"Laura Dern"

Summary

SmartLess Podcast Summary

Episode: “Laura Dern”

Hosts: Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Will Arnett
Guest: Laura Dern
Date: December 8, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode features acclaimed actress Laura Dern, who joins Jason, Sean, and Will for a wide-ranging, funny, and intimate conversation. Topics span from parenthood and "nepo babies," to Dern's legendary Hollywood legacy, her career-defining moments, and behind-the-scenes stories from projects like Jurassic Park, Blue Velvet, and the upcoming film Is This Thing On? With a blend of genuine admiration and characteristic SmartLess banter, the group explores the emotional core of acting, the meaning of legacy, and what it’s like to be part of entertainment history.

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Key Segments and Highlights

1. Warm-Up and Parenthood Jokes

[02:00 – 07:45]

• The hosts begin with laughter on their current states, with recurring jokes about Sean’s chapstick being applied by “Scotty.”
• Discussion turns humorous about the realities and energy needed for parenting as Sean debates (then rules out) the idea of adoption at his age.
• Sean’s memorable one-liner:

  “I'd rather regret not having them than have them and regret it later.” – Sean Hayes [06:34]

• Will and Jason assure Sean he’d be a great dad (if only he could operate a stroller).

2. Introducing Laura Dern

[07:45 – 09:48]

• Will introduces Laura with accolades and a rundown of her major works, including his own honor acting alongside her.
• Playful jokes about Laura’s “fireplace reflection” on Zoom set the cozy tone for her entrance:

  "Has every guest told you the hardest acting job is staying quiet while you’re hysterical?" – Laura Dern [09:01]

3. Family, Legacy & “Nepo Babies”

[09:48 – 21:28]

• Laura shares about growing up as the daughter of Bruce Dern and Diane Ladd. She witnessed directors like Scorsese and Hitchcock working with her parents from a young age.
• Fond memories of being a child extra for Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, eating 16 ice cream cones for Marty Scorsese.

  “That kid’s gonna be an actress.” – Martin Scorsese, as recounted by Laura Dern [15:39]

• Reflections on “nepo babies” across industries—acting, sports (Peyton/Eli Manning)—and the double standard about family legacies in Hollywood:

  “Most professions revere legacy families… In our business it’s public, so it’s an easy target.” – Laura Dern [19:33] “If you don’t have the goods, who cares if you’re a nepo baby?” – Sean Hayes [21:09]

• Laughter imagining Sean and Scotty adopting and naming their child “Nepo.”

4. Choosing Roles and Project Insights

[21:54 – 29:33]

• Laura describes how, while she’s been lucky to be “chosen,” her decision-making is founded on connection to roles, directors, and a longing to work with master filmmakers.
• Confusion with Laura Linney (Ozark co-star) is a running gag; both Lauras report being recognized for each other's work.
• Will and Laura reminisce about being the first mother-daughter Oscar nominees for the same film, Rambling Rose.
• Laura recalls filming Smooth Talk at age 15—the emotional vulnerability required, and insights about distinguishing between personal feelings and character.

5. Acting as Vulnerability and Truth

[29:33 – 33:23]

• The group delves into the emotional resonance of acting and storytelling for collective connection:

  “Empathy is the badass superpower... It’s radical and hardcore and baller. I felt like a kid who just found a sport.” – Laura Dern [30:05] “We all just want to connect with each other and have these shared experiences... It gives us perspective.” – Will Arnett [31:02]

• Discussion of the “magic” of movies—the agreement between actors and audience to treat fiction as emotionally real.

6. Working with David Lynch and Career Crossroads

[40:24 – 44:28]

• Laura recounts first meeting David Lynch, auditioning for Blue Velvet, and the fateful decision to drop out of college for the role (her school warned her it was a “radical mistake”).

  “This is my college. This will be... the greatest opportunity.” – Laura Dern [43:37]

7. Jurassic Park and On-Set Stories

[35:35 – 39:41]

• Recounts the “Steven Spielberg with a megaphone” story: to cue the actors’ reactions for unseen dinosaurs, Spielberg shouted “roar!” into a megaphone.

  “We all lost it. This group of actors looked at each other like, ‘This is a disaster.’” – Laura Dern [37:53]

• Will notes Laura’s iconic place in pop culture as “the person with the dinosaur head in her face.”

8. Recent Projects & On-Set Friendship

[47:53 – 56:41]

• The cast shares stories from Is This Thing On?, praising each other’s performances and dedication. Laura discusses preparing to play an Olympic volleyball player.

  “I pride myself sometimes on throwing myself into things... I had to get up two hours before and train.” – Laura Dern [49:16]

• Will describes his nerves acting opposite Laura, calling it “playing tennis with a great” and how their partnership and vulnerability deepened their performances.

9. Starstruck Moments and Influence

[58:22 – 61:41]

• Laura discusses being the most “starstruck” by film actors/directors and musicians, even after a lifetime in Hollywood.
• Anecdote about inheriting her mother’s Battle of the Network Stars award and the hosts’ longing for the revival of classic TV show competitions.

10. Closing Banter and Future Plans

[62:00 – 65:13]

• Playful jokes about sequels to their movie (“Is This Thing Still On?”) and movie trailer cliches.
• Emotional farewells with mutual declarations of love and friendship.
• Jason, Will, and Sean recap their admiration for Laura’s pedigree, skill, and enduring warmth.

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Notable Quotes

• Laura Dern on Empathy in Acting:

  “Empathy is this badass superpower… It’s radical and hardcore and baller.” [30:05]

• Will Arnett on Acting's Human Connection:

  “We all just want to connect with each other and have these shared experiences… It inspires us, gives us perspective...” [31:02]

• Laura Dern recounting Scorsese’s comment:

  “That kid’s gonna be an actress.” [15:39]

• Sean Hayes on Regret:

  “I'd rather regret not having them than have them and regret it later.” [06:34]

• Laura Dern on Making Choices:

  “I was so young that it was only later that any of that occurred to me, or I probably never would have done it.” [18:38]

• Laura Dern on Spielberg's Dinosaur Cue:

  “Steven takes a megaphone and goes, 'roar, roar.’ We all lost it. … ‘This is a disaster.’” [37:53]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Parenthood discussion: 02:00 – 07:45
• Laura Dern introduction: 07:45 – 09:48
• Legacy & Nepo babies: 09:48 – 21:28
• Choosing roles: 21:54 – 29:33
• Acting/vulnerability: 29:33 – 33:23
• David Lynch & crossroads: 40:24 – 44:28
• Jurassic Park set story: 35:35 – 39:41
• Recent projects/Is This Thing On?: 47:53 – 56:41
• Starstruck experiences: 58:22 – 61:41
• Closing banter: 62:00 – End

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Tone and Style

The episode is rich with humor, camaraderie, and deep respect. The group oscillates between irreverent riffs and sincere, vulnerable exchanges that highlight Laura Dern’s singular place in the industry and the love the hosts have for their craft and one another.

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For New Listeners

Even if you haven’t listened, you’ll leave this summary understanding:

• The chemistry and history among the hosts and guest
• The major themes of legacy, vulnerability, acting as connection, and “nepo babies”
• Laura Dern’s insight, humility, and sense of humor
• Behind-the-scenes snippets from legendary Hollywood moments and new projects
• Why this episode captures the best of what SmartLess offers: thoughtful dialogue, big laughs, and genuine human connection

Transcript

[Will Arnett]

I just want to entertain people and make a living. From Focus Features they had a dream.

[Laura Dern]

I want to sing. I want to dance. I want to garden.

[Sean Hayes]

I want a cat.

[Will Arnett]

All they needed was each other. We used to call ourselves Lightning and Thunder.

[Sean Hayes]

A Neil diamond experience.

[Will Arnett]

This Christmas Based on a true story you've ever had.

[Sean Hayes]

A shop pal.

[Will Arnett]

This is it. Hugh Jackman Kate Hudson. It's good. So good.

Song sung blue rated PG13. May be inappropriate for children under 13. Only in theaters this Christmas.

[Sean Hayes]

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[Jason Bateman]

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Hey, G. Jason Bateman here doing a cold open for Smartless. I'm all by myself. I don't have the other two guys. So this is the horrifying look into what this podcast would be without Sean Hayes and Will Arnett. Just me talking gaps. No fun, no humor, nothing interesting. Welcome to Smartlist.

[Will Arnett]

Smart Less.

Sm. Lars.

Smart Lars.

[Jason Bateman]

All right, so listener, we've got Will beaming in from Bozeman, Montana. We've got Sean P. Hayes there in downtown Hollywood. Oh, there it is. Scotty is applying chapstick onto Sean's lips because that's the role they like to play.

[Will Arnett]

Wow, that just happened.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah, well, Jason threatened that he do it and I made him do it.

[Will Arnett]

That was.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Does.

[Jason Bateman]

Does Scotty ever call from the restroom? I'm done. Sean.

Wipey.

[Will Arnett]

Okay.

[Sean Hayes]

No, no, Willie, don't you.

[Will Arnett]

Not in the wild. Not in the wild.

[Jason Bateman]

Willie, don't. Will, don't you miss the days. Don't you miss the days of wiping the bums and changing the diaper and the whole like. Yeah, shushing them.

[Sean Hayes]

And then what about doing that to your kids?

[Will Arnett]

Oh.

I Do miss it. I just. We just sort of. Especially now that my little guy is. Is five. Yeah. He just seems like such a big boy now.

[Jason Bateman]

Doing it a little bit.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah. But he. He just seems like such a big boy now.

[Sean Hayes]

When is he six? What's it. When is his birthday?

[Will Arnett]

In May.

[Sean Hayes]

Oh, yeah.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah.

[Sean Hayes]

How about that?

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. Now, Sean. And you know, we can cut this. And this is getting too personal, or.

[Will Arnett]

We can cut this in. We can get this into the midd. Another episode. Drop it in.

[Jason Bateman]

Have you and Scotty ever had a serious conversation about maybe adopting?

[Sean Hayes]

You know, it's funny you say that. I. Yes, but no. Like, I. It's unfortunate that now, right now at this age is the time I'm like, oh, boy, I. I could really have a kid. I think it'd be really fun to be a dad. But unfortunately it's too. It feels like it's too late because of the energy that it requires and all that.

[Will Arnett]

Energy. Yes.

[Sean Hayes]

And so I feel like my brain.

[Jason Bateman]

That's what a staff is for, Sean. I can see you so staffed up. Couldn't you Will like three night nurses, four nannies.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah, but then what? But then I would feel bad about the kid because the kid wouldn't like, I'd have to take it to Disneyland. I'd be too tired.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah, but you'd be like, you know, like the old millionaire, distant, unavailable dad in the wheelchair barking orders.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

From the.

[Sean Hayes]

No, but I mean. You know what I mean? Like, my brain is there, but like, I.

[Will Arnett]

It's.

[Sean Hayes]

My brain came too late.

[Jason Bateman]

I think you'd be great no matter what.

[Will Arnett]

Me too. Me too. I know what would happen is it would happen and you would be absolutely obsessed, Sean. In the best way.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

And just.

[Jason Bateman]

He's the new 30.

[Will Arnett]

Oh, no. What are you going to do? Your headphones are plugged in. You took your sweater off.

[Sean Hayes]

I know. I can't unplug the fucking. I took my sweater off over my headphones and I'm just the guy who.

[Jason Bateman]

Tries to take his sweater off in the car when he's driving.

[Will Arnett]

You know what, jb? I think it's better he didn't have a kid.

[Sean Hayes]

You know, I just saw that.

I need a parent.

[Jason Bateman]

You imagine him trying to collapse a stroller.

[Will Arnett]

Oh, my God. By the way.

[Jason Bateman]

Trying to get it in the trunk.

[Will Arnett]

Nothing. Nothing tests your intellect more than trying to figure out how to collapse one of those. Or.

[Jason Bateman]

Or by putting in a car seat and trying to try to strap in the. The. The. The. The seat belt thing behind it. And into the. And the. The anchors.

[Will Arnett]

I'm still. I'm still in the booster phase. I'm out of the full car seat, but I am still in the booster phase. Have sweaty moments of trying to find the thing, the hook underneath, and I'm like, just one second, one second. And then I'm God.

[Sean Hayes]

But no, but a lot of parents are really bad marketers at it because, like, the second the baby goes crazy and it's having a tantrum and it's in its arms, they look over their shoulder and they mouth to you.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

They go, don't have kids.

[Jason Bateman]

Right. I know.

[Sean Hayes]

Do you know what I mean? And you're just like, well, now I don't want to. Because you just. I just saw. Witness that.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah, but those are just the moments, you know?

[Will Arnett]

What was the line, Sean, that you used to always use? You'd say, like, I'd have kids.

[Sean Hayes]

I'd rather regret not having them than have them and regret it later.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah, it's a great line.

[Jason Bateman]

It's a great to be on a greeting card.

[Will Arnett]

I mean, it's just. It's just. It's abstract, but it's great.

[Jason Bateman]

Warming.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah.

[Sean Hayes]

I don't know.

[Jason Bateman]

Well, listen, you got Ricky, you know.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah.

[Jason Bateman]

Talk back. He just barks every once in a while.

[Sean Hayes]

Barely.

[Will Arnett]

I saw jb. Sean, I haven't seen you in forever.

[Sean Hayes]

I know.

[Will Arnett]

I haven't seen you in forever.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah, I saw Sweet Willie last night.

[Sean Hayes]

Oh, where?

[Will Arnett]

At this event.

[Jason Bateman]

Some fancy dancy thing.

[Sean Hayes]

Oh, the governor's thing. That's it. I didn't know that was last night.

[Will Arnett]

That was last night. And I said to. I actually said in my thing. I said a few words at the start. And I said, oh, yeah, you mentioned the podcast. And I said, and Jason is actually here today, and if you see him, just go up and touch him, hug him. He loves strangers.

[Sean Hayes]

It's like a receiving line.

[Jason Bateman]

Wait, so did you know I was going to be there, or were you just. Did you improvise that?

[Will Arnett]

I just improvised that. Yeah. Just. Yeah, just in the moment.

[Jason Bateman]

This guy's got skills. He's not afraid of a microphone in a spotlight.

[Will Arnett]

It was a crazy room, and I wanted to make sure to be just kind of respectful. And it was such a great night.

[Sean Hayes]

How was it? Was it long and. And boring or kind of fun?

[Will Arnett]

It was pretty sure. Yeah.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

So.

[Sean Hayes]

All right. Well, there it is. There it is.

[Will Arnett]

Tell you who's not short.

[Jason Bateman]

Oh, we got a tall guest.

[Will Arnett]

And I will say that this. She is an acclaimed actress, producer, and filmmaker known for versatility, emotional, intelligent performances across film and television. Born in la, both her parents are acclaimed actors themselves. She started acting at a young age. She has been in some of my favorite movies of all time and I'm also love and I've had the honor of being in a movie with her. She, we saw her in Blue Velvet Wild at Heart. She rambled her first academy award nomination. She won an Academy.

[Jason Bateman]

Look at this, huh? Look at the seamless.

[Will Arnett]

I was gonna say she's our friend. Laura Dern.

[Jason Bateman]

Oh my God.

[Sean Hayes]

Exciting.

[Jason Bateman]

I can't wait to drill you about just the tortures of working with Will Arnett's least favorite part.

[Will Arnett]

First of all, first of all. No, no, hang on before we get into her least favorite part because she has a lot of least favorite parts. I will say Laura, I love. I can see in the reflection of your window the fire, the fire going.

[Laura Dern]

I mean guys, and it wasn't even planned.

[Sean Hayes]

This is gonna be the coziest episode ever.

[Laura Dern]

It's so cozy. But by the way, has every single guest ever told you that the hardest acting job of their life is staying quiet while you're hysterical? And all I want to talk about is Sean and Scotty as parents. What? That's my dream. Come here.

[Jason Bateman]

This is your time. This is your turn. Go get him. Talk him into baby Laura. Give him a good pitch because you've got a great kid or two.

[Will Arnett]

Two great kids. And she's such a great mom.

[Jason Bateman]

Tell Sean how great he'd be. And age is. Age is not a factor.

[Sean Hayes]

I don't know.

[Laura Dern]

It's not a factor. And I liked the Citizen Kane imagery. I sort of like in the wheelchair of Sean. Of Sean rolling into parents preschooler.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah, they're only going to be 10 years old before they have to wipe me.

[Will Arnett]

I like the idea of you, Sean, of you, you, Scotty and your child eating at one end of a huge like 30 person table. Yeah, right. With a butler coming in.

[Jason Bateman]

Finish her homework.

[Laura Dern]

Oh, the three of you @ Dupars I'm just.

[Sean Hayes]

So. Oh my God.

[Laura Dern]

Dupars. I'm so.

[Sean Hayes]

Happy. Wait, so for Tracy who may not know. I think she knows. Will and Laura star in the upcoming Is this thing on.

[Jason Bateman]

Direction. And Sean Hayes co.

[Will Arnett]

Stars. And Sean Hayes and Scotty Scott. Scott Eisnogle as.

[Sean Hayes]

Well. That's correct. We're both in it as.

[Laura Dern]

Well. Incredible in this.

[Sean Hayes]

Movie. He's.

[Laura Dern]

Great. I will talk about Sean and Will as well but I have to start with.

[Sean Hayes]

Scotty.

[Will Arnett]

Scotty. Scotty has one of my favorite Lines in the movie, Laura, in that scene where all of us are in that scene and they say, I want to raise a toast to somebody who's done a great thing. And you're just going to go, thank.

[Sean Hayes]

You.

All right. Exactly. Exactly. Oh, my.

[Jason Bateman]

Gosh. Where was that great apartment? That was an awesome.

[Sean Hayes]

Apartment. Oh, my.

[Laura Dern]

God. That was Dumbo.

[Will Arnett]

Right? That was in Dumbo. That was. Yeah, that was Bradley and Andrew Day's apartment. Their characters. It was a great.

[Laura Dern]

Apartment.

[Will Arnett]

Amazing.

[Sean Hayes]

It. Well, they turned it into a great.

[Will Arnett]

Apartment. Oh.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. Laura, I just saw you in another great movie yesterday. J.

[Will Arnett]

Kelly. J. Kelly.

[Sean Hayes]

Nice. Nice going. Oh, I want to.

[Laura Dern]

See. Thank.

[Sean Hayes]

You. I.

[Will Arnett]

Want. This is what I want to.

[Jason Bateman]

See. She doesn't really waste her. She doesn't waste her time in bad stuff.

[Will Arnett]

Guys. No, I.

[Jason Bateman]

Know. When's the last time you saw her in a bad.

[Will Arnett]

Project? You.

[Jason Bateman]

Can'T. You can't challenge.

[Will Arnett]

You. It doesn't.

[Laura Dern]

Exist. Okay. If you want it to be a.

[Sean Hayes]

Challenge. So, Laura, how do you pick projects? Is it. Is it script director? Is there an order or, like, what speaks to you as the role and you don't care about the other stuff or how do you.

[Laura Dern]

Pick? I guess first I ask if any of you are in.

[Jason Bateman]

It.

[Laura Dern]

Sure. And then if I'm three out.

[Will Arnett]

Of three on the last one, by.

[Laura Dern]

The way, three out of three. Because. And it always interests me. It's people that come up to me that know specific films that I'm in that they love, have seen me over the years, mention a few of the films they're grateful for, and then also tell me how much they love me and Ozark, and I'm like, is it because my name is Laura? Confusing this? Is it just the Laura connection? But Laura Linney will also tell you.

[Jason Bateman]

This. Ah, that you guys get stopped for each.

[Laura Dern]

Other. Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah.

[Laura Dern]

Really. So I kind of. So we've worked together as.

[Will Arnett]

Well. I could see the people make that brain fart, and they're like, I loved you in Ozark with Justin.

[Laura Dern]

Bateman.

[Jason Bateman]

Exactly. That covers all the.

[Will Arnett]

Bases. Yeah.

Laura, you started. Listen, we're getting into choosing rules. Well, first of all, you can answer Sean's.

[Sean Hayes]

Question. What is your criteria? Is there a.

[Laura Dern]

Process? Yeah, I would say that I. Could you choose? Well, thank you. I 1 have gotten very blessed to be chosen. So I don't know that I think it's more about luck than the choosing. And if we are lucky and as our careers evolve, we maybe get to do some of the choosing. But when I was a kid and getting to watch my parents work with incredible filmmakers. I didn't know what was happening. I was just a 6, 7 year old kid on set.

I fell in love with their relationship with filmmakers and what that felt like and looked like to see people understand or have an instinct about my parents in a way that I felt I knew them intimately, things that others didn't know about them. And I thought, man, this is such a crazy dynamic that there are these people that get them in a way they may not even have caught up to in themselves. So I sort of fell in love with that relationship before I even understood what acting was like. And so I always dreamt of getting to work with master filmmakers. And, you know, I got lucky at a young age that extraordinary directors, you know, hired.

[Will Arnett]

Me. But did you. Do you remember filmmakers being around the house? Like, filmmakers that we know filmmaker, like, do you remember.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Them?

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I remember when I was six, my summer vacation that became the year that I then went to my parents and said I wanted to start studying acting and became kind of obsessed with the idea of it, which seems so absurd now, but I just knew, I guess, you know, there are things, you know, about that you loved. But my mom was doing Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore with Martin Scorsese, and my dad was doing a film family Plot with Alfred Hitchcock. And I went back and forth between those two.

[Sean Hayes]

Sets. So for my sister, who might not know, your dad is Bruce Dern and your mom is Diane Ladd, who, I'm sorry, just recently passed and so sorry. But yes, she was.

[Will Arnett]

Fantastic.

[Laura Dern]

Same. Thank you.

So, yeah, yeah, it was an amazing thing. Just like watching these.

You know, mind blowing directors at work with them and then, you know. Yeah. As a kid, Hal Ashby was my dad's neighbor as well as a colleague and became such a hero director to me and a lot of.

[Will Arnett]

Directors. Did you do something? And Alison doesn't live here.

[Laura Dern]

Anymore. I was an extra. Yeah, I ate an ice cream cone and I had to. I think they did like 16 takes or something. So I had to eat 16 ice cream cones. And Marty said to my mom.

[Will Arnett]

Sean, they're not still casting, by the.

[Laura Dern]

Way. Yeah, yeah.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. Sean's on, excited. He's been paid for licking.

[Laura Dern]

Before.

Oh, my God. I thought it was gonna be.

[Sean Hayes]

A leader sometimes for.

[Laura Dern]

Free.

But he had sort of commented in front of me to my mom, like, oh my God, she just ate 16 ice cream cones and she didn't throw up. Like, that kid's gonna be an actress. That's where I went, oh, Someone complimented.

[Jason Bateman]

Me. Do you have any recall at all about what kind of person Alfred Hitchcock.

[Laura Dern]

Was? Yeah, guys, the craziest thing I remember, you know, because there's all kinds of stories, you know, reputationally about him. But I remember. All I know is I was super little and a bit intimidated anyway, whenever I went on set, I always thought I was in the way and kind of shy. And he had props. Make a mini director's chair that he put next to him and let me sit there with.

[Jason Bateman]

Him. No way. Somebody took a picture of.

[Laura Dern]

That. You know what? I have one photo with them on set, but not in the director's chair, which is.

[Sean Hayes]

Crazy. Just sitting next to.

[Laura Dern]

Him. And I didn't know. All I knew was, you know, some big, jolly man who.

[Sean Hayes]

Would.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. Like, laugh hysterically at my dad. He thought my dad was so funny. And I just loved that because at the time, people would come up to me telling me what a bad guy my dad was. Cause he'd killed John Wayne and for your sister. My dad was, I think, the only person to successfully kill John Wayne in a movie. So he was not very well liked at the time, but loved for being a bad guy in Westerns. But also, as a kid, you're sort of intimidated by people talking about, like, oh, man, do I love to hate you. I was like, oh, okay. Enjoy your time at Disneyland. Sean Hayes is with his.

[Will Arnett]

Child.

No, he was too.

[Laura Dern]

Tired. He has the man in the.

[Sean Hayes]

Wheelchair. Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

Exactly. Vroom.

[Jason Bateman]

Vroom. Did you ever feel any sort of. Or did you start too early to feel any sort of intellectual pressure.

To work as consistently as your parents had? Like, that's. That's a. Those are real tall bars to try to match, jump over, live up to. I mean, you've made it. You've done.

[Laura Dern]

It. But, like, this is such a question for you as well. And I will say one thing I so love every time I get to see Jason because of our shared friends is I find you and we find a corner, and then we just go and share. Growing up amidst family at young ages, working amidst other family members, did.

[Will Arnett]

You guys ever cross paths when you were young? Did you guys have Hollywood friends in.

[Jason Bateman]

Common? I don't think so. No. No. Laura was, you know, the whole stratosphere. Higher than.

[Will Arnett]

That. Don't you.

[Laura Dern]

Dare. The stratosphere? The stratosphere to me, was yours. I.

[Jason Bateman]

Kept. But living up to what? Your parents are so immensely famous your entire life.

Were you even conscious that you were setting yourself up to, like, how could I ever live up to that? Or that. That never got. Got in your way, did.

[Laura Dern]

It? No. I feel like I was so young that it was only later that any of that occurred to me, or I probably never would have done.

[Jason Bateman]

It. But, but, but, but before you said for any. Any kids out there that. That do struggle with that, like, thank God you didn't let it get in your way, because it shouldn't, because it is. You are a completely individual person, separate from your parents. You know, even though you may want to go into the same occupation as them, whether it's acting or not, like, it's completely natural that a kid would want to go down the same lane they've watched and admired. Because your parents are your first heroes. And so why wouldn't you want to go and do the same thing that they were doing? And it doesn't matter whether you end up doing the same accomplishments that they do. It's just. I don't know. I just think. I think it a bad.

[Laura Dern]

Guy. Yeah. And most professions we know only kind of revere legacy families or going into the family business. Your butcher, a doctor you go to. By the way, knowing your kids, they're just hilarious, brilliant people. And I'm just can't wait for them to write and direct and act if they choose it, because it's innate in them. And Will and I had an amazing experience because working on our movie, which I will get into and divulge all these beautiful things about Will. Sorry, guys. I'm gonna be super reverent about Will. It's gonna be a bummer for you.

[Jason Bateman]

Both. You know, we like him, too.

[Laura Dern]

But we also got to work with Peyton Manning. And when Peyton and I had a scene together, and somehow this subject of, quote, Nepo babies came up, and he's like, yeah, I'm a Nepo baby. And I thought, oh, right. No one ever talks about, you know, legacy. Like, the great NFL family of all time say, like, Peyton Manning shouldn't have done it. Eli Manning should have done something.

[Jason Bateman]

Else. Yeah.

[Laura Dern]

Right. It's so.

[Will Arnett]

Crazy. And here's the other thing. If people didn't want it, whatever, then they wouldn't have opportunity. That's just the way that it works. We know how it works. It all boils down to commerce anyway, right? In any business, if the guy goes. If he's like, my dad was a doctor and I decided to become a doctor, and he was a shit doctor, he wouldn't have any patients. Like, that's just the way it goes. And it's the same. It's the same in our business. So I do. But it's an easy target, as you see, because it's so. It's so public. So it's just, you.

[Sean Hayes]

Know. Yeah, but if you. Like you said, if you don't have the goods, if you're a Nepo baby, you don't have the goods. It doesn't. Who care. Like you don't know.

[Will Arnett]

What. Sean, I just realized that's what you and Scotty should have. You should have a Nepo baby.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah.

[Will Arnett]

Yes. Adopt a Nepo.

[Laura Dern]

Baby. Name the baby.

[Sean Hayes]

Nepo. That would be amazing.

[Laura Dern]

Great. A.

[Sean Hayes]

Great.

Take him to the pediatrics. He's like, Nepo. Nepo baby. Nepo baby.

[Will Arnett]

Hayes. This is our son.

[Jason Bateman]

Nepo.

[Will Arnett]

Nepo. I snuggle and get him in a show right away. Get him into a show in his own show, a reality.

[Sean Hayes]

Show. Finding.

[Jason Bateman]

Nepo. Sure.

And we will be right.

[Sean Hayes]

Back.

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[Sean Hayes]

Zero. And scene. This has been another episode of Amazon's five Star Theater. Whatever you're looking for this holiday Find the perfect gift on Amazon.

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And now back to the.

[Will Arnett]

Show.

Laura, what was the first. What was the first job where you were you. Well, first of all, I want to do, I do want to say, talking about the parents stuff. Jb, I don't know if you know this, when you and your mom were the first time ever.

Mother, daughter, child, parent were nominated both academy award nominations for Rambling Rose, a film that I adore. You're incredible in that movie, Laura, and I'm going to embarrass you because I just love you so.

[Sean Hayes]

Much. I didn't know that both of you got nominated the same.

[Will Arnett]

Year. Same.

[Sean Hayes]

Movie. Yeah, the same movie. Yeah.

[Laura Dern]

Wow.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. In the same.

[Laura Dern]

Category. No, separate.

[Jason Bateman]

Categories. One was supporting, one was.

[Sean Hayes]

Lead. Wow, that's.

[Will Arnett]

Wild. Isn't that.

[Sean Hayes]

Incredible? Yeah, yeah. And did you go, did you go.

[Laura Dern]

Carpool? We went.

[Sean Hayes]

Together. Like.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. With my grandma was so sweet. It was.

[Jason Bateman]

Amazing. Three.

[Will Arnett]

Generations.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. It was crazy. It was so.

[Will Arnett]

Beautiful. So, so crazy. What was. Laura, what was the first thing that you did where you felt like.

Like the first role that you had that you did and you were like, I got it. Like, not, not I got it. But you felt really good. Like you feel really connected to it. Like the first sort of meaty thing that you're like, okay, like, this is, this is really what I want to do and it feels good. And did you have one of.

[Laura Dern]

Those? Yeah, maybe this movie. Smooth talk. It was probably my first lead and so I had no.

Time to not find devotion. You know, like it was. We made it for under $2 million. I was in every scene. It was. There's a really radical film with myself and Treat Williams. There's a very deeply troubling and very complicated to shoot. Half hour long kind of coaxing of this young girl toward a sexual assault based on a Joyce Carol Oates story. And you know, radical amounts of dialogue and you know, playing a character.

And I was 15 when we made it. Who's sort of discovering her sexuality a bit before I knew so many aspects of self. I didn't know myself in that way so completely. And.

I had to, yeah, I had to be.

So emotionally vulnerable and still somehow learn how to take care of myself. And yeah, that was the first time I think I had to be a grown.

[Jason Bateman]

Up. And after the film was done or after the. After that particularly hard day when you did a particularly hard scene, when did you feel like, wow, I just kind of slayed that dragon and I'm on the other side of.

[Laura Dern]

It. I just went straight to like cynical, like jaded divorcee, 47 year old smoker. I just was like, I've done the, you know, now I get to just be a dame. No, not.

[Jason Bateman]

Really. But when did you. But did you feel that you were on the other side of it at the end of the movie or at the end of that day or once it came out and it got.

[Laura Dern]

Received? You know what I think the coolest thing was? I remember actually calling home and calling my mom after just a day of crying all day and thinking, maybe this isn't the most fun job. Maybe this isn't. Like I didn't understand and all these feelings and where to put them. And I was blessed to have parents I could talk to about that and get some distance from things and learn how to. Even though it's emotional and you can kind of crack open all these spaces you don't have to like live in can be healing and a job toward healing and not something that kind of rips you apart in some weird.

[Jason Bateman]

Way. But you'd felt that you'd pulled it off. Yeah, the tears were believable and all.

[Laura Dern]

That. Yeah, yeah. I think I felt a little scared by it because it wasn't intentional. I wasn't trying to be a method actor. I was a kid who just had a day of crying all day and my body Was, like, shaking and unhappy, like when you've cried all day. And so I think just the getting to the place where at the end of that day, I learned kind of what was me and what was this other play space of discovery and I think the deepest joy, which happened around that time and also on Blue Velvet, which were like a year and a.

[Sean Hayes]

Half. Yeah, that was.

[Laura Dern]

Great. Those were a couple years in my life where I discovered empathy as this, like, badass superpower that being vulnerable and being empathetic and being part of a, you know, a team of people where you're just gonna kind of reveal yourself to each other and it's gonna somehow be hopefully safe and generous and move an audience. It was, like, so radical and hardcore and.

Baller. You know, I felt. I. Yeah, I felt like a kid who just found a.

[Jason Bateman]

Sport. Yeah, it is just, like, it's the craziest thing in the world to sit there and. And be so full of shit that you can make yourself cry and probably make the person watching cry. And, like, everybody's on board that we're playing make believe. The people that are doing it are in make believe. And I'm pretending that it's real, so much so that it's making me cry while I'm watching it. Like, everyone signs on to this, like, bizarro moment that we all go in this dark room together and sit next to these strangers, cry next to one another, and then go leave, get in our car and drive home and have what's for dinner. It's just, like, the coolest, weirdest thing, but it's.

[Will Arnett]

So. On a certain level, I can't believe hearing you say it that way, jb you realize it is all just about. We all just want to connect, and we all just want to connect with each other and have these shared experiences, because something about that, it inspires us. It makes us. We can relate to.

[Jason Bateman]

It. Life's really interesting. Interesting to people. You know, like, let's see these little.

[Will Arnett]

Pieces. And you go, well, you. You go. And you. You know, at its greatest, when you go and you see something that kind of moves you in that way, having that emotional connection to that or having that shared experience, not even just with the people in the theater, but the people on. When you're watching it, I guess, and it's just occurring to me for the first time. Maybe I'm just a slow learner. It. It does. There's something about it that. That, like, it sort of. It stirs something in us and makes us sort of gives us perspective on our own experience. And it sort of answers questions about our own experience and all that kind of stuff. I think it's illuminating to the human spirit, if you will. As bullshitty as that sounds, I really actually believe that.

[Sean Hayes]

Now. Today, I cried at Force.

[Jason Bateman]

Awakens. Yeah, I'll bet you.

[Will Arnett]

Did. Yeah, I bet you.

[Jason Bateman]

Did. Did the projector break or.

[Sean Hayes]

Something? No, I.

[Will Arnett]

Cried. Were you sitting behind somebody with a hat or.

[Jason Bateman]

Something? Did you spill your.

[Sean Hayes]

Bonbons.

With snow.

[Will Arnett]

Caps? They ran out of.

[Laura Dern]

Milk.

But it is crazy that, you know, you can't fake truth. Like, you could. You could fake a lot of things. And you guys all know, as incredible actors and also as directors, that. That there's this other thing that happens that we all feel together when we get to the truth of a thing, and it can't be faked.

[Jason Bateman]

Right? But, like, at the same time, we're all pretending that it isn't fake. Like, we know that it's fake, and we're all just saying, okay, let's all agree to focus so hard that we can convince ourselves and our tear ducts and everything that this is real. Like, I love that everybody just kind of silently signs onto that and no one knows each.

[Will Arnett]

Other.

But in those moments, it is real. That's kind of the flip of it.

[Sean Hayes]

Jb. Well, that's the magic of.

[Jason Bateman]

Movies. We'll be right.

[Will Arnett]

Back.

Shit. Sean's mic is working.

Hey, I was watching jb, weirdly enough, on Instagram, Cross. David cross posted a clip from Arrested Development, and I was watching.

[Jason Bateman]

Oh. Oh, no. I saw him doing Stand.

[Will Arnett]

Up. No, and you were doing a scene.

[Sean Hayes]

From. Early.

[Will Arnett]

On. You were doing a scene with. With David and Portia, and there was something about you. I was watching you do this scene, and you were. And they're both acting like imbeciles, and so you're in the middle between them. And I was so on the ride with you. You were such a great. You took me on this thing, and I know it inside and out, and yet I was still really taken with you doing. And it's not you, Jay, but you were doing this thing, and it made me laugh, and it made me feel good, and I had a connection to it on a deeper level as well. But it made me love you. And I was just like, fuck, look at this guy. He's so good at doing.

[Jason Bateman]

This. I love it. Why people say all those nasty things about.

[Sean Hayes]

You. Well, yeah, if we believe it, then the audience will believe it. Laura, do you. You had a. Oh.

[Will Arnett]

Shit. Sorry. You may have mentioned Sean Sean's got a spaghetti meatballs that's on the stove, and so he's gotta get to his questions.

[Laura Dern]

Quick. No, he's got to come in and give.

[Sean Hayes]

Him. By the way, I just said. I just said Chinese with. What did I have to drink? A glass of milk because it was too.

[Will Arnett]

Spicy. Hang.

[Jason Bateman]

On. It's.

[Sean Hayes]

4:30. What do you mean.

[Will Arnett]

7:30? He's in New.

[Sean Hayes]

York. New.

[Jason Bateman]

York. You are in New.

[Sean Hayes]

York?

[Will Arnett]

Yeah. By the way, JB. By the way, JB. I had a FaceTime with him before. The three of us had a FaceTime before our session here, Laura. And then before that, Sean and I talked like an hour ago about something. And I go. And Sean goes, I gotta go. I gotta eat before we do the show. And he goes. And I go, oh, yeah, okay, I'll let you go. And he goes, I'm having.

[Jason Bateman]

Chinese.

Three day dinner's an event in his life. I love.

[Sean Hayes]

That.

I haven't had Chinese in so long. Laura, do you like Chinese.

[Laura Dern]

Food? I love it. I love it. I'm not as much as Nepo. Nepo talks a lot about how much he loves.

[Sean Hayes]

Chinese. He can't get enough of.

[Jason Bateman]

It. I'd like Chinese.

[Sean Hayes]

Tonight. Hey, this is the. I promise this is the only Jurassic park question I'll. But when we were on the set of Is It Real? No. Is this thing on? We were on the set. You told me the greatest story. Can you just tell it really fast? Cause it's so cool. Something about. Do you remember what it was it was.

[Laura Dern]

About? Oh, was it about Steven with the megaphone? The first.

[Sean Hayes]

Day? That's.

[Will Arnett]

It.

[Sean Hayes]

Yes.

[Laura Dern]

Yes. Yeah. That we were. I mean, this was the first CGI movie. So all we knew was we were going on this journey and there was this new.

Idea called cgi, and there was this company called ilm, Industrial Light Magic. And, you know, Dennis Muren was this guy I met on set. And they were talking about how they could paint an image on the computer and things might show up that aren't there in real life. And they would put an X on a piece of paper and put it in, like, an orange picker up into a tree, and they stare at the X. And I kept thinking, ooh, this may really not work. Because it just seemed nuts that it was even possible. And it was the first day. I think it was like, second or third day on set. And it was the first day we were all there as a group. And we're looking into the. What was the Raptor Pen, I guess. And Sir Richard Attenborough is kind of giving us a tour of the park. And they're supposed, for the first time, we hear something that may be a roar in the.

[Sean Hayes]

Distance. That's.

[Laura Dern]

Right. It's like your first hint of something. And we did the first take and we were all, like, looking in the wrong direction and not responding at the right time. So he said, stephen, we need help. I mean, yeah, nothing's there, but we need to hear it at the same moment. He goes, oh, my God, of course, of course. And obviously we had to be scared to sell the things that aren't there.

So Stephen was sitting at camera, and they rolled. Camera, action. We're looking, we turn our heads, and the moment's about to come, and Steven takes a megaphone and goes, roar, roar.

And we all lost it. And I know in that moment, this group of actors looked at each other like, this is a disaster.

[Sean Hayes]

That. That must have been like, wait, what are we doing? Like, what? So you're just gonna go rawr. Through the whole.

[Jason Bateman]

Movie? Like, he lost his.

[Will Arnett]

Privilege. It also occurs to me, Laura, you're. You've become like sort of like the emblem, like the. The sort of the icon for. They always use that image of a person. Yes. For me, you're my icon. Yeah, obviously. Yeah, you're my. But that thing of you, of the. Of the big dinosaur coming up, like, right up against your face and you're totally freaked out. That is like such an iconic. You know, they always include that. It's like a huge. When you see that. Do you remember the day you were shooting it? Do you remember what you were going through? Do you remember.

[Sean Hayes]

Like. Yeah, the.

[Laura Dern]

Reaction? Yeah, yeah. That was crazy. And I mean, it was amazing because the incredible Stan Winston had built animatronic puppets. So there was so much.

[Jason Bateman]

Practical. That's a real head there.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. And it was. Yeah, you.

[Will Arnett]

Cuss. I've heard of.

[Laura Dern]

Crazy. Like, scary as fuck. Like, nothing.

[Will Arnett]

Scary. Oh, shit. We don't use.

[Jason Bateman]

Them. Sorry. Not from the women, not from the only.

[Laura Dern]

People.

And a third time, not from the women. But it was so scary. Those dinosaurs were.

[Sean Hayes]

Terrifying. Yeah. I mean, isn't it wild? I'm sorry if you get asked this all the time, but isn't it wild to be part of something that you had no idea what it was gonna be? It was cutting edge technology, and now it spawned, like, I don't know how many movies it was part of, like, this massive movement in Hollywood that changed how they made movies. And you were amusement park. You were the first person. You were part of it. That's just so.

[Laura Dern]

Cool. I'd made Wild at Heart, I guess, like, like the year before, two years before or something like that. And so I told Nick Cage that I had been offered this opportunity. And I was like, you know, I haven't read it yet, but all I know is Stephen explained that I guess there's dinosaurs are gonna come back to life and there's a book, I'm gonna read the book. And he goes, you don't have to know anything. Dinosaurs are gonna come back to life. You have to do this movie. And I just remember Nick being the person who, yeah, made me know I had to say yes instantly before learning.

[Will Arnett]

More. Wait, okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Laura. So Sean opened the door and then you just mentioned Wild at Heart. So first of all, it should be noted, Laura made. You made so many great movies with the incomparable David lynch, who I know is a close friend of yours as well. And he was just, you know, one of the all time greats. And the two of you had this great collaboration on all these great movies. First one being Blue Velvet. Just talk for a second about how that came to be so.

[Laura Dern]

Good. Met him on an audition.

And.

[Jason Bateman]

What part was he reading.

[Laura Dern]

For? 17.

And he was very good, to be honest, but crazily I went in and we talked for, I feel like 45 minutes with the casting director and David about everything, and I never read for him. And the casting director had seen me in a couple of films and I guess recommended me. But he, I don't think had seen my acting yet, but he just had an instinct and he was so a believer in following instinct. And.

It seemed to go well. I mean, I just was, you know, so in love with his movies already. So it was such a huge thing to me. I'd seen Eraserhead, I'd seen Elephant man, and so I was just blown away by him. And then he invited myself and Kyle MacLachlan to lunch at Bob's Big Boy. And I remember him doodling on a plate in ketchup, making like the most abstract and amazing drawings on his plate while the two of us were just talking and chatting it up and him watching the two of us. And I could see in his eyes him starting to see his movie. And it was an amazing feeling as an actor, you know, it wasn't about us necessarily or us separately, but as a whole there was something that he felt was right for the film. So that was really cool.

[Sean Hayes]

Experience. Yeah, that's.

[Will Arnett]

Great. I mean, that Must have.

[Laura Dern]

Been. Interestingly, I got.

[Will Arnett]

Cast.

When you started making Blue Velvet. Well, it sounds like you did at that moment understand that you were doing something different. Like that doing with him was.

[Laura Dern]

Different. I didn't know what it was gonna be or it was such an insane, brilliant and insane script and world.

Terrifying and beautiful and all the things that, you know, and hilarious and all the things that Blue Velvet is.

But I had just started college. I was on day two when I got offered the movie and was beside myself and was told that I couldn't leave school. They wouldn't let me have a leave of absence. So I went to the head of the program I was in to say, here's the script, here's everything. Can I have a tutor? And I'll, you know, make a. Whatever it takes, you know, behind the scenes, like, I'll do whatever I can do. Please, please. And I remember saying to this professor, I just have this feeling this is my college education.

And they told me that not only would I never be invited back to this university if I chose the movie, but that I was making, you know, the most radical mistake of my life. And so I remember entering that whole experience thinking, which I don't think I ever would have understood if I hadn't watched my parents with these directors and had this feeling with David, like, this is my not only home, but this is my teacher. This is my college. This will be. I mean, in some unconscious way, I think I did know this is the greatest.

[Will Arnett]

Opportunity. You were literally at a crossroads. You were literally at a crossroads and you chose to go that way. And it seems that you made the right choice. We don't have to name that professor by name, but if you'd like to take the opportunity to shame them, that'd be fine.

[Jason Bateman]

Right? Please. Well, if you, if you, if you. What was, what was running second place as far as a possible career path for you? Was there ever anything else on your radar or since then, like if somebody said, you can't do this anymore, gotta do something else.

[Laura Dern]

To. I'd be pretty.

[Jason Bateman]

Fucked. Really? Yeah, I think I'd be pretty.

[Laura Dern]

Now. I would definitely be at like 12. I had, at 12, I had an idea about being a child psychologist that was really interesting to me.

As Will knows, I loved being a.

[Will Arnett]

Swimmer. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Laura, A psychologist for children. Not a 12 year old psychologist. Not a child.

[Sean Hayes]

Psychologist. Right.

[Jason Bateman]

Yes.

We'll be right.

[Sean Hayes]

Back.

Amazon Five Star Theater presents real customer reviews performed by me, Sean Hayes. Today's a brown leather.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Wallet. As someone who seeks to embody the essence of the alpha. I was drawn to this wallet not only for its durability and craftsmanship, but also for the way it unleashed my inner bull energy. Yet the true magic lies in its ability to tap into my primal instincts. As I run my fingers over its smooth surf, I am reminded of the raw power of the bull. Fearless, dominant. With each transaction, I assert my dominance with confidence, knowing that I carry the spirit of the bull within.

[Sean Hayes]

Me. 5 stars Rick0 and scene. This has been another episode of Amazon's Five Star Theater. Whatever you're looking for this holiday, find the perfect gift on Amazon.

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And back to the.

[Jason Bateman]

Show.

Where does the swimming come.

[Will Arnett]

From? Yeah, she's a.

[Jason Bateman]

Swimmer. When did that.

[Laura Dern]

Start? Love it. Since I was little and then became, you know, just in school, competitive swimmer. And Will knows way too much about.

[Sean Hayes]

It. And in the movie is this thing on, you play an Olympic volleyball player and I remember when we were starting and you're like God, I really gotta like figure this out. I gotta find how. Like I gotta do the work. And you went and you played volleyball, right? Or something. Or you took lessons or something like.

[Jason Bateman]

That.

[Sean Hayes]

Really? And in the movie in the shots and everything, I'm like, oh, my God. I completely believe that you were a volleyball player for the olympics. I mean, 100%.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. It's.

[Laura Dern]

True. Thank.

[Jason Bateman]

You. I don't remember you. I've seen it twice. I don't remember. Was it just the one picture that has.

[Laura Dern]

You. Yeah, there's a picture, and there's one quick cutaway of where she.

[Jason Bateman]

Spikes. Yeah, got it.

[Laura Dern]

Okay. Spiking. But I think it's mostly, well, two things. One, as Will and I both can talk about, you guys all know that Bradley is, like, such a radical, disciplined beyond compare.

Perfectionist in his drive of whatever it is. The truth. The Philly cheesesteak sandwich. The movie. It's gotta be the one. And so.

I feel like I pride myself sometimes on throwing myself into things, but in this case, I was like, oh, yeah. Even if it's not in the movie, I gotta get up two hours before and train. Because, you know, the manner at which you hold yourself and the way you carry your body when it's embedded in you is. Yeah. Is different. And her manner is.

[Will Arnett]

Different. And. Sean. Jason. Sean. Maybe, you know, a little bit. But when we were talking about. Like, when Bradley said, I think that Laura's gonna do. Agreed to do this. Which totally elevated everything that we were talking about doing once she agreed. And it was. And he always describes it, he's like, this character needs to be an assassin, and Laura is a fucking assassin. So when she started to really.

[Laura Dern]

Inhabit, that really hurt my.

[Will Arnett]

Feelings. I know. No, because she's literally killed people. She's killed people. She's a.

[Laura Dern]

Sniper. We wouldn't get.

[Will Arnett]

Into. She does. She has. She has silencers. She does piano wire. She's an assassin. No, but she. That she. That she. You know, this idea. And then she started to carry herself with that thing, like, she had this sort of. Like, that sort of competitive athlete edge to her. It was fucking rad. And we did some work.

[Jason Bateman]

Beforehand. So, Will, so what was that like when you started to go through just Even. Just the reading the script, sort of rehearsal process? I'm assuming you guys did. Was there a moment where you're sitting across the table from Laura and you start seeing Laura do Laura stuff and, like, you start seeing that talent, you're like, oh, I better. Really? Kind.

[Will Arnett]

Of. Yeah, 100%. I mean, we. We had the luxury. I mean, JB, I will tell you, yes, first of all, a lot. And she's the most gracious and. And warmest and kindest person. And really, you know, I just Vouch for that. Hell, yeah. Held my hand and we were such partners. And then she was just. And we. We started and we read a bunch early on and went through the script, and she had so many great ideas for leading up to it. And then we went through this great rehearsal process together and did this workshop, which was super rad and where we got to know each other, and that's why we know way too much about each other's lives.

Really, everything. And then we ended up, you know. Yeah. When you're just, you know, in the scene, of course, it occurred to me that I'm like, oh, well, wait. And I said this to Laura, like, early on, I said, like, you know, it's like, for me, this is such a leap. Again, Laura, you can plug your ears or whatever to embarrass her. She's Laura Dern, Academy Award winning. Just super talent. And watching her, it's like playing tennis with a great. And it just does nothing but just. It raises all boats. High tide. But I was nervous and I expressed it. I told her that, and I said, I feel nervous. And she was really, really gentle with me, you.

[Laura Dern]

Know. Well, let me just say this is a great privilege on Smartless, because being a radical fan of all three of you, not to mention your incredible friendship and the way you can destroy or mock each other with so much love, is an art no one else and no other friendship knows. But let me be the person who gets to be on Smartless to pay homage to Will's bravery, because Sean was there with us and I know, Jason, you've seen.

[Sean Hayes]

It. Like, incredible.

[Laura Dern]

Performance.

[Sean Hayes]

Incredible.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. Who he is, what he's willing to reveal, his vulnerability, his willingness to.

Yes. Take my hand and for us to explore everything with each other for these characters in this, you know, 25 year relationship. But, oh, my God, the truth, the.

Heartbreak that he exposes within himself and to me is, like, unparalleled. So it's me who has to say how blessed I was really. Like, no bullshit. To be staring in his eyes and before forced to be honest and see myself in ways sometimes was not comfortable and also beautiful and revelatory. What a actor.

[Jason Bateman]

People. Even just the bravery, how it just started even early by Will just like just writing it, you know, with Chappie, like saying, well, yeah, I'm gonna try to write a script and it's not gonna be like, you know.

Silly. This is gonna be like real stuff from the heart, like a drama, a raw drama. And then like, expect it to be taken seriously and read by People that are like Academy Award winning and nominated people. And then. And then. And then they say, okay, we're doing.

[Laura Dern]

It.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah. It's.

[Sean Hayes]

Like. You're like, oh, just kidding. Just.

[Jason Bateman]

Kidding. Yeah, now. And now I gotta, like, be a great actor in this thing and then pulling that off too. Like, it's just pretty.

[Sean Hayes]

Cool. So.

[Will Arnett]

Beautiful. Oh, thank. Thank you, guys. Thank you. It was scary. There. There were a couple. There were a couple great moments. And. And Laura, will I tell you, this is. We were. We were making the movie and we were trying to get this scene, and we had a crazy. Trying to get this. Trying to get the scene. We had a crazy day where we rehearsed all morning with the crew standing.

[Sean Hayes]

By. It's the scene towards the end of the.

[Will Arnett]

Movie. Yeah. And then we shot all afternoon in, and it was tough. And we just. You know, it's one of those days where you're just swimming. You're like, did we get it? Are we getting it? Are we close or are we super far away and are we just swimming even further away from what we want and all this kind of stuff. And over the weekend, it was a Friday, and so we wrapped late on the Friday night, and over the weekend, Laura and Bradley and I ended up having a bunch of conversations over the weekend. And Laura and I had this. It was. I don't know how you felt, but for me, that was such a turning point. And we had this really awesome, honest conversation about just all of it and being honest with each other about how we felt and blah, blah. And it was like this crazy turning point for us in the movie. And from that point on, we were such partners. And I take. I love that people respond to our relationship in the movie, but I will say that, like, you were. It was born out of real.

[Laura Dern]

Experience. Yes. A million.

[Will Arnett]

Percent.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. You can tell the chemistry is.

[Will Arnett]

Real.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. And it's interesting that we didn't get there because the first sort of half of the shoot, we were in this antagonistic dynamic. And so it was like when we had to truly face each other and be boundaryless about who you were then, you know, and you really held my heart in it. And, you know, I said stuff you don't. You know, that's what's incredible. Right. In these intimate relationships, as you were talking about Jason, like, there we are in this familial story that we're trying to tell all together, but that we were truly the most honest I've ever.

[Will Arnett]

Been. Me too. Ever. And I remember we showed up, we shot this scene that's not in the movie where we go to the hospital. It was the first thing on Monday, and we all. And we. So we had this great conversation, a couple conversations, and we showed up and it was like, from that moment on, it was just unreal. Like that. That scene. It just didn't work in the movie. The scene is fucking great. And it was like, oh, it just changed everything. It was really wild. And for me, anyway, it was the first time I've experienced.

[Jason Bateman]

It. Can we enjoy that scene on DVD.

[Will Arnett]

Extras? Yeah, I'm gonna load it up on the Internet pretty.

[Sean Hayes]

Soon. Okay.

[Jason Bateman]

Great. Don't you miss DVD.

[Will Arnett]

Extras? As soon as I figure I do miss DVD.

[Laura Dern]

Extras. And Sean and Scotty, I mean, what miraculous best friends. I know Will actually has them in his life. I just pretended. And you were the best friends I'd ever had. We ended up on a group text I felt so excited.

[Sean Hayes]

About. Really good.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah. I love that. The first day we showed up, Willie was so sweet. He said, I feel like my family just showed up on set. It was very kind, very sweet. That was so fun.

[Will Arnett]

Fine. Sean had to do. Sean does this scene. By the way, I don't know if you've told this. Sean does this scene. Laura knows. I mean, so we're in the Oyster Bay house, and he's got to. He and Scotty have to go, and it's a stretch. They had to go in and raid the fridge at night for all the, like, terrible soup and ice cream.

[Jason Bateman]

Right. All right. And you're on the couch trying.

[Will Arnett]

To sleep, and so they're supposed to be in bed. He's like. And he goes like, yeah, I think they're kind of high and whatever. Sean eats a gummy. And so all day he's trying to time when he's going to eat the gummy for that.

[Jason Bateman]

Scene. Wow. Nice.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Shaunie.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah. Thank you. Thank.

[Will Arnett]

You. He kept going to me, like, do you think it's too early if I eat it right.

[Sean Hayes]

Now? Because I want to eat it right when we shoot.

[Laura Dern]

It.

[Sean Hayes]

Right. Laura, I want to know, like, who other than the three of us? Because I know that's what you would joke around and say, but truly, because you've been around, because you've been around it since you were a kid. Who were you starstruck the most by growing up or recently or anything? Or do you even get it? And I always ask Jason that, too, because you guys obviously grew up in the business and I didn't. And so I'm always like, wow, I'm still like, wow, wow, wow. And I know you guys are, too, but, like, who is. Is there a person recently or even when you were younger that you were like, okay, I can't believe I'm working with this person or I'm meeting this.

[Laura Dern]

Person. I don't know about you, Jason. I feel like sometimes I feel like I'm the most starstruck. And maybe because.

The equity for mastering something or loving something was all about movies in my family. So if I meet heroes, I lose my mind. But it's movie actors and directors and musicians big time.

[Sean Hayes]

Too. Oh, musicians.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. Meeting music heroes is a big.

[Sean Hayes]

Deal. Yeah.

[Jason Bateman]

Yeah. For sure. Yeah, yeah. What is that about? Musicians and athletes and actors. They all kind of want to.

[Sean Hayes]

Be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's a world you don't. You're not in. So it's like, wow.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. I get that it's a crazy thing, but I think for me, like, meeting heroes of another time was always such a huge.

[Will Arnett]

Gift. Like Alexander the.

[Laura Dern]

Great. Alexander the Great was huge. Oh, well, I told you that story. Like I said, he knows all my.

[Sean Hayes]

Stories. No, because I remember. I remember when. When Rashida Jones was on, I was like, she just grew up with, like, Michael Jackson coming over for dinner. I'm like, that's crazy. I'm like.

[Laura Dern]

What? I know, but I've become friends. Can I say that? Which is insane. And so privileged with Carol Burnett, because I produced this show, Palm Royale, and, like, working with her, knowing her and even though she knew my mom and, you know, there are these crossover things, but when you have your own relationship with these legends that raised you on their talent, raised you on their show. That's crazy. Yeah. Actually, I did just find. And Jason will relate to this, because it was of an era that we grew up around. My mom's Battle of the Network Stars.

[Jason Bateman]

Award. No.

[Laura Dern]

Way. CBS won when she was on the team.

[Will Arnett]

Yes. No.

[Laura Dern]

Way. And it was such a. I became such a fan. I was like, oh, my God. Battle of the Network Stars. This is like the greatest award. I can't believe I have her Battle of the Network Stars Award. Because you realize it's the way things entered your living room. Like, Lucy, there will never be a greater.

[Jason Bateman]

Hero.

[Laura Dern]

Right? Andy Griffith Show. Like, the things.

[Jason Bateman]

That. Why don't they bring that goddamn show.

[Will Arnett]

Back? We talked about it for a minute. Didn't we talk about.

[Laura Dern]

It? And we talked. We actually. We were at a dinner with Ted Sarandos telling him they should make Battle of the Network.

[Jason Bateman]

Stars. Right? Battle the Platform Stars. Right?

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah. Streaming.

[Jason Bateman]

Stars. Yeah, streaming stars. Exactly. Netflix. People against Amazon. People against Apple. People against. Yeah, that'd be funny. People.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah.

[Jason Bateman]

Killer. How great would that Netflix. But then what would you put it on? What platform would get.

[Laura Dern]

To. We know who's winning to be.

[Jason Bateman]

2B. I'll put it on Tubi. I'm not sure. Do I have to.

[Sean Hayes]

Be?

That's such an old.

[Will Arnett]

Reference.

That's an old smartless reference, which is a weird thing to.

[Jason Bateman]

Say. Old.

[Sean Hayes]

Right?

[Will Arnett]

Yeah. Oh.

[Sean Hayes]

Man.

[Will Arnett]

Laura. Laura, I could just. I could just talk to you all day.

[Jason Bateman]

Right? Save it for the sequel, you.

[Laura Dern]

Guys. Yeah, yeah. Oh, we've already.

[Sean Hayes]

Discovered. Is this thing still.

[Will Arnett]

On? We've discussed. Is this thing still.

[Laura Dern]

On? And then you came up with the title for the third or fourth film.

[Will Arnett]

Which. What was.

[Laura Dern]

It? Like somebody turned this thing the fuck off or.

[Will Arnett]

Something? Yeah, somebody please turn this thing.

[Laura Dern]

Off. Please turn this thing.

[Sean Hayes]

Off. That's.

[Laura Dern]

Hilarious. The final.

[Sean Hayes]

Adventure. Say the date when the movie comes out again. So we.

[Will Arnett]

Know. December.

[Sean Hayes]

19Th. December 19th. December.

[Will Arnett]

19. December 19. Is this thing on? Starring the great Laura.

[Laura Dern]

Derby. Will.

[Will Arnett]

Arnett. Yeah. The great Laura.

[Laura Dern]

Derby. Sean.

[Will Arnett]

Hayes. Sean Hayes and Scott Eisenle. Andrew Day. Bradley Cooper and the Bradley Cooper film this Christmas. Take your heart on it. Can I do the on my own.

[Jason Bateman]

Trailer? Please.

[Sean Hayes]

Do. Please take your.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Heart. Take your heart on a funny.

[Sean Hayes]

Bone. Drop of funny.

[Will Arnett]

Bone. What? Every once in a while a film comes along that'll touch your heart and then I feel good.

[Sean Hayes]

Dude.

That's literally every.

[Will Arnett]

Trailer. You know, like in the 80s, every trailer did that, you.

[Sean Hayes]

Know? Laura, we love you. Thank.

[Will Arnett]

You. Laura, we love you. We love.

[Laura Dern]

You. We love you guys. To be on this brilliant, incredible ride that is called smartless and your guys.

[Jason Bateman]

Friendship. I'm so glad you're here. It's overdue, but I guess we had to time it to your release and.

[Will Arnett]

Everything. I know. It is long overdue. We had to wait. We had to wait. We've been talking about this since March. But, Laura, I will see you really.

[Laura Dern]

Soon. Thank.

[Will Arnett]

You. I love you.

[Laura Dern]

Too. I love all of you. And I'm gonna see. Literally, I'm seeing you instantly. I think we're like taking it on the road. As soon as you're done. As soon as I'm done with.

[Will Arnett]

You right now, we're going to. I'll see you in.

[Laura Dern]

London. I'll see you in London. And I'll see you guys very soon, I.

[Jason Bateman]

Hope. Yeah, some sort of a holiday party or.

[Laura Dern]

Something. I'm sad we aren't making Ozark anymore. But I know we're doing other.

[Sean Hayes]

Things.

[Laura Dern]

Yeah. In our near future.

[Will Arnett]

Please. You know what I got last night when we were waiting? We're at the valet. Real Hollywood.

[Jason Bateman]

Moment.

[Will Arnett]

Yeah. And Ed Sheeran came over to Jason Bateman. Jason was complaining because the guy lost his ticket for his ride. It was great. It was a great.

[Jason Bateman]

Him.

Like, don't make me snap this.

[Will Arnett]

Off. And I was. And I was making it worse because he's legit frustrated. I'm like, look at baby coming up the line and stuff. He was not happy. And then Ed Sheeran came over and said, oh, man, I love Ozark. And they gave him a hug and they. And they.

[Laura Dern]

Hugged. Oh.

[Will Arnett]

That. Did you know that was Ed Sheeran? You don't know.

[Jason Bateman]

Anything. I did. I figured it out. No, of course.

[Laura Dern]

Well. And then you hand it him. Your wig as a thank.

[Jason Bateman]

You. And I said, here, let me give you the. Let me sign this for you. It's right there on the.

[Laura Dern]

Netting.

A Sharpie will work on the netting and the.

[Sean Hayes]

Label.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Uhhuh.

[Laura Dern]

God. He a label maker as well for his wigs. I love you.

[Jason Bateman]

Guys. Love you.

[Laura Dern]

Lord. Love you guys so.

[Will Arnett]

Much. We'll see you.

[Laura Dern]

Soon. So.

[Will Arnett]

Soon. We'll see you very soon, Laura. We love.

[Laura Dern]

You. Love you. Thanks, guys, for having.

[Jason Bateman]

Me.

[Laura Dern]

Bye.

[Will Arnett]

Bye. Bye.

[Laura Dern]

Bye. Bye.

[Jason Bateman]

Guys.

That Laura Dern. How lucky did you. Did you and Bradley get by getting her? I mean, it's just, like, so dependent on somebody that kind of comes out of the screen as like, someone you just. You. You want to make an emotional investment.

[Will Arnett]

In.

[Jason Bateman]

Right? You.

[Will Arnett]

Just.

[Jason Bateman]

You. You can't help but love.

[Sean Hayes]

Her. And also the.

[Will Arnett]

Pedigree. The pedigree. And she's.

[Sean Hayes]

Just. And the talent and the.

[Will Arnett]

History. This. She's got no choice when it. In the talent. She's one of those people. It's just. It's just in her.

[Sean Hayes]

In. I mean, before I. Before I knew her for years and years and years and years and years, we would go, how you doing? Because of.

[Jason Bateman]

Her.

Oh, you'd say that to.

[Will Arnett]

Your. Remember those times?

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah. Remember that? How you doing? Yeah, no, no.

[Jason Bateman]

We. I'm gonna.

[Will Arnett]

Take. We weren't in Glen Ellen, Illinois, man.

[Jason Bateman]

So.

[Sean Hayes]

Yeah. I have a nose. What.

[Will Arnett]

Humor. Smelling your. Are you smelling your fingers? What? Did you just pull out a nose hair?

[Jason Bateman]

Sure. Hey, why don't you just. By the way, I. Every time I see you, you've got, like, these animals coming out of.

[Will Arnett]

Those. What is going on?

[Jason Bateman]

The. Get a.

[Will Arnett]

Nose. She has gotten to you. Are you drunk on MSG from The Chinese food.

[Sean Hayes]

What's. No, it's hanging out. I know, but you guys get. You have them.

[Jason Bateman]

Too. Sure, but I attacked.

[Will Arnett]

Them. We're gonna be out of here in a.

[Jason Bateman]

Minute. Scotty comes in to reapply your lip balm. Have him whack a few hairs out of your.

[Sean Hayes]

Nose. Okay. I put it on the lips.

[Jason Bateman]

List.

[Sean Hayes]

Okay. Is.

[Will Arnett]

It. Is it coming out of your ears.

[Sean Hayes]

Too? No, I never get it out of my.

[Jason Bateman]

Ears.

[Sean Hayes]

Really? Yeah. She did, though, mention Laura. Didn't mention the word later hosen. And I always want to say what, you know, what, you know, the same thing of later hosen. Okay. Right. Like kind of. It's kind of the same thing as saying, you know, later.

[Jason Bateman]

Hose. Well, I mean, like.

[Sean Hayes]

By.

Hey, bye hosen. That's what.

[Will Arnett]

I. Or bye hoser. That's what we.

[Jason Bateman]

Say.

[Will Arnett]

Bye.

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[Sean Hayes]

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