The One Where We Ruin Monet's Surprise Party

Summary

Sibling Rivalry – "The One Where We Ruin Monet's Surprise Party"

Date: February 19, 2024
Hosts: Monét X Change & Bob the Drag Queen

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Episode Overview

In this lively and chaotic episode of Sibling Rivalry, Monét X Change and Bob the Drag Queen’s banter hits new heights (and lows) as they spiral through topics ranging from juicy drag-to-drag athletic wagers, confessions on surprise party planning blunders, personal stories about drag, hairlines, award jealousy, and their signature petty, loving squabbling. The episode is defined by a hilarious accidental unmasking of Monét's surprise birthday party, fierce negotiations over a proposed backflip challenge, reflections on drag community moments, and iconic award show shade. Below, you’ll find a detailed breakdown—complete with timestamps and memorable quotes—of everything these two hilariously (mis)handled in this episode.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Fashion, Athleisure & Drag Style Confessions

[Timestamps: 01:49–04:54]

• Discussion begins with Monét and Bob comparing style choices, especially Uggs, Juicy Couture, and athleisure wear.
• Bob remembers longing for Juicy Couture:

  "When I was a little gay boy, I used to think Juicy Couture stuff was so cute. And like all the girls used to have Juicy Couture and I wanted Juicy Couture so bad, but obviously I never did it." [02:12]

• Monét’s take on Uggs:

  "They seem really easy to clean and Uggs just seem... And I can't even imagine a New Yorker wearing Uggs." [02:31]

2. Hyper-Femininity, Early Queer Identity & Drag Nostalgia

[04:00–04:45]

• Bob reflects on childhood fascination with hyper-femininity and how it related to their identity:

  "There was some deep seated faggotry obviously percolating inside of me. I just wanted to be so gay and so femme, but I would not allow myself to." [04:00]

• Playful wordplay about "faggot tree" and seeding queerness:

  Monét: "Now, did you literally mean faggot tree?... That’s beautiful poetry." [04:26]

3. Backflip Wager & The Trampoline Challenge

[05:00–11:15]

• Conversation escalates when Bob doubts Monét’s claim to do a backflip on a trampoline.
• They hilariously negotiate the stakes for a public backflip challenge at a live show.
  • Bob: "Let's make a motherfucking wager, bitch... we rent a trampoline for our show at the Belasco on May 5th." [07:25]
  • The original wager was for $500; quickly renegotiated because Monét claims Bob owes her money from previous bets.
• Monét demands Bob’s All Stars 7 scepter or Moon Man award as the prize instead; Bob counters wanting Monét’s Peabody or GLAAD award.
  • Monét: "I want your scepter... The one you just received. The one you just got in the mail. I want it." [08:46]
  • Bob: "If I win, I get your Peabody Award." [10:00]
• Comical negotiation stalls with both refusing to budge, reflecting their competitive repartee.

4. Surprise Party Spoilers & Birthday Drama

[12:12–14:18]

• The episode's titular moment: Monét’s surprise birthday party is inadvertently spoiled in real time by a friend.
  • Bob: "Wait, what event for my birthday?" [12:22]
  • Ryan Reynolds (producer): "I thought we were doing something for, like, a birthday thing. Maybe I was wrong." [12:26]
  • Monét: "Oh, not taking spoiler. Surprise." [12:32]
• Bob and Monét dissect the anatomy of surprise-party failings, laying the blame on mutual friend Andy for not clearly marking the group chat as “surprise”—with classic Sibling Rivalry finger-pointing:
  • Monét: “Rule number one of planning a surprise is you say it's a surprise.” [13:49]
  • Bob: “Y’ all are insane.” [14:16]

5. Fans, Fame, and Public Encounters

[18:44–20:36]

• Anecdotes about fans showing up at drag queens’ homes and events worldwide.
  • Bob: "When we were on tour in Australia... there would be fans waiting at the gate, because in Australia you can go to the gate." [19:23]
• Discussion of last year’s (secret) birthday paintball parties and who was (or wasn't) invited.

6. Hairlines, Hair Loss & Vulnerability in Drag

[21:31–23:13]

• Both share stories of coming to terms with receding hairlines.
  • Monét recounts the “aha” moment before shaving:

    "I took a selfie on the plane and posted it. And I was like, who is that girl I see? Because she's not anyone I've ever recognized before." [21:35]

  • Bob admits, "My hairline was used to be here, and I decided to shave it. When it got to, like, here, I was like, this is too much forehead." [22:19]

7. "Beijing", Tattoos, and Cosmetic Regrets

[25:03–29:02]

• Bob describes seeing a man with a drippy Beijing (hairline enhancement) on the subway, delivers the line:

  "I'm like, girl, you're not fooling nobody. Shave that shit off. That looks crazy. The Beijing." [25:23]

• Conversation evolves into tattoos, tattooed freckles, and (semi-)permanent body modifications.
  • “You can get henna freckles... they just kind of fade away after a while.” – Monét [26:47]
• Candid talk about plastic surgery regrets in the drag community, referencing Trinity the Tuck and the emotional impact of public scrutiny.

8. Award Show Bragging & Inside Drag Industry Gossip

[38:23–46:42]

• The duo reflects on award show victories, including GLAAD, Peabody, Emmys, Grammys, and “Moon Man” trophies.
  • Monét: “I did win the GLAAD Award for We're Here three years in a row, so it's possible.” [41:25]
• Bob dreams of Grammy glory and acknowledges Monét’s industry achievements.
  • “I'm gonna win a motherfucking Grammy one day. Like, I really am committed to doing the work...” [48:22]
  • Monét: “It would be so much fun to be able to see that and witness you experiencing your, you know, your dreams.” [48:36]
• Candid shade thrown about who actually owns which trophy.

9. Music Fandom: Infinity Song, Brandy, Alicia Keys, Jonas Brothers

[43:21–45:10]

• Bob and Monét rave about Infinity Song and other musical acts, trading recommendations and reminiscing about their personal music histories.

10. Negotiation Fails & Cliffhanger

[52:53–54:41]

• Final minutes are spent relitigating the backflip wager, swapping and rescinding demands for prized drag ephemera.
  • “You can change it when you want to and not change it when you want to. No, you said the photo or the one I just got once it's been agreed on...” – Bob [52:53]
• Joking threats of getting a manager to negotiate, before the episode devolves into laughter and mutual sign-off.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Athleisure:
  “It's giving athleisure. I feel like there's gonna be a juicy on the butt.” – Monét [02:04]

• Drag Queen Athleticism:
  “You don't seem like a flippy kind of girl.” – Bob [06:17]

• Surprise Party Drama:
  “Rule number one of planning a surprise party. You have to say it's a surprise. Otherwise, it's just a party.” – Monét [14:18]

• On Fans & Fame:
  “People show up at Katya’s house. We show up at Chickfila. People show up at a door in Lawma's house.” – Monét [18:44]

• Hairline Realness:
  “I remember seeing a picture. I was like, this is too much forehead for someone to have. I gotta let it go.” – Bob [22:19]

• Body Modification Regrets:
  “If someone has, like, a botched boob job... they know. They knew before you knew.” – Monét [28:02]

• Sibling Rivalry Spirit:
  “You were overpowered and you were taking advantage of Bob.” – Monét [53:21]

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Important Timestamps

• [01:49] – Styling confessions, athleisure, and Ugg shade
• [05:00] – The backflip challenge is issued
• [07:25] – Bet negotiations erupt and drag memorabilia enter the arena
• [12:12] – Monet's surprise birthday accidentally revealed
• [14:18] – Party etiquette: the rules of a real surprise party
• [21:31] – Vulnerable hairline stories
• [25:23] – “Beijing” hair paint shade
• [41:25] – Winning GLAAD awards and dreaming of more
• [43:21] – Music fan segment: Infinity Song, Brandy, Alicia Keys
• [52:53] – Last round of negotiation mayhem

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Final Thoughts

This episode of Sibling Rivalry is a prime example of what makes Bob and Monét’s dynamic so beloved. Razor-sharp wit, egoless vulnerability, and infectious laughter combine with surprisingly real talk about life as queer icons, drag queens, and best frenemies. Don’t expect clear resolutions, but do expect plenty of quotable moments and the sincere warmth that underpins every drag queen read.

For future episodes: Will the trampoline face-off actually happen? Will Monét ever host her own surprise party? And who will blink first in the next round of drag queen Olympics negotiations?

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Transcript

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm Kiana. And I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turned back. I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know, and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like I can't stop. I'm addicted. Start your free [e-mail].

[Ryan Reynolds]

hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Now I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of

[Bob the Drag Queen]

unlimited Premium Wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun

[Ryan Reynolds]

if we made $15 bills.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial. Give it a [e-mail] switch upfront payment

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 or 12 month plan required $15 per month equivalent taxes and fees. Extra initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes. Me slow when network is busy. See terms.

[Monet X Change]

My name is and I'm Monet X

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Change and this is sibling rivalry. On this week's episode, we make an epic backflip wager.

[Monet X Change]

We spoil Monet's surprise party and we

[Bob the Drag Queen]

find out what made Bob say this.

[Monet X Change]

Let me post my first post, friends. Let me add Jacob and post my very first ever close friends. It's kind of exciting. And we find out what made Monet say this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm like, girl, you're not fooling nobody. Shave that shit off. That looks crazy. The Beijing. Okay, Ms. Thing, she's looking cute. That's cute.

[Monet X Change]

You know, I hate to acknowledge it, but you can tell when I was dressed and when I dressed myself. They seem pretty clear. I'm self aware enough to acknowledge that

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was on my stylist today. Do you like my look?

[Monet X Change]

You look very nice actually. You look sporty. It's giving athleisure. I feel like there's gonna be a juicy on the butt.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I wish I wanted. There was a time in my life where I wanted to buy Juicy Couture. Cause I mean, when I was a little gay boy, I used to think Juicy Couture stuff was so cute. And like all the girls used to have Juicy Couture and I wanted Juicy Couture so bad, but obviously I never did it. I didn't want. I don't want to be found out. But I like how ju.

[Monet X Change]

Couture the vibe of it. I wasn't into the whole aesthetic personally. I didn't like the. I didn't like the Uggs with the juicy couture. I always thought that Uggs just look like such dirty shoes. All. Whenever I see Uggs, all I think to myself is how dirty is that shoe? I always think that there's so much fur wool and just. And you know, you look at like boots are like leather but like, like a shiny leather. Not, not a, not a patent leather or even like a finished leather, but not like a suede leather. They seem really easy to clean and Uggs just seem. And I can't even imagine a New Yorker wearing Uggs.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I used to wear Uggs all the

[Monet X Change]

time and they probably looked. And like in the wintertime like you, you walk in like I wouldn't know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You see, you wear your Uggs when it's very cold, but you don't wear it or when it's actually snowing because your shit will get dirty. So I would just wear it when it's really cold.

[Monet X Change]

You know the girls who wear the fuzzy, the fuzzy slippers outside, I'm like

[Bob the Drag Queen]

the slides, the slides that have the like the fox fur on it.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. I'm like, this has to just be. This has to be disgusting. But even still, New York City itself, like just the city itself is just so. There's just so much going on. And you know, I'm the queen of I don't care. I was just talking about how I don't care today. I was telling people how I don't care, but that I care about that I do care about.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I mean there had a time where I think my fascination with juicy Couture is because it just felt so hyper feminine. It was so girly to me. And there was some deep seated faggotry obviously percolating inside of me. I just wanted to be so gay and so femme, but I would not allow myself to. Obviously I couldn't be. People couldn't know I was gay. Meanwhile, I'm walking down the hallways like this.

[Monet X Change]

Now, did you literally mean faggot tree? Cuz you said seed and then tree as if the tree came from the seed. Which would be really poetic if you meant it that way. I did. Honey, that's beautiful poetry. I'm so proud of you. That was beautiful.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Flow tree. Did you know that Amanda Seals was part of Flow Tree?

[Monet X Change]

I did not know that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

When the girl was a child actor, she was in flowchry. She can do Backflips. She plays basketball. Like, what's up? Like, what's going on?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Can we do that? Oh, girl. She. She always be on a trampoline, but bouncing around doing flips everywhere.

[Monet X Change]

You know, whenever someone does a backflip, I'm always like, they do. I'm always pointing out, like, did you know so and so can do a backflip? That's crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know? You know Elon Musk can do black backflips. Well, he does backflips, but he also does backflips.

[Monet X Change]

That's not true.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Elon Musk can do a backflip on

[Monet X Change]

solid ground or on a trampoline.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't. I saw it on a trampoline, but I would.

[Monet X Change]

Anyone can do a backflip on a trampoline.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Anyone. Can you do one on a trampoline?

[Monet X Change]

For sure, 100%, Bob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I would literally buy a trampoline.

[Monet X Change]

This is without even practicing. I could do it on the first try.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's okay. So you've never done it, but you know you can do it backwards on a trampoline.

[Monet X Change]

I've never done it. I have done it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But you just said on the first try.

[Monet X Change]

No meaning, like, the first time you see me do it. I don't need to practice between now and then. If we. If you were like, get thee to a trampoline, I would get on and within. Within one minute, I would complete one full black backflip where I land on my feet. Or maybe possibly in the spider man pose. Possibly in the spider man pose. What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like the.

[Monet X Change]

Yep, Very. That I don't know. I can do it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I will buy a trampoline. Yes, I can do it. Back from a trampoline.

[Monet X Change]

So why are you so shocked that I could do it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because you don't seem like a flippy kind of girl.

[Monet X Change]

You feel like. You swear. Your athleticism is so far above mine. You swear.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I never said that.

[Monet X Change]

You think you can run faster than me? You think you can do more push ups than me? You think you can last longer than me And Cardi, you've said all these things on the podcast.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I said that I can beat you in a foot race. I said that I can. What else did you say? One of them. I did not say that. You said. I said.

[Monet X Change]

You said you can bench press or bench press more than me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I absolutely can. How much do you bench press?

[Monet X Change]

It doesn't matter. More than you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How much do you bench press? You don't even know how much you bench press, but yet you can do more than me.

[Monet X Change]

I know it's more than you that I know for sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Y' all let me know if y' all identify. Don't bitches that adjust their glasses get on your nerves. Anytime I see a bitch talking to somebody and they give me one of these, I'm like, put your fucking hand down.

[Monet X Change]

Cause you know I'm gathering.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Don't you ever adjust your fucking glasses at me, bitch.

[Monet X Change]

But, yeah, you know, I could do a backflip for sure, easily. I know that would happen. I might do it at the fucking show. Bring a trampoline.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm about to say, let's make a motherfucking wager, bitch. Let's make a wager then. What's up? What's good?

[Monet X Change]

What's the wager?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The wager is, and I'm heading up to do this, that we rent a trampoline for our show at the Belasco on May 5th. And we will. And you have to do a backflip. I have to do a front flip. If you. If you don't, we doing the same thing. You don't get a front flip, and

[Monet X Change]

I get a backflip. No. No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, so we about to do a backflip. Whoever gets it first has to pay the other $500.

[Monet X Change]

I don't want to do money because you already. We've already done the math. You already owe me, like, $10,000. Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Before we do the competition, we both have to have our $500 in cash. In cash money. We're gonna give it to Jacob. They're gonna put it in a pot, and whoever gets the backflip first walks through with that cash.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not doing 500. Cause first of all, pay me what you owe me before you start trying

[Bob the Drag Queen]

to wreck up weaseling. Keep weaseling out of it because you know he can't fucking do no backflip.

[Monet X Change]

What I'm saying is, we're not wagering money. I'm not. Because you already owe me money. I'd be a no. We've added it up, Bob. The direct winter has added up all of our wages, and you owe me money. So I will not be letting you go into any more debt with me. But we can wage something else, though.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What is the wager then?

[Monet X Change]

I want my wig back.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Which one? That orange one up there.

[Monet X Change]

Actually, no, I don't want the wig back. I want your scepter. The All Star 7 scepter. You seem so confident. I would like the one you just received. The one you Just got in the mail. I want it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why would you. Why do you want my scepter?

[Monet X Change]

It's what I want. I've told you what I want. Now what do you want?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

First of all, here's the thing, okay? If I win, you're not gonna get an acceptor.

[Monet X Change]

I will accept the moon man.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This one.

[Monet X Change]

How many moon mans you got? The Moon Man Award, bitch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, so which one is it?

[Monet X Change]

The scepter or the moon Man?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The moon Man.

[Monet X Change]

I want the scepter.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, you don't get to choose. You asked me. I get to choose what I want.

[Monet X Change]

I said that I'll take the moon. And by the way, I'm not borrowing it. It's mine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, be clear.

[Monet X Change]

Let me be clear.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I knew you're gonna do that. And if I win, what do I want? And if I win? Oh, if I win, I get your Peabody Award.

[Monet X Change]

My. No. What do you mean, no? You get one of my GLAAD Awards. Wow. Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So the GLAD Awards don't mean shit. You're just giving them away?

[Monet X Change]

No, I have four. You can have the one that I share with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You have two.

[Monet X Change]

You have two. Silver.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no. I won the Peabody Award. If you're so confident. If you're so confident. What's up? You. So you can do it.

[Monet X Change]

What's up? If you say first. What do you mean? Are we on the trampoline at the same time? Cause you know if we jump at the same time, one of us will launch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, we're going to. You're going to get your time in the sun. And depending on how many flips it takes you to get it right, how many attempts it takes you. Then I'm going to go, and it will take me six weeks.

[Monet X Change]

You get to go second. That's crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We can rock, Paper, scissors to see who goes first.

[Monet X Change]

Are you going to be a full drag?

[Podcast Host / Ad Voice]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, I can make my drag backflip comfortable. That'll be easy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me too.

[Monet X Change]

I just won't wear a corset.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're so confident.

[Monet X Change]

Not wear a kitty cat wig.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Run me my Peabody, baby.

[Monet X Change]

Okay, first of all, I haven't even held my Peabody. So just like I let you swap out the scepter, I need you to give me another option.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I didn't ask for this. That's your business. You decided to do that. I don't want to swap out. I know what I want.

[Monet X Change]

Extend the same courtesy to me that I.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And the answer is no.

[Monet X Change]

Then I'm going to go back for the scepter. Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, fine.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not giving you my Peabody Award.

[Ryan Reynolds]

If I.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are so confident.

[Monet X Change]

Anything else but what I'm saying. The difference is, I'm saying that I can do a backflip. I don't know that I can do it faster than you. I don't know how fast you'll do it. You might be practicing also. You have time to practice between now and then. I ain't traveling.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I literally. Bob. I leave tomorrow, and I'm not back home until the beginning of March. And then I. I have no time.

[Monet X Change]

You're going where?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm going to New York. I had to go to undoing the Love Ball. I'm going to film my show.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not home until April. So you have all. You have all of March.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She's also lying. She's gonna be in town in the middle of February because we're doing an event for her birthday.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. Monet's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So much for my birthday.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

So what's the Monet?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, what event for my birthday?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I thought we were doing something for, like, a birthday thing. Maybe I was wrong.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who told you that?

[Monet X Change]

Oh, not taking spoiler. Surprise.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Never mind.

[Monet X Change]

Gang. Gang. But you are in town, though. Wait, what's crazy? Maybe Angie needs to make it more clear when he's trying to make surprises. Andy needs to be more clear what's the surprise and what's not.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, so that's not. That was Andy's fault that he entrusted Jacob information. It's Andy's fault.

[Monet X Change]

That's it. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is how these two operate. Jacob just spoiled my surprise, and Bob

[Monet X Change]

flips it on me. Andy is realty.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We're not playing paintball together as a birthday thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No. That was my gift last year. Are we doing that again this year?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay. I would just like to say no one told me that this was a surprise. There is a group text with many people on it. Is there no point in it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Am I in it? I'm not in it. You know I'm not in it. I'm not in it. Wait, they're planning a.

[Monet X Change]

If you need to make it clear that it's a surprise. If you're planning a surprise.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Also, that was Andy's fault that Jacob ruined the surprise.

[Monet X Change]

The rule number one of planning a surprise is you got to say it's a surprise.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I am gagged. I am so gagged by the two of y'. All.

[Monet X Change]

Rule number one of a surprise is you say it's a surprise.

[Ryan Reynolds]

There is no greetings to everybody. No need for intros or reactions. There are 17 people on this thread

[Bob the Drag Queen]

and no, and he did not met January. Jacob Ritz.

[Monet X Change]

Is Monet one of the people on the thread?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jacob, I'm not on this group text message.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She's not.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, that's Andy's fault. Andy fumbled the bag on that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Y' all are insane.

[Monet X Change]

Rule number one of planning a surprise party. You have to say it's a surprise. Otherwise, it's just a party.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God. I cannot believe that this surprise get together. Have you remember?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I think Monde's doing a bit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm not doing a bit. Well, how am I doing a bit? I'm not even in the group. How am I now? Have y' all seen this? I have become. I have gone from these two have made me turn me into the villain of my own.

[Monet X Change]

Listen, Monet and I will figure out this by the end. But if you wanna come see me when they do a backflip, apparently go to seethedragqueen.com to get tickets to us at Netflix is a joke. Go to seethedrad queen.com and just scroll down to the LA date, which is Netflix is a joke. Monday night, we doing some of your live this. We'll move on. But I'm just. I'm just gonna state for the record, that's not Jacob's fault. That's Andy's fault. My baby's safe. Jacob, you're safe.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Y' all are.

[Monet X Change]

Y' all are.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The two of y' all are the wildest people I've ever met. That y'. All.

[Monet X Change]

You know, that's Andy's fault. No, it's Andy's fault. How. How would you plan a surprise draft? Draft your text for my surprise party. Draft it right now in your.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, first of all, I am not including you, okay? Which is a big tell.

[Monet X Change]

Now draft the text.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm like, hey, guys, what's up? It's me, Monet. Exchange. There are a lot of us in here. And just so y' all know, I'm planning this party for Bob, and it's

[Monet X Change]

going to be trying your hardest to avoid you. You bitch. You're trying everything in your power to avoid saying it's a surprise.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're laughing, money.

[Monet X Change]

I can tell you. I know you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can't even say. Let me say what I'm gonna say. I'm like, hey, guys, this is Monet here, Bob's bestie. We're planning this party for him on September 17th. And here are the details. Just let me know if you can say yes. If you're gonna come say no.

[Monet X Change]

That is not a surprise party.

[Ryan Reynolds]

See, this is the text. Greetings, all. Warning. No need for intros or reactions or RSVPing here, just an invite. I would like to invite you to the second inaugural birthday paintball extravaganza for one Monet x Change, AKA Kevin, to be held on and then they put in the date. But we're not going to say that on the podcast. Somewhere in the early afternoon. Details incoming via particle invite, but wanted to get on your calendar. It's happening. We'll probably be between this amount and this amount to participate per person. Sorry, capitalism. Also, Taylor and Alex, could you send me Evan's number?

[Monet X Change]

Also, if I want to know the real gag, the gag is of. The whole gag is of those 17 people. I'm not in it, baby. I didn't make the cut.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. To quote you. To quote you. Everybody always ask me. Everybody always ask me.

[Monet X Change]

Beep, beep, beep, beep. Bitch move. Take a break. We'll talk about this and why I'm not invited when we get back. Close your eyes.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

Exhale.

[Monet X Change]

Feel your body relax and let go of whatever you're carrying to.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts. Oh, my gosh, they're so fast.

[Monet X Change]

And breathe.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order.

[Monet X Change]

1-800-contacts. Now. Now that we've discussed that Andrew is the reason. Why did he not invite me either?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Bob, you. To quote you, everybody always asks me where I am when it's Tor. Girl, you're gonna go on the website just like I did. He probably looked up if you're working if obviously you're probably working on the date that it's gonna be.

[Monet X Change]

Also, it's the second inaugural, meaning you

[Bob the Drag Queen]

weren't here last year either.

[Monet X Change]

How was an annual thing? A surprise. Jacob, text me today because I want

[Bob the Drag Queen]

to see where I am.

[Monet X Change]

I want to see where I am. I want to see where I am.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That was sad. What?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Don't say the date out loud.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They could bleep it, but I don't know. I guess Monet doesn't know when it is. Okay, I'll text it to you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I mean, you might as well tell me now.

[Monet X Change]

No, no, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now you care. Jacob was like, okay, I don't want to Say the date now. Now you care.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, I. I didn't say I want to say the date because I didn't

[Monet X Change]

want people to, you know? But he didn't want people to show up. Googling the places where people play paintball.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, girl, y', all, we are not. We're not Madonna. People aren't gonna like, oh, Monet's here this day. I'm gonna drop what I'm doing and show up at her event.

[Monet X Change]

So, Kim, you never, like, struggle with turkey? Kim used to always say that. I tell this Monet all the time, which is why I keep telling Monet not. I'm gonna say this up one more time, loudly. That's why I keep telling you not to do a home tour. But anyway, people do show up at your house. People show up at Katya's house. We show up at Chickfila. People show up at a door in Lawma's house. We show up at Brooklyn Heights house. People show up at all these houses.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They do.

[Monet X Change]

People used to show up at our home at 162 in Fort Washington. Stand outside that. Bob the Drag Queen. That used to happen there, too, because my door used to open up to the front door. And when we were on tour in Australia, Kim and Emily would be like, leaving Sydney, headed to Australia.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then leaving Sydney, headed to Australia. Wow. How'd they do that?

[Monet X Change]

Leaving Sydney, headed to Brisbane. And they'd be like, okay. And the families would be like, oh, if they're bored, they show them boarding the plane. They'd be like, okay, they're boarding the plane at this time. And when I tell you, there would be fans waiting at the gate, because in Australia, you can go to the gate. You don't need to have a ticket to go to the gate. Fans waiting at the gate. So, yeah, people will certainly show up.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, well, what's really so. And when I was in New Zealand, leaving Christchurch, Bitch, you don't even have to go. You don't even have to go through security. You can go straight from checking your bags to the gate. You don't even have to. I was like, oh, my God, this hasn't happened in America since, like, the fucking. Since before the World Trade Centers.

[Monet X Change]

Not that being a day off kind of wild. I could have came, too. Damn. I could have came. That's a day off, Bob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're not flying from whatever city you're on tour to come.

[Monet X Change]

Who you acting for? Let's just say the town's very close.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, you still come now you know. Now you know. You're gonna come.

[Monet X Change]

I don't. I don't need.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't.

[Monet X Change]

I didn't get the text, but you

[Bob the Drag Queen]

know, the information now your partner is going to.

[Monet X Change]

I'm grateful that Kim gave me up. Kim always invites me to her birthday things, and I always go. That's why I've been at Kim's birthday things, like, three years in a row, because she invites me every time. I don't think I've been to one of your birthday things in a minute.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I didn't plan the last one, as you know. It was a surprise. I just showed up and it was happening.

[Monet X Change]

Surprised I wasn't there. That was a real surprise. I think I was sitting at home that day, too. No, you were not sitting at home looking crazy. Came back bruised up. What the hell going on with you? Where'd you come from? Jacob covered in bruise, paintball hair, all in his little chest hair. He bruised easy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Can you. Can you talk to us about your look? I like. Is this a cardigan you're wearing?

[Monet X Change]

It is a cardigan. It's a card again. It was last time, and it will be again. Yeah, a bunch of change.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And what's the hat? It's fabric. I was a durag.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I used to wear durags religiously when I was. When I had her. And do you remember the first haircut you got? And you were like, it's time.

[Monet X Change]

You mean to shave my head?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

I have a picture of it, and I will not be able to find it. It is so buried so far back. I was headed to Florida to do a gig, and I took a selfie on the plane and posted it. And I was like, who is that girl? I see? Because she's not anyone I've ever recognized before. And why is her hairline so far back? And from that day forward, I was like, never again. Never again. And there's a small chance that I might be able to find this photo. I'm gonna look for it for you all, but I really do not expect to see this one on the screen right here. There's blankness right here. It's just a picture of Fred Sanford.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, who is the guy? Jefferson. George.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, George Jefferson. Sorry.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

Jesus Christ. George Jefferson.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. I was in denial for a while. I was like. My hairline was used to be here, and I decided to shave it. When it got to, like, here, I was like, this is too much forehead. I remember seeing a picture. I was like, this is too much forehead for someone to have. I gotta let it go. Cause my shit was going like this,

[Monet X Change]

you know, I did not need that many.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, hell no.

[Monet X Change]

It really did not take that many for me. I was ready to get out of the game so soon at the first sign of danger. To be honest. I see some people whose hairlines are worse than mine was when I. When I, you know, shaved my head. And I don't even think they look that bad. I'm like, I could have actually gone a little bit further. And I was actually. Because I started shaving my head so soon in the process, I didn't realize how far back my hairline had gone during the shaving. And, girl, I cannot believe I just found this picture. This is crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You found it. Let me see.

[Monet X Change]

Sure did. I'm sitting in the middle seats. You know, it was a long time ago. Girl, I'm in the middle seat. So, you know, this was a minute ago. The year is 2015.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Florida. Were you going to. Which one?

[Monet X Change]

Hamburger Mary's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, I was gonna say something else. The one with that guy in spring. It's like in the panhandle.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, splash, splash. No, I wasn't going to splash splash after Drag Race. This is before Drag Race, actually. This might not be a middle seat. Is that a middle seat? I might be on the aisle.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, you're on the aisle. Oh, yeah. She, she, she.

[Monet X Change]

It's far, y'. All. So it is so. It was there. It is still there. But, you know, I. I could have gone a little further. Honestly, I really feel like I could have finagled and I could have.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

Is that. Is that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is that Law Roach behind you?

[Monet X Change]

Where?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Law Roach is behind you. I could have.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, Law Roach is on Drag Race next week. I mean, he's already. It's already happened by now. I could have grown my hair longer. I could have put the locks, you know, people who push their locks forward. Like Killmonger, I could have done. I could have held on to. I could have held on for a few more for probably another, like, three years, to be honest. But 2015 was when I was like, that was my last haircut that included it in Edge Up.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, what was the gag to me was when I would be riding the train in New York City and then I would, like, be standing up rush hour. And there used to be this dude. He was on my route to work. He was on the same, like, you know, like when you have, like a routine on the train, sometimes you just run into the same person. Often. Cause y' all have similar go home schedules. Whatever you and who?

[Monet X Change]

The Jamaican homophobe.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, work. And then, so one time, I'm, like, riding the thing. He's sitting down when I turn, looking down at his head, y', all, and he is Beijing. Like, it's that fucking. That. That black sprayed, whatever the fuck it is. Like, it can tell it's Beijing, and it's giving Juliana. Because it was like it was dripping on one of the sides, and I

[Monet X Change]

was like, this is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm like, girl, you're not fooling nobody. Shave that shit off. That looks crazy. The Beijing.

[Monet X Change]

I think what you can do, though, is you can get the tattoos on your head that just look like stubble.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Those don't look good. Cause tattoos turn green after a while. It don't be looking good.

[Monet X Change]

Well, you have to get it touched up. I mean, whose tattoo turns green? I mean, I guess white people's tattoos turn green.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, like, look at this. Like, these used to be black, but they're not black black. They're a little, like, black green. Like tattoos. They don't stay, like, black black. It's like a hair follicles aren't black.

[Monet X Change]

They're, like, dark gray. They're not green. You have to dye your hair for it to be, like, black. So I think that if you get the tattoos on your head again, they're just, like, little. They're little beep, beep. They're not like. I see people get the dots, and it actually looks pretty good. And it looks like. Oh, wow. It looks like you have. But the only thing is when you. The only issue is when they shave their head still and it's shiny. Like, how is your head shiny and you have stubble? Something ain't adding up. One plus one is always two every time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I will say this. Have you seen this new trend? And I'm really thinking about doing this. Tell me if it's dumb. Okay.

[Monet X Change]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is this new thing about getting tattooed freckles? I thought about doing it. I think it looks so cool.

[Monet X Change]

You know, I don't think it's dumb. I think that you could probably get freckles in ways that are semi permanent, that don't involve tattooing your skin permanently, because, well, you can get henna freckles. You can get.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's a thing?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. You can stain your skin. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, shit, look at you.

[Monet X Change]

You can stain your skin with other products as well. Like, I mean, henna is a stain, but, yeah, you can stain your product, your skin with lots of products that. That aren't, like, forever and ever and ever. So if they're bad. They just kind of fade away after a while.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I would like to go somewhere. I would love to go. If there's a place I can get henna freckles. I would absolutely get some henna freckles just to see how I look.

[Monet X Change]

I'm sure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you remember when. Do you remember that time in drag when. When. Well, not dragon beauty makeup, when people were doing freckles? I used to do that shit all the time. A couple of my pictures. I used to have those little. I used to put the freckles on my face.

[Monet X Change]

I used to do freckles. I did a freckle look when I was hosting the Pit Stop for my All Stars. I think I'm wearing. I have freckles in my orange look. Who was.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I. Let me try to.

[Monet X Change]

I don't remember. Yeah, when I did the orange look, I had freckles.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Freckles, Yeah. I used to. I used to love my little freckles. I think that was so cute.

[Monet X Change]

So, yeah, I wouldn't get the tattoos. I don't think it's stupid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't.

[Monet X Change]

I don't. You know, I really feel strongly about people making fun of people's tattoos, even though I know that I've made fun of that one tattoo, but I have not made fun of in context to the person, which doesn't necessarily make it easier on that person, actually. Maybe it doesn't make easy on the person, but someone, like, criticizing someone for work they've had done in their body when it's permanent to me does not sit well with me. Like, if someone has, like, a botched boob job or a botched butt, like, leave it alone. Like, they know. They knew before you knew. If someone has a botched butt, bitch, I promise you, they are insecure about it before you ever mentioned it. So I don't. I don't know what it is, but I'm just not comfortable being, like, you know what it is? I think it's because I have a lot of friends who have a lot of work done, and I have always had a lot of friends who had a lot of work done. And why.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why you look at me when you said that? Why you look at me like that when you said that?

[Monet X Change]

Because we're talking to each other, and I think we both know the same friends. For example, we've had Trinity the Tuck come on the show and talk about how she's had work done that she was not happy with. And I think it does take a toll on your. Your mental well, being to hear everyone going on and on about your fucking lips. And you're like, girl, I fucking know. Girl, I know, I know. But. But it's done. They're in there now. And I can't get it out. Or I certainly can't afford to get it out. So what do you want from me? My lips are fucked, and I fucked them up myself, and I'm mad about it. And all I can do is tell everyone else, please don't do it. Please don't go. Don't go through. Don't trade places with what I've been through, Ms. Celie. Like, that's the only thing I can say. You know what I mean?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who said that line? Y' all type it down before we say it. You got five. I mean, how are we going to.

[Monet X Change]

Also, we've not given a shout out in a really long time, so shout out to everybody wearing a cardigan right now. If you're listening to this and you're wearing a cardigan, shout out to you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I'm gonna shout out everyone wearing a sweatsuit. A gray sweatsuit. Cause, you know, I used to be anti gray sweatsuits until I got one. And I'm like, I'm kind of obsessed. I love my little gray sweatsuit.

[Monet X Change]

Well, considering that you like to show your penis in the world.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I do not, like, show my penis. I do not do that. That is a gross mischaracterization of me. I'm sorry.

[Monet X Change]

That is a gross mischaracterization. I apologize. That was not fair to say. What I meant to say was, people see your penis sometimes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't think that's true.

[Monet X Change]

But whether or not you like it, I can't comment on. But sometimes in the world. And I think maybe there's a lot of factors going on in this, but I imagine also, too, that if you have really, really thick thighs, everything's just pushed up front. There's nowhere for it to get. It can't make its way back. Nothing can make its way back. I was once wearing this one

[Ryan Reynolds]

like,

[Monet X Change]

you know those little sex I wear? Mm. But one of them was, like, jersey, and I was walking into the wind.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, Jersey with clinks. Jersey would show everything like satin.

[Monet X Change]

I was in the streets like this. I can't. I had to, like. I was, like, bunching my clothes up and, like, running home. I was like, I can't be out here. This is absolutely. And then Nick got into wearing them, too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I let.

[Monet X Change]

I let Nick borrow one once. Then he went and started buying them because he wore it in a photo shoot one time. He was too hot and he was like, I'm hot. And then he was like, yeah, girl, if you wear the fucking jersey one your penis, everyone can see your penis. And I do not. I don't want people to look at me. I don't want my penis to show when I'm in. I don't want. I don't want a dick print. I don't want a gray sweatpant.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, me either. But sometimes I just don't like wearing underwear sometimes. And like, sometimes I do. So I don't know. I'm not like out here just trying to show my ding a ling off and just be like, I want to apologize.

[Monet X Change]

And I didn't think I. That was a gross miscarriage characterization of you. And. And it was not fair to say. But I do want to say that I go the extra step to make sure my penis is not showing when I'm out in these streets.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean. Okay, so Jacob is showing videos of me at the gym. Like, that has to just do with like, my level of comfortability. Like, I like feeling like femme at the gym. And I like. I'm also like, fully tucked. Like, I'm in.

[Monet X Change]

This is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is not anything different than I would wear out and about in drag. Like, I'm fully. I'm fully. I'm fully wearing a gap.

[Monet X Change]

You would wear this in drag. That. That we're on the same page about.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I fully. I'm like fully 100% tucked. This was. Jacob is showing the picture of me that I had with it with my hair. This was me feeling like my, like my. I was really feeling enby that day. I like. I. Well, not the underwear, obviously, but I wore this. It was a hot day. I wore this outfit like out to like, I had the wig on, I had my eyeliner on, I had that wife beater on and I had sweatpants, I think.

[Monet X Change]

Jacob, point out in the photos that you posted a picture of your bulge on the Internet. I think that's. We'll talk about it after the video.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Take a break, and I'll tell you what the fuck Jacob be fucking posting on his close friends that you ain't seen. How about that? Oh, are we. Are we done spilling secrets?

[Monet X Change]

So we've just discovered that there's another close friend that I'm not a part of. Apparently Jacob and Mikey both have super secret close friends that I've been removed from, which is.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, that's not true. Yeah, I don't have close friends that Monet is on.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, but you do have a close friend that I'm not on.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You saw my last post friend story.

[Monet X Change]

Do I have I. Yeah, you're like,

[Ryan Reynolds]

this is so slutty for you.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, that's right. I did see that. You're right. But do you have a close friend I'm not on is the question.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No.

[Monet X Change]

Why'd you waste a long answer?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just don't. I just don't post on it that long.

[Monet X Change]

Why'd you waste a long answer? What was that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You are out of control.

[Monet X Change]

Since we airing out today, Monet's trying to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait one second. Let me go open the door. One sec. Okay, wait. Should we. Should we go through our crow's funds, Our close friends list? Bob, you don't have one.

[Monet X Change]

No, I do. I do have one. I think Instagram will make one for you. And they made one for me. There's 14 people in it and I was reading it and I'm not on it and Jacob's not in it. But I didn't make this list though.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Work.

[Monet X Change]

But again, I did not make this list. Griffin Matthews in this list. I met Griffin Matthews at a party one time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is Griffin Matthews. Do I know Griffin Matthews?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, he's. What would you know him from? He's an actor. He was most recently on Cheap.

[Monet X Change]

Just look him up. Look him up.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He's also in the Flight attendant. Got it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Griffin.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, we met at a party once. We talked and I follow him on Instagram and now he's in my close friends list. So if I ever post something, Griffin, Matthew is going to be seeing it. Oh, he's let me post my first close friends. Let me add Jacob and post my very first ever close friends. It's kind of exciting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's exciting, Mom.

[Monet X Change]

I've never done one. Jacob, you really. Jacob, you are fourth down in my list of suggested close friends.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What about me? Where am I? Where am I?

[Monet X Change]

You're. You're already on there.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, shit, Jacob. I'm sorry.

[Monet X Change]

That's what I'm saying again. I didn't. I did not make this list. All right, how do I post to close friends? I'm like, I feel like, okay, I can figure that. I know I can figure this out. Actually, I don't need yalls out.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Are you posting something slutty?

[Monet X Change]

No, I'm just posting, hey, guys, this is my first close friend.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Why are you posting. Why are you posting close friends if you're not posting something slutty?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, I don't post everything slutty. On there.

[Monet X Change]

Oh my God. I just posted my first ever close friends. That was fun.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Let me see what his content is.

[Monet X Change]

Can I just say real quick too, in an earnest moment here, that is, there's no camp or comedy around. I want to give a big shout out to Cecilia Gentili from New York City, a and a true cabaret off Broadway icon in the, in the trans community and in the off Broadway community, in the cabaret community space, who passed away today. So. And her life touched a lot of people and a lot of people were, you know, touched by her presence. So, you know, rest in power to you, Cecilia Gentilly. As I was looking at my close friends post, my, my break the Internet close friends post, I, I saw that, a tribute to Cecilia and I was thinking about her again today. I was thinking, it made me think about her right now. I don't know what's going on with my computer, but it's just, she's hit my computer, which is crazy. Cause I feel like I bought this not I feel like I bought this computer less than a year ago.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's kind of wild. Yeah. So this is my desktop, but my laptop I have. So our producer, our editor, Jay Defeo, he like gets like the new computers. Cause he's a fucking geek and like a fucking loser in the best way possible. And every time they have like a, anytime they have like a new MacBook, he like buys the new one. But Jay is such a nerd. Like, he has like, he has like, it's like 32 terabytes of RAM and like 3 million gigabytes terabytes of memory. It's a very like hefty computer like laptop. And then my computer was giving me fever when we were doing exchange rate. He was like, well, I'm giving the new computer, do you want mine? And I was like, no, I can't take a computer. He's like, yeah, you can have my computer and I'm getting a new one. He gave me his like, he's like one year old laptop.

[Monet X Change]

Must be nice. Must be nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know what? It was a very nice thing. Also. I've given Jay a lot. I've given Jay a lot of my talent, my time, my energy, working at the, working at the bars. So it was a mutual, mutually benefit of the relationship.

[Monet X Change]

Have you given him any physical gifts? Like a thing that there was no exchange for because it felt like you performed and then they, someone you got someone paid for.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've, I, I have, I've, I've, I, I've leveraged my Time for Jay. I've done favors with Jay at his. At his bars.

[Monet X Change]

Do you want to tell us one of the favors you did?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. I performed that after I got on Drag Race when I was a internationally recognized drag superstar. I came back and performed for no fee for big events for them.

[Monet X Change]

And you rejected the tips, too?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I. I would. I gave the local girls my tips.

[Monet X Change]

What do you mean? What do you mean? We say local girls? What do you mean, local girls?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The local girls who were in the city that I was. That there were New York girls.

[Monet X Change]

Get your money.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Suck my money.

[Monet X Change]

You think you make more money than every local girl? You think you make more money than every local girl?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, exactly what I mean. And that's what. That's what I said.

[Monet X Change]

Interesting. The real Monet, the 1 percenter, pops out, honey. Every time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. Oh, Bob. I'm doing the first ever Pride in St. Lucia on September. Oh, yes.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God. This feels so massive. Congratulations.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's amazing. Thank you. Wait, ever, ever, ever, ever? The first, like, pride like this happening in St. Lucia? The first ever. They had one in the pandemic. They had one virtually because we were all at home. We did it, like, online, but this is the first one that's happened, like, in the city.

[Monet X Change]

Wow, that's. Are you headlining?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I guess. Yeah, I think I'm headlining it, and I. So if you should come.

[Monet X Change]

You're gonna gag when I'm actually the one you're opening for me? Because I know about the product already, because I'm already booked for it, baby.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You were just like, oh, my God. You had no idea.

[Monet X Change]

Because I'm a good actor, baby. Well, you're not, so that's how I

[Bob the Drag Queen]

know that ain't true.

[Monet X Change]

How do you think I got my Peabody Award, honey?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

For We're Here.

[Monet X Change]

Oh.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, so you meant. So you were acting on We're Here. You were acting on We're Here?

[Monet X Change]

Yes. I never cried. Every tear I've ever cried was an act. I don't cry.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Good to know y' all heard that, Akilah. I hope you hear that, Akilah.

[Monet X Change]

The fuck I look like crying?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Also.

[Monet X Change]

They don't give a. They don't give up people Nice for acting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What is your Peabody for?

[Monet X Change]

I mean, they kind of low key give out Peabody for. I mean, kind of. Not really, but, like, impact. It's like the impact of your things. It's not about how good the acting is. So, like, Quinta wanted Peabody for creating Abbott Elementary. Abbott elementary. But it's not for her acting in Abbott Elementary. It's for the impact of the show. Do you think originally they're journalism awards? Originally?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I think that Civil Library should get a Peabody.

[Monet X Change]

We do have quite an impact. I think we have to maybe prove it somehow or. I don't know if there's a submission process. Jacob, are you looking to submitting civil rights for everybody? Yeah, Jacob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why? Why you ain't out here submitting, Jacob, you should be out here submitting us for awards, honey.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We do.

[Monet X Change]

Jacob asked us for.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Good to know.

[Monet X Change]

How do you think we win these awards?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Studio71, our podcasting parent company, even, is

[Ryan Reynolds]

that just not their job to subtitles for awards? I'm Sorry, isn't it Studio 771's job to submit us for awards, then?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, but I think that there are some that. Since you've been. You know, I think that you. You really tapped into the magic of our podcast. So I think there are some that you. That you're. You're so good, Jacob, at selling stuff. I think you could really sell us on this Peabody.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I'm gonna look into it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Thank you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I will say I did produce the episode, the one we try to win a GLAD Award, and then we won a GLAD Award.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You see your impact.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We will do a part two,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

the coming back on camera just to say that with the finger you sold me on that.

[Monet X Change]

Are we nominated again?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, we are. Okay, y', all, do you think we could win the GLAAD Award for most outstanding podcast two years in a row, do you think?

[Monet X Change]

I will tell you this. I. This is not a brag. I'm just saying this is to give us encouragement and to say, like, it is possible, but I. I did win the GLAAD Award for We're Here three years in a row, so it's possible.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God. I mean, I really want that for us. I just went to. So it's. It was Grammy week, and I went to a few Grammys.

[Monet X Change]

Who has the most GLAAD Awards? I want to find out.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you think. Do you think you're up there?

[Monet X Change]

Um, I have four, and I'm probably top 10, maybe.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You think so?

[Monet X Change]

I think I'm probably top 10, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. What was I gonna say to you? Oh, yeah. So it was Grammy week this past week in la, and it's a lot of hubbub. I went to a few Grammy parties. I went to the Spotify Best New Artist party, which I saw Victoria Monet perform again, y'. All. Victoria Monet is such an amazing. I have to say, it Again, she's so sweet. So I'm standing in line, a bunch of depressed, and she comes up behind me. And did you see on the shade room? So many people were up in arms because she did an interview with Gayle. And Gayle talked about her being like, a queer black artist. And people were like, can we just focus on the music? Why do we have to focus and center it around her queerness? I was like, this was probably one question, like a fucking hour long interview. What do you mean? That's not centered around her queerness, but it is part of her identity. And if she wants to talk about that, like, why are y' all pressed? I was so irritated.

[Monet X Change]

People think there's a gay agenda. They think that it's all pushing a thing and a bip and a boop. Also, shout out to Lauren, who's one

[Bob the Drag Queen]

of the engineers, one of the silent

[Monet X Change]

engineers on the Celebration tour who won a Grammy award last night. So congratulations to her that she won it for working on Victoria Monet's album.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Have you listened to it, Bob? It is such a great album.

[Monet X Change]

I'm gonna put it in my downloads. You know what I want you to listen to?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What?

[Monet X Change]

And you do me a favor. Listen to Infinity Song.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, bitch. I have been on them for the past two, like, three weeks. I am obsessed with Infinity Song. Their whole vibe, this whole, like, 60s rock situation. They're a family. I'm obsessed with Infinity Song. They're so good.

[Monet X Change]

I really like Infinity Song a lot. But that sounds like the kind of music I would like. It's very. It's very my, you know, Woo, woo, woo. I really love oh, my. And the song that's been getting me through is Metamorphosis. Slow Burn.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Slow Burn. It's a slow. Yeah, they're great. They're so good. So y'.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

All.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And do you know they're Jay Z's new project?

[Monet X Change]

I know. So I saw them. They came across my feed and it was like the family that was signed by Jay Z to Roc Nation. And then it had this lady singing Slow Burn. It looked like she was in Greenpoint in front of the river. That's what it looked like. But she was somewhere in New York City. And I was like, oh, I love how the song sounded. Then I found that song. Hater, Hater's Anthem.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Haters Haters. Anthem is so good.

[Monet X Change]

Hater, Hater. I just got really into them and I was like, man, this is such good music. And I just. I've just been on a real. And I think the Infinity Song might end up being my most streamed artist of the year. And I. And I've already been mourning them breaking up, which I don't think they will. I'm not putting it in the air. I don't think I have that power. But most groups don't last forever. And I was like, uh. Like the Jonas Brothers.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh. I was like, what? They broke up? What?

[Monet X Change]

You know, like, the Jonas Brothers, they're still brothers. They're like, we're just doing our own thing now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, the Jonas Brothers, they just literally just did a world tour together.

[Monet X Change]

They got back together.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did they?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, they broke up and then got back together for a thing. And then they're, like, going to do their own things again.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, you know. You know, one. I was.

[Monet X Change]

And then.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I've been really like a throwback music situation. I've already told y' all about the massive impact that Brandy's never had on me. It was like the first album I purchased, I used to listen to have youe Ever and just cry. Like, just have it on repeat and just crying in my bed. Crying for what, bitch? I was like nine years old. What the fuck am I crying about? Anyway, another album that had a really big impact on me that I forgot about was the Diary of Alicia Keys. Bitch, the fucking intro to that. It's called Harlem's Nocturne, and it's her playing this beautiful nocturne and she drops into this, like, fucking hip hop beat. I forgot how fucking amazing that album was. I don't know. Is that the year she won five Grammys? I think it might have been. Do you know that album, Bob?

[Monet X Change]

You know Alicia Keys won a Grammy last night, too. Shout out to Alicia Keys winning a Grammy last night. And also, do you know the Beatles won a Grammy last night?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

For what?

[Monet X Change]

They released an album. They released an album this year.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, there's like, one still alive, right?

[Monet X Change]

There's one beetle still living, one beetle kicking. And I guess all you need is one to make the band. I mean, I don't think any of the, you know, the Temptations are still out there performing, and there's not a single original temptation in the group.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Really?

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, they still perform and there's not. There's not a single temptation originally in that group. There's like a few living Sensations, but none of them are still in the group.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you think we're gonna get, like a. I really would. I really think there should be. They need to, a. Make the Grammys a little more inclusive, like, have, like, some NB Categories. Because if you are. If you are an enby artist, like, and you don't wanna be for best female vocalist or best male vocalists, like, where do you go? They didn't put you over. They want.

[Monet X Change]

The Grammys aren't gendered.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You think about best female, best male.

[Monet X Change]

I don't think they're gendered. I think they're just pop vocalists, country vocalists. I don't think the Grammys are gendered. I'm almost positive they're. But Jacob, Google that. Maybe they are. But. But I feel like they're not gendered, though.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I also think what they should do. Like, they seem to be like a drag music cap, like, category. I think drag music is so specific.

[Monet X Change]

You know, Sam Smith won a Grammy,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

but I don't know if it was for. If they put them. It just put. They just put them in a category. I don't.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

I don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't remember.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sam Smith won for a pop duo so specifically. It was a category for multiple people with Kimberly Petrif.

[Monet X Change]

But is that Sam. Is that their only Grammy? That can't be Samson's only Grammy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, no. They've won more Grammys.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, yeah. If that's the case, Sam Smith got snubbed down because Sam Smith SZA won

[Bob the Drag Queen]

three Grammys and her acceptance speech was so cute. I'm obsessed with SZA as an artist. She's such a great artist.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sam Smith has five Grammys.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah. For pop duo performance, pop vocal song, album, record, pop solo performance, new artist.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Monet X Change]

I don't think the Grammys are gender. So Monet, you got your wish. They're ahead of the curve.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I. I'm gonna win a Grammy one day. I really. I really believe that for me, and I see that for myself. I'm gonna win a motherfucking Grammy one day. Like, I really am committed to doing the work to get that. I mean, I'm already halfway there. I've been working on an album for four years.

[Monet X Change]

Well, I hope. I certainly hope that happens. That'd be so beautiful to be able to watch you win a Grammy. It would be so much fun to be able to see that and witness you experiencing your, you know, your dreams. And I know how much, you know, how much music means to you, you know?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Oh, but speaking of, congratulations to Jay Harrison. Gee, that won their Grammy.

[Monet X Change]

They won a Grammy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They did some Like It Hard.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, my God. That's my. Y'.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

All.

[Monet X Change]

That's my fucking drag sister. Like, we literally used to do drag together. Like, if the. The girls. I have Made outfits for and hip pads for and sang with and ate at diners with and joked with and cacackled and kiki'd with. And they're all out here going to the Met gala and they're winning Tonys. They're winning Grammys. Oh, my God, girl.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They go. They won. They won a Tony last year and a Grammy this year, baby. She is two awards away from an egot.

[Monet X Change]

Well, you know, I think Alex Newell. Well, Alex Newell might get a chance to win an Oscar because, you know, Shucked is getting made into a feature film.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Shut up.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, okay, so does Alex. Does Alex have a Grammy?

[Monet X Change]

Alex has a. No, but Alex does have a Tony. A Tony? She has a Tony?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I thought she won an Emmy for Rachel's Incredibles. Zoey's Playlist.

[Monet X Change]

I don't know if that's true. Jacob, can you google that, please? But they are making Shuck into a movie, and I would be very shocked at.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Shucks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You'll be Shucked.

[Monet X Change]

They didn't have Alex Newell play. Reprise her role as the independent woman.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Interesting. I didn't. I'm so mad I missed it. Is it off Broadway?

[Monet X Change]

The Incorporated Woman? No, it's closed now. It just closed on their last night. They announced the movie gag. Good for you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Alex does not have an Emmy now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, so she has a Tony. A Tony, Okay.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, but I. But I'm only four awards away from an egot, so I'm pretty much there basically at this point. You know, I could have been nominated once, but I didn't actually could have been even numbered three times, but I never was. But I am the host of Amy Award winning show, which feels nice. My show's one of those.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Very nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is very nice. I wanted to.

[Monet X Change]

I was for him.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, it's so interesting. So Drag Race has won a bunch of Emmys for All Stars 7. We won a bunch of Emmys and we got. We got the actual awards. Like, we got them Emmys, not Emmys. Emmys is the one, but I was gonna say Emmys is the only one we didn't get.

[Monet X Change]

So you got that. That's how you got that Moon Man. That's how you got that. That springy was us. That's super robbery.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Never mind. That was Webby. That was a Webby for civil rivalry.

[Monet X Change]

The popcorn and the moon man you got from Drag Race.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not. I didn't get a Trinity has a Moon Man. They got that for Taylor Swift. You need to calm down. No bad blood, Moon Man.

[Monet X Change]

If you don't have one. I asked you for a moon man, and you said you had one. Yeah, knock, knock, nigga.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The whole time. I know I have a popcorn, right? And I'm like, this nigga think I have a moon man. So I was like, if I don't. If I don't correct him, I'm not going. I'm not lying. I'm like, yeah, I don't. I'm like, I don't have a moon man, babe.

[Monet X Change]

I have a knocked and clocked. I want the popcorn.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, we already moved on. Because you don't want to give me your Peabody.

[Monet X Change]

Children, then we're not doing it. Don't order the trampoline then. Sorry, guys. It's not happening. Because when they tried to swindle me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, you just whack.

[Monet X Change]

When they tried to swindle me. So do you want to come up off that popcorn? You want to come off that scepter?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I want the Peabody. If you do the Peabody, I'll do the scepter.

[Monet X Change]

The scepter. The All Stars. Five or four? Scepter six. Which one did you win? Three, two,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

seven.

[Monet X Change]

You're on five.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, but you said the one I just won, which is the 7:1.

[Monet X Change]

So you cannot change Nile changing my mind.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're not changing it? No. So you want.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You can change it when you want to and not change it when you want to. No, you said the photo or the

[Monet X Change]

one I just got once it's been agreed on. You tried to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Y', all. Y' all see this? This is Bob the Drag queen. We. He literally.

[Monet X Change]

These are negotiations. This is how negotiations work.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, this is just like you and Powers.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

You. You.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You were.

[Ad Voice / Narrator]

You.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Because you were out here becoming fucking Bob. Gbt. You wanted to fucking make my shit whack to match your shit.

[Monet X Change]

You were overpowered and you were taking advantage of Bob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They are omega level mutants. Dark Phoenix is not overpowered. There is a way to stop her. Magneto's not overpowered.

[Monet X Change]

You were overpowered. And just so you know, when we came to offer you a chance to be with us, we knew you were going to take it. And we had people ready to take you down. Because we know how people like you are. You're overpowered and we're going to take you down.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And we have other people. And now you play the game and

[Monet X Change]

you were playing with the right one. And you know how you can disable people's powers within. Within 50ft? We have. Somebody can do within 100ft. So you be down before you be down.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Bad I would write all that in

[Ryan Reynolds]

a very sternly written letter.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Nigga, you better sit over there because you damn a nigga. You're not even. AI. Bitch, you're fucking di.

[Monet X Change]

Ok.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Your raggedy ass.

[Monet X Change]

But just so you all know, the trampoline is not on yet because we have not reached the end of our negotiations. These are negotiations, Monet. And I think we've pretty much reached the end of the episode. So maybe next episode we will be able to reach an agreement. Maybe.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't want to reach no agreement with you.

[Monet X Change]

You don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We'll keep on talking. You know what? I'll have Patty negotiate for me. Patty negotiates all my deals. I believe it, too. What does that mean?

[Monet X Change]

It means what it means. Why would you try to. Why your head gotta move on?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, it means what it means.

[Monet X Change]

You don't mind when Trinity does it.

[Podcast Host / Ad Voice]

Oh, oh.

[Monet X Change]

But when Trinity does it, it's great. But when I do bothers you. Wow. Very different.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Anyway, this has been a great podcast. I have to go.

[Monet X Change]

I have to go, too. Be well, my dear.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I love you so much, Lila. My little Roberto baby.

[Monet X Change]

I love you too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Aw, honey.

[Podcast Host / Ad Voice]

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