Shawn Ryan Show: Peak Points | Travis Howze with Lewis Howze - The Saddest Moments with a Firefighter

Release Date: January 24, 2025
Host: Shawn Ryan
Guest: Lewis Howze
Episode Title: Peak Points | Travis Howze - The Saddest Moments with a Firefighter

Introduction

In this heart-wrenching episode of the Shawn Ryan Show, host Shawn Ryan engages in a deeply personal and candid conversation with Lewis Howze, a former firefighter whose life was irrevocably changed by the tragic Sofa Superstore fire. The episode delves into the harrowing experiences of firefighters in the line of duty, the profound impact of traumatic events, and the arduous journey towards healing and sobriety.

The Sofa Superstore Fire: A Day of Tragedy

[00:30] Setting the Scene
The episode opens with Lewis recounting the events leading up to the Sofa Superstore fire—a catastrophic incident that claimed the lives of nine firefighters. On June 18, 2007, what began as a normal day swiftly turned into a nightmare.

[04:27] The Golf Tournament
Lewis: “June 18, 2007, started out as a normal day for us... We were having a golf tournament for another friend of ours who was a firefighter killed four months to the day prior in a car accident.”

[05:27] Responding to the Call
As the fire erupted in the massive one-story furniture warehouse, Lewis and his fellow firefighters rushed to the scene, unaware of the impending disaster. The building, notoriously referred to by the crew as a "death trap," was known for its hazardous layout, making firefighting operations perilous.

[09:05] First Signs of Tragedy
Lewis: “What eventually ended your career in the fire service?”
Travis probes deeply into the moment when Lewis realized the gravity of the situation, highlighting the intense emotions and immediate leadership required in such dire circumstances.

[14:46] The Moment of Realization
Lewis describes the gut-wrenching discovery of his best friend, Lewis Mulkey's, remains:
Lewis: “I looked down and I realized my hands were on the shoulders of one of our guys. His head should be right here, but there was no head.”

The Aftermath: PTSD and Career End

[22:36] Breaking Down
Post-tragedy, Lewis's mental health began to deteriorate. He shares the culmination of unresolved trauma that led to violent outbursts and strained relationships within the firefighting community.

[25:42] The Breaking Point
After a series of violent incidents, including a physical altercation during a funeral and assaults at the training facility, Lewis reached his breaking point. The lack of adequate mental health support within the fire department exacerbated his struggles.

[26:31] Seeking Help
Despite the introduction of counselors, Lewis's initial resistance—rooted in the macho culture of the firefighting community—hindered his ability to seek help.
Lewis: “If you go talk to anybody, you're a [coward].”
He reflects on the regret of not embracing the available support systems sooner.

Journey to Sobriety and Recovery

[32:00] Turning Point
Lewis recounts the pivotal moment after his wedding in 2012, where he realized the destructive path he was on. Determined to change, he quit alcohol cold turkey.
Lewis: “I woke up the next morning, I said, man, I don't ever want to touch this stuff again. And I haven't.”

[34:10] Healing Takes Time
Recovery was not instantaneous. Lewis emphasizes the importance of perspective in overcoming trauma.
Lewis: “How do I want to view my world? Do I want to look at it through this victim feeling bad, horrible, poor me lens... Or do I want to look at it from a standpoint of... making a positive impact?”

[35:34] Embracing a New Perspective
Sitting in his living room, facing a life-threatening moment, Lewis had an epiphany that shifted his outlook:
Lewis: “I was sitting in my car with a gun in my hand, ready to blow my brains out... I realized I needed help.”

Lessons Learned and Moving Forward

[32:37] Embracing Change
Lewis discusses the slow but steady progress in his mental health journey, emphasizing the significance of ownership and acceptance.
Lewis: “It was something as simple as perspective. That was the question: How do I want to view my world?”

[35:58] Advocacy and Support
Now in recovery, Lewis dedicates himself to supporting other firefighters and first responders, advocating for mental health awareness and breaking the stigma surrounding seeking help.

[36:24] A Message of Hope
Lewis concludes with a powerful takeaway for listeners grappling with their own demons:
Lewis: “There's nothing wrong with me and you being completely human and not being okay. It's okay to not be okay.”

Notable Quotes

• Lewis Howze at [04:27]: “We were having a golf tournament for another friend of ours who was a firefighter killed four months to the day prior in a car accident.”
• Lewis Howze at [14:46]: “I looked down and I realized my hands were on the shoulders of one of our guys. His head should be right here, but there was no head.”
• Lewis Howze at [22:40]: “The reason I talk about it is you can see a shift in people's behavior. Like we're family and when you see somebody acting differently, something is wrong.”
• Lewis Howze at [32:37]: “How do I want to view my world? Do I want to look at it through this victim feeling bad, horrible, poor me lens... Or do I want to look at it from a standpoint of... making a positive impact?”
• Lewis Howze at [35:34]: “I was sitting in my car with a gun in my hand, ready to blow my brains out... I realized I needed help.”
• Lewis Howze at [36:24]: “There's nothing wrong with me and you being completely human and not being okay. It's okay to not be okay.”

Conclusion

This poignant episode of the Shawn Ryan Show offers a raw and unfiltered look into the life of a firefighter battling the aftermath of a life-altering tragedy. Lewis Howze's story serves as a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the critical need for mental health support within high-stress professions. His candid reflections not only honor the memory of his fallen comrades but also provide invaluable insights and hope to those navigating their own struggles.

For those who haven't listened to the episode, this summary encapsulates the essence of Lewis's journey—from the depths of despair following the Sofa Superstore fire to his path of redemption and advocacy. It's a powerful reminder that even in the darkest moments, seeking help and shifting one's perspective can lead to profound healing and purpose.

Listen to the full episode on your favorite podcast platform to gain deeper insights into Lewis Howze's incredible story of loss, resilience, and hope.