
Unhinge your jaw, it’s Jeff Goldblum. Jazz, urgency, true happiness, and ducks going to Moscow. Leave your kids with their helper, they’re good people. It’s a podcast; it’s called SmartLess.
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Jason Bateman
Hello, friends. Jason here. We are so excited that Smartless has officially joined the SiriusXM family. We can't wait to announce new surprise guests who we know that you'll love. And if you want to be the first to hear new episodes ad free and a whole week early, subscribe to SiriusXM podcasts plus on Apple Podcasts to start your free trial today.
Will Arnett
Shopping for a new home can be super exciting. It generally is. You know, you're thinking about and dreaming about what that's going to be, what that experience is going to be. But also, you know, when you start to get into it, it can be a little bit overwhelming if you don't have the right resources, if you're not set up the right way. Homes.com is home shopping the way it should be. It's more than a website. It's your partner in finding the perfect home. Get to know potential neighborhoods with Homes.com's comprehensive neighborhood details. Homes.com features the listing agent on each listing so you can easily connect. Plus, agent directory and profiles offer a detailed look at each agent's experience so you can find, you know, your perfect match. It's just so helpful. Go to homes.com to learn more. Homes.com We've done your homework.
Sean Hayes
Angelsoft offers you the perfect balance of softness and strength so you never have to choose. There are enough things to overthink in life, but toilet paper isn't one of them. Since Angel Soft is soft and strong and always affordable, pick up a pack of AngelSoft in the toilet paper aisle of your nearest retailer. AngelSoft. Soft and strong. Simple. Hi, guys. We're about to do the show. How do you feel today?
Jason Bateman
Oh, really? Feeling pretty good? I feel pretty good.
Sean Hayes
Great. You sound like it. Oh. Welcome to Smartless.
Will Arnett
Give us a chance to catch our breath. Smart, smart, smart, smart.
Jeff Goldblum
Lettuce. Oh. Willie's, like, really sensitive and kind of.
Sean Hayes
Like, he's like, delicate today.
Will Arnett
He's, like, very delicate. I am. You're picking up on a vibe.
Jeff Goldblum
I am super delicate.
Sean Hayes
We know who you are. Backwards hat kind of vibe.
Will Arnett
Like, it's great.
Jason Bateman
Took it off her.
Jeff Goldblum
Getting a little long.
Jason Bateman
He's an artist.
Sean Hayes
Little.
Jeff Goldblum
He's an artisan.
Sean Hayes
He didn't get much sleep last night. He's like Crystal Gale over there.
Will Arnett
Dude.
Jeff Goldblum
Right.
Will Arnett
Bennett, I don't know what you're doing, but you are dialed. You are dialed, dude.
Jeff Goldblum
Here comes Jay. Jay's back.
Will Arnett
You're picking up on a vibe.
Jeff Goldblum
Oh, there you are. There he is. Bellissima.
Will Arnett
Okay.
Sean Hayes
Will is sensitive today and Tired today. He's a sensitive, tired little boy.
Jason Bateman
Will it Sunday morn? Well, no, it's Sunday afternoon. It's lunchtime where you are, Willy?
Will Arnett
Yeah. Great. Great week. Long late nights. Shawnee was there.
Jason Bateman
Do some nights.
Will Arnett
Yeah, Shawnee was there a few nights in a row.
Jason Bateman
Oh, yeah. Sean, you did a little work this week too, with Will.
Sean Hayes
That was fun, though. It was really fun. Some really good laughs.
Will Arnett
Fun, wasn't it?
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Will Arnett
Oh, my God.
Jason Bateman
Oh, did you guys really work the scenes, huh?
Will Arnett
No, we did magic. I mean. Yes. Yes. First of all, yes.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, it was good.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah.
Will Arnett
Oh, was it?
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Will Arnett
And then. Then we had a couple moments. We had. We were sitting around this table that's all done up, you know, the props had put the food out and stuff. And Sean picks up these noodles and goes, somebody says something, he goes, that's really low, man. Come on. So dumb.
Sean Hayes
We were all trying to think of, like, Chinese food puns, and he was so dumb.
Jason Bateman
Was it on camera or was it just in between setups?
Will Arnett
Just in between setups. And we were just laughing because it's so dumb. Everybody's giddy. Cause it's, you know, one in the morning or whatever. Yeah. And then Pete and Sean said, oh, we got dinner. He goes, I got a meal with somebody this week tomorrow. And I go, oh, dinner? He goes, no, lunch. I try to keep. Keep my dinners free. And I said, free of what? Vegetables.
Jason Bateman
Did you get any of this on camera or is it just for your own?
Sean Hayes
But that was pretty funny. That was funny.
Jason Bateman
By the way, say something about Pete, the great Pete Thorell.
Sean Hayes
Oh, yeah, Pete.
Will Arnett
Petell is an absolute all star.
Sean Hayes
He's the best. I love that guy. Yeah, he's incredible. A total so fast. He's the first AD he's the. For Tracy that the guy basically just keeps everything on track and running and.
Jason Bateman
For everybody on this guy who runs the show.
Sean Hayes
Yeah. And so it was like one in the morning, and everybody's so tired and not in the mood for any jokes. And I. And Pete was just talking about how the scenes goes, and I said, hey, Pete. He goes, yeah. I go, can you keep your process inside? Because we can all hear it and we have enough to think about.
Jason Bateman
Did he laugh?
Will Arnett
Yeah, he laughed, but for a second.
Sean Hayes
He thought I was.
Will Arnett
He thought he was serious. And. And I could see that Pete's like, is this guy really saying this to me?
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Jeff Goldblum
Like, it's so complicated when he was.
Will Arnett
Running and Sean just did it in front of everybody. Hey, Pete, like, across the set.
Sean Hayes
Can you Just keep your. Your vocalizing outside your process.
Will Arnett
Pete Thorell, one of the all time greats. Jay that. Jay. Jay that. He came from you. He was a recommend from you. Yeah, that's because you'd worked with him and he's just the greatest.
Jason Bateman
Yeah. Pete and I have done a ton of stuff together. It's my first AD and things that I've directed. He's just like.
Sean Hayes
He's so great.
Will Arnett
He's so great. So you guys together a lot?
Jason Bateman
We've done. We did Family Fang together. We did three or four seasons of Ozark together. We did the.
Jeff Goldblum
He was.
Sean Hayes
He was the first ad. Every episode of Ozark. Those first three, four.
Jason Bateman
No, no, no. He alternated with. You rotate to. There's two of them.
Sean Hayes
Oh, right, there's.
Jason Bateman
But I. I get Pete on everything. I direct if he's available. But he's very fancy now. He's working with a bunch of, you know, directors at, you know, make me look like a little punk.
Sean Hayes
No.
Jason Bateman
Which I am.
Will Arnett
Which is weird. He worked together a lot because he said I'm his favorite. He's ever any. Doesn't matter.
Jason Bateman
I literally. I literally take work just so I could work with Pete. Like, I really don't care.
Jeff Goldblum
What.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, he. He's.
Will Arnett
I now get it. He's. He's incredible. He's an incredible dude. Anyway, the great Pete.
Sean Hayes
So wait. So Willie, I wanted to wait to share this with you today because I already told Jason last Sunday that this is one of the craziest things that happened to me. So Scotty and I were looking at real estate in Brooklyn and we go see this new townhouse. Not that we can afford it. We just were like, let's see what's around. And my broker's like, you should see what's. Anyways, it's a beautiful townhouse. It was crazy. It was like five floors. And so we're walking. We're walking upstairs, walking all the way upstairs. We get to the top stairs, totally out of breath, and I'm like, okay, great. Let's just move on to things that are real. And.
Jason Bateman
Because riding. Walking up five flights of stairs is just.
Sean Hayes
It's not going to happen in the real world. No, no, not five flights of stairs. No. So Scotty goes, let's ride the elevator down. I'm like, okay. So we got. Me and Scotty got on the elevator with one of our realtors and Linda is her name. She's great. And so it's like shoulder to shoulder. This, like, post is.
Will Arnett
Hey, Linda, if you're out there. Apparently, you're great.
Jason Bateman
Good for you, Linda. You're part of the team. One of our realtors. Go ahead. You're in the fucking elevator in a townhouse. This is a hashtag relatable. Keep going.
Will Arnett
But wait.
Sean Hayes
So, Willie, the doors close, the gates close. I press the button. Doesn't move, open, the door won't open. Press the button again. We're shoulder to shoulder. And now, even in 10 seconds in, I'm like, this isn't. I was freaking out. And 30 seconds, one minute, five minutes, she's calling the realtor. Scotty's blood sugar is dropping like crazy that night because they're double arrows. I was like, okay, so he's going to die in here. I'm going to like. It was crazy. And so I yell through the door, I'm like, call 911. So they call 911. They call 911. The fire.
Will Arnett
Give me a box of Reese's.
Sean Hayes
So the firefighters come, and just now we're like, 30 seconds is a long time to be stuck in something with that.
Will Arnett
So now you got a boner, right? Makes it even worse.
Sean Hayes
That would have fixed it. So wait, so you think 30 seconds is long or a minute? We were in there for, like, 10, 15 minutes. It was great. I had to. I had to squat down and, like, breathe. I was going crazy. So, of course.
Jason Bateman
Hey, Will, is the gum good? Does it taste good? Because it sounds awesome. Me, it's just a podcast, you know? Unreal. Sorry. Keep going, Sean. This is awesome.
Sean Hayes
I'm at the end of the story. So the fire, as the firefighters pull up, there was a latch in the door. I pushed it, the door open. I got out. That's it.
Jason Bateman
And you're out.
Jeff Goldblum
And.
Jason Bateman
And. And Scotty made it okay.
Jeff Goldblum
We're not too sure.
Jason Bateman
He's still in the box.
Sean Hayes
Sean never looked back.
Will Arnett
Sean never looked back.
Sean Hayes
Jason feigned interest. Is Scotty O. Is okay.
Jason Bateman
Is Scotty.
Sean Hayes
Okay? Let's get to the game.
Jason Bateman
How's Linda's data plan? And so you passed on this one back in the suv, did you ask.
Will Arnett
If you could put it in an escalator?
Sean Hayes
Oh, God, is that funny? All right, let's get to our guest. Jesus Christ, you guys. We're all big, big fans of this guy. He's amaz.
Jason Bateman
I'm not committing to that yet.
Sean Hayes
I promise. You are.
Jason Bateman
I don't know who it is.
Sean Hayes
And it was such an honor when he was a guest of ours in Will and grace before becoming the beloved Hollywood treasure that we know today. He used to write affirmations in the shower asking God to let him be an actor. Spoiler alert, God delivered. But before that, he was peddling office supplies to correction facilities in between auditions. Today, when he's not recording amazing jazz albums, you can see him being wizardly in one of the hottest blockbusters this year is the incredibly talented and utterly delightful Jeff Goldblum.
Jason Bateman
Oh, yes, I am a fan of Jeff Goldblum.
Will Arnett
Yes, I am a fan of Jeff.
Jason Bateman
Yes.
Jeff Goldblum
The best.
Jason Bateman
The best.
Sean Hayes
Hi, Jeff.
Will Arnett
So.
Sean Hayes
So. I'm literally crying.
Jeff Goldblum
Oh, Chef Sean, I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy to be here. I love you all.
Sean Hayes
So by the way, where are you?
Jeff Goldblum
You know where I am in my. In our apartment in Florence, Italy.
Sean Hayes
Oh, wow.
Jason Bateman
Another hashtag relatable. Jeffrey's doing is.
Sean Hayes
Do you.
Jason Bateman
You don't have an elevator in there, do you?
Jeff Goldblum
Yes, you do. Yes, we do. It's a couple of floors. It's very, very nice, but. And I want to be relatable. No. We've been living here for, you know, the last couple of years, a few years. Our two kids, seven and nine, two boys are going to school here. Lise Frances, my wife, is from Toronto. She speaks French to them. They speak now three languages because they speak.
Sean Hayes
Will is from Toronto.
Jeff Goldblum
I know he is. I have much to ask. I'm so interested in you guys. I adore you. I adore this show. And just your little tete a tete a tete before I came on Coffee Chat. Yeah, your Coffee Chat. I love so much and I love this show. But you know what I love it reminded me is people making each other laugh. If I have my druthers, I oftentimes. If I really need a lift, I'll go on YouTube and see the blooper reels for, you know, I have my favorites. You know, Julie Louis Dreyfus on. On. On Seinfeld. I love the way she. She laughs. Larry, Larry David. I love the way he laughs. Ricky Gervais, all these people have been on your show. Of course, Larry.
Sean Hayes
When Larry David laughs, his jaw becomes unhinged and he's.
Will Arnett
Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Yes.
Sean Hayes
So great. I love it.
Jason Bateman
It is true. The bloopers. The bloopers from things. It is really fun to watch because you know it's coming. And so you watch the people as it like it. It surprises them, it sneaks up on them and then they try to. They. That's full release.
Sean Hayes
It's always funny.
Jason Bateman
Better phrase than that.
Jeff Goldblum
I love it. Hey, how about. And then I, I Sometimes because my algorithm knows I like it. I guess I see bloopers from 1930s and so you see, you know, Barbara Stanwick and Humphrey Bogart, you know, forgetting Betty Davis, forgetting their lines.
Sean Hayes
I've seen that.
Jeff Goldblum
And swearing isn't that interesting. Doesn't make them.
Jason Bateman
I don't think I've ever seen anybody.
Sean Hayes
Me neither.
Will Arnett
I've never seen that. No.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, it's kind of interesting. I mean, I love behind the scenes of all kinds. One of my little obsessions is to go on now the device. And you can see interviews with everybody about the craft and directors and actors and these podcasts. We have to talk about that. If we were really at dinner and we could talk for a few hours, you know, I feel like I have so much to talk to you guys about that we need to be pithy on all these issues. But, you know, I would like to talk about the history of talk shows and the new podcast phenomenon of which you guys are now the kings of the hill and. And the form which allows us to know you and to know all your guests. So thank you for that. And because I know there are people I like, particularly on your show, that I now know better than ever. I just saw a play. We just came back. Sorry if I'm too, you know, self starting and chatty, but I'm excited. You. We just came back from a little weekend trip, leaving the kids here with. With their helper, with good people. And we saw two plays, went to in London, a gallery and saw, you.
Jason Bateman
Know, a couple of good people.
Jeff Goldblum
Helpers. Yeah, I know. No, they're good. And they did a very good job. And. But my point is that Cate Blanchett we saw in the Seagull.
Sean Hayes
Oh, how is that? I'm doing the Barbican right after her.
Jeff Goldblum
Oh, I want to hear all about that and I want to talk about theater. I want to talk about Oscar Levin. But the Barbican I'd never heard of. I'd never been in. It's a very beautiful theater and it was one of the. I mean, the Seagull I'd seen my parents.
Sean Hayes
I want to see that.
Jeff Goldblum
Well, my parents who took us to see art films in the. When I was a teenager in the mid-60s. Etc. I then remember, only this last weekend remembered that I saw a movie made by Sydney lit of the Seagull with Vanessa Redgrave and. Etc, and. And you know, a lot of people that I want to go and revisit. Anyway, we saw this play with you. Oh my gosh, Emma Corrin. Was Nina in it? She was the mother, if you know the play. And at the end we went back to see the actors, all of whom. It's a lovely cast. And I hugged. I'm always. It's one of my favorite things about a theater experience going back. Even though I love this three hour show. But I went back, everybody was lovely. I met Emma Karn. Da, da da da. And then Kate herself allowed us to come back. She couldn't have been lovelier. I've crossed paths with her. We've been in a couple of movies. Never had scenes together, but I saw her in another play anyway, for the second time, I went back. The first time was after she did Blanche dubois in Streetcar Named. Desired it. Wish I saw it. Bam. But I went back this time and I just burst. I blubbered. I burst into the deepest tears.
Sean Hayes
I do that too. When I see something great, I really get moved. Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Or some lo mein.
Sean Hayes
Or some lo mein.
Will Arnett
Yes.
Jeff Goldblum
That was really cool. I wanna talk about you guys. About food to you guys too. I love lo mein. I love all manner of food we have to talk about, but. And then my other. The point that I was really getting at is that we tuned into your show. Cause I'm doing all my research. I, you know, heard about your show. But it's mostly since I've had this assignment in the last couple of weeks that I've been immersed in it. I've seen, I've heard many, many things. I've hours and hours and hours, including her thing. And so the point is, I learned more about her and I felt like it was the best interview. And the way you guys do it, it allows us not only to know you, but your guests in a very beautiful way.
Sean Hayes
We can't wait to get to know you today.
Will Arnett
Jeff Gollo. Here comes Sean's podcast character. Every time I hear, like the seagull, I'm reminded of that line from Whitnall and I. And he says, I loathe those Russian plays. They're always filled with women staring out of windows, whining about ducks going to Moscow. Anyway, is that true?
Sean Hayes
That's funny.
Will Arnett
It's a brilliant line, isn't it?
Jeff Goldblum
It's brilliant. How do you know that? Verbatim? Bruce Robinson.
Will Arnett
I've seen that film thousands of times with. I think it's the most perfect film of all time.
Jeff Goldblum
Do you know, for years I have heard about that film and I saw the first 15 minutes. It wasn't because of the movie. I took an exit ramp and I haven't gone it. So I've never seen it. Really. And I know people highly esteem that, like you do. I know.
Jason Bateman
I went down the same ramp. I haven't been back yet. I'd like to. So you and I will do a double double feature. We'll see the. The lamette piece and. And with Nail and I. When are you back in the country?
Jeff Goldblum
Me and you.
Jason Bateman
Yo, yo, yo.
Will Arnett
I'd love. Boy, what a reaction. What? Me and you?
Jeff Goldblum
I thought you were talking to your conference. No, I know.
Will Arnett
I'm looking at my schedule now, and it's really tight. Right through Christmas.
Jeff Goldblum
Let's go to the movies. Let's do many things. You know you're my favorite. You're my best friends. Now you know.
Jason Bateman
Uhhuh.
Sean Hayes
We'll be right back. You know how people say sleep is the cousin of death? What interesting family dinners they must have had then, right? Can anyone really say something bad about sleep?
Jeff Goldblum
No.
Sean Hayes
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Jason Bateman
Now, Jeff, I want to talk about this thing about. I poll anyone who will answer this thing about going backstage when you go see a play on Broadway. And apologies to the listener, this is hashtag not relatable.
Sean Hayes
Again, ongoing thing.
Jason Bateman
So there's this thing where, well, Sean.
Will Arnett
Did it the other night. Jason, by the way, Sean did it the other night at Glen Gary Glen Ross.
Jason Bateman
Yeah. Well, okay, so now I didn't. Okay, I went, I saw Glengarry last week as well. And now I don't know those actors except for the fact that they have been on this show.
Sean Hayes
Show, right.
Will Arnett
No, you know Bob, you know Bob.
Jason Bateman
Talked to Bob at a couple of parties. But I don't think that counts in order to what I think is disruptive and potentially annoying to an actor that's just finished a two hour performance.
Sean Hayes
I know you can't tell.
Jason Bateman
Now they have to like meet and greet and, and like play host to a bunch of people backstage. They don't know except for the fact that they are also famous.
Will Arnett
But are you planning on being a handful? Is that what it is?
Jason Bateman
What are you gonna come back and you're gonna hear like, oh, you were so great.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, you can't.
Jason Bateman
Thank you so much.
Sean Hayes
Right. You can't tell if it's work for them and they want that or they don't want that and go. They want to go home.
Will Arnett
But, Sean, as you pointed out, as you point out, you are made, generally, you're made aware the stage manager will come and say so and so and so and so and so and so is in the house.
Sean Hayes
And what happens is Jason.
Will Arnett
So a lot of those people, they, they, they, they look, they, they are fans of yours and they respect you and of what you've done for some reason. And then they say, he's out there tonight. And then they go, and then they're backstage and they're like. Because it's become der to do that if you don't do it. The. Also the opposite is true. And they go, this guy, big shot Bateman, as he's known, he rolls in, puts his eyeballs on us, we pour it out for hours with our snappy dialogue, mammoth dialogue, and we're amazing. And our wonderful blocking that we're doing and everything. It's like this orchestra and this guy, he's in an Uber back to the Greenwich Hotel.
Jason Bateman
But now, really, Jeff and Sean, I'm with you, Jay.
Sean Hayes
I'm 50. 50, like, when I did Oscar, I went straight home, only because I couldn't do it. It was just too much and shaking hands. I didn't want to get sick and you know what I mean?
Jason Bateman
So I instructed the stage manager. No guests.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, well, guests, like, if they were friends that I knew, they could come backstage, but I didn't want to go out to the crowd after.
Will Arnett
Jeff, what do you think?
Jeff Goldblum
I'm glad we're talking about this because things always change and it was an issue the other night. I'm 50, 50 with you. I know exactly what both of you are saying. I want to be sensitive. It's very true what you're saying, Jason, but it' you're saying Will. And I always think, oh, boy, they know I'm here. You know, I gotta, I should, I should go back. Da, da da, da da. But oftentimes I want to go back. But the other night, and this is a three hour version of the Seagull, and they do eight shows a week and, you know, and yes, I can well imagine they don't. And so when I as I, I guess is the way to do it, you know, contact the nearest person with a bag who looked like, you know, an usher or da da da, or the house Manager comes up, I said, is it okay? How can we will be okay if. Would it be, you know, I don't want to bother anybody, but what if we want to go back? Et cetera, et cetera. At first, there seemed to be. In this case, and it was uncommon. I hadn't encountered it before. They said, here, here's what they did. They were like already making faces, et cetera, et cetera. So I made it clear right away. I got the picture and I said, okay, I get it. Well, whatever works. You know, if it would be nice for us to go back, we. We're available, but please, I don't want to bother anybody. Or if that's not cool that I want to help the serve them, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Anyway, by the end, she said yes, sent him back, and she was very nice. I was very aware of the time. I went, oh, my gosh. I was blubbering, but also excusing myself quickly. I said, here, this is Emily, my wife. And all. So great. And goodbye, goodbye, Go, go home. And da, da, da, da, da. And that was it. But so it was a whole. Yeah. So I'm glad we're having this conversation.
Jason Bateman
Because it is a thing.
Sean Hayes
Ultimately, I think it's better to err on the side of going back because it's a nice thing to do and it's a nice. And people. What actor doesn't like to get like, hey, great job.
Jason Bateman
Well, what about. Should I do a follow up then with our. With cause Kieran and Bill and Bob. I guess it would be appropriate for me to potentially text them. Should I text them?
Will Arnett
I would definitely do what you always do, which is have Amanda write something up and then you send it.
Jason Bateman
Hey, but Sean, how was it going back? Were they receptive?
Sean Hayes
Oh, my God, it was so fun and easy and they loved it and they love people to come back there. And I was hanging out with Karen, and Karen poured me a glass of whiskey to share with him, and I was like, I don't.
Jason Bateman
They say something like, so we heard Bateman was here last week. What's his problem?
Sean Hayes
Your name was not brought up by him once. They all love the show so much.
Will Arnett
Nobody wants to bring your name up.
Jason Bateman
They're all so hurt because, see, I like. I think it's presumptuous for me to think that they know I'm in the audience and.
Sean Hayes
Or that they want to see you. Right. I know, it's tricky. It's tricky.
Will Arnett
Listen, listen, listen. We're not going to solve it Today. But what I want to get to. Because we mentioned Toronto, you're wife being from Toronto and French and stuff. But what I want to get to. And I've always. I've never been able to talk to you about it. We've only sort of run into each other a handful of times. We don't know each other. Jeff, I'm a massive fan of yours. Like everybody else. I just think that you are just incredible.
Jeff Goldblum
Thank you.
Sean Hayes
Me?
Will Arnett
You.
Sean Hayes
Me.
Jeff Goldblum
You.
Will Arnett
You also worked with, you know, a very prominent and prolific and talented genius Canadian director by the name of David Cronenberg when you made the Flight.
Jeff Goldblum
Yes, sir.
Will Arnett
What a film. I love that film. Can you now I talk a little bit about. About that process of working with David Cronenberg, if you might.
Jeff Goldblum
Yes, I might. And I will. And here I go. I love him. Here's what happened. What happened? It was 1986ish, I think. The script came to me. I was immediately struck by it. Did I? There wasn't a. I met him. Was there a reading? I don't think so. We met and. Da da da da. And they offered it to me. And then. Yeah, and then. And it was great. He was wonderful. It was the most proactive I'd been creatively at that point. I had. I worked on it like I always do, conscientiously, but I had. I was very passionate about it. I wanted to make it work. I had a big feeling about it. And. And he, as you've probably heard, is a. Even though he makes those wild movies, is a very buttoned up, kind of sweet Canadian civil, polite, delightful, smart, intellectual artist who marches to his own drum, of course. And that movie, I'd seen all his other movies, the one prior to that was the one with Chris Walk and Dead Zone, which I liked a lot.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, that was great.
Will Arnett
I used to always do this Dead Zone. I wanted to do a remake of Dead Zone. But when the guy, you know, he grabs the arm and he see the future, right. He touches people and he can kind of see their future. I wanted to do a ver remake when he grabs people, but all he can see is he can give you traffic updates. So he grabs you and he goes, don't take the 405. You know what I mean?
Jeff Goldblum
That's good. I'd like to say that. So. So it was great. So we rehearsed and then. And you know, Chris Wales, who won the Oscar for the special effects makeup, had. And David and I got together and did these camera. These elaborate camera tests for which they had designs and. Da, da, da, da. And it was five hours finally, in makeup. But he was great. And we went from scene to scene, and actually, I had a kind.
Will Arnett
We were.
Jeff Goldblum
I had a vigorous conversation with him about the ending. There was an ending which had me painted me retroactively in a kind of villainous. Even though I try to kill her at the end and meld all three of us. And then she goes with this guy John. Get. She kind of goes. Gets with him finally. And by that time, I had so kind of. I was such an advocate and a passionate protector of my character. I was possessive, and I didn't want her to wind up with him.
Will Arnett
Wow.
Jeff Goldblum
And I said, you know, wait a minute, wait a minute. Couldn't it be that. Et cetera, et cetera. We had some. I had some dumb idiot conversations. Who was I to talk to him about that? But as it turns out, that's. It kind of. Of wound up ending kind of like that with her, you know, killing me. And we don't have that aftermath where, you know, the bad guy's gone and. And she's now with this other guy. So I was happy about that. But it was a very, you know, arduous, but lovely, passionate experience, et cetera, et cetera. I could tell you much about it.
Sean Hayes
It's a great film.
Will Arnett
It really loved it.
Sean Hayes
It's a great film. Do you think that was the. The one that kind of really, like. I mean, you've done tons of work before then. Was that the movie that put you over the top or. Or Invasion of the Body Snatchers or. What was the one that kind of like, was.
Will Arnett
Big Chill was before that, right?
Sean Hayes
Oh, big Chill, right, Big Chill.
Jason Bateman
Yes.
Jeff Goldblum
Yes. It was stepping stone to one thing led to another, and luckily, because I was like my teacher Sandy Meisner said, takes 20 years to even call yourself an actor. And luckily I had right away, miraculously good some parts, but small parts that led to bigger parts. And I felt like I was learning and, you know, I guess career wise, even though that hasn't been my focus, you know, from the start, one thing did lead to another. So, yeah, there was, well, Nashville. I worked with Altman and I did that movie. Nashville.
Sean Hayes
Very little. California Split.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, that was nice to be in. And California Split, but then Invasion of the Body Snatcher's Philip Kaufman. Fantastic. And that was. I did a movie in 76 before that with Joan Micklin Silver that I got some attention for. And that led to some other things, actually. Lawrence Keston saw that, and I think that's what led him to be attracted to putting me in the Big Chill, which led to. Yeah, now we're up to the fly and, you know, et cetera, et cetera.
Sean Hayes
Et cetera, what we're up to.
Jason Bateman
But wait, truth to you doing the prequel, the Maggot? No.
Sean Hayes
Jesus.
Will Arnett
Nice, Jason. Good for you, dude.
Jason Bateman
You give me a little bit of time, I will work on some stuff.
Will Arnett
Yeah, no, but, you know, you. You have done. You have played, you have done so you've been very prolific and you've made a lot of films. And so I always want to know. We always sort of ask, what. What was the first thing you talked about? Your parents taking you to see film when you were a teenager, which is great. So I'm sure that. That maybe you tell us inspired you, but what was the first. What was your first professional gig where you went, I'm gonna do this. And then you actually went out and did it and worked and did a job?
Jeff Goldblum
Good question. It was a wild adventure of the heart. When I was 10 years old, the seed was sort of planted. I got the bug. I was in this camp. I was a part of this drama show, and my dad had already said, if you find something you love to do, that might be a vocational lighthouse and come. Something clicked in me after this kind of thing when I was 10, and I thought to myself and kept secret to myself, this is what I want to do. I had it.
Jason Bateman
This was a theater camp.
Jeff Goldblum
No, you know, it was a Chatham, in Pittsburgh, where I'm from. Music Day Camp. It was called. It wasn't Sleepover. It was six weeks. And they had. I loved this group of people that was different and more my family than the kids I'd gone to school with. And. And I seemed to excel at. At art and piano and. And badminton and softball and arts and crafts. And they had this acting little, little moment in the day, and at the end of the six weeks, they cast me in this Gilbert and Sullivan takeoff thing where I sang and I was the. The lead in that. And I kind of rehearsed, you know, with my mom and da, da, da, da. And, you know, and I leaped. Leapt on stage, which was my first entrance, and that was it. And I got some laughs, and it was fun. It was exhilarating. And it was after that that they said, hey, how'd you like that? And I went, yeah, I like that. I like that.
Will Arnett
But I kept that drug.
Jason Bateman
Did that inform high school choices and college choices and. No.
Jeff Goldblum
Well, here's what happened briefly between 9th and 10th and 10th and 11th grades in Pittsburgh. There was a six week offering at Carnegie Mellon University in art. And I, it's taken by six, you know, had some flair for that. And then music. Da, da, da. And my mom was taking me through the brochure and she said, you want to go to this thing? I said, yeah. She said, well, they have this acting thing. I said, maybe, maybe this, the acting thing. Maybe I'll do that. Really? Yes. Well, I did that. And I was by the end of that and I did it for two years running. I, I was deeply in love with that campus and acting and, you know, just, that's when I started to write on the shower door every, every morning, please God, let me be an actor. And then I tried out for that school. They turned me down. I had, I gave a couple of bad, you know, I gave a bad audition to get into the school. It's very competitive. But one of the teachers there, Mordecai Lawner, said, oh, I used to teach with Sandy Meisner. I took with him. Then I talked with him, you know, I'll help you on, you know, on audition if you want to go to New York and auditioned for NYU and then check in with Sandy Meisner. I did Sandy Meisner. I lied about my age. You weren't supposed to be 17, but I said I was a year older than I was. I got in and that's what happened. I went to the neighborhood playhouse in 1970 when I graduated high school. And at 17, just turning 18 that fall started that course.
Will Arnett
I love you. He always hear stories about people lying, lying about their age to get in the army, never to get into theater.
Jason Bateman
School, but no, no college, Jeff.
Jeff Goldblum
No college that, that, you know, being in that college six week, that, that was, that was it, Jason.
Will Arnett
And I respect that.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, yeah, well, that's good. But this was a fancy two year program if you really wanted to be an actor. And I think, and they used to. Sandy Meisner and other people that imitated him has have a jaundiced eye, make kind of comments about the college programs he did at the time going, that's not where you learn to act. We from the group theater know what we're doing and they require you to be a little more cerebral and academic. And this is about, this is a real studio and I'm gonna teach you the real thing. And he was that real thing. And I was imbued with that.
Sean Hayes
That's so cool. Talk to me about, is this true? One of your survival jobs was to do office Supplies for prisoners. Like to get them office supplies. How in the world.
Jason Bateman
Sharp pencils and things like that.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, like, how in the.
Will Arnett
How in the world did you blunt them?
Jeff Goldblum
Here's what happened. That's a nice red drink you're drinking there, Jason.
Jason Bateman
Thank you. It's just Ritz red wine. That's spoiled.
Jeff Goldblum
Really.
Will Arnett
Really.
Jason Bateman
No, it's electrolytes.
Jeff Goldblum
I like a nice. Oh, I see. It's like a Gatorade. I like a nice mocktail these days.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, you know, I've enjoyed a couple of those recently. I think they're starting to get that down.
Jeff Goldblum
All these restaurants have on the menu, you know. Oh, they're good.
Sean Hayes
I did. They're really good. Good.
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Jeff Goldblum
But, but the answer to question. Oh, yes. So I, I lucked into, like I say, a couple of jobs. Two Gentlemen of Verona. The first thing I did on stage at the, in the. At the Delacort was a big hit. Raul Julia was in it. G. McDermot wrote the music. I was in the chorus. I just kind of lucked into that and then it went to Broadway. I stopped the second year with Sandy Meisner, did this year on Broadway as one of the chorus members and understudied one of the bigger parts and then went back second finish that second year work with Bill Esper, who people may know. So I did that and then auditioned for a play. I'll granted Coca Cola got that. And then Altman saw me in that and I auditioned for my first movie, which was Death Wish. And I started to work right away, in other words. And I was even supporting myself and all that, except when I came to California in this four years later after doing Nashville and a couple other things and kind of moved out here and got an agent, Abby Gressler. There was a moment when I was paying rent and my money was getting low and I thought, geez. I looked in the trade papers and they said, hey, are you an out of work actor? You want to make a little money, come and do this thing? So I joined this boiler room operation, which I guess is illegal. At six in the morning you go to Hollywood and you go to this place and you call correction institution on the east coast and you say, hi, I'm Bob. And we have a surplus government surpla program just went bust and we have a surplus of magic markers and pens and pencils. Can I send you. Do you use the green or the red or the blue? Can I send you a gross of the. You know. And you get them to commit to that is my least Favorite thing. And maybe not coincidentally, after a week of. That was only my straight job ever. After a week of that, I got this illness. I wound up in the hospital. I'm just too sensitive for that kind of regular, regular work. And after that, I. I went back to supporting myself, luckily, and ever since with acting.
Sean Hayes
That's amazing.
Will Arnett
Well, I, I. Jeff. So you're saying that selling the markers wasn't a highlight of your career?
Jeff Goldblum
I didn't get that at first. Wow, that's very good.
Jason Bateman
I know.
Jeff Goldblum
You guys. Sharpest tax.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, it was.
Will Arnett
It's a tick.
Sean Hayes
By the way, remember Cats and Dogs? We did that movie together, although we weren't on screen together. Remember that movie?
Jeff Goldblum
I have. Look, I. I know I have. I. These are all the things I want to talk to you about, but I wrote down several things. Well, I were several things, you know, that overlap with us. Connections that we have. And I have. I. Not only Will and gr. Cats and Dogs and. Really? Okay, okay, watch this. So here it is. I have Sean Hayes. Hey, I like that. I like just free associating. Anyway, and anyway, now here's our connections. Oh, my God. Well, Will and Grace. Cats and Dogs. Hey. Of course, you portrayed Jerry Lewis, and I was supposed to play his son in that last movie. He did Max Rose, which Kevin Pollock finally did because I had a scheduling thing. But Jerry and I hung out in order to bond at his office in Las Vegas for a day. And that was fascinating because I had grown up with his. I. I kind of adored him early on.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, yeah, same.
Jason Bateman
Wait, Sean, when did you play Jerry Lewis?
Sean Hayes
2000.
Jason Bateman
And. And in what, nine years?
Sean Hayes
What? Can I see this in a movie? I don't know where it is. It's. It was Jeremy. Jeremy Northam.
Jason Bateman
Northam.
Will Arnett
Okay. Okay.
Sean Hayes
He played Dean. Dean Martin.
Jeff Goldblum
So it was about the. The duo, and they're getting together and they're breaking up. I'm so fascinated. I've read a lot about this.
Jason Bateman
What film is this on? Why are you trying to bury it?
Sean Hayes
It's called Dean and Jerry. I don't know.
Will Arnett
It was Dean and Jerry. And where. And where is it streaming? Is it on Tubi? Because Jason doesn't get to me. He's not sure.
Jason Bateman
Well, hang on. I don't know. Do I get.
Will Arnett
Do I have to be.
Sean Hayes
Oh, my God, yes. What's that? Oh, Martin Lewis. It's called Martin Lewis.
Will Arnett
Was this a TV film?
Sean Hayes
Cbs. Yeah, it was tv. Yeah.
Will Arnett
Oh, it's a CBS TV film. Well, that's why you're being cagey. About it. Okay, so listen.
Jeff Goldblum
I love that.
Sean Hayes
So I didn't remember that until he just told me. Scotty just told.
Jeff Goldblum
I want to talk about, though, that comedy. Do I want to talk about Jerry? I want to talk about Dean. But how about. But talking about you guys. How about the trios? How about. Which brings me to the Three Stooges, of course. And, well, there's the March Brothers. And how about applause? I loved it.
Will Arnett
I love commitment.
Jeff Goldblum
I love that.
Will Arnett
I believed every moment of that view.
Jeff Goldblum
I was transported. Oh, my God. Now, wait. The Three Stooges I loved when I was a kid, I saw all of their things on television. But listen to this. I saw them live. They came to a place called the holiday house in 1960, it must have been. And, you know, do two or five or something. And I saw Mo and Larry and Carly Jo at that time.
Sean Hayes
Yes.
Jeff Goldblum
And they came into the audience, I remember. And my sister, two years younger than me, was like five or six or something. Mo, who had big bags at that point, did something to her, kind of aggressive. She burst into tears and she kind of retreated. And, you know, he later got his.
Jason Bateman
Eyes done and didn't have that problem anymore.
Will Arnett
Wow.
Sean Hayes
Different mode, different mode, different mode.
Jeff Goldblum
Hey, promises, promises. Jerry Arbok was the original.
Sean Hayes
I love. And by the way, I went three times, and you came backstage, and I appreciated that, so thank you.
Will Arnett
Oh, now we're full circle. Now we're full circle.
Sean Hayes
All right, let's move on to Jason and Will or I have a bunch of questions for.
Jeff Goldblum
Well, Oscar Levant. Listen to this, though. My grandmother, Anna Katz, claims she dated Oscar Levance, who's also in Pittsburgh on one occasion. Now, I don't know if that meant he flirted with her, if they had some encounter. I don't know what that means. But anyway, Sean, you did not discover.
Jason Bateman
That during your extensive research.
Sean Hayes
I didn't, but I'll use it.
Jason Bateman
Okay.
Jeff Goldblum
Will Arnett arrest go Well, I love. I saw every episode of Arrested Development, by the way.
Sean Hayes
Fox network. Oh, it's amazing.
Will Arnett
Sean's character goes. What channel was it on?
Sean Hayes
Yeah, exactly. Put in five.
Jeff Goldblum
So. But I saw. But I loved all your. Every character in it, of course. Eliza Minnelli. I. I knew a little bit. Charlie's their own. Fantastic. But you, the magician, the magic in that. And I know you've talked about magic before. I did magic in that. In that movie Nashville. And I had in Wicked. I do a little magic. So, yes, we could talk about.
Sean Hayes
You are magic.
Jason Bateman
You are magic.
Will Arnett
I bet you. You strike me, Jeff is the kind of guy who knows like a few card tricks and a few sleight of hand things. Do you?
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, I know. I. Well, Robert Alden told me to learn something. I had this guy in New York taught me a bag full of tricks. I brought it to Nashville and we used a bunch of them. The only thing that I've kept up my sleeve are these rope tricks. Yes. Which I've pulled out too many times and I know that. And then I know one car trick. That's all I know. But the, the rope tricks I can.
Jason Bateman
Do the rope trick, that's always tough. You got to make sure you're in a big group for that.
Sean Hayes
So, Jeff, I want, I want to.
Jeff Goldblum
I'm pitching that as a halftime show at the Super Bowl. I think those rogue close up magic would go over well.
Will Arnett
Sure.
Jason Bateman
We'll be right back.
Sean Hayes
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Jason Bateman
And now back to the show.
Sean Hayes
I want to talk about the famous Jeff Goldblum delivery, which is like you're known for. It's brilliant. It's made you.
Will Arnett
Don't break it down. Don't break it down. Don't break it down.
Jason Bateman
What do you mean? Don't talk about a magic trick.
Sean Hayes
No, I want. I thought this was interesting. I read that in Invasion of the Body Snatchers, kind of when you kind of discovered this thing, and it was the line, I never thought they would come in metal chips. Is that right? Right?
Jeff Goldblum
Yes.
Sean Hayes
And now I would say it. I would have never thought they'd come in metal ships, but you would say it.
Jeff Goldblum
I, I never thought they'd come in. In metal ships. I, I don't know. I'm not making that up. I, I have no idea.
Will Arnett
Really good, by the way, that's really good.
Jeff Goldblum
I'm doing a caricature of my own, you know, fun footery. I don't know. I don't know what.
Sean Hayes
I love that.
Jeff Goldblum
But it was at that moment that Phil Kaufman Said, oh, yeah, that's good. I like the way he did that. And I kind of thought to myself, hm, check, check. Notice myself. I think, yeah, that's something. That's something I can build upon. Something like that. Anyway, so there we go. Horton Hears a who.
Will Arnett
Oh, yes.
Jeff Goldblum
Legos. My kids and Legos. Now chase Ozark. Wait a minute, wait a minute. You know, I did this. I did this series recently, Chaos. I played Zeus. And you know who played my wife? Janet McTeer.
Jason Bateman
Oh, boy, she's a beast.
Jeff Goldblum
She's wonderful.
Jason Bateman
She's incredible.
Jeff Goldblum
She's incredible. And you know who I know a little bit have not seen her since when she was like, what, 12, 13, 14, something like that, I think, or 15. This girl came backstage, I think this is how it happened to see me in the pillow, man. I did this thing at the booth theater with people, you know, it was. I enjoyed doing that. So she came back, I think, then said, oh, I like what you do. You know, I want to be an actress. Maybe could we talk sometime? And you'll tell, you know, I have a script. We could, you know, read something or. Or. And you'll tell me. I said, sure. She seemed like an interesting and. And smart girl. That was Julie Garner.
Jason Bateman
Oh, wow.
Will Arnett
Wow.
Jeff Goldblum
And I have not seen her since. I haven't seen her to congratulate her on everything that's gone on. She's interesting, isn't she?
Jason Bateman
Oh, yeah. So what a sweet, sweet person. Just a monster talent. Yeah.
Jeff Goldblum
Oh, my gosh. Well, you know, and then of course. Hey, Will spe. Hey, we did the Switch. You and I do.
Jason Bateman
We played. We played best friends. Yeah, Best friends in. In the switch with. With Ms. Jennifer Aniston, directed by the great Jennifer Anderson. Yeah. Will Speck.
Jeff Goldblum
Josh and Will Speck and Josh Gordon, who. Who directed me in some of these apartments.com commercials I adore.
Jason Bateman
Is that right?
Will Arnett
No kidding.
Sean Hayes
By the way, I love those commercials.
Will Arnett
Will Speck and Josh Gordon, who directed Blades of Glory that years ago.
Jason Bateman
Degrees of Separation.
Will Arnett
That's right. Jeff, who were your. You know, you hear these stories about actors like these. Like, you know, the great Gene Hackman just passed away and you hear like, he was roommates with Robert Duvall and Dustin Hoffman. And then you hear these different people who came up who were sort of your gang. Did you have like a gang of actor friends that we didn't know about or like people that. Who worked a lot and you guys were all coming up at the same time or was it a more solitary existence for you? Meaning did you have no friends.
Jeff Goldblum
You know, I fit into the more solitary category. Category? Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do you mind your business and stay in a, in a, in a dark room by yourself like me?
Jeff Goldblum
Well, I like time. I have my homework. I'm kind, I'm a good boy, and I'm conscientious and I play the piano for an hour every morning and I work out and I, I like to work on my things. I'd rather not. I don't, I don't stay up late in order to hang out or all of that stuff. So, you know, there's that.
Will Arnett
But you can be friends with us by itself.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, exactly.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah. You're hard workers, obviously, but I adore people and I, you know, like I said, you know, I can imagine being pals with you. And I have a good friend, Gary. And Ed Begley Jr. Is a good.
Will Arnett
Friend from Arrested Development. We love Ed Begley so much now.
Jason Bateman
Are you a concert pianist like our friend Sean Hayes?
Sean Hayes
He's a jazz, Incredibly accomplished jazz pianist.
Jeff Goldblum
I don't know. I'm a humble student. But I, I do like the jazz. I, I, you know, I started off getting the chops playing Charney and, you know, John.
Sean Hayes
Oh, Charney, sorry.
Jeff Goldblum
And this and that, and then discovered the fake books and are now called the real books and, and jazz. And I fell in love with that. And that's what happened. And then 30 years ago now I put it in some movies, the fly character plays the piano. And in our.
Will Arnett
That's right.
Jeff Goldblum
And in plays. I put it in a couple of plays. And then 30 years ago, Peter Weller said, hey, you know, we did this movie by Garbanzo. He said, let's get together and play a little bit. And a couple of people to Miles Davis, who he knows, and said, oh, you and Jeff should go out and play a gig and you'll get better and enjoy it. And that's what we started to do. So 30 years ago, I've had this group. Peter Weller kind of went off and did wonderful things, but I've kept this group.
Will Arnett
Peter Weller, who also worked with David Cronenberg on Naked Lunch and who is also first cousin of Fred Weller, good friend, theater actor.
Jeff Goldblum
Love Fred Weller. I saw him in a play. I saw him on stage. But how about speaking of the movie game? So the Naked Lunch takes us to Judy Davis.
Sean Hayes
I've never met her, but I, she's great.
Jeff Goldblum
Which takes us to husbands and wives, which takes us to Sydney Pollock or many Other people.
Will Arnett
So you had a role in Annie hall as well. So that takes us. We're going. I mean, so wait, Jeff, the.
Sean Hayes
The. Has jazz music, like playing jazz music. Have you ever had to make a decision about doing acting work over your music? Or do you always kind of make sure everything's separate?
Jeff Goldblum
Separate. They went on parallel tracks. Like I said. At 10, I had my heart set on being an actor in my life as a career.
Sean Hayes
Like, have you ever turned down a big movie because you're like, I can't. I have a gig.
Jeff Goldblum
Nope, nope. No, I have not. As a matter of fact, I have gigs coming up. We have our fourth album on deck and verve coming out April 25th and around that. And so in support of that, we're going to these places to play. We're going to play the Palladium and in London. We're going to be in Toronto at Massey hall, etc. Etc.
Will Arnett
Dates. Give us some dates on those. You have dates on those, Jeff, let's plug in.
Jeff Goldblum
April 25, this May. By the time people hear this may be too late, but we will have been at the. The Palladium. And my two boys who play the piano and I work with them where they have a great teacher, but I work with them, are going to come on stage with. It's a surprise. Nobody knows yet. They're going to come on stage with me and play something. I hope that's not abusive. I hope they have a good experience. And that's. I think it's great for. Anyway, we'll be there, then Luxembourg we go. And then on the 26th of April, then May 25th, Atlanta Symphony Hall. May 27th to the 31st, will be at the Carlile, the Cafe Carlisle in New York City. You've been to the Carile? Played there before.
Sean Hayes
I saw you play at the Troubadour, I think a long, long time ago.
Jeff Goldblum
And you're mixing me up with. With Bob Dylan or something?
Sean Hayes
I don't know. No, no. Then it was somewhere else in la. La. It was like a. I just. Anyway, it was. It was.
Jeff Goldblum
I've been all over the la. Yes. And I did a play at the Whiskey a Go Go down the block from Believe it or not, El Grande de Coca Cola. Yes, it was a cabaret theater.
Will Arnett
Any good theater? Stories from the Whiskey Go Go. Anything happened there? That was. Sean. Started to cut into your mind.
Sean Hayes
Jeff, I always ask people if you have any crazy, like, mishap theaters.
Jeff Goldblum
All right, I know you do. Well, I did the Mooney Shapiro Songbook, which there Were five of us. Julie, Judy Garland. Gary beach was in it from. Yeah, yeah, Gary Beach. Of course he was. There were just five of us singing and dancing. We were at the Morosco Theater and we were rehearsed for four weeks. We previewed for two weeks. Opening night seemed to go well. The reviews came out. They weren't so great for the play. I got nice reviews and then Stuart Ostrow called me up and said. So. So we're not going to be doing it anymore. What? What do you mean? Well, Tuesday. Tuesday. This coming Tuesday. I know. We're off tomorrow. Monday. No, no, we're. That's all. We didn't sell enough advanced tickets and the reviews didn't. It closed opening night, so that's a kind of. I don't know how funny that story is.
Sean Hayes
So. Wait. So, Jurassic Park. I just want to talk for two seconds because I was so jealous when you can't. You. You. I'm starting to talk. Show. Show. And you had your own lyrics to the melody, and I had my own lyrics that I was singing for years and years. And it was.
Will Arnett
Put a wallet in his mouth. Sorry.
Sean Hayes
And can. Do you remember yours? Mine went like this. Kill the dinosaurs, Kill the dinosaurs. Kill them all before they eat you. And that was all I had. And then you came on and I was. Because.
Will Arnett
And you had years to work on that yourself.
Sean Hayes
Begs for lyrics, doesn't it?
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, I don't know if it begs for it, but here's mine. Here's all I know in Jurassic Park. Scary in the dark. I'm so scared that I'll be eaten.
Will Arnett
Yeah, that's good. This is a lyric.
Jason Bateman
Now, Jeff. Jeff, with all of the films that you've done, all the projects that you've done, you've done it all. Does. How do. Does the way that you choose what job to do. Has it changed over the years since you've checked so many boxes? Like what. What. What gets you to work? What. What gets you to say yes nowadays?
Jeff Goldblum
A good question. Well, it's always fluid, as you know, and that's always clarifying itself as the days and the weeks go on. But now as I have this family, which I adore, and these two little boys, you know, it's not just for any reason that I'm to go off to, you know, the ends of the earth for. For a year and. Or do a. You know, to do all sorts of things. So. So. So it has to be special and my own criteria. You know, when I was. When Sandy, I took to heart what Sandy Meisner said, and it takes 20 years of constant work and then a lifetime of continual work if you get opportunities to keep growing. And that's a good, worthwhile way to spend your life. I took that to heart. But I went through a couple of decades where I worked a lot and wanted to work and wanted to work more and exercise myself and find. And test myself and find out what I had in me and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Now, yes, I have as big an appetite as ever for creative. The creative experience, so called. But, but I don't have to die. I don't have to work every day. I don't. I don't feel, you know, ashamed. If I'm not working every day, that's okay. And so I want to do special things. Special, special things, whatever that means.
Jason Bateman
But talk about that. What I thought you were, you were about to say about. You went through a period where it was all about testing yourself. So that was kind of what drove your decisions. And now are you feeling like. I don't wanna put words in your mouth, but it's not like you don't have things to prove to yourself anymore. But is it less of a. Of an urgency? Like.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, yes, it's less urgent, although in another way more urgent. Because as we know, time is running out and I still feel. I feel like I'm doing my best work. I feel at the top of my form, I'm injury free and I feel like I'm enjoying it more than ever. I'm freer than ever and can do my best work. So I feel grand. Things could be ahead and you've satisfied.
Jason Bateman
Whatever sort of personal doubt might be the wrong word, that whatever you were working through there and sort of having fun, exploring now you've sort of found this place of not satisfaction, but just sort of like, I feel content. Thank you. And now work takes on a different role. Perhaps I'm asking all this because I feel like I'm playing with it myself.
Jeff Goldblum
Well, you're intuitive, you're a good therapist, you're a good friend.
Will Arnett
Well, we talk about it all the time, don't we? Like the balance. And what is the things that. What are the things that truly make us happy? Right. And the way that we measure our happiness, our joy, it evolves over time, especially when you add sort of kids and family and experience and age and all those things.
Jason Bateman
Work represents a different thing in different.
Will Arnett
Decades, all of that.
Jeff Goldblum
We could talk about all of that at length, but, yeah, I'm in the same ballpark that's right. And movies.
Will Arnett
We could talk about it over on Smartless After Hours, our new podcast that we're launching.
Jeff Goldblum
Well, I like this long form. This long form is great to me. I mean, I like the 6, 7 minutes you spend on these talk shows and, you know, that's another kind of thing, which would be fun to talk about, but I. I like these. I like listening to them.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, I love it, too.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, I do, too.
Sean Hayes
And then we're gonna end on. By the way, thanks for being in Italy and talking to us for an hour. I mean, this is incredible. I mean, I can't. What time is it there?
Jeff Goldblum
This. It is, you know. Oh, a quarter of eight.
Sean Hayes
Oh, that's not.
Jeff Goldblum
The kids are already. I know I said hello, but they're now in bed, so it's two. No, no, no, no, it's. No.
Will Arnett
Oh, sorry.
Jeff Goldblum
Two.
Will Arnett
But I. Sorry, I was thinking two is a quarter of eight. All right.
Jeff Goldblum
Oh.
Will Arnett
Oh, yeah.
Jason Bateman
Quarter of eight.
Sean Hayes
Yeah. Look at that.
Jeff Goldblum
Wow.
Will Arnett
Sorry.
Jeff Goldblum
Anyway. Hey, you know who sings on our new album is. Is Scarlet Johansson. And Ariana. And Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo. They have songs. Half are instrumentals and half are songs. Singers. And they. They sing. How about that?
Sean Hayes
That's incredible.
Jason Bateman
Now, Wicked. Wicked was probably as successful as everyone thought it might be. Thank God. And deservedly so. There is a second one coming that you've already shot or that you're art. That you're going to shoot.
Jeff Goldblum
No, no, we've already shot it. We shot them all all at once. But they're editing it and scoring it and special effects in it and a.
Jason Bateman
A fun process. I'll bet. Despite all the special effects and the wardrobes and. And all the those things, Wardrobe was fantastic.
Jeff Goldblum
You know, he won an Oscar for that.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, that was great.
Jeff Goldblum
But John M. Chu is. Is. Is a delightful director and a very, very masterful director and those. That cast. And Jonathan Bailey, whom I saw here in Richard ii the night before the Seagull show, by the way, he was terrific. And. Oh, and those. And Ariana and Cynthia F. It was a magical and great, great experience. I loved that show when I first saw it with Adina Menzel and Kristen Chenoweth and. Yeah, cried my eyes out. That.
Will Arnett
And.
Jeff Goldblum
And so I loved, love playing that. Joel Gray played the part originally on stage, you know.
Sean Hayes
Oh, yeah, yeah, it's great.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, yeah.
Jason Bateman
Well, just great, great. Congratulations.
Will Arnett
Yeah, Big congrats.
Jason Bateman
That's. That. That's amazing.
Will Arnett
You're a type.
Sean Hayes
It's always so fun to see you in Anything. When you pop on the screen, you're like, ah, I'm gonna be taking truely.
Will Arnett
You elevate, you raise. You raise all boats, my friend. You raise all boats. Yeah.
Jeff Goldblum
Thank you. Well, you are so fun. This is a great honor. I hope we see each other often and immediately and get back to this country. But I know now comes the part of the show, I'll say my farewells. And now. Now. No. Has nobody's sung this song? Because you always say nice things. Afterwards you have a little recap and a debriefing. But you know that song, Please don't talk about me when I'm gone.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Jeff Goldblum
You know that song? Please don't talk about when I gone. Yes. That's good thing. And then of course. Do you know that song from Oliver? You know any songs from Oliver, Sean? Well, who will this glory.
Sean Hayes
No, I know, I know. As long as he needs me.
Jeff Goldblum
Yeah. But who will this wonderful. Who will.
Sean Hayes
I don't know. I don't know. What is it?
Jeff Goldblum
Who will buy.
Sean Hayes
Wait, what are the words? Who will buy what?
Jeff Goldblum
Who will buy this? Something, something, something. Who will buy this?
Sean Hayes
Okay, thank you.
Jason Bateman
I guess has never a guest. Has never given us a bag.
Will Arnett
Okay, well, now you give it. It's so good giving us an out.
Jeff Goldblum
And of course, I sung on the. One of those albums. I sang Little man, you're crying, I know why you're blue, which is a. A version of a what you sing to your kids when they go to bed. A.
Sean Hayes
He's waving goodbye.
Jason Bateman
All right, Jeffy.
Jeff Goldblum
Thank you.
Sean Hayes
We love you.
Jeff Goldblum
I love you so, so, so much. Goodbye. I'll see you soon.
Sean Hayes
Bravo. Bravo.
Jeff Goldblum
Brav.
Will Arnett
That was amazing.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, he's great. Jeff Goldblum. We didn't get to Wes Sand. He's worked with all the greatest directors. Wes Sanders.
Will Arnett
Something like 80 films or something. It's like. It's insane.
Jason Bateman
And like. Almost no bad ones.
Sean Hayes
No, almost no bad ones. And always happy.
Will Arnett
Always happy.
Sean Hayes
Always happy.
Will Arnett
And again, another one of those. Never a bad performance.
Jason Bateman
Yeah. You never catch him acting. He's just always doing. He's got his own rhythm. And. And you know what? I think you're. You're right not to sort of dissect his thing. And not. Not that I would know how, but if I were to guess.
Sean Hayes
Well, no, I only did it because I read that he likes to talk about it.
Jason Bateman
Well, but it's like he's. You can see the next thought coming into his head. And so he races through the old thought to get to the new like there's, he's always like, that's. I don't know. I try to do. I try to think about what I'm going to say before I say it, which is how the brain works, you know? But in acting, you have to. You have the line in front of you. You know what's coming, and that's the missing point. You have to sort of like get the thought sometimes.
Will Arnett
But sometimes don't you feel like I didn't want him to share it. Like you want it. You don't want to know too much how the sausage is made. And Sean, correct me if I'm wrong, you just want to enjoy the sausage.
Sean Hayes
Sausage. That is correct. Yeah. Just the sausage.
Jason Bateman
Correct.
Sean Hayes
Yeah. That is right.
Will Arnett
That is correct.
Sean Hayes
You keep the casing on it or cut the casing. It doesn't matter. You can be cut or uncut.
Jason Bateman
Massage the casing and make sure it's all even.
Sean Hayes
Oh, boy.
Will Arnett
Boy, that took a real turn, man.
Jason Bateman
I tell you.
Will Arnett
That's a real turn.
Sean Hayes
What about the. What's that song from Oliver you said? What was it?
Jason Bateman
Who Will no by.
Sean Hayes
Oh, no, no.
Jason Bateman
I think what the better image is just sort of like a nice peaceful house there in the Italian countryside. Yeah, yeah. And put. Family's going to bed. Yeah. The kids, the kids go. You go to sleep. You go to sleep. And then you might sing them something, right? Sean, how would that song go? You know, you got somewhere you got to go.
Will Arnett
Yeah, that's lazy. I mean, you know what? Just by Smart Smart Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Bennett Barbico, Michael Grant, Terry and Rob Army.
Sean Hayes
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Jeff Goldblum
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Jason Bateman
Hey, friends. Jason here. We're so excited that Smartless has officially joined the SiriusXM family. We can't wait to announce new surprise guests who we know that you'll love. If you want to be the first to hear new episodes ad free and a whole week early, subscribe to SiriusXM podcasts plus on Apple Podcasts or visit siriusxm.com podcastsplus to start your free trial today.
Sean Hayes
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Jeff Goldblum
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Sean Hayes
Products are not intended to diagnose, treat or prevent disease.
Jeff Goldblum
See site for details.
Sean Hayes
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SmartLess Episode Summary: "Jeff Goldblum"
Released on April 14, 2025
In this engaging episode of SmartLess, hosts Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and Will Arnett welcome the charismatic Jeff Goldblum as their mystery guest. The conversation delves deep into Jeff's illustrious career, personal anecdotes, and his passions beyond acting, providing listeners with a comprehensive look into the multifaceted actor's life.
Jeff Goldblum begins by recounting his journey into acting, highlighting his early experiences at a drama camp in Pittsburgh. He shares, "At 10, I realized this is what I want to do" (32:29), emphasizing the foundational moments that set him on his path to stardom.
Jeff Goldblum [32:29]: "This is what I want to do."
A significant portion of the discussion centers around Jeff's collaboration with renowned director David Cronenberg. Jeff reflects on their partnership during the filming of "The Fly," describing Cronenberg as "a very sweet Canadian civil, polite, delightful, smart, intellectual artist" (27:05). He elaborates on their creative process, mentioning the intense rehearsals and camera tests that shaped the film's iconic scenes.
Jeff Goldblum [27:05]: "He was wonderful. It was the most proactive I'd been creatively at that point."
Jeff shares his experiences in theater, including performances in "Two Gentlemen of Verona" and his time at the Morosco Theater. He narrates the challenges and triumphs of live performances, including a memorable experience where his show "closed on opening night" due to low ticket sales despite his individual acclaim.
Jeff Goldblum [55:32]: "I got nice reviews and then Stuart Ostrow called me up and said we're not going to be doing it anymore."
Discussing his transition from theater to film, Jeff highlights key roles that defined his career trajectory, such as "Nashville," "California Split," and the classic "Invasion of the Body Snatchers." He credits early successes and networking, particularly with casting directors like Lawrence Keston, for propelling him into major film projects.
Jeff Goldblum [30:05]: "It was a stepping stone to one thing led to another."
Jeff opens up about his personal life, living in Florence, Italy, and raising his two sons. He describes his wife, Lise Frances, and their multilingual household, where his children speak three languages. Jeff emphasizes the importance of family in shaping his current lifestyle and career choices.
Jeff Goldblum [11:10]: "We've been living here for the last couple of years, our two kids, seven and nine, two boys are going to school here."
A passionate jazz enthusiast, Jeff discusses his dedication to music alongside acting. He shares anecdotes about playing the piano with his sons and his experiences integrating music into his performances. Jeff reveals plans for an upcoming album release and live performances, showcasing his commitment to blending his artistic talents.
Jeff Goldblum [51:50]: "I've had this group. Peter Weller kind of went off and did wonderful things, but I've kept this group."
The conversation turns introspective as Jeff talks about balancing an active career with family life. He reflects on his evolving priorities, stating, "Now I have to make sure everything is special and meets my own criteria" (56:50), highlighting a shift from the urgency of constant work to a more measured approach valuing quality over quantity.
Jeff Goldblum [56:50]: "I want to do special things. Special, special things, whatever that means."
As the episode winds down, Jeff shares heartfelt thanks and expresses his admiration for the hosts. The trio engages in light-hearted banter, culminating in Jeff's charming farewell, leaving listeners with a warm and connected feeling.
Jeff Goldblum [63:49]: "I love you so, so, so much. Goodbye. I'll see you soon."
Notable Quotes:
This episode of SmartLess offers a rich and intimate glimpse into Jeff Goldblum's life, blending professional insights with personal stories. Whether you're a long-time fan or new to his work, Jeff's candid reflections make for an enlightening and entertaining listen.