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Shane
Happy Holidays and welcome to Smosh Mouth. I'm Shane.
Chance
And I'm Amanda. And we are so happy to have you here. Cause it is Christmas day and we are here to chat about Christmas. And we have two special guests, Chance and Angela.
Shane
Hi.
Angela
How are you guys doing today?
Unknown
Hi. Merry Christmas.
Chance
Oh.
Shane
It is Christmas Day. If you are listening to this on the day that this drops. Yeah. And it's a good day. I hope you're having a good time because we are.
Chance
We're having a great day and we are all experiencing Christmas.
Angela
Yeah, that's true. Yes.
Chance
I've had a bucket of eggnog and.
Unknown
A bucket ready to go. A bucket.
Shane
Yeah.
Chance
Good night.
Shane
Okay. For starters, I love eggnog.
Chance
You do?
Unknown
I love it, like, the original way. God's intended way.
Shane
God's God's given.
Chance
Okay.
Unknown
Because there's, like, a lot of. Because since I feel like there's a lot of, like, fun ways. Trader Joe's has, like, an eggnog liqueur. That's fun.
Shane
That's weird.
Unknown
But it's not like, eggnog, eggnog liquor.
Angela
In my eggnog yeah, Eggnog.
Unknown
Eggnog is like, I've never put.
Shane
I've never successfully put liquor in egg.
Angela
Oh, I started.
Unknown
What do you think you're drinking? Like, eggs?
Shane
I drink eggnog. Yeah. Just full on.
Unknown
What is that? What?
Shane
I don't know.
Chance
It's literally whipped eggs.
Shane
Good.
Chance
And I don't know the rest.
Unknown
What do you know?
Shane
I actually don't, but it's delicious. We have our team currently working on this right now.
Unknown
Team of analysts are working very hard.
Angela
Cream and egg.
Chance
But is. I think that eggnog. Growing up, we always. Growing up when I. My grandparents would always put bourbon in it.
Angela
Yeah.
Chance
Or you could put Bailey's in it.
Angela
Oh, but that's so much cream already.
Unknown
When you're drinking it. Are you having it warm?
Shane
No, I would just get it out of the. I would just get it out of the fridge, pour myself, like a small glass of it, because you can't drink a ton of that. And I would just drink it.
Unknown
It's just like a milkshake in a carton, right? Yeah.
Angela
Bourbon. Then it's alcoholic.
Chance
Have you not had eggnog?
Unknown
I've had eggnog. Like, cocktails.
Shane
Yeah.
Unknown
An eggnog, like liqueur. Like, there's the Trader Joe's, one that always goes out. Me and my roommate grab immediately. It's like this eggnog liqueur thing that is so.
Chance
Well, they also make almond milk eggnog.
Shane
That sounds.
Chance
But if you have lactose issues, which I kind of do, I got almond milk eggnog, guys. I have a Christmas tree, and we got almond milk eggnog, and it was effing delicious to me.
Shane
That is.
Unknown
That is bizarre, saying. You have dairy issues, but you want eggnog. Where do you even begin? Just where, like, what is that? Just have a side of nutmeg. Yeah. Like, what do you. There's nothing you. There's nothing you can have that you like about it.
Chance
Listen, I have the milky drink in my hand, and it's not gonna make me shit my pants to death.
Unknown
No, you're right. You should be able to have it too. But it's so dairy.
Chance
It is so dairy.
Angela
I would trust an oat milk eggnog. Okay.
Chance
Oh, okay.
Angela
We like that. We don't like almond at that point, though.
Shane
If I have. If I have. If I can't have dairy, then I'm gonna drink the, like, hot cider. That's gonna be my.
Chance
Yeah, so is that. Are those, like, Christmas traditions for you guys? Eggnog, hot cider. Like, what are the Christmas drink traditions?
Unknown
Mold wine.
Shane
My mom loves to do the really thing.
Unknown
What is that?
Shane
Spiced wine.
Chance
And it's tea. Tea.
Unknown
So that's just wine.
Chance
What you can do tea and then red wine.
Unknown
So that's just red wine with, like a stick of cinnamon in it.
Shane
Yeah, my mom. My mom makes it, like, in the. In the crock pot.
Chance
Yeah.
Unknown
Yes.
Shane
And I. I think it's. I'm not like a red wine person, but the mulled wine, I'm just kind of like.
Unknown
Sounds like your family's doing pretty traditional.
Shane
My mom loves Christmas, and my grandma, she, like, Christmas was very stereotypical, like,'50s Christmas with the. All the same decorations. Like, they love to. To Christmas Eve was more like. Yeah, Just the. The vibes. But my mom recently wanted to get into the mold wine thing.
Chance
Mold wine?
Angela
Well, mulled wine, for some reason, the idea of it sits not right with me.
Chance
Well, yeah, it's. It's like, heated up.
Unknown
What did she do to you?
Angela
I think it's just like. Good question.
Shane
I don't love it.
Chance
Is that one of your. What's one of your drink traditions for Christmas?
Shane
Do you have vodka?
Angela
Yes.
Unknown
Straight?
Shane
Yes.
Angela
Vodka soda.
Chance
What? Isn't your drink tradition vodka soda on Christmas?
Angela
Yeah, 100% a vodka soda. She loves Bailey's.
Chance
Ours is definitely like gin, rosemary, cranberry and soda.
Shane
That sounds great.
Chance
And eggnog. So there's a cool thing that you can do. You can put cranberry, rosemary, and then freeze it.
Angela
Yes.
Chance
Make those ice cubes and then it.
Angela
Looks like a little tree in your cup.
Chance
Yes.
Unknown
That's very Pinterest. Your parents did that back in the day?
Chance
Fuck no, they did not. Yeah, my parents just.
Unknown
I was gonna say that's very 2005 Pinterest, girly.
Chance
No, no, my parents did. Well, we always had at my grandparents, so it was always eggnog and bourbon. Lots of wine. Like, we are just a wine. My family's always wine family. And then just a bottle of Bailey's if you want it. No, nothing really hot. We didn't really do mulled wine or hot cider or any of that shit.
Shane
We didn't have any drink traditions growing up, but my family doesn't really drink too much.
Unknown
But did you grow up in a cold climate?
Shane
No. Grew up in Arizona.
Unknown
Arizona, yeah. So it's crazy you had hot drinks, though.
Chance
No, we grew up in a cold climate. But the thing about east coast people is when it's freezing, we drink iced coffee. We're fucking weird. We like cold Things wild. Like, I was just there on the east coast in Southie, and it was so cold, and everyone got iced coffee. Even the cops. I don't know why.
Unknown
Even the cops.
Shane
Even the cops.
Chance
We don't like drinking hot shit unless it's, like, coffee or, like, later in the day. But we even have hot coffee in the summer.
Unknown
That's wild.
Chance
We just don't have hot cider or any of that. Except on Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is like hot cider, but Christmas.
Angela
Do you guys have traditions on Christmas Day?
Chance
Yes.
Angela
What do you do on Christmas Day? My family.
Unknown
We open the sock emboppers and we go to town.
Shane
Okay. Yeah. What was everyone's Christmas.
Angela
Yeah.
Chance
What's Christmas?
Shane
Because some people, I think, go hard on Christmas, and some people grow up in families where it's kind of like whatever it's. And that's fine.
Unknown
I was gonna say your mom is stacked.
Angela
It's like, you gotta go this place.
Chance
This place, this place, this place.
Unknown
Your mom is an inspiration. Because I think I want to be that way. I want my kids to be like, yeah, my mom takes this really seriously. Because I have a crazy thing that I do that I thought about this morning where I got my car, and I was like, oh, it's not December yet. Where once December starts, I lock myself in musically, and I will not let myself listen to anything but Christmas Carol.
Shane
You only listen to Christmas music through all the time.
Unknown
Once December starts, if I want to.
Angela
Listen to music, it's going to be.
Unknown
A type of Christmas music I will not let myself. And even this morning, I had, like, normal music playing, and I was like, doesn't feel right.
Chance
Yep.
Unknown
Really feels like I should be listening to Christmas.
Chance
I listened to Christmas music the moment I got my Christmas tree, and I was like, oh, no. That's what has begun.
Unknown
See, December 1st, I'm out.
Shane
Wow.
Angela
I think I'm usually day after Thanksgiving, but there's such a long period this year.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
That I'm like, I don't know if I can do five weeks.
Unknown
Yeah. I'm waiting so I don't go crazy.
Angela
Four weeks, definitely. I.
Shane
Growing up, I. I was obsessed with Christmas music. I was so stoked, in fact, I would want to listen to it before Thanksgiving, like, if it started to play on, like, one of those, you know, music channels on.
Unknown
Yeah.
Chance
Yes.
Unknown
Yes.
Shane
But as I've gotten older, I don't know, man. I think it's because they're the same Christmas songs every year, and I'm kind.
Angela
Of like, all right.
Chance
Yeah. There's some Remixes?
Unknown
Yeah.
Chance
Like Ariana Grant, I feel.
Angela
Absolutely Santa. Tell me is my favorite.
Shane
That one's good.
Unknown
I mean, I usually don't like you coming. She'll redo some.
Chance
I Love Faith Hell. Oh, the Grinch. The Grinch song. You know the Grinch song that she says?
Unknown
I was not expecting you to go. Ah, the Grinch song.
Chance
Oh, okay. So Christmas. So Christmas. Do you guys have any specific traditions on actual Christmas?
Unknown
Yeah, we were talking about that.
Chance
Other than music? Other than.
Angela
Other than opening presents? No.
Unknown
So Christmas Day, I have a weird family where my parents were the black sheep and moved out to California because my parents got it. My dad got a job out here when they just got married for Marvel. No, no, That's a rumor.
Chance
So.
Shane
So her dad's Stan Lee.
Unknown
Okay.
Angela
Oh, no.
Chance
All right.
Unknown
The only person that works for Marvel at this company is Rochel.
Angela
Please, for put.
Unknown
It's a Marsha movie now. So. So all of my family. All of most of my family is in Florida and in Miami. So every Christmas since I've been a kid, we go to Florida.
Chance
How did I not know that?
Unknown
Yeah, but then. But then my. My Italian grandmother, my dad's side, once we moved here, she moved here too, because she wanted to be with us. So at some point we were like, okay, we're gonna stay here for Christmas Eve to be with my grandma that lives here. And then Christmas Day, we're gonna open our gifts in the morning, and then we're gonna get on a plane.
Chance
Jesus.
Unknown
So we can be in Florida the rest of the day.
Chance
Was that enjoyable or you're doing it that.
Unknown
I mean, when we were little kids, I guess it worked out really well because we just, like, get on the plane, and I think it was cheaper for my parents to fly the day.
Chance
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Shane
Super cheap.
Unknown
And then ever since then, it was just, like, weirdly a fun tradition. It started where, like, we would, like, get on the plane and then show up, and then my. All of my cousins would pick us up from the airport. That's cute.
Chance
That's really cute.
Unknown
We go straight to the house and it was just like another present party.
Chance
Okay, that's really cute.
Unknown
Now it's. It's gotten. It's gotten old because you're still doing that. We're still doing it.
Shane
That sounds awful.
Unknown
Yeah, it's now old. And my brother and I will bring little shooters to the plane.
Chance
Wait, that sounds actually kind of fun.
Unknown
My brother and I will just be in LAX at 9am and it's empty.
Shane
You know what? I Love the airport. I love spending time.
Unknown
I think I've switched about your opinion on this four times.
Chance
You know what, that sounds really, really fun. Well, I feel like growing up, my tradition was like, it was very. Mine was like a five day event. Like, it was like Christmas Eve was very specific. We always went to, to a party, like my mom's good friend. And then we always did midnight mass. Always.
Angela
What's midnight mass?
Chance
Midnight mass is mass at midnight. Midnight, got it.
Angela
Mass is going to church.
Chance
Yeah, going to church. So we would do midnight mass and every single night, every. Every single Christmas Eve. And then you go to bed and then you wake up at like 5am.
Angela
Were the kids separated from the adults or were the adults in the same room as the kids?
Chance
So my mom was a children's liturgy teacher, so she would take the kids into a separate room.
Angela
What age was the divide at?
Chance
I don't know.
Shane
I feel like it's like 13, I.
Chance
Think when you're a teenager. Yeah. If you're like 14 or 15, you have to sit there.
Unknown
Wait, I'm on the edge of my seat. You got up again at 5am yeah.
Chance
We get up at like 5 or 6.
Shane
That sucks.
Chance
Growing for what? For Christmas, you guys.
Shane
Christmases suck.
Angela
So you open the presents.
Unknown
You're drinking hot dairy juice.
Shane
Yeah, yeah, I'm over here drinking hot dairy juice. And that's part of the way obligation. Meanwhile, you guys are waking up early to either travel across the country or, or go freaking listen to someone.
Chance
Christmas is not rest. The holidays in my family are not rest. They're actually like, it's fucking go time.
Unknown
Oh, this sounds like the east coast or anything.
Shane
It's a lot of people's holidays. It is not a lot of like religious families. Holidays are rest.
Chance
You wake up, you. You open your stocking, which always has clementines in it. Like my mom just covered it in fruit and then. And then like random shit.
Unknown
That's us with a salami. Yeah.
Chance
And then, and then you have a big breakfast and then you grandparents.
Shane
My Christmas. Oh, my Christmas is rocked. Okay. I was having the like classic. So ours was not like a religious Christmas. My mom is, is religious, but like, you know, so she would sometimes be like, yeah, and this is the day. And I'd be like, yeah, yeah, cool, cool, cool. Presents.
Unknown
We're the gifts.
Shane
But I was so as a kid, I legit believed in Santa, like hardcore. And I was, I was amped about it every year.
Unknown
Spoiler alert. If you believe in Santa, turn this off now.
Chance
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Correct. If you believe in Santa.
Shane
If you believe in Santa and your.
Chance
Kids are around watching, stop listening.
Shane
You're gonna be disappointed. But I would send the letter. I would be thinking about it all. All Christmas. I'd be listening to Christmas music all the time. I loved it.
Angela
If you're ever on the naughty list, did you ever not get presents?
Shane
No. No?
Chance
No.
Angela
Okay. I don't know.
Unknown
Would your parents do that to you?
Angela
No, but they would put coal in my brother's sometimes when he was really bad.
Shane
Whoa.
Unknown
They committed.
Angela
He would still get presents, but it'd be like, hey. Like, that's the whole point of it.
Shane
I know, but I can't. I didn't know any parents, actually. Yeah.
Angela
My parents aren't pussies. Don't put coal in your fucking stocking, bitch. They'd be like, if you act like you deserve coal, you're gonna get coal.
Unknown
It's actually so smart, to use the metaphor that society gave them what I'm jumping on. I'm like, why?
Angela
You're right. It's, like, there for a reason.
Unknown
It's the biggest report card of the year.
Shane
Is the biggest report card of the year.
Unknown
Why not use it and cash in?
Chance
Where do you get coal? Where do you buy. Get coal?
Shane
I mean, it's.
Angela
You can get at the grocery store.
Shane
You're from the East Coast. You don't know where to get coal.
Angela
You know, people, like, burn it to.
Unknown
Yeah, I don't know where to get it.
Chance
But that gets your shit all messy. Who puts that in?
Angela
And that's the point. Don't be getting. Don't be acting all naughty. You're gonna get.
Shane
Amanda's never grilled in her. So Christmas Eve night, we'd have, like, a nice dinner, family sort of thing. That'd be kind of it. Otherwise, we're not really doing anything crazy. But I would. I would go to bed and I would not sleep because I'm just like, yep, I could stop. And I'm serious.
Chance
Yep.
Shane
And I'm like, that's why we're up at 5. I remember looking out my window, trying to look up at the roof, being like, do I see. Yeah, Do I see it? Oh, I heard footprints last night. Now I'm stupid for believing in Santa because my parents were lazy about it. They were lazy about, like, doing the whole thing, you know, we'd set out the cookies and the milk for Santa, leave a little note. But my. I would wake up at, like, five in the morning, and I'd be, like, ready to go. And then I'd be kind of like peeking out, whatever. And then like, you know, 6 to 7. Sometimes I think it'd be like 7am and I would hear commotion. Cause my parents are wake up super early. And then my mom would be like, yeah, Santa's not done with.
Angela
That's hilarious.
Shane
Doing his stuff and looking back, I'm like, okay, got it.
Unknown
But you just ate that up.
Shane
But. But I'm like, you could have just like done it earlier in the night or whatever. But I'm like, you guys woke up and were like, all right, let's set up.
Chance
I think most parents did, you guys.
Shane
I think they do it.
Unknown
Oh, my mom's. My mom had a whole bottle. A bottle of Sauvignon blanc and would build the trampoline with my dad. And then they'd go to bed. You know, they would do it at night. Oh, yeah. Me and my brother once got trampoline.
Angela
Oh.
Shane
Every year we'd get a new trampoline. They would stack on top of each other.
Chance
So you guys all believed in Santa?
Angela
Yeah. Growing up.
Shane
Whoa, whoa. What the.
Chance
No, my finger just wanted to do this.
Unknown
Can I tell you my fingers up. I did not for too long. And I had a moment with my mom that's absolutely hilarious to me.
Chance
Where.
Unknown
There was one year where I like, I like, I was talking to her about Santa and I was talking to her about the mechanics of it. And I was young and I was like, I just like, you know, I was like, I don't wanna go to bed too late. Cause I wanna make sure we're like, not awake so he can come in and feel good about it. And then I was just like, but, you know, and I was like kind of second guessing it. And I remember my mom was on the toilet and like, she was in the bathroom and I was in her like, other. Her. Her. She was like in the small toilet room and I was in like her bathroom. Bathroom. And I was like, you know. And then she walks out of the bathroom and she looks at me and she has like eye contact with me. I went. And we just had this like deep eye contact. And I went, he's not real, is he? And she looked at me and she went, yeah, he's not real. It was literally just eye contact.
Angela
And I went, oh, my God.
Chance
How old were you?
Unknown
I don't know. But I remember being young and it was just the look she gave me. And I went, mm, got it. And then we never spoke of it again.
Shane
That's insane.
Chance
She was probably just like my job is done.
Shane
You guys had like an HBO level scene.
Unknown
Truly, I think my mom was just like, I'm done with this bullshit.
Chance
I actually love your mom for that.
Shane
I respect that.
Chance
My parents tried to keep up the Santa. I found out that Santa wasn't real when I literally was like. I was so investigative. Like, this is when Harriet the Spy movie came out. I was Harriet the Spy all over my house. Harriet, the whole Harriet the Spy. Remember that movie? Anyways, you're not a girl in the 90s, so I would like hide behind the couch and be like, today my mom is working on food and she's baking. Oh, no. So I was very investigative. So I remember like days before Christmas, I went up to my parents room and my dad wasn't there and my mom wasn't there and I was like, all right, what's going on in here? And I searched their closet and their closet was like another house. I swear to God. Their closet was like multiple apartments. I was like, woo. What?
Angela
This is naughty list behavior. This is naughty list behavior.
Chance
I opened her closet and I found a whole big stack of two, all my sister's names from Santa. And I was like. And I remember asking, I was like, mom, is Santa not real? And she was like, don't tell your sisters. And I was like, okay. Because my only my little sister believed it.
Shane
Honestly, that's probably. That's probably one of the best things you could have found when searching your parents closet as a kid. You could have been way worse. I feel, Ew. I just feel like. I don't know.
Chance
Yeah, I think I was. I think I was like kind of older. I think I was like.
Shane
I was like 17.
Chance
I think I was. Yeah, 21.
Shane
I saw Santa.
Angela
I saw him. So I don't know why you guys are talking like this because it's really Blasphemous.
Chance
Blasphemous.
Unknown
Blasphemous.
Angela
Honey. I saw my mom brought home books that I'd asked for and I saw them. Or I asked Santa.
Unknown
Of course you'd ask for books.
Chance
Fuck you.
Angela
And I saw them.
Shane
I would like four Bibles.
Angela
She forgot to put them away and they were on the counter in a bag. I still saw them, but I was like, I asked Santa for those. So why are you buying them, bitch? And then I got them from Santa, but I didn't say anything to my mom. And I kept it a secret for like two years because I didn't want her to know that I know. And I didn't want my little brothers and sisters to Know that. I knew. And so we had to keep it a secret.
Chance
Wow, you're good at, like, being like, everyone needs to be on the same page.
Angela
Needs to be on the same page, too.
Chance
That's really sweet. Where I was at, I was like, mom, we need to talk.
Shane
No, see, I. So I believed in him. And, like, I said my parents would be lazy in that way. And then. But then when I would. I asked my mom. My mom would not budge. No. She'd be like, she's same.
Angela
I would.
Shane
And I'm talking. She held on till I was, like, 15.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
And I'm like, mom, I know he's not. And she'd be like, well, I don't know. I think he's. I think he's real. And I think because I was the youngest, so I know she wanted to, like. But I'm also like, if you wanted me to really believe you, you should have really pulled out all the stops then. But you would be lazy. But then be like, yeah, no, but he's real.
Chance
We are so hard on our parents.
Shane
They would make Christmas great, and I didn't care. I would also be like, yeah, I know he's not real. Like, I still love Christmas.
Unknown
Okay. That is a beautiful Christmas movie with, like, Deborah Messing. A mom.
Shane
Oh, the mom.
Chance
Why Deborah?
Angela
Deborah. Mess.
Unknown
Okay. I met a casting director.
Angela
Whoa.
Chance
Okay, you're getting this.
Unknown
Let me pitch my movie. Let me pitch my movie, and you can cast her later.
Chance
Also, no.
Angela
Okay.
Chance
Better pitch her movie. Yes.
Angela
Okay.
Shane
Wait.
Chance
What if you.
Angela
We had a rule in my house. If you search for the presents, if you found the presents, you wouldn't get the presents.
Chance
Whoa, whoa.
Shane
Were cutthroat.
Unknown
Absolutely.
Angela
You're getting cold. What?
Chance
My parents had no boundaries. Okay? They still don't. They still.
Shane
I would purposefully not search because I think at a certain point, I knew, but I didn't want to. Like.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
So I was like. I was like, no, I have to believe. Because if you don't believe, then he's not real.
Unknown
100%.
Chance
Okay, Angela, pitch your movie because I'm dying.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Let's hear this.
Unknown
It's a mother whose last kid. So all the kids have, like, gone to college or growing up, and you. It's a kid that's 15, and it's like, you. You could play him. I'll put in a good word to casting.
Chance
Not sure about that.
Unknown
Yeah, they're. They're cutthroat. Okay. And so she's a woman, and she's like. She's very heavy. Heavy. Physical comedy woman. Okay. She's. She's a Julia Louis Dreyfus, I would say type. Okay. But I don't want to say anything for casting. And she's super sad. Her son is growing up and it's her last kid. And she's one of those types of stay at home moms where, like, that she doesn't. She doesn't. Her identity is being a mother. So now that her kids grow up and they don't need her anymore, she's freaking out. So it's this age where her son doesn't believe in. Is like. Doesn't believe in Santa anymore. And she's like, no, no, no, no, no. Santa's real. Santa's real. So the whole movie she's like, really making him believe in Santa. And she, like, gets a sleigh and gets all this and she goes out of control.
Chance
Tell me that she's divorced and she has a boyfriend that's, like a part of it.
Unknown
You got it.
Chance
And they. And they. They finally get closer because she's like, I need help, but I don't want to put this on you. And he's like, let me help you.
Unknown
And she's in full prosthetics as a Santa.
Shane
Whoa.
Unknown
And finally at the end, she's like, I can't do this. And he's like, mom, I'm not going anywhere. I love you.
Chance
Okay. I think. I don't know about Debra Messing, though.
Angela
I don't know about Debra Messing, but I'm in.
Shane
Yeah, yeah. Not Debra Messing, but otherwise. Good.
Unknown
Good.
Chance
Maybe. You know who's probably gonna steal that project is Reese Witherspoon.
Angela
You think so?
Unknown
I don't think she's. She's playing those roles.
Chance
Laura Linney. No, she's too big.
Angela
She's too big. Oh, I'm sorry.
Shane
Oh, you're getting cold. If, If. If you guys. If. If you had kids.
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
Would you like, you know. Yeah. Make them believe in Santa 100%. You let that. You let that go?
Chance
Absolutely. I would. I want to keep the magic alive.
Angela
I want to dress up. I want them to catch role play.
Unknown
You're like, making a DND for them.
Angela
Absolutely. A whole world.
Chance
You know what I won't do?
Angela
Roll for Persuasion.
Chance
I won't do that. Freaking creepy elf.
Shane
I won't do that.
Unknown
The stops.
Shane
Have you seen. Have you seen what some parents are doing?
Chance
If you guys, like, elf stop on.
Shane
Their face with marker, and they're like, look what the elf did. And the kid's like, oh, man.
Chance
My sister does elf on the shelf. And she by accidentally left it by the oven. And this Elf on the shelf fucking was deformed. Half its face was melted. And my sister went, elf on the Shelf is fucked. And she made her husband go out and get Elf on the Shelf. And I'm like, come on.
Shane
That's so funny.
Unknown
I thought it started as, like, a nonprofit.
Shane
I don't. I thought you just buy one of these elves and then you just hide it.
Chance
Every day you hide it, and if you touch the elf, then something bad happens.
Angela
Don't touch the elf.
Shane
What?
Angela
Never touch the elf.
Chance
Okay.
Angela
I want to pitch my movie now.
Chance
Okay. Is it Elf on the Shelf?
Angela
No, it's not Elf on the Shelf.
Chance
Okay.
Shane
That will be a horror movie soon, though.
Unknown
Yes.
Chance
Elf on the.
Angela
I don't. Can't believe it's not. Honestly.
Shane
Yeah.
Chance
Elf on the Shelf is terrible.
Unknown
And Deborah Messing tries to put her in the.
Angela
Oh, enough with Deborah Messing.
Chance
Can have Deborah Messing.
Unknown
Okay.
Shane
Really?
Unknown
Yeah.
Chance
She seems a little bit, like, stern, and I. I'm.
Angela
Hey, who's the elf?
Chance
Who's the elf?
Shane
I don't think anyone's the elf.
Unknown
I think of a. Lordy.
Shane
I don't. I. I think the elf is just. It's the little elf. I don't think anyone plays the elf.
Angela
The little elf.
Chance
Well, who's gonna voice the elf?
Angela
Thank you.
Chance
Not Jacob Elordi.
Angela
Not Jacob Elordi.
Chance
It has to be someone with, like, a weird little voice.
Angela
Oh, yeah.
Unknown
I'd love to throw my name in the hat.
Shane
Okay.
Angela
Yeah, Angela, let's hear it.
Unknown
I'm a little elf and a sheriff.
Angela
Okay.
Shane
Oh, yes.
Angela
I want to put my name in the ring, too.
Chance
Okay, go ahead, Chance. Oh, don't throw up. I have a little elf on the shelf. You're barely gonna be able to.
Unknown
Stole my wreath. Literally stole my choices.
Angela
Okay, fine, fine, fine.
Unknown
The exact same thing.
Chance
You just. Here's my elf on the shelf. Hey, you guys gonna go to bed or what's the deal?
Unknown
I have a question for you guys. Do you guys do presents for your friends?
Angela
Some of them.
Shane
Occasionally.
Chance
No.
Unknown
Because I get into this all the time because my. My love language is gift giving, and that shoots me in the foot financially because I am obsessed with buying gifts for people.
Chance
Can I tell you what you can do? Secret Santa. Me and my sister stopped buying gifts for each other. We now do Secret Santa. We pick our names out of the hat on, like, an Internet thing, and that's what I do with my friends.
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
I was gonna say, though, my favorite gifts at this point are like little, small, little things.
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
Things that cost less than $3 sometimes. Or sometimes my favorite things.
Chance
Yeah. Like a penny that's, like, flattened. That's what I wanted, actually.
Shane
I'm not kidding. If someone gave me that, I'd be like, hell, yeah. I don't know.
Angela
Then what do you do with it?
Shane
I don't know. Where does it go?
Chance
Trinket. Trinket drawer.
Angela
Like, trinket drawer.
Chance
I think you have to. I think. I think presents for friends is. Is too hard.
Shane
Unless you're get like a. A bottle of wine, which is still like. That adds up if you're getting that for a lot of people. I always say consumables are the best gifts. Consumables, candles, like, any sort of like. Like cheese, maybe a nice cheese or something, or. Or wine, something like that restaurant. Because that way there's no pressure on, like, knowing if they kept it. Like, if it's gone the next week and they re gifted it. You don't know if they drank it or not.
Chance
If the card is hard because then you know how much it is.
Shane
Yeah. Gift cards.
Chance
Ooh, $15.
Shane
I just don't. I don't know. I have no problem with gift cards, but I don't like to give gift cards. But if I receive a gift card, I don't. I'm stoked.
Unknown
Yeah.
Angela
I got a couple gifts already.
Shane
Really? I haven't started at all.
Angela
You got your gifts already?
Unknown
See, that's what annoys me.
Shane
You got us gifts?
Angela
Yeah.
Unknown
Now we have to get him one.
Angela
No, you don't.
Shane
Just so you know, it's. We're not recording this on Christmas Day, obviously, so I haven't started my Christmas shopping.
Chance
We don't.
Unknown
I mean, I. It's not Christmasy at all.
Chance
That's not how that works. Okay.
Shane
We have no Christmas decorations in here. I just realized.
Unknown
No, there's no.
Shane
We're not dressed for it.
Chance
So.
Unknown
Yeah, I think. No, I don't mean that. I didn't mean to say that was annoying. But it is, like. It is a weird territory. I think friends, like, within this age range walk where it's like. It's not like a known thing to get each other gifts. So it's like sometimes I have a friend that will get me a gift, and sometimes they won't. And then sometimes I fear. I see it in their eyes when I get them a gift, and they're like, I didn't get you something for Christmas. And then it's like this weird thing that's why?
Chance
Just don't do it unless it's like, a party or a hang and you know that there's gonna be gifts that are gonna be exchanged.
Angela
The only time I get people gifts is when I see something and I'm like, this deserves to be. I'm the same one, and I think I'm the person to give it to you.
Chance
That's good.
Angela
And you got us gifts because there was something? Yes.
Shane
Did you get us all the same thing?
Angela
No.
Shane
Wow.
Unknown
So you happen to be seeing something and you saw it for all. Something for all three of us.
Angela
You're not gonna guess it. Sorry.
Chance
All three of us are gonna like this. Oh, no. It's different. Different things.
Shane
I do like giving people gifts.
Unknown
I love it.
Shane
But it is tough because I'm the same way where I'm not gonna give someone a gift just to give them a gift. So bad at it. Only if I see something that, like.
Chance
Oh, yeah, I'm not a good gift. Gifts. Gifts are not my love language. Really? Like, I. I'd rather, like, do something for someone, but it's like, every year, and some of my sisters are just on it. They're like, all right, mom, dad, nieces, nephews.
Unknown
I'm obsessed.
Chance
And I'm just like, I can't. It's gift. I'd rather spend the money on a trip home to see them at a time that's opportune. Like, gift giving. It's just not. It's not my love language. I don't know.
Unknown
I don't know what it is. It's like. And I don't even like shopping. Like, I Like. You guys know me. I don't like buying stuff for me. I never online shop for me. I never go shopping for me. Like, all my clothes are still from. So many of my clothes are still from high school. Like, I just don't.
Chance
Yeah, that shirt is definitely from high school.
Unknown
Yeah. I wear this all the time. But it's like, I don't. I.
Angela
Oh, my God. Do not throw up.
Chance
Do not cry. Don't cry, and don't throw up.
Unknown
But buying somebody else something is just so fudgeing fun, because for some reason, it's. It's. It's just easier I.
Shane
If you. Especially if you nail it. If you see something. Like, last Christmas. Last Christmas, I saw a gift for my mom where I was like, oh, this is it. And I made. I made her tear up.
Unknown
Yeah. I mean, I was just.
Shane
I was like, let's fricking go.
Chance
Was it an aura frame?
Shane
It was Actually. So do you know those maple balls that I've made? Yes. So those are a recipe that my grandma made that was. It's. It's just like a family recipe thing. It's so easy to make, though. And I was able to get the recipe engraved on a cutting board, and so it's a little more decorative. It's not like a cutting board. You're gonna.
Unknown
That is.
Shane
But I got that for my mom, and she. Yeah, it was. It was.
Unknown
That is amazing.
Chance
What's the best gift you guys have given? Because that sounds like a really amazing.
Shane
I was. I was truly stoked on that.
Unknown
It's Truly, like, not even, like, a price thing. It's a thought thing that I think I love. And it's. I think it's like. It's like creative writing, but in the form of stuff. Right. Like. Like two years ago, I got my mom because we had a really rough year that year, and she was. And she was feeling really lonely, and I spent, I think, $15 because it was a rescue kitten. And I just got our kitten.
Shane
Oh, my gosh.
Chance
Truly.
Unknown
But it was the cheapest gift ever. But it was just a kitten.
Shane
We never. I always, as a kid, dreamed of that Christmas morning where you'd have a new pet.
Unknown
Yeah, I know.
Shane
Never happened. Truly.
Unknown
The coolest thing where I got to wrap up, like, a leash or whatever or, like, a collar. And she was like, what is this? It was actually so funny. I wrapped. I wrapped up a. A cat toy that was one of those cat toys with a ball around, like. Like a thing. And then it was so funny. It happened on tape where I was like, it's for anxiety.
Shane
Look.
Unknown
And she goes, this is so nice. And she kept playing with it, and I was like, it's supposed to calm you down. She kept playing with it, and she was trying to be so nice. She was like, interesting. Thank you, Angela.
Chance
Interesting. Thank you.
Shane
That classic. That old video of that kid unwrapping an avocado, and he's like, it's an avocado.
Angela
Thanks.
Chance
What about you? Did you give a really. The best gift?
Shane
Give or get.
Chance
Give or get.
Unknown
You cook good stuff around Christmas.
Angela
You cook good stuff around Christmas. Gift.
Shane
If someone baked me a pie, that would. I'd be.
Chance
Those are my gifts.
Angela
I usually have, like, a dinner party or something where I.
Unknown
Are there things you cook or bake?
Chance
Every year lately, Yes, I do thumbprint cookies.
Shane
Nice.
Chance
They're actually my favorite.
Angela
With, like, put your actual thumbprint on them.
Chance
I put my actual thumb, and I shove it in the cookie dough. And I do like strawberry jam or raspberry jam or, like, apricot jam. Jam. I do love to cook. Cooking is, like, my favorite thing.
Angela
Loaded mesh.
Chance
Is there a good gift that you got? I can't look at you right now.
Unknown
Hey, be nice.
Chance
I'm sorry. Chance is just playing with his hair.
Unknown
That's not.
Angela
It's just frizzy today.
Shane
For those listening, Chance is just playing with his hair right now.
Chance
Yeah. And he's really stroking his hair.
Unknown
What do you like to cook her at Christmas time?
Angela
Loaded mashed potato casserole is a must.
Unknown
What's in that?
Angela
Okay, so I use. My mom uses a lunch of sour cream, bacon, and cheddar cheese. I use Greek yogurt because I like the. It's lighter and healthier. And then I still do bacon, but I pour the bacon grease into the mashed potatoes and stir it up instead of, like, butter or some.
Unknown
And you're from a cold climate area, right?
Chance
What is this cold climate question?
Shane
I have.
Angela
We have. Nashville has all four seasons.
Unknown
Oh, Nashville.
Angela
A lot of times it'll. Shane. A lot of times it will. I'm trying to.
Shane
I don't think it had anything to do with it. I think it was coincidence. But when you were like, yeah, I like to do Greek yogurt because it's this and this and healthier, I swear.
Angela
And then baked Amanda, you were just.
Shane
Like, kind of like. Like, I don't think it was. I don't think. I think you were just thinking about something else. But I also. I had a. I had a voice in my head that was like, boo.
Angela
No. But I don't like the taste of sour cream, and I like the taste of Greek.
Unknown
When I go for a scoop of mashed potato casserole, I know I'm not getting anything.
Shane
I'm not trying to be healthy with a mashed potato casserole.
Angela
I'm not trying to be healthy. I'm trying to cut where I can cut, and I don't notice the difference between sour cream and Greek yogurt. And if it's gonna make a big difference in calories and fat, which it does, then I'm gonna cut it. If it's Christmas, I can't taste the difference. It's way healthier.
Shane
Boom.
Angela
Like, what are we doing right now?
Shane
I want the nastiest foods on Christmas.
Angela
And I'm putting rosemary, I'm putting sage, and I'm putting garlic, and I'm putting onion.
Shane
It does sound incredible.
Angela
And putting some paprika in For a little bit of spice.
Shane
Like, sounds great.
Angela
Oh, yeah.
Unknown
What do you guys eat? Like, some people eat like turkey and some people eat.
Shane
We do Thanksgiving dinner again.
Unknown
You do?
Shane
It's the exact.
Angela
Ours is a little different.
Chance
We do not touch turkey.
Unknown
What do you guys eat?
Shane
We used to ham family buffalo chicken. You're a hamly.
Chance
No. We used to do lamb with mint jelly.
Angela
What?
Chance
I love a lamb. Lamb with mint jelly, Spicy jelly, roast chicken. One hundo percent. And then we used to do pearl onion. Basically a pearl onion soup.
Shane
It all sounds great.
Chance
Kind of old school, but we do a baked ziti.
Shane
That makes sense.
Unknown
Just one big ass baked ziti.
Chance
And then we do a buckeo. Huh?
Shane
Huh?
Chance
Buckeo. We've been doing buckeo every year. Buckeo is salted cod. It's Portuguese.
Shane
Oh, cool.
Chance
So we'll have like a whole dish set up and it's. And my uncle's a fisherman, so he'll bring a bunch of smoked fish. And then bucke out is like. It's kind of a bit of an acquired taste, but some people love it. I just am used to it. It's literally very salted shredded cod.
Shane
Sounds awesome.
Chance
And you can put it on bread. You can put it on sweet bread, which is Portuguese. Like, I feel like Christmas is when a lot of the Portuguese traditions come out.
Shane
That's cool.
Chance
Yeah.
Angela
Christmas Eve, we would do steak and crab.
Chance
Oh, my God. But.
Angela
But my parents have cows, so the.
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Angela
Like they kill. Like they have full cows in there.
Shane
Whoa, whoa.
Angela
But I don't like steak.
Chance
Oh, I love steak.
Angela
So then I just eat the crab.
Shane
Okay.
Angela
And the load of mashed potato casserole. But then Christmas eat. Christmas Day, we do chicken and waffles.
Shane
I'm not hating on chicken and waffles. That sounds incredible. Incredible. I'm not. I'm not hating on my mom. And. And our cooking. Like, our cooking is just very standard, like spread. I'm jealous of all this insane that you guys are.
Chance
You Can. I mean, now that I. Now that I live on the West Coast, I literally am married to someone who eats Russian food. Basically, like, Jewish food.
Angela
Where do you get the lamb? That's.
Shane
That's basically.
Chance
The lamb is east coast. The lamb is east coast.
Angela
The lamb is east coast.
Chance
I do not eat lamb is lamb.
Angela
It's like, where do you get lamb?
Chance
The lamb is east coast. Coast. But here we'll have, like. He likes salted herring, which I'm not the biggest fan of.
Angela
Is that a bird?
Shane
No, it's a.
Chance
Herring is a fish.
Angela
Herring is a fish.
Chance
But it'll be, like, a lot of, like, pickles and, like, onions and beets. And he makes the most amazing dish where it's, like, really thinly sliced potatoes and then meat that you kind of hammer down. Flattened cheese, onion, tomatoes, and you put it in the oven, and it's layered. Ooh. I could literally have it for days. That sounds incredible. So good. Yeah. And they make cabbage wraps. Like, him and his mom are just phenomenal cooks.
Shane
No, see, I grew up in the household that had the. The canned cranberry.
Chance
Ah, yeah, that's.
Shane
That's the kind of food we're having.
Unknown
I'm having big ZD for Christmas Eve, but then Christmas Day, I'm meeting at lax, so.
Shane
Oh, that's true.
Angela
What do you eat at lax?
Chance
Yikes.
Unknown
We go to the Dunkin Donuts.
Angela
Okay.
Unknown
And we get a donut and a nice coffee.
Angela
You don't go to the Chili's, too? That's a mistake.
Chance
There's a Chili's at lax.
Angela
There's a Chili's, too.
Chance
There's.
Unknown
What do you mean? A Chili's. Chili's to go.
Angela
It's. No. There's a whole bar and everything. You can sit down.
Unknown
Oh, yeah.
Angela
I've never been to the Chili's at lax. You have not lived.
Unknown
It's the terminal you're at.
Chance
What airline are you going through? Because I've never seen a Chili's.
Unknown
I'm either at the different districts of Hunger Games. I've been there.
Chance
I've never been there. I love Southwest.
Angela
You have to go. It's always lit. It's always packed.
Chance
Terminal 4.
Angela
Terminal 4.
Shane
Let us know who is at the Chili's to meet up.
Unknown
Let's do a meet up. A smosh mouth meetup at the Chili's.
Shane
To have to buy plane tickets to go.
Chance
Where are we going?
Shane
Someone did do their birthday party at a Chili's at a. At an airport, and people had to buy tickets to go to The.
Angela
That is so much fun. That is so much fun.
Shane
It was a big deal.
Angela
You're gonna go on a trip this weekend. It's my birthday. You have to meet me at a Chili's too. Before you go where?
Unknown
Didn't someone talk about doing that with a Waffle House here? Was that you?
Shane
Are there waffle houses?
Unknown
No, no, but we were talking about, like, going. Getting a flight to go to a Waffle house.
Angela
Oh, God, I want to do that.
Shane
Chicken and waffles on Christmas day, though.
Chance
I was just gonna say chicken and waffles.
Shane
I friggin love chicken and waffles.
Angela
Me too.
Chance
I don't know what I'm gonna do this Christmas because I'm here on the west coast. Probably just a bunch of Russian food.
Unknown
Fun.
Chance
So good. The only thing is Russian food is I'm not used to it because it's so much sour cream. I can't help you.
Angela
Kidding.
Chance
Oh, I'm dead. I'm dead serious. My husband lives and dies by sour cream.
Unknown
That's so funny.
Chance
I call him Dairy Queen because he loves dairy.
Unknown
One of my best friends. One of my best friends in middle school, we had. I remember I came over to her house after school in middle school, and we had ravioli. And I was like, yes, I love ravioli. And she put a huge scoop of sour cream on top of it. And I went, whoa. Never seen this before.
Angela
It wasn't ricotta?
Unknown
No.
Angela
It wasn't Mascarpone?
Chance
No, no, no.
Unknown
It was sour cream.
Chance
Yummy.
Shane
God dang.
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
We really love talking about food and drink on this episode.
Chance
Okay.
Angela
Because it's so hot.
Shane
That is a lot of Christmas.
Chance
But also what's very Christmas, see for me is movies, like, very traditional. You watch the same movies every year.
Angela
Oh, not my family. Oh, we're watching the biggest block. We love to watch the biggest blockbuster. Oh, really? Even if it's like. Well, it's what comes out on Christmas.
Unknown
I mean, a lot of movies come out Christmas day.
Shane
Oh, so you guys go to the theater?
Angela
We go to the theater around that time. But on the actual day, we'll watch whatever the biggest one is that's just getting released. Like, we watched Black Adam last year.
Chance
Oh, God, Black Adam.
Angela
And my whole family is like, let's watch. Well, we also love superhero things.
Shane
Oh, you're all into it. We're all into it.
Angela
Even my mom is, like, crying. She's like, did you like Loki? I'm like, yeah, I like.
Shane
Oh, see, my parents are not into that at all. My. My mom Every year she's just like, oh, it's a Wonderful Life.
Unknown
Oh, my God.
Shane
And. And it's like. And like, nobody else is gonna watch it with her. But sometimes I'll be like, all right, I'll see.
Chance
Ours is a Christmas story. I can't fucking stand that in your eye.
Shane
Really, It's. It plays just non stop. You're gonna end up watching that movie whether you like it or not.
Chance
Growing up, we were so annoyed.
Angela
There's the one part that's annoying.
Unknown
Ours is the Christmas episode of West Wing.
Chance
What?
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
That's the most insane thing I think I've ever heard.
Unknown
Watch it a lot.
Chance
What?
Unknown
Or we watch the Christmas compilation episode of snl. Oh, my family loves ours.
Chance
Is the Grinch Love.
Shane
Actually, I love the Grinch.
Unknown
I love. That's my favorite movie in the world.
Shane
Wait, okay, okay, hold. Whoa.
Unknown
That's the one Christmas thing you brought.
Chance
But yeah, Chance is wearing Grinch socks, and they are amazing.
Unknown
That is, I will say, the Ron Howard Christmas.
Chance
How.
Unknown
How the Grinch told Christmas. That's the.
Chance
Is that the Jim Carrey one?
Shane
Yes.
Unknown
Is my favorite, but besides Christmas movies, I think it's top 10. One of my favorite movies in the world.
Angela
Wow.
Unknown
It is beautiful.
Chance
It's beautiful.
Angela
Don't say you've never seen it.
Shane
I have seen. I haven't seen it since I saw it in theaters.
Angela
Oh, my God.
Shane
Oh, I remember.
Angela
Not like Shane. You can't even say that. You can't even say that.
Shane
It was like, I love it when I saw it in theater.
Unknown
I know you, and I know the comedy genius you are. You could take that. You could take that. I just give you a compliment, and I think if you rewatch it right now. No, but I think if you rewatch it right now, there are so many hidden gems for adults in there that are brilliant jokes.
Chance
So funny.
Unknown
Max. A car would have paid for itself by now.
Angela
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Back to my pitch. Back to my pitch.
Chance
Oh, yeah.
Angela
Movie pitch. Back to my pitch.
Chance
Movie pitch.
Angela
Okay. It's a sequel to the Grinch. Cindy Lou is grown up. The Grinch is gone now. Cindy Lou, who is grown up, I.
Unknown
Just hit her for her.
Angela
The Grinch is gone now. She's looking for love. She's looking for love, but she keeps trying to.
Unknown
She's a slut.
Chance
She.
Angela
She just, like, gets people over. Then she wants people to put on a Grinch mask.
Chance
Oh, my God. So she has a Grinch.
Shane
I like how this movie is just an episode of Seinfeld.
Chance
Cindy Lulu has a Grinch fetish. So she's looking for love, George.
Unknown
She wants me to put this.
Angela
She's trying. She's like, fuck, this is my king.
Chance
Wait, is it a whore or a thriller?
Angela
No, I think it's like. I don't know what it is.
Chance
So she gets, she gets met alone. Almost like promising young woman. And she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. She's like, hey, throw on this mask. I'm like, okay. And they put on the mask and then she goes throw on the bodysuit. And they have to put on the Jim Carrey bodysuit.
Angela
It's the actress who played Cindy Lou. Who? Oh, that's crazy.
Chance
Where is she now?
Angela
Where is she now? What does she look like?
Unknown
Christine Baranski's performance in that movie.
Angela
Yes.
Unknown
Is legend.
Chance
My sister was her for Halloween.
Shane
Just said I am clearly the only person in this room where she's like, hi.
Chance
So my sister and my brother in law were them for Halloween this year.
Shane
Wow.
Chance
And my sister. But he looked insane. Insane. Cuz remember it's the big ass eyebrows. Was it Jeffrey Tambor?
Unknown
Yes, I think so. I wish we five night at Freddy do and made it look like it was a real story. But you would have known what?
Chance
Yeah, there's a real story about this green guy.
Shane
Yeah, I know the Grinch. I've seen this. The animated one is the one I liked as a kid.
Unknown
See, I think you as a comedian. Yeah. It's just so good.
Shane
I, I know everything about it too. I know that he, he had to go through CIA torture training to. In order to do that role. Because it was so CIA torture training. Yes, because the, the. The makeup was so intense and it was nine hours putting it on every.
Unknown
Day and dinner with myself. I can't cancel that again.
Shane
Yeah, no. Growing up and still Home Alone is number one. I don't think any Christmas movie is better than Home Alone.
Angela
Elf.
Shane
Joe Pesci Elf is funnier. But Home Alone is overall a better movie. Home Alone is I think a perfect movie.
Chance
And Die Hard.
Angela
Die Hard, I get they're the same movie. You said the same thing twice.
Shane
Can say Die Hard is a Christmas movie. I don't have a problem with that. I don't think it's a fun movie to watch on Christmas.
Chance
I love it on Christmas.
Angela
I'd rather watch the Polar Express.
Shane
I do not like that one.
Chance
Whoa.
Unknown
You know what I think is a Christmas movie? Oh, whoa, whoa. Polar Express. We have hate for Polar Express.
Shane
That movie.
Chance
That movie's so weird. I do not like that movie is nightmare. The book is great, but the movie sucks.
Shane
Yeah, I agree. I agree.
Angela
Do you love it?
Chance
Is this.
Angela
I love the polar expression. The hot cocoa scene alone.
Unknown
Oh, Tom Hanks came to slay.
Angela
He did. You know how many people he voice? He also voices the little black girl. I don't know if you knew that.
Chance
No, stop.
Shane
You could have. You could have gotten us.
Chance
Tom Cruise voices the black girl in Polar Express.
Shane
Tom Hanks.
Angela
It's true.
Chance
Tom Hanks.
Shane
Tom Cruise is in it and he just plays that role.
Chance
Tom Cruise has a special appearance of playing the black girl in Polar Express.
Angela
Talented. He is. Say what you will, but he is.
Shane
He really went against type on that one.
Unknown
I went to go see the Polar Express in theaters and I remember it was the day I got my Live Strong bracelet.
Shane
Yes, see, that's a mistake.
Chance
That's why that movie sucks, because we.
Angela
Took a field trip to go see it. Oh, it was.
Unknown
It was amazing. You guys have to appreciate the Christmas movies that come out now because they are going against all of nostalgia. They. They are. They are pushing. It is so hard for them. Also, side note, you know what else is a Christmas movie? Goodfellas.
Angela
What?
Chance
Goodfellas is such a Christmas movie, but I cannot rewatch that. So it's just, just too.
Shane
I want to watch an uplifting movie. I want to watch an uplifting movie on Christmas day.
Chance
I want to watch. But Home Alone.
Shane
It's uplifting. The end. The end makes me cry every time. When he looks out the window and the neighbors hugging his son. I'm always just like, God dang. Like, I love that. So as a kid it didn't make me cry cuz I didn't give a. About the neighbor and his son. I'd be like, this guy, you got to go beat up those burglars.
Unknown
Yeah.
Shane
Now as an adult, when I hear the whole like him at the church and he's talking, he's just like, yeah, don't talk to my son anymore. Like I don't talk to my daughter anymore. And he's like, differences, whatever. And then you see at the end, they reconcile.
Chance
They reconcile. So sweet.
Shane
It's about family and it's got multiple levels of it.
Angela
Yeah. That look when she comes in the door and sees him.
Chance
It's so sweet.
Unknown
Oh, you know what movie my brother and I are obsessed with growing up was Christmas with the Cranks.
Chance
Never seen it.
Unknown
Oh my God.
Chance
Who's in that?
Unknown
It's. Wait, who are the actors? It's the guy who plays Santa Claus and oh, Tim Allen and the girl in the Activia commercials.
Chance
Jamie Lee Curtis.
Unknown
Jamie Lee Curtis. Okay. They get these crazy tans because they're like. We're. We're. It's okay. I'm not gonna explain a movie you haven't seen anyway. Nobody wants to listen to a podcast of a girl explaining a movie.
Shane
You guys.
Chance
Yeah, I do.
Angela
Y'all remember?
Shane
I don't know.
Unknown
They're.
Shane
They're describing premises of every Christmas movie.
Angela
You know what was super influential to my childhood was the Christmas episode of Code Name Kids Next Door.
Shane
Okay.
Angela
And the whole.
Chance
I don't even know what this is.
Angela
Codename Kids Next Door.
Unknown
But also, that's a fun topic is episode. Christmas episodes.
Shane
Yeah.
Chance
So what is the episode about?
Angela
It's like they go to the North Pole.
Unknown
I tried him.
Chance
Oh, is he making this up?
Angela
No, no, no.
Shane
It was a real show.
Angela
It was a real show. But their Christmas special was bonkers. They were like. It was like, they went to the North Pole to save him, but they were like, also X Men Coded, so there was Wolverine with like, stop. You're so mad at it.
Chance
No, I just. It's so crazy. It's like when I watched Krampus. Did you guys ever see Krampus?
Angela
No.
Chance
Yeah. What?
Shane
No.
Chance
It's a Christmas horror movie. It's about Krampus. That's probably why it is, and it's insane. Me and my sister watched it.
Angela
It's Santa Claus, the bad guy. Or is there something else?
Chance
No, there's something else, and it's Krampus, and he's a demon.
Angela
Oh, he's.
Chance
He's a Christmas.
Angela
Does he give people gifts, though?
Unknown
I need a Sarah Christmas movie.
Chance
He does not give.
Unknown
She's like, ah, this Christmas time.
Angela
Yeah.
Chance
Yeah. Let me pitch my Christmas movie with Sarah. Christ. Sarah Christmas. I kind of want her to find love at the end, but. And the guy's like, I got you a little gift. And she's like, shut the fuck up. She, like, slaps him across. But I kind of want. It's Sarah Crace, and I kind of want that Home Alone moment where she reconciles with her daughter, but she's on the search for a killer, of course. And it's the Creekside Killer.
Unknown
Wait, I know how the trailer ends. You zoom out, and it's a snow globe. And on the edge of the snow globe, it's this woman walking, smoking, going, I don't know how to get out of here. Yes.
Chance
Wait, that's brilliant. She's outside of the snow globe.
Unknown
She's on the edge of it just being like, I don't know how to get out.
Chance
I don't know how to get out of here. The Creekside Killer is just on the thing and it's just her in her own snow globe searching for the Creekside Killer. God, that is so perfect just to get out.
Shane
My Christmas movie would be a combination of Snowpiercer and Polar Express.
Unknown
Oh, so now you love Polar Express?
Shane
No, but that. That combo I'd like. No, I like.
Angela
You have to get through the train.
Shane
I like the story of let's going back really quick. I like the story of Polar Express. I. The animation and everything in that movie tripped me.
Chance
That too. I did not like the animation.
Shane
And there's that one kid who's annoying as with the glasses. I'm like. I get. Kick him off the train, throw him out into the cold. Let me see him freeze to death. I hate this. Otherwise it's fine.
Unknown
That theme, the choir theme in the song. Anyway, keep going.
Shane
Yeah, the music's great. The eyes are dead.
Unknown
Yeah. Yeah.
Chance
The animation, really.
Angela
The eyes are dead.
Shane
The eyes are so dead. I can't get into it.
Chance
Which reminds me of the. Remember that animation back in the day? What was it? Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Yeah, Claymation. What is that movie called?
Shane
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Okay, thank you.
Angela
We talked about it. The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus. The one where he fights dragons.
Unknown
Yes.
Shane
That one's nuts.
Angela
That one's nuts.
Shane
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer was another staple in my house.
Chance
And the Claymation of the Abominable Snowman.
Shane
Oh, yeah.
Chance
That was terrifying.
Shane
Bumble's Bounce.
Chance
Whoa.
Angela
You know who's kind of cute?
Shane
Yukon Cornelius Man.
Angela
Mr. Heat Miserty. Wait, yeah.
Chance
Who's that again?
Angela
The Heat Miser.
Unknown
In that?
Shane
It's in the Life and Adventures of Santa Claus.
Angela
Oh, is that. It's not in Rudolph.
Shane
It's not in Rudolph.
Chance
I've never.
Shane
Rudolph has. It has Rudolph. It has the elf who Wants to be a Dentist.
Chance
Yes.
Shane
It has Yukon Cornelius and then it has the Burl Ives Snowman.
Chance
Did you just recently watch it?
Shane
No, I just. I've watched that movie so many times. That's got everything. It's got skinny Santa where Mrs. Claus is like. Is like eat Santa. Yeah.
Unknown
Oh, my.
Shane
Skinny Santa.
Unknown
Oh, my God.
Chance
That Claymation really freaked me out. I think that's why I didn't watch it a bunch. But.
Unknown
No, it freaked me out too, as a kid.
Chance
But then we watched the Snow Queen. Ever seen the Snow Queen? It's really Old school. Like, we had it on VHS. It's, like, from the 70s. Whoa. It's called the Snow Queen. You've never heard the story of the Snow Queen?
Shane
I know the story.
Chance
It's like two kids who are stolen from their home. And then the Snow Queen lives in this castle and she's, like, flying through space. It's an old movie.
Angela
Frozen.
Chance
I had a bunch of older siblings that I watched. Whatever.
Shane
Yeah, I feel like a lot of people end up watching some weird ass on Christmas.
Unknown
Was there a Christmas spongebob episode?
Shane
There's a Christmas everything episode. I feel like.
Unknown
But was there one for spongebob?
Shane
There's got to be. Yeah, there's got to be. I would watch the Johnny Bravo Christmas episode. I would watch Cartoon Network and whatever Christmas episode was on.
Unknown
That's what I love about Christmas. Is that the. There's an episode for.
Shane
Oh, yeah.
Unknown
Incredible.
Shane
I'd watch.
Unknown
What's your Christmas movie?
Shane
I mean, Home Alone.
Unknown
Oh, yeah, you said Home Alone is. No, but the one that you were gonna pitch. It's the.
Chance
It's.
Shane
Oh, Polar Express and Snowpiercer. Okay, so it's. It's Polar Express, but it's been running for so long, and now it's the only thing where people can live on. On. On the earth. I love that everything else is frozen over, so you have to survive on the Polar Express.
Angela
There was chocolate. There was one show where Santa Claus was the. Was a constant bad guy and I can't remember what it was. They would, like, always fight Santa Claus.
Shane
That's awesome.
Chance
Right in the comments. Who would, like.
Angela
I think it was a superhero team as well.
Unknown
Bad Santa.
Angela
No.
Shane
What in your head at this point when you think of Santa, what comes into your mind?
Chance
Yeah, what does Santa look like?
Shane
Mine's the classic. Mine's the, like, Coca Cola Santa.
Angela
He's mischievous to me.
Shane
You think Santa's mischievous?
Angela
How can he not be?
Shane
What?
Angela
Sneaking into people's house. I mean, putting things there that weren't there before. Kurt Russell, you didn't ask me if I wanted this.
Chance
You got too much coal as a kid.
Unknown
Love.
Angela
And who was.
Chance
Your hair fell.
Unknown
Your beanie fell. I'm trying to think what I think. I think just Grandpa's watching.
Angela
Sorry.
Unknown
I think loyal grandpa Fierce is mistreated.
Chance
So chance, you think Santa is mischievous looking? Like, big smile, like, up to here?
Shane
Yeah, like a horrific man.
Angela
Not horrific, just mischievous.
Chance
An aunt. Ew.
Unknown
A loyal grandpa.
Chance
I agree with Shane. I always think Coca Cola commercial grandpa. Yeah, he's jolly.
Shane
I just Think he's jolly.
Chance
Just because that commercial makes me so happy. The polar bears and Santa, just to think that they're all open up a glass bottle of Coca Cola and they're sliding down a mountain. That commercial makes me happy.
Shane
It does. That's pretty sick.
Chance
Mm.
Shane
Yeah. Did you guys ever. I have a Christmas tradition that I feel like nobody else does. Did any of you hide the pickle?
Chance
Yes.
Unknown
Why?
Chance
I just said this to fucking H yesterday. I was like, we need a pickle for the trees. Like, why would we put a real pickle? Wait, I'm like, no, it was a tradition.
Shane
It was a tradition we introduced.
Chance
So it's. It's. You don't need. It doesn't need to be a real pickle. You can buy an ornament.
Shane
You can buy an ornament.
Chance
You hide the pickle in the tree, like, Pickle Rick. And then.
Shane
Yeah. So you get this. This pickle ornament. And it's. Ours was just like a glass little.
Unknown
Is this why they sell so many pickle ornaments?
Shane
And you hide it. My mom would hide it in the tree, and then my. My brother and I, or brothers, depending on which Christmas would go out. And whoever could find it first gets to open up a present.
Chance
Gets to open up a present.
Shane
Then just then, right then it's hard to find because it's green. So it's. You're looking throughout a tree, and our tree was just littered with ornaments.
Angela
You know who else found a green pickle on Christmas? Cindy Lou who?
Chance
Yeah.
Unknown
Ew. You disgusting man.
Chance
That's part of his.
Shane
Christmas is ruined.
Unknown
Christmas is ruined.
Shane
There's gotta be.
Angela
We gonna find the pickle.
Shane
You know what the tagline. You know what I hate, though? There's got to be a grizzly inch porno.
Unknown
I have a weird Christmas tradition.
Chance
You're right.
Angela
And I'm mad about it.
Unknown
My family and I, we do. When I go to Florida, we do, like, a big white elephant. And for stealing, we think you have to. You have to pay the price. So you either. We do like two options. You either have to get iced and take a smearn off ice, which is only for the cousins. The adults don't do it. Except Uncle Robin.
Shane
Nice.
Unknown
Who can. Who can really take Hell yeah.
Shane
Bringing Uncle Robin.
Unknown
Hell yeah, freaking Uncle Robin could take it. And the adults don't do that. Or. Or if you want to steal a gift, you have to do a karaoke song of the person who's the gift. You're stealing's choice.
Chance
Wait, that's amazing.
Unknown
So we could pick like a humiliating ass song to make them that baby shark. Exactly.
Chance
That's amazing.
Unknown
Yeah. Or one year, we. We only did take me to your Christmas one year. It was just nine to five, over and over.
Chance
No. God, no.
Angela
Yeah.
Chance
Oh, your Christmas, one day.
Unknown
Take me to your Christmas.
Shane
We're gonna. We're gonna crash your Christmas. We're gonna go to lax. We're gonna.
Unknown
They'd be like, oh, these are all your co workers from Smoosh. Oh, they always say smoosh. And they always say. They always say stu kid. And I go, it's starkid and it's smosh.
Angela
They just like the double O.
Unknown
They just. I don't know how you just stoo.
Shane
Kid is crazy.
Unknown
Or it's always like the stars thing, the star thing. And smoosh. It's always smoosh.
Chance
Yeah. Families don't know how to say smosh. It's just like, not. Doesn't register for them.
Shane
Yeah.
Chance
I have a weird. A weird family tradition that we. Every year we don't do it. It's just for my mom, she does it to herself.
Unknown
Oh, this is incredible.
Chance
She always. Every year has a gift. Yeah, every year she has a gift that's to her from her face.
Angela
She opens up.
Chance
I was little, she would go, oh, my God. And it's the most. It's the biggest gift and it's the biggest beautiful wrapped present. She went, oh, my God. To me from me.
Unknown
No.
Shane
Okay. That part's psycho.
Chance
And she opens it and it's always like, it's a gorgeous scarf that I've always wanted. It's like a tradition.
Unknown
No, you have to film it this year. You have to.
Angela
Feels like an invasion of.
Chance
To me, from me.
Unknown
Just film it for me.
Chance
Always. Every single year.
Shane
For my private collection.
Chance
But you guys said dildo. You know, last Christmas she gave me a traveling vibrator. Last Christmas it was me. It was me. It was me, my husband and my. And we were all sitting there and she was like, I got you a gift. What makes the vibrator not traveling tinier? I don't fucking know.
Shane
And she. You opened that in front of like, your whole family?
Chance
Yeah. She was dying.
Shane
That's crazy.
Unknown
It made her laugh.
Chance
Oh, yeah. She gave it. She was like, I don't know.
Shane
You guys are.
Chance
You guys are probably traveling h. You'll probably love it. And H was dying. I'm dead serious.
Angela
That's crazy.
Shane
That's fully nuts.
Chance
And it was opened. The box was open.
Unknown
She opened it.
Chance
The box was ripped open.
Angela
No yes. No.
Chance
So yeah, I wrote a sketch about it at UCV and we opened it because it literally the sketch was.
Unknown
Oh, I saw the sketch.
Chance
Yeah.
Unknown
So good.
Chance
Yeah. She gave me a traveling vibrator that was opened.
Angela
So what did you. Did you.
Chance
And H was just like, this is great, Cindy. Thank you so much. And she's like, ah, I figured you guys would love it.
Shane
I don't know. That's.
Chance
She was dying laughing and she was. It's a joke, but it's not. You should use it. Why the fuck is it open?
Angela
Thank you, mother.
Chance
Why the hell is it?
Unknown
My mom does a thing where now that Santa's not real in our household, she has to describe every gift from a certain Santa. So she's giving someone like yoga pants. She goes, from yoga Santa.
Shane
Okay, that's awesome.
Chance
She'll go.
Unknown
She'll go. Like if she got my dad some whiskey, she'll go from alcoholic Santa. Every single, single thing.
Shane
I like the idea of a bunch of different Santas.
Unknown
Every gift is from a certain type of Santa.
Chance
Chance, do you have a weird tradition that you do for Christmas?
Angela
We always open our jammies up Christmas Eve.
Shane
We always have jammies.
Unknown
Jammies. Yeah.
Angela
I get Christmas jammies every year. And we always open it up.
Unknown
Are they the same?
Angela
No, they're different every year.
Chance
The same pair every year. Can you imagine?
Angela
And now my mom kind of likes to do bits.
Unknown
No, but aren't jammies the same?
Angela
No, all the jimmies are different.
Unknown
Okay.
Angela
But now they're kind of like jokes. She likes to get weird ones now. So last year mine were like, it was black Santa and black reindeer. Don't ask how the reindeer were black.
Chance
Okay.
Shane
Voiced by Tom Cruise, voiced all the.
Chance
Black reindeer.
Angela
But that's pretty much it.
Chance
Where do you get black stuff? Santa PJs.
Angela
I don't know where she gets them. I think TJ Maxx. Cuz she gets everything from TJ Maxx.
Chance
TJ Maxx. Crushing it.
Angela
It is literally the best place on earth.
Chance
The PJs are so freaking cute. I only. I got PJs last year from my mother in law and they were like capris on me. And I was like, ah, yay. Snowflakes that go up to my knees. I love it. I looked like I was from the 20s.
Unknown
I was like, to my. You guys do the week after Christmas leading up to New Year's?
Shane
Oh yeah.
Unknown
That week is the dead week.
Chance
Yeah, it's a weird week.
Shane
It's sort of like that's the holiday week. Cause people Go like, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. So it's like, all right, we got this stretch now where we're kind of just chilling. It's just usually pretty chill for my family.
Unknown
I chill and I start watching movies.
Chance
Is like, that's when I really watch outdoor walks. I'm like, obsessed with. I remember, like, growing up, we would all, like, go on, like family outdoor walks, but I moved to not the biggest nature like in la, so we don't have that, but walks, movies, Just things that I've wanted.
Shane
I do watch a lot of movies. I feel like. I feel like in a way, you could argue, like any trilogy or series is a Christmas movie thing because you end up. I feel like you end up rewatching a series of movies around Christmas time. Oh, like.
Chance
Like Harry Potter's.
Shane
Like a lot of Harry Potter Potter movies. Lord of the Rings I feel like you could end up watching at that time. I end up watching Star Wars a lot.
Angela
Y.
Shane
Like the original trilogy around Christmas time. I'm a big fan this year.
Unknown
I kind of want to. I haven't seen all of the Sopranos in all of its.
Shane
You can watch all of the Sopranos.
Unknown
Maybe I'll try to do that.
Chance
I love the Sopranos.
Shane
Respect it.
Chance
You would. You would absolutely love it.
Unknown
Well, yeah, it's just. I've been sick of being like, yeah, I've never seen.
Chance
Falco is like the greatest human being in that series.
Angela
It.
Chance
All right, well, guys, we have a little fun ending segment that we're going to try. It's called foaming at the mouth.
Shane
Yeah.
Chance
And you each get a minute to rant or have a hot take about something that you're really passionate about.
Shane
Yeah, you can do it. You get holiday centric. Or if you just have something this year that you've been thinking about, let's.
Chance
Just get it off our plate so we can have a good holiday start.
Shane
I could start mine.
Chance
Yeah, you start. Let me give you. Let me give you a timer. Ready?
Shane
All right, sure.
Chance
Set. Go.
Shane
I think Christmas is starting sooner and sooner every year. It used to start, like, I'd say, like the week after Thanksgiving was what I felt like it started. And then it was like, okay, right after Thanksgiving. Now it's. Now it's begun. I swear this year it was right after Halloween that they're like, yeah, now. Now Christmas decorations are up and I'm like, this is way too soon. You can't have, like two months out of the year dedicated to Christmas. I love Christmas, but it's better if you Compact it a little bit more. If I start. If we start doing the Christmas vibes after Halloween, I'm exhausted by the time December 1st hits. I feel like it's. I feel like. I feel like it's already been Christmas for a while now. I'm like, no, stop. After Thanksgiving, that's all I need. That's all the time I need.
Chance
Nice. What are you crying? This woman, kids.
Unknown
I'm still thinking about mine.
Shane
You don't have to if you don't have one.
Unknown
Oh, I'm going to have one. I'm going to have one.
Chance
I'll foam with the mouth right now. I'll foam with the mouth. I got my Christmas tree and I was like, what the fuck? I don't understand these people that are charging over a hundred dollars for a tree. It is in nature. They cut it down and they're selling it to me for over a hundred dollars. It is a tree that we find in nature, and it's Christmas time. I'm already spending a lot of money. You know, you don't get to respond to this. And I got a tree. And literally, if you get a tree under five feet, it's like 70 bucks. Just because you get a tree that's extra tall, it's $185.
Shane
People hating on short things.
Chance
What is wrong? Like, okay, I get that. It's more. I just am pissed.
Unknown
No, it's true.
Chance
I'm just like, motherfuckers. This is in nature. It is your. You don't own this shit.
Shane
Nature. I don't think they grow. I don't think they take one from nature.
Unknown
You should pay God.
Chance
Whatever.
Angela
You should farm.
Chance
God. That's my foaming of the mouth, motherfuckers.
Unknown
Okay, I have one. Go start the clock. This is unrelated to anything going on right now. Why are we always talking about Santa and not Mrs. Claus? Unrelated to anything. Just a question. Why are we always saying that he's doing the work? We don't know what she's doing. Okay. Unrelated to anything, I think that she's always pushed to the side.
Chance
Okay.
Unknown
I think we don't know her story. Her story. Okay, Let her have a stance.
Chance
What's going on here?
Unknown
I'm foaming at the mouth. Shane and Amanda. I'm a foaming at the smash. Mouth, Shane and Amanda. Let me have. Give me the mic. She is always just sitting there while he gets to eat those cookies. Come on. Also my second foaming at the mouth. My landlord the other day told me to slow down when I'm pulling into the parking lot. Because his stray cats. I'm gonna run them over. And I was like, the nerve. Airline food.
Chance
Oh, God. That's enough. There is no airline food anymore.
Angela
I love the idea of Mrs. Claus listening to this. And she's like, shit. No, no, no. Don't tell me.
Shane
She's like, her story.
Chance
I want to work her story. Fuck no history.
Shane
Sitting back home with a pina colada.
Angela
Just like, oh, God. Oh, my God.
Shane
Calling me in again.
Unknown
I employ publicists to work on my image.
Shane
Yeah. She's like, I don't.
Angela
Don't want to.
Chance
Okay, Chance, the clock has started. Batch.
Angela
Okay. I need people to step up. Up their Christmas fashion.
Unknown
Ah.
Angela
Because, like, you're wearing the same damn sweater you've worn the past four years. Get a new one, bitch. Like, it's out of date. It's out of style. It looks a little crusty. You need a new one. Not just the Christmas sweater, too. Cause I know you're wearing that same damn Christmas tie that you've been wearing the past seven years. Get a new fucking one. Because there are more days, there are more events, and you're wearing the same tie to the same event every year. And to multiple events. You're gonna wear the same Christmas outfit to multiple events on different days. No.
Unknown
Yes.
Chance
No, you're not.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
My Christmas outfit today.
Chance
Yes.
Angela
Well, it's just, like, diversify your portfolio a little bit.
Unknown
Thank you. Thank you.
Angela
Right?
Chance
The Christmas tie. 100%.
Angela
And there are so many Christmas colors that are, like, not just red and green, red and green. You can do red and white. You can do a gold. You can do a khaki and a red.
Unknown
Show me something I haven't seen before.
Angela
Yeah. Let's play around with color a little bit.
Shane
You said that you wear the same clothes from when you were in high school. And then you're also true. Jumping on this boat.
Chance
I love that. That's a good foaming at the mouth. That's legit.
Shane
I respect that.
Chance
And also, real quick, we don't need to wear glitter every holiday. You don't need to sparkle. Although sparkle is cute.
Unknown
Can you believe that? My landlord goes, can you slow down.
Chance
When you go into the parking lot?
Unknown
My stray cat. My stray cat. Crispy. I don't want you to run over her. Then why is she a stray?
Shane
She's not your stray cat.
Angela
Why is she called Chris?
Unknown
And I went, I can't see a cat when I'm driving up. I'm kidding. I don't want to harm a cat. Okay.
Shane
But Amanda doesn't care about trees. Angela doesn't care about cats.
Unknown
I care about cats.
Shane
Happy holidays.
Chance
Happy holidays. And Chance wants you to level up your fashion this holiday. So Merry Christmas. I hope that you are enjoying your time and watching your favorite movies. Put in the comments. What movies you watched this Christmas?
Shane
Yeah, what's the best Christmas movie? Let us know.
Chance
Let us know.
Unknown
All right, love y'all.
Shane
Bye. See you later.
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Smosh Mouth Episode #26: Our Weirdest Christmas Traditions – Detailed Summary
In the festive episode of Smosh Mouth (#26) released on December 25, 2023, hosts Shane Topp (Shane) and Amanda Lehan-Canto (Amanda) delve into the quirky and unique Christmas traditions that shape their holiday celebrations. Joined by special guests Chance and Angela, the trio engages in lively discussions about everything from holiday beverages and family travel rituals to gift-giving antics and favorite Christmas movies. Below is a comprehensive rundown of the episode’s key segments, enriched with notable quotes and timestamps to capture the essence of their conversations.
The episode kicks off with the hosts sharing their preferences and unique takes on traditional Christmas drinks.
Eggnog Enthusiasm: Shane expresses his love for classic eggnog, highlighting its creamy richness. At [02:19], he shares, “I love eggnog,” while Chance adds his childhood memories, “[03:11] Growing up, we always had a bucket of eggnog and bourbon.”
Variation with Liquors: Angela discusses variations like eggnog liqueur from Trader Joe's, though Shane finds the concept strange ([03:37]). Amanda and Chance debate the incorporation of almond milk for those with lactose intolerance, with Chance affirming, “[03:56] But if you have lactose issues, which I kind of do, I got almond milk eggnog … it was effing delicious to me.”
Mulled Wine and Hot Cider: Shane’s mother’s tradition of mulled wine is touched upon, though both Shane and Angela express mixed feelings about it. At [04:55], Shane laments, “Mulled wine, I don’t love it,” contrasting with Amanda’s preference for a vodka soda ([06:05]).
Chance shares his family’s unique approach to celebrating Christmas by traveling.
The discussion shifts to the pervasive presence of Christmas music and the belief in Santa Claus.
Musical Overload: Shane reminisces about his childhood obsession with Christmas music, “[09:24] I was so stoked, I would want to listen to it before Thanksgiving.” However, he notes a waning enthusiasm as he grows older, finding the songs repetitive ([09:31]).
Revelations About Santa: Both Chance and Angela recount their moments of learning that Santa isn’t real. Chance describes a pivotal childhood moment when his curiosity led to an eye contact conversation with his mother, confirming Santa’s non-existence ([17:20]). Angela shares a similar anecdote about finding out Santa’s secret through observing her mother’s actions ([20:16]).
The hosts explore the diverse culinary traditions that make their Christmas meals memorable.
Unique Dishes: Angela details her family's stick-to-tradition meals like steak and crab, alongside creative takes like mashed potato casserole with Greek yogurt for a healthier twist ([35:25]). Chance introduces Portuguese dishes like buckeo (salted shredded cod) and lamb with mint jelly, showcasing cultural diversity in holiday fare ([35:57]).
Regional Influences: Shane contrasts his standard Christmas spread, highlighting a lack of exotic dishes, which he admits makes him envious of his guests' elaborate culinary traditions ([37:13]).
Gift exchanges and personal preferences take center stage as the hosts discuss their approaches to holiday presents.
Secret Santa: Chance advocates for Secret Santa as a practical solution to avoid the financial strain of buying gifts for all friends, stating, “[26:56] Secret Santa … I now do Secret Santa. We pick our names out of the hat …”
Thoughtful Gifts Over Pricey Items: Shane emphasizes his preference for meaningful, inexpensive gifts that hold sentimental value, such as a recipe-engraved cutting board for his mom ([31:03]).
Challenges of Gift-Giving: Angela shares her dilemma of balancing gift giving with personal disinterest in shopping, revealing, “[27:34] I don’t like buying stuff for me … all my clothes are still from high school.”
The conversation turns to beloved holiday films, highlighting favorites and critiques.
Timeless Classics: Shane champions “Home Alone” as his top Christmas movie, praising its multi-layered storytelling and emotional depth ([45:15]). Angela nods in agreement, adding, “That’s probably one of the best things you could have found.”
Mixed Opinions on Modern Films: The hosts express varied opinions on newer releases like “Polar Express” and the live-action “Grinch” movies, with criticisms centered around animation style and plot execution ([46:06]).
Creative Movie Pitches: In a playful segment, Angela and Chance brainstorm unconventional Christmas movie ideas, blending genres and adding humorous twists, such as a sequel to “The Grinch” that delves into adult themes ([43:37]).
The episode features a spirited segment where each host rants passionately about specific holiday grievances.
Shane’s Rant on Early Christmas Decorations: At [64:18], Shane voices his frustration over Christmas festivities starting too early, saying, “I think Christmas is starting sooner and sooner every year …”
Chance’s Critique of Christmas Tree Pricing: Chance vents his annoyance about the high cost of Christmas trees, “[65:15] I just said, we need a pickle for the trees … [65:49] It’s $185 for a tall tree … they cut it down and they're selling it for over a hundred dollars.”
Angela’s Fashion Advice: Angela enthusiastically encourages listeners to diversify their Christmas attire, “[67:48] Diversify your portfolio a little bit,” urging against repetitive wardrobe choices.
The hosts share their eccentric holiday traditions, adding humor and personal flair to the festivities.
Pickle in the Tree: Shane reminisces about hiding a pickle ornament in the Christmas tree as a game, a tradition that adds excitement to the present-opening ritual ([56:17]).
White Elephant with a Twist: Angela describes her family’s white elephant gift exchange, where stealing a gift involves karaoke performances, enhancing the game’s hilarity ([57:29]).
Personal Family Rituals: The guests discuss their individual traditions, such as Chance’s mom gifting herself thoughtfully wrapped presents ([59:30]) and Angela’s annual pajama reveals featuring quirky designs ([61:18]).
Throughout the episode, Shane, Amanda, Chance, and Angela highlight the diverse and often unconventional ways people celebrate Christmas. From inventive drink concoctions and elaborate meals to unique gift-giving practices and personalized movie preferences, they showcase that the essence of the holiday lies in embracing individual traditions and creating joyous, memorable experiences. Their candid conversations and humorous anecdotes offer listeners a delightful perspective on making Christmas uniquely their own.
As the episode wraps up, the hosts invite listeners to share their own Christmas traditions and favorite holiday movies, fostering a community of shared festive spirit and laughter.
Notable Quotes:
This episode of Smosh Mouth encapsulates the joyful chaos and heartfelt traditions that define Christmas for each host, offering listeners both entertainment and relatable insights into celebrating the holiday season.