunted me the most, that like scare me and have changed my being...” ([08:10])

• On Media and Politics:
  “Republicans have consistently, for generations, voted against their own self-interest. A lot of the reason is because of culture war. This, this, this time it was trans and it works. Before that it's gay people and it works.” ([36:33])

• On Trust and Honesty:
  “I don't like liars either. And I've just was lied to by... when you get... Now, the whole friendship is ruined.” ([59:38])

• Humorous Exchange:
  Daughter’s Question: “How do you fart?” ([68:15])
  Liza's Response: “How do I fart in the mornings?”

---

Key Takeaways

• Cultural Identity: Liza Treyger's background as a Soviet Union-born individual in the U.S. offers a unique perspective on identity and the challenges of cultural misunderstandings.

• Passion for Comedy and Storytelling: Her extensive experience in comedy and podcasting highlights her commitment to engaging audiences through humor and storytelling, especially in the true crime genre.

• Impact of Media on Society: The episode underscores the significant role media plays in shaping political landscapes and societal divisions, raising concerns about misinformation and polarization.

• Personal Integrity: Liza emphasizes the importance of honesty and trust in personal relationships, sharing her experiences to highlight the detrimental effects of deceit.

• Balancing Heavy and Light Topics: While addressing serious issues, the conversation also incorporates humor and personal anecdotes, maintaining a balanced and engaging narrative throughout the episode.

---

Final Note:
This summary encapsulates the rich and multifaceted discussion between David Cross and Liza Treyger, providing listeners with an in-depth overview of the episode's key points, insights, and memorable moments.

Transcript

[A]

This is a headgum podcast. Get the Angel REEF special at McDonald's. Now, let's break it down. My favorite barbecue sauce, American cheese, crispy bacon, pickles, onions, and a sesame seed bun, of course. And don't forget the fries and a drink. Sound good?

[B]

I participate in restaurants for a limited time. Jesus.

[A]

I'll do this one.

[B]

That one over there. You sure?

[A]

I'm so excited.

[B]

Why?

[A]

What do you mean? I'm pumped.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I was just here doing Caleb Heron's podcast.

[B]

I don't know who that is.

[A]

Oh, he's fun. Yeah, you guys would have some fun.

[B]

Who's Caleb Herron?

[A]

He's like a new young. I mean, he's 30, but he's just like a genius young comedian.

[B]

Oh, right on. Cool.

[A]

Gay, fun kind.

[B]

Yeah. Good. Those are three good things.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, one is sort of like, whatever. And so it's Liza. Yeah, but it's spelled L I Z A, so. Have you ever thought of changing your name to Lisa with an I? But it sounds like an E. Isn't.

[A]

That what it is?

[B]

Yeah, but you would. This way you would inform. I'm sure you get Liza a lot.

[A]

I do. So my full name is Yele Zaveta. So it's just like the shortened. Like it's popped out, it's foreign.

[B]

And is that Eastern European?

[A]

Soviet Union.

[B]

Soviet Union. Oh, going way back. Not Russia.

[A]

I was born pre collapse. Okay, so it's present day Ukraine, but we're Russian speaking.

[B]

Right, got it.

[A]

So no matter what I say to people, sometimes in public, they'll argue with me.

[B]

About what?

[A]

Why are you speaking Russian, you fucking bitch? They would bomb me out. People online, people hit me up or like, I'll meet someone and be like, oh, I'm Russian. I'll be like, I'm from odsn. And they're like, that's Ukraine.

[B]

And I'm like, oh, oh, I see. It's the nationalist tribal stuff coming in. Got it.

[A]

Yes. So then I started saying from the former Soviet Union to kind of like, I get it.

[B]

But it just begs more questions and you're like, oh, what? Yeah, like Estonia or. What are you talking about?

[A]

I know it's. But people just say fucked up shit. So then I'm always trying to avoid some sort of situation. And then after the war, it's just like, kind of hard.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Have you met or met and. Or talked with Eugene Merman?

[A]

I have a great story. So I'm in a group at Just for Laughs, and I'm a fan of his. I'M excited. So I go up to him to be like, oh, you don't have. From what. You know. And he goes, oh, we're not going to do this right now. And I went, okay, okay. But then that was it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So that was my big interaction.

[B]

That's not a great story. I would amend that.

[A]

People that are, like, upfront if they don't want to participate. So I was okay with it. Like, for me.

[B]

Good. When did you start?

[A]

2009. I was 21.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I'm 37.

[B]

Plus 10 is 19 years. 20. 21. 77. 25. But also takeaway because of that. So you've been doing it for 15 years. Yeah. Okay. I just did the math on that. Where'd you start?

[A]

Chicago.

[B]

Oh, okay. Is that where you're from?

[A]

Yeah, I'm from the suburbs. I'm from Skokie.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I'm lucky. I'm lucky I got to start in a smaller scene. I don't know how I would have panned out if I started here.

[B]

No, that is. That is tougher. But you have more, you know, availability of more. You could go up four or five times a night almost every single night of the calendar year.

[A]

Yeah. What I liked was camaraderie. It's against. Because here you'd be running around and, like, buckets. And there we'd put our name in and be at one bar for seven hours.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

And so I am still friends with, like, a lot of the people I met in those bars, and that feels nice.

[B]

Can I say that, you know what a shortened version of camaraderie is? Is comrade.

[A]

Oh, my God. I thought you were gonna do a Sabrina Carpenter joke.

[B]

You bet. No.

[A]

And I couldn't believe it.

[B]

Nope. Wait, why? Why is.

[A]

Because she has a song right now where she goes, come, come on me. I mean, camaraderie. Something like that. Like, she does wordplay.

[B]

A play on words about.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Having somebody ejaculate on you. But what I meant was being friends.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

And being, you know. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Smoking weed in the car, like, in between things and, like, staying out late and all that.

[B]

Are you still doing the song or is this.

[A]

No, no, no.

[B]

This is you in. What is it? Muskokee?

[A]

I was in Skokie, but this is Chicago and, like. Yeah.

[B]

Oh. Home of the famous. What is it, the KKK or the neo Nazis?

[A]

Exactly. Yeah. The kkk.

[B]

Jewish representative said it's fought for their right to march.

[A]

Oh, yeah. We talked about that in school a lot. Yeah, it was the kkk. When I was a kid. And then we also had like, there was a three day racist killing spree that stopped in Skokie and they killed the Northwestern basketball coach near my house. But.

[B]

And what was the. What was the reason?

[A]

He was like just this like kind of Nazi type figure who got in with this leader and he was just like, racist and mad at everyone. So he started at Indiana University or Purdue, went to Rogers Park.

[B]

I think if you say racist, we can pretty much.

[A]

No.

[B]

Draw the line to mad at everyone. That's not white Christian nationalists. It's sort of their. That's their thing. Yeah.

[A]

So he killed like some Asian people in Indiana, killed Orthodox Jews in Rogers park, killed the black basketball coach in my neighborhood, and then was going down to U of I. So he got three.

[B]

Ticked three off the box. How long was his list? It was probably pretty long.

[A]

He was gonna go down and murder more, but they got him.

[B]

Yeah. Wow. When Was this?

[A]

The 90s?

[B]

God.

[A]

Because I wasn't even in junior high. I remember we all had to stay inside. Cause he was like out and about. Yeah, it was like out there killing. But yeah. But also we have a great library.

[B]

That's fantastic.

[A]

We have a great PETA Inn.

[B]

We have like a great what?

[A]

PETA Inn. It's like a philosophy spot.

[B]

P I T A. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I thought it was a PETA. Yes. Right. Cause the guest I had on yesterday.

[A]

Who?

[B]

Rachel Kelly.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

I was thinking. Because I knew I got her last night last name wrong, so I wanted to get it right this time. So I was. Rachel, Callie has a very interesting story regarding pedophilia. Oh, yeah, it's pretty crazy. She came right out of the gate with it. I mean, I did pull it out of her, but it was a surprise. And that became the, you know, a lot of what we were talking about.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I study a lot about pedophiles because of. I have a Law and Order SVU podcast, but.

[B]

You have a Law and Order SVU podcast?

[A]

Yeah. So we talk about the. We recap the episode, then we do a deep dive on the true crime of the podcast and then we try to get an actor from the episode.

[B]

Oh, right. Because they do the reenactment type things.

[A]

Yeah. I would say like 70 plus percent are real crimes.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Or like a mix of a few crimes and. Yeah.

[B]

What's been your favorite crime?

[A]

Not favorite. We like haunting. Like the ones that have haunted me the most.

[B]

Yeah, I guess that's probably a better word than favorite.

[A]

The. Well, because favorite would be like what if law enforcement really took over? Or like, like in a good way. Because usually they fail. Like there's a cool prosecutor. But I would say the ones that haunt me the most, that like scare me and have changed my being are like trapped in a basement.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Like the Ohio case. Like. Yeah, I'm Colleen Stan and upstate California. Like do you snatched, tortured in a building somewhere?

[B]

Would you prefer basement or attic?

[A]

Attic.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Window.

[B]

Say there's no window. Crawl space up, crawl space down. Which would you prefer?

[A]

I guess at this point it would be basement then. So you could stand up straight. Because crawl space, you might have to be hunched over for longer.

[B]

And also if you were in tornado country, you stand more chance of surviving if you were in the basement.

[A]

Yeah, because if no one. Because I'm like, the more up, the more chances someone can find you.

[B]

Right. So it's six of one, half dozen of the other. Yeah, it's tough.

[A]

Then it's like the Stockholm of it all. And then also like there's cases.

[B]

Stockholm Syndome. Wait, you. So you would. Cuz then you fall in love with your cap.

[A]

You have to. Cuz they're like your only thing for survival. So then you kind of like get. And then the worst is there was a case in like Syracuse area where Whip, he was. He wasn't a murderer, just a torturer. But then when the women went to the cops, they. No one believed them. They were like, you're a drunk, get out of here. And so like women just kept getting kidnapped. Cuz no one was believing the women that were kidnapped.

[B]

So they'd get kidnapped, tortured, then released by. By the guy.

[A]

Yeah, because they were all like sex workers or like drug addicts. And so like he just didn't. Yeah, but he didn't have murder in him.

[B]

Well, that's a kind of a mitigating factor when you go up in front of the judge.

[A]

You know what's about. There was an Alaska one where he would. He would capture them, but then like release them into the woods and then hunt them for fun.

[B]

That does sound fun. You know, I mean it's not like Legoland, the baker, you know, the Baker.

[A]

Of Alaska or something like that.

[B]

The Baker of Alaska.

[A]

He was a baker. So no one believed it. Like a woman escaped, tied up, naked, ran, and they were like. I don't know, was it really this guy? Like they didn't believe her.

[B]

So there's. That seems to be a reoccurring theme to this is nobody is believing the women, even if they appear bound naked and Bruised.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They don't believe them. Like, you and you were up to something. Some hanky panky.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And now you're covering. Yeah.

[A]

Because we know this guy. He wouldn't do that.

[B]

He bakes a mean tart.

[A]

Yeah. And they're like. And you're kind of a whore, Right. Why would he do that? Or. Or they're like, one time, they. Their friend was a suspect. This was Ed Kemper, and they were supposed to search his home, and they.

[B]

Were like, oh, which one's that? Kemper. I've heard of him.

[A]

He. And he, like, killed his, like, grandparents or parents. And then he's an.

[B]

Oh, he's 70.

[A]

Old school.

[B]

California.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Ye.

[A]

As a teen. But then he's so smart that he was able to, like, rehabilitate. And then I remember and he called and was like, I did it. And they were like, oh, Ed. But he had heads in his closet that they, like, didn't search.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Crazy. It's crazy.

[B]

I. I.

[A]

So, like, yesterday, I actually saw a car outside my apartment, and, like, the dudes were sitting there. So when I went home, I didn't turn on any of my lights, so they couldn't see what apartment I was in.

[B]

Because you thought it might be Ed Kemper.

[A]

He's in court. But I thought it was something because I've been writing letters to Luigi in jail. And so part of me thinks that the, like, someone's after me. So, like, I've just been kind of more suspicious and not turning lights on when I get home and stuff.

[B]

That'll. That'll. That'll do it. Not turning your light on.

[A]

Well, that's how they know where. Sure.

[B]

They just wait and. Yeah, they probably have that info already. I'm.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Because I wrote it on the envelope.

[B]

Yeah. They're probably not that there. Probably don't need.

[A]

Well, or, you know, we turn on a light, but this is who I've become now. Or, like, I had an Uber driver that I just, like, didn't like the vibe. And he said, I'll see you later. Didn't like that. So I went to the bodega. I went. Remember me? Wave to the camera. You know, I go missing.

[B]

So this thing has truly affected your ability to. It sounds like you're more paranoid. You're.

[A]

No.

[B]

Your ability to rationalize.

[A]

No. I caught my building super climbing through my bedroom window. And I lived in Hell's Kitchen. And so, like. And I got attacked outside of my apartment. So I have been attacked out and about. I think. I know I'M like. But I'm more like.

[B]

But I'm guessing the attack was random.

[A]

No. Is my building super the same guy.

[B]

Who was trying to get in your.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

What is it with you and building supers? You need to.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

What do you mean what do I mean? You just mentioned two terrible incidences with different building supers. One was crawling through your window.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The other attacked you.

[A]

Oh, attack was random. Just outside that apartment.

[B]

That's what he just asked you.

[A]

Oh yeah, random. It was my birthday. It was like a random.

[B]

Listen up. But I just asked you that.

[A]

But I thought we were still talking about the building super. Yeah, the street attack was random.

[B]

Yeah. So. So you're.

[A]

I do jokes about all this in my special.

[B]

Fantastic. What's the name of your special? Let's plug it right.

[A]

Owl.

[B]

That's why you're here.

[A]

Night Owl.

[B]

Night Owl and. And what's it on Netflix? Oh, fantastic. How much do they pay you?

[A]

Brand name. You know how it is. The license deals. Oh, you don't. You're pro. Yeah, you're probably.

[B]

No, I don't. They wait. Netflix gives you a lump sum and that's it. Right.

[A]

But you pay for the production with that fee. So I like. So I put all my money into my production.

[B]

I understand. I got. Yeah, I got you. So they're giving you a lump sum. How are you? Yes, understood.

[A]

Yeah. So then I paid like I hired everyone I thought was that I want. I really wanted to work with.

[B]

No wonder they're a fucking trillion dollar business. I mean that is, that's. That is the pay to play writ large. If you macroed it. I mean that is really. Yeah, you know, sure, we'll put you on. Here's X amount of money. This can cover your production costs. And you know, and I think you made the wise choice to put the money into production on camera. But I'm sure there's some who don't, you know, and then that's it. Then they own it. They own it. Right, or you own it.

[A]

They own it for two or three years and then they can either give you more money to own it long term or you get it back and you own it.

[B]

Oh, that's great.

[A]

And then you could put it on.

[B]

That's different than when I was. When they were. And I were starting out, you know, as an entity. Yeah. Oh, that's good.

[A]

That's much better. So there's like long term ownership and basically, you know, it's just the brand name. So like more people can See it. Or when people out and about go, where can I find you? It feels cool.

[B]

Yeah. To say the thing, I'm one of 752,000 shows available on Netflix.

[A]

Yeah. But my friend has, like, a TV show out now and, like, seeing us on the menu, you know, it's like these little moments feel cool. You have a. You're in a new movie that's on there. It's not new, but it's new on Netflix. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, new on Netflix.

[A]

New on Netflix. You hurt my feelings.

[B]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[A]

I was. I actually watched two movies you were in this weekend randomly.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Men in Black, and you hurt my feelings.

[B]

You hurt my feelings.

[A]

But I saw that in the movie theater. I'm obsessed with Nicole.

[B]

Oh, she's great.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She. I. I.

[A]

Friends with Money is on Netflix now, too. Her other movie that I love.

[B]

Which one is Friends with Money?

[A]

Jennifer Aniston, Joan Cusack, Catherine keener and Frances McDormand. And Jennifer Aniston's amazing.

[B]

I think I missed that one.

[A]

And her friends are rich.

[B]

I love that. Oh, yes. I know what you're talking about. You know what I learned? I shouldn't say learned. You know what I was told to me yesterday that I had no idea about Chris is smiling because they know what I'm about to bring up. And I'm going to say there's a. There's a rumor that this person felt strongly about because she knew the source. It felt they were impeachable.

[A]

But, yeah, we've all heard it.

[B]

I had not heard it.

[A]

Yeah. You're not gossiping.

[B]

I'm not gossiping.

[A]

You're not out and about gossiping.

[B]

But Barack Obama and Jennifer Aniston.

[A]

Yeah, I get. I mean, because of House of Cards, I get like, you know, how all.

[B]

Of that could work, but I'm sorry it took you. House of Cards to know people cheat.

[A]

No, I guess jfk, but, yeah.

[B]

He's the only guy. He's the only one.

[A]

No, in terms of, like, work like that, you have to keep it together. But then you could do other stuff. I don't know. TV helps me understand things.

[B]

Yeah. I think it's giving you a skewed version of a lot of things. My. My question or my.

[A]

I'm just hoping Michelle's getting it in, too, with someone.

[B]

Apparently her bodyguard.

[A]

Oh. Cause I heard a different rumor, and it's a comedian. And I was like, come on. But we'll see.

[B]

Is it not as hot as Eric Andiston?

[A]

No. I would love if Eric Andre was Fucking Michelle Obama.

[B]

That would be awesome.

[A]

Because I bet he has good sex.

[B]

I would imagine.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

He's freaky. What? So who? A comedian?

[A]

Yeah. They're married. I don't want to, but yeah. This is crazy rumors.

[B]

So my, my. What was so surprising to me was how two people who are so famous, so recognizable all over the world could do this and not have somebody take a picture or anything like that. That's what's so shocking. Like, the amount of people. And the person who told me this is like, yeah, they probably pay people off. But the line, I mean, from hotel, anybody at a hotel, every single employee would have to be paid off. Every single hotel. Drivers, people on the street. You know what I mean? People at a restaurant, or is it.

[A]

Like they get dropped off in the back of the hotel, they go into the kitchen.

[B]

All of that, then all the kitchen.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, at some point, I think.

[A]

About Taylor Swift, because Taylor Swift says the most surprising in an interview. She goes, it's surprising because all my friends, I tell them everything and nothing ever gets out. So maybe when you're like that, she.

[B]

Probably has very good taste and is pretty judicious in picking her friends, you.

[A]

Know, but, you know, her stuff gets under wraps. Like when she makes videos or the surprise drops, or like Beyonce when she, like, did lemonade. Like, there's ways to. Is it NDAs? Is it just NDAs?

[B]

But my point is there would literally be.

[A]

But it's Secret Service. Like, are you really gonna fuck with Obama like that?

[B]

Well, it's not about fucking with him. It's about observing something, noticing that was weird.

[A]

But. But we're all talking about it. So someone has been talking, right?

[B]

But it's. To me, it's still unsubstantiated. And that's why I don't.

[A]

I actually told you something yesterday. I go the way people are talking about this. I don't know why people are not more nervous. I'm like. And I can't believe now I'm talking about it.

[B]

Why? What would make you nervous?

[A]

I don't want to be in their business, Honestly, I don't wanna fuck with Obamas.

[B]

But you're not. You're just. All you're doing is repeating something. You.

[A]

Because it is like, who would they be fucking? Like, it makes sense to me.

[B]

I mean, maybe a younger Jennifer Aniston, but now, no, thank you. You can do better Obama.

[A]

I get the sentiment. I've never seen her in person, but I heard she is, like, breathtaking and I want to see her in person.

[B]

I mean, she cleans up nice. Yeah, yeah, sure.

[A]

I'm excited.

[B]

I worked with her for one day for 24 hours.

[A]

What thing?

[B]

On a thing called the 24 Hour Plays, which is a fundraiser and it's. It's really cool. It's great. I've done it a bunch of times. And it basically on a dark night at the. I can't remember which theater, it's the, like American Airlines Theater or something. I don't know what the other word is, but a bunch of actors, writers and directors get together in this big space, huge space. And there are these little, you know, the actors have to bring a prop. They have to bring an item of clothing and describe. And you put it in the pile, you say who you are and what you what. And also something you've never done on stage that you'd like to. And. And then, you know, it's. That's a fairly long process, but it's fun. And. And then after all this happens. Oh, and it starts, I want to say, at like 9 or 8 o'clock in the evening. Believe it'll be 8 o'clock, 24 hours. All right. So everybody gathers, usually goes on for a couple hours. And then the actors leave and the writers. And I've done both. I've done the acting part and the writing part, both a number of times. Then the writers get together and they kind of. You barter, in a sense, for your cast, right? And you're like, I want to get like Chris Rock and Cecily Strong and Rosie, you know, whoever. And then you find Frozen.

[A]

Perez has been on svu.

[B]

Okay. And. Well, literally hasn't every single fucking human been on that shit. How long has the show run?

[A]

It's season 26 right now.

[B]

That's ridiculous. Still.

[A]

Good.

[B]

And SVU stands for special Victims Unit. Yeah. Okay, and what makes the. Is it Special Victims? Like, meaning like Special Olympics Special or what is the special part?

[A]

Yeah, more sensitive, like especially heinous. So it's like sex crimes, children and women.

[B]

God, why are people watching this?

[A]

There's a lot of theories.

[B]

Tell me one.

[A]

Well, I want. I have a bad habit of interrupting, but I am still curious.

[B]

I interrupted myself. That's okay. I'll get back to it. All right, I will get back to you in a second. So. So then actors go home, writers pick their cast directors. You know who the director is assigned to that. The writer stays there and writes a roughly anywhere from like 5 to 10 minute play. And you go down and you see the set and you're like, here's what we're working with. Because sometimes it's a period piece, sometimes it's very stark. You know, it depends on whatever show is in there at the time you write your piece.

[A]

And so it's not always comedy.

[B]

No, I think it's. My observation and opinion is that anybody. And it's happened a couple times. If you try to make it too poignant or dramatic, it does not work. It just doesn't work. And especially if you're going up and. And so there's six plays. And if you go up and. And you follow two really funny things with. And then you try and. Because you've had what, roughly nine hours to write a play because you turn it in in the morning and then the writers go home and sleep. And then actors are in at, I think it's like 7:30 in the morning, 8 in the morning. Actors come in, you get your scripts, you meet your director, everybody gathers, and then you put that play up. You just rehearse and rehearse and rehearse and rehearse and rehearse and try to memorize, do your best, shape the play and go in. And at 8:00, you know, the house opens at like 7, 8:00, everybody comes in and you do. And it's a benefit and it's. It always raises lots and lots of money and. And then you put the show up and it's pretty crazy. It's pretty thrilling in that, you know, actor, creative way. And. And it's fun. It's really a fun thing. And you get to meet and hang out with, like, really cool people. You're like, holy shit, I'm working with, you know, this person and that person. And it's fun.

[A]

Yeah. Well, I know you wanted to be done with this, but with a Jen Aniston thing, I'm a stoner and she's kind of a stoner hero. And so I, I like imagining her and Obama smoking weed, having fun.

[B]

So you're saying stoners, the.

[A]

The sexy stoner, She's a hero.

[B]

Yeah. So stoners have like, kind of. They're the bar for heroism. And being a hero is very, very low for stoners.

[A]

Be like, yeah, just be like, so.

[B]

Their heroes are celebrities who get high for me, not people who like, you know, ran into a burning building and saved a.

[A]

It's a separate thing. But you don't want someone that's running into a burning building to be high unless, you know, why. Not, not. Not.

[B]

What are you saying about high people?

[A]

Not a Professional. I wouldn't want a firefighter doing that. But I think if he was good. But if I'm stoned, I've saved people before.

[B]

Wait, but if. Let me get the tenses right. But if I'm stoned. Yeah, Meaning if you are in presently stone, you've saved lives.

[A]

I have. Yes.

[B]

But if I'm stoned, I've saved lives. No, no, but you said. But if I'm stoned, I've saved lives.

[A]

Yeah, so I'm saying.

[B]

Now listen to me, say it. If I'm stoned, I'm an immigrant. I've saved lives. How does that sound?

[A]

I'm stoned.

[B]

Are you stoned right now?

[A]

No.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I wish.

[B]

You can get high.

[A]

No, I didn't bring any. I gotta get rid of this cough.

[B]

Chris, do you have any?

[A]

You got weird. I'll fuckin smoke it. No, I have some in my coat and purse. Always. All right, but I gave the Heimlich to someone that was choking while I was high and I saved their lives.

[B]

Okay, that's good. Hence, if you're high, you've saved lives.

[A]

I just feel like being a stoner, it's always like, I always have guilt or like I should be doing more. And so when you see productive stoners, like a Seth Rogen, that's like a hero type situation that I get Snoop, where it's like, oh, you're on set, you're working, you could be high, you could be productive. Like, you don't have to choose.

[B]

Right. I get that. Well, I mean, and she's working out like Jennifer and Snoop.

[A]

All Snoop's out now, but, oh, he.

[B]

Doesn'T get high anymore.

[A]

No, once you're at the inauguration, you're not part of my blunt dream rotation.

[B]

Oh, wait, Snoop was at Trump's inauguration?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Get out of here.

[A]

And Nelly. Snoop and fucking Nelly.

[B]

Well, Nelly doesn't surprise me, but Chanel.

[A]

Monae called him out to his face at a Grammy after party and there's a video of it and it's just like, could she get any hotter?

[B]

But yeah, she's one of the hottest human beings alive if you ask me. Oh, yeah, Janelle, Monique. Jeez, I did. Yeah, she's great.

[A]

But Snoop was in my dream Blunt Rotation, but no more.

[B]

Yeah, I didn't. I didn't know that.

[A]

It was devastating. He's like a true hero. I'm like.

[B]

But he's also a businessman and he's a.

[A]

How much more do you need?

[B]

Oh, I'm totally with that. That's what I Think when I see those Capital One credit card ads, I'm like, jesus Christ, how much more money do you need?

[A]

I don't get it.

[B]

What's in your wallet? Yeah, check, please.

[A]

But that's like one day of work. Like, whatever, but, like, to go on. But it doesn't affect them. Like, there was a comic who did the, you know, convention, and now there's other comics that are cool and successful on posters with that guy. And I'm like, for what? Like, I don't know. It's weird.

[B]

Yeah, I. I mean, it's gonna get weirder. Yeah, certainly. And as it's gonna be harder and.

[A]

Harder to, like, speak up, and I.

[B]

No, it's not.

[A]

I hope not. I mean, I'm. I'm. I want to be punk rock.

[B]

You just do it. You do it. You speak up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it. It's. I mean, the. You're gonna face more anger and people feeling emboldened by. By being really shitty and potentially violent.

[A]

But I don't like the normal. The chill of it. You're not embarrassed to be on a poster with this guy who did that at the fucking convention? I'm like, well, I mean, but that.

[B]

Tells you everything about that person.

[A]

I know.

[B]

And now you know. Now you know, like, oh, you're not really worth my time, you know, if that's how you. If. If that's how you value. And you know.

[A]

Well, because the part is sometimes I'm like, if you're fudgeing, broke as fuck. I get it.

[B]

I still don't get it.

[A]

I don't. But I could.

[B]

I still.

[A]

But if. To have. To have so much and still not have any kind of ethics to do with that is weird to me. But.

[B]

But then sometimes I wonder how informed are these folks? Like, are they. Are they. Maybe they're not getting their.

[A]

Well, my big thing now is I'm not even that smart. And how did I predict it all? That's why I'm shocked. I want to know how dumb everyone is.

[B]

Well, I.

[A]

Because I don't consider my. I'm not really reading. Like, I'm not out and about, and I've. I fucking. I saw all of it. So I'm just like, what's going on in our world?

[B]

Well, it's. I'll. I'll give you this little anecdote. So please, when. You know, I've been touring, touring, touring, touring, and I started this last current tour in September, early September. And my wife is politically active and active in the feminist world and women's rights. And things like that. And we live in Brooklyn, New York, and we live in a little bubble. And she went down to canvas for Harris in Atlanta, which is also a bubble. I grew up there and I know, you know, it's very progressive and I mean, there's still pockets of like, you know, conservative right wing Christian folks, but mostly it's, it's blue, but it's in a red state, a very red state. And, and she, with her experience in Brooklyn and Atlanta shortly before the election, was, you know, very positive and optimistic and, you know, I think it's going to work out. And she, you know, listens to the daily podcast and reads the Times and stuff like that. I'm like, I'm telling you, it's not. I'm out here. I'm, I'm driving between Kent, Ohio and Columbus, Ohio, driving through that whole area. I'm going to Spokane. I'm driving into eastern Washington state. I'm dry. It's not going to happen. You're wrong. I think that's.

[A]

No, I was with your wife. My best friend booked a hotel for the inauguration and then lost a lot of money. Like pre election.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, I knew I, and I had the same thing. The first Trump election where my wife was feeling really good. She was at the convention with Hillary, she's acquaintance of Hillary's. And I told her about three or four days before the election was like, I don't think it's going to happen. You know, and the stuff I'm reading is different than the stuff she's reading. And I was like, I don't have a good feeling. So both times I was like, he's going to be elected or he's going to be reelected. And the tenor of, you can't call it a conversation, but when you go out and see what folks are thinking, how they're acting. And I told her also, it's not just that there are nine Trump signs for every Harris sign. When you're out there going through western Tennessee or wherever you are, it's the tenor of these, the signs you have like, Harris walls, you know, we're not going back or save democracy. Some bullshit stupid thing that doesn't resonate. And then the Trump signs, way over half of them, let's say two thirds of them are, fuck Biden, Trump is. And Trump drawn as like a superhero with like Rambo with his shirt and, you know, Trump ditched the hoe and, you know, and just like really angry vitriolic and big, big old signs, like, so a flag on A sign on another flag and like, you know, way people, you know, 10 of them on. On somebody's lawn and they're just like, you know, that hoe Joe Biden, you know, you know, try, you know, whatever. And. And it's just different. Like you're dealing with a different thing.

[A]

And they're all gonna suffer. And that's the only silver lining I have. Well, their lives will get worse too.

[B]

I. I don't think. I don't think that's a positive. No. Because if you're. This is not to say and dismiss their suffering now. Because it's not like the Democrats, you know.

[A]

No, my thing is crazy Democrat. Like, where, like, why can't we get crazy? Why aren't we at the Capitol? Like, I don't get.

[B]

Well, don't put me. I'm not. I'm not a Democrat. I mean, I vote. I vote Democrat every time, but I am not. I think they're. Well, it's foolish, backwards weak. Well, that's what they're just, they're in the power. They're.

[A]

That's what's shocking to me. They like hate Biden so much. Right. This whole time. And I'm like, like he's barely done it. You've gotten everything you've wanted. Like, well, yes, abortions gone. Like he's done nothing we've ever wanted. So I don't get why they're even that mad.

[B]

He's like, Biden did a lot of things. They're just not aware of them. And they're, They're. There is a. You cannot discount how the, the effect of constant a bombardment. Basically everything is. If it's Fox News, Fox News and certain podcasts and that's all they're hearing, then they're either not hearing about the positives because fucking Biden and the Democrats didn't do a good job of letting people know, hey, we got this economy out. What we inherited and where we are now, we have the strongest employment record of all in history. We. We have lowered. Inflate all these stuff that we inherited because of COVID et cetera, et cetera. They did a terrible job getting that information out there and trying to get past the fucking noise machine of Fox News and Newsmax and Oann and, you know, the Washington examiner and Sinclair News syndicates and of Joe Rogan and whoever.

[A]

Yeah, they.

[B]

They can't combat that. They did. No, they did terrible job of that. And that's why. So that's why I don't, I don't find any silver Lining in. Yes, they're going to suffer. And Republicans have consistently, for generations voted against their own self interest. A lot of the reason is because of culture war. This, this, this time it was trans and it works. Before that it's gay people and it works.

[A]

It fucking works.

[B]

So if, if you know that and I know that and I imagine a lot of my listeners know that, then the, the issue is the Democrats don't. And they, they are in the tiniest little dumbbell because they keep trying to.

[A]

Play with them like I don't get it. The civility games. I don't care.

[B]

Well, this thing about I'm gonna put out a press release and negate this clearly illegal. I mean there was a fucking coup. And also Trump is just a figurehead. He's president, but in name only. It's fucking musk that is doing is calling all the shots I'd never seen.

[A]

Don'T look up And I watched it for the first time like last week and I just can't believe that movie predicted it all so well too well.

[B]

It didn't predict anything. It was, for me, it is the.

[A]

Rich guy, like a rich guy being like, hey, President, do what I want.

[B]

That's been, that's been happening. I didn't predict shit, but not in.

[A]

Such a like easy, what is it palatable way. Like I just understood stuff. It helped me understand stuff that's about v. Succession. It just helps me understand.

[B]

All of your education is through tv, podcasts and movies.

[A]

Not podcasts. Definitely movies. But yeah, like taking things that are confusing and making them like simple and funny. Yeah, it helps me.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It helps me like. Oh yeah, it does.

[B]

So you're much, you know, although on the other end of the spectrum, much like these other folks is you're getting your clarity, your education, your understanding of things through the Jew run Hollywood liberal machine.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

No, I would say everything I like learned, I learned majoring in sociology. And then that's kind of kept me through like in terms of my school, I like dropped out a lot. I went to three different schools, but I ended up graduating from a small school in the city. In Chicago.

[B]

Yeah. But I love Chicago. Me too. It's a, it's a great city.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, movies help me for sure understand stuff.

[B]

But you understand, I'm. I'm drawing a correlation between media.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Well, well, that was a joke. But about your understanding of things is through a very similar yet different idealistic is through entertainment and through things that you get like that's your.

[A]

Yeah. Because I mean, stories.

[B]

And that's what they're. And that's what they're.

[A]

But that's what storytelling is, right? Storytelling is like. Well, not all of it. Sometimes it's just for fun, but it's like.

[B]

Like, I think a lot of times.

[A]

Right now there's a whole thing on Tick Tock where it's like, reading fiction is stupid.

[B]

What?

[A]

There's like a whole thing now on, like, book talk and stuff where it's like, whoa, your book's about dragons? What did you even learn? And it's like. Well, no, that's. The whole point is like, you take real life things and you put them in stories to like.

[B]

So it's making people dumber. All the things you're mentioning. Tick Tock. I am not on TikTok.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I don't know. And I'm. I'm. The more I hear about it, the more I'm. I'm. I'm kind of proud that I'm not on TikTok and I don't want my kid on TikTok. And it sounds like it's making people dumber.

[A]

It is.

[B]

And that's. That's saying a lot because we're pretty dumb right now.

[A]

We're so dumb. You know, when I look, this is. This is not from TV and movies. I was doing a show in Brooklyn and these two girls came to talk to.

[B]

I know Brooklyn from Brooklyn, 911 or Brooklyn. What's the name of the TV show? Brooklyn. Brooklyn. 9.

[A]

9.

[B]

Wait, Brooklyn from the Spike Lee movies? I know Brooklyn. Yeah, I mean, I live there and I have eyes and ears. But no, I know Brooklyn. Yes, Brooklyn Decker, the model. Brooklyn from the kid, the soccer dude.

[A]

I didn't think you would know about Brooklyn Decker the model. That's kind of fun.

[B]

It really is a reference I didn't.

[A]

Think throw out there. No. But a woman came up to me, she was from the South. I forgot. What's like a Virginia, West Virginia, Carolina type area? And her job is.

[B]

You've just mentioned a third of the South.

[A]

Yes, well, but it's like the south, you know, it's like. So that area. I don't remember.

[B]

West Virginia, Virginia are not the southeast.

[A]

What is it?

[B]

It's like central, Mid, Mid, Mid North, South.

[A]

So her job is remote, but she works for like Medicare and Medicaid and people that like, get the money. She calls and just goes, hey, like, how are things? How's it going? And just checks in on all the people that are Using Medicaid. And she said, for what?

[B]

What purpose?

[A]

To help them. So, like, did you get to this doctor's appointment? Are you taking your pill? Like, just kind of like helping them.

[B]

Checking in. Checking in, yeah.

[A]

And she said she called one of her, you know, clients, patients, I don't know. And the woman goes, oh, so her husband has diabetes, he has like foot issues. And she goes, oh, yeah, you won't believe it. We woke up this morning and there was a rat nibbling on his toe. Oh, you didn't think it was gonna go there. And that's the way, like some people are living. Like there was a rat nibbling the toe.

[B]

That's not just the south, but.

[A]

Yeah, no, it's, it's not. That's just where she was from, you know.

[B]

Well, they're about to, you know, Elon Musk put in six people to just graduated high school.

[A]

The teens, the broccoli haired teens.

[B]

And they're going in. They've got access to everyone's. And I mean everyone.

[A]

No, my, my heart is beating so fast right now.

[B]

Their medical history there. And they, they now control these six people, two of them teenagers. Whether or not people are gonna get Medicaid or Medicare or Social Security checks.

[A]

And they don't think that they should.

[B]

You know, when, remember when we elected to do that.

[A]

You're reading the book. So let me ask you this. The government used to do inside jobs and kill people, right? What's going on?

[B]

Still do.

[A]

But why aren't they killing this guy? Who, you know, like, like, is everyone like the cif? Everyone is like, we're in. We want to do this too. Like, why is there not any sort of counter thing or are things happening that I don't see? Like, why are the teens not being thrown out and put in? Like, well, it's just the, that's because. Because he's rich.

[B]

No, because Donald Trump, the first thing he did was got rid of the people that worked at the Justice Department and now they're his people. That's how this whole thing starts.

[A]

That's how you throw it out. There's no one in the inside that's gonna counter any of it. Like, it's all up to us.

[B]

With an assassination attempt? I don't think so. Also, they will benefit the whole thing. Trump got what he wanted. He's not gonna go to jail. He's got money and he's got, he's gonna build shit in China. Elon Musk is getting what he wants. He has government contracts. Sorry. He has Contracts to build things in China. That has all been eased. He's going to, you know, and so.

[A]

It'S important to get rid of our comforts and get in there. Like there's no. That's it. I mean, we're at the final straw. We need to get pitchforks. Like, what do we do? Like, what do we do?

[B]

Look, it's a good question. Valid.

[A]

I don't, the movies haven't taken me this far.

[B]

You have to wait until Adam McKay writes a movie.

[A]

Wait, can we talk about a movie that I do like, really like that you're in? I hope you don't hate it. It's a disaster.

[B]

Oh, I love that movie.

[A]

Okay. I watch it all the time.

[B]

Oh, it's great. I really enjoyed that movie. I, I, it was one of those things. I've had a couple of these two that I can think of. One was Arrested Development. The other was It's a, it's a Disaster where I had with Arrested. I just moved to New York, which I've been trying to do forever. And I was like, I'm not going back to la and, but the project was worthwhile enough to do that. The with It's a disaster. I just, I think I'd gotten off tour something. It was like, I'm not, I'm taking, I'm taking a month off. I work really hard, you know, and you know when you're just, the travel is just fucking kills you and, and I'm friends with America Ferreira who's in the movie and she like, hey, I've got this script and it's super low budget indie thing. I'm gonna do it. I want you to take a look. I was like, oh man, I don't, I just got off tour. I just want to hang out. I don't. And the script was so good. And you know when you're starting from that place where the script is good and you know that kind of it's going to be ensemble and you're going to be free to riff and stuff like that and you're working with really cool people. I was like, all right. So I had to do it. And I went to LA during record breaking Heat Wave. And you do.

[A]

You guys filmed in a Heat Wave dude.

[B]

So listen, so the house we shot at, for those of you who haven't seen it all takes place in a house or in the garage or two scenes in a garage. The rest of it is all in this house. And we shot again, zero budget. We didn't have trailers, nothing. Right. So It. When in the scene where the. I can't remember his name, it's the neighbor, Hank, or whoever's the neighbor comes in. So it's a disaster that's unfolding. It's unclear what it is. We just know like dirty bombs or something went up. And everybody's stuck in this house. And it's. It's taking place during a brunch, couple's brunch, where everyone's got a weird up. It make a great play.

[A]

You know, it would make a great play. And there's just the. A lot of flip sons.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. But let me. Let me finish this. So the scene where the neighbor who's in the Hazmat suit completely taped up, and he's like, hey. And they have this weird interaction because he wasn't invited to brunch and he's. You know, he thought they were friends. So he shoots that scene, right? And it's a pretty quick scene. It's at the door and he comes in. Then he leaves and refuses to give him some help because they were shitty to him, wouldn't invite him to brunch. And it was so hot. Todd Berger is the name of the. He was the writer, director, and he just played this little cameo. He plays the guy when he took off after shooting the scene. I don't know, you know, four or five times, a couple different angles, whatever. It was so crazy hot. He took off his gloves and literally poured sweat, like poor, like a comic, comically, like a good cup of sweat from each thing into this. It was so disgusting. And it's supposed to be fall, so my character has a sweater on and it was just constantly dripping wet. Cause they didn't really have ac. They had one of those, like, portable unit things.

[A]

It was loud. So you can't really do AC right when you film.

[B]

No, it was. It was so hot and awful and la la hot, which is the worst. Yeah, you know, H. It was. It was. But a really, really fun movie to make. I'm still friends with everybody and I made. There was another movie that some of the same guys did. And I did a cameo on that. And this is great. I really enjoyed the movie. It was fun to shoot and it holds up. It's good.

[A]

It is good. Because I don't love dystopia, but I like it when there's a sense of humor to it.

[B]

Well, that's the thing. You never see any blood or guts all taking place outside the house. You hear sirens and things like that occasionally, but.

[A]

And just the idea of the final. Whatever's happening, you're just with these weirdos in this brunt. It's the. That's like, not frenemies, but it's not your closest.

[B]

It's also really smart about how they divide it up. So the couple that's having the brunch is going to get divorced. There's the couple that is, you know, has an open relationship. There's the couple that are clearly having, you know, are at odds from the very beginning, not trying to cover it up. It's uncomfortable. They're sniping at each other. And then there's the couple I'm in, which is I'm a first date of Julia Stiles. And it turns out I'm a little, you know, something is revealed at the end that if you go back, you can see the. Oh, that's why he's like this. But it was fun. Yeah.

[A]

I did my first indie movies that I've ever done this past year, and it was the most fun ever.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I hope I can do more.

[B]

What'd you do?

[A]

Exciting. They were both comedy horrors. One with like a million dollar budget.

[B]

Sounds like you're saying comedy horrors. You're trying to say horror, but you're refusing to horror. Shape the word with consonants.

[A]

Yeah. And then the other was like $100,000 budget. And so it was cool. Yeah. Both were.

[B]

They called.

[A]

Oh, one is damned if you do. And they're. I think they're close to, like finishing that. And then the other one is called. What was it called? I forgot.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And we'll see.

[B]

Well, we'll look at it all in a bar.

[A]

But it was kind of rough. Like you're saying, like, you know, no trailers. And then we had to shoot at a bar from 4am to 4pm because it was a working bar. And I just never. The glitz and glamour, but I. I, like, enjoyed it. And then you had people that were acting a certain way, and I'm like. But they said everything in the contract. I don't know why you're like, yeah, complaining now.

[B]

Like, no, it's a good point.

[A]

Such a weird thing. You knew that it was gonna be this kind of situation. But I also felt like I learned more. I got to, like, ask about again.

[B]

You were on the set of a movie, so that's where you do your learning. Yeah. Movies, tv.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I was raised. I was, like, alone in a basement watching tv. And then me and my parents would watch every Friday.

[B]

You like the being trapped in a.

[A]

No, I just scared. But yeah, we grew up. We don't really communicate as a family, but we went to the movies every Friday. We watched award shows. Like. Yeah. Movies and TV have kind of been.

[B]

Do you have brothers and sisters?

[A]

I have a sister, but she's 10 years older than me, so she moved out of the house when I was like nine. So I have only kid energy.

[B]

Right.

[A]

For sure. And then she grew up mostly in the Soviet Union. I have an. I'm like an American girl.

[B]

And what does she do?

[A]

She was a teacher for a long time. She just quit her job of 15 years last year and is going through a. Like, she got married young, kids really young. So she's like 47, 48 right now with a 21 year old.

[B]

19 and 17. 48, yeah. Holy. So she's from. She's from Genesis. She's from Genesis, the first chapter in the Old Testament. Goodness.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because they lived to be like 940 and, you know, they lived a ripe old age. Those initial first Earth populators, Adam and Eve and Abraham and Isaac and all that.

[A]

I do wish vampires or like something like that was real. Like, I would love to meet someone like, that's been around for a thousand years.

[B]

But you wouldn't really learn anything. You'd have to. Maybe they. If they made a documentary, a biopic, and then you could watch that and then learn about.

[A]

Yeah, that's like. Because I'm looking for love. That's my big. My big thing. And I really want to meet someone that reads way more and knows way more. And then they could tell me about everything, you know, hopefully they can get something else from Laziest.

[B]

It is absolutely lazy. I don't want to read myself. I'd rather find a partner who reads. I'll be watching TV and TikTok and then they can tell me. They could give me a summation, a CliffsNow version.

[A]

I should go to lectures. That's what I should be doing. I should be going. I should be using the resources of New York City and going to these like lectures and events at colleges.

[B]

That's a great idea.

[A]

That's what I should do.

[B]

That's a great idea. And can I put this out there? You might just meet the love of your life.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I should do. I gotta go to like some events. There you go, colleges.

[B]

And then see, and you can start talking to people and they're like, you know, to be honest, I'm only here to meet a partner who reads. And you'd be like, oh, wait, this won't work out. Because then we'd both be, yeah, okay, well, nice to meet you. You go your separate ways.

[A]

Yeah, that's. That's, like, actually the fear. They would probably want a reader as well, but hopefully they can see the smarts that I bring that are different.

[B]

And what are the smarts that you bring?

[A]

I'm just, like, chatting.

[B]

That's not chatting.

[A]

Fine. Making restaurant reservations. Like, I would also get really good gifts for their family when the holidays rolled around.

[B]

How can you walk me through your gift of making a restaurant reservation? Like, what do you do? Start from beginning to end? Take me through Lisa's.

[A]

Well, it depends. Let's say this person that I'm with is like, hey, my friends are coming from out of town. They have these situations. We're going to the Broadway show at this time. We're thinking this, and I'll be like, all right, I got it. And then it's the research, the reviews, asking my few culinary friends. And then I'm also really good at, like, if the reservation. If you have to wake up at Saturday at 7 to make the reservation, like, I could do it. That's it. Or maybe ask a favor. Use my cool connections in the.

[B]

Oh. To get. To get folks into a good restaurant. Yeah, Right.

[A]

Pay for it.

[B]

Oh, that is.

[A]

Make a phone call, put the card down before anyone even gets there. Yeah, I like doing that.

[B]

Smart.

[A]

You like doing that?

[B]

No, I don't dislike it, but I don't really. I. It's not something I really pay that much attention to in the sense of, like, oh, people are coming in, they want to go to this restaurant, which doesn't happen that often, but it happens. And I'll go. So I'll go online, I guess, and then go, hey, is Tuesday at 7:30 good? Do you think I'll yell to my wife or whoever. Yeah, okay. And then I type in. Actually, you don't even have to type because I usually have the calendar. You go, click, and then click, and then. And then you. And then it. Then another.

[A]

Are you diminishing my skills?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

What I'm saying is. No, I'm not diminishing. I'm devaluing them from where you have placed the value you place on that skill set. Making reservations, I'm saying, is not. There's less value than you think there is.

[A]

It depends. I mean, unless you meet someone that can't do it. Too stressed.

[B]

Oh, well, I don't buy into that shit. Yeah. I've hung out with plenty of people who are like, I can't. I have too many emails. Emails. I'm so busy.

[A]

That's me.

[B]

Yeah. I don't like that. I have no patience for it. I. It's not. That's not too busy to do the thing that you're supposed to.

[A]

You don't suffer from being overwhelmed by small tasks.

[B]

I mean, I definitely feel the. The, like, annoyance of, like, God damn it, I have so much to do. And I say that to myself. I don't say that to other people because it's not that true. It's like. Like, I do have things to do, but I can certainly do this thing that you're asking me to do in addition to, you know, whatever it is. But I try to check the. The drama and the hyperbole and exaggeration. I'm not a fan of that stuff.

[A]

What if it's not hyperbole or exaggeration?

[B]

Well, it usually is. And I've tried to check it in my. Like. Like, I. I'm also. And this is annoying, and I understand why it would be, but I'm not a fan of. I'm starving. I don't like that. I don't hate. I'm not gonna yell at you, but I. I just. I have a relationship with language that is probably unnecessarily has more rules to it, and I try not to be. I don't exaggerate. One thing that fucking drives me up the wall is when people exaggerate in a tiny way. And I know they are because I was with them with a thing like, oh, my God, it sucked. And the power was out for, like eight hours and we had to walk five miles. I was like, that's not true. The power's out for, like two hours and it's not even two miles. Like, what. What is it that you think I'm not going to relate to? Why are you exaggerating? It doesn't make me.

[A]

Anyway, they're desperate for the attention, but.

[B]

They'Ve got your attention. They've already got your attention. They're saying this thing. They're not trying to shout above people. We're listening to you tell the story and you are inflating the things in your story. I know tons of people that do that, and I hate it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, wait. And I will. I will say, like, wait, it wasn't. It wasn't five miles. It was like two miles and change. It was like less than half of five miles. And yes, it was. It was definitely raining, but it wasn't. You're Making it sound like there was a hurricane. It wasn't. It's. It's.

[A]

I don't like liars either.

[B]

No, that's a different thing. And I. And I don't like liars.

[A]

I don't fuck with liars. And I've. I just was lied to by. I got. I caught. I caught a friend lying in a. In a fucked up way. And their big thing was like, you're gonna take this and have it color our whole thing When I've done this and this and this, and I do all the. And I go, that's how trust works, babe.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, it doesn't matter if there's been years. All of that is actually crumbled. And I don't trust any of that either now. Like, it was. It was trying to excuse this behavior. And I was like, that. That's just. That's not how it works.

[B]

And what was the. Was the lie like a liar? It was the lie like something that you could. Was like, I was in this place, but they weren't in that place. Or what was. Was the nature of the lie and ended up.

[A]

And then it kept happening. And then I caught them, like, doing even worse stuff. And then it was like, oh, this is who you actually fully are.

[B]

But I'm asking why?

[A]

The first lie. The first lie was crazy. The first lie, I. I'm a flake. And so I forget. So we were hanging out, me and this one friend. I was like, what are you doing tonight? And then she told me, I'm going to the movies with this person. I go, okay. And then I forgot. And I was like, wait, what are you doing tonight? And then she told me. She just. She kept saying it because I kept forgetting. And then after a while, I was like, okay, you're going to the movies with this person. I don't really have plans. Oh, I'm going to message this one couple I know. Let's see if they're free tonight. I text my friend and she goes, oh, I'm going to the movie with my friend who I'm sitting with.

[B]

Oh, well, that's so that all of.

[A]

A sudden she knows I'm texting the person she's actually gonna be hanging out with. Still doesn't say a word. Then I look at her and I go, well, this friend just said that she's going to the movies with you and this other person. And this other person. She goes, oh, yeah. I mean, I, like, forgot. And I. I let it go because I was so.

[B]

That seems like a lie that Means it. There's no basis. There's no reason for it.

[A]

Yes. Which makes me think, what else is she doing? Right? So I ended up hanging out with my friend's husband instead that, like, ended up going to the movies with that group. And the next day I came, I went to my friend. I'm like, do you want to talk about you lying to my face for no reason?

[B]

For no reason.

[A]

And she goes, I wasn't a lie. I was just omitting information. And I go, we're really gonna do that? Speaking of, like, language and what it means, I go, we're not actually gonna fucking do that. I go, if there was an Insta. And she goes, well, I didn't want you to feel left out. I go, but that's not even my vibe. And we're adults. You're allowed to hang out with who you want to. I'm like, I'm allowed to hang out without you, too.

[B]

I'm with you 100% on this.

[A]

And I couldn't believe it. And then it's just, like, for no reason, you lied. And then from that, I. I caught a few other things, and then I caught a lie, and then I caught a. Did you just take the. And then it. And now the whole friendship is ruined.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm like, was that really worth it? Now we don't have a friendship.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because.

[B]

Well, good that you found out. You got enough friends. You don't need somebody who's, like, fabricating weird shit for no reason at all. Yeah, seemingly.

[A]

And I also. Or I would have loved honest, like. Because we all do weird things. Like, humans are strange. I had a friend do something, and if she just went. I was feeling insecure because of this and this.

[B]

You'd respect that more.

[A]

Yes. I felt in the moment. I couldn't believe I was lying. I couldn't even, like, go backwards to save it, because I was too far in, and I was embarrassed. I would go, thank you for at least diving into your human emotions. Like, we all up and do things that aren't right.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

But that bothered me, too. Just like, the. Like, bending around to convince me that it was okay. Bothered me.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm with you 100%, because that's.

[A]

Yeah. When you get.

[B]

All right, Lisa, is it time?

[A]

I feel like this has been no Senses. I thought you were gonna ask me, like, my favorite smells and touches.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Instead, we just talked about how I don't read, how I'm scared of the government.

[B]

That was. And that there's nothing initially they asked me to come up with a hook, which took me a little while, and then I did. And then I came up with such.

[A]

A good hook for Headgum. And I had a podcast for a year, but then they canceled it. No one listened to it. But listen to how good the concept was. Was. Yeah, it's called. It was called Enemies.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And I would have people on that don't like me or I don't like them. And it was going to be a conflict. Punk.

[B]

Oh, I like that. I like that idea.

[A]

Guess who doesn't want to come on my podcast? People that don't like me.

[B]

Right. There's. There's the catch. 22.

[A]

People that I fight, people I have long draw standing dramas with. And so then it had to like move around and like. It was.

[B]

I like that idea though.

[A]

Yeah. To actually like discuss the things that.

[B]

Did you see the three episode with. The one with Dane Cook is just the itchy butthole. But it's like a brilliant thing that he did that it actually is legit. Like Dane, he. I mean, it was a real thing, but it became fictionalized, but also non fiction. It's really so cool and clever and unique. And that was an awesome episode.

[A]

Yeah, it was a good show. There was so many really great episodes.

[B]

There's a. There's a great book that I. I know you don't read, but I. Maybe you can get it in audible. The. That is fascinating about kind of. Kind of in a tertiary way about what we're talking about. But it's called Anatomy of a Fact and they turned it into a play. I don't think the play was successful, but it is one of the most fascinating books. And I read the article that is referenced. So it's all about the exchanges between a guy who wrote an article. I can't remember what it was for, maybe Rolling Stone, but it was about a suicide at the Stratosphere in Las Vegas.

[A]

I've jumped off that.

[B]

You're alive. Yeah, you jumped off it, but you're alive.

[A]

I just can't believe I was there when. Where this book is happening.

[B]

Well, the article. So I wrote an article and it's. Takes place in it. It's. The article is great too. And it's. It delves into like the people in the suburbs of Las Vegas and this mining thing in Midtown that and this kid basically, who committed suicide by jumping off the stratosphere. So this guy wrote the article, had to submit it for. Go through the general process of editing and stuff for whoever. What I say Rolling Stone. I'm not sure who it was. Maybe it was, you know, New Yorker, I don't know. And the editor is doing fact checking, just doing his job, and he's asking. And I've written articles, so I'm familiar with, like, just making sure that this happened and just looking to substantiate because he's working for the, you know, people who are publishing this article and they want him to get their facts straight. And he is writing back like, no, this didn't exactly happen. I took. Took poetic, you know, artistic license to say it was, you know, and, and initially it's like just kind of, you know, this minutiae. Like the hallway wasn't three, you know, the room he was in wasn't 16 by 10. And the guy's like, who gives a. You know, whatever. And he's like, well, this, this is my job. And. And then it just escalates from there. And the writer and the, and the editor and at various times, you, you will flip your allegiance. You'll be like, yeah, he's got a good point. And then about the other guy. No, he's got a good point. And then he just goes. And it's a, it's a, it's a quick read. It's like, it's not very long. It's maybe, I don't know, 120 pages. But it's fascinating. It's so good. And you really do, at the end of it, like, I don't know whose side I'm on, you know. Cool. It's great. It's really great. Yeah. Anatomy of Effect.

[A]

But also like, as a writer, you know, that they have to fact check everything. They could be sued.

[B]

Yeah, no, it's what I'm telling you. It's. It. You will. I believe that you will go back and forth with like, it's like. Did you ever see the Staircase? The documentary?

[A]

No.

[B]

Okay. It's great. Yeah. But there are things where you're like, oh, he did it. No, he didn't do it. Oh, he did do it. No, he didn't do it. Do it. You know. All right, Lisa, I have to stop talking because I have to do a show in a matter of hours. Here is my. I end good every podcast with a question from my 7 year old daughter.

[A]

Cute.

[B]

Who said the other day, that. Or not the other day, but over Thanksgiving. I can't remember why she said this, but she said pumpkin pie is good for your voice. And I'm not sure that's.

[A]

I bet it's because it's Smooth. I'm with her.

[B]

Yeah. I'm not sure, but. So here's the question, and this is a pretty simple one. And here we go. Ready? Liza Trager. Am I pronouncing that correctly? Okay. How do you fart?

[A]

How do I fart in the mornings?

[B]

How far? H o w. How do you fart? Not when do you fart? How do you fart? How is different than when I don't.

[A]

Oh, my God. I can't believe I'm being stumped by your child. How?

[B]

And I don't know.

[A]

Easily. Is that how? No, that's. That's how much. That's how.

[B]

Well, I mean, it could be. I don't. I. I try not to chime in. I'm just. That's the question. You answ it. And we'll look at that.

[A]

How am I farting? By constantly eating things that I know make me upset. So that's how I'm constantly farting.

[B]

Yeah. That's not the question.

[A]

Isn't that not it?

[B]

The question is how do you fart? Let's put emphasis on how do you fart? How about that? We'll. We'll put that emphasis on you. How do you fart?

[A]

Loudly.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Is that answering it?

[B]

I mean, in a sense. I mean, you're.

[A]

I hate poop humor, too. Like, I'm actually so uncomfortable right now.

[B]

I don't even know if it's funny. Funny to her.

[A]

I think it's a legit. I'm like, not into poop stuff. It's, like, really hard. I talk about come a lot. Like piss. I can talk about lots of up murder. For some reason, like, poop stuff makes me really uncomfortable.

[B]

That's because you're not German.

[A]

Oh, the. The germ. Oh, like to, like, sexually.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you want to hear a up fact?

[B]

Sure.

[A]

So there's this famous dominatrix and sex worker, and she was on a podcast and she was saying when she's in dominatri and trigger warning, people get upset when I tell them this. For people listening.

[B]

But she said, I don't think my audience is gonna.

[A]

Basically, she said it's always better when the client eats their shit because then it doesn't smell. The worst is when they leave it because then you have to smell it the whole time.

[B]

Yeah. I'm so sorry. I just came. I just came in my pants. I'm gonna have to call this clean up, run down to Old Navy, get some new. All right. Lisa Trager special, Night Owl.

[A]

Thank you so much for having me.

[B]

Netflix. I think we're done.

[A]

Oh, you are done.

[B]

Sense is Working Overtime is a Headgum podcast created and hosted by me, David Cross. The show is edited by Katie Skelton and engineered by Nicole Lyons with supervising producer Emma Foley. Thanks to Demi Druchin for our show Art and Mark Rivers for our theme song. For more podcasts by headgum, visit headgum.com or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and maybe we'll read it on a future episode. I'm not gonna do that. Thanks for listening.

[A]

That was a Headgum podcast.