
On this episode of ClueLess, host Elliott Kalan and constant contestant Sean Hayes welcome back Sean’s good friend, actor Jeff Max, to attend another recital of Bot Bops! Elliott’s non-branded digital assistant will regale you with five classic songs in its own cold, inhuman style, name the song for one point and the artist for another point! Keep track of your answers in order to solve the MegaClue! New episodes every Monday and Thursday. Puzzles in this episode are by Kevin Leman and Devon Torrey Bryant. Script by Elliott Kalan. Music and sound effects by Devon Torrey Bryant.
Loading summary
Elliot Kalin
Today's episode of Clueless is sponsored by Monopoly. And their three brand new expansions get faster gameplay and fresh twists with free parking. Jackpot. Go to jail and buy everything available now. Monopoly is a trademark of Hasbro Smart.
Devin Tory Bryant
Bless me.
Elliot Kalin
Before we start today's episode, let's turn to the five day forecast. In five days, it will be five days from now. Please dress accordingly. This is Clueless.
Sean Hayes
That's good. Clueless. I'm Clueless.
Elliot Kalin
Wow.
Sean Hayes
How about that?
Elliot Kalin
I love it. That's a new flavor.
Sean Hayes
Really good. Yeah, Maybe that might be the new one. From now on, I'm Clueless. Do you ever say you ever play Candy Crush? Or like, great, terrific.
Elliot Kalin
See, I. Unfortunately, I only know that the video games from when I was a kid, so it's all flawless victory, finish him. That kind of stuff.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, right. That was more like my dad. Go ahead.
Elliot Kalin
Welcome to Smartless Presents. Clueless, the only puzzle podcast that says how are you? And really wants to know. I'm your host, Elliot Kalin, and I've never been abducted by aliens, but they did give me a ride to the airport once. Now, please. Now please welcome the man whose love language is showing off how good he is at puzzles, Sean Hayes.
Sean Hayes
Oh, oh, oh, it's me. Don't change the channel just for it's all I have left. I'm joined today here by my very dear good friend, funny, charming, good looking, wealthy in all areas. Well, four out of five ain't bad. It's Jeff. Max. Hello.
Elliot Kalin
I don't want to get too personal here, but this is probably too much information. What I'm about to tell you. I've always had a fantasy about starting this episode by revealing the answer to last episode's cliffhanger puzzle. And if it's not too weird, I want you guys to help me finally live this out. Is that okay?
Sean Hayes
Very good. Nothing I'd rather do.
Elliot Kalin
All right, so let's do it. Okay. Last episode's cliffhanger was about celebrities, and it went thusly. Chef Alton Brown, author Charles Dickens, and singer Ella Fitzgerald are going on vacation together in Palm Springs. But they have room for one more person in their yurt. Take a look at who's already going and tell me who would be the right person to go with them and why.
Sean Hayes
All right, so, Sean. Yes. I think A, B, C, D, E, F. We need a star.
Bot
Nice.
Sean Hayes
I didn't even see that. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H. You could do. Who's G.H. george Hamilton.
Elliot Kalin
Perfect. Great. We'll do it. George Hamilton. Is exactly right, Jeff. You got it exactly right. There are multiple answers to this cliffhanger. Anyone with the initials GH who is famous could be the correct answer.
Sean Hayes
And 99% of people listening are go, who the hell is George Hamilton?
Elliot Kalin
Well, then it's. It's their loss.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, I couldn't think of another. Is there like a George.
Elliot Kalin
There's George Harrison from the George Harrison.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Elliot Kalin
You could do Goldie Hawn.
Sean Hayes
Oh, Goldie Hawn. Oh, I wish we would have done Goldie Hawn.
Elliot Kalin
You could do the composer George Hirschwin.
Sean Hayes
Oh, sure, sure, sure. Not George Hirschwin.
Elliot Kalin
Just has to be the initials gh.
Sean Hayes
Wow. I can't believe you got that. That's so clever.
Elliot Kalin
That was great, Jeff.
Sean Hayes
Hey, clueless listeners. Sean Hayes here. Do you like to buy everything? Well, I can't help you with that, but Monopoly can. With the new buy everything expansion for Monopoly, you can literally buy anything on the board. That means you can buy jail, you can buy free parking, community chest. Everything on the board is up for grabs. Yep, every single space is for sale. And that means no more waiting for your turn to land on something good. Add the expansion to any classic Monopoly board, roll the buy D, grab more abilities, and unlock ways to win faster. The game ends when all properties are owned, but you. You could end it way sooner if you're playing smart. I've been playing Monopoly my whole life, as you know. That's why I'm on this podcast. I'm a huge gamer. I love all kinds of games, and Monopoly is one of my favorite games of all time. And why not add the buy everything pack? Because, you know, my husband Scotty likes to buy everything, and it's super fun when we play with that add on for Monopoly. So if you want to own everything, get your hands on this expansion. May spinning for big cash or playing dirty with corruption cards is more your speed. However you play, Monopoly has three new expansions for you to explore. And if you're a person who likes to buy everything, you'll probably want all three expansions, which are all available now on Amazon. A classic board is required to play, but you can buy that on Amazon too. Monopoly is a trademark of Hasbro at the Home Depot.
Announcer
Spring Black Friday is here, and we've got 14 days of deals to transform your space. So what are you working on? How about a quick and stylish patio furniture? And what's outdoor dining without a shiny new grill? Find a wide selection of grills under $300 like the next Grill 4 burner for only $229 at the home Depot, then add a little ambiance with string lights. Shop 14 days of deals during spring Black Friday, now through April 16th at the Home Depot.
Advertiser
Are you still quoting 30 year old movies? Have you said cool beans in the past 90 days? Do you think Discover isn't widely accepted? If this sounds like you, you're stuck in the past. Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. And every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the now it pays to Discover. Learn more@discover.com credit card Based on the February 2024 Nelson Report.
Elliot Kalin
Listeners at home, did you get the answer? If so, know thee that I have need of one with skills such as thine. For on the morrow, my compatriots and I embark on our quest to save the elven lands by slay the dark dragon Slitheroth. But we shall speak of that anon. Because it's time for today's main game, botbops.
Sean Hayes
Already.
Elliot Kalin
Botbops.
Bot
I am the bot, and these are my bops.
Sean Hayes
By the way, that's my favorite thing to say. If somebody ever takes a really long time doing anything in life, I just. Or they're like. Or they're super late and like, I'm going to be here in five minutes. I always say already.
Elliot Kalin
In this game, botbops, our digital robot assistant has selected five songs to perform for you in its cold, emotionless, human, yet somehow beautiful voice. Your job is to name the song and its original artist first. Because. That's right, this is a competitive game. It's Sean versus Jeff for all the marbles.
Sean Hayes
Oh, no.
Elliot Kalin
You'll get a point for the song title, a point for the artist. If one person knows the song but not the artist or vice versa, whoever gets the most points wins. Are you ready to play?
Sean Hayes
Oh. Oh. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
Elliot Kalin
Okay, Bot, can you please play your first bop?
Bot
Been working so hard I'm punching my card Eight hours for what? Oh, tell me what I got I've got this feeling yeah, that time's just holding me down I'll hit the ceiling or else I'll tear up this town so now I gotta cut loose Footloose, blank, blank.
Sean Hayes
It's Kenny Loggins. Footloose.
Elliot Kalin
Bot, can you tell us that bop?
Bot
Footloose by Kenny Loggins.
Elliot Kalin
Shawn, that is two points for you.
Sean Hayes
I'm gonna lose so bad to him.
Elliot Kalin
All right, takes the lead with two points. Bot, give us our next bop.
Bot
I've been meaning to Tell you I've got this feelin that won't subside I look at you and I fantasize you're mine and tonight now I've got you in my sights with these blanky blanks One look at you and I can't disguise I've got blanky blanks I feel the magic between you and I that.
Sean Hayes
Would be Hungry Eyes from the movie Dirty Dancing. And I always thought it was Patrick Swayze that sang it, but I don't think it's Patrick Swayze.
Elliot Kalin
No, he sings the she's like the wind. It is not Patrick Swayze. But you're right, it is Hungry Eyes. Jeff, are you gonna steal this one? Do you know who performs the song Hungry Eyes? I have no idea.
Sean Hayes
He's googling it as we speak.
Elliot Kalin
Are you googling it? Okay, Sean, are you gonna steal this one back from Jeff after he failed to steal it from you?
Sean Hayes
Do you know before when I didn't know.
Elliot Kalin
You mean in the last second or two?
Sean Hayes
Have you remembered Hungry Eyes? One look at you in a candy sky like that. I don't know. I don't know who it is.
Elliot Kalin
Bot can you confirm the song and also who sang it?
Bot
Hungry Eyes by Eric Carman.
Elliot Kalin
It is Eric Carman. Eric Carman is the From South Park. That's Eric Cartman.
Sean Hayes
I'm sorry.
Elliot Kalin
Although I feel like that's a novelty hit right there. Is Cartman doing Hungry Eyes?
Bot
These are my bops.
Elliot Kalin
Okay, let's move on to question three. Slow start for Jeff, but I think he's gonna pick up.
Sean Hayes
By the way, that's the story of life.
Elliot Kalin
Go ahead, bop number three. Bot. Bop it.
Bot
I never really knew that she could dance like this. Hey, she make a man want to speak Spanish. Como sayama. See? Benita. Si. Mi casa su casa. Oh, baby, when you talk like that you make a woman go mad. So be wise S And keep on c reading the signs of my body Uno, dos, tres, cuatro. I'm on tonight. You know my blanks. Blank, blank.
Sean Hayes
Clarification. Did you say I'm on tonight?
Elliot Kalin
I'm on tonight? Yes, I'm on tonight.
Sean Hayes
You know my blank, Blank blanks. What?
Elliot Kalin
You know my blanks. Blank, blank.
Sean Hayes
You know my blanks. Blank, blank.
Elliot Kalin
I don't sing it as well as the bot.
Sean Hayes
I mean, it's either Jennifer Lopez or it's Ricky Martin or it's. I don't know. That's Madonna. No, that's La isla bonita. It's the only one she's saying. Yeah, I say we're super young, you guys. If anybody's listening.
Elliot Kalin
That's the problem.
Sean Hayes
I know you can't see us, but.
Elliot Kalin
We'Re super young should really be in school right now. Listeners can't see that there's an on set tutor who is always tapping her watch to make sure we take the breaks we need to for these, these little kids.
Sean Hayes
Elliot, that is hysterical. Oh my God. I'm sorry. That's a school bus. We have to go.
Elliot Kalin
Oh, you gotta go. Sorry, we have to cut this short. Oh, you're late for soccer practice.
Sean Hayes
Wait a minute. Oh, gosh. It's a Spanish. It's a person with Spanish in their blood or Latin or something like that, right?
Elliot Kalin
Yes. This is a Spanish language performer. Yes.
Sean Hayes
I mean, okay, I write with one of those too.
Elliot Kalin
No, it's a huge language. Millions upon millions of people.
Sean Hayes
I want names. I want names right now. I don't believe you.
Elliot Kalin
Do you both. Do you both give up or would you like to take one shot in the dark? Stab at it, Julio Iglesias. But no, but tell them what that bop is.
Bot
Hips Don't Lie by Shakira.
Elliot Kalin
Shakira.
Sean Hayes
No, that was the next thing I was gonn.
Elliot Kalin
Yep, I'm on tonight. You know, my hips don't lie. Oh, of course.
Sean Hayes
I don't even know how that song goes. I mean, I would if I heard it, probably.
Elliot Kalin
I mean, if you heard it, you would know how it goes because the song would just be playing.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Elliot Kalin
This next bop, maybe it's gonna be more up your alley. Who knows? We'll find out. I think it's all in English, so that might help. Oh, okay. Number four, bot play that bop.
Bot
I feel drunk but I'm sober I'm young and I'm underpaid I'm tired but I'm working yeah, I care but I'm restless I'm here but I'm really gone.
Sean Hayes
Oh yeah.
Bot
And I'm sorry, baby. And what it all comes down to is that everything's gonna be quite alright. Cause I've got one blank, blank, blank, blank, blank. And the other one is flicking a cigarette.
Elliot Kalin
I don't think Jeff knows it. So. Sean, do you. Okay. Yeah.
Sean Hayes
Jeff Alanis Morissette. Yes. One hand in my pocket.
Elliot Kalin
But is that the answer?
Bot
Hand in My Pocket by Alanis Morrisette.
Elliot Kalin
I give it to Jeff. He added a word because that word does appear in it.
Sean Hayes
I got one.
Elliot Kalin
Who cares? I got one. You got it. You almost tied it up. This is now a close game. Whereas before it was not particularly Close. But now it's a very close game.
Sean Hayes
Now, you should be truthful. You should go out on top, Jeff.
Elliot Kalin
Okay, bot, play us this final ultimate bop.
Bot
Well, I just heard the news today it seems my life is going to change I closed my eyes, begin to pray Then tears of joy stream down my face Blank, blank, blank, blank under the sunlight welcome to this place I'll show you everything I'll show you everything. Blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank, blank.
Elliot Kalin
Do you know this one? I know. When you heard. I heard the news today, you were like, I know what this song is. It wasn't that song. It was a different song.
Sean Hayes
I know it. I totally know it. I just can't think of it. I just heard. I could hear that phrase, but then I close my eyes and begin to. It's right on the tip of my tongue.
Elliot Kalin
Okay, let's see if the tip of your tongue is right, Bot. What's on the tip of Sean's tongue?
Bot
With arms wide open by Creed.
Sean Hayes
That's it.
Elliot Kalin
With arms wide open by Creed. Well, this was. This was one of the more interesting Bot bops rounds. Going into the end of the game. The score currently stands at Sean, three points. Jeff, two points.
Sean Hayes
Oh, I had two.
Elliot Kalin
But the game, it's not over yet. You have two points. Yeah, you got two points there.
Sean Hayes
You're like. You're like. And the game itself, 20 points.
Elliot Kalin
Yeah. Just like in real life, the machines have won. Yeah, there's no way. But just in case you were worried that machines were stealing the jobs from us flesh and blood game show hosts, don't worry. Only a human has what it takes to ask today's Mega Clue.
Sean Hayes
Mega Clue question.
Elliot Kalin
So for today's Mega Clue, whoever gets this wins the game for today, which one of you can tell me what do all of these songs have in common again? The songs were Footloose, Hungry Eyes, Lips Don't Lie, Hand in My Pocket, and Arms Wide Open.
Sean Hayes
That's correct. Oh, they're all parts of the body.
Elliot Kalin
Yes, exactly right, Jeff. They're all parts of the body.
Sean Hayes
That's really. I was like, wait a minute. They were all made into musicals. Like.
Elliot Kalin
Yeah, well, Sean tends to overthink sometimes because he's used to the intricate puzzles, whereas Jeff tends to underthink.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, Jeff likes the game. Candyland.
Elliot Kalin
Listeners at home, did you do as well as Sean and Jeff? If not, that's okay. I'm sure there's something you do better than they do. It's just not this. But perhaps it'll turn out to be our cliffhanger puzzle.
Sean Hayes
Oh.
Elliot Kalin
The cliffhanger puzzle is like going to a psychic who gives you a glimpse of riddles yet to come. Today's cliffhanger involves our very own constant contestant and star of the show. And it goes thusly. Sean Hayes is escaping from a labyrinth. And there are three exits. Exit A leads to an inferno. Exit B leads to an assassin. Exit C leads to a lion that hasn't eaten in three years. Which exit is best for Sean to pick?
Sean Hayes
D my career.
Elliot Kalin
We'll find out the answer to that cliffhanger puzzle not on the next episode, but the episode after that. Because next episode will be our special Monopoly special episode special. Stay tun to find out what that means. Because with that, we must say farewell. Will we ever see each other again? Well, no. We're not even seeing each other now. This is an audio medium. And before we don't see each other again next time, I'd like to thank Jeff Max for making us feel all warm inside. Thank you, Jeff. Thank you. And I'd like to thank Sean Hayes for making us feel kind of weird inside.
Sean Hayes
You are welcome.
Elliot Kalin
And I'd like to thank you, the listeners, for making us feel thankful to you, the listeners inside. Until next time, this has been Smart List presents Clueless. And I've been your host, Ellie Kaelin, reminding you to set your clocks forward if you don't want to know what time it is.
Devin Tory Bryant
Clueless, you have been listening to Smartless presents Clueless, a Smartless Media production in association with SiriusXM. Your host is Elliot Kaelin, who also writes our scripts. Your constant contestant is Sean Hayes, who does like candy. Your producer, editor and engineer is Devin Tory Bryant, who is me. I also write all the music and sound effects assistant engineer, Kyle McGraw. Today's puzzles were written by Kevin Lehman and myself. Talent producer is Anne Harris. Associate producer Matty McCann. Social media producer, Tommy Galgano. Executive producers are Elliott Kaelin, Sean Hayes, Will Arnett and Jason Bateman. Executive producers for Smartless Media are Richard Corson and Bernie Kaminski. Remember to follow, subscribe, rate and review the show. It really helps. That's all for now. We will see you again for more cl.
Elliot Kalin
Thank you to our partner Monopoly for supporting today's episode. Just like Clueless is a shorter, faster show from Smartless Media, Monopoly is introducing three new expansion packs that you add on to classic Monopoly for fresh twists, faster gameplay and a modern take on the game you love. I'm talking about Monopoly. Look out for the all new, Buy everything, go to jail or free parking. Jackpot expansions to spice up your next game night, Pick your expansion and level up your game. Available now on Amazon. Monopoly is a trademark of Hasbro.
Devin Tory Bryant
Smart Less Meow.
Announcer
At the Home Depot. Spring Black Friday is here, and we've got 14 days of deals to transform your space. So what are you working on? How about a quick and stylish patio furniture update? And what's outdoor dining without a shiny new grill? Find a wide selection of grills under $300 like the next grill four burner for only $229 at the home Depot. Then add a little ambiance with string lights. Shop 14 days of deals during spring Black Friday, now through April 16 at the home Depot.
SmartLess Presents ClueLess: Episode 144 - Bot Bops (w/ Jeff Max) Summary
Release Date: April 14, 2025
Introduction
In Episode 144 of "SmartLess Presents ClueLess," host Elliott Kalan teams up once again with the ever-competitive Sean Hayes and special guest Jeff Max. This episode delves into solving last episode's cliffhanger and introduces the main event: the engaging game of Bot Bops. True to the podcast's format, listeners are taken on a journey filled with puzzles, banter, and playful competition, all encapsulated within a lively 12-minute runtime.
Cliffhanger Puzzle Recap and Solution
Elliott begins by addressing the unresolved cliffhanger from the previous episode:
“Last episode's cliffhanger was about celebrities, and it went thusly. Chef Alton Brown, author Charles Dickens, and singer Ella Fitzgerald are going on vacation together in Palm Springs. But they have room for one more person in their yurt. Take a look at who's already going and tell me who would be the right person to go with them and why.” (02:05)
Sean immediately dives into the puzzle, suggesting potential candidates based on the initials "GH":
“I think A, B, C, D, E, F. We need a star... George Hamilton.” (02:32)
Elliott confirms Sean’s answer, highlighting multiple possible solutions with the initials "GH":
“George Hamilton. Is exactly right... you could do George Harrison, Goldie Hawn, George Gershwin.” (02:41)
Sean humorously laments that most listeners might not recognize George Hamilton, adding a light-hearted touch to the discussion.
Main Game: Bot Bops
Elliott introduces the main game segment, Bot Bops, where a digital bot performs snippets of songs, and Sean competes against Jeff Max to identify them.
“In this game, botbops, our digital robot assistant has selected five songs to perform for you in its cold, emotionless, human, yet somehow beautiful voice. Your job is to name the song and its original artist first.” (06:08)
Round 1: Footloose by Kenny Loggins
The bot begins with lyrics from "Footloose":
“Been working so hard I'm punching my card... Footloose by Kenny Loggins.” (07:03)
Sean quickly identifies both the song and artist, earning him two points.
Round 2: Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen
Next, the bot presents lyrics from "Hungry Eyes":
“I've got this feeling that time's just holding me down... Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen.” (08:20)
Sean attempts to guess, initially mistaking it for Patrick Swayze’s rendition but later corrected by Elliott. Jeff is unable to secure points for this round.
Round 3: Hand in My Pocket by Alanis Morissette
The third bop features lines from "Hand in My Pocket":
“I never really knew that she could dance like this... Hand in My Pocket by Alanis Morissette.” (09:01)
Sean struggles initially, but Jeff successfully identifies the song, narrowing the score gap.
Round 4: Hips Don't Lie by Shakira
The bot continues with "Hips Don't Lie":
“When you talk like that you make a woman go mad... Hips Don't Lie by Shakira.” (10:11)
Sean successfully names both the song and artist, extending his lead.
Round 5: With Arms Wide Open by Creed
The final bop echoes "With Arms Wide Open":
“Well, I just heard the news today it seems my life is going to change... With Arms Wide Open by Creed.” (12:00)
Sean nails the song and artist, cementing his victory with a final score of three to Jeff's two.
Mega Clue: Commonality Among the Songs
Elliott poses the Mega Clue to determine what ties all the identified songs together:
“Which one of you can tell me what do all of these songs have in common?” (14:15)
Sean quickly responds:
“They're all parts of the body.” (14:33)
Elliott confirms the accuracy, attributing the common theme to body parts featured in each song title.
Cliffhanger Puzzle Presentation
To wrap up the episode, Elliott presents a new cliffhanger puzzle:
“Sean Hayes is escaping from a labyrinth. And there are three exits. Exit A leads to an inferno. Exit B leads to an assassin. Exit C leads to a lion that hasn't eaten in three years. Which exit is best for Sean to pick?” (15:17)
Sean humorously quips:
“D my career.” (15:44)
Elliott promises to reveal the answer in the subsequent episode, maintaining listener engagement and anticipation.
Conclusion
Elliott closes the episode with gratitude towards Jeff Max and Sean Hayes, emphasizing the unique dynamics each brings to the show. The playful interactions and competitive spirit leave listeners eagerly awaiting the next installment.
“...I'd like to thank Sean Hayes for making us feel kind of weird inside.” (16:16)
Notable Quotes
Final Thoughts
Episode 144 of "SmartLess Presents ClueLess" masterfully combines humor, competition, and intellectual challenges, making it a captivating listen for both regular fans and newcomers. The interplay between Elliott, Sean, and Jeff, coupled with the innovative Bot Bops game, ensures an entertaining and thought-provoking experience.
Timestamp Reference