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- [00:00]
A
We all prefer things a certain way, like groceries. If you want groceries just how you like them, you gotta try Instacart. They have a new preference picker that lets you pick how ripe or unripe you want your bananas. Shoppers can see your preferences upfront, helping guide their choices. Because when it comes to groceries, the details matter. Instacart get groceries just how you like.
- [00:22]
B
My name is Bob the drag Queen,
- [00:24]
A
and I'm Monet x change, and this is sibling rivalry. On this week's episode, we reveal what time we left for the Lizzo concert.
- [00:49]
B
We revisit weddings, and we find out
- [00:52]
A
what made Bob say this.
- [00:54]
B
Dean started juggling on the dance floor, and Dean was like, let me show you how it's done, hon. And we find out what made Monae say this.
- [01:04]
A
If I am wrong, I will eat Colleen's dog. Dog food. Colleen's cat food on camera.
- [01:12]
B
So I need to address something.
- [01:14]
A
Uh huh.
- [01:15]
B
The Patriots were acting wild while you were telling your SZA story. They were like, bob is not happy for Monet. Bob does not want good things for Monet. Whenever something good happens for Monet, Bob is mad. And I was like, y', all, you
- [01:30]
A
should say the patrons and Monet, because we all. We all agree
- [01:35]
B
that's what you feel in your heart.
- [01:37]
A
Yeah, I do.
- [01:38]
B
Then we have nothing to discuss. All right, so tell me what's going on with your life this week?
- [01:43]
A
Wait, so you saw these comments and did you comment back? Did you reply anything?
- [01:47]
B
No, I wrote the disc. I was like, why do y' all think I would not want good things to happen from onenae? Like, I don't. That is so odd that people would be like, bob doesn't like good things that happen from him. To me, that sounds crazy,
- [02:02]
A
but I
- [02:02]
B
guess you and the patrons feel the way that you feel. So live your life. Live it, honey.
- [02:07]
A
Live your life, Rihanna. Well, we're gonna talk about the topic. I'm very intrigued about this topic this week. But as for me in my house, I haven't seen you since the Lizzo concert. When we were in Indianapolis to see the Lizzo concert and we didn't. So people are very intrigued. They're very curious about what time did we end up leaving? We ended up leaving, but I was ready. Well, we were ready about the same time, but I text Bob at around 7:20.
- [02:33]
B
Wait, why are people cares about us?
- [02:34]
A
Because we made it a big deal. We were like, you made it a big deal? You were like, you like, y', all, Monet is crazy. Monet Wanted to leave for the wild.
- [02:41]
B
That was really wild. We ended up leaving very early. We ended up leaving. We ended up leaving not at the time Monet said. We.
- [02:47]
A
We didn't know the time about it. I said, but we didn't know the time. You said, bitch, I was ready before you. And after we finished the podcast, I still had to go and shower and get ready. And I called this nigga at 7:20. I was like, you ready yet, girl? You like, Yeah. I just had to do one thing, and I'll meet you at the elevator.
- [03:00]
B
Just. Just to be clear, when Monet saying she was ready before me, Monet's idea of being ready before me, I literally went down to the front desk to grab something. Came back upstairs. Mon's acting like it was like, 20. I was literally dressed before.
- [03:14]
A
That's still ready before.
- [03:15]
B
And also, I also want to point out that me and Monet were both at the elevator at the exact same time. You were not. In fact. In fact. Whoa, whoa. In fact, I watched you come around the corner because I was already at the elevator.
- [03:29]
A
Okay, first of all, it is a social. Everyone knows. Everyone knows. The social contract is if you text your friend, if you're the one being like, hey, you ready to go? That person is ready before you. Everyone in the world abides by that rule. If you are friends and you're like. And you're the one in the group being like, hey, y' all ready to go? That's the person that's ready to go.
- [03:44]
B
But when you came around the corner, I was already.
- [03:47]
A
No, you were coming out of your element because. Okay, let me explain this.
- [03:50]
B
We made the elevator at the same time.
- [03:52]
A
My room was down the. My room. So you come up the elevator. Bob's room was, like, maybe five rooms from the elevator. Mine was another. Like, what I want to say. I don't even know. Yards, yards. Feet. Mine was like another, like, 200ft down. So we left our rooms. Two rooms.
- [04:09]
B
Another two rooms.
- [04:09]
A
No, because you were.
- [04:11]
B
What. What was your room at the most? 3 room. I don't remember your.
- [04:14]
A
What was your room number?
- [04:14]
B
Monat. I felt like I heard 200 yards. There's no way you were.
- [04:17]
A
What you heard was wrong.
- [04:18]
B
There's no. You were two football fields away.
- [04:22]
A
200ft, honey, I'm underneath.
- [04:24]
B
We're gonna need to play that back because anyway, that's not the point. The point is you were literally a less than a 30 minute, 30 second walk from my door. Okay?
- [04:34]
A
And then on the call, I said, hey. I was like, hey, you ready, girl? You were like, yeah, I just need to do one thing. And then I was like, okay, so I'll meet you at the elevator at. Or downstairs or at the elevator at
- [04:43]
B
the time, because my key card didn't work, so I have to go downstairs and get a new key card. So. So just to be clear, answer this question. When you came to the elevator, was I not already there?
- [04:52]
A
No. We met coming out of the rooms.
- [04:56]
B
So were you at the elevator before me?
- [04:58]
A
No, I was not.
- [04:59]
B
So were you ready before me then? Yeah. Were you just sitting in your room hanging out?
- [05:04]
A
Yes, I really was.
- [05:06]
B
Bitch, you know you fucking lying. Cause I said, I'll meet you. I said, okay, I'll meet you in the lobby. Then why did I meet you on the way to elevator? So Monet was like, I'm ready. I. I tried to get back in my room. My key was not working. I said, shit, I have to go to the front desk. No, actually, I went to the front desk to get toothpaste. I remember now. I went to the front desk. I was. I was like, oh, let me brush my teeth real quick. I went in my bag. I was like, shit. That's right. I took my toothpaste out.
- [05:25]
A
You looked in your bag?
- [05:27]
B
I looked. I looked at my. I looked at my bag. I said, oh, shit. I looked at my bag.
- [05:30]
A
I went in my bag.
- [05:31]
B
Shit. No, I went in my bag. Shit. There's no toothpaste. I had a large toothpaste from the last thing. So I had to go to the front desk and say, do you guys have toothpaste? And then I came back, brushed my teeth and. And then on the way out my door, Monet behind me. Not in front of me, behind me.
- [05:46]
A
Okay, wait a minute.
- [05:47]
B
Not in front of me.
- [05:48]
A
We're both on our way to the elevator. And also I was meeting you at the downstairs at the time that we now said, which was, I call you at 7:20.
- [05:54]
B
But you weren't there before me. What are you.
- [05:56]
A
You weren't there before me, but my case never thought I was the day before you. I said I was ready before. I never said I was at the elevator before. I said, you're not ready till you're there.
- [06:03]
B
If you just text and say you're adding that.
- [06:07]
A
No, that's not a social contract.
- [06:09]
B
No, that is actually social contract. If we all say, I will meet at Mickey's at 10 o' clock if you live next door, I don't care what time you're there, is when you get to the spot If I live two hours away and you live next door, it is when you get there. It's not who's ready first, it's when you get there. So if we say we're meeting downstairs, it's when you get downstairs, it's not when you're ready. Sitting in your home on your thumb.
- [06:33]
A
Yeah, no, that's different at a hotel. Changes when you're a group of friends at the hotel and then all of us who like you would like, meet up with your friends in town or y' all go to the place when the one that we call and be
- [06:45]
B
like, we said downstairs, but you didn't get. You said. You said you did not get downstairs before me.
- [06:51]
A
You never got downstairs. I was the one who, who messaged us. Anyway, that's the other point. So we ended up leaving like around.
- [06:56]
B
Yeah, what point are you trying to make? Because you were like, you were ready.
- [07:00]
A
Like, what's. How we left. We ended up leaving for the concert at 7:30. People were curious what time we left there. We left the concert, we left. We left the hotel about seven. About 7:30. But again, the hotel was like a five to seven minute walk away. So we got there probably like around 7:40.
- [07:16]
B
I'm trying to find the text that says. I don't have a text saying that you're ready.
- [07:20]
A
No, I called you on the phone and I can. Let me see if my phone goes back that far. I'll tell you what time I called you. What day was that? We went. That was last Tuesday. Oh, here we go. Oh, we had called Chris Dunbar, the podcast. I called Bobby caldwell Tuesday at 4:20. Oh, I don't come with your number anyway. I can do a screen.
- [07:46]
B
I'm not saying you didn't come at 420, but that. Anyway, I would say two things. One, we left, which I think we said we were going to leave around 4:15. Well, whatever time.
- [07:57]
A
15, 7:15. Yeah.
- [07:59]
B
And we ended up leaving five minutes later.
- [08:00]
A
But we did not leave 7:30 because I called just at.
- [08:06]
B
You think it took 10 minutes to get from your door to the lobby?
- [08:09]
A
No, I'm saying. So I called you at 4:20 and you were like, yeah, I just had to do one thing. And I think that's when you went downstairs to get the toothbrush when you came back. So that all took about five minutes. By the time we left and met the elevator, we got downstairs like around like 7:27 or something like that.
- [08:23]
B
I don't know the exact time, but we did not leave at 7:45 like Monet suggested, which was absolutely. I still stand by. That is. And also, not to mention, even though we left at the time we left, we walked in during Saucy Santana's performance. When we walked in, Saucy was on. So we were already that. That we were. We had already been done. Been behind. And we also waited like a maybe two minutes because we were gonna catch a car. But. Yeah, but we just. We just. We chose to walk instead. So we also lost another two minutes deciding to walk, which. And it was about like a little less than 10 minute walk. So we got there and I distinctively remember. I actually, I remember this vivid distinctly.
- [09:04]
A
Way on. Is it distinctly?
- [09:06]
B
I said distinctively. I distinctively remember.
- [09:08]
A
When. When do you use distinctively versus distinctive?
- [09:11]
B
Distinctly distinct.
- [09:13]
A
Let me look.
- [09:15]
B
You will say that is a distinct possibility. Like, that is a distinct possibility. Like a very specific. I don't know when you would use this. No, you go ahead.
- [09:21]
A
I'm going to look it up.
- [09:23]
B
I don't know if distinctly is a word. I think, I think it's this. I think it is distinctively, distinctively distinct
- [09:28]
C
in a way that is characteristic of one person or thing. And distinct distinguishes it from others.
- [09:34]
B
Yeah, I don't think distinctly is distinct.
- [09:37]
A
Distinct is a word.
- [09:38]
B
No, distinctly. I don't think distinctly. I think distinctively is from distinct, which becomes distinctive, which becomes distinctively.
- [09:46]
A
I think distinctly is a word.
- [09:49]
C
Distinctively is something that distinguishes one thing from another. Distinctly is something that is like incredibly obvious and apparent.
- [09:58]
A
Got it.
- [09:59]
C
So that how that vest is distinctively Bob's, because Bob had his vest phase, or that vest is a distinct vest because it is bright red with polka dots on it.
- [10:11]
B
All right, so let me get to my point. So. So we got to the thing and I said. And I said. We walked through the. Through the metal detectors and I looked at my old nay and I said, bitch, if we would have left on your schedule, we'd be leaving in five minutes. I remember saying that because we got there at whatever 40. And I said, if we would've leave on your schedule, we'd leaving in five minutes. And then we walked in during Saucy Santana's performance. So I still wish we could have left on the 15, but we did not make it on the 15. And we could have probably caught all of Saucy Santana's performance.
- [10:42]
A
To be fair, when we got there, bitch, we like went around buying drinks, buying like nachos, buying like all this stuff. Like we was running around like we was fucking.
- [10:50]
B
But Saucy was Performing for a bit. Because, girl, the tea is when we.
- [10:54]
A
I mean, we don't know that we're using context.
- [10:58]
B
No, no, no. All I'm gonna say is what truly happened, which was during Saucy's final performance, I think was walk. Or I think it was walk.
- [11:05]
A
His, like, you know, it was booty.
- [11:08]
B
Was it booty?
- [11:09]
A
I'm pretty sure it was booty.
- [11:11]
B
No, I think it was walk because I remember him doing the whole booty with all the dancers. Then he did walk by himself. Anyway, whatever. I can't remember which one it was. But during Saucy's last song, they cut. They. They cut. They just cut the song in the middle of the song.
- [11:21]
A
That bitch, not just the song. They cut the song off and some of the lights.
- [11:26]
B
No, they turn the house lights up
- [11:27]
A
and they cut the stage lights down.
- [11:29]
B
Cut the radio, turn his mic down. I was like, oh, my God. Like, during the. I was gagged.
- [11:36]
A
Well, you know, I'm not sure why that happened, but I will say, mom, and I know this. Like, when you are at these venues, especially a big arena, like, they're running on union time, which means, like, they ain't trying to go over. Cause, bitch, when you start going over union time, you are paying tens of thousands of dollars every, like, 10 minutes. Minute. Whatever. Whatever the deal is. So, bitch, the show runs on time. So, like, that means Lizzo had to go on the time she's supposed to. And then Latto was performing after Saucy. So I think that. So I don't know what happened, but that happened when? At the end of Saucy set.
- [12:07]
B
Yeah. We do not know why they cut Saucy off. But, baby, they cut her off. I was gagged. I don't know if she was running long. I don't know if she was running late or I don't know if they were just like, maybe they do it. Maybe they do it in every town. Maybe in every town.
- [12:19]
A
They cut Saucy off.
- [12:20]
B
It's part of the show and it's all mystery what's going on.
- [12:25]
A
This happened at acl, too. When we were out acl, Day two, Boy George was performing. What's the group? His group, Culture Club. I mean, their group, Culture Club was performing, which is. Boy George is the lead singer of Culture Club. And after him. So he's at this big place right here. And I will say maybe 200 yards, about 500ft. The other way was the.
- [12:49]
B
See, you did it again. I think you said yards before.
- [12:52]
A
I was being silly to say because
- [12:55]
B
I think back then, you did say two football.
- [12:56]
A
I did it. No.
- [12:57]
B
I won't go in here until we can't rewind while we're recording. But I can't wait till the episode drop.
- [13:03]
A
I promise. I said feet and Then so about 500ft. What if you're wrong, though?
- [13:07]
B
What if you're wrong? What will you do for that?
- [13:08]
A
I know I'm not. I know I'm not.
- [13:09]
B
What if you are? What if.
- [13:12]
A
If I am wrong? I will eat Colleen's dog. Dog food. Colleen's cat food on camera.
- [13:18]
B
All right, go ahead.
- [13:19]
A
And if I'm right, what do you. Will you eat the same cat food?
- [13:23]
B
No, I said. You might have said that. You're definitive. I'm not defending. You're defending.
- [13:27]
A
So let's say I'm right. What are you gonna do? Let's just say, if I'm right, what are you gonna do?
- [13:31]
B
Literally nothing. I'll say, oh, you're right.
- [13:33]
A
You such a pussy ass nigga. Anyway, so about like 500ft away, you know, I know. I'm changing my mind. You touch a dick ass nigga. Anyways, about 500ft away, Sophie Tucker.
- [13:43]
B
Not the pejorative. Not pussy is a pejorative.
- [13:45]
A
Sophie Tucker was performing and, like, so she was.
- [13:48]
B
They.
- [13:49]
A
They were starting at like 4:15. And also, boy George had to be done by that time. So Boy George was running his set. So at like 4:12, he's like, you
- [13:57]
B
know, they're not gonna shut me off. I'm gonna keep on singing for you because you're here to see me today
- [14:04]
A
at 4, 14 and 59 milliseconds. When I tell you they shut his mic off, everything off. And Sophie Tucker went on at 4:15
- [14:14]
B
because the stage opened beneath him. He fell through. They opened the trapdoor.
- [14:19]
A
So then Boy George is just.
- [14:21]
B
They're not gonna cut me off.
- [14:24]
A
Void George is just. But he went on doing his music, like, with no microphone but no amplification, just on stage doing his thing. I was like, this is crazy. Do you really wanna hurt Me? Also, anyone else was there? Boy George was singing, like, a lot of reggae music. And I think a lot of this was, like, kid stuff. But I was so shocked to see how much reggae music that Boy George, like, has in his set. I don't know. Some of it was. Some of it was colors. Some of it was his own stuff. But I was like, boy George has a lot of reggae.
- [14:55]
B
Well, do youo really Wanna Hurt Me? Has a slight reggae tone to it. Oh, yeah.
- [14:58]
A
Oh, sure. There's a lot of stuff like that. Anyway, you were saying something, and I got you.
- [15:01]
B
Oh, so then Lotto goes up, by the way. Lotto. I think Lotto's on her third name now. Her name used to be mulatto, and now they're called. Now they call her Lotto, but all night they almost exclusively called her Big Lotto.
- [15:15]
A
Is that like. Like, people?
- [15:16]
B
I don't know if it's an official name or if it's like a nick. I don't know. Maybe it's not an official name, but. But I also found that Lotto is, like. She is like Megan Stallion's height.
- [15:25]
A
I didn't realize how big, how, like, tall she was.
- [15:27]
B
First of all, Clayton county, anyway. And she is like, 5 11, 5 10. Her and Lizzo are the same. I think she might be a little bit taller. She's Megan Thee, Stallion.
- [15:39]
A
Lizzo is five' ten, though.
- [15:41]
B
She's the same height as Megan V. Tyra Sanchez. Not Tyra Sanchez. Tyra Banks.
- [15:49]
A
Monet X Change.
- [15:50]
B
Jordan Sparks. Monet X Change. Megan Thee, Stallion Lotto is tall.
- [15:53]
A
We'll tell you five' ten.
- [15:55]
B
Wait. We'll tell you what else to find today when we get back.
- [16:02]
A
Close your eyes. Exhale.
- [16:04]
B
Feel your body relax.
- [16:06]
A
And let go of whatever you're carrying today. Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts. Oh, my gosh, they're so fast.
- [16:18]
C
And breathe.
- [16:19]
B
Oh, sorry.
- [16:20]
A
I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste. Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order. 1-800-contacts.
- [16:32]
B
I'm Kiana, and I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turned back. I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know, and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like, I can't stop. I'm addicted.
- [16:58]
A
Start your free trial@shopify.com we back. But do you know who can't? Who? None of these hoes can step to who's still selling on all these bitches, you know? Malia.
- [17:07]
B
Malia. Obama.
- [17:08]
A
Malia. No, Sasha. Obama.
- [17:10]
B
No, Malia. I think it's Malia.
- [17:12]
A
I'm pretty sure it's Sasha, bitch.
- [17:13]
B
What Are you going to do? You're going to go eat some dog food, Some cat food?
- [17:16]
A
I'm going to feed you. Feed it to you. Ho.
- [17:18]
B
Are you sure?
- [17:19]
A
I'm pretty sure.
- [17:21]
B
Malia Obama is. And I don't know how to find it. Malia Obama is 6 foot 1.
- [17:29]
A
How tall is Sasha Obama?
- [17:30]
B
Sasha Obama.
- [17:31]
C
Sasha Obama is five nine.
- [17:33]
B
Five nine.
- [17:34]
A
You should have bet me. You would have won
- [17:37]
B
anyway.
- [17:37]
A
Can I tell you, I've been a little.
- [17:39]
B
And then Lizzo went and it was amazing.
- [17:41]
A
Lizzo was really great. Lizzo is a really great singer. She, she sounds. Her live vocals are so, so good. And all the dancers, the big girls. One of my favorite big girls from the show because again, I watched the show. The show was really brilliant. Her name starts with an A. I always forget her name. But she became like one of the fan favorites on the show. Like. Cause her personality, she's such a good dancer. Like, she's so like all the things. And so anytime she would come across the screen, the screen, everyone would be like, wow. And Lizzo gave her like a little special shout out. My homegirl Jayla was not a part of the show. I wish I could have seen her there. But the big girls were fucking everything. Lizzo was great and it was just, it was a great concert. It really was great.
- [18:20]
B
Speaking of fierce big girls, Delicious Gucci was performing in Santana set. It was so lovely to see her. She looks so beautiful. And I said it that night on social media and I would say it again. I honestly think that Lizzo might be the most important artist of our generation. I really believe that when I think about it, no one at her level is doing what she's doing. Like, Lizzo's music isn't like, my body's so snatched. Like, she's not like, my body's great because it meets Eurocentric beauty standards. Her message isn't like, I got so much money, y' all niggas is broke as hell. Her. Her message is like, I'm great because I'm me. My body's great because it's my body. Like, I mean, Blisso does have some beauty that is quote unquote, Eurocentric. You know what I mean? But I, but, but it, but she doesn't like go in on that. She's not like, I'm lighter skinned than these dark skinned. I'm, you know, my waist. No, she's not saying that.
- [19:21]
A
I'm saying. But which artists be saying about light skinned, dark skin?
- [19:23]
B
I don't know. I'm sure there's someone out there who's like Light Skinned Team Dark Skinned. It's all. It's all over Tik Tok and stuff. I don't know any artists are saying it, but there's a lot of like Team Light Skinned Team Dark Skinned on the Internet. A lot of that discourse. And she is like really? And not only that, but her music is. It has a sense of humor while being poignant. Like she can write a song like I love you but have it still be very song.
- [19:46]
A
Her album Special is a really good album. I really enjoy the album. If you listen to the whole album right through the last track, she is like, she. She's talking to the audience about how like why this album is special and how everyone who listens to it is special and like how like why she made the album, which is a really nice. Just artists back in the day, like not everyone used to do that, but a lot of like the end of the Beyonce. Not Beyonce. Destiny Child. What is the name of the album? The Last Destiny Fulfilled when at the end of that and the one before that. The last track was just so different than everything else. It was either like a message to the fans or like when they did the Amen. Thank you, Lord. Hallelujah. That one. Like I miss when artists like from the 90s and early 2000s do. The artists. Maybe the artists that I'm not listening to don't do that as much. But that was a really fun thing artists used to do. And I mean, I agree with you. I think Lizzo is fucking great. I love how she sings about her body, but I think other artists do that too. Like Megan Desallion. I think Megan Desallion, she sings about her body and rapping about. Yes. How fierce it is, but also how she didn't say she loves her natural curves and her waist and stuff like that. So I agree with what you're saying,
- [20:57]
B
but it's coming from a different place because of how Meghan looks.
- [21:00]
A
It's just for sure.
- [21:01]
B
Just when. When. When when Tyra Banks celebrates her face versus someone who's. Who maybe has like a cleft lip or a so and so or something. Or something that society at large says is not beautiful and then you celebrate it. It's not coming from the same place.
- [21:18]
A
I agree with that for sure.
- [21:20]
B
As Gigi Hadid being like, I'm giving face. Face is just not the same Gigant
- [21:25]
A
Hadid that had a song.
- [21:26]
B
No, if I'm saying if because of how.
- [21:29]
A
Because of how I said this is too much. Gigi And Bella Hadid out here with
- [21:33]
B
tracks on because of how traditionally or conventionally beautiful she is. And. And Lizzo is conventionally beautiful in a lot of ways, but she's also beautiful in some ways that the world says she should not feel beautiful about herself. So when she sings about her body, it's just going to be different than when Megan sings. You know, with an ass this fat and a waist this small, it's just not gonna. It's not gonna hit the same.
- [21:55]
A
I also. I'm obsessed. I get. Y' all know I've said this before about other people's teeth. I'm obsessed with Lizzo's teeth. I love the shape of her teeth. Another person, I'm obsessed with their teeth. Blue hydrangea. Like, the way that their teeth naturally or are. I don't know. I mean, they seem natural to me, but again, I'm not a fucking dentist or an orthodontist. I don't know. But I'm obsessed with the shape of Liz's teeth. Y' all just Google pictures of Lizzo smiling. I love the shape of her teeth. I really obsess over hands and teeth, and I fucking love when she smiles. I can hear my echo on YouTube now. I don't know if you just. You raised me. You screamed so before you were screaming, nigga. But, yeah, I think I love her. I love her teeth and I love her cheekbones. I love that. I wish. Would you ever get filler?
- [22:39]
B
No, not right now, anyway. Maybe if my face is sung, bitch, my face is full. It's juicing up.
- [22:45]
A
We know some of the girls who were. They look juiced up, too, but they just got, you know, just got a little something to make them. I always think about it, maybe I should do a little filler just to have a little.
- [22:55]
B
It might make you feel good. You should do it if it makes you feel good, you know?
- [22:57]
A
But people say filler falls. I want to, but I'm so scared of everyone. Be like, girl, get filler. But filler falls. Remember that. And I'd be like, what does that mean?
- [23:05]
B
Well, then you can get implants, and implants can be taken out.
- [23:08]
A
No, I slice them up. My face, bitch. My skin does not heal well. I ain't trying to be slicing on my face.
- [23:14]
B
How do you think they put cheek implants in? In. You think they just cut your cheek?
- [23:17]
A
I'm sure they go through back here. No, they don't cut your shape, but they probably go somewhere in back hair. But again, a lot of people who get that stuff Bob, these bitches have hair, okay? People that get face lifts, they cut them up here. We. I don't have anything to hide. Nothing. I'm exposed.
- [23:30]
B
Wait, how did Cheek. Cheek.
- [23:32]
C
They go in through your mouth.
- [23:33]
B
They go in through your. Yeah, yeah. They will never see those upper lip.
- [23:36]
C
Like, under your lip. Like under your upper lip.
- [23:40]
A
Jacob, have you looked at. How did Jacob know. Jacob. Jacob looked into it before in the past. Jacob. Trying to get something done.
- [23:44]
C
Maybe.
- [23:46]
A
Jacob actually has pretty. Pretty high cheekbones. Jacob. Jacob. Jacob. I don't know. Jacob's done with his plastic surgery or if he has any plastic surgery, but Jacob looks like he has Phil because he has very high cheekbones.
- [23:57]
B
Jacob's very, very great cheekbones. But, yeah, I. So you should get it done. If you don't, you know, they can take them out, and if you don't. And if they're.
- [24:03]
A
I'm not interested.
- [24:04]
B
An implant. Implant. I don't think implants fall, so I'm
- [24:07]
A
just saying they don't, but you can get.
- [24:09]
B
That's probably a lot. Mind it for the future, cheek implants are probably much safer for your facial structure than getting filler. So I'm saying. I'm just saying, if you're considering filler, you might want to consider cheek implants.
- [24:23]
A
The positive, getting cheek implants to see if I like it, then in like, a year being, like, then going to surgery, get them out. That's.
- [24:30]
B
No one said a year. But also. But I'm saying, like. But the. The cheek stuff will. If it's gonna fall and you can't get filler out. I don't know if you can get filler out.
- [24:36]
A
You can get. You can get. You can get your filler dissolved. Like, people that get, like, lip filler on their lips, like Juvederm or whatever, they can put stuff for this to make it dissolve.
- [24:45]
B
There's a point of no return because I think they, like, one time, Kim was like. Kim was like, I gotta get my lips undone or something.
- [24:52]
A
Dissolved. You get them dissolved?
- [24:54]
B
No. Kim is very open about getting her lips. Kim can't hide her. That she got her lips done. Kim is Kardashian, who you guys think I'm talking about. No, I'm kidding. But also, what I love about all these artists is how they're, like, married to their music. Speaking of marriage. Monet weddings.
- [25:09]
A
That segue. I killed it. I cannot.
- [25:11]
B
You're jealous, and I killed it.
- [25:12]
A
No, no, Bob. If you would have worked it in a little. You would have worked it in a little subtly. Like, you literally just Figured out these artists, they're married to their music.
- [25:19]
B
You're Aggie.
- [25:22]
A
Can y' all please comment below and rate that transition? Please rate that segue that Bob does it. I'm very curious. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being like 10 being like, not
- [25:31]
B
want me to just have this moment. You can't just let me just do the transition and move on. You are so.
- [25:35]
A
You are so being like Bob. You just nailed that. Honestly, I didn't even recognize it.
- [25:39]
B
I used to think I had no, like, enemies and opps. Bitch, is it you? Bitch, it you.
- [25:45]
A
Oh, bitch. And believe that. Yes, bitch. I'm your motherfucking op. I'm your enemy. Yeah, I ain't hiding, nigga. I'm right here.
- [25:52]
B
But we're not on a level playing ground, honey.
- [25:54]
A
Oh, yeah, you're right. Cause, nigga, you under me, honey, you below me, nigga. Use my son. Use my son. Yo, N from Clayton county say, yo,
- [26:03]
B
let me tell you something.
- [26:05]
A
If N from Clayton county had to fare one with N from Brooklyn, y' all really think that y' all niggas would really be out here? Yo, anyway, bust this topic, marriage, what
- [26:16]
B
would you beat me in? What? What and what, nigga? Yeah, we're gonna move on from that.
- [26:21]
A
Yeah, we have to move on.
- [26:23]
B
And basically every. First of all, outside of actually fighting in every physical thing we've ever done, we've proven I am stronger than you.
- [26:30]
A
And okay, first of all, it does not need to be.
- [26:33]
B
I have stronger reach than you.
- [26:34]
A
The strongest fighter. Have you ever seen those viral videos of them? Of those little women fucking up these. These, these. These trans women who are tiny as fuck, fucking up these big ass homosexual. Are you the tiny one?
- [26:45]
B
Are you the tiny one?
- [26:45]
A
Yeah.
- [26:47]
B
Tiny.
- [26:49]
A
Fucking up these big ass transphobes. Yeah. Size of size and strength don't mean shit. Are you.
- [26:53]
B
Are you the tiny one?
- [26:54]
A
Yes, I am. Purr.
- [26:57]
B
You better work. You better say you are tidy of a season.
- [27:01]
A
Yeah.
- [27:02]
B
How many weddings have you been to in 2022?
- [27:05]
A
In 2022, I've been to two weddings. I went to two weddings in 2022, both with Andy.
- [27:14]
B
They call Andy's friends.
- [27:15]
A
Yeah. Andy always got some friends that get married.
- [27:17]
B
Always, always and forever.
- [27:19]
A
And then, oh, there was a third one. So my friend Jenny Jaffe, who. Her and Andy were friends, and now Jenny and I became. And her husband Dan. Shout out to Jenny and Dan. They just got married in September. Jenny is an amazing writer. She writes for the Rugrats. She's a showrunner for so many shows on Nickelodeon. She's so fucking dope. So funny, so smart, such a good writer. Anyway, they had a wedding on September 24th, right?
- [27:46]
C
Okay.
- [27:47]
A
And she really wanted me to come, but September 24th, if you remember, was the day of our New York show. And she was like. And her. I was at their house last night. They did this thing. And then she was like, you know what we almost did? Right? Her husband was telling me. I was like, what? He was like, we really wanted you to come to the wedding. So what we were gonna do was buy every ticket for your New York show for the Civil Rivalry tour and
- [28:12]
B
be like,
- [28:15]
A
come to come to our wedding? I was like, dad, y' all are crazy.
- [28:20]
B
Can they afford to buy every ticket for our show?
- [28:22]
A
Yeah.
- [28:22]
B
That much money?
- [28:24]
A
Yeah.
- [28:26]
B
Also, I would like your friend to know. Jenny, Jeffrey, if you're listening, I would have been very upset with you. That would not have been funny. They were not, obviously. I'm just letting you know, if you ever. If you think about that in the future, that shit would have not been cute. That would have been a nightmare.
- [28:41]
A
I fucking loved. I love them. They're so sweet and very kind. They were obviously kidding. I was like, dad, if you did that.
- [28:46]
B
Honestly, I don't know. I don't know. Obvious. I don't know these niggas. Honestly.
- [28:50]
A
What a fierce move. Imagine Bob, also to. That is something you would do to me.
- [28:57]
C
Literally.
- [28:57]
A
Bob, in the podcast, I was like Monet, when you were selling all your costumes. I was. I had a. I had half a mind to buy each and every one of them and then mail them right back to you. That is. That is some Bob shit.
- [29:07]
B
Yeah. But not to, like, cancel your show. Not to cancel your hometown show on your. I want. I want to be clear, buying all of the costumes, I would have.
- [29:16]
A
I would have been very mad at you.
- [29:17]
B
And canceling your hometown show to come to my wedding. That's not the same thing.
- [29:22]
A
I'll still be mad.
- [29:23]
B
That's not on the same level.
- [29:25]
A
I'll still be mad.
- [29:28]
B
Sure. I mean, your feelings are your feelings, but that is. I would like to make it very clear those are not the same thing.
- [29:34]
A
But. So I was supposed to. I was supposed to go to that wedding, but we were on tour. I didn't go to that one. So I went to two. One, the first one was in Boston at this very nice wedding in Boston. And then the second one was in rural Vermont, and it was very sweet. Oh, my God, you so extra. Was in rural Vermont.
- [29:51]
B
I'm reading Something, bitch. This has nothing to do with you.
- [29:53]
A
I'm reading something. I thought because you're. You're screening. Your camera is such bad quality, it look like you're doing this.
- [29:59]
B
First of all, I am filming on a very nice camera. Make that. Let's get that clear.
- [30:03]
A
We can't tell. How many weddings did you go to in 20? 22.
- [30:07]
B
I've gone to two weddings.
- [30:09]
A
You got to beat me so bad.
- [30:11]
B
Damn.
- [30:13]
A
Continue.
- [30:14]
B
I'm going to two weddings, both in the same month. My brother got married and Jacob's sister got married. Oh, yeah.
- [30:21]
A
How was the wedding this past weekend?
- [30:23]
B
It was lovely. It was a Jewish Christian wedding. Heavy on the Jewish.
- [30:32]
A
Similar to what you and Jacob would have. Go ahead.
- [30:34]
B
Say again.
- [30:35]
A
Similar to what you and Jacob were gonna have. Go ahead.
- [30:37]
B
Jacob and I would not be having a Christian wedding. And I don't know how. I mean. I mean, well, Jacob is culturally Jewish, but he's not really. He's not religious, you know? But anyway, it was. The service was. The service was very. There was a rabbi and a minister who, like, were, like, literally, like, trading the microphone. Like, they would go back and forth, and, like, the rabbi would talk and the minister would talk, and the rabbi would talk, and the minister would talk. There was something that happened during the service that I remember thinking to myself, I know that some Christian would be like, see? See?
- [31:13]
A
Like, what?
- [31:14]
B
Okay, what happened was. Am I allowed to say this, Jacob? So what happened was the minister Monat has something to say. This has never, ever helped her remind us, but we did it anyway. Type it down, bitch. Type it on your screen or write it down somewhere. So the minister was talking, and the minister did her whole thing, and then she married them. In the Christian way, she's like, in the Christian way, we do this. And then as the rabbi started doing her thing, like, the rabbi was like, so, like, she was like, all right, so let's start. I mean, in some ways, she was saying it better than. She's like, let's start the Jewish portion now of the actual ceremony. And as she opens her mouth, the microphone was like, like, I mean, like, it was like. Like, it was like, work. I mean, perfectly. And the rabbi goes, all right, here we go. And then the microphone was like, ra, Ra. And it was, like, not working. Then she's like, oh, my God. And then it started working again. She was like, okay. Like, I was saying, rah, rah. And then it stopped. It just stopped working. And I know that somewhere some Christian would be like, see, that's the Lord. But then that was my old toxic Christianity not letting me go. Maybe. Maybe it was just me thinking, maybe no Christian anywhere would have thought that.
- [32:27]
A
You're not wrong, because have you seen this? I've seen a couple Christian tiktoks where they're like, nope, I had to walk out of Black Adam within the first 30 seconds of going to see it. A lot of Christians are, like, boycotting Black Adam, but apparently it's sacrilegious. And it's like the Antichrist movie. Have you heard about this? No. Girl Christians are not happy. And I was like. And then. So I told us once today. He was like, I just couldn't get through the first 30 seconds. Cause I felt. I know about everybody else. I just felt convicted in my spirit. Spirit for going to see the Black Adam movie.
- [32:59]
B
I was like, there was someone. There was someone on our Patreon or somewhere in our mention somewhere being mad at me because of my talking about, like, Southern Baptist. Being like, I hate when Bob and Monet talk about Christianity and Southern Baptist. I'm like, I'm talking about my experience growing up Southern Baptist. I am talking about my experience growing up Southern Baptist. I have very little. I have very little. What's the word I'm looking for? Like, I have very little grace for a lot of Christianity and a lot of religion in general.
- [33:37]
A
To be honest.
- [33:37]
B
I have very, very little grace for.
- [33:40]
A
Let's take a little break, then you tell me more about. Give us your Southern Baptist heritage.
- [33:48]
B
Anyway, I don't have anything about heritage, but the. The wedding was very fun. It was interesting to juxtapose it with. With my brother's wedding versus Jacob's sister's wedding, because there was a lot of dancing at both. But the dancing was just so different. I mean, like, Jewish people also. What's. What's. The guy who's. Michael Rappaport said a thing today. He was like, I don't like Jacob. How do you feel about this? He was like, I don't like people saying Jews. You need to say if you're not.
- [34:16]
A
I said this on the podcast.
- [34:17]
B
He was like, if you're not Jewish, you need to say Jew. I know a lot of Jewish people who are like, who just. They say Jews. But he was like, if you're not Jewish, you need to be saying Jewish people.
- [34:26]
A
That's how I feel when I hear people say Jews. I'm always like, that's. It just. It just feels bad. It feels weird. Like, I should not be saying Jews.
- [34:34]
B
How do you feel about it, Jacob Ritz
- [34:40]
C
I haven't actually, like, thought of that point. I think that's a response to a wave of anti Semitism that's been prevalent in the media and the world today. Yeah, so I can see why that makes sense. I. I need to maybe do more research and, like, do a little bit of reading because, like, right off the bat, it doesn't particularly bother me, but I can see and respect. Why would it bother other people? And I. This is honestly the first I've heard of it, and I need to do some more research because before I have a solid opinion that I feel comfortable being, like, this is my opinion work.
- [35:16]
B
All right. So Jewish people love to grab hands, and it's called the hora. Is this the hora, baby? Is this the horror?
- [35:28]
C
Yeah.
- [35:29]
B
So they grab hands and they are like, in a. They're like in a circle, like a bunch of little circles. Then the circles become one circle, and then there are circles inside of circles. They. They grab hand. It's almost. I don't want to be disrespect. It's almost like ring around the rosie or. But they're all holding hands and they're. And they're just, like, you know, like, kind of bouncing. And like, then they go in a certain. Then they all go in and they'll go out. And I mean, like, a lot of it, it is actually very. It is a lot of.
- [36:00]
C
So the one caveat with this is that because it was a Jewish Christian wedding, it was a mixed dance. The Jews started doing the horror in a circle, and then the Christians joined in, but the Christians don't really know how to do it properly. So it became very messy. And I would say, like, generally, if you go to, like, a Jewish wedding that's fully Jewish, like, we all kind of have it down and we know what to do and organize, but it was, like, a little bit messier. And then also because the Christians were like, this is a Jewish wedding. Every time after that, there was a dance moment. They're like, oh, we're going to spin in a circle now. And there's not that much circle dancing. And like, usually, like, one.
- [36:40]
B
There's one horror.
- [36:41]
C
There's one circle Jewish dance. They play the music, and then, like, that's a wrap. We go back to the other and, like, this wedding, like, every five minutes, somebody was like, we're starting a circle dance, and there are, like, little circle dances. So really just be like, five people spinning in a circle. And then like, across the room, it would be another five people. It was a Little bit disorganized.
- [37:02]
A
So now juxtaposed to your brother's wedding, how was your brother's wedding different?
- [37:05]
B
Well, I want to talk about before. I want to keep it, like. So they're in. They're doing the whore. And then there's also, like, lifting of people in chairs. You, like, put the bride and the groom in these chairs and you pick them up.
- [37:14]
A
I've seen that.
- [37:16]
B
And then there was this one kid. I don't think he was Jewish. He was, like this, like, Turkish kid, and I think he was one of the Christians, but he was, like, doing, like, the Russian, like, the down, up, down, up, down, up thing. But they were. I mean, everyone was going crazy for him. Like, he was in the middle of this circle doing this down, up thing. Everyone was going wild. It was very fun. At my brother's wedding, there was a lot of electric slide. There was electric slide. There was the cha cha slide. There was Meet Me at the Tramp is Going Down.
- [37:55]
A
Was there any R. Kelly stepping in the Name of Love?
- [37:57]
B
There was not a single bit of R. Kelly played at this point.
- [38:01]
A
Good, good.
- [38:01]
B
We were leaning with it, and we were rocking with it. We were doing the Cupid Shuffle.
- [38:06]
A
Your cousin. What's the name? The one with the big booty in the green?
- [38:09]
B
Monique.
- [38:10]
A
Monique, obsessed with Monique.
- [38:11]
B
You know, we might put a video of Monique right here. You never know.
- [38:15]
A
Might.
- [38:16]
B
But, yeah, my cousin Monique was really living her dreams. So there is no. There was. There was. But then also at Ellie Jacob's sister's wedding, there was also a line dancer who taught us how to, like, line dance, which basically is. The Cupid Shuffle is a line dance. The cha cha slide, the Electric Slide. They're all line dances except you just know them. Like, everyone shows up already knowing the dance. And at the. I don't think this is Jewish. I think this was a. A white thing. There was this, like, guy instructing everyone how to do the dance. He spent, like, 40 minutes teaching, teaching these dances, and then we'd all do them. So, like, he teaches, like, 40 minutes. Like, he teaches. He spends, like, time teaching it, and then we spend time doing it. So first it's like, that's too much, bitch.
- [39:05]
A
I'm at a wedding. I'm drunk. I drink.
- [39:07]
B
People are drunk doing it, and people are drunk doing it. There were about 10, 15 minutes of him teaching us how to do this dance. And. And then we do it to, like, Shake it off by Taylor Swift. And then another Timothy Timmons teaching and dancing. We do. It's Like Jailhouse Rock by Elvis.
- [39:22]
A
My favorite part of a wedding is always the reception. The reception part when the service is done and you go to the reception and you get your drinks. And my favorite part of weddings, like, okay, maybe not favorite, but one of my favorite parts is the hors d'. Oeuvres.
- [39:35]
B
Hors d'?
- [39:35]
A
Oeuvres, Bitch. When, if I get married, I'm having the fiercest hors d' oeuvres ever. Hors d' oeuvres are going to be Poppington also when, like, I love a good quiche. I love a picking a blanket. I love a crab cake. I love a shrimp wrapped in bacon. I love like we have to have. And don't try to get too fancy with your hors d'. Oeuvres. Don't try to get shit that ain't nobody had before. Don't try to get like froie gras.
- [39:59]
B
Would you like the fragra martini?
- [40:01]
A
No, no, no, no, no. Get a good quiche lorraine, a good bacon cheddar quiche and a third one for safety, a pick in a blanket. Now quiche lorraine, that's quiche bacon and ham. Ooh, you fancy, fancy. And then, and then, and then don't be basic and get just the regular circle ones. They make the ones in like squares that are a little more gourmet. That's good. You can do a pig in a blanket, but I would like to see a little variation or like a deviation of a pig in a blanket. Don't just get the fucking pigs in a blanket. You can get Auntie Annie's. If you're going to get the Auntie Annie's one, be very intentional. So we know that that's what we eatin if we wanna do like maybe like bread on the bottom, the pig on the top and the like make it a little fancier, right? So I like really nice hors d', oeuvres, like the base, the classics, but like gussy them up a little bit. And also for the entrees, I'm not gonna be every most weddings they do like a meat, like a filet mignon, a potato and like a vegetable or like a fish, some rice and a thing. I would like to do something like a chicken and waffles, some type of fairest vegetarian one. Like I would for my day if I had what I would dust it up a little bit. And how do you feel? Like the weddings you went to, did they do like the traditional parent child dance and stuff like that.
- [41:13]
B
So I want to talk about the food before I move on because a lady said something at Ellie's wedding that I did not agree with, and I was like, I agree with this. She was.
- [41:22]
A
What table were you sitting with? Were you with Jacob's family?
- [41:24]
B
I was with Jacob's family, yes. At Jacob's wedding, I was with his family. And at my brother's wedding, I was sitting with all the groomsmen, like, I had to sit with. Just. It was just me and a bunch of guys I went to high school with, like, who I have not talked to in, like, years.
- [41:39]
C
Can I add something else? So at college brother weddings, each table had about 12 wedding. 12 people on it, sitting around it. And then we were at a table. There are 12 seats. There are only four people at the table. So we were at, like, the. The island of Misfits table. It was really great, but we had a lovely time. There was the one other gay guy at the wedding who was there. He was lovely.
- [42:01]
A
Uncle Steve?
- [42:03]
C
No, one of the two other gay guys at the wedding.
- [42:05]
A
Well, just Uncle. Uncle Steve. When I went to your house, When I went to see your new house that you bought your mom, Uncle Steve showed me his fit. Uncle Steve fit was very cute. It was brown and blue.
- [42:13]
B
He ended up not wearing it. He gave it to my Uncle Ray, his brother. Cause my Uncle Ray didn't bring any clothes. My Uncle Ray just showed up in town and did not bring wedding clothes. And they were like, what?
- [42:23]
A
Did he know he was going to the wedding?
- [42:25]
B
Yes, he came for the wedding, but he ended up not having anything. Uncle. My Uncle Steve was so fucking excited about this outfit he'd been showing everyone. And I looked up, my Uncle Ray was wearing it, and I was like, uncle Steve, you're. I mean, you better than me. Because I'd have been like, nigga, go buy. Go to the store. Buy some slacks. I want to talk about this food thing before we move on. We're getting too far away from it.
- [42:44]
A
Okay, I need to remember. Wait, one last thing. Why were you at a table? Did you and Justin had the same friends in high school? Why were you at a table with your friends from high school at Justin's wedding?
- [42:55]
B
Because it was the bride and groom, and then all the bridesmaids were at one table, and all the grooms even were at one table.
- [43:00]
A
So you and Justin had, like, a lot of crossover friends.
- [43:03]
B
I mean, it's not about. I wasn't sitting with my. I wasn't sitting with my friends. There was a table just full of groomsmen. So because I'm Justin's groomsmen. I was at the table with the groomsmen. They were all friends. Cause they still talk. But I was the people that shook
- [43:16]
A
you once upon a time.
- [43:18]
B
I mean, I knew, like, two of them got it. Some of them were older than me, and we never had any conversation. But I was just at the table with the groomsmen, and there were a bunch of bridesmaids at the table because they were all bridesmaids. So they were connected through our connection to the wedding party.
- [43:33]
A
Okay.
- [43:33]
B
Food, the wedding people. So this lady was like, I wanted to see the vegetarian option because, you know, I'm not vegan, but sometimes I just get the vegan option. And I'm like, I actually feel like if you're not vegan, you probably should not just be getting the vegan option because there's probably very few of them, and it's probably counted for the vegans. So usually when you're at a thing like this, they call beforehand. Like at my brother's wedding, there was like a thing beforehand being like, what do you want? What do you want? What do you want? So you get the vegan option. And there's usually very, very few vegan options. So I feel like if you can eat the meat and you're not vegetarian, just eat it. Because there might be a vegetarian who might not get it because you took the vegan option. Okay, so specifically vegan, not just vegetarian, but like the vegan. The vegan option.
- [44:21]
A
So she did not RSVP that. She, like, when do you do. She didn't do that. She. She showed she rsvp.
- [44:26]
B
There were no options at Ellie's wedding.
- [44:30]
C
It was a little bit different. They presented a menu to you when you're at the table and you could choose from the menu, but the menu had all meat objects.
- [44:37]
B
And.
- [44:37]
C
And then if you wanted something vegetarian or vegan, you have to say, I'm vegetarian or I'm vegan.
- [44:42]
A
Oh, well, okay. I feel differently. If it's. If. If it's an RSVP and you RSVP for the chicken and you get it
- [44:47]
B
like, you know what?
- [44:48]
A
I want to get the vegan thing instead. I think that you can switch your food.
- [44:52]
B
You can't switch your food.
- [44:53]
A
Right? But if they're presenting with options, like, if there was a drought, if. If. If there was not enough available for how many people they're guesstimating, then they wouldn't offer you the option. But if they offer you the option, you don't want to eat meat. This is what it's in your prerogative
- [45:05]
B
to be like, they don't know, though, because they didn't. They didn't. I don't know if they even checked how many. They didn't give any dietary checks or anything beforehand. So we don't even know how many vegan.
- [45:13]
A
Which means. Which means they didn't have, like, a threshold.
- [45:16]
B
Maybe you did it for me or something.
- [45:17]
C
Yeah, we did. We did.
- [45:19]
A
Oh, yeah. See, so these. These people. I'm like, yeah, which. Which. The reason did that before was to guesstimate. You know what I mean? So if she had to do that and she didn't, then that's what I'm saying.
- [45:29]
B
If they. If they were checking, see how many vegans there were, they probably have a. They more than. Anyway, it was not a hard, fast rule. It's just something I do. It's. It's kind of like. It's kind of like a rule that I have is when you all order pizza, if you're not. For me, I don't eat the cheese pizza because a vegetarian might want the cheese pizza. I just eat the pizza with the meat on it, because I can do that. And I don't have any moral conundrum. I won't get sick, and it's not outside of my dietary restrictions. So I don't eat the cheese pizza because I. I feel like I don't. It's not like a hard and fast rule, but I. But I. But for me, I would like to leave that option. I think it's because I was vegan for so long and I was vegetarian for even longer that I know how it is to be there. And then, like, all the fudgeing options for you are just gone because someone was like, I just felt like eating the cheese pizza. Is. It is very hard when you are vegan or vegetarian, and that option is just getting ravaged.
- [46:21]
A
What's your favorite part of a wedding?
- [46:24]
B
I. You know, okay, I still don't love weddings. And. And. And I. And I also felt bad because Jacob's mom was like, all right, I know you don't love weddings. How was this one? I was like, I didn't dislike it, but, like, I don't love weddings. Like, I. Like I.
- [46:39]
A
Well, Rose is an avid listener of civil rivalry, so she probably heard you spit something.
- [46:42]
B
I know that Rose is an avid listener, but she does from time to time.
- [46:45]
A
So she probably tuned into one where you were. Where you were spitting your victory on wedding.
- [46:49]
B
I was very honest, and I said. I said, you know, I enjoy. I enjoy myself, which Is true. But you know, some people just love weddings. Yeah, that's not me. I don't love weddings.
- [47:02]
A
I'm not like, oh my God.
- [47:03]
B
Oh, some people fucking.
- [47:06]
A
If it was like a really close friend, like, I still. Those two weddings I went to with Andy, I didn't know those people. I met one of them once. I know them niggas. I know the one niggas. Like, I didn't know them. Like, I never. I met the second one. I had met her. We, we, we. We met once in New York with Andy.
- [47:25]
B
Not we.
- [47:26]
A
So I didn't know that. But I. Because a wedding is so beautiful, I still like tear it up, like at the ceremony part where these people are. Because I think it is a really beautiful thing to like do this like public display of your love and like quote unquote, commit to someone for the rest of your life, essentially. So I, I don't notice people, but I still get emotional. So that part of weddings I think is very beautiful, whether I knew these people clearly or not a lot. So I could imagine that being like a very close friend getting. I don't. None of my very close friends have gotten married. None of my. I've not ever been in a wedding. I've never participated in what I have when I was younger for the family members. But yeah, so I could imagine if you got married or if Patty got married or Kennedy or Mateo or Nick. I would be, I would be. I would feel very emotional because I'm like, this is so beautiful. Such a beautiful display of your love to this person.
- [48:15]
B
I didn't tear up at either wedding, really. Either one. I did not tear up at all. But also I also had cold ass. No emotional response when you told me about Sza. So apparently I'm a cold ass bitch. Give frost chills. And I mean, did you cry, Jacob, at either wedding? Ezra cried at my brother's wedding. And did you cry? You didn't cry to Ellie's wedding? But no, I did not. I did not tear up at all. But that doesn't mean I wasn't moved. I just didn't tear up. I was moved by Justin's wedding. It was very wonderful to see Justin so happy and very wonderful to see Lindsay, my sister in law, drag my sister's wedding.
- [49:02]
C
Drag it.
- [49:03]
B
Well, I had. I have less emotional connection to LA than I do Justin. Plot twist. But Eliana's wedding was very beautiful and it was very nice to sit so close to Jacob's father who cries at everything. I mean, Jacob's father will Cry. Will cry. I mean, I'm telling you, if you just like slow down the way you're talking and hold his hand and express gratitude and crack your voice a little, he literally will start crying. And I don't think that's an exaggeration. Dean Ritz be crying in these streets.
- [49:39]
A
Andy, Andy, Andy cries both wouldn't. He went to Andy definitely. Like, he like, not like boohoo. Inconsolable. But he was like, oh my God. When with me, I just got like a little misty.
- [49:50]
B
Dean Ritz was going through it.
- [49:53]
A
Like inconsolable.
- [49:55]
B
Not inconsolable, but like never like during the service. Very few moments when I looked over where he wasn't actively crying. Like Jacob and his mom had a thing where they literally had tissues on standby for Ellie, but mostly for Dean Ritz, which is actually very charming to see that. And dean was. Baby, OK. This like little 16 year old Turkish kid was like going off. He was dancing, like dancing, dancing. And then Dean was like, let me. He didn't say these words. He would never saw this. He was like, oh, I'm gonna show you how to dance, honey. So Dean hit the dance floor and started twirling because this is like a. Like a train. Ballet dancer. Dean was hitting the spins. Dean was getting low. Dean was popping up. Dean was juggling. Dean started juggling on the dance floor. And Dean was like, let me show you how it's done, honey. I'm doing multiple disciplines. I'm juggling. There's ballet, there's horror, bitch. There's all of this. Honey, your little. Your little young knees cannot compete with the years of experience. Sit down.
- [51:04]
A
So now with the music. Did they play top 40?
- [51:07]
B
Started juggling. I was like,
- [51:11]
A
did they stop? Did they play top 40 stuff too?
- [51:18]
B
There was a band playing a bunch of. I want to sound. To say this without sounding offensive. A band playing a bunch of like Jewish sounding songs. Like traditional. Like there was like a. Like Hava Nagila was playing and other songs that are like from Jewish. But it was a different version.
- [51:36]
A
It sounded.
- [51:37]
B
It sounded a little different. I actually might be able to put up some videos of. There were some great. Anyway. I actually won't put up videos of the way. But anyway, it was like. There was some. There was. And then. And then there was a. So the band left and then.
- [51:51]
A
I love a live band. I love a live band at a wedding. It is. I know it's very expensive, but a live band at a wedding, Bitch everything.
- [51:59]
B
And then only the horn section stayed and the horns. There was a trumpet and a trombone and they put. Played top 40, like top 40 throughout the like decades. They played top 40 and they were like just doing the horn section. They played like Rihanna's like Yellow Diamonds and this guy and they played like Staying Alive.
- [52:19]
C
So to clarify, there is a DJ who started playing music and then there were two live horn players who were punching it up with live horn performances for the horns in each song.
- [52:28]
A
Really quick as we're on the topic of this, are you. Have you seen his videos of the, of the, of the Miami Boys Jewish Choir?
- [52:33]
B
Baby B. I'm obsessed. It is so I can't tell. I can't tell if it's bullying or if it's just like celebrating like, like things going viral today. The line between, oh, bullying, like you can't tell.
- [52:49]
A
People are like making fun of it or like they genuinely like, enjoy.
- [52:52]
B
These boys are genuinely talented.
- [52:54]
A
They are very good. They're just singing down.
- [52:57]
B
But I think. But it's kind of like. But sometimes. But it is like this like Jewish boy group. Like they are like. So there is a part of this like there. I can see why this is funny because the way the videos are edited, it's giving 1990s, like we are the World concert. Like videos are cross fading and these
- [53:16]
A
like guys very stylized.
- [53:18]
B
Yeah. And these boys are like singing these crazy notes. So I'm. Part of me is like, I can't tell this, but they are very talented. They're really good.
- [53:25]
A
Well, a lot of. Some of them have like come forward. They're like, this was me in the video, like singing and like, are they not young anymore?
- [53:31]
B
Is there. Are they like grown ass men now?
- [53:33]
A
Yes, Bob. These are from the 90s.
- [53:35]
C
Yeah, it was like from the 2000s. They're all.
- [53:37]
A
Yeah, early 2000s. They're like, they're like growing. A lot of them, like 90% of them, 95, 98% of them don't do anything in music or art. So the ones that like, they're doctors, they're lawyers. They said, fuck that music and art shit. I'm going to doctors.
- [53:51]
B
Not naming stereotypical Jewish jobs. Monet. That is.
- [53:54]
A
I mean, this is literally what is really what they're talking about. They were like, yeah, I'm not a singer anymore. I'm a lawyer, I'm a doctor, not Monet.
- [54:00]
B
Doing the. Yay, Monet.
- [54:02]
C
So the video is from 2008 and they're all about 13 in 2008.
- [54:06]
A
Yeah. So wait, 2000.
- [54:08]
C
So they're like the same age as Me, they're all in their 30s right now.
- [54:11]
B
When they're like, they're accountants, they are doctors.
- [54:13]
A
Yeah. They said that music I'm doing, I'm, like, getting, like. And again. But also I can, like, looking back, like, being so talent. And again, I get it. Music and, like, the artist life is not for everyone. It is a hard thing. So a lot of people who really want to die for their art and, like, want to do it. It is a really big commitment, and it's not for a lot of people, especially when you can get a more lucrative job that can take care of you in a better way. I get it's not for everybody, but I cannot imagine, like, seeing videos of yourself where you're so talented, you're so good at what you do, and you're not pursuing that, like, art thing. Like, I'm like, yeah, but again, it's such a crap show. You never know how far it's going to take you, how you really go, and how you're really going to make money. So I get it.
- [54:52]
B
If somebody feels that way about you and cooking, someone's like, wow, one A's a really good cook.
- [54:55]
C
I have a question.
- [54:57]
B
And she just, like, isn't finishing up her cooking career, you know?
- [55:00]
A
You know, I did take a class when I was younger. My mom had me cooking classes. I learned. I mean, the first thing they told me I had to make was cinnamon rolls. They were allowed to make, like, pizza from scratch. And, like, I was really, for a moment, that I was really going to go down the cooking thing and do cooking. But I like it. It was the summer after that I left St. Lucia and went in the States and then just cooking stuff. Just, you know.
- [55:21]
C
But they're also all like, really young children. So doesn't, like, when your voice go through puberty, doesn't it change and become worse? So isn't it possible that they were all, like, on fire when they were 11, but now, like, lost it?
- [55:33]
A
When your voice drops and you and you are changing voice part because a lot of them are tenors and alto. I mean, are sopranos and altos. The voice is a little shit. But if you. If you are going. If you're having vocal lessons and you and you and you and you're pursuing, like, your voice, like, you know, just like how you take piano, you take violin. If you're working through that voice, change your voice, you just don't stop being able to learn how to sing. Your voice is just shifting, is dropping.
- [55:57]
B
I was covering my mouth because I realized I was. I was like, listening, but I was
- [56:00]
A
just like,
- [56:03]
B
dumb as hell.
- [56:05]
A
I was that kid, my mom.
- [56:08]
B
No one's shocked. Color. No one's shocked.
- [56:09]
A
I was always a kid, like. And my grandmother, we call him as. I said, Mammy, she'd be like, boy, I'm sorry that.
- [56:17]
B
I'm sorry as an American.
- [56:19]
A
Yeah, it doesn't have the same connotation.
- [56:21]
B
I know you said this. It is my knee jerk response to you calling your GR.
- [56:29]
A
Mammy. And she's like, boy, close your mouth. And then when I would. And then she would tell me, if you keep your mouth open. And I believe this, she was the same. When I told me to fight. This is why I never bit my fingernails. That if I was to bite my fingernails, it's actually slow poison for your body and you will die faster. So. And I never bit my fingernails after that. I was like. She was like, yes, look how long
- [56:51]
B
your nails are now.
- [56:52]
C
You really.
- [56:54]
A
She was like, every time you bite your fingernails, it's slow poison. So you're gonna. You're killing yourself early. I was like, really? She's like, yeah. She was also. What was I talking about? Oh, she's like, and if you keep your mouth open, flies are gonna fly in there and lay eggs and it's gonna eat your brain. You're gonna die. And then. But I would. That didn't stop me, honey.
- [57:10]
B
I was always like, okay, so Mammy's where you got your gaslighting from?
- [57:14]
A
Cause you are.
- [57:16]
B
This is wild. Is my grandmother, bitch. You told me to call her Mammy. What? What? What you talking, like, shut the fuck up. Y' all hear this?
- [57:26]
A
Y' all hear this? Y' all hear what this said?
- [57:28]
B
Y' all hear what this said? You don't want calling this woman, man. This is. Anyway I. Wait, we were talking about. Oh, my mother always said. My mother always said we would always have their mouth over. She'd always point out that they look dumb. So I. We just like. So I always like. Also, someone pointed this out. And I'm telling you. Yeah, what's that? Someone said this. I read this comment. And you can. I've said on the podcast before, you can never unsee this. You will never unsee this. Monet's mouth is never closed in any picture she takes. And I mean, I'm talking you. You will. You will scroll through. You will. I mean, there will be some. But you will be scrolling in like 99% of Monet's pictures.
- [58:13]
A
Okay, now you change it. Okay.
- [58:14]
B
If you Monet's Mouth be agape.
- [58:18]
A
Okay? That's how I do, Bob. You too.
- [58:21]
B
I'm not saying things wrong with it. That's. I'm not saying things wrong with it. I'm just saying it's.
- [58:24]
A
Damn.
- [58:25]
B
Listen, you feeling attacked has nothing to do with me.
- [58:27]
A
So your mouth. So your mouth just be. Just be closing all your pictures.
- [58:31]
B
No, my mouth is closed in, like, a lot of my pictures, though. If you look at me, look quite often in my mouth, it's closed in pictures.
- [58:37]
A
Yeah, well, good at clothes and pictures because they show. Because you sure don't stop fucking talking.
- [58:42]
B
Look at you try so hard to get that out. Look at you. Try so hard. You realize I keep laughing at that one guy.
- [58:48]
A
I can't find one with your mouth closed, Bob.
- [58:50]
B
I keep laughing at that one guy who comes for us and he starts calling you stuttering.
- [58:57]
A
Yeah, I have a speech impediment. Nigga, your mouth is always open too. What is your point, nigga?
- [59:03]
B
Money. This is not an attack on you. You feeling.
- [59:06]
A
Yes, it is. You're attacking me also.
- [59:08]
B
My mouth is completely closed in this picture. You're not searching craft. I can't see.
- [59:11]
A
Your camera's so blurry. We can't see. Your camera's blurry.
- [59:13]
B
Honey, my mouth is completely closed in that picture. My mouth is completely closed in this picture. You are really.
- [59:19]
A
Honey, you're blurry. Honey, you're blurry.
- [59:21]
B
My mouth is closed in this picture.
- [59:23]
A
Do you know it's not closing right now?
- [59:25]
B
And you know my mouth is closed in this picture.
- [59:28]
A
It's blurry.
- [59:31]
B
Bitch, my mouth is closing this picture. No, my mouth is wide open, but, yeah, my mouth closed.
- [59:36]
A
Okay, wait. It's not an attack. Before we close this. Just walk this thing out. So have you, you know, don't be trying to rush. We're almost at an hour anyway.
- [59:46]
B
Don't rush our listeners away. Don't rush our listeners away.
- [59:49]
A
So you once famously said on this podcast that you didn't want to get married. Yada, yada, yada. Now, after going to a couple weddings, how do you feel about marriage now? Is that something you see for yourself? Would you want to get married?
- [59:59]
B
I think I might say I don't want to have a wedding. I don't know if I said I don't want to get married.
- [60:02]
A
Okay, you don't want to have a wedding?
- [60:04]
C
Sure.
- [60:05]
A
Do you want to have a wedding now?
- [60:07]
B
I might have a wedding now. Um, it.
- [60:09]
A
It's your wedding. Oh, yeah. Your wedding tour, New York, Atlanta.
- [60:16]
B
It'd still be small and like how.
- [60:19]
A
What's small? How many guests?
- [60:22]
B
50 or less? 30? 20?
- [60:25]
A
Are you taking into account your, like for your side or your partners as well? Like all together?
- [60:31]
B
Yeah, all together. Like 50 people or less, Bob, 20.
- [60:34]
A
So 25. Only 25 people are invited for you to go to on your side of the wedding.
- [60:39]
B
But like, like, I'm not, it's not going to be a big thing. Like I'm probably going to do it in like a backyard. Like, I don't, I'm not going to go to like, like, like, like I was talking to someone at this wedding who was like, I'm getting married at the fucking Met stadium. I was like, what in the world?
- [60:52]
A
Were they legit? Like serious or. They're joking, dead ass.
- [60:54]
B
They were like, we were getting married at the fucking Met stadium.
- [60:57]
A
How much money does that cost her?
- [61:00]
C
Her dad is a lawyer.
- [61:04]
A
I mean, they don't plan on filling it out, surely. Bitch, no.
- [61:08]
C
In the state, there's like a room, a classy room that overlooks the field and it's in that room.
- [61:13]
A
Okay, okay, yeah, but Bob, your family alone is rolling 20 deep.
- [61:20]
B
But they also probably don't all want to come. Like, a lot of folks in my family have been married and I've been to only my brother's wedding. The only wedding in my family I've been to are my brothers.
- [61:29]
C
Both of them will say, when we went to Bob's brother's wedding, there were 13 people staying at his mom's house.
- [61:36]
A
Yeah, bitch.
- [61:37]
B
And my mom was like, why don't you and Ezra and Jacob stay here? I was like, this is ma. Sleep where? Sleep where? There was a bed in the dining room. I was like, this is wild. My mom, Jacob, very good. But like there is like I could buy my mom the fucking like Yankee Stadium. She would feel it. Like, no matter how many rooms she will fill up every room in the house. My mom is wild.
- [62:03]
A
I'm the opposite. I want nobody staying with me. Nobody don't stay with me. Everybody go find a place to stay. My mom is the same way though. My mom would have everyone stay by her. I'm not, I'm not at that same. Because when I have people stay by me, I feel a lot of pressure. Like I feel like I need to go shopping, fill up the house with snacks and drinks and food for them. I could buy like a, a blow up bed. Like, you know, in my place here in la, Duan and Arcia and their friends often come and stay here. I just feel pressure to make sure that Everyone has all the things they need.
- [62:33]
B
You're at home. You didn't invite me over.
- [62:36]
A
I believe it.
- [62:38]
B
Honestly, I do believe it.
- [62:39]
A
All right.
- [62:39]
B
Thanks, everyone. See y' all later.
- [62:40]
A
Yeah, Then don't forget it. Have a good night, y'.
- [62:43]
C
All.
- [62:44]
B
No, y' all have a good night. Cause I said it. Sa.