Advicery - Naked Yoga

Summary

Sibling Rivalry – Advicery: Naked Yoga (July 27, 2026)

Hosts: Bob the Drag Queen & Monét X Change
Episode Summary by Sibling Rivalry

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Overview

In this episode, the hilariously candid duo Bob the Drag Queen and Monét X Change dive into an extra-messy “Advicery” session. As always, they blend quick wit, personal anecdotes, and a bit of chaos to tackle listeners’ burning life questions and internet controversies. Topics range from the etiquette of bridesmaid dresses to decoding San Francisco’s nude yoga scene, with stops at celebrity guessing games and fat acceptance discourse. The conversation is as unfiltered as ever, with Bob and Monét volleying shade, insight, and laughter throughout.

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Key Segments & Discussion Highlights

1. Classic Sibling Bickering & Celebrity Guessing Game

(00:33–17:24)

• The hosts open with trademark banter about shoes, tattoos, gifting etiquette ("You have bad will!" - Bob, 01:33), and Monét’s proposed tattoo featuring a pinup trans woman.
• Bob and Monét play "People Plays Them Days"—a guessing game where one hosts thinks of a celebrity and the other has to guess, only allowed to ask yes/no questions, leading to much confusion and code-switching (“You were obfuscating. You made that weird on purpose.” – Bob, 17:32).
• Notable guessing moments:
  • Chuckling over confusion between “silver screen” and “big screen.”
  • Monét stumps Bob with Lena Dunham: “If Lena Dunham walked in this room right now, I would not know who she was.” – Bob, 16:44
  • Multiple callouts about playing “dirty” and making rules mid-game.
  • Discussion around whether Lena Dunham is primarily a comedic actor and what constitutes being funny.

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2. The ‘Toxic Ex’ Friend Dilemma

(22:01–27:41)

• Listener asks if it’s a red flag that their new crush is best friends with their own best friend’s universally reviled, “toxic” ex.
• Both hosts scrutinize the term “toxic”:
  • “Toxic is such a vitriolic word. If you say someone is toxic, you’re basically saying they poison the things around them.” – Bob, 23:37
  • Monét stresses observing if the boyfriend’s behavior mimics the toxic friend’s, then re-evaluate: “If your friend’s behavior starts to change and shift into shady-dom, then it’s a red flag.” (27:41)
• Bob’s verdict: “It’s a dark pink flag, but not a red flag. I would tread lightly.” (26:29)

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3. Bridesmaid Dress Body Anxiety

(28:07–36:19)

• Plus-sized listener feels uncomfortable with a bridesmaid dress chosen by her friend: should she conform or bow out?
• Monét advocates for giving bridesmaids more choice: “Why does every dress have to be the same? Just let people do different silhouettes.” (29:15)
• Bob offers a pragmatic view considering the bride’s perspective: “This day is not about you, it’s about me.” But adds if someone feels that uncomfortable, they should have the option to step down with no hard feelings. (30:01–31:13)
• They consult a guest (Amber) who says she considered her bridesmaids’ comfort in her wedding.
• A thoughtful debate about balancing group aesthetics with individual comfort.

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4. The “Normal Gay” Bit & Robbie Hoffman’s Controversy

(36:19–38:20)

• Quick detour to discuss comedian Robbie Hoffman, who leans into jokes about being a “normal gay.”
• Both discuss the discomfort with “heteronormative” humor and the blurred line of whether it’s subversive or exclusionary.
  • “I think she’s trying to do a bit. That’s not funny.” – Monét, 38:15

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5. Decoding San Francisco’s Nude Gay Yoga

(38:20–43:45)

• Listener asks if an invite to nude gay yoga is a coded hookup invitation or just “a San Francisco thing.”
• Monét: “I have friends who do gay nude yoga and it is NOT sexual.” (39:07)
• Bob posits, “If everyone keeps telling you it’s not sexual, I think you’re just horny.” (39:11)
• Extended, comical riff on nudism, yoga, and growing up barefoot in the southern heat.
• The hosts affirm: nude gay yoga is mostly about body positivity, community, and not inherently about sex.

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6. Underwear, Sleep, and Gendered Bodies

(43:09–45:41)

• Tangent: Sleeping nude vs. with underwear and how genitalia behaves in various sleep scenarios (“I’m a grower, not a shower.” – Bob, 43:44).
• Bob and Monét share their histories and preferences regarding boxers, briefs, and commando life—a running bit throughout Sibling Rivalry.

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7. The Ariana Grande Ticket Dilemma

(45:56–50:07)

• Listener asks whether it’s okay to cut out her ex from an Ariana Grande concert ticket block after they broke up (the ticket was paid for by the ex, but not transferred yet).
• Bob’s philosophy: “Either you gotta go and be uncomfortable for the evening or you gotta bite the bullet and not go.” (46:55)
• Monét would still go and have a great time, regardless of ex drama: “I would have the best time I can and damned if he’s uncomfortable. I’m gonna be high on shrooms.” (48:04)

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8. The Language of "Fat" & Descriptors

(51:42–56:23)

• Deep dive into fat acceptance, the reclaiming of “fat” as a neutral descriptor, and sensitivity around alternate terms like “heavyset,” “plus size,” etc.
• Bob credits Aidy Bryant and the show Shrill for normalizing the word “fat.”
  • “It is okay to describe something as… or a person as fat without it being like a pejorative.” – Bob, 52:41
• Monét reflects: “But it’s not your word to…there are people who are fat that are not comfortable with fat being used as a descriptor.”
• Parallel drawn to language around Jewish identity and reclaiming/rejecting terms.
• Mutual agreement: Listen to “Tell Me I’m Fat” from This American Life for deeper understanding.

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9. The "Little People" Naming Conversation

(56:23–58:24)

• The hosts segue into respectful language for little people, highlighting accepted (and offensive) terms and parsing cultural references from TV and literature.
• Reference to the show “Little Women” and terminology evolution.

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10. End of Episode: Plans & Schedules

(58:24–end)

• Episode closes with Bob and Monét’s plans, Bob teasing Monét about working schedules, and a signature sign-off of Sibling Rivalry energy.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You have bad will.” – Bob (01:33)
• “I’m a grower, not a shower.” – Bob (43:44)
• “Toxic is such a vitriolic word. If you say someone is toxic, you’re basically saying they poison things around them.” – Bob (23:37)
• “It’s a dark pink flag, but not a red flag.” – Bob (26:29)
• “Jesus hung out with the lepers and the hookers and the… You’re better than Jesus, huh?” – Bob (26:41)
• “I would have the best time I can and damned if he’s uncomfortable. I’m gonna take my mushrooms.” – Monét (48:04)
• “Is that the Jesus or Tupac? One of them said it.” – Monét (50:58)

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Summary Table of Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Start | End | |--------------------------------------------|------------|------------| | Bickering & Celebrity Game | 00:33 | 17:24 | | Toxic Ex Dilemma | 22:01 | 27:41 | | Bridesmaid Dress Body Anxiety | 28:07 | 36:19 | | Robbie Hoffman & “Normal Gay” Bit | 36:19 | 38:20 | | Nude Gay Yoga | 38:20 | 43:45 | | Underwear & Sleep Habits | 43:09 | 45:41 | | Ariana Grande Ticket Quandary | 45:56 | 50:07 | | Language on Fat/Plus Size | 51:42 | 56:23 | | Little People Naming | 56:23 | 58:24 | | Final Wrap | 58:24 | end |

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Tone & Energy

• Unapologetically direct. Bob and Monét are unflinchingly honest—whether disagreeing, doling out “real talk” advice, or unpacking delicate cultural subjects.
• Culturally aware, hilariously irreverent. They address themes of queer life, gender, bodies, and relationships with layered perspective, always tempered by sharp humor.

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For Listeners

Whether you’re struggling with a “dark pink flag” relationship, reconsidering the language you use around identity and bodies, or just need a laugh listening to two drag icons bicker over Lena Dunham’s cultural impact, this Advicery episode delivers classic Sibling Rivalry: smart, funny, and subversively wise.

Transcript

[A]

My name is bob the drag queen

[B]

and I'm monet x change.

[A]

And this is simply rivalry. On today's episode, I find out who Lena Dunham is.

[B]

We help a fan figure out a wedding disaster.

[A]

And we find out what made Monet say this.

[B]

Is that the Jesus or Tupac? One of them said it. And we find out what made Bob say this.

[A]

I'm a grower, not a shower. All right. I have a shoe. Tattoos.

[B]

Oh, tattoo. Okay, so I want to get a new tattoo, but I think you.

[A]

Oh, a shoe.

[B]

No, the shoes. Oh, the shoe is. Do you. Are you ever going to thank me for giving you all those shoes?

[A]

No.

[B]

You wear them often and you don't. You never thanked me.

[A]

I've given your answer already.

[B]

Why?

[A]

I don't want to.

[B]

So.

[A]

Because you're trying to demand it, you can take them back.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

If they come with this thing, which I didn't ask for.

[B]

Okay. You give me several things and then I have not asked for and you demand.

[A]

I have. Whenever I demanded a thank you quickly.

[B]

I'm not even going to get into it.

[A]

Because you can't think of one?

[B]

No.

[A]

Because every time your shoes come with this. Continue to take them. Every time you drop them off, you, you like, like, like. Do you go to Goodwill, drop something off in front and be like, thank me?

[B]

They literally say no, because you don't have to ask for it. They give you a thank you and you drop it off.

[A]

Well, I didn't ask you to drop them off. You drop them off.

[B]

I know the Goodwill doesn't ask me, then I drop them off and they thank me. So what's your point?

[A]

Goodwill.

[C]

You.

[B]

Yes, there's a little. Have you ever dropped anything off a Goodwill?

[A]

No.

[B]

Cuz you're not a good person.

[A]

No.

[B]

You have bad will.

[A]

Goodwill.

[B]

You have bad will.

[A]

Anyway, Goodwill, they think. What do they think? They say you drop it off in the box. How do they think there's a big

[B]

thing that says thank you for your donation to blah blah blah blah blah. There's a big post that says thank you.

[A]

Yeah, well, we don't have that.

[B]

Cuz we are all good people. We donate to Goodwill.

[A]

It's not a thrift store.

[B]

We donate to Goodwill.

[A]

You don't know what they do.

[D]

They donate to out of the closet thrift that supports.

[B]

Let me see it. Let me see.

[A]

We actually donate that. Where's the proof?

[B]

Believe you.

[A]

Where's your proof that you don't believe you? That's not. Where is. That is you. Where's your Prayer.

[B]

I asked you anyway. Tattoos. So I want to get this tattoo.

[A]

Make sure those shoes leave with you. These are not yours. Touch my. You did not drop off Balenciaga cross.

[B]

These are not Balenciaga, baby.

[A]

They are Balenciaga.

[B]

These are Balenciaga.

[A]

These are literally Balenciaga. Trust me anyway with your paint chipping ass.

[B]

Docs, I love these socks. These are cool. You know they don't make these anymore.

[A]

They made the patent. There's a reason. They're fucking falling apart.

[B]

They made the patent leather red ones like once and then they talk about your tattoo. I want to get this tattoo right here on my forearm and I want it to be like a tattoo of a trans woman with like her tits and her dick just out on my, on my, on my arm. Like, like, like a, like, like a, like an old school pinup style, but a trans woman.

[A]

Like that picture in your bathroom.

[B]

Oh, that.

[A]

The one above the toilet.

[B]

Things you lost in the fire.

[A]

Oh, it's gone.

[B]

It's not mine. Gang.

[D]

Gang.

[A]

You trying to reclaim it in some way? You should ask a trans woman about that tattoo. No, but I mean, I think it's

[B]

okay to get it. But what I think when I'm like, when I do like movies and stuff like that, I can't just have a big.

[A]

You can have any tattoos in a

[B]

movie, but I've never had a problem.

[A]

You supposed to get them covered. Cuz you, you have to get a letter from every.

[B]

I have one.

[A]

Not only that, this is one.

[B]

This one guy.

[A]

And what about this club, the Space Clef?

[B]

This is a guy from.

[A]

You would need that cover.

[B]

You don't know.

[A]

But. But legally you would need to have it cleared.

[B]

I have all these cleared though by Maya Bailey because they're all the same person.

[A]

Oh yeah. Well, that one. That one over there.

[B]

Yeah. That's not.

[A]

How about the fingers?

[B]

That's Maya too.

[D]

Gang.

[B]

Gang. Yeah.

[A]

How about the freckles?

[B]

I was born with these babies.

[A]

You have to get them cleared.

[B]

I was born with.

[A]

We have footages. So you were in makeup the first six years of the podcast. You were covering over the first six years of the podcast. Yes, I was.

[B]

I was insecure.

[A]

Okay. I have a celebrity in my head.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

No, I have a. I have. We're playing People Plays them Days.

[B]

You already gave yourself up.

[D]

Me. So I know.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I don't have. I don't have my phone.

[B]

Well, you need to clear it because we don't trust you.

[A]

Well, I don't trust you, so now what? I have it in my head.

[B]

Is this a woman? Oh, is. Is. Is. Is it a celebrity?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Is it a woman?

[A]

No.

[B]

Is it a man?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Are they an actor?

[A]

Technically, yes.

[B]

Bob, the technical answer is.

[A]

It is a technical.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

You can ask clarifying questions. You're allowed to.

[B]

Are they dead or alive? Are they dead?

[A]

That's not.

[B]

Yes, dead.

[A]

If I would have answered that the definitive way, I would have confused you. So I'm actually helping you by saying.

[B]

I did not say anything. I just literally just.

[A]

You did a whole thing.

[B]

Were they on the silver screen?

[A]

They?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

He.

[B]

You could use they. Them pronouns for this person used he.

[A]

Them pronouns.

[B]

How do you know?

[A]

Because they're dead. It was clear they used them. Yes, he was on the silver screen.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Silver screen. Were they always on the big screen, like television? No. Movies.

[A]

The movies are the silver screen.

[B]

No. TV shows are silver screen. Movies are.

[A]

No, that's.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah. So you're wrong. So. So you got any other confusing questions?

[B]

What are TV shows called?

[A]

TV bitch. I don't know. The movies are the silver screen. The Great White Way. The silver screen.

[D]

Early film projectors were really weak, so they used to coat the screens that you would project movies onto with silver. So it was called the silver screen.

[A]

You said that so. So confidently.

[B]

I did. I thought you got me. I made a mistake.

[D]

I got you.

[B]

Ooh, it tastes delicious, too. I'm sure it does. Were they in the wizard of Oz?

[A]

No, he was not.

[B]

Was he in Westerns?

[A]

No, not to my knowledge. I'm pretty sure he was not. Right, Jacob.

[B]

He was.

[A]

There's no way he was right. Yeah.

[B]

Were they in the 90s?

[A]

Was he in the 90s?

[B]

Did. Did. Okay. Did they die in the 90s?

[D]

No.

[B]

Did they die in the 2000s?

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. Were they in their 60s?

[A]

He might have been. He might have been in the 60s. He might have been in the 70s.

[B]

Were they blocked?

[A]

He was not black. Still not.

[B]

Were they white?

[A]

He was white.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[D]

60s.

[A]

You still don't know what he does for a living.

[B]

These are my questions.

[A]

Okay, go ahead.

[B]

Was acting their only job?

[A]

No.

[B]

Were they a singer?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Okay. A singer who was in the 60s?

[A]

Maybe in his 60s? He might have been. He might have been in 70s still. I don't know, but I'm.

[B]

Oh, so old. So. So when he got older.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Okay. 70s singer, white, acted sometimes 69.

[A]

69 years old.

[B]

69 years old. Okay. 69 years old.

[A]

Did you get it before them? You have to beat them to it, by the way.

[B]

Okay, now you're adding fucking.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Making it fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Were they. Did they have children?

[A]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure they had kids.

[B]

Yeah, they're children. Okay. Children. Singer died in the 70s.

[A]

You don't want to know the genre of music, he's saying.

[B]

Oh, yeah. What genre music were they?

[D]

Pop? Yes.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Do they have multiple genres?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Were they rock?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Rock, pop, white, 70s, Ozzy Osbourne. This is hard. Were they.

[A]

Does anyone over there know who it is yet?

[B]

Seventies died.

[A]

Pop, rock.

[B]

Acted sometimes, but primarily a singer.

[A]

You're allowed to give up anytime you want.

[B]

I give up.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

You say every time I want.

[A]

Damn, that was crazy.

[B]

That was the only time I want. Is David Bowie.

[A]

Is David Bowie here?

[B]

I don't know what that reference is.

[A]

The Nina Simone reference. Oh, is David Bowie here?

[B]

Was she mad at him?

[A]

No, she just wanted to know if he was in the room. She was mad at the audience.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

She was high, though.

[B]

I mean, what.

[C]

What.

[B]

What was her drug of choice? Do we know?

[A]

No clue.

[B]

Nina Simone.

[A]

All right.

[B]

I know Billie Holiday was a heroin girly type.

[A]

Yours in for Jacob.

[D]

We're texting.

[A]

Oh, I'm so excited about it. I feel like. I feel like I'm gonna get this in less than 2.

[B]

I feel like you're not.

[D]

That says Triflon and lithium.

[B]

Oh, wow. Okay, Jacob, that sounds.

[D]

Wow.

[A]

You drinking coffee?

[B]

No. Tea.

[D]

Tea.

[A]

What kind of tea?

[B]

This is a throat coat.

[A]

Oh. I was trying to get a little throat together. You got a show this weekend?

[B]

No, I'm just trying to be. Just trying to be more mindful of my. How I use my instrument.

[A]

Do you put honey in there?

[B]

There is honey. Manuka.

[A]

Honey lemon in there?

[B]

No lemon?

[A]

No lemon?

[B]

No.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

There's some slippery elm.

[A]

It's throat coat. Your thing is throw coat.

[B]

Anyway.

[A]

Are you a person?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Are you a woman?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Are you alive?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

This is gonna be so easy. Are you an actor?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Are you primarily an actor?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You have an awesome.

[B]

Kinda.

[A]

Do you have an album?

[B]

No.

[A]

Do you have an Oscar?

[B]

No.

[A]

Do you have an Emmy?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Jacob, are you a comedic actor?

[D]

No. No Emmy?

[A]

No Emmy. Are you a comedic actor?

[B]

You could say 1. 1. 1 could say.

[A]

One could say. Okay. Are you.

[B]

That's my. That's.

[A]

Are you white?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You are white. Are you over 50?

[B]

No.

[A]

Are you over. Are you in your 30s, Jacob?

[B]

No. I think so.

[A]

You're in your 40s?

[B]

I think they're.

[A]

You're in your 40s'?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. Have you been in a major Motion picture. Like a major. You've not.

[B]

No.

[A]

Have you been on Broadway? No, never been on Broadway. So you're. You're a television actor? Yes.

[B]

Yes. Yes.

[A]

Have you been in a. Like a major TV show?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You've been in a major TV show?

[B]

Yeah, for.

[A]

If you're a TV actor. Okay. Were you on Friends?

[B]

No.

[A]

You were not on Friends?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay. You are a white woman in your 40s. You're. You've been on TV show. You're primarily an actor. You do not have an album. You don't have Emmy. You do not have.

[D]

You got no shade. But is anyone on Friends right now in their 40s?

[B]

Right.

[D]

I don't.

[A]

I don't know how they are, to be honest. But. What? Everything I said was true. Correct.

[B]

Wait, what did you say about me?

[A]

You're a woman. You're white, you're in your 40s. You're primarily an actor. You've never been in a movie.

[B]

You've gotten everything wrong. I am black. I am a non binary person. I'm a drag queen. I'm a singer.

[A]

Monet. Answer the fucking question, bitch.

[C]

You got those.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

This is Everything you said was correct?

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. Your TV show, is it on TV right now?

[B]

No.

[A]

Was it on TV in the 90s? No, it was in the early 2000s.

[B]

2000s.

[A]

Were you on Disney?

[B]

No.

[A]

Were you on, like, network television? Like abc, NBC, Fox? Were you on mtv?

[B]

No.

[A]

Were you on Comedy Central?

[B]

No.

[A]

Were you on.

[B]

You can give up anytime, by the way?

[A]

No. I don't know. I'm not. I'm not like you.

[D]

Were you.

[A]

You're not a commute. Were you on Netflix?

[B]

No.

[A]

Amazon.

[B]

Were they Netflix? I don't think they were on Netflix.

[D]

They do have a show on Netflix.

[B]

Oh, they Now.

[A]

She has a show on Netflix?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Now? Yes.

[A]

So you are on TV now.

[D]

I mean, but is that. Is Netflix tv? Yes. Year. No.

[A]

Netflix is tv, but the show did

[D]

not come out this year. So is it.

[A]

Are they currently making episodes?

[D]

I don't think so. I think. No.

[B]

No, no, no, no.

[A]

Y' all know.

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

But it was a recent show.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Are you Max Alter?

[B]

No. She probably.

[A]

She's in her 30s.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Megan's probably late. I would say Mega's probably 29.

[A]

I would say she's definitely a comedic actor.

[B]

Yeah. For sure.

[A]

And, you know, I. For a fact, I know who this woman is.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Easy.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. Is she. Is she. Are you blonde? No. Or you do have black hair?

[B]

Brown.

[A]

You're Brunette. That's not a yes or no. Oh, please don't cheat. You're a brunette. And are you like, you're like a serious actor?

[B]

No.

[A]

So you're not really comedic and you're not a serious actor?

[B]

Kind of like in the middle.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Are you. Are you a comedian? Like, do you do stand up comedy?

[B]

No.

[A]

You don't do stand up comedy?

[B]

No.

[A]

But you're kind of funny.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Huh. Are you married?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Oh, really?

[A]

You got kids?

[D]

No.

[B]

No. No kids.

[A]

No kids. Are you that lady who's in Stop that Train?

[D]

Rachel Bloom? No.

[B]

No.

[A]

Oh. Oh.

[D]

This is.

[A]

This is a wild ride, girl. Well, you gave up, so let's clear that up. All right. You are. Are you fashionable?

[B]

No.

[A]

When you're watching this, are you gonna be mad that you said that?

[B]

No, because I don't give a fuck.

[A]

The person you are doesn't give a fuck.

[B]

No.

[A]

Ooh. She don't give a fuck about nothing. Does she do, like, is she really funny in interviews?

[B]

I think so, yes.

[A]

Do people kind of agree with that?

[B]

I don't know. People I can pick for me, I think.

[A]

I think you can't imagine if people agree that this, like, for example, cheating.

[B]

You're acting.

[A]

No, I'm asking, are they for this I.

[C]

Cheating.

[A]

I'm asking no questions.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

No, you can't imagine that people think this person. No. You can't even fathom. Well, no. So to be clear, you're the only person. You know for a fact that you think this money is funny.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You're not playing. You're cheating. You don't know that anyone thinks. You think you're the only one in the world who thinks ladies are funny.

[B]

And I just said.

[A]

Yes. You actually. Yes. On a. I don't believe. I can't believe you think you're the only one in the world who thinks. I cannot wait to find who this lady is. And we need to have her on the podcast next fucking week.

[D]

Okay, I have a good hint, but this is not a yes or no question.

[A]

No, that's cheating. You can give it a no, that's cheating. Jake can do whatever he wants to do.

[B]

No, you ask yes, no questions.

[A]

See, this is how they collude. I said Jake can collude what he wants. No, you don't add rules. It's free. You don't get to add rules. You have to misreason the question.

[D]

When he's done, when he's given up, if he asks.

[A]

So she is a fashionless. Is she fat or is she fat?

[B]

She is. No.

[A]

And she's not well. Okay, what's happening?

[B]

I would not say fat.

[A]

What's. Is she skinny?

[B]

No, but she's, like, you know, in the middle thereof.

[A]

See, y' all are obfuscating now. Y' all are colluding. Jacob thinks she's fat. You think she's not fat?

[B]

Okay, yes. Fat. I mean, I wouldn't say, but sure, yes, I guess.

[A]

Text it to Taylor so Taylor can tell me if this woman's fat or not. Is she known for her beauty?

[B]

No.

[A]

So irritated with the way you asked this question. No one thinks she's funny but you. She has no talent. Her body is somewhere between fat, skinny, tall, short, and round.

[B]

Well, you look at. When she first came onto the scene, she was. And as she.

[A]

As.

[B]

She's got older. As you know, people get older, you gain a little weight. But, like, what. Maybe the thing that I'm thinking of that you would know her from. I don't think I would not call it clarify as fat in that show.

[A]

I think about her right now.

[B]

Right now? Yes.

[A]

Okay, I'm gonna ask three more questions, and if I don't have it, but then I'll give up. Is she. Was she. Is she an A list celebrity? I would say B.

[B]

Sorry. No. Jesus Christ.

[A]

So this bitch is not famous?

[B]

You're such an asshole. She is such an asshole.

[A]

She has no fashion sense.

[B]

Such an asshole.

[D]

She's.

[A]

No one thinks she's funny but you.

[B]

You're such a bitch.

[A]

I get two more questions. Do I have long hair?

[B]

No.

[A]

Do I have, like, a kitty cat?

[B]

No.

[A]

Do I have a bob?

[B]

No.

[A]

Dude.

[B]

All right, who is it?

[D]

Wait, I'm gonna get my head.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Okay. I have been on screen with her.

[A]

You have?

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Jacob Ritz has.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

In a TV show?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Well, I don't know your own boyfriend's lore?

[A]

No.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

Jacob's fit on a TV show with this woman. I have no clue who this is. I can't think of any TV shows you've been on.

[B]

Move that bus. Lena Dunham.

[A]

I don't know what Lena Dunham looks like. If Lena Dunham walked in this room right now, I would know she was what? And she is fat.

[D]

That's not true. You saw the Comeback and you love the Comeback. Lisa Kudrow. She points at the thing and she says, that's Leela Durham.

[A]

And you laughed because she messed up a name. But I'm telling you right now, if Lee. I didn't ever watch Girls, I'm telling her now. If Lena Dunham was in this room, I would not. I would not know who she was.

[D]

This is.

[A]

But this is clear. Like, I don't know Lena Dunham.

[B]

I mean, she's a.

[A]

And Lena Dunham is a comedic actor. People think Lena Dunham is a humorist. Like Lena Dunham's thing, that she's a humorist?

[B]

I think so. No, I mean, I think if you. Did you watch the show Girls?

[A]

No, but I know that Lena Dunham is a humorist.

[B]

I mean, okay, but you asked you if she was a comedian.

[A]

And then I asked what other people think she's funny. You go, no. And then I asked you if you were the only one who thinks she's funny. You said, yes.

[B]

Well, I was thinking about it, and you were like. I was like, then, no, because I don't. Because I think of Girls and the show she did. They're both like, they're not comedic shows. They're more serious. Like, they're not, you know, they're not like comedy shows.

[A]

I don't know if they're comedy shows, but I know for a fact that Lena Dunham is a humorist. And people think she's been. Taylor, you think Lena Dunham is considered a humorist?

[D]

Absolutely.

[A]

Jacob, would you say so?

[D]

Yes. Yeah.

[A]

You were obfuscating. You made that weird on purpose. I mean, you think you're the only person who thinks Lena Dunham is funny?

[B]

Well, you're asking for me because I was putting myself as Lena Dunham. I was like, yes.

[A]

And then I was like, what other people thinks of me. You're like, no, no, you play. You play dirty. You played a dirty, dirty game. But we're here to play your dirty games. We're here to answer some. Give some advice.

[B]

I know we're bringing back Watcher. We're bringing old school Watcher. Jacob wrote these out.

[A]

Now, I want to start. Before we give any advice to you, I want you all to know that this is not advice that you should be taking. Monet and I are not relationship counselors. We are not therapists. We are not physical therapists. We are not lawyers. We do. This is all for entertainment purposes. Do not take any advice that we give you. This is all for entertainment purposes. Solamente.

[B]

I'm watching the show Couples Therapy. It's so good.

[A]

I keep it so I see.

[B]

Great show.

[A]

I saw this couple that just went famous from couples therapy on TikTok because it was a. A is like a white lady and a black masculine person who has now changed their name. I don't know what their generating is right now, but they are like the Internet is saying that this person that this woman was dating was weaponizing autism.

[B]

Sorry, I've heard of this.

[A]

And that's from couples therapy, right?

[B]

I don't, I don't know, but I've heard this story. I haven't seen the clips or anything.

[A]

And then. Well, first of all, Tick Tock Loves drop you off in the middle of a series.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You will see the third Tick Tock and be like, now I gotta go back and find it. It's so annoying. I'm like, y' all not beat me. Like y' you have a TikTok famously has one of these smartest algorithms on the Internet. Yeah, give me the first one. Yeah, give me the first one. Anyway, that being said, so I saw this now I saw the women's version and she's like, my ex is.

[B]

Are they talking about this on the show? This is like now they're on the old social medias talking about their, their relationship.

[A]

Well, I haven't seen the other person. I haven't seen the black person. I only saw the white woman.

[B]

It's just her on her tik tok talking.

[A]

Yeah. Being like this is, this was going on with my ex. And I know you all are saying that. I was like, they're, they're basically saying that the, the black person was abusing

[B]

this white woman and weaponizing like and saying he is autistic when he wasn't.

[A]

By being like, by like when they're losing the argument, they'll just be like they would like turn on like extreme visual autism once they feel like they are not getting their way in a country.

[B]

Well, that's the thing. I've seen a lot of, of discourse on reels and tick tock about now. You know, people are self diagnosing later in life and medically getting diagnosis of, of having autism. And it's been a big topic conversation that people like you now people are Tylenol. It's the Tylenol.

[A]

It's the Tylenol.

[B]

And the bleach.

[A]

And the bleach.

[B]

And people are just saying that if you know, the reason why I'm reacting this way is because I'm autistic and you just have to like kind of deal with it.

[A]

I'm like, I have this theory. I have an uncle who is pretty autistic.

[B]

Do I know them?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

And he is really hard to deal with. He has a lot of diagnoses. Yeah, he has borderline personality disorder. He has what they used to call paranoid schizophrenia. And he has autism.

[B]

Was he diagnosed?

[D]

Yes.

[A]

And if, by the way, you. He's not someone who needs a diagnosis. Have you met him before? Did you think he.

[B]

But he has a lot of other stuff going on, so I didn't know what I may have been encountering.

[A]

You know, he's not the type to diagnosis of.

[D]

He's.

[A]

He's had to be like, none of this is real. I'm good. I don't need meds. He's one of those types.

[C]

Anyway.

[A]

That being said, he is a lot to deal with. And so I'm like, I'm not dealing with it. Yeah, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna.

[B]

No, it's fine if someone really has autism or a condition, but people are saying that they have so to excuse behavior.

[A]

But even if you. But I'm using my uncle's example. Even if you do have these things, I still might not want to deal with you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because, like, it's. You're too much. Because there are ways. I'm not a. Again, not. Not a psychologist or a therapist. But, like, there are tools for people to. But also, you still have your personality. Autistic does not make you an. You can be an. And you can have autism.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But being autistic does not make you an.

[B]

Right. Yeah.

[A]

Monk was kind of an.

[B]

Should we answer the questions?

[A]

Let's get into the questions.

[B]

Hi, Bob.

[A]

And doing couples therapy for people. You and me on this side, a couple on that side, and we just give therapy.

[B]

I don't think that will work out for anyone. I think we. You and I should go to therapy first.

[A]

We did go to therapy.

[B]

Yeah. And how did that work out?

[C]

Well.

[A]

But the fans loved her.

[B]

Hi. Bob Monet. I'm a gay man in my 20s and I just started hooking up with this cute guy. Things are going well and I like him. It's maybe moving towards something more. But I recently learned he is self described best friends with my best friends. Toxic ex, who all of our friends hate. Is this a red flag? Help. Okay, wait.

[A]

He is best friends. So wait, I'm dating Jacob. And Jacob is best friends with my best friend Taylor. But Taylor's ex is toxic, and Jacob is best friends with Taylor's toxic ex.

[B]

So Taylor's. So Jacob's friends with me.

[A]

You're. So you're.

[B]

I'm a toxic ex.

[A]

Yeah. So Jacob is best friends with you and you and I. But you. I'm assuming, since you two are. Since you're toxic you and Taylor don't talk anymore, I assume. I'm assuming.

[B]

But Taylor is a glutton for punishment. So maybe we're still. We're still talking.

[A]

Is this a red flag?

[C]

Help.

[A]

Okay, can I just say my hot take here?

[B]

What?

[A]

Everyone in your life's not toxic. Everyone. There's no way. Like when you on Tick Tock and the Internet, everyone's mom is a narcissist. Yeah, everyone. There's no way all of you have narcissists in your lives. I'm sorry, you can't all have narcissists in your lives.

[B]

So you're saying that this person isn't really toxic.

[A]

So I'm saying like everyone in the

[B]

thing is not toxic. He's just.

[A]

But how do we like. So we're taking this person's word for this person is toxic. How? We know they talk to.

[B]

But to everyone. Like someone is a villain in everyone's story. Like he doesn't make you talk.

[A]

You can be a villain without being taught.

[B]

I'm saying I'm using that to say like someone is something to everyone. So yes, Jacob thinks that I'm toxic. That doesn't mean that everyone else thinks I'm toxic.

[A]

Toxic is such a vitriolic word. And if you say someone is toxic, you're basically insanely. They're like you poison the things around you. Your presence alone makes things worse because of who you are, because you bring a toxicness and you make things toxicity. You make things toxic. You make things poisonous. So like I don't really know that many actual toxic people.

[B]

Do you? I know a few toxic people for sure.

[A]

Do I know them with you?

[B]

I think you know one or two for sure.

[A]

Okay, I'll answer your no questions.

[B]

We're not gonna get back but I think. Okay, well, let's just assume that this person really is toxic.

[D]

Ok. But he also said all their friends hate this person's ex. So there clearly is some what I

[B]

say to that at the end ex who all our friends hate.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Yeah. So.

[A]

Well, me and my friends don't like people who aren't toxic. We just don't like them.

[B]

But you, you and your friends what

[A]

don't like people who aren't toxic? We just don't like them.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Like I just don't like you because you're. But anyway, let's assume this person is toxic. Yeah, I do. Go ahead.

[B]

I was saying I'm. So things are going well. So the question is, is this a red flag that he is friends with Is it a red flag that Jacob is friends with me? And I'm like, I mean, I don't

[A]

think it's a red flag.

[B]

I think that I would tread lightly. And if I see that the toxic behaviors that I'm exhibiting are Jacob is picking on them or Jacob is okay with them, I would be like, that would make me question, like, why are you okay with these things that I'm doing? Like, well, looking at that friendship, I

[A]

have a friend who is friends with someone that I consider toxic. And this person is still my friend, but I do keep him at arm's length because I'm like, it's weird that you hang out with that person. Right?

[B]

Because the age old idiom, if you lay with dogs, you get fleas. I'm like, if you're hanging out with a toxic person who, you know, does toxic behavior, that to me, that is, that is a little strange. Like, why would you want to be friends with that person? Why would you want to hang out with that person? Why would you want to go see movies with that person? Why would you want to get dinner with that person?

[A]

Well, I guess, what are they benefiting from this person? I mean, like, I, I think that I have very close friends who do things that. Or work with people who I would not work with, but I don't actually think they're toxic. Like, I just wouldn't, I would not.

[B]

You've worked with.

[A]

That I would not work with. I'm like, same. I wouldn't, I wouldn't work that person. But I don't think it's a red flag that you would work with that person. I think it's a little bizarre. I'm like, I'm kind of like, I wouldn't do that, but pop off hat.

[B]

You know what I mean? Yeah, same. I think that I, I think for sure, I think there are people that you work with, other people, other friend. Other people that friends of mine work with. And I'm like, that really gags me. I'm confused as to why you continue to do that, but that's your business and, and I don't see it compromising your moral. So I'm okay with it. If you're working with someone that I, that I deem was toxic or I didn't like, and I saw your behavior shifting and you were acting in a strange way that seems out of character to you, then that would be concerning. But if you're still keeping your morals and your scruples, I mean, hang with the one you want. Who cares?

[A]

I would Say this is a dark pink flag, but not a red flag. You know what I mean? Because, like, I mean, Jesus hung out with the lepers and the hookers and the. You're better than Jesus, huh? You're better than Jesus.

[B]

I could hang out with those people. That's all we hang out with, lepers.

[A]

But I mean, I think. I also think there's something actually kind of remarkable about hanging out with people who you hold judgment for. Like, you are. Like, I judge your behavior, but I don't judge you. I think that is a plane that I'm not necessarily at. And I think there's actually something next level about being like, yeah, this person is, you know, a little bit mean, but I still like them. This person's a little bit messy, but I still like them.

[B]

There's a difference between mean and someone who is doing bad behavior. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, sure, we can hang out with people think you're mean. We're best friends.

[A]

People in your main.

[B]

Sir, I don't see true. Oh, my God, I can't get that

[A]

big ass fucking shoe leg. So I think it's a dark pink flag. I don't think it's a red flag, though.

[B]

Yeah, I would say keep. Keep your. Keep your eye. Keep your Kennedy davenport on a situation

[A]

and apologize to Kennedy right now.

[B]

I love Kennedy getting. I'm kidding. And I would just say monitor. If your friends. If. If your friend's behavior starts to change and shift into shady Dom, then you gotta. Then it's a red flag. But if they're still maintaining their peace and still being friends with them. Yes, yes. Annoying. But I. I don't think it's a. It's a deal breaker.

[A]

All right, let's go on to the next one. Hey, Bob Monet. My best W.

[B]

My best something is getting.

[A]

My best W is getting married. And chose a very specific bridesmaid dress for her bridal party. All the bridesmaids are naturally very thin, and the dress looks incredibly flattering on them. I am plus size, and this spec specific cut makes me feel completely exposed, insecure, uncomfortable. It's not just the dress. It's not just the dress is ugly. It simply wasn't designed for a body like mine. When I gently asked if I could wear a different style in the exact same fabric and color to feel more comfortable, she says she really wants the dresses to do this, to do this, to be the same. Do I swallow my pride, endure a night of intense body anxiety, and wear a dress that makes me feel Uncomfortable or do I drop out of the wedding party entirely? Are bridesmaid dresses just supposed to be ugly?

[B]

Look, you know, I. To the bridesmaids and wedding girlies. Why do all the bridesmaids dresses. I get it. The uniformity and the pictures and yada, yada, yada. But I see many, like, pictures of them on social media where every bridesmaid, they do a similar color, but they can do different silhouettes.

[A]

And I get, now you can't get crazy.

[B]

You can't come in a ball gown and everyone else is like a column dress. But, like, why does every dress have to be the same? Like, I think this person should allow them to do the same color and be conscious of your friends with different body types.

[D]

You.

[B]

Satin don't look good on everybody. Satin is a very specific fabric that looks good on certain body types. And I'm assuming it may be something like this. Like, just let people do different silhouettes and different fabric, different fabrics, but the same color is a satin.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I'm assuming, though satin is. Is a very unforgiving fabric.

[A]

I think satin can look good on all body types, to be honest. I think if you're just wearing the right shapewear, it can always look flattering, regardless of your body type. But I will say this. I want to think about the bride for a second, and then I think about the bridesmaid for a second.

[D]

Okay?

[A]

I think that the brides. The bride just wants what she wants. And this is one day where I'm asking you to just do the thing I want you to do. This day is not about you. This day is about me. I can consider you, but I am going to prioritize myself in my day, because this is my day. You know what I mean? And I understand not. I understand wearing something you don't feel good in. Like, if I was part of your bridal shower and you're like, I want everyone to wear those thong leotards that Rihanna was selling. Was wearing. I'm like, I would feel uncomfortable, but

[B]

it's my day, and you have to wear it.

[A]

I would. If I. If I really felt that uncomfortable, I would probably just be like, I will opt to be a part of the people sitting in the chair. No, Then I.

[B]

You do it.

[A]

I'm also really comfortable not going to things great. Like, I don't. I don't. I don't get a ton of fomo. Only get FOMO is when I'm at something that I'm already at and I'm. I don't know, I want to know what happens next. But if I'm not there, I'm like, I would say to you, honestly, if you feel that strongly, if you really want all your people in your party to wear these. These thong Leards, and I'm like, I would offer you that I can sit in the audience and just walk and go, no, and I'll be okay. Then I'll see you the next day and I'll check in and I hope your day goes well. And I. And I genuinely would not have any hard feelings.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, I, like, I really wouldn't care. I'd be like, girl, I. I would think it was weird that you were like, no, you can't sit in the audience. I would think you're being petty. And I would actually have problems with that. Cuz I think you're being weird about it. But if you're like, we don't have any seats.

[B]

We're at capacity.

[A]

I would think it was weird. I would be like. I would be like, I think you're being weird. You could bring in a chair. But honestly, it's your day. I really don't care that much. But I will always remember that you did that. And I think it's bizarre. And now you are, like, kind of. You have a very big demerit in my mind. Yeah, for sure. Because I'm not asking to change the way we're dressing. I'm just asking to not wear the thing.

[B]

But if it's in the audience, it throws off the balance. And then I have to Pay An Extra $1,000 for your.

[A]

For your chair. Again, like I said, I always think of you weird. I will always think that you're being petty and shady and weird. Now I will never forget that.

[B]

Petty, shady, and weird.

[A]

And I agree. And I'll never forget. I'll be like, why is it cherry? $1,000. I think you're lying. I. I genuinely think you're lying. So we're at Chartreus.

[B]

My mom, it's very expensive here, babe.

[A]

I've been at Chartreuse. My mom, it's not that expensive. I've been to church. I had a military church. It was 80 for two people.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

I want to be clear. I've had that on ubereats.

[B]

And all you had was a glass of water?

[A]

No, I. I took. So I was thanking my friend Braden for before I lived here. I was like, I want to thank Braden for, like, he did something for me. I think it was with. I think it was with. He helped me out on the Chicks and Katya show, I want to say. And yeah, like bacon wrapped apples, $8.

[D]

Those are bar snacks. That's the cheapest thing.

[A]

Well, go down the plate. 15 for a plate, $20 for the cheese board, main course, 27, roast chicken, 26. I told you I wasn't expensive. We. We spent $80 and we were in and out. And I remember that from.

[B]

From before you lived here. Just remember, 80 bucks.

[A]

It was like. It was like probably 83. It was in the. Cause I remember thinking myself, I remember asking around, like, I want to take Braden. So I want to thank Braden a lot. What's the fanciest place? And everyone said, oh, the Chateau Marmar over on Sunset.

[B]

You know what's most more expensive? Where? I just told you a town ago, the restaurant.

[A]

It was very expensive. Yes, it was expensive.

[B]

Lucia La.

[A]

So I. So anyway, I went there and I was like, oh, this is expensive. It was like. It was. I'm telling you, I've literally spent it on Ubereats before. I was like, I'm kind of gagged.

[B]

Let me say something.

[A]

I. Once I got.

[B]

I'm into my business to get back at this.

[A]

What I feel is, I think that the bridesmaid should allow the bride to have exactly what she wants and. And say, is there another capacity? I can either participate in your wedding as part of the party, or I'm happy to just sit back and watch it and just cheer for you and apply for your day. And if the bride is going to be weird, like, you can't even come. I think the bride is actually messy.

[B]

Well, I think it's really weird. I don't think it's going to be that easy because obviously when you ask someone to be a bridesmaid, it's a very big con, Very, very big commitment. It's because that person is very important to you, especially in your life, and you want them to be in the pictures and you want the whole thing. So I think. And again, I know the uniformity of it all being the same thing. And Amber, you got married and did all your bridesmaids wear the same thing?

[D]

Can you come over here and talk onto this mic?

[B]

Yeah. So we're introducing Taylor's sister Amber to the podcast.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Okay. I did get married and you guys and all your bridesmaids had the same dress on and they all wore the same dress.

[A]

Was there drama?

[B]

No. But I will say that we all kind of have the same.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Build.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Okay. And also, I would put their opinion and like, kind of take that into consideration, though, like, picking out a dress because I would want them to feel comfy.

[A]

But there's so many opinions. I mean, like, thank you so much, but, like, what do you do? What do you do when, like, the. The one girl, like, for example, let's say I was like, alternative, and I'm like, I don't wear pink and you want us in pink. And I.

[B]

Well, that's crazy.

[A]

I wear black all the time. I wear the black lip liner. That's who I am. You've known this with me for years. If you really, like, if it's going to cause you so much discomfort in your body that you're like, you're going to be at the wedding covering your body and, like, not feeling good about yourself. The only other option would be unless you've already ordered the dress. Like, everyone can get a dress in different silhouettes in the. In the. In the exact same fabric and color. Otherwise it. I do think it looks weird to have one person that. Because the. The. In. In theory, the one lady who should be standing on the photo is the bride.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And maybe the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But they need to be. In my opinion. They need to be. They need to tone it down, too.

[B]

That's what I'm saying.

[A]

So I've either put on your bolero and your ugly column dress.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

That's what all the moms wear. Blairos and ugly column dresses.

[B]

Wow. I have again, we're gonna be the dead horse. That's what I was saying. Like, the same color, different silhouettes.

[A]

But everyone, though.

[B]

Yeah, everyone. Not just one person. I think that is a nice thing I've seen. I think that that looks really dope. But again, I'm not a bride. I have not gotten married, so I can't.

[A]

Would you want your bride maid wearing the same thing?

[B]

No, I would. No. First of all, I don't think I would do bright. I would go. If I was to get married, I would do go. The gabby Wendy and Robbie Hoffman approach. So dope, fierce. They just went to, like, a chapel, took some pictures, and it's very lo fi. Very, very, very cute. Cutesy.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Next question.

[A]

Something about Robert Hoffman rubbed in the wrong way.

[B]

What?

[A]

So Robbie Hoffman is like, I love Robbie Hoffman. Robbie Hoffman's like, I'm not one of those. I'm a normal gay. I'm not one of those weird they. Them gays. Robbie Hoppins, like, leaning and just like, she's. She's kind of like, leaning to, like, what happened to normal gays?

[B]

Did she say this?

[C]

This is not the night. I'm like, I'm not gay like that. You know, somebody like that is looking at me. I'm like, oh, no, no, no.

[A]

I'm not one of those.

[C]

I'm not that gay. You know? Like, I don't feel gay with Gabby because I'm like, okay. One's like, kind of doing the boy weird thing and one's a girl. Like, we kind of have a hetero, like, heteronormative lifestyle. Like, the only gay thing about me is that I'm gay. But other than that, I'm not even gay. But if another lesbian like me, like, or even butcher than me with the buzz cut and the whole hit on me, I'd be like, what are you gay? Like, that, to me, is so gay. And it happens.

[A]

It'd be too much. I don't like it. I don't think it's. I don't think the bit is funny. I don't think it's a funny bit.

[B]

Yeah, I can get down with that. But I think it's a bit because I've seen. I met Rob, like, a few times

[A]

out and Robbie's been very vocally anti they themmy. Yeah, but which is. Which is odd considering the way that she presents.

[B]

Well, I think that in her. I think that that's also a bit. I do think that bit is funny saying that they them had a bad rollout, which is why she can't get down with it. Because that's the whole premise of the bit is that they them had a bad rollout. She was like. She's like, I was they them until the rollout was bad. So I'm like, I'm going back to just being a lesbian or. Sorry. Or just being a woman.

[A]

I do think that the. I do think the premise is funny, but I do think the basis of the premise is like, gay people are getting weird, and I want to be a normal. I want to be. I think the prim. The premise is gay people are getting weird and I want to be a normal person because we need to be more heteronormative. Which is a word that she used.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That she's pretty proud of being heteronormative.

[B]

Okay, I can get down with your thing that the. That the bit is not funny, but I don't. Again, maybe we can. Maybe she'll. She'll. She'll talk more stuff about it. But I. I don't think that's her stance. I think she's trying to do a bit. That's not funny.

[A]

I also don't think it's a bit because, I mean, my. Well, no, I don't think it's a bit.

[B]

Anyway, I met her out a few times and that doesn't seem to be her thing. Like her vibe. Like out at the thing out of the comedy clubs or out at like the bar. Like, she seems to not. That's not.

[A]

But anyway, maybe she thinks you're a normal gay.

[B]

I'm not friends with her like that, so I don't know. Hi. Sibling rivalry. I just moved to San Francisco from New York City. I met this cute guy through. Through mutual friends. We've been texting and having good conversations. He recently invited me to. To nude gay yoga. But I can't tell if he's trying to hook up or if this is just like a San Francisco thing. People do. Valid naked gay yoga is a. Is a sex thing. Right. Like, everybody talks about how it's not sexual, but if it. But if it really wasn't, there wouldn't be gays. Only nude yoga. How do I tell if he's trying to hook up or not? Okay, I. I've had. I have friends who do gay nude yoga and it is not sexual.

[A]

I think if everyone keeps telling you it's not sexual, I think you're just horny.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like you're. You're gonna be up there in a vinyasa, bricked up and.

[B]

But it's the thing. Sometimes, sometimes people do get bricked up, but it's not like they're not trying to fucking yoga. It's like, it's just your body's naturally, dudes get hard. You see a dick that you like or an asshole that, like, you get hard, but no one's fucking. In hot yoga. In, in gay hot yoga.

[A]

I would say this. When you brought up that it was San Francisco, this change San Francisco, this changes everything. It could actually be completely non sexual. Not all nudist artists everywhere, they want

[B]

to go into someone else.

[A]

And I don't know this. I want to be sick. They just want to take their clothes off. I am not a nudist. I don't really. I think nudists kind of have a bad rollout, as Robin Hobbit would say.

[B]

Harm and her husband at a nudist colony.

[A]

Joy Behar. Yeah, Joy's the nudist.

[B]

She. She was not nude. He was nude.

[A]

Oh, she was wearing clothes. I think that nudists have a weird reputation specifically because they feel comfortable being Nude around all people, including children. Which makes it. Which makes them. That gives them a lot of bad pr. But I think that the concept. Your phone is so distracting. Yes. The concept of extra. The concept of feeling like your body is your body and you shouldn't feel weird about it, I think is actually quite pure and is really sound. But then the idea of, like, but there will be creeps there looking at your kids is where, like. Because how do you. Oh, my God. I sound like a fucking conservative. How do you keep the creeps out of the camp looking at the nude bodies? You know what I mean?

[B]

How is this in nude yoga?

[A]

I'm talking about nudist.

[B]

Okay. So you. Okay. I was like, there are kids at the new game.

[A]

No, no, no, no. But I. But I also feel like. So, like, for example, I don't get the people who want to walk around without shoes on. I will never understand y'.

[D]

All.

[A]

I mean, I grew up in the south where it is really hot and the street will cook your feet. Like, the asphalt gets so hot. You cannot be big.

[B]

That's cool. But I think that's why. I think that's. Don't tell me why. Both our feet are pretty callous at the bottom. Like, I grew up in St. Lucia. Your feet are gnarled. I grew up in St. Louis.

[A]

Those are your scrubbers. Honey, honey, Ripping through the shoes, girl. We have seen your feet ripping through the shoes.

[B]

We have videos of you to get

[A]

a pedicure and ripping through the shoes.

[B]

The lady had to pull out a chainsaw to have.

[A]

That is not true. I literally. The video is me being like, oh, my God, I'm tickled. That's a whole video. There's no footage of my feet looking rough anywhere on the Internet.

[B]

I grew up.

[A]

You're the one who had to get literal surgery to make those big dogs look. How many.

[B]

You should do the same.

[A]

And when does it kick in?

[B]

And. Honey, it's kicked in. Honey, you want to. Honey, don't even take the dogs out, baby.

[A]

No. You're, like, ripping my jeans.

[B]

They're not wearing jeans.

[A]

I was. And yeah. I mean, yeah, I. I like, when

[B]

I grew up, I grew up. I never wore shoes. I was always barefoot, going everywhere.

[A]

But, like, I remember living in Alabama and being like. I remember because there were times where I would go outside barefoot, but you have to stand on the. The driveway because the driveway is light, so it doesn't get as hot. If you're in the street, your feet will cook. You could literally cook an egg on the street. It is that.

[B]

Oh yeah, for sure.

[A]

And you have your feet on that.

[B]

Girl, that's just how we grew up.

[A]

Did y' all do that in Texas? Barefoot on the asphalt?

[D]

I did.

[A]

I would walk on the asphalt.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Girl, I will say I had like huge blisters.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, okay. We're not standing on it.

[D]

They said that they did, but they would get huge blisters on their.

[B]

And we're not standing on the asphalt

[A]

like, oh, this feels cozy.

[B]

No, you're like, ah. You're walking around. You're not just standing your feet there.

[A]

Put on some flip flops. This is crazy. Anyways, the back to the news is.

[B]

I don't think, to answer your question, nude, gay yoga is not sexual. I've seen it. I have friends that go to it here in LA and there's people. People are not in nude gay yoga fucking. They just want to do yoga nude and with other queer minded people.

[A]

Yeah, I don't under. I mean, I've recently started sleeping in the nude sometimes.

[B]

Oh, wait, wait, why?

[D]

Why?

[B]

I. I don't understand how people sleep with clothes on. I.

[A]

First of all, if you're in the nude, you can like smush up your penis or your penis can just get caught under your thigh or like your. Jesus Christ. Let me see what's going on over there. Don't touch me. Caught under your thigh? No, like your penis can like get like pulled like your pee. But when you're wearing briefs, it is like nice and it is packed. It's not going.

[B]

Stop just doing this to the camera. Jesus Christ.

[A]

It's not going anywhere. Now my flaccid penis is not crazy. Crazy. I'm a grower, not a shower. But it still does stretch to the length of my erect penis. So if it gets caught under the leg, it can. Like if you're laying on your. If you're laying on your side, your penis can just get smushed and weird and like pulled in a funny way.

[B]

I've never experienced that. And I've sleeped in the nude since I was probably like 11 years old. And maybe not probably around 12, 13 when I got into high school and I did not know.

[A]

But also when you're wearing briefs, your genitals are just so contained. They have nowhere to go. You're. They're all just nice and like contained.

[B]

You feel congested.

[A]

It does not. That's why I don't understand people who do not want to wear briefs. Like if people who are wearing boxers, I don't get what y' all doing with your lives? I don't get how you're walking around like that. I don't understand why you don't want your.

[B]

What did you. When did you transition to briefs? Because I wore boxers until probably college.

[A]

Briefs my entire childhood. And then I wore. I had like a brief stand where I wear boxers because it was cool and I didn't like it. Also, when you pull up your boxers, your whole is above your pants. Like you put your boxes on and then you pull the pants up. Your whole. All your boxers sticking out of the top of your pants. You have to. You have to.

[B]

I have one box.

[A]

You have to do all this.

[B]

I won't box this long. I remember all the mechanics of it.

[A]

And boxer briefs are. Boxer briefs are fine. I will say sometimes. Sometimes I have to do a boxer brief day because the thighs be touching. So if the thighs are touching, I'm gonna have to bust out the box of Breathe basically wearing Mormon Girl. If I'm having a. If I'm having a chafey day, a girl's gotta bust out briefs. The boxer briefs.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Otherwise, I wear briefs all the time. I'm a never nude.

[D]

When I was in middle school, I wanted to be cool, so I wanted to wear boxers, but I didn't like them. So I would wear briefs and then wear boxers over them.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, sometimes I. Sometimes I. I still go commando to this day. Not today, but sometimes I do.

[A]

Yeah, we. We notice it, and it's grotesque. It's vulgar.

[B]

Anyway, so you want to get to the last question.

[A]

You guys want to be.

[B]

We have a podcast to do, Bob. We have to keep it at a certain time.

[A]

Hi, Bob and Monet. Ariana Grande is going on tour. My friends and I. My friends and I all waited in the digital line to get tickets. I never got in, but my friend did and got a block of tickets for our friend group. My boyfriend paid him for two tickets for me and him, but we broke up a month later. The concert is now up and I don't want to go with my ex. I asked him if I could buy the ticket from him and take somebody else and he said no. He wants to go and thinks we can go together. Resale tickets are now like $2,000 for terrible ticks and I can't afford that. My friend who got the tickets got paid by my ex, but never actually transferred the tickets over to him. How shady and toxic is it? Just go and tell my friend to transfer my tickets, transfer me the tickets, and then just venmo. My ex. The money after.

[D]

Oh,

[B]

I answer the last one first. Want to go first?

[A]

I will say this. I feel like if you make financial plans to go somewhere with someone and y' all broke up, I think that. But if you. You either gotta go and be uncomfortable for the evening or you gotta bite the bullet and not go.

[B]

But what about the money? You're out.

[A]

That's what biting the bullet is.

[B]

Oh, got it.

[A]

Yeah, you gotta bite the bullet. But like, either. I'm gonna go with my ex because this is a big event. It's Ariana Grande and tickets are sold out.

[B]

I try to get tickets for that shit and I'm so mad because you couldn't get any. Yeah, I couldn't get any.

[A]

There's $2,000 tickets.

[B]

Yeah, I'm not doing that. Well, you ain't that mad cuz $2,000 for like nosebleed.

[A]

You're too good.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

For Grande.

[B]

Correct.

[D]

Gang.

[A]

Gang.

[B]

And Lena.

[A]

Donald's not funny.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

And has no fashion.

[B]

Correct.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I think either you go with. But I will go.

[A]

I would.

[B]

I will go with my ex.

[A]

And I would. I'm going to have a good time. But I'm.

[B]

I'm a have in my little gummy.

[A]

This is the fox. When I say I don't want it,

[B]

like, literally, like, I would go and I would have the best time I can and damned if he's uncomfortable. I'm gonna have a good time. I'm gonna be. I'm gonna take my mushrooms.

[A]

It doesn't make you uncomfortable though.

[B]

It wouldn't make me uncomfortable. I'm telling you. I would not. I'm gonna. I'm gonna see Ariana Grande especially. We sit in line to get good ass tickets.

[A]

What if your ex does something to make it uncomfortable?

[B]

Like what? Let's give an example.

[A]

Let's say your ex is there with your other ex.

[B]

He's not there because it's only the two tickets. So that's not a possibility.

[A]

No, because your ex is still going. So what I'm saying is you and the ex are still going, so. Oh, because what other. Because there's a block of tickets. There's a block of tickets. So in this block of tickets for our friend group. Yeah, so. So let's say there's four of you. Let's say there's five of y' all on this block. Okay? So two of them are you and your ex. One of them is a friend who bought the tickets, and then two of them are other people. But this one here, you're actually talking to right now.

[B]

I'm talking to that person, but, like, nicely.

[A]

But you're, like, talking. You. You fooled around a little over the pants action, but it wasn't a lot for you.

[B]

Over the pants. What were we in middle school?

[A]

Well, you weren't even wearing underwear, so I guess they basically were grabbing your penis.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And this one is a stranger. Your ex and this one are fully making out while maintaining eye contact with you during the song. We can't be friends. We can't be friends.

[B]

I'm like, go off. It'll be annoying. But I'll be. But. But to be fair, I would probably be so. So high on shrooms. I probably wouldn't be afraid.

[A]

Why are you enjoying the concerts if you're so fucked up?

[B]

Cause the sound and the music and the lights. You don'.

[A]

His music's not good enough without.

[B]

But then it's. It's heightening it.

[A]

It gives you.

[B]

Basically, when I take mushrooms, it gives me synesthesia. So like, that will be happening afterwards. I'll probably call you.

[A]

All this to. To to hear. The song is blue. All this to to to hear.

[D]

So now you're.

[A]

Now the number seven is floating around in your head.

[B]

And. And that makes purple. So that. But absolutely that won't be happening. I'll be living my life euphoric. Then I come up like. Like, and I'll tell you what happened

[A]

on the show, because I don't do drugs. I just don't get why people want to do drugs to. I guess I do get it because I'm an alcoholic. But like. But also for me, it was a problem. Like, I was like, can I just enjoy. I'm not judging you, but I'm like. I'm trying to understand. Like, I'm like, can I just enjoy this thing?

[B]

You're enjoy. But, but, but, but that's. That's saying, like, I'm not. I am enjoying it, but I'm, like, heightening my enjoyment.

[D]

You know what?

[A]

I don't understand it because I don't do it. And maybe we fear what we don't understand. Maybe Whoever said that 8. Was it Kennedy?

[B]

I think it was Jesus.

[A]

We fear what we don't understand.

[B]

That's what Jesus said in the Garden of Gethsemane.

[A]

We fear that which we don't understand.

[B]

Watch. Three, two, one. Jesus.

[A]

Oh, it's just like a thing.

[B]

Jesus of Tupac. One of them said it.

[D]

Dan Brown from the Da Vinci Code.

[A]

Dan, the.

[B]

What are you watching?

[A]

I think it was Socrates. It's the Screenwriter Dan Brown. And he put it, said it in DaVinci Code.

[B]

Was that song.

[A]

I never seen DaVinci Code.

[B]

I have never seen that.

[A]

But I heard it's like, then it's like up there with like the Matrix.

[B]

Really?

[A]

It's a movie.

[D]

It was a book first.

[A]

Yeah, like everything act like he ate with that. Oh, you mean like basically every movie? Shut your ass up. But, you know, wait, is it. Is it Dan the screenwriter? Is it from the book? Is it from the movie?

[D]

It's from the book.

[A]

It's from the book. Oh, shut your little skinny ass up. Can I have a conversation with you real quick?

[B]

Oh, God, no.

[A]

Thank you all for coming to the podcast today. Do you. I said no. Well, I don't. I'm not asking. I'm asking for Sam. But I don't care about it. I want to have a conversation about how I was talking about my use of the word fat. I say fat as a descriptive and not as a pejorative. And it's because of this fats rights activist who wrote the TV show Shrill. She did an episode of this American Life called Call Me, Tell Me I'm fat. What's her name? Aidy Bryant.

[B]

Isn't she from snl?

[A]

Nothing. She's the actor. But she wrote it too, though now because she's the one who used to work for Dan Savage.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

80 Brian is from SNL, but she plays that. She plays this woman in. In the show.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And it's ladies to work for Dan Savage and the sex columnist.

[B]

I mean, the sex writer. Yeah, I work.

[A]

And she was.

[D]

It was developed by Eddie Bryant, so I assume she wrote it.

[A]

Okay, maybe.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And she's like, I'm fat. Like, it's okay. Like I'm fat.

[D]

She wrote. She wrote it.

[A]

So I'm like. It is okay to describe something as. Or a person is fat without it being like a pejorative.

[B]

Well, I think that. I think that. Sure. But like that, I think. But it's not your word to. Because there are people who are fat that are not comfortable with being. With fat being used as a descriptor to describe them.

[A]

There are people who are fat who are not comfortable with plus size. So now what do we do?

[B]

I know what I'm saying. But it's not for someone who is not fat. To clarify, I've been fat. I have as well.

[A]

So it is mine, actually.

[B]

But I mean, but you are not someone that. But you are not someone who someone will look and describe as fat.

[A]

I'm not fat. Right now. But I have been fat.

[B]

Exactly. So I, So I'm hyp. I'm saying, but you right now, as it stands, you are not someone. Someone can when I look at you and say, I'm not.

[A]

I am not fat now.

[B]

Exactly. Someone look at you would not look at you say that fat guy. So I think so for people who are fat, they find it to be highly offensive. And I've met a lot of fat people, obviously. Yeah, there's. There's some for everything.

[A]

So the question is so, like, so because there are people who are like, why would you call me plus? What do you mean, plus size?

[B]

My.

[A]

This is. I am a normal size. I'm not plus size. I am a normal sized person and

[B]

I'm fat because if anything, the people there, there are trans people who say who like the word tranny. And some don't. Right. So, like, you can't. But it's not for that isn't. That's different because that is an identity. But I'm saying with fat, I feel the same way that, like, I cannot tell a trans person if to use it or not to use it. Just I can't look at a fat person.

[A]

I'm not telling fat. But they can't say they don't want to be called fat. Yeah, that is not what I'm saying.

[B]

You're saying. But you want the express, right? To use it to describe people.

[A]

I'm honoring a fat person who's like, I prefer the word fat. And several fat people are like, I have. I prefer the word fat as opposed to like plus size or big. But like, my bones aren't big. I have normal sized bones. I have a normal body. It has fat on it.

[B]

I think I, I. What I use, the word I was, I use is heavyset. Because that is the thing. Like, you are heavy. Right? So I think heavy set, that seems to be a one. Across the world, people are like, oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[A]

My mom would say heavyset.

[B]

Yeah. I think heavyset is a way to describe someone because fat feels mean. Just like I was saying a couple years ago on the podcast, calling someone a Jew, to me, that feels, that feels aggressive. I know that's how some people. I don't like to use that because it feels mean. It feels.

[A]

Well, I would not call someone a Jew. I would say someone is Jewish because I feel like you can.

[B]

No, we had this whole discuss on the podcast and Jacob was like, yeah, that is a way to do. You could. But I wouldn't.

[A]

I don't and what I'm saying is, I would not call someone a Jew because it feels. Because that's crazy.

[B]

Yeah, it feels crazy to say, but that's what people say. I do not want to use that word.

[A]

Why not?

[B]

Because it feels aggressive. And I, even though Jewish folk may be okay with it, I don't feel comfortable saying it. So the same with fat. I don't feel comfortable calling someone fat. I, I, I genuinely say, oh, yeah, the heavyset woman or the heavyset guy.

[A]

Lots of people don't like that too. They don't, they don't like.

[B]

I've never heard someone say they don't like heavyset. I think I never heard that one.

[A]

I really implore you to, to listen to that, which I've been telling you to listen to for years. You still haven't tell me I'm fat. It's only one hour. It is a brilliant podcast. It is. It says so much about fat bodies.

[B]

Well, as someone who was fat, I know a lot of fat people. Genuine, generally. I've never heard anyone take umbrage or issue with calling with some heavyset.

[A]

Well, I mean, the last thing I'll say, we do got to go out. Are we in an hour already?

[D]

Yeah, but I mean, we have time to keep on going.

[A]

Yeah, but I was saying, like, like the, what the, what I've seen people say is like all these words to, like, avoid saying fat, feel offensive. Like the finding many ways to not say fat feels more offensive. It's like, it's like little people. Little people are little people, and they like.

[B]

I mean, from what I say, always the acceptable term. I know.

[A]

Little people is a perfectly acceptable term.

[B]

Right, but dwarf is rude. Dwarf and little people are the dwarfism. Right, sorry. Dwarf is, is, is, is, is a pejorative.

[A]

That is a pejorative. Yeah, but little people and dwarfs are the terms that people prefer because the

[B]

show is called Little. Little Women.

[C]

La.

[B]

Little Men. Little Men New York.

[A]

There's a little in New York.

[B]

I think that was a Little Men. I don't know what city was. It was a little man. I think

[A]

there's a movie called Little Men.

[D]

Yeah, it's about, it's, it's said in Massachusetts chronicles the heroic struggles of Joe Behar as she attempts to manage Joe Bahrain.

[A]

Oh, my God, how old is Joy?

[D]

Oh, oh, okay, so there's Little Women, the tv, the Biler Inglis Wilder, and the TV show Little Men.

[A]

Little Women is not about little Women. No, no, no. Little Women in LA is about little people.

[B]

Yeah, that's what I said. I was saying the Cities.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Little Women is a. Is that. Is that a movie with Kate Winslet?

[D]

No, this is a TV show.

[B]

No, Little Women.

[D]

Little Women.

[B]

It is a great. I think that if that's the Kate Winslet movie I'm talking about, it is such a good movie.

[D]

I mean, there are a bunch of different versions of it.

[C]

Oh.

[D]

Oh, no, sorry. I was thinking of Little House on the Prairie. Little Women is also a different book

[A]

talk and a TV show.

[B]

Anyway, we're going in a whole new thing.

[D]

Little Women is by Louisa May Alcott,

[A]

and none of them are Little Women,

[B]

but I don't think they're using it. That's her. Maybe they're you little.

[A]

I mean, it was written in 18. Yeah.

[D]

When they say Little Women, it's because it's about girls who are growing into their womanhood and becoming women. So they are. They're on the cusp of becoming. It's about growing into your womanhood. So they're women, but they are still little women.

[A]

I mean, it's also written in 1868. I don't think the term little people was actually being used in 1860. I don't think.

[B]

What did they use for little?

[A]

Probably very offensive terms. Yeah, probably. Probably worse than the M term.

[B]

What did. Where did that M term even come from?

[A]

I don't know the etymology of that word.

[B]

I do.

[A]

I do not. I can't even. I. I would just be making something up.

[B]

Well, I'm thinking of. Idit. Digits are your fingers. I don't know.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Anyway, well, that was a nice conversation.

[A]

What are you gonna do immediately after we end the podcast?

[B]

I have a. At my schedule. All right. Patty runs a tight ship over here.

[A]

We're going to check Monday's schedule, and we'll see you on the next episode of Behind.