Sibling Revelry with Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson

Episode: Who Says Sliding Into DMs Doesn’t Work?
Date: December 18, 2025
Guests: Nikki Marie (Content Creator, Podcaster)
Host: Oliver Hudson
(iHeartPodcasts)

Episode Overview

This episode explores the power of internet connections (specifically sliding into DMs), the realities of divorce and single parenting, navigating menopause, sibling dynamics, ADHD, and redefining parenting and career ambitions. Oliver Hudson sits down with Nikki Marie after she reached out to him via DM, and the pair engage in a candid, humorous conversation about life's twists, family legacy, vulnerability, and embracing authenticity both online and offline.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sliding into DMs — How This Episode Happened

(06:00–07:00)

• Oliver jokes about Nikki DMing him, which led to this conversation, highlighting the theme that unpredictable outcomes can arise from a simple online message.
• "She actually DM’d me. She slid into my damn. And I wanted to have a chat... she talks about relationships and menopause and female things and being a single mom." – Oliver [05:55]

2. Vulnerability, Masculinity, and Being Seen

(07:00–08:30)

• Oliver reflects on how hard it is for men to show vulnerability, especially with women they love.
• “For men, it’s harder to reach that place of true vulnerability... with women that I love... there’s a fear there... just being totally upfront, saying, I love you... that would make me retreat.” – Oliver [08:00]
• Nikki notes that care and empathy keep relationships alive.

3. Career Transitions & Embracing Authenticity after Divorce

(10:00–16:00)

• Nikki shares how her divorce propelled her into content creation and leaning into her innate humor, despite early professional pressure to be more serious.
• "I started noticing that I was taking myself more seriously and starting to be stressed out about work... that climb the ladder Nikki kind of got away from like, true Nikki, which is like, I'm sending Snapchats to everybody." – Nikki [14:43]

4. Building an Online Presence—Genuine Connections & Challenges

(16:30–19:00)

• Nikki discusses treating her 4 million followers "like I'm on FaceTime with four million people," and balancing authenticity with privacy as her kids grow older.
• "It's just so personal, you know, when it's not flashy, when it's not set up, when it is just sort of handheld, boom. Here I am... Here's what I'm going through." – Oliver [18:28]
• Handling their kids' privacy as public figures is an evolving challenge.

5. Divorce, Dating, and the Perimenopause Experience

(19:00–24:00)

• Nikki talks openly about how her perspective on dating and partnership has changed after divorce and perimenopause.
• “You almost wish you had this perspective about dating before you got married... Now the man of my dreams is like, wait, is that even fucking possible? I don't know if that person exists.” – Nikki [21:01]
• Funny story about her brother, who manages her career, pushing her to start menopause sooner for sponsorship deals.
• Menopause Metaphor:
  "Perimenopause is like, there’s no filter in the pot. The beans are going everywhere. We don’t know what day it is. We don’t know if we’re hot or we’re cold or we’re pissed or we’re happy." – Nikki [23:18]

6. The Sibling Relationship—Support, Teasing, and Half-Siblings

(28:13–30:13)

• Nikki has an 18-year age gap with her half-brother, who is her brand manager. Their relationship is loving, teasing, and supportive.
• “He’s the only person that can get me to take nights off, like away from my kids... when he comes home, I'm like, I gotta go do a thing." – Nikki [29:00]
• Their podcast dynamic mirrors Oliver and Kate’s dynamic—honest, nothing off-limits.

7. Only Child and 80s Upbringing

(30:20–32:19)

• Nikki recounts being an only child and an 80s tomboy, hypercompetitive, ADHD “social butterfly,” who poured her focus into sports.

8. Social Media Content—Knowing (and Not Knowing) the Audience

(32:19–33:50)

• Nikki admits she doesn’t really curate for her audience, doesn’t know them in detail (except “90% are women”), and just puts her unfiltered self online.
• “The men that follow me... you’re a good egg. If you know my, you’re, you’re standing up for your wife.” – Nikki [32:39]

9. Healthy Masculinity and the Role Models We Need

(33:50–39:00)

• Discussion of the importance of positive male figures and multi-dimensional masculinity.
• Nikki reminiscences about her grandfather as the “epitome of romance.”
• “I think we all need to get more curious about why we do things as men and as women and why we feel certain ways...” – Oliver [34:39]

10. Parenting, Career Sacrifice, and Motherhood

(36:10–39:00)

• Both hosts discuss the personal sacrifices—especially women—make for parenting.
• “When my kids are 9 and 11, I’m all in. Unless a man can come in and bring something to the table... I’m with my kids.” – Nikki [37:29]
• Oliver relates how his father figure (Kurt) shaped him and how present he wants to be as a dad.

11. Single Parenting and Raising Boys

(39:00–46:05)

• Nikki asks Oliver how single moms can best support their sons.
• Oliver tells a formative childhood story: Kurt leaving him alone to find his way home on an ATV, teaching self-reliance and independence.
• “You’re okay. You’re... You’re fine. And I was like, okay... now I want you to get us home. And... it was this epiphany.” – Oliver [40:20]
• Reference to Richard Reeves and the importance of boys’ emotional care.

12. Emotional Vulnerability in Boys & Men

(46:06–49:49)

• The lack of affectionate communication among men, and how simply reaching out (“Hey dude, thinking about you”) can be powerful.
• “We don’t get those things as men... And when you as a dude, when you get that, first of all, if my friend texted me, I’d be like, dude, is something wrong? Are you okay?” – Oliver [46:07]

13. ADHD: Challenge and Superpower

(12:23–14:43, 47:54–51:34)

• Both Oliver and Nikki discuss late-in-life ADHD diagnosis and how their brains work.
• “It needs to be looked at as a superpower... I like that my brain’s all over the place.” – Oliver [51:15]

14. Academic Performance, Self-Worth, and Parenting Styles

(52:00–56:48)

• Both share past poor SAT scores and not equating their worth with grades.
• Parenting approach: effort over achievement, open communication, not overly strict.
• “If I see that you tried and you get an F but you studied your ass off, I'm like, good. You did it. You win, buddy. That's it.” – Oliver [54:11]

15. Love Languages in Marriage

(57:35–59:11)

• Oliver discusses how he and his wife have different love languages (hers: acts of service, his: physical touch), and how awareness helps their relationship.
• "Mine's physical touch. And her, her, her last love language is physical touch. So it's hard, you know." – Oliver [59:02]

16. Final Reflections: Understanding Each Other Across the Gender Divide

(60:02–60:11)

• Both appreciate a real male–female dialogue about understanding one another’s experience.
• "I love the male, female coming together. Talking... in a way, trying to understand each other." – Nikki [60:02]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On vulnerability:
  “There’s a fear there of just fully opening up... and I just want to tell you that... that would make me sort of retreat, you know?” – Oliver [08:00]
• On perimenopause:
  “We don’t know if we’re hot or we’re cold or we’re pissed or we’re happy. We don’t know who we’re mad at, but if you're in front of us, it’s going to be you to blame...” – Nikki [23:18]
• On raising independent kids:
  "If I see that you tried and you get an F but you studied your ass off, I'm like, good. You did it. You win, buddy. That's it." – Oliver [54:11]
• On sibling connection:
  “Only siblings can really, like hard time for him was like, is a hilarious time for me.” – Nikki [28:25]
• On ADHD:
  “It needs to be looked at as a superpower.” – Oliver [51:00]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 05:55 – Nikki “slides into DMs”, origin of episode
• 08:00 – Vulnerability and gender roles in relationships
• 12:23–14:43 – ADHD in adulthood, self-acceptance
• 19:00–24:00 – Dating after divorce, perimenopause, and libido
• 28:13–30:13 – Sibling dynamic, working with her brother
• 40:20 – Oliver’s "learning independence" ATV story
• 46:07 – The importance of checking in on other men emotionally
• 51:00 – ADHD as a creative superpower
• 54:11 – Parenting philosophy: effort over outcome
• 59:02 – Navigating love languages in marriage
• 60:02 – Embracing curiosity and dialogue between men and women

Summary Reflection

This episode is a candid, warm, and frequently hilarious look at how real people navigate change, aging, career pivots, parenting, and intimacy. Both Oliver and Nikki lean into their vulnerabilities, championing the importance of honesty, humor, and family—whether by blood, marriage, or daring online message. Their stories are relatable to anyone facing life transitions, and their playful banter makes complex issues feel approachable and human.

Follow Nikki:
Instagram: @NikkiMarieInc
Movies Mentioned: Merry Little Xmas (Oliver's Netflix Christmas movie)
Book Referenced: The Tipping Point (Malcolm Gladwell), Lean In (Sheryl Sandberg)
Guest reference: Richard Reeves (Boys and Men) [45:10]

Note: Advertisements and non-content sections such as sponsor reads and outros have been omitted.
For full stories and anecdotes, listen to the episode directly where segments and timestamps above are referenced.