A Great Place with Jameela Jamil

Summary

Sibling Revelry with Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson

Episode: "A Great Place with Jameela Jamil"

Released: August 18, 2025
Guests: Jameela Jamil (with Oliver Hudson leading most of the conversation)

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Episode Overview

In this relaxed and deeply personal episode of "Sibling Revelry," Oliver Hudson is joined by actress, writer, and outspoken advocate Jameela Jamil. The conversation ranges widely—from sibling bonds, family traumas, and British vs. American beauty standards, to Jameela’s unorthodox entry into the entertainment industry, her relationship with musician James Blake, and the importance of irreverent humor and honesty. Listeners get an intimate look at Jameela’s vivid storytelling, her bold takes on activism and cultural identity, her health challenges, and the profound influence her brother has had on her life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Controversy, Activism, and Authenticity (08:02–11:09)

• Is Jameela Jamil Controversial?

  • Jameela openly acknowledges she’s seen as controversial but believes she simply refuses to shy away from difficult topics:

    "I'm just unafraid of controversy rather than literally courting it." (08:08)

  • She sees herself as someone who challenges systems and institutions, and that the backlash is a sign of her effectiveness:

    "I threaten massive institutions...I inspire other people to also use their voices and that can be very dangerous." (09:01)

• Distinguishing Activism from Advocacy

  • Jameela is clear-eyed about her place in public discourse and critical of celebrities co-opting “activist” status:

    "To deem myself an activist when I'm posting from my movie trailer is foul business, it's foolery." (10:48)

  • She prefers the term “advocate,” reserving “activist” for people organizing and risking without privilege:

    "I would call myself and the rest of us privileged fools advocates." (10:34)

• Oliver’s Admiration

  • Oliver:

    "There's no hypocrisy with you in any way." (11:09)

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2. The Pressures of Appearance: US vs. UK (12:09–14:35)

• The duo riff on the different beauty standards in LA and London. Jameela jokes about LA being "airbrush city," contrasting it with the roughness and authenticity of London:

  "In England we all look sort of more haggard and very emotive...I think it's still frowned upon to be concerned with your appearance." (13:22)

• On cultural snobbery around looking too polished:

  "To be polished is to be boring." (13:05) — Jameela

• Hilarious take on British eating habits and lack of “movie flossing”:

  "We don't even perform flossing, it's not a part of our culture. We're all toothless, we're all hungover, we don't eat right, we order fries with every single meal including breakfast." (12:17)

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3. Jameela’s Unplanned Showbiz Origin (15:01–16:36)

• She never aspired to entertainment and was “street-scattered” (scouted) in a bar to be on British TV, prompted by a lucrative offer:

  "He said it was a thousand pounds a day and without hesitating I was like please give me the email." (15:09) — Jameela

• Started as an English teacher, never formally trained in acting before starring in "The Good Place":

  "I'd never acted before I did 'The Good Place.' That was my first time on set." (15:54)

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4. Sibling Bond – The Heart of the Episode (20:18–27:36)

Jameela’s Relationship with Her Brother

• Jameela has a half-brother, ten years her senior, who became her “gift” and best friend growing up:

  "He just loved the out of me the second I was put into his arms...I'm certain that the reason I know how to act now is because my entire...childhood was spent making up characters to entertain my brother." (21:12)

• On their separation when her brother left for Spain:

  "I threw a tantrum that has never been seen before at Heathrow...I lost my . It was like he was never...going to see him again." (22:11)

• On reconnecting as adults and finding each other as chosen family:

  "Sometimes you don't have any chemistry with your sibling and sometimes you just do, and it's like the universe just plopped one of your soul mates...into you." (26:42)

Notable Story:

• Her brother’s elaborate, creative games, like simulating time travel and pretending their parents were aliens.
• He once ran into a burning room to save her:

  "My parents didn't [save me from fire]—he did." (25:53)

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5. Childhood, Cultural Identity, and Family Dynamics (27:36–30:06)

• Jameela describes her family as “socially bohemian but academically strict.”

  "We were very much...steeped in white British culture and American culture." (28:28)

  • Her parents avoided teaching her and her brother their original language, trying to assimilate after facing racism.

• Underlying sadness and emotional challenges:

  "I come from a family of mentally troubled, abused people...I knew that being funny or making them laugh or making them proud created just a little respite." (29:02)

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6. On Romantic Relationships (35:51–43:46)

• On Her Relationship with James Blake

  • Oliver observes their relationship appears easy and balanced.

  • Jameela on the “team” mentality:

    "We are a full team and we've been a team pretty much since the minute that we met." (36:19)

  • She credits her brother for raising her expectations for a respectful, gentlemanly partner.

  • They started as friends; James came to visit for 5 days and “stayed for ten years”:

    "We did kind of accidentally move in with each other because he came out to Los Angeles just to visit for five days...and then he stayed for ten years." (38:36)

  • On not marrying and being inspired by Goldie Hawn:

    "I told you that your mum inspired...one of my favorite songs of his...She said, 'I don't want to get married because I want to choose him...’" (40:35)

• On Marriage and Superstition

  • Jameela expresses a quirky superstition that marriage tempts fate:

    "It's like please don't send me, you know, someone tempting—just leave me alone and we've been thus far left alone." (43:23)

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7. Spirituality and The Meaning of Life (43:50–46:16)

• Jameela has a pragmatic (and comedic) approach to spirituality:

  • Believes in karma "because I love revenge," and in God only "when I'm at the dentist." (43:50)
  • On the concept of "pronoia" (the opposite of paranoia):

    "Anytime anything goes wrong...I go, 'that probably protected me from something else.' Burnt toast theory, sliding doors...I always believe I'm on a timeline." (44:55)

• She and Oliver agree they’re not “deep thinkers.”

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8. Health Struggles: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (46:43–49:01)

• Jameela candidly describes living with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome:

  "It's a lack of collagen in every cell of my body, which means that I'm like an elastic lady...I dislocate all the time...my skin will never age...but my insides are of like, probably a hundred-year-old." (46:43)

• Shares stories of working through extreme pain, her commitment to professionalism, and a new, bizarre Canadian health mishap:

  "I got a hernia working out with one of our co-stars...in my esophagus because I'm so weak." (47:53)
  "I got bitten on the eye by a meat-eating fly called a black fly...My eye fully swelled up like a testicle." (49:05)

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9. Ambition, Fun, and Creative Identity (50:11–53:47)

• Jameela discusses her aversion to ambition in showbiz:

  "People will be so guarded around me...but whenever anyone actually then works with me, they're like, oh wow, she really is just showing up for a vibe." (50:25)

  • For her, fun is the true metric of success:

    "I'm gonna make my metric of success fun—not awards, not followers, not money." (51:17)

• On writing, podcasts, and her observational style:

  "I think I'm a good essayist...I love the truth of human beings, I'm obsessed with our motivations, why we do things." (52:33)

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10. Gossip as Social Glue (53:47–55:19)

• Both hosts delight in the joys of eavesdropping and gossip:

  "I love gossip, I love it...My hair is so long because it's full of secrets." (54:43)

• Jameela humorously admits:

  "I never give away the secrets of my friends, I give away the secrets of my enemies. But could you destroy people's lives with the things you know? One hundred percent—I can't wait to get dementia." (54:56)

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11. Jameela’s Comedy Podcast: Wrong Turns (55:34–57:01)

• Jameela plugs her new podcast "Wrong Turns":

  "It's a comedy disaster podcast...about all of the disasters that have happened to me and all of my favorite funny people...the worst decisions we've made...that have no silver lining, no great pearl of wisdom." (55:41)

• Notable guests have divulged confessions never previously shared.

  • Oliver is set to be a future guest and feels nervous about his story:

    "I've got to think about what the hell I'm gonna talk about because you have a lot, I have some stuff." (57:01)

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12. Closing Reflections on Friendship and Acting (57:13–58:48)

• Jameela and Oliver express mutual respect and affection as scene partners and aspiring future collaborators:

  "You're genuinely one of my favorite scene partners I've ever had...Every so often I get sent really good humans that make it really fun and remind me why I love it, and you're one of those people." (57:13)

  • They joke about developing a comedy about a gossip-loving couple.

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Notable Quotes

• On controversy and activism:

  "I think I just fly a little too close to the sun, but that's okay, I never planned on this career anyway." —Jameela Jamil (09:37)

• On creative process:

  "I'm a good essayist...I love the truth of human beings, I'm obsessed with our motivations, why we do things." —Jameela Jamil (52:33)

• On sibling bonds:

  "Sometimes you just do, and it's like the universe just plopped one of your soul mates into...out the same puss, you know." —Jameela Jamil (26:42)

• On gossip:

  "Let's go home and talk shit about everybody...his favorite moment of any party is when we get in the car and gossip." —Jameela Jamil (54:07)

• On marriage:

  "I feel as though James and I are flying under the radar, keeping a low profile, not tempting the universe." —Jameela Jamil (43:23)

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Key Timestamps for Segments

• Jameela on controversy & activism: 08:02–11:09
• On British vs. American standards: 12:09–14:35
• Showbiz beginnings: 15:01–16:36
• Sibling stories: 20:18–27:36
• Childhood/culture/family: 27:36–30:06
• Relationship with James Blake: 35:51–43:46
• Spirituality and karma: 43:50–46:16
• Living with Ehlers-Danlos: 46:43–49:01
• Career philosophy: 50:11–53:47
• Podcast plug/wrap-up: 55:34–57:01
• Mutual appreciation & comedy idea: 57:13–58:48

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Tone and Atmosphere

Warm, irreverent, honest, and full of laughter. Both Oliver and Jameela embrace candid vulnerability and wit, trading stories of failures, family, and fleeting fame against the backdrop of real talk and cultural critique.

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For Those Who Haven’t Listened

This episode offers an in-depth, unfiltered, and in many places hilarious exploration of Jameela Jamil's life and philosophy. It is as much about family pain and healing as it is about pop culture, showbiz myths, and the little disasters that make us human. The rapport between Oliver and Jameela creates a safe space for confession and self-mockery, making for a lively yet deeply poignant listen.

Transcript

[Jameela Jamil]

This is an i heart podcast you.

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[Oliver Hudson]

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[Jameela Jamil]

No purchase necessary vgw group void where prohibited by law twenty one plus terms and conditions apply hi i'm kate hudson.

[Oliver Hudson]

And my name is oliver hudson we.

[Jameela Jamil]

Wanted to do something that highlighted our.

[Oliver Hudson]

Relationship and what it's like to be siblings we are a sibling revelry no.

[Jameela Jamil]

No sibling rivalry don't do that with.

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Your mouth.

[Oliver Hudson]

Sibling revelry that's good oliver hudson oliver hudson i've been saying my name a lot lately i it's a slow day i had to wake up super early and drop my kids off at the airport getting that age now where they're flying alone you know i think i think they're all cool they're going back to la they're doing camp counselor stuff which is good anyway all that all that to say i'm just tired oi yai gotta get up at six with the boys but no reason to complain i'm in beautiful colorado looking outside my window the sky is blue the clouds look fake the trees are green so what am i what am i complaining about a little fatigue in my life summer's coming to an end and that's sad all the kids are back in los angeles and i'm taking about a week under a week just to spend some time with milady solo mission end of the summer just get our bone in just gonna bone it out just gonna bone it out a lot i'm gonna try you know because when i when i try and then i get rejected i get upset so then i stop trying you know it's this vicious cycle but i don't get rejected that much we have a nice boning atmosphere twenty five years in if you don't bone you can't find home you know what i mean that was hemingway hemingway wrote that all right enough of boning i'm sure we'll talk a lot about boning in this next in this next segment with his next guest who i worked with on a netflix show called a merry little x miss i think that's what it's called i'm in the movie and i still don't know the exact title of the movie but we hit it off tremendously immediately because she has absolutely no filter as as do i as i don't as do i not whatever the correct english is so please welcome into the show onto the show jamila jamil what up.

[Jameela Jamil]

Babe hi how are you i'm good.

[Oliver Hudson]

How are you where are you i'm.

[Jameela Jamil]

In london i was just looking through photos of our movie shoot and what a cute couple we were yes i.

[Oliver Hudson]

Just got those as well the kills so for those that don't know you go through you know they send you pictures and you can slash the ones that you don't like or want i'm way too lazy to go through that so i just i let it ride.

[Jameela Jamil]

Nice i let it ride very good.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yeah but i did just do adr yesterday so i got to see a little bit and i almost threw up.

[Jameela Jamil]

Great i can't wait i can't stand.

[Oliver Hudson]

Looking at myself it just makes me crazy it makes me crazy yeah yeah.

[Jameela Jamil]

Ted danson said that he cried the first time he sort of saw the good place so judgmental of himself and he's so hot it's so ridiculous no.

[Oliver Hudson]

I know i know well what are you doing you're in i was just in london why were you in london well i was there for six days after the i was in greece and we did six days in london and then i stayed because i did the american bake off let me ask you a question do you think controversy follows you or do you bring in controversy.

[Jameela Jamil]

I think i hunt it out do you hunt it out i hunt it down rather i seek it out and then i hunt it down i think it's both i think i don't want to be a controversial person in fact i don't really understand why i am deemed so controversial why the media try to frame me as so controversial but i am aware when i am poking the hornet's nest i'm aware that it's a touchy subject and that doesn't deter me so i think i'm just unafraid of controversy rather than literally courting it but people make it seem like asking for sort of equality is a really crazy thing to do but why do.

[Oliver Hudson]

You think you're such a target day.

[Jameela Jamil]

And i think they're crazy well i.

[Oliver Hudson]

Know because i look we're friends now i follow you i see all the shit that you sort of you know stir up and then i see you know you posting things and this and that and you know sort of pleading your case essentially you're saying well here's the truth here's the reality of all of this but why do you think.

[Jameela Jamil]

You'Re a target because i threaten massive institutions and i think i threaten systems and and because i'm a decent communicator i sometimes have been proven to inspire other people to also use their voices and that can be very dangerous when it comes to disrupting or dismantling power and so they want to make an example of those of us who stand up and speak loudly so that other people won't want to do it so if they you know humiliate you or lie about you or take things away from you then other people will be deterred from following in your path and so i think i just fly a little too close to the sun but that's okay because you know i never planned on this career anyway so it's inevitable it's going to you know all go down in flames but how did.

[Oliver Hudson]

Activism do first of all do you consider yourself an activist no no okay that's what i thought i knew that but i'm for the audience right no.

[Jameela Jamil]

We use that word we give that.

[Oliver Hudson]

Word well define well exactly define define potentially what you feel that you are and then what activism is or what an activist is why is that word so kind of diluted now well because.

[Jameela Jamil]

It'S trendy it became trendy after the two movement and anyone who said anything that went against the current was suddenly named an activist and deemed an activist and a lot of people in our industry believed it and and i think to be called an activist you have to be an actual organizer who's taking actual risks who's on the ground without the privilege and protection to know it's fundamentally going to be okay if if you take this stance or you make this you and so i would call myself and the rest of us privileged fools advocates you know you can advocate for a cause you can signal a cause to other people and highlight other great voices but but to deem myself an activist when i'm posting from my movie trailer is foul business it's foolery.

[Oliver Hudson]

Well this is why i love you because you have your head is on very very straight it feels like there's no hypocrisy with you in any way.

[Jameela Jamil]

What'S well very old i think if there was i've hopefully straightened most of.

[Oliver Hudson]

It out what do you mean you're.

[Jameela Jamil]

Old i'm forty i'm forty yeah you.

[Oliver Hudson]

Know what i mean i'm forty nine.

[Jameela Jamil]

So okay well you're also old i.

[Oliver Hudson]

Am and i just saw it like yesterday when i was watching our scenes.

[Jameela Jamil]

Don'T you love it though no do.

[Oliver Hudson]

You love it at all no no i don't i mean the funny thing is there are some where i'm like ah look alright i'm not even paying attention to performance at this point i'm not really watching a scene i'm just seeing my face pops up i'm like wait what since when did i have jaundice you know i'm like what the happened why am i yellow that's just.

[Jameela Jamil]

Because you're white standing next to me.

[Oliver Hudson]

Probably and then there's scenes i'm like look all right you know fit the skin tones there and then boom next scene you're like what the is going.

[Jameela Jamil]

On i think you've been in la too long and you need to get the out i'm here i'm in colorado right but in i'm in england right now and we're all rough as over here and it makes you feel sane you know everyone's face is moving yeah everyone's dyed their hair the wrong color we don't brush our teeth but we don't even floss in movies you know how americans are always flossing in movies yeah we don't even perform flossing it's not a part of our culture we're all toothless we're all hungover we don't eat right we order fries with every single meal including breakfast it's just it's it's a it's a lovely normal ground to be so i think you just need to get out of airbrush city.

[Oliver Hudson]

But why but but why but why is london still like that are the.

[Jameela Jamil]

English still like that yeah look we're not impenetrable you know because of the internet but it's just you've walked around the streets here generally like to be polished is to be boring but i.

[Oliver Hudson]

Never understood the teeth thing i don't get that why like why i think.

[Jameela Jamil]

We just can't be asked we're busy we're busy abusing our bodies you know it's not it's we go too far with it right you know like the fact that if you were to order a salad people would think you're dying right genuinely concerned if you order a salad for a meal but i think we just don't care i don't think it's i think it's still frowned upon to be concerned with your appearance which is a different type of snobbery but it's one that makes you feel less self critical like the difference in our actors here versus in america is insane like in la i feel like a lot of our actors look like they're straining for a poo when they're trying to cry yeah because of their faces are so frozen whereas in england we all look sort of more haggard and very emotive and expressive and also so much of our stuff is so you can't like have your lips done right frozen piss and be like my lord right wherefore art thou because it would look crazy yes yeah yeah so i think it's just a different culture you know i think it's it's just different but i think if you get out of where you are you'd realize you're.

[Oliver Hudson]

A london eleven yeah yeah well i loved it my kids loved it we had a blast the weather was was amazing though so we had fun it was we saw a lot of really nice teeth too by the way were.

[Jameela Jamil]

They your own in the mirror yep.

[Oliver Hudson]

They'Re my own but you said that you didn't want to do this right you didn't want to be an entertainer you didn't want to get into this world yeah so how did that happen.

[Jameela Jamil]

For you oh i was an english teacher and i was street scattered at a pub by a producer who thought i was ridiculous and he said that i should be on television and i said i would never be on television i was you know i was very up my own ass in my snobbery and he then he said it was a thousand pounds a day and without hesitating i was like please give me the email and i emailed in like a a cover letter and a really daft picture of me dressed as like an old santa claus and then they asked me to send in a video so i sent it a video and then they asked me to come in and audition and i did and i got the biggest youth entertainment job in britain how old were you i was twenty two almost twenty three and so.

[Oliver Hudson]

Wait up until that point you were.

[Jameela Jamil]

A teacher i was an english teacher.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yeah you were in english what what grades were you teaching crazy isn't it.

[Jameela Jamil]

Because i'm so stupid oh no i was teaching english as a foreign language and then i was teaching teenagers english literature having read very few books yeah i've always been a bullshitter yeah no i know this is how i am you know it's who i am i didn't know how to act i'd never acted before i did the good place that was my the first audition right was time i'd ever acted you know my first time on set was the first day on the good place like on a movie set or a tv show set i i told you know marvel i would be able to fight and then they learned the hard way that that was a really crazy thing.

[Oliver Hudson]

For me to say no i know i i saw you try to run on our show oh.

[Jameela Jamil]

Humbling times do you remember me on the sled we all thought i was gonna die yes.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yes you thought you were gonna die.

[Jameela Jamil]

No you all did i have you on video shitting yourself you know that.

[Tommy Bahama Advertiser]

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[Sports Announcer]

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[Jameela Jamil]

You.

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Know what i love about august it's like the last hurrah of summer totally.

[Oliver Hudson]

It'S the perfect time to get away before everything ramps up again well some.

[Tommy Bahama Advertiser]

Of my favorite travel memories have happened in august especially abroad same here and.

[Oliver Hudson]

In the past we've stayed in some amazing airbnbs in europe that made the experience even better so if you're heading.

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[Oliver Hudson]

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[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Oliver Hudson]

Did you want to be a teacher is this what you grew up wanting to do as a.

[Jameela Jamil]

Little girl no i wanted to be.

[Oliver Hudson]

A doctor right well let's go back into that like first of all where did you grow up i grew up.

[Jameela Jamil]

In london and then spain and then a little bit in pakistan and then back to london and then i just moved all over london there's almost nowhere in london that i haven't lived i moved like thirteen times as a kid.

[Oliver Hudson]

Okay and with your parents with your.

[Jameela Jamil]

Family with my parents yeah with my parents with my brother i've only got one brother i have like three half siblings but i don't know them okay but my brother is also my half sibling but i do know him and he's you know the love of my.

[Oliver Hudson]

Life that's right i know when did he become your half sibling were you.

[Jameela Jamil]

Are you the oldest no he's ten years older than me so when i.

[Oliver Hudson]

Was born oh wow so it's an interesting age gap there it is but.

[Jameela Jamil]

It was kind of genius because he was old enough to be really excited to have a buddy you know and he he just loved loved the out of me the second i was put into his arms and my mum had done something very smart which is to tell him all throughout the pregnancy that this was going to be his baby she was you know creating a like a like his toy his baby so when i arrived he didn't feel threatened he was like my gift has arrived and he was so happy to see me and cherished looking after me and teaching me things and teaching me creativity and games and i'm certain that the reason i know how to act now is because my entire like really young childhood was spent making up characters to entertain my brother.

[Oliver Hudson]

Oh wow but did that did he go away to university did he leave at a certain time you know how did that how how was that because then essentially you became.

[Jameela Jamil]

An only child yeah yeah he left when i was six or seven and i didn't know until we got to the airport because everyone was so scared because everyone knew i was completely obsessed with him yeah and i would follow him everywhere i was a velcro sibling yeah and he would let me because he's very cool and then they told me at the airport as he was going through the crossing and it was like sophie's choice i i threw a tantrum that has never been seen before at heathrow i'm amazed i'm ever allowed back but i lost my it was properly like a film it was like he was never it was like he was going away to war and i was never going to see him again because at that age you don't know you know you have no concept of and to spend a day without him would have killed me but to know that he was leaving to move to another country he moved to spain with my grandmother because that's where she lived and that's where we'd partially grow up partially grown up and it ruined my.

[Oliver Hudson]

Life i mean how did you you're six years old very resilient children are but how do you square that and then when did you guys reconnect again.

[Jameela Jamil]

We stayed in touch but it became harder as i went through my teens without him you know we we went our separate ways for a really formative period of time so it was really as adults that we became super close.

[Oliver Hudson]

Again so there was a bit of a separation in the sense that he.

[Jameela Jamil]

Was doing his life there was a separation he was off doing his thing and and that distance felt really far away we didn't have the money to go out and see him all the time so i you know i was able to go and stay with him like one time when i was eight and it was the i think it was the entire best week of my childhood where i was just allowed to just go and be just me and him and and he i remember on the final day i was sobbing because i knew i had to leave and then he played and it was raining outside and his room overlooked the sea and then he played here comes the sun that was the week he introduced me to the beatles and he was playing me the red album and the blue you know the compilation albums and he played here comes the sun and all of a sudden the sun came out and all the rain went away and it was one of those like kind of core memories of magic and that was when i became obsessed with the beatles which i'm still obsessed with now james keeps begging me to stop buying beatles memorabilia for our shared home and i yeah my my aesthetic in our home is like a foreign exchange student but yeah that was so that was very painful then after that you know i just grew into my own very isolated person like i didn't really make friends after that partially because i was so weird and he was the only person who understood me but also because he set such a high bar for companionship you know i had the greatest best friend of all time who used to like this is how thorough my brother was like he would create universes not just games he would throw me in a he would throw me in a sleeping bag the wrong way so head first and then he would put on a hair dryer and then roll me around on the floor so i would think i was traveling through space and time and i was in a rocket and then he would put pick me up put me in like a washing you know the washing basket and then drag me like you know what felt like warp speed and i'm still in the blanket i still can't see anything he's dragging me through the apartment and then i land in a room and he's had it covered in tinfoil he's covered everything in now i know we're in the future and then he would tell me that my parents weren't really my parents they were aliens that really fucked me up.

[Oliver Hudson]

Wow but.

[Jameela Jamil]

He was so cool and creative you know he ran into a fire to protect me like my my parents didn't and he did really yeah they stood there frozen this like you know this air conditioning unit in pakistan caught fire and he ran into the house in a into a room that was on fire and got me wow so i owe this motherfucker forever but when did.

[Oliver Hudson]

You reconnect to where you got close.

[Jameela Jamil]

You know really close probably in my.

[Oliver Hudson]

Twenties and then how did that happen you guys just grew up well i.

[Jameela Jamil]

Moved near him i moved near him he moved back to england i moved in literally around the corner from me got it and so we saw each other all the time and and i think i think you just like you get i think you and kate have this like sometimes you don't have any chemistry chemistry with your sibling and sometimes you just do and it's like the universe just plopped one of your soul mates yeah into you know in out the same puss you know yeah yeah.

[Oliver Hudson]

It'S ideal yeah yeah yeah and so.

[Jameela Jamil]

I have i have nothing in common with you know the rest of my family but my brother is like one of my like exact identical sense of humor like he's kind of my parent.

[Oliver Hudson]

He shaped me he did he raised you a little yeah and with your other halves is it is it just just doesn't work it's just sort of eh i mean or is there animosity there or is it just sort of like it just it wasn't we didn't connect and as simple as that i.

[Jameela Jamil]

Think we just never were around each other so we never connected and they were way older than me okay got it the youngest one of them was sixteen years older than me okay and i'm from the second marriage so you know i don't think anyone was trying to get to know the baby from the marriage that their mother was left for you know what i mean which.

[Oliver Hudson]

Is fine yeah and what was your what was your childhood like was it strict was it creative were you free and independent was it was there a cultural aspect to it it was weird.

[Jameela Jamil]

It was like sort of socially bohemian you know i didn't like my parents were very western they were not trying to practice our culture at all like they didn't teach me and my brother the language they didn't we didn't eat the food we didn't listen to the music so we were very much so like a westernized asian family because so much racism that my parents faced when they moved over i think they were both maybe a bit traumatized so they desperately like they spoke in such like like cut glass fake british accents really exaggerated you know when they would speak to white people on the phone and then an indian accent when they speak to indian people on the phone so.

[Oliver Hudson]

They would put it on yeah so.

[Jameela Jamil]

It was we were very much so like it's steeped in white british culture and american culture like so much american music and american mov and then and and you know they were they were sort of you know they were loosey goosey people in that way but they wanted me to be very very academic because academia is just like very very intense in south asian households so there was a lot of pressure on me to be very academic to compete with my cousins the very competitive like families that i come from and how did.

[Oliver Hudson]

You take how do you take to.

[Jameela Jamil]

That i don't know because there was nowhere i wasn't like discipline wasn't being modeled for me at home because it's all like music and film but i just still had to excel so i i think i just had to i just i just knew the pressure that was on my shoulders to achieve and make my family very proud and you know i i've spoken about this before i don't like to go into too much depth about it but i come from a sad family like i come from a family of mentally troubled abused people you know who struggle with their mental health in all kinds of different like like debilitating ways and i was aware of that from as soon as i could understand so i knew that being funny or making them laugh or making them proud created just a little respite through the tension and the mania of my household that was you know in moments very you know fun and entertaining but also terrifying so so you know so i just got through it you know you just understand as a kid what you need to do and so i made my entire identity studying and then no one fingered me till.

[Oliver Hudson]

I was in my twenties by choice no he told me that story.

[Jameela Jamil]

You.

[Oliver Hudson]

Told me the story of that moment very very funny i didn't tell you.

[Jameela Jamil]

About getting fingered i think you might have no i didn't i don't even remember i just know it didn't happen until i was in my twenties what.

[Oliver Hudson]

Are you thinking of well there was some sort of a sit that happened later way later on in life where it was like let's just get this over with maybe it was losing your.

[Jameela Jamil]

Virginity no it was my first kiss it was my first kiss best friend because everyone was worried that everyone bought me the fucking movie forty year old no no it's not i'm not a hollywood child i i the forty year old virgin came out and i was in my early twenties and everyone was scared that was going to be me so one of my best friends just laid one on me just kissed me and then it was done and then i became a kissing maniac but just with him you know and so i've still not really sewn my wild oats i've only slept with like five people.

[Oliver Hudson]

But that's not who you really are.

[Jameela Jamil]

No it's just not i have no game and you know that now you know it's not an act we've spent.

[Oliver Hudson]

Some significant time together no i know i i know but would you that attribute that just to who you are you know i mean just you just but you found your man you found.

[Jameela Jamil]

Your guy yeah i don't know how well when he writes these songs about me these love songs i'm like is he having an affair like who is this about cannot be about me i think i told you when we were in canada together that he wrote this song with travis scott you know who at the time was dating his baby mama kylie jenner and she's very like sexual and he was singing like you know travis is singing about kylie and james is singing about me and and travis is like airs better than a beach and then he's talking about her peach and he's just being really like raunchy and then james's lyrics are sort of like she's a very nice person and she's my best friend she's a.

[Oliver Hudson]

Very nice person she's my best friend.

[Jameela Jamil]

Yeah it's like just just being like just dunked in humble pie but that is who i am you know that.

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[Oliver Hudson]

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[Oliver Hudson]

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[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Oliver Hudson]

It'S amazing how you have found someone and he has found someone who you just understand each other and it sounds like you live very sort of independent lives in the best possible possible way because you are not you are not relying on each other necessarily you know you love each other and want each other and want to be with each other but at the same time you know there's you know some ease to what you guys do it's different different than most relationships would you would you say that's.

[Jameela Jamil]

True i don't know i don't know if i'm aware of too many other relationships i know that we're best friends and we're obsessed with each other so that's just really nice and i know that he treats me incredibly well we treat each other very very well and with lots of respect and we are a full team and we've been a team pretty much since the minute that we met even when we want to kill each other it's we're still a fucking team and i think i think i can also credit my brother as to why i was looking for a gentleman in my life my brother's a proper gentleman like old school gentleman like to the point where for a while he started dressing as like a victorian gentleman and he took it too far but that was very chic in london you know in the like noughties and nineties you know none of us i was thinking the other day when walking through the park in london i was like god if an alien landed here right now they would have no idea what year this is because everyone is so dedicated to we don't just like have a nod to another era you have like nineteen year olds who've never seen anything from the seventies like dressed like full like full dylan vibes yeah yeah it's very very funny but anyway so my brother was the like the most gentlemanly person i've ever met and i think i always looked for that in partners as someone who was very very kind and had great manners and and was old fashioned in that way you know i've never i've never really dated disrespectful i've never had a an attraction to disrespectful people thank god because god knows hollywood has trained women to look for disrespectful bad boys yeah yeah.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yeah like me gone quite well for.

[Jameela Jamil]

You yeah.

[Oliver Hudson]

Exactly i'm doing great i'm doing really very very well but you're.

[Jameela Jamil]

Not a bastard no not at all.

[Oliver Hudson]

Of course i am come on how did that start how did the relationship start was it it slow and steady because you know and by the way how much does humor play in to this because you're very funny obviously you love to laugh you love to make people laugh you love shock value irreverence all of these things so you have to find someone that can match you.

[Jameela Jamil]

Yeah silliness has got to be the only way i've survived this relationship because i'm sure that if i didn't make him laugh as much as i did he would have left me by now so much about me is like is not what he ordered you know it's just yeah it's what he ordered versus what he got which is hilarious to me but i think humor was a massive part of it we met we start we were friends first so not too quickly and then we we did kind of accidentally move in with each other because he came out to los angeles just to visit for five days and you know we weren't seeing each other and then he stayed for ten years so you know he was just staying in my room and i had a you know flat share with another roommate and we just lived there for about a year and a half and then we got our own place so we lived together pretty much from as soon as we started shagging but but we still didn't say i love you for like nine months and we didn't we didn't really accept that this was a relationship for eighteen months wow we were very just like you know we weren't shagging other people but we just weren't taking it seriously because he was twenty and he was a musician and actual victoria's secret like legit literal women who have wings trying to have sex with him i have no wings women who have like beauty crowns i have a burger king crown you know like so so i was never like oh yeah no we're gonna be together forever and then after about eighteen months we realized we really really didn't want the other one to shag anyone else so we just kind of made an official commitment to each other after eighteen months after eighteen months yeah that's when we really took it seriously and realized oh i i actually really love you i'm so annoyed you know because i was supposed to have my hoe phase you know i'd been waiting right my whole life for this whole phase that was gonna begin i was like i'm about to be thirty i'm moving to california i'm gonna be a big old slut i love it and then he you.

[Oliver Hudson]

Know he i'm so sorry i know.

[Jameela Jamil]

Well we can't block each other you know and that's it so and and now i i think we're gonna probably go the distance we're gonna try to go the whole distance we're not married no but i told you that your mum inspired that's right one of my favorite songs of his she gave an interview explaining her relationship with kurt russell and she said that i don't want to get married because i want to choose him you know i just i enjoy the fact that i could leave the house and go anywhere and i choose to come back to him and i said that to james when i i never want to get married that i was incredibly inspired by your mum and then he wrote a song called choose me on you know very shortly after we started dating yeah and it's some people's favorite song of his so thanks to your mom it is true.

[Oliver Hudson]

It is true though what i mean mary what is what does marriage actually provide you what does it do you.

[Jameela Jamil]

Know i i told you my theory.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yes but my mother was the one who said what are you doing you know because i would get her jewelry every christmas and i would show my mom say i'm thinking about this this and this and i brought her some jewelry a ring and a necklace whatever she goes why what are you gonna propose when you get her a ring it's been three years i said what are you talking about are you crazy no like i'm not gonna get married you're not married it works i come from divorce and that didn't fucking work so and then she says well it's not you don't have to get married right away it's a symbol do you want to be with her for the rest of your life i said yes well it's just a symbol it's to show her that you do so then i i went for it and then it spiraled me for the next two years i started to trip out but you know my mom was the one who sort of made me propose what she did to put me at ease was just say look you don't have to you don't have to get get married get married in four years if you want but it's just you know so that's the she's the reason that.

[Jameela Jamil]

I even proposed yeah well look i mean you you are the exception you're not the rule when it comes to marriage and i think james and i have kind of built this superstition via watching what's happened to a lot of our friends which is that almost as soon as they get married a sexy ex comes back someone suddenly turns up at work who's like everything they've ever wanted and you're like oh fuck do you tempt fate when you stand there and you speak directly to god and you say like i vowed to be with this person forever is god just like oh yeah bet and so i so i've developed this silly superstition that you know i feel as though james and i are flying under the radar keeping a low profile not tempting the universe it's like please don't send me you know someone tempting just leave me alone and we've been thus far left alone and i think it's because i know a couple who were together for like thirty years unmarried got married he immediately had an affair no never had an affair before yeah total chaos like potentially on the brink of divorce chaos yeah and so i think i just think it's it's tempting the universe it's a stupid theory i never said it was intelligent but it works for us.

[Oliver Hudson]

Well good you know i never even i don't think we've ever touched upon.

[Jameela Jamil]

Spirituality no i believe in in things that are convenient to my life so i believe in karma because i love revenge you know i don't think about good karma i just think of like i can't wait till you get your bad karma you come i'm a petty person like that and then i believe in god when i'm at the dentist you know and i'm like please god i swear to god i'll stop eating sugar i'll start flossing please if you just don't make me like have a root canal please god so all of a sudden she's religious right so so i'm you know i'm not going to be given any gifts by the because i only call when i need something no one wants the friend who only calls when they need something there's no other dedication you know or loyalty that i show so no not terribly not just you know no horoscopes no anything i'm really just kind of you know flying by the seat of no pants.

[Oliver Hudson]

No pants but nothing bigger no bigger energy no no tapping into things no so coincidence is just coincidence you know it just life is basic sort of.

[Jameela Jamil]

Although i'm i'm maybe but i kind of you know i do believe in pronoia you know pronoia which is the opposite of paranoia i don't know the universe is is conspiring in your favor okay so i never think the universe is against me anytime anything goes wrong i i generally you know once the once the wound has healed go oh that probably protected me from something else it's also known as the burnt toast theory you know you burn your toast on your way to work and then that makes you angry because it's inconvenienced to you because now you're late but because you were late you didn't get hit by that car or run into that ex or something sliding doors another great example so i think i think it's just because i saw sliding doors that i believe in that so i just always believe i'm on a timeline yeah yeah it's actually not a very good movie but it's such an incredible.

[Oliver Hudson]

Yeah i haven't seen it i know.

[Jameela Jamil]

But i rewatched it i rewatched it recently for the first time in twenty years and i was like this is a bit shit but the concept is so incredible that it doesn't matter and the performances are all good it's just not particularly well written and you don't you kind of know that they just didn't need to write it that brilliantly because the concept is such a like.

[Oliver Hudson]

Runaway hit yes okay that's fair i'm sort of on your page you know i'm not a god person i'm just.

[Jameela Jamil]

Not a deep thinker you know that's what it is i'm no i'm not.

[Oliver Hudson]

I don't believe that sometimes i feel like you sell yourself short i sometimes i feel like you use your bluster to sort of deflect from your depth sometimes that's i don't know i might be a puddle that's just me knowing you a little bit not a lot but a little bit what is ehlers.

[Jameela Jamil]

Danloff syndrome it's a lack of collagen in every cell of my body which means that i'm like an elastic lady got it so like my arm is normal like this but then oh no looks broken so i'm just sort of very bendy i dislocate all the time i'm very clumsy i fall down the stairs constantly i have lots of stupid health emergencies my heart doesn't work properly my teeth are rubbish but my skin will never age so it's it's weird like my insides of the painting in my basement so i had the insides of like you know probably a hundred year old but my exterior will never crease which is really crazy wow so.

[Oliver Hudson]

It'S like a bit double edged yeah.

[Jameela Jamil]

I don't know i don't care i like wrinkles but i yeah it's so it's it's weird it's it's weird to look young and feel so old because.

[Oliver Hudson]

You'Re sick all the time i know i know i remember but you're such a trooper though i just want to say jamila was going through some shit just a stomach bug or whatever the fuck was going on no it wasn't.

[Jameela Jamil]

A stomach bug i got a hernia working out one of our co stars in my esophagus because i'm so weak.

[Oliver Hudson]

Well because he's six eight yeah one.

[Jameela Jamil]

Hundred percent he's made of muscle and the only way he doesn't he doesn't leave the gym so if you want to bond or hang out with him and become friends you have to go to the gym to hang out right and so i bro i brought my like i brought some pringles and a can of fanta as my electrolytes because i'd never you know been a fitness person so he immediately didn't take me seriously and then kind of punished me for it by working me out so intensely and hardcore not in like a flirty wet like like boot camp yeah and and he worked me out so hard and i'm so pathetic that i i got a hernia in my esophagus.

[Oliver Hudson]

In my food tube oh my lord i didn't realize that was the official.

[Jameela Jamil]

Diagnosis that was the that was the beginning of it and then it just escalated from there but i never missed a day and i was never late.

[Oliver Hudson]

She did not jamila it was unbelievable she would cr i mean just on death's door at scene but i would leave kill the scene and then just leave and then come back and leave come from the hospital the ultimate professional.

[Jameela Jamil]

It was an insane shoot and you know i fucking went back to canada recently to film something else and because that was my first time shooting in canada was with you guys and then i went back to canada recently i don't know if you saw this on the internet but i got bitten on the fucking eye by a meat eating fly called a black fly didn't know they have those in canada and it gave me some sort of black fly fever which i'd never heard of before flies guys are so timid in england but they're carnivores in canada it bit me on the eye while i was filming and my eye fully swelled up like a testicle and then i posted it but no one read the caption so they thought i'd been beaten up by james and it was chaos online chaos are you kidding no it was a nightmare because no one reads the.

[Oliver Hudson]

Caption oh my gosh what's going on maybe maybe you should go to canada.

[Jameela Jamil]

I know it's final destination it is but yeah that's what's wrong with me i've got ehlers danlos syndrome it's incredibly not fun and loads of people have it and don't know that they have it and that's really sad yeah well.

[Oliver Hudson]

I loved working with you i think we had a blast and you've been working more now right i mean you've.

[Jameela Jamil]

Been yeah i've been i've been i work in bits of work you were.

[Oliver Hudson]

A little hesitant about like okay i'm doing this gig and it was like do i want to do this all right fuck it let's go do it.

[Jameela Jamil]

And we haven't done that much since we spoke like i really am like like i'm not very ambitious you know this now like people one of the things that drives me mad is that throughout my career i've you know especially i get this from other women i don't really get this from men but women will be so guarded around me which is so ironic because i love women so much but they'll be guarded around me and weird and competitive and they'll think that my whole like i don't know what i'm doing is an act to try and get their guard down so i can go in for the kill but whenever anyone actually then works with me they're like like oh wow she really is just showing up for a vibe she's really got no designs here i said to you that i never want to be higher than like number six on a call sheet right my sweet spot is like number six come in be fun off again right you know i really love i love this industry but i love it in little bite sized chunks i don't let it define me and i think it can be quite dangerous i think you know i was i was very lucky that i was a journalist you know before i became an actor so my job was to interview actors and musicians and superstars you know i got to interview all the most famous people in the world all the time and that was my job and so i got to see them behind the scenes you know i'd go away on like four day trips with them and do documentaries about them and stuff and i had never met a super successful person who was really really happy and i think that really marked me and so i was like right i'm gonna make my metric of success fun not not awards not followers not money like i'm just gonna make it fun and so all my jobs i pick are based on who i get to have fun with you know i wanted to meet you i wanted to meet alicia i wanted to meet melissa joan hart you know so i i took that movie without even reading the script because i was like oh i i love all these people i want to meet them and hang out with them for a.

[Oliver Hudson]

Month would you say the written word is what sort of inspires you the most or what you connect to the most you know i mean what is it you're most passionate about as far as your creativity goes i don't know.

[Jameela Jamil]

I don't know if i'm an especially creative person i'm an essay writer so.

[Oliver Hudson]

I think beautiful writer though that's creative.

[Jameela Jamil]

Yes that's very kind but again i'm not super creative i think i'm a i think i'm good at documenting what's happened i think i have like a i think i'm i'm i'm good at relaying a story and so so i i don't think i'm going to be someone who comes up with i don't know lord of the rings but i do think or succession but i think that i'm a good essayist and so i love writing essays and i love having a podcast like i love reality i love the the i love the truth of human beings i'm obsessed with our motivations why we do things all all like i think the reason i love being in europe so much is because or new york is because you're immersed in humanity all of the time whether you want to be or not whether it's someone farting in your face on the train or it's someone you know it's it's you know i sometimes this is so wrong and i shouldn't admit it because it's such a bad thing to say but fuck it i follow people all the time i follow them when they're on the phone and something really juicy has been said i want to know how it ended yeah so i'll just take a detour in my walk with my dogs because no one showed up for his birthday weekend and he's reading everyone for filth and i want to i want to make sure he's okay and he got all his words out so you know i just i'm eavesdropping all the time i'm a nosy creepy little bitch i love.

[Oliver Hudson]

That i relate to that entirely you know sometimes my wife and i will be at a restaurant and something will happen and all of a sudden it gets loud and she's the same way we just stop talking and we just we just start listening and then after.

[Jameela Jamil]

I love that everyone else thinks you're in a bad marriage you know we're.

[Oliver Hudson]

Just not having a conversation people don't.

[Jameela Jamil]

Have anything in common with each other and it's it's like actually james wrote this lyric that summarized both what soulmates we are but also what horrible people we are which was let's go home and talk shit about everybody let's go home finally i'm gonna send you this song cause i think you'll really like it but it's because his favorite moment of any party is when we get in the car and gossip yeah oh it's the best it's just like it's such a bonding thing to do well.

[Oliver Hudson]

That'S what i love about you because everyone's like oh gossip it's sort of it's negatively connotated but you're like fuck that i love gossip i love it.

[Jameela Jamil]

The reason my hair is so long and thick i'm obsessed my hair is so long because it's full of secrets but i never give away i never give away the secrets of my friends no i i give away the secrets.

[Oliver Hudson]

Of my enemies but could you destroy people's lives with the things you know.

[Jameela Jamil]

One hundred percent really yeah i can't wait to get dementia oh it's gonna be everyone great when i when i when i don't know how to keep.

[Oliver Hudson]

A lid on it which you are you're already trying to keep that lid on it i mean who's let's who's kidding like you were that lid is.

[Jameela Jamil]

By the way i feel the same way about you we were both lucy goosey oh god from the second we met i feel like we bonded over hey who do you hate right.

[Oliver Hudson]

Well.

[Jameela Jamil]

This is just a bunch of bitches in the snow and kettle of course.

[Oliver Hudson]

And it was fun as hell jam jam talk about your podcast i was supposed to be on it the timing didn't work out in la but i'm going to be on it talk about.

[Jameela Jamil]

It yes i have a new podcast it's a comedy disaster podcast called wrong turns and it's basically just that you know when life gives us lemons not all of us make lemonade some of us just you know develop a hiatal hernia in our esophagus but it's about all of the disasters that have happened to me and to all of my favorite funny people from around the world and a hilarious stories in the audience just about the worst decisions we've made the worst things we've ever done that have no silver lining no great pearl of wisdom shoved up your ass so.

[Oliver Hudson]

The guests are bringing their own stories.

[Jameela Jamil]

Yeah it's just it's where dignity goes to die and we all just marinate in our own horror together and that's why people seem to love it because it gives them thirty minutes of just feeling smug and better than other and i think that that's the gift that the world needs right now and have.

[Oliver Hudson]

You had some guests reveal some things that they had never revealed yeah we.

[Jameela Jamil]

All saw a side of simon pegg last week that we didn't expect it and adam pally yeah jordan firstman all these hilarious people may martin bob the drag queen like just hilarious people saying shit that we all swore and believed that we would take to the grave but didn't we just shared it for the entire world to hear so if anyone wants to hear it it's called wrong turns with jameela jamil and you're.

[Oliver Hudson]

Going to be a guest and i'm gonna be on it and i've got to think about what the hell i'm gonna talk about because you have a lot i have some stuff i have some stuff i hope i get to.

[Jameela Jamil]

See you soon same you're genuinely one of my favorite scene partners i've ever had like i had such a a blast working with you you're such a fun ridiculous man yeah a very generous actor and improving dumb shit to do with you right that's fine one of my favorite experiences on that shoot or on any shoot and so thank you because every so often i get a bit disillusioned by actors and i don't mean to sound like a massive bitch but i think we've established by now i'm a massive bitch but i get disillusioned with actors because sometimes they can just be the worst you know and i don't think that's a surprise to hear for anyone they could just be the worst and so it's like the you know if there is a universe or a source or a god or something it's like every so often i get sent really good humans that make it really fun and remind me why i love it and you're one of those people so if i do another acting job yes it'll be because you you you topped me up until we.

[Oliver Hudson]

Need to do lovely accent we need to do a comedy me and you that's what we do something outrageous something.

[Jameela Jamil]

About gossip something about a couple that loves to gossip and gets into trouble.

[Oliver Hudson]

Oh my gosh right exactly that's not a bad idea well i hope i get to see you i don't know when i will but maybe one of these days we'll run into each other.

[Jameela Jamil]

Yet again we have a premiere in november friend oh that's right don't help us if we do the press together.

[Oliver Hudson]

Oh we will and it's going to be crazy okay they won't air any.

[Jameela Jamil]

Of it they're going to air all.

[Oliver Hudson]

Of it okay right and then then we'll be in trouble yeah yeah that's.

[Jameela Jamil]

It yeah all right well look love you lots love to the family love.

[Oliver Hudson]

You babe yes you too tell james to say hello i will that's my girl jamila jamil jamila jamil jam jam she was so much fun she has so much energy she is so irreverent she talks so much she has no filter whatsoever if you know who she is you already know that her podcast is hysterical you must check it out and she's extremely talented in pretty much everything she does she has a sub stack that she writes that's really great always seems to be controversial because she's unafraid that's my lady all right i'm out.

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[Jameela Jamil]

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[Jameela Jamil]

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[Oliver Hudson]

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