SMARTLESS – "Colin Jost" (May 4, 2026)
Host: Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Will Arnett | Guest: Colin Jost
Episode Overview
This episode of SmartLess brings on Colin Jost—comedian, author, SNL’s longest-serving Weekend Update anchor, and Staten Island native. The hosts dive into Colin's fascinating (and, at times, absurd) journey: from his childhood speech delay to Harvard, from a Staten Island Ferry purchase with Pete Davidson to comedic heights at SNL. The episode sparkles with trademark banter, behind-the-scenes stories, and unexpected life advice, offering a rich, hilarious, and very human portrait of one of comedy’s sharpest minds.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Banter, Accomplishments, and Set-Ups
- The hosts launch with playful banter about travel, jet lag, and Sean’s recent Off-Broadway run—an energetic, familiar SmartLess warm-up [02:28–04:50].
- Will refers to Sean’s backstage visits from Sam Rockwell and the “adrenaline dump” after big performances [04:10].
- Jokes about Sean’s eating habits on planes lead to broader humor about sleep positions, digestion, and food choices [05:01–06:22].
2. Colin Jost’s Introduction
- Colin is teased as someone who couldn’t speak until age 4 and whose mother survived the South Tower collapse on 9/11. Anecdotes about searching dumpsters for a lost ring and co-owning a decommissioned Staten Island ferry set the tone for humorous reflection [06:35–07:11].
3. SNL Office Realities & Lauren Michaels
- Colin’s office: “These definitely asbestos ceilings...” [07:37].
- Will pitches “Adjacent Abatement,” a mold removal business, playing off Jason’s name—everyone riffing on classic bad business puns [09:25].
- Lauren Michaels: Colin shares insights on Lauren’s reserved yet surprisingly sharp humor and the new Lauren documentary [10:17–11:54].
- Notable quote:
“In fact, in some ways, he seems less known having seen it. But it was kind of moving because he is very much him.” – Colin Jost [10:21]
4. SNL Memorabilia and Face Molds
- Sean recounts Colin mailing him a form to get an SNL face mold—a unique memento [12:23–14:21].
- Jason, Will, and Colin riff on the horror (and hazards) of making these molds, including a Jeff Daniels' disaster story [15:01–15:32].
- Notable quote:
“They set the mold in the wrong way so it stuck fully to his face... had to chisel it off him...” – Colin Jost [15:09]
5. Snack Habits & SNL Stress
- Colin describes the infamous Tuesday SNL writers’ room all-nighter:
“They would cover the entire writer's room in candy...” [16:02].
- The sugar, stress, and sleep deprivation once led him to think he was having a heart attack—a panic attack, according to his doctor [16:36].
- Notable quote:
“It was a combination of stress, not sleeping, and also having all this sugar.” – Colin Jost [16:40]
6. Early Childhood/Delayed Speech
- Colin explains not speaking until nearly four:
“My mom said she wasn't worried because it seemed like I was comprehending everything... I just wasn't saying anything.” [19:12]
- He jokes about videos of himself sounding like “Carmela Soprano” as a child [17:57].
7. The Staten Island Ferry Purchase [25:43–34:35]
- Sean asks for the real story behind the “dumbest purchase of his life” with Pete Davidson:
- Turned out the JFK Staten Island Ferry was his actual commuter ferry for high school, making the buy personal [26:28].
- “It's named after JFK... It was usually the 7 a.m. ferry I took...” [26:31].
- The business pitch: Why the $280,000 ferry? Jost envisions it as a docked event/club space, potentially moveable between NYC and Miami.
- “If you put that on a dock in Manhattan, you’ve suddenly got basically a building on the waterfront.” – Colin Jost [31:29]
- Already recouped his investment through events; the money-pit rumors aren’t accurate [32:20].
- Dream: A “middle class, pay-as-you-go” swim/play club for families, not an exclusive members-only space [33:41].
8. Education and Comedy Career Roots
- High school commute: An hour-and-a-half daily trek—a bus, ferry, and subway ride [27:13–27:15].
- Harvard journey:
- Entered as economics major, later switched to Russian literature [44:08-45:19].
- Lampoon: Wrote 80 pieces before one was accepted. Didn’t know about SNL “pipeline” until he was inside the comedy magazine [36:18–39:50].
- “I started realizing that that was probably where my interest was, even if I was doing it in these other ways.” – Colin Jost [45:21]
- SNL Application: First submission ignored, but luck, talent, and timing led to eventual hire. Came in with Andy Samberg, Bill Hader, Kristen Wiig, and more [41:35–42:19].
9. From Writer’s Room to Weekend Update Anchor
- Eight years as writer/head writer before Lauren Michaels offered him the Update desk [51:32].
- “He did call me... He’s like, ‘So you think you could do update?’ like asking me.” – Colin Jost [51:23]
- Initial seasons were rough: audience skepticism, uncomfortable transitions, “thought I was going to lose both jobs.” He almost had to audition for his own job [55:14–56:23].
- “For the first two years, at least, we thought we were going to get fired every summer.” – Colin Jost [57:18]
10. Weekend Update with Michael Che—Legendary Pranks
- Michael Che’s ultimate prank: Tells audience in advance not to laugh at Jost’s jokes, leaving Colin thinking he is bombing live on-air [57:53–60:17].
- “He had a plant in the audience that he had yell out, ‘You stink.’ ...So simple, so dumb.” – Colin Jost [60:01]
- “Truly thinking, like, my career’s over.” [60:32]
- The prank’s notoriety and its aftershock for Jost became an iconic SmartLess discussion moment [58:56–60:39].
11. Impressions & Acting Aspirations
- Jost discusses his “Pete Hegseth” impression and the nerves of new SNL cold opens—even after years of experience [61:24].
- He talks about upcoming acting projects, like "Breadwinner" with Nate Bargatze, and dreams of performing in his own created project [63:59–65:51].
- “If you could wiggle your nose and have full success come as a writer or actor...which route?” – Will Arnett [65:04]
- “I would really love to get to perform in something outside—a thing that’s my own voice and get to create.” – Colin Jost [65:24]
12. Pop Culture Jeopardy!
- Colin hosts “Pop Culture Jeopardy!” on Netflix, premiering May 11, 2026.
- Sean surprises the crew with a clip where contestants correctly name only Will and Sean as SmartLess hosts—forgetting Jason [66:58–67:35].
- Notable moment:
“That Jason abatement’s starting to look pretty good, huh?” – Jason Bateman [67:48]
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “I took this [ferry]... Usually it was this one, which is again, I explained to my friends, they're like, yeah, but you also took the subway. You didn't want to buy one of those?” – Colin Jost on ferry nostalgia [26:30]
- “I've never seen Will laugh harder.” – Colin Jost, during Jason’s story about the progressive bus school [29:31]
- “Jason abatement.” – Multiple hosts, running joke for Jason’s hypothetical mold business [08:54, 18:56, 48:48, etc.]
- “For the first two years, at least, we thought we were going to get fired every summer...” – Colin Jost [57:18]
- Michael Che’s epic prank: “He had a plant in the audience that he had yell out, ‘You stink...’” – Colin Jost [60:01]
- “It just was. I mean, I think Seth was leaving. He was, you know, very loved doing the job... I think I was, like, really nervous. And I probably. That I probably smiled or laughed in a way that made people think I was kind of cocky about it when I actually felt very much at sea and panicking.” – Colin Jost [55:17]
Important Timestamps
- [07:11] – Colin joins the episode, introduced with comedic backstory.
- [10:17] – Lauren Michaels documentary and behind-the-scenes stories.
- [14:21] – The agony of SNL face molds.
- [16:02] – SNL all-nighter food rituals.
- [17:35] – Colin discusses late childhood speech.
- [26:28] – The Staten Island Ferry origin story.
- [31:29] – Ferry as a “building on the waterfront.”
- [41:35] – Breaking into SNL, hired with Samberg, Hader, Wiig.
- [51:11] – Becoming Weekend Update anchor.
- [55:17] – The painful, uncertain beginnings on Update.
- [57:53] – Michael Che’s “no laugh” prank.
- [66:58] – “Pop Culture Jeopardy!” Netflix preview with SmartLess question.
Episode in a Nutshell
This episode offers a breadth of comedic insight and heart, tracing Colin Jost’s journey from a speech-delayed Staten Island kid to comedy luminary. The laughs flow—on SNL squeamishness, business follies (the ferry!), pranks, and pop culture trivia flubs—crafted in the irreverently supportive, quick-witted SmartLess style. Jost emerges as the rare guest who is sincerely self-deprecating, insightful, and game for all the bit-driven chaos—and the guys clearly love him for it.
Final Hosts’ Take
- “You’re kicking into high gear right now. And it’s fun to watch, man. Really fun to watch.”—Jason Bateman [68:22]
- “Colin, thank you for being here. You’re a pleasure.”—Sean Hayes [70:07]
- “Every time with him, he’s just, like, easy…”—Will Arnett [71:11]
For Listeners Who Missed It
You’ll come away knowing why Colin bought a Staten Island ferry with Pete Davidson, the truth about surviving the SNL writers’ room, how to bomb (and bounce back) on live TV, and just what it takes—luck, madness, community, and grit—to ride comedy’s wildest waves.
(Covers all major segments. Ads and outros were omitted as instructed.)
