The One Where We Just Woke Up

Summary

Sibling Rivalry: "The One Where We Just Woke Up"

Date: February 9, 2022
Hosts: Bob the Drag Queen, Monét X Change
Episode Summary by Segment

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Overview

In this candid and comedic episode, Bob the Drag Queen and Monét X Change record an early-morning podcast—truly “just woke up”—resulting in a relaxed, unscripted dialogue. Topics swirl from sleep habits and dreams, to partner quirks, drag culture, games, childhood stories, and the realities of modern life as gay entertainers. Their chemistry is on fire, with rapid banter, teasing, and playful debates revealing both their similarities and their endearing differences.

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1. Waking Up & Morning Personalities

[01:33–03:24]

• Early start: Bob notes it’s “6:04 in the morning, Mountain time,” and teases Monet for being late. Both are groggy but ready to entertain.
• Are you a morning person?
  • Monét claims she is. Bob admits he's not, but can “wake up if need be.”
  • Bob: “I think I’m serving the children right now. This is psychological warfare.” (03:00)
  • They joke about keeping it quiet in the early morning, referencing Kennedy’s request.

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2. Sleep, Dreams, and Games

[03:24–06:36]

• Sleep talk: Discussion about the strangeness of mornings, mentioning dreams, night routines, and being disoriented upon waking.
• Game talk:
  • Bob and Monét try to play a round of “Anomia,” explaining the rules and mechanics in a silly, half-awake way.
  • Hilarious detour about brushing teeth with Invisalign—Bob recalling an online video:
    • “He had it in for five years…he was brushing the retainer.” (04:49)

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3. Quickfire Humor: Categories & Shady Banter

[06:37–09:00]

• Playing improv word games: They trade rapid-fire answers to prompts (vodka, cults, etc.), launch into tangents about Nazi cults, and debate what counts as a cult.
• Bob teases Monet for pulling Jacob's Jewishness into the mix, which leads to mock outrage and playful scandal.
  • “Monet just yells, ‘Well, Jacob’s a Jew!’ Oh my God!” – Bob (08:10)

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4. Language, Drag, and Identity

[09:01–12:35]

• More word games mixed with commentary on drag as a subculture.
• Playful argument about who named which villain first, drag superhero/villain identities, and gendered labels.
  • “Drag made me feel like a superhero.” – Monet (10:29)
  • “Oh, yeah, for sure. I’m nonbinary.” – Bob (10:38)
• Bob and Monet rib Jacob about his “Upper East Side Jew” impression—a running gag.

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5. Morning Beverages & Fancy Pronunciations

[14:35–16:26]

• Drink preferences: Bob wants Crystal Light, Monet wants Perrier (correcting Bob’s French pronunciation).
• Stories about mispronouncing “Le Pain Quotidien” and regional names (“Buena Vista”).
  • “My country eyes…let’s go to the Le Pain Cotitine.” – Bob (16:06)

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6. Altitude Woes: Makeup & Pressurized Products

[16:27–17:28]

• Bob explains how items like lash glue and makeup expand and sometimes explode due to high altitude at 9,000 feet.
  • “When you open the cap, it just shoots out at you…and it’s happening to all our makeup.” (16:57)
  • Advice for makeup-wearers about traveling to high altitudes.

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7. Sober Living & “Friend of Bill”

[19:03–20:53]

• Conversation takes a personal turn toward Bob’s sobriety and “Friend of Bill” (AA).
  • “There’s a kind of reckoning…you kind of get less time for just—something about getting sober.” – Bob (19:53)
  • Bob confesses to a fear of bad breath and recounts post-surgery mouth horror stories.

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8. Language Accents & Passwords

[22:48–24:39]

• Language accent anxiety: Monet feels obligated to pronounce Spanish words with the correct accent, sometimes confusing non-Spanish speakers.
• Bob notes regional name pronunciations and his experience learning Spanish later in life.
• Passwords: Who should have your passwords if you die? A brief, funny tangent about digital legacies.

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9. Social Circles, Matchmakers, and Membership Clubs

[25:24–29:39]

• Information about friends (Patty, Steve, Johnny) and community matchmakers, complete with gossip and character quirks.
• Fancy member-only clubs (like the Yale Club, Soho House), their exclusivity, and how neither host fits stereotypical club-goer profiles.
  • “You still have to pay for the hotel rooms, you still pay at the restaurant…” – Monet (28:03)

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10. Sleep Rituals, Cuddling, and Bedtime Habits

[43:20–46:35]

• Funny deep-dive into sleeping arrangements:
  • Bob and Jacob’s system: initial cuddle, then separate with a “mountain of pillows” and split comforters.
  • “Jacob just has a lot of—Jacob likes pillows…they’re like exploding, you can’t even fold them.” – Bob (44:11)
  • Monet sleeps on the corner of the bed, is a light sleeper, and both reminisce about old apartments and sharing (or not sharing) beds.

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11. Bedtimes & Childhood Negotiations

[47:38–52:08]

• Bob recalls his childhood campaign to get a later bedtime—with charts, data, and a presentation to his mom.
  • “This is my proposal to have a later bedtime. Hear me out…I asked all these kids at school…” – Bob (48:17)
• Monet and Bob compare bedtime experiences, discuss when those rules ended.

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12. Dreams, Sleep Science, and Nightmares

[34:14–43:20, 54:14–56:24]

• Science of dreaming: Number of nightly dreams, why dreams are forgotten.
• Bob introduces a theory: “Did you know that you don’t need your eyes to see in dreams?”
• Wet dreams, sleep talking, and embarrassing childhood bedwetting stories (with encouragement not to shame children for it).
  • “If you are a former bedwetter…try to help them out, do not tease them…” – Bob (56:09)

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13. Planes, Public Sleep & City Life

[57:22–61:54]

• Monét sleeps well on planes, Bob rarely does—discussion on Delta One and luxury travel.
• Remembering chaotic New York City apartments, noisy neighbors, and witnessing drug deals outside their windows.
  • “There were times it literally was like there’s someone in the room with me…it just felt like people were standing over my bed.” – Bob (58:54)
  • Monet educates Bob on the money/rock/drugs system of corner deals.

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14. Drugs & Youth Culture (with Euphoria Debate)

[62:08–72:12]

• Playful argument about teenage drug use, inspired by TV shows like Euphoria.
  • “Euphoria is not a documentary, Mon.” – Bob (72:02)
  • Monet maintains kids today do more than Bob thinks, based on her perspective and “lived experience.”
  • “Harry Potter—must be more wizards!” – Bob (72:48), poking fun at the logic.

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15. Random Memorable Moments

• “My mom used to always say, don’t be that proud of being wrong.” – Bob (63:48)
• Bob hilariously describes learning to clean wisdom teeth sockets (21:27), misadventures with frozen hands during Aspen snow interviews, and Monet’s fashion-over-function choices.
• Ongoing bickering about rules of games (like King of Tokyo), showing off their competitive friendship.

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Notable Quotes

• On morning personalities:

  • “You’re very disoriented in the morning.” – Monet (02:50)

• On being a superhero/villain in drag:

  • “Drag made me feel like a superhero. And you a super villain.” – Monet (10:29)
  • “Oh, yeah, for sure. I’m nonbinary.” – Bob (10:38)

• On sleep arrangements:

  • “Jacob just has a lot of—Jacob likes pillows…they’re like exploding, you can’t even fold them.” – Bob (44:11)

• On wet dreams:

  • “I had a puddle of cum. Jesus.” – Monet (39:00)

• On childhood bedwetting:

  • “Do not tease them, because, yeah, there is a lot of shame around.” – Bob (56:09)

• On Euphoria and youth drugs:

  • “Euphoria is not a documentary, Mon.” – Bob (72:02)
  • “You think the kids are also wizards from Harry Potter?” – Bob (72:48)

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Closing Thoughts

This episode is a quintessential Sibling Rivalry experience, bursting with laugh-out-loud moments, savage side-eyes, and genuine friendship. Bob and Monét’s vulnerability, banter, and realness make their stories and debates not only hilarious but often surprisingly relatable. If you want a taste of chaotic, early-morning drag excellence, this episode delivers.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Monet X Change]

Close your eyes.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Exhale.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Feel your body relax. And let go of whatever you're carrying today.

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

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[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

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[Monet X Change]

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

My name is Bob the Drag Queen. And I'm Monet x Change. And this is simply rivalry. Hey, Monet, we're doing a podcast. Hey, babe, it's time to do a podcast.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. Okay,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Please. Okay. I just want to point out that I am here and waiting for Monet to join. It is 6:04 in the morning, Mountain time. Mm.

[Monet X Change]

Hello.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

My name is Bob the Drag Queen. Oh, my.

[Monet X Change]

James.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And this is Siblings. Well, they gotta see us.

[Monet X Change]

No eyes. It was just.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Don't just thank God for the moon. Maybe it's not the moon at all. I hear Spike Lee shooting down the street.

[Monet X Change]

Hello.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How are you? The mornings, I'm great, typically. You're. Would you consider yourself a morning person?

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, for sure. I'm a morning person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're a morning person?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. You're not a morning person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm not. Not a morning person.

[Monet X Change]

I feel like that my eyes are good magic.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I think I'm. I think that I can wake up in the morning if. If need be.

[Monet X Change]

You're very disoriented in the morning.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think that I'm serving the children right now.

[Monet X Change]

You are?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is psychological warfare. Jacob is literally. This is some torture tactics. Jacob's never had a problem turning on his light as long as I've known him. And now it's like all of a sudden he doesn't know how to turn lights on.

[Monet X Change]

Well, we have to keep it down. Kennedy said to keep it down. Anyway, did you have any dreams last night?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, normally we do a little bit of talking before we get into be involved, so it's normal for us to bring her Bring her some anomia cards if you want to do a quick round. Okay, we'll start. We'll start with anomia bomb.

[Monet X Change]

Can't do this with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're awake. This is a gambit that Monet and Andy introduced me. Introduced me to.

[Monet X Change]

So what it is, is you flip a card, y'.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All.

[Monet X Change]

There's a. There's a. There's a symbol on the card. There are, like, six symbols.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The symbol doesn't matter now because we can't. We can't do the symbol. We're just gonna do the thing.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, right. Because

[Bob the Drag Queen]

that's what makes the games harder than. You have to match the symbol with someone else who has that same symbol, and then you have to give an example of what's on their card. So if their card says Mariah Carey song, then you have to be like, dream lover, but you have to be looking for the symbol. And then you look around, and then you read the card, and you're like, dream lover or hero or whatever.

[Monet X Change]

And then mine says, like, household supply.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. And you'll say, broom. And then the other hard part is that there'll be a car.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Have you seen that TikTok who's disoriented? My Invisalign is. Is. Is. Is popping. So you're saying you didn't brush your teeth?

[Monet X Change]

I do that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't brush your teeth. You've seen a video of the guy who didn't realize he could remove his Invisalign, his retainer, and he was like, he had it in for five years, and he was like, you can remove your retainer. And the guy was like, well, I guess he brushed his teeth, but he's not brushing his teeth. He's brushing the retainer or the Invisalign.

[Monet X Change]

The Invisalign. Or, like, a metal retainer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It looks like an Invisalign. I think it must be, like, some sort of Internet. There's no way it could be real.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I mean, how can that be real?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Retainer. Look at this. This is wild.

[Kennedy Davenport]

I just found out something kind of crazy, and I don't think I believe it, but Dane here is telling me that apparently after the orthodontist puts in your retainer, you can take it out at any time. There's no way. I've literally had this retainer in for what, five, six years? 2010. And he's telling me that you can take these out.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This has to be a bit, right? Yes. Wait until you see this one.

[Kennedy Davenport]

I don't even I'm scared my teeth will come out with it. Let me show you. I'll show you. No, you can't take your retainer out. Yeah, you can't watch. It's permanent. They put. There's glue in there. Everyone knows they come out if you pull my teeth out, I swear to God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Here it comes.

[Kennedy Davenport]

It's like glued in there. No. Oh, my God. Ew.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is so. We'll put it on the screen. Oh, my God.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Look how white my teeth are.

[Monet X Change]

Just a bit. They put stuff in there.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Are you kidding me?

[Monet X Change]

They put stuff in there. No way that's real. There's no way that's real.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right, I know.

[Monet X Change]

Me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. Okay, no shady flips.

[Monet X Change]

Okay?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You handsome. Oh, I couldn't even read it.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, handsome, but dumb.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right, let's. Let's do it this way. Devil's Prada.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Can you see the prompt after this?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, it was a movie with the devil in it. I saw this one already. That's not fair.

[Monet X Change]

Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I started to flip it.

[Monet X Change]

Good, good. Good for you. Food.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Damn, you're getting a screw up, son. One, two, three.

[Monet X Change]

That was a time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Vodka soda.

[Monet X Change]

You just said.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, it's vodka. Sorry.

[Monet X Change]

Vodka.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

One, two, three. Pbr.

[Monet X Change]

I don't drink domestic beers.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Neither do I. You used to never drink beer. You would never catch me drinking beer.

[Monet X Change]

1C3.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, gun I don't want you pointing

[Kennedy Davenport]

at

[Bob the Drag Queen]

is a criminal's accessory. Heaven's Gate.

[Monet X Change]

What's the Heaven's Gate?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Heaven's Gate's a cult.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, so we played this the other night, which y'. All. But we had a. We had a very big discussion.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who y' all saying was a cult?

[Monet X Change]

That the Nazis were a cult.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And me and Andrew were saying, they're not a cult.

[Monet X Change]

And you and Andy were like, no. And Jacob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I think Jacob. And then also I want to point out that Monet did. I thought was very strange. Was we're like. So we were like, it's a cult. Me. And they were like, world cults are religious, religion based, not political parties. Sometimes we call me but. And the Nazis were Christians, which is typical. Which is not considered a cult, but I think they're called. They're not considered one. And then Jacob goes, it's a call. And then Monet just yells, well, Jacob's a Jew. Oh, my God. I will say this. Me and Andy were both like, oh, my God.

[Monet X Change]

I literally raised the question of the podcast one time. I'm like, why does this sound so crazy? Someone is a Jew. Everyone's like, well, that's how you. There's nothing wrong with that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and Andy were aghast. We were like, oh, my God. There we go. All right, love. You're right. Okay. You're right, babes.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, y'.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

All.

[Monet X Change]

Jacob show host.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob shows Bobby British slang phrase. It's the connecting of the pieces that makes it hard for me.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. Normally we play and you pull a card.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Bob, just be staring like. It's the symbol connection. So I have to connect the symbol, then I have to say it. But then also there's this other card where you have to, like. It'll be like, equals squiggles. So then if you're playing against everyone with the equal sign and you're playing against everyone with a squiggle and my brain, that.

[Kennedy Davenport]

That.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's where my brain can't even. That was British. You can flip it over.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Squish. Amal. Ask him. No, it's an item. An item. You're not an item. You're a person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You can use it.

[Monet X Change]

By far. Drag, I guess. Drag is a subculture.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's no guessing.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, God. I said it first.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, we started saying the same time. I don't think Sweet finishes first.

[Monet X Change]

But you. She was a shorter person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think I said Fidel by the time you said Hitler.

[Monet X Change]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We both started saying Fidel and you said Hitler.

[Monet X Change]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who's keeping score? I'm still winning.

[Monet X Change]

No, they're keeping score.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You Poison Ivy. I don't identify.

[Monet X Change]

Female villain. You?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't identify as a female.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, Bob, there's a little bit. Jay put the clip from Good Morning America. I was like. I was like. And drag makes you a superhero. And I said, and you a super villain.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You said, oh, yeah, for sure.

[Monet X Change]

Drag made me feel like a superhero.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, for sure.

[Monet X Change]

And you a super villain.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, yeah, for sure. I'm nonbinary.

[Monet X Change]

You're a female villain.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm non. Binary.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Okay.

[Monet X Change]

Diana.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Princess Diana.

[Monet X Change]

No, I got it first. Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now she's waking up. The coffee's percolating.

[Monet X Change]

You.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No. Coronavirus. Okay, I can't be every answer. I'm a car crash, too. It's a risk to civilization. And I said, coronavirus. You're ridiculous. Twinks.

[Monet X Change]

Ebony.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wow. Wow. One category that is a porn category yelled you. Okay, let me give you that one. That's the Sex Noise. The Sex Pistols. That was a tie.

[Monet X Change]

That was a tie. A tie. A twi.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

A twie. No, just a Twa.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not getting a note now you Jewish.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That was British. I mean, there are British Jewish people, but I don't think it's right. They're saying it's a toy. Why is it Jewish?

[Monet X Change]

You sound like you're doing, like, Jacob's act. The one Jacob, like, oh, my goodness.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You think I sound like a. I sound like a jewel.

[Monet X Change]

When Jacob does his impersonation of an Upper east side Jew.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Mr. Mel Gibson for me.

[Monet X Change]

My God, you are so ridiculous. Jacob, can you please do the voice?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God, Ms. Streisand. It really is autographed. My sister would die. It's a toy.

[Monet X Change]

Yes, that's what I heard.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

1, 2, 3. Coming in my mouth.

[Monet X Change]

Slobbing dick.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Slobbing dick.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. Oral sex slang is not coming in my mouth.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's a slobbing dick.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. That is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But what your.

[Monet X Change]

Your first one, you just really went off the handle.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The first one I saw oral sex, and then I had to read the whole card.

[Monet X Change]

Those are the two ones that Bob was nailing every time. The first time it came about, I

[Bob the Drag Queen]

was like, get in my mouth.

[Kennedy Davenport]

You.

[Monet X Change]

You can come dominate the rope dot com.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We have four more. Here we go. Lightning round drinking, compulsive behavior and crust. No, I give that a tie. What you said Eminem commercial is this dude.

[Monet X Change]

How is it stupid?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because they're just kind of like the one where it's always like the goofy yellow one and then the other one. So one smart and one's dumb and they're just kind of like silicone.

[Monet X Change]

And also there's. There's the Vanessa Williams one. She's fair. It's a green.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think Shamwell commercial is a commercial. I think it is an infomercial. I don't think infomercials count. And it says stupid commercial.

[Monet X Change]

Infomercial. It literally has mercial in it. It's a type of commercial.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, so. So does commercial real estate. It doesn't make. Has Marshall. It's a. There's Marshall on it.

[Monet X Change]

It's a thing on TV to sell you stuff.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Marshall Mathers. It has marsh.

[Monet X Change]

Marshall. Ma, do you know all the words to you lose yourself?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You lose yourself in the. Mom.

[Monet X Change]

No, his arms are sweaty.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

His. His arms are sweaty. Wait, no, wait.

[Monet X Change]

Arms are sweaty.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think it starts with arms sweaty.

[Monet X Change]

I'm thinking.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm pretty sure arms are sweaty. Knees weak. Mom's spaghetti. This is. Makes sense. I don't think that's the lyric. Do you know the lyrics?

[Monet X Change]

Pussy. Wow. All right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I would like a crystal light or red Bull. Are we allowed to have any kind of beverages?

[Kennedy Davenport]

Water? No. Caffeine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think it's crystal light. Can you get crystal light? Do you have any? Yeah, it's that big pack of crystalite over there. But I think it's supposed to be for, like, a whole gallon and. What?

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah. Wow. That's like a whole.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's a little squeezy thing. I don't like those. No, I'll take one, Jacob. I'll take the little Mios.

[Monet X Change]

One of the Perriers. The Perriers.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And the. How do you pronounce it?

[Monet X Change]

Perrier.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's Perrier.

[Monet X Change]

I think also now you care about French. French pronunciation. Normally you're like, perrier, Perrier, but not like. It's the pronunciation when you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, well, you. You have a French background, so I took Spanish classes, but I've never taken a French class ever. I don't know a whole lot about French, but I don't need ice. I don't need any ice, baby. I just need the squeezy in the water. So what I ended. Oh, that's. Oh, my God. That's my baby. Oh, I love this one so much. You love someone so much. Get you. Get you a Jacob, what's your song about?

[Monet X Change]

French pronunciation.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh. So I moved to New York City. I had never heard of a. I was like the old bun pain. My country eyes. And there's also the tape. What is that?

[Monet X Change]

It's like a Le Pain Kotidien, girl.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, let's go to the Le Pain Cotitine. And people are looking at me like

[Monet X Change]

this country Le Peg Cotitien.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I want to say that when you're at. So we're at really high altitude right now.

[Monet X Change]

I never tried putting these kind of things in seltzer water. That's crazy. I never really thought about that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Make yourself like a diet soda, basically.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Good to know. I never thought about that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Crystal Light's better.

[Monet X Change]

Not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I paid advertising, but I prefer Crystal Light.

[Monet X Change]

Crystal Light needs to sponsor this podcast. How about that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What was. No, no. Altitude. So we're at 9,000ft above sea level, and when you. Everything you have that is, like, pressurized or. Or like, closed. Oh, it starts to pressurize. So if you put, like, just a bottle of soda when you rise up here, it doesn't explode, but it just kind of expands just a little bit. And it's happening to all of our makeup.

[Monet X Change]

Makeup.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, for example, this is my lash glue, and it's going to. Because I undid it. But, like, when we came, it was kind of swollen. And then when you open the cap, it just shoots out at you and it's. It's happening with all of our.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it's being like, Like. Like felt tip. Like black.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, yeah. So listen, all of you out there who wear makeup, if you are gonna bring a eyeliner, a liquid liner, when you open it, your shit will be gooey, girl, pussy, pussy, gushy girl.

[Monet X Change]

Let's take a break. And I gotta tell you, I have to ask you something. This is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How serious are I serious?

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right, we're back. Bitch.

[Monet X Change]

What is it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I hate people do that. Like, when people are like, I need to ask you something later. I need to ask you something later. Like, bitch, just start later. Now I'm like, the whole day, I'm like, what the fuck does this person need to ask me?

[Monet X Change]

Okay, that's. I noticed.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Just make sure you save time for me tonight, because I really, really need to ask you something really important. That is wild to me.

[Monet X Change]

I noticed so many similar behaviors between you and Annie, and I feel like it's like. And the connect. Well, both of y' all are. Y' all don't understand race. Y' all not supposed to Be race.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's not it, Monet.

[Monet X Change]

It's not. But a lot of Patty's the same way, too. Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and Patty are polar opposites.

[Monet X Change]

I know. But the thing that you guys are similar are a friend of Al.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Friend. A friend of Bill.

[Monet X Change]

Friend of Bill.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sorry. And, I mean, I guess I can't, you know, say that that's completely untrue. But I do think there's a part of being a friend of Bill. And if you. If the girls. If the girls who get it, get it and the girls who don't, don't you. I do think there is a kind of a reckoning in a. And a. I don't know, learning to respect yourself. And you kind of get less time for just something about getting sober. Everyone knows I'm sober. And your friend drives the. Your boyfriend drives the sober mobile.

[Monet X Change]

Now everyone be commenting about the bus. You are so silly.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I call the sober mobile

[Kennedy Davenport]

you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I guess maybe. And we were just talking last night about how I have meetings. People just kind of grumpy. Maybe you just kind of just start getting a little bit of that yourself, though.

[Monet X Change]

You got it before you went.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is my breath bad?

[Monet X Change]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. I kind of have a constant fear that my breath might be bad. And it's all because of that time that we went and my breath was bad because, girl, I say I'm talking rotted. Rotted. My breath was rot. I mean, like, it was. It was making me gag. So we'd said it. Talking about this more.

[Monet X Change]

We'll be at the airport and everyone would be hanging out here, and Bob would be like 40 yards on the other side. And we're like, what's wrong with Bob? And you'll be sitting there with your witchcraft.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was wearing a mask before anybody else, girl. I was masking.

[Monet X Change]

You were masking full black.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, Bob. Oh, my God.

[Monet X Change]

You just talk about jingles, look like a witch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You look like a witch sometimes. So what happened was I was wearing. This is actually right when I started wearing the dresses and I had the four dry sockets. And what I didn't realize was my. For some reason, my oral surgeon didn't tell me that when you get your wisdom teeth removed, food just makes its way into those pockets.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And you have to go buy a. Like, not a syringe. There's no needle. A syringe, but no needle.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And you have to take that and squirt it into the food out.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

To get the food out. I had food from literally a week. It literally. And I was like, how are y' all even dealing with this right now? Like, how.

[Monet X Change]

And then you come over to go.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, I'm gonna talk to him even. So then me and Kennedy. Cause I couldn't do it. Then Kennedy showed me how to do it, because I think she's had. I don't know why Kennedy. Kenny knows her. Do a lot of random stuff.

[Monet X Change]

I do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then. Which makes you. That's what makes you a greatest. We actually met someone here who I think might make a good.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, Rafael. Shout out to Raphael here at Aspen Snowmass.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He might be joining us from. We're here. Yeah, maybe. Anyway, so then Kennedy and I on the bus, then I was like. I felt so much better about myself.

[Monet X Change]

The thing I want to talk to you about is why you got.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're like, I forgot. You want to talk to me

[Monet X Change]

when you meet someone. Oh, no, you don't feel this way. We kind of talked about this before, but, like, when I say things in Spanish, I feel the need to say with an accent. And people. Spanish speakers appreciate that you should say with an accent. But people who aren't Spanish, they were like, why are you talking like that? I'm like, I'm not, like, doing a thing. I'm, like, saying it because that's how you're supposed to say it. Like, for example, Los Feliz in that neighborhood, people be like, los Feliz. And stuff like that. Ooh, I just spit everywhere. And then. But if you say that around someone who is not a Spanish speaker, they'd be like, why are you saying it like that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, okay, I can see certain words which are Spanish words, but when it comes to them being places or streets. For example, I grew up in Columbus, Georgia, and there's a street called Buena Vista Road.

[Monet X Change]

Buena Vista.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Buena Vista. I know that it's a Buena Vista, but growing up, I just. My whole life called it Buena Vista because everyone called it Buena Vista. So I still, to this day, we have. We have. There's. There's Buena streets in la. And I'm like, oh, let's go to Buena so and so. And Ezra, who is Mexican. My boyfriend's Mexican. Just cackles. And I'm like. Because he's heard me say buena before. But then I just say buena when I see my head connects. And I think also because before I took any Spanish classes, I was saying quesadilla. Quesadilla. I never said quesadilla. I never said that. But I always say quesadilla instead of quesadilla. I go, let me. Oh, let me get the quesadilla. Or. Or tacos. And when you go to Mexico, they say taco instead of tacos. So I. So I think the things that I was. That were already in my lexicon.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Before.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Learning Spanish.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't have learned Spanish before taking Spanish classes. I've been told that my pronunciation is actually pretty good. It looks so comfortable. This guy at the airport was like, oh, my God, your Spanish is great. And I was like, all right, sir, I'm trying to get my parents. Do you know my computer password?

[Kennedy Davenport]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel like you. If you die, who has all your passwords?

[Monet X Change]

No one.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What? No. If you die, so what happens if you die?

[Monet X Change]

What do y' all need to know?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We need to settle your affairs. We need to unlock your August. Who has your August? I have the August.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but what about. Imagine if I died in my house and no one knew? That's. To me. That's so sad.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How would people not know?

[Monet X Change]

I mean, for a while, I think.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, your calendar. You have a calendar. And as soon as you miss a gig, people probably call. David will probably call me, and then I'd be like, I don't. Did you know I asked Patty the other day this. In the. In the theater. I said, patty, on a scale of 0 to 10, 10 being like, absolutely, and 0 being under no circumstances, how close are you to move into la?

[Monet X Change]

What did he say?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Eight?

[Monet X Change]

Moving to la?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He said. He did not say. He said. He said he's at an 8.

[Monet X Change]

So with 0 being like, absolutely not,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

10 being 10 being like, I'm there tomorrow. He said he's at an eight. Milky.

[Monet X Change]

The dive.

[Kennedy Davenport]

What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, he did, girl. So I'm like, so, you know, all we gotta do tip the scale is just get Patty a man. Oh, girl.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Bitch.

[Monet X Change]

If Patty was at zero to go off, my man Patty would be there overnight.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We can find Patty a sugar daddy in la.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, for sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm talking to Steve Warren and some of his, like, lawyer friends.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, you're really close to Steve,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

so I love Steve Warren. Like, I'm sure Steve is the.

[Monet X Change]

Is the lawyer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Steve's the lawyer.

[Monet X Change]

The lawyer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Right. He has more hair than we do.

[Monet X Change]

Does he?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, a little bit. Like, is he bald?

[Monet X Change]

But should he. Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Steve listens to our fuck.

[Monet X Change]

I love Steve.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, Steve's a lawyer, bitch.

[Monet X Change]

I've been balding since I was 20

[Bob the Drag Queen]

years old, before Steve was ever balding. Steve's a lawyer and Johnny's the Photographer. Right. And artistic director.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But anyway, he was. We trying. Me and him were also trying to hook Mateo up.

[Monet X Change]

With whom? Like another rich lawyer?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So Steve. Steve has this lady who. She's a matchmaker, but she does it for free. She doesn't charge anyone. She just goes around matchmaking.

[Monet X Change]

Interesting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like. Like, he met her at the gym, and then he was.

[Monet X Change]

I feel like Steve works at one of them fancy gyms.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They have a gym in their home.

[Monet X Change]

Work.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But he also goes to the gym, too, because this lady was there, and I'm sure she wouldn't just show herself. But so. And she walked up to him. Someone was like, you need to meet. But she was too aggressive for him at first. She was like, are you a top or you a bottom? Steve was like, oh, my God. He was like, this is not gonna work. And then someone's like, no, Steve, just do it. Whatever she says, just answer all of her questions. But I'm telling you, this woman finds people like love. So Steve was like, okay. So then Steve gave her the information she needed, and then she. She matched him with Johnny.

[Monet X Change]

Really?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And Steve was like. She was. He was like, she's right. Just tell her what she needs. What she needs to know. Really. She's like this, like. Or maybe she's Swedish or Dutch or something.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, that sounds like. If you're that direct.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I met her. I met her at the cabanas.

[Monet X Change]

And how long has Stephen and Johnny been together?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think, like, three years, maybe work. I met her at the. I met her at the Weho Cabanas, which is like this, like, private club, but it's really just a restaurant. Well, it seemed like it's just a restaurant. I got invited from Steven, and I'm not a member of this club. But you have to apply to be a member.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah. That's how all these members. And then you pay like a dues.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then you also go and you

[Monet X Change]

have to pay, and you have to pay. That's what. That's. Understand, like, we talk about this with the Yale Club. I. It blew my mind. People pay, like, thousands of dollars to be a member of the Yale Club. And all you do is just get to be a member. You still have to pay for the hotel rooms. You still pay at the restaurant. I'm like, what is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When you're there, you can't. You can't use cell phones, right?

[Monet X Change]

You can't use cell phones.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, they. When you get home, you can't take them through. They. They put a sticker over your camera.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, they ended at the Yale Club.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And really? And it's very high. It's very Hollywood. Like, they're like famous. I think I saw Charlie's there on there work and what else about this place? And like, Steve got rejected the first time he applied.

[Monet X Change]

Interesting. Why?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know.

[Monet X Change]

Remember when in mid pandemic. I feel comfortable saying the name because I don't care. A company wanted to give us memberships, I think for five years, and all we had to do was do a podcast. Remember this? The cell phone house. And then we're getting. I remember that. Yes. They wanted us to do a podcast. They're like, why we not do it? Because we were like. And then we're like, bitch, we don't wanted to. We. Because we. Because we. We aren't people who go to Soho Houses and stuff like that. And then we're like, I'm not interested.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Performed at the so house one time.

[Monet X Change]

I have to. The one on 14th Street.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I, I.

[Monet X Change]

You and Thorgy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah, we did bingo. Yeah, she was really hot about it because I was like. I was like the official bingo person. And they called her my assistant,

[Monet X Change]

But

[Bob the Drag Queen]

she was hot like fish grease.

[Monet X Change]

This was like, I wonder.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is before Drag Race. This is before Drag Race. And then I. Because I had just come off the cruise and I came.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, the cruise or actual cruise or drag race?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Cruise. No, the actual cruise.

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And do you remember that one time that I came off the cruise and I was like, hungry and skinny and tired? Do you remember this? I was like, for some reason on this cruise, I got really skinny. I don't know what was going on. Which is crazy because all I did, seven days, I was doing a cruise.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Eat.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I was on this. I was like, I think I might got sick. Cruises make you sick.

[Monet X Change]

And you like. But you love them. You like, the food's great. It's a good time. You should do it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I love them. But you were like, I heard the food was disgusting, but also you're the same bitch. You be gobbling down first class food like it's not a hungry man meal.

[Monet X Change]

And I said, gobble down.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I said, I've sat next to you.

[Monet X Change]

We played this game called King of Tokyo. And Bob gets. You become a different person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know what is wrong with me, but you get so aggressive. This is while bullying everybody. Like, bullying Andy.

[Monet X Change]

Someone just picks up the card. I'm like, yeah, pick up that card. You about to go down.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If y' all play King of Tokyo, let Me know me and Monet want to make our own little version of it.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, I also tweeted out last night about that card that everyone was questioning. And I want to see what the card. There was a card. Tentacles.

[Monet X Change]

A parasite. Tentacles.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And let's see what the Internet said. And I know this is very niche. This is very niche content. Oh, I just. Bar came yesterday. Yeah. Okay.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

You and Andy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Next time I hit with Andy.

[Monet X Change]

You and Andy are tied. He could win right now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I didn't forget, actually. Wait.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, no. And oh, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't forget about you, Andy. It's a simple game.

[Monet X Change]

Look at you. Look at yourself.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's so easy. We'll put the video in here, y'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

All.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I see it. So, all right, so I asked everyone last so that. Let me explain the card. Is this too niche?

[Monet X Change]

It might be a little too nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We do need some.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So there's a card called Parasitic Tentacles.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This means that everyone has, like, these power cards that have extra powers. And this card says you can buy power cards from other monsters. Pay them the. The money. The cost of the money.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, again, it says you can buy power cards from other monsters. Pay them the money.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I think that means. If it means I can, that means I am literally capable of it. I can't. It didn't say I may. See, that's the difference. And I say you may buy cards as you can. I have the power to buy anyone's card off of them. And Monet thinks. And I think that Emonat thinks that they can say no.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I think that, yes, you can buy them, but they have the. But they can say no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now, you know the difference between you may buy a card and you can't buy a car.

[Monet X Change]

But there are many. We know this. There are many cards in this deck that are very ambiguous. So when I say when it says you can buy, I think that's saying, hey, Jacob, I want to buy this card from you. And Jacob can say no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So anyway, so our most popular. We got responses. Yes, it is like a steel card. I declare my abandoned on two other games. But the contact tabs is level plus. I don't know. Another yes. Another yes. And of course it says can. So I would say it's optional, as one person is optional. It sure looks like that way to me. There's a yes. For those asking. It's from a game called King of Tokyo. The answer to the original poster is the yet to see the publishers. There's no other game yet.

[Monet X Change]

So hold on the publishers have many people have posed this question and the publishers have not responded. No one knows.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, they must. Yes, you have to.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's where the card. That's what the card says. Thank you. RX B. These names. Anyway, so, long story short, I think that the answer is. Is A.

[Monet X Change]

You.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You can't. Because it says I can. We'll talk more about when we get back. That's what I want to talk to you about when we get back.

[Monet X Change]

So my. But my thing is that it gives you too much power. Especially that car. Cost you five energies, Mitch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay.

[Monet X Change]

I can see four even less. I was like, if it was maybe. I could see if it was maybe like eight. Because that gives you a lot of power in the game.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But also, what a shit card then. But I'm saying the last thing I say on it is, you can and you may. You may means you have per. You have permission to buy cars from people from the game. And you can means you are capable. So when I say you can walk, that doesn't mean that someone can negate your ability to walk.

[Monet X Change]

But also, if I can walk, I can choose not to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. So it's like you can choose not to walk. I get to choose to walk. I can walk. It has nothing to do with you.

[Monet X Change]

And the reason why I say you can because. What's my point?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, you just got.

[Monet X Change]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This antibiotics all over again.

[Monet X Change]

No, no, no. You can. You can buy the thing. Oh, and my point was saying you can because if you asked me to and I forgot what my point was. It's early in the morning. Antibiotics, but I said it yesterday.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did you have a dream last night?

[Monet X Change]

No, I don't really dream. Do you? I rarely dream. Rarely. And when I do, I never remember them.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I dream often. Not terribly often, but maybe like once or twice a month. And I only remember my dreams when I wake up in the middle of a dream.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Oh.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't. Like, I've never been able to resolve a dream. Like, I know people who were like, I had like, two dreams last night. Which, by the way, we all have dreams. You have a dream. Everyone has dreams every night.

[Monet X Change]

Everyone has dreams.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, apparently there's.

[Monet X Change]

Is that a fact?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's a study that says that most people have like nine dreams a night.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Night.

[Monet X Change]

That's crazy. I don't think that's right. You Google that information.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob, this really says we must have like nine dreams a night. But you can't. You just can't remember most of them. And I can only remember dreams that I wake up in the middle of. And this is also another thing. If you don't start like writing or typing it right away, like if you wake up and start talking about it,

[Monet X Change]

oh, you forget about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It would just. It just slowly fades away.

[Monet X Change]

Why is that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't.

[Monet X Change]

The brain is such a powerful tool, you know, it's a very powerful organ.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What is happening?

[Monet X Change]

Four to six every night. Everyone 46. Everyone, everyone has four to six dreams every night.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

46. No. Yeah. Anyway, 426. There's also another theory. Did you know that like, you actually don't need your eyes to see?

[Monet X Change]

That doesn't make any sense.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, I know. I didn't think it makes sense either, but it actually makes perfect sense when you think about it. You can see, literally see without your eyes.

[Monet X Change]

See. Like you can see things how? Okay, my eyes are closed.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, so here's. It is. So some blind people use sonar to bounce off. To like bounce things off and they'll be able to see things. And the way.

[Monet X Change]

What is that seeing?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It is seeing.

[Monet X Change]

Like by definition of seeing, is it seeing. Seeing things from your eyebrows?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It is actually seeing because when you're sleeping, your eyes are closed, but in your dreams you are actually seeing things.

[Monet X Change]

Like you, literally, you're seeing memories though. You're seeing, you're seeing, but you see them like you, like you can. You can't dream of things that you've never. Like everything your brain is putting together, seeing. The definition of seeing is because. Since what the action of seeing what? Not the action of seeing someone or something. Bitch. What does seeing mean? Vision, maybe? No, but vision is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You can't say vision can you see without eyes and. No, no, no eyes or even special photosynthesis cells are necessary. But scientists have discovered in recent decades in that many animals, including human beings, do have specialized light detecting molecules in unexpected places outside of the eyes.

[Monet X Change]

This is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm just reading.

[Monet X Change]

I know, I know. We're all processing it together.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Saying like, when you, when you're dreaming, you are seeing that stuff. Like you're like you're using the part of your brain that lets you see things even without your eyes actually. Because like when you're in a dream, it doesn't look foggy, it doesn't look your eyes closed. You are like, act like everything is vivid, bright and you're actually seeing it.

[Monet X Change]

But your brain is piecing together memories of things that you have seen. So it's not like. So you're not like seeing something you're seeing. Your brain is just basically making a movie.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But it's. I think they're saying. I think what they're saying is the part it triggers, the part of your brain that allows you to see. And it's doing it without the eyes. Maybe it's almost like a phantom pain or something. But this website, scientificamerican.com has a whole article. Has a whole article about seeing and how. How to see without eyes. Meet the ey man who can see vision without eyes. The new optical optic Selena or whatever.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's tech. That's some. That, That's. That's some Terminator they're trying to build up.

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, there it is.

[Monet X Change]

Have you had sex dreams? Like wet dreams?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've had wet dreams, and the new wet dreams don't necessarily correlate to sex dreams.

[Monet X Change]

Isn't a wet dream a sex dream?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, not like.

[Monet X Change]

Not like getting wet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I think a wet dream is when you come a little bit it and you wake up and you're in.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I have.

[Monet X Change]

I had a puddle of cum. Jesus.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know. I don't know. Those drops you'd be doing.

[Monet X Change]

Not a puddle of gum, but Jacob,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob be getting blasted.

[Monet X Change]

I've only maybe had two. I only remember having ever like maybe three wet dreams in my whole life.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, wet dreams are. Are typically. Not exclusively, but typically for like people who are going through puberty. Yeah, typically people with. With penises who are going through puberty.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's the thing. Can. Do people with vaginas have wet dreams?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think. I don't think it's. I mean, you can probably get. Your pussy can probably get wet while you're sleeping, but I don't think it's called a wet dream. I think the wet. I think that the term wet dream is reserved for amab. People who are in tip of this when they're going through puberty. Oh, it says they sure can work wet dreams.

[Monet X Change]

This is by greatest.com.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

so I guess it is considered a wet dream as well. Yeah. Maybe it's just coming here. Maybe. Is it when they come about.

[Monet X Change]

Whatever I'm coming.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It doesn't feel like coming. It just feels.

[Monet X Change]

It doesn't feel like you're peeing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It feels like you woke up.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sticky, sticky piss.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it's not. It's definitely not the same texture and consistency as normal calm.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So you think that. Oh, so you think when people penis come as normal people vagina.

[Monet X Change]

No, I said for me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, you think. Oh, you're. What do you mean? It's not the same?

[Monet X Change]

It's not like. Like when you, like, have sex and you come. That's a different consistency than having a wet drink.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why do you do your hands like this? Is that how you jack off? It's so lazy. Like you don't grab the consistency? No, that was. You were jacking off. You don't grab that motherfucker.

[Monet X Change]

My God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Have you seen people who do this? Who, like. Have you seen people just take two hands?

[Monet X Change]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And they just. I've seen it and they literally. It's like. How would you ever be able to come like that?

[Monet X Change]

Well, some people bop. Some people have different.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know, but you've seen this before.

[Monet X Change]

I've not seen it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Have you ever been porn or anything?

[Monet X Change]

I've never seen it. It just be.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Just barely.

[Monet X Change]

Like just.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, barely touching their junk. And I've seen people who be going to town beating their shit up.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I used to hook up with.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I still cannot believe that you come into Condo. That is crazy.

[Monet X Change]

Not all the time. When I was. Especially when I was younger to avoid like, cleanup and my mom finding like. Like a crusty sock or something.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Toilet or the bathtub.

[Monet X Change]

Are you always in the bathroom when you. When you're masturbating?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Every time I masturbated, Yes, I was. I never. I never masturbated in my bed until I was an adult. And then like, still, like, I was probably in my late twenties when I. When I start. When I stopped masturbating in the bathroom.

[Monet X Change]

Really?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

Old habits die hard, huh?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Old habits.

[Monet X Change]

Honey, do you have nightmares often?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not often, but yeah, I have had nightmares before.

[Monet X Change]

Oh. When I have like a. And every time I have a nightmare, it feels so fucking real, like. And I feel like the thing has happened. I dreamt of me driving off a cliff and me being the sole survivor in the car. And it's me trying to find my way back to civilization from ancient Mesopotamia or whatever the fuck I am. And I'm literally in my mind. I'm like, oh, my God, I can't believe I just had this car crash. How am I ever gonna. It's so real. My nightmares are always very vivid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've had nightmares that were actually more like, less graphic. But I had this nightmare one time, and this is probably based off some trauma that I have in my life. But I have this dream that Kennedy told everyone.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, I remember this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Told everyone that I hit her. And I was like, that's not. That's not true. And she was just. She was just flat out lying. And everyone believes her, and everyone believed her. She was like, bob hit me. And I was like, that is just a complete falsehood. And no one in my life, not a single person, believed me.

[Monet X Change]

And did it feel very vivid? Like, you're like. It's actually very.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I woke up when I fired. I was about to fire that bitch. That didn't. That. That did not happen. But I think that kind of goes back to. And I think I talked about Amy. Amy Wolf. I hate her now. Amy Wolf, my. My college professor who told everyone that I threatened to beat her up. She told everyone, and they all believed her. Except the people who were in the class, who were like. Some of them. Like, that didn't happen. But they didn't. The testimonials of 30 other people was not enough, apparently, to resolve my name or get me my college credits back.

[Monet X Change]

When you and Jacob sleep in the same bed, do y' all sleep, like, cuddle? Do y' all sleep touching?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Typically speaking, Jacob and I cuddle for roughly 15, 20 minutes, maybe less sometimes. And Ben, Jacob goes. Every time he goes. He's on me. He goes, all right, I'm gonna go to bed now. And then he rolls over, creates a mountain of pillows between us, and then sleeps.

[Monet X Change]

Why the pillows between?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know. Jacob just has a lot of. Jacob likes pillows. We have a lot. And these pillows that we have on our bed are. They're. They're, like, overstuffed. It's like. They're, like, exploding. So you can't, like. You can't fold the pillows in half. I love pillow. You can. You know, instead of stacking two pillows, I usually take one pillow and fold it. Yeah, I don't know why I do that, but Jacob bought these. I mean, completely oversized. You can't even fold them. These are bricks, basically. And we also have two completely separate sheets. We do not share sheets. There's a sheet for Jacob, and there's a sheet for.

[Monet X Change]

I guess that makes sense.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob has a comforter and I have a comforter.

[Monet X Change]

Got it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So that we don't tug at the comforter, which. I'm trying to implement that with me and Ezra as well, but Ezra wants to share a sheet. I'm like, it's just. It's just easier if we. And also the sheet that made Ezra's place is smaller because we have a smaller bed.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And one of us just. Inevitably, one of us just ends up

[Monet X Change]

with a sheet that I. That was.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now I'm not. I'm not. I am now not accustomed to sharing.

[Monet X Change]

And he's a reckless sleeper. I would like. We.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We.

[Monet X Change]

If we'll like cuddle for maybe, maybe two minutes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm like, you also run hot.

[Monet X Change]

I run hot. And then. But we'll sleep and. But he always like, I. I sleep on the edge of it when I want to sleep by myself. When I sleep with someone, I sleep like if this is the bed, I'm like right here on the corner.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me too.

[Monet X Change]

I'm like right there. And I don't. I don't really, really move around in my sleep. I'm also a very light sleeper. Are you a light sleeper?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No.

[Monet X Change]

Okay. You're not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, I'm not like a heavy.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, no. Bob. I would come into your apartment at 945Amsterdam and fully live my whole life and you would have no idea I was there.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you think I'm a light super baby or a heavy sleeper? Really?

[Monet X Change]

You are a heavy sleeper, girl.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sometimes I'd be awake. I'd just be choosing not to say nothing, cuz Jacob is a Jacob with thunder clumps around the house. Jacob be walking like he's in the army. I'd be like, is this nigga wearing combat boots? What's going on up there?

[Monet X Change]

But Andy will. He will be on his side and he would every time just be. I mean, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Somehow Jacob also just keeps migrating across the bed. And so we used to sleep in a full size bed in New York City or. Yeah, a full size bed. And I mean, I am hugging the corner.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wobbling. And you guys have a really tall bed. My bed was like four, three, four

[Monet X Change]

feet off the ground.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And Jacob just keeps migrating over. And then I would. I would scoot over and then he just would. But not necessarily touching. Touching me. But he just. He just always ends up with like a. A lot of space on his side. And I would be like, Jacob, look at, look at how much space. Because he doesn't Want to cuddle. He just. He just somehow just keeps the gravitational pull of me, I think.

[Monet X Change]

I think it's cute, though. I don't. I don't. I don't. I'm not that way. You know what? It was cute.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The beginning. We figured out a system. I think. I think maybe the barricade is to keep Jacob from rolling into my side of the bed. But it was just crazy how he just kept. And then we have a king size bed. I'm like, and you only got a

[Monet X Change]

king size bed once? I got one because you didn't. You did not have one before me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't have space.

[Monet X Change]

Yes, you did.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

In my New York City apartment, Bob, you have. Absolutely not, Monet. Absolutely not. My bedrooms in New York City were very small. One of them was longer, but it wasn't very wide. Even if it was a bed, there was a desk and then the radiator right next to it.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, the radios and shit.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

New York City.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was a great apartment. It was a big apartment anyway.

[Monet X Change]

It was a good apartment.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So now we have this king's hat bed. I'm just thinking to myself, like, Jacob, if you just look at all the space. I know. I just don't know why you want to be on this. Why you want to be on this half the bed. I'm trying to make that make sense. Typically. That's also because I think I spent so many years not sharing the bed. And also, sometimes Jacob does as a joke. Well, I don't know if it's a joke. Well, no, actually, we figured it out. Now if I go to sleep after him, he's typically on his side of the bed.

[Monet X Change]

He's typically on his side.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

His own side. The manifest destiny has stopped happening.

[Monet X Change]

Ooh, what's up with these? Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did you have a bedtime growing up? Yes. Now we need to have Martha Caldwell back on the podcast for this because this is actually an iconic.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

I can't remember.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is an iconic, like, Bob the Drag Queen Caldwell moment. This is very me. So when I was in kindergarten back, it was 8 o' clock in kindergarten.

[Monet X Change]

8 o'.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

Clock.

[Monet X Change]

That is late for ADA for kindergarten.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What time are you Kindergarten, bitch.

[Monet X Change]

You're like, what, six years old?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Five.

[Monet X Change]

Five. Yeah, I'm.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not weird to see a child awake at 8:00'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Clock.

[Monet X Change]

I guess it's not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Or like, if you see a kid at 7 o', clock, it's not like.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I guess that's not. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So my bedtime was 8 o' clock. And then I remember going to school and asking everyone what their bedtime was. And everyone was like, nine o'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Clock.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, nine what? So then I came home and then my mom used to have these, like. Imagine a note, like a. Like a memo pad, but huge. The one that kind of goes on the easel. She used to be at work or something. So then I went and I found my mom's memo pad. And then I collected all my data and I did this presentation. And I was like. And I was going through all this. This stuff. Me and Jacob, me and Justin were there. And Justin was really just kind of hanging out. I was all talking. I was like, just, we're gonna get a. We're gonna get ourselves an 8:30 bedtime. Mark my words. So I walked. I was like. I was like, mom, I want to talk to you after the break. I think just wanted. Please just let me tell you. So I sat my mom down and she's probably just. She's probably just like laughing her ass off because it's. This little chubby kid is like, okay. So I just want you to know this is my. Sorry, flip the thing. I'm like, this is my proposal to have a later bedtime. Hear me out. And I'm like, I asked all these kids at school and most of the kids, I don't think I knew percentage. I was like, most of the kids at school said their bedtime is 9O'. Clock, which me and Justin both agree is way too late. 9 o' clock is a very late bedtime, right? And he's like, very late. Now I get it.

[Monet X Change]

So very.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You and me and Justin are just asking for 8:30. Now. The thing is just. And I want 30 minutes less than the average American child is getting. We are accepting a lower rate basically so that we can have a later bedtime. Then we can reevaluate after a couple of months. And if it feels appropriate to you,

[Monet X Change]

then we can keep this time or

[Bob the Drag Queen]

maybe we can move Forward until like 9:00'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Clock.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then after watching my whole presentation, my mom was like, all right, you can go to bed at 8:30.

[Monet X Change]

My mom like, no, take your ass to bed now. They say just for that, go to bed now. At 6 o'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Clock.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Go to bed, go to bed, wake. But I think she was just. She was probably. I mean.

[Monet X Change]

And she's a breastfeeding.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

As a parent, I'd be like. Like, I would just be laughing at this kid. This shit would be so funny. Oh, doing a PowerPoint on why this kid.

[Monet X Change]

If you have a kid from your own DNA, you're fully gonna manifest that into your life.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't wanna. I honestly don't want a kid like me as a kid. My mom famously said I was born first. My brother would have never been born first. I was a hard child to raise. And I do not. I would not wanna. I would not want to. I would. I wouldn't wanna raise me. This is message. Look crazy as hell,

[Monet X Change]

Jacob.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Last night

[Monet X Change]

I did not. I guess I. I had bedtimes. I don't remember. My mom was very adamant about a bedtime though.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But after.

[Monet X Change]

I don't want to stop near middle

[Bob the Drag Queen]

school, I no longer had bad times. Like, I think seventh grade is when I stopped having a bad time. I can go to bed literally whenever I want.

[Monet X Change]

Really?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. My mom would usually go to sleep before me. Really?

[Monet X Change]

Oh, no. I had to go to even high school, my bed. I mean, you had a bedtime in high school? No, I guess I think I did. Maybe it wasn't bedtime, but I definitely couldn't be up until like one o' clock in the morning fucking around.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're like, absolutely, I can be uploaded anytime I want. And in the summer we didn't have a bedtime.

[Monet X Change]

You just said you don't have a bedtime in the school year.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, I mean even as, even as a. Even as like a child.

[Monet X Change]

Child.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

In the summer, there was no bedtime. I don't remember when I was in school. I can just go to sleep literally whenever I want it. And as seventh grade and up, I no longer have bad times.

[Monet X Change]

Do you talk in your sleep?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Apparently.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, you can't stop talking when you're awake. I can't imagine when you asleep. You gotta get it out, girl. Like full conversation.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Will you give your kids bedtime?

[Monet X Change]

Absolutely. Having a bedtime for sure. Absolutely.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What's it gonna be?

[Monet X Change]

I think, I think elementary school is gonna be 8 o', clock, middle school 10, and then high school. We can talk about it later.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've heard that getting kids to bed is like one of the hardest parts of parenting.

[Monet X Change]

Getting your kids to bed.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like getting young kids to just go to bed is like one of the hardest parts of parenting.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, I could imagine. Especially when they're not tired. I'm like, bitch. Because if you go to bed at seven o'. Clock. No, guess that's 12 hours your brain. Don't young people need that?

[Kennedy Davenport]

That.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, but also the thing is kids, young kids often take sleep, take naps throughout the day. So, you know, you ever take a nap on a plane and then you get to your destination and you can't sleep now? Yeah, it's kind of like that. But I've heard there are entire books on, like, just how to get your kids to go to sleep.

[Monet X Change]

There's books on everything. There's books on everything. There's books on how to. How to properly mix your meal to make it taste.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's not a book on that.

[Monet X Change]

What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There are no books on that.

[Monet X Change]

I bet you there is. If y' all can find a book on how to properly integrate.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

To make sure me with not.

[Monet X Change]

Not specifically meal, but crystal.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like some sort of an artificial. Artificial sweetener. Sweetener.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. I was gonna say something really good and I forgot you. Can you let me do what I'm doing?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I wait until you were done, then I started talking.

[Monet X Change]

What was my thing, Bob?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You told me to shut the up when your kids are gonna go to bed. Kindergarten, 8 o'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Clock.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, you told me shut the up. So I'm scared to talk.

[Monet X Change]

I forgot what I was gonna say.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Someone's not doing well in the morning. What position do you sleep in?

[Kennedy Davenport]

Normally?

[Monet X Change]

I sleep in, like, I don't know, like, I normally like this. Like, on my side.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And what about your leg? What are your legs doing?

[Monet X Change]

My, My legs are straight or maybe like a little, like, curve, like this. Or then I do a little stomach moment where I'm like, fully just flat, and I do a back. I, I, I.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sleeping in your stomach is bad for you, is it? I think sleeping on your stomach might be bad for you.

[Monet X Change]

Says who?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, I think I read it somewhere with, like, doctors. I think, like, because what?

[Monet X Change]

You're like.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're like pressing your stretch out or something. But maybe I read that wrong. Yeah, I sleep in the fetal position. And then throughout the course of the night, one of the legs will be extended and then I'll be like a half fetal, so I'm still, like, on the side. And then I have one knee completely pulled in and one leg completely extended down.

[Monet X Change]

They had a moment for even. Back in New York, it happens randomly. I have, like, night sweats. Does this happen to you? And I'm like. I wake up and my pillow is, like, soaking wet, and I'll get out, jump out of sleep, like, ugh. I'm, like, wet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No. I mean, no. Ezra sleeps. Ezra sleeps with clothes on. Oh, no, I can't because of how sweaty he gets. Because he's like. He's like, if I don't wear a shirt Shirt or, like, some pants to bed. This whole. This whole side of the bed will be wet.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So the clothes soak up the sweat so he. So that the bed's not.

[Monet X Change]

Soak it up, y'.

[Kennedy Davenport]

All.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Brandon. So his bed's not covered, his side's not covered. But when I sleep on the plane, this happens almost every single time. First, my crotch gets so sweaty, I wake up and I think I piss myself. Has it ever happened to you?

[Monet X Change]

I mean, no, not my. I wake up, my whole body's wet. Not like my crotch specifically.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know what it is. I would have a plane. I'm like, I cannot really just piss myself on this plane.

[Monet X Change]

I'm gonna have to. It cannot be that much of water.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not. It's not. It's not like actual. It just feels, and then I touch it. It's not actually damp. I mean, it's, like, a little damp, but it's not like. It's not, like, as damp as when you piss yourself. I used to piss the bed, too.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. We were both bedwetters until I was, like, 12. Yeah. But sleeping honestly, do not shame your child when they wet the bed. They are not doing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's nothing you can do about it. My mom didn't shame me, but I think I had maybe some uncles and aunts who were, like, really just annoyed by me pissing the bed. And I was there. I remember. I remember hearing adults in my life say stuff like, you gotta be ashamed of yourself. And I was like, I am. I am. I just slept in piss all night. I'm very ashamed.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, my dad.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't need any help.

[Monet X Change]

My dad would fully act like. He was like. He was like, you're too lazy. I'm like, bitch, I'm sleeping. What do you mean, lazy? I'm sleep. I'm not. I'm not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm busy.

[Monet X Change]

I'm busy. I'm sleep. Love that song. Oh, we said it before.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. We stand free.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. I just. Listen, if you are. If you're a former bedwetter or a bedwetter, if your kids are. If you have a kid that's bedwetter, just. Just try. Try to help them out in some way, but do not. Do not tease them, because, yeah, there is a lot of shame around.

[Monet X Change]

Or make fun of, like, not make fun of it, but, like, laugh with them about it. You know what I mean?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Make it. Make it. Yeah. Make it seem like it's not that big of a deal.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Just kind of like, oh, no, I'm

[Monet X Change]

about to be like, well, don't call him a but.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, and there are times where you're just in your dreams just peeing and you're like, I have this as an adult. I'm in my dream, I'm peeing. Like, I am just. I wake up and I'm like, I'm fully. I was. That was real pissed. You never pissed in a dream. You look at me like, I am peeing. I am joking. Just fully peeing right now.

[Monet X Change]

Those are wet dreams. And I was like, oh, my God, I definitely did it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've had. I have a dream where I go to the bathroom in my dream, and then I start pissing for real. And then that. That sensation wakes me up and I'm like, oh. And I'm like, oh, God.

[Monet X Change]

Close the faucet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Girl, you can't clap it off.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Girl.

[Monet X Change]

You cannot clap off the faucet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I have a heavy flow.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah. When Bob. It smells like you. Someone open a bottle and just like squeeze it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But it's only for like a few seconds, though.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, I can. I. I love sleeping on planes. Like, I. I get very restful sleep on a plane. Some people can't at all.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I cannot sleep on a plane. And I mean, so there's so this thing called Delta One. I'm sure they have on other planes too, but Delta 1.

[Monet X Change]

Anyway, tell us about Delta 1, honey.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Delta 1 is only on international flights. No, you let me finish my sentence. International flights from America or from LAX to Nueva York to New York or LAX to Boston are the only way on domestically you can do Delta 1. And it's just when you're where you're say Boston because.

[Kennedy Davenport]

I don't know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because they're pretty close to each other, flight wise.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like a flight from LA to Boston is like 30 minutes. I mean, flights in New York to Boston, like 30 minutes.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I imagine if you're not taking off, it's probably just another 15 minutes in the sky.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Anyway, so it lies flat like a bed. But I don't even need that.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah, for sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can be in the back. I can be on the toilet, pass out. I can sleep just like this on

[Monet X Change]

the planes for sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Even in this chair. Just work.

[Monet X Change]

I could do that too. Can you sleep with noise? Like, if you're not on a plane? For me, I can. It varies though. Sometimes this shit is too noisy. Like shit of banging, popping is too much.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I lived in a corner apartment on the first floor in Washington Heights. And if you. If you all want to just experience the noise. I lived in 162 and four in Fort Washington.

[Monet X Change]

Do you think it's still noisy or the noises?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There's no. There's no way. It's quiet. I lived there for three. It is. There were times where it literally was like, there's someone in the room with me. It literally felt. Would you agree this, Jacob? People would talk. They would literally just stand right at my window. And because there's an air conditioner, there's more sound comes in because the window's partially open. And it would just sound. It would just feel like people were just literally in the room standing over my bed, having a conversation.

[Monet X Change]

I would never forget the fucking drug deals that would happen outside your door. And you had. You had no idea, Bob. We came back from the super from the supermarket one time. Bob was like, there's just always money here on this ledge under this rock. And I was like, not always.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I was like, what is this money doing here?

[Monet X Change]

And I was like, bob, what do you think is doing there? Someone left it there. And then the person's gonna pick up the drugs and put the thing back. Like, duh. Like, literally right outside your window.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

See, it's money first, not drugs first. Or it was on my window. It was my windowsill.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, it was probably drugs first. Probably the drugs or no money. Yeah, money first.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because these crackheads are fucking.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Remember that time?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Maybe it was weed. Maybe it was.

[Monet X Change]

Think it was weed. Crack cocaine. Who knows what it is?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel like people are less ridiculous with weed. People aren't, like, dropping in spots and doing all that.

[Monet X Change]

Well, it's also legal in New York, so, like, whatever.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not legal to sell weed.

[Monet X Change]

Not legal to sell. But I. If you find a thing of weed on the thing, the cops are not gonna be like, oh, I feel like

[Bob the Drag Queen]

weed dealers are usually more like, come to your house. But I don't think you want someone selling crack to come to your house.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, no. I mean, maybe not crack, but cocaine and stuff and, like, pills. I think they do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There was definitely. They were selling was definitely harder than coke and weed. That wasn't a little molly.

[Monet X Change]

Remember that time we were coming back from the super, and we saw someone literally shooting up on the way?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I used to live in.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, that was a gag.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Washington High School.

[Monet X Change]

And y' all know Bob. I was like, monet. Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Was that a bad neighborhood?

[Monet X Change]

No, I mean, in New York, you're always a hop, skip and a jump from a bad neighborhood.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, when I lived on the Upper west side, I saw people shooting up over there, too.

[Monet X Change]

Really?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. If you go down. I used to live in 106 in Amsterdam. Oh, I know where you cross over to Broadway and head towards the McDonald's between 106 and 105 on Broadway. This lady used to just shoot up right there, sit on the. Sit on the stairs, and just like,

[Monet X Change]

damn, that is crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They put it in. There's like. And they just go. It's really wild. I watched. I watched it put it in. Then it's. It's like in Sansa, just like, they're, like, feeding. And she was like,

[Monet X Change]

that's crazy, man. Don't even do that. I don't want to see you like that. That's wild. If you ever got a role where you're playing like an addict like that, I don't think I'll be able to watch it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I mean, I would like to portray it well enough that it's like, you know.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Which I feel like it would if you're portraying it, that it's so real. I don't think I'll be able to watch it. It'll be so sad to me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, just. You know, I never had a heroin problem.

[Monet X Change]

I know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I used to do a little computer dots I haven't even done called,

[Monet X Change]

you know, the cocaine. I cannot even imagine your cocaine. Oh, my God. Can you imagine Bob and cocaine playing on King of Tokyo?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You think you in Mesopotamia, bitch. I would have been with the dinosaurs, honey, running around.

[Monet X Change]

I'm doing shrooms again, so I'm very excited.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You used to be very.

[Monet X Change]

And I'm gonna do acid. This is what.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I never know what to say around you. Because the last time you went to the desert to do your drugs, you were like. You were very like, don't. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want anyone to know that I'm doing these drugs. And now you're like, bitch, I'm about to do shrooms. K. I do not. You were black tar heroine.

[Monet X Change]

You were adding so many things.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Playludes, black beauties. A couple of shots. Well, I'm about to do the booster. About to get a booster.

[Monet X Change]

Shrooms are different. I think shrooms are like weed. They're like. They're.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're.

[Monet X Change]

They're found in nature.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But last. But the first time you went out and did this, you were like. You didn't. You were very like.

[Monet X Change]

Because I've never done them.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You were. Because you Were like, we're not talking about this on the podcast.

[Monet X Change]

Before that, I had never done. I had never ever done anything besides Mood.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Someone found a clip recently that was very interesting.

[Monet X Change]

What clip?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is a clip of me and you on the podcast and I said something that offended you.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, I saw. And I saw. I saw your little comment.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Within less than a minute, I said, I apologize, I won't do that anymore. It was very interesting.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's you and that's me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because you later on was like, this is just like when you made fun of my hands. Then you had me thinking that. I was like, I was going in and going in and then I went back and watched it and I was like, I apologize. I didn't realize I hurt your feelings. I won't do that anymore. It was like less than a minute. I did that.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, bitch. You live your life, Rihanna.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She is proud of her actions, honey.

[Monet X Change]

Live your life, Rihanna.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

My mom used to always say, don't be that proud of being wrong.

[Monet X Change]

Your mom, Mom?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, don't be.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Don't be.

[Monet X Change]

Oh my God. Your mom texted me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh my God.

[Monet X Change]

I have to get my phone.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, you better.

[Monet X Change]

Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Drag Martha.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Hold on.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I did one time drag Martha. Actually put my mom in drag one time and maybe I'll find that and put it on the Patreon.

[Kennedy Davenport]

Can I have experience waking up today?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So today I was in the bed. I actually kind of woke up a little bit when Jacob woke up, but I. I didn't see what time it was cuz I actually woke up at like 4, 4:53, I think it was 4:54, I remember specifically. And I was like, oh. I was like, I'm gonna be Gucci. Because I'm like, I'm already up. But then I lay back down and then I woke up a little bit. And then I fell asleep. And then Jacob comes, thunder clumping in. Were you walking hard on purpose? No, he was not. Jacob walks in carrying this. I don't know what he had. I. I couldn't tell if you were recording recording with the camera or what, but Jacob walked in with this and he was like, hey, baby, it's time to do a podcast. And I was like, okay. And then he just stood over me and I was like, I'm coming. Oh my God. And then he goes, okay. And then what is this? This is my experience with starting the podcast. And I went. And I, I went to his restroom and I sat down. And then about maybe five, ten seconds later, Monet came around the corner.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, see your mom text me yesterday. She said, sorry. Sorry for the misunderstanding. Chris told me that she still talked to that boy. Said, the name, I love you, but I just want to let you know that's shady, but I know if you had to pick tongue out emoji, eye roll emoji, kiss face emoji, heart emoji,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not worth a call with Said.

[Monet X Change]

And I said, oh, no worries, Ma. I totally understand, and I love you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So, y'. All. So you still friends with that boy? Are you friends with that boy?

[Monet X Change]

Are you friends? You asked.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no, I asked you first. Are you friends with that boy?

[Monet X Change]

Yes, I am. Are you friends with that boy? Are you friends with that boy? Are you friends with that boy?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I am social with that boy sometimes.

[Monet X Change]

Sometimes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, I lived in LA for a year and a half, and I've seen that boy twice, Once at your house against my will. Didn't know he was gonna be there.

[Monet X Change]

That's not true. That is not true. True. That is not. You know, that's not true, because I would never do that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But it was. Yeah, me and Jacob, we were like, not a double date in Monet. And then. But also when me and that boy were not talking, Monet fully hired him to work her booth at DragCon, which I did not tell my mom.

[Monet X Change]

Well, I was a new. I was a. I was. I was just in Drag Race. I had no. This was also the year that. That Neverland scammed the fuck out of everybody, and I had literally nothing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There are a few things in life where I just want to say, like, Monet, I have learned to just let you do your things. There are a few things in life where I've been like, I can think of two Neverland. I was like, monet, please don't go to Neverland. Something about them seems off. Monet was like, I have a theory that you do stuff because you don't want to do it the way I did it. That's my theory. Because you're like, I need to differentiate myself from Bob. Especially early in your Draft Drag Race career, you were like, I don't want people thinking I'm like Bob.

[Monet X Change]

Well, the thing with Neverland was, at that point, I felt like I wanted something different than what I have now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you didn't have it then.

[Monet X Change]

It wasn't because you told me, because your advice was, go to the management company with the girls who are doing things that. That you are doing. And back then, I was like, into,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

like, right now we're with bg.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Kennedy Davenport]

What?

[Monet X Change]

Like Naomi and Kim are doing. I was like, oh, I can see myself doing that. So that's why I went that direction. Like, they would do, like, more like branded stuff and, like, more like promotional, like, IG stuff.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you wanted to do that more than acting and performing.

[Monet X Change]

And, I mean, then, I mean, bitch, I grow. I change.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Thank God. If you were a girl who wasn't doing, like, music and acting and stuff and podcasts, and you were just like, I just want to be on Instagram, like, that would. We couldn't do this together.

[Monet X Change]

If Judgy Wudgy was a drag queen,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

it would be about the drag queen was a queen. Did you wizzy on the scene?

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God. What's the second thing? Never mind. What's the second thing?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Recently. It was yesterday. We were. We were out on the slopes, and everyone, everyone, Patty Kennedy and Monet specifically, all kept making fun of me. I put on my snow gloves to go out. We were supposed to go out there, and I was like, I won't wear my snow gloves because it's going to be very cold outside.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And they were like, no, girl, put on nails. Don't do that. And I was like, monet, we need to be wearing gloves because it is very cold outside. When it was like, girl, I'm wearing nails. I'm looking cute. And then when it was like, don't wear them for this, we get up the re. Interview and Gus Kenworthy.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my hands were freezing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And Monet is over here. The. The. The. Her hands are as wide as Jacob.

[Monet X Change]

No, but she had.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Her hands were looking like a Jew. So she sits there and we're trying to interview. Monet is trying to hold. That's not true.

[Monet X Change]

I was holding the mic.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, Monet was holding about. When it was white knuckle that.

[Monet X Change]

No. I would put one hand on the mic and one hand between my legs to warm it up, and I would switch it throughout the interview. But again, I'm not mad at that because I look very cute in my full red look with those. With those red nails. I look very cute. I don't regret it. Let's, let's, let's, let's. We're gonna throw these pictures up right now. I like you on the screen. You look cute, too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But look at that. With his mittens and gloves. Yeah, and my hands were warm. Dinner mug, honey. Yeah, I look cute.

[Monet X Change]

You do look cute.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm part of the whole snow look.

[Monet X Change]

Right? But also, I didn't have red gloves. If I had red gloves, I'd be one Thing you had black gloves that match your.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then we went back out again. And then. So then we go back out again. I said, monet, put the gloves on now. And Monet's like, no, I don't want to put the gloves on. This was even. It was even later. It was nighttime now, so Monet is going to be very cold. We had to walk all the way

[Monet X Change]

up this hill, but I had hand warmers and that was fine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, we had to walk all the way up the fucking hill. But then it was not fine because Monet couldn't even hold the microphone. We were both holding it. Then towards the end of the day, I realized I was the only one holding the microphone.

[Monet X Change]

You fully took on. You took it from me, though, because

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't want you with your hands out.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's nice of you, but I would have. I would have done my best.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So then Monet was in. So Monet went from being like, I'm only serving this look to being in a full on North Face jacket on top of her outfit with warmers. But it was like, you know what, you're right.

[Monet X Change]

Well, that's because the Gus Kenworthy thing was done. Like the glam part of it was done. So I was like. And also the thing, in fact, commenting was done.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why is the interview more glamorous than the.

[Monet X Change]

Because we were interviewing Gus Kenworthy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Interviewing Gus Kenworthy at the bottom of the slope too.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but we didn't know we were going to do that. That just happened. That was happenstance. But after the glam stuff was done, we were just outside fucking around with people, talking to Milo, his little seven year old ass trying to pop up,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

pop us down the hall. Milo's about to be the next sibling. I was like, milo, give us a week.

[Monet X Change]

Or what other people.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What if we give kids a podcast? About what?

[Monet X Change]

Like how old kids?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Maybe somewhere between 13 and 18.

[Monet X Change]

Bobby, you came and take Euphoria. You want to talk to the group?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We're thinking of doing drugs and stuff.

[Monet X Change]

Wow. Kids are different now. I think you. I think you'll be surprised what kids are doing. Okay, not fentanyl and cocaine and heroin, obviously.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm gonna say this again because you went to high school sucking dick, doing drugs.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not saying that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

High school. I went to Looney Tunes High school. I. I went to. I mean, my high school was wild, but we weren't doing drug. It was just.

[Monet X Change]

Besides, you weren't doing drugs doesn't mean other people weren't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was not rude. I was Tommy Pickles.

[Monet X Change]

And I think that you, Susie, I think that you were very shocked at what kids 13 to 18 year old are doing now in high school. And in high school, I think you'll be very shocked. Y' all comment. Comment below if you think that's true.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think there were even. There were some 13 year olds back then who were doing it too. Drew Barrymore was famously a drug addict before she was even 10 years old.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

Was she?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, she was a drug addict on one.

[Monet X Change]

What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know, cocaine and stuff.

[Monet X Change]

I think before she was 10 years old, she got.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She. She went during E.T. she started doing drugs and drinking. She's been very open about it.

[Monet X Change]

Whoa.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

Gag.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So there have been. There have always been kids doing drugs and drinking and stuff. Especially I'm in the room. So I think I hear people. You don't know that I think it is. That is.

[Monet X Change]

But you don't know if it's not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, that's the difference. I'm not claiming that my thing to def. To definitive be true. You're. You. You have no evidence to be. I'm not saying definitively your documentary is Euphoria. I said that Euphoria is not a documentary on it.

[Monet X Change]

What I said. And I'm gonna reiterate. I'll say you'll be shocked that more kids are doing that than you think in school.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you don't know that. You're just assuming that.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, you're assuming that I'm wrong.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So you'd be shocked if kids weren't doing drugs?

[Monet X Change]

No, I would not be shocked if they weren't doing drugs. We all know that a lot of the majority of kids probably are not. I'm saying that you'd be shocked that more kids are than you think.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I'm gonna say I don't think that. I think my idea is that you have nothing to this baseless claim.

[Monet X Change]

It's not a baseless claim. It's my lived experience.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Your experience of your lived experience with children today, you have a lived.

[Monet X Change]

No. From. No. From my experience going to kids today,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I say this even more. What is your lived experience with children

[Monet X Change]

today by seeing shows like Euphoria? Euphor is not the only show.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Euphoria is not a documentary, Mon.

[Monet X Change]

It's not based on Today.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You think the kids are also wizards. Harry Potter. There must be more wizards.

[Monet X Change]

It's not a documentary.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you today.

[Monet X Change]

My God, get out of it. How about.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How about the kids with superpowers?

[Monet X Change]

Euphoria is not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not a documentary, but euphoria is

[Monet X Change]

probably was was created.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I watched Riverdale, so there must be more Detectives, too.

[Monet X Change]

You know what?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There must be. I saw Riverdale, so there's probably more.

[Monet X Change]

We can do a whole another podcast about. There's more.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

There are more high school reporters in Detectives. I watch Riverdale.

[Monet X Change]

We had an hour. We're done. You take your ass to there.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're so ridiculous.

[Monet X Change]

Hear that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right, bye everyone.

[Sponsor/Advertisement Voice]

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