
Now there’s a nice fella; it’s Jesse Eisenberg. We talk ‘businesstry’ and beyond: the secret to slapping, magic, anthropology, social networks, and Jimmy Kimmel’s acting. Clip on your hairpiece... it’s an all-new SmartLess.
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Jason Bateman
Rosetta Stone's immersive lessons guide you to think in a new language from day one. There's a reason why Rosetta Stone has been a leader in language education for over three decades. So I'm gonna check in with Scotty about his goals using Rosetta Stone to learn German. And I need to sit down with him and set goals because I can't wait till he starts speaking in German. I think that's really it's one of the greatest languages in the world. I could riff on that for a while, but I'd just get back to the call to action. Today, smart listeners can take advantage of Rosetta Stone's lifetime membership. For 50% off, visit rosettastone.com smartless that's 50% off. Unlimited lifetime access to 25 language courses@rosettastone.com smartless.
Will Arnett
Whether you're listening to Smartless at double speed or regular speed, you'd probably love to know how you can get more cash back on your credit card. Either way, we'll slow things down a bit so you don't. Discover automatically doubles all the cash back you've earned on your credit card at the end of your first year with Cash Back match. That means with Discover, you could turn $150 cash back to $300 it pays to discover see termsiscover.com credit card while Hilton is always expected to have top notch service, you'd be surprised at the unexpected places they're offering it now. They've partnered with aut, which offers insanely cool Airstreams in iconic outdoor destinations. Hilton also has an exclusive partnership with small luxury hotels of the world, providing Hilton Honors members access to over 300 luxury boutique hotels across the globe. And they've added romantic and refined nomad hotels and graduate hotels in your favorite college towns to their portfolio. Explore all the new ways to stay with those Hilton Honors points you've been saving at Hilton Hilton for the stay. Hello listeners. We've got something special for you today.
Jason Bateman
What is it?
Will Arnett
It's a podcast called Smart what's what happens? Don't turn the channel. We've got a real fun show.
Jason Bateman
Who's on today, Jay, who's on?
Will Arnett
We've got a special guest that the audience you know we're talking about, but two of us do really great one. Who are the two guys that don't know who the guest is? Stay tuned to find out.
Sean Hayes
Welcome there Jason Smart. Welcome to Smart Smart.
Will Arnett
Smart.
Jesse Eisenberg
Smart Less.
Jason Bateman
I'm gonna unmute our surprise guest feed.
Will Arnett
Just give us a little clap if you're with us. All right.
Jason Bateman
Oh, Jesus, that's powerful. Clap. We were talking, Will, before you came on that, Jason. Well, first of all, we did this photo shoot yesterday, and Jason found one gray hair and pulled it out because people think that Jason dyes his hair, and he does not dye his hair. I do sometimes, but you don't either, Will.
Will Arnett
Yeah, he doesn't.
Sean Hayes
I don't. But I have these.
Jason Bateman
I have these unbelievable.
Sean Hayes
I have these grays on my temple now.
Will Arnett
What are you going to do for those for the. The project coming up? Leave them.
Sean Hayes
Keep it. Yeah, man.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, just keep it.
Will Arnett
Exactly. Why would you try to trick someone into thinking that you're different than you are? Sean?
Sean Hayes
Yeah. I'm not going to use makeup.
Will Arnett
There's only one Sha Hayes in the world. Why would you pretend to be anyone else?
Sean Hayes
We love Sean Hayes. And you look. By the way, Jason, to bring it up. You look great. You don't need to do it. You.
Will Arnett
What did I tell you yesterday? Your fa. You have a. The face of a 13 year old.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Ye.
Will Arnett
Well, you'll never look old.
Jason Bateman
I know. Okay. I was going to make another joke about some famous.
Will Arnett
I mean, look at. Look at how gorgeous Will Speck is with his.
Jason Bateman
With his.
Will Arnett
With his gray hair. Look at how gray.
Sean Hayes
White.
Will Arnett
Richard Ehrlich, the realtor in Southern California, John Slattery. You know, the most handsome actor going.
Sean Hayes
Richard Ehrlich.
Jason Bateman
I'll do it. All right. Maybe I'll let it go a little bit.
Will Arnett
Yeah. All right. Apologies to the guest. Here we come. Tighten up, gang. Now, this isn't a great intro. It just doesn't fit what this guy does. But I was rushing this morning, so today we got a fellow that's done. I apologize for the chainsaw outside my house.
Jason Bateman
God damn it.
Sean Hayes
We actually can't hear it.
Jason Bateman
Good.
Will Arnett
So today we have a fellow that's done more with his 41 years than we have with our combined 150. He's acted in film, television, been nominated for the most prestigious awards. He's written plays, directed films. He's a father and a husband, and he's here to tell us how he does it all. Gang, let's get to it. It's Jesse Eisenberg. Come on, Jesse.
Sean Hayes
Jesse.
Will Arnett
Come on, Jesse. Hi.
Jesse Eisenberg
Hi, Hi.
Will Arnett
Hi.
Jesse Eisenberg
Thank you so much for the introduction.
Jason Bateman
You're Very nice to meet you.
Jesse Eisenberg
Sorry I clapped so loud. Thank you so much. Yeah.
Will Arnett
You have large hands. Let's see your hands.
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I think I was like. I think I didn't understand where I Have to be in relation to this microphone. You know what I mean?
Jason Bateman
I know. It's.
Will Arnett
They just got to know that their mic.
Jesse Eisenberg
This is a new mic. I'm working with a new mic. Yeah, yeah.
Will Arnett
Do you do a lot of. A lot of microphone work? Do you have a podcast, everybody?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, no, no. Nor do I do a lot of mic work. I mainly used, you know, just like the. My headset. But today, you know, your podcast is worthy of this rode nt USB mini.
Will Arnett
Stop trying to get free, Jesse.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, we bought it. You don't have to sell it even across the pond.
Jesse Eisenberg
I take my road.
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
I'm in England. Oh, that's why. Yeah.
Sean Hayes
Get ready to be showered with Mike.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, right, exactly.
Will Arnett
Now are you. Damn it. You're in England doing what? Doing something else, that is.
Jesse Eisenberg
I'm in the dressing room of the, like, grand Graham. Graham Norton Show.
Will Arnett
Graham, are you really? This is not chatty man. Right?
Jesse Eisenberg
This is. I'm doing a meta press junket. I'm doing it from the press. Yes.
Sean Hayes
Wow. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Will Arnett
You're about to go out on a talk show and you're recording a podcast?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, but this is good because I can stay in this kind of like self indulgent place. I could just talk about myself for the next 48 hours and I'll be okay.
Will Arnett
You work so hard. Like I can only do one thing a day and the rest needs to be played.
Sean Hayes
Here's an idea, here's an idea. Just go with me and Jesse. You can throw this out if you'd like. And also, welcome to Smartless. But I just want to say this. Why don't we, the four of us, come up with a fake story for you to tell on the Graham Norton show that we will all then.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, yeah, right.
Sean Hayes
Because he won't know now until it comes out, which is way later. Later.
Will Arnett
Go, go, Will.
Jesse Eisenberg
So. Okay, wait, this is. This is like a prank pulled on me or him or what?
Sean Hayes
On him or on the world?
Jason Bateman
You're gonna be in on it.
Sean Hayes
It's just a fun little Easter egg that a couple months from now, people.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's interesting. Do you wanna do a whole story or should we do like a word?
Sean Hayes
Or we could do a word.
Jason Bateman
Or you could do a word. Or you could do that. You actually both of your legs are. Have been replaced.
Jesse Eisenberg
Let's do the word.
Will Arnett
This does bring up a good point. Will. Will. Unless you've got something in mind here. Yeah, it does bring up a good point.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Will Arnett
That maybe Tracy is unaware of Jesse Tracy is Sean's sister. Hip, hip to all the. The business tree.
Jason Bateman
The inside. She's on the outside.
Jesse Eisenberg
Sure.
Will Arnett
And so for Tracy, before we do talk shows, you know, the nighttime set, you do what's called a pre interview, where you talk to the segment producer and you come up with stories and crap you're going to say and kind.
Sean Hayes
Of work out, which I imagine you've done, Jesse, for this show for. Yeah, not for us.
Will Arnett
Yeah, there's a big pre interview.
Jesse Eisenberg
This one's a weird one. The one with this is Weir. Basically, like, we're on with, like, I'm with Kieran, who's in my movie. And then, like on with Daniel Craig, you're on with other people.
Will Arnett
Stay on the couch.
Jason Bateman
And so.
Jesse Eisenberg
Pre interview. Exactly. And so the pre interview with this one was like, Daniel was shooting in Italy. What was it like shooting in New Orleans 15 years ago on a movie. Basically, the link is that we both didn't shoot a movie in New York City. And so, like, I realized the stories they're going for are just these incredibly tenuous links with the guests who have nothing in common, which never.
Jason Bateman
Right, right.
Will Arnett
Yeah.
Sean Hayes
You know what's funny is that both you, ironically, you, Kir, Kieran, and Daniel have all recently or all recently.
Will Arnett
It might have been the last three guests we've had.
Sean Hayes
Yeah. On our show.
Jesse Eisenberg
No.
Will Arnett
Yeah. Truly.
Jesse Eisenberg
Well, that's the thing. That's the.
Will Arnett
Karen Kieran. What a pain in the ass he is. Jesus Christ. Just an. This guy. I mean, so negative. Not cheery at all. No energy at all. No hobbies, nothing.
Jesse Eisenberg
No, wait, I can't tell if you're kidding because actually, that does describe a version of him that I know very well.
Will Arnett
He's like, okay, the greatest.
Jason Bateman
We love you.
Will Arnett
Very nice things about you as well. We.
Sean Hayes
Maybe it's something about the fact that everybody that now that doing the Graham Norton show, you can't do it until you've done Smartless. I don't know.
Will Arnett
Yeah, work on it.
Sean Hayes
No bad ideas. No bad ideas.
Jesse Eisenberg
Something like that. Listen, I'll figure that out in the moment. Don't you worry.
Jason Bateman
But literally, the order was Daniel Craig, Kieran, and then you on our show, and now. That's crazy that you're all on the same panel on that show.
Will Arnett
What we just said, Sean.
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I know, but we can continue to analyze.
Will Arnett
Was that literally the. No, no, it wasn't literally the last three.
Jason Bateman
I think it was.
Sean Hayes
Was it?
Jason Bateman
Yeah, never mind.
Jesse Eisenberg
You know, Kieran is like the. Oh, he's like the biggest fan of your show. And just a very uncomfortable thing happened once is where he told me we were on a plane and he said, like, he loves your show so much. He said, except one episode. And he told me the name of the guest. And it actually does escape my memory now. I forgot who he said was, like, not a good guest. And then I ran into that person and I was so nervous that I had this information in my head that they were the worst guests on Smartless. And so I said to them, kieran said you were the best guest on Smartless.
Will Arnett
Tell me when.
Jesse Eisenberg
They were like, oh, really?
Jason Bateman
And you don't remember who it is?
Jesse Eisenberg
I don't remember who it is.
Will Arnett
All right, wait, let me get to my questions. I've got great questions. I'm an incredible interviewer, by the way.
Jason Bateman
It's so nice to meet you. I've been such a fan, too.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, my God, of course.
Sean Hayes
Jesse. Jesse. We met Bruce.
Jesse Eisenberg
We met each other. Well, yeah.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Will Arnett
Wait, what?
Jesse Eisenberg
Where? We just, like, it was like. It was at. Well, it was in la, like a studio. But we were doing like a promotional video with Jimmy Kimmel for Batman.
Sean Hayes
Yes, yes, yes.
Jesse Eisenberg
Do you remember that?
Sean Hayes
It was so weird with Ben Affleck.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's right. It was like a reverse engineered idea. Yeah, that's right. It was like they were meeting at a party and I was playing the bad guy and. Yeah, you came in afterwards. And I think Jimmy Kimmel came in afterwards as Batman or something. I can't remember it.
Sean Hayes
He came in, he was saying batman and Superman and then.
Will Arnett
And then Lego Batman.
Sean Hayes
And then I came in and said, lego Batman. And then Ben said something like, you're not. You're not really supposed to be a real Batman. And I said, well, you might want to check the box office.
Will Arnett
Oh, God, yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
Or something. Yeah.
Sean Hayes
Here's what I was left with. And tell me if you agree with me on that, Jesse.
Jesse Eisenberg
Sure.
Sean Hayes
I was really impressed with Jimmy Kimmel's acting. I thought he did a great job that day.
Jesse Eisenberg
Really?
Sean Hayes
And I told him that.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, I would hope so. Yeah. That's not exactly the thing I walked away with. I can't remember, was he really good? Wait, like, how so? Like, he seemed genuine.
Sean Hayes
Well, in that, I guess. Look, the bar was low. Cause I thought he would be fucking terrible.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, got it. And he was engaged. He was like, genuinely engaged.
Sean Hayes
He was engaged. He seemed like he was really listening in the moment.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, no, that's true.
Will Arnett
I guarantee you he's a great actor. You know, you can just tell with some people that they just kind of know the way they come across, and therefore they're able to sort of calibrate that and guide that, you know, and incorporate lines into that. Like, I bet he'd be a great actor.
Sean Hayes
But, Jesse, when did you start? We all know you as a very accomplished. As I said, very accomplished actor. And I am also like Sean and Jason. I'm a very big fan of your acting. I think you're really, really good at what you're doing.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, God, me too, of course.
Sean Hayes
But as a writer, when was that that you. Did you always write? Or is that something that came later?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I've been, like. I've been writing plays in New York for, like, 20 years, but this is like. And I've had, like, some, you know, some popular plays or whatever, but, like, nothing to, like, this level. Well, I had two plays that were gonna go to Broadway and were both canceled the week before we put out the press announcement for different weird reasons. So, like, this is the first thing that I'm really getting, like, more attention. And it's quite surreal. Cause I feel like, well, I've been doing the same thing for 20 years, but people like this one. And it makes me wonder where I went wrong 20 years ago.
Jason Bateman
Wait, tell me what it is. Tell me what it is.
Jesse Eisenberg
What? What what is?
Jason Bateman
You're saying you're doing a play right now?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, no, no, no. Now I.
Will Arnett
A real movie. That's.
Sean Hayes
You said.
Jason Bateman
I thought you were saying you were.
Jesse Eisenberg
No, no, no, no, no. I gave up on. Gave up on the medium entirely because I gave up on. You Got it. And so. No, no, Just now, like, I wrote a thing that's like, now. Now people like it and they're saying, well, you know, it has this unusual tone. I want to say, I've been doing that for so long, but no one liked it. But anyway, so, yeah, and before that, I was just writing, like, joke writing. I wanted to write, you know, sketch comedy when I was younger.
Will Arnett
No way. Really? Really?
Sean Hayes
Really?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. Like a packet for Saturday Night Live. Actually. When I was 16, I wrote a script about Woody Allen, and it got sent to him. It was about, like, a fictional version of him now at 16, which is what I was changing his name to Woody Allen, and it got, like, sent through various channels to his lawyers, who then sent me a cease and desist letter.
Jason Bateman
Oh, my God.
Will Arnett
But then you ended up doing three films with him. Did it come up.
Jesse Eisenberg
I did movies. It came up. Once we were on, like, a press junket. He's so uninterested in anybody else, you know. So, like, I don't mean that as a criticism. He's just like, he's just like. Basically, I knew what would happen is that somebody during press would bring it up. Cause it's like a cute story that's on the Internet. And he would go, oh, that's interesting. I never didn't know that and would never think about it again. And I knew I can go up to him and say, hey, that was weird, right? He would just have. No, he just doesn't have any interest in stuff like that. I think he's just been like so famous and celebrated for so many years that he's uninterested in the public Persona. And so, no, he didn't care about that. And we didn't share a nice laugh or a drink.
Sean Hayes
I love the idea that you're like waiting, waiting to get a response to your submission. And the response is as simple.
Will Arnett
Yeah, but it's also like, you bring up like, hey, so you sent me a lawyer letter. What about that? No, I don't know anything about that.
Jesse Eisenberg
Well, the lawyer is his producer. Like, I got to know the lawyer, but I'm sure there were 10,000 letters like they were sending that every day to everybody who wanted to make a movie about him. But I remember I was, you know, I was. I got home from school one day and my dad said, we have good news and bad news. I was like, what's? He's like. I said, what's the good news? He's like, we heard from Woody Allen. I was like, what's the bad news? He's like, you might have to get a lawyer. And he sent me the thing and I framed it right away. It was so exciting, you know.
Will Arnett
Wow, that's pretty good. So when you're writing a play versus a film, to a ding dong like me, it would seem that writing a play is easier because it's just dialogue and a film you've got to incorporate what the visual component is going to be as well and sort of imply some of the, you know, the inner thinking of the character and all that. Is that fair to say that writing a screenplay is more difficult?
Jesse Eisenberg
I mean, no. I mean, I think it depends on the project. And you could make the same argument that you have to keep people's attention for two hours on one set. And there's something incredibly difficult about that. Whereas a movie, you can have music come in and you could have close ups and you could re edit it within an inch of its Life. And it could turn into something that's test screened a bunch of times. So, no, I mean, my plays have been basically like four scenes total. So like a half hour scenes. And you know, so like half hour scenes for a two hour play. And I like that my mind works in that way to like keep scenes going. So my struggle with like movie writing is to just make sure the scenes are not 7 minutes long. Shit.
Sean Hayes
JB, he just clowned you, dude.
Will Arnett
Why?
Jesse Eisenberg
Why?
Sean Hayes
You just got totally clowned because you.
Will Arnett
I'm so clowned, I didn't even realize.
Sean Hayes
You didn't even realize? No, I'm kidding.
Jesse Eisenberg
But I thought there was. I was clowning him, but I thought there was a gentle. I was doing it gently.
Jason Bateman
You were clowning him with a baby wipe.
Will Arnett
Speaking of clowns, your mother. Your mother started another silly Internet thing, you know, because I do deep research on Wikipedia.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, yeah, it sounds like you read that first paragraph. Yeah, yeah, it's right up top.
Sean Hayes
Fucking Jesse. I want Jesse to come once a week and just come in, set JB straight, straight, and then be like, I gotta go.
Jesse Eisenberg
He read the snippet from the Google search engine, you know, where a million things come up and he read the snippet.
Sean Hayes
Now click on the link.
Will Arnett
The directing thing. Are you loving the directing thing? And I apologize, I bet you've gotten this question a thousand times. Are you loving it more, less, or the same as writing and acting?
Jesse Eisenberg
Maybe a little less. Only because it's such a managerial thing as, you know. Well, I don't know actually what your experiences have been, but for me, it just felt like I was just aware, constantly on set of somebody's plane maybe being delayed. My experience. And when I'm writing, I'm sitting in a library by myself and acting. It's like kind of an emotional, private experience that you can have. And then I just remember, like, I spent the day thinking about this person's hair person flying in from England, and if there was rain in England, they were going to be late. And then I don't think the actor would come to set. And I was like, this was the least creative thought I've had in my life, let alone on the set of a movie.
Will Arnett
Yeah, exactly.
Sean Hayes
Fucking interesting. That's such a great point.
Will Arnett
Right, right, right, right.
Jesse Eisenberg
Does that ring true for you?
Will Arnett
Yes, it can. But then I just make sure I hire correctly. You know, when it comes to line producers and ads and stuff, really, you know, they sort of. They're, they're, they're. Their sweet spot is manage that Kind of stuff.
Sean Hayes
Do you ask jb? Do you ask them to protect you from information that you.
Will Arnett
No, I actually. I actually want to hear about it all. I just don't want to have to fix any of it.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, right.
Jason Bateman
I get that.
Jesse Eisenberg
Wow.
Jason Bateman
I get that.
Jesse Eisenberg
So you don't take on, for no apparent reason at all the anxiety of their jobs?
Will Arnett
I do. To the extent that it. That it affects the harmony on the set, that. That's the part I get really passionate about, is that everybody deserves to have a great work experience.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, me too, Jesse, never having met you before, you see, But I've seen tons of your work and I.
Sean Hayes
Do you think I should dye my hair? Is that your question?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Do you think I heard about the sides.
Jesse Eisenberg
Sean, you look amazing.
Will Arnett
You look awesome.
Jason Bateman
Thank you.
Sean Hayes
Yes, yes.
Will Arnett
Sweet little baby.
Jesse Eisenberg
Listen, I was sitting there in silence just evaluating all of your temples, and I think you all look great. And you're ways.
Will Arnett
I'm. I'm in the. My piece is getting washed, so I've got the lid on.
Jesse Eisenberg
Your piece is getting.
Jason Bateman
You know. What is that. Is that a hood or what?
Will Arnett
Yeah, it's a shitty hood. There we go.
Jason Bateman
Oh, it's a hood.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, look at that. Oh, it's shorter than I thought. Okay. Yes.
Jason Bateman
My. So I'm gonna make. I'm gonna make a guess about you, and you tell me if I'm way off or not.
Will Arnett
Capricorn.
Jason Bateman
You seem. I've seen interviews, I've seen your work. You seem extremely intelligent. You very. You're very cerebral. You're. And you speak very quickly.
Sean Hayes
Okay, sorry. Keep going.
Jason Bateman
Cerebral. And so am I right in guessing that if. That one of your pet peeves is people that can't keep up with the pace of your intelligence?
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, God, not at all. No. I feel mortified and. I feel mortified and pretentious when I open my mouth. No, I. Oh, really?
Sean Hayes
Yes.
Jesse Eisenberg
I'm aware that I probably sound, like, annoying to many people.
Jason Bateman
No, no.
Will Arnett
You sound music.
Sean Hayes
How dare you?
Will Arnett
It's classical music. Turn it up.
Jesse Eisenberg
It's classical.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, yeah. That's all I listen to. Because I do. Because I get. I have a short fuse. If I'm, like, focused on something and somebody can't keep up with me. I have a short fuse.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, God. No, I don't.
Sean Hayes
Do you suffer fools?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I have.
Will Arnett
I've got a tough time with that.
Jesse Eisenberg
Deep shame and self hatred. I assume everybody else in the world is, like, kind of. Right.
Will Arnett
But what about. How about said differently? What about people who don't work as hard as you at a given moment, especially when you're kind of. What I mean, when you're directing or when you're having to oversee a bunch of stuff, you notice someone's just kind of dogging it. Like, does that get at you?
Jesse Eisenberg
I just haven't felt that way ever. I just feel like so indebted to that. Anybody's coming to the set and waking up at six in the morning and they probably have a dog that's being left home alone. No, I just don't ever feel that way. But I think I'm just encumbered with guilt. So, like, I just wouldn't. I thought. I wouldn't allow that thought to come into my mind because I would feel, well, why am I worthy of having that? You know?
Jason Bateman
Okay, got it.
Will Arnett
And we will be right back.
Jason Bateman
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Jesse Eisenberg
Person.
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Will Arnett
And now back to the show.
Sean Hayes
Did you grow up in the city? Are you. Did you grow up in New York?
Jesse Eisenberg
I grew up in Queens and New Jersey, so I'm never Manhattan.
Sean Hayes
Oh, you did?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Oh, wow.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's why I have this neutral accent.
Sean Hayes
Do you live in New York now? On the East Coast?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, I live in Chelsea.
Will Arnett
Be careful.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, you do.
Will Arnett
What do you mean he's getting close to the address? Don't give it.
Sean Hayes
No, he said Chelsea. He said Chelsea.
Will Arnett
I can tell you don't give him a street and.
Sean Hayes
No, I'm just saying. Do you want to have lunch at Cafe Clooney next week? That's all I'm saying.
Will Arnett
In the West Village for a second?
Sean Hayes
Yeah, why not?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, we could do that. Yeah. It's a great place.
Sean Hayes
I'm going to be there if you'd like to have lunch. I'm going to get.
Jesse Eisenberg
You're going to get the table.
Will Arnett
Let me ask you about this. The, the amount of focus it takes to write. I've done it once and it was a very long time ago and it was very humbling. And I've got a massive amount of respect for folks that can fill a blank page once through that process. And you've really, you know, grinded away at the wordsmith of it all. And then an actor starts to play with that dialogue on set and starts to kind of go off a little bit and round the edges and, you know, paraphrase a little here or there. Does that. Are you good with that? Or does it make you crazy? And then I've got a follow up to this and I think you know where I'm going, but go ahead.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, yeah. So no, as a. Like, again, my background is playwriting, and no one changes the words ever. Because when you do a play, I mean, as you all know. Well, yeah, that. But also, like, most playwrights are dead, so you're just not. Theater actors are not in the habit of changing dialogue, you know, and then. So this is my second movie, and, yeah, it doesn't. It rings weird to my ear, so I don't like it. But, you know, occasionally somebody so brilliant, like Kieran, as you met, he's so clever and quick and spontaneous. So, you know, he would sometimes change a word here and there, and it was always really good.
Sean Hayes
You wouldn't, like, come in. You wouldn't come in after taking. Go. Huh. Okay. All right.
Jesse Eisenberg
It's just a script. Interesting. Just gonna double check. Yeah, sorry, I'm just gonna leave it right in front of you. Just because we don't have a coaster.
Sean Hayes
You must have gotten an old.
Jesse Eisenberg
You must have gotten an old. Exactly, yeah.
Will Arnett
So then it wasn't onerous to you to work on Social Network with Aaron Sorkin's stuff, who is somewhat famously. Versus is sometimes a problem. Like, you have to really stay straight, word for word. Is that true? Was that your experience on that film? And if so, was it a hassle?
Jesse Eisenberg
That wasn't my experience, but I don't also think I tried to change anything. It wasn't like I had a clever idea that was, like, funnier than Aaron Sorkin's joke. You know what I mean?
Will Arnett
No, but just in an effort to make it sound sort of just naturalistic. And my character.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's really interesting. My character didn't talk in a naturalistic way. He was kind of like this almost robotic presence. And so actually, for me, it felt like this is perfect. In fact, the gamesmanship of, like, adhering to this exact thing was part of the character.
Jason Bateman
I just saw it, by the way, like, two. Like, last year for the first time in that film. Yeah, it was so good.
Will Arnett
And you got an Academy Award nomination for that. Yeah, that's right.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah.
Sean Hayes
So. So good, right? Shine's not the official review, so. Because I'm just gonna, like, make sure to log it. Hey.
Jason Bateman
Well, because I was like, I think.
Sean Hayes
Oh, hang on, there's more. Go ahead, Sean.
Will Arnett
So.
Jesse Eisenberg
It's so good.
Jason Bateman
Ellipsis, I think I. I avoided it because I knew there was going to be a lot of talking in it. And then. But then I watched it and I was like, oh, I wasn't. This is so fucking.
Sean Hayes
I mean, this is, this is Jesse's.
Will Arnett
Interview, but I got it.
Sean Hayes
But I, I'm. I'm having a tough time escaping from. I avoided it because I knew there'd be a lot of talking and it.
Jesse Eisenberg
Fucking go down that.
Sean Hayes
I mean, if ever there were an example of why we're living in idiocracy, this is it right now. It's a fucking blight on the entire civilization. People like you have a fucking encour just to know we're in this hole we can't get out of because you want to drool in front of the television. Hey, Jesse. Anyway, having seen, having, having been in the social network, what did it must. What impact did it have on you in, in your regard to social media? To Instagram specifically, Social media in general. Back to it back then, a few.
Jesse Eisenberg
Years later and now, I mean, I never did it and don't do it. But I don't know, I feel weird, like putting more stuff about myself online. Like it's already kind of embarrassing, you know, like it's weird to be a public person in general. So I didn't want to go online. But that mostly has to do with my just complete discomfort with myself. And so like, I didn't want to like, talk about, you know, I guess things. But, you know, I don't know, I'm suspicious of it for so many other reasons too. And you know, the movie depicts like this person creating it who does not have what I would consider kind of healthy social relationships. And so if this product is the extension of this person's social behavior, then this is not great.
Sean Hayes
Well, yeah, that's a really good way to put it in effect, that this person's behavior, this person's outlook on human relationships is now being projected exactly as a way, as a mode of living and as a mode of people interacting. And now.
Jesse Eisenberg
But think about it this way too. Like, we used to interact like in kind of ways that are kind of mushy. You know, you would make a weird joke and the person wouldn't react the way so you wouldn't make that joke again. Or you would find that somebody has the same sense of humor and like what relationships get reduced to like on like line. And forgive me, because I'm not on these things, but this is my kind of cynical attitude towards it is like we like the same band and so it hooks us up and everything. And that's essentially like the character I was playing could interact with people like that on this very much. Like we both like this band. Let's stand here and talk about it. And like, that's the way the thing works too. It recommends this person to you, or, you know, if you're dating, it recommends this person to you. And it just takes out like the squishy humanness that we have in our lives outside of the Internet.
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Will Arnett
However it. I mean, because you. You speak. You've spoken before. You've spoken already on. On this, in this episode about your. Your, you know, not to belittle it, to be honest. It is. It's charming that yourself are facing sort of, you know, that you comfortable with yourself. And I thought, like, I get it.
Jason Bateman
We.
Will Arnett
We. We all are. But I feel like these, These social media things are meant to be a tool to actually help folks. That.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's true. And probably it does. Yeah.
Will Arnett
That wouldn't get out to a bar and, And.
Jesse Eisenberg
And start.
Will Arnett
So I'm. I'm wondering if, you know, I'm sure you're right.
Jesse Eisenberg
I truly know nothing about this because I'm not on it. I haven't had the experience of being on it.
Sean Hayes
No, no. I think that that. Jason, I think that there is. That it's word sold as.
Will Arnett
Right. Right.
Sean Hayes
And. And I. And I think that in its. In its best version, were people actually looking to do that and it wasn't used as a way to enrich people, then that's what it would do. Unfortunately, what it's become is it's designed to keep you engaged to sell ads. Now what it's done is it's designed to keep you opening the app so that your eyeballs will be exposed to advertisers. We all need advertisers. I'm not. But it keeps us all employed. That is its design. And it's not to keep people engaged. And I think that there was a time that maybe that was the idea and maybe that's what the social, when it was called the Facebook was about. But unfortunately, what it has become is become this thing that's become incredibly divisive. And it is. And all it's done is reinforced instead of. Of instead of celebrating the similarities, it's reinforced the differences between people. It's had the opposite effect. It's stunning. All these kinds of things. We're talking, you know, we talk about inclusion stuff. All these things that all they've done is help create these many barriers between us all and said, I'm this and I'm this and I'm this and you're that, and we've created more division. I think. I don't Know.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, that's my perspective, but my perspective is really as an outsider because I haven't been on it, but yeah, like, that. It. It. It creates, you know, isolation, sectarianism, all this stuff.
Jason Bateman
Wait, just. Are you on social media? No, no, no, I'm kidding.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm actually. Do you mind? I'm actually live tweeting this whole thing, like, going, great. Sean said, social network is so good.
Will Arnett
Thumbs up. Now studying anthropology and social psychology in college. Yes. Now, why did you study that when you knew you wanted to do what you're doing now? Or did you do it at the same time?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, no, I was like, I went to college for 18 years before I got my degree because I would, like, go to a semester and then take off and work and then go back. And so I got that, like, got my degree during the pandemic, finally. Oh, you're certainly.
Will Arnett
It took you 18 years.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, exactly. It took me 18 years. Yeah, exactly.
Will Arnett
No way.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, like the second 18 years of my life. Yeah. From 18 to 36. And I chose anthropology because that was my wife's degree. She graduated, like, many, many years before, so that was her degree. And I just wanted to, you know, have something to talk about with her. That's cool. Yeah. Because I knew I wanted. Because I.
Jason Bateman
Otherwise it's silence.
Jesse Eisenberg
Be in the arts. Yeah.
Will Arnett
Otherwise she would not define anthropology for me.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah. Anthropology is like the study of. And I'm using quotes, the other. You know, it's the study of other cultures, the study of other people. You know, what you learn from it is that, like, your culture is not superior to another culture, even if that culture is, like, let's say, more poor or something. You know, you learn to kind of view cultures as their own value to the effect that they have on each other, you know, so an anthropologist would go to study, you know, famously go to Samoan village. Margaret Mead is a famous anthropologist. Go to a Samoan village and live with them and study their ways and everything.
Will Arnett
I literally asked somebody last night who has a master's in anthropology. I asked her to define same question last night. She said something very similar. And I said, well, what is the difference between that and sociology? And she said, sociology is much more data driven. Is that fair?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, yeah. My dad's PhD is social psychology. And so he was studying basically, like, you know, human behavior irrespective of culture. You know, it was about people interacting with each other. Anthropology really focuses on, like, cultures.
Will Arnett
Right, right, right.
Jason Bateman
Wow. So. So what? So. And you got your Bachelor's or master's or.
Jesse Eisenberg
I got my bachelor's degree.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, that's amazing.
Sean Hayes
Bachelor's degree. And then your dad's got a PhD.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah.
Sean Hayes
This is an accomplished family. Jay, what'd you learn on the set of Ned and Stacy? I remember you doing.
Will Arnett
I learned how to scoop a bed bagel. You know, that's where I started really cutting the cards.
Jason Bateman
So, Jesse. But first of all, by the time you're 65, you get your masters. But second, you. That's really funny. What. In your studies, what is the one kind of culture that you found the most fascinating or actually interacted with or whatever?
Sean Hayes
Best and least. And least, to be fair, the least fasting culture.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah.
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
Okay. The most boring culture, you guys, is. I'm doing top 10 worst culture cultures.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, I would love if you only. You got on Instagram just so you could start posting things like, the worst cultures.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah. And this one is boring but also stupid, so. Okay. This one. No, I mean, well, I kind of like. I did my, like, ethnography, which is like, you know, your big thesis. I did it on this, like, this restaurant in Chelsea that was, like, the last remaining authentic Latin American restaurant, because everything else had been, you know, gentrified away, and this place was. But it was. So. It was kind of a cheat because it was, like, down the bottom block, and I got to eat there while I was doing my field research, you know? But it was. It was really interesting to see how this place was trying to survive against, you know, basically.
Jason Bateman
So you do restaurants. I thought it was, like, cultures across the world.
Jesse Eisenberg
Like, you're like. It is. This was cultural.
Jason Bateman
Okay.
Jesse Eisenberg
It was My white wife. My wife went to Nicaragua.
Sean Hayes
Restaurant review, dude.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, no, it actually.
Sean Hayes
What restaurant was it? We can always cut it out.
Jesse Eisenberg
It was called La Taza de Oro. It's. It's not on. It's not there anymore. Yeah, we published the thesis actually, to Yelp, so it was interesting to get to publish. No, no, no, I'm kidding. You know, not every. Not every student gets their work published, but for me, it went.
Sean Hayes
I got my. My PhD from food. Food Porn on Instagram. Fucking.
Will Arnett
All right, now, what about. Let's talk about. Was Squid in the Whale the thing that sort of launched you a bit?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I was in a movie before that when I was, like, 18. Roger Dodger, right out of. Yeah, Roger Dodger. Right out of high school. Yeah.
Will Arnett
Right.
Jesse Eisenberg
And it was like. It was like the difference between having an acting career or not. Like, it was literally the difference. Cause, like, I was supposed to go to college that year, and my dad, like, I pled with him. I was like, please just read the script. It's so good. And my dad read it and said, okay, you could take off a semester and do this movie. The movie was, like, not a hit, but was, like, popular amongst, you know, people who like movies.
Will Arnett
And. And. And then that. That meant, again, God bless Wikipedia. That meant no NYU for you, but the new school, when you were done with it. Yes, yes.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, my God. Which paragraph been up to?
Will Arnett
I've been up for at least an.
Jesse Eisenberg
Hour and a half.
Sean Hayes
Are you. Is that early career in school, or are you on personal info?
Jesse Eisenberg
I think it's like they're controversies because.
Sean Hayes
Sometimes they mix it up. You know what I mean?
Jesse Eisenberg
Like, sometimes I think it's under cancellation.
Will Arnett
All right, so then. So you do Roger Dodger and you feel there's something.
Sean Hayes
Can I just say this? Sorry to get it. Can I just say it is a real. Maybe I've mentioned this before, but it's a real testament to who you are in this world when your filmography has its own page on Wikipedia. Have you ever noticed that?
Will Arnett
Oh, yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
What does that mean?
Sean Hayes
That is something else. Well, you go into somebody's and they have filmography, and it goes. And there's a little.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, transfer you.
Sean Hayes
It transfers a link because it has its own page.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, is that what's happening here?
Sean Hayes
That is the highest.
Jesse Eisenberg
That is the goal. That is the goal. You know, you've made it when you have to link transfer.
Will Arnett
So there's. There's a feeling that is very tangible that it's like, oh, I think I might be able to make a career out of this based on this. This sort of newfound access and inclusion.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yes, exactly. Exactly. And like, right after that movie, I got, like, offered another movie, and it was to pay. Hey, Scale. It was like a movie. I don't think it ever got made. It was probably like a $50,000 budget. But I remember going to my dad and, like, I could get jobs. Like, I could literally just get jobs. Cause before that, you know, I was auditioning for commercials and anything that I could possibly get an audition for and, you know, understudies and plays and stuff like that. So it felt like, oh, I can literally make a career and a possible living from this.
Jason Bateman
Wow.
Will Arnett
Right? And then what was the next big job? Was it. Was it Squid and the Whale?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, actually, no. Right before that, I did this movie, Cursed With. It was Dimension. And it was Dimension. So it was run by Bob Weinste this guy would. It was crazy. This guy. Basically, it was a Wes Craven directed movie and Bob Weinstein would just constantly scrap everything we'd done to the point where we shot. Supposed to be a 55 day shoot. We shot 125 days. Because this guy, Bob Weinstein, who's not like, you know, a writer, you know, we just decided he wanted to change everything in the script. And it was crazy. It was crazy and fascinating to work with that.
Will Arnett
I wonder what he's up to right now. I think we know what his brother's doing, but wonder what?
Sean Hayes
Probably his neck in lawsuits, what he's up to.
Jesse Eisenberg
I wanted to turn down the movie and he called me in for a meeting and he's threatened my career. And then he said at the end, as I was leaving, he said, I know where you live. I said, what?
Will Arnett
Jesus Christ.
Jesse Eisenberg
And I was like, are you kidding? And he was like, no, no, she told me his casting director. He goes, no, no, she told me where you live.
Will Arnett
Oh, these guys. Wow, what a duo.
Jesse Eisenberg
I know. Unbelievable. When all the stuff came out with the breath, I was just like, oh, yeah, I've been telling this story forever and people sometimes can't believe it. It sounds so shocking. And then of course, my story was like, nothing compared to, you know, cute.
Will Arnett
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cute.
Sean Hayes
All right. Yeah. You're like, who knew? It's just like a fun. It's fun banter for a podcast.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, exactly. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Will Arnett
Not so. Now we're to Squid and the Whale with the great Laura Linney, the incredible Noah Baumbach and Jeff Daniels. Did you learn a great deal from Mr. Baum back there and the directing? Did that plant an early seed for you?
Jesse Eisenberg
Well, it just like he was writing just stuff that amused him and so that was the trick. It's like, oh, yeah, you can write the things that you like and it'll translate, you know, hopefully. And the other main thing I learned was from Lauren. I don't know if she ever did this to you probably, but she had to slap me in the movie. Has she slapped you?
Will Arnett
Probably. Probably.
Jesse Eisenberg
Okay, so this is what she told me right before she slapped me. She said, do you know what. What the trick is to slap somebody in a movie? And I was like, no, please tell me. Thank you.
Will Arnett
Tell me she just whacked you. Surprise. Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
She goes, you look the person in the eye and then you just. You hit them with your hand. And I was like, oh, that's not a trick at all. And so she just Spent the night slapping me. And that was the trick. And then in this movie I made with Kieran, I said, you know, I have to slap him at the end of the movie. And it's this big thing at the end of the movie. And I told him, do you know the trick? I learned this from the great Laura Linney. And I was like, you just. I slap you really hard.
Will Arnett
You just gotta make sure you have eye contact.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, exactly. Make eye contact. Yeah. Which doesn't mitigate the feeling at all.
Will Arnett
No, it doesn't.
Sean Hayes
It makes it more personal. If anything, it makes it worse.
Jesse Eisenberg
Exactly.
Will Arnett
Yes, that's true. I've had to do some slaps, and I've found that you just have to change the timing of it on every single take so that you get that genuine surprise, you know.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, that's interesting.
Will Arnett
Which is not really fair to the person receiving the slap, but it's great.
Jesse Eisenberg
For the audience, you know, on Will.
Jason Bateman
And Grace, if we were to slap somebody, Jimmy Burrows would clap off the screen.
Jesse Eisenberg
Wait, what time it.
Sean Hayes
Really?
Jesse Eisenberg
Wait. But. Oh, but you were not actually near them.
Jason Bateman
Like, not here. I would. You would fake the slap. You would. You would go just in front of their face. But he would time it. He would just, you know, clap.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, that's interesting.
Will Arnett
So that the audience would hear that it wasn't a miss.
Jason Bateman
Yes, that's right.
Sean Hayes
Interesting.
Will Arnett
The great Jimmy Burrows.
Jason Bateman
And by the. By the way. And that's the sound that they would keep in the show. Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, wow.
Sean Hayes
JB do you remember season one of Arrested Development? I was in a wheelchair, and I was just. I was wearing a hospital gown, and you were leaning down. It was the end of an episode, and you're leaning down in front of me, and as you lean down, I slapped you in the face. It was not in the script. It was apropos of nothing. I slapped you and you looked at me, and my bare leg was showing because I was wearing a hospital gown. And as you got up, you slapped the inside of my leg so much.
Will Arnett
Just about as hard as I could.
Sean Hayes
Hard as I could.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, wow.
Sean Hayes
And in the show, I go, oh, just because it really happened. You fucking killed me.
Will Arnett
Right? And it was safe to do that because you're in a wheelchair. You can't possibly get up and run after him.
Sean Hayes
My character couldn't get up and run after him. So he.
Will Arnett
The character. Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, that's funny.
Will Arnett
Isn't that dumb?
Jesse Eisenberg
Was it? It was not. It was. Happened on one take.
Sean Hayes
How about one take in the show? And that's what I'm saying.
Jason Bateman
I learned on the tour of the Smartless Tour that Jason will just. I've never had somebody do this in my entire life. He will just walk up to me and slap me on my face.
Sean Hayes
Yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah. Why? Just make eye contact.
Will Arnett
Hey, bud.
Sean Hayes
I love the way you act like you're. You're just as surprised as everybody. Jason, you just went. Yeah, I know. I learned that.
Jesse Eisenberg
Isn't that crazy? Yeah. Like, I just do that. Like, I do it all the time.
Will Arnett
It's a love tap, y'all.
Jason Bateman
Well, it's pretty hard.
Will Arnett
We'll be right back.
Jason Bateman
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Will Arnett
Now, speaking of magic, the magic of movies, let's get to now you see me. So there was a lot of magic in that. Or illusions. Sorry, Will. Illusions. I would imagine you did a little bit of training for that. And have you retained any magical talent? Like, do you have a card? Do you have a go to card trick?
Jesse Eisenberg
I do. I do. And it's weird cause I have, like, muscle memory from it. We just finished doing the third movie like a month ago, and I just do the same one trick. I know. And for audiences who are paying attention, they'll realize that the greatest magician in the world knows one trick. Yeah, I just repurposed the one thing I learned. Yeah. In a different outfit.
Will Arnett
Someone was doing a magic thing at something I was at last week. And I just thought that, like. And he did a series of magical tricks as they do before they're done with their set. And by the time you get to like the third trick, you know your mind's gonna be blown. You know, you're gonna be like, oh, my God, how do you do that? And you just sort of like click into a gear of like, all right, let's see it. Here comes another sort of mind bending. Wow. And what I thought was, what would really be impressive at this point is to now tell us how you did it, because I know I'm going to be shocked. What would be really impressive is to see how you're doing this stuff, how you've trained yourself and taught yourself to Hide all these things that I didn't see, see. So when is magic going to change into that? Perhaps?
Sean Hayes
When are you going to enjoy life? When. When will you enjoy.
Jason Bateman
That's the magic. That's the magic.
Sean Hayes
My heart is breaking from you. I just had therapy, but when we're done, I'm going to call him and I'm going to bring you in. Jb, jump on with Terry, man. Oh, God, my heart.
Will Arnett
I want to see you, Terry. I want to wonder if you see the same Terry.
Sean Hayes
I really want to hug you right now. I feel just. Just. There's just. Just zero inner.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, you can't experience.
Will Arnett
I'll take it. I'll take a hug anytime or slap.
Jason Bateman
But. But, Jason, there is this show on tv. It was called, like, Breaking the Magician's Code or something like that. It's like magic's biggest secrets or something like that. And they did that. They revealed all those big, like, tricks and.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, they did.
Jason Bateman
How they did it I thought was fascinating.
Will Arnett
I want to see that. I'll look.
Sean Hayes
And then what are you left with?
Will Arnett
Then I'll just start reading ingredients on food packaging. You know, just knowing what's on the inside. There's tons of stuff. Read credits on movies.
Jesse Eisenberg
You're peek behind every cur.
Will Arnett
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
You know, when you. When you hear about these, like, when you hear how these magicians have done the trick, though, sometimes it's far more impressive than the trick because the kind of work that went into making something look seamless is, like, yeah. You know, shocking.
Jason Bateman
Yeah.
Will Arnett
Right, right, right, right. All right, talk to me about your. Your move into directing, why that happened and when it happened. Was it. Was it simply a result of you arriving at a place in your career where you could say, hey, I want to now direct, and you had the sort of industry capital in order to say that, or did it happen more organically than that?
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I just.
Will Arnett
In other words, had you wanted to do it for a long, long time and then.
Jesse Eisenberg
No, I've always just wanted to write plays. And then my last play, which was, like, 2019, just, like, wasn't received well. And I was, like, kind of really kind of heartbroken or whatever. Like, the play wasn't received well, and, I mean, the actors were amazing in it, but the play wasn't received well. And, like, so I just was like, I have to try something else. It just made me feel bad. And there was, like, scrutiny in a way that felt, like, mean spirited in a way that was like, oh, this industry can be. I mean, movies can also be reviews. But there's something about theater because it's such a small community. I don't know. It just. Anyway, so I just thought, let me try to. I'll do a movie next. Yeah, no, but I love writing plays more than anything. But I just thought maybe I should do a movie because. Yeah. And the thing you said about clout that, like, I did, I guess, feel not so much clout, but more like, oh, I feel like I've been around it enough to kind of have an understanding of what to do. I know that sounds so lame. Like, I didn't go to film school, but I just felt like I've been on sets that have been great, and I've been on sets that didn't work, and I've been on sets that were terrible sets but made great movies and vice versa. So I felt like, oh, no, I think I know what to do. If I can write something that is, like, tailored to my limited skill set, there's nothing wrong.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, you. Obviously, you're around it. You pick up on it, and it makes sense that you would. Would want. You know, want to sort of take agency and kind of do it yourself. And Sean. Sean last week is watching his chef open tuna cans for. And finally he was like, I'm gonna open a tuna can.
Jesse Eisenberg
That's not dissimilar.
Will Arnett
I can pinch the top on and make the water come out, or at.
Jason Bateman
Least let me try it.
Sean Hayes
I can eat the Hershey syrup out of the bottle. You know what I mean?
Jesse Eisenberg
Of course. And I think it took. And I think in Sean's case, it is cloud, you know, I think you feel you've worked up to this, and I think the industry recognizes that you can open up.
Jason Bateman
I didn't want to embarrass anybody.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, no. And it's good that you're finally in a place where you feel like, yes, I can do that, and, yes, I'm not going to get.
Sean Hayes
Really.
Jason Bateman
Thank you. Thank you.
Will Arnett
So wait, so you. You were. You. So you were feeling a little in your fifis about getting the. The bad reviews, basically, on the play, and then you thought you'd go for something ev. With even higher exposure, directing a film where you would. Opening yourself up to even more.
Jason Bateman
A broader audience.
Will Arnett
Yeah, I was very brave of you. You went the other way.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, thanks. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, but I. I guess I'm used to scrutiny. I mean, I'm used to scrutiny, and I, like, I care about it so much. I guess while it's happening and then literally not the next day. I just, you know, I don't want to be governed. Laura Linney said the greatest thing that I actually didn't hear her say, but my dad heard her on Charlie Rose talk about this 20 years ago. But they asked, or he asked her, do you read reviews? And she says, no, because I don't want somebody else to tell me how to do my job. And my dad was telling me this because I'm such like. I was like a, you know, self conscious person. He said, you know, your colleague who you were in that movie with, you know, this is how she views it. And it did really change my perspective.
Sean Hayes
That's interesting.
Will Arnett
Yeah, it is a really odd concept. I totally understand the aggregate of them. All right, so Rotten Tomatoes, where they put them all together and then there's sort of like a consensus. Does this work for the general public? I suppose, since you're making a public effort with your art. But specific, inter. Specific reviewers, their specific take on how it affected them as an individual. Well, we're not making things for one individual, making things for a whole public. And so it's not going to work for some people. And that doesn't mean that it's.
Sean Hayes
But I also saw like. Well, I. I think you're right about the aggregate thing. But. But at the same time, have there been films or pieces or music that have gotten bad reviews that you really like?
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, my God, yeah.
Sean Hayes
Can you think of one?
Will Arnett
Think of a film, a Terrence Malick film. The New World got. Got. Not great reviews. Interstellar, Chris Nolan's film. Not great review. Like.
Sean Hayes
Sean, what about you?
Will Arnett
I love those two films.
Jason Bateman
Yeah, Interstellar. I mean, I can't think of them, but I know, I know that I'll. Or I'll look on Rotten Tomatoes and.
Will Arnett
Conversely, the latest Batman film I thought was incredible, but.
Sean Hayes
Jesse, can you. Jesse, can you think of a film?
Jesse Eisenberg
I mostly have it, like, with theater. I mostly have it with theater where, like, I am enthralled by the, you know, by a piece. And then it. I look online, I'm like, how is this torn ap? This is the greatest thing I've ever seen. Because there's something about, like, and I don't know, maybe that even has to do with, like, different performances, offer different things. I don't know. But yeah, no, I do feel like.
Jason Bateman
But I'll go the other way too.
Sean Hayes
I felt the same way. Season three of Ned and Stacy. Cause there were. Sorry, go ahead, Sean.
Jason Bateman
I'll look at Rotten Tomatoes and something will get like, 90% or 95% and I'll watch it. I'm like, oh, good, they did the work for me. It's gonna be great. Right?
Jesse Eisenberg
Right.
Jason Bateman
And it's terrible.
Sean Hayes
I love Tenet. Nobody. A lot of Tenet ruined.
Will Arnett
I've seen it three times during COVID It got lost. Right.
Sean Hayes
I. I loved it, Sean. You didn't love it? I loved it.
Jason Bateman
Didn't get it. Yeah. I didn't understand.
Will Arnett
You didn't love it. One more thing about the directing thing. Have you. Have you. Have you ever gotten a really crazy direction from a director that's a b? How has getting weird direction from directing from directors affected the way in which you interface with actors? Also, you know, being an actor yourself, like, you've. You've worked some incredible directors, and I'm sure you've been able to cherry pick from. From the best of them and decided what not to do from the bad ones. But was there one in particular moment where you're like, I will never, ever do that to a poor actor or.
Jesse Eisenberg
Remember only my friend, like, Ruben Fleischer, who I think you guys know. Like, you know, he just. Oh, he did, like, the Zombieland movies. And then we just did. Now you see me together. I've worked with him a lot. And I just remember on, like, the first Zombieland, we were shooting in, like, what was supposed to be, like, a mansion. And so he was, like, several rooms away on the monitor, and I just heard this muffled scream. Now smile. And I was like. I could, like, understand that he was kind of talking to me, but also, I'm not, like, a smiler, you know? But also, like, it can't come. You can't. That's not the way you act. Like, oh, my face will smile, you know. Right, right. So that was just something. I was like, oh, yeah, I'll never do that. But I love Ruben. And now he's. Now he's great. But you guys have worked with Greg Mottola, I think, too.
Will Arnett
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
And he's just, like, my favorite. Like, I just. The way he handled this crew and the cast. And I had, like. Which happened to me maybe two or three times in my life, I had, like, kind of a panic attack during a scene, and I just shut down, and I just couldn't act. I don't know what happened. I just couldn't act. And so I. It was on this movie, Adventureland. I took him aside and I said, I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened. I think I had a panic attack, and I Thought he was gonna say, well, you know, we can't. I thought he was gonna, you know, respond annoyed. And he said, I don't understand how you're not having a panic attack every single. Like you're exposing yourself, you're bringing your emotions, you're trying to not think about your own vanity.
Will Arnett
He's such a sweet man.
Jesse Eisenberg
And I just remember thinking, that's the way I want to think about actors forever. Which is that like, they're already doing this difficult thing. They're trying to avoid thinking about their face being blown up on screen. They're avoiding thinking about the scrutiny that they're going to get. They're trying to live in the moment despite 100 strangers standing around them. And so that was a key for me. He's just the best, isn't he?
Will Arnett
Right. Which is why I don't understand. For the most part, we actors are pretty crazy. And I'm talking about myself like I'm fucking nuts and I'm filled with neuroses and insecurities. It is a helpful tool to. It's a helpful tool to call on when you're playing vulnerable characters. The central thing that we are doing, which is being up there in front of the camera, sort of is at odds with the inherent insecurities a lot of us have. So speak about that because again, getting back to, you know, you're so. You're so self effacing and honest about your own neuroses. How were you possibly drawn to this incredibly, you know, exposing profession?
Jesse Eisenberg
Because to me, to have like a prescribed way of behaving because of a character and lines, I feel so comfortable. Like the thing that makes me nervous is like you go into a party and what am I saying to this person? Do I remember this person? What did this person? And tell me, why do I have to be funny in this thing? I just want to go home. Like to have like a prescribed way. Like you're playing this character, they wear these pants that we put you in and you have to now go talk to that other person in this voice. Much greatest thing in the world.
Jason Bateman
Calming. Yeah, yeah.
Jesse Eisenberg
So calming.
Will Arnett
Now what about. I had the same. I had the same feeling. And then I started doing talk shows when I was a kid and it freaked me out because you have to be you. And there is no script and it's like.
Sean Hayes
And there is no you.
Will Arnett
Right, exactly. I mean, talk about panic attacks. I'm prone to panic as well. And talk shows for a long time were just like my kryptonite.
Jesse Eisenberg
It's the only thing that still freaks me out in our industry, like, literally nothing else but going on these talk shows at night freak me out, because I don't. I can't be funny telling a story for, like, the second time, you know?
Will Arnett
I know.
Jason Bateman
I don't know. I've seen you on talk shows, Jesse. You're always. You kill it every time. Every time.
Sean Hayes
I agree. I've seen you too.
Jesse Eisenberg
Because I. I try to not tell the story on the show that I told to the person before the day, because I know if I did that, it would just be weird and phony. You'd be trying to remember what made them laugh on the phone, kind of like a performance.
Will Arnett
But if you get a great host, like Kimmel or Conan or those guys, like, like, they'll. They'll go with you, right? You can go. You kind of freestyle, and they can just get into a conversation and you forget you're even in front of people.
Jason Bateman
But then. But you're doing this now. Then you're doing Graham Norton. Do you ever get burnt out by all of the chatter that you have to come up with?
Jesse Eisenberg
I don't. I don't. I feel like an adrenaline rush when I'm meeting people like you who are really funny, like. And him, I'm sure he's very funny. You know, you get the adrenaline rush of doing a thing that's fun.
Will Arnett
Right. And when you're promoting something that you love, like this great movie, a real pain, like, I'm sure it's just, like, you could talk all day about it, right?
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, I guess. Yeah. Cause I've done junkets that we all have for things that have not gone well, and. Yeah, that can be really uncomfortable. And you're kind of just parsing the euphoria.
Jason Bateman
Yes. Before we let you go, I just wanted to find, find, find you on social media if I wanted to find your social media.
Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, exactly.
Jason Bateman
Where do I.
Jesse Eisenberg
At the real. Yeah.
Will Arnett
Jesse, you're awesome. You're funny as. You're talented as hell. Nice as ever. Please.
Jesse Eisenberg
I love your show. Thank you so much for having me on.
Will Arnett
Say hi to Karen and Daniel and Graham. Yeah. Enjoy the rest of your. Thank you very, very much for doing this. Thank you so much.
Sean Hayes
Pleasure having you, dude.
Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, yeah. Thank you. Such an honor, too. Okay, well, have a great morning.
Will Arnett
Look forward to meeting you one day in person. Yeah, yeah, me too. All right, buddy. All right, enjoy.
Jesse Eisenberg
Bye. Bye.
Will Arnett
Now. There's a nice fella.
Sean Hayes
Love that guy, right?
Jason Bateman
He's really funny. I have no idea what to expect did you before this?
Will Arnett
No. Now I want to. I want to do a lot of in person with him. I want to find him at a party and corner.
Sean Hayes
Yeah, I know. I'm going to Cafe Clooney to have lunch with him next week.
Will Arnett
Hey, you don't. Nice pipes, Will listener. Will just removed his sleeves.
Jason Bateman
Jesus, Will, what part of your brain. What part of your brain came up with Ned and Stacy?
Sean Hayes
I don't know.
Will Arnett
Well, that's the place where Will and I first met.
Sean Hayes
That's where Jason and I first met on the set of.
Jason Bateman
What are you talking about? That was Deborah Messing shot.
Will Arnett
She was buddies. Yeah, correct. I was doing a guest shot on it, and Will was friends with Nadia Dejani. Dejani. And we all went out for drinks after the show, as one does. And there I was with Will at the bar, apparently getting hammered, because we were getting hammered.
Sean Hayes
And Jason had a very weak bladder because he kept going to the bathroom.
Will Arnett
Yeah.
Sean Hayes
And.
Will Arnett
And. And it was years later that I said to Will, after. After I had put down the.
Sean Hayes
The bottle, like seven years later.
Will Arnett
Yeah, I said to Will, I said, you know, and Will hadn't been drinking either for a long time. I said, boy, fuck, I wish you and I had really gotten together when we were drinking, you know, and we would have had so much fun. And he just looked at me and goes, oh, we did. And I had no recollection of partying with him that night.
Jason Bateman
Oh, that's so funny.
Sean Hayes
I love that Jesse.
Will Arnett
I mean, that. That. That Jesse Eisenberg, he's really left me in a. In a great, great mood. High quality guy, high talent guy. High intelligence guy. The guy, he's a writer. He's an actor. I guess you could call him by talented. No, sorry, I'm trying not to go. Try not to do the fucking shit on it. Like what? You do it. You do it. Let's hear it.
Jason Bateman
Okay.
Will Arnett
Yeah. Why is that? Why do you go into. That feels good.
Jason Bateman
It feels really good in my throat.
Will Arnett
Can we harmonize the. By talent?
Jason Bateman
Okay, ready? Ready? Go. One, two, three.
Will Arnett
No, someone's got to go high. Someone's got to go low. Everyone's got to go middle.
Jason Bateman
I'll go middle.
Will Arnett
I'll go middle, you go high, and Will go low.
Jason Bateman
Ready? Ready? Go.
Sean Hayes
Sean, you start, okay?
Jason Bateman
No, you got to start at the base.
Jesse Eisenberg
Bye.
Sean Hayes
Smart.
Jesse Eisenberg
Smart less.
Sean Hayes
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Jesse Eisenberg
Less.
Will Arnett
Hello, friends. Jason here we are so excited that Smartless has officially joined the SiriusXM family. We can't wait to announce new surprise guests who we know that you'll love. And if you want to be the first to hear new episodes ad free and a whole week early, subscribe to SiriusXM podcasts plus on Apple podcast to start your free trial today.
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Will Arnett
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Jason Bateman
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Will Arnett
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Jason Bateman
Right, like Nike, Brooks, Timberland, and more. Oh yeah, did we mention they also happen to be the perfect price? Find a shoe for every you at your DSW store and dsw.com.
Episode Summary: SmartLess – Featuring Jesse Eisenberg
Episode Title: Jesse Eisenberg
Release Date: January 27, 2025
Hosts: Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Will Arnett
In this engaging episode of "SmartLess," hosts Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and Will Arnett welcome actor, writer, and director Jesse Eisenberg. The conversation delves deep into Jesse's multifaceted career, his perspectives on social media, his experiences in the entertainment industry, and his personal insights on creativity and resilience.
The episode opens with the hosts introducing Jesse Eisenberg, highlighting his extensive work in film, television, and theater. They commend his versatility and accomplishments, setting the stage for an in-depth discussion.
Notable Quote:
Jesse recounts his early foray into acting with his role in "Roger Dodger" at the age of 18, which was pivotal in launching his career. He shares a humorous yet insightful story about writing a script about Woody Allen at 16, which led to a cease and desist letter from Allen's lawyers.
Notable Quote:
Despite initial setbacks with his plays being canceled, Jesse discusses his passion for writing and his eventual transition into directing. He reflects on the differences between playwriting and screenwriting, emphasizing the unique challenges each medium presents.
Notable Quote:
Jesse shares his academic journey, explaining his studies in anthropology influenced by his wife's background. He differentiates anthropology from sociology, highlighting its focus on cultural studies.
Notable Quote:
A significant portion of the discussion centers around Jesse's critical views on social media. He articulates his discomfort with the pervasive nature of platforms like Instagram, arguing that they often lead to isolation and reinforce societal divisions.
Notable Quote:
Jesse talks about his interactions with various directors, praising those who create supportive environments. He shares a particularly challenging experience with Bob Weinstein during the production of "Cursed With," highlighting the difficulties actors can face with overbearing producers.
Notable Quote:
The conversation delves into personal challenges Jesse has faced, including panic attacks during scenes. He emphasizes the importance of compassionate directors who understand and support actors through such moments.
Notable Quote:
Jesse reflects on the dichotomy between his personal satisfaction with his work and external reviews. He discusses the subjective nature of criticism and how it influences his approach to future projects.
Notable Quote:
In the concluding segment, Jesse shares his thoughts on creativity and resilience in the entertainment industry. The hosts express their admiration for his candidness and depth, wrapping up the episode on a positive and reflective note.
Notable Quote:
Resilience in Creativity: Jesse emphasizes the importance of perseverance and adaptability in the face of setbacks within the creative industries.
Critique of Social Media: His critical stance on social media highlights concerns about its impact on genuine human interactions and societal cohesion.
Supportive Collaboration: Jesse's experiences underscore the value of compassionate and understanding collaborations in bringing out the best in creative endeavors.
This episode provides listeners with a comprehensive look into Jesse Eisenberg's professional journey and personal philosophies. His insights offer both inspiration and critical reflection on contemporary issues in the entertainment landscape.