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- [00:02]
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- [00:49]
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What if I told you I don't want to teach anymore? What if I told you I just want to share? What if I told you that through my sharing you can learn? That's where I'm at right now. I'm done teaching in the sense of creating a course or trying to force myself in a position that I actually don't want to be in. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful. I'm grateful for where I am. I'm grateful for where I've came from. If you listen to last week, you can hear a little bit of my story on Chase My Dreams, and I shared that to just. It was just a reflection of how far I've come in my own career. And, and really it was inspired by talking to you guys. You guys are always my inspiration. It's amazing. I get on some of these. I'm not calling them a mentorship call. I've been calling them a mastermind. But that still doesn't feel right either. It's just a conversation between two estheticians is really all it is. I just want to be a sounding board for you, and then I want to use this platform to reflect that sounding board back to you. To as many estheticians who are willing and open to hear this just in a time that feels so tumultuous, crazy, wild, overwhelming, sometimes exciting. I don't know. There's a lot of feelings going right now. And the more that I tune out of social media, I tune out of the tv, I tune out of just anything on the Internet and tune into myself more, I'm finding, well, I'm digging through a lot of mud. I'm digging through a lot of mud. Of many, many, many, many years of pain. But with that pain, there's also so much, like love and joy and gratitude for what I've gone through and to be kind of like spit out on the other side. And now I'm here, just like stripped away everything and I kind of feel. I feel naked, but I'm standing proud, or I'm starting to stand proud as I stand here naked in front of you, just slowly trying to, like, do exposure standing naked in front of people. Actually, side note, I accidentally did get in front of people naked the other day, which I think is just like part of my exposure therapy. There's the word I was looking for, exposure therapy. I'm grateful that I live in Southern California where sometimes in winter it's 70 degrees and sunny and beautiful. But we just did have all those fires and now we're having a little bit of rain. But anyhow, the neighbors were, the neighbors were redoing their, their roof because of all the craziness here in la. And it was just one of those days. I was like, I'm gonna go outside and lay in the sun naked and read a book. I'm not one of those estheticians that's afraid of the sun, by the way. I feel like I don't like the fear mongering when it comes to the sun. The sun is literally what keeps us alive every day and helps our food grow. It helps us grow. So a little bit of vitamin D really can go a long way. But anyhow, so I was out there sunning myself naked, sunning all the, especially in the winter, like we need. If you get a little bit of sun, go sun yourself. Like, you will be amazed at how good you feel. It helps boost the immune system. So if you're getting over a cold or you don't want to get a cold, or you're dealing with other, like, immune issues. I was dealing with some stuff, so I was like, I need some sun on all the parts that normally don't see sun. So I'm out there reading my book. I thought the neighbors were done. I also didn't really think about it that hard, but there they were on the roof while I was out there naked. And I'm sure the old me probably would have been, like, mortified, but I was like, you know what, it's fine. They saw me naked. So that was exposure therapy number one. And now I'm on here telling you guys about it. So maybe exposure therapy number two and just, you know, doing my best to show up even more Authentically. While I'm going through these transitions, you guys know I've been going through these transitions. You're probably going through these transitions too. It's in the air of everything, the world again on social media. There's like, I don't know. I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of it. And I know you're sick of it, too, and I'm telling you that you don't have to consume it. You don't have to consume it. If you guys watch this super bowl halftime with Kendrick Lamar, he says, turn the TV off. Turn the TV off. Turn the fucking TV off. Turn your fucking phone off. Turn instagram off. Turn TikTok off. Okay, I'm saying this to myself, too. I did last week, turn off my phone. I just had a moment. I was like, fuck this shit. I'm. I'm like. It was literally making me feel nauseous because I get caught up in it, and it's like, even if I don't want to look at something, it somehow still finds me. And I know you feel the same way. So if the phone is making you feel a certain way, if it's triggering you, turn it off. Delete the app, walk away from it. We need more space away from the phone so we don't all turn into cyborgs. But anyhow, I feel like I was going somewhere with this besides turning the TV off. But that. That's it. I. I don't want to. I'm done educating. Okay. Now, you can take that for whatever way you want to, but I'm here to share. I want to share my story. I want to share my inspiration that I get from your stories, and I'm not sure what that looks like. It's just starting here. I'm definitely being called to activate my voice more, and that's what I'm gonna do. So. I don't know. I don't know yet. I don't know. I wish I had more clarity to share with you guys. There's a lot of stuff on the horizon. I know. I keep saying that. It's so annoying. I don't want to say that anymore. Okay. What do I want to say? My new product is coming soon. It's coming soon. Okay. But we're doing it differently this time. I'm just going to do a different. But I am being called to express with my voice. I'm being called to play music, and I want to bring you along on this journey, if you care to come. Will I still be doing skincare? Yeah, a little bit. But I have other things I want to do, other things I want to share because they've helped transform my physical being, my emotional being, my mental state. This is the most, like, Casey I've ever felt. And I know, like, I'm just on the. Like, I'm just on the horizon of, like, feeling like myself. Like, I feel like I'm going back to Casey at 3, Casey at 5, Casey at 7. Like, before the world tried to fucking demolish me. It didn't. It didn't, it didn't. I'm here. I just. Moving through a lot of, like, old baggage that just, like, is not mine. And, like, yesterday, I was just. I was just fucking mad. I was just mad. And it's just, like, all the anger and rage from so many years of things and not being true to myself. And I just. I just yelled. I just yelled until I couldn't anymore. And I'm grateful that I'm in a home that I created that feels safe and is starting to feel even more safe. And I have a husband who understands and supports that. And he's like, babe, just. Just yell. If you need to fucking yell, just yell. I was like, oh, my God, I'm gonna freak out the neighbors. I already. They already saw me naked, and now I'm gonna be screaming in the house. But you know what? It's fine. It's fine. It's healthy. So I yelled and I yelled and I yelled and I yelled until I couldn't yell anymore. And it's funny because at first when I was yelling, it was, like, angry. It's like, fuck you. You didn't. You know, you're judging me, you're trying to hold me back, all that kind of stuff. And then it turned into, like, a transmission of, like, I've always known who I am. I am powerful, I am beautiful. I. I've always known who I was. And it's time to step back into that power 100%. So with that being said, here we are. I just. I don't know, I felt called to get on the mic and share with you. And if you're still here, you get it. If you're not here, then you're not hearing this. But I love you guys. And there's, like, I said a lot more on the horizon. I'm going to be continuing to use my voice to share. And that's it for now. Make sure you're following me on Instagram if you care to, or just fucking delete the app. I don't, you know, we'll find each other. I have been sending out. I've been trying to send out some more emails that feel like maybe a little bit more personal. I don't know. I'm still, like, digging through the freaking rubble that is the reality of 2025. So let's try and stay connected, and I'll talk to you soon, okay?