Hello, my friend, and welcome to Cancer Can Give! in this special series of the Simplify Cancer Podcast, we share inspirational stories of people who went on a grueling journey through cancer and yet, they found their own way to live, grow and give in a way that helps others. Today, it is my absolute pleasure to be talking to Heather Hawkins, ovarian cancer survivor, she is a health advocate, the most adventurous spirit I know, a beautiful person doing good out in the world that advocated for health, for hope, and living beyond your comfort zone! In this conversation, we talk about hope, choosing adventurous life after cancer and making a positive difference out in the world.

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Heather, I have a bit of a thing for a first sentence in the book. In your book, the first sentence is: Sometimes our paths in life take us in completely unexpected directions. It’s certainly true, right?

It is.

For yourself as well, and I think when cancer makes an entrance into your life, and for you Heather, a decade ago, your life really took this really unexpected turn, right? Tell us how did all of that play out?

Yes, my goodness, it was 2006, December 2006. I was a busy working mom, I had a 14-year-old daughter and 11-year-old son, and life just is so full of school after school activities, dropping kids off, working hard at the office. I did start to notice this fatigue creeping in and then also a little bit of abdominal bloating, and I was 41 at that stage. I remember thinking, this is probably either menopause creeping in, or I’m overdoing things. Or maybe it’s middle age has spread that I need to get a little bit more fit, a bit more active. Then throughout that Christmas time of December 2006, and then going into 2007, there was some more symptoms that then started to occur.

I was off to the toilet more often than not with frequency with urination. I’d eat small amounts and start to feel really full quickly. My abdominal bloating just continued to grow. It also continued — for every woman at that particular time of month, you do get bloating, tiredness, but when it persisted between periods, that’s when that intuition kicks in. You think, this is not right. This is not normally how my body operates. I thought, I need to go and have a chat with my GP. I’m so glad we have a great relationship with our GP, that I could feel confident to go and talk with him.

I didn’t feel embarrassed. I knew that he would take me seriously just talking about a raft of very general symptoms. Then he would take me seriously and also seek to find answers and have that investigated. That was really the beginning of my fear that this massive shift in my life going from a completely normal world, to suddenly hearing those two words in the same sentence as my name those two words of ovarian cancer.

So many interesting things you said that I want to pick up on, you talked about watching out and listening to your body, things that you knew what not right, and you picked up on those patterns. Then it is about having that courage to speak to your treating doctor, and to bring those things up and to get those things looked into. It’s so vital, isn’t it?

It certainly is and it’s about understanding that this is not how my body normally operates and to sit down with your doctor and to go through all those things that you’re concerned about. I found it really helpful. I wrote out a list so I could go in there. You’re so emotional at that time. If you can refer back to your list, you’re not missing out on things that perhaps are going to be really important with helpful with your diagnosis. Talking that through, he said, “Yes, that does sound serious, I’m going to send you straight off to have a CT scan.”

I was fortunate enough to get into the radiology clinic that afternoon and had that CT scan. I found that really quite confronting that I was taking off my normal clothes, and putting on that white hospital gown, suddenly transforming from this normal life into being vulnerable and raw, and just thinking, wow, I did not expect to be here. Just so anxious, what that scan was going to reveal. A massive shift. Then getting the results that afternoon back in the doctor surgery. Hearing him say those words, then thinking, wow, where does this lead to? What is the prognosis here? How are we going to manage this? With all those questions, as just racing up inside, don’t they?

Absolutely, Heather. I was so also touched by what you brought up as this transition into a different life. You’re exactly right, you put on this gown. It’s like your pathway into a totally different universe where all of a sudden you have to learn this new language and everything that you know changes. To touch on the fact that you said, you went in prepared you made the list of questions because you knew that it’s a crazy time, and you’re likely to get emotional. I think that’s such a great tip as right for whenever you go into the unknown, and whether that’s being of course, around cancer, just health in general is to go in with the list of questions so that you don’t forget in the heat of a moment, which is so easy to do, right?

It is, it’s very easy to do and even also to take someone with you, your loved one or a friend, and that they’re able to ask those questions, perhaps that you forget, or and maybe if you get really emotional and find it very difficult to ask those questions, they can step in and help as well. It is, there’s just so much to sift through, to digest isn’t there. I find perhaps writing notes from that consultation as well. I know with the perhaps my first meeting that I had with my gynecological surgeon that I was referred to after that initial consultation with my GP, you come away and your head is spinning because you’re thinking okay, this now means surgery. How extensive would that surgery be?

Yes. What day are we booked in? Being able to just write down all those things. I love having like a plan in place when, when things are uncertain. You’re not quite sure how they’re going to play out. If you know that you’ve got a plan in place a structure that just helps you cope emotionally so much better, doesn’t it?

Exactly, because you got something to fall back on. It’s so true what you say about not forgetting the little things, because I know, I remember speaking to my urologist. We were talking just about the same, the very same thing about forgetting or just missing a little detail. He told me about a study which I don’t have the details for, but apparently there were studies done around and I believe it’s not to be quoted here, but it was suddenly like that we forget about 80% of what we hear on that first visit to specialists treating you for cancer, because you’re just in that you’re frazzled and you’re in that state of mind. It’s so vital. As you say, take someone with you to take notes so that you have something to fall back on because it’s just such a difficult time, isn’t it?

It really is because you’re you’ve just been taken off in your day-to-day pathway into some new pathway and that it isn’t a very confronting time and I think if you can surround yourself with that support some real clarity. I know our when our imagination gets the better of us t...