Sibling Advicery: Drag Hoarders/Faking It

Summary

Sibling Rivalry: Sibling Advicery – Drag Hoarders / Faking It

Date: February 1, 2022
Hosts: Monét X Change & Bob the Drag Queen

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Overview

In this "Sibling Advicery" episode, drag icons and comedic powerhouses Monét X Change and Bob the Drag Queen answer listener questions on everything from polyamory, haunted houses, breakups, drag queen storage, finances, and navigating awkward sex, all in their uniquely hilarious, candid style. The duo’s banter is front and center, with tangents that cover wigs, parental drama, health insurance woes, and advice that straddles the line between practical and gloriously petty.

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Key Discussion Points & Notable Segments

1. Setting the Mood: Health, Moms & Quarantine Woes

[01:10–07:34]

• Bob’s Bad Mood: Bob admits he’s starting the pod in a terrible mood due to a stressful call with his mother, COVID quarantine, and a cold sore. Monét needles Bob for bringing his attitude to work.
  • Quote (Bob, 04:04): “I’m in a bad mood. I just got into, like, not an argument with my mom, but, like a discussion with my mom...I have coronavirus. I have a cold sore on my lip. I’m fucking tired.”
• Parent Dynamics: Both discuss how their moms expect immediate attention, leading Bob to vent about conflicting priorities.
• Health Insurance: Frank admissions of not having health insurance on Monét’s side, while Bob claims Kaiser coverage, sparking jokes about class and access.

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2. Drag, Wigs & Secret Projects

[07:34–12:13]

• Wig Antics: Bob teases Monét for wig changes, prompting playful bickering.
• Secret Project Teasing: Monét mentions a mystery outfit, leading to inside jokes and mock frustration about “annoying” podcast secrets.
  • Quote (Bob, 10:17): “Why did you bring up secrets in the podcast? Why do you do this?”
• Outfit Description: Bob tries to describe Monét’s Domino-designed ensemble (much to Monét’s delight and gentle ribbing about colorblindness).

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3. Sibling Advicery Q&A

Listener Questions Start
[12:20]

a. Polyamory & Jealousy

[12:20–18:49]

• Question: Polyamorous relationship with a jealous partner—how to navigate?
• Bob’s Take: You can't fix the partner's issues; let them work through it. Polyamory is neither innate nor impossible; anyone could try, but not everyone will want to.
  • Quote (Bob, 13:09): “You can’t work their relationship for them. You have to let them figure out what's going to go on...”
• Jacob’s Experience: (Bob’s partner Jacob chimes in) He learned about polyamory after meeting Bob; before that, just assumed monogamy was the default.
  • Quote (Jacob, 15:41): “I think I'd only had monogamous relationships before Caldwell...it literally just had not occurred to me.”
• Monét’s View: The non-poly partner must want to adapt, not just learn about polyamory.

b. Paranormal Encounters

[19:12–23:02]

• Monét: Believes in ghosts but has never had a direct experience; acknowledges it sounds silly.
• Bob: Has had vivid sleep paralysis and dream-predictions about his grandmother’s death but chalks it up to imagination, not spirits.
  • Quote (Bob, 21:24): “I saw this angel...he was like, don’t go to Mississippi this summer, your grandma’s gonna die. And then he just disappeared.”

c. Breakup Poetry – To Share or Not?

[24:49–28:42]

• Question: Listener wrote a scathing breakup poem and wonders if they should send it to their ex.
• Monét: Only reason not to send it is wanting to “gag” the ex at a public performance; if you want the drama, go for it.
  • Quote (Monét, 25:56): “The only reason to not send it to him is because you’re trying to get a little dig in and you’re trying to gag him.”
• Bob’s Advice: Don’t send it out of spite or to warn him; wait until you’re ready to be public or want to soften the blow.
• Playful Argument: Bob accuses Monét of not being as petty as she pretends.

d. "Friends with Benefits" Boundaries

[29:12–33:38]

• Question: Drag queen enjoys casual sex with a guy she doesn’t like beyond the bedroom; how to set boundaries?
• Bob: Be honest—don't string them along. Tell them you only want a sexual relationship.
  • Quote (Bob, 29:48): “Do not string someone along emotionally. It is so mean…you don’t have to lie.”
• Monét: Suggests a softer “let him get the hint” approach, but Bob warns against white lies—be upfront for everyone’s sake.

e. Phone Addiction

[34:52–37:46]

• Question: Listener asks how to reduce phone usage, especially as a pandemic coping crutch.
• Monét: Recommends apps that lock your phone or let someone else hold the unlock code.
• Bob: Challenges the “war on phones”—if it brings joy and doesn’t disrupt life, why worry? But, use structure if it disrupts productivity.
  • Quote (Bob, 35:46): “If your phone is bringing you joy, it’s not hurting you…it’s a great way to connect to people.”

f. Drag Storage & Hoarding

[37:49–42:14]

• Question: Space-starved drag queen asks for organization solutions.
• Monét: Advocates storage units, especially outside pricey neighborhoods, and explains how drag paraphernalia “multiplies”—don’t throw anything away.
  • Quote (Monét, 39:11): “You never know what the fuck you’re going to need...that’s why drag queens never throw shit away.”
• Bob: Once gave up his living room to drag storage; teams up with others for common storage space (with caveats about who you share with).

g. Regrets in Their 20s & Financial Advice

[43:00–51:22]

• Question: Baby gay listener asks for advice on navigating adulthood.
• Bob: Financial literacy is key; urges starting a Roth IRA, even if anti-capitalism is the “vibe.”
  • Quote (Bob, 44:11): “If you are under 25, start a Roth IRA.”
• Monét: Knowledge gives options; learn about finances early for long-term security and flexibility, even as the capitalist system remains.
• Lively Debate: Bob argues that money doesn’t buy true “freedom”—the more you have, the more you’re beholden.

h. Broke-ness & Financial Safety Nets

[51:22–56:05]

• Argument: Bob claims Monét has "never been broke" because she always had a parental safety net; Monét counters this is a flawed distinction—lack of personal funds can feel just as stressful, regardless of family resources.
  • Quote (Bob, 54:26): “That is truly spoken like someone who has never not had an option…”
  • Monét retorts (54:38): “You’re conflating two ideas…just because people who love and support you have money doesn’t mean you are not broke if you don’t have money in your pocket.”

i. “Their Sex is Trash” – How to Break It Gently

[56:09–62:00]

• Question: How to tell someone the sex is bad? Should you “fake it” or move on?
• Monét: If you don’t want a relationship, just move on. For a long-term situation, sexual compatibility matters—don’t force it.
• Bob: If you deeply value the person, it’s possible to stay; otherwise, just let things fade, no need to spell it out or insult.
  • Quote (Bob, 57:50): “You don’t have to insult them on the way out the door.”

j. Sex in Long-Term Relationships

[60:00–61:30]

• Discussion: Monét can't imagine a sexless relationship at her age; Bob points out how common they become over time, especially as couples age.
  • Quote (Bob, 60:10): “You might be shocked at how many sexless relationships are in the world…”

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Iconic Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Polyamory: “Polyamory is not a sexuality...you can learn anything. But does she want to?” – Monét [18:42]
• Health Insurance shade: “Okay, so you call hospitals because you got health insurance…Wow.” – Monét [06:32]
• Drag Hoarding: “You never know...that’s why drag queens never throw shit away.” – Monét [39:11]
• On Being Broke: “That is truly spoken like someone who has never not had an option.” – Bob [54:26]
• Financial Literacy: “If you are under 25, start a Roth IRA.” – Bob [44:11]
• On Phone Addiction: “I blocked him immediately. I was like, mind your fucking business.” – Bob (re: TikTok’s scroll warning) [37:19]
• Sibling Bickering: “Ever since you put that wig on…you’ve been wild, girl. Wild.” – Bob [63:12]
• Podcast Closing: “You can’t have that podcast. We can shut this one down. We can start from scratch, mister.” – Bob [64:59]

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Overall Tone & Final Thoughts

This episode is densely packed with classic Sibling Rivalry chaos: rapid-fire banter, affectionate insults, real talk about money and relationships, and laugh-out-loud digressions about everything from sleep paralysis to drag storage. While the advice sometimes mixes sincerity with shade, it reflects the genuine friendship and lived experience both hosts bring to the table—as drag queens, performers, and queer people navigating adult life.

For listeners new and old, it’s a showcase of Bob and Monét’s chemistry and their willingness to spill, support, or simply cackle about the ups and downs of queer life and drag—and to occasionally call each other out when the situation demands.

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Episode Timestamps

| Time | Segment | |------------|--------------------------------------------------| | 01:10 | Hosts begin, Bob’s mood & mom drama | | 07:34 | Wigs banter and secret project teasers | | 12:20 | Listener Q&A: Polyamory and jealousy | | 19:12 | Haunted houses and ghost stories | | 24:49 | Breakup poetry: to send or not to send | | 29:12 | Friends-with-benefits boundaries | | 34:52 | Phone addiction: tips and philosophy | | 37:49 | Drag hoarding and storage strategies | | 43:00 | Regrets in your 20s & financial advice | | 51:22 | Broke-ness, privilege, and financial safety nets | | 56:09 | “Bad sex” – honesty versus tact | | 60:00 | Sex in long-term relationships | | 63:12 | Closing mayhem, final bickering |

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For anyone who missed the episode, this summary delivers both the insights and the laughs—plus all the delicious mess between two of drag’s sharpest minds.

Transcript

[A]

I'm Kiana. And I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was

[B]

a thing, I never turned back.

[A]

I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know, and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use.

[B]

It's like I can't stop.

[A]

I'm addicted. Start your free [e-mail].

[C]

close your eyes. Exhale. Feel your body relax and let go

[B]

of whatever you're carrying today.

[C]

Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts. Oh my gosh, they're so fast.

[B]

And breathe.

[C]

Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste.

[A]

Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order.

[C]

1-800-contacts.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

Hello. Are you finally ready?

[B]

Whatever. I am in a mood today. I'm over it and I'm upset already like at the out of the game.

[A]

Oh, well, you better fix your mood. Fix your mood cause this is your job. And that show up to their job mad that that's not everybody else problem. When you show up to your job and you mad it's not your co workers problem. That's. That's your you need to fix yourself. It's not our responsibility to make you happy.

[B]

Yeah. Anyway, I once had a whole conversation with you about showing up with attitude problem.

[A]

Balsamic vinegar.

[B]

I once had a whole conversation with you about showing up to work with attitude problem. It turned into a whole episode.

[A]

I was like, well, the ball is in your court.

[B]

Can we also run back all the clips of Monet showing up to work with a nasty ass attitude? Run those clips.

[A]

Can we show the clips of Bob coming to work with a nasty attitude and not getting to a nice attitude until I'm crying, sad or upset. Can we run those tapes?

[B]

Yeah. And if you could spill, the one

[A]

about crying is literally that first of

[B]

all, I wasn't in a bad attitude that day. I was actually in a great attitude that I never thought I was in a bad attitude that day.

[A]

The listeners and the viewers would like to have a word. Bob, you were, you said you were in a bad attitude because you had just woke up and whatever and then not until I started crying. Did you start to laugh and enjoy yourself.

[B]

Oh, Maybe. Maybe that happened. So can you produce some tears so I can. So I can have some serotonin?

[A]

It's a wig. It's a wig.

[B]

What. What is. What is going on? What are you up to? What. What is the wig reveal the hat change. What is happening,

[A]

Bob? This is. This is how I live my life. You act like. You act like it is weird for me to come on this podcast and have a wig and. And, And. And stuff on.

[B]

I didn't say. I didn't say having a wig was weird. I said, what's up with, like, the wig and the change and the. The wig changes? That. That's the strange part. I've never. You think that. I think Monet change. Wearing a wig is strange. You think. You think I think it is weird for you to be in a full face with a wig on.

[A]

Well, you acting like you are. You acting brand new, son.

[B]

Anyway, you know what? Let's shift our energies with the wig change.

[A]

Let's shift our energies and our perspective, and I want to really evaluate what we're doing.

[B]

Shift your energy and I'll do my energy. What I want to do with my energy. We. We don't have a group energy. I got my energy. You got your energy.

[A]

Also, the way that you. The way you're sitting right here. When you lean your head back enough, you can see that little space in the hat. So look like you have your little toupee on again. I thought you had to pay on. I was like, did you? If you don't know, Bob is quarantined in her in a room in a hotel in New York. So I was like, did this nigga take his quarantine time and install the wig himself? I said, this is crazy.

[B]

I'm in a bad mood. I just got into, like, not an argument with my mom, but, like a discussion with my mom. And I was like, oh, my God, this woman is exhausting me. And I also have coronavirus. I have a cold sore on my lip. I'm fucking tired. I'm. I'm like, this is exhausting.

[A]

A baby.

[B]

My mom, really weird. My mom calls me. She really expects me to hang up on. Quit doing everything. Like, I don't care what I'm doing. Martha Cole really expects me to, like, hang up on people, walk out of gigs, leave rooms to have a 40 minute conversation. Yeah.

[A]

My mom cannot have a quick conversation.

[B]

Yeah. First of all, Monet does this thing. This is so annoying that you do this. By the way, were you on the phone? How is it me and we're on the phone. Instead of Monet being like, hey, hold on one second. Monet will just vanish off the face of the earth. Okay? So I was talking when I was like, monet, Hello? Monet? Monet. Monet. Monet just leaves. Doesn't say.

[A]

I said, hold on. I said, hold on.

[B]

But I didn't hear that. We were talking. Normally I say, hold on. Like, I'll get a confirmation someone heard it. So when they just left talking to somebody named Brian. I don't know who Brian is. Who's Brian?

[A]

Yes, you do. Brian. Brian works at your management company. That Brian.

[B]

Oh, you know his name is Brian, bro. No, Brian. My name is Brian. So then I called. My mom called, but I didn't know Monet was gone. So my mom was like, what are you doing? I was like, I'm talking to Monet. She goes, well, I'm sure Monet would hang up, talk to her mom. And then I was like, oh, my God, that's one. That's definitely. Monet wouldn't even answer, for starters. But then she's like, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. So then I switched back. Monet's gone. So I called my mom back, and she's like, you didn't have to hang up with Monet to talk to me. I was like, oh, my God, this woman is playing mind games. And then she was like. I told her I had Corona. I was like, I have Covid. You need to go get booster. Please get a booster shot. And she's like, well, I don't be around nobody. I said, but people at home be around people. You have to get a booster shot. Shot. Then I told her I had Covid, and she was like, why didn't you call me the minute you found you had co. I was like, because I was trying to deal with having Covid, and I was sick. And she said, but you need to. You need to call me. Like, the moment. You know, my mom wants me to call her. Like, when I stub a toe, she wants me to call her before I call the. The hospital.

[A]

Okay, so you call hospitals because. Because you. Because you got. Because you got health insurance.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Not by making fun of people that don't have health insurance that can't get the help they need.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Doesn't even make sense. And I have. I have. But I have coverage. California. I have. I have Kaiser Permanente. I don't have some fancy schmancy health. I have Kaiser. Grab me at Kaiser with everybody.

[A]

I don't have any health insurance. I don't have any. I. I missed the deadline to register again. I don't have any health insurance. I pay out of pocket to go to the doctor.

[B]

Why don't you get health insurance?

[A]

Cuz I just missed the deadline. I missed the date. I missed the date.

[B]

Oh, now. Oh, somebody's in the mood. Oh. Oh, I see. We're shifting energies as when they said shifting energies. Honey,

[A]

we're converging. While we are converging, we're becoming one. Well, I'm sorry that you have coronavirus and that you have to quarantine in New York. I'm sorry all your gigs have to get canceled.

[D]

I.

[A]

But you know.

[B]

You're spreading. I did not cancel all of my gigs. You were acting.

[A]

Oh my God. The ones for your trip.

[B]

The ones like, sorry your tour is canceled. I'm so sorry your tour is canceled. I did.

[A]

I did not say sorry, sorry, sorry your career is over. Sorry you're done.

[B]

That's literally what you say. Sorry you're quitting drag. Whoa, whoa. Beatbop. Bort. Bitch. Speak for yourself.

[A]

In case anyone is wondering, I am wearing. I am wearing Beaumo Beauty on my eyes with a little Liz cosmetic glitter. But the purple that you see is Bomo beauty.

[B]

And I am. I have. I woke up and showered and put on the exact same clothes I was wearing before I showered, laid back, laid back in my bed, answering emails and played video games. I was starting to wonder. I think I have like, neck rolls.

[A]

Every time you get on here, you look for a different problem. I have. You don't have neck rolls. You don't have neck rolls.

[B]

I think I have neck rolls.

[A]

Oh my God.

[B]

I think. Okay, this is what I'm thinking about. Getting Botox filler under my eyes and liposuction on this part of my face.

[A]

Oh my God. Roberta, can I help rehabilitate you back to civilization, to society?

[B]

If you want to. I mean, I'd appreciate that.

[A]

Would you do the same for me if I had any. If I had like, any surgery? Would you do the same for me

[B]

if you'd have a surgery? I don't think I would have the gust or the energy to come take care of you. I don't have what it takes. I don't have the emotional fortitude to do that. I would not. I would not do that.

[A]

Fortitude.

[B]

You have a partner named Andy who, Who can take care of all that stuff for you.

[A]

Today. Sibling advice. Rev, do we want to start giving people some advisory today?

[B]

Advisory?

[A]

Yeah. Bob, you want to see what I. No, I'll send it to you. Send Western me directly what I wore.

[B]

Are we doing super secret, super secret?

[A]

No, it's not out yet. And it's a whole thing.

[B]

What is it for? But why did you. Why did you bring up secrets in the podcast? Why do you do this?

[A]

Why do you make a big thing about the secrets I bring out? I'm like, oh, oh, here go Monet. They can always edit it out. But you like, oh, when I got a secret project.

[B]

Well, I think as a listener, it's annoying. This is very beautiful. I think you should post it on the page. I think you should post this on the Patreon. I think you should let them see a little sneak peek of this outfit.

[A]

I can't do that. I mean, I'll do it the week leading up to it, but it's not coming out for a little. A long time now.

[B]

I don't know. I thought this was. This is the pit stop. I don't know the fuck this is because you haven't told me. I don't know what the fuck I'm looking at.

[A]

I do.

[B]

I daily don't know what this is for. I'm not doing the thing. I literally, I'm just looking at an outfit. You standing in it, elevator or.

[C]

Or.

[B]

Or the corner of a Buffalo Wild Wings with this outfit on.

[D]

Can you describe the outfit for our listeners?

[B]

That is like a restaurant. It looks at the corner of a restaurant, don't it? When you. When you. Monet is standing. She is. Can I describe the outfit? Are you comfor me describing the outfit?

[A]

Oh, yeah, you can describe it.

[B]

Monet. Clearly, her biggest inspiration was Rose, obviously, with this silhouette. Rose would wear this down also. I'm assuming this is domino.

[A]

It is domino.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Round.

[A]

Round one.

[B]

It looks like a gun metal. It looks like sort of a gun metal. It's either like grayish brown and it's.

[A]

No, it's olive green.

[B]

I'm colorblind. So we're not gonna. We're not gonna. We're not gonna be ableist. And Monet is. It kind of has like a one division top to it. You know, the way one division hats look. That's how the titties look like the. The bus. And then there's like a skin section. There's like a leotard and there's like some leggings that have, like stirrups, but they're not actually attached to the leotard and their gloves attached to the bottom. It looks very Lovely. Very, very beautiful.

[A]

Thank you.

[D]

Alright, here is our first question.

[B]

Hey, Bob and Monet.

[C]

I recently got into a new poly relationship with a guy who started dating this girl a few weeks before me. It's her first poly relationship and she really seems to be struggling with jealousy and just constantly comparing the amount of

[B]

time he'll spend with me versus her. Her jealousy culminates in fights between the two of them and.

[C]

And I've never been the jealous type, but now it feels like I'm being

[B]

dragged into her emotions.

[C]

My boyfriend says she's trying to unlearn what society has taught her about monogamy.

[B]

But my question is, do you think you can clearly.

[A]

Oh, this is your wheelhouse, 1000%. So please.

[B]

Why do you think this is more directed at me? Why do you. What makes you think.

[A]

You are so silly?

[B]

I think that. Okay, so the thing. It sounds like you're in a relationship with someone who's in a relationship with someone else. So it sounds like you three aren't in like a thing together. It's not like you're in a relationship with someone and that person. Does that sound about right to you, Jacob? Okay, work. So what's happening is you can't work their relationship for them. You have to let them figure out what's going to go on in their relationship for them. And you really is really.

[A]

What's the difference? What do you mean? So you. So you. So you're saying the other person is. Because that, because that third party is not poly. So that. So you're. So. So what makes it poly? Because pretty much you're. If we liken it to you, you're in a relationship with Jacob and your relationship with Ezra, but they're like. So how does that differ what you have?

[B]

I think with ladies, I don't think it is different. I think what the lady saying that she's not suited for polyamory. Like, she's not. Like polyamory is not a. A sexuality. Polyamory is not a. It's not like you come out as. I mean, some people do come as probably, but I don't treat it like a. It is. I'm a person who believes in polyamory. But that does not mean that every, every relationship I have will always be polyamorous. Who knows? You know what I mean? But that being said, you can. It can't be your place to help this woman get through what she's trying to get through in life. Her and this man have to go through it alone. You know, I've Had a partner who's had relationships since I've been with Ezra, has had partners since I've been with him. And if they have issues or some sort of a. Whatever, they've broken up or going through a fight or whatever, I can be there for Ezra as a partner if he needs some support, but I'm not going to, like, try to fix their relationship for them or do that. I'm just going to just be able to be there to support my partner if he needs it. But. But I don't think it's your place to try to help this woman get through her polyamory. Can you become polyamory? I think people discover over time may be okay with polyamory. I. I think that everyone. I personally think everyone has the capacity to be okay with polyamory. Just like I think everyone has the capacity to. To be monogamous. Everyone has the capacity just about what you're willing to. To do. What do you think, Mom?

[A]

Did you have to.

[B]

We're.

[A]

So Ezra was obviously polyamorous, but did Jacob become. I mean, this is a question for Jacob. Would Jacob become polyamorous when he met you? Or was Jacob already Polly, like, did, like, into her point? Like, did this. Did Jacob learn to become poly, or was Jacob already Polly meeting you?

[D]

Well, Jake, I. I think it's a. A little bit of both. I. I mean, I think I'd only had monogamous relationships before Caldwell, which wasn't necessarily by choice. It's not like I went and sought. Sought them out. It was more that. Just like when I was in those relationships, I wasn't aware, you know, I just was only thinking that polyamory was an option because that's just what I learned. And I. It literally just had not occurred to me. And then when Caldwell and I met and we were, like, starting. We were also, like, both hooking up with a lot of other people when getting around a lot.

[B]

Oh, my God. Jesus Christ.

[D]

When we had the conversation that we would be boyfriends, I think we just sort of were like, okay, we're gonna keep doing what we've been doing and hooking up with who we've been hooking up with, because that. What. That's what feels good and natural.

[B]

Jacob will never. Jacob will never cop to it. Whenever I mentioned, he's like, that's not really what happened. But Jacob did kind of for a short while, date this other guy. It wasn't successful and they didn't flourish, but Jacob did have a short, Short. A short courtship with. With one other Guy while we're dating

[D]

Work. Who?

[B]

That guy that. That you were hanging.

[C]

I don't.

[B]

I don't remember his name. You, like, met at a bar or something, or you would. You met out at the bar one time or something? That one guy. Jacob.

[D]

I think I know who you're talking about.

[B]

I don't remember his name.

[D]

Yeah, I know you're talking about. I don't consider that dating. I had a brief. I had a brief and passing fancy for a gentleman who did not return the feelings.

[B]

Not a brief in passing. It was fancy. You are wild.

[A]

Oh, my God. Not Jacobin as from the 1920s work.

[B]

Well, he was very ridiculous to not return that to you because you're so beautiful, so loving, and you're a wonderful partner and anyone would be lucky to have you. Jacob,

[A]

my opinions to this person. I mean, again, I'm not in polyam. I'm not polyamorous. I'm not involved in a polyamorous relationship. But I think it is. It is. If you. This person will have to change their conditioning, their social conditioning to think about how this. This third piece, the gentleman. Is it a gentleman that they're. Both these people are dating?

[B]

No, it's this woman dating a guy, and then the guy's dating a girl. So it's two girls dating one guy.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So it'd be like if Jacob and Andrew were. Then I'd be the guy. Ye.

[A]

Right. So, yeah. So I guess this guy clearly is into polyamory. So if you want to still get and be in a relationship with this guy, the third woman, then she has to learn to believe in polyamorals. It will never work because they just don't see relationships the same way. So I think she has to. I'm sure you can. Yes, you can. Yeah. You can learn anything. But is.

[B]

Is it.

[A]

Does she want to learn polyamory and that's the difference as opposed to can she though? Does she want to?

[B]

I agree.

[A]

All right, next one.

[B]

Oh, you guess.

[A]

I want to be no bitch. You're delayed. So Jacob and I are talking and you are answering 10 minutes later.

[B]

Well, I'm on hotel wi fi and we all know this. Everyone knows I'm on hotel wi fi. This is not a secret.

[A]

Yeah, on hotel wi fi. Losing hotel lotion,

[B]

actually.

[D]

Hi, my name is Martina. I just want to say I love the both of you. But my question is, have you ever been to a place that is haunted? Did you know was haunted before you went? Did you feel anything or it was just a normal day or have you ever been to a place that you just happen to feel like there was something there, but no one said it was haunted, but you knew that something was going on? I just wanted to know your intake. I look forward to your answers. Thanks.

[A]

Okay. I have never. I though I do believe in ghosts. I think ghosts are real. I think spirits and energy. I think that's a real thing. I. I have never felt a spiritual in it, like. Like a ghost. I've never felt anything paranormal like that. So I sound dumb believing in something that I have literally never felt and never experienced. But that doesn't change the fact that I think that it's something that does exist. But have I personally been to somewhere haunted and felt a thing touch my shoulder, like Thor Jordan? No, I've never felt that.

[B]

When you say you believe in gothic. Well, like, what do you mean? Like, you think when you die, what do you think happens next?

[A]

I think that I've never asked you that.

[B]

What happens when. I've never actually. That what happens when you die? I've never asked you this question.

[A]

Yes, we have. On our whole episode of our whole episode, on the one about spirituality, you actually absolutely did. And then I said, I. I said, I don't know because. Well, I said. I said was one thing. I don't remember what it was. I was like. Then you. Then you said. Went on your whole Bob tangent about Monet. You think actually when you die, like Monet, you actually think that did the whole Bob thing? I was like, bob, I don't know. So I. I dance says I don't know, but I feel like some people do have unfinished business and their energies and their spirit lingers in the world.

[B]

But the way you said it makes

[A]

me feel like you don't believe it

[B]

because you said it so, like, you're like in their essences. Like, you turn into my angelou. At the. At the explanation. You know, I'm the opposite of Monet. I have experienced some paranormal things and I don't believe in it at all. I believe it was just like a mind trick or my mind playing tricks on me at the time, because I do not believe in it at all. And I. I once said, what was it? I've had a few things happen to me, girl. I mean, I told you that I predicted my grandma's death. I ever tell you that?

[A]

In your dreams, right?

[B]

Well, it felt if. Yeah, it felt like a dream or was something. I don't know what it was, but, like, it just felt. I saw this angel, this, like, white blonde man who, by the way, he looked just like the angel from my movies that I watched. I'm like, when my mind created this, and he was like, don't go to Mississippi this summer. Your grandma's gonna die. And then he just disappeared. And then I screamed, and then my mom came down, and then my grandma died. And then I also. When I was, like, 19, I was working as a traveling actor. I was in this place, and I had this. I had probably the most intense sleep paralysis I've ever had in my life. Like, it was. It was the scariest bout of sleep paralysis. I've had a lot of sleep paralysis in my life. And I was laying in my bed, and then I opened my eyes, and I could just see his place plain as day. Like, the window across me, like, blew open. And this, like, it looked like Blair Witch Project or the Ring. Like, a woman was just like, you know, but she was in a wedding dress and she was, like, just floating toward me. And I couldn't do any. I couldn't do anything to stop this woman from coming at me. I would just scream. I was trying to scream, but I couldn't scream. And then finally, I, like, went to sleep or woke up or something, and she was gone. And I remember being like, I am mortified. Like, I was terrified. So I've had a few things like that happen to me in my life, but I just think that it's just. I have a very active imagination.

[A]

Yeah, you do. And sometimes a little delusional.

[B]

Yeah, man. I had a whole delusion that a ghost came in my room, was. It was trying to cut out my wigs.

[A]

Shall we go for the next one, Roberto?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

That's all of our audio files.

[B]

Wow. All right, Well, y', all, since. Since Monet's in a rush, we better get through this, because apparently, Monet, I'm

[A]

not in a rush. Oh, my God.

[B]

When I got somewhere to be, y', all, it's gonna be a 13 minute episode also. Oh, my God.

[A]

Okay, so this first question. Oh, I want to do a cereal at some point.

[B]

Yeah, we should see at some point. Anyway. Dear Bob and Monet, I was in a car.

[A]

This first one. Wait, hold on. This first one. Jacob sent it to our group chat first, and I was like. But he said I was in a car crash three months ago. I was like, oh, God, what is Jacob about to release in this group chat?

[B]

Bitch, I was in a car crash three months ago.

[A]

Yeah, you were.

[B]

Dear Bob, Monet, I was in a car crash three months ago, and I Sustained a spinal injury which limited my mobility for a while. I have ptsd, so it truly took a toll on my physical and mental health. I'm healing now, and your show is part of that. During this time, I went. I went through a devastating breakup. He was a dick. Poetry has been my way of processing past and recent trauma. I wrote a poem about this chapter of my life, and, baby, it. Wait, maybe I lit his ass up in that poem. It may break him if I'm honest. He's somewhat part of my life again, and I want to send it to him, but is it weird? I feel guilty. I've accepted him. I accepted he isn't for me. But we were. We are twin flames. I will form sl. Share this piece when I feel. When I'm fully healed. But should I send it to him? Sincerely, Maya Angel. You want to go first, Mary?

[A]

Yeah,

[B]

I.

[A]

What does. What does word twin flames mean? Like. Like they're. Like they're the same flame. Like, they will always.

[B]

I think it mean. Means, like. Yeah, like, they'll always be each other. I think it means, like, they'll always be in each other's lives, I think. Let me see. Twin flames. Twin flames. Definition. Twin flames is two people who are split into different bodies but share the same soul.

[A]

Got it, got it, got it. Okay. I don't think you owe it to this person to send it to him. Sure, you can send it to him, but, I mean. Okay, here are the things. The only reason why you won't send it to him before you read it in public is because you want him to gag, right? If you don't care if he's. If you're just sending it to him, why do you care? Like, if your intention is not to make him gag and to, like, be and to surprise him, then you can send it to him because, like, who cares? Like, he reads it before one person gets to hear before tens, twenties or thousands, whatever it is. So the only reason to not send it to him is because you're trying to get a little dig in and you're trying to gag him.

[B]

I feel. It seems to me, like the only reason you would send it to him would be to. Well, there's two reasons you could send it to him, I imagine. Either because you. Yeah, you want to gag him, and you. And you kind of want to hurt him and you want to get some redemption for how you feel, or you would like to soften the blow for when you do finally perform this piece out in public. I think that if you are feeling that way, I would say whenever you do decide to sit, perform it, you can send it to him. Then if you want him to be mentally prepared for this verbal lashing, this tongue lashing he's gonna get. But if you're just sitting to him because you want to know how you

[A]

feel,

[B]

of course you're allowed to do that, but it might be a little unnecessary.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I agree. I agree. But listen, if he was cunty to you and he made you feel really bad about yourself, bitch, gag that motherfucker, invite him to the show and do that poem and just. And set on stage and, and sit in that power of knowing that you got that period.

[B]

That sounds like bad advice, especially for someone who you, who you're saying is still your friend. And, and also if you're twin flames bitch, he probably wrote a poem about you. He probably telling his friends you was a dick. If you all share the same spirit, two different bodies, he's probably like, my angel who was a dick, she was fucking a nasty, nasty bitch to me. And I, and I wrote a poem. I'm about to gag this bitch. So I think that you should, you should offer him what you would like done to you. That's what I think.

[A]

I mean, that's fair advice. But if you want to be a little messy and petty, I say just surprise him.

[B]

But money, that's not even you. You're not even that kind of girl. And you giving this advice, the advice you wouldn't even take.

[A]

No, that's not true. Depending on bitch. I've written songs about ex boyfriends, and then they messaged. Then they messaged me, like, wow.

[B]

Yeah, but you're also one of the least confrontational people that I know. Like, you, you. You're not the one to be like. I, I wrote the poem, invited song, invited him to the show, put him in the front row and was like, wouldn't you be me if I was there for you? Make me think that you there for you. Only you, you, you. Only you. Robert. You, nigga. You Robert, Robert. Only you, you, you. Like, I don't think you're. I don't think you're about that life. Monet or whatever his name was.

[A]

I, I, I would, I would. Girl, I would.

[B]

Living in your mama house. Why you a hairdresser from San Diego? Oh, my God. It's too much. It's too much. It's too much. It's too. Oh, but you bought that life. I thought you about that life. I would try to just promote you to be about that Life.

[A]

You are so messy. You are so messy. I cannot. I cannot. Anyway, that was it. This is now. This is this. I'm in a whole new space and you are. Oh, my God.

[B]

I thought you were that. I thought you was that. I thought you was that. I thought you was there. I thought you was Back then.

[A]

Back then when I. Back then when, like, most emotions were still high. That was so long ago.

[C]

That was like, what?

[A]

Three, two years? Three years ago at this point.

[B]

I thought you were some messy pictures.

[A]

You are so messy. Oh, my God, you are so messy. Let me read the next one. Dear Bob and Monet, I've been hooking up with this guy around once or twice a month for about six months. The sex is always good, but I just don't like his personality. We have nothing in common. Very different interests and kinds of humor. He keeps on wanting to hang out, but I'm more interested in keeping it strictly sexual. How do I tell him I'm not really interested in being friends with him? Sincerely, hit and run that band aid life.

[B]

You want to get this out as soon as possible. You do not want to. Do not string someone along emotionally. It is so mean. It is so hurtful. It is so unnecessary. Do not play with this person's feelings. You play with their emotions. If you're not into them, you should say very upfront, hey, I'm looking for this to be just a friends with benefits thing. Like, just the benefits part. Like, I not looking to date you. I think you're very sexy. I love having sex with you. I love this component of our relationship. But I'm not looking for anything more than this, maybe not even friendship. And I just want to be open and honest with you. You can find a nice way to say it, but you don't have to. Don't. You know you can say something. I'm. I'm like. You can say right now for you, I am emotionally available for sex, but I'm not emotional. But I'm not available for like, dating. And that's where I'm at with you.

[A]

Yeah, I. I think that's sound advice. I think if you, if you. That you may be someone who, who struggles being a little like a little bit that blunt, a little honest, which you can't say. The next time he asks you, he like, hey, what you doing tomorrow? You can just be like, yeah, well, I'm going out on a date with X, Y, Z. So that he knows that you are pursuing relationships or going on dates with other people. And I think that after like, once or twice. He'll get the hint. But keep on. You can keep on having sex with him, but if you don't want to, like, say to him because you feel like it'll hurt your feelings, or you feel like being that honest will make him not want to have sex with you anymore, you love that. You love having sex with this person. I say, just be, like, when. When he asks you, just, yeah, I'm going on a date with Fred, or I'm going. I'm going on a date with this guy that I've been seeing or stuff like that, so that he gets the hint that you're clearly dating people but not him.

[B]

I mean, if you're actually going on a date, if you're not, that's just lying. I have a strong belief that in order for a lie to live, you have to prop it up with more lies. Like you. That is. The only way that a lie can be sustained is with more lies. You cannot sustain a lie with the truth. It doesn't work that way. So I. That's what I'm saying. Like, it's kind of like whenever. Whenever someone's like, I'm kind of looking to date right now. Like, if it's me, say it's me. Don't say you're not looking to date. Say, I don't want to date you. That helps me a lot that. That gives me. Because when you see you're not gonna date.

[A]

That is true.

[B]

And then I see your ass turn around dating somebody else. Oh, we fighting. Fighting, not fighting. I'm being a little facetious, but I'm. But I will be hurt. I feel. What I mean is my feelings will be hurt. So I think that you have to lean into the truth, and you have to, at some point just say, hey, I am very sexually attracted to you, but I don't feel a. A. A romantic connection outside of sex. And I would like to maintain our sexual relationship if that. If. If you consent to that. If you are fine being, like, just buddies with me, that would be great, because that's what. That. That is what I want. And I really. And also let him know how much you value that. Like, I. And I really love this. Like this. I give this a lot of value because it feels good to me. It fulfills the need in my life, and I'm so happy to have this in my life right now. And if you're willing to.

[A]

Or it literally fills me.

[B]

Am I right, ladies? And if you're willing to continue on this with me, then I would like. I would like to. I would like to see it.

[A]

Yeah, that works too. But I mean, if you ain't afraid of a little white lie, I'll say. To say, I'm going to date with someone tomorrow.

[B]

Little white knives are. I cannot disrecommend that. That enough. Like, white. White lines are tough. Like, you have to keep lying because you say you're on a date with Freddie. Then. Then he sees Freddie like, how's your date? And Fred's like, I ain't dating her. We are not dating. I have never gone on a date with this thing in my life. We have never done anything together. Damn. Now you called. Now Freddie's like, why you lying? Why'd you tell somebody I was on a date with you?

[A]

You know, and yeah, you're right. You're right. Today I'm giving messy advice. I am. I'm giving sibling mastery today, girl.

[B]

Mone's like, if I have to, your show embarrass the fuck out of him.

[C]

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[B]

Dear Bob Monet, since the lockdown started, I have been using my phone more and more to the point where I feel like I'm now addicted to it. How do I pull myself away from all that joyful content of yours and so many others? Sincerely, Player one. Ooh, girl.

[A]

I know For Apple, they make an app you can download on your phone where after a certain amount of hours that you. That you use your phone, it will literally lock your phone with a code that you don't know so that you cannot lose. So you cannot use your phone until that. Until like that. The time that you set up, but I think. But also they have, like, clearances that you can like. Like, let's say I could like, send Bob, like, what the code is. Like, let's say I really needed to. Like, I think you can use things like phone calls and et cetera, but for apps, it won't open any apps. You can only, like, dial. Dial numbers or so stuff like that for a certain amount of time. And some people, that's like, it seems harsh, but some people really need that to, like, break yourself in the habit of using your phone when you just idly sitting.

[B]

I mean, I guess part of me is like, why does it matter? You just like, if. Unless you have something else you need to be doing at that time. Like, if you have something else that you actually need to be doing that time, then yeah. But if you, if your phone is. I want those books. Like, if your phone is bringing you joy, it's not hurting you. It's helping you connect to people. You can learn things from this. You can socialize with other people. You can watch TV shows and then your friends get together, talk about how much you all love Yellowjacket or Euphoria or we're here available on HBO Max, Right? But, like, you should. I don't see. I don't understand the war on phones. Like, some people just be out here, like, get off your phones. I'm like, but if it is hindering your life, if it is, like, messing up your relationship with people, if you're not getting work done, then I would recommend using one of the auto locks. There are functions that will turn your phone off. There are boxes you can put your phone in. You can delete the apps. You can do what you got to do. Otherwise, I think phones are great. It's a great way to connect to people around you.

[A]

In my experiences, people who are addicted to their phones are. Are doing it at a hindrance to themselves because it's slowing productivity. I think most people who want to kick the habit of always being on their phone is because they're not getting other things done because they're constantly checking Instagram or Facebook or TikTok mindlessly. That's why TikTok just had that, had that, had that dude come and be like, hey, you've been scrolling for an hour. Shouldn't you get him back to work? What's happened to me?

[B]

I blocked him immediately. I was like, mind your fucking business.

[A]

I like you. You're right. I need, really need to get, get, like, get to work. Like, for real. I should Skip the off. Tick tock. I've that. I've been that girl for sure.

[B]

I was like, you need. I was like, shouldn't you be minding your own goddamn business, sir? Talking about some. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Drink some water. You drink some water. Telling me to drink water.

[A]

Shall I read the next one, Bob?

[B]

Let's do it, Mary.

[A]

Hold on. Did I. Oh, no. It's my turn.

[B]

Yes, it is.

[A]

Yeah. Dear Bob and Monet, I'm a drag queen and my apartment is overflowing with costumes, wigs and heels. Girl, Preach. How do I store it and organize everything in my tiny one bedroom apartment? When you were slumming it, did you have any space that wasn't a drag explosion? Sincerely, drag hoarders.

[B]

No, not a slum. Not a slum. Not a slum. Not when y' all were slumming it.

[C]

When you.

[B]

When you were living like when you were living in pig shit, you know, I really sacrificed my entire home for drag. I turned my entire living room into a drag closet and mood myself into my bedroom. And then I put my drag in my closet in the bedroom and then I had like half a closet for. For Caldwell out of drag because of limited space and how much it meant to me. So I may not be a great person to ask because I fully sacrificed my home and I had. And I had a two bedroom and I still sacrificed my home to fucking, you know, live in. In the midst of all my drag.

[A]

Yeah, when I had a studio, I was pretty good about like making like, but kind of. Because in my. Because in my. In my. I was in a studio apartment in the Bronx. Well, it was like a one bedroom studio because the kitchen and the bathroom was separate, but the bedroom, living room was all one thing. So in my dining room kitchen, I had like my wigs on the wall, but. And I was pretty able to keep them separate. When I had my two bedroom apartment in Harlem, I made. I just devoted one entire bedroom to drag stuff only. And I had a storage unit, so I was paying. A storage unit, so I just wouldn't have to have all my drag everywhere. And here in my house now I have a three bedroom. I have two whole bedrooms dedicated to drag. And now I also have another storage room because drag people who are in drag queens don't understand. It just multiplies and it multiplies. And when you see shoes, exhibit A. Even though obviously I don't wear all these shoes, I buy them. Because in drag you never know. I'll need to get a costume made next week. And I'm happy I got those sparkly pink shoes because I can wear it. You know what I mean? So. And like, with costumes, you get like a fucking Freddy Krueger costume made one year or maybe that's. That's probably something you lose a lot. But you get a pink waitress costume made and you wear it twice, you're

[B]

like, oh, I don't.

[A]

I'm going to throw this way. I never need it. And then cut to literally the next day, someone is like, hey, we want to have pink waitresses at the party. You're like, fuck. So, like, that's why drag queens never throw shit away, because you never know what the fuck you're going to need when you. When you'll need it. And so my advice to you is I would say get a storage unit. A storage unit is a good place to start. And depending on where you live, it may be easy. It may be cheaper to get one further away from where you live, because if you live, like, let's say, in Hell's Kitchen or something, getting a storage unit in that area is super expensive. But if you get one in the Bronx or something else, maybe a little cheaper. So I would say get a storage unit and start there if you really not want to have your two worlds converging that much.

[B]

Yeah, my search unit is in the Valley, so I'm like, girl, I have and I live in Hollywood, so I'm like, my surgeon is nowhere near me, but it is a lot cheaper. And I'm able to. Also something I've been trying to get Monet to do, and now this has never successfully worked out with me. But you can also team up with another drag queen or two or three or four, however many you need, and get a common space where you all can store your stuff together. I am trying to get Moan. I've been trying to get Monet to go in with me on, like, some sort of a mega studio space where we can, like, have. Imagine if we each have.

[A]

And I've literally said. I said I would do it. You're acting like I'm, like, against it. I don't know what this. What the story you're trying to.

[B]

I never thought I would not want an attack on you. Wow, Marin, this is not an attack.

[A]

You started it as an attack. You're literally like. You literally, like, well, I've been trying to get Monet to do this, and she literally would not budge. She doesn't want to do it literally

[B]

how you started it. I. That's. That's.

[A]

Do you know what literally means?

[B]

You know how that word works?

[A]

Anyway, almost literally.

[B]

Anyway, like I was saying, I, I try to get Mon to go in with me on this, on this space, but she literally said no. And that way you can, like, you know, split the cost. And maybe if your drag is paying for itself, then this would be a good way to let it give you back some of your life, you know what I mean?

[A]

But also, I'll watch the queens you share space with. I would share a space with Bob. I would not. There's not many people I would share space with because I know Bob wouldn't like, take my things out, my permission, et cetera. But if you share a space with some bitches, you know, some bitches be like, oh, she won't mind. And then you go to the gig at 3 Scooby Bubbity Bar and she got your, your catsuit on. You're like, what the. So be careful who you.

[B]

Not just. If it's still your stuff. Does this drag queen smell? Are. Do you. Are you gonna walk and it's gonna smell like nasty dirty ass tights? Is she, does she make the money to be able to afford to pay her part of the, of the rent for y'? All? Like, like, is she messy? Is her stuff about to send you

[A]

to small claims court?

[B]

Is her stuff going to start spilling into your space? That kind of stuff. Like, there's a lot of things you look out with. So, like when I said the only person I've ever considered doing this with is macaroni exchange, you know, what is the one thing you regret not doing in your early 20s? I'm struggling big time trying to figure out this adulting bs. I'm tired. Adore you both and silly baby gay. I'm going to say right now. Listen to me and listen to me carefully. If you are under 25, start a Roth IRA. I'm gonna say it again. If you're under 25, start a Roth IRA. I think the anti capitalist movement has a lot of great gestures in it, but it's not realistic. And this, this like anti capitalist thing that we're all pushing for is actually keeping a lot of people broke. In my opinion, it is pushing something that will not happen. We are part of a capitalist society. Get on board. I mean, that's, that's what. That's genuinely, I feel, learn about finances and get on board because that is the system that you live in for realties, for realsies. And I think that becoming financially literate is very smart.

[A]

I feel so that was, that was what I was gonna say. Yeah.

[B]

I feel so far behind. Start your Roth ira, go down to Goldman Sachs, go down to Chase, Go down to somewhere and say, how do I do this? And there is someone there itching at the opportunity to help you with it.

[A]

Yeah, I agree. Financial literacy is key. Like, like, like, because I think the older I've gotten, obviously, I'm just more. I'm just. I'm just more averse to trying to read up about it. And. And I just. I just don't have the gumption to want to do it. But when I was younger, I, I was. I was into that, but I. But I was too busy. Well, maybe you're too busy too, but the fact that you're younger. Try your best to become financially literate. Please, please, please. Because the more you know younger, the better you can protect yourself later. So, yeah, I say financial literacy is fucking key, bitch. Learn, learn. Learn about your finances. Because like Bob said, yes, we live in a capitalist society and we're trying to change that. And no, I don't want the man. But bitch, the fact is you need to.

[C]

You.

[A]

You need to fucking work the man so you can get your shit together. Like, you just cannot. We just don't live in a world where you. Where. Where you don't need money. That's just not where we're at. And we're. Maybe we'll be one day, but for this lifetime, bitch, is not gonna happen. So become financially illiterate, because that's the only way to be free.

[B]

I don't think it's the only way to be free. I don't think that money will actually free. Completely free you. But I guess that's a whole nother conversation.

[A]

Money, I mean, I mean, this is definitely a rivalry conversation, but money is

[B]

definitely way to be freedom. Tell me more about not the only way.

[A]

You're right. Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, Bob. Not the only way. Yes, sure. Not. It's not the only way. But money is a big way to be free and to be liberated and to do things that you want to do. Like, that is. Money is the root of that. Because no matter. Unless you live in the woods like Pearl, you have to pay bills, you have to pay rent, you have to. You need money to survive.

[B]

I don't. I don't believe what you're saying. I think that. Actually, I think that the more that you become involved in money, the more you become enslaved to it. Like, the more money you make, the more money you are spending, the more you start building your life around you, the more you need it.

[A]

It's not about making a lot of money. I'm not saying making a lot of money. That's not what I'm saying.

[B]

What I'm saying is I don't think a lot. The more money you make, the more money you need. So like, as you start to like, it's like, for example, if you open a Roth ira, you have to put an amount into it every single year. Every year you absolutely have to put something into it. So now you are beholden to try to figure that out, how to make the money to put into the Roth ira. And then you have little stuff like if you buy a house, you have a mortgage, you are now beholden. So everyone's like, oh, the key is own land. And now you're free. No, you're not. Because you owe money to the bank every month to keep your house and to keep your car and to put your Roth ira. And now you have children. So I actually don't think that making money is just becoming freedom, but becoming

[A]

financially literate, you arm yourself with that knowledge. So you know, hey, I don't want to be tied onto a 30 year fixed mortgage. I don't want to have a home, a home for 30 years. I want my nice 800 studio apartment in Ohio. I know how much money. Like I'm saying, I'm not saying that, that to. You're saying get a Roth ira. Yes, that stuff is important, sure. But if you know that you don't want that, you don't want to have, be enslaved to have to make $5,000 a year or whatever, you know that I'm content with doing this, this, this XYZ and making this, this X amount of money and what I have to pay in taxes to sustain that. I think that that to me, that has become a financially literate so that you can sustain and have the life that you want to have and not feel like you are a slave to the machine. And I don't figure out whatever that is to make that money.

[B]

And I'm not saying that you shouldn't open our authority or own a home. I'm just saying I don't think that's the path to freedom. I think freedom is feeling free, feeling like you have nothing to burden you, nothing to bring you down. To quote Kris Kristofferson, freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose. Like that's when you're free. I think if you really want to be free, bitch, go live off the land. That's Freedom.

[A]

That's really an esoteric way. Sure.

[B]

I don't.

[A]

Freedom is. But, but, but, but it's not. But it's not. It's sure you can if you want to be a flippy dippy lippy, living off the land and, and, and, and cultivating the corn and what. And, and like, do your living. Live in a, live in a commune in, in Williamsburg, which is not possible because Williamsburg ain't. Ain't a, you know, commune friendly.

[B]

I.

[A]

What you what? You over there, clickety clacking. You over there looking at something.

[B]

Look.

[A]

Look at your face all scrounged up, looking rude and nasty.

[B]

I'm not. I'm just looking up stuff so I can contribute to this conversation is all. I'm looking up at how possible it is to like, free yourself from. I, I don't think it is impossible to. To free yourself. I think it's actually probably easier to free yourself from financial obligations than it is to keep yourself in them. I just know that I know which one.

[C]

I.

[A]

But you're living a certain lifestyle.

[B]

Yeah, that's the same as making money. They're both a certain lifestyle. And I. It's probably harder to maintain a lifestyle where you have to keep up with a house and a car and a bibbity bop than it is just get a. Fill up a backpack and pay your minimal taxes and, and walk around.

[A]

Right. If you want that. Well, nine times out of ten, you're not gonna meet a person who wants that. I think. I think you meet more people who want to have the things that they want to have, but not feel that they are slate the machine to keep it. So being financially free, you figure out, oh, if I want this iPhone and this thing, maybe the best thing for me is not to buy one where I have to pay the monthly thing to Apple, because then. So then you work and you save the money, et cetera, so you can buy things outright or whatever makes sense to you as a person. That's my point. My point is becoming financially free to me is figuring out how to, how to sustain. Sustain and lead the life that you want and that in a way that you don't feel enslaved to the machine to me, that. That is what freedom is to me.

[B]

Yeah, I guess we have to agree to disagree on this one because I, I don't think of like, for example, I make more money now than I did before, but I don't feel more financially free now. I feel actually way more financially obligated now than I ever have in my life. Having Multiple employees, having. I feel more financially obligated now than I did when I was 22. I had. I had no financial obligations besides eating and my cell phone bill and some and. And like a third of rent because I live with other people. Bitch. I was so free back then.

[A]

The only time I felt. The only other time in my life that I felt as free as I do not was when I was a child living at home not. And didn't have any bills and didn't work. That's when I. I truly had no care in the world what the fuck I want, ask my mom for money and do my business. But now I, you know, I am making more money than I was in my twenties and I feel. And now that I'm making an income to sustain what I want and what I have shorter obligations I have to do, like this fucking podcast. But outside of that, you know, I feel like I'm doing all the things I'm doing I like doing. Are there certain things that come. I'm like, I have to do this thing? Sure. But for the most part, the majority of things in my life, like sipping rivalry, like doing the Pit Stop, et cetera, things like that, I. I enjoy doing it. So I don't feel like I'm a slave to anything because I'm choosing to do things that I want to do that I don't know.

[B]

We all know they don't nobody be pissed off for the money. I'm not trying to. I'm not trying to blow Viacoms exactly. Right now. Exactly. Don't know. I was not for the money, girl.

[A]

I wasn't saying for the money exactly. I'm not doing for the money. I'm doing because I enjoy doing it. But. And, and it. I don't feel an enslaved man. So I'm like, ugh, I have to fucking go to the Pit stop. I am at a place in my life where I can do things like. And still be able to sustain the lifestyle that I have. And to me, that feels the brain.

[B]

You act like you didn't get to have fun. You act like you didn't get. You didn't get to do nothing. Your twin, you was loving doing. You had like, everything you did. Your 20 was, was, was a slog to pay the man.

[A]

I mean, good going to The Yale Club 40 hours a week. End up sometimes working 60 hours in overtime. Like 20.

[B]

Yes. I hated that. I fucking hate.

[A]

I did not like that. You know how it is being a drag queen. You and I, we work six days a week. There are some bar nights you like, girl, let me go do this fucking gig. You don't want to leave it. I, I know what that felt like.

[B]

I. Sometimes I do gigs. I do gigs today I don't want to do. That has not changed. I do gigs to this day. I'd be like, but not. And I've seen. Do it too. And I've seen you.

[A]

I did say that. But, but, but we still have the luxury of picking and choosing. Some girls, they have to do every gig that comes in to sustain. You and I, we both know we had the luxury of saying no to things like, bitch, I'm not doing that gig. Fuck out of here. Some people don't have that luxury. So. So again, to me, that's part of the freedom I feel because I get to pick and choose things that I want to do. And yes, sometimes I pick it and I'm still like, ugh. But you know, I still have. I still have the, the. I can make that choice.

[B]

The last thing I'll say is this to Monet, bitch, you have never been broke. You have never in your life once been broke.

[A]

You don't know that. That's not true. Yes, I.

[B]

Bob, when were you broke?

[A]

Right when I moved to my first apartment in the Bronx by myself, I absolutely was broke. I had to pay. In New York City, I had to pay three months in advance, plus security, plus last month rent for the first, what, three or four months of my. And that's when I was listening to you just doing drag only so I didn't have the Yale Club to fall back on. I was like, bitch, if I lose one gig, I am literally eating ramen noodles all week. And also in college, in college, my parents did not pay for my college money.

[B]

You were Axel Weber broke, bitch. You had a house a 40 minute train stop away. If your whole Bronx. If your whole Bronx building would have burned down with everything in it before the sun went down, you would have been in Brooklyn sleeping. But you weren't broken. You were not struggling.

[A]

Just because, Bob, just because people in my life have money to. If I, If I fell down on hard times, I couldn't wanna say that.

[B]

That is bitch.

[A]

My pockets, my, My pockets were broke. That does not mean. That is not my house. That's my. That is my mother's house.

[B]

If.

[A]

Bitch, if I don't have money, I'm still broke. I still have to run home and be like, can I have some money for food? That doesn't mean just because. Just because people who love and support you have money doesn't mean that you are not broke if you don't have money in your pocket. Like, what. That is. That is the craziest thing you've ever said.

[B]

It's not crazy. And I can say. I can say that this is true. That is truly spoken like someone who has never not had an option. That is spoken like someone who has always had an option to not be broke. That is some shit you say when you're. When you.

[A]

When you're, like, you're conflating two ideas. You can play the same thing.

[B]

Just because that is truly spoken like someone who's, like. Who's always had a net to fall into. Just because you are never had it sane. And also, they're not ever had a net. They're not like all the folks who would never have. Who would like, there was no option. There was nothing else you could have done. I'm telling you, Monet, because I've been in both situations.

[A]

Just because you don't have a net to fall on, just because you don't have a net to fall back, just because you're someone.

[B]

Those.

[A]

Those are two different experiences. Just because you are someone who, you

[B]

know, you never had.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

How would you know? You never expected.

[A]

How would you know?

[B]

How the would you know? Money. Okay, first of all, everyone in my life hasn't always been poor. I've had nets in my life, and I've not had nets. You've never. Not that I had a net. So how would you know what it's like on the other side?

[A]

That is not true, Bob. You have no idea. You have no idea. You are literally assuming.

[B]

Okay, so when was the time in your life where you had nothing? When was the time in your life where you were where you would have. But this is all based on what you thought in my head.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Just because. Just. Okay.

[A]

Just because my family has a house in Brooklyn doesn't mean I can be

[B]

like, hey, like, if. If.

[A]

If my whole world felt fell apart, sure, I could. I could go back home and move him back home. But it has nothing to do with my personal experience with money and my finances and me not having money to buy food or to. Or to get groceries or to put gas in my car. That does not mean that I'm not broke. I am broke,

[B]

girl. What's this next question? Let me go to this.

[A]

You are insane.

[B]

You are insane. Let me go to this next question. You are wild. What is. How do you tell someone their sex is trash like Carrie and the Rabbit sex.

[A]

What does that mean?

[B]

Oh, that. Sex and City. Oh, Monet gets it. But, like, you fake orgasm bad. Sincerely faking it.

[A]

Oh, girl. I mean, that is hard. I mean, also. But if the sex is bad, you just don't go back. Like, if you, if this person has bad sex. I mean, not unless you want to pursue relationship with this person and you're trying to pursue a relationship with someone who has bad sex, that does not seem like you will have longevity in this relationship. It doesn't seem like you'll be happy in this relationship. So to me, it's pretty clear that your only option is to be like, hey, I'm not interested in having sex anymore. This is fun. Let's be friends. I think that that's where that goes. You're not obligated, you're not betrothed, you're not enslaved to this person to keep on having sex with them.

[B]

Well, I. I actually think that you can. I don't think that it is a bad idea to pursue a relationship with someone that you don't have good sex with if your connection and your bond is that strong, if you really value their friendship, but you have not given us any indication that you, that you feel that way. Also, you don't have to tell someone their sex is trash. You don't have to say it. You can just stop having sex. You don't have to insult them on the way out the door. You don't have to. You don't have to, like, drop a bomb on their world. Be like, we're done. And by the way, your sex is horrible. You can just be about your business and part ways peacefully. In my opinion, you don't have to, like, shut them down and hurt.

[A]

I don't think, I don't think you have to give them an exit letter when you leave. I didn't say that. But I'm like, you do not have to keep on having sex with this person. You can just be like, hey, this is fun. I'm not interested in having sex anymore and move on, girl, and find the next one.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, it's probably good to establish that. I mean, I also found that a lot of times in life, depending on how, what your situation is with someone, you can stop having sex with someone without announcing it. You don't have to announce it. You can just stop having sex with someone like it. There have been several times in my life where I've stopped hooked up with someone, but we didn't, like, go through a formal hey. I mean, there are Also times in my life when me and someone did sit down and say, hey, we're not doing this anymore. But sometimes it's just like you just kind of evolve into not hooked up, hooking up. But then they'll get. They'll get the idea. Or you can just say out loud, but if you do want to be their friend, or you. If you do want to pursue a relationship with them, you can be in a relationship with someone that you don't have great sex with if the bond is strong enough, and if you feel like their. Their love or their attention is something that you really like in your life.

[A]

I guess if you guys are monogamous, that seems like a really hard thing to do. I know for me, if I was monogamous with someone and the sex was really bad, I don't think see how that could work. But that's me, because sex, I think, is a big part of relationship, but everyone doesn't feel that way. Some people, sex is a really small part, a really small component, and they don't really care about it. But you're writing a letter to sitting rivalry. So I assume that you care a lot about sex and you want to know how you can make it better or you. Or what to do. So I would say, sure, if sex is not important to you and it's whatever, then have a relationship with this person. But if sex is an important part for you and the sex is bad and you guys are going to be monogamous in a relationship, to me, that seems like a bad mix, and I would not pursue that.

[B]

Well, I mean, I'm. I. I didn't assume that these folks were. That these folks were monogamous. It doesn't even sound like you're even dating this. It doesn't sound like you're dating this person. She didn't say, like, this person is saying my partner. They just said the sex is.

[A]

You added a dating to it.

[B]

No, you, you, you did. You said monogamy. No, you said it was based on.

[D]

You.

[B]

You were like, I don't.

[C]

You.

[B]

The first thing you said was, I don't know how you can unless you're pursuing a relationship with this person. I think you can pursue a relationship. So you said that. I said, I think you actually can pursue a relationship. And I think, well, you double down.

[A]

You, you, you, you. You joined it. You jumped on the train about, about dating.

[B]

Okay, But I think that. I also think that, Mon, I think you might be shocked at how many sexless relationships are in the world. I think it Might blow your mind. How many people are just fully not having sex in their relationships, like, at all?

[A]

Oh, I know. I said for me. I know, I know. I know. A lot of them I don't know. I know. I know about three friends in relationships. They don't have sex and they're close. They either masturbate.

[B]

I think it's also different. That's different for you because you are in your very early. Your third. Not your earlier. You are 30. You're not even in your 30s yet. You're at the end of your 20s, technically. And you.

[A]

I'm in my early 30s. I'm about to be 32.

[B]

Are you 31 already? No, you're not. But you're 30. You're 30.

[A]

What? I told you the year corresponds with the. The end of the number on my thing. I am going to be 32 in less than a month.

[B]

Wait, 32?

[D]

Really?

[A]

Yes. You must be 36.

[B]

I am about to be 36. So you're in your early 30s, and you're also in the early stages of your relationship. So you're like, I couldn't even dream of not having sex double back when you're 50 and y' all been together for 40 years or I can't do math, 20 years. You might be like, we'd be twice a week.

[A]

Well, I'm not there. Yeah, I'm not there. So I can only speak from my current experiences and my current experiences as a young 30, 31 year old. I could not imagine not having sex with a partner. That's just for me. I'm sure when I got Earl. When you get older, there's so many part. There's so many things. You lose your libido and your body changes. Different things. Like, of course there are different things that are coming to the mix that will. Maybe I won't. Not maybe. I probably will not want to have sex as much and et cetera. But for now, as a 31 year old, I don't see that for me.

[B]

Well, we're not talking about you. We're talking about.

[A]

So you are. You're assuming you're also.

[B]

Also.

[A]

She's in her early 20s, so the probability that this person's gonna want to

[B]

have a lot of sex is very true.

[A]

Early twenties.

[B]

How do you know how this person is? Oh, no.

[A]

Oh, I'm reading the previous question. Sorry, that was early 20s.

[B]

You better just give an age, a gender, and a. And a name and a hometown first. We have no. We have no clue.

[A]

I did not give a gender I've been saying person.

[B]

I've been saying person.

[A]

I did not give a gender.

[B]

Wow. I also said home. I also said, are you. Are you. Oh, somebody is in a.

[D]

42 year old woman.

[B]

This is a 42 year old woman. And Monet, she said, she's. She's. She goes like. She goes to Euphoria high school. She's 17.

[A]

Euphoria. Euphoria. I knew you're going there. Euphoria. Euphoria. You didn't even watch the show. You didn't watch the show. Stop making references to shows you don't watch because it's embarrassing.

[B]

I never watched it once. I've watched it once. I actually did watch one.

[A]

Yeah, so stop talking about the show.

[B]

You are wild today. Ever since you put that wig on. Ever since you put that wig under that hat, you've been wild, girl. Wild.

[A]

Jacob's telling you to shut your mouth and wrap up.

[B]

Don't be rolling a little white ass fingers at me. Also, when we ran Aspen, Monet pointed at Jacob and yelled, jacob is a Jew. And she pointed at him and yelled it into the room full of everyone. We were. Were gagged. We were.

[A]

It was not everyone. It was literally you. You don't remember? It was. We did the podcast about when we just wake up and it was literally just you, Jacob and I in the room. So.

[B]

No, because Andy. Because Andy was like. I feel like that is inappropriate to say. I remember one point, Andy, because we were actually.

[C]

You're lying.

[B]

Because we were actually playing that game and. And we were playing the game and then Andy was like, that feels.

[A]

Oh, the Hitler thing. The Hitler thing. Are. The Hitler thing.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

We also rehashed it.

[B]

Jesus. Jesus. Not yelling the Hitler thing. My boyfriend is Jewish. Monet is just yelling the Hitler thing. This is crazy. I can't believe this is happening.

[A]

You are the. I like. Every time we do this podcast, you top yourself on more and more ways that you can be the most insane, the craziest, ridiculous person I know. Like, you constantly top yourself and set the bar. I am honestly impressed. Thoroughly.

[B]

You're the one yelling. Jacob is you while yelling the Hitler thing. That's you. That's what you're doing. You are wild.

[A]

Oh, God.

[C]

Thank God.

[A]

We gotta wrap it up, Bob. You have a good receipt?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You have a good night.

[B]

A real podcast co host. Bitch. You can't have that podcast. We can shut this one down. We can start. We can start from scratch, mister.

[A]

Let's go. Goodbye, bitch.

[B]

Bye.

[C]

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