The One About Bob's Teeth

Summary

Sibling Rivalry: “The One About Bob’s Teeth”

Date: January 12, 2022
Hosts: Bob the Drag Queen & Monét X Change

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Episode Overview

This episode of Sibling Rivalry dives deep into Bob’s feelings and experiences about a chipped tooth, with Monét persistently encouraging Bob to get it fixed. The episode unpacks the emotional baggage, boundaries, and friendship dynamics surrounding body insecurities, self-care, and respecting each other’s experiences—punctuated by their trademark playful bickering, vulnerability, and comedic back-and-forth. The latter half shifts into broader conversations about dental care, childhood tooth traumas, and the hosts reflect on sensitivity, boundaries, and conflict in their friendship.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening the Can of (Sensitive) Worms

[01:21 - 02:10]

• Monét asks Bob if he's going to fix his chipped tooth.
• Bob reveals deep sensitivity about the topic, saying he experienced a chipped tooth from third to tenth grade, which created lasting trauma:

  “I have a lot of trauma around having a chipped tooth and being teased about having a chipped tooth.”
  (Bob, 01:53)

2. The Tooth Debate: Timing, Sensitivity, and Friendship

[02:10 - 07:59]

• Monét encourages Bob to fix his tooth now while he has time, thinking it would help him avoid future insecurity.
• Bob insists dental care is his choice, expressing frustration with Monét’s persistence and lack of acknowledgment for his sensitivity:

  “I'm telling you I'm sensitive about my tooth, and you are ignoring that I am sensitive about my tooth.”
  (Bob, 03:01)

• Monét frames her approach as “problem-solving” out of care; Bob sees it as disregarding his autonomy and feelings.

3. Prioritizing Others Versus Self-Care

[06:00 - 12:38]

• Monét suggests that Bob often helps others before taking care of himself, referencing their past collaborations.
• Bob debates the difference between helping at a detriment and personal fulfillment, questioning the validity of Monét's examples.

4. Semantics, Straw Man, and Typical Sibling Back-and-Forth

[13:33 - 15:21]

• The hosts debate the meanings of “detriment” vs. “hurt” and introduce the concept of the “straw man” argument, using their own conversation as a meta-example:

  “Straw man is literally defining Sibling Rivalry.”
  (Monét, 14:31)

5. Boundaries, Sensitivity, and Conflict Resolution

[15:21 - 26:51]

• Bob advocates for following someone's lead when discussing body insecurities:

  “It is good form to follow people’s lead when it comes to talking about their bodies.”
  (Bob, 15:21)

• Monét argues that close friends have more leeway to push boundaries for one another’s benefit.
• Repeated attempts at clarifying intentions, feelings, and apologies ensue, with much circular debate:

  “I apologize if what I said made you feel defensive.”
  (Monét, 33:36)
  “That’s not an apology, in my opinion.”
  (Bob, 33:05)

6. Riffing on Sensitivity, Podcast Dynamics, and Argument Feedback

[36:40 - 37:35]

• Monét questions if the fans enjoy episodes centered on their arguments.
• Bob’s stance: arguments are part of the podcast’s DNA:

  “If you do not like people who are disagreeing, don’t listen to this podcast.”
  (Bob, 37:35)

7. Dental Experiences & Childhood Trauma

[38:10 - 46:26]

• Monét recounts her first dentist visit at age four after injuring a tooth while ice skating, leading to later dental surgeries.
• Bob discusses the longstanding impact of chipping a tooth as a child.
• Both hosts reflect on genetics’ role in dental health and recall bad oral habits in their youth.

8. Humor Amidst Vulnerability

[42:51 - 43:08]

• As the conversation lightens, Bob and Monét joke about the tooth fairy, international differences in tooth rewards, and the absurdity of children's myths.

9. Modern Dental Trends, Braces, and Self-Image

[45:25 - 46:55]

• The hosts reflect on how braces, once social embarrassments, are now sought-after trends.
• Bob shares he never had braces but has had multiple teeth replaced, often with Monét poking fun at the timing of his dental repairs.

10. Handling Sensitive Topics & Mutual Boundaries

[46:55 - 70:31]

• Bob shares not feeling “safe” discussing his tooth with Monét due to perceived insensitivity.
• They examine the importance of respecting boundaries, referencing a video Monét doesn't want Bob to share—illustrating how boundaries operate in their friendship.

11. Random Musings: Existence, Simulation Theory, and Empathy

[54:02 - 59:51]

• The show veers into discussions about the pointlessness of legacy, the potential for humanity’s extinction, and putting kindness into perspective.
• Both hosts reflect on how they interact with children and drunk people, revealing quirks in their social interactions.

12. Closing Anecdotes: Weird Outfits, Being “Normal,” and Friendship Dynamics

[52:30 - 53:30]

• Bob casts himself as the “normal” one in their friendship, referencing The Munsters sitcom, while Monét hilariously disagrees.
• They both poke fun at each other’s quirks and habits, weaving personal anecdotes into a tapestry of mutual roasting.

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Notable Quotes and Moments (with Timestamps)

• “I have a lot of trauma around having a chipped tooth and being teased… from third grade until 10th grade, which is a pretty rough time to have half of your front tooth gone.”
  —Bob [01:53]

• “I'm telling you I'm sensitive about my tooth, and you are ignoring that I am sensitive about my tooth.”
  —Bob [03:01]

• “I am a problem solver… I think about the future. I am trying to help you.”
  —Monét [03:20]

• “Your concern for my tooth is not as valid as my feelings for my tooth.”
  —Bob [03:35]

• “In my experience with you… you sometimes don't take care of yourself before others.”
  —Monét [06:00]

• “Helping people, there is a part… that feels good to you as well.”
  —Bob [07:59]

• “Straw man is literally defining Sibling Rivalry.”
  —Monét [14:31]

• “It is good form to follow people’s lead when it comes to talking about their bodies.”
  —Bob [15:21]

• “The way I see it, this conversation would have played out the same with or without cameras.”
  —Bob [22:08]

• “I can be in my feelings at any point I want.”
  —Bob [20:25]

• “I do not feel safe talking to you about my tooth.”
  —Bob [40:20]

• “If you do not like people who are disagreeing, don’t listen to this podcast.”
  —Bob [37:35]

• “I strongly believe in prioritizing yourself always… you will always be considered, but you will never take precedent over me.”
  —Bob [61:24]

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Important Segments (Timestamps)

• [01:33 - 07:59]: The emotional core: debate on chipped tooth, sensitivity, timing, and boundaries.
• [13:33 - 15:48]: Straw man arguments, semantics, and deconstructing conflict.
• [24:59 - 26:30]: Parsing sensitivity vs. public persona regarding personal vulnerabilities.
• [38:10 - 46:26]: Childhood dental trauma and dental care stories.
• [52:30 - 53:30]: Who’s “normal”? The Munsters analogy and playful mutual ribbing.
• [59:51 - 61:24]: Philosophical reflections on life, kindness, and self-prioritization in relationships.

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Tone & Takeaways

• Warm, candid, and unfiltered: Consistent with Sibling Rivalry’s signature, the episode balances real vulnerability with relentless comedic banter and playful shade.
• Useful for anyone navigating how to care for friends while respecting boundaries—or needing a reminder that being “real” with loved ones, even when you disagree, isn’t always effortless.
• Bottom line: The episode’s true theme is less about teeth and more about what it means to be sensitive, to show care on your own terms, and to respect the boundaries of people you love… with plenty of laughs and minor squabbles along the way.

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For more episodes:
Find Sibling Rivalry wherever you get your podcasts.

Transcript

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[Monet X Change]

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[Monet X Change]

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

1-800-contacts. My name is Bob the Drag Queen and I'm Monet X Change. And this is simply rivalry.

[Monet X Change]

For those of you who are just tuning in, everyone, the podcast just started. I just said to Bob, I said, are you gonna get your tooth fixed? And he said, when they don't make fun of my tooth, I'm not just asking the question.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then I said, and I said, well, I'm feeling very sensitive in my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

And I said, I don't believe you. No, that's nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, you did.

[Monet X Change]

I said, I said. I said. I said, are you really? He said, yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then you said, I don't believe.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, okay, but that's not what I first said.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, you got me.

[Monet X Change]

Because also, we all know when someone

[Bob the Drag Queen]

goes, yeah, I remember I didn't do. I said, yes, I am.

[Monet X Change]

No, you said, yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I am feeling well also. Everyone knows my voice goes up in it. This is how I talk. I've been known to be like, yeah, girl, it's how I talk. I have a lot of trauma around having a chipped tooth and being teased about having a chipped tooth. I had a chipped tooth for a big part of my life, from third grade until 10th grade, which is a pretty rough time to have half of your front tooth gone.

[Monet X Change]

Well, I just think now, because the new year has started and you will get busier now, I think would be the best time to get it done as opposed to when you're busy on the road traveling and you can't find time to do it. Now you have a. You have time. You're sitting around in la. You, you can take care of it now as opposed to waiting later when you can't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That doesn't. The conversation you're having about when I should fix my tooth is not discussing about me saying, I am sensitive about my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, well, my original question was, are you fixing. Are you gonna fix it? And you said, yes. And as you being a busy person, I would think that you would prioritize doing it now as opposed to when you don't want to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I will be able to get my tooth fixed in a time that works for me.

[Monet X Change]

And right now doesn't work for you in this moment?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, I'll be gone. I have to go to Atlanta in, like, two days.

[Monet X Change]

You can literally, Bob, by the time this. When this happened before.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I can't fly to. I have things to do between now and going to land. I'm going to land on the fourth. Today's the second. I have something to do tomorrow. I'll be in Atlanta from the 4th until this time. I come back. I have gigs, so I can't just.

[Monet X Change]

But after you came back from Mexico,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

you had time to do it, but it was. I had stuff to do then. First of all, why are you worried about when I'm fixing my tooth? I'm telling you I'm sensitive about my tooth, and you are ignoring that I am sensitive about my tooth. So instead of you being like, oh, wow, maybe you should be like, you know what? Maybe Bob is sensitive about the tooth instead of, like, pressuring and being like, fix it now. Why is your tooth not fixed?

[Monet X Change]

Because I'm thinking about the future. I am a. I am a problem solver. And I know your feelings are yours. They're valid. But I'm thinking about you prolonging the experience of your insecurity by not just taking care of it. When? Immediately, as opposed to next month, two months later.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's not valid.

[Monet X Change]

That is valid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Your concern for my tooth is not as valid as my feelings for my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

No. I mean. Okay, but you can't tell me how valid my feelings are.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Bitch.

[Monet X Change]

That's my feelings about your tooth and

[Bob the Drag Queen]

concern for me and my experience in my tooth. My feelings are a lot more.

[Monet X Change]

Well, your experiences in your tooth, how they affect me. I want to help you take care of it now. Because in the long term, you are

[Bob the Drag Queen]

on the wrong side of it.

[Monet X Change]

No, because on the long term, I have to. I had to think about you being insecure about your tooth.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are on the wrong side of this.

[Monet X Change]

I am not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If I was telling you to fix things on your body and I'm like, you need to fix it, because I'm thinking about you in the future. I'm trying to tell you to fix things in your body that you're insecure about, even though you have a long history. So actually, what I'm saying is valid.

[Monet X Change]

And.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I'm telling you how to fix your body because I'm thinking about your body. I have plans for your body. So do your body the way that I want you to do your body.

[Monet X Change]

That's that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, it is. This is my body. This tooth is in my face.

[Monet X Change]

And I know it's bothering you, so I'm thinking, hey, so as a friend, I'm saying, hey, you should take care of it now so you don't have to prolong the hurt and the agony that this tooth is causing you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And what I am telling you is,

[Monet X Change]

can you not hit the table in

[Bob the Drag Queen]

terms of people's bodies if they're like, I am insecure about this. I feel badly about this thing.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

And.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And you're like, yeah, you need to fix it sooner than later. That for me, maybe you're true.

[Monet X Change]

Maybe for you and your friends, this is. This. This is back to your truth.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Maybe for you and your other friends, you all pick each other's bodies apart, and you're very comfortable telling each other what they should do with their bodies, when they should fix it, in what time they should fix it. But for me, I'm going to fix this tooth when it works for me. And I'm insecure about it because I've had a chipped tooth for a long time in my life. And it's the. It's like the first thing you see on my face when I open my mouth and my tooth. Tooth is chipped.

[Monet X Change]

So I'm sensitive about hitting the table.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I don't think. And I don't think there is any acknowledgment that what I'm saying is valid or that I. I did.

[Monet X Change]

I literally said I. I said your feelings about your tooth are valid. I. That's literally one of the first things I said. So you're glazing over that because you want to prioritize the hurt and pain that you're feeling?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I do want to. I'm. I'm. I'm taking. I've learned this thing when you. When you're having a moment, someone. You have to prioritize your own pain, your own self, protect yourself, because you can't rely on someone else do that for you. So I'm telling you is I am Very sensitive about my tooth. And I would like to care for this tooth in my own way without pressure. And this is. And I can't talk about operating alive, but this is a way that I operate, and this is a courtesy. I would appreciate to have people, you know, who are close to my life talk to me about my body in a way that doesn't feel bad.

[Monet X Change]

Well, you know, as someone who's been friends with you for a long time, I notice you don't prioritize taking care of yourself, so I'm trying to help you. You don't prioritize taking care of yourself. You help other people before yourself. Is that not true? No, I feel that way about you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

For example, you helped me out of

[Monet X Change]

detriment to you when I needed help from Misselle's kitchen. You had stuff you need to do for your own shit, but you're helping me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I still did my stuff.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but you. But you. But you put my stuff first to help me. First with the pageant, which is fair. Yes, you did.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, that was not my experience.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, it was. You fully had. You had, like, my experience. I'm telling you what you said to me back in that time. You're like, monet, I really don't have time to do this. You're like, all right, come over. I think I can do this. Before my thing. That was the whole experience of culminating on my White Missiles kitchen gown. Absolutely was. Your sewing machine was even broken. You're like, monet, I can't even make this stuff for Bibi. Because you were sewing stuff for Bibi at that time. I don't have time to make stuff for Bibi because your sewing machine broke. So I drove to New Jersey because the talk about me was out of sewing machines. I drove to New Jersey to buy you a sewing machine so you couldn't make your BB stuff and my gown. That is. That is what happened. That is absolutely what happened. Full stop. Period. So I've noticed a pattern in your life that you sometimes don't take care of yourself before. Why are you looking at me like that, all smug?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is.

[Monet X Change]

That is what I've noticed in your life. Jacob, would you. Would you agree that sometimes Bob takes care of other people before himself? Not. Not on principle. What do you mean, not on principle? Yeah, not all the time, but I feel like there are many situations.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is that a pattern that you notice that I prioritize other people?

[Monet X Change]

I didn't say it's a pattern.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You literally just said.

[Monet X Change]

No, I said that you often.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You Just said pattern. But I'll let you redact it and replace it with often. So what does often mean?

[Monet X Change]

Often mean, like, a lot more times than not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I would say I prioritize other people's well being over my own.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. When I say well being, I'm not saying that you're like, you're shot and you're making sure this person goes to the hospital before you get the bullet out your chest. I'm not saying stuff like that, but like helping someone, I don't know, stream a thing online. You're like, oh, girl, I don't have time, like, pep, come over or FaceTime me right now. I can do it right now in this moment. Like, stuff like that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, if I have time to help someone and I want, and I want to help, help them. Sometimes helping people, there is a part of helping people that feels good to you as well. So sometimes we agree on that. Sometimes if I help someone, it's not that it's a detriment to me. It's like, but you don't have time

[Monet X Change]

to do your own, so you're helping someone else do it. That, that is at a detriment to you if you are helping someone do something when you have your own or your own stuff to do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is everyone has stuff to do.

[Monet X Change]

Right? Okay. So, wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

People always have things to do.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so I'm saying, I, I, no one is arguing. I am saying what that that is something that you do. So I'm trying to help you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think I feel that it sounds like. Let me, let me try to get this clear. You're saying that if you help other people and you have other things to do as well, if you are helping them before you do your own thing, that is a detriment to you.

[Monet X Change]

Yes. Because you are not prioritizing things that you need to do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I'm going to argue that that's not the case, in my opinion, because people always have things to do.

[Monet X Change]

Like, but important things.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I never.

[Monet X Change]

You have important things to do that you're not doing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think that everyone has important things.

[Monet X Change]

Not always. You don't always. Exactly. Every time I have helped someone, I don't have things that I am putting on the back burner to help that person all the time. Is that the case?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, important is a subjective word.

[Monet X Change]

Right. Well, I know for you, something that you express it that that is important to, that you should be getting done that you're not doing. I, I, So you're saying, so you're

[Bob the Drag Queen]

saying I don't identify with.

[Monet X Change]

So you say that you've never done this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I. I did not say that.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so what are you saying? So do you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I do not make a habit. I do not. More often than not. It is not a character of mine. It is not. People will say that I hurt myself or give or.

[Monet X Change]

Hurt and detriment are not the same thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's essentially the same thing. I'm. I'm sorry.

[Monet X Change]

They're not synonyms.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Essentially.

[Monet X Change]

Essentially. No. You can't just throw in. You can't throw in a weasel. Like, essentially. Like, they can't just throw an essentially.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I think someone says, you did this and it hurt you, or you did this and it was a detriment to you. People would be like, oh, that's. That's pretty much the same thing.

[Monet X Change]

It's. But pretty much and it are the same thing or not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think in this.

[Monet X Change]

In the dictionary, you can't. You can't. You can't. Hurt and detriment are not synonyms in the dictionary.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think in this case, the words work together.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, but that's not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But that's. You don't get to make your own definitions.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, but you don't get to make your own definition either. Go ahead, Jacob. Detriment, the state of being harmed or damaged.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That sounds very. That sounds like the word hurt. Anyway, so I'll just go off and say that was literally what I just said, but go off, Monet. And I don't think that that giving till it hurts is a part of my character. I don't identify with that. I give people stuff, but I also really like it. It's not hurting me. There are often times where I have a lot of important things to do in my life.

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I don't do those things, then not have time to do my own. I'm not Asia o' Hara in the fucking End of the World Ball. I still do my things. I have time. I pray I budget time so I can do my things as well.

[Monet X Change]

But you're saying. I never said you don't do that. I just say that I have noticed.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm just saying, not a character.

[Monet X Change]

I have noticed you. Character means that I. I'm saying that I have noticed you do that. So I'm just trying to say that to you right now in this situation. Hey, do you think you should do it now as opposed to when you don't have time to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But also, I don't identify with being like, I don't.

[Monet X Change]

You can do things and not be a character, a characteristic of you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You said I do it more often than not.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't. That's not true.

[Monet X Change]

I don't identify with my experience of me seeing you. Maybe that's not how you. Maybe that's not how it comes up to yourself. But me interacting with you for the past 10 years, I feel like that's what I have known.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So when I asked you to explain it, the only example you gave was this Hell's Kitchen gown, which was legitimately eight years ago.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, but that's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When else did I do it?

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

More often than not. Meaning it happens all the time. If it's more often than over 50% of the time, when else do I do this?

[Monet X Change]

Okay, for example, when we have makeup stuff to do and you're prioritizing other things for like your black queer town hall thing that are. And we have pressing things for makeup stuff to do, I think that you prioritizing black. Yes. Black Raton hall is big. It's another big part of your life.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's like other people's stuff. It is other people. I mean, it's my stuff. I am the president of an. I am the president of a non profit organization.

[Monet X Change]

And you're 50% the president of makeup stuff. But I'm saying that's important too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You see, what you're saying is I do things for other people. That's not prioritizing other people's stuff over my stuff.

[Monet X Change]

I will say black queer town hall services more people. Y' all are servicing a lot of black queer people. So in that regard, I think that is servicing more people than your makeup thing with you and me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I, I am the president of a non profit and it is literally my job.

[Monet X Change]

It's your job to make a thing too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. And I, and I. But. But I think the. Based off the. The under the you're trying to say is like I am prioritizing other people's stuff. And what you're saying is because black queer town hall benefits other people, even though it's my job that is somehow prioritizing other people over myself.

[Monet X Change]

Because it services my job. Because it's. But it services more people. Like, what was the statistic you gave the Y' all help hundreds of whatever. Black rare people.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, a lot of people.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Right. So that's servicing more people in Blackwear town hall than you are servicing with your makeup industry or makeup line, makeup product, whatever.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I mean, that's. We have.

[Monet X Change]

You're helping and you're servicing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We Haven't. We haven't launched yet. Who knows how many people will. Who knows how many people.

[Monet X Change]

Well, and right now, in this present moment is only servicing you. And I'm not serving anyone else.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is true, but. And I think that supports the argument you're saying that I help other people more than I help myself.

[Monet X Change]

I think it does.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's my. It's literally my job. I'm paid to do.

[Monet X Change]

I think it does. But again, but you're still helping and servicing a lot of people with.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

With your job and the makeup can

[Monet X Change]

help and service people too, but it's not. Currently, it's only helping you and me and Galeo.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, I think this is a. What's the word? What's the word when you. I don't know if this is. I don't know if this is quite a straw man.

[Monet X Change]

Straw man.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Straw man. It's like a tactic in arguing and debate. When you say something that is, like, not particularly sensical, but if you look at it from really far away and don't zone in, it could make sense. But it doesn't make sense.

[Monet X Change]

I never heard the term straw man, so I don't know what that means.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, how would. What a straw man. Just Google it. Don't. Don't do your own thing. Just Google the. The real. The 100 thing so we can, like, get the official definition of a straw man. But it's like when you, like, try to. You try to, like, create a thing and you, like, get someone going off on a whole different thing, and they are so far away from the original concept of what they're discussing that they. They are.

[Monet X Change]

Which is every single. Everything. We start one place and we. We go to a next galaxy pretty much every time. So civil rivalry is straw man.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, sure. But I think it's kind of like a strawman where it's like this. It's. It's so far from what the original thing was that it's hard to. To make it make sense. What is. What is. What is the straw man?

[Monet X Change]

The typical strawman argument creates the illusion of. Of completely refuting or defeating an opponent's proposition through the code replacement of it with a different proposition. Yeah, I. E. Stand up a strawman and the subsequent reputation of that false argument. So this is literally the. This. This straw man is literally defining civil rivalry.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sure. But in the context of this conversation, I was like that. That was. I think I pretty much know the definition. It is like when you. When you create this narrative that is similar to the thing but it's not quite the thing. And it is, in a way to negate my point and then make it seem like it's different. But back to the original point. I think that it is good form to follow people's lead when it comes to talking about their bodies.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I would agree.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I think that if someone's like, I'm actually really sensitive about this thing, it might make sense to be like, you know what? But also, this is just. This is just how I would do it. You don't have to do that. I would be like, all right, you know, I hear you. And if you don't want me to press it, then I won't press it. Instead of being like, I have five more suggestions for how you should fix the thing that you told me. You're very smart.

[Monet X Change]

I would say, yes, sure. But I also think that when you have a friendship, like you and I do, when you have really close friends or your partner, whatever, I think that it's a little something in my experience with my friends and how we have behaved and other friends, I behave to be like, but, girl, you're sure about that thing? Cause I think that when, sure, if you're talking to fucking Kelly who lives down the block from you or across the street from you, but like, you're like, oh, girl, you're. Or y', all, whatever the situation is, sure, that's something you follow there. But with friends, best friends, close friends, I think that it's okay to be like, girl, you sure? And if they really press and be like, no, I really, I'm like, okay, I got you. In my experience.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We'll talk about this when we come back.

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[Monet X Change]

We're back.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I did say, like, several times. Then when I told you I was sensitive, you literally said, I don't believe you.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, because again, I didn't know if you were doing a thing. I am, Monet, I am. Again, if we keep on talking about it, we're talking about it in front of how many listeners and people, whatever. This is typical form that we have done. If the cameras weren't here, we would say something like, monet, no, but if

[Bob the Drag Queen]

the cameras weren't on the tour.

[Monet X Change]

Exactly. And I said, hold on, let's talk about it on the podcast. And you were like, monet, really? And then we will do that for a second. I'd be like, no, Bob, I really am. You'd be like, okay, girl. So this is a typical way that we would. That we, you and I would handle something like this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When I said, I really am, you didn't go, okay, but you went, well, I'm gonna keep pressuring it. And you should get your toothpick, because

[Monet X Change]

this is how we normally. Bob, this is how we normally behave. If cameras weren't on, we would be in your house. You'll be chasing around the room. I'll be like, bob, for real. That is how we behave.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know, but the difference is when something you point out, I think is true. Whenever I was like, if you say something, you're like, I know, I really am sensitive, then I'll. Then I'll be like, okay. But you never. We never got to okay.

[Monet X Change]

But we didn't get there yet. Because then we then went to the whole definition of straw man and situations about it. Whatever. If we weren't. If the cameras are not on, this probably been like a 15 minute thing that you and I would have done. Right or wrong?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, it depends.

[Monet X Change]

More often than not, yes, it would be so that. But the cameras are on. We've been talking about it for five minutes. This is a different scenario.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was 15 minutes, our first break.

[Monet X Change]

And also, if you were really sensitive about it, you'd be like, I don't want to talk about it on camera. Hold on.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think that's true.

[Monet X Change]

Hold on. But if you're really sensitive about it, something that really hurts your feelings, or you felt like I wasn't seeing you where you're at and your feelings and seeing that you are really sad and vulnerable about it, I'm throwing in sad, or you are really sensitive about it, I would have been like, girl, I really don't. I'm like, okay, work, for example. Me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's not true. For example, what do you mean there have been. I don't think that if my feelings were. If I was really. Which I was sensitive about it or if my feelings were hurt, I wouldn't be like, I don't want to talk about this on camera. That's not part. I think it's because of being on multiple reality TV shows, feeling very, very sensitive on camera, fully crying. I mean, boohooing with strangers on camera. I think that showing my sensitivity to people is a big part of what makes our podcast so special. So I wouldn't have been like, I don't want to talk about this on camera. I'm comfortable talking about things that I am uncomfortable with or feeling sensitive about. So I wouldn't have been like, I don't talk about this on camera. I would have been like, we can

[Monet X Change]

talk about it, right? But then again. But then you can't get mad if we're having this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This. I'm not mad.

[Monet X Change]

You can't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do I look mad?

[Monet X Change]

You can't be upping your feelings. You can't be upping your feelings when having a dialogue that we would normally have. If the cameras weren't on, this exact conversation would have had. We would have went on. You'd be like, monet, I really am sensitive about it. Like, all right, girl, sorry. And then we would have moved on. That's exactly what would have happened.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can be in my feelings at any point I want.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, God, here we go.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I don't think that. I genuinely don't think I'm reacting in any different way.

[Monet X Change]

I think you are.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And what's. What do you think would happen before

[Monet X Change]

if the cameras are not on? I would have said what I said. You'd be like, well, like Monet. You like Monet? You got some of my tooth. I'm like, yeah, I think you should do that. Like Monet. I really don't have time to do it, and I don't want to get it now. And I'm really sensitive about it. I'm like, girl, no, you're not. You know, like Monet. Yes, I am. I'm really sensitive about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm like, really?

[Monet X Change]

Are you really Monet?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, I am.

[Monet X Change]

I'm like, all right, then we would have moved on. That's exactly how the conversation would have went. That's Jacob. How does that sound? Does it not sound accurate to you? Like Monet. Yes, I am.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Let him answer.

[Monet X Change]

Fair.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's because you're wrong. He doesn't want to do.

[Monet X Change]

That's not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, I was saying, Jacob and I have had a lot of conversations in life about things like this, and I do not think that I put on or change who I am.

[Monet X Change]

No one said you're putting on or.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think I've changed the way I'm talking to you. I don't think I've changed. What I'm saying is I don't think the way that you responded to me telling you that I am sensitive about having a chipped tooth, it doesn't feel good. And I told you that. And then the camera turned on and then I told you again, and then we talk about more things and I told you again. But I've been consistently telling you for almost 17 minutes now that I am sensitive about having my chips.

[Monet X Change]

My point is that the way that you're reacting on camera, how I just laid it out, was exactly what have happened. And we would have moved on with.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's conjecture.

[Monet X Change]

But, Bob, that. That is conjecture from how I have reacted with how we have dialogued for the past 10 years.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So what do you think happened? Do you think that the way this played out was different because of something I was doing?

[Monet X Change]

That. The way that. How we played out, the way it

[Bob the Drag Queen]

played out with the cameras, it was different than it would have been off camera because it's something I was doing. I'm asking.

[Monet X Change]

I don't know. I feel like what was your part in it? My part? My. My part in what? It make you feel bad?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no, you did. First of all, I did not say.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not a witch. Continue.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Continue what I said, what was your part in this playing out differently on camera? What was your part in that?

[Monet X Change]

I don't know what my part in it, but you know what my part was. I feel like. I feel like. I feel like I can only know. I can only say what I'm seeing. I feel like I reacted or I spoke how I normally would in any

[Bob the Drag Queen]

conversation and then I did something different.

[Monet X Change]

I feel like maybe it. I feel like maybe you are a little more sensitive about your tooth thought,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

which I told you.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but again, how I. How it would normally play out. I said, y' all can rewind. To listen to it again would have been a thing. You had to do the thing. Monet. Yes, I really am. I'm like, Bob, no, you're not like Monet, I'm telling you, I feel bad about my tooth. I'd Be like, are you sure? Like, yes, Monet, I'm serious. I'm like, okay, work and then we'll move on. That's how it would have normally went in my, in my experience with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So what I'm hearing is you feel like this played out differently and I'm just asking because of something I did.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not because of something you did. And you don't see your part in any of that.

[Monet X Change]

I never said on spot.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You said, I don't know.

[Monet X Change]

I guess my part was asking you more than. Was asking you more than twice how you felt about your tooth. But I feel like this is how I normally would have spoken to you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I will say the difference is I'm not accusing you of behaving differently, but.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's cause I'm not behaving differently,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

but for some odd reason, you think I'm behaving differently than I would have.

[Monet X Change]

I don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is literally how I talk. All I'm. I don't have a on camera voice. I don't have an off camera voice.

[Monet X Change]

I don't, I don't have.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't. I, I don't, I don't have an on camera vernacular.

[Monet X Change]

I don't, I don't either.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't have an Internet Persona that I'm doing. And the difference, the only difference is at one point I said something which I, which we wouldn't be able to say if there weren't cameras. I said, you're not on the right side of this.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, work.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're. You are. In my opinion. This is all opinion. So it's not a fact. This is not based on fact. This is the, in the court of public opinion. And in my opinion, I think that people will be like, that's not the take. And if someone is like, damn, I feel bad. I'm very sensitive. And I've also told you even before today that I'm sensitive about this tooth.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but when we talked about it before, you laugh and you kiki and joke. But again, that is your tooth. You can do whatever you want. So you can laugh and kiki. So I'm bringing it to the podcast where we laugh and kiki and talk about stuff all the time. Last time we talked about your tooth, you were bent over cracking up about it, about you posting it on. Posting it on Twitter, blocking people. The person that you blocked them, lol. And think of the thing and had this discourse with you about doing it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I, they, I didn't write them back.

[Monet X Change]

They wrote, so you in my. So you, you were giving me the perception that you're not super bothered by your tooth, by how you're talking about it and how you're still posting about it online. So I don't. So I didn't. So this. So this wave of I'm really insecure. I'm really down in the dumps about dumps about it once I'm really down into dumps about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't say I was down in dumps.

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Which has been my case from the beginning. I've said I am sensitive about this from the moment I chipped my tooth. From the moment I told you I blocked someone online. From the moment you blocked who. I mean, I turned off the comments right from the. From the moment I chipped this tooth. I've told you because of my past and having a chipped tooth for so long, I am sensitive of my tooth. It is. That has never changed.

[Monet X Change]

It has never changed. But again, last time he spoke about us on the podcast, you laugh and you, Kiki. So I thought again, yes, you're sensitive, but I didn't think that it was something that would make you hypersensitive about talking about. About fixing it on the podcast.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm not, I'm not hypersensitive.

[Monet X Change]

It seems like you are little to me. But again, that's okay. This is my perception. Hold on, hold on, hold on. This is what, this is what I'm getting from you. What I'm getting that I feel like maybe you're more sensitive or you are more sensitive than you're willing to admit about your tooth because of how I've

[Bob the Drag Queen]

already told you, I'm very sensitive about

[Monet X Change]

it because of how we talked about in a podcast and we were laughing and joking about it. So I didn't think that you. It would have been. It would make you so upset.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm not upset. Or I never said I wasn't. I've never even pretended that I wasn't sensitive about it. I have never at any point in time insinuated that I am not sensitive. All I have ever done from the get go is say out loud, I am sensitive. Do you see about my chip too?

[Monet X Change]

Do you see how I could feel that you. That. That it is okay to talk about it and laugh about it because of how we discussed on the podcast before. Do you do see that is my question.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can see how you would draw that conclusion, but I don't see how you can come to the conclusion that I am somehow in a different place than I've been when I've told you the entire time. I am very sensitive about this chipped tooth because of my past with having a chipped tooth.

[Monet X Change]

But I don't think you're in a different place. The last place we were in this podcast on your tooth, we were laughing and joking and kikiing about it. So I thought you were still in that place, but maybe today you're not in that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But also, like, what you were saying about, like, fixing your tooth, you weren't laughing. You weren't joking. You were being like, you don't prioritize yourself. You need to get your tooth fixed. You have to do it now.

[Monet X Change]

I did not say you need. Okay. You should. Okay, hold on. I did not say that you need to do it now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay.

[Monet X Change]

I was thinking about how busy you are. I'm like, oh, maybe hold on.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Kicking me.

[Monet X Change]

But again, Bob, I think this is how we talk about things on the podcast all the time. This is how we. I'm like, girl, are you gonna feature too? And you're gonna be like. And that. This is a. This is typical for the podcast. This is not outside the realm of how we talk. Discuss.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think that what you said was out of any realm. I don't think it was out of the normal. I think that this.

[Monet X Change]

I don't see why it's like this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't. I never even said it was surprising. I think this behavior is very typical for you. I don't. I have never used. The only thing I've said consistently. Consistently, which is true, is that I'm sensitive on my tooth and that I will fix it when I have time. That's what I haven't. I haven't. I haven't said you were acting. Wow. I haven't accused you of acting differently. I didn't say I'm surprised. I didn't say I was sad. I didn't say I was upset. I didn't say I was in my feelings. I said I'm sensitive about my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. Okay. And again. But the reason why I discuss your tooth on the podcast and do it in the way that we did.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you. I'm not saying you can't discuss my tooth. I. I'm just saying I'm sensitive about it.

[Monet X Change]

Okay?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's all I'm saying. I am very sensitive about the tooth.

[Monet X Change]

So in your sensitivity about your tooth, how would you like us to. How. How do you feel about discussing your tooth on the podcast?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think it depends on what we're talking about. The context in which we're talking about it, how I feel that day, did I have a lot to eat? Did I look at myself in the mirror? Did I get a comment about it online about my fucked up chipped tooth? I think there's a lot of things that go into play about how I feel about my tooth. I don't.

[Monet X Change]

How do you feel today in this moment?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't have any qualms talking about my tooth, but I don't want shit about not having fixed it already. I don't want. I don't. I don't want to hear stuff like,

[Monet X Change]

do you feel like I was giving you shit about it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. What it felt like. Well, when you came back from Mexico, you had a lot of time to get it fixed.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. That's how you felt. Okay, well, that's not what. That's not what I was projecting to you. So what was that? Hold on, hold on, hold on. When you say you felt, what was that like? What is the feeling that you felt?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Let me say that it felt like you had. You certainly had time when you got back from Mexico, but you didn't do it. It felt like there was some insinuation that I have misappropriated my time or that I have somehow prioritized something else or, or based off of the insinuation, like I was maybe putting other people's needs in front of mine and not getting my tooth fixed. And there seemed to be some sort of a insinuation that I. Mismanaging my time. When you say something like, well, you had plenty of time. You got back from Mexico, get your tooth fixed. And I'm like, well, I had stuff to do. I've always got stuff to do. There's always something to do. And I'm thinking myself, maybe I don't want to spend my New Year's in a dentist chair in New York City by myself. I'm also thinking to myself, well, my dentist probably cannot fix my tooth between Christmas and New Year's because that is a very, very. Like, most people are off on holiday, and a lot of people who do book stuff, they book it really specifically. Something to myself, well, between Christmas and New Year's is probably not a great time to get emergency dental work. Last time I got my tooth fixed, I chipped it. I fixed it the very next day, but it was like a random Thursday in October. So I don't even.

[Monet X Change]

I don't remember when. I don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't remember when it was, but it was like there was no holidays around. It was just a random day. I broke. I think it was in the summer, actually. I remember breaking my tooth. I was here in la. I flew back to New York City. My dentist and I lived in the same town. So now for me to go back to my dentist who lives in New York City or find a dentist here in Los Angeles, it's just a bit more of a. To do so. It felt like there was some sort of an insinuation that I am mismanaging my time because I didn't get my tooth fixed when I came back from Mexico between Christmas and New Year's. And it is now January 2nd. It is the second day of the year.

[Monet X Change]

So you're so you. But I'm saying, what is that feeling?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It feels.

[Monet X Change]

Did I. Do you feel like I was trying to make you feel bad about yourself?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think. I don't think. I don't think that you have mal. Intentions. I would be really shocked if you and I were ever in a situation where you were trying to make me feel bad. But I do think that in that moment when it would have been. I think it was insensitive.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, well, I apologize. I apologize if I made you. What do you. What do you look at the camera like?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because it's one of those moments in my head where I.

[Monet X Change]

Let's take a break. Let's take a break. Let's take a break. Let's take a break. I'm telling you. You're telling me how I made you feel.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I did not say that.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, Bob, if you felt insensitive by what I said, that means that what I said made you feel that way.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't agree with that, but I'll let you.

[Monet X Change]

That's all right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's why I said that's my feelings, though. You can't tell me how I feel.

[Monet X Change]

But you said that I made you feel insensitive.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't say that.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so how.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, I said it was insensitive.

[Monet X Change]

How did you feel?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I felt when you insinuated that I mis. Managed my time by not getting my tooth fixed between Christmas and New Year's. It felt accusatory. It felt like an insinuation that I was in some way being either irresponsible or prioritizing other people's needs over my own.

[Monet X Change]

What is the emotion that comes with that? Because for me saying that, it obviously made you feel something.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I. I don't think it made me feel anything.

[Monet X Change]

So. So how I think I felt.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel. Thing that.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so how did you Feel.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I guess the short answer is I. My immediate response was to feel defensive and to stand up for myself because.

[Monet X Change]

But it isn't like an emotional feeling that came with that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think defensive is an emotion. Okay, like, what kind of emotion are you?

[Monet X Change]

Go ahead.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think I was. I was feeling defensive. I felt like I needed to. It wasn't like, sad or anything. It wasn't, I'm not angry or. It wasn't like rage. It was just like, I need to defend myself right now.

[Monet X Change]

Well, I apologize if you felt defensive for me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's not an apology, in my opinion.

[Monet X Change]

I apologize for making. You said, I apologize.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're adding hands.

[Monet X Change]

You're adding.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What you said was, I apologize if you felt defensive.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, I apologize that you felt defensive by what I said. How's that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You ever hear an apology and what you want me to tell you?

[Monet X Change]

I'm listening.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You ever feel a certain way and like, someone apologizes? You're like, I'm. I'm not. I'm not there.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, well, that's fair. And you can get there in your own time. I can't. But I'm also.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm also not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not, like, mad at you.

[Monet X Change]

I didn't. I. I didn't say you were mad. You didn't say you were mad. You said. You said that. You said that you're feeling defensive. So I apologize if what I said made you feel defensive.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then when I. When I was asking you. You. If you. If you saw your part in it, you were like, I.

[Monet X Change]

Because I don't. And that's my.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's all weird that all you see is my. All you can see is like, you can't pro. You don't seem to have the ability in this moment to process your responsibility. And by the way, I literally. It's what makes it really wild to me that you sat down, started talking about my tooth, my management of my time, and then you're like, you are acting funny. And then. And you're like. And you were saying out loud, I can't see my part in this. All I did was came in here and started talking about your tooth and why you haven't gotten it fixed yet. And I literally cannot see my part

[Monet X Change]

in this, because what I'm saying is that I don't feel like I've behaved or operated any ways outside of how I normally interact with you. So in terms of. I can see that me talking about your tooth made you feel defensive, and it made you Feel some type of way. So that's what I'm saying. I'm apologizing for what I have done that made you feel defensive about your tooth, which I guess was bringing up your tooth. Maybe I should not have brought up your tooth at all. I should have just not brought it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I didn't take any. But there's also the layered. Like, you insinuating that my behavior is strange or I'm doing something weird and you're just acting how you always act, but I'm doing something funny.

[Monet X Change]

I. Well, again, did you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did you insinuate that or not?

[Monet X Change]

I am. I guess I can see how you. How that gets insinuated for you. But from.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Again, it's not as though you said out loud. I mean, I'm. If we weren't on camera, I would have done something different. And I'm like, that's not true.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's how I feel.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, you and I had full arguments off camera that had nothing to do with the camera. That lasted way longer than this and were more intense than this. And I wasn't just like, girl. I'm like, when. I mean, the whole fucking. Probably your downfall. It wasn't just like, girl, are you really. Ooh, oh, hand. Girl, that was over a phone call. So I don't think that this, like, idea that, typically speaking, whenever I'm just, like, not feeling. I just go, monet, if I'm feeling how I'm feeling, and then I say it, and then sometimes it turns into a thing. I genuinely don't even think this is an argument.

[Monet X Change]

I don't think it's an argument. You said something I said made you feel defensive and it made you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't say it made me feel

[Monet X Change]

defensive or something I said. You felt defensive by something I said.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That sounds accurate.

[Monet X Change]

So don't roll your eyes at me

[Bob the Drag Queen]

again ever in your life.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

As long as you live.

[Monet X Change]

Anyways. So you're saying defensive, and I'm literally. I have apologized three times at this point in camera, so I don't know what else to do to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm also not asking for an apology. I never asked for an apology. I never asked you to apologize.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. No. Die. Take it back.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I mean, then. I mean, if you're. If you take it back. The e. There was never an apology

[Monet X Change]

in the first place. I guess it wasn't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, was it?

[Monet X Change]

Or was it. It wasn't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, there it is. I think this is an interesting conversation, personally.

[Monet X Change]

The feedback that we've gotten from the fans Is that they don't particularly. Well, when you argue this much.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well then can skip this episode. Tell the fan they can skip this episode.

[Monet X Change]

I'm just recommending that maybe we steer the conversation towards something else at some point. But do take that as you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think that the one about conflict resolution was a well received episode. And I think people were like, this actually was a really interesting. It it. It. People were like they need a break, that whole thing. But I don't think that it was like people were like, this episode is too much. I don't like how this is going. Did you experience that?

[Monet X Change]

I mean listening to it? I did feel like went on too long.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You didn't answer the question I was asked though.

[Monet X Change]

Do what Do I feel like people felt that way about it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Like we got negative feedback about that.

[Monet X Change]

I think we got. It was a mixed bag because a lot. Some people were like, I can't with this. I did literally inside of people seem like they need a brick. I can't take this anymore. So I just felt that way.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If people don't like arguing. I say this all the time. If you do not like people who are disagreeing, don't listen to this podcast. This is not the podcast for you. That's like going to fucking the great British Baking show and be like, I don't like what people bake. Don't listen to this podcast. Listening to a podcast where people often argue and then complaining. That sounds wild to me.

[Monet X Change]

I mean. But also, I mean, I mean, again, I forget all that. I have said my piece. You seem to. What else are you look.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Or I'm not. I've literally not asked you for anything.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, work. Let's talk about dental care. What's the first thing we went to the dentist. When was the first time? How old do you remember how old you were going to the dentist, Bitch. Do you remember how old the fuck you were when you went to the dentist for the first time? How were you?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why don't you start?

[Monet X Change]

I was. Well, the first time I remember going was when I was three years old.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You have vivid memories from being three and going to the dentist.

[Monet X Change]

I do. I remember going to the dentist because I was. I had something wrong with this tooth. My right front tooth. There's something wrong with it because I was ice skating. It was my baby tooth. I was ice skating and I hit it when I was. Wait, I wasn't three, I was four. And I hit when I was four years old and it was just gray. And then they took it. They were like, oh, and the doctor felt like, what's. The baby tooth will fall out. Fall out eventually. And it never fell out. And that's why when I was nine years old, I had to get surgical dental care. And they cut into my gums and they pulled the baby tooth out, and I had a brace on here and to pull that one down. And so, like, for 9, 10, 11, 12. 9, 10, 11, I just had nothing here when I was very traumatizing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't have specific memories of the first time I went to the dentist. I mean, I have been going to the dentist for a pretty long time. I mean, I. I don't ever remember not going to the dentist. I have memories of going to the doctor when I was younger because I had. My feet are very flat. And this girl. This was a huge concern for them.

[Monet X Change]

They were.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They were under the impression that I was going to end up. I used to wear inserts, these wooden inserts in my shoes. But I have had a lot of work on my teeth done in my life. I chipped my tooth when I was in the third grade, and then I got it fixed and then I. But the issue is, can I make a joke?

[Monet X Change]

Okay, I was asking permission to make a joke, but I'm not going to do it. Go ahead. I'm kidding. Go ahead, bitch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you want me to talk about my tooth or not?

[Monet X Change]

Go ahead, talk about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't want to talk. I don't feel. I don't feel comfortable talking to you about my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God, I am kidding. The amount of joke that you make, bitch, that I said to go ahead, but I didn't even make the joke. I literally was asking you if I could make the joke, and I did it. So continue.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I'm just telling you that I don't feel safe talking to you about my tooth. And I think that is a legitimate and fair point to make. That feels very fair to me to say out loud. I do not feel safe talking to you about my tooth.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So you can talk about. Talk about your. We'll talk about your teeth. Talk about your little. Your little dead tooth that you had to get cut out of your mouth

[Monet X Change]

so you can talk about my dead tooth?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, maybe if you don't want me. I did not tell you that you can't talk. I said I don't fuck up. I would never tell you what you can and can't talk about. I am telling you, I do not feel comfortable with you talking about it.

[Monet X Change]

Okay? How can we make you Feel comfortable about talking about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't want to talk about my tooth with you because you are so insensitive about it.

[Monet X Change]

Bob. It was a joke about me asking for permission. I wasn't going to make a joke. I was making a joke about by the amount of joke that you make that are crazy. The amount of jokes made on New Year's Eve about something that we should not be joking about.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What? That was Jacob?

[Monet X Change]

No, that was you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh.

[Monet X Change]

So I was missing this, like, 9, 10, 11. And then.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This sounds very tough.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. So then it came. And it came back, then it came in, and then I've been pretty quick received. You know, dental stuff like. Like oral stuff is genetic. My dentist was telling me, like, cavities and stuff like that. That's like genetics.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. You know, if you have bad teeth, there. There kind of isn't really a full amount of. It's not that you can't do, like, brushing and flossing and stuff does help, but.

[Monet X Change]

It does. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If you're. If your genetics have, like, degenerative teeth, it's gonna happen. Then it's kind of like I was talking to Jiggly about it because Jiggly was. Because, you know, Jiggly had really bad.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah. But I remember.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And now she got them all replaced.

[Monet X Change]

Great.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And she was like. She was like.

[Monet X Change]

I was.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She was. She goes, yeah, I ate candy and stuff. But I was like. But me too.

[Monet X Change]

I used to eat a lot.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I used to eat a lot and

[Monet X Change]

go to bed and not brush your teeth. And that should have stuck in your teeth all night long. I used to brush my teeth. I would eat candy and go to bed, not brush my teeth. Especially in college, like, working, like, writing a paper until, like, I'm sure some

[Bob the Drag Queen]

dentist is going to be in the comment that is here. Oh, yeah.

[Monet X Change]

We're not saying that you should do this behavior. We're not saying this is this. We're talking. We're talking about our experience.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, Monet is telling me when I should fix my teeth, but she's not telling me.

[Monet X Change]

This is our experience with our teeth. Me, what I would do in college. I'm not saying you should do this. You should brush your teeth and follow your dental. What your dentist is telling you is what I used to do in my life. So I would, like, work on you.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Got.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are a bitch. You are a fucking. You are a bitch. You are such a bitch where you

[Monet X Change]

are saying that word. Can I tell you how you're making me feel like a bitch? You're making me feel like a bitch

[Bob the Drag Queen]

because you a bitch. You are a bitch.

[Monet X Change]

Ooh. Did you, did you have like a tooth? Did your mom give you like the tooth fairy stuff?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can hit you in your face right now.

[Monet X Change]

Did you grow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, I grew up with the tooth fairy. I grew up with the tooth fairy. And we would put teeth under our pillows.

[Monet X Change]

How much did you get?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Maybe a dollar.

[Monet X Change]

A dollar? Yeah, it was a dollar too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now it's like, you know, your ass got a, a trust fund, stocks and bonds. Your ass got a house keys.

[Monet X Change]

It was a.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wake up. There'd be keys to a car under your.

[Monet X Change]

It was a money market account. I got active a Goldman Sachs letter. But yeah, but in, in St. Lucia, we have. We, we will get coins because that, that, that's some we don't have. There's no dollar. America, I think America is the only country that has no Europe too. No, Europe has a dollar.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They don't have a, a pound coin.

[Monet X Change]

They do. They did. They do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't.

[Monet X Change]

Do they? Yeah, Europe has a pound.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They have a £1 coin.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, for sure. But in some Lucia you get like a dollar, a little silver dollar coin that I would get for.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, it's also about the unit because, you know, euros and pounds and pounds and Canadian dollars and Australian dollars, loonies and toonies are very close in amount.

[Monet X Change]

No, they're close.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Closer than a peso. Like one peso versus dollar one or a yen versus a dollar. They're so, they're so different.

[Monet X Change]

But Canada, like a Canadian dollar and a you and a euro. It's like one Canadian dollar is like four or five euros.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What I'm saying, I mean, what I'm saying close.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, I'm talking about yours is more is what I'm saying. So I guess, I don't know, five. It's like five. What is it? A Canadian dollar is

[Bob the Drag Queen]

so they're all, they're all, they're all like really close to like about the same word. Whereas when you go to like pesos. Pesos are like.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're so tiny. Same with yin. Yin are really, really tiny. So that's why when you're in, in Mexico and you buy like a burger, they're like 250. I'm like, what?

[Monet X Change]

And they're like, but that's like $5.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I think it's because. I think it's because they don't have sense.

[Monet X Change]

It's all pesos.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's all pesos.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it is pesos.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think I Might be wrong.

[Monet X Change]

I can't remember. But it. Yeah. Did you have braces as a kid?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, I've never had braces really work. I've never had braces.

[Monet X Change]

Hated it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I have had a lot. I've had a lot done on my, my mouth, but never braces. I mean, I've had.

[Monet X Change]

It's a trend now. People. Kids want braces. Like when I was growing up, I had to get braces. I was like, ugh, I hated it. I was like, I hate. I was so self conscious about it. Kids now, they want the metal braces. They don't want. They don't want. They don't want Invisalign. They want you to. It's like, it's like a. It's like a cute trend.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I thought that braces look kind of cool, but I thought they look

[Monet X Change]

cool when you were younger.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, kind of. A little bit, maybe.

[Monet X Change]

What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But not bad enough to. To want them. People used to take paperclips and put them in their teeth and pretend they were braces. Oh, you'd unfold a paperclip and pretend

[Monet X Change]

like you had braces kind of.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Or like a retainer of some sort.

[Monet X Change]

Got it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I've had a lot of my teeth, maybe not a lot. I don't know what's. I don't know what, what a lot is for some people, but I've had seven of my teeth replaced, if you include. I've had one tooth replaced three times and I'm about to get it replaced a fourth time if I guess Monet

[Monet X Change]

will schedule it for me when she

[Bob the Drag Queen]

sees it appropriate for me to get my tooth fixed.

[Monet X Change]

And.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And you know, going to the dentist is. It's actually really. It doesn't even feel. It doesn't even feel stressful for me at this point especially. You love the dentist.

[Monet X Change]

I like going to my dentist.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I like my dentist. I don't love going to the dentist. I like my dentist very much. He. I feel very comfortable in his hands, but I'm not like, oh, I can't wait to go to the dentist.

[Monet X Change]

I think I feel that way because I've never had to have like traumatic mouth stuff done. I never had anything replaced or anything. So anytime I go, it's just a cleaning and. And I'll be. I'll be cool. And also my dentist is like a lesbian. She's really dope. We talk about like her kids and. Well, she just had a kid and her dog and she. And she would like come to drag shows and stuff like that. So I don't know. I used to like my dance is gay too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And he's. He comes to drag shows and stuff as well.

[Monet X Change]

Dr. Kristen Harrison in New York City.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Dr. Wiljes Joshua.

[Monet X Change]

Can I finish from one of my dentists?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Go ahead, say his name.

[Monet X Change]

Dr. Joshua will just go ahead anyway. Go ahead.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, sir. No. Give her. Give her a shout out.

[Monet X Change]

See if the camera's not on. This is not how this interaction.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are a monster today. You are an. You are an absolute monster. And I cannot believe that I have to work. That I have to work in these conditions.

[Monet X Change]

One of my biggest fears about ice skating and every time I go ice skating, I think about. This is skating falling and just falling forward, busting your teeth on the thing and just blood and teeth everywhere. I have that irrational fear. That's why I don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why ice skating more than regular skating?

[Monet X Change]

I don't know. Because ice skating, I just see the teeth hitting the ice and just like the blood staining the ice, and they can't get it. They have to shut down the whole ring. Get the zamboni. That's what I have in my mind. I can't go ice skating. I feel like it's gonna happen to me also, for whatever reason, you fall and Ashley didn't see you fall, and she just skates over your fingers and just chops them off clean. I know that literally cannot happen, but in my mind it can.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I wouldn't say it literally can't happen,

[Monet X Change]

but blades, ice blades are pretty thick. Okay, not this thick. They're like this thick. An ice skate cannot chop your fingers off like that. Not unless they, like, jump on your thing, maybe.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I think it depends on a lot of. That's probably. I went ice skating recently. For what?

[Monet X Change]

When? Who?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was in Atlanta with my family for Thanksgiving work. And we. Me and my brother and my niece. Nephew Jacob and Ezra went ice skating.

[Monet X Change]

Work. Did you. Can you ice skate?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No. I mean, I can. I can say afloat. I mean afloat. I mean upright.

[Monet X Change]

My mic is flaccid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, there's a little video of you ice skating.

[Monet X Change]

We got. We're going to. You are such a monster today.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I cannot believe.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do any of you have, like, a co worker? And you're like, this is wild. Does anyone at home have a coworker? And you're like, this is. I can't believe these are the conditions I have to work in.

[Monet X Change]

You look cute in this coat.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is a women's coat from Walmart. That was, I think 40 bucks. Because I got to. I got to.

[Monet X Change]

Bob is not skating. You're walking.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can't walk. I can't ice skate.

[Monet X Change]

Is walking.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We will post the video. We've gotten better at it.

[Monet X Change]

It got them better.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We'll post the video. This would be a Patreon exclusive. But, you know, I. I've had a Rational fears. I used to work at this restaurant called the Jekyll and High Club. And it was like a five story restaurant.

[Monet X Change]

We get. We know you had to go. Yes, yes, we know about what I'm gonna say then that you had to bust. The kitchen was here. You had to work all the floors. You were. You were the food runner at that point. Where were you?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So you don't know. Good, because I wasn't the food runner.

[Monet X Change]

All right? Anyway, you were the. What do you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you want to guess or do

[Monet X Change]

you want me to tell you? I thought you just said. I didn't hear you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was a waiter.

[Monet X Change]

You're the waiter.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. And you did not have to go up and downstairs. You would take your food to the dumbwaiter and.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it was a dumb waiter. Yeah. And then the dumb waiter would you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are impossible. Impossible today. And sometimes when you leave here, I'll say, jacob, was it Monet crazy today? And Jacob goes, well, she's always.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, so these are conversations y' all have around a little office cooler.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He's like, well, that's how Monet always. And I have to say, you're right. That is how Monet always is.

[Monet X Change]

That's wild. Cause if I had the same conversations about you with other people, I mean,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

but according to you. Wait, but am I. But didn't you have to ask yourself, is that how I always am?

[Monet X Change]

I don't know. That's the question I ask myself all the time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it only how I'm on camera?

[Monet X Change]

What's this nigga putting on for the camera? That'll literally be my question. When people watch the episode, they be like, is Bob crazy? I'm like, girl, he is nuts. He's out of his mind. So I think to you and your boyfriend, y', all, you're regular. Nigga, you crazy, too. Just so we're clear, I'm not. Nigga, you crazy as hell.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Absolutely not, Bobby.

[Monet X Change]

So you think that I'm Dubs. So you think that I'm just.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Bro, people should never laugh. You are insane.

[Monet X Change]

So you think in this world that I just crazy, crazy. And you're just sitting there like, yes, n. You are out of your fucking mind. If you think that's the reality.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel like if this was a cartoon, if this was a show, I would be the one. If this was the Monsters, I'm the daughter. You ever seen the Monsters?

[Monet X Change]

I don't know. The eyeball thing. I don't remember.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's our monster. The Monsters was a sitcom.

[Monet X Change]

The Monsters.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You mean the Monsters?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, the months. Like, the old Black and White show. Yeah, the Munsters.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm the daughter.

[Monet X Change]

I've never seen a show. I've seen.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, the thing about it was every, like, the whole bit is that, like, everyone around her is so wild. It's like a werewolf. There's a vampire. There's like a. Her father's, like, Frankenstein monster. Her mother is, like, Elvira. Like, everyone's. And then there's this one daughter, and everyone's like, girl, you're weird. And she's like, this is wild because y'. All. But she is now convinced that she's weird and that they're normal. I'm the daughter.

[Monet X Change]

The fact that you genuinely believe this is so. That is the crazy thing to me. The fact that you think that you were just this normal, everyday, young white woman. What's weird about me, Bob, you are a crazy fucking person. You walk into a room, first of all, you dress like a baggy sack. You have a big sack on, a big brim witch hat on. Oh, my.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is a takedown.

[Monet X Change]

Literally. Your dress alone is out of this world.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think in my group of friends, the way I dress is pretty standard within the context of the people I hang out with. It's not wild for me to show up in a big, flowy garment and

[Monet X Change]

a hat that is the size of the whole room. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't.

[Monet X Change]

And pointy and pointy wood shoes. That's normal.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. In my group of friends, yes, girl,

[Monet X Change]

it does feel normal. You are insane. I love you so much.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are.

[Monet X Change]

You are so kooky.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Malay gaslight exchange.

[Monet X Change]

I know. They involve the gaslight queen.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, should we do a poll which one of us is gaslighting? They're gonna say both of y'. All.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, we both gaslight. This is this. Honestly, we should really do a sibling gaslightery series. I mean, that's every episode.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's even a podcast. I've been lying. We've been making this show up the whole time. We have never released a single episode.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. I watched a new Matrix, and I know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it good?

[Monet X Change]

It's fine. First of all, I didn't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob keeps being like, we should watch it. But no one has given it a glowing review. And I'm like, you need to watch. Don't look up.

[Monet X Change]

Everyone is saying that I need to watch it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob didn't like it.

[Monet X Change]

I didn't. I've heard about. I haven't seen it yet. But I know that we're not Pull it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh my gosh.

[Monet X Change]

I've been working out girl. I can still be trying to wrestle, but you can't. Okay, hold on. We'll do at the end. And I know that we're not in the Matrix, but do you ever think that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No.

[Monet X Change]

That we're assimilate that we're in a simulation?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Never have I ever thought that.

[Monet X Change]

Not even a little bit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Literally Never. Not once have I ever thought that. You know what I do think sometimes some of the myself none of this matters. That I think a lot. Meaning like what this whole Earth is gonna like. You can't really leave a legacy. You can leave a legacy for people to come after you. But honestly this whole planet is one day just gonna. The whole thing's not gonna exist.

[Monet X Change]

Oh yeah. And I'm like human but. But wheel so it's probably will be in ships in space like Wall E.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think so.

[Monet X Change]

You don't think that we'll ever get. We'll ever be that smart?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think Earth. Mankind on Earth is doomed. We can't. Not in our lifetime. And no one will. No one listen to this when it's recorded's lifetime. But I do think that there will come a point where Earth will. I mean by the way that's just science. That's not me.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it will. Planets explode and none of this will matter. But I think.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think it matters for now. But in the long run none of it matter.

[Monet X Change]

I think science and technology will advance enough that the human species will probably exist on in another way. Like in like a big ass fucking space whatever or to another planet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I think to myself like I. I can't go too far down that rabbit hole because I do kind of fear that deep down I could be a bad person. Because none of this matters like you.

[Monet X Change]

Because the more you think about it, it'll make you become a bad person. Like you just be doing bad shit because you're like none of it matters.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

None of it matters.

[Monet X Change]

Like bad like what? Like murder?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know. I don't go down the deep dark hole. But I feel like being nice if you go down that rabbit hole. Doesn't make sense. And it doesn't.

[Monet X Change]

You know what it is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There have been times in my life, especially working in bars, when, like, a drunk person, like, a really drunk person will come up to me and they're wasted. And I'm like, I'm not gonna waste kindness on you. I'm just not gonna, like, I'm not gonna be like, pardon me, I'm not gonna. I'm just gonna just like. If you. If a drunk person's like, I. I'm gonna. I'll just walk away. And I don't care if it hurts their feelings because they just will not remember it. And I'm like, I'm not going to engage with you. I'm not going to let you down easy. I'm just gonna be like, let me down, let me down. That's water, another bridge.

[Monet X Change]

It's hard.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If you're gonna know, let me down gently.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I. But I'm not like. I would never, like, like, be like, hurt the. But I think if the person was coherent, I would probably find a way to, like, disengage with them in a polite way. But if they're wasted, I will not waste my time trying to make my disengagement nice. I'll just be like. I would literally just. Just. I would just turn around and walk away.

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That.

[Monet X Change]

That way. You went through so many things. First, you were like, if I went out of deep down ho, I wouldn't care. I would murder people.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You, like, you said, murder. And I said, I don't know about that. This is what I mean by gaslighting. This is what I mean. Monetary after murder. I said, I don't. I don't want to say. You said you'd murder. I did not mean.

[Monet X Change]

Obviously, we know he did. I'm just saying, Bob, this is how we. Again, again, going back to my point.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How do you get. How do you light a gas?

[Monet X Change]

This is how we can get into podcast. Bob, I will say something. I will say. I will say that I like apples. You're like, oh, my. You like everything. You like apples, you like cars, you like growing trees. I never said those things, but that's how we engage on the podcast anyway. And now you're like, if I saw someone drunk, I wouldn't talk to them. It just seemed like you just got really.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It got left to be when, like, here's example. I don't talk to babies. I don't. I don't. I don't goo goo gaga babies. There was a thing when my niece was born, and my brother was like, you don't call and Talk to my daughter. And I was like, she's two. I'm not calling to talk to a two year old. I'm not going to have a phone conversation with a two year old. I don't want to. Who is that for? Maybe it's like for development or something, I don't know. But I just don't want to talk to a 2 year old that's not like my own child or I will talk to her and like, I don't want to. Also, Nevaeh, if you're listening, if you're there in person, I will talk to this baby.

[Monet X Change]

But you talk to them like they're an adult. You're like, hi. Hi, Nevaeh. That is a very nice dress you're wearing today.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I talk to children like adults.

[Monet X Change]

I do, but they say that you're supposed to do that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I don't goo goo gaga babies. And I will not call a baby on the phone. You've seen people do this.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, for sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's. That's weird to me. Why the fuck are you talking to a baby? The baby doesn't understand you. If you're talking to a baby in person, that is like helping them developing their brain. Right, But I'm not going to call on the phone and talk to a child.

[Monet X Change]

But in theory, theoretically, babies, you're the. You're you. You have your most. Like for example, when you're born, you have all the brain cells you're gonna have and then you lose them over. That's what. That is true. That is not true. Jake. It up.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Brain cells regenerate.

[Monet X Change]

Do they?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, they do.

[Monet X Change]

Let's confirm that. I mean, and the movie baby geniuses, they don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, that's not a science fiction. That's not. That's not a documentary again. I know they do brain cells. That, that is. That, that is a. A like one of those fake things that's been spread around and folks like you. Brain cells can't regenerate. Not true.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, I didn't say to generate. I just said it's you. Oh, yeah, I guess essentially that's what I'm saying.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But go ahead with, with your fake news.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, I mean, listen, I said it before, you should not take antibiotics. Anyway, So the dentist and Jacob has a plan.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob is going to have them edit down our argument.

[Monet X Change]

Jacob doesn't do that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Guess why we're going so long now? Because Jacob's gonna edit down the argument in the beginning and make it only the. I know how Jacob's A little, Little, little brain work. I mean, am I right?

[Monet X Change]

No, I'm. I'm gonna just say that we stopped arguing at 35 minutes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, that's really clever, baby.

[Monet X Change]

No, not you accused. Not you accusing Jake of being a sneaky little boyfriend. Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I did not say that. But anyway, I think that if I had a baby or if I was with a baby, I would engage with the baby.

[Monet X Change]

Have you changed your mind on that since the.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What, having a child? Yeah, a little bit. I've softened on it. There was a point where I was like, I don't want to have a kid. I do still think that creating a child from scratch is a little bit selfish. I also don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with being selfish. A little bit work. Do you think it's wrong? Do you think being selfish is wrong?

[Monet X Change]

I mean, there's nuance to it. I mean, obviously a selfless acts you can do. There is. But if there are good selfless. If you can be selfless. I think the opposite. You. You should be able to be selfish. Selfish in certain. Certain situations. So I guess, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. I think despite what was said at the beginning of this podcast, I strongly believe in prioritizing your own, you know, prioritizing yourself always. I mean, one time me and. I think me and Ezra were having a conversation. I was like, I will. I. You will. I will always consider you, but I will always prioritize myself. Like, you will always be considered, but you will never take precedent over me.

[Monet X Change]

You want to have the conversation with Jacob now too?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think Jacob and I understand that about each other. I think Jacob and I are very good at looking out for ourselves. And we. We probably have had some iteration of that conversation at some point over the course of our tenure as partners. Does that sound accurate to you?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. After we got mugged and left you behind.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That. That absolutely did not happen. That has literally.

[Monet X Change]

Oh. So do you want to accuse Jacob of gaslighting, or do you only want to do it to the black people that work in civil libraries? Is it only to the black people that you want to accuse of gaslighting, but the white people can pass work? Got it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like I just said, that is what Jacob just said is categorically false. Jacob and I had one run in with the cops one time. We were in.

[Monet X Change]

Did he call them on you?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Okay.

[Monet X Change]

We were.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We were headed back from a gig or we went to a club together, but we were both dressed up. You know how nightlife dressed up, like wearing costumes and stuff. I had to pee. So I don't know why we were walking because we. We took a car. But for some reason we. I think I had to pee so bad. I was like, you have to stop now. And we were like maybe like five minutes from the house. And I was like, I literally cannot make it. You literally have to pull the car over now. So he pulled over and I. And I am dressed in like, like just all black. It looks. It looks very creepy. It was.

[Monet X Change]

It was the straight character. The straight witch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no, no. This. This was a costume. We were like. We were like club kidding.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It.

[Monet X Change]

This was not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is not how I normally do. We were like. We were like club kids. It's like we were wearing makeup and stuff. I am running and I mean running down the streets of Berkeley in all black. All black. It's long, flowy. I think I have a mask on. I'm wearing gloves. I mean it was this. Oh, there's a cape. It's all black. Head to. I think I'm wearing a mask too.

[Monet X Change]

Right? It sounds like this on the get over clothes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What?

[Monet X Change]

It sounds like you're normal every day.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Shut the. Shut the fuck up. Shut up. And I was wearing pointy toed shoes.

[Monet X Change]

I actually was wearing pointy toed shoes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I am running because I'm trying to find out. So I find a parking lot and then I find. But Jacob's not running. Because Jacob, he's like. I don't think I've ever seen Jacob run.

[Monet X Change]

That was a nigga ramp. I seen you run.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We raced each other and we tied.

[Monet X Change]

There's a venue over there.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

My leg must have been hurting that day. So I'm running to go to pee and I find a corner of a parking lot. I piss in the corner and this cop is like. This cop's like, what are you doing? And I was like, I'm walking home.

[Monet X Change]

Like, as you're peeing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I finished peeing. And he pulls up to me and Jacob and he's like, what are you two doing? And I was like, we're walking home. He's like, where do you live? And I was like, I'm not telling you that. And he was like, why are you running? I was like, because sometimes I run. He's like, why are you dressed like that? And I was like, just because we're wearing costumes. Can I help you with anything else?

[Monet X Change]

And he's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's just kind of weird. You're like, dress funny. You're running. Yeah, I'm dressed funny and I'm Running, you got me.

[Monet X Change]

And it rapid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He left us alone. That's roughly what happened, right?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but niggas die for shit like that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know, but that's why I wasn't. I wasn't gonna tell him where I live.

[Monet X Change]

I know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, I'm drunk.

[Monet X Change]

That's the thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When cops. You're right. I'm in a costume and I'm running.

[Monet X Change]

And when cops do that shit, they try to intimidate you. Like, bitch, I don't have to tell you where I live. Yeah, I'm wearing a costume and running. Bitch, I am an American citizen. I can do that. Bitch, I can wear. Do this every night if I want to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, but I was. I also was not gonna. I wasn't gonna justify. I wasn't like, I'm a club kid and I'm a drag queen, and I dress up, and we were at a party and.

[Monet X Change]

Telling me your whole life story.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. I was like, I'm dressed funny and I'm running. We're all on the same page. I wasn't running from anything. I was just running.

[Monet X Change]

And you're wearing your. Your uniform unicar.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like. And I was like, is it. Is it okay to run? He goes, it's okay to run. I was like, all right, well, then we're good, my nigga.

[Monet X Change]

Was he black?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think he was black. Yeah. I mean, I don't. I don't have a direct recollection of what he looks like, so I really wish I could remember what people look like in the moment. When I first moved into my apartment over. Over at me and Ezra's place, this guy who, like, was on the HOA board was like, what unit do you live in? And I always want to remember what he looks like, but I can't remember because I want to, mean, mug him in the elevator. I want to make him. I want to inspire him to feel uncomfortable next time I see him, but I can't remember. But then I don't want to look at every single white guy with a dog because I'm like, I don't want to make all these motherfuckers.

[Monet X Change]

Why not?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, but I do want that guy who, Like, I felt uncomfortable talking to him, and I would like to return the favor every. For the entirety of our lease in that place. I don't want him to ever have a moment of release around me. That's what. That's my wish. That's my resolution. But I can't remember what his dog was. It Was very dark and not, where

[Monet X Change]

do you live, nigga?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Where the fuck do you live? And the woman with me told him where I lived.

[Monet X Change]

Did she?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I told you that there's a stripper who.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She was like, he's in this unit. And I was like, I just met you, Michelle.

[Monet X Change]

Shut your ass up.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Isis. Shout out to isis.

[Monet X Change]

If you're listening, it should be the one ISIS moved. She probably died.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

ISIS now lives in a van.

[Monet X Change]

Does she?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

A lot of people want to. Do you like this? Tiny homes and like that. I'm like that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and Monet's partner are going to live in a tiny home together.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Andy wants a tiny home.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He's really funny. I think he and I would actually do really well on like a cross country trip if we just did like a month. If Andy and I took a month off. And he already drives a. A school bus.

[Monet X Change]

He does. He drives a Ray van. Girl.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He drives a school bus. I went to monetize.

[Monet X Change]

He does not drive a school bus. You are so silly.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He drives a bus.

[Monet X Change]

It is literally a van.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It is a. It's like a 25 passenger van.

[Monet X Change]

That's a bus. It was a 15 passenger van.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. And he drives a.

[Monet X Change]

Well, he was. It was his work car. He had.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Andy drives a commercial grade vehicle. Is that fair to say?

[Monet X Change]

You don't need a CDL to drive that car. Not a commercial vehicle.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know. I was gagged. I was gagged when it pulled up.

[Monet X Change]

It was his work van. He had it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I was like, what is it? Anyway, he. I think it'd be really, you know, I really wanted to, like, I wanted to. I had this, this idea back when I was on Drag Race to drive from L from New York to la, I remember, and document it and then like get there. If I would have fucking. I mean, I did. I won Drag Race. I didn't know I was going to win the time I thought I to was going, gonna win. I was pretty convinced I was gonna win. But I like what a great end to that documentary.

[Monet X Change]

Might be great.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Should have done it.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, you basically do that now we're here, you're just flying.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

True. But I got these other bitches living.

[Monet X Change]

Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I like them a lot. Wow.

[Monet X Change]

Tag Shangela and Eureka in this video. And timestamp this. Wow. Tag them and timestamp this.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Whoa.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I really enjoy my co stars.

[Monet X Change]

Say it one more time with more feeling. All right. Is this the one about conflict resolution, part two?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no, no. This is this is the one about hearing out your friends and respecting their boundaries.

[Monet X Change]

We don't have no boundaries. What is my friend. I don't have no bad friends.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is not. I want to be clear. That is. That is not true.

[Monet X Change]

We do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is not where we stand.

[Monet X Change]

Where. What are boundaries?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There are a lot that you asked me not to do that I don't do.

[Monet X Change]

Like, what do you Name one?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There is one video that you don't want me showing people.

[Monet X Change]

What video? The people hating on the COVID Nope.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The one. The one video.

[Monet X Change]

Which one?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you want me to say what it is?

[Monet X Change]

No. Well, type it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's the vid there. It's a performance you did.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I've never. I have never shown anyone that performance.

[Monet X Change]

You brought it up at your house one time. No, absolutely.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That was when you told me. That was the time you told me

[Monet X Change]

not to bring it up from. Since 945, Amsterdam, when you had the big. When you had the big projector at Fort Washington. You absolutely brought it. I was like, bob. No, you absolutely did. Wait, really? You didn't play it. You're like, okay, okay, I won't do it. You absolutely did that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Was it just me and you?

[Monet X Change]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who was there?

[Monet X Change]

I think probably Patty Mateo. It was like the friend circle. So thank you for respecting my boundaries.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't play it.

[Monet X Change]

People can YouTube. They now watch YouTube and find out none of them.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I haven't even shown Jake in the video.

[Monet X Change]

Well, listen, listen. I can't speak to. I don't know what you and Jacob do in your private time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, you can. You know that. I'm a trustworthy person. You are so outdated. Do you want to have the privilege of saying goodbye to our listeners and viewers?

[Monet X Change]

No. It is a privilege and an honor. I love you guys and thank you for tuning in. We'll see you next time at Sibling rivalry.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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