Smosh Reads Reddit Stories – "Dating Is Cooked | Reading Reddit Stories"
Episode Date: May 2, 2026
Host: Shane Topp
Guests: Chance and Elle (Smosh cast)
Theme: Dating – the disasters, absurdities, and unexpected twists drawn from Reddit’s wildest personal stories
Episode Overview
In this episode, Shane, Chance, and Elle dig into some of Reddit's most bizarre and revealing dating-related confessions and conflicts. With their trademark witty banter and honest reactions, the Smosh crew analyzes relationship dilemmas ranging from secret kinks to cheese-fueled financial meltdowns. The tone throughout is irreverent, empathetic, and unfiltered—a true ride through the chaos modern dating has to offer.
Key Stories & Discussions
1. Crush Fetish or Just Bugging Out?
Segment Start: [02:20]
Reddit Post: “Am I Overreacting: He keeps hinting at an unusual kink.”
Summary:
A woman recounts how a new Tinder match repeatedly brings up his fascination with women crushing bugs—with their bare hands. Despite his insistence it's “not sexual,” the insistence and escalation make her deeply uncomfortable.
Key Discussion Points:
-
Red Flags Early On:
Shane and co. highlight how odd this persistent focus is, especially so early in “just the talking stage.”
“This is two weeks in. He’s dropping hits. That’s intense.” – Shane [06:00]
-
Kink Compatibility:
Debate on when something moves from a quirky topic to an unwanted sexual kink and the legitimacy of being unsettled by it.
“You're not kink shaming by being like, oh, not compatible for me.” – Shane [08:04]
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Online Commentary:
Hosts reference comments noting it’s a “crush fetish” linked to the giantess fetish: wanting to be bug-sized and squished.
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Resolution:
The woman blocks the guy after confronting him, validating her boundaries.
Notable Quotes:
“There is a kink for everything, isn’t there?” – Chance [05:16]
“If you’re just in the talking phase on Tinder... don’t bring up bugs at all.” – Shane [10:07]
2. Naming the Car: Endearing or Embarrassing?
Segment Start: [12:25]
Reddit Post: “Am I the asshole for telling my girlfriend the way she talks about her car is weird and embarrassing?”
Summary:
A man complains about his girlfriend referring to her car, Angie, as if it’s a beloved pet (“giving Angie a bath,” “getting Angie something to drink”). His frustrated outburst embarrasses her in front of friends, sparking silent treatment and a breakup.
Key Discussion Points:
-
The Whimsy Factor:
Elle passionately defends naming objects: “I think there’s power and magic in naming an object.” [14:48]
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Cultural Examples:
Swords, boats, Roombas—many things are named for attachment.
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Whose Boundaries Matter?:
The hosts stress that quirks like this are harmless and even sweet.
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Judgment:
Consensus is the guy was the jerk for shaming, especially while she was doing him a favor (DD for the friend group).
Notable Quotes:
“You called her weird and embarrassing as she did you and your stupid drunk friends a favor late into the night. You made her feel stupid because she now knows you’ve been embarrassed by her for months over a quirk. You’re the asshole.” [18:55, quoting Reddit comment]
“Giving anything a name... gives it some sort of weird power.” – Shane [15:29]
3. “Just Helping a Sick Friend”—Or Cheater in Disguise?
Segment Start: [20:02]
Reddit Post: “Am I overreacting for being mad my boyfriend stayed the night at another woman's apartment just because she has a cold or the flu?”
Summary:
A woman questions her boyfriend’s motives after he stays overnight caring for a female friend (Stacy) with a cold—despite her being healthy, and the narrator being out of state.
Key Discussion Points:
-
Unconvincing Explanations:
The crew is immediately suspicious. “No, not overreacting. What is that? What?” – Chance [21:55]
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Gaslighting Moves:
Shane highlights the boyfriend’s attempts to flip the situation, making the OP question herself.
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Alternative Actions:
Chance points out the obvious: “If they need a bedside assistant, you take them to the hospital.” [23:45]
-
Conclusion:
Everyone agrees the OP is justified in her suspicions; comments predict cheating or, at the very least, disrespect.
Notable Quotes:
“A head cold has never stopped me from having sex. I wouldn’t expect one to stop her.” – Reddit comment; group laughs [24:49]
4. Lesbian Panic: “Is My Neighbor Into Me?”
Segment Start: [25:14]
Reddit Post: “Is my neighbor into me or just being friendly? How do I know if she’s gay?”
Summary:
A woman questions whether her deepening friendship with her neighbor—daily runs, dinners, gifts—means romance, or if it’s unrequited. She’s newly out and nervous about making a move.
Key Discussion Points:
-
Queer Friendship vs. Romantic Signals:
Elle and Chance break down personal experiences, confirming it can be agonizing to parse friend-love from romantic attraction.
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Overanalyzing and Social Context:
Elle brings up confirmation bias and early-COVID social bubbles skewing perceptions.
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Advice:
Shane and Elle advise focusing less on “is she gay” and more on “are you into me?” to avoid unnecessary awkwardness.
Notable Quotes:
“It’s scary because you can have gay friends!” – Chance [37:20]
“If you just don’t assume everyone’s straight all the time, then you don’t even have to have a gay conversation.” – Elle [38:18]
Segment Highlight:
[46:29]:
“You know I like you, right?”
“And then she kissed me. Yes. We straight up just snogged in the kitchen and it was great.” – Shane reading OP's update.
5. The Vanilla Shampoo Fiasco
Segment Start: [48:21]
Reddit Post: “Am I the asshole for buying my girlfriend vanilla shampoo?”
Summary:
A boyfriend picks up his girlfriend’s favorite shampoo, admits he likes the way it makes her hair smell (like cookies). She’s weirded out he “sexualized” a mundane thing, leading to a larger discussion and eventual breakup.
Key Discussion Points:
-
Normalcy of Scent Attraction:
Hosts agree being attracted to a partner’s scent is normal; Elle says, “Smell can absolutely be sexy... it’s common.” [52:25]
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Underlying Issues:
They suspect the blowup isn’t about shampoo, but deeper resentments (over-sexualizing, apartment issues, etc.).
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Breakup & Aftermath:
The couple discusses boundaries, realize their incompatibility (she wants him to move out, etc.), and split amicably. OP’s update: girlfriend tries to reconcile, but he moves on, feeling validated by Reddit support.
Notable Quotes:
“You getting horned up in the spice aisle.” – Chance, mocking [50:14]
“If someone’s telling you to move, change your living situation, and diagnosing you with things—get out.” – Shane [58:23]
6. Financial Ruin by Cheese Wheel
Segment Start: [62:00]
Reddit Post: “Am I Overreacting: My girlfriend left me over a cheese wheel”
Summary:
A Canadian man, saving for a house with his unemployed girlfriend, spends almost their entire down payment ($18,500) on a 140lb wheel of rare cheddar, believing he can sell and profit. Girlfriend leaves him; further mishaps (math errors, storage equipment, landlord drama) ensue.
Key Discussion Points:
-
Delusional Investments:
Shane (and Reddit) break down how the OP wildly overestimates his potential profit and underestimates logistical nightmares.
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Impulsivity & Red Flags:
All agree this was reckless; the “it’s my money” defense doesn’t hold in shared savings.
-
Escalation:
After botching the cheese’s storage (melting the wax, landlord discovers, eviction notice ensues), the crew marvels at OP’s delusion.
Notable Quotes:
“You got the inside of a mozzarella stick all over the back of your truck.” – Chance [75:45]
“Whenever a guy comes at you with those words—asset, depreciating value, etc.—they don’t know what they’re talking about.” – Shane [76:06]
“I hope girlfriend got her $4,000 back. OP said: integrity is an asset that doesn’t depreciate. Unlike her savings, which will be eaten by inflation.” — Reddit quote read with total disbelief [80:20]
Memorable Moment:
[74:07] – The crew realizes the cheese wheel is suspiciously small for the price.
[78:18-79:17] – Shane: The OP’s pictures reveal duct tape and questionable tattoo choices as well as classic Reddit overcommitment to their bit.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
Elle, on friend zone ambiguity:
"There's something beautiful about it doesn't have to be a romantic type of love." [36:11]
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Chance, on dating dealbreakers:
“If you say the word bug two weeks in—blocked. Blocked forever.” [10:12]
-
Shane, on the cheese meltdown:
“He truly lost his girlfriend, all of his money, and his apartment over cheese. Absolutely destroyed his life for cheese.” [80:52]
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On interpersonal boundaries:
“He came to the conversation with boundaries and expectations... I’m in 100%.” – Elle [61:23]
Structural Reflection & Insights
- Group Dynamics:
The trio amplifies each story with their own takes, lived experiences, and lots of meta-humor—especially poking fun at self-deluding Redditors.
- Listener Engagement:
They frequently echo Reddit verdicts, read commenters’ best quips, and use hypothetical “what would you do?” scenarios, adding relatability.
- Meta-Commentary:
Elle is especially insightful about confirmation bias and perspective in relationship storytelling.
Timestamps for Core Segments
- [02:20] – Bug Kink Dating Debacle
- [12:25] – Girlfriend Names Her Car, Boyfriend Cringes
- [20:02] – “I’m just helping a sick female friend”
- [25:14] – Neighbor Love: How to Tell If She’s Into Me
- [48:21] – “Vanilla Shampoo” and Over-Sexualization
- [62:00] – Cheese Wheel Financial Fiasco
Conclusion
From bug squishing to dating via cheese wheel, the Smosh cast takes listeners on a wild romp through modern love’s strangest frontiers—with equal doses of empathy, mockery, and hard-earned wisdom. The ultimate verdict? Boundaries, honesty, and a sense of humor are a must—especially if you’re dating someone with an industrial dairy cooler in their living room.
For more stories and to catch them live, check out Smosh Reads Reddit Stories at Netflix's "Is a Joke" Festival, or wherever you get your podcasts!
