The One Where We Test our Friendship

Summary

Sibling Rivalry Podcast

Episode: The One Where We Test Our Friendship

Hosts: Bob the Drag Queen & Monét X Change
Date: January 1, 2025

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Overview

In this hilarious, candid episode, Bob the Drag Queen and Monét X Change put their dynamic friendship to the test with a revealing friendship quiz facilitated by producer Jacob. Between playful reads, behind-the-scenes anecdotes, and drag queen banter, they explore what they (actually) know about each other, tackle fun pop culture tangents, and debate the finer points of ashy skin, favorite foods, and whether Bob would ever find love in his podcast DMs. Expect plenty of shade, inside jokes, and their trademark chaotic energy as they go head-to-head for the title of Superior Sibling!

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Post-Drag Race Lives & Moisturizing Discourse

• The episode opens with Bob and Monét catching up, with playful shade about Bob's "little live book event" (01:44), leading into a deep-dive on black culture and the anxiety around being ashy:
  • Contrast between ashy skin on light vs. dark skin (04:45)
  • "Why are we conditioned, Black people, to be so ashamed of our ash?" — Monét (06:02)
  • Bob highlights, "It says nothing about your character if you’re ashy... In fact, if anything, it means you probably showered" (03:48).
  • Anecdotes on who calls out ashiness, with Michelle Visage entering the chat (07:04).
• Discussion on drag styles and evolution, with “auntie drag” and Bob’s personal journey (07:26).

2. Pineapple, Semen, and Sexology Sidebar

• Naturally segueing from drag to sex talk, Bob and Monét digress about the lore of pineapple juice affecting the taste of semen:
  • Monét: "I wonder if it’s true that pineapple really does make your semen taste better." (09:56)
  • Bob: "It does, it does, it does. And my girlfriend in high school did say after working at Planet Smoothie, my nut tasted different." (10:12)
• Bob shares about pansexuality, dating women vs. men, and presents as "so gay" that dating women is rare, but "Gen Z would probably date you because they're so open" (10:55).

3. Friendship Dynamics, Gift-Giving, and Platonic Life Partners

• Explores love languages and gift-giving hangups:
  • Bob insists: "You and I are never changing gifts again... We gift each other through our actions." (16:24)
  • Monét negotiates for renewal of gift exchanges; discussion reveals deeper affection through acts of service (17:05).
  • Bickering over past airport pickups and displays of friendship (17:08–18:00).
  • Quasi-breakup: "Are we breaking up?" "Yes." "Are we not life partners anymore?" (18:07)
• Hype for upcoming projects: Bob's stint on The Traitors (Feb 9, Peacock) and Monét's tour.

4. The Friendship Quiz (21:03–47:58)

(Facilitated by Jacob)

• Format: Each host must answer questions about the other, revealing what they think their friend would say, not just their own answer.
• Memorable moments, debates, and classic sibling shade throughout.
• Notable exchanges:
  • Worst wig Monét ever wore (23:21): "The swimsuit wig." — Bob; "Domino really fucked me up with that." — Monét.
  • Unusual phrase Bob uses: "I reckon." — Bob (25:05); "This is wild." — Monét; "Reckon? I say reckon a lot. Do you say reckon?" — Bob (25:12)
  • Monét’s favorite video game (30:13): Bob guesses "Final Fantasy." Monét clarifies "Super Smash Brothers," though calls Final Fantasy X "the best video game of all time." (30:25)
    • Debate ensues: "French fries aren’t your favorite food just because you eat them every day!" — Bob (30:51)
  • Who’s better at friendship trivia: Bob ultimately claims victory, but Monét contests some points and Jacob is a mischievous judge.
  • Best memory together (44:44–45:30): Bob says "Shopping at West Side Market after gigs"; Monét recalls "queen with the Jamaican accent" moment.
  • Most drama together: Both agree, "Tamisha Iman." (47:20)

5. Random Fun and Pop Culture Tangents

• Drag Race Guest Judge Chat: "Are you excited that Katy Perry is the first judge on Drag Race?" "Not particularly, no." (19:35)
• Comparing Dave’s Hot Chicken vs. Raising Cane’s (40:00), with Bob’s passionate endorsement for Dave’s ("Dave’s hot is a better culinary experience than Raising Cane’s, for sure.")
• Who invented Post-its? Lisa Kudrow ("Google it." – Bob, 22:09. [Joke referencing Friends])
• Survivor card game and blood on the clock tower games (21:19)
• "Look at that sticky...It's getting sticky in here...Wow, you’re old." — Bob to Monét (32:00)
• Sibling Rivalry fans are invited to keep their own quiz scores and contribute in the comments.
  • “This is so Republican…not about taking the people. People could do their own. Choose their own people, senators and governors.” — Monét (32:20)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Ashy Shame:
  “Why are we conditioned, Black people, to be so ashamed of our ash? Like what happened to us that we’re so ashamed of being ashy?” — Monét (06:02)
• Semen & Pineapple:
  “I wonder if it’s true that if pineapple really does make your semen taste better.” — Monét (09:56)
  “It does, it does, it does. …My girlfriend in high school did say…my nut tasted different.” — Bob (10:12)
• Gift-Giving Debacle:
  “Until you accept your part in our last gift debacle, I don’t have the ability to accept.” — Bob (16:48)
• Airport Pickup Spat:
  “Let me be clear. I picked you up from the airport twice since living in LA. You have never picked me up from the airport.” — Monét (17:22)
• Friendship Dynamics:
  “Are we breaking up?” — Bob (18:07)
• Quiz Shenanigans:
  • “Should I write the delusional answer or the real one?” — Bob (23:11)
  • “What is a phrase Bob says too much?”
    “I reckon.” — Bob (25:05),
    “This is wild.” — Monét
  • “If Monet’s late, what’s the excuse?”
    “She doesn’t give an excuse or apologize. She just shows up and acts like she was on time the whole time.” — Bob (26:20)
  • “One of one.” — Monét (28:11)
  • “Wow, you’re old.” — Bob (32:05)
• Sibling Rivalry Energy:
  “We gift each other through our actions.” — Bob (17:05)
  "We’re platonic life partners!" — Ongoing theme
• Fan Engagement:
  “Comments, you all get to do your own scores. …That’s called democracy!” — Bob (32:13)
• Show Ending & Optimism:
  "I have a feeling when we do that [next quiz], it will be for a sold out audience at Radio City Music Hall." — Monét (48:49)
  “I am clairvoyant. That’s my new drag name.” — Bob (48:57)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:21] — Episode premise & preview (Pineapple/nut, friends quiz, key one-liners)
• [03:01–07:56] — Ashiness, skin, black culture, and the Michelle Visage "lotion up" anecdote
• [09:32–10:55] — Pineapple/sex talk, Bob’s pansexuality, changing tastes
• [16:18–18:11] — True friendship: acts of service vs. gifts, airport pickup drama, platonic partnership
• [21:03–47:58] — The Friendship Quiz (contains all main quiz Qs, debates, and memorable moments)
• [32:02] — “Wow, you’re old.” roast
• [44:44–45:30] — Bob’s favorite memory (West Side Market)
• [47:20] — "Tamisha Iman" = Peak Drama
• [48:49–49:14] — Reflection, future ambitions (joking about a sold-out show at Radio City Music Hall)

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Summary

This episode of Sibling Rivalry is packed with infectious chemistry, pointed shade, and a tongue-in-cheek quest for true friendship supremacy. It’s a delightful showcase of Bob and Monét’s banter, as they expose each other's quirks, reminisce, and bicker like the closest of platonic life partners. Whether dissecting the social politics of ashiness, debating which fast-food chicken slaps the hardest, or trying (and often failing) to ace the friendship quiz, their authentic bond and comedic timing make the episode both riotously funny and endearingly real.

For fans and newcomers alike, this episode is an unfiltered window into the magic (and mayhem) of siblinghood—drag queen style.

Transcript

[A]

I'm Kiana, and I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turned back. I can create a site with my eyes closed.

[B]

Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know,

[A]

and it thinks about the customer more than anything.

[B]

Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like I can't stop. I'm addicted. Start your free [e-mail].

[A]

close your eyes.

[C]

Exhale.

[A]

Feel your body relax. And let go of whatever you're carrying today.

[C]

Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts. Oh, my gosh. They're so fast.

[D]

And breathe.

[C]

Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste. Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order.

[A]

1-800-contacts.

[B]

My name is Bob the drag queen.

[A]

And I'm Monet x James, and this is simply rivalry.

[B]

On this week's episode, we found out how pineapple affects how you see men.

[A]

We do a friendship quiz and we

[B]

find out what made Monet say this. One of one.

[A]

And we find out what made Bob say this.

[B]

Wow, you're old.

[A]

How did your little book live go yesterday?

[B]

It went well. And if you all want to join the. The wave of sorry, not little.

[A]

How did your book. Your book.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I'm glad you clocked that live stream book fair.

[B]

I. This feels shady. Every time you. You're like your little. What was it? A book stre live. What was it called again?

[A]

Our book is lame.

[B]

I was on talk shop live.

[A]

Talk shop live.

[B]

Who has had people like Dolly Parton and Aerosmith.

[A]

And now Bob the drag queen.

[B]

And now Roberta Elaine the drag, the drug queen.

[A]

O. Do you. Do you see the movie with. No. That TV show Griselda with Sopia?

[B]

I've not seen it, but I've heard of it for sure.

[A]

It's so good.

[B]

What are you putting on your lips? What products is that?

[A]

I don't know. I got this in a package. It's called Therabody theraface renew lip balm.

[B]

Are you living?

[A]

No, but it's just here convenient. Oh, well, not to drag thera or whatever, but it's just here and I have it here and I haven't put anything else, so I'm using. I don't have Ashy lips. You know when. You know when you're talking to a nigga and they. And they lip. Mouth are just ashy and you want to be like, baby, here's some Carmax. Just take care of that.

[B]

I don't have too many friends with really ashy lips, but I have. But I have had the experience of talking to someone. Their lips are ashy. I mean, I've had my lips.

[A]

Yeah, me too. And the worst is when you feel your lips are ashy and then like, you. And like, you. You do the thing where you with your mouth and you wipe it. But, bitch, that last. That is. That is nothing but a band aid for three seconds. Because two, because a minute later your shit is.

[B]

And by the way, those of you at home.

[A]

No, no, no.

[B]

Don't lick your lips now. Don't lick your lips now. Girl, I hear y' all sitting there with a quick. You know what? For me, the. The most embarrassing right now when this gets ashy. It is, by the way, barely anyone's looking at that. Barely anyone's looking, but it feels very embarrassing.

[A]

But also when you see it, you can unsee. If I'm talking to somebody and we're talking and you're like, yeah, girl, because she went to. And I see it. I'm like, it's like, honestly, someone needs to do a sketch on that. My eyes now, I. I cannot see anything but that.

[B]

I don't know why I was in Florida. It must have been for Madonna, but. Or maybe it was Madonna. It was actually not Madonna. It was. It was this is wild tour. And I. I just. I just ran out. I ran out of lotion. I just ran out of lotion. And I was like, oh, I need to go get some lotion. And I was wearing shorts because it was. Florida was very, very hot. And I was like, I desperately need to get lotion. And then I was like, racing to the CVS to buy lotion. Race. Race into the CVS to buy lotion. And I was also kept being like, I can. No one can see me because my legs are so ashy. But then I stopp. Why am I rushing? It's just ash. Like, it doesn't say anything about your character and I'm going to fix the problem right now. Like, it says nothing about your character if you're ashy. Like, it doesn't mean you're bad, it doesn't mean you're dirty, it doesn't mean you're anything. In fact, if anything, it means you probably showered and didn't and didn't. You're undiry. You showered and you didn't put anything on your body. I got out of the shower and all the dark skinned girlies know what I'm talking about. And I was like, I was racing.

[A]

Oh, the dark skinned. Only dark skinned people get ashy.

[B]

Dark skinned people get actually at a much higher rate. And then you.

[A]

No, I think it's just black people. Because light skinned black people be mad ashy too.

[B]

All the darks and girlies are sounding off in the chat right now. I promise you we get ashy at a much more alarming rate. And it's. And it's much more in. The contrast is much stronger on darker skin.

[A]

I would say that that's true. That's true. Ashy. It's just the contrast is more is. The is is different. It's different.

[B]

All the darks and girls agree with me. This is the conversation I know everyone hates when I say and this is not up for discussion.

[A]

Oh my God, that person featured on was bad. He was like, every time, every time Bob says this is not up for debate, it really blah, blah, blah that shit. That was a funny moment for me.

[B]

But it's not up for debate. And dark skinned people, our ash is always called out.

[A]

Always.

[B]

Even if it's a hint. Even if it's like if you're not glistening and glowing. That's why. What's her name? Elsa Majimbo is on camera all the time slathering herself in oil. By the way, I, I was looking at her videos and I was like, she is like moisturizing while wearing jewelry. That sounds. That seems.

[A]

That's diabolical.

[B]

Insane.

[A]

Diabolical. Insane. No.

[B]

Which would be easier to get your bracelets off if they're covered in oil.

[A]

Lubricating your body with jewelry on. With bracelets on is great. It's honestly the worst part of lotioning up. Like when you, since you have jewelry as you don't take off, that's the worst part. But also why are we conditioned to be like, why, why are we conditioned black people to be so ashamed of our ash? Like what happened to us that we're so ashamed of being ashy?

[B]

I mean, I don't, I mean, I don't know. I think it is, I think it is actually within black culture. Because I gotta be honest, I don't think a white person has ever called me out for being ashy.

[A]

I was literally gonna ask, has a white. I was asking my next question. Has a white person ever, ever called you Ashy.

[B]

I mean, I didn't really grow up around a lot of white people. I didn't really meet a lot of white people until I went to college. So.

[D]

And.

[B]

And I've gotten called out less for being ashy as an adult than I was, than I. Than I had as a kid, I think because I was just less interested in moisturizing as a child. And I can remember one time Michelle Visage called Dieter Ritz ashy on tv. Well, she said. All she said was, lotion up, girl. Lotion up.

[A]

That is my favorite. Lotion up, girls, lotion up.

[B]

But I don't think she used the word ashy.

[A]

She did it, Bob. She did not call her ashy. Michelle was opting to part her lips with her best friend. Her. Her best friend sitting next to next talking about some ashy.

[B]

I mean, she did say I do ratchet drag.

[A]

She did say that.

[B]

She did say that, which I don't think has ever been true for me. But I think I do auntie drag, if anything. I mean, I think.

[A]

Okay, Bob, you do not always do auntie drag. I think your drag has, like, developed into auntie auntieism. But when I first met you, you were not auntie bitch. You were wearing leotards in the street with your ass cheeks out.

[B]

Yeah, I was doing. I want to be clear. I was doing it. I want to be clear. Let me be clear. I have. I was not always wearing leotards. I wear a leotard if I was doing, like, a show or something. But if. But if I was not doing a show, I was not going to, like, the glam awards in a leotard. That has never been part of. That has never been part of my thing or my brand. And if I'm doing anyone. When I did stand, even in the beginning, when I did stand up, I was wearing these, like, long skirts and these blouses and stuff. And even. But on Drag Race, I was also not doing any sort of quote, unquote, ratchet drag.

[A]

I agree. I agree. That was wild.

[B]

I've never done ratchet drag. My drag is. I think my drag is overwhelmingly untie. I mean, even. But I have moments where I'm wearing, like, like, catsuits or. Or I'm just like a football player. So, yeah, I've done moments where my drag is not consistently auntie drag. My drag is not as consistent. My drag is not as visually consistent as someone like Trixie or Bianca or Varla Jean Merman or. Or Bendela Creme or Benjam. Their. Their. Their Visual is much more throughline than mine. Jinx is mom drag Drinks does not drinks.

[A]

Drinks is. Drinks is hilarious.

[B]

Drinks. Monsoon drinks drink drinks too soon. But she doesn't drink anymore.

[A]

She doesn't. She's a sober girl. Well, sorry. I know she's sober, as a matter of fact.

[B]

I mean, I don't think Jinx is always high. I don't think Jinx is sober. Jinx is like notoriously high.

[A]

Yeah. There's a clip of her when her and Ginger Minj came on

[B]

your face.

[A]

Who's first?

[B]

Who came first, Jinx or Ginger?

[A]

You'd be surprised. What do you think?

[B]

I'd be shocked if it was. If it was. If it was Jinx, you nail it.

[A]

Ginger. Ginger did the first and it was sweet and tangy. Sweet.

[B]

Yeah. She seemed like she probably have sweet cum.

[A]

Have you tasted a nut that was like. You can tell that they smoke a lot of cigarettes.

[B]

You know, I don't really taste a lot of nut because if I'm going to swallow, it goes all the way down the gull. Like I slam it to the back and then I swallow. I don't swish. I don't. I don't catch the. The notes of cigarettes and the notes of nicot oak and tobacco. No, it is straight down the gullet. I want to back.

[A]

I wonder if it's true that if pineapple really does make your semen taste better.

[B]

It does, it does, it does.

[A]

But how much pineapple do you have to eat? Like you have to eat a pineapple a day. Keeps the nutty taffy and bay. Like, how much pineapple? Or is it if you take a shot of pineapple juice before you nut, does that affect it?

[B]

I used to work at. I think you have to be consistently eating pineapple. And I used to work at Planet Smoothie. And my girlfriend in high school did say that after working at Planet Smoothie, my nut tasted different.

[A]

Oh, my God. So you were just nothing in her mouth all the time?

[B]

Frequently enough that she could tell the difference.

[A]

I forget you had a girlfriend or you entertained just you a pan back in high school. I didn't know that about you.

[B]

You know, I've been pansexual my whole life, but I just present so gay that I don't really get a lot of opportunities with ladies. I was talking to my friend Jasmine the other day and I was like, I would date a woman, but I don't think a woman wants to date me. I am that gay. Like, I am like, you're gonna take me home to your family. You're gonna take me. You're gonna take me home to your family? My drag queen ass.

[A]

You probably take a Gen Zer, probably. A Gen Z would probably date you because they're so open and shit, but a millennial queer person, I don't think they'll be interested. I don't think a millennial woman who's interested in dating a dude would wanna. Would date you. But a Gen Z, for sure.

[B]

But they always act like they're in somebody. I don't think y' all are. Y' all not about that life. Because I am gay. Gay.

[A]

Well, every time you say this, they sign off in the comments like, I'll date you, Bob. So you have a lot of offers in the comments. A lot of whatever. Last time you said this on the podcast, you had a lot of offers in the podcast. Did you act on any of them?

[B]

I didn't. Well, I did not act on any of them, no. But they were like, when am I supposed to go to comments? Be like, meet me at a million on Thursday.

[A]

There are stranger ways to find love. AKA Grindr. Or, I mean, honestly, this is probably.

[B]

Grinder is not a strange way to find. I think a lot of people actually find love. By the way, quick, not to say it before, but you can go to read the. Read the drag queen.com to buy my book. I really wanna be a New York Times bestseller. So you can go to readthedragqueen.com and get your book.

[A]

Yeah, wait. Oh, yeah. Ash. I was gonna say. So in terms of being called ashy, I definitely like the white people. Don't call me ashy. Were the white people in my middle school that probably also said the N word too. Like, when we do, like, little, like, roast battles, they're like, yeah, nigga, yeah, nigga. That's why you ashy as fuck. Like, that was a thing that existed. I mean, can I remember? But no, not a specific. Not a specific instance, but if there was a white person back then that called me ashy, they probably also said the N word.

[B]

The white people in my neighborhoods did not say the N word. I think it's different in the south than it is in the North. We have a much stronger, a much different connection to that word than I think you do in the North. Yeah. And there were white people, but they were also, like, they were not, quote, they were not wiggers. The white people at my school were like, country ass. We had a. I remember Billy Joe. Oh, it's coming. Look at this. Look at the look, look up, look up. Look up at a light. You have to look at a light and it'll come. Anyway, we had Billy. I remember Billy Joe was at my school.

[A]

Billy Joe. That is a country ass nigga. Billy Joe.

[B]

We had. We had a trip.

[A]

That is a country ass name trip.

[B]

And then everyone else, we just kind of called Becky and Brad.

[A]

I don't know any white people. Like, I mean, so I don't know black people. And again, I'm sure they're out there, but with like, names like that, like Molly Ray or Bobby Lou or.

[B]

My mom's name is Martha Anna.

[A]

Martha Anna. That doesn't have the same thing as.

[B]

And my grandmother's name is Mary Elizabeth.

[A]

That doesn't have the same energy as Mary Louise or Billy Ray.

[B]

I mean, I think it does, but what do I know? I'm just some country. I'm just some country bumpkin living in Los Angeles, California these days. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

Do you have a middle name? Yeah, Chris. Christopher. Christopher Del Mar.

[B]

Yeah. The fact that you had to think that her middle name is really upsetting you.

[A]

Do you know my middle name?

[B]

Evan Hakeem Burton.

[A]

How do you spell Akeem, though?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

That's not Hakeem.

[B]

I said Akeem. And it's probably a K E E M. And there's probably like a sponge emoji in there or something with an apple.

[A]

Corey King. They're doing press week this week and today. Corey King, dwarf a white pussycat wig with her spongely. I'm obsessed with Corey King.

[B]

Is it Is. Did I spell your name correctly?

[A]

You did spell it correctly.

[B]

Now spell my middle name.

[A]

D E L, M A R. Fucking cdc. Fucking dangerous.

[B]

D E L A M A R. Delamar. But it's pronounced Del Mar.

[A]

I thought it was D L M A R. No.

[B]

D L A M A R. Well, I know. I know way more about you than you know about this. Do you know my birthday?

[A]

We literally did a thing on the

[B]

podcast and I won my birthday quickly.

[A]

June 22. June 26. Nigga, June 22. No, my mom is June 26. You're June 22.

[B]

Which one is it, Mo?

[A]

You're June 22. What is mine? It's cheap that you don't mind because your fucking boyfriend has the same birthday. So that's not fair.

[B]

Okay, so you know mine. Cause mine is four days before your mom, so. So there it is, Bob.

[A]

We literally did a game on the podcast and I won. I know way more about you than

[B]

I think it's time for round two. I think it's time for round two. February 16th. Wrong.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Your birthday is February 16th, Jacob. We'll talk about it after the break.

[C]

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[B]

February 19th. Okay, I got it a few days off.

[A]

I cannot believe you did that. I'm so offended.

[B]

We don't get each other gifts, so

[A]

I want to get you gifts, but you don't want to do gifts.

[B]

No, I don't. I don't want. I don't want to. I don't want to ever change gifts to you again.

[A]

You sound like. You sound like Tina Turner. And what's love got to do with It? I don't want you. I don't want you. I don't want you. No, no, no. That's an American, American dream.

[B]

I'm getting Andy a gift this year, so it feels weird to not get you one.

[A]

Should we get Andy a gift?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why?

[B]

It's just based on, like, a joke that we had on the road.

[A]

Are you gonna bring it to the holiday party?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Got it. I'm excited.

[B]

It's not a great gift, but I think that it's okay.

[A]

Bob, can we. Okay, so can we.

[B]

No. Never again. You and I are never changing gifts again, Bob. Ever again.

[A]

Can I finish my motherfucking sentence?

[B]

Go ahead.

[A]

Jacob, can you mute for a second? I want to. I think that in the tenure of our friendship, I think we can come to a place where now we understand each other better. And I would like to engage in the spirit of love. Cheering gift giving with each other until

[B]

you accept your part in our last gift debacle, I don't have the ability to accept.

[A]

What is the part you want me to accept? Accept.

[B]

And if I have to tell you, then we really can't have the conversation. I don't want any gifts from you, one. And I don't want to give you any gifts. We do acts of service for each other. We gift each other through our actions.

[A]

I do. And I do lots of acts of service for you.

[B]

Yeah, same kiddo. I did actually pick you from the airport and you refused. That was pretty upsetting because I. I didn't.

[A]

I could not drive at that point.

[B]

What about the other times? You like going to the airport a lot?

[A]

Bob, I have picked you up from the. Let's be very clear.

[B]

Let me be clear.

[A]

I picked you up from the airport twice since living in la. You have never picked me up from the airport.

[B]

You never asked me to.

[A]

I have asked you to before.

[B]

When?

[A]

I have asked. You picked me from the airport when

[B]

I was out of town.

[A]

No, I don't. I don't think you were out of town.

[B]

You've never asked me. And I said no, that's not. That's not.

[A]

No, because you couldn't do it. You had something else going on, which is fair. But I have asked you also.

[B]

The difference is I have never had a partner. Well, that's not true. Yeah, I was gonna say I never. I was gonna say I never had a partner who could drive, but Jacob doesn't drive, so what does that have

[A]

to do with you picking me up?

[B]

Well, you have a partner who can drive, so.

[A]

I don't care about my partner. So are you not my. So are you not my.

[B]

You don't care about your partner?

[A]

So are you. So are you not my platonic life partner?

[B]

I don't care.

[A]

So we're. So we're. So we're not. We're not doing that anymore?

[B]

No, we're still okay. Oh, are we breaking up?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Are we not life partners anymore?

[A]

I mean, you said it.

[B]

I. I did not say that. That's. That's literally not what I said. You said it, actually.

[A]

And then you said.

[B]

And then you gaslit me and said that. I said it. February, January 9, the traders will be coming out on Peacock. It's gonna be a key. Key. They released another trailer today.

[A]

I saw it. I saw it. It looks good. I can't wait. It's become one of my favorite shows. I. I watched season one, season two, I watched the UK season. I'm very excited for the season.

[B]

I keep saying stuff that I do not remember saying. They keep airing me saying stuff. I'm like, when did I say that? I have a thirst for blood. When did I say that? What was I going through? Girl, I will bury you under the sand. What was. What is happening, Bob?

[A]

This is what we hear every. This is what we hear almost every other podcast episode.

[B]

This is.

[A]

You're seeing the real you know, we. But we done been seeing. That is a real Bob the Drag Queen.

[B]

I will. I will bury you under the sand. My God, that feels so. That sounds so upsetting.

[A]

So, yes, this. This. This the. Y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

Y' all have seen the real Bob the motherfucking Drag Queen. That's what y' all seen on the desk. That's what you're going to see in the Traders.

[B]

Maybe you'll see the real Bob the Drag Queen on the traitors on February 9th on a peacock. You know the Katy Perry song, the Woo. The Katy Perry song. Peacock.

[A]

Let me see your peacock. Peacock. I don't even remember when I saw.

[B]

I want to see your peacock cock cock. Your peacock cock. Your peacock cock, cock. Your peacock cock.

[A]

Are you excited that Katy Perry is the first judge on Drag Race?

[B]

I mean, not particularly, no.

[A]

Yeah, me either.

[B]

I mean, Katy Perry is a millennial icon.

[A]

She is for sure. She. She has a lot of number one hits. She. Katy Perry used to give us club bangers.

[B]

Now Katy writes the hits. Katie truly writes the hits. Katie Gaga, Beyonce. Well, Beyonce writes, but I guess she writes. Yeah, but I think not. Not at the way that. That some of the other, Like Alicia Keys. Who's like. Right. Like, who are the. Like Mariah Carey. They write the hits.

[A]

Yeah. January 9th must be an iconic day, because that's also the first day of my tour. That's. I'm going to be in Seattle at the Neptune Theater. So if you're in Seattle, January 9th. So. So. So here. Here's what you're going to do on January 9th, okay? You're going to cause my shows at 8pm Pacific Standard Time, and Peacock. Does Peacock air at a time or does it just come out, like, shows that stream. Does it come out?

[B]

I think it drops at. I think it drops at 3:00am Eastern.

[A]

Okay, so what's happening, y'?

[C]

All?

[A]

Perfect night.

[B]

I think that is, y'. All. That is not a science. I think you dropped it, by the way. Yeah, I think so.

[A]

Let's go with that assumption. So what you're gonna do is you're gonna go for a nice dinner, then you're gonna head over to my show at the Neptune Theater. I'm gonna make you laugh, cry. It's gonna be everything, gonna go home, and by that time it's gonna be 11:30, shower, brush your teeth, get in bed, and stream the Traders, like, immediately, y'. All.

[B]

Jake, Jacob, do we have to write these down or can we use our computer screens?

[D]

I feel like writing down is maybe better because you could technically type something in and change your answer and Monet would really trust each other.

[B]

I'm writing my thing down and Monet would let me grab myself something to write on to make to keep Monet honest, which we know is a full time job.

[A]

Whatever. Would you ever play Blood on the Clock Tower, Jacob? It's a fun game.

[D]

I. I've heard of it. I've never played it before, but I've been meaning to. Also Survivor just announced they're doing. They have a Survivor like card strategy game.

[A]

Oh, really?

[D]

Yeah, it's like official official Survivor card strategy game.

[A]

What the does a Survivor card strategy game look like? That sounds so.

[D]

I mean, I think it's like, it's the idea of survivors, so I think there's betrayal, there's voting people out. There is.

[B]

It is hard to find paper like in your office who has paper laying

[A]

around, but just get like a post it. Like, don't waste a whole headshot.

[B]

I have to. There's no. I don't have Post its. No, I do have post its on my desk. Hold on. Okay, I found Post its. Do you know Lisa Kruger invented Post its?

[A]

What?

[B]

Lisa Kudrow invented Post its. Really? Yeah, from friends. Google it.

[A]

All right, let's go.

[D]

Okay, so I'm going to ask you a question. You're going to write down what you think the other person would answer for themselves. Okay, so it's not.

[B]

So the first question, to be clear, we have to write two answers. The answer for them and the answer for us. So to make sure the person is not changing their answer. So at the top, write down the answer for you. At the bottom, write down the answer for me.

[A]

But aren't we just doing it back and forth so you don't have to. So he'll go, bob and I write down the answer and you reveal that's

[D]

how I think that makes more sense. That would probably be a little bit quicker. Okay, so, Bob, what is the worst wig that Monet has ever worn?

[B]

In her opinion, right?

[D]

Yeah, in her opinion.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Should I write the delusional answer or the real one?

[D]

Whatever one is you think is going to get you a point.

[B]

Okay, I'm ready.

[A]

One, two, three.

[B]

The swimsuit wig.

[A]

Yeah, I said the green. The auto.

[B]

I could agree with that.

[A]

I could agree with that. Domino really fucked me up with that.

[B]

Stop blaming Domino.

[A]

Domino did do that wig.

[B]

What's your part, Monet?

[A]

What was my part in it?

[D]

How.

[B]

How did you travel with the wig?

[A]

I. How? He told me to. I Stuffed the calf and I put in a motherfucking suitcase.

[B]

It's like, you tell me when. When you swear up and down that. When you swear up and down that that wig that Marco made for me could not have possibly. Like, that is exactly how the wig looked the first time Marco made it. You're like, don't say it's Marco. That was Marco's vision.

[A]

And what is your part in that wig, then?

[B]

Me and Marco both think the wig looks amazing. I want to be very clear. Me and Marco are on the same page. It is a fantastic wig. Iconic, even.

[A]

Next question. Where is he? Well, nigga, you got ants in your pants. Sit down.

[B]

I'm listening. I don't know what happened. I'm listening. I just got a Sharpie instead of the. Because this doesn't show.

[D]

Well, Monet, what is a unusual word or phrase that Bob says? Too much

[A]

unusual word or phrase? Yeah.

[D]

Is there like some, you know, something like a phrase that Bob uses often? Maybe not too much. Just like, often and frequently that is not used by a lot of people or a majority of people.

[B]

I'm already about to eat this up, by the way. I want to be clear to y'. All. I'm also a fortune teller, and I can tell the future Monet is going to make up excuses why she lost this, this round.

[A]

No, I'm not.

[B]

She's going to blame Jacob. She's going to say that we're colluding. There's going to be some sort of tomfoolery.

[A]

I will say this is an easier question, but go ahead. I'm ready.

[B]

As.

[A]

As predicted. I'm ready. I'm ready.

[B]

Yeah. You ready?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I wrote a reckon.

[A]

I said, this is wild.

[B]

Reckon. I say reckon. Yeah, I reckon so. Whenever I say reckon, someone's like, reckon.

[A]

Even Jacob is like, what? Okay.

[B]

I say, you are always like, reckon. I say reckon a lot. Do you say reckon?

[A]

No. Okay. I was. I would say, by Jacob and I both being like, what?

[B]

That.

[A]

That is a strange answer.

[B]

Do you say reckon?

[A]

I do. I say it sometimes.

[B]

Okay. I reckon so.

[D]

Sure.

[B]

Andy.

[A]

Eddie. This is literally Andy. Bob.

[B]

What are you losing? Accept it.

[A]

Well, I will say Jacob and I

[B]

were both like, what?

[A]

Jacob? Am I Jacob, Am I crazy?

[D]

I would say, having known you for the amount of time I've known you, I. This is wild, I feel like. Is what I associate with you more than the word reckon.

[B]

This is wild fucking tour about it. I don't think this is wild as an unusual phrase.

[A]

No, but he said. Or you say all the time.

[B]

Is it an unusual phrase that you see all the time?

[A]

That is unusual.

[B]

I don't think it's unusual. What do you want from me anyway? This is wild. It's not unusual.

[A]

Next question.

[B]

And what's wild is how you're acting right now.

[A]

Next fucking question is. Fucking bitch.

[D]

Okay, Bob Monet is running late to something. What is the excuse that she's most likely to give?

[B]

I have my answer.

[A]

But I have mine as well.

[B]

I said, she doesn't give an excuse or apologize. She just shows up and act like she was on time the whole time.

[A]

This just sounds like a read. It sounds like you were.

[B]

You were.

[A]

You don't give, like, a character.

[B]

You just show up. You just show up like you. You show up like you was on time.

[A]

You're like, hey, everyone, this is like a personal attack. I said, andy, if I'm late, Andy usually made me late.

[B]

What about before you met Andy?

[A]

He was still the reason why.

[B]

This. I'm gonna say mine is.

[D]

Is.

[B]

Is basically that Mon. Monet never. Monet does not say. Monet does not acknowledge she's late. Monet.

[A]

The other day, for the movies with Bob Cameo, and I. I literally texted like, hey, I'm running late. And I literally texted, and I was like, here's a ticket of the pictures for the movie so you can go and sit without me. Bob was like, and then you ended up being late.

[B]

I was not late. We met you in the parking lot.

[A]

No, nigga, I was sitting in my seat. Are you drunk?

[B]

Also, no, we weren't late yet. I was there. We saw every trailer.

[A]

No, you didn't. The movie started. The thing started at 11. Y' all got there at 11:15.

[B]

Well, you said you were late, so we started going late. You were like, I'm running late. We were like. We were like, hey, let's just slow down. Monet's not running late.

[A]

Anyway, continue.

[B]

One, one.

[A]

Well, one. Zero.

[D]

Yeah, I'm actually. I'm giving Monet a point for. This is wild, because I think that was.

[B]

Monet got it wrong. You cannot give Monet a point. That is not correct. You don't just give out points for someone's wrong. This.

[D]

This is.

[C]

This.

[A]

This is Mario Party Jamboree, and Jacob gets to give stars.

[B]

No, I'm gonna. That is an invalid point. Monet's not getting a point for. That's Monet.

[D]

What is Bob's most frequently used emoji?

[B]

He doesn't like emojis. I use emojis. I'm just gonna do it with my face because I can't draw it.

[A]

Ok. What? I said this. The winky smiley face.

[B]

Ah, yes. I did it. Yeah.

[D]

That's.

[B]

What.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

One.

[A]

One. I'm one of one. No, you're one.

[B]

One of one.

[A]

But you make fun of me when I, when I post on the Patreon. You're like, y', all, y' all know, y' all know that, that Monet did a post because they have emojis in it. Like, you don't use emojis.

[B]

I don't do that in the Patreon. I, I use. I use emojis when I'm texting people. And the truth is I actually use a heart more, but I, I don't really consider a heart an emoji for some reason.

[A]

Okay, next question.

[D]

And we'll be back with more questions after a brief word from our sponsors. Take it away.

[C]

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[D]

And we're back. All right, Bob, what is Monet's favorite video game?

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Hmm. Got it.

[A]

One, two, three.

[B]

Final Fantasy.

[A]

No. Super Smash Brothers.

[B]

I feel like you play Final Fantasy a lot.

[A]

No, I mean, I played it, but I. I played Super Smash Brothers every day. Literally every day.

[B]

Like you're obsessed with. With Final Fantasy.

[A]

I think. I feel, I still think Final Fantasy 10 is the best video game of all time.

[B]

That's what I'm getting at. It's your. It's the best video game of all Time.

[A]

No, but my favorite video game that I'm playing all. I'm literally playing Smash Brothers every day. I'm.

[B]

The question wasn't which one do you play the most? This was your favorite. You said it's the greatest video game of all time. That feels like a point if you're giving out points for Monet's haphazard answers. Monet literally said the best video game of all time is Final Fantasy.

[A]

But. But Smash is my favorite. I think.

[B]

But just because you eat French fries every day doesn't mean it's your favorite food.

[A]

I would think so.

[B]

No. If. If, like, let's say, for example, Cordon bleu is your favorite food, but you can't eat it every day. But you can eat French fries every day. What if you drink water every day? Is water your favorite drink?

[A]

What is with you and fucking Cordon Bleu? You have worked Cordon Bleu into like three podcasts now.

[B]

Literally two episodes. And it's because we just recently spoke about it and you bought it up, by the way. No, I think I brought it up.

[A]

You brought it up.

[B]

One on one. I just want to be clear that you just said it is the best video game of all time. And you're like, not my favorite, but it is my. It is the best video game of all time. I. You know, I'm. I'm not going to force you to give me the point because that feels like I'm not trying to force you. But you did acknowledge that Final Fantasy is the best video game of all time, which you have said out loud several times.

[A]

But I will say Final Fantasy, as will say super Smash Brothers is my favorite video game. Cuz also, Smash Brothers is my. Is my first video game I ever. Really. Well, not. But in college, like, that's why it became my favorite video game. So Smash Brothers, for me.

[B]

I see we're being funny. We're not being funny unless I notoriously can be hilarious. Let's get funny. It's getting funny. It's getting funny. Look at that sticky.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

It's getting sticky in his. Sticky. You don't know that song? Wow, you're old.

[A]

Probably. Okay, next question. Two to one. Listen.

[B]

Comments. You all get to do your own scores. And I want to. We're going to hear the official. But then the comments. You're going to do your own scores.

[D]

Right now you're tied.

[A]

This is so Republican. Not about taking the people. People could do their own. Choose their own people. Senators and governors.

[B]

Yeah, that's called democracy. We choose our own senators. You got us, Mo. You got us.

[A]

We choose them. But y' all are not accepting the results of the election. And that's the problem.

[B]

Continue, Jacob. Give the next question, Monet.

[D]

What non drag related subject would Bob be able to teach a college course on?

[A]

Ooh. What non related drag. Say it again.

[D]

What non drag related subject would Bob be able to teach a college course? More like expertise. Like, what is a one non drag related topic that Bob could talk about forever that he could. Had know so much about he could teach a college course on?

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Ready?

[A]

One, two, three.

[B]

Wrestling. Comedy wrestling. I love wrestling.

[A]

You're literally a stand up comedian for a living.

[B]

I could talk about the history of wrestling for hours and hours. And my. My. One of my original career paths was easy to be a commentator. Like an announcer for. I mean, a commentator for wrestling or a wrestler. But I was not big enough to be a wrestler.

[A]

One of those you like. Oh, God, he get it with the suplex. K's coming in.

[B]

Oh, literally. He broke him in half. Leave him alone. Triple H and me and Two Face and me and Ocean Kelly are. Those are my wrestling buddies. Those are my wrestling girlies. They love wrestling like I love wrestling.

[A]

This feels okay,

[D]

Bob, what household chore does Monet hate doing the most?

[B]

This was like a hard one, but I feel like my answer is correct and what Monat's gonna write down is bullshit, but go ahead.

[A]

No, I'm really thinking about what I hate doing the most.

[B]

I mean, I really have two answers, but I'm gonna give my official answer. Then I'm gonna give the one that I think is, you know, I'm raddy. I'm rad E. All right, my. My official answer.

[A]

One.

[B]

I have two. They're both right, though. That's the thing. They're both right.

[A]

Okay, let's see.

[B]

They're both right. My official answer is Monet likes doing chores. Monet likes cleaning. She doesn't. She's not bothered by household chores. Monet likes cleaning, but the unofficial answer is walking the dog.

[A]

Well, that's not a chore that I have to do. I mean, I help out with it. But I would say laundry again, but I will say your first answer. I would say I love doing chores. Like, I love cleaning up. But if I had to choose one that I hate the most, it's laundry. And that's what that was the question.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

The question was not what you.

[B]

I never get pissed things.

[A]

The question was, what do I. Which Also do I hate doing the most, and that's laundry money.

[B]

You had to wreck your brain for that one.

[A]

I know. I had to. I had to think about. I know you.

[B]

You like doing chores. I know you. I know your actual favorite video game. I know that you like doing chores. This is insane. I don't. I won't take the point. Even though I'm right. I won't take the point.

[D]

We're still tied as we. As we know. Our girl is forgetful, and sometimes it leaves things behind at the house. What is the thing that Bob leaves behind the most often?

[B]

Oh, I mean, this was like an easy one. It's getting sticky.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Oh, it's getting. It's getting. It's getting sticky in this. This feels like a very easy one.

[A]

What household item.

[D]

Just item. If he. If he's going somewhere, what does he

[B]

leave the house with? Household items. Who's taking household items out of the house? Oh, I left my toaster.

[A]

Okay, I'm going to say because literally it's happened three times since he's. This. This month. The Stanley Cup.

[B]

Oh, no, my phone. Oh, my God.

[A]

I was gonna write phone.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

So I. My secondly was gonna be phone. That was my secondary answer.

[B]

And the truth is, I. What I mostly do is I leave my phone in my car and I go up to the house. I always leave my phone in my car. When I go to a restaurant, I'm like, let me text. I'm like, oh, shadow left my phone in the car. Or. Or left my phone. I have to go back. I'm like, fuck, my phone.

[A]

I was gonna say phone, but I was like, how do you leave? Okay. Damn. Wow. We don't know each other at all. Well, actually, I did. I did write phone down. I just thought I knew you.

[B]

I knew that you love chores. I knew that your favorite video game was Final Fantasy.

[A]

I literally wrote phone.

[B]

I know.

[A]

You

[B]

keep. Keep it running. Running. Burning back, shorty. Whoop.

[D]

Bob, what time would Monet get to the airport for a flight that takes off at 12pm this is the only

[B]

correct answer, by the way, because the other day I went. I drove. Well, hands up, bitch. Then I drove free to the airport, and I was like, oh, well, this feels like the right time to drop someone off. I do not love waiting around at the airport, personally. And I have been flying for so long now that I pretty much. Unless you are running to. Unless you run. Unless there's, like, something unheard of, this amount of time will almost always get you through the airport and you will basically go through TSA and then walk straight to your gate with, like, five minutes to spare. Anyway, 11pm Close.

[A]

I do an hour before the flight and 15 minute buffer. So you were very close, because for international, bags cut off at an hour. For domestic, they cut off in 45 minutes.

[B]

It is international.

[A]

I know, but I'm just. I mean, you didn't say not international.

[B]

Wow. Also, 30 minutes is when bags cut off for domestic. On Delta, no.

[A]

JFK is 45. JFK and JFK is 45. Isn't that crazy? I found out the hard way.

[B]

The hard way. The hard way. Me found out the hard way.

[A]

Okay, next,

[D]

Monet, what is Bob's go to? Comfort food?

[A]

Ooh.

[B]

Jacob knows this. Jacob is yours. Eggs or did you just make eggs a lot?

[D]

I just make eggs a lot. Cause they're easy, and you can make them a lot of different ways, and they taste good no matter how you make them, but you can also, like, switch it up, and they're versatile.

[B]

What is your comfort food, Jacob?

[D]

My comfort food?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

You know, I'm trying to think. I feel like if I'm sick, like, I don't. I don't necessarily think I have a food that I identify as a comfort food unless I'm, like, specifically sick. But, like, I guess I would say, like, maybe, like, latkes and matzo ball soup, but, like, I'm not eating that all the time. But, like, I think for me, that, like, is comfortable. That feels like I'm comfort food.

[B]

You were really on a. On a matcha kick for a while. Not matcha. What's a little ice cream? Matcha ice cream. Remember?

[D]

A mochi.

[B]

Mochi. That's what it is.

[A]

I like mochi.

[B]

Are you ready?

[D]

Mo.

[A]

Okay, I said ramen with sriracha.

[B]

I do like that, but I like hot chicken.

[A]

Oh, my God. I really was, like, literally wrote this. Dave's hot chicken, but then I crumpled

[B]

it up when I don't. When I don't feel like making or doing or. I just want to just relax. And sometime I come home from a gig, and Jacob times Dave's hot chicken to arrive at the house at the same time as me.

[A]

That's hilarious.

[B]

Isn't that sweet?

[A]

That is very sweet.

[B]

I mean, he hasn't done it for a while. Well, that's because I'm eating healthy, trying to. Although. Although I fully had Dave's hot chicken the other day with Alfredo and Cameo,

[A]

I've never had Dave's hot chicken. Is it good?

[B]

Yeah, it's good. It's solidly good chicken.

[A]

Like better than Cane's.

[B]

I mean, it's a very different experience because Dave's Hot is. It's just such a different experience. But if I had to, they are both chicken, so I can compare them. I would say that Dave's Hot is a better culinary experience than raising cane's for sure. Because the chicken itself is good even if you don't dip it. And raising canes is fine if you don't dip it. But it's kind of like, what's the point? Like, raising canes is about the sauce. And Dave's has great sauce, do not get me wrong. But you could solidly eat a Dave's Hot chicken sandwich without a single bit of sauce and it would still be delicious.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

All right, Bob, if Monet could have any animal on the planet, like exotic animal, non typical pet. As a pet, what would she have?

[B]

And it has to be non typical. I just want to be clear.

[D]

Yes, any exotic animal. Or I guess not. I mean, like a crow could count, but not necessarily exotic.

[B]

She don't even know.

[A]

I really don't.

[B]

She don't even know which.

[A]

Anyway.

[D]

Okay, I can. I can give you another one.

[A]

It's another one. Because the answer is not. I don't want. I don't want nothing.

[D]

Bob, what's Monet's favorite holiday?

[A]

I don't even know.

[B]

God damn Monet.

[A]

I don't have a favorite holiday. I don't like Christmas.

[B]

Yeah, I don't think you have a fair holiday, but I do know that you like to eat in Thanksgiving.

[A]

I was going to say Thanksgiving. Sorry. Okay, so you know it'll give me Thanksgiving.

[B]

I know. I get the point.

[A]

Yeah, I'll give it.

[D]

We'll give it.

[B]

And I was gonna say a small, big cat. So not like a lion, but like maybe a serval.

[D]

An ocelot.

[B]

Yeah, an ocelot. Or a. Or a bobcat or a. Some sort of a lynx. You. I think you would like some sort of a large big cat, but not. So I got. I mean, that should be another point. But it's okay.

[A]

No, it's not. You just get Thanksgiving.

[B]

I say should be. It's okay. I'm playing fair.

[D]

Monet, if Bob could only drink one beverage for the rest of his life, what would it be? And water. Water is besides water. Water. And this other beverage.

[A]

Only drink one beverage for the rest of his life, what would it be?

[B]

I know what Monet's would be. What? Liquor.

[A]

But what specifically?

[B]

I feel like you're more of a tequila girly. Cabo.

[A]

I do like Cabo. What the hell is Cabo?

[B]

It's a tequila. I mean. Oh, is that what it is? Casamigos, Isn't Cabo a tequila? Did I make that up?

[A]

Ok, I'm ready.

[B]

What is the cost of Migosma?

[A]

You know, I don't know. How much?

[B]

Zero Coke Zero. There we go. I love a Coke Zero. My order on the plane. Can I get your drink before I take off? I would like a Coke Zero, please. No cup, no ice. Just the can. No cup, no ice.

[A]

Just the can.

[B]

The can.

[D]

Okay, what song is we're on? Bob, right? Yes, Bob. What song are you most likely to hear?

[B]

No, no, got it, Got it. I got it. Yeah.

[D]

What song are you most likely to hear Monet sing in the shower?

[B]

All right, I got it. Mo, write your song down.

[A]

Look what I got.

[B]

What is that?

[A]

Sidecar donut.

[B]

Oh, I would like a donut. Can you bring one over here?

[A]

I mean, I think. I think. Let me see what he brought me.

[B]

The answer should be yes. Regardless, I don't care if it's one donut. Bring it to me.

[A]

No, I mean, I said something for Wicked right now.

[B]

Oh. I said kill bill.

[A]

SZA's kill bill?

[B]

Nah, the. The.

[D]

The.

[B]

The whistling song from Kill Bill.

[A]

Ooh, seasonal flavors.

[B]

But also Wicked's not. I want to be clear. Wicked's not a song.

[A]

Anything wicked.

[B]

I was gonna say anything Sza, but that's not. I wanna be clear. That's not a song. Anything wicked is not a song. Just wanna be clear about that. You cheated. But it's okay. Cause I. I wasn't gonna write anything Sza.

[D]

I'm not eating on the podcast.

[B]

I could have written anything Sza, but I chose one of the three Sza

[A]

songs I know, and it's still wrong.

[B]

Wow. Monet hate Sza now confirmed. Sorry, Sz.

[D]

Okay, I'll do two more. All right, Monet, what is Bob's favorite memory with you?

[A]

Okay. I mean, I think so. I don't know if Bob gonna agree, but he won't stop.

[B]

Anyway, I don't think money's gonna guess this one, but I think with this a lot. I think with all the time. Actually, I wrote Shopping at the west side Market after the gigs. I used to love going to the west side Market with Monet after the gig. I still have my. My profile picture for Monet is still her at the west side market with two Kleenexes stuffed in her nose, wearing a $3 Rainbow 7$.

[A]

Pretty girl, catsuit.

[B]

What'd you put?

[A]

I wrote when the guy said the queen with the Jamaican accent.

[B]

That is very funny. But that was a memory. That was a memory I had with him.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You weren't really there for that, but did you love going to west side Market?

[A]

That was fun. That was cute. They had these have such good salad. I always got a salad, some chips, and a blondie from over there.

[B]

That was around the episode where Monet on the podcast. One of my favorite. One of my favorite Monet ridiculous moments is Monet on the podcast asserting that she only eats organic food and then dialing it back by the end and being like, I eat mostly. And then she goes, okay, sometimes I eat organic. Monet was like, I own. I said, monet, you own the eat organic. Then I went to the trash can, pulled out a pack of Skittles. Monet ate on the way there.

[A]

It was Starburst. It was Starburst. Starburst.

[B]

And when I ate on the way there, my name was like, I literally only eat organic food.

[A]

And we don't know our Starburst Organic. We don't even know.

[D]

No,

[B]

they're not. All right, go ahead, Jacob.

[A]

Last one. Wait, what's the. What's the score, Jacob?

[B]

Don't tell.

[D]

We're tied. We're. We're. You're both at one to one.

[A]

No, I got a second point. Oh. Oh.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

Tied. Got it. One, one. Got it. Ratio.

[D]

Okay. We did. Oh, yes. Is Monet's answering. Yeah, Monet. Yes. Wait. No, no. Sorry. It's Bob. Bob. What would Monet say is the most drama TR. You have ever been in together?

[A]

No, I. No, Bob was just guessing my. My answer.

[D]

Yeah. So you're going to write down what you would say, and he has to say what you would say.

[B]

How did you forget? We've been playing this game for 50 minutes. How'd you forget the game already? What's going on?

[A]

No, because now I'm guessing your answer is my answer.

[D]

The question is, what is the most. What is the most drama trouble you and Bob have been in together, and you're going to write down your answer, and Bob has to match it.

[A]

But that's what we just did. The Jamaican.

[B]

Monet, you are going to tell me what, in your opinion, is the most drama you and I have ever gotten in together, and then I'm guessing what you would say it is.

[A]

That's what we just did. You just guessed what I would say. Oh, no. Did we just do that?

[D]

No, you just guessed Bob's favorite memory.

[A]

Got it, got it, got it, got it.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

All right, I want to be clear. We did not get in this drama together, but Monet's going to say Tamisha Iman.

[A]

Tamisha Iman. I think we did get into it together.

[B]

No, that was just like. Just like on the podcast when you tried to assert that you and Ora Mayori had anything to do with me. Anything to do with me.

[A]

Tamisha, you were part of. Tamisha, don't. Don't try to act like you weren't. You were.

[B]

Now why am I in it?

[A]

You were part of that.

[B]

Now why am I in it?

[A]

So I think it's a game.

[B]

I won Mo.

[A]

That last one was a throwaway, but sure you won.

[D]

We had some close calls.

[B]

Did I not tell y' all that Monae was going to have a reason why she. Yeah, I am. I am. I Oda May.

[A]

Am I Oda Maeve Odoma?

[B]

You know I have an Odomae dress here.

[A]

I know you have the wig, too.

[B]

I have an Odomae dress and Odoma wig, and I've actually never, ever worn it.

[A]

You should wear it. Do us. You should, like, do it.

[B]

Well, I had a whole plan. I think I told y' all already. I had a plan for a podcast called the Complete Works of Whoopi Goldberg, where I go through every single episode, every single movie Whoopi's ever been in. But I just. I was trying to do it with people from the movies, and it became so hard to do.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I actually did a really cool interview with Deseretta, who played. Who played young Celie. Um, but yeah, anyway, Monat, I'm the victor, so I guess if you won last time, we're one to one. So maybe we'll do this again in a couple years and we'll see who. Who can do the tiebreaker.

[A]

And, you know, I have. I have a feeling when we do that one, it will be for a sold out audience at Radio City Music Hall. I just have a feeling. I just have a feeling.

[B]

Well, I am. I. I am Clairvoyant, which is my new drag name, so. Actually, no, it's not Radio City. It was Madison Square.

[A]

Madison Square. I have a feeling.

[B]

I have a vision. Just like a prophecy. I know it sounds truly crazy.

[A]

All right. If you're nice to me, I might bring that donut. The rest of that donut to you.

[B]

He bought you one donut.

[A]

He bought me two. He bought me one and a half.

[B]

And you've already.

[A]

He had one. We shared one and then I had one. But I don't really like a chocolate

[B]

donut, so you're gonna give me your what you don't like.

[A]

Perfect.

[B]

All right, I'll have your hand me downs. All right, thanks everyone.

[A]

Bye.

[C]

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