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Ryan Seacrest
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Shane Topp
No purchase necessary. VGW Group void where prohibited by Law 21. Terms and conditions apply. Hi. Welcome to Smosh Mouth. I'm Shane.
Amanda
And I'm Amanda. And we have a special guest here, Angela Girardani.
Shane Topp
Angela Jury.
Angela Giordani
I'm Angela Ghirardelli.
Shane Topp
Angela Ghirardelli's. Okay. This episode is gonna be cool.
Amanda
Very cool.
Shane Topp
We are doing Try not to Laugh the podcast today. The rules of that are simple. Very soon, once we yell start, we cannot laugh. If you laugh, you get a mark. I have a. I have this page here with all of our names, and you get a mark, you get a tally. Whoever has the least amount of tallies at the end of this episode gets a $20 gift card to wherever they want.
Amanda
Wherever we want.
Angela Giordani
Holy shit.
Amanda
Our choice.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Amanda
Can be Target.
Shane Topp
Could be Target. Could.
Amanda
Could be. Very cool.
Angela Giordani
I have been dying to play any type of game where there is an actual prize.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
With money. So this is.
Shane Topp
I haven't gotten that approved from the company yet, but if I have to buy the frigging gift card, I will. Yeah.
Angela Giordani
You guys, I want some stakes.
Shane Topp
I need some stakes.
Amanda
We really wanted to do this because we just want to kind of, like throw out fun things to do, and the three of us, I feel like, always make each other laugh really hard. And I feel like this. This might be hard.
Shane Topp
The next time we do this. We're not gonna intro it like this. We're just gonna. It's just gonna start. But this episode's the first one.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
So we're establishing the rules. We're establishing what's going on. You can. There's, like I said, no rules. You can tell truths, true stories. You can make up bullshit, tell lies. I would say everything that's said on this podcast, don't take it at face value.
Amanda
Nope.
Shane Topp
Don't be going out, out of here and going. That what they said. They said this like, no, we're joking.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. This is silly.
Shane Topp
Everything after this is a means of trying to make the others laugh.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Amanda
All right. Do you have any laughs that you got to get out?
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
All right, now on, I'm only thinking about the sad shit in my life.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Shane Topp
That's not fair.
Angela Giordani
Letting you know the subtext of my brain.
Shane Topp
That's not fair. My life is so good. Okay, are we ready? I'll give us a countdown.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
So that if you guys have second thoughts. Amanda's still laughing.
Angela Giordani
Oh, no, guys.
Amanda
I'm laughing because of the shit I want to tell. Okay.
Shane Topp
I'm gonna so lose.
Angela Giordani
What makes me laugh about you two is you two attempting to do stuff. Yeah, it's not even.
Shane Topp
Thanks, thanks.
Amanda
Thanks a lot.
Angela Giordani
It's not. No, that's not me saying that. It's just when you. I'm done.
Amanda
No, finish your thought now.
Angela Giordani
I'm entering the film.
Shane Topp
No, no, no, no. I'm done. Okay, that's actually. I feel pretty good.
Amanda
Of Andela. Let's be like, I have a great idea. It's Tom. Let's not talk about it.
Shane Topp
Okay? She's. She's in the zone. You're getting in the zone.
Amanda
I'm in the zone.
Shane Topp
I'm getting in the zone. All right, here we go. In five, four, three, two, one. And we've begun. This is a very serious podcast.
Angela Giordani
You fuckers ready?
Shane Topp
Yeah, absolutely, I'm ready. We can talk about whatever we want.
Angela Giordani
Welcome to Smoshmouth.
Shane Topp
That's. That's right. It's pretty good.
Angela Giordani
I'm just warming up.
Shane Topp
You're just warming up.
Amanda
Do you like our sign?
Angela Giordani
I love your sign.
Amanda
Thank you very much. Is it not too big?
Angela Giordani
No, I think it's perfect.
Shane Topp
Mm, good. It is pretty good.
Angela Giordani
Do you make it with your wittle assholes? Did you make it? Do you make it with your I can do this. I can use not cuss word?
Shane Topp
That was pretty good, though. That was pretty good.
Amanda
We didn't make it with our widdle assholes. We didn't make it at all. Another person on Amazon or something made it with their widow asshole or something. Yeah, they made it with their wittle widow wittle little asshole.
Shane Topp
Amanda, you are. You are teetering on the line there.
Amanda
You are teetering on the line as well.
Shane Topp
Just. We're gonna be harsh about these laughs. Okay.
Angela Giordani
How was your guys week?
Shane Topp
The week has been pretty good. Yeah. I think my mustache is getting to a point that I have to really consider what I'm gonna do with it, because it's getting. It's getting there. But there's a lot of benefits. There's a lot of unseen benefits to my mustache.
Amanda
Like what? Touching food?
Shane Topp
So you're kind of.
Amanda
Damn It.
Shane Topp
That's the point for Amanda.
Angela Giordani
The game is begun.
Shane Topp
Amanda is the first to fall by her own doing.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, you did that to yourself.
Amanda
God, I have a big ego.
Shane Topp
Well, you're part of having a mustache. You're kind of part of a network that you never realized. You know, I get nods from other guys with mustaches. There's an understanding that we have amongst each other. There's just a mutual respect there. And it doesn't matter what kind of mustache you have. Angela, you all right?
Angela Giordani
I'm fine, Amanda. Just going. When.
Amanda
When are men nodding at Shane?
Angela Giordani
Oh, I feel like all the time.
Shane Topp
That's not fair.
Angela Giordani
I feel like you get nodded at all the time. Like, you're just at the gym, and.
Amanda
They'Re like, no, no, no.
Shane Topp
That actually. At the gym. That does not happen. Nobody talks at the gym. I am. I don't look at people at the gym.
Angela Giordani
No, but I just feel like you're just like, okay, I'll believe you.
Shane Topp
Thank you.
Angela Giordani
That was a breathe.
Amanda
That was a laugh.
Angela Giordani
Let's talk about what a laugh is. That was.
Amanda
First of all, you're acting like, you know when jeeps beep at each other because you guys have a jeep.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Amanda
You're talking like that.
Shane Topp
Like, it's a little more subtle than that. It's a little more discreet. It's not that.
Amanda
Nice mustache.
Shane Topp
Mustache.
Angela Giordani
If you two believe that that was a laugh. Give me a point. I'm not scared to lose.
Amanda
Oh, you're back at that.
Shane Topp
Oh, you're back at that. I'm gonna give you a pass on that.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, great.
Shane Topp
But I'm.
Angela Giordani
I think both players should believe it was a laugh. And then.
Amanda
Have you guys ever has to come.
Shane Topp
Down to a vote weekend?
Amanda
Have you guys ever been with a boyfriend and you farted and they asked if you farted and you say no, and then you have to keep it up the whole time. It happened to me when I was, like, 15, and I think that's why we broke up, because he asked me if I farted.
Shane Topp
I'm listening.
Amanda
And it was in my room, and it was just us.
Shane Topp
Was it so.
Amanda
And I said no. And he was like, you didn't. And I said no.
Shane Topp
Was it like.
Amanda
And he was like, you farted, and now you're lying.
Shane Topp
And so I'm trying to picture. I'm trying to imagine what you're describing to me, Amanda. And I. I think I'm hearing like.
Amanda
Oh, my God.
Shane Topp
It's another for Amanda.
Amanda
You're stupid.
Angela Giordani
But that almost got you, Angela, you're.
Amanda
The problem was you have tears in your eyes.
Shane Topp
The problem was. It was. It was. It was. There's many farts that come out of that fart machine. You are full on crying right now.
Amanda
And you are laughing.
Shane Topp
Basically, that is. Oh, what? Come, Angela, you're the tiebreaker. Was I laughing just now?
Angela Giordani
I don't think you were laughing.
Amanda
So you guys haven't farted with a boyfriend and denied it until the end of your days?
Shane Topp
You're sitting there. You're sitting there. You're talking. You're watching Gilmore Girls. You're like, ahaha.
Angela Giordani
That's points all around.
Amanda
That's points all around. It was Gilmore.
Shane Topp
Gross.
Amanda
I was not watching Gilmore Girls. I was wrapping coins.
Shane Topp
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
Angela Giordani
I had to let a big one out of the can. No, that was one.
Shane Topp
That's all one. That's all one. Let's come back.
Amanda
I was wrapping coins.
Shane Topp
Are you dead serious? You were wrapping coins? Yes.
Angela Giordani
You mean you were wrapping coins?
Amanda
I worked at Dunkin Donuts. People tipped in coins.
Angela Giordani
You're out.
Shane Topp
It's another one for Amanda.
Angela Giordani
It's really embarrassing when you do it to yourself.
Shane Topp
Angela and I are tied. Same point. But whatever, dudes.
Angela Giordani
Once I was at a friend's house, and she had cushions on our seats. And I perioded a little bit on this. On the cushions through my jeans. This is disgusting. I'm sorry.
Shane Topp
Your jeans are making us sad.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, I'm sorry. But here's the funny part. I saw that. I did that. I freaked out. Okay? I was in, like, college. I took her cushion to the bathroom. Somehow I got up, took the cushion off the kitchen, like, the table. Okay.
Shane Topp
Without anyone noticing.
Amanda
Why was there a cushion on a kitchen table? Just.
Angela Giordani
Oh, no. On the kitchen chair. Okay. This is disgusting. I can't believe I'm telling you guys this story. I mean, I think I dropped, like, a drop. Like, it was like, nothing. But I was mortified.
Amanda
Mortified through jeans.
Angela Giordani
Okay? It was just. This happens to young girls when you're, like, a kid and you're like, 18.
Amanda
Correct.
Angela Giordani
Okay. So I was, like, on her, like, you know, like a normal dining room table, and there's like, a little cushion. I get up and I'm like. Somehow I get up and I take the cushion and I, like, stuff it in my shirt.
Shane Topp
You're like. You're like, no, Gotcha. Gotcha. God, you fell, right?
Angela Giordani
All you had to do was cuddle the period cushion. And I laughed.
Shane Topp
Yeah, that's more disgusting. I just like to think of just subtly taking the thing. You're just sitting there. You're just like, this game is really good anyways. And you just get up and you take the whole chair with you.
Angela Giordani
You know, So I take it into the bathroom, and then I.
Shane Topp
Does that count?
Angela Giordani
No.
Shane Topp
That was.
Amanda
No.
Shane Topp
Right.
Angela Giordani
I stuff it into my jeans. I stuff it into my ass.
Shane Topp
The whole push.
Amanda
Okay, Sorry.
Shane Topp
Wow. Amanda's getting crushed right now.
Amanda
Why would you.
Angela Giordani
I stuff it into this part.
Shane Topp
How. How baggy were your pants?
Angela Giordani
I don't remember. I just remember stuffing it and leaving. Leaving. Because I was. I literally couldn't even just say I made an accident. So I leave and then I leave.
Amanda
And then an accident.
Angela Giordani
Her and her roommates go, where did the cushion go?
Amanda
You left the house.
Angela Giordani
I left with the cushion.
Amanda
Oh, you would.
Shane Topp
What do. What do you think would have happened if you. If you were honest with them?
Angela Giordani
She would have been like, oh, that happens. It's okay. We're all girls.
Amanda
No, but instead, you did the lie.
Angela Giordani
I did the lie. And then I didn't even wash the cushion. And back. I threw away the cushion.
Shane Topp
Well, that's. I. I understand that mindset.
Amanda
They were probably. She probably thinks about it to this day.
Angela Giordani
And they always talked about the missing cushion.
Shane Topp
Who? What?
Angela Giordani
This was, like, my freshman year, and I was hanging out with, like, the missing.
Shane Topp
Missing cushion that you were sitting on. And they don't.
Angela Giordani
It was really embarrassing when you perioded anywhere. It was really embarrassing when you were, like, a young girl.
Amanda
Oh, it's sucked.
Angela Giordani
I thought this would kill.
Shane Topp
Yeah, it's okay. We just kind of feel bad for you. I don't know if I'm going to laugh for the next hour now.
Amanda
I feel so sad. I feel really sad. I feel deep pain. Period on jeans is just a nightmare.
Shane Topp
It's pretty awful.
Angela Giordani
I can't believe this got so bad.
Shane Topp
I broke. I broke for a second, too. I. I got to be honest there. Okay.
Angela Giordani
Not dunk.
Shane Topp
Amanda, you. Something I wanted to kind of return to because I've had this question since we talked about our previous jobs. You mentioned just a second ago that you worked at Dunkin Donuts. I was. I was always. I've always been curious about this. Did people ever return the donuts after they were done using them, to me is so funny.
Amanda
No, they never return the donuts after using them. But I will talk about a chocolate stick one more time. A chocolate stick is a very long, black donut.
Angela Giordani
We have tears.
Shane Topp
Tears are allowed.
Amanda
And when you heat up a chocolate stick, let me tell you, it's very Soft.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Amanda
And it's delicious.
Shane Topp
That sounds great.
Amanda
And I always tried to offer to people, I'd be like, would you like to try a chocolate stick with your coffee?
Shane Topp
Okay.
Angela Giordani
All three of us, people.
Shane Topp
People say that. I laugh at my own jokes, but Amanda's.
Angela Giordani
I would say, I know.
Amanda
Would you like to try a chocolate stick with your coffee? It's really good, heated up. And they'd be like, no.
Shane Topp
All right, that's another. That's a separate sentence. As long as it's the same thing that you're laughing at, we won't tally up more points. But if it's a new sentence, new.
Amanda
Joke, the amount of Dunkin donut stories that I have are insane. Oh, I believe it. But no one has returned a donut that they've already eaten. Kind of fucking question is that.
Angela Giordani
It's a question that made you laugh.
Shane Topp
So I just think it'd be hilarious if you brought the donuts in and you're like, yeah, I used them. They're not that great.
Angela Giordani
You used them.
Shane Topp
You used them. I think we all know what I.
Amanda
What do you mean?
Shane Topp
Never mind.
Angela Giordani
Go into it.
Shane Topp
Look.
Amanda
Yeah, I worked at Dunks.
Shane Topp
So you worked at Dunks.
Amanda
People tipped in coins.
Shane Topp
That sucks. Is that an east coast thing or a Portuguese?
Angela Giordani
I say it's wrong. I cannot believe you just said that. That was an absolute slam dunk by Shane Top.
Shane Topp
I fumbled it.
Angela Giordani
You fumbled it on the line. It bowl. You fumbled the fucking ball on the 10 yard line.
Amanda
It is. It is probably an east coast thing. Probably a Portuguese thing. I don't think every customer that got you.
Shane Topp
I got you.
Amanda
I don't think every country is Portuguese, but yeah, I basically had buckets of coins.
Angela Giordani
And then you farted. And then your boyfriend was like, did you fart? And you said, no. And then he broke up with you. And you. And you said. And you believe that he broke up with you because you lied about her?
Amanda
No, I didn't fart. And he's like, it smells in here. It's just us.
Shane Topp
All right, you, you, Angela, you really worked at it and you eventually got her. Pretty impressive.
Amanda
And I just. We just continue to wrap coins.
Shane Topp
Okay, let's move on from that story.
Angela Giordani
So going into my notes app, so I have something.
Shane Topp
Cause we're talking about previous jobs. Yeah, I talked about how I've only worked on icarly or I've only worked on acting stuff. But I was thinking about it and I went back home after we did that episode with Chance talking about our previous jobs, and I was reading through the script because I still have the old icarly script, and I remember seeing there's a scene that. That got cut that was, in my opinion, some of the funniest shit that I've seen. But they cut it for whatever reason. You know, they cut pages off of every script, and I have it.
Amanda
Oh, God, no.
Angela Giordani
He's playing dirty.
Amanda
Such a fucking liar.
Angela Giordani
No, this is a fucking lie.
Shane Topp
Angela, I'd love for you to read this.
Amanda
Oh, my God.
Shane Topp
I have this script here that I'd love for you to read.
Amanda
Oh, love the font.
Shane Topp
Yeah. You know, that's. That this was. You know, this is the final draft and they just did things differently.
Amanda
Okay.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Shane Topp
What?
Angela Giordani
Just gonna focus. So I don't.
Shane Topp
Yeah, you can just read all the parts.
Angela Giordani
Just all of it.
Shane Topp
Just read all.
Angela Giordani
Oh, this is a trap.
Shane Topp
Look, I. We talked about this show.
Amanda
I have to stay strong. I think I'm losing right now.
Angela Giordani
You did because. Yeah.
Shane Topp
You are, in fact, losing pretty hardcore right now. Amanda.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, I do want everyone to.
Shane Topp
Angela and I are tied.
Amanda
I really want that $20 gift.
Shane Topp
What are you. What are you doing?
Angela Giordani
Yeah, because we. I was prepped for this because Amanda and Shane texted me. Shane texted me, what's up, motherfucker? In all caps. We're back Thursday. Try not to laugh. The podcast.
Shane Topp
Yeah, we're recording this on a Thursday?
Angela Giordani
Yeah. I thought reading your own text back to you would get you to laugh.
Shane Topp
No.
Amanda
Oh, definitely not.
Angela Giordani
Interior I Carly's house, 2008 day. Carly Shea and Sam Puckett are doing the same typical Nickelodeon. Like flinging bookers at a dartboard or making a cake out of garbage. Okay, you got one.
Amanda
I really have to.
Angela Giordani
I. Carly's brother Spencer, huge dumbass and stuff, enters wearing a dunce captain. I don't even know what my job is. This is a trap. Okay, I got it. I got it. I can do this. Hi, Carly. You're the comic relief. You stupid piece of shit.
Amanda
It says comedic.
Angela Giordani
Comedic.
Shane Topp
It's fine.
Angela Giordani
Spencer. Oh, right. Spencer explodes, launching confetti all over the room. Sam. I guess he was a pinata just then.
Shane Topp
Philip Brownlee.
Angela Giordani
Brownlee can canonically thank you. Canonically played by Shane Topp, enters the room. Carly Shay from icarly. Carly. Yeah. Philip walks up and hands her an envelope. Philip, you've been served.
Shane Topp
And that's that. I thought that scene was really great.
Angela Giordani
Watermarked. I think my two broke girls.
Amanda
I think my favorite pretty.
Angela Giordani
We got through it.
Amanda
I think my favorite thing is watching Shane watch Angela read that.
Shane Topp
Just Just intently. Just like, laugh.
Amanda
Like this.
Shane Topp
Laugh. Yes.
Angela Giordani
This is a relic. This should be framed.
Shane Topp
Yeah, I was writing this up.
Amanda
You got two laughs out of it.
Shane Topp
I mean. No, I didn't write this up. I. Sorry, I lied. I found this.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, you found this.
Shane Topp
This is from the. This is from.
Angela Giordani
So it was watermarked two broke girls. So that's been a PA's like.
Shane Topp
Yeah, just an accident. I think that PA probably worked on two broke girls.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. And just got.
Amanda
I love Nickelodeon when they do and stuff.
Shane Topp
Oh, they do flick boogers at dart.
Angela Giordani
Boards and make cakes out of garbage. Yeah.
Shane Topp
I mean, look.
Angela Giordani
Well played. You got two points. And I was.
Shane Topp
Points out of that. That was. That was worth the effort.
Angela Giordani
I feel like I was in the lead before then.
Shane Topp
We were tied. Okay, we're tied.
Angela Giordani
Well, let's fucking go.
Amanda
I have a story. I have a story. Can I tell you this story real quick?
Angela Giordani
I know that before this story, she's going to. She's going to lose out of this.
Amanda
No, I'm not.
Angela Giordani
She's going to laugh.
Amanda
No, I'm not. Guys, this, actually.
Shane Topp
I hate that it worked.
Amanda
I hate that it worked. I got fart.
Shane Topp
I wasn't expecting it to work.
Amanda
Farts always make me laugh.
Shane Topp
The fart machine is. Is such a dangerous choice for me because it makes me laugh every time.
Amanda
It's so dangerous.
Shane Topp
God. My TikTok. My TikTok page is unfortunately figuring out that I. I love farts.
Angela Giordani
Oh, no.
Shane Topp
There's this guy named, like. Wait, his name is, like, the farter. And he can fart on command. And he calls up. He calls up like. He'll call up, like, dominoes. And he'll just be farting into his phone while trying to order a pizza. And they'll be like, yes, you want to. You want pepper? And he just keeps farting. He doesn't. He doesn't let them speak. It's the dumbest bit, but it makes me laugh. I was crying, laughing.
Angela Giordani
And it knows. It. It knows when you're crying.
Shane Topp
It's like I was watching Marley and Me. I was crying so hard.
Amanda
Isn't that a story about a dog dying?
Shane Topp
Yeah, but it's the same amount of tears.
Angela Giordani
See, that was the. That was the joke.
Amanda
Here's my story.
Shane Topp
All right, Amanda.
Amanda
Guys, this really happened to me. Really happened to me. And it was horrendous.
Shane Topp
Okay, so it was horrendous.
Amanda
I was at a friend's birthday hangout. It wasn't yours. And I went to the bathroom, and it was kind of like A club hangout. Like, lots of music. And I walked into the bathroom and there's toilet paper everywhere. All, everywhere. And I walk in and there's like. There's like. Looks like Sharpie writing all over the bathroom.
Angela Giordani
You can't even get through.
Amanda
Looks like Sharpie writing all over the bathroom. And I walk in and I was like, this is crazy. And I don't put my butt on the seat. Cause you don't.
Shane Topp
Right?
Amanda
And then. And then I saw. And then I saw a Sharpie marker on the toilet paper do right on the wall. Cause I was like, oh, so cute. Some. Damn it.
Angela Giordani
Fuck.
Amanda
Somebody left a Sharpie for everyone to write, like, fun stuff on the girls wall.
Shane Topp
That sounds great.
Amanda
Yeah. I pick it up and it's a tampon applicator that's been used and it's black, so I thought it was a Sharpie. So I pick it up and start writing, and it's plastic and it crushes in my hand. That really happened.
Shane Topp
You got Brennan pretty hard.
Amanda
That really happened to me. I was in a stall going like, oh, my God, girls are writing things on the wall. Let me grab this cute little Sharpie that someone left. And it was a plastic tampon applicator. And I went, ah. And I dropped it on the ground. And girls were like, you're done with the bathroom.
Shane Topp
That's another for Amanda. See, this story doesn't hurt me too much or I don't get it. Cause, you know, I've never been into a women's bathroom before. I've never seen a tampon before that.
Amanda
Was supposed to fucking kill.
Shane Topp
I don't know what any of everything that you're saying sounds like. Portuguese.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, that's what we're learning today. That's what we're learning today is period jokes don't work.
Shane Topp
Yeah, they feel very directed. They work when you. You're trying to use the kryptonite on each other.
Angela Giordani
I can't do this. That was like, locked and loaded. That was like, when you have three nerf guns.
Amanda
I try to use the Krypton.
Shane Topp
Fine, I'll give myself a point.
Angela Giordani
That was like when you have three Nerf guns jacked in the little hole and they all come out really close.
Shane Topp
Jacked in the little hole.
Amanda
You need to slow down.
Shane Topp
Sniper chest reference there, guys.
Amanda
I went through a traumatic event, okay? I grabbed a tampon thinking it was a Sharpie.
Angela Giordani
Okay, bitches, I'm gonna need a minute to find a fucking video that's gonna wreck you.
Amanda
Oh, here's another one. I Was at Squirrel straight up. And it was very busy.
Angela Giordani
Pre or post mold?
Amanda
Pre, pre mold. And it was so busy. And you know how they serve juices, like really fancy juices, like $7, but it's like this much. So it was really, really busy. Super long line, and I was getting my stuff and I was really hung my hand down on the table and I actually by accidentally put my whole hand in someone's juice.
Shane Topp
Is that what.
Amanda
I literally had my back turned and I put my hand on the table to get, like, footing because I was really hungry. And I put. I dipped my whole hand in someone's seven dollar juice.
Shane Topp
This only counts as one laugh, but holy shit.
Amanda
I went like this.
Shane Topp
I went, is that where the mold came from?
Angela Giordani
If a woman put her whole hand.
Amanda
In my juice And. And. And I put my whole hand. I went, oh, oh, I'm so sorry. And the girl was like, how do.
Shane Topp
You even put your whole hand in your shoes? What if.
Amanda
Cause the cups. The cups are wide.
Shane Topp
What would you have done if you put your whole hand in her juice? You turn around, you go, I'm so sorry. And she just goes.
Angela Giordani
Got it.
Shane Topp
Got it.
Angela Giordani
Didn't even.
Shane Topp
Wow, I got that one.
Amanda
I put my whole hand in her juice and I literally. I went. And she went. Once I was okay.
Shane Topp
She said, okay.
Amanda
And I went, I'm so sorry. I'll get you another one. And she was like, the line is so long.
Angela Giordani
Whoa, drink your.
Amanda
I was like, I'm so sorry. And she went and took her cup and, like, walked to her seat. And I was like, my hand was covered in turmeric.
Shane Topp
That's the most insane response to that.
Amanda
She went, okay. And then she took the drink. I would have been like, oh, my God, that's hilarious. No worries.
Angela Giordani
But she was like, I think that's so funny. You put your whole hand.
Amanda
I was like, oh, I gotta get a straw.
Shane Topp
Better be careful, Angela. You're teetering right now.
Angela Giordani
Thank you for the. Thank you.
Amanda
I'm so glad that you thought that that was funny because that was real and that happened.
Shane Topp
That's insane.
Amanda
That happened.
Angela Giordani
Years.
Shane Topp
So embarrassing.
Angela Giordani
Once I was sitting in church with my whole family. My mom, we go to church every holiday. And I was holding coffee. Yeah. And we were holding. We were holding. I was holding a coffee and my brother and I like to like kind of go late and pick up coffee in the. On the corner and then have it during the service because it's like a little pick me up. And we're holding the coffee. I was holding My coffee. And I can't explain what happened. I was holding it, and it was during, like, the sermon portion, so it was really quiet, and for some reason, it felt like I was losing my grip on it, but I wasn't moving. I was holding it, and then suddenly I. Fuck.
Shane Topp
Yeah. I mean, you know, Angela, that's.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shane Topp
That's the rules.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
It's okay.
Angela Giordani
It's good.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
Suddenly it felt like I was losing my grip. I just kind of like. Like, I, like, threw it a little, and then as I threw it, I. I, like, tried to grab it. Okay. So, like, I can't explain it. I'm fucking this up. So I'm holding the coffee, and it's like this.
Amanda
Oh, my God.
Angela Giordani
But that's what happened.
Shane Topp
You actually. You got Amanda, but that's what happened.
Angela Giordani
And this huge coffee. I backhanded it onto this woman sitting in front of me during the sermon.
Shane Topp
Was it hot? How hot was it?
Angela Giordani
I backhanded it onto a woman. Like, it's like I took a ball and I went poof. Like. And I don't even know how.
Shane Topp
I was just like, you got her again. That counts as. Again. I'm a little more shocked by this.
Amanda
Here's the thing.
Shane Topp
Wow.
Amanda
From someone who's been in church a lot, that is horrific.
Angela Giordani
Could you imagine?
Shane Topp
So what happened?
Amanda
She's like, oh, look, our Father who.
Shane Topp
Did the sermon, shut.
Angela Giordani
Not shut down.
Amanda
It was like, servants don't shut down.
Shane Topp
I mean, someone just went. I just went, yeah, hot coffee on him.
Angela Giordani
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
Amanda
And she went, the Lord is with thee.
Angela Giordani
It was like, half a cup, only.
Shane Topp
Her head turns around. Full 180.
Angela Giordani
It was wild because it was just like. What was really funny to all of us was that I was. It just went from just being still.
Shane Topp
To me going, yeah, it looked purposeful.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. And I don't know what happened.
Amanda
That one was really funny. Church. Anything. Church. Church is very funny.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. I was at church the last time I was at church for Easter. They asked for offering in crypto.
Shane Topp
Okay. Was that.
Angela Giordani
Did I get anybody past December? Yeah.
Amanda
Crypto doesn't make me laugh. So does crypto make you laugh?
Shane Topp
I wonder if God made crypto crash as a means of punishing that church.
Angela Giordani
Oh, yeah, maybe.
Shane Topp
So this is the Not. I'm not trying to make you laugh. I mean, the game is still on, but I'm not trying to make you laugh. A really cool thing I saw recently was one of our fans pointed out that you and I are in this the same cinematic universe. On a certain show I was on Henry Danger, and you were on Danger Force.
Angela Giordani
Yes.
Shane Topp
And we're both in that shared universe. How cool.
Angela Giordani
This is a trap. You're about to make me laugh.
Shane Topp
I'm not trying to make you laugh. How cool is that? That we take. Were you a villain or were you a good guy or.
Angela Giordani
I was a valet attendant.
Shane Topp
That's awesome.
Amanda
Okay, cool.
Angela Giordani
That was just gonna make me laugh. Cause I was neither.
Amanda
So you were. Oh, no, that's a good guy.
Shane Topp
You're not a bad guy. I'd say you're.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
In.
Angela Giordani
In.
Shane Topp
In superhero terms, if you're not a bad guy, you're a good guy.
Angela Giordani
Are you a villain?
Shane Topp
I was a villain.
Angela Giordani
The villains on there are really cool.
Shane Topp
I was a crazy person. I was like an obsessed, obsessed fan. The villains, like, who likes to collect celebrity socks.
Angela Giordani
Oh, that adds up.
Shane Topp
Adds up. It's the Nickelodeon thing.
Amanda
And you were the valet guy.
Angela Giordani
I was the valet girl. And they were gonna bring me back.
Shane Topp
Oh, really?
Angela Giordani
Yeah. And they just could. They. They couldn't. They were gonna be back twice and they couldn't.
Amanda
Yeah, they couldn't.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Shane Topp
No, I. I think. I think they were gonna bring you back because I was. I was talking to some friends because I still have friends. Friends over at Nickelodeon behind the scenes. This was like a year ago.
Amanda
Correct.
Shane Topp
And they were talking about Danger Force. Because they were talking about, like, oh, yeah, we'd love to have you on it, but if your character could return. They're like, we have this great script coming up and they showed me some of it and I have.
Amanda
Oh, you are so fucked.
Shane Topp
Holy shit. I have a page here from this script.
Angela Giordani
I did not prep for this.
Amanda
Two Broke Girls.
Shane Topp
So, Angela, I'd love for you to read it since you know it. I think you would kill this. So if you could please read this.
Angela Giordani
I'm gonna. I'm gonna be dead in the water.
Amanda
Xylophone.
Angela Giordani
Water Mark. Oh, my God. Okay.
Amanda
That's how you spelled xylophone.
Shane Topp
Shut up.
Angela Giordani
Exterior, White House Day.
Shane Topp
I'm not counting any of this as a laugh.
Angela Giordani
Here we go.
Amanda
Adam Sandler and Ruruto.
Angela Giordani
Here we go. Exterior, White House Day. Captain man and the Danger Force charge out of the White. Okay, here we go. Captain man and the Danger Force charge out of the White House, carrying Joe Biden. Just as they reach the lawn, the White House explodes in chaotic fury eruption. Captain Man. That was a close one, team, but we did it. We saved Joe Biden. Joe Biden. And it's all thanks to the hard working men and women that we always know. And that's why they say the toothpaste is where the smile's at. Thanks, Captain Man.
Amanda
Oh, not sure.
Angela Giordani
Oh, my God, Shane. Captain Man. Don't think he even got the part right. Don't thank me. Thank Josie. Canonically played financial Giordana. Her acting truly brought this episode together.
Shane Topp
That's a laugh. That's a laugh.
Angela Giordani
Josie, played by Angela Giratana, appears. Josie. Oh, I shit myself.
Shane Topp
That's a laugh for me and you.
Angela Giordani
Is there another line there, Captain Man. Oh, Josie. Studio laughter. The end. Watermarked xylophone. Yeah, xylophone.
Amanda
I'm staying strong.
Shane Topp
Yeah. I mean, how cool is that?
Angela Giordani
Oh, you are Tom Brady. Ing this game in a huge way.
Amanda
What?
Angela Giordani
You're just winning play for them.
Amanda
I don't have.
Shane Topp
You're just winning play anymore at all.
Amanda
Yeah, yeah. He's going through a divorce.
Angela Giordani
Oh, my God. That was legendary.
Shane Topp
That's just. That's. You know, I found it.
Angela Giordani
I forgot that his name is Josie.
Shane Topp
I didn't.
Amanda
Who? Okay, who? Josie.
Shane Topp
Josie was the role. She played valet on Danger Force. If you were listening to the past 10 minutes of conversation.
Angela Giordani
Welcome back to the room.
Shane Topp
Welcome back to the smosh mouth.
Amanda
I went somewhere. I'm still rapping cor coins.
Angela Giordani
Holy.
Amanda
That was great.
Angela Giordani
I gladly give you all of those points.
Shane Topp
I. I know people watching were assuming that I was going to lose this horribly.
Amanda
Can we do a point check?
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Amanda
I see a lot of tick marks against my name, which is why I need to be really on it now.
Shane Topp
4, 5, 6.
Amanda
No more farts. No more farts, guys.
Shane Topp
All right, I'm just gonna. You're at 15. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Okay, Amanda, you are at 15. Angela, you're at 12. I'm at 7.
Amanda
Okay.
Angela Giordani
We should get him together.
Amanda
We got to get him.
Shane Topp
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. This isn't fair.
Angela Giordani
Should we do scene work or something? No, let's just talk. Let's just talk.
Shane Topp
Let's just. Let's just talk scene work.
Angela Giordani
Let's just talk. What do you have?
Shane Topp
Okay, what do we have? We. This is still a podcast and we.
Angela Giordani
No, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right, you're right.
Amanda
Sorry, sorry, sorry, guys. Never play charades with your mom. You know why?
Angela Giordani
Why?
Amanda
Because if one of the things is sushi burrito, she's always going to go like this to do burrito.
Shane Topp
That's fantastic. That's so good. That's really great.
Amanda
Not kidding.
Angela Giordani
Absolutely.
Amanda
My mom did this for, like, a full minute. She was like.
Shane Topp
That'S so awesome.
Angela Giordani
Too bad, RIP the podcast listeners. What?
Amanda
She's.
Angela Giordani
Why don't you explain, Shane?
Shane Topp
What she's doing is she's miming that eating a sushi burrito will make your mom look like she's sucking a fat dick. Got him.
Amanda
You got me?
Shane Topp
Got him. Yeah.
Amanda
Nice setup.
Angela Giordani
Got him.
Amanda
Nice setup.
Shane Topp
Good boy. That was a fucking carrot on a stick.
Amanda
Nice setup.
Shane Topp
Boo. Ah.
Angela Giordani
Got him.
Amanda
Bali.
Shane Topp
It's impressive. Straight up impressive. You knew that I would eventually make myself laugh.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
That.
Angela Giordani
We just got to get you to explain your own jokes.
Shane Topp
No, I wasn't explaining my own joke. I was explaining.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, or just explain what you find funny.
Amanda
But big fat dick.
Shane Topp
Oh, it. Almost gotcha.
Amanda
Oh, baby.
Shane Topp
Almost gotcha.
Angela Giordani
I think I'm getting lost in my phone. I just got present. In the moment.
Shane Topp
Yeah, let's just be in the moment. Let's just be in the moment.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Everything's cool. Just because I did a bunch of. Of research and found a bunch of script pages.
Angela Giordani
Just because you looked up my IMDb page.
Amanda
So where's my script?
Shane Topp
No, you know, I played.
Angela Giordani
He knew you'd fucking.
Shane Topp
Wasn't worried. I wasn't worried about you.
Amanda
I played.
Shane Topp
What did you play?
Amanda
I don't know. I've played things. I've. I've played Julia Roberts once in a student film.
Angela Giordani
You played in student film? You were Julia Roberts Played Julia Roberts.
Amanda
It was a student film. It was just a scene from Aaron Brockvich.
Shane Topp
That's you.
Angela Giordani
This is why he didn't have to write a scene.
Shane Topp
I was gonna say, it's Erin Brockovich.
Amanda
I was in a student film, and they were doing a scene from Erin Brockovich.
Shane Topp
Did you have to go in and out of that character? Like, do you have to go. Do you have to flip back and forth between Julia Roberts and Aaron Brockovich? Because she's like kind of a. That's like a character, right? There's like a voice to Erin Brockovich. Yeah, it's like, I'm Erin Brockovich.
Angela Giordani
Oh, that's not.
Shane Topp
I've never seen Erin Brockovich.
Amanda
Yeah, that's clear. She's not Southern whatsoever.
Angela Giordani
She is just like, I got two kids. I'm in a lawsuit.
Amanda
She's like, they're called Tits Bob.
Angela Giordani
I've got two of them. And you know what else? I have three. Three kids. Because he asked her for her phone number, and she's like, I got numbers. I got bills.
Shane Topp
For a second, I Thought she was about to say she has three tits.
Angela Giordani
And what?
Shane Topp
First for a split second there, it's like, I got tits. I got two of them and I got three of them. And I got four of them.
Amanda
She's.
Shane Topp
And I got five of them.
Amanda
Heads up. Not.
Shane Topp
And I got six of them.
Amanda
Heads up.
Shane Topp
And then she takes off her shirt and it's just like, like.
Angela Giordani
I will not get a point for woman with lots of tits. Will you?
Shane Topp
No, no.
Amanda
So I. She only had two tits in the student film.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Amanda
Thanks for asking. And I played Erin Brockovich.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Amanda
And it was very awkward.
Shane Topp
Very cool.
Amanda
The director was really awkward. He was a student.
Shane Topp
I would have guessed that. That's another point.
Amanda
I tried to do your facial expression.
Shane Topp
What's your facial expression?
Amanda
You do this thing with your eye that. You do this thing with your eyebrows. And I tried to do it.
Shane Topp
That is nowhere close.
Angela Giordani
This is it.
Shane Topp
What the hell are you doing?
Angela Giordani
This feels like I'm doing exactly what you do.
Amanda
No, no, no. Do your like you're like waitress in a small town face.
Angela Giordani
What?
Amanda
Do your.
Angela Giordani
Can I get you another refill of coffee?
Shane Topp
How do you do that? Does it hurt? No. When did you learn?
Amanda
Did you learn?
Shane Topp
Because I noticed you do. I've noticed it's a bit of a thing you do that when you go into certain characters.
Angela Giordani
Lately I've been doing a lot.
Shane Topp
Whenever you're just like. And then I. Lately I've been doing it a lot and. Oh yeah. Wow.
Angela Giordani
You look crazy.
Shane Topp
That's what you look like.
Amanda
Do it again.
Shane Topp
You'll do this thing where you're just like. And. Yeah, of course. And I. And I friggin take the pillow. I take the seat cushion.
Amanda
Shane, this is what you just looked like.
Shane Topp
And that's what Angela looks like.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Amanda
This is also what you look like.
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Shane Topp
Void where prohibited by law 21 + terms and conditions apply. Yeah.
Angela Giordani
Okay. What's the funniest?
Shane Topp
This is what you look like when you. When you do that. Yeah, yeah.
Amanda
Stop slamming the table Stop tapping the table.
Shane Topp
Stop it. Come on, Angela.
Angela Giordani
Once a dog jumped out of my car window when the dog. When the car was moving.
Shane Topp
Oh, my God. What?
Angela Giordani
See any.
Amanda
All my stories are sad as my.
Angela Giordani
Fuck all my stories. When I tell you something, it's just. When I tell Shane something, he just goes, what? Well, it's never funny. I know, but it's. Yeah. So I can't go stories. I can't go stories. I have to go.
Amanda
They're very funny to me.
Angela Giordani
I know, but I can't go stories.
Shane Topp
There's a dark humor to it. I get.
Angela Giordani
I know, but. But that's not how me.
Shane Topp
Just the initial thing.
Angela Giordani
I know. How do we make.
Amanda
What's your guy's name? Your shirt? Who's climbing to get that coconut?
Angela Giordani
Yeah, who's that? Who's that lousy little slut?
Shane Topp
God damn it.
Amanda
You know why I laughed? Cuz that one felt real. That's why I laughed.
Angela Giordani
There is one.
Amanda
Cuz it felt like you were bursting. And you. That was you. That's what it felt like.
Shane Topp
God damn it. I. Most of my points are from that fart machine. And I brought it and I'm using it.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Amanda
That little slut whore on your shirt.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Get out. I don't know. He's some guy. This is the shirt that Ian bought the same weekend as me, but he wears it in all sort of press things. So now it's very much like synonymous with him. Yeah, but this is my shirt.
Angela Giordani
That's how everyone feels about you with the lime shirt.
Shane Topp
Ian's shirt. I know the lime shirt, which I just. It was an Instagram ad. I'm like, oh, hell yeah, I get it. I like the shirt. I like how it fits. And now people just think that it's like my skin. They think that's who I am.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
The limes shirt. I'm like, I have other shirts. I wear other stuff. It's a good shirt, though.
Amanda
Let's find this shirt.
Shane Topp
It's good. You're gonna find that shirt and burn it.
Amanda
Yeah. You guys like the movie Old country for no Men? For old Men.
Angela Giordani
Fuck yeah.
Shane Topp
That got me. That got me. That got me. Okay, that's fine.
Amanda
Does my hair look like Javier Bodem? No, No.
Shane Topp
I told her, I. Angela. Angela, do you know. Oh, wow.
Amanda
That face. She just accept.
Angela Giordani
No, I did that face because I said.
Shane Topp
Did you tell her it's not Anton Shigur? But I told her she looks like the Berries and Cream guy, so. Wow.
Angela Giordani
You went from Lord Farquaad to Javier like Lord Farquaad. Lord Farquaad.
Shane Topp
Lord Farquaad.
Angela Giordani
Ford.
Shane Topp
No.
Amanda
Do you know the Berries and Cream guys?
Angela Giordani
Yes, I know who the berries. Don't talk to me like that.
Amanda
Like, I know the berries. Do you think I look like the Berries and Cream guy?
Angela Giordani
Do I think you know who he is?
Amanda
I don't know who he is. Do you think I look like him?
Shane Topp
She had never heard of the Berries and Cream guy. How weird is that?
Angela Giordani
What?
Amanda
And if I knew, I probably wouldn't have gotten this haircut.
Angela Giordani
No, I fear that you. You have been bullied for your haircut at this workplace too long. Like, I fear, like, we've been.
Shane Topp
Nobody at the workplace bullies her about it.
Angela Giordani
No, I feel that you.
Amanda
Shane.
Angela Giordani
No, you. I feel like you make fun of your haircut a lot.
Shane Topp
You make fun of yourself the most.
Angela Giordani
That's what I'm saying is you make.
Shane Topp
Fun of that barista at Starbucks makes fun of you. The one who said.
Angela Giordani
The one that called you Adam Sandler.
Shane Topp
Yeah, that was that one. That one's rough.
Amanda
He was very high.
Angela Giordani
But you were the one that. You're always like, my haircut looks like this. My haircut looks like this.
Amanda
You know why? I liked it at first, but now I'm in the awkward phase.
Shane Topp
No, you're not.
Angela Giordani
No, you're not.
Shane Topp
I'm in the awkward. I need to give. I need to get a haircut.
Angela Giordani
I'm in the awkward phase, guys.
Amanda
I'm okay. That I look like the Berries and Cream guy. That makes me laugh.
Shane Topp
He's a legend.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, he is a legend.
Shane Topp
He's pretty dope, I would say.
Amanda
When the guy called me Adam Sandler, that was a hard.
Shane Topp
That's pretty rough. That.
Amanda
And then he said cat in the.
Shane Topp
Hat at the end, and that made it better.
Angela Giordani
Someone said, I looked at somebody. I remember Chris. I know, but with this haircut.
Shane Topp
Oh.
Angela Giordani
Recently someone here said I look like. Not me.
Shane Topp
I don't know. I really don't know.
Amanda
How's your mustache doing?
Shane Topp
It's going. It's doing pretty good. Yeah, It's. It's. It's also in an awkward phase going.
Amanda
On in your pocket.
Shane Topp
But.
Amanda
Oh.
Shane Topp
For those listening, I have a little tiny comb and I'm combing my mustache.
Angela Giordani
I hope you listening are laughing harder than us seeing it.
Amanda
I have to stay strong.
Shane Topp
You know what's insane?
Amanda
I'm laughing so hard.
Shane Topp
This is a joke. But it's also not.
Angela Giordani
No, it's not.
Amanda
It does not look.
Angela Giordani
You didn't buy that for real?
Shane Topp
I didn't buy it. It was a gift.
Angela Giordani
Who gifted you that?
Shane Topp
A birthday gift?
Angela Giordani
No way.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Amanda
That's so fun.
Shane Topp
It's really great. It really.
Angela Giordani
Do you use it on your hair now? Yeah.
Amanda
Oh, it's gonna get stuck, and you're gonna lose some of the legs.
Angela Giordani
Oh, that's good.
Amanda
That's cute.
Angela Giordani
Now it's stuck in his hair. If you're listening.
Shane Topp
No, it's not stuck. I just left it there. It's put sort of a mustache. It's for. Mustache hairs are different than the hairs on my.
Amanda
Brush your hair and then brush your stash. You don't know what's in your think.
Shane Topp
What do you think?
Angela Giordani
You don't know.
Amanda
Lice.
Shane Topp
It's like, not have lice.
Angela Giordani
Do you guys wipe front to back? Back to front?
Amanda
Depends on if I took a poop or not.
Shane Topp
I'm only capable of one direction.
Angela Giordani
That's true.
Amanda
Good band.
Angela Giordani
Good band.
Shane Topp
So now, Angela.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. See if I have any hogs in the can here.
Shane Topp
We started this off with reading iCarly and. Oh, no, that was one of my first. That was my first job I booked out here.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
My first time with a studio. It wasn't a studio audience because Nickelodeon does, like, a weird thing where it's just the crew laughing. But I know your first job was two Broke Girls.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Which is so cool. Someone also pointed that out. Like, our fans really love to, like, share that stuff on Twitter, and I see those images and everything. And for one, I have a question. When you were on 2 Broke Girls, was it tough to determine which one was the blonde one and which one was the talented one?
Angela Giordani
Do you want to say it one more time?
Shane Topp
No. Because it's not going to make you laugh.
Angela Giordani
No. But I think it might make you laugh if you say it one more time.
Shane Topp
I'm not going to say it, but anyways, I have the script. I have the sides from the audition because I was. I auditioned for the same role.
Amanda
I didn't know he was doing any of this.
Shane Topp
I auditioned for the same role back in the day, back in 24.
Angela Giordani
Hipster number two.
Shane Topp
Yeah. For hipster number two. So could you. Would you mind reading that?
Angela Giordani
Oh, my God. Okay. You're bringing me on again, and I'm coming with a book.
Shane Topp
I told. I told. I know, I know. You could prepare stuff.
Angela Giordani
I know.
Amanda
I brought my journals, and I couldn't.
Shane Topp
You brought your journals? And then we both talked about it, and I was like, we're saving that for a different episode.
Amanda
Correct.
Shane Topp
Amanda has some insane journals from when she was a teenager.
Angela Giordani
Okay, okay, sure. But. I know, but I'm coming back with vengeance. Wait, read. Read the thing. No, that goes later. Interior, diner. Day two. Broke girls are busy working shifts and saying whatever dumb people like to eat up on network television.
Amanda
Laughed. Laughed.
Shane Topp
Wow, that was quick.
Angela Giordani
Oh, I have some stories after this that are gonna make you.
Shane Topp
Yeah, freaking see it.
Angela Giordani
Have you ever laughed so hard that you queefed your armpit?
Amanda
I can't queef your armpit.
Shane Topp
I'm.
Angela Giordani
I'm losing it now.
Shane Topp
Armpit.
Angela Giordani
I don't know.
Amanda
Remember when people used to.
Shane Topp
Yeah. Bart.
Angela Giordani
Hipster number two, who canonically is played by Angela Giratana. You spelled my last name right. Good job, idiot.
Shane Topp
Originally. Originally I had wrote it as Angela Giratanya Harding, and I changed.
Angela Giordani
You want to let me? I love a Tanya Harding joke. Why?
Shane Topp
I think you guys.
Amanda
Can she hurt someone's leg and career?
Shane Topp
I don't know. I'm just saying.
Angela Giordani
Take that back.
Shane Topp
I'm just saying. That got me. That got me What? Take that back.
Amanda
Keep getting him.
Angela Giordani
I don't know.
Shane Topp
And I got her.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. I said you can queef out of your armpit. I'm saying too. But you. Yeah.
Amanda
Why are you guys in competition?
Angela Giordani
Because. Because we're trying to make each other laugh.
Amanda
Well, I'm not.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, because you just lose so bad this game.
Shane Topp
You're at 18 points.
Angela Giordani
Okay. Hipster number two is canonically played by Angel Gerardana. Hipster number two. Does anyone. Does anyone know where we can get a coffee? Hipster number two then dies and is never seen again. The watermark says. And that's what I call that.
Amanda
And that's what I call that. That made me cry. Hey, what was.
Shane Topp
Sorry, I dropped my pen.
Angela Giordani
That's what I'm saying is maybe when I'm put on the spot, I like freak out. But like when I'm playing, when I. I can. I can make you laugh, but when I'm put on the spot, I'm gonna come back with vengeance. That's what I call that bitch. So in that show, in that cold open, I say. My line is, it was my first, like, television gig ever.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
And I say, there's nothing wrong with your vagina. I think your vagina is awesome.
Shane Topp
That's. That's a great line. Is that the only line you had for the audition?
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Holy shit. Those are the hardest auditions.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
You have one line. So much harder than like a full on crying scene and monologue.
Angela Giordani
Oh, yeah.
Shane Topp
The hardest shit is when your. Your one line is just like, sorry, I can't let you in.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Amanda
Oh, really? I love those one liners.
Angela Giordani
And they're really hard when you're on set because they say, like, even the triangle player on the orchestra is the most nervous because when you have the least work. When I'm on set and I have one job, one line, you're like, don't it up. Don't it up. Versus when you have, like, a lot of work or, like, a lot of lines.
Shane Topp
Yeah. You feel like you're like, so you.
Amanda
Can'T be here anymore. Get out.
Angela Giordani
And you're like, in your head.
Shane Topp
Being a guest star is. I'm not even trying to make you. Make you laugh. Being a guest star is some of the highest pressure.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Ever in. In acting because you come into a completely brand new set for yourself, but everyone there knows each other so well. They're a family.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
They. They have this rapport. There's inside jokes flying that you don't understand any of them. But you have a job to do. And if you mess up, it's like, oh, my God, I'm halting this production. That they all know how to do this thing.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
They're doing this every week. I come in here.
Angela Giordani
Yes.
Amanda
Like, the hardest job, though, is the background actors. Because if you watch them, they are really working very, very, very hard.
Shane Topp
I love.
Amanda
They are working.
Angela Giordani
They're working all.
Amanda
Sometimes all I'll do is watch the background actors because they'll be like, what's the Spider man one?
Shane Topp
They get into it. Oh, my God. Spider Man. Spider Man. It's. It's true. Are you.
Angela Giordani
No, no, no, no. It's doing the bit. Oh, my God, Spider Man.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Angela Giordani
But anyway, they said, I guess in the first cold opening. This is just a fun fact I learned, I guess season one, I guess they got a lot of flack for, like, using too much vagina. The word vagina. So then season two, they were like, it's the top of the cold open. Season one, season two. Let's use the word vagina as many times as we can.
Shane Topp
That's awesome. So I never. I never actually watched an episode of 2 Broke Girls.
Angela Giordani
Do you just talking shit?
Shane Topp
I'm just talking shit. I've never actually seen an episode. I'll be cool.
Angela Giordani
I mean, honestly, same, you know, no hate.
Amanda
It's fun.
Angela Giordani
Can I keep all those? The scripts?
Shane Topp
Sure you can. I will allow it.
Amanda
I have to stay really strong.
Angela Giordani
Okay, guys, what are we looking at here?
Shane Topp
You need to throw some fire our way, Amanda, because you are.
Angela Giordani
I do Think we kind of got you back in the game.
Shane Topp
Actually, Amanda, you are only two points behind Angela.
Angela Giordani
That's because you've bullied me this whole time, and I'm.
Shane Topp
I'm a few points ahead of you.
Angela Giordani
Came with a target on my back.
Shane Topp
I. Well, you know, Amanda talks up how much you won't laugh at things like that. You have the ability to not laugh.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Amanda
She goes to another place. She goes into, like, a portal. And she'll go, yeah.
Angela Giordani
And I could, but this was unheard of.
Shane Topp
Yeah. You know, so I pulled out all the stops. I mean, not even all the stops. I could have done more. I thought about writing more.
Amanda
Okay, here's one.
Angela Giordani
I'd have to have booked more.
Amanda
So my sister started dating.
Shane Topp
Booked a lot. Shut up.
Amanda
So my sister started dating an Irishman when I was a kid, like a teenager. And they're married now, but when they started dating, she started getting an Irish brogue all the time.
Shane Topp
She'd be like, a what?
Amanda
An Irish brogue. So she'd be like, oh, it's so good. Like, we went and we. I'm fucking up this Irish brogue right now. But she'd be like. She'd be like, what's Irish? Eugene Daily. Hold on, let me find it.
Shane Topp
What is happening right now?
Amanda
So she'd get an Irish bro. She'd be like, oh, yeah. Well, we went out and we went to get some coffee, and we parked the car. My sister from Boston.
Shane Topp
And I was like, that's pretty cool.
Amanda
And she'd be like, oh, yeah. It was so nice. Like, we did this really fun thing. Like, it was really good. Like, we. And I'd be like, I have a friend.
Angela Giordani
Like, this did happen.
Amanda
Yeah. So when. So I got her for Christmas, Banaka spray to help her improve her Irish accent. And she was, like, just beginning to date. She didn't forgive me until last year.
Shane Topp
Whoa.
Amanda
So about 20 years. She was like, fuck you, Amanda.
Shane Topp
Whoa. And I was like, why'd you give this to her?
Amanda
And it's. It's called Banaka Spray. To help you improve your Irish accent.
Shane Topp
I don't understand. How is it. It's a joke gift. Like. Yep.
Angela Giordani
Yeah. What is it? I don't get it.
Shane Topp
Baraka spray.
Amanda
This one didn't work out. This is real. This is real. It's called Banaka spray.
Angela Giordani
It makes you feel better. Sushi Burrito really kills Sushi Burrito.
Shane Topp
Fucking guys. Annihilated.
Amanda
Shut up.
Angela Giordani
Annihilated.
Shane Topp
That was your moment.
Amanda
Thanks, guys.
Shane Topp
You were Joe Montana first.
Angela Giordani
You were Joe Fucking Montana Banaka spray is.
Amanda
It's like. It's to help freshen your breath.
Shane Topp
Yeah.
Amanda
But they had a joke store. Really fun.
Angela Giordani
Cool.
Amanda
Very cool joke store that said, help improve your Irish accent. And that's what I gave her for Christmas. And it really disrupted our.
Shane Topp
That sounds like it really.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Destroyed things for a while. Yeah.
Angela Giordani
Trying to find.
Amanda
Yes. Angela and I have. Really sad.
Shane Topp
I'm going to. I'm going to definitely get a pack of that joke gum that shocks you. And I'm going to start offering that around the.
Amanda
Whoa.
Shane Topp
Also, could you not slam stuff on the table?
Amanda
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. Greg.
Shane Topp
Greg is so. You know who's. You know who's not laughing? Greg. Greg.
Angela Giordani
No, I got him. Once I heard something that I got.
Shane Topp
No, Greg is laughing.
Amanda
He was laughing as nothing else.
Shane Topp
Slamming your hands on the table.
Angela Giordani
Okay, I'm gonna find some video that's gonna slay you. It's gonna take you guys.
Amanda
Has anyone ever seen Stomp the Musical?
Angela Giordani
Yeah, I used to be in it.
Shane Topp
You what?
Angela Giordani
No. See, if I got points for every time I made you guys shocked, then I'd be winning.
Shane Topp
Oh, you'd be crushing it.
Amanda
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Shocking us non stop. I would believe you were in shock.
Angela Giordani
That's not comedy. It's not shocked.
Shane Topp
I would believe you.
Angela Giordani
Do you ever think you're a fake comedian? Sometimes I think I'm a misogynist.
Shane Topp
What is happen. What? That was several accusations in a row.
Angela Giordani
Didn't get a giggle at all.
Shane Topp
This is laughter.
Angela Giordani
No, I just smiled.
Amanda
Oh, she laughed. You are a misogynist for sure. Don't say that.
Angela Giordani
Got him.
Shane Topp
That was good. That was good. Holy crap.
Angela Giordani
Close to finding this.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Amanda
I mean, Angela is a misogynist.
Angela Giordani
Don't you have. You can't say that. I'm not.
Amanda
Angela's a misogynist. Men are so much funnier than women. Like, women suck ass. They do.
Angela Giordani
And if you laugh at that.
Amanda
Bro, I can't laugh at that.
Shane Topp
Well, see, if I laugh at it. If I laugh at it. If I laugh at that, it means I'm not taking it seriously. Seriously. Right.
Angela Giordani
So do you just feel that way sometimes?
Shane Topp
No.
Angela Giordani
Do you ever just take a. And you're like. While you're taking a. You're like, God.
Amanda
You ever take a poop and be like, wow, that's long.
Shane Topp
Why do you think.
Amanda
Do you ever take a poop.
Shane Topp
Why do you both think that poop jokes are what's gonna get me.
Angela Giordani
No.
Shane Topp
Made me laugh with.
Amanda
Have you ever?
Angela Giordani
Okay, no.
Amanda
And it's been from here to here. This size.
Shane Topp
Come on.
Amanda
And you've taken a picture of it.
Angela Giordani
Are you ever just cutting. Cutting onions or chives or, like, baking your cookies? And you're like, your cookies. He loves to bake. I bake cookies. And then you're like, God, your cookies suck dick.
Shane Topp
Honestly, that you got yourself with that.
Amanda
Your cookie.
Angela Giordani
Oh, he's pissed now.
Amanda
Shane, your cookies have never been good. You bring them in the office, and people laugh now. People go. People go, you got to try Shane's cookies.
Shane Topp
Yeah, that's what I thought.
Angela Giordani
It's a war field now.
Amanda
I thought that that would get shame, but I guess meanness doesn't work.
Shane Topp
No, no.
Amanda
Your cookies are great.
Shane Topp
I know.
Angela Giordani
Remember when Paul McCartney came in? He was like, the British are coming. The British are coming. When do you think he was like, do you think I have, like, a setup and I have nowhere to land with this? Do you think he was like, do you.
Shane Topp
It's okay.
Angela Giordani
I can't play this game. It fucks me up. It fucks me up, turns me around. It gets in my head.
Amanda
See, that's the thing, is TNTL does get in your head, and I totally get it.
Shane Topp
I think you guys are both. You're both. Just have fun, you know?
Amanda
I'm having a blast. I'm just trying to think of Poop Girl.
Shane Topp
It doesn't matter.
Angela Giordani
No.
Shane Topp
We established that whoever wins this gets a $20 gift card to wherever they want.
Angela Giordani
But you didn't even get it okayed.
Shane Topp
Well, I. It's fine.
Amanda
Mine's gonna be to Target.
Angela Giordani
I want it for Tilly's.
Shane Topp
Tilly's. Tilly's. What are you gonna get at Tilly's?
Angela Giordani
That's the funniest store I could have picked.
Amanda
You're laughing.
Shane Topp
That's laughter. That counts as laughter. I'm so sorry.
Amanda
I want to get it for Target or Talbots. I get a nice jacket.
Shane Topp
She has Key Candle Company.
Amanda
They're going out of business.
Shane Topp
Oh, no.
Amanda
And also, I think their candles.
Shane Topp
They suck. The Yankee Candle Company was always bad.
Amanda
Yeah. Too smelly.
Shane Topp
Too smelly.
Angela Giordani
What's the one? The beyond one?
Shane Topp
The store Bed, Bath and Beyond.
Angela Giordani
Not Beyond. No. The one with other bees. The blue one.
Shane Topp
What? There's another place with beyond in it.
Angela Giordani
Not beyond, but it's blue.
Shane Topp
Bath and Body Works.
Angela Giordani
Bath and Body works?
Shane Topp
Yeah. Okay. $20 gift card to Bath and Body Works is not bad.
Amanda
Absolutely not.
Angela Giordani
Absolutely.
Shane Topp
$20 gift card to McDonald's. Pretty good.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
It's five Happy Meals or four Happy Meals. I don't know. They keep raising the number.
Angela Giordani
Del. Taco.
Shane Topp
No, that's good. Taco.
Amanda
How many times are you getting Happy Meals, dude?
Shane Topp
I'm just saying, you could get four Happy Meals. You could spread that amongst your friends. You all have a Happy Meal. How awesome is that?
Angela Giordani
Okay, I can't find this video.
Shane Topp
Happy Meal's a nice appetizer.
Angela Giordani
Okay. I used to make videos to a toy. I used to make videos for my touchdown.
Shane Topp
That's so funny. That's so funny.
Amanda
A Happy Meal is a great appetizer. To a toy.
Angela Giordani
To a toy.
Shane Topp
To a toy.
Angela Giordani
I'm smiling.
Amanda
A Happy Meal is a great appetizer.
Angela Giordani
I'm not laughing at that.
Shane Topp
Come on. Saying that a Happy Meal is an appetizer to the toy is so fun.
Angela Giordani
That is really funny. On paper, like, it's funny. It's like a funny joke.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Angela Giordani
It's not gonna make me giggle.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Angela Giordani
I used to make videos for myself after the gym. I would feel so good about the gym.
Shane Topp
Oh, wow, we're getting vulnerable here.
Angela Giordani
I would feel so good about it, and I would want to remind myself about how good I felt about after the gym. But these workouts, it was like hit workouts, and they were too intense. And now I watch back of these videos, and I was like. I was not well.
Shane Topp
Okay, let's hear it.
Angela Giordani
To the gym. Just go. I'm telling you. Worth it. Go, go. Good.
Shane Topp
Holy.
Amanda
Why are you not showing me?
Angela Giordani
Hey, go to the gym. I swear to God.
Amanda
Go.
Angela Giordani
This is me from the other side. Go to the gym. It feels good, but no, it doesn't. Now go, go, go, go.
Amanda
I would.
Angela Giordani
I have so many of these saved on my phone. Hey. Go to the gym. Go to the gym. It feels really. Go, go, go.
Shane Topp
Go to the gym.
Angela Giordani
Rocky, you got to go to the gym. Go to the gym. It feels so good. I know it doesn't. I know you think the opposite. It's going to feel good. I swear to God. I saved all these for myself to watch.
Shane Topp
How many do you have?
Angela Giordani
A bunch.
Shane Topp
Holy.
Angela Giordani
Go to the gym. I'm telling you right now. I know you feel like.
Shane Topp
I always love how you have your mask down so you look like Abe Lincoln motivating you.
Angela Giordani
So good. In. In an hour, you're going to feel so good. Gordon Gym. Gordon Gym. You feel so good.
Amanda
Good.
Angela Giordani
Go to the gym. So good. My. Go to the gym.
Amanda
You sound like I don't even know.
Angela Giordani
Go to the gym.
Amanda
You're gonna feel so good.
Angela Giordani
You better go to the Gym.
Shane Topp
Do you ever do the thing where you've already set up the, like responses? So you're watching the video and you're like, ah, but I have so much work to do. And then in the video, you're going, I know you're gonna say, you got so much work to do.
Angela Giordani
Yep.
Shane Topp
But just do what you gotta do and go to the gym.
Angela Giordani
So many notes in my app. Notes in my. I know you had that with Tommy, but I have, like, lists that are talking to myself where I'm like, I know you want another drink. Don't do it. Or I'm like, that's real. But it was like, I know you want. I know you're gonna want, like, postmates when you get home. Don't do it. It's gonna feel so good. Go to the gym.
Shane Topp
Go to the gym.
Amanda
So good.
Shane Topp
It's gonna feel so good.
Angela Giordani
But that high you get from when you get back from the gym, you want to remember that.
Shane Topp
Yeah, man.
Amanda
I love the gym.
Shane Topp
I love gym.
Angela Giordani
We're giggling up a storm over here.
Amanda
Oh, I love Jim.
Angela Giordani
Oh, I love Jim. Can you guys crack elbows? Pam.
Amanda
Can you guys crack your elbows?
Angela Giordani
Pam.
Shane Topp
Sorry. What?
Angela Giordani
Pam, that's.
Shane Topp
Come on. He never says that.
Angela Giordani
He goes, pam, Pam, Pam. Can we go outside for a second?
Amanda
This is how you crack your elbow.
Shane Topp
You didn't. You literally didn't do it at all. Whoa. I can't do that at all.
Amanda
All right.
Shane Topp
I can't. I can't. I'm not. I'm not capable.
Amanda
All right.
Shane Topp
Whoa. Guys, I think I'm going to win this.
Angela Giordani
How many points are you at?
Shane Topp
So let's. Let's see really quick. So I have 13 points. You have 17. Amanda, you are at 21.
Angela Giordani
You don't know 13 to 17. We could do this.
Shane Topp
It's just four times. You just have to make me laugh four times.
Angela Giordani
Can you put the fart machine remote in the middle?
Shane Topp
You just took it. Look at her.
Amanda
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
Ready? So the pod can hear. I'll do it with a little sound. Honey.
Amanda
Yeah. Babe.
Shane Topp
This is. This is the worst content we've ever made on this show.
Angela Giordani
No. Yeah, we can't do that by far. You can't do this.
Amanda
Babe. Babe, I don't feel good.
Angela Giordani
You can't do this.
Shane Topp
Does that get you?
Amanda
No, babe, Babe, I really don't feel good. I don't feel good.
Shane Topp
We can't.
Angela Giordani
You can't do that.
Shane Topp
We cannot keep doing this. Amanda, you're about to make yourself laugh, babe.
Angela Giordani
You can't do that. You can't have to stop.
Amanda
I really don't feel.
Angela Giordani
I really love the new sign, you guys.
Shane Topp
Thank you so much.
Angela Giordani
Does she dance? Does she sing? Does she do a little fling?
Amanda
Guys, mine was going to kill. I would have had him on the Sick Girl.
Angela Giordani
He literally said, this is the worst content we've ever made.
Amanda
That's what you do. You keep going harder.
Angela Giordani
Says this is the worst they've ever seen on the show.
Amanda
Babe, I don't feel good.
Angela Giordani
Don't go back. Amanda.
Shane Topp
And she got herself.
Angela Giordani
She got herself.
Shane Topp
You know, it's just how it goes sometimes.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
And that's just the. That's just the deal.
Amanda
Listen, here's the thing about tntl. It opens up a portal of ideas. That's really all it is.
Angela Giordani
I really. It's. It's my favorite thing. During the audition for Smosh, it was my favorite, favorite thing you had to do tntl? Yeah. Killed it and.
Amanda
Are you serious? That's intense.
Angela Giordani
It's my favorite thing. I'm trying to pitch TNTL laser tag.
Amanda
Let's go.
Shane Topp
Okay, you got me.
Amanda
And what? Fine. I guess what is.
Shane Topp
What is.
Amanda
I guess Sick Girl doesn't work.
Shane Topp
What is t. What is. What is tntl? Laser tag.
Angela Giordani
Why don't you just think about it? What about tntl? Eat it or eat it?
Shane Topp
If you pitch it. No, what about you pitch it?
Amanda
You get what?
Shane Topp
You pitch it. You have to explain.
Angela Giordani
What about tntl? Chapter books?
Shane Topp
What? You got Amanda. Way to go. You got Amanda.
Angela Giordani
Okay, okay. What about. Okay, what about eater TNTL parade?
Shane Topp
Stop.
Amanda
You can't say it and then fart. It has to be a surprise. Everybody knows a fart.
Shane Topp
You have to be surprised. Sometimes that fart machine gives you a little treat.
Angela Giordani
Sometimes it's literally God. Sometimes God goes. Let me make it sound good.
Amanda
That fart machine.
Angela Giordani
Oh, no. Now he's entering, silly. Oh, shit.
Amanda
What's great about that fart machine is it'll go and then it'll stop and then it'll come in hot like.
Shane Topp
Fine.
Angela Giordani
Breathe.
Shane Topp
I'm okay. I'm okay. Yeah, I'm okay. The fart machine has no effect on me anymore.
Angela Giordani
Oh, whoa. That's your sound bite.
Shane Topp
What are you doing?
Angela Giordani
That's your soundbite Producers. Machine has no effect on me anymore. Now I'm clicking. I'm clicking and sticking.
Amanda
Fart.
Angela Giordani
Now you're imagining.
Shane Topp
Are you genuinely trying?
Amanda
I have to fart.
Shane Topp
Are you genuinely trying? No, I'm not going to genuinely try to fart on here. Stop it. This is so weird.
Amanda
Fart.
Shane Topp
What is happening.
Angela Giordani
We're so close. We only need like two more points and then we're solid.
Shane Topp
Yeah, but if you make yourselves laugh in the process.
Amanda
No, no, wait. Watch this. Watch this.
Angela Giordani
Don't overdo it. Don't overdo it. We have to rest it.
Amanda
You've been overdoing it.
Angela Giordani
Eat it or eat it. Try not to laugh. Reading.
Shane Topp
So you need to pitch the idea. You need to actually tell me what that idea is.
Angela Giordani
Okay. So I think it's so honestly. Laser tag. Eat it or eat it I think is great.
Shane Topp
What does that mean?
Angela Giordani
Running around and we have laser tag. Okay.
Shane Topp
Laser tag. Okay. This is a budget of 20,000.
Angela Giordani
No. Okay. We do fudgeing game stuff all the time with guns with laser tags.
Shane Topp
We're not running around. How is. We're like film it.
Angela Giordani
So don't. You got to be careful. We can't overdo it.
Shane Topp
You've already overdone it. Has it really?
Angela Giordani
We have like left and we're so close to sensitized. Shit. Shit.
Shane Topp
Really quick. You're at 17.
Angela Giordani
Shit.
Shane Topp
I.
Angela Giordani
How many do you have?
Shane Topp
I am at 14.
Amanda
Funniest.
Shane Topp
You need to make me laugh. No, that's a laugh for Angela.
Angela Giordani
I didn't laugh. That was Amanda.
Amanda
Haha.
Shane Topp
She wasn't laughing just then.
Amanda
No.
Shane Topp
Okay, guys, come on, guys.
Amanda
What makes you really, really laugh? Is it farts or is it telling stories or is it putting your whole fist in someone's juice? Let us know in the comments.
Shane Topp
Look.
Angela Giordani
Oh, he's on my fucking IMDb. You need to put him down like a dog.
Amanda
Should go on my IMDb and see how many student films I did.
Shane Topp
How was.
Angela Giordani
Don't you fucking dare. Don't you fucking dare. Why don't we do.
Amanda
Okay, it doesn't work if you do farts on your YouTube and I do farts.
Angela Giordani
I think we just needed a variety of farts because he knows the machine.
Shane Topp
You were. You were on ABC discovers.
Amanda
You just said Friday showcase.
Shane Topp
Yeah, yeah. How'd that showcase?
Angela Giordani
Why don't we just read all my credits while to these fart sounds and we'll see who dies first.
Shane Topp
What's the. What's.
Amanda
Why do you keep having a weird accent? You keep going.
Angela Giordani
We'll see.
Amanda
Farts.
Angela Giordani
Farts. Got it.
Shane Topp
All of us.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Shane Topp
Guys, I, I, I think yeah, you gotta call it. I think we gotta call it.
Amanda
Yeah, yeah, let's call it.
Angela Giordani
I just know that we almost. We almost got you.
Shane Topp
Let's call it. You didn't almost get me.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, we almost died, you and me.
Shane Topp
We almost tied.
Amanda
Whoa.
Angela Giordani
Okay.
Amanda
That sounded like a boot going through wood.
Angela Giordani
I did do the ABC Discover showcase. Thank you very much.
Shane Topp
All right, all right. Put the fart machine down.
Amanda
Okay.
Angela Giordani
Sorry. That was like. It's like giving a baby a bottle.
Amanda
So I am clearly the loser.
Angela Giordani
Yeah.
Amanda
With how many points?
Shane Topp
You had 20, 26 points.
Amanda
Okay.
Shane Topp
And Angela, you had 18 and I had 12. I had 15.
Angela Giordani
Fuck.
Amanda
Shit.
Shane Topp
Okay, so it was pretty close, but you guys did team up and try to.
Amanda
We became allies. So Shane is the winner.
Shane Topp
The winner.
Amanda
So he gets $20, hopefully to his choice.
Shane Topp
Yeah, I'm.
Amanda
Gosh. Which is where.
Angela Giordani
We have to stop it.
Shane Topp
We got to stop it.
Amanda
Never.
Angela Giordani
No, you have to. You have to.
Shane Topp
I don't know. I'm probably like. I don't freaking know. Freaking bukit a beppo. Why you get a nice lasagna.
Angela Giordani
$20. Nice.
Amanda
For $20, honey.
Angela Giordani
Go to Target.
Amanda
You can get candles forever.
Angela Giordani
Honestly, no, you're probably getting two candles.
Shane Topp
Getting two candles, tops.
Amanda
Yeah, it's better than lasagna.
Shane Topp
All right. Are we officially calling it guys?
Angela Giordani
This was so fun. Sorry, it got dirty.
Shane Topp
It did get dirty.
Amanda
Did it?
Shane Topp
It just got farty.
Angela Giordani
Yeah, it just got really farty.
Shane Topp
The way to go.
Amanda
You brought the fart machine?
Shane Topp
I brought the fart machine. I also brought scripts. I.
Angela Giordani
Look, I'm declaring a rematch if people want it, and I will.
Shane Topp
You know what? Okay, let's. Let's plan a rematch. Yeah, it'll be a. I'm not going to take this gift card. It'll be a $40 gift card next time.
Angela Giordani
Let's do it.
Shane Topp
That's fine.
Angela Giordani
Do it.
Shane Topp
That's fine.
Amanda
Okay.
Shane Topp
So confident that I'll win next time, too.
Angela Giordani
Oh, yeah.
Amanda
Then we all have to bring in something.
Shane Topp
I think.
Angela Giordani
I think what happened to me today is I did a lot of surprise laughs where I didn't. When I saw, like, the name Josie. Right. Like I saw surprises, I laughed.
Amanda
Yeah.
Angela Giordani
And you know what? I'm going to come to kill. Know what I mean? I'm going to like.
Shane Topp
Okay.
Amanda
And I laughed at the things that every American laughs at.
Angela Giordani
No, you.
Amanda
Our own jokes and farts. And that makes me a good person, relatable.
Shane Topp
Amanda loves Ohio comedy. Anyways.
Amanda
Ohio comedy.
Shane Topp
I don't know.
Angela Giordani
Donuts did. What was your donuts joke?
Shane Topp
I said, did people ever return the donuts after they'd used them? Okay, so.
Angela Giordani
So thank you guys for having me. This is so fun. And I can't wait for a rematch because I'm clearing it.
Amanda
Yeah, guys, we're gonna have a rematch with Angela Giordani.
Shane Topp
That's right, Angela Gira. Tanya Harding will be back, and we will do a rematch of this. I hope you enjoyed this. I hope you laughed because you were allowed to this whole time. We'll see you later.
Amanda
Bye.
Angela Giordani
You guys don't do that thing anymore? You ask me a question, you say, wrong answer.
Amanda
Yeah, you know, what's your favorite plant?
Shane Topp
What's your favorite plant?
Angela Giordani
A succulent.
Shane Topp
That's. That's not.
Amanda
That's stupid. And it's. Wrong answer.
Shane Topp
Wrong.
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Podcast Summary: Smosh Mouth – Episode #16: Try Not To Laugh: The Podcast w/ Angela Giarratana
Introduction
In the sixteenth episode of Smosh Mouth, released on October 9, 2023, the dynamic trio—Shayne Topp (Shane), Amanda Lehan-Canto (Amanda), and guest Angela Giarratana—embark on a hilarious challenge: the "Try Not To Laugh" game. Hosted by the energetic members of Smosh, this episode promises an engaging blend of personal anecdotes, spontaneous humor, and competitive banter.
1. Setting the Stage: The Try Not To Laugh Challenge
[00:55] Shane Topp: "We are doing Try not to Laugh the podcast today. The rules of that are simple. Very soon, once we yell start, we cannot laugh. If you laugh, you get a mark."
Shane introduces the premise: each participant must resist laughter while sharing funny stories or jokes. Each lapse results in a tally mark against the individual, with the ultimate winner receiving a $20 gift card of their choice. The competitive spirit is palpable from the outset, setting the tone for a spirited and laughter-filled session.
[01:19] Amanda: "Wherever we want."
The prize's flexibility adds an extra layer of motivation, as Amanda humorously suggests venues like Target could be potential winners' destinations.
2. Diving Into the Challenge: Stories and Laughter
Throughout the episode, Amanda and Angela share a series of personal stories aimed at cracking each other up, while Shane occasionally slips, adding to the entertainment.
A. Amanda's Fart Anecdote
[06:19] Amanda: "Have you guys ever been with a boyfriend and you farted and they asked if you farted and you say no... I think that's why we broke up."
Amanda recounts an embarrassing teenage moment where denying a fart led to a breakup. Her storytelling is candid and relatable, eliciting genuine reactions from her co-hosts.
[06:35] Shane Topp: "I'm trying to imagine what you're describing to me, Amanda. And I... I think I'm hearing like..."
Shane attempts to visualize the scenario, inadvertently providing more humor.
B. Angela's Cushion Mishap
[08:08] Angela Giarratana: "Once I was at a friend's house, and I perioded a little bit on this cushion through my jeans. This is disgusting. I'm sorry."
Angela shares a mortifying story about an accidental period leak on a friend's cushion, showcasing her vulnerability and humor. Her attempt to hide the mishap by leaving with the cushion only heightens the comedic element.
C. Amanda's Tampon-Surprise Incident
[19:19] Amanda: "I was at a friend's birthday hangout... I pick up a Sharpie and start writing, and it's a tampon applicator that's been used and it's black."
Amanda narrates a lunchtime blunder involving mistaking a tampon applicator for a Sharpie, leading to an awkward confrontation. Her detailed recounting ensures listeners are both horrified and amused.
[22:35] Shane Topp: "This only counts as one laugh, but holy shit."
Shane acknowledges the humor in Amanda's story, marking a tally against her.
3. Notable Quotes and Moments
Several standout moments punctuate the episode, each accompanied by laughter or gasps from the trio:
Mustache Musings:
[04:33] Amanda: "Like, what kind of mustache you have."
[05:02] Shane Topp: "There are mutual respect there."
Shane's contemplation of his mustache leads to a playful exchange about personal grooming and social interactions.
Shane's Script Reading:
[14:58] Angela Giarratana: "Hi, Carly. You're the comic relief. You stupid piece of shit."
Angela's dramatization of a scene from iCarly, based on a script Shane found, triggers laughter and adds a theatrical flair to the podcast.
Final Act: The Fart Machine Showdown
[65:02] Amanda: "So, you guys like the movie Old country for no Men? For old Men."
[66:08] Shane Topp: "Bali."
The introduction of a fart machine escalates the competition, with both Amanda and Angela striving to outdo each other in generating laughs. Their earnest yet comedic attempts push the boundaries of the challenge, culminating in Shane's playful declaration of victory.
4. Point Tally and Competitive Dynamics
As the episode progresses, the tally marks add an element of suspense:
Mid-Episode Highlights:
[31:24] The scores reflect the escalating competition, with Amanda leading slightly over Angela and Shane.
Final Scores:
[65:36] Amanda secures 21 points, Angela holds 18, and Shane trails with 15.
Despite their best efforts to suppress laughter, the trio's natural camaraderie and humorous anecdotes lead to numerous tally marks, with Amanda ultimately outpacing her peers.
5. Conclusion and Rematch Plans
In the episode's closing moments, the hosts reflect on the hilarious journey:
[66:45] Angela Giarratana: "Let's do it."
[66:47] Shane Topp: "That's fine. I think next time it'll be a $40 gift card."
Angela proposes a rematch, fueled by the fun and laughter of the current game. The suggestion is met with enthusiasm, signaling the continuation of their comedic competitions in future episodes.
[67:35] Amanda: "So he gets $20, hopefully to his choice."
Shane humorously contemplates his prize options, ranging from Target to Bath and Body Works, highlighting the lighthearted stakes of their challenge.
Insights and Dynamics
This episode underscores the strong chemistry between Shane, Amanda, and Angela. Their ability to share personal, often embarrassing stories while maintaining humor showcases their authenticity and relatability. The competitive yet friendly nature of the "Try Not To Laugh" game fosters an engaging environment, allowing listeners to connect with each host's unique sense of humor.
Overall Experience
Smosh Mouth's Try Not To Laugh episode with Angela Giarratana is a testament to the trio's comedic prowess and genuine interactions. From fart mishaps to mustache debates, the episode is rich with laughter-inducing moments, delightful storytelling, and the playful rivalry that keeps audiences entertained. Whether you're a longtime fan or a first-time listener, this episode offers a fun and engaging glimpse into the lighter side of Smosh's personality.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps
Shane Topp: "Everything after this is a means of trying to make the others laugh." [01:59]
Amanda: "Wherever we want." [01:19]
Angela Giarratana: "I have been dying to play any type of game where there is an actual prize." [01:26]
Shane Topp: "Don't be going out, out of here and going, 'That what they said. They said this like, no, we're joking.'" [02:12]
Angela Giarratana: "Once I was at a friend's house, and I perioded a little bit on this cushion through my jeans. This is disgusting. I'm sorry." [08:08]
Amanda: "Shut up." [04:03], [11:02], etc.
Shane Topp: "We got to stop it." [65:55]
These quotes encapsulate the episode's humorous and competitive spirit, highlighting key moments that defined the hosts' interactions.
Final Thoughts
Episode #16 of Smosh Mouth delivers on its promise of laughter and light-hearted competition. With Angela Giarratana's engaging participation and the hosts' relentless humor, listeners are treated to a memorable episode filled with relatable stories and spontaneous chuckles. The structured yet free-flowing format ensures that both regular listeners and newcomers can enjoy the comedic antics and friendly rivalry that define Smosh Mouth.