SmartLess Presents ClueLess: Episode 167 - “Don’t Be A Ditloid” (w/ Scotty Icenogle)
Release Date: August 4, 2025
Host: Elliott Kalan
Guest: Sean Hayes
Duration: 13:12

Introduction and Welcome (00:00 - 02:04)

Elliott Kalan, the Emmy-winning writer and host of SmartLess Presents: ClueLess, kicks off Episode 167 with his signature humor. He introduces the theme of the episode, emphasizing the fun and challenge awaiting listeners as they navigate through puzzles and brainteasers alongside contestant Sean Hayes.

Notable Quote:
Elliott: “Welcome to Smartless Presents. Clueless, the puzzle podcast that's more fun than going to the dentist, but not as good for your teeth.” (00:31)

Guest Introduction and Banter (02:04 - 06:22)

Sean Hayes joins Elliott Kalan on the show, bringing a lively dynamic to the conversation. The hosts engage in playful banter, discussing Sean’s nickname “Iceman” from his high school days and Elliott’s affectionate nod to their long-standing friendship. This segment sets a friendly and engaging tone for the episode.

Notable Quote:
Sean Hayes: “I always claimed that. Well, in high school, everybody called me Iceman...” (02:04)
Elliott: “It’s true. You do. You have a warmth in your heart, even though ice is in your name.” (01:49)

Opening Puzzle: “Samesies” Challenge (02:38 - 03:40)

Elliott presents the episode’s opening puzzle, a “samesies” game where contestants identify the commonality among seemingly unrelated items. The puzzle for this episode asks: “What makes the following three things samesies? A snake, a delicatessen, and a piano lesson.”

Sean quickly identifies the answer—scales—explaining that snakes have scales, delicatessens use scales for weighing, and piano lessons involve musical scales.

Notable Quote:
Sean Hayes: “Snakes got scales. They all have scales.” (02:38)
Elliott: “They all have scales. Snakes have scales. Delicatessens have scales to weigh them, eat. And piano lessons have scales.” (03:28)

Main Game: “Don’t Be A Ditloid” (03:41 - 08:35)

The primary segment of the episode, “Don’t Be A Ditloid,” challenges Sean and Scotty to decipher abbreviated titles of popular movies using numbers and letters. Elliott explains the rules with an example: “O11” stands for Ocean’s 11.

Game Highlights:

1. 101D – 101 Dalmatians
   Sean identifies the family-friendly movie correctly on the first attempt. (05:18)

2. 500 DOS – 500 Days of Summer
   Scotty quickly deciphers this title, showcasing their chemistry and teamwork. (05:28)

3. 12:00am 12 – 12 Angry Men/Monkeys
   After some confusion, they settle on 12 Angry Men. (05:38 - 06:00)

4. 40 yov – Incorrect guess leads to clarification. Discussing How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days as the correct answer. (06:22 - 08:13)

5. 21 js – 21 Jump Street
   Sean nails this one effortlessly. (06:29)

6. ls and two sb – Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
   Scotty appreciates the London flair of the title. (06:37)

7. 10T I H A Y – 10 Things I Hate About You
   Despite initial confusion, they correctly identify the romantic comedy. (06:49 - 08:13)

8. 1 F O the CN one – One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
   Successfully solved by Sean, highlighting their effective collaboration. (06:59)

9. 50 SOG – 50 Shades of Gray
   Both guests recognize this popular film with ease. (07:17)

10. HTLAGI10D – How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
    After a challenging moment and several hints, they correctly solve the final puzzle. (07:59 - 08:13)

Notable Quotes:
Elliott: “Don't be a ditloid...” (04:29)
Sean Hayes: “Ocean 11.” (04:53)
Scotty: “500 days of summer days of summer.” (05:28)
Elliott: “How to Lose a guy in 10 days. Fantastic. Wow.” (08:13)

Mega Clue Challenge (08:35 - 11:21)

Elliott introduces the “Mega Clue,” a more complex puzzle involving abbreviated numbers and letters within a movie title. He emphasizes that the answer is his all-time favorite movie, “The Taking of Pelham One Two Three.”

After several hints and a genre clue—“thriller with a lot of comedy”—the guests struggle initially but eventually arrive at the correct answer with Elliott’s guidance.

Notable Quote:
Elliott: “The taking of Pelham One Two Three. I love it. These bad guys, they take a subway train hostage...” (10:46)

Cliffhanger Puzzle and Conclusion (11:21 - 13:12)

As the episode wraps up, Elliott presents the cliffhanger puzzle for listeners to ponder until the next episode: “If it takes 5 Guy Fieris 5 minutes to fillet 5 flanks, how long would it take 100 fieris to fillet 100 flanks?”

Both Sean and Scotty acknowledge the challenge but don’t solve it on air, teasing the answer for next time.

Notable Quote:
Elliott: “This episode's cliffhanger goes bustling. If it takes 5 guy fieri 5 minutes to fillet 5 flanks, how long would it take? 100 fieris to fillet 100 flanks.” (11:21)

Behind the Scenes and Credits (13:12 - 14:13)

The episode concludes with credits narrated by Devin Tory Bryant, highlighting the production team and encouraging listeners to follow, subscribe, and review the podcast.

Notable Quote:
Devin Tory Bryant: “Today's puzzles were written by Jason Reich and Kevin Lehman. Talent producer is Anne Harris…” (13:12)

Episode Highlights:

• Engaging Chemistry: Elliott, Sean, and Scotty showcase their camaraderie and quick wit, making the puzzles entertaining and the banter enjoyable.

• Educational Yet Fun: The “samesies” and “Don’t Be A Ditloid” games provide both entertainment and a mental workout for listeners.

• Challenging Puzzles: The Mega Clue and cliffhanger puzzle add depth and anticipation, encouraging audience participation.

• Humorous Interludes: Light-hearted jokes and playful exchanges keep the tone lively and engaging throughout the episode.

Conclusion:

Episode 167 of SmartLess Presents: ClueLess—titled “Don’t Be A Ditloid” featuring Sean Hayes—delivers a delightful mix of challenging puzzles, engaging dialogue, and humorous interactions. Elliott Kalan masterfully guides listeners through each segment, ensuring both entertainment and mental stimulation. Whether you’re a puzzle enthusiast or new to the show, this episode offers a captivating experience that highlights the chemistry between the hosts and their guest.

Stay Tuned: Don’t miss the next episode, where Elliott, Sean, and Scotty will unveil the answer to the cliffhanger puzzle and present new brainteasers to keep your mind sharp!