#46 - Solving Smosh's Problems

Summary

Smosh Mouth Episode #46 - "Solving Smosh's Problems" Summary

Release Date: May 13, 2024

In Episode #46 of Smosh Mouth, hosts Shayne Topp and Amanda Lehan-Canto invite a rotating group of Smosh friends to discuss and troubleshoot a variety of personal and professional challenges submitted by their colleagues. The episode masterfully blends humor with genuine problem-solving, showcasing the camaraderie and witty banter that Smosh is renowned for.

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1. Introduction to Problem Solving

The episode kicks off with Shayne introducing the concept: a call for Smosh team members to present their problems for a quick five-minute solution session. Amanda echoes the sentiment, emphasizing their roles as the "most equipped people at Smosh" to handle these issues.

• Shayne [00:55]: "We're gonna solve all the problems here at Smosh."
• Amanda [01:03]: "We are problem solvers."

---

2. Guest Segments

a. Marcus – The Snoring Dilemma

Marcus brings up a new snoring issue that's disrupting his long-term relationship. Shayne and Amanda respond with a mix of concern and humor, even playing a fabricated snoring audio clip to lighten the mood.

• Marcus [05:13]: "I've started snoring... it's like, honk, shoe, like, big."
• Amanda [09:44]: "We're gonna get you a pregnancy pillow... to force you to sleep on your side."

b. Aaron – Health Concerns and Workplace Woes

Aaron discusses multiple problems, including potential bacterial vaginosis (BV), car confiscation due to expired registration, and strained personal relationships. The hosts navigate these issues with empathy and comedic relief, addressing each concern methodically.

• Aaron [11:12]: "I just shower once a week now."
• Shayne [14:35]: "How do I prevent bad things from happening to...?"

c. Lizzy – Fear of Confrontation

Lizzy seeks advice on overcoming her fear of confrontation. Amanda shares her strategies, emphasizing the importance of expressing personal feelings without aggression.

• Lizzy [17:20]: "I'm afraid of confrontation... I need to learn from you."
• Amanda [18:14]: "Resentment building because I didn't say anything was way worse."

d. Andre – Crafting a D&D Storyline

Andre, the DM for the Smosh office D&D game, struggles with developing a compelling villain for their campaign set in Sigil, the City of Doors. Shayne and Amanda brainstorm creative villain concepts, including integrating personal conflicts and complex character backstories.

• Andre [23:32]: "I need help with the big bad boss."
• Amanda [24:33]: "What if the villain has a connection to his past?"

e. Nicole – Concerns Over AI-Generated Voice Perceptions

Nicole is troubled by comments suggesting her voice sounds AI-generated. The hosts delve into the nuances of vocal perception and the impact of AI on personal identity, offering supportive insights and affirmations.

• Nicole [29:25]: "People say my voice sounds AI-generated."
• Amanda [33:37]: "You have a unique, beautiful voice."

f. Josh – Workplace Bullying

Josh recounts his traumatic experiences with a colleague named Peter Ditzler, describing instances of bullying and harassment. Shayne and Amanda address the serious nature of workplace bullying while maintaining their characteristic humor to diffuse tension.

• Josh [35:11]: "I've been getting bullied by Peter Ditzler."
• Amanda [36:20]: "We'll get rid of the problem."

g. Emily – Navigating Dating Apps

Emily expresses frustration with crafting the perfect dating app prompts, fearing they come off as inauthentic or cringe. Shayne and Amanda offer practical and humorous suggestions to help her strike the right balance between humor and genuine expression.

• Emily [41:09]: "I overthink dating app prompts... I don't know how to balance being funny and flirty."
• Shayne [43:56]: "Play the Godfather [e-mail]. Welcome to the family."

h. Angela – Humorous Baby Care Scenario

Angela presents a comical situation involving a crying baby that the hosts interact with, blending absurd humor with affectionate responses.

• Angela [48:55]: "I need a babysitter."
• Shayne [50:25]: "Good job, Cho."

i. Matt Duran – Coping with Loss

Matt shares his feelings about losing his father two decades ago. The hosts offer heartfelt support while interspersing humorous elements to ease the emotional weight of his story.

• Matt [55:03]: "My dad is dead. I feel like having a dad for a moment."
• Shayne [57:40]: "It's okay to be a soft bitch sometimes."

j. Rock – Fortnite Addiction

Rock admits to an addiction to Fortnite, prompting Shayne and Amanda to engage in a playful and exaggerated discussion about gaming habits, further highlighting their comedic dynamic.

• Rock [60:35]: "I'm addicted to Fortnite."
• Amanda [72:07]: "You're addicted to gaming? That's a problem."

k. Selena – Director’s Support and Friendship Advice

Selena, the director, seeks advice on making friends as an adult. Shayne and Amanda provide thoughtful strategies, emphasizing the importance of shared passions and community engagement.

• Selena [74:00]: "How to make friends as an adult."
• Shayne [75:50]: "Find your passions and connect with communities."

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3. Notable Moments and Quotes

Throughout the episode, Shayne and Amanda intersperse serious advice with their trademark humor, making the problem-solving process both entertaining and relatable. Highlights include:

• Shayne [08:17]: "You need to duct tape your mouth."
• Amanda [44:42]: "I'll put the fart one on my profile, and we'll see what happens."
• Amanda [57:25]: "How do you feel now?"
• Shayne [67:34]: "No, no. It's pretty serious, though."

---

4. Concluding Remarks

As the episode draws to a close, Shayne expresses gratitude for the participation of their guests, while Amanda suggests a potential follow-up episode to address unresolved issues, hinting at future content. The hosts wrap up with their signature comedic flair, leaving listeners both amused and thoughtful about the various problems discussed.

• Amanda [80:01]: "I think that we should do this again."
• Shayne [80:31]: "We have solved a lot of problems today."

---

Conclusion

"Smosh Mouth" Episode #46 successfully balances humor with heartfelt advice, providing a platform for Smosh team members and friends to voice their concerns while receiving supportive and entertaining responses. Shayne and Amanda's chemistry shines through, making this episode a memorable blend of comedy and genuine problem-solving.

Transcript

[Shane]

It is Ryan Seacrest here. There was a recent social media trend which consisted of flying on a plane with no music, no movies, no entertainment. But a better trend would be going to chumbacasino.com. it's like having a mini social casino in your pocket. Chumba casino has over 100 online casino style games, all absolutely free. It's the most fun you can have online and on a plane. So grab your free welcome bonus [e-mail] sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary vgw group void where prohibited by law 21 + terms and conditions apply. Welcome to Smosh Mouth. I'm Shane.

[Amanda]

And I'm Amanda. And we have a very important episode today. We have a lot of guests.

[Shane]

We put out a call to all of our co workers here at Smosh asking them if they have problems to come to us and we'll solve it in roughly five minutes.

[Amanda]

Roughly.

[Shane]

And we got a lot of responses. A lot of people have a lot of problems here. So we're gonna solve all the problems here at Smosh.

[Amanda]

Yeah, we're gonna solve it. And they're gonna be just fine after they leave.

[Shane]

Everyone's gonna be after this episode.

[Amanda]

We are problem solvers.

[Shane]

Yeah. We're the two most equipped people at.

[Amanda]

Smosh when we have no problems whatsoever.

[Shane]

Exactly. No, we're smart. We're intelligent, wise, hot. We can solve your problems. We're freaking hot, dude.

[Amanda]

We're hot people who solve your problems. Get in here.

[Shane]

Yeah. Come on. We've seen the list. There's a lot of people. We're gonna try to get to all of them.

[Amanda]

Yeah. I'm really excited.

[Shane]

We can't leave someone behind. No, that'd be God.

[Amanda]

Not leave soldiers behind.

[Shane]

No.

[Amanda]

Just like you leave me behind in fnaf. You disassociate so hard, dude.

[Shane]

I don't know if. If sister location is out yet as of this episode airing, but we've. We've now. We've done it all.

[Amanda]

We've done all of fnaf.

[Shane]

How crazy? How do you feel?

[Amanda]

I feel really, really good. I think that I need to know the lore.

[Shane]

I. Look, I need. I need our audience to help us. We need to get Matpat on this show.

[Amanda]

We need to get Matpat.

[Shane]

We need to get him on here to.

[Amanda]

How can we get Matpat?

[Shane]

I mean, he's off the grid now.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

He retired. He literally, after we did that episode. I'm not kidding. It was like within weeks that he retired, he announced his retirement from being a game Theorist.

[Amanda]

So I'll send him a letter.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

That'll get him.

[Amanda]

Yeah. In cursive.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah. He only can read incursive if you type it out. He does not understand.

[Amanda]

He does not understand it.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

I'm super excited today because we have so many people coming on. We only have five minutes. I can't wait to hear what they say, and I hope that we can solve their problems. I'm pretty sure we can.

[Shane]

Yeah. And we're gonna. We're definitely going to be serious about solving these problems. Don't joke.

[Amanda]

I'm a very serious person.

[Shane]

Yeah, so am I. I never joke.

[Amanda]

I know.

[Shane]

Never joke.

[Amanda]

You do fart a lot, but you never joke.

[Shane]

What the hell are you talking about?

[Amanda]

I've literally heard you fart so many times.

[Shane]

You've that.

[Amanda]

Guys, once the camera goes off.

[Shane]

This is actually a lot. This is actually not joke.

[Amanda]

Hear me out. Once the camera goes off, you rip on it.

[Shane]

I do not.

[Amanda]

And it is horrendous.

[Shane]

What are you talking about?

[Amanda]

A lot of people don't stay in this room. And you know why? Because you rip.

[Shane]

The only person who leaves this room is Brennan. All right.

[Amanda]

Yeah. Because he doesn't want to get hurt or.

[Shane]

Okay, actually, real talk. I've. I've. I don't know if I've ever heard anyone fart here. It's at this workplace.

[Amanda]

What?

[Shane]

I don't think I've ever heard anyone fart.

[Amanda]

I really hope that someone has a problem that they consistently fart and no one has heard it and they feel.

[Shane]

I know people fart, but I think people at smosh. Very silent. I've never heard, like, I. Because if I did, I. I.

[Amanda]

What would you do? You call them out.

[Shane]

No, I would laugh.

[Amanda]

You just fart.

[Shane]

It'd be hard for me not to laugh if we're all sitting there working on our computers and then you just hear, like, a. I. I'd lose it. I think everyone else would do.

[Amanda]

I think so, too. But they have those big headphones on all the.

[Shane]

That's true. You probably could get away with it.

[Amanda]

You could probably.

[Shane]

I would make sure. I'd go over to the editing bay where they all have those huge headphones on. They're working.

[Amanda]

They won't know.

[Shane]

Just.

[Amanda]

They don't know.

[Shane]

Well, they'll know after. They'll know.

[Amanda]

Oh, they'll know.

[Shane]

They'll eventually know.

[Amanda]

Yeah. God. It's not a smoshmouth episode unless we talk about farts, which is a great thing. I watched this Instagram.

[Shane]

Oh, Shaker.

[Amanda]

Shut up. I watched this Instagram of two old people who film themselves going on dinner, dinner, walk. Dinner, fart walks. Here's the thing. My Discover page is really cool.

[Shane]

Okay?

[Amanda]

So there are these two older people who film themselves going on after dinner fart walks. And they just describe how it's so healthy, how it's so great. They're like, we're going on an after dinner fart walk.

[Shane]

Are they British?

[Amanda]

Or maybe I just made them British because it sounds better.

[Shane]

Nancy and I like to go on our fart walks after.

[Amanda]

I'll send it to you. Going for a fart walk after dinner.

[Shane]

Is something that's going to help you age wonderfully. That's. That actually is pretty incredible.

[Amanda]

So should we have our first.

[Shane]

Let's get him in here.

[Amanda]

Okay, Marcus. Marcus, get your butt in here.

[Shane]

Marcus, let's hear your problem.

[Amanda]

Should we clap?

[Shane]

Yeah, let's clap. Should we clap?

[Amanda]

Should we clap? I feel like we should clap. We've never had this, like, group of people coming on.

[Shane]

This is different. Okay, Marcus, welcome. Hi.

[Amanda]

Hi, Katie.

[Shane]

Hi, Amanda.

[Amanda]

Hi, Marcus.

[Shane]

So good to see you both. Good to see you, too.

[Amanda]

Good to see you, too.

[Shane]

What is your problem today? Okay, so my problem for you both to help me solve is that recently I have started snoring. I started snoring. I have started snoring. Yes. Okay. And I am not a snorer. I've been with my girlfriend for 10 years, and just recently, like, maybe a month or two ago, I started snoring. And it wasn't like a cute little snore. It's like, honk, shoe, like, big. Keeping her up at night, snore. Oh. And I feel so terrible. I'm, like, ashamed. I'm embarrassed because I'm like, I don't want you to lose sleep over me snoring. Like, this is new. I want to figure this out.

[Amanda]

So is she really, really upset with you?

[Shane]

No, she is lovely. She's a sweetheart. She's the kindest person. But she wanted to let me know. Cause it also could be like, a health thing too, right? Sometimes, I guess.

[Amanda]

You guys are so sweet. If my husband started snoring, I'd be like, you need to go.

[Shane]

Get out. Like, do I sleep on the couch? Okay. Did you change how you're sleeping in any sort of way? I'm trying to. I have some audio to play for you all. Do you have your snores? I have my snores, so I always hear it. I knew this was gonna be happening.

[Amanda]

And I was like, okay.

[Shane]

I told her I was like, can you please, at some point this week, try to catch me snoring so we can hear it back live? And I fell asleep on the couch the other night, and she ran over and got her phone and started recording me. So there's like 15 seconds of me snoring. If y'all would like to hear me snore.

[Amanda]

Of course we would. We have to understand what we're working with. Yes. Okay.

[Shane]

And I'm. I'm so embarrassed by this, but this is. This is me snoring in Caught in the Moment. Give me a beret. Shut up.

[Amanda]

Shut up, shut up.

[Shane]

I don't know what that was.

[Amanda]

Shut up.

[Shane]

I don't know what that was.

[Amanda]

Shut up.

[Shane]

There's more snoring. There's more snoring.

[Amanda]

Hold on.

[Shane]

Keep going. I'm sorry. Wow. Keep going. Keep going. I didn't realize. I guess I should have listened back to this before. Okay, Sorry. Sorry, y'all. Okay. Oh. Oh, my God. Well, that. That's all. That was. The whole thing. I don't know. I don't know what that was. I don't know what that was. Okay, but for real. For real, I've been snoring. Okay, the farts. The farts were added in post. That was post. I did it in post. Did it in post. But the snore. Are those snores real? The snoring was real, but. Or it was fake. Sorry. It was fake, but my problem is real. Okay, but you're snore. That is a recreation.

[Amanda]

I immediately admitted it.

[Shane]

That's a recreation. I got a complete. None of that's real. I can't. I just know.

[Amanda]

I was gonna say because that snore is deadly. Like, that is gonna end a relationship.

[Shane]

Snore, but that's what it is. That is the level of your snoring. That is the level of snoring. Aren't there things like tape or something that you can put on your nose or something? Like. Have you tried any of that stuff? Not yet, but I've been looking into that, and I know that's a thing.

[Amanda]

Okay, so first, let me just ask, is this a make it or break it for you and your partner?

[Shane]

No, absolutely not. Okay. Maybe the problem is she needs to get over it.

[Amanda]

Shane, you can go.

[Shane]

Whoa.

[Amanda]

Shane, you can go.

[Shane]

Shane told me. Or.

[Amanda]

No, no, no, listen. This is why Shane has me. Don't listen to that.

[Shane]

Look, we're running on not much time here. You could also duct tape your mouth.

[Amanda]

No, hear me out, okay? Do they still sell Breathe right Strips?

[Shane]

I think so. I've seen.

[Amanda]

I think maybe, like, you're sick or like, my sinus maybe Your sinus is congested.

[Shane]

How long has this been going on for? Like a month. A month? It just started. It's super new, but I'm so. Yeah, that, like, snoring. I just like. I'm terrified that I, like. I don't want to keep anybody up at night.

[Amanda]

Do you sleep on your back?

[Shane]

I do.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

I'm going to help you out right now. We're going to get you a pregnancy pillow. We're going to get you a long pillow that looks like a snake so you can wrap your whole body around it so you are forced to sleep on your side. Because when you sleep on your back, it triggers snores.

[Shane]

Oh, okay.

[Amanda]

Yeah. So, yeah, it triggers snores, exactly. And that's what you look like when you sleep. So if you have a big old pregnancy pill that you can snuggle, it might relieve some of your snoring.

[Shane]

That sounds lovely.

[Amanda]

Also, possibly taking Mucinex for a week. Maybe you have some clogged up stuff, I think.

[Shane]

Yeah. It's feeling like maybe it's up here and maybe not like a whole thing. We need to get the help of Osmosis Joe.

[Amanda]

Or you can just.

[Shane]

Just take Shane's advice. Yeah, take my advice.

[Amanda]

Just tell your partner to fucking deal with it.

[Shane]

Oh, my gosh.

[Amanda]

Don't do that.

[Shane]

Okay, great. Hey, I've. Thank you both.

[Amanda]

You're so welcome. I want to hear back after you implement this.

[Shane]

Happy to follow up.

[Amanda]

And also pregnancy pillow. Yeah, you're farting in your sleep.

[Shane]

Just.

[Amanda]

Good luck with that.

[Shane]

Farting. What? That's good. Go for walks after dinner.

[Amanda]

I'll send you the video.

[Shane]

Probably not too far from the truth of what that recording was, so. Thank you, Marcus.

[Amanda]

Thank you, Marcus.

[Shane]

Thank you. I appreciate it.

[Amanda]

Good luck. Best of luck to you. Thank you.

[Shane]

All right, our next client is walking in now.

[Amanda]

Oh, my God.

[Shane]

Oh, dear.

[Amanda]

She's shivering from the cold.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

She's wrapped in a yellow blanket.

[Shane]

We have Aaron Dougal here.

[Amanda]

Aaron Dougal. Hi, Erin.

[Shane]

Hi. She is opening up some pineapple juice. 100% pineapple juice. This is to make my coochie taste more juicy.

[Amanda]

Oh, my God.

[Shane]

You can cut that.

[Amanda]

You can cut that. That's not a problem.

[Shane]

We're not gonna cut that. That's insane. If you say something insane here, we're gonna keep it in.

[Amanda]

That's not a problem. That's just Aaron.

[Shane]

Thank You. So what? What's going on? I have bv. No, I'm kidding.

[Amanda]

Dare I ask? What the fuck is bv? You don't know what BV is? No, breast BV is bacterial vaginosis. This is not why.

[Shane]

I gotta get Osmosis Jones again.

[Amanda]

Take some Mucinex, babe. Shove some Mucinex up there and you'll be set in a week. That is not why I'm here today.

[Shane]

I am here today because I don't know if you guys have noticed or ever talked to me, but a lot of dumb things keep happening to me, specifically this month. So I just want to know how I can stop being so dumb. How I can stop the dumb things.

[Amanda]

Things from happening to me. Give us a rundown of a few things that were dumb that happened to you.

[Shane]

So I did make a list of everything bad that happened to me this month. Whoa. Okay. I think I'm aware of some of them.

[Amanda]

Yes. Okay.

[Shane]

So the first thing was my TikTok got hacked and was being held for ransom.

[Amanda]

So that was. What was the ransom at?

[Shane]

I didn't ask. Ian told me not to ask.

[Amanda]

Yeah, no, So I didn't. Probably smart.

[Shane]

Do not negotiate with TikTok.

[Amanda]

I did not. They did have guns in their profile pics. So I was like, you can have it.

[Shane]

You can just have my TikTok. So that was the first thing.

[Amanda]

Then I accidentally dyed my roots blue.

[Shane]

If you remember that.

[Amanda]

I do remember that. And then my car was confiscated by.

[Shane]

The police because I had expired registration.

[Amanda]

And an out of state license and.

[Shane]

It was also expired, so they took it. Okay.

[Amanda]

Yeah, I do know that. So you.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah. And you don't negotiate with terrorists, Right?

[Amanda]

Exactly.

[Shane]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[Amanda]

Do you have your car back? I did. Ian and Anthony took me to get it back. Whoa.

[Shane]

And the cops were like, whoa. Yeah. They're like, it's not. You can just have it.

[Amanda]

You're back together. Whoa.

[Shane]

And they just gave it to me.

[Amanda]

So shout out to them, Sergeant Anus. I get that. Okay.

[Shane]

Okay. Also, I had my period for three.

[Amanda]

Months straight because I had a cyst on my ovaries. So that was really fun. I was super hormonal and just felt ugly for like, three months. It's gone now. It's gone. Wait, it's horrendous. Yeah, just girly things. Cysts on ovaries are very, very common and women do not talk about it enough.

[Shane]

And that is why I'm here.

[Amanda]

Okay, I'll kick Shane out for the next episode and we'll talk about it for three months. Three months? Horrendous. Oh, and then my therapist broke up with me.

[Shane]

Then I went on a date with a guy who, after the first date.

[Amanda]

He texted me and he just wanted to, like, brand collab.

[Shane]

Like, he just wanted me to post his. He has this hat that says slay.

[Amanda]

And it's in the LA Dodgers font.

[Shane]

And he wanted me to post it because I work. He wanted me to promote it.

[Amanda]

And then my last thing was like.

[Shane]

I just shower, like, once a week now.

[Amanda]

Why? Those are my problems. I think with the cyst part, we should be showering a little bit more.

[Shane]

I don't know how showers are gonna affect.

[Amanda]

The cyst is gone.

[Shane]

I don't know how that'll affect it. Okay, Aaron, but you're presenting problems. Do you think the showering once a week is a problem or. Well, for others, yeah, probably. Okay.

[Amanda]

I showered today, though, because I knew.

[Shane]

I'd be sitting with you guys.

[Amanda]

You look beautiful. Oh, thanks. Okay. That is a lot going on in one month.

[Shane]

Yes.

[Amanda]

So a couple of those are already solved because Daddy, Ian and Anthony got your car back.

[Shane]

The car back. You have the TikTok back.

[Amanda]

I got the TikTok.

[Shane]

You're feeling better.

[Amanda]

You got rid of your cyst, which is. That's.

[Shane]

That's. That's.

[Amanda]

I think we need to unpack that later.

[Shane]

So what is. What is the remaining problems? Because it sounds like you've solved a lot of.

[Amanda]

Therapists broke up with you.

[Shane]

Therapist broke up with you. That sucks.

[Amanda]

Yeah, I did fix my hair, too.

[Shane]

I guess I resolved my problem.

[Amanda]

I'm just. How do I prevent them?

[Shane]

How do you know? How do I prevent bad things from happening to. I guess I would say you can't prevent all problems.

[Amanda]

I mean, those are big ones.

[Shane]

Those are big.

[Amanda]

Maybe. Maybe telling more people about what's going on so you have more support so you don't feel, like, overwhelmed and you're alone, like, when your car was gone. Do you know what I mean? Like, maybe more support. Right?

[Shane]

I did just stand on the side of PCH alone for a few hours.

[Amanda]

Yeah. I think telling more people. Like, I would have loved to talk about everything that's going on with you. And, like, your sis. That is so scary.

[Shane]

Thank you.

[Amanda]

She doesn't like to get deep. Look at. She doesn't like to get deep.

[Shane]

The only problem that I foresaw possibly happening is something to do with a guy that you're dating. And I would say just whenever you match with a guy, just before you even say anything, Ask anyone. Like, ask Mallory or is this a good. Don't ask me.

[Amanda]

Oh, show me, show me.

[Shane]

I am not gonna be able to help.

[Amanda]

I don't know. He took a picture in a stairway, and I can't even see his face. I'm not sure.

[Shane]

See, I think, Aaron, this will help.

[Amanda]

I think. Yeah. Let's make sure we're on the same page about slowly walking people. So that's not a complete sentence. I think maybe.

[Shane]

Well, he's from Berlin. He's from Berlin.

[Amanda]

Okay. Yeah. I think grow your community and have us check in and see if it's like, maybe that's not the right dye for your hair and that's not the right guy. And we will help you because things work better with a tribe, I think.

[Shane]

And also, all I can say is be proud of yourself. You've overcome a lot.

[Amanda]

You've overcome a lot, and you look gorgeous. Thank you. Oh, my gosh. Thank you.

[Shane]

Yeah, thank you.

[Amanda]

This was helpful.

[Shane]

And perhaps you pissed off some sort of ancient God.

[Amanda]

That's fair. All right, well, cheers. Cheers, babe.

[Shane]

Cheers. Thank you.

[Amanda]

Good luck with the pineapple. Thank you. Wow. Woo.

[Shane]

Aaron lives a sitcom life right off the gate. Okay, next client, Lizzie.

[Amanda]

Client.

[Shane]

Yeah, we're helping.

[Amanda]

Yeah, you're right. You're right.

[Shane]

But we're for free. It's all pro bono.

[Amanda]

Hi, Lizzy. Hi. You look beautiful today.

[Shane]

Oh, thank you.

[Amanda]

So what's going on today?

[Shane]

Um, so it's kind of a constant problem I have is I'm afraid of confrontation. Okay. And I know I watch every video. Obviously that is part of my job, but I feel like Shane and I relate here because you don't like to talk to strangers. You don't like confrontation. I'm exactly the same way. So I feel like I need to learn from you.

[Amanda]

I enjoy confrontation. Someone told me on an airplane once that I should. I should go first to push past, through the people. Because she was like, you seem confrontational. And I was like, I would never do that.

[Shane]

You seem like a huge bastard.

[Amanda]

It's the confidence, I think. Yeah. So it is. So wait, so do you want to get better at confrontation because it's necessary in order to set boundaries.

[Shane]

Yeah. And just to say how I feel, sometimes I don't really talk about how I'm feeling in issues or situations because I'm just like, oh, I'll just sit here and stew in my issues and not say anything ever, and I'll be fine. And it'll be fine.

[Amanda]

That's. So for me, it took me a Long time to do that. Then I realized that resentment building because I didn't say anything was way worse feeling than actually saying. The biggest thing that I learned about confrontation is. Confrontation is such, like, an aggressive word. I would see it more as, shine the light on yourself and be like, I need. I am hoping for. I felt hurt in this scenario rather than being like, you hurt me. You didn't do this. You don't respect me. Always shine the light on yourself. And in a way, weirdly, people will. You can't control how people will respond, but people will react in a way. If you're shining the light on yourself, if it's a relationship that's gonna work out because you might confront or talk to people, and then you're like, I don't think this relationship's gonna go anywhere. I need to add in a third person to kind of be the middleman. But I always find that it gets easier the more you do it. So shine the light on yourself. Like, it hurts me when you do this. Yeah, I really need a little bit of time. Or I need this quiet time, or I need. I need alone time here.

[Shane]

Would you bring it up right in the moment or what if.

[Amanda]

Cause sometimes when something happens, I'm just like, oh, no.

[Shane]

Are you talking about just specifically with strangers or even with. No, even with people I'm close to. Very close to. Yeah.

[Amanda]

I wouldn't bring it up right now.

[Shane]

I'm too much of a Libra. You know, it's like, I want everything to be balanced and, like, everyone just.

[Amanda]

Like, yeah, my husband's a Libra. He's a triple Libra. I understand. So sometimes I, like, will go to bat for him, but that's not always good either, because he needs to express himself. I would say not in the moment. I would say wait until things have calmed down for a second, because in the moment, that person might not be able to hear what you're saying. What do you think, Shane?

[Shane]

I think also when we think of confrontation, we think of, like, the people we know who are good at confrontation or just who are like. Like, I don't know. It's like the east coast vibe. It's just like. But you think confrontation has to be that way. You're allowed to confront people in your own way. Right. Like, and it's gonna look different than anyone else, but it's just. And I think calling it confrontation makes it scary. But it could just be like, oh, I'm just gonna communicate with you. Let them know. Communicating hard things. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Yes. Which, unfortunately, we have to do because it hurts us more when we don't. And you are not a bad person for communicating hard things. Everybody has hard things. Not everyone communicates it, but it makes it worse for that person. They're just hurting themselves more. And I promise you, it does get easier when you do it. But sometimes it's harder scenarios than others. But I also. Also what I do, too, if it's a really hard thing that I have to kind of communicate, I reach out to, like, the three to four people that I trust that know me, and I run it through them. First, I'm like, what do you think about this?

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

I try to get their advice, but I'm always shining a light on myself. I. This hurts me. Yeah. I need this.

[Shane]

I think it's also because I'm this way where I'll be sitting there. I'm like, okay, I need to talk to this person about this thing. And I'm just sitting there thinking it over and over. Like you're running the scenario in your head over and over again. Then you reach a certain point where you're like, well, I have. The scenario is played out a million times. It keeps being the same. What else could happen? So I have to go. Go and just do it. And so I kind of reached this point where I. I'm there. I'm kind of like. I'll be standing near them. I'm kind of like, just, like, looking around. And then I almost. In my head, I just am like, go. Like, I. And I just kind of. It's like when you jump in, it is jumping in a cold pool. You just like. You just go. And then like, I often start with a. Like, hey, so. And honestly, I do it so that I'm talking.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And there. Now I can't. Then I'll just come out, pull back. Yeah. I do that. So that I force myself to. That's the hardest part, is it starting it.

[Amanda]

Just to start it.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

And know that you might be bad at it for a while, and that's okay. You're human beings. But the person, if they're clued in, they know what it's about.

[Shane]

And you know to, like, muscle memory. Just start flipping people off all the time. Oh. And then that way you're confronting on a constant basis. That I can do. Yeah. Start doing that.

[Amanda]

Oh, yeah. I do it to the back of people's heads all the time. Shane. Every time he walks by me, I'm like.

[Shane]

And I know she does it when there's mirrors in front of me. Anyways. Thank you. I hope. Good luck. That helps let us know how the confrontations go.

[Amanda]

Yeah. Or the communicating.

[Shane]

Yes, yes. Communication. Thank you, guys. Thank.

[Amanda]

You're welcome. Wow, this is fun.

[Shane]

This is really cool.

[Amanda]

I feel like I need a blazer, like a jacket.

[Shane]

All right, next up, Andre is here.

[Amanda]

Andre.

[Shane]

Hello, guys. Hello, Andre. How are you?

[Amanda]

You have the moon card on your shirt. I do, and I love it.

[Shane]

Thank you. What does that mean?

[Amanda]

It's the wolf and the dog. Which one are you going to respond to? It's like the call of the wild or like the domesticated home one. Like your comfort zone and your uncomfortable. You're conscious, you're unconscious.

[Shane]

Yeah, I just like the graphic.

[Amanda]

I didn't know.

[Shane]

I just thought it looked sick.

[Amanda]

All right.

[Shane]

It was pretty cool.

[Amanda]

So what's going on?

[Shane]

Well, I have a little creative writing for you guys. I am the DM for the Smosh office D and D game. So there's currently like 10 of us, and I have, like. Let me set the stage for you guys, right? Yes, please. So it takes place in Sigil, the city of Doors. It is a plane of existence that is in the center of all the other planes of existence. So very often people get teleported there by accident or people get banished there. So it's kind of like this junk zone for all planes of existence.

[Amanda]

Got it.

[Shane]

And all the characters are teleported there at the same time, and they're tied to something called the bestial vortex. It's a portal that opens up and releases monsters. So they have to fight the monsters. The problem is I don't have, like, a big bad. You know, it's like a combat oriented game. So they're just fighting monsters.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

So at the moment, I'm toying with the owner of the arena that they're fighting in. The Colosseum is going to be the big bad guy.

[Amanda]

Ooh, so like, one top villain.

[Shane]

Yes. The big bad boss that you would play. Yes.

[Amanda]

Okay. For some reason, I'm already thinking, like, Mad Max vibes, like, what does this villain want over? Like, does he want control over this place?

[Shane]

Yes. That's what I was thinking too. I was thinking something like, maybe he wants control of Sigil, who is run by, like, a demigod, but we won't get into that. But the reason I was thinking is, like, he's opening these portals that are bringing monsters into the arena, and he's making these people fight it.

[Amanda]

But, like, why is he doing that?

[Shane]

And the portals are the doors. The portals are the doors Got it. You could also have it be like a rogue door. Like a door. Like the door itself is a villain. Like one of the doors is like all the other doors. Yes.

[Amanda]

Ooh, I kinda like that. Also. What if he just has that sick kind of entertainment side? Like, he loves to see them fight, but what if there's conflict where he has someone go through the portal and it's someone that he knows, and it's from his past, and he cares about that person, but he's already set it up so they had to fight, so he's like, the villain is now faced with conflict. So now that person is someone he cares about, is now in this world of fighting. So it makes him another version of a villain, too.

[Shane]

Yes. That could be like an NPC that I drop in. It could maybe like, his estranged daughter or son or something. And like, oops, I brought all these monsters in, and now my son is out there and like, all the characters.

[Amanda]

That he doesn't have a relationship really with.

[Shane]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Amanda]

And he's trying to have a relationship with, but maybe there's a stepmother who's also the villain.

[Shane]

Hold on. Let her cook. Let her cook.

[Amanda]

The stepmother's like, I don't want to see that child in that arena ever again. And he now has, like, conflict with her, and now who's the bigger villain? Him? Or has it always been her?

[Shane]

I'm tempted to not make the Big Bad a woman that comes in at the last second instead of the guy.

[Amanda]

I guess that's just my weird.

[Shane]

Oh, it's actually not the guy. It's a woman's fault. It's not the capital guy.

[Amanda]

Listen, that's just me wanting to play the woman.

[Shane]

You're welcome to come in and play the stepmother.

[Amanda]

No, but I feel like that's. Does that help?

[Shane]

Yeah, I mean, absolutely. I think that bringing family members in and they could even give hints, like, oh, sure, all the characters, all the employees here at Smosh are going to be killing the monsters, but they obviously won't kill this child or mother or something that comes in through the portal. Right. And then they can drop hints at backstories like, hey, this guy isn't who you think he is. He's actually bringing the monsters here for a nefarious purpose. The owner of the Colosseum, people think.

[Amanda]

That the owner is like. Some of them think he's good.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah. So he introduced himself in, like, the first session, and he was like, hey, guys. Really sucks that you're here, but you guys are kind of, like, tied to this portal. And, like, so he's, like, giving this, like. Like, face that he's a good guy.

[Amanda]

But he's bringing them in.

[Shane]

He's bringing them in, and he's bringing the monsters, too. You also have all these portals, all these different realms. Is there a realm of, like, the bizarro evil versions of all the players? Ooh, I love that. Because also, this is, you know, this is season one. Like, you know, you don't want to, like, go too big, right? This is. That's, like, a great, like, initial start of, like, they. Because this is, like, still their character arcs are fresh. You want to, like, build them out, like, see what's the opposite of them, have them overcome themselves.

[Amanda]

He's a version of them coming in, and you're like, hello. And that's, like, the end of season one.

[Shane]

Yeah. And those versions think they're the heroes. You're the villains. Yeah, exactly. It's a spider man thing.

[Amanda]

Wait, I love that. And the villain just wants to control the place and wants to, like, have sick entertainment for himself. Hell, yeah.

[Shane]

I think that'll work.

[Amanda]

This sounds like so much fun.

[Shane]

Yeah, it's a blast. Shane, you made your character. I've made my character. We just. We have D and D. And I'm always, like, filming on the days of. And I'm like, I'm tired. I know, 100%, but I want to go so bad. I'm so excited for it. Well, the next time you're available, you'll just jump in the game. You'll come through a port. Be great. Yeah, I made a little satyr who writes poems.

[Amanda]

Oh, that's very sweet.

[Shane]

Yes.

[Amanda]

A bard.

[Shane]

Yes. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Look at that.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Amanda]

I play D and D. Holy shit.

[Shane]

Look at her go.

[Amanda]

I hope that helps.

[Shane]

Yes, absolutely. Thank you, guys. Thank you.

[Amanda]

Amazing. Thank you. Wow, this is so fun. There's so many different things.

[Shane]

I know.

[Amanda]

My brain is working.

[Shane]

Yeah. We solved everyone's problems except Aaron's.

[Amanda]

We're working on it. We're working on all that we're working on with Aaron. We're working on it.

[Shane]

All right, we have our next client.

[Amanda]

Nicole. Nicole. Nicole Press. Like, hi, Nicole. I'm wearing my little teddy bear in honor of the naf.

[Shane]

Oh, thank you.

[Amanda]

Thank you. How's it going?

[Shane]

Pretty good.

[Amanda]

I have an issue that I've been having or I haven't been having. It's been a new thing. People have been saying that my voice sounds AI generated.

[Shane]

People have been saying your voice sounds AI generated. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Do you think my voice sounds AI Generated. First of all, I don't see that totally as a negative thing. That sounds kind of hot to me. Just a little bit. Okay. Because I feel like it sounds, like, futuristic, where it's like, hello, Come join us in this little place. There's kind of a sexy characteristic to it. Okay. But also, it's your voice, right?

[Shane]

Yeah. I would say. I feel like you're very conscious of how you speak. You're very careful. You're choosing your words. You're thinking as you're speaking. And so maybe some people take that as that way. I don't know.

[Amanda]

Yeah. How do you feel about that? I don't like it, but. Or I guess that's a good thing that I'm like.

[Shane]

I just don't know about AI.

[Amanda]

I feel like I've had, like, lots of people say things about me, but AI Generated voice is a very new concept. Also. I'm from Texas, and all of my family has, like, thick southern accents. But everyone says, like, I sound so Californian.

[Shane]

I. I don't.

[Amanda]

Yeah, because you don't have a southern accent.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

What do they sound like? They're, like, really Southern, like.

[Shane]

And you never had that accent?

[Amanda]

I think I did.

[Shane]

Or.

[Amanda]

I don't know. I think in trying to make my voice sound more feminine, like, I kind of got rid of my accent, I.

[Shane]

Guess a lot of people. But I know a lot of people because even, you know, Damian's from. From Georgia, and he lost his accent, I think, over time here. He talks about sometimes when he sees his family, he, like, gets it back a little bit. I also think that's a normal thing.

[Amanda]

But I lost my accent, for sure. I didn't really have a super strong accent, but when I go home, it's like. It's very, like, up here, like, math has been.

[Shane]

You step off the airplane, you're like, all right, you fuck.

[Amanda]

Yeah. Like, fucking fight me and tell me, like, that's not a very pretty accent. So I think it's cute.

[Shane]

I think it's sexy.

[Amanda]

Thank you.

[Shane]

So how many people have said this to you? Is this maybe just one jerk or.

[Amanda]

No, it's been a. Multiple people have commented it.

[Shane]

Like, multiple. Okay, I have a thought. Yeah. Cause so this is comments on the Anthony Padilla channel.

[Amanda]

Yes. On that.

[Shane]

All right. I think what that might be is that you aren't seen as often, right?

[Amanda]

Yes.

[Shane]

So without seeing your face. I think that's also. I think this is more indicative of how AI voices on the Internet are affecting our interpretation of things.

[Amanda]

They're Trying to sound like people. Like normal, regular people, everyday people.

[Shane]

That's a good point. I think this is more like our perception of stuff is getting messed up. You know, an example I can think of is, you know, when Courtney and I did our. Posted our photos, people genuinely. Yeah, people. People. There were a lot of people who were convinced that they were AI images. They were like, this looks AI. You can see this is AI. I'm like, we're getting messed up now.

[Amanda]

I think people are freaking out about AI and they're using any opportunity to be. That's AI. It feels like a paranoid comment to me rather than like a straight up dig. But also, if you don't like it, you have every right to be like, I do not sound like an AI voice. Here's my face. I don't mind. I guess it's definitely better than being called slurs, I guess on good comments.

[Shane]

Yeah, I get that.

[Amanda]

Because I've gotten that. I'm good for that.

[Shane]

I get that. I see that.

[Amanda]

So I think it's like, if you.

[Shane]

Think about it, that's better.

[Amanda]

Yeah, I can see that.

[Shane]

And also, having been on assumptions, you are also just very careful to make the questions heard and understandable for us. And I think in that process, I guess that's how people's interpretation. I think it's you being good at your job.

[Amanda]

I do too. Thank you. And also, I think your voice cuts through a lot of other voices. Do you know what I mean? Like, your voice has, like this strength and kind of like leader, leadership voice.

[Shane]

Oh, my God.

[Amanda]

And also, the comments are just people that don't know who you are.

[Shane]

Yeah, that's true.

[Amanda]

And I do have. I actually do have a vocal coaching.

[Shane]

Appointment in May that I'm gonna go to.

[Amanda]

Really?

[Shane]

Oh.

[Amanda]

Maybe that will solve my problem. What are you gonna focus on? Just being more normal? Just sounding more normal. I guess we all need one of those.

[Shane]

I will say, though, for a year now, I have never thought that. And I would not think ever that you need coaching.

[Amanda]

Exactly. And also, like, doing voiceover. All they want are unique voices. They don't want normal voices. They want unique voice. You have a unique, beautiful voice. Oh, my God.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

You're solving my problem by making me feel better about myself. Nice. Yay. Okay, good. Good luck on your vocal session. I will. You sound amazing. What are you thinking?

[Shane]

Oh, my God.

[Amanda]

Come on, people. Yeah. AIs are.

[Shane]

I think people are really.

[Amanda]

They're really.

[Shane]

They're getting messed up.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

We can't tell what's real. Or not anymore.

[Amanda]

No, we can't. Okay. We have our next person. All right, Josh.

[Shane]

Josh is here.

[Amanda]

Josh Flurry.

[Shane]

Josh dressed up for this occasion.

[Amanda]

He always looks good.

[Shane]

Yeah, but he's wearing a tie. It's so cool.

[Amanda]

Yeah, it's his vibe.

[Shane]

Yeah. Thanks for having me. I've always wanted to be on the podcast. I just wish it was kind of under happier circumstances.

[Amanda]

Oh, no.

[Shane]

Oh, boy.

[Amanda]

Oh, God. This is a heavy.

[Shane]

Yeah, Sorry.

[Amanda]

Strap in.

[Shane]

Okay. Sorry if I'm gonna bring down a room. I've been working at Smosh for about two years now. Like, this month.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. At least when I started freelancing. It's been great. You know, I love all the stuff we do, the people we work with, but there's been one person on our team who's. It's hard to admit this, but they've been essentially bullying me and treating me negatively. Okay. It's tough to bring this up, because I know this person's been working here longer than I have. They have a lot of authority. A lot of people here are really close with him. I know you're actually really close with this person, so. But it's gotten to a point where it's really affecting me, like, physically, mentally, it's affecting my personal life, my work. So I just wanted to get it out there. So I've been getting bullied by Peter Ditzler.

[Amanda]

And swear to God, Peter.

[Shane]

Yeah, you actually haven't said that in a while. So I think that's why he's been getting a little out of control. But pretty much, you know, from day one, like, when I first came into interview, he was at the front door of the building, and then he was like, what are you doing here? Sorry. I'm sorry.

[Amanda]

That sounds like something Peter would say.

[Shane]

Yeah. And I was like, oh, you know, I have an interview with Lisa. And he was like, oh, I'll be sure to let her know you're here. And then he closed the door, and then wouldn't let me in for an hour. But then eventually I got the job after working a few freelance projects, as Peter said, for chump change. And eventually we found out. Peter and I. Actually. Some people know this. Peter and I actually graduated from the same college. We both went to Temple University. And when he found that out, he called the school and told them that I had forged a lot of my documents, and they tried to rescind my diploma.

[Amanda]

What?

[Shane]

Cause they trusted Peter immediately. They did.

[Amanda]

I'm getting fired up.

[Shane]

Yeah. It's a lot of crazy things. I Have a little short list of some things.

[Amanda]

You have, like, seven cue cards. The writing looks tight.

[Shane]

That's really, really tight. Yeah, some of these are a little hard to revisit. Peter once stole my parking pass decal, and my car got towed. Yeah, he told me to take off my mask when we all went to that pirate show because I looked like a soft bitch. And. And then that's actually once I took my mask off. That's when I got Covid so bad, I went to the hospital for a week. Okay, so this one.

[Amanda]

This one, our little Peter.

[Shane]

Yeah, this one's kind of tough for me to revisit. Can you read this one? Actually?

[Amanda]

Sure. On my birthday the other month, people met up after work to celebrate. Peter showed up, his eyes glowing red. Clearly he'd already been drinking for several hours already. I introduced him to my fiance, and he looked at her and said, why don't you dump this chump for a scrumptious hump? Then. Then he shoved me to the ground and beat me in front of her for. For eight minutes.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

So he's not only attacking you, he's attacking your fiance.

[Shane]

Yeah. And she. You know, she doesn't really look at me the same anymore after that. And when I ask, you know, when are we gonna start planning the wedding? She's like, well, you know, after talking to Peter.

[Amanda]

After talking to that scrumptious hump.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah, it is pretty wild. I've tried to get evidence, but for some reason, it's always when people aren't looking is when he comes like, this was at lunch the other day. This is him on his way, you know, to do what he usually does to me. Yep. He's really. Yep.

[Amanda]

He's just walking out.

[Shane]

So intimidating. He's really out of line. Yeah. No, I mean, he's the only person at Smosh who consistently is smoking cigarettes inside the building.

[Amanda]

He smokes so many cigarettes.

[Shane]

You gotta stop him. Yeah.

[Amanda]

I'm like, can I use the bathroom? And he's in there freaking smoking his cigarette. He does it all in one puff.

[Shane]

Yeah. No, the. The fire. He. He's setting the fire alarms off on purpose. He's psychotic. Cigarette smoke doesn't. He just grabs it and pulls the handle. So I guess, you know, I don't want him get fired or anything or lose his job. I just. I guess, one, I'd like him to stop, and two, I'd like him to understand that he's a bad person. Right. And we'll get rid of the problem. Yeah, we're Gonna go to the local Harley Davidson and enlist the help of a biker gang. You know their location, Harley Davidson. And we're gonna. We're gonna take care of it.

[Amanda]

We'll get rid of the problem.

[Shane]

Don't worry.

[Amanda]

If you know what I'm saying.

[Shane]

Don't worry. I appreciate that, guys. Yeah.

[Amanda]

You know what I'm saying? Hey, we're so sorry.

[Shane]

Thank you. Sorry, Josh.

[Amanda]

And he. Scrumptious hump. That's.

[Shane]

That's awful.

[Amanda]

His ego got way too big.

[Shane]

Yeah, I mean, I'm gonna say that from now on, but, you know. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Well, thanks, Josh.

[Shane]

Thank you, guys. Don't worry about it.

[Amanda]

Don't worry about it. Literally, don't worry about it.

[Shane]

Don't worry about it.

[Amanda]

Don't worry about it.

[Shane]

It's going to be taken care of.

[Amanda]

Don't worry about it. I'm from Boston.

[Shane]

Thank you. Thank you, guys.

[Amanda]

Swim with the fishes.

[Shane]

Gosh. Wow, Peter.

[Amanda]

Being a therapist is hard.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

I don't think. I don't think I can actually be a therapist, because I would. Unfortunately, I laughed way too much.

[Amanda]

You literally can't. You can't be a therapist.

[Shane]

You beat me up for eight minutes. I like. Yeah, that's awful.

[Amanda]

Big problem. Okay, next up, we have Emily.

[Shane]

Emily.

[Amanda]

Hi, Emily. Longtime listener, first time caller, didn't say that in front of the mic. Super professional. Thanks for helping me. Well, we're so happy to have you here, Emily. Thank you. Tell us what's going on with you. Well, you both are successful comedians and in successful careers, and. Are we? Yes. Put that in writing. I want to get back on dating apps, but the thing that's stopping me is that anytime I read a prompt, I overthink it. So I'm like, I don't know how to balance being funny. I don't know how to balance being flirty. I don't know. What do people want? I personally think I feel like people want someone who's authentic and genuine. I think that being too funny on those dating apps with, like, prompts might be a little cringe.

[Shane]

Ooh, interesting take.

[Amanda]

Do you know what I'm saying? Only. Only from looking at friends, like, when they show me some of the prompts, when I'm like, oh, that's hilarious. Okay. I can't help but think about them sitting there thinking about it forever and, like, writing it down. Be, like, so proud of themselves. To me, Amanda, that's a little bit cringe. So I don't think you need to think so hard about what's the funniest thing. Could you help me workshop some? I have some prompts here. Hell, yeah.

[Shane]

Can we pitch? Can we pitch?

[Amanda]

Would you agree with that or.

[Shane]

I sort of do. I think dating apps are weird. I've been vocal about not loving them, but I almost think if for women, it's the issue of there's so many shitty dudes that if you write something that's very authentic and real to who you are and you're like, oh, I wonder if this is gonna, like, push away a lot of people. It's like, maybe that's actually the goal. You don't want to deal with all the shitty dudes. You want to push them away and only bring in the people who are genuine into your personality.

[Amanda]

That's what I think. Okay, let's see what we're working with. So, okay, I'll fall for you if Blank.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Something fun. Something. The way to win me over Blank. Fart in front of me. Okay. Okay. The way to win me over Way.

[Shane]

To win me over I don't think.

[Amanda]

I'd be successful on dating apps. Let's just be real. The way to win me over.

[Shane]

Step into the world of power, loyalty, and luck.

[Amanda]

I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse.

[Shane]

With family. Cannoli and spins mean everything.

[Amanda]

Now you want to get mixed up in the family business.

[Shane]

Introducing the [e-mail] test your luck in the shadowy world of the Godfather slot.

[Amanda]

Someday, I will call upon you to do a service for me.

[Shane]

Play the Godfather [e-mail]. welcome to the family. No purchase necessary. VGW Group void. We're prohibited by law 21 plus terms and conditions apply. Okay. The way to win me over. Wow. I think Amanda and I have met our match on.

[Amanda]

Please help. No, no, no, no. The way to win me over yeah, okay. The way to win me over. I want to say something about, like, listen. Listen more. But that's just like me being so genuine. Honestly, I'm still going with fart in front of me. We'll see what happens.

[Shane]

Okay. See, I'm thinking if you wait, it wouldn't be over.

[Amanda]

Fart in front of me. We'll see what happens.

[Shane]

I'm almost. My head's going, like, take away the prompts. I'm thinking knowing you, like, having some sort of Skyrim quote in there or something like that.

[Amanda]

Literally, though, I actually think I can't wait to figure out what that is.

[Shane]

Well, funny ask.

[Amanda]

Funny you ask. I am wearing an amulet of Mara, which does mean That I am available for marriage. There's your fucking promise. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, use a real prompt that you would say. You are naturally funny. Like, I can't come up with something that you're. That is directly from your heart. That is hilarious.

[Shane]

I know, though. Hinge has those prompts.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

So you almost need them.

[Amanda]

They're crazy. Yeah. Okay, what's the first one? What's the first one?

[Shane]

I have a few of them.

[Amanda]

They're like, dating me is like blank. Dating me is like a sad carnival that comes to that. Run down Macy's in your town. It's fun for a few hours and if you stick around, maybe you'll get.

[Shane]

Something better out of it.

[Amanda]

Don't.

[Shane]

Don't do that. Okay? We've solved the problem. Don't do that.

[Amanda]

Genuine. Do not do that.

[Shane]

No, don't go negative.

[Amanda]

Don't, don't, don't go negative. No, no, negative.

[Shane]

Go negative. Do not. I think, look, I love self deprecating humor, but if it's self deprecating, it shouldn't be like, truly, like, it should still show that you're very confident and.

[Amanda]

Do that in person. Do that in person so they can see your face when you're doing it, because it's hilarious. But like, I would say do something where try to elicit a response of just like, huh, that's fun. Have them, like, feel something good.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

That's what I would say. Rather than the Macy's thing. So. Yeah, we figured that out.

[Shane]

Yeah. Okay. We got that one.

[Amanda]

Okay. Yeah. Hey, I'm still going with the fart. What else? The one thing I'd love to know about you is what is the one thing you'd love someone to know about you?

[Shane]

Yeah. Oh, or what I want to learn about somebody else.

[Amanda]

I think that you should have someone who knows you interview you about this, like, ask you this question and then respond first thing and then respond second thing. So what's the answer to that?

[Shane]

The one thing I'd love you to know about me is.

[Amanda]

That I really love my job and that I really, like, put a lot of energy and focus into my job. And my job is important to me. I love that. And I want some. And I want somebody else who has like a similar. Like, you don't got to care about, like, you don't have to be super.

[Shane]

Passionate about your career, but there's got.

[Amanda]

To be something that you're very passionate about. Because I am drawn to passionate people.

[Shane]

That's great, dude.

[Amanda]

What are you Talking about you're winning me over. Yeah, I'm swiping left. Very confident.

[Shane]

Thank you.

[Amanda]

Is it right? Is it right? Is it right? Right means good, right?

[Shane]

Speaking app. Advice from the person who hasn't used the Internet since it was created.

[Amanda]

I. I had a Gateway 2000, and I had a fun time on that. Well, thank you both. That helps. But literally, no, truly, ask people that really know you well to ask you that. Prompt and come up with the first thing and then come up with the second thing. Write it down and be like, okay, fuck it. I love it. Thank you. You can filter out the idiots. Get you out of your head. Yeah, Swipe right. Right. Yes, yes, yes, yes. That's what I meant to say. Okay.

[Shane]

All right. Thank you.

[Amanda]

Thank you. I'll give an update. I'm gonna.

[Shane]

I'll put the.

[Amanda]

I'll put the fart. I'll put the fart one on my profile, and we'll see what happens. Yeah, let's see if you really feel that. Oh, God.

[Shane]

Oh.

[Amanda]

Okay, our next person is Angela.

[Shane]

It's Angela.

[Amanda]

And she. I'm gonna need some major help. Okay, so he's at the point right now. It's okay. Oh, no.

[Shane]

It doesn't stop. The sound. Doesn't stop.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

And the sound, it really hit.

[Amanda]

Really? So I have to see if he needs burping.

[Shane]

Is the baby the announcer from snl? Oh, it's a musical guest.

[Amanda]

You shove a key in its back.

[Shane]

You know what? I actually am here for help because.

[Amanda]

The help I need is, like, just a babysitter. So if you want to.

[Shane]

If you want to.

[Amanda]

It's the moon card, but also it's chosen.

[Shane]

Yeah, his name is chosen.

[Amanda]

Yeah, his name is Cho.

[Shane]

Cho.

[Amanda]

Say it again.

[Shane]

Cho. Cho.

[Amanda]

Why does everyone think that's funny? It's short for chosen. Sounds like Choed.

[Shane]

Yeah. Choi. What about Joey Choi? Joey. I don't know.

[Amanda]

Okay, so you need to insert one of these and find out what he needs. A mother could take a break.

[Shane]

That's not how. So you insert a key card and to determine what the baby wants. I. I don't think that's how motherhood babies work.

[Amanda]

Yes, it is. Everything's an app these days. Can I say. Can I say that we predicted what? I just need to take a nap. It's been all day. Scott loves this sound.

[Shane]

Yeah, Scott's having a great time.

[Amanda]

This is awful. You guys mind if I leave him with you when I go shower?

[Shane]

No.

[Amanda]

Can I just say that we predicted a smosh baby?

[Shane]

Yes. Our prediction Of a smosh. Baby came true. Cuz this counts.

[Amanda]

You have to be careful because it's gonna give me a report of abuse at the end. Oh, if I.

[Shane]

No.

[Amanda]

Legit. Legit.

[Shane]

So at least if the report comes up, just be like, no. My friend Amanda is.

[Amanda]

How often do you have horrible. Like when. When I shove the key in. Don't put. Also don't put the panic key in. Let's try Shane. I did put the panic. You just don't have the. Shane, maybe you just don't have to talk. So what is your problem?

[Shane]

Okay?

[Amanda]

Besides I. I need a freaking nap.

[Shane]

That's my problem.

[Amanda]

So you've been taking care of this baby for how many hours now? A lot. So what. What have you learned? I started this video out being like, motherhood's easy and joke's on me, huh? There's your clip.

[Shane]

It's.

[Amanda]

It's a lot because also you think when you walk around the office that everyone's gonna be like, hi, let me hang out. Everyone's putting their head down being like, diaper change. You gotta really jam it in there, Shane. And do you think it's because I'm.

[Shane]

Afraid of hurting it?

[Amanda]

It's already hurt. I'm its mother.

[Shane]

I don't know.

[Amanda]

I don't know. So what's your biggest problem? Mine is having a crying baby consistently that you weren't sure you were gonna have. I think it's just hard to work and be a mom at the same time. Oh, amen to that, sister. Am I right? We thought superheroes were in Marvel movies. No, they're at the home.

[Shane]

Hey.

[Amanda]

He just had to look at him. I just look at Joe. Wait.

[Shane]

Just needed to think, just needed to focus.

[Amanda]

Oh, my God. Well, it's been great seeing you guys. Wait, you're not done here. I'm just gonna keep him. Wait a second. Get your ass back here. Did he butt.

[Shane]

Do you guys have like a remote somewhere? Was this a prank?

[Amanda]

No, no, We've tried to manipulate it. I guess stress does not help the baby because I was really stressed out shoving the keys in there. What did you do when you looked at it?

[Shane]

I don't know. I just picked him up.

[Amanda]

Oh, my God. Shane is reminding of my dad. The babies will be crying and my dad will pick up a baby and be like, you just need to nap. And the baby would be like, take me, Lord.

[Shane]

Did you insert the cards? I feel like I couldn't get the.

[Amanda]

Cards in because if you put attention in, sometimes you laugh.

[Shane]

I tried to put attention in, but then gave up on it. And then I just kind of picked him up. Look at Bubba.

[Amanda]

Turn him around so we can see you with him.

[Shane]

Oh. Oh, okay. And this is also crying again here.

[Amanda]

That he's supposed to have his little chosen.

[Shane]

Oh, there he is.

[Amanda]

He looks like Meghan Trainor's baby.

[Shane]

He kind of looks like. Kind of looks like baby geniuses.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. Which he is putting down, bud.

[Amanda]

Let's put your hands down. Okay, well, let's not put your hands down. So you're. So the biggest problem is being a working mom and having a baby.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

It was just hard. I had to take a meeting for the games channel, and it's just hard to focus. I guess solving it is just having.

[Shane]

Shane.

[Amanda]

Shane. Wow, look at you.

[Shane]

Glad I solved this problem after failing at dating apps.

[Amanda]

Wow. Okay. Well, thank you, guys. I really appreciated it. Shane. It's like, wow. What an attractive quality. I love it.

[Shane]

Problem. Good luck, baby.

[Amanda]

This is incredible.

[Shane]

I don't. I. I don't know what's going on. Yeah, this is.

[Amanda]

I'm scared to pick him up, and he's gonna start crying. You just have calm energy.

[Shane]

You're gonna be fine. Hey, believe in yourself.

[Amanda]

Thank you. I think you just have. Well, good. Best of luck to you. You look great. Like, you look great. Yeah, it's.

[Shane]

It's.

[Amanda]

Yeah. For having a baby. Looks great. Okay, Bob, we're going in. Okay. Oh, he's got a katana, too.

[Shane]

Oh, nice.

[Amanda]

Oh, yeah. Give a baby a sword that works.

[Shane]

There you go.

[Amanda]

Yeah. Art department offered this, and I said no. Cause I'm a good mother. Good. But then you just gave it to him. No, I just keep it in here for bits. Oh, smart.

[Shane]

As long as your parental supervision.

[Amanda]

All right, let's see.

[Shane]

Oh, my God. Please start crying. That was so funny.

[Amanda]

Please start crying.

[Shane]

Well, there you go.

[Amanda]

Where are the keys? You have all the keys.

[Shane]

Good job.

[Amanda]

Yes, I have all the keys.

[Shane]

Good job, Cho.

[Amanda]

Everybody give it up for Cho. Cho doesn't. I love baby Cho.

[Shane]

How long was he crying for? That was.

[Amanda]

That was. That was our longest cry, and you fixed it, so.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

I'll make sure to find you again.

[Shane]

All right. Love you guys.

[Amanda]

Love you, too. Good luck with everything.

[Shane]

Good luck.

[Amanda]

Sorry I put my feet on the table that you were.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

About to have a baby out of everyone here.

[Shane]

It's.

[Amanda]

It's a wild choice. Yeah, it is a wild choice, but it's excellent. A wild choice. Love y'all.

[Shane]

Love y'all. All right.

[Amanda]

So calm now.

[Shane]

That is gonna Be one wild smosh pit video.

[Amanda]

Well, at least we predicted a smosh baby.

[Shane]

And, hey, we gotta mark that off.

[Amanda]

Yeah, we do.

[Shane]

That's real. Okay, next up, we have Matt Duran here.

[Amanda]

Duran Duran. Get in here. Isn't it your birthday this month?

[Shane]

It is. April 22nd. Earth Day. Oh, the baby's crying again.

[Amanda]

Oh, the moment she walked away from Shane, the baby started crying.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah.

[Amanda]

Shane, did you know you had a baby touch? Anyways, what's going on, Duran?

[Shane]

Oh, my God. I've been dealing with this issue for, like, 20 years. I'm very excited to hear what you guys think.

[Amanda]

I'm so glad we're getting this very cooked. Okay.

[Shane]

All right.

[Amanda]

What's going on?

[Shane]

My dad is dead. All right. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Amanda]

When did your dad die?

[Shane]

20 years ago. Okay.

[Amanda]

And how do you feel?

[Shane]

I feel okay, but I oftentimes kind of think, you know, it'd be nice to have a dad for a moment.

[Amanda]

For just a second. Right.

[Shane]

And then I saw the way you were handling baby Cho over here, Shane, and it made me think about it sitting over on their couch again. Just like. There's that moment again of like, man, it would have been nice to be, like, I could sit on my dad's lap for a second.

[Amanda]

You know, like, you're gonna make me cry.

[Shane]

No, if you start crying, I'll start crying.

[Amanda]

Well, I'll start crying. Okay, so are we saying that Shane can't be the solution for this, too?

[Shane]

I don't know.

[Amanda]

You can always sit on Shane's lap when you ask him. If you ask him and he says yes, you can.

[Shane]

Do I have consent to do that, Matt? You have consent? I hope the chair can hit. That's on camera. That's on camera. Come on over here, son.

[Amanda]

Go ahead.

[Shane]

Is that an open invitation for Duran Actual right now? Yeah, sure. Let's do this.

[Amanda]

I'm so. This feels like an episode where I can just chill, and that feels good for me. Wow. How do you feel?

[Shane]

How was work today, son? It was good. I mean, it was kind of busy, too, so I was kind of stressed out about that, but, yeah, I don't know. I just like being. I'm just glad that I'm here with you now. Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better. Good. You're not getting bullied by Peter, are you?

[Amanda]

Please say no.

[Shane]

No, Peter and I are tight. I don't know how to feel about that.

[Amanda]

He's a bully.

[Shane]

He told me I'm not a soft bitch, so. Okay. I feel like there's you know, and.

[Amanda]

You know, people who lose their dads aren't, you know, they become really hard bitches.

[Shane]

What? Yeah.

[Amanda]

I'm gonna grab the video camera.

[Shane]

Amanda, let me be a father here, okay?

[Amanda]

Yeah, no worries. Gotcha. Go, go, go.

[Shane]

You know what? It's okay to be a soft bitch sometimes. In fact, that's important.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I do feel like I have become a little hardened, you know? Yeah.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Maybe a little too hardened.

[Amanda]

Probably. Probably. I mean, more hardened now that you're with Shane.

[Shane]

No, I think I'm softening up a little bit.

[Amanda]

That's what we want. It's okay to cry. I think men need to cry more. I totally agree. And it's okay to cry about people that you've lost, including your dad.

[Shane]

Absolutely.

[Amanda]

How do you feel now?

[Shane]

I mean, I feel really great to have that little moment. Yeah. That was like what it's like to sit on my dad's lap again.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. So, yeah. Thank you for just a little moment of that.

[Amanda]

Yeah. How do we find more moments like that?

[Shane]

I don't know. That's. Is it an open invitation to sit on your lap whenever I need it or.

[Amanda]

I don't know the answer to that.

[Shane]

Sure. Okay.

[Amanda]

But let's find other laps.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

That we can maybe ask for because his lap might get tired.

[Shane]

Yeah. That is true. And in many ways, here at Smosh, Ian is like all of our dad.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

So there's also him. And I heard his lap, but I know he's. Yeah. Okay. Maybe I had to ask him.

[Amanda]

Yeah, you should ask him.

[Shane]

I'll ask him.

[Amanda]

Definitely ask him.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Ian's lap.

[Shane]

But. But we're here for you. I'm here for you.

[Amanda]

Thank you.

[Shane]

And Amanda's here to say all sorts of crazy shit. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Yeah, I'm here to, like, you know, distract.

[Shane]

Well, I need that.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Amanda]

Well, you know, you can sit on my lap maybe.

[Shane]

Oh.

[Amanda]

Sometimes.

[Shane]

Great.

[Amanda]

All right.

[Shane]

Well, I hope we helped solve your problem.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Cool. I was hoping for, like, maybe you could bring him back fully, but.

[Amanda]

Yeah, that's going to take a lot more time and a lot more money.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

And we have to do it at a full moon, man.

[Shane]

It's like a more permanent tarot, Right?

[Amanda]

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe at the full moon we can call him in.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Yeah, we're gonna need a team for that.

[Shane]

Great.

[Amanda]

I'll come back then.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

Okay, we'll get to work on that.

[Amanda]

Yeah, we'll get to work.

[Shane]

On that. Thank you so much. I appreciate it.

[Amanda]

Duran Duran. You're welcome.

[Shane]

Thank you. All right.

[Amanda]

Thank you, Duran.

[Shane]

You're welcome, son.

[Amanda]

Oh, yeah.

[Shane]

Wow. Twice I've been a father. Like, a whole lifetime of being a father.

[Amanda]

I've been a father twice. And I realized I keep trying to help when sometimes I just need to sit back and let you take over.

[Shane]

I had a baby. Suddenly my son was my age.

[Amanda]

There's a lot of things happening.

[Shane]

I don't know what's going on.

[Amanda]

You got married, and babies just came in.

[Shane]

There's babies everywhere. All right, next client. Okay, we have Rock here.

[Amanda]

Rock is here. Hi, Rock.

[Shane]

Hello, Rock. How you guys doing?

[Amanda]

How are you?

[Shane]

Oh, I'm good. I'm good. But I got a bit of an issue.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

But I've also been dealing with my entire life. Oh, okay. It's less silly than a dead dad. Less silly?

[Amanda]

Less silly is the word I would. Yeah.

[Shane]

Okay. But, yeah. So I'm kind of, like, in a cycle of feeling inauthentic. When I want to promote myself and try to be successful. I do a lot of things outside of Smosh, outside of my job, because I crave that success in some way. But whenever I start to promote or get in front of people's faces, it's like, hey, do you like me? Do you like this? Do you like me? Do you like this? I feel like a piece of shit, and I can't stand doing that. It makes you feel really fake.

[Amanda]

I understand that completely.

[Shane]

I totally understand it, too. It's. It's easy for us at Smosh, like, to promote Smosh. So I'm like, ah. It's like.

[Amanda]

It's because we have Smosh behind us.

[Shane]

I work at this place a little bit. Like, it's like. There's, like. It's. But it's hard to promote yourself. Yeah, I. It's. It's kind of. It's kind of weird, too, because, like, it's. It's. It's also, like, my accomplishments in a lot of. In a lot of ways, I see the things that I do outside as, like. As I should. My personal accomplishments.

[Amanda]

But.

[Shane]

It'S always been kind of weird. Cause as a kid or whatever, I won state champ as a wrestler. My parents weren't there to see that. No one actually came to see that. So no one ever saw it.

[Amanda]

Oh, there it is.

[Shane]

Graduated from high school. Whatever. It doesn't matter. But no one came to see that. So I've always sort of loved myself to the point where it's like, I don't need anyone's recognition. But now I'm in a position and in a job where being liked and being wanted is your measure of success. And I can't stand that. It makes me feel gross.

[Amanda]

It's tough. I completely understand. It also sounds like it has been going on for a while. You've kind of got to this place where it's like, I don't need other people in my inner circle to say that I am successful. But we do need that. We do need that recognition in order to be able to promote it in ourselves. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, we need our inner circle to be like, damn, I saw that thing that you did, and that was all you. And that was fucking amazing.

[Shane]

Yeah. And I've built a tight friend group who does boost me up. It's like I've loved myself so much where I'm like, I come off as real cocky now. I come off as a real cocky piece of shit.

[Amanda]

Understood.

[Shane]

But there's something deep down in me. There's just like, you know, I work so hard on, like, a certain thing or I'll take a year, and all I do is focus on that one thing and then I release it and no one gives a shit. And then it's like, I want people to care, but also I don't want people to go out of their way to be like, ugh. I also think, though, it's. It's to a degree, it's like, we are not our. You know, our accomplishments and who we are are separate things. So it's like loving your accomplishments and loving your hard work is. It doesn't necessarily mean that it's like, oh, I'm full of myself, or I'm cocky. It's like, no, this thing that I love. Cause I know you and Andre made your D and D show and, like, you guys worked really hard on it, and it's like, it's really cool thing that you guys love, and you're allowed to promote something that you love and talk about something that you love. That doesn't mean, like, by talking about this project we made, that I'm full of myself. It's like, no, I love this thing and I love it so much. Like, I want to share it with people.

[Amanda]

And it's almost like a little. I see it as like a little deal with the devil that we have to make in order to, like, get this out here. We have to be like, okay, I kinda gotta do this feeling that's a little bit gross, but over Time, it actually does get better. And what I've learned is I kind of drop little hints as I'm working on it that helps me push to work to it. But then also people are like, oh, I know that you've been working on this thing for a while. I can't wait to see it. Yeah, it's the anticipation. So I think it's like having the belief in yourself that, like, I worked on this thing and people are gonna come. People are going to see it, and I'm going to remind them, and it is a little bit of, like, all right, devil. Like, this is a bit gross. This feels a bit gross for me.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

But that's just because you just need to keep doing it. Do you know what I mean?

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah, I get it. I get it. Yeah. It's. It's still a bit of a weird gray area for me, continuously putting it out there, because there's always just that thing of just like, okay, it's out there now, and I'm still not getting.

[Amanda]

Getting the response you want.

[Shane]

Getting the response that I was hoping for. Not necessarily like, I want it or I need it. It was just like, your ex is okay. I did tell everyone about this. I did do all these things or whatever, and it just fizzles every single time. And as I jump to thing to thing, and I'm like, not hoping to get people to like it, but it's like, it's genuinely things that I love to do, but those things have to have people like it to be successful. That's the gross part.

[Amanda]

That is the gross part. And I honestly feel like it's so complicated, but it's like you never, I think, putting so much effort on the expectation. If you maybe try a little bit to release that a little bit, you may be able to just do it and move on to the next thing and just do it and do it. Because that's the weird thing. We don't know what's gonna be successful. We don't know.

[Shane]

It also speaks to, like, one of the things I hate most about just the Internet and YouTube and stuff is that a lot of the best. A lot of my favorite things on YouTube have not received the recognition that they deserve. Like, a lot of the biggest things on YouTube are some of the most garbage creatives, and some of the funniest, most creative works that I've seen don't get the views and stuff. But that's also understanding that the reaction to a work does not. That's not the worth of that work exactly.

[Amanda]

Exactly.

[Shane]

But it is also the frustrating part. Yeah.

[Amanda]

You're putting stuff out there that is super, super successful in my eyes. Like, how do we release a little bit of the expectation just for your own heart.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

Do you know what I mean?

[Shane]

Cause that's exhausting.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. It's very tiring.

[Amanda]

You're doing a great job.

[Shane]

That's the pain of an artist. Yep. Bleeding always.

[Amanda]

You're doing a great job.

[Shane]

But, yeah. Thank you, guys. I appreciate that.

[Amanda]

Anytime.

[Shane]

Thank you.

[Amanda]

I was really into that. I was, like, ready to go for an hour.

[Shane]

Yeah. Damn. All right.

[Amanda]

All right. Our next guest is Trevor. Trevor. New Smosh member.

[Shane]

I didn't get a single clap.

[Amanda]

Wait, I.

[Shane]

That's brutal. That is brutal. Wow. Oh, Coney Island. Hey. There you go.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Thank you, Trevor.

[Amanda]

I clapped for you. Thank you.

[Shane]

I appreciate it.

[Amanda]

How are you doing?

[Shane]

Doing good. Yeah. Do you guys wanna guess my problem? Okay.

[Amanda]

You got a haircut and you have a hat on.

[Shane]

Your problem is that the Smosh audience hates you. Please don't say that.

[Amanda]

They don't.

[Shane]

No. Please don't say that. I'm gonna have another problem tonight. They really don't. They really.

[Amanda]

I don't know.

[Shane]

All right. No, I don't know. No. It's pretty serious, though. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I'm addicted to Fortnite.

[Amanda]

Okay. That is a problem.

[Shane]

Yeah. Not only are you, I have learned in these recent weeks how widespread in our office Fortnite is. Yeah. Literally everyone's playing it. Every time I turn on my PC, the little logo just talks like the Green Goblin mask. You've abandoned Runescape? No, I've not abandoned Runescape. That's just my normal daily routine. What are you. What are you playing? What are you playing more of? Runescape or Fortnite? Well, what am I playing more of? Probably Valorant. What the.

[Amanda]

So you're addicted to gaming?

[Shane]

No. No. I can quit whenever I want. I swear.

[Amanda]

Oh.

[Shane]

Except for. Okay, so wait, you're saying you're addicted to Fortnite, but you're spending more time on Valorant and Runescape? Um. Yeah. Yeah. Cause I don't consider those problems.

[Amanda]

Okay, so it's a problem because you are thinking about Fortnite 24 7.

[Shane]

No, it's a problem. Cause I don't want to be playing Fortnite anymore. You don't? Why not? I don't know. It's not good for my health. Neither is Valorant, but it's like a different kind of thing. Why are you trying to pick me apart right now? Because you came Here, man.

[Amanda]

Oh, this is. This is. This is. This is touchy. This is touchy. We have to be careful here.

[Shane]

It's not touchy.

[Amanda]

We have to be care.

[Shane]

Oh, I'm normal.

[Amanda]

Okay.

[Shane]

All right.

[Amanda]

We have to be careful here. Okay. So when did you decide that Fortnite is a problem? Did someone say it to you?

[Shane]

Well, I spent a long time, a really, really long time, probably too many hours trying to get the Peter Griffin skin. Yeah, so did Spencer and Alex and everyone else. Yeah. But not only that. I grinded to, like. Okay. Because they cheated. Okay, they bought it. They. No, they didn't buy it, but there was, like, a level exploit that they did, so they got a bunch of levels without actually playing the game. I grinded to level 150 all on my own. And then. You got it. And then how'd you feel once you got the Peter Griffin skin? Awesome. Euphoric.

[Amanda]

Oh, boy.

[Shane]

It was great.

[Amanda]

Oh, boy.

[Shane]

Okay, well, that sounds awesome.

[Amanda]

No.

[Shane]

Yeah, it was awesome. See, I don't know why you guys think this is a problem.

[Amanda]

No, it is a problem. I don't know why you spent hours on Peter Griffin's skin. What are we discussing here? What are we talking about here? There's trees growing. There's mountains. There's the wind. There's.

[Shane]

There's.

[Amanda]

There's flowers blooming. It's spring. What are we discussing? This is a problem.

[Shane]

You. You asked.

[Amanda]

We're gonna talk about it.

[Shane]

Trevor, you asked whether or not how to quit Fortnite. You asked the advice from someone who didn't know about Harambe, about your Fortnite addiction.

[Amanda]

I know what Fortnite is. It's pretty cool stuff, okay? There's a fort and there's a night in it at once.

[Shane]

So what. What do you think? How do you think Fortnite goes?

[Amanda]

It's really cool.

[Shane]

How do you think a game of Fortnite is played?

[Amanda]

So it's really cool. It's all these demons from another place and they're coming in and they are trying to distract the other player so that they can storm the castle.

[Shane]

Okay?

[Amanda]

And the castle's a fort, and it was built by a bunch of kids on a sleepover. Okay? So anyways, Trevor, this is why this is a problem. Because you said it was a problem, and we started asking you questions about it, and then you attacked us and said, it's not a problem.

[Shane]

Problem.

[Amanda]

So I think it's a problem simply because it makes you cagey.

[Shane]

It doesn't make me cagey. I'm not kg. I'm totally chill right now. I'm totally relaxed. Honestly, I didn't even think it was a problem. I was told maybe I should come on and try and get some advice.

[Amanda]

But I don't think it's. Who told you that?

[Shane]

People. I don't have to name names. Why are you trying to pick me apart? I don't know why people here would say it's a problem. Literally everybody here plays it. Yeah. Nobody here told me it was a problem. I would have got other people. Who told you? Who told you it's a problem? I don't want to talk about it.

[Amanda]

Oh, I know. Got it. I understand.

[Shane]

What?

[Amanda]

Guys, I live with a gamer, Okay? I live with a gamer. Sometimes it gets really hard when you're like, I'm trying to have a conversation with you and you are in the underworld. Okay? Like, sometimes it gets really hard. Sometimes it's like, how many hours are you wasting on this game? Like, I am here. Hello?

[Shane]

This was all bait to get Amanda talking about Fortnite. Wow. You fell into this trap.

[Amanda]

I didn't cure you.

[Shane]

So you don't feel bad at all? No, no. I don't even play Fortnite that much these days. I kind of got the Peter Griffin skin and then sort of stopped. Okay.

[Amanda]

Was I right about how Fortnite is played?

[Shane]

Not at all. Not even close. Not close at all.

[Amanda]

Well, then I can't wait to explore it.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Amanda]

Let's play it. Watch my ass.

[Shane]

We're gonna play Fortnite now. That'd be.

[Amanda]

Why do I feel like I'm in the hot seat right now? Why do you guys do. Huh? What is this? What is this? What is this? Men against Chronically Offline queen Who doesn't know video games. I'm sorry that I lived. I'm sorry that I experienced grass growing under my naked feet.

[Shane]

Oh, man.

[Amanda]

I'm sorry that I'm a fairy living in a magical world. Go, Trevor.

[Shane]

Oh, thank you.

[Amanda]

Thank you so much. You are not welcome back. This seat can never hold Trevor's ass again.

[Shane]

We're gonna have so many comments being like, amanda plays Fortnite now. Five nights at Freddy's is done. Fortnite is in.

[Amanda]

I talked myself into a hole.

[Shane]

It's okay. In no world do I care if you know what Fortnite is or how it's played. It's okay.

[Amanda]

It's fine.

[Shane]

No, it's totally fine.

[Amanda]

No, of course it's fine. I watch Tommy Lee Jones movies, okay? And that's cool.

[Shane]

I promise you, Fortnite is a million times simpler than Five Nights at Freddy's. So you've played the more complicated thing.

[Amanda]

All right.

[Shane]

Oh, last up.

[Amanda]

Oh, my God, I'm so excited about this.

[Shane]

Our director of Smoshmouth, our very own director, is here.

[Amanda]

Selena.

[Shane]

Selena. Who has the. She has one minute left. Five minutes left. One minute left.

[Amanda]

Just so we don't forget.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Selena, how are you? What's going on?

[Shane]

I'm good.

[Amanda]

This has been a great episode. First of all, thank you so much for helping us with Smoshmouth. You are an incredible director.

[Shane]

Yes, thank you so much. You've been doing everything for this, like, for, like, a month. Over a month now. You've been doing all the notes. You've been directing these episodes. You've been running this whole show.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And, guys, this is my second job. I have another job. I know. You also run the entire office, so.

[Amanda]

Yeah, she schedules everything. What's going on? So not me, but a friend. No, sorry. A friend. Friend. Was wondering how to make friends as an adult. Ooh, that's a good question.

[Shane]

If.

[Amanda]

Yeah, a friend.

[Shane]

Yeah, a friend.

[Amanda]

A friend. Not Selena. Okay, okay. How to make friends as an adult.

[Shane]

I've been thinking about this lately.

[Amanda]

Talk to me.

[Shane]

I think your passions are a great outlet for it. I am someone. My passions. I'm very internal with them. I love reading. I love certain shows, whatever. But I'm very just like, oh, that's in my own time, my own thing. But I think finding ways to connect with the community of that is so great. I always think about that whenever I've gone to conventions of just like, oh, that's so cool that these people, they love a thing, but then they find ways to find other people that love that thing, and you. You find that community for that. For that passion. So if you like cooking, it's like, go to a cooking class. Like, if you like a certain sport, like, obviously, like, you know, go find a club that's doing that. Like, finding those outlets to. To share something you love with other people, I think is such a. A great opportunity.

[Amanda]

Oh, yeah. Also, I feel like there's little. Same, like, little communities everywhere. Simply, like, going to the gym. Going to the gym. I feel like there are so many people who are, like, if you see them all the time, like, hey, what's going on with you? Or going to, like, your local coffee shop or going to the same bar or restaurant that you love, like, going there and meeting the regular people. But what if this person is, like, shy?

[Shane]

Yeah, that's why I. I'm not the gym. I've gone to. I've gone to the gym for 15 years. I have never made a friend at the gym. Oh, I'm friendly.

[Amanda]

I have like a sticker on my face. But people always like, what's your name?

[Shane]

You're also like, you're a very outgoing person and stuff. So I think, I don't think you realize how much of it might be coming from.

[Amanda]

You get really introverted. When I go to the gym, I'm usually like, yeah. So how do people become your friends?

[Shane]

I mean, I really have become friends with people through work a lot. Yeah. The acting industry is where I've met most of my friends.

[Amanda]

Restaurant industry.

[Shane]

That is truly been improv in. That has truly been. I mean, this is truly a conundrum for me because there were years when I wasn't working much and I did have like a couple of my friends that, that had been solid friends for a long time. But other than that, it was really hard for me. I had a hard time. But I will say, like, acting classes, improv classes were always the opportunities, big ones, I think. And as a shy person, it's like, that's great because I'm kind of. I'm here with them for a few weeks, so I get that that conversation naturally happens and then it makes it easier. I need to kind of put myself into those situations. And then also like that openness, that willingness and trust to be like, hey, you know, as a shy person, I think a lot of times I just, I have this thought that people don't like me or they don't want to talk to me, but going, no, most people are good or, you know, people are nice and kind and they do like me and want to spend time with me and talk to me and coming with that point of view and then giving yourself those opportunities.

[Amanda]

How shy is this person? Like, doesn't want to leave their house shy or just really doesn't like doing group activities? Because that could be a thing too. No, not like agoraphobic, but just, I don't know, like someone who's behind the camera.

[Shane]

Behind the what?

[Amanda]

Behind the camera. I see.

[Shane]

Mm.

[Amanda]

Like what. What can this person do to become your guys friend?

[Shane]

We have one minute, by the way. So you have.

[Amanda]

I think I. One minute. I know what's going on here.

[Shane]

I think I know. I think maybe this person.

[Amanda]

You want to sit on my lap?

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Wait, we got it. Yeah. Is that an actual offer? Yeah, sure, whatever.

[Shane]

Oh, okay.

[Amanda]

Oh, God.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Amanda]

What did I do? What did I do? Do you want to sit on my lap? Sure.

[Shane]

Guys. All right. This is all Selena wanted.

[Amanda]

Yeah.

[Shane]

This is.

[Amanda]

Guys, is this friendship?

[Shane]

This is. This is friendship right here.

[Amanda]

This is friendship. Because I know you.

[Shane]

I'm pretty certain. Amanda myself, I'm gonna walk down the.

[Amanda]

Street and people are like, yo, can I sit on your lap?

[Shane]

Yeah. You started it, Selena. I'm pretty sure Amanda was. Amanda and I were your friends at the start of this.

[Amanda]

That's what I thought.

[Shane]

I think for a lot longer than this podcast has been going well, you email me.

[Amanda]

You get in contact with me more than my mother. Like, come on. That's true. We talk every day. Yeah, we do. You were my friend. So this was for you. Not a friend. No, it's for a friend. Okay.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

I just randomly tonight get a knock on my dark and I sat on your lap.

[Shane]

I'm Selena's friend. I'm Jeff. All right.

[Amanda]

Love you.

[Shane]

Well, this has been Smoshmouth. We have solved a lot of problems today.

[Amanda]

Yeah, I kind of want to do, like, an update.

[Shane]

Yeah, we should do this again.

[Amanda]

I think that we should do this again.

[Shane]

Yeah, we need to get Peter on.

[Amanda]

Well, don't spoil guys. Well, we definitely need to work that out.

[Shane]

Yeah. There's a bunch of people who submitted that that didn't.

[Amanda]

Weren't able to be here today. So it's gonna be around two.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Amanda]

Hell, yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Amanda]

Round two.

[Shane]

Yeah. All right. Well, thank you for watching. We hope maybe we solved your problems too, and we'll see you later.

[Amanda]

Solved our own problems. Bye, guys.

[Shane]

Goodbye.

[Amanda]

Smosh mouth. Smosh mosh mouth. Smash it.

[Shane]

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