The One With Bob's Uncle

Summary

Podcast Summary: Sibling Rivalry – "The One With Bob's Uncle"

Date: August 7, 2023
Hosts: Bob the Drag Queen & Monét X Change
Special Guest: Uncle Steve (Bob's uncle, Stephan Caldwell)

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Episode Overview

This heartfelt and hilarious episode centers on family, queer history, and growing up Southern Black in America, as Bob and Monét welcome Bob’s Uncle Steve (“Uncle Stephon/Stefan/Steve Caldwell”) to the podcast. Through candid and lively conversation, they explore Uncle Steve’s colorful past, familial connections, queer lineage, Atlanta nightlife, clubbing in the ‘80s and ‘90s, RuPaul drag legend stories, and personal journeys of resilience and self-discovery. The trio dives into identity, coming out, family support, and the enduring importance of chosen and biological family in queer lives.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Introducing Uncle Steve & Family Connections

• [02:11] Bob: “Please welcome to our podcast, my Uncle Steve...my mom’s older brother.”
• Uncle Steve is embraced as family by both hosts—Bob (“Caldwell”) and Monét—and listeners are immersed immediately into the witty, teasing cadence of their interactions.
• The hosts clarify family tree dynamics and joke about each other’s knowledge of the family hierarchy.

2. The ‘Caldwell’ vs. ‘Alexander’ Surname Saga

• [03:38–05:49] Uncle Steve recounts the story of discovering that, legally, his surname is “Caldwell”—after having lived his whole life as “Alexander” due to a parental name change/adoption.
• “And when I go in there, they told me that I had to change my name to Caldwell because Caldwell is the last name on my birth certificate. That's my birth name. Stevie J. Caldwell.” — Uncle Steve [04:09]

3. Family Style, Drag, and Clothes

• Uncle Steve describes his flair for fashion at family events: “I had this big brooch on my...around my neck.” [06:07]
• The group riff on blouses, custom drag attire, and the perils of finding clothes for tall and/or plus-sized queens.
• Discussion of Bob’s custom wardrobe and Monet’s “rainbow” era.

4. Uncle Steve’s Drag Experience

• [09:11] Monet asks: “Uncle Steve, would you ever get in drag?”
• “I've been in drag. And yes, I would get in drag again. Even with this wooden leg... I was in drag at 19. I let these queens in Memphis work me up and they gave me this one stiff wig.” — Uncle Steve [09:17]
• Humorous recounting of early drag, makeshift shoes (flip-flops), and improvised padding with water balloons.

5. The Shooting, Recovery, and Resilience

• [11:28–19:54] Uncle Steve recounts being shot by a relative’s husband at age 20: “...he hit me at close range in my upper thigh, right below my buttocks and blew out my arteries...I was actually...two months before my 21st birthday.” [18:36]
• He explains his long health recovery, eventual amputation, and his battles with bitterness, drugs, and personal ownership over his journey:
  “…I was real bitter and angry…because I feel like I lost everything…the restaurant, you know, my wife died, everything.” — Uncle Steve [22:51]
• “But today I can say that I. I'm living today, you know...” [22:51]

6. Southern Black Family Life & Clubbing in the ’80s

• [13:36] Uncle Steve: "They called us Dream Team. There wasn’t a party if we weren’t there…the DJs loved us."
• Stories about clubbing, dancing troupes (Fashion’s Finest), and the centrality of clubs, performance, and kin in his young adult years.

7. Moving, Family Dynamics, and Queer Childhoods

• Bob and Uncle Steve recount moving between Mississippi, Georgia, and Alabama, often living in close quarters:
  “Me, Justin, Jr, Scotty and his, his wife at the time, Crystal, all living in a one bedroom apartment in LaGrange, Georgia...for a whole school year...” — Bob [26:03]
• They joke about family heirlooms (an ancient dresser and hamper) and raise issues of economic survival.

8. Drag, Gender Play, and Childhood Toys

• Bob’s love for Barbies and Easy-Bake Ovens, and the stealth required to play with them due to gendered expectations:
  "I used to play with in my closet. No one told me to, but I remember being like, I probably shouldn't play with these dolls." [50:15]
• Uncle Steve: “Chris actually already turned them on to Barbies too...trendsetter!” [50:46]

9. Coming Out, Family Acceptance, and Black Gay Roots

• Monet prompts: “So are you confirming that you are the reason that Bob got on Drag Race?” [32:25]
• Uncle Steve clarifies: “On his own merit. On his own merit, truly.” [32:49]
• Stories about recognizing queerness in children, family support, and stereotypes around interests and gender roles.

10. RuPaul in Atlanta, Freaknik, and Black Queer History

• Uncle Steve reminisces about Atlanta nightlife and crossing paths with RuPaul:
  “I was at clubs here in Atlanta with RuPaul…she carried her stuff around…I mean, her backpack, she posted her…her flyers for where…her shows.” — Uncle Steve [30:23]
• Stories about Freaknik, communal observation of wigs and weaves, and Black club culture’s vibrancy and audacity.

11. Religion, Bible Study, and Black Southern Christianity

• Monet and Bob playfully bicker about Bible study and church:
  “I tried to get Bob to do Bible study and to read scriptures...but it has not been received well.” — Monet [01:38, 42:10]
• Uncle Steve and Bob share about regular church attendance, evangelical explorations, and family faith traditions [42:23–42:47].

12. Identity, Code-Switching, and Survival

• Uncle Steve reveals how he used a Jamaican identity/code-switching as survival in the ATL gay scene:
  “So when Uncle Steve moved to Atlanta, he was…a Jamaican named Stepha.” — Bob [46:08] “Busted my bubble. Hear me? I was. I was.” — Uncle Steve [45:23]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Now the question is, did Monet get on Drag Race on her own merit? That's the real question. That's the real question, honey.” — Bob [32:49]
• "Chris kept us on our toes, everybody. I don't care who you were, Chris kept you on your toes. He didn't play the radio at 6 or 7, you hear me?" — Uncle Steve [32:10]
• “Even with this wooden leg… I would get in drag again.” — Uncle Steve [09:17]
• “I lost my leg four years later. I got shot two months before my 21st birthday. I lost my leg in 1984.” — Uncle Steve [19:46]
• “She skated around all through Midtown, all over, pushing up her…her flyers for where…her shows…She skated. I mean.” — Uncle Steve on RuPaul in Atlanta [30:29]
• “If you out there and you single and you are looking for a handsome uncle and father and grandfather, my Uncle Steve is a father and a grandfather as well.” — Bob [58:58]
• “Do you want her to live longer?” — Bob prompting Monet on her cat’s lifespan [41:33]
• “Stitch the labels together, honey. Make an outfit.” — Bob [55:30]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------------------| | 02:11 | Introduction of Uncle Steve to the podcast | | 03:38 | Uncle Steve’s surname story (Caldwell/Alexander) | | 09:11 | Uncle Steve’s early drag story | | 11:28 | The shooting, leg injury, and recovery | | 13:36 | ‘Dream Team’ family club stories | | 22:39 | Account of recovery, family conflict, personal growth | | 26:03 | Family moves, economic survival, tight living quarters | | 30:23 | Atlanta drag & RuPaul club history | | 32:49 | Did Bob & Monet get on Drag Race “on merit” question | | 42:10 | Bible study, childhood church stories | | 46:08 | Uncle Steve’s “Jamaican” persona in ATL | | 48:01 | Freaknik memories, sitting on the porch ‘spotting wigs’ | | 50:15 | Bob’s early gender play, Barbies, and hiding toys | | 55:30 | Stitching labels together: affirmation and pride | | 58:58 | Uncle Steve’s reflections on love, longing, and legacy |

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Final Reflections: Family, Legacy, and Queer Resilience

As the episode wraps, Uncle Steve shares love, encouragement, and pride for Bob, Monet, and queer kin everywhere:

"To see you guys standing...standing tall, and especially two black men together doing that...you hear me? And y'all have people that love y', all...and I've kind of eased up a little bit. I used to be very aggressive when, you know, I used to read for life...But I grew up, you know, and I can love unconditionally today.” — Uncle Steve [55:30, 57:54]

Overall Tone:
Warm, funny, intergenerational, Southern-Black-queer storytelling full of honesty, nostalgia, shade, support, and poignant life lessons.

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“Stitch the labels together, honey. Make an outfit.” — Bob [55:33]

Sibling Rivalry’s family expands in every sense—with love, memory, sass, and resilience woven together.

Transcript

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

My name is Bob the Drag Queen. And I'm Monet X Change. And this is simply rivalry.

[Monet X Change]

On today's episode, we talk about clubbing in the 80s.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We welcome my Uncle Steve to the podcast.

[Monet X Change]

And we find out what made Bob say this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now the question is, did Monet get on Drag Race on her own merit? That's the real question. And we found out what made Monet say this.

[Monet X Change]

I tried to get Bob to do Bible study and to read scriptures and stuff, but it has not been received well. And we find out what made Uncle Stephan say this.

[Uncle Steve]

Monier. He was already dragging people in. Everybody. I don't care who you were. Chris kept you on your toes. He didn't play the radio.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Macaroni X.

[Monet X Change]

You're not in the middle of your box.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel like I'm in the middle. How about. Hold on.

[Uncle Steve]

That's the middle.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Macaroni. Oh, Macaroni X. Hello. Do you mind if we do another episode with my family?

[Monet X Change]

I would love to do an episode with your family.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right. This time, I want to welcome your family. They're our family. Our family. That is correct.

[Uncle Steve]

You are.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You are accepted into our family. So please welcome to our podcast, my Uncle Steve. This is my mom's older brother. Her only older brother, actually, as a matter of fact.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, the only one. Cause Aunt Hazel is the oldest. You don't even know the family.

[Uncle Steve]

You don't even know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I said her only older brother. All of her other brothers younger than her.

[Monet X Change]

Right?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's what I said. My mom's only older brother. What are you correcting me on? Yeah, Exactly. Welcome, Uncle C, to the podcast, y'. All. Stephan, my uncle Stephon. Stephan.

[Monet X Change]

Stephan. And we are back with Uncle Steve. Hi, Uncle Steve. How you doing?

[Uncle Steve]

All right. Hey, Monet,

[Monet X Change]

how you doing?

[Uncle Steve]

I'm doing great. It's good to see you. Good to be a part of this session with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, you look like it's therapy. I don't know if this is therapy as much as it is drama and distress for me.

[Monet X Change]

Well, Uncle Steve, you know. So I know you've had trouble dealing with Caldwell for the past 37 years, and we want to open the floor, so you tell us how you feel.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Open these nuts, bitch. Listen,

[Monet X Change]

bitch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What the. And I just found out just yesterday that my Uncle Steve and I have the same. Last night, I just found this out.

[Uncle Steve]

Yes, Caldwell. Caldwell, yes. Oh, how is that? Stevie Caldwell.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I thought, so my whole life I thought his name was Steve J. Alexander. Steven J. Alexander. But then yesterday we were at the, at the clinic or the oncologist clinic, and the lady was like, Stephen called Mr. Caldwell. And I was like, she's talking to me. And I was like, your last name Caldwell. Can you tell us the story about how you. Because how I thought your last name was Alexander, but it's actually Caldwell.

[Uncle Steve]

It's really weird. Four years ago, me and Martha went to get my ID at the dmv and I'm just going along and I've been called, I've been Alexander all my life. And when I go in there, they told me that I had to change my name to Caldwell because Caldwell is the last name on my birth certificate. That's my birth name. Stevie J. Caldwell. And so Stevie J. Uh huh.

[Monet X Change]

That's from, he's from Lovin Hip hop. Stevie J.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What he do?

[Monet X Change]

Stevie J, He's a producer, I think. But Uncle Steve seems like a nice cvj. That Steviej, he's a mess. He always got something going on. He beating somebody up. He's crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not fighting nobody.

[Uncle Steve]

Ain't fighting nobody.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So he told you so you had. So after over 60 years, you don't have to change your name to Steve Caldwell.

[Uncle Steve]

Yes. And then my sister that went through his whole nine. I told you, they adopted me and to Caldwell Alexander. When my mother married my stepfather and I went all my life, all my life, even got married to a female and her last name is Alexander. And she's dead and gone now. But I'll be buried Caldwell. You know, I work.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you want to go back to being Alexander?

[Uncle Steve]

I, I, I did, but I looked at it in a Sense and said, I thought, you know what? God, you're doing a new thing. You know, you bring me back to my roots. I'm doing a new thing. And so I've been flowing with it. You know, I feel like I got a new life with it. Everything is going great.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, they say doing the old thing is actually doing the new thing. The way to do the new thing is to just do the first thing, and it's good.

[Monet X Change]

The last time I saw Uncle Steve, Uncle Steve, when I was down to helping y' all move, Uncle Steve was picking out his. His outfit for Justin's wedding. And I found out you didn't end

[Bob the Drag Queen]

up wearing that outfit.

[Uncle Steve]

I Monet, I didn't even wear it at all. I came up with this blue, navy blue. And I had this big brooch on my. Around my neck.

[Monet X Change]

It was cute.

[Uncle Steve]

I know I popped. I had a little hat thing going on thing. You know, I had. I had to snatch some of that, you know, and fill it in.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I keep saying, I want to

[Uncle Steve]

get with brown and blue thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We need to get matching suits or matching outfits. Me and Uncle Steve need to get matching outfits and do a whole. A whole photo shoot together.

[Monet X Change]

But why don't you wear the brown and blue one that you were telling me about? What happened?

[Uncle Steve]

I did wear the brown. Blue. I didn't wear brown and blue. I wore. Then my brother, other brother came, said, no, I want to take you and get another suit. So I went and got the blue suit, but I wore the hat. And then I got this satin shirt. I was going to say blouse, but

[Bob the Drag Queen]

sure, blouse is a blouse. Whenever I'm carrying a purse, someone always try to be like, your. You want me to grab your bag? I'd be like, it's a purse, it's a purse. Or if I'm wearing a. If I'm out of Dragon, I'm wearing a dress. They'd be like, oh, your. Your tunic, your garment. And I'm like, it's a dress. You can call it a dress. It's a dress. Mary. I'm wearing a dress. It's giving dress. You know, we have that friend, you know, if y' all don't know our friend Nick, we should have. Oh, my God. I keep saying we should have Bibbidi Bob. We should really have Nick on the podcast one day. Nick.

[Monet X Change]

Nicholas. I'm not talking Nicholas.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Almost elusively blouses. Like, Nick wears almost only women's shirts, which is funn because Nick is 6 foot 4, 6 foot 5. I don't know where he's getting these women's clothes from because Nick is so tall.

[Monet X Change]

They're tall women, Bob.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes, I know. I know that Monat. They're in my family. The tall women are in my family. But I'm just saying.

[Monet X Change]

It's you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's me. It. Me. But, but, but those clothes are kind of hard to find, though. But also, sometimes if you're. If you can wear like, like, clothes for, like, bigger ladies to also match being tall as well.

[Monet X Change]

Also, the fans dragged you last week talking about some. Oh, Monet. Back when Monet used to wear rainbows, someone was like, you were literally wearing rainbow in the clip before. I was like, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

First of all, when have I. When have I been wearing rainbow? When you've never worn rainbow. I did not know the person said. What the person said was, how are you going to drag one if wear rainbow when you still wear rainbow? And you, you know, I do not wear rainbow on today. Every drag item I own is literally custom. And you know, this is a fact. I don't know why you. I don't know why you fixing your. I don't know why you fixing your little face to try to make that.

[Monet X Change]

That burnt orange dress with the spaghetti straps and when you wear the glasses with that updo. Was that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You mean that dress from four years ago? I said today. I said today. They dress from four years ago. No, it's not.

[Monet X Change]

Are you wearing a dress today? So if, if we're going to be literal. Let's be literal.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, what I'm wearing in these, in this day and age, someone. Someone said, these days, you still wearing it to this day? So we're talking about this day. And you know that I have. Every item in my closet, honey, is custom. Mama.

[Monet X Change]

Uncle Steve, would you ever get in drag? Have you ever been in drags? And would you get in drags?

[Uncle Steve]

I've been in drag. And yes, I would get in drag again. Even with this wooden leg. I would, you know, I'm serious. I got dragged. I was in drag at 19. I let these queens in Memphis work me up and they gave me this one stiff wig.

[Monet X Change]

Wig.

[Uncle Steve]

It was short, the stiff wig those weeks the girls, street girls were wearing back in the day, and that's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I've been worn back in the day.

[Monet X Change]

I wear it today.

[Uncle Steve]

Then I didn't even. They didn't have any shoes for me because all they were a little smaller than me. So me and another tall queen, we had to put on these flip flops. So I had.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's what Monet's doing.

[Uncle Steve]

So I had on some Braxton Braxton jeans from back in the day. And I had this Braxton jeans.

[Monet X Change]

What kind of Russ Braxton jeans?

[Uncle Steve]

It was called Braxton's.

[Monet X Change]

Oh, okay. Like, it's like a brand cut knockoff.

[Uncle Steve]

And my cousin's wife gave me a blouse to wear, you know. And then I couldn't do them, the water balloons, because my. The bras. I was using somebody else's bra and the bra wasn't really big enough for me. So what they did, they had me wear these. They blowed up the balloons a little bit to give me just a little. A little something, you know,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was thinking that, like. Cause I always. First to clarify what my uncle Steve says when my uncle Steve, who, Who. Who has divulges. I'm not. I'm not stealing his tea. Uncle Steve has artificial foot. Well, you have two legs. I mean, it's like from the knee down. Like a little bit. Like a little bit from the. So he has two thighs, but he has one foot?

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, that part.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, he has one. One shin, two knees. There we go.

[Uncle Steve]

That's it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, two knees, but he has one shin. And it was a. It was a. It was a. Like an accident you had. What was a. It was like a shooting.

[Uncle Steve]

Shooting. Actually. I had just did this fabulous show with the Barcades. And.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What's the Barcades?

[Uncle Steve]

They were R B group back in the days out of Memphis. You all remember Ohio Players and all them Johnson brothers and this and that. Parliament, they was in that range. And they came to Corinth and we had. Me and Chris's mama. We had a dance group called Fashion's Finest and we performed all over the city.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, that's the ring. Y' all remember in the last episode we told y' all about Michael Steve? And listen, that's not even the reason. That's just the text messages. Wait till the call comes through.

[Monet X Change]

I did hear it, but I thought the phone was here or something like that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know if this connected to the. To the house speakers or what, but it is popping.

[Uncle Steve]

But yes. And we. We performed then. I performed that night. And we did the Zag Nuts. We did Whip It Y'. All. Y' all ever heard the song like Whip It Good? Yes, we did that. And we stripped out our clothes. We stripped down to the black and white swim shorts, you know?

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Uncle Steve]

And then the girls swooped down to the black and white two piece.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

My mom did it too.

[Uncle Steve]

No, not your mom. Their mom. To dance that night.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She used to dance with the group though?

[Uncle Steve]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

No, she was.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She was tripping.

[Uncle Steve]

She had on tights and things and she. I danced and they would fly into our arms. They would jump and fly into our arms. We twirl them around over our head, you know, my mom, just for the

[Bob the Drag Queen]

best that we was stripping. Well, my mom, we used to have a trollhead in my own house that my mom used to have. That one Hot Pants. That was a 1982 hot pants competition. I'll never forget this trophy which is sitting on our Mantle in the 90s. And my mom won Miss Hot Pants in 1982. She was little Miss Hot Pants Car rent.

[Uncle Steve]

Yes, she did that, you know, and she was slim.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know, because I guess they wasn't looking for big booties back then because my mother was a very slim

[Uncle Steve]

lady, same size as Neville and she had Indian trips. She was part. We part of the Dream Team. They. No, they called us Dream Team. We started, we cranked the party up. There wasn't a party if we weren't there. You know, I love that. And the DJs loved us. They asked us to follow us. You know, we may get a few burgers afterwards. So we didn't get paid, but we got a burger and we got into the club free and we brought our own cocktails.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, you tell me a little bit about. So what happened after you with the barcade? What happened?

[Uncle Steve]

I came home next morning and I was going to the grocery store for me and my daughter's mom. We were together at that time. And my cousin, this is your grandmother had told me that because you find out our person is your cousin, you don't always have to hang with them. Well, as your mother will tell you, sometimes I was not obedient when it came to Mama. You know, I defy things sometime I push the button. And anyway, in that aspect, that morning I went over there and I caught myself trying to sell a little weed too. I went over there and they were talking about going to Memphis. You know, that was to get out, go to Memphis because we so close.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So Memphis is about an hour and a half from car. Memphis is the nearest big town because Corinth isn't really near Jackson or Biloxi. It's about four, four and a half, five hours from. From Jackson and probably another like six hours from Biloxi. Probably.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Mississippi is a really big state. Actually is huge. But it's only an hour and a half if to go up to. To Memphis, Tennessee, if You want to like, have some fun?

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah. So we popped. And when I, like I said, I went over that morning and I was talking to my cousin, we were lining it up. Her husband suffered with post traumatic stress syndrome from the Vietnam war. And you really know. He know. Knew me, but he knew of me. But he assumed because she was much of a. More of a whore. She was doing everybody. You say a mom. Your mama said she was doing everybody. He was getting 100% disability, so. And she was kind of like a cake mama, you know, she. They call her mom and she caked a lot of me off his money, you know, his benefits.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is that like when you're like a sugar baby?

[Uncle Steve]

Uh huh.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You call them cake mama.

[Monet X Change]

I love that the siblings, like, I love that you and Ms. Caldwell were just so tight. Are y' all the closest in age, Mom?

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah. I'm two years older than ma.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How does Aunt Hazel work?

[Uncle Steve]

Hazel's four years older than me. She's six years older than you. Right, Ma?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So Uncle Steve is the patriarch of our family. He's the oldest guy in our family. And Aunt Hazel is the matriarch. She's the oldest. And my mother is second in command for matriarchy, I guess.

[Monet X Change]

So Aunt Hazel's the oldest, then Uncle Steve, then your mom.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Monet X Change]

So that's why Uncle Steve and your mom hung out a lot. They were just very close in age.

[Uncle Steve]

We were close in age, but we, I don't know, we did a lot together. You know, we got to start to able. We were able to go out at the same time. For us, going out to the clubs after we reached a certain age. You had to be a certain age to go out. My mom thought to dance, you know, and then we, me and Martha and be at home, we would be so trained it down, you hear me? And we had this big, huge Mama got us for Christmas with the light, the psychedelic lights on there. And we would get out there and we would work it and get our 45s and get ready for this, for the show, and then we.

[Monet X Change]

45, that's a record player. 45 is a smaller one.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, the small ones. 78.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

See, I know.

[Uncle Steve]

And then Martha, me and Martha, also Martha, Hazel, Lisa and Deborah, they danced, they sung. They were a talent too. They were a group and they had a group.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They used to sing that.

[Monet X Change]

You said people in your family don't sing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know. My mom can't sing.

[Uncle Steve]

Hazen did. But they also danced mine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hazel can sing. I don't think my mom Sings. Can you sing? No, my mom says she can't sing. I remember being a kid, my mom used to. Used to curl her hair. My mom has very short hair her whole life, so she used to have to curl her hair every single day. And she would sit on. I would sit at the edge of the tub and she would sing Aretha Franklin's Deeper Love. But she can't sing that well. So she'd be like, I get up out of bed, I put on my clothes. She was basically like. She would say it because I got.

[Monet X Change]

I got.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I got bills to pay. You hear that, Chris? I got bills to pay. It ain't easy. It ain't easy. That's why I have a tattoo on my chest.

[Monet X Change]

Is that why I got a tattoo? That's so cute.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, it's one of my most favorite songs. But she don't like it anymore now. Now she likes. Wap, is her new favorite song I'm playing. So.

[Monet X Change]

You should get that tattooed on your

[Bob the Drag Queen]

back in the middle of your bed. We keep breaking up stories, but anyway,

[Uncle Steve]

the bottom line with this story is that I went there and he came down. I heard a noise upstairs, but he came down.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who was he?

[Uncle Steve]

Roger, her husband came downstairs and he came down with a 12 gauge shotgun. And I tried to talk him out of the weapon because I know he had been in the service and I had too. So I tried to talk him out of the weapon, but I was sitting down, so I stood up behind the table. She worked her way over from the stove to me, and now he's looking at us. It was a room to the side. You could go from the kitchen to the bedroom. There's one in front where you can go straight. She went to the side, and when I attempted to try to go, but she got. I got away. When I attempted to go, he hit me at close range in my upper thigh, right below my buttocks and. And he blew out my arteries. So I had to have a whole re. Everything. Nerves, everything done in my leg. You know, they say I would never walk, but I'm. I'm. Yeah, I know. I'm walking and popping. You know, Glory to God. You know, even. How old were you? I was actually. It was two months before my 21st birthday. So.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You.

[Monet X Change]

You. Oh, my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When you were 20?

[Uncle Steve]

I lost my leg four years later. I got shot two months before my 21st birthday. I lost my leg in 1984.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So it was. So. It was like. It was like a long recovery.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, I was. I suffered with poor circulation and There was a new surgery, okay, that didn't work. And then I ended up getting gangrene. And then not to top it off, I wasn't doing everything I was supposed to do either. At that time. I was doing a lot of drugs, doing cocaine and I was shooting it and I was doing some of these other things they call T's and B's, tennis shoes and blue jeans and things like that. And they were tennis shoes and blue jeans.

[Monet X Change]

What's that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, we'll talk about after the break. What's that after the break. I started Ornata in 2013 and we make bike apparel. The best part of Shopify for me is our ability to run the business as essentially non technical people. We're able to admin everything on the back end, front end, and sell things online easily. If Shopify were a bike accessory, I think it would actually, actually be the bicycle. It's the thing that you do the thing on. We run the business on Shopify.

[Uncle Steve]

Start your free trial on shopify.com Instacart

[Narrator/Advertiser]

makes grocery shopping easier. And just because you're not doing the shopping yourself doesn't mean you don't care how it's done. With Instacart shopper notes, you can get particular about what you want right in the app. Like rotisserie chicken that's extra crispy steak with marbling the Romans would have loved. And lettuce you'd actually pick yourself. Just leave a note for your shopper so they can get it right for you without having to ask. That way you can get groceries just how you like. Download the Instacart app and shop today.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, we're back. We about to learn about T's and B's. Okay, Tennis shoes. Is this a drug?

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, tennis shoes and blue jeans. Parabenzamine and taun. Taun is a painkiller. The parabenzamine was a, was a, actually something for like breathing like your sinuses. And so it was the upper and one with the downer and you mix them together, you speedball and it was a rugged, the chemistry. But then I went through that, you know, you know, I, I, but I know today I can say that really came out. But it took me low, I was in my low lows and everything. But I was still trying to be the person that everybody, everybody thought I was. And I, and in my spirit I had to tell them that, you know, I'm still alive, you know, because I was trying to still go to the club, hit the floor. I wouldn't wear the Braids. After I got the brace, I wouldn't wear the brace. I would put on heels when I know I'm supposed to have on flats. And I didn't like. And I like wing tips. They had me wearing wing tips.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, the shoes.

[Uncle Steve]

Those old man shoes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, that's the ring with, like, the. Yeah. Almost heard the full ring. I almost heard the full ring.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

But.

[Uncle Steve]

Yes, but, you know, but today I can say that I. I'm living today, you know, and. And Monet is beautiful, you know, it's beautiful to say when you've been through some changes. I took your. Took yourself. I ain't gonna say I've been through. I took a lot of it. I took myself. I brought on to myself. But my family sessions with my sister and things. One thing I can say that if I give anybody credit in my family, sat up my sister, when we came back together, you know, she helped me to begin to take ownership, which sister Martha, my mother, worked with me on taking ownership. I was real bitter and angry when I. Because I feel like I lost everything. The restaurant, you know, my wife died, everything, you know, And I. I came here, I didn't know I was bitter. I thought I was all right. But every time they came downstairs, they would, like, look downstairs first and see what. What position I was in or where I was at, you know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She said, you know, is that at the old house?

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, not the old house, actually. We were doing it to townhouses. When you want.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, oh, back when. Oh, back when Justin was with. What's her name.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah. And you want. You, Paul. Drag race. And Ms. Caldwell brought me out, you know, she brought me. I can say it was hard, but it was like pulling teeth, I guess you would say she was my dentist, you know, because it was back and forth, you know, And I would say things like, you know, boy, I feel like living with Mama all over again. I gotta go.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, my mom really is kind of like the glue that holds. She's kind of like. I guess she would be if anyone said a big mama, except she's tiny. My mom's like.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Like.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She's just like the tiny, tiny little, big mama. Because when I was growing up, my grandma was like, definitely big mama. My grandma was a big mama, though. My grandma was, like, about six foot tall, and she was a big lady, and she had that. That energy, too, that she used to cook a lot. I mean, my grandma was like, like. Like the. Like the. Like, she was like, really a. Like a great depiction of what it means to be, like, a Southern grandma between the cook. I mean, it's really weird too when I think back, she actually wasn't that old. My grandmother passed away at 54 and so my mom is older than my grandmother ever was. But in my head she was like this because she was my grandma. And then I was thinking about my uncle Scotty. Recently, when my grandmother passed away, my uncle Scottie and my uncle John John came to live with us in Georgia. Then we moved to Alabama. And it occurred to me that Scottie was like 19. But I thought that in my head I was seeing Scotty as like this old grown man. Scotty was going to Columbus tech, he was 19. My uncle Jon Jon was like 16 or 15, I think Jon Jon was 15 years old. But in my head there were these old. I am. They were, yeah. Who in Columbus Tech? Georgia Tech. Oh, he had already graduated.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, he hit her wages. Anyway, they were young when I'm getting there, they were very young and. And I am, I am now much older than they were when they came.

[Uncle Steve]

I'm.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm almost where. I'm 37. 30. 37. So I guess it's kind of wild of me to think because when I, when I went to go live with Scotty in La Grange, I think he was 28, 27 or 28 years old. And I was like, me and Justin were. So it was me, Justin, Jr, Scotty and his, his wife at the time, Crystal, all living in a one bedroom apartment in LaGrange, Georgia. So me, Justin and Junior was split the living room. We all lived in the living room. And then, well, I think Junior might have been young enough to sleep in the bedroom. So maybe me and Justin were sleeping on the couch in the love sofa for a whole school year or half a school year in the living room. And then Scotty and Crystal slept in the bedroom. And Junior was like a baby. Like he's like 28 now. And then, you know, there was a period of time where, where we moved from lagrange and me, my mom and my brother were all living. It was me, my mother, my brother, our dog and three birds.

[Monet X Change]

Grizzly.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Grizzly and three birds. All living in one bedroom. We had three birds. Yes, all living in one bedroom. And when I say, I don't mean a one bedroom house. It was a two bedroom home. And me, my mother, my brother, the dog and the three birds were all in one bedroom in this apartment for about a summer in Cobblestone Flats. And then my mom got the three bedroom apartment in the same. In the same Apartment complex.

[Monet X Change]

Was it a cocker? Two or three.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was a parakeet or three.

[Monet X Change]

Lagrange, Georgia. Is that a small. How big is that town,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Charlotte? Yeah, yeah. Cause we didn't have a place to stay, so we stayed in her spare room. We were staying in her spare room so we wouldn't be out in these streets while my mom was trying to get a place to stay. Wait, what'd you ask? Money?

[Monet X Change]

Is lagrange, Georgia a small town?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Lagrange is a big town. Lagrange is. Lagrange is like population of what? I mean, Lagrange, I'm going to guess. I think Lagrange probably has a population of probably between 80 and 100,000 people. Probably just. That's Jacob's Googling right now. I mean, it. It's not near as big as Atlanta. And, and it's.

[Monet X Change]

And it's because you know that Jason.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

31,000 people in Lagrange. 21,031.

[Monet X Change]

That is a small town. Jason Aldean, that dude that just put out that racist ass song, he's talking about that he's from a small town. My uncle's here, that racist song. And he in his small town talking about don't come here after dark, whatever. And his small town is 250,000 people. And they call that a small town.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What's his small town? Memphis. You ever heard of it? Tallahassee girl. Okay, pop off, Mary.

[Monet X Change]

Jason Aldean town.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They are. They are dissecting Jason Aldean's music video to the. There. Now. If you come sideways, the Internet will sleuth. Let me right now, they will sleuth. If you upset people on the Internet, they will find everything about you, everything that's wrong. It's like when Aries Spears. Aries Spears came out and says and, and talked about. Talk bad about Lizzo, baby, when I tell you they found every wrong thing he had ever done and ruined this man systematically and drag everyone else around him, everyone in proximity to him. And they were like, you should have never opened your mouth about Lizzo. You should have sat there. You should. So I shut my fat ass up, you see? You should have sat there like, like, like Monique did in Precious.

[Monet X Change]

That, that's, I hope me. You don't do nothing to drag me down with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So.

[Monet X Change]

So make sure you stay on the straight narrow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, I've been dragged down because of you and your cake.

[Uncle Steve]

I can drag you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You and your birthday cake. You remember that? Yeah.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Be careful.

[Uncle Steve]

Careful.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We wish. Happy birthday, Mary.

[Monet X Change]

I can Talk it to you. Okay, so I have a plan. So I think that we're for Uncle Scotty's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's Uncle Steve.

[Monet X Change]

Sorry, Uncle Steve's 60th birthday.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, we're a little late.

[Monet X Change]

Oh,

[Uncle Steve]

I turned 63 on the first of July.

[Monet X Change]

Oh my God. You and RuPaul the same age, Uncle Steve?

[Uncle Steve]

Yes, I ran with RuPaul. I was at clubs here in Atlanta with RuPaul.

[Monet X Change]

Really?

[Uncle Steve]

Uh huh. She skateroo to every clue. She carried her stuff around. I mean, her backpack, she posted her. I mean, she pushed her agenda. When she was here in Atlanta, she would skate around and all through Midtown, all over, pushing up her. Her flyers for where? Her shows. If she was going to do a no record. A record or whatever she was going to do, she. She skated. I mean.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So Michael, Steve was the first person in my family from, if I'm correct, from the family to move to Georgia. And then my mother and my aunt moved. So he moved to Atlanta, and then my mother, my aunt moved to col a few years after that. Is that correct?

[Uncle Steve]

No. Let me make it right. Y' all.

[Monet X Change]

Spreading misinformation.

[Uncle Steve]

Thank you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Thank you for gathering us hell up and let this man talk.

[Uncle Steve]

Cause Chris already, honey, I mean, I was a hot mess. I moved to down there, from Mississippi to Columbus, Georgia, and I was doing a little everything. And so Chris came through me and Chris always sit in the middle on the armrest in the car. And they came and picked me up at the bus station. And Chris said, uncle Steve, you know, you've been here before. I hope you don't do some of the crazy things you did last time you was here. You know, like when you took mama's car and it was gone and we can't get to school.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How old was I?

[Uncle Steve]

Baby, you may have been five or six, but he would monier. He was already dragging people then, baby, you hear me?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I believe it.

[Monet X Change]

I believe it.

[Uncle Steve]

He taught me though. He really taught me a lot at that time because Chris kept us on our toes, everybody. I don't care who you were, Chris kept you on your toes. He didn't play the radio at 6 or 7, you hear me?

[Monet X Change]

So I want to rewind a little bit. So are you confirming that you are the reason that Bob got on Drag Race?

[Uncle Steve]

Oh, me?

[Monet X Change]

Yes, you are the reason. Is it because of your proximity to RuPaul? Bob got on Drag Race?

[Uncle Steve]

Oh, no, I would never put that out there, no. On his own marriage. On his own marriage.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Thank you, Uncle Steve.

[Uncle Steve]

Truly. On his own marriage.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now, the question is, did Monet get on Drag Race on her own merit? That's the real question. That's the real question, honey. So when did you realize that Kabbal was gay?

[Uncle Steve]

When. When I made. I think maybe at one time I thought it. Ramonsa would always clean it up. But Chris had this thing about all. I mean, from wrestlers to these figurines. Chris had the Hercules, the Stretch Man. Then he went to the MC Hammers, and then we was at Walmart, and he said, mom, want these? And Ma said, no. Chris went. He picked out all his Barbies. I know Chris got his Barbies. MC Hammer came out. Now he gonna grab MC Hammer. He's got MC Hammer in the room, marrying one of Barbies, Barbie dolls. Then he would have them dancing and stuff. And then I noticed that when Chris was a little chubby, so when he couldn't do anything, Chris would. Would cut up. Chris literally would beat up Justin. And all the other kids in the neighborhood, you know, they could. They could flip off the swimming pool thing, and Chris couldn't. So one day, they. They really pissed off Chris and. And we said, what's wrong? Chris was out there. He was yelling and yelling. He said, chris out here fighting us. And I said, what's wrong? Chris said. They said, because Chris turned around, I can fight. I can fight. You know, and he knew how to fight. He. Right. He knew how to fight, but he just couldn't flip at that time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, what. I remember this very vividly. So we used to live in this place called, like, Victory. Victory on Victory Drive was called Magnolia Gardens, I think. And there was this pool house. So there's a pool, and right off the pool, there was this. Right off the pool, there was this little house, this little, like, building that had, like, the cleaning supplies in it. So they used to get on top of this little pool house and flip off. They used to always do this because the way the old.

[Monet X Change]

Were you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was probably 6, 6, 7. But the way the pool house worked was it was like it was built on a hill. So if you walked up the hill, you could just walk on top of the pool house. You'd have to climb on top. You could just walk on the pool house, and then you would jump off because it was built on the hill and the hill was built into the pool, if that makes any sense. Yeah, so we play this game called. We call it cussing, wrestling. And the way that it worked was we would wrestle and curse. It's not that complicated. We would make sure no adults around we would curse and we'd be like. We'd be like, yeah, motherfuckers. And then you would flip off the building or you would just say a curse word. And then you would wrestle or jump. And then Justin is. Justin was very athletic. Justin's always been very athletic. Much more athletic than me. Justin. Well, in terms of speed and agility. So Justin and this other kid named Antonio who ended up robbing me later in life in college, by the way. Shout out to Antonio who robbed me in my first Antonio what document? I can't remember his last name.

[Uncle Steve]

Victory Drive.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I can't remember his last name. But. But he. But he. He robbed me and. Me and Justin when we lived on Lake Bottom. But they would do a backflip off the thing. They would. And they would, like, do this stuff. And then they kept making fun of me because I couldn't do it. I would try to do. I just. Could. I. My body would not do a backflip. They kept making fun of me for not doing it. So then I got mad, and then I started fighting.

[Monet X Change]

So I just started, like, physically fighting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, no. Yeah, I was physically. I was punching. I was throwing bows and slamming people because they kept making fun of me. And they knew that they could. They knew they could get close to me and, like, hit me and then run away. So they get really close to where I could get, like, almost grab them, but they would, like, slap me in the head or push me or kick me, but I could never grab them. But if I got my hands. If I got my chubby little hands on them, it was over.

[Uncle Steve]

It was over. It was over. And he had beat the. To a Ki.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And Ki.

[Uncle Steve]

Kaski and Justin, he. He had terrorized him that day. I mean, literally by the time Ma came out the door, they were telling. And then Chris started screaming, all I can do is fight. I can fight. And he did it. He. He whooped they tail that day. He.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Kaski, if you're listening, shout out to Kowaski. Kowaski was me and Justin's best friend back in the day. Shout out to Kowaski.

[Uncle Steve]

He always came home on Saturday to get donuts. He knew Chris didn't want to have donuts. Fresh donuts.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I love donuts. And Kowalski, that kid could flip. Kowalski was very athletic. Kowalski was so funny. I miss Kowalski.

[Uncle Steve]

I was never a flipping kid.

[Monet X Change]

I was never a flipping kid. I was too scary. I was like. I was too conscious of, like, maybe breaking my arm or snapping my neck. Like, I had this theory if I would Flip. I would land on my neck and I would instantly die. Which that is not true. If you land on your neck, you don't die instantly like you spraying something. You don't die.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and Justin would jump off of anything. I don't know why. We thought we were invincible. Me and Justin would jump. There's a dresser that's still in this house to this day. I will try to get a picture of it. Me and Justin would get. Climb up on this dresser as children and just leap off of it on. Onto pillows on the ground. One time, Justin leaped off of it. When he leaked off, the whole dresser started rocking, and then the dresser landed on Justin. So Justin is now crushed by the dresser. But we were so afraid of getting in trouble that we didn't. We didn't say anything. So. So I'm. I'm like pushing like I am like a child. I am pushing this dresser that's probably like 5 foot 10, the dresser. Trying to push the dresser off of Justin. The drawers are falling out, but. But you know those drawers that they come out, but they'll get stuck, so they can't actually always come all the way out. So I'm like pushing the dresser off of Justin.

[Monet X Change]

And then you think you're a child. How old are you? We need context.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This was in Phoenix City. So I was. I was probably in third grade. So I was probably nine. Just was probably 11. Or this might have been at Victory Drive. So. Which was before third grade. Honestly, this. There's this one dress that's just been in my. In my family for as long as I can remember. This dresser is old. I was just here the other day. And there's a hamper. I'm not kidding you. This hamper has to be 25 years old. This hamper cannot be any. Any less. I used to use this hamper in middle school. And this hamper is. Yeah, yeah. It's a white one that goes in the corner. It's shaped like. Like a quarter of a tri of a circle. And you put it in the corner.

[Monet X Change]

Right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And. And that hamper, it. It is looking worse for the wear, I'll say that.

[Monet X Change]

But it's last though that was made tough.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It. You know, it. It is still. The hamper is still around for. For better or for worse. The hamper is still. Still around for sure.

[Monet X Change]

When did you learn how to do laundry?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, we got a laundry machine in Phoenix City when we moved. So when we lived. So we lived in apartments up until Phoenix City, and then we had a house and Then we had a washer and dryer. And that's when I was in, like third or fourth grade. And I also felt like. I felt like I was too young to be cutting the grass, but I was cutting the grass. So I remember cutting more in the yard but having to reach up. Maybe I'm making that up. I. I remember it. It was. I remember mowing the yard, but like, the. I was in third. I don't know I was in third or fourth grade. We moved to Phoenix City in third grade and I was cutting the. That's when we moved to Phoenix City in third grade. I was in third grade. She said I wouldn't cut the grass. But I. I feel like. Because I remember being like, mom, I wanna. I wanna. I want a riding lawnmower. My mom was like, boy, you were not about to get a. First of all, we had a very small yard. It was not enough to have a. It was tea, it was teeny. You would have rode it for two minutes and you would have covered. We had a tiny little garden on each side of the house, on each side of the driveway. A teen little garden that my mom used to plant flowers in. And then we had. Me and Justin used to cut the grass and we got. That's when we got Grizzly at Walmart.

[Monet X Change]

You got Grizzly at Walmart?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Walmart wasn't selling on Grizzly, but there was this pound that would sell this pound that would sell dogs in the. Walmart. Not in the parking lot. There's Walmart, the parking lot, and there's a bunch of grass. And they would just set up in the grass. So we were like, let's go look at the. I'll try to put a picture of Grizzly Jake. We gotta remember all the things I gotta get pictures of. And we. I was like, oh. So we just saw this dog. He was. He was the smallest dog in the. In the bunch. And we got him for $10. And then we had him for. From third grade until my third year of college. So we had Grizzly for about 11 years.

[Monet X Change]

See, dogs live too long. They live too long.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How old do you think Colleen's gonna be when she goes on to glory?

[Monet X Change]

Colleen's gonna live a problem. No, Colleen has a heart problem. Colleen's life expectancy is maybe eight, maybe nine years.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not too excited about it. That's twisted, Monarch.

[Monet X Change]

I'm not excited about it. It just is what it is. This is what it is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you want her to live longer?

[Monet X Change]

That happens a lot with sphinxes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They have bad hearts Maybe because they're bred poorly. It might be a breeding issue, like pugs. I've been bred poorly, too. Oh, my God. Jesus. Uncle Steve.

[Monet X Change]

I'm so sorry.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Uncle Steve, I'm so sorry about Monet's behavior. This is, y'.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

All.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is, this is. This is not the kind of content we normally do on this podcast. On this podcast. Okay, first of all, we do a little problem.

[Monet X Change]

Listen, your mom listens to a lot of your content. Your mom knows what's going on with you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

On this podcast, we usually do a little bit of Bible study. Sometimes we go over a world history.

[Monet X Change]

I tried to get Bob to do Bible study and to read scriptures and stuff, but it has not been received yet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If you believe that, I got some land in Florida I desperately want to sell you. If you think Monet is trying to drag me to Bible study, I used to go, do you always go to Bible study? Over.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Uncle Steve]

Chris used to go. I. We look for Chris on Sunday morning. Chris. We don't got up and got dressed on it. And when I caught the bus, church. Chris was all around the house going to church.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Seventh grade or it was in middle school. I was, I was, I was, I was going. I was, I. I just decided to be evangelical and I was. I was up in these church trees, baby.

[Uncle Steve]

He was doing his thing, baby. And he come home and then tell us all about it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I almost went to Pensacola Christian College. I was this close to going to Pensacola Christian College.

[Monet X Change]

Pensacola is in Florida.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. Yeah, they came to my church and they were like trying to recruit.

[Monet X Change]

I was watching this whole thing on YouTube, this like two hour long video about. How about white evangelicals are weaponizing Uganda against black people and for. To make them homophobic and transphobic.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Uganda specifically.

[Monet X Change]

Well, a lot of African, but primarily Uganda. Like anytime you see these things about, oh, our church does missions to help kids in Africa, a lot of it is about Uganda because they want these. They're trying to radicalize black evangelicals against trans people, against homosexuals.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So I want to mention Uncle Steve this question because, Uncle Steve, because this is something I say always happens, and Uncle Steve got to see it happen yesterday. Whenever I'm out somewhere and people who are from the continent of Africa, like raised in the continent Africa, see me, they always think I'm African. Did you see. You saw it yesterday?

[Uncle Steve]

Yes, we definitely did. We were there at Radiology and Ms. Marie came out and the first thing she asked Chris was, where are you from? You know what? She's. She's from Uganda.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is she thought I was from you. Oh, no, I. I remember, but she thought I was from Ghana.

[Uncle Steve]

And you know her.

[Monet X Change]

Like, she's a family friend.

[Uncle Steve]

No, she's just a lady that was doing treatment, you know. Oh, God, I got it. And I got to meet her and ignore. You know, and we talk, and she only speaks French. She. Her English is not that great. But she was telling Chris immediately. I know. I thought you were from. From. From Africa.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do people think you're African when I see you?

[Uncle Steve]

I used to. I played on it in my gay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, so can I tell a story? Can I tell. I've never mentioned the story. So what time? We caved one time when we first moved to Atlanta. My mother was out somewhere and someone ran to us and they said. They were like, hey. My mom was like, hey, my name's Martha. I'm Steve's sister. And then the lady said, it's just so crazy cause you don't have an accent. And my mom said, well, I mean, I guess I kind of have a little bit of a Mississippi accent. And then the lady was like, it's just that Steve has, like. She said, Steve has this Jamaican accent. Stephane. Stephan. It's just that you don't sound like. No, she said, you don't sound like you're Jamaican at all. And my mom was like, I'm not Jamaican. My mom said, I'm not Jamaican. I'm from Mississippi.

[Uncle Steve]

Busted my bubble. Hear me? I was. I was.

[Monet X Change]

Wait, so you were telling them? You were. You were telling me that you were Jamaican?

[Uncle Steve]

Yes. I can't imitate him now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So the lady said to my mom, she goes, interesting. You don't sound Jamaican. It at all goes, I'm from. I'm from Mississippi. And then she said, well, Stephan, because

[Uncle Steve]

everybody has another board to step on. I. I took Stefan from Urkel From. Yeah, I went through my own machine, you know, So I came out Jamaican.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So when Uncle Steve moved to Atlanta, he was. He was. He was a Jamaican named Stepha.

[Monet X Change]

Can we hear your Jamaican accent a little bit?

[Uncle Steve]

I wish I could get it. I can't at this point. I can't remember.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But. So, so, so we. So Uncle Steve was also Stephon for a while. Is your name's over the V or Ph?

[Uncle Steve]

No, it's T, F, F, O, N. Oh, got it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So. So, you know, but I also. I mean, I think going by another name is. Is legit. I go by Bob. I have friends that call me Bob. So going by Stefan is not that. When I was a kid, I was like, what is happening? But honestly, it was kind of. I was kind of living. So when I Uncle Steve used to live in Atlanta, right in the heart. I mean, in the. Right where Freaknik used to be, which they don't even. I think there's a documentary about Freak Nick. I mean, he.

[Monet X Change]

Like, you could buy a Jermaine Dupree,

[Bob the Drag Queen]

you could sit on Michael Steve's porch and see Freaknik happening. And so who was your. Was it. Was it. Was it Sydney? It was Sydney. Me and Sydney, my mom and. And my uncle's friend Sydney. We used to sit on the porch and we used to play this game that I was obsessed with where you would just sit on the porch and you would. You would point out who was wearing a wig. I don't know why this game used to. I used to. He'd sit and he's like, child, that's a wig. Oh, she knows she got on a wig. Oh, that's a wig, honey. That's a wig. And then I would try to get good again. I'm like, is that a wig? And he's like, that's not a wig. That's not a wig. And I'm like, that was a wig. He's like, you got it. That was a wig. I don't know why we.

[Monet X Change]

It's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and Sydney used to play the game all the time.

[Uncle Steve]

But that came out of two. No, when they. When. What's the name of Did Babs.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, Holly Berry and. And what's her name? Is it

[Uncle Steve]

like they came from Atlanta? You know, that's when I started doing all the updos and things. You know, they started putting weave into the hair. Black girls. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know, the 90s, it was a big time for hair weaves for, Well, I mean, extravagant hair weaves.

[Uncle Steve]

Did you.

[Monet X Change]

Did you go to Freak Nick, Uncle Steve?

[Uncle Steve]

Oh, I was all up in it. I knew all I had to do is sit at the pool. I could sit on my por. Sit on my porch and go up to the corner and just see them just carrying on in their vans and cars and things. And then they'd be having sex up there at the gas stations and everything.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was wow.

[Uncle Steve]

It was wow. And then at that same time, you'll be so caught up because this whole city would be on gridlock. So now they're coming up and down your street, you know. And then we were. And I was like two blocks over from midtown. And this is at night time on day and night. They were wide open.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Doing Freaknik was why I. I mean, it you have to go watch a documentary and they only gonna scratch the surface. So some of my core memories from being uncle se's place in Atlanta, where I will never forget this. So there are a few things. So first of all, there were. There was this person who would come by and I think he was stealing things and then he would sell them to you for cheap. And so we would get bikes. We bought a sound system one time because this guy would like. I mean, all I knew is that he was like, like a bike. How you get a bike for $10? Like, how did you get a nice bike for $10? But then also Uncle Steve used to had a water bed.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then.

[Uncle Steve]

Oh my God, water bed.

[Monet X Change]

So nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He used to do this really nice recipe where he would like bake apples. It'd be like you, you peel the apple and then you put cinnamon and sugar on it. And then you bake it and it's like a nice salt and you take the core out. It was a really, really delicious. So I remember sitting in Uncle. Well, everyone else in the living room. I was sitting Uncle Steve's room on the waterbed eating baked apples, watching Too Wong Fu over and over. I mean, I would have watched this, this VHS so many times. I was just obsessed with the movie Too Wong Fu. Uncle Steve had it on VHS and I was. I just remember sitting on that waterbed eating baked apples, watching Tuong Fu as a kid.

[Monet X Change]

Wait, Jacob asked Uncle z when he's 25, you were gay. So you. Wait, uncle, you were saying that you

[Bob the Drag Queen]

real quick to clip too. So I remember about the dolls. I used to ask my mom for Barbies and she didn't. She got me the Barbies and she got me Easy Bake Oven. But I used to, I used to play with in my closet. No one told me to, but I remember being like, I probably shouldn't play with these dolls. The Easy Bake Oven. I had the Easy Oven in my car because I think some. I think maybe Kowaski and Antonio made fun of my Easy Bake Oven one time. So then I was like, something in my head was like, oh, this is bad. So I should. I should only put the Easy Oven in the closet because otherwise people are going to make fun of me. So I can't let people see me playing with my Easy Bake Oven, basically.

[Uncle Steve]

But the funny part about it is, is when they did come in to play, they would also try to match up the, the figurines and things, you know, with it with the Barbie dolls themselves. You Mean, so they. Chris actually already turned them on to Barbies too. You mean they just thought that was part of it. You hear me, trendsetter?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What was your question, Mona?

[Monet X Change]

And you said you were telling Martha. Oh, you were telling Miss Martha that you thought Chris. Chris. Oh, my God.

[Uncle Steve]

Whoa.

[Monet X Change]

You were telling Miss Martha that Bob may have been playing for the other team. And what did Ms. Martha say? She's like, no, no.

[Uncle Steve]

She said, child, he's growing. I bet he's experiencing life. It's not like that. When the Martha. I think she always say, no, he experienced. He's finding himself or something.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Whenever people say, I think Chris might be gay. And Uncle Steve was saying you were just like, well, he just experienced online finding out who he is, she said she don't see it. My mom thinks I act straight, which is hilarious to me. My mom thinks, like, even today, my mom thinks that people don't know I'm gay when they see me, which is wild to me. I feel like people on the moon can tell I'm gay for sure.

[Monet X Change]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But she thinks. But she thinks I don't see him gay. But you know what? It is something I wear with as a badge on. I'm always going, that's not a bad thing. But I think people. You know what? Comment below if you all think. If you could tell I'm gay, please comment below. If you think I'm straight, comment below, too.

[Monet X Change]

Stevie Wonder can tell you're gay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Before. Before we let Uncle Steve go, do you have any final questions for him? Monet?

[Monet X Change]

No, I think I asked all the questions I have for Uncle Steve. Well, I didn't devise my plan to get him in drag for your 70th birthday. 65th birthday. We're gonna get Bob to get down there, and I'm gonna come, too. We're gonna put you in full drag. We're gonna order those shoes from Only Maker.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Let's bring Layla in. We should bring Layla in to do us both.

[Monet X Change]

Yeah, let's put Uncle Steven's dryer, like, arch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Like, can it put a heel on it. So me and Uncle Steve had this plan. We haven't done it yet. We had this idea to go to tennis shoe stores and try to see if they'll sell us one shoe. To see if they'll sell us one shoe.

[Monet X Change]

I don't think that's the thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, he has one foot. If he goes in, he's like, I don't need the other shoe. So I'm trying to get a half off. Can you give me One shoe.

[Monet X Change]

That's not going to buy a pair of earrings. Even though you only have one whole Pierce, you still get both.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What if you have one ear, though?

[Uncle Steve]

And we talking about going. And that was even the thing for. We went and got a pedicure, but they gave us half off on a pedicure.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You should get half off on a pedicure. You have one foot. You cannot charge me a full price for a pedicure if I have one foot.

[Monet X Change]

Well, they can and they will.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, you better pedicure.

[Uncle Steve]

No, but I don't think they should charge me. I would tell me type person. I probably were talking to the point

[Bob the Drag Queen]

they said, we got.

[Uncle Steve]

Okay, you get half. You go and get half.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You have. Because you're only doing half the work.

[Monet X Change]

I mean, it makes sense.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That he never had a pedicure. They're gonna realize they're doing twice the work on one foot.

[Monet X Change]

But shoes, you. They can't sell the other shoes they're gonna sell.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know what? You can't. I'm. I'm a real New Yorker. I can bargain anything. Okay? I can bargain anything, honey. All right, listen. We have to go. Money. I love you very much. Do you want to. Do you want to tell my uncle that you love him, or are you just going to ignore him?

[Uncle Steve]

I get to tell you I love you. Because I had told Chris, I said, if you see morning, tell her I love her and I really miss her. I'm very proud of you. I love all that. You do, hear me? And I prayed you go and tear the house down when you go overseas. I mean, Rocky Boo Rocket, because you showed out on RuPaul. You mean, even hosting girl? I mean, he was a great host. You. They're haters. You know what people hate, y'. All. They. They hate on you and Chris. Sometimes undercover, I get so upset. You know, they'd say. They list stuff behind the scenes, but they almost said to you guys, in your face, but I know. I know it rolls off. Some of them said, but, yeah, y' all have. Y' all have hard shells, you know, And I've kind of eased up a little bit. I used to be very aggressive when, you know, I used to read for life. You know, I was a reader. I came in the club. I read. I came. You know, you came in my circle, and you was not that. You know, you didn't. Because I grew up with these sisters here in Atlanta that, you know, used to always talk about labels, and I hate it. You came for conforming. I'm not Gonna conform to y' all labels. I'm. If I'm. I got all the labels. I'm gonna put a few labels together, and we gonna watch it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Here we go. Stitch the labels together, honey. Make an outfit.

[Uncle Steve]

That's it. That's what we did, you know? And they just didn't like. I mean, times didn't really like me. They like the fact that I had a group of people around me that they may be able to sponge off of. But bottom line, I had learned to just stand, you know, and I. To see you guys standing. I mean, standing tall, and especially two black men together doing that, you hear me? And y' all have people that love y', all, you know? You know, you long for a lover in my day, you know, and if you have one, you ain't. They wasn't as. As they are today. They're actually couples who are actually with you, you know, they're not with everybody.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

One of Uncle's partners, I guess the last way I go. I think I told this on the podcast before. Uncle see partners, you said, take me and Justin out. And one day, he said, I'm gonna take y'.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

All.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What was. I remember, I'm gonna take y' all to go see the Brat. And we were so excited. Oh, my God. The Brat was like. She's like. She's from Atlanta. Everyone loves the Bratz. We're like, oh, my God. Uncle C said, come see. We were all the way out in Clayton County. We went into the city Clay Company. We said, oh, going to see the Brat. So he got us in the car, he drove us over there, and then we get to the theater, and then this ballet happens. This ballet happened. And we was like, so I guess the brat's gonna happen after the ballet. So we just sat and watched this entire boring ballet culture. And we were like, so when does the brat happen? And he was like, no, I just said that so you'd come. But aren't you happy that you saw this ballet? We was like, nigga, if you don't show us. We came out here because we wanted to see the Brett, and you got us watching the Nutcracker. This is. We were livid. We were. We were living. He was. He was really. He just wanted to show some culture.

[Uncle Steve]

Yeah, she always said that, you know, and that's another thing, you know, I say again, you know, to have to see you and Chris. Y' all have people, you know, and y' all know how to flow with your partners. You know, I can never get my partner even Want to live in the same house, you know, it's because, you know, they were so busy, you know, doing their old pieces, you know? You know, the strip and all that, you know, and I believed it. I was a sucker for love, you know, But I grew up, you know, and I can love unconditionally today, you know, and love them. I ain't trying to change somebody.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Uncle Scotty sent me a text that said he's getting married, which I knew, but I don't know why he texted me. He was like, I'm getting married. And I just saw uncle. And then I saw s. And then I thought you sent me a text, and I was like, uncle Steve's getting. I was like, he was dating. And then I was like. I was like, I think I just woke up, and I saw this text, and I was like, what is happening? And then I. Then I read it back, and I was like, I thought. I thought she was getting married again for a second.

[Uncle Steve]

But I know I do. I. I say this and I do. I desire at some point, I know, to have a partner or somebody, you know, in my life, but I'm not. I'm not doing anything different this time. Like, you know, I'm not chasing. I'm not trying to be in. I don't want to be in the club scene to get it. If we met at the bus stop, if we met at the grocery store, argue at a movie, you know, be great. But the bottom line is that I just want a companion, somebody to do things with, to laugh with, you know, because I don't even touch myself, you know, I don't even. Honey, I don't.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So if you out there and you single and you are looking for a handsome uncle and father and grandfather, my Uncle Steve is a father and a grandfather as well. So we have a whole family package. My cousin Chalana is really sweet. Her kids are so funn. Yeah. I have this one recording on my phone of your granddaughter making up this crazy. I'll play it for you later. It is so funny. All right, we have to go. Monet, I love you so much.

[Monet X Change]

I love you, too.

[Uncle Steve]

All right.

[Monet X Change]

Bunch of people love you so much.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

All right, bye.