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David Cross
This is a headgun podcast. Audible ignites your next action packed adventure with thrills of every kind. On your command, dive into the Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides. A psychological thriller that will keep you guessing until the very end. Masterfully narrated by Jack Hawkins and Louise Freely. From electrifying suspense and daring quests to spine tingling horror and romance and far off realms, unleash your adventurous side with gripping titles. Discover exclusive Audible originals, hotly anticipated new releases and must listen bestsellers that hook you from the first minute. Because Audible knows there's no greater thrill than the one that speaks to you. Discover what lies beyond the edge of your seat. Start your free 30 day trial at audible.com wonderypod that's audible.com wondery pod.
Sam Morril
Jesus Church.
David Cross
Oh, take your.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I mean, whatever. What's.
David Cross
You tell me.
Sam Morril
I don't care.
David Cross
What goes well with your bodega cast company.
Sam Morril
I'll see you. Okay, let's.
David Cross
Let's throw this out there, right?
Sam Morril
Yeah, sure.
David Cross
Everybody sees it. Is this available for purchase?
Sam Morril
Yeah, you can get it. We're at. We're at the Comedy Cellar, which is like cool. It's cool. And play comedy. We're the strip house, the steakhouse. Really good steakhouse. I think we're at Luger's now. I think we just got in at Luger's. We've. It's literally.
David Cross
It's really smart.
Sam Morril
It's fun. Well, it's. We played all these strip mall comedy clubs for like 15 years and we were like, hey, would you guys want. And now we're just getting hit up like the Comedy Store.
David Cross
Just.
Sam Morril
I was like, I don't even think I'm passing the Comedy Store. And they, they hit us up. They have that weird hierarchy thing that's.
David Cross
In great part why it's so smart.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's fun. But we are. We have not even come close to making our money back. But that's all right.
David Cross
But I mean it's an investment.
Sam Morril
Investment is an investment.
David Cross
And.
Sam Morril
But yeah, we don't know anything. So we just. It's one of the things you just have to like listen to. You have to listen to people. It's just weird to be. And then I found out all these other comics have liquors. I didn't, I didn't even like Ron White has a tequila. Bird and Tom have a vodka. But that was after us. But they at least didn't go whiskey because of us. They knew we had a liquor. So I was like, all right. Brendan Schaub, he's not really A comic, but he has a. This is like 90 bucks a bottle. Which I was like, are you a fucking psycho? You're just.
David Cross
How much is this a bottle?
Sam Morril
Like 40 bucks or 45 bucks.
David Cross
Good value. Yeah, Assuming it's good.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's good.
David Cross
How long is it? Oh, over three years in new charred American oak barrels. 90 proof, non chill filtered. Is that a good thing?
Sam Morril
I actually don't know. I'm an idiot.
David Cross
I don't know.
Sam Morril
I don't know what non chill filter means. It sounds good.
David Cross
Here, let me audition for your. You know that feeling when you see a sleepy bodega cat lounging on a bag of chips or yesterday's paper? Just makes you smile. We want a sip of our whiskey to do the same. Bodega Cat straight Y rye whiskey. We can clean that up.
Sam Morril
Improvising that for a second. I forgot that's on the bottle. I was like, damn, you're good.
David Cross
Is crafted to match the spirit of New York City's very own bodega cats. Unpretentious, fun, and a little mischievous. So here's to the New York bodega cat, A staple of the city. And who knows, maybe one day bodega cat whiskey will be your staple too. Mark and Sam. Government warning, according to the surgeon general.
Sam Morril
We'll leave that part out. The other stuff's good. Yeah. You have a good voice for that study.
David Cross
Thank you.
Sam Morril
That's pretty good.
David Cross
Distilled in Indiana.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
What the fuck?
Sam Morril
A lot of whiskey, a lot of whiskey. Indiana, it's a big whiskey state. Good bang for your butt.
David Cross
What about New York? What about upstate Catskills?
Sam Morril
It's so expensive to do anything in New York.
David Cross
Oh, wow.
Sam Morril
Yeah. Anything in New York.
David Cross
I see where your priorities are.
Sam Morril
Jersey. We could do Jersey. New York is a. Is a pain in the ass. Anything in New York is a pain in the ass.
David Cross
Now, what about all the. I know that there are a bunch of distilleries up, like, where I'm. I'm around upstate.
Sam Morril
Is that where you live? Upstate? I.
David Cross
Both. I'm here in Brooklyn. I mean, I. I've had a place up there for 17 years, but it used to be there all the time. But now that my daughter's in school, we're up there less. But actually, when we're done with this, my wife's grabbed my daughter out of school early. We're heading up there for a long weekend.
Sam Morril
Nice.
David Cross
Which will be nice. Yeah.
Sam Morril
Yeah. What do you do up there?
David Cross
I mean, different things mostly. Like, not a whole lot and a Lot of like, kind of like, like, if you can see, this is from last week. My hands are kind of cut up. Lots of little, Little cuts here and there. Gardening. This was. I was taking the. These really strong. I don't know what they're called, but they're almost like bamboo. These weeds that grow like eight, nine feet tall. Right. And they have the little plume at the end and. And I was getting rid of those things and they just slice your hands up and, you know, pull up, trying to pull them from the root, but getting rid of that. And then. I love chopping wood. It's. I know it sounds like you love.
Sam Morril
Chopping wood in your outfit. This is like.
David Cross
I. I mean, I don't know. I. I've really come to enjoy it.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And. And, you know, just. I. I mean, I have finished a couple projects up there before my daughter was born to just go up there and write, sit on the porch. It's in the middle, like, in the woods, in the middle of nowhere, tiny, teeny, tiny town. And my wife has finished projects, writing stuff up there, and it's really good for that. And I shot a movie up there, and damn, it's. It's great. And I have a lot of friends there, and it's beautiful. It's cheap. You know, in that relative sense, like when you say upstate New York, people immediately think of Hudson Valley, right?
Sam Morril
No, I don't. But. Yeah.
David Cross
Well, what do you. When people say upstate, are you thinking like upper.
Sam Morril
I think like. I'm thinking like Buffalo, Rochester.
David Cross
Well, what do they. They call that. Yeah, there's upstate and downstate, I guess, because they refer to us as downstate.
Sam Morril
Do they? Yeah, I guess I haven't hung around enough. I've never.
David Cross
I mean, you're right, it is that. That is upstate. But when people like myself who live in the city and go, oh, I'm going upstate for the weekend, I mean, 9, 99% of the time, they're assuming it's, you know, what are those little.
Sam Morril
Towns in Valley's, like an hour? It's not even, like, really far, right?
David Cross
No, no. Yeah, it's right there. That's right. It's straight. Straight shot. You can take the train or you can drive up.
Sam Morril
And it's kind of bougie now, too, right?
David Cross
It's super bougie. It's beautiful. But it's also really expensive.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And where I am is just as beautiful and less than half the cost of living. And it's got its, you know, you know, influx of gay guys from the city who've turned little pockets and are like, oh, there's actually.
Sam Morril
That'll turn up property value too. The gays come in, you're looking at a nice little flip at some point.
David Cross
Yeah, yeah, dude, they got a gallery all of a sudden. Overpriced candles and all that kind of bullshit.
Sam Morril
I love an overpriced candle.
David Cross
And this. This will be a Bodake cat straight. Right. I guarantee you there will be a place you can. I'm gonna do this for you. I'm going up there. I'm gonna go into Narrowsburg, which has changed. Drama.
Sam Morril
I have friends that go into the local liquor stores and they're like, you don't have bodega cat. And they're just like, what do you like? Clearly, you know this guy. You're an asshole.
David Cross
That's what I used to do with. My wife is a writer, amongst other things, and has written a bunch of books. And specifically, she's got like four books of poetry. And in poetry is something I always get a little angry. Like, I understand if you don't have a book in the fiction section, there's a gabillion books, right, that are. That are, you know, worthwhile. But honestly, how many poetry books are worthwhile? Not that many.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I mean, I don't. I don't. I'm not up to date on my poetry, honestly. I don't know poetry well.
David Cross
But I go. I go in, I'm like, hey, do you have a. Do you have Dark Sparkler by Amber Tamblyn? Like, no. How come? Because I see these 80 poetry, but I don't even know who these fucking people. And then I would get angry and I'll light a fire in their. And I'll go back behind where the dumpster is and light a fire there. And then I'll come back around and I'll go. And I'll be through the window, right? And I'll be like, TikTok, motherfucker, you got about 60 seconds to get that fire out. And they're like, what? You heard me. And then they'll say.
Sam Morril
And then they're like, all right, fine, we'll carry your poetry book.
David Cross
No, they didn't hear me because it's through the glass. And so then we have like a five minute exchange about, I know you heard me. And they're like, I can't. I can't tell. And it seems like we're having a conversation, but they're just saying, I can't hear you. And I'm continuing it from my End. But there's a wall of glass. By this time, the fire's gone. Somebody else has called the fire department.
Sam Morril
Damn. It's spreading.
David Cross
It's spreading. Yeah, because there's a. There's a fertility clinic next door. Yeah. And then there's a hobby house.
Sam Morril
Damn. Now you are. Now you are the guy. You look like you're the terrorist.
David Cross
I beg your pardon?
Sam Morril
Oh, I'm sorry.
David Cross
Do I look like a terrorist?
Sam Morril
Oh, no, just the beard. You look like I could. Yeah, you look like you either could be the most sensitive man or the most dangerous man. I can't tell.
David Cross
Who's to say those are mutually exclusive? Sam.
Sam Morril
No, you.
David Cross
Come on.
Sam Morril
But you. I mean, you're saying the woods. I'm thinking Ted Kaczynski. I don't know. But you're married.
David Cross
I am married. And Ted was not married.
Sam Morril
No. Unmarried.
David Cross
If only. If only they had AI sex partners back then.
Sam Morril
I think that would have been stopping him.
David Cross
I think that would have stopped.
Sam Morril
I don't know.
David Cross
I think that would have stopped a lot. Are you kidding? I'm like, hurry up, speed this up. Sex robots. Half of these incels will be. They're not gonna be taking women out.
Sam Morril
I don't know. But. But that's. It's basically just jacking off.
David Cross
Yeah, but I think they're. I think if. I think they would be like the mind you need.
Sam Morril
It needs to be like almost like the.
David Cross
I'm talking about like the new ones that are come, you know, that they'll have at the. The CES convention. You see them and it's always like the lead story when, you know, ABC News does like, well, the. The 38th annual, you know, Consumer Electronics show in Las Vegas. And it's always a. They'll get to the roombas, but the first thing they do is the sex robots. It's always Japan. Japan is at the forefront leading the way.
Sam Morril
Yeah, Japan is crushing it, huh? They love their sex robots. I mean, we got. We had a sponsor for a minute. We didn't have them, but like called the Vacu Glide. I don't know if you've heard of this.
David Cross
No. Is it like a Fleshlight?
Sam Morril
It's like a $1,000 dick sucking device. It's like a really high end one. And we, we were like. I was like. Because our producer was like, really proud. He was like, I got us vacuum glider. We're like, we don't know what that is. And that's probably good. We don't know. And then I looked it up. I was like, holy shit. But. And Mark and I were like, this will be cool. But then they only sent one and we're like, all right, you take it. I guess. I don't. We're not gonna, like, fight over it. So we just gave it to our producer.
David Cross
I can't believe you guys are that homophobic that you can't.
Sam Morril
That we can't go back to back.
David Cross
Go back to back. I mean, clean it out.
Sam Morril
I don't think it's homophobic. I think it just felt weird. I think it was just like. I don't know. I don't.
David Cross
Yeah, it feels weird because it's homophobic.
Sam Morril
You think so? Yes, but I've done.
David Cross
I mean, I don't mean. I don't mean I. That's a. I've always problem with the word homophobic because it sounds like you're scared of gay people, and that's not.
Sam Morril
I think there's more germs than homophobia. But you're right.
David Cross
Nice try. It's germs.
Sam Morril
All right. I hate gay people. Jesus. Yeah, no, we. No.
David Cross
Are you Jewish?
Sam Morril
I am Jewish.
David Cross
So you circumcised?
Sam Morril
I am.
David Cross
Okay. Is Mark.
Sam Morril
Mark pretends to be Jewish. He's not Jewish.
David Cross
But is he circumcised?
Sam Morril
I actually don't know.
David Cross
Now's your golden moment.
Sam Morril
I'm gonna text him because this way.
David Cross
There'S less to worry about, germ wise. That's where I was going.
Sam Morril
That's a good point. Yeah. Well, also, I mean, look, I used to jack off with other kids in like seventh grade when we were like.
David Cross
On other kids?
Sam Morril
No, with other kids in the room. You never did that? I think that was like a city thing.
David Cross
A circle jerk.
Sam Morril
Circle jerk?
David Cross
Are you fucking out of your mind? You think that was just in the city? I bet that's more country. Really? Oh, fuck yeah, dude.
Sam Morril
But it's worse in the city because there's less space. It was like, worse to do because we were, like, cramped doing it.
David Cross
Yes.
Sam Morril
Like pillows played a big role.
David Cross
That would. That would. Yeah. If you're in a closet with a couple other guys jerking off, doing a circle jerk.
Sam Morril
Yeah, but we know we did the circle jerks. We did it all the time because it was like, you know.
David Cross
But wait, and what about the. I know there was a thing. Was it an animal or some. There was a thing about the cracker that.
Sam Morril
No, we didn't.
David Cross
Was that a real thing?
Sam Morril
Not for us. I mean, I think it must have come from somewhere, but. Yeah, I think that I never frat. Life was so not appealing to me. I mean, I'm here. When I was in school, I went there for the free booze during, like, the rush. And then I was like, oh, I'm not. I remember they. They were like, one of the frats. They were like, of course. The most racist frat was courting me the hardest. They were, like, in trouble for doing blackface in New Orleans. And they were like, with our first selection, you. I'm like, oh, great. I'm. I'm glad. I'm glad that you got. And they tried to intimidate me into joining. They were like. They circled me. They didn't jerk on me. They circled, but they had the fists out, kind of clenching, being like, are you joining or not? And I was like, is that guy. I just said, is that guy gonna hit me? And he was like, no. But I was like, it looks like.
David Cross
What school is this?
Sam Morril
Tulane.
David Cross
Why'd you go to Tulane?
Sam Morril
I don't know. I think. I just want. I think everyone was like, you gotta get out of the city. And then.
David Cross
I love New Orleans, but Tulane is.
Sam Morril
It's not. I love New Orleans. It's one of my favorite cities. But, yeah, it was not. And also.
David Cross
Wait, Mark's from there?
Sam Morril
Yeah, Mark's from there. We didn't know each other, though, but I knew, like, other New Orleans comics. I was doing open mics, and then.
David Cross
So you know Sean.
Sam Morril
I didn't know Sean then. He had just left for New York, so. But I had gone right as Katrina hit. So I came back anyway.
David Cross
Oh, boy.
Sam Morril
Yeah, that was weird.
David Cross
I'm gonna. I'm sorry to keep interrupting and take. But do you remember it? It's. It was on a. Kind of a main road, and there was a bar that was a railroad car. Is that. And it was by Tulane.
Sam Morril
I don't. Oh, no, I don't know the name.
David Cross
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Sam Morril
No.
David Cross
Okay.
Sam Morril
I don't know. The railroad.
David Cross
Of course, you wouldn't know the name.
Sam Morril
No, I'm thinking. I thought I visualized it for a sec, but no, it's not okay. There's so many good bars in New Orleans.
David Cross
Yeah, it's just off. It's like, before you get into the city, like, where Tulane kind of is.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it was getting shady by the time I went back for a little bit, and it was getting kind of shady. Like, the one night I didn't go out with my buddies. They got held up at gunpoint. And one of my friends was like, he's like, kind of a badass. He was like, fuck you to the guys, and they were like, jeez. And then they just, like, captured the other friend.
David Cross
He was hammered.
Sam Morril
He just, like, went away.
David Cross
Right?
Sam Morril
But, yeah, New Orleans got really. I mean, it's still shady. You could be in, like, the nicest part of New Orleans. You'd be in, like, St. Charles, and some dude with a gun will just, like, walk up to it. It's crazy.
David Cross
It's so odd because to. To me, New Orleans is, like, one of the best cities in. In easily one of the worst states in the country, if not the worst, as far as that.
Sam Morril
That whole area.
David Cross
Unhealthy, poor, dumb.
Sam Morril
You know, that whole area of states is, like, kind of. It's dicey. I mean, the nice parts are nice, and then there's everywhere else, but I.
David Cross
Got way off track, so I don't even know what we were.
Sam Morril
It was older rod riders, circle jerk, New Orleans, open mics, Sean Padden, Mark Nor. I love Sean.
David Cross
No, no, that's. That was. Going forward. I mean, going backwards to. You were into. Oh, the guy frats. And the guy was going to. I never liked, Tried to intimidate you into joining.
Sam Morril
He was weird. And then I remember there was the other frat there that they were like, I guess, like the badass frat, like, the crazy frat. And they. I just saw them on the second I left. They were like, on cnn. They were like, they're in. They're in hot water. And I was like, they poured boiling water on some kid's face.
David Cross
Yeah, and then the.
Sam Morril
But it was a good pun they came up with.
David Cross
That's pretty good. That's very New York Post.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's very New York Post. Y. But they dumped water on some kid and, like, disfigured him.
David Cross
I don't know what boiling water will do.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's.
David Cross
And what was that? Just part of the. Hey, welcome to the team.
Sam Morril
I don't get. I don't get hazing. It. It didn't appeal to me. I'm like, I don't want some. I don't even like this guy. I'm gonna let this guy abuse me.
David Cross
Yo. I don't. I mean, it's way, way, way beyond me. Like, and also the whole thing about, you know, you're our. It's just a bunch of dudes, and we're all super secret friends, and we have super secrets, and it's just so kind of childish and weird, but also, it's like, you've.
Sam Morril
You abused months and Then we're just going to be like brothers now.
David Cross
That's it. Tough love.
Sam Morril
And tough love.
David Cross
That's. That's. I think that's supposed to be baked into the.
Sam Morril
That guy, right?
David Cross
Psychological.
Sam Morril
Best friends.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
Now we're best buds.
David Cross
I would hope so. That sounds like a happy ending.
Sam Morril
In the time it takes you to actually board that flight from Group 8.
David Cross
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Sam Morril
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David Cross
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Sam Morril
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David Cross
Now boarding, groups one through seven. So close.
Sam Morril
Visit HyundaiUSA.com or call 562-314-4603 for more details. Limited availability pick up through participating Hyundai dealer in select markets. Yeah, no, it's. The culture of it was really abusive. I didn't like it, but I loved, I did love New Orleans, but, you know, I was doing stand up and it was like there was nothing going on. There was like one open mic a week.
David Cross
Yeah. Sean, you know, is a good friend and, you know, opened on tour a couple times and has, you know, is from New Orleans and, you know, talks about how much he loves New Orleans. But the comedy scene is just.
Sam Morril
There's no club either.
David Cross
Also.
Sam Morril
Stand up there is just not. It's one of the things when, like, when your culture is all about music. I feel the same way about Nashville. Honestly. When the culture's all about music, it's kind of like not the best Nashville is.
David Cross
I mean, it's. I remember the last show I did there and I've been going to Nashville off and on for, you know, decades. And it's just unfortunately, I think past the tipping point of it's just exploding and growth. And they've got all those, like the gulch with those. What do you call them? Mixed use. You know, so there's condos and then they have these areas. A lot of cities have them now, but they're just like soulless. Soulless. Yeah, exactly. And, and, and kind of those like corporate chain things that don't look necessarily like a chain, but it is. And it's like. Or a fake British pub. You know, just.
Sam Morril
It's like usually be yourself, be your. Be like the mom and pop. Shit's what I want anyway.
David Cross
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Nashville used to be. I, I have similar feelings about Atlanta too. And, and, and again, I'm. This could just be the old man. Going, you know, it's not as good as it used to be. But I. And I remember telling Nashville, like, look. Or you know, the. The show I did. Like, I'm from Atlanta and I'm telling you, stop. Stop the growth. You. You're losing all your character. And. And what's the main. What's the drag there? You know, the. The thing. The big strip. Broadway, right?
Sam Morril
Oh, yeah. Nashville.
David Cross
Yeah, yeah, Broadway.
Sam Morril
And through all the bachelorette parties. And the buses are. It's a lot.
David Cross
No, they're not buses, though. They're the pedicabs.
Sam Morril
Oh, yeah, they pedal.
David Cross
They.
Sam Morril
Which seems miserable, by the way. Like, why. You're like. You're just pounding beer and pedaling like, what the fuck?
David Cross
It's cheap, man. It's a great way to make money is open up those bachelor. Bachelorette or bachelor party. Yeah. You get the. It's like a little, you know, tiny, like, trolley car thing. It's open and they pump a bunch of stupid music and everybody. Yeah. Gets hammered and pedals their way up and down the street going, woo.
Sam Morril
Yeah. But then, you know, people listen to me. Like, shut up. You live in New York. Like, I remember when that piece of.
David Cross
No, you don't live in Times Square.
Sam Morril
No, no, for sure. Not yet. But one of these days I'm working my way up, dude, I want to live next to that M and M store. That's how you know you.
David Cross
I want to live in the.
Sam Morril
Would be cool, man. You just get. You know, Times Square is terrible, but I remember when there's that pizza place by Stand Up New York on 78th and broader. It was like a classic pizza place, and they just turned into a giant Marshalls. And I was like, oh, fuck. This is. That's one of those. You see little things like that, and little by little, it just kind of breaks your heart. You're like, oh.
David Cross
Oh, yeah. I mean, I have my whole. Where'd you grow up?
Sam Morril
I grew up in Chelsea originally, then Upper East.
David Cross
Okay. Yeah. So I. My pretty much all my experience was downtown, you know, like, very. And I remember when there was a Gap on St. Mark's and that was a big deal back in the 80s.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And then Cashmere on Avenue B in 7th.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
What the. Good luck with that. You know? And then little by little by little by little, and then the next thing you know, there's a Kmart in Astroplate. That was a big one, you know, And I mean, just like all kinds of, you know, and the cube's gone and there's Another.
Sam Morril
I always think of Todd Berry's joke about that Kmart, where he's like, down with Kmart, and there's stuff people can afford. He's like, we want a vintage clothing store here where you sell Kmart shirts for $80.
David Cross
Right, right. No, it's true. I mean, I went to Kmart a bunch.
Sam Morril
I liked it. Yeah, but I know what you mean. I know what. I get that. Like. But now we're at the point now with, like, Amazon, that I go into a Walgreens and I feel like I'm helping the little guy. You know? That's what I mean. Like, with Amazon, they get you. That's how they get you. I mean, so I'm, like, happy to see a Barnes and Noble.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
You know, isn't that fucked up?
David Cross
Yeah, absolutely.
Sam Morril
Like, this is a. This is a chain. And now you're like, oh, shit. People still have. There's still bookstores.
David Cross
That's a really good point, too. And I. And I do try to support independent bookstores wherever I go.
Sam Morril
And, you know, Strand is like the classic New York.
David Cross
I'm in Brooklyn, so I go to Green. What's it called? It's on Fulton. Greenlight. And it's great. And. And. But there's not a whole lot. There's one on Vanderbilt that's kind of specialty books that. I mean.
Sam Morril
But when you're on the road or something and you find one of those cool, like, indie bookstores, that's, like, the spot. I love that.
David Cross
Oh, and go. Like Tattered Cover and Prairie Lights and.
Sam Morril
City Lights and City Lights in San Francisco.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And, yeah, I mean, there's some great. There's a great one in Denver where they took an old post office building from the 1800s. Beautiful, beautiful. That kind of, you know, large, huge stone kind of building. And. And the whole thing is a bookstore. And they have a. Like, I'd say a third of the first floor is this reading area where they have, I don't know, 12 couches. Huge. Huge. And you just go grab a book off the shelf and they're cool with it and go sit and read. You don't even have to buy it.
Sam Morril
Yeah. Like, how the hell do these places make any money?
David Cross
I. You know what? I think it's supported. I think it's beloved. In. In. I'm guessing this. In. In. And they have a. What do you call it, Antiquarian section upstairs where they have, you know, first editions, and that's pretty cool. And, you know, hand sign, old stuff. And. Have you ever been To Manchester, uk.
Sam Morril
I. I haven't. No.
David Cross
That. One of the coolest places. And I won't talk about it too much because you haven't been there. But it's called John Ryland's Library.
Sam Morril
I almost went there in November, but I was just in too many places.
David Cross
If you go. It is one of my favorite places on earth. It's a. His. This guy who loved books was an industrialist. 1800s. He died and his wife kind of created this. It's like a cathedral. And it's meant to be like a cathedral, but to books. And they have the coolest fucking. They have, you know, quiet rooms and stuff. And it's beautiful. Beautiful like a church. Like an old cathedral.
Sam Morril
Damn.
David Cross
But filled with all kinds of cool books. I mean, it's great. It's one of my favorite places right in the city.
Sam Morril
I wanted to go there. I just. You know when you do like a Euro trip, my agents just kill me. I had like seven countries in less than two weeks.
David Cross
And I was like, oh, dude, you can't do that. You can't do that.
Sam Morril
You know, the problem is they know. I'll just say, yeah, what? I don't care.
David Cross
No, don't tell the experience.
Sam Morril
I won't do it again.
David Cross
I told them on this last tour. I just got back from Europe like a couple weeks ago.
Sam Morril
Where'd you go?
David Cross
Oslo.
Sam Morril
I love Oslo, dude. Scandinavia is just the coolest.
David Cross
I. I was walking around Oslo. This is a couple weeks ago, a month and change, whatever. Walking around Oslo going, what the fuck am I doing in New York? What am I doing in America? This is insane.
Sam Morril
That's how I felt going around Copenhagen. I was like, I should just live here for like.
David Cross
Copenhagen is awesome. I met a bunch of expats there too. Yeah, randomly. I was there for a couple days and yeah, I mean, the water's clean. Like the. The water that surrounds the city. You. In Oslo, there were people, you know, they have those like little saunas on the boats. Like the TD boat that's only slightly bigger.
Sam Morril
That kind of self care. In Scandinavia, I feel like they're obsessed with like hot.
David Cross
I don't even know if it's like. It's just nice. It's like a luxury.
Sam Morril
Oh, it's luxury. But I feel like they're really into like cold plunging in the water.
David Cross
So they do the sauna, then they're in the. They cold plunge in the water. That's clean. It's like pristine. It's in the city. Same with Stockholm. That water is clean. You can Drink it.
Sam Morril
Those women in Stockholm.
David Cross
Holy shit, Oslo. Here's.
Sam Morril
I said, by the way, I said that to my black friend the other day and he was like, what the fuck is that supposed to mean? I was like, I don't know that.
David Cross
What? What'd you say?
Sam Morril
I just said, man, those women in Stockholm, he's like, cause they're fucking Aryan. That's why you like them. And I was like, well, that's more of like a Jew thing, I think. I think that's.
David Cross
But they. There's. There's been so many immigrants in the last. And it's kind of an issue with them. But there's like, beautiful. It's like Montreal where you're.
Sam Morril
Yes.
David Cross
The most beautiful mixed race and all kinds of, you know.
Sam Morril
Yes. Nice save. Thank you.
David Cross
Exactly. But Oslo is a little less than that. Less of that than Stockholm. But I remember taking the tram. That's another thing. Like. So I'm in Stockholm and Oslo and Berlin and Brussels and. And Copenhagen and all these great places. Every single motherfucking one of them. Every one of them has a train to the airport. That is beautiful. Clean, takes about seven minutes, goes 200 miles an hour. And from the city center, right. Every single one of them has put money into this and it's the most enjoyable thing. And everybody's on there. And that's how you should go to the airport, right? You get on this train that's clean.
Sam Morril
And nice, real options. I mean, JFK is a nightmare. And then you got like that LaGuardia bus is so depressing.
David Cross
I mean, that's. But all. All over America, there's no real.
Sam Morril
Well, Atlanta, that one. Doesn't it.
David Cross
I mean, it's got the marta. Yeah, but that's not the same thing.
Sam Morril
It's not good. Yeah, it's.
David Cross
It's not. I mean, that also is. The regular subway that doesn't have. Isn't. Well, it doesn't serve. You know, it's pain in the ass to get.
Sam Morril
Yeah. I feel like our airports are like third world in America. Like, I was at the Denver airport. I was like, this is a piece of.
David Cross
Really. I like the Denver airport. Why?
Sam Morril
Because it's just. It's just. I also got no fight with a woman there too, because she like went ahead and it's one of those that, like, if it was any other airport, I would have been like, this is fine. But that airport just stresses me out. It's also huge.
David Cross
It's huge. And. And they're still. They're doing all that construction on the.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
One of the sides, so it's kind of up, but still. I like Denver.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
LaGuardia is awesome.
Sam Morril
LaGuardia's amazing.
David Cross
Used to be a piece of shit.
Sam Morril
I know.
David Cross
And LaGuardia is great. The. The only airports I. That are bigger, that I can't stand are lax. Terrible.
Sam Morril
Worst ever.
David Cross
Jfk, JFK is brutal. Atlanta. I know people like it. I don't like it. I don't understand why they like it.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's awful. It's also takes forever. I hate ones that take. This is like just travel this. We're probably putting people to sleep with this shit right here. But like. But the. You know, the. Just getting out of Atlanta is a nightmare.
David Cross
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, it's. It's poorly designed.
Sam Morril
I did a Tour bus for 50 cities this year. I just don't want to deal with flying. I saw one too many plane issues.
David Cross
You know, Especially now.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I know. I was like, oh, yeah, let's shut down. Let's shut down all this.
David Cross
And dude, if I could, I've done a couple tour bus tours and if I could do. If I could afford that, I would happily go back to that. It was so much nicer.
Sam Morril
It was good. It was fun. But it's the second time I've done it and I was like, oh, man. I just like, not. Cause you know, the first night we did. First run, we did a. What do you call a sprinter van at night, and the guy just falls asleep at the wheel and drove us off the fucking road.
David Cross
What?
Sam Morril
I know. Yeah. We would not have been up if we weren't watching a movie.
David Cross
Holy shit.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it was like 3:30 in the morning. He just drove us off the road. It was crazy.
David Cross
What was this?
Sam Morril
I think we were driving from Charlotte to Richmond. I think that was the drive.
David Cross
Right.
Sam Morril
And.
David Cross
So you were on the highway, then you were on 95.
Sam Morril
He drove us right off.
David Cross
Wow.
Sam Morril
It was crazy. And then Gary Veder, who I tour with, is hitting him. He's like, dude, wake up, wake up. Oh, fuck. Sorry.
David Cross
Oh, Jesus.
Sam Morril
So we had to pull over to some rest area and just wait for another car.
David Cross
You got lucky, man.
Sam Morril
I got lucky.
David Cross
Wow.
Sam Morril
Yeah, we were watching the movie the Substance, and we were just like, I'm just not a body horror guy. I don't like. I don't know why I watched it. I was like, I just don't really like this. I liked the first 25 minutes or so. And then I was like, yeah, I get it. And then Gary was like, this movie Fucking sucks. I was like, yeah, we gotta finish it. We started it. So that's the only reason we were awake, right. Is Cause we're like, we should just finish this.
David Cross
Jesus, man.
Sam Morril
You guys gotta write a thank you letter to the substance lady.
David Cross
Yeah, yeah, the substance lady.
Sam Morril
I haven't seen the director.
David Cross
It's a lady.
Sam Morril
Yeah, well, it's. No, it's.
David Cross
They're letting ladies who.
Sam Morril
Demi Moore is the actress. But. No, but it was a woman.
David Cross
They're letting a lady actress direct films.
Sam Morril
I was outraged. That's why I finished it. But I was like, I gotta see how this ends.
David Cross
That's.
Sam Morril
It was crazy backwards. I was shocked. But, you know, it didn't work out. And I think hopefully this will be it.
David Cross
Well, fingers crossed.
Sam Morril
Demi Moore, though, very hot in it.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
I would imagine, like unbelievably hot.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
60 something and naked a lot. And you're like, really pretty good.
David Cross
Yeah. That's not. AI.
Sam Morril
Could be.
David Cross
Could be. Let's get the. Let's. I'll tell you who will know is the. The old vacuum glide.
Sam Morril
Let's get that vacuum.
David Cross
I got a. I got a Fleshlight as a gift from. I finished a show and these two guys were hanging out. This is a while ago, and they're like.
Sam Morril
People used to bake cookies for entertainers. You want this dick sucking thing?
David Cross
I think it was relatively new. I'm not sure how long Fleshlight's been around, but I had heard of it and they gave me a Fleshlight. It was like a special Fleshlight.
Sam Morril
I've never tried one. Still. Was it good?
David Cross
I didn't try it. I should have because Too many times.
Sam Morril
I can't believe I didn't.
David Cross
Wait, this makes no sense. There's no way I would have gotten one. Oh, you know what? Maybe it was when. How do you clean it?
Sam Morril
Do you put it in the dishwasher? Like, what do you do?
David Cross
I think you just. You do a hand soft scrub, hand woolite type thing and then you hang it on the line outside. Can you let nature, you know, you let it, air it out. It's a natural.
Sam Morril
The hand still works for me. I'm good with the hand. I'm not. I have no complaints.
David Cross
I think I would imagine that it would only be extra special and kind of worth it if you could. Not if you didn't have to hold it. Yes, if. Because then your hands are up here, you know, and it's a completely.
Sam Morril
Have you heard of the vacuole? No hand work. You do this.
David Cross
I did not know about that?
Sam Morril
I think it does its own thing.
David Cross
It's the glide part. The glide. So it's like.
Sam Morril
I think I would guess so.
David Cross
I wonder if you can tune it to a UK siren so that it's. As the siren's going.
Sam Morril
Like, you're, like you're looking at porn you shouldn't be looking at. And the cops are showing up quick. I'm in trouble.
David Cross
They're showing up on your dick. That's the thing, that special part. I, I. Well, how does the vacu glide work?
Sam Morril
I don't know, but I think it's like. I think it just. I read a bunch of user reviews.
David Cross
Set it and forget it. Right. It's like.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I think so.
David Cross
I think it's like an instapot.
Sam Morril
Yeah. No, it's. I think it's an instapot. Yeah, it's. I think it's just quick. I've read a bunch of the user reviews.
David Cross
Well, that's probably your own personal experience. I don't know if it's. The quickness is. Is that what they're selling you on?
Sam Morril
Efficiency? You'll come in 30 seconds and you'll.
David Cross
Have the whole data or your money back.
Sam Morril
You'll have the whole data. Yeah. I mean, look, that is. Sometimes you just want to, like, get it over with. I don't know. I feel like I.
David Cross
Sometimes I remember when I was working on this, it was some project, and it was taking me a long time and. Right. It was writing. It was writing this something. And I remember it got to the point where I was like, I'm gonna wake up and I'm just gonna jerk off immediately. So I don't even have that in my head. And I'm not getting distracted. And that's how I would start the day. And then I could sit down and write. I'm not kidding.
Sam Morril
I, I don't think it's a bad idea. I think it's like you're clearing. You're clearing out any bad thoughts.
David Cross
Well, it's not even that. For me, at least it wasn't that so much as just, I won't get horny and distracted and, you know, be on the Internet and see this ad on the. Right. And they get to, you know, like, I'm not gonna click on, you know, she did what to who? You know, whatever. And you just jerk off and get rid of it. That kind of thing. And then you just write, you know.
Sam Morril
Yeah, it's more of a. It's just a distraction. Yeah, let me eliminate distractions.
David Cross
Yeah, exactly.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
Yeah. So, I mean, maybe there's a vacuum glide in my future.
Sam Morril
Maybe you should. I mean, I honestly was.
David Cross
I heard Purim's coming up. Is it? No, no, that's. What's the one in the spring.
Sam Morril
Passover.
David Cross
Passover. You don't really celebrate with vacuum glides and Passover, do you? That's more of a Purim thing.
Sam Morril
Yeah. I feel like in the desert, they just. I wonder how the jerk off situation worked during that 40 years. It probably wasn't great.
David Cross
No. No. Because there's no aloe or lotion. I talk about this in my standup. I talk about Jesus. Jerking off as a teenager and how there wasn't a lot of. There was no, you know, lube or glide or no lotion or any of that stuff.
Sam Morril
It was tough times.
David Cross
It was tough people, but they didn't know it. They were happy with what they had.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
That's okay. What a lull in the conversation.
Sam Morril
I love a lull. I think a lull is real.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
I think people trying to. I think. I think some pods are too obsessed with over talking.
David Cross
I agree. And it's. It's one of the, you know, when. When standups will ask me, like, newer kids coming up and stuff, and be like, do you have any advice? And I'm not Jo. I'm being serious. And you know, the. The obvious one, which is true, is just take whatever set you can.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And just do as many sets as you can and record every set. And then the other one is.
Sam Morril
Is get a vacuum glide now.
David Cross
Get it? Get a vacuum. You know, I know. I know a guy who knows a guy. And. And then the other thing is like, do not. Don't be scared of silence. And it's. It's so important. And I watch comics and. And it's just like, dude, just don't worry about it. I was. I was telling this to. I hope he doesn't mind me saying this. It was a conversation we had. Do you know Steve Fury?
Sam Morril
I know the name.
David Cross
Really funny guy. Great guy. Really, Really. I like him a lot. He's cool, dude. And he was opening for me for a while, and it was something I taught. It was like, just. It's okay. Just take. Take the beat. You don't have to fill that up. And you see all these comics who are good and they're just not comfortable.
Sam Morril
But it's over eager. It's like.
David Cross
I know. I get. I get why.
Sam Morril
No, totally. But. But I mean, I think comics going on first you said he's opening I think going on first, there's this, like, need to. Yes, true. Gary Veder, who opens for me, is so deadpan. He's so. And he does his own thing, too, but he's so quiet that he forces them to come to him. And I love that. I love.
David Cross
Yes. Well, that's part of it.
Sam Morril
And I love that he forces them to listen. Like, I don't love having a super high energy person go on before me, because that's not how I am. So it's just gonna. It's gonna be weird. I've had that before. I remember, like, I had this guy once, just. He was really funny, but it was super high energy. And then I'd come up and I talk like this, and the crowd's like, does this guy even give a shit? Like, what the hell? I'm like, no, this is how I talk, you know? But, yeah, I think the silences are. It's great. I remember seeing Ted Alexandro when I was, like, super young, and he would just kind of sit in the silence in a way. Chappelle would do it, too, like, all the time, in a way where I was like, oh, that's cool. Cause you. Sometimes Chappelle would do it too long, I'd be like, like, all right, let's. I want to hear the bit.
David Cross
You know?
Sam Morril
But I loved hearing. I love being like, okay, what's he gonna say is great at that. Todd Barry's great at that.
David Cross
Oh, yeah, yeah. It's not even about the energy or anything like that. You can see, depending. A person could be deadpan, and still, you see that they've. They're. They're learning this bad habit of, you know, filling everything with a. It's like the comics who go say the joke, and they go, but, you know, I didn't. Yeah. Or. But. Or.
Sam Morril
Anyway.
David Cross
Anyway. Or whatever. It's like, it's okay. You don't need the butt ums. You know?
Sam Morril
Yeah. If a joke doesn't hit, it's kind of like. It's kind of good. Sometimes you're just like, oh, okay. Like, what if you kill every time? You're kind of a hack, right? I mean, if you're not changing up enough, you should be going, how dare.
David Cross
You just say it to my face?
Sam Morril
I just. You know, I love when. I love when some new shit bombs just because I'm like, all right, you know, you want it to hit, but when it bombs, you're like, all right, maybe that's good. Maybe I need that.
David Cross
Yeah. And it also means, like, oh, it's not. It needs work, this idea. Because sometimes I'll know in the back of my head, like, this is kind of a half assed approach to this idea. Totally. And then the audience lets you know, like, yeah, that's a half assed idea or approach to this idea. And then you got to work. I remember I have a thing now that I do. That's all. It's all fine. But when I was, I don't know, the first 10 times I did it and I didn't have this place where it went and I. To me, it was like, you know, it's a little offensive. It's a little button pushy, whatever. And I was in my head, I.
Sam Morril
Was like, your Hitler vacuole, chunky.
David Cross
Oh, that I think is, I mean, that's working. That's clean. That's. I don't swear I keep it clean. I mentioned Jesus in a good way. No, this is the thing about slavery. And seriously. And I had this and I was like, you know, I don't care. You know, a little defiant. Like, it's a good bit. And it's a, you know, but it didn't do well. And I. And sometimes you're like, well, fuck it. I. I know this is a good bit, but enough times I was like, okay, I need to, I need to create a reason why I'm saying this thing that I think is, you know, controversial or whatever. And then I found it eventually. But it made that. The silence made me.
Sam Morril
You made you realize I didn't earn it. Yeah, I didn't earn, like, that's what I mean. There's so many, like, I feel like edgelord comedy is so in right now. And, and you know, a lot of these guys, like, you didn't earn it.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
You just. No one's saying you can't talk about anything totally with. But when you hear a lazy ass approach on a delicate topic, that's why it should be hard.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
And that's why you shouldn't be putting out every, you know, some comics are. I feel like once Louis started doing an hour like that, you were like, everyone started doing that. And not everyone was equipped to do that.
David Cross
You know, few people are.
Sam Morril
Few people are.
David Cross
And.
Sam Morril
And you got to do the road like a motherfucker and you got to hone it. And that's the beauty. Like, you're talking about going to, you know, overseas and stuff. I didn't change anything. I like that. I didn't. You're like, holy shit. At a certain point, performing in Amsterdam it's like performing in Minneapolis, you know, But. Yeah, but I definitely had some. I had some jokes that I was like, I'm not earning this.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
I like a Holocaust joke that I was like, it's not funny enough. It's gotta be a funny. If I'm gonna do this joke, it's gotta be a. That. That was my only thing. I was like, let's do a smart.
David Cross
And immature, you know, approach to it. You know, that's. I don't think a lot of people necessarily have that.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
You know, but that is. It's. It's to. To know that and to feel it and. And that pushes yourself to go, okay, I've got this thing, and it's funny to me, but I'm as you. As you said it so articulately. I haven't earned it. I need to earn it.
Sam Morril
But that's. That is the good thing when people are like. I remember a tell once was like, growing's good. Grown means you're, like, right close to a laugh. And I was like, oh, shit. Like, he. You just see him honing stuff at the cell. I love. I mean, for years I was doing, like, the 12:31am spots. And, like, the only good thing about that was watching Dave Attel, because he would just be just doing crazy shit.
David Cross
He had just gotten up.
Sam Morril
He just woken up.
David Cross
Yeah, just woken up. Got Have a coffee.
Sam Morril
But he was like, you know, every time that. You know. And then on the early shows, you'd see, like, Colin Quinn working out, and he'd have such good topical shit that you're like, that's. That's the right angle on this, you know? But it's.
David Cross
It's interesting when you get jealous of a bit, you know, when you see somebody that you admire and you. And you're like, oh, that's the way to do. It's like, sometimes I'll audition for a part in, like, a. A big movie or something prestigious, and I won't get it. And I'll be like. And I got called back and I met with. And I didn't get it. And I'm like, fuck. I thought I did a good job. They thought I did a good job. And then you go see the movie with the person they cast.
Sam Morril
What's one of those that happened to you?
David Cross
It was. Oh, fuck. It was a Daniel Day Lewis in.
Sam Morril
Games of New York.
David Cross
Yeah. No, it was Darth Vader. No, it was Philip Seymour Hoffman in a. It was a. It was a. It was a. I think a Coen Brothers Movie or shit. He plays like a assistant. It wasn't Big Lebowski, but he plays like it was a movie. Maybe George Clooney was in it.
Sam Morril
Oh, okay.
David Cross
I. I don't remember, but I. I remember, like, getting close, and then, you.
Sam Morril
Know, he's like, one of the best actors ever.
David Cross
But this is even before. But then seeing it, and he did it completely different and going like, oh, that's the way to do it. That's a better way to do it. You know, And. And I've had a couple of those where you don't get it, and. And then you see it and you're like, oh, right. That's the way to do it.
Sam Morril
Cool.
David Cross
You know, But I feel like that with a little bit with comedy, because. Because, you know, there aren't that. That when you think about it, there's not that much subject matter outside of the stuff that is a personal anecdote that hasn't been talked about. But then you see somebody's spin on it or the joke, you're like, oh, shit.
Sam Morril
I feel that way, especially with a premise that's played out. And I'm like, I hear a premise, and I roll my eyes, and then to turn. I'm like, that's what I mean.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
I love. I mean, there's this comic, Jeffrey Asmus, who's a really fun. He has.
David Cross
Say his name again.
Sam Morril
Jeffrey Asmus. And he had this bit, I love, where he's like, so everyone's done this bit about, like, oh, participation trophies, you know, and you even hear that premise, you're like, oh, but his turn was. His grandpa was like, oh, oh, you got a participation trophy. And he's like, yeah, grandpa, you didn't have to compete against black people.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
Like that. I was like, oh, that's the turn.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
Like, it's amazing when you just hear the same bit again and again. But yet, to me, I was like, oh, you figured it out. So I love that. I love. I'm almost like, yeah. I get excited when I see a good comic do a premise that I don't love because I'm like, oh, what's he gonna do with it?
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
You know, And.
David Cross
And again, you get a twist. It's like, there. There you go. That's the way to do. That's a perfect way to approach that subject matter in that joke.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And I think I found. I'm gonna pat myself on the back. But going back to the slavery bit, I think I found. I found it like, oh, that's the. That's the thing that's gonna still piss people off, but in the. In the thing that. The way I do, you know, in part the. When I am putting a bit together, like trying to get the turn that you're not expecting. And then there's a bit of logic to it, even though it makes you feel uncomfortable, but it's like. So I like that. Yeah.
Sam Morril
Yeah. I love the. I love just like the discomfort, man. I. I love. I mean, that's like, what got me into standup is like, I remember seeing like Chris Rock specials and stuff and just being like, oh, shit. He'll just like, he will talk about sitting in discomfort. Like, I love that. You know, I mean, you could. You did that too. I mean, I remember. Yeah, I mean, I remember listening to like the Pride is Back young comic being like, oh, shit, this is cool. This is how you do it.
David Cross
Well, yeah, there was.
Sam Morril
The first time I met you, I told you. Oh, man, I listen to you all the time growing up, and you were like, fuck you, you're making me feel old or something. You said something like that.
David Cross
Oh, I wouldn't say.
Sam Morril
You said, you Jew boy. And I was like, what?
David Cross
That sounds like me.
Sam Morril
I was like, that's weird. No, I know. You're like, oh, man, I feel old now. You said something like that.
David Cross
Yeah, right? Yeah. It wasn't gracious. No, it's a. It's, you know, I'm. There are a number of people who have legitimate, you know, like, you know, Cross is an asshole because I just was not comfortable taking a compliment. But I do appreciate it and especially from, you know, somebody like yourself who I think is extremely funny and. And who I like watching. There are.
Sam Morril
Oh, thanks.
David Cross
That many. What?
Sam Morril
I said thank you.
David Cross
What?
Sam Morril
I said thank you.
David Cross
You. What the. Is that you?
Sam Morril
Jesus.
David Cross
Is your. Is your. Because it's not in stand up. But is your identity New York Jewish? Do you feel that?
Sam Morril
Do you just New York Jew comedian, probably. Yeah.
David Cross
I don't like, like, when you go travel and you.
Sam Morril
Yeah. You feel more when you travel. I don't really feel it as much. New Yorkers. I'm just a New Yorker. But yeah, when you travel a little bit, it's. It. I can feel how many Jews are in the crowd by how certain jokes perform. Like, I had this new joke about, like, how I saw a headline that there's a rise in antisemitism, and I clicked on it and there was a paywall and I was like, know your audience, you know, and it didn't really. It kills in New York. But then someone will take it to, like, a place. I'm like, oh, I think that hits harder with Jews.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
The same way that if you do, like, a black joke, you want black people in the crowd.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
You want them to be laughing.
David Cross
Otherwise, it's weird.
Sam Morril
It's really weird. It won't work. Like, that joke's not going to work in Naples, Florida.
David Cross
You hope it doesn't work.
Sam Morril
Yeah. You hope. Not exactly. Like, yeah, I can feel that. So, no, I think when you feel it more in other cities, but then also, like, look, everyone's tribal in a weird way. Like, look, I love everyone to some.
David Cross
Degree, but I'm not.
Sam Morril
But you people will, like, grab you. Like, we'll be like, I'll get, like, a dm. Like, we have a Jewish deli here. Would you come at. You know what I mean?
David Cross
So would you come by for an hour? We come by and work the machine, work the slicer.
Sam Morril
Will you slice the pastrami?
David Cross
Show us how they do it in New York.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
Bodega man.
Sam Morril
But, yeah, I love. I love touring, man. Like, I really, like. I really do like it. I feel like I have the itch when I'm at home. I'm just like, oh, I love it.
David Cross
I mean, I'm about done. I'm. I taped the special next week.
Sam Morril
Where'd you. Where'd you tape?
David Cross
Athens.
Sam Morril
Nice.
David Cross
40 watt. Yeah. Georgia. Not.
Sam Morril
No, I figured.
David Cross
Make sure you clarify that.
Sam Morril
I warmed up in Santorini, and then I taped in. Yeah. Athens.
David Cross
And have you played the 40 watt?
Sam Morril
I haven't, no.
David Cross
It's great. And then I, you know, I'll have a few more sets here and there.
Sam Morril
But where do you build up? You're going to build up in, like, in. In the city and then you take it out. Or are you the type of person that needs, like, 45 minutes to tour, or will you just hit a club on the road or something and then just be like, I'll work out here?
David Cross
No, no, I. What I've been doing, and I'm. I understand how lucky I am to be able to do this. It's what I've done for the past four tours, four sets. You know, I do this thing called shooting the shit, seeing what sticks. And I'll go to Union hall in Brooklyn, and I'll do the first. I want to say six to eight sets is just scraps of paper. I tape everything. I have special guests. So I. Because I don't have the material yet, I have a couple things in my back pocket because When I start the tour, by the time I get to, you know, show number 60, it's. It's quite a bit different. You know, I've rift. I do all my writing on.
Sam Morril
So you're opening with stuff that just didn't make the special, right?
David Cross
Yeah, I have that in my back pocket that I know is going to work and can fit. I mean, I have bits in this. This current tour that were bits that I cut out of the last thing I dropped. And I. I have stuff that I've dropped in this tour that I go. And it's always stuff like, oh, I can work on this. I can add to this. This will be better. The whole thing from my last special about killing Jesus Christ is. Was a line that I riffed in the special before that that I probably ripped it, like five shows before I shot the special. And so I had it. And then I had this little idea and it got a laugh and everything, but I cut it because I was like, I can work on this. This can be a whole bit. And it was. It was my closer and the last and the worst daddy in the world special. And so I have things, right, that I cut from that that I can work on. And. But so I'll go and do like six, seven, eight of those shows, and then I'll move to Littlefield, you know, which is bigger. And now I've only got one guest, and I'm doing, you know, mostly either the. It's one. One set. Let's say it's like 30 minutes. Like, one set is just working on stuff, and the other set is like, okay, I think this is getting there. And let's. Let's. These are almost ready to go. Yes. And then eventually I get to the point where I'll go to the Bell House, you know, and these are all places I can walk to or ride my bike.
Sam Morril
Yes.
David Cross
You know, and. And I'll. And that has. That's when I'm just doing the set. And I'll do, you know, two, three of those. So I start at Union Hall. 99 seats in the basement, couple guests, special guests, and just working. It's raw. And I. And one of the cool things about it, I mean, it really works in a practical. Practical sense for me. But also I have fans who will come to three shows and then go see the set when I do it in the theater in New York, you know, and so, like the process. They like the process. And. And they'll come up to me after the thing, you know, it's like, yeah, I Saw you work this out at Littlefield. It was pretty cool. Because that one bit you did, it wasn't anything like that. I was like, yeah, you know, and it's totally works for me. It's fun and it's. And it's. You know, it takes three to five months I'd say before I'm pretty good. It's pretty good. I mean but I'll, you know, I'm doing it twice a week.
Sam Morril
You know, I'm always curious how people do because I remember Anthony Jeselnik once told me he's like, I don't tour until I have like an hour. Like I don't.
David Cross
Oh, I don't. I don't go out till I have at least an hour. Hour and 25. I'd be sorry. An hour and 15.
Sam Morril
I'm so the opposite. I'll go out with like, like 30. I'll go and I'll just try to figure it out on the. Because I, I want.
David Cross
Why do you want that pressure?
Sam Morril
Because if I do a bunch of club shows and I bill it as working out, I will just leave with more material. I. It's the only way.
David Cross
Oh, I see what you're doing. You're doing kind of a similar thing.
Sam Morril
Similar thing but like at a club maybe.
David Cross
You know, and like I get it.
Sam Morril
And I, I love that cuz. You know, cuz maybe I'll come back to that city at the end of the. And it'll be totally different.
David Cross
Yeah, exactly.
Sam Morril
Exactly. But no, no, I'm doing a similar thing to you.
David Cross
Yeah, I like that. And it's, it's. I never been able to sit down and write jokes. You know, I can't go to the coffee shop.
Sam Morril
You have some bits that are pretty like. I mean you must have some. Where you're like. The line just forms in your brain. You're like, oh, that's it. But I just have to add to it.
David Cross
Yeah, I guess.
Sam Morril
Yeah. But then some people I don't know the hell like, like, you know, like Jim Jeffries will have like a 25 minute story. I'm like, how the hell do you. I don't even know how you do that. You know, I don't even know how.
David Cross
Well that's also from tell. I mean I have like. I have these different bits and, and I, I. One thing, for better or worse, quite, you know, sometimes both at the same time. I don't, I have a thing about exaggeration and lying. I just don't do it. I. If it's a weird personality Thing I have. I don't like. It bothers me when people. And I know they're doing it and they're not even aware. It's like, oh, yeah. And then, you know. And then we had to walk three miles in the rain. It was like. It wasn't three miles. It was a mile and a half.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
It's still a lot to walk in the rain. But why did you act? You know what I mean? Like, that thing is all weird to me, and I don't like it. But the stories that I. I'm kind of lucky because these are things that happened. The. The high Hitler. I don't know if you know that bit. I was walking down. I was living in the east village, walking down 4th street, and. And there's a guy who's fairly well dressed. Like, he's not a crazy homeless guy. In other words, just immediately, this is late at night, and he's, you know, just like, okay, great. You know, he's not talking on the phone or anything. Okay, great. Yeah. Okay, well, that. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Okay. Yeah, hi, Hitler. Yeah, hi, Hitler. And. And. And. And I pass him and I'm like, is he saying, hi, Hitler? And so I turn around, I start following him. And. And he was. He was like, yeah, okay. That. Yeah, way to go. Yeah, hi, Hitler. Hi, Hitler. And I'm like, oh, my God, he's saying, hi, Hitler. Not high. The. In it. And then I started thinking, like, okay, well, there are two possibilities here. And then. So it becomes this whole bit that is something that I really experienced. And. And that's.
Sam Morril
And that's the beauty of New York is.
David Cross
I was just about to say that you walk around. I. So many things.
Sam Morril
It's so much.
David Cross
I have a. I have a bit that is at least half an hour long, which is the longest story I've ever told.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And it's all 100% true. And just happened right shortly before I went to get the tour going. And the thing happened was happening to me. And the entire time, as fucking crazy and awkward as it was, it was like, I can't wait to tell this on stage. Oh, my God, this is gonna be a great bit.
Sam Morril
That's a good thing. That's, like, the positive. When terrible shit happens, you're like, if I don't get a bit out of this, I suck.
David Cross
Yeah, that's really.
Sam Morril
That's really what I think. Like, I mean, yeah, I have two crazy stories in my standup that are both true, that are like. I mean, they're all true. But like, I have a story about a vigilante in Cleveland who saved me from an ass whooping. It was a true story.
David Cross
Really?
Sam Morril
Yeah, it was called. His name was the White Knight. And I never heard from him again. But it was a crazy story. Basically I was just a young comic. I was probably like, you know, early 20s at hilarity's great club. Love that club. And yeah, me and this other guy were kind of like battling out for this girl. And the other guy was crazy and he won because he was crazy and.
David Cross
He kind of at like a bar or something.
Sam Morril
Yeah. And it was after the show and. And basically this guy just came out of nowhere and was like trying to protect me. And I was like, who the fuck is this guy? And he deemed himself the White Knight. He was a crazy person. And the crazy part of it is.
David Cross
But people knew him. He's like a town character guy.
Sam Morril
Some people in Cleveland were like, that guy's real. He's like a crazy guy. I don't think he does it anymore. He's probably retired. Cause he was telling me stories about these.
David Cross
Retired.
Sam Morril
I think he. Well, I mean, he wasn't like a full time superhero. He must have had a day job, you know, but, you know, but he. Yeah, he told me he got stabbed once. And I was like, this guy's fucking insane.
David Cross
But yeah, how do you know you were gonna get an ass whooping?
Sam Morril
Because the guy was like. He was like, I'm gonna fuck you up. And I was just like, it's not worth it. I was like, the guy was clearly crazy. He'd missing a couple teeth. I was like, he's fucking nuts. He's clearly a scrapper. I'm not. I'm not gonna fight. Yeah.
David Cross
New York Jew.
Sam Morril
I'm a New York Jew. I'll take the L here. But then, yeah, the guy, he emailed me later. The White Knight guy. Oh, no, he. Yeah, he emailed me and then I emailed him back and it just. The email was gone. So he like really fancied himself.
David Cross
Whitenight. Gmail.com.
Sam Morril
White Night and. But then years later, the guy who tried to fight me somehow got my number and text me. Like, I saw the bit. It's great. And I was like, you're the guy who threatened to. I thought you were gonna stab me.
David Cross
You're welcome.
Sam Morril
He probably does feel like I gave you that.
David Cross
Yeah. Where's I gave my gut. But wow.
Sam Morril
Yeah. So that, that. And I had another story that like, I'm closing on now on the road this story about this magician from Virginia Beach. I just had a crazy night.
David Cross
Stop right there. Magician from Virginia Beach.
Sam Morril
Crazy. Just a crazy night with this guy. But yeah, they're true stories.
David Cross
Cuz they're, you know, ironically, neither one of those takes place in New York, but I know the I. But that's when you 100% give yourself.
Sam Morril
To a crazy night is like when I'm. Especially when I was younger on the road, I was like, let's just see where it goes.
David Cross
Oh, fuck. Yeah. Yeah. I'm very much not anymore, but I mean, that was half of my life was, you know, I would do whatever you put in front of me. I'd go wherever I got in some very dangerous situations, but, you know, unscathed.
Sam Morril
No, you told me you told the story on our podcast about the crystal meth. I was blown away, man.
David Cross
Which one? Was that?
Sam Morril
Didn't you or you smoke crack or something?
David Cross
Oh, the crack. The crack. That's what it was. That was in Camden in London.
Sam Morril
Yeah. I remember. I remember hearing Holy. I know. David Cross smoke crack.
David Cross
I would do.
Sam Morril
You do not seem like a crack guy.
David Cross
I'm. I'm.
Sam Morril
Well, that's like a guy who chops.
David Cross
Wood in the woods on crack.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
How do you think I. I can get it done in an hour? A whole winter's worth of cord of wood? No, I mean, I don't really do that anymore. But I had.
Sam Morril
We don't really either do it or. You don't.
David Cross
Know. I don't. I. Crack is the one drug. Drug that I've done once. I think I told you that.
Sam Morril
Yeah, no, it's amazing.
David Cross
It's. It was the one where I was like. Because I'm pretty. I have a pretty good willpower. And it was the one drug where I was like, I am susceptible to this for sure. And I was. I've always been an upper guy rather than a downer guy or a. Like pills never did it for me. Heroin? No. Oxy? No. And I was always a crystal, you know, coke, crack type of, you know, energy.
Sam Morril
Wow.
David Cross
And up.
Sam Morril
And I've never done coke in my life. It's. I can't believe it's.
David Cross
I mean, now it's just garbage. It's way too dangerous.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
You can't do it anymore. And it's just so. It's just garbage now. But, you know, again, I sound like an old guy. Oh, back in my day.
Sam Morril
No, I. But I. Yeah, I like. The stuff I like is like downers usually like, like alcohol, a muscle relaxer. Have a cocktail.
David Cross
My wife's more of that speed.
Sam Morril
And I drive myself like a Real Housewife, though. Honestly, I'm just like, I'll take a bath. I'll. I'll pop a pill.
David Cross
Yeah, well, there's nothing wrong with that.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
I mean, you get the Vacu Glide out and that's your true friend. That and you could talk to. Vacu glide.
Sam Morril
Yeah. You know, wait till they get a personality, dude. It's over.
David Cross
But. Well, what are you going to hear just like, that's a terrible joke. Maybe I kind of like, I'm not.
Sam Morril
It wasn't bad. It wasn't bad.
David Cross
What was I going to say? Oh, yeah, that was the one thing where I was like, I, I. It's so. And you get. I got it immediately.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
Because it. You. I was in the dump. The. If I, I have a picture in my head, obviously. But if, if somebody showed me, like, oh, I have a picture where you hung out and it crack on. And these are the people he did it with. I mean, it's crack den. It's basically, I would look at that and go, oh, my God.
Sam Morril
That's what you want to do? Crack. What do you do? Crack in the Four Seasons, you know?
David Cross
Yes.
Sam Morril
You want a den?
David Cross
Yes, I want to den. No, I want to do crack Four Seasons. That minibar. Yeah, that was the one where I was like, I think I probably brought this up too, but I had made a promise with myself that if I ever couldn't do a show because I was too fucked up or too, you know, partying too much, then I have to stop, and I don't want to stop.
Sam Morril
Yeah. And you became the greatest Crackian of all time.
David Cross
I found a way to marry both things. And I stopped and I was doing a month at the Soho Theater in London, and I. And I, you know, there's that thought in your head like, who cares? I'll just cancel the show and I'll stay here with these fucking awful people. And. And just that thought was like, I have to get out of here. Because we were about to get more. We had gotten more throughout the night, and it was now, like the sun was up. And, you know, I had a show to do that night and I was able to do it. Yeah. But that was the one where I.
Sam Morril
Was like, I'm getting, I'm getting a little old to be drinking it. But I went out out last on Saturday and I drank a shitload. And it was one of those nights where I was like, oh, I can't do this. Like, I used to.
David Cross
How old are you?
Sam Morril
I'm 38. But, like, oh, you've got Sam. I know you hate hearing this, but I'm telling you, dude, I drank a lot. And it was one of those, like, next mornings where I was like, oh, I'm canceling plans. You know, I had to go to Brooklyn to see family, and I was so angry, the whole. I normally would take the train, but there was, like, delays, and I was like, all right, I'll cab it. I'm, like, trying not to puke out the window. And I'm like, oh, I'm that uncle now. Yeah, you don't want to be drunk uncle.
David Cross
Yeah. Yeah, that I get for sure. But if, you know, you have stuff, you know, family obligations, maybe don't go so hard.
Sam Morril
But, yeah, I looked at it like, your show. I'm like, I'll just fucking. I'll just cancel, dude. I'll just cancel the family stuff.
David Cross
Well, you can do that, too.
Sam Morril
You could.
David Cross
You know, it's family. I tell them, like, I'm just too drunk. I'm.
Sam Morril
You're just smoking crack like family. Who cares? Fuck him. No, I. I. But I still have the urge to, like, follow a story. I still, like. I do. If it got. I'm like, oh, this could lead to something funny. I can't resist it.
David Cross
I mean, it's been a fun life, if nothing. If it ends today. I've. I mean, I have so many stories that I haven't even shared with people, either on stage or. But that were basically, well, let's see what happens.
Sam Morril
And sometimes you don't realize it's a good story till, like, two years later.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
And you're like, holy shit, that was crazy that I did that.
David Cross
I have a bunch of them, and they're all. You know, it's usually luck and danger and excitement and drugs and alcohol and a woman. And there's some sort of combinations in life, some combination of those things. Yeah.
Sam Morril
Because you look back and you're like, that was cinematic. Like, I love the movie After Hours because shit just keeps going wrong. And I just. I'm like, oh, that's. I'm. I think I romanticize a up night in New York City because of that. But, yeah, no, I will follow a woman through, like, some weird underbelly in New York. I'm like, let's see where the fuck this goes. And it's gonna go.
David Cross
What's the Ted Demi film? Jonathan Demi film.
Sam Morril
Something Wild.
David Cross
Something Wild.
Sam Morril
That's a great one.
David Cross
Yeah. It just starts here. And then, like, halfway through the. It starts. I love. What I love about that movie is it starts off like this kind of goofy thing. And then about two thirds of the way in, you're like, oh, shit.
Sam Morril
I know, dude. There's probably the best Ray Liotta has ever been. He's so good.
David Cross
Oh, yeah.
Sam Morril
Movie. I love him in that. That's a. That's a really underrated movie.
David Cross
Is it underrated?
Sam Morril
I feel like no one knows. I feel like everyone I bring it up to is like, what?
David Cross
Oh, okay. Yeah, it's a. It's. It's a. It's a. And it's very New York specific.
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
You know, is another great.
Sam Morril
I just love. Yeah. I love movies like that where you're like, I don't know where the hell this is going.
David Cross
Yeah. And it's played kind of in real time. There's a little. It's like not. Not Obviously not two hours, but it's. It's over the course of. Not a long time at all. And there's not a lot of. You know, there's no pressure release. You're just. It gets worse and worse. And like, oh, what am I doing in Jersey? And what am I doing here? And.
Sam Morril
Oh, it sounds like a fantasy. And then it's like, you. This is life.
David Cross
Yeah.
Sam Morril
I love that. It starts out like, this is goofy. I'm following the woman. This is great. And then out of nowhere, my. I might die.
David Cross
And also. But what's so great about it is the casting of. It's Melanie Griffith, right?
Sam Morril
Yeah.
David Cross
And she is just the perfect kind of, you know, especially in that era of, like, artsy, ditzy, independent, but very New York tough and.
Sam Morril
And hot.
David Cross
And hot. And of course you're gonna follow her. And of course you're, you know, gonna fall for. Yeah. And then. And then she's Maybe not all she cracks up to be. And then what's. Who's her ex boyfriend? And what's going on here? You know? What is a really good little fun fact, trivia thing? The band at. Who's playing the band at the high school reunion is the Feelies.
Sam Morril
No shit.
David Cross
Yeah, that's.
Sam Morril
I don't even know they are, but they sound great.
David Cross
They were like an indie, you know, new, wavy indie, that era.
Sam Morril
I'm gonna look up the Feelies.
David Cross
Oh, they're good. Yeah. Yeah. But I guess, you know, Jonathan Demi knew him and. And got him to play the band.
Sam Morril
That's such a. Yeah, that's such a. I feel like that movie's not I feel like not enough people have seen that movie.
David Cross
All right, Sam, I. First of all, thank you so much.
Sam Morril
That was fun talking with you. I feel like I've never talked this long. This is cool.
David Cross
No, well, we haven't. But this is a pleasure. And. And I. And I really do love your stand up, I think.
Sam Morril
Thank you, man.
David Cross
Brilliant.
Sam Morril
I. I've ever missed a show. Dvd.
David Cross
So I end every episode with a question from my daughter.
Sam Morril
Cool.
David Cross
And so, Sam, this is yours. I know. And you. And I'm not going to editorialize. You can answer this in any way you see fit. Oh, I know why she asked this. Okay. I remember now. Okay. Oh, do you have anything to plug?
Sam Morril
Yeah, I got Carnegie Hall. December 4th. I got Chicago theater.
David Cross
Wait, back up. You're playing Carnegie hall on December 4th?
Sam Morril
Yeah. Yeah.
David Cross
That's awesome.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I'm pumped. I never played it. It's gonna be. I'm.
David Cross
Oh, that's great, man. Congratulations.
Sam Morril
Thanks. I'm in Red Bank. Count Basie, I think in July. Yeah. October, the Wilbur Chicago theater. A lot, A lot of fun stuff coming up.
David Cross
Yeah. Yeah, that's great.
Sam Morril
Yeah. It's just Samorrell.com but there you go. I'm fired up. Carnegie Hall.
David Cross
Yeah, that's. That's a notch.
Sam Morril
It's a good one.
David Cross
Do you have a belt?
Sam Morril
I don't. I never wear belts. Really?
David Cross
I gotta get a belt and put a.
Sam Morril
Get a fucking belt, dude. You. I'm gonna put around my neck and use that vacu glide.
David Cross
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little auto erotic asphyxiation. Okay, Sam, this is a question from my 8 year old daughter. Do race cars always have batteries?
Sam Morril
Ooh, I think gas. Yeah, but they must have a battery too, right? I don't watch racing. I don't know. I've never seen. I know Formula one is like in right now. I don't know anything about it.
David Cross
I'm not jumping in at all.
Sam Morril
You're not jumping in?
David Cross
No.
Sam Morril
I'm gonna say yes. They do have batteries.
David Cross
They always have batteries.
Sam Morril
They should. Yeah.
David Cross
Okay.
Sam Morril
I. I barely have a driver's license, David. I can't really drive.
David Cross
Because you're from New York.
Sam Morril
I'm worthless. I'm worthless.
David Cross
I've always been a little fascinated with people who grew up in very specific areas. Like. Like New York City is like, that's so cool. But also these other things that you didn't get to do and. But all these things that you did get to do and what kind of person, you know, does that create and you know.
Sam Morril
Yeah, I Know someone who can't drive? Well, not that great. Yeah. I have a license, but it was like, I suck.
David Cross
Okay. Yes. I mean, it's not hard. You'll pick it up.
Sam Morril
I can do. I have a license, but I'm just bad at it.
David Cross
And what does that mean? You're just getting in accidents or.
Sam Morril
Yeah, yeah. I remember I was dating a girl once. She's like, just take my car and just pick me up in Queens. I was like, okay. And I drove there, and I crashed. I just crashed the car. I was like, I don't fucking know. I'm not good at this. She didn't notice it. Like, the scratch was not bad, but.
David Cross
How did you sideswipe a car?
Sam Morril
I sideswiped.
David Cross
So it's about spatial, kind of.
Sam Morril
I guess I'm just not good at it. I'm fucking. I passed the driver's test by, like. Like, apologizing. I had failed twice already, and then the third time, I was like, please don't fail me. I'm not good at this. And she laughed. I was like, oh, so. All right. And she. And I sucked, and she passed me. She was like, yeah, you're fine.
David Cross
Oh, it's on that woman.
Sam Morril
It's on her. Yeah, I shouldn't have a license.
David Cross
Blood. There's blood on her hands. Yeah, whatever. Hidden runs you've been a part of.
Sam Morril
Not. That's why I don't drive. Yeah. I don't want to.
David Cross
Because you'll kill people.
Sam Morril
I'll kill people. Yeah, I will.
David Cross
All right, Sam, thank you again for coming down. Sammurl.com Carnegie Hall. That's nice. Chicago theater. That's a big one.
Sam Morril
That's one of the best.
David Cross
Yeah, that's a big one. Okay, man. Thank you.
Sam Morril
Thanks, dude.
David Cross
And thank you for the whiskey.
Sam Morril
Yeah, no problem.
David Cross
Yeah, Nice Sense is working Overtime is a Headgum podcast created and hosted by me, David Cross. The show is edited by Katie Skelton and engineered by Nicole Lyons with supervising producer Emma Foley. Thanks to Demi Druchin for our show Art and Mark Rivers for our theme song. For more podcasts by headgum, visit headgum.com or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and maybe we'll read it on a future episode. I'm not gonna do that. Thanks for listening. That was a Headgum podcast.
Title: Senses Working Overtime with David Cross – Episode Featuring Sam Morril
Summary:
In this compelling episode of "Senses Working Overtime with David Cross," host David Cross engages in an intimate and humorous conversation with comedian Sam Morril. The discussion traverses a wide array of topics, including entrepreneurship in the comedy world, personal anecdotes from their lives on tour, struggles with substance abuse, and insightful advice for aspiring comedians. The episode offers listeners a candid glimpse into the lives of two seasoned comedians navigating the challenges and triumphs of the entertainment industry.
[01:03] Sam Morril:
"Jesus Church."
The conversation kicks off with Sam Morril introducing his latest entrepreneurial venture—Bodega Cat Straight Rye Whiskey. Sam shares the journey of launching a whiskey brand, highlighting the challenges faced while trying to break into the market despite initial struggles in smaller comedy venues.
[02:03] Sam Morril:
"We have not even come close to making our money back. But that's all right."
David Cross and Sam discuss the strategic steps taken to position Bodega Cat in prestigious venues like the Comedy Cellar and the Comedy Store. They humorously craft a mock advertisement for the whiskey, emphasizing its New York roots and the unpretentious, mischievous spirit of bodega cats.
[05:00] David Cross:
"Which will be nice. Yeah."
David Cross transitions the conversation to his personal life, detailing his experiences living upstate New York. He talks about his hobbies such as gardening and chopping wood, illustrating how these activities provide a therapeutic escape from the hustle of city life.
[07:30] Sam Morril:
"Anything in New York is a pain in the ass."
The duo reflects on the high cost of living in New York City compared to the more affordable and serene upstate regions. They discuss the cultural shifts brought about by newcomers and the subsequent rise in property values, painting a vivid picture of the evolving landscape.
[19:28] Sam Morril:
"Nothing going on. There was like one open mic a week."
Sam Morril shares his observations on the lack of vibrant comedy scenes in cities like New Orleans, attributing it to the dominant focus on other cultural elements like music. David Cross echoes these sentiments, comparing it to his experiences in Nashville and Atlanta, where rapid growth has led to a loss of local character and the prevalence of corporate chains.
[38:07] David Cross:
"And just don’t worry about it."
The conversation delves into valuable advice for up-and-coming comedians. Both David and Sam emphasize the importance of performing regularly, recording every set, and embracing silence during performances to avoid the pitfall of over-talking.
[39:10] Sam Morril:
"I love when some new shit bombs just because..."
Sam discusses the significance of experimenting with material and understanding that not every joke will land. This trial-and-error approach is crucial for comedians to refine their craft and develop unique voices.
[60:07] Sam Morril:
"His name was the White Knight."
Sam Morril recounts a harrowing experience involving a self-proclaimed "White Knight" who intervened to prevent a physical altercation at a comedy club. This story underscores the unpredictable nature of nightlife and the unexpected heroes that emerge in dire situations.
[62:55] David Cross:
"Crack is the one drug. Drug that I've done once."
David Cross opens up about his brief encounter with crack cocaine during his time in Camden, London. He reflects on his resilience and ability to overcome the temptation, highlighting the personal battles that comedians often face behind the scenes.
[56:10] David Cross:
"Because you can do that, too."
Both comedians share their touring experiences, discussing the logistical challenges and unforeseen events that occur while on the road. Sam narrates a stressful incident where the tour bus drove off the road due to the driver's fatigue, emphasizing the risks involved in extensive touring.
[47:04] Sam Morril:
"I have a story about a vigilante in Cleveland..."
The discussion shifts to the evolution of comedic material and the importance of originality. They talk about how personal experiences and genuine stories make for the most compelling and relatable jokes, as opposed to relying on clichés or overused premises.
[44:28] Sam Morril:
"There's so many, like, I feel like edgelord comedy is so in right now."
Sam criticizes the trend of "edgelord" comedy, advocating for thoughtful and well-earned material. Both comedians stress the need for depth and authenticity in comedy, encouraging others to push boundaries responsibly.
[71:53] Sam Morril:
"Yeah, I got Carnegie Hall. December 4th..."
As the episode wraps up, Sam Morril promotes his upcoming performances at prestigious venues like Carnegie Hall and the Chicago Theater, expressing his excitement and pride in reaching these milestones. David Cross congratulates him, and Sam shares his website for fans to learn more about his shows.
[72:36] David Cross:
"Do race cars always have batteries?"
In a light-hearted exchange, David poses a whimsical question from his daughter, leading to a playful banter about race cars and driving skills, showcasing the relaxed and friendly dynamic between the hosts.
Sam Morril [02:10]:
"Investment is an investment."
David Cross [38:14]:
"Don’t be scared of silence."
Sam Morril [60:04]:
"He was like, I'm a New York Jew. I'll take the L here."
Sam Morril [63:37]:
"I'm 38. But, like, oh, you've got Sam. I know you hate hearing this, but I'm telling you, dude, I drank a lot."
David Cross [44:08]:
"But that is the good thing when people are like. I remember a tell once was like, growing's good."
This episode of "Senses Working Overtime with David Cross" offers a rich and engaging exploration of the world of comedy through the eyes of Sam Morril and David Cross. From entrepreneurial ventures and personal challenges to invaluable advice for budding comedians, the conversation is both entertaining and enlightening. Listeners gain a deeper understanding of the perseverance and creativity required in the comedy industry, all delivered with the trademark humor and authenticity that David Cross brings to his podcast.
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For more information on Sam Morril’s performances, visit samorrell.com.