Didn't See THAT Coming | Reading Reddit Stories

Summary

Smosh Reads Reddit Stories

Episode: "Didn't See THAT Coming | Reading Reddit Stories"

Host: Shane Topp
Guests: Trevor, Angela
Original Air Date: April 4, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode revolves around the theme of Reddit stories with updates— specifically, new Reddit posts that unfold in real-time with twists, turns, and multiple follow-ups. Host Shane Topp and his guests, Trevor and Angela, humorously analyze each story, draw on their own experiences, and deliver a blend of empathy, skepticism, and comedians' banter. The show uses the stories as springboards for deeper discussions about boundaries, insecurity, relationships, and the more ridiculous corners of internet storytelling.

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Key Segments & Timestamps

• [00:41] – Introduction and studio updates
• [04:01] – Story 1: The Boyfriend's Inappropriate Shirt
• [25:26] – Story 2: Cousin Jealousy and Family Drama
• [50:01] – Story 3: The Camera Roll Dilemma
• [65:41] – Story 4: The Mystery Vibrating Sound
• [77:17] – Lightning round/Wrap-up

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Studio and Team Updates

[00:41–03:46]

• Shane introduces the podcast’s move to a new, in-progress studio closer to the beach, joking about elaborate pranks and nostalgia for their old location.
• Trev and Angela give lighthearted personal updates.
• All hosts riff on how moving might just be an elaborate sketch or pit video.

Notable Quote

“We’re moving, guys. It might be a prank.” – Shane [02:39]
"We can break laws now." – Shane [03:43]

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Story 1: "Am I the Asshole for Making My Daughter’s Boyfriend Buy a New T-Shirt?"

[04:01–25:20]

Story Summary

A dad recounts making his daughter's 19-year-old boyfriend buy a new shirt before family dinner when the boyfriend arrived wearing a T-shirt that read: "It's not gonna suck itself." The dad quietly gave the boyfriend $40 and sent him to Walmart to get a more respectful shirt. Later, the daughter finds out, feels her boyfriend was humiliated, and the boyfriend hints to her that it was embarrassing. Further updates reveal the boyfriend was dared to wear the shirt by his older brother, the family gets involved via Reddit, and the saga devolves into family-learned lessons and retribution for the older brother.

Key Discussion Points

• Shane, Trevor, and Angela all agree the dad handled the situation with rare, measured kindness and boundaries rather than anger.
• They riff on how much worse it could have gone ("He could have been thrown out!").
• Commentary on teenage reasoning and the outsized power of sibling dares.
• The dynamic of family embarrassment and learning moments is unpacked, both wisely and with plenty of jokes.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Shane:

  "He got lucky that he showed up and it was just the dad and the dad did that and didn’t kill him." [06:30]

• Trevor:

  "For him to be like, 'Here’s $40'... there are people that would have been like, 'Get out of my house. I never want to see you again.'" [07:49]

• Angela

  "It kind of shows his values. These are grown ass kids, man. This is a 19 and a 21-year-old!" [23:46]

Story Updates:

• [13:35] The daughter clarifies the “humiliation” to her dad; the boyfriend left out details.
• [15:31] The boyfriend admits he was dared by his older brother. The daughter demands accountability, including telling his own parents.
• [20:07] Boyfriend’s parents, Redditors themselves, discover the post, offer sincere apologies, and even punish the mischievous older brother by making him wear pink shirts.
• [25:10] The hosts marvel at social media’s real-life crossover, familial accountability, and the sheer sitcom energy of it all.

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Story 2: "Am I the Asshole for Not Hanging Out With My Cousin After Too Many Jokes About My Life Choices?"

[25:26–49:46]

Story Summary

The poster (a 22-year-old woman) is being endlessly needled by her cousin Mary (23) about her “corporate job,” choices, and financial stability. The sarcasm escalates into public digs and social discomfort. After the cousin is confronted, she gets defensive, family drama ensues, and, in the follow-up, Mary invents a fictional viral Reddit post to garner sympathy.

Key Discussion Points

• The hosts dissect how insecurity operates within friendships and family, especially during your early 20s.
• Personal stories are shared about feeling left behind or jealous, and how toxic it can be when someone wants you to be “smaller.”
• The group agrees: OP is NOT the asshole for pulling back after communicating boundaries.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Angela:

  "I think OP did what they were supposed to do... once you say how you feel and the other person won’t acknowledge or change, pulling back is the right move." [31:48]

• Shane:

  “The only way to release this is if her friend gets a job that she feels is equal to hers. And even then, is this the rest of our lives?” [39:18]

• Trevor:

  “You don’t want to feel guilty for succeeding or doing things you want to do.” [37:47]

• On Mary’s fake Reddit dramatics:

  "Honestly, I don't know if I even want to [talk to her] anymore. This reads like she found the post and then exaggerated the hell out of it." – Shane [44:05]

"The pain and insecurity gets so strong that you go to extents to get attention and love." – Angela [45:35]

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Story 3: "Am I the Asshole for Yelling at My Girlfriend Due to Her Camera Roll?"

[50:01–62:37]

Story Summary

A young man (23) gets angry at his girlfriend (21) for keeping her ex in group and friend photos on her camera roll, despite a non-romantic context. He demands she remove them entirely; she refuses to erase four-plus years of her life and leaves, calling out his emotional insecurity. The post is updated twice—first with his apology and her breakup, and finally, three years later, a twist: the entire saga was a fake, part of a journalist’s research project.

Key Discussion Points

• Shane and guests reflect on digital memory, modern relationships, and why this scenario—erasing digital “evidence” of the past—is both common and thorny.
• The group agrees that the boyfriend’s behavior is deeply insecure and controlling.
• The fake reveal prompts a meta discussion on internet stories, gullibility, and how hypotheticals are just as useful for self-examination, whether true or not.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Shane:

  "Buddy, I think you’ve already lost her." [52:32]

• Angela:

  "It's immature to get upset when anyone has exes at all; they existed." [55:59]

• Trevor:

  "You're asking them to delete so much more than just... this person in their life." [56:35]

• The fake-out reveal:

  "First of all, it was fake. Sorry. I know that sucks." [58:45]

• Angela:

  "I feel like I just did a cold plunge—an Internet cold plunge where you believed everything." [60:51]

• Shane:

  "Keep in mind, you might be getting marriage advice from a 12-year-old..." [63:19]

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Story 4: "Mysterious Vibrating in My Bedroom"

[65:41–76:59]

Story Summary

A Redditor describes a mysterious buzzing sound in their bedroom, which sporadically recurs and mimics the vibration of a cell phone. After extensive crowdsourcing and nearly two years, the culprit is finally revealed: the rhythmic breathing of their pet dog, whose inaudible exhales on quiet nights created the perplexing phenomenon.

Key Discussion Points

• Collective sympathy and sharing of similar experiences (phantom phone vibrations, unexplained household noises).
• The power of the brain to create or misinterpret patterns, especially with growing digital dependence.
• Comical “paranormal” speculation devolving into a commentary on modern anxiety and pet quirks.

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “This happened to me like two days ago.” – Trevor [73:10]
• “I'm decently confident that this is the same buzzing that I've been hearing for years...it was my stupid shepherd's exhales.” – Shane reading OP’s update [73:54]
• “It was the dog all along. This time you can blame it on the dog.” – Angela [77:13]

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Final Commentary & Wrap-Up

[77:17–77:53]

• Banter about wrapping up, sleeping at 11:30 in the morning, and tongue-in-cheek studio "updates."
• General affection and camaraderie closes out the show.

Notable Closing Quotes

“Thank you both for being here for all these updates." – Shane [77:17]

"Update: Another episode comes out. Love you." – Angela [77:49]

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Concluding Thoughts

Themes & Takeaways:

• Boundaries & Kindness: The first story’s dad illustrates non-explosive boundary-setting. The group exalts handling conflict without anger and offering a second chance.
• Insecurity & Jealousy: The cousin jealousy and camera roll sagas spark honest reflection on how insecurity breeds resentment, and the freedom that comes from letting it go.
• Critical Thinking on the Internet: The journalist story and the “fake” reveal serve as a reminder of internet gullibility— but also the surprising utility of using hypotheticals for self-examination.
• The Strange Comedy of Ordinary Life: From dogs emulating phone vibrations to the sitcom-like dramas in Reddit posts, the hosts underscore that sometimes the wildest mysteries have the dumbest answers.

Episode Vibe:
Witty, borderline irreverent banter intertwined with empathy and real talk—Smosh turns Reddit's tall tales into both comedy and modern life advice.

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Notable Quotes & Moments at a Glance

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|---------|-------| | 02:39 | Shane | “We’re moving, guys. It might be a prank.” | | 07:49 | Trevor | “There are people that would have been like, get out of my house. I never want to see you again.” | | 23:46 | Angela | “It kind of shows his values. These are grown ass kids, man. This is a 19 and a 21-year-old!” | | 39:18 | Shane | “The only way to release this is if her friend gets a job that she feels is equal to hers... is this the rest of our lives?” | | 52:32 | Shane | “Buddy, I think you’ve already lost her.” | | 60:51 | Angela | “I feel like I just did a cold plunge—an Internet cold plunge where you believed everything.” | | 73:13 | Trevor | “This happened to me two days ago!” | | 77:13 | Angela | “It was the dog all along. This time, you can blame it on the dog.” |

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Useful for Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In:

This episode is a perfect example of Smosh blending Reddit’s wild stories with genuine discussion—expect big laughs, candid confessions, surprising plot twists, and a recurring lesson about the perils of both literal and emotional clutter. Whether you’re seeking a laugh, some low-key therapy, or a little existential validation, Smosh Reads Reddit Stories delivers on all accounts in this week’s update-packed installment.

Transcript

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

Neighbor Gabo, then Doug. There's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual. Even if it means sitting front row at a comedy show.

Hey, everyone. Check out this guy and his bird. What is this, your first date?

[Shane]

Oh, no.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

We help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together. We're married. Me to a human, him to a bird.

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league anyways.

Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty.

[Shane]

Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. To realize the future America needs. We understand what's needed from us to face each threat head on. We've earned our place in the fight

[Trevor]

for our nation's future.

[Shane]

We are Marines. We were made for this. Hi, welcome to Smosh Reads Reddit Stories. I'm Shane and today is all about updates. Now, I know people have been asking for us to do updates on stories we've read in previous episodes of this show. That is not this episode. We found new stories that have a lot of updates, but we will be doing that at some point. We have a whole team compiling stories from the past and searching the Internet for their updates. By team, I mean Emily and Marcus hard at work. And Bailey as well. Sorry, Bailey is currently not here. This is through this episode. Today is actually being directed by Marcus Woo.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Very cool. So I'm gonna do this just like culinary crimes. Have you ever read a story that was so freaking Weir?

[Angela]

I think we're missing an asshole.

[Shane]

I am joined by two people who have updates for me, Trevor and Angela.

[Angela]

Update. We're moving.

[Shane]

Yes. Yeah, that is actually true.

[Trevor]

I've been having some hip pain.

[Shane]

Oh.

[Angela]

Oh, personal.

[Shane]

Well, that's an update.

[Trevor]

I don't know. I was literally trying to think of things.

[Shane]

No, no, no.

[Angela]

Let's get medical.

[Trevor]

I'm doing stretches.

[Shane]

That's good.

[Trevor]

I think it might be a basketball thing. I don't know.

[Shane]

Probably. Yeah. Do a lot of basketball.

[Trevor]

Getting old.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And you're tall. Yeah. Don't say you're getting old when you're like eight years younger. You're not allowed to do that.

[Angela]

Just like, don't really do that.

[Shane]

Why don't you settle down? You're just.

[Angela]

Don't do that.

[Shane]

Yes. So we are moving. As some of you watching this, and if you're listening, you're not seeing it. We are in a temporary studio right now. The Smosh Studios are moving to our brand new space.

[Trevor]

Moving. Oxnard.

[Shane]

Moving.

[Angela]

I'm like, let me. I think we're going to go Right back to the same building. And I think they're just like, we're

[Shane]

going to come back.

[Angela]

Moving front desk.

[Shane]

Just same person, but with a mustache.

[Angela]

Yeah. I think it's all an elaborate pit video.

[Shane]

We're moving, guys. It might be a prank.

[Trevor]

I just can't let go. Rancho Cucamonga like that.

[Shane]

I know.

[Trevor]

It treated us so well for so long.

[Shane]

I know. I'm gonna miss Rancho Cucamonga. You outgrow Rancho, but I hear Oxnard is gorgeous.

[Angela]

This is awesome. Okay, we're doing full Oxnard.

[Shane]

I, I'm committing to Oxnard.

[Angela]

Great. I, I, I wanted to try Ventura beach close. Yes. It's right, Right there. That's what I'm saying. It's perfect.

[Shane]

It's. Maybe we're in between Oxnard and Ventura.

[Trevor]

That's it.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah, we're right there. We just. We.

[Angela]

The beach, dude.

[Shane]

My.

[Trevor]

That's where my grandpa's carpet shop is, dude.

[Shane]

And we're. And we're right next door.

[Trevor]

We're in my grandpa. We're filming from my grandfather's carpet, dude.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah. And to be more specific, our studio is actually on the fifth story of a condo building, so we're actually in a residential building, but our studios are right there smack in the middle.

[Angela]

Yeah, it's a permit thing. We can do a lot more that

[Shane]

we're allowed to do whatever we want.

[Trevor]

We can get pretty crazy.

[Shane]

Yeah. This podcast really good. So we're allowed to do stuff now.

[Angela]

Really good podcast Doing good.

[Shane]

Podcast doing good. We can break laws now.

[Trevor]

That's how it works.

[Shane]

We can break zoning laws. All right, are we ready to hop into some stories?

[Angela]

I'm so stoked Every single one has an update.

[Trevor]

It'd be really funny if we did updates episode, and there were no updates. We get to the story, and Shane's like, next story.

[Shane]

Sorry we lied. Okay, let's begin. Our first story comes from. Am I the asshole? Posted in December of 2025. Am I the a hole for making my daughter's boyfriend buy a new T shirt? Okay. Can you please settle a mild dispute for my family on 23 December? My daughter, who's 19, her boyfriend, 19, came over for dinner. We had dinner then because he's going away with his family for Christmas. He arrived, rang the bell, and I answered the door. He came in, took off his jacket, and that's when I saw it. He was wearing a T shirt that said, it's not gonna suck at self. I took one look at that shirt and asked him if he had any money. He said no and asked why. I told him that the shirt showed a marked lack of respect for both my daughter and my wife. I pulled two twenties out of my wallet and quietly ushered him back out the door and towards the Walmart three miles away and told him to buy a more Respectful shirt with 40 bucks. 40 bucks to buy a more respectful shirt and come back with it on. Mind you, this whole exchange took place between him and I without an audience. He was gone for 15 minutes, came back with a nice polo shirt on. We had a nice dinner together and nothing was mentioned of the incident. The next day my daughter came to me and her mother and told us what I did. Humiliated him. They aren't in breakup territory or anything. And no yelling or anything of the sort went on. My wife did tell me I could have handled it differently. So Reddit, am I wrong for handling it this way? And if so, how could I have handled it? Edit, I'm 57 and a long haul truck driver, so I've had my share of bad moments. Most of us guys here can remember stupid things that we did as a teen, even into our 20s. The ones that stand out for me are the ones where someone didn't react with anger or malice. They were the ones where someone reacted with constructive kindness. One where a quiet redemption was offered, where a mirror was quietly held up to my behavior. Those are the ones I learned from and appreciated the most. Hopefully he comes out the other side with a new appreciation for kindness offered quietly and without fanfare. Just my thoughts. Okay, this feels pretty clear cut for me. I think he handled it very well. Right? The shirt. Hilarious. Bad though. Do not. I don't know what that guy was thinking showing up to dinner with his for his girlfriend and her parents wearing that. Bold choice. He got lucky that he showed up and it was just the dad and the dad did that and didn't kill him.

[Trevor]

Yeah,

[Shane]

you.

[Angela]

I think. Don't you? I think.

[Shane]

No.

[Angela]

Honestly, I would say if I wore

[Trevor]

the T shirt, I would think that

[Angela]

maybe that's like a funny shirt.

[Trevor]

Very generous for him to like. Sorry.

[Angela]

Do you want to go? Oh, no.

[Trevor]

You should.

[Angela]

Okay. I think. Okay. All right, Gotcha.

[Shane]

All right. Got you.

[Angela]

And you can do a seemingly quick

[Shane]

cut out of that.

[Angela]

I knew it.

[Shane]

This combo, it's only.

[Angela]

It's only. If we're waiting outside for too long.

[Shane]

Yeah, we get scheming.

[Angela]

Okay. Sorry. This shirt's hilarious.

[Trevor]

No, that is truly.

[Shane]

I mean, when I said. Okay, you guys kind of got me for a second. So when I said, that shirt hilarious, and you didn't respond. I was like, oh, no. Is it.

[Angela]

Like. It's actually not that funny.

[Shane]

Oh, okay.

[Trevor]

Yeah, actually, sorry.

[Shane]

No, I guess I need to rethink that.

[Angela]

Okay. I love that he, like, is already defending himself in the post.

[Shane]

This guy handled this very well.

[Angela]

And he's like, I think I did the best job at what I could.

[Shane]

I think I did a great job. Yeah.

[Trevor]

No, I mean, like, for him to be like, Here's $40. She like this. I feel like there. There are people out there that would have been like, get out of my house. I never want to see you again. Like, there are people that would flip out over that. The fact that he was like, hey, man, like, here's some money. Just please go get a new shirt.

[Angela]

This solution isn't kicking him out.

[Shane]

Like, he's still invited, still saying, come back.

[Angela]

So it is, like, kind of a respectful way at, like, laying down boundaries.

[Shane]

Yeah. And the boyfriend did go and get a nice polo shirt instead of going to Walmart, and he could have gotten another disrespectful shirt. He could have come back with the man, the legend.

[Angela]

If this was a Lonely island sketch, he'd come back and it was like, something worse.

[Shane]

Something worse.

[Angela]

Yeah, we'll suck that.

[Trevor]

It was like,

[Shane]

he comes back when he just put the shirt back, like, what?

[Angela]

And he's like, drinking a beer. It's like, thanks for the 40 bucks.

[Shane]

Also, reminder, the. The boyfriend and girlfriend have been dating for four months, so this is probably one of the first dinners he's having. That's what he wore, and he wore that shirt. And those shirts aren't like, come on, he's got to have other shirts. Yeah. Like, it's one thing to just not dress like, well, to see your girlfriend's parents. Like, you would want to kind of dress up a little bit, but to choose that shirt. This was the 23rd of December.

[Trevor]

Yes.

[Shane]

That's great as a Christmas.

[Trevor]

What I'm wondering is, like, I. The girlfriend obviously has to have a good sense of humor, but, like, I'm surprised for her to not be like, hey, I think that shirt's hilarious. Maybe we wear something different. But the fact that I know, like, I'm trying to figure out, like, if there's an acceptable age for this to be. Like, I let the kid wear the shirt, and I don't know that. Yeah, I don't think there is.

[Angela]

First time meeting the parents four months in this. It's like, it feels like it's on its way Be serious. But it's not just yet. It feels like it's an important meeting. Like I remember I was a little bossy with my first boyfriend when he met my parents. Cuz I was like, do you mind if we pull over and you like and we grab something for you to get my mom? Like I was a little. But I was nervous.

[Shane]

You want to make. You know, because if you make that bad first impression with the parents, it lingers. You're like, okay, I want everything to be cool. I want my parents to like you.

[Angela]

And I like how op the dad was like, I did this in a respectful way that was like showing what I needed changed. Yeah, he like he didn't. He wasn't just an to be an ass.

[Shane]

And he's a 57 year old long haul trucker. He's probably a bit of an intimidating figure. Yeah, right. Like I'm, I'm imagining a type of guy that's like you don't want to piss off.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

So to get that response it's like you better be lucky. You better be happy that that's what you got.

[Angela]

40 bucks.

[Trevor]

The woke thing to do would have been for the girlfriend to wear the shirt.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

And Doug, there's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual. Even if it means sitting front row at a comedy show.

Hey everyone. Check out this guy and his bird. What is this your first date?

[Shane]

Oh no.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

We help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together. We're married. Me to a human, him to a bird.

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league anyways.

Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty.

[Shane]

Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. That would have been pretty woke.

[Angela]

Yeah, it would have been woke because it's.

[Trevor]

I'm just saying.

[Shane]

What if they just switched shirts? What? Yeah.

[Angela]

What's another way he could have done this? Been like, please put on one of my shirts. Like, like what do you.

[Shane]

And so he comes back out with a shirt that says it's not gonna suck itself, it's just bigger. Just an XL of it. Verdict was not the asshole.

[Angela]

I agree.

[Shane]

Comments. You were very classy about it and even gave him the opportunity to get a new shirt instead of just going home and changing. Not the asshole. 14,000 up. Someone said not the asshole. I think you handled it well. He was an idiot to think that shirt would go over well with his girlfriend's family. And is lucky you didn't give him more grief for it. Someone responded to that Saying giving him money to get a new shirt and letting him come back shows you were willing to give him a second chance. Plus, it showed you have compassion by pointing out the issue, but also giving him help with a solution instead of leaving him on his own to figure it out. I'm curious what male role models he has, if any. Being a teenager, he probably doesn't realize the full implication of how disrespectful his shirt was. I think you handled it with excellence and grace.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Someone said, why on earth would your wife be against this? Opie said she just hated the idea of him being put on the spot. I did point out that I could have done it in front of everyone. Yeah, he could have. He put on the spot. He was not put on the spot.

[Angela]

He was. Yeah, he.

[Shane]

He saved him.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Shane]

I fear that from the spot.

[Trevor]

Couldn't have gone any better.

[Shane]

No. I don't know what other solution is better than that.

[Angela]

Yeah. I feel like the mom just didn't like the confrontation of it all, and she's blaming the dad because she knows him rather than blaming the person who wore the shirt.

[Shane]

Someone said, question, what else was on the shirt? Still in bad taste, but was there a graphic printed on it of, say, a lollipop or something like that? Opie said an arrow pointing down. No.

[Angela]

It's, like, really sweet that Reddit was like, let's think of all the options.

[Shane]

The arrow, it said, I mean, my penis, just so you know.

[Angela]

He said, dad and mom of my girlfriend. See here? Penis down here.

[Shane]

All of you suck this. Yeah. I think it's a huge red flag that the boyfriend wore that I kind of don't care what male role models he has. I'm like, he knew what he was doing. It feels so disrespectful. And even worse now is that after the dad did that, the boyfriend then made a big thing about it to the girlfriend and is making her feel bad about it and putting it on her.

[Angela]

That is honestly a bigger red flag than the shirt.

[Shane]

Exactly.

[Angela]

Being like, oh, something I did made you feel uncomfortable. I'm gonna be mad at you for feeling that way.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like this guy.

[Trevor]

No.

[Shane]

So we have an update. Okay, so where do we think? I don't know where this could possibly go. Is the boyfriend worse, or do we find out that how the dad handled it? Is he lying about how he handled it?

[Angela]

But I don't think I read it has burned you.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah, I don't think. I'm not buying unreliable narrator for this guy?

[Trevor]

No, I don't think so either.

[Angela]

I'm buying. There's smoke where there's fire. This guy isn't that great of a guy to his girlfriend. And they're going to break up.

[Shane]

Yeah. That shirt kind of shows his values. Here's.

[Trevor]

Here's what I'm thinking. And I know this is probably crazy, but I'm just gonna throw it out there. The boyfriend sneaks into the dad's closet and finds the same exact shirt and confronts him about being a hypocrite.

[Shane]

That would be the most epic version of this.

[Trevor]

That would be pretty incredible, I think. Maybe could even be a movie.

[Angela]

Yeah. Honestly, Kind of like a morality tale.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Trevor]

Thematic

[Shane]

update the next day. Oh, fun. After reading these comments and listening to everyone's point of view, I sat my daughter down this morning and asked what her boyfriend actually said to her. This changes my opinion of him. Apparently, he'd not told my daughter what the phrase was on the shirt, but did tell her, accurately, what I said to him and asked him to do. He didn't use the word humiliated. That was my daughter's interpretation. Her rush to defend him came from our examples. Apparently, she's taken note of the times I've defended my wife and vice versa. She also took note of our disagreements and private after the fact. She is going to talk to him when he gets back tomorrow to follow up on why he thought the shirt was appropriate for the family setting. I'll update again after the conversation. Okay. So he. He told his girlfriend, your dad made me change my shirt. It's like what was on the shirt was just a normal shirt or whatever. Like, he didn't tell her, Well, I was wearing the it's not going to suck itself shirt.

[Angela]

I was. I was wearing the shirt.

[Shane]

You hate the shirt. That demeans you.

[Angela]

Well, I was wearing the shirt you told me not to wear.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah. It's not a big deal. Okay.

[Angela]

Okay. I'm already like, okay. They're not really communicating.

[Shane]

All right, so the boyfriend sucks more.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Trevor]

Not looking good for him.

[Shane]

No. I think it's gonna get worse. Update number two comes hours later.

[Trevor]

Okay.

[Angela]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Trevor]

Great.

[Shane]

Update number two. My daughter called him about an hour ago. And this will be informative. She asked him why he'd not told her what the shirt said when he talked to her. His reply was telling because it was embarrassing. Then she went on to ask him why he wore it originally, and he admitted that the shirt had been a gift from his older brother, who's 21 and that the older brother had dared him to, called him chicken when he objected, etc. Dumb sibling crap. Apparently. She went on to tell him that none of what he'd done was cool and that she really liked him and that he'd always been kind to her. She said she wasn't breaking up with him, but that these steps needed to be done. First, he needed to explain to his parents the entire situation. Second, he needed to show up in person to our home and bring the money for the shirt and as she put it, put in a whole ass kissing session that included the explanation of the dare, etc. She said that if this was handled well, they could talk about moving forward and what that looked like. After the phone call, she talked to her mom and I and admitted that she forgot her worth. She said that as long as she'd been alive, I had never gone out of my way to embarrass her mom and that I'd always been respectful and not let anyone be disrespectful to her mom. Made me feel really good, so she wasn't going to settle for less. Good for her. I'll update after this visit later tomorrow afternoon. Okay, so the boyfriend's now saying, well, my older brother dared me. He called me chicken. And that's very powerful. That's.

[Angela]

At the end of the day, what can we say, huh?

[Shane]

That's basically a spell.

[Trevor]

Honestly though, like I truly, I was really, I've been this whole time, I'm like, what could compel a person, a 19 year old person, to wear this shirt? And that's just about the most believable thing.

[Angela]

Enter ugly older brother.

[Shane]

19.

[Angela]

You should wear it, dude. You should fudgeing.

[Shane]

What are you fucking chicken?

[Angela]

What?

[Shane]

Come on.

[Trevor]

You fudgeing pee? Yeah, I'm not going to.

[Shane]

We asked earlier, what male role models does he have? And we found out he has a brother who's two years older than him. And that's not good.

[Trevor]

And I think I can have my

[Shane]

brother two years older than you, rough

[Angela]

and being called a chicken.

[Shane]

Death. Yeah, yeah, death.

[Trevor]

I'd consider myself like, I think I was, you know, relatively like normal amount of dumb for a 19 year old. I just, I don't think anybody could ever, no matter what you said to me, convince me to do something. I'd be like, you're the dumbest person alive. I'm not gonna do that.

[Angela]

Maybe though, he was like really wanted his older brother's approval.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Angela]

And his older brother was like, it's chill dude, just wear it it's funny. And he like, why wouldn't he just

[Shane]

wear it and then go and change it on his way? Maybe he didn't have a bad choice.

[Angela]

He would be a chicken.

[Trevor]

Because he'd be a chicken, bro.

[Angela]

Cause ultimately that would make him a bigger chicken.

[Shane]

Not understand. He would be a chicken.

[Angela]

He would like literally become a chicken.

[Shane]

His brother will know.

[Trevor]

His brother's just in the bushes watching him walk up to the house.

[Angela]

Just like you call.

[Shane]

He like, he like secretly changes the shirt for the dinner and comes back home, but he puts on the, the, the, the it's not going to suck itself shirt. And he comes back in his brother's like, where are you going? Smells like chicken.

[Angela]

Or he wakes up the next morning,

[Shane]

you change that shirt, didn't you?

[Angela]

He wakes up the next morning, we find out his brother is like a witch. And then he wakes up and he like feels feathers on him. He's like, oh, my God.

[Shane]

Oh no, I'm a chicken. Oh my God.

[Angela]

But honestly, in all sincerity, your siblings opinion of you and your siblings calling you not cool when you're young is like really sad. It's death and you will do anything and that. And I feel bad for him because that sucks. That was bad advice.

[Shane]

My brothers were luckily so much older than me that they didn't do anything of that yeah. Level. But they did have that power over me when I was a little kid. I would have done anything. Yeah, right. But you have a sibling who's about that age difference, right?

[Angela]

Yeah, he's 2 and 3. Three years younger than me.

[Shane]

That's. Yeah, it's powerful. It's a powerful, like, yeah. I mean, he siblings that close in age. But you were older than him.

[Angela]

Yeah. And he's still, if he says anything I do is not cool.

[Shane]

I'm like, it's rough.

[Angela]

I kept saying tats instead of tattoo. When we were both getting tattoos and he texted me with the artist, I'm getting tattooed. We're both getting sibling tattoos. And I kept going, so what's like the longest tat you've ever given or what's, what's. And I kept saying tat. And I was like, that's a cool tat. And my brother texted me in all caps, please stop saying tat. It's really uncool. And he was right next to me in the article.

[Trevor]

Oh, oh, that'd be devastating.

[Angela]

But it is like really uncool to say tat is what I learned.

[Shane]

I don't think it's that bad.

[Angela]

Like, that's A nice tat.

[Shane]

Yeah, you're fine.

[Angela]

But, you know, siblings, it just cuts. It cuts deep.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah, because it just.

[Angela]

Right. Goes back to when you were like, a kid and you had no freaking,

[Trevor]

like, I don't know, Beast like me doesn't really care. Yeah, I've talked about my brother, though. Beast like me doesn't get like me.

[Shane]

All right, update number three. Well, the next day, it's December 28, 2025. This will make those of you following this saga laugh. I received a call this evening from Mr. Boyfriend's parents. Firstly, they are mortified and extremely apologetic. Secondly, and the best part of this update, I have their permission to squeal, is that his parents are on Reddit and commented on my post in support of the way I handled the situation. They told me that they love my daughter and that we'd raised her right and had not raised their sons to show this level of disrespect for anyone, let alone his girlfriend. Apparently, Boyfriend was following up on one of my daughter's conditions and went to talk to his parents. As the story unfolded, his mom reached for her phone, opened Reddit, and yelled, is this about you? To quote his dad as the son read the first half paragraph, he died a little inside. So anyways, they are going to come to dinner tomorrow evening with boyfriend. More updates tomorrow night. Oh, dude, your boy, your dad, your parents are Redditors, dude, this is crazy.

[Angela]

But also, they're going to dinner. They can do something really funny. They could be extremely funny. Is this play about us? That's what that is, dude.

[Trevor]

You know, honestly, that's something that I never considered before, is the people inside of the Reddit story not being aware that they're in a Reddit story. Like, the fact of him seeing, like, oh my God, there's this Reddit thread about me in real time. That's crazy.

[Angela]

If I'm that mother, I'm losing it. I'm going, this is. Where's the shirt? Oh, my God.

[Shane]

What if he showed up to the dinner wearing a shirt that says it sucks itself? This situation.

[Angela]

Fine, I'll suck it myself.

[Shane]

Suck it myself. A shirt that says, this is such a Reddit story.

[Angela]

Merge.

[Trevor]

My life is a Reddit story, bro.

[Shane]

Suck it. Update number four. Dinner was very pleasant. Let me say that his parents are great. Boyfriend showed up with red roses for my daughter and yellow roses for for my wife. He offered what I thought was a very sincere apology and a card with the entire $40 in it, even though he'd given me the change and receipt. On the original night I cooked tonight to give my wife a break, I made an Indian dish called butter chicken with basmati rice. Neither had eaten curry before, but loved it. Woohoo. What am I reading? I made an Indian dish.

[Angela]

What am I reading?

[Shane]

This just turns into David Copperfield.

[Angela]

What am I reading? I.

[Shane]

After that, we traveled out into the countryside. Years later, my daughter graduated. As it turns out, his older brother is the family athlete. JV soccer, varsity soccer and a sports scholarship for soccer. The quintessential jock little brother is the exact opposite. Artistic, he's got real talent. Sensitive, quiet. Felt like he never measured up to his big brother and works to gain his big brother's respect. Brother takes full example of this and exploits his little brother for shits and giggles. Near the end of dinner, my daughter says, I think I'll keep him around for a little longer. You guys okay with that? We are good with that for now. His mom is the boss though, for thinking outside the box. As punishment to the older brother, mom went into his clothing drawers and closet, took every shirt off of him and bought him eight very bright pink T shirts that he'll wear until he realizes just how damaging exploiting someone, anyone, is. His access to cash is also cut off until said lesson is learned. Anyway, a successful night with new friends was enjoyed. Hope this was the update you hoped for.

[Trevor]

These are.

[Angela]

It came with butter chicken and all that fun stuff.

[Shane]

They disowned their other son.

[Trevor]

These are.

[Angela]

And he's got to wear pink.

[Trevor]

These are grown ass kids, man. This is a 19 and a 21 year old.

[Shane]

Like come on. I guess, I don't know like what high schoolers go through now. I feel like wearing a pink T shirt does not hit like it did back in like 2000.

[Angela]

Yeah, it feels very.

[Shane]

I don't think, I think wearing pink, wearing a pink shirt I don't think is a problem for any high school kid.

[Trevor]

Yeah, also is 20. Is 21. No.

[Shane]

Oh, he's 21.

[Trevor]

He's.

[Shane]

Yeah. Wait, sorry. That's right, I forgot.

[Angela]

And his cash flow is cut off.

[Trevor]

Like who is.

[Shane]

He's an adult who can do what he wants.

[Trevor]

He's an adult whose mom is taking him shirts and not giving him money.

[Angela]

Maybe that's her like G rated way of giving him the like the revenge back. Because she like didn't want to give him a disgusting shirt. But she was like, I'll make you feel girly. Like I don't think it's.

[Shane]

So you're a girl now.

[Trevor]

This is so good.

[Shane]

He is 21. I forgot. I don't know why I. The way they were talking, it was like, oh, yeah, I guess, sure. But no. What?

[Angela]

I love that they listen.

[Trevor]

The way they're talking, like, JV soccer, varsity. Like, it sounds like they're in high school.

[Angela]

I know. They're listing all of it. JV this, varsity, this.

[Shane]

Yeah. Okay, wait.

[Angela]

I love this family. I want to hang out.

[Shane]

Oh, okay. I was confused. In high school, he was doing all that soccer stuff, and now he has a soccer scholarship to a college. I just like that. It's like we took all your clothes away and cut off your cash flow. He's like, all right, I'm gonna go to the bar. All right, you guys are weird.

[Angela]

All right. I'm gonna take my credit card and

[Shane]

go get a shot of whiskey at the bar anyways. Okay, moving on. That was a very fun first one. That's just. Yeah, classic death.

[Angela]

We kind of got, like, three movies out of it.

[Shane]

That was an episode of Modern Family.

[Trevor]

Some good, clean family fun episode of

[Angela]

King of Queens or something. Yeah.

[Shane]

This episode of Red Stories is sponsored by Rocket Money. Rocket Money has helped me consolidate all my checkings and savings into one big financial mural that I can stare at all day, every day. Like, right now, you may think I'm holding this iPad and reading Reddit stories, but I'm actually looking at all my bills piling up and seeing what I can kick out of my life. That's efficiency. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. I'm constantly losing track of all my subscriptions, and when I can or can't cancel them. Also, I can set budgets and goals for myself using the app, and I can check on current transactions and refunds all in one place. For the longest time, I had subscriptions I'd completely forgotten about. And with Rocket Money, I was able to cancel them with just a few taps. And over the years, I've saved a lot of money off of not having any subscriptions I've forgotten about. It's been great. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join@rocket money.com pit Reddit. That's rocket money.com pit Reddit. Rocket money.com pit Reddit. And now back to the show. Oh, bills. Our next story comes from. Am I the asshole? This was posted in February of this year. Am I the asshole for not inviting my cousin to hang out anymore after she kept making Jokes about my life choices. Okay, this could go a lot of places. So I, a 22 year old woman, have a cousin, I'll call her Mary, 23 year old woman. And we used to be genuinely really close growing up. Like our families see each other almost every weekend. We went to the same school for a while and there was a point where she was honestly my closest friend out of everyone I knew. We told each other everything. But over the past year or so things just started feeling different. Hard to explain at first, like nothing I could really put my finger on, just a vibe I was getting. So a bit of background. I finished college earlier this year and started working a full time job. Nothing crazy, just a normal office job. But it was a big deal for me personally because I worked really hard to get there. Mary on the other hand, is still figuring out what she wants to do. And like I genuinely mean it when I say I have zero judgment about that. Life isn't a race and everyone figures things out at their own pace. I never once made her feel bad about it, or at least I really tried not to. But somewhere along the way she started making these comments. Little things at first that I brushed off as just her sense of humor because she has always been kind of a sarcastic person and I used to find it funny stuff like must be nice to already have your life together. Whenever I mentioned anything work related or some of us don't have it easy like you. If I talked about weekend plans, she started calling me Corporate Girl as like a nickname, which sounds harmless, but the way she said it was always a little sharp, like there was always just a tiny edge underneath it that I couldn't quite explain to anyone without sounding oversensitive. And it wasn't just once in a while. It became kind of a pattern. If I mentioned being exhausted after a long week week, she'd say something like try being unemployed and stressed. Must be rough having a paycheck though. If I talked about saving up for a trip or something I wanted to buy, she'd go, of course you can afford it with this little laugh. If I brought up anything about work at all, even just casually in conversation, there was almost always a comment waiting on the other side of it. At first I genuinely just laughed it off every single time because I did not want to be the person who can't take a joke. I kept telling myself she didn't mean anything by it and I was probably just reading into things. But then it started happening in front of other people. Family dinners, group hangouts. Even once in front of some people. We had just met that night and something about having it happen in front of others made it feel worse somehow. Like I could feel myself getting quieter every time we were in a group together because I never knew when the next comment was coming and I didn't want to have to laugh it off again in front of everyone. I started kind of dreading hanging out with her, which made me sad because this is someone I genuinely love and used to look forward to seeing. Then a few weeks ago, we made plans to grab coffee, just the two of us. And within like the first 20 minutes, she made a comment about how I've changed since I started working and that I'm too busy for real people now. And I don't know if it was just because I was already tired or because it had been building for so long, but something about that one just hit different. So I said something. I kept my voice calm. I wasn't trying to start a fight or make it dramatic. I just told her honestly that the jokes had been piling up and they were starting to feel genuinely hurtful and I'd really appreciate it if she could ease up on this them. She did not take it well. She got defensive almost immediately and told me I was being way too sensitive and acting like I was better than her. She said she was just teasing and that I was making a big deal out of nothing. The conversation got a little awkward after that and we kind of just moved on, but it felt unresolved after that. I just stopped reaching out to make plans. I still reply to her texts when she messages me. I don't ignore her or anything, but I haven't been the one to suggest getting together or initiate anything like I used to. Well, apparently that did not go unnoticed. My aunt called my mom recently and said Mary is upset that she feels like I've suddenly gone cold on her and she doesn't understand why I'm being distant. Which, like, I get that it probably does feel that way from her side. But also, she kind of never acknowledged what I said at the coffee thing. Now there's a bit of a divide in the family. Some people think I should just brush it off, keep the peace. She was just joking around. Others actually understand where I'm coming from and think I had every right to say something and pull back a little. And I really don't want this to turn into some massive family drama because I do care marry and I miss the friendship we used to have. But I also don't want to go back to Feeling uncomfortable every single time we hang out and biting my tongue every time she makes a dig. So am I the asshole for slowly pulling back after she kept making these comments even after I told her how I felt

[Angela]

then.

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[Shane]

Oh, no.

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[Shane]

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[Trevor]

Ooh, that is so heartbreaking.

[Shane]

What a tough place to be.

[Trevor]

It's so hard to, like, yeah, just, like, obviously, like, hear the progression of, like, the first couple times of being like, ah. And then it just getting worse and worse, not knowing what to do. And then when you finally say something about it, to be just told that you're, like, overreacting or, like, not so exhausting.

[Angela]

To answer OP's question at the end. I don't think you're an asshole for pulling back after you've communicated your boundaries. I think it gets into scary. It gets into, like, debatable territory when you pull back without communication. But I think you did. OP did what they were supposed to do in that, like, they said what they needed, they gave that person a chance, and then that person kept crossing those boundaries.

[Shane]

Yeah, I think she's handled. I don't know how I would really handle it differently. It's. It's really sad to, like, look at this, especially now being in my 30s, where you look at, like, you're 22 and 23. Right. And what's tough about your 20s is, like, yeah, you're all trying to figure your life out and the paces at the time when you're 22 and 23, it feels astronomical. It's like, you're successful. I'm not. And it's like, you're both going to be 31 day, and it's. You're going to be like, wow, I can't believe my 20s. I didn't find a job until I was 25, 26, and you found a job at 23, and now it doesn't matter. Or like, I found a job and I got fired and my late 20s were crazy. And then at the end, I found something. Your 20s are all over the place, and your 30s are all over the place, like, as an actor I think I can really relate to this because like I remember being a teenager, early 20s, where someone would like book a movie.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And I'm like, and I haven't booked anything in three years. And I, I fucking suck. And I. You can't help but feel resentful. But then a few years pass and then that person who booked a movie hasn't worked in a couple of years and you're working.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And you start to realize like, oh, there's no such such thing as like I'm better than you, you're better than me. It's like we're all on this roller coaster.

[Angela]

Well said. I really relate to this in like, in ways that like my 20s was that it was like very hard. I had a lot of really good friends and like my roommates, we like all were just so close and supported each other so much. But I think sometimes you can like, you can feel so insecure about how you're doing in your day to day that then it somehow starts attacking you from the inside. And then you get mad at people for having things that you want and that. And you did nothing to get that. You know what I mean? That makes me mad. It just makes me mad that life hasn't given that to me yet. So I'm. And then I think sometimes you're in such denial about it because you love your friends that then you just start like attacking them in little ways just because like, honestly I would, I would always think about how like I'm a, I'm a Double Libra. And like my want for fairness sometimes strangles me because I'm like, it's just, it's just not fair because you have that money because you grew up with that money. And I'm working I. And like just trying to be like, well, it's different for some people. And like I would like say stuff I remember. And then I had a friend that did this to me a lot. Every time I came home and I would like buy new clothes, she'd always like, oh, bought some stuff. You bought clothes. Like, she would always make me feel weird for spending money. And I didn't even have like money to spend, but it was just like it was a bad habit. And she would call it out and she would kind of be like, oh, I'm work. She had like more jobs than I did did. And I, I just remember it was always like a really small comparison game and like a fairness thing.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Angela]

Being like, well, you have extra time because you have this or whatever. And, like, just saying that out loud, not to bring someone down, but to make you feel better. And in the end, it never makes you feel better.

[Shane]

Makes you feel worse. It.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

I can relate in feeling the resentment and the, like, obsessing over, like, wow, that person's life is. They have everything I want.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Like, at least, like, oh, they're working a job.

[Angela]

That's human.

[Shane]

Or, like, yeah, truly. Like, in my early 20s, like, I. I was, like, I had been single up until I was, like, in my early 20s, almost mid-20s, and, like, I was very jealous of people for relationships and stuff, and I was just like. Like, it's not me. But there's nothing more freeing than letting, like, recognizing that resentment and, like, letting

[Angela]

it go or seeing that that resentment is getting in between you and your friend.

[Shane]

Yeah. And also probably getting in between you and your actual goals and find happiness in life.

[Trevor]

And it's tough because there is so much, like, societal expectation of, like, oh, you're. You finish high school, you got to go to college. You finish college, you got to get a job. And. And it's, like, so hard. Especially, like, your early 20s. There's so much going on upstairs, especially nowadays. Like, it's, like, hard. Your brain is developing, and. And it is hard, and it's stressful. And so, like, I. I totally can, like, empathize with, like, seeing someone who. In your mind, you're like, they have it all together. But then. Yeah. Taking that out in a way, like. Like, in a negative way on your friend or something, and then not being able to, like, reconcile and be like, I. I'm sorry. Realize that.

[Angela]

And when you're hard, when you're feeling less than somebody else, it, for some reason always feels like, because your pain hurts sometimes. Like, I'm trying to go back to when I would feel this way and I would make little digs, and it was because I was hurting.

[Shane]

Yeah, totally.

[Angela]

And it was because I didn't want to hurt alone. And I wanted someone to, like, understand how I felt. And it's not that I never think I genuinely wanted to hurt somebody else. I just wanted to go like, well, I'm hurting, so. And I.

[Shane]

And you don't be left behind.

[Angela]

Exactly. And, like, instead of just saying, like, who. I actually feel a little insecure and, like, actually opening up, then getting, like.

[Shane]

Because that feels like that your head says that's defeat.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Like, it's like, oh, if I admit it, then I'm. Then I am a loser. But it's actually no it's actually. It kind of acknowledges, like, no, you're not. Like, you're just feeling this way.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

The reality of the situation is very different.

[Trevor]

And it's like every. I feel like every person that is, you know, over the age of 30 or everyone is like, yeah, I. I found this thing, you know, my passion in life when I was 45. I found, like, my career when I was, you know, in my late 30s. Like, there is no. Everybody's timeline is different, but it's. It's really hard to see that when you're, you know, young, the same age as someone who you really care about and. And probably, like, look up to, in a way, seeing them, like, you know, succeed or do something that you want to do.

[Angela]

Were they the same age or was.

[Shane]

They're pretty much the same age. I think they're 22 and 23.

[Angela]

So, yeah, that's. That's also. It's hard when you're, like, doing it together.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah. And you're like, oh, and now I'm alone. Don't leave me here. But I also feel for OP What a tough place to be in where it's like, oh, this person that I love resents me for something I have no control over.

[Trevor]

Like, you don't want to feel guilty for succeeding or doing the things that you want to do, like making, you know, strides in your life.

[Shane]

Like, they.

[Trevor]

They're on a different timeline, they're on a different path, and you. It's really unfair to be made to feel guilty for that.

[Shane]

Yeah. And like, I'm not.

[Angela]

Not.

[Shane]

I'm not one to usually gun for, like, oh, cut someone out or move. Get, like, move out of someone's life. But you. You don't have much choice when it's like, oh, this person wants me to be less.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

That is. Their whole desire is for me to make myself smaller. What option do you have?

[Angela]

I mean, I. A lot. I think almost all of my female friendships are. Or a lot of my female friendships are people who are struggling because they thought safety is making themselves smaller in environments like. And. And that is. It's. It's unfortunate because I do think OP should distance themselves, and I don't know if I would have had that ability to know that or say that, like, five years ago.

[Trevor]

And, I mean, once you have the conversation and try and bring it up and they're still not willing to, like, acknowledge that or accept it, then at that point, it's like, you've done all you can do to, like, try and help them Understand? And it's. It's up to them at that point to figure out whatever's going on inside themselves and release that insecurity or jealousy or whatever it is and move on. Yeah. I mean, I'm also not, like, generally speaking, not someone who's very quick to like, oh, you got to cut them off. But I think some distance away from someone like that in that situation is necessary.

[Shane]

I don't think this is going to get better. If she tried to talk to her and it was met with that, I'm like, this resentment's only going to build. Her resentment is based on her own success. Right. It's like the only way this has a release is if her friend gets a job. Job that she feels is equal to hers. It's like, all right, like, hope that happens. But even then, it's like, is this the rest of our lives?

[Angela]

And you don't realize it at the time, but that could fundamentally, like, really affect the way you walk into rooms. Yeah. When you are worried about other people.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Angela]

And that is coming from personal experience. It's just hard. It's hard.

[Shane]

And I. I'm not surprised that so many people in her family are saying, like, oh, just brush it off. Just deal with it. Make yourself small.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Verdict was not the asshole comments, not the she wasn't joking. She was taking little digs at you out of insecurity and then calling you sensitive. When you finally said something, you didn't even blow up. You just pulled back to protect your peace. If she actually cared about the friendship, she would have apologized and adjusted instead of running to the family like you wronged her. She did go and tell the whole family afterwards, which is a betrayal, I think OP said. The point is she never apologizes. She feels that's the best part about her, that she never backs down. Someone said, not the those were not harmless jokes. They were repeated digs rooted in insecurity, security. The pattern, the timing, and especially doing it in front of other people shows it wasn't just teasing, it was undermining you. You did the right thing by addressing it calmly and giving her a chance to correct it. Her response wasn't to reflect or apologize, but to dismiss your feelings and call you sensitive. That's the real issue. Pulling back is not punishment. It is protecting your piece. This is a natural consequence of their behavior. You're still replying and being civil. You're just no longer investing in a dynamic that makes you feel small. If she wants the closeness back, she needs to acknowledge how her Behavior affected you. Opie said, I am not sure that things will be the same even after apologizing now. Wow. Lastly, someone said, yes, she sounds jealous. I hope she comes to her senses soon, takes what you said to heart and changes how she acts with you. Not the asshole. If asked again, tell your aunt to ask her daughter. You told her why? At coffee, Opie said, my mom told her that, but my aunt is defending her daughter, that she was just joking. Yeah, I. We have an update.

[Angela]

Okay.

[Shane]

And I don't have much faith in it. I think this is going to get worse. Yeah, I think all the signs are there that it's going to get worse. Okay. The next day. So this took a turn I absolutely did not see coming. Oh. So yesterday, a few hours after my original post, I got a call from Mary and she was furious, like immediately yelling. The second I picked up, she went off about how I portrayed her wrong on Reddit and how everyone is blaming her and that so many people have read it and now she looks terrible. I was honestly just sitting there confused because, like, my post got some comments, but it wasn't exactly what she was saying. The comments were pretty measured. Some people agreed with me. Some said to talk it out, nothing crazy. But she kept going. She started listing off all these specific things I apparently said in the post. Except here's the thing. I didn't say half of what she was claiming. She was talking about details that straight up weren't in my post at all. Different scenarios, things I never mentioned, stuff that didn't even happen. That's when it clicked. She wasn't talking about my post. She was either talking about a completely different post she found or. Or I don't even know. I tried to tell her that, but she wasn't hearing it. She hung up on me. Then apparently she went crying to her mom, my aunt, about how I publicly humiliated her on the Internet. My aunt called my mom. My mom was confused because she'd actually read my post. I shared it to her after I got one such comment, which I. Which felt funny and it was pretty tame. Then another cousin got involved, trying to mediate, and actually went looking for the post Mary was describing. He couldn't find anything matching what she claimed. So then there was this whole family group chat thing happening that I wasn't even in, but heard about later where people were trying to figure out what was going on. And then, and this is the part that honestly made me laugh, Mary apparently let it slip in front of our other aunt that she just did it to Get a reaction out of me. The whole viral Reddit post thing. Either she made it up entirely or found some random post that vaguely sounded similar and decided to pretend it was about her. To what? Make me feel guilty? Start drama? Get attention? I genuinely have no idea. Idea. The family group chat apparently went silent after that. Or maybe she found my original post and just started exaggerating things. My mom texted me later, like, so your cousin is something else. And I just had to laugh because what else can you even do at that point? The funniest part. My actual post is fine. Barely got any traction, just sitting there minding its business, while Mary created an entire fictional drama around it. I don't even know what to do with this information. Part of me feels vindicated because this is exactly the kind of behavior I was talking about in my original post. But another part of me just feels sad because this is so much more unhinged than I expected. Connected. I haven't talked to her since. Honestly, I don't know if I even want to anymore. This reads like the she found the post and then exaggerated the hell out of it.

[Angela]

We gotta make sure Mary doesn't listen to Smosh reads Reddit stories.

[Shane]

Yeah,

[Trevor]

I can't go on Reddit, man. If I went on Reddit and saw, like, you know, found like, a post, like, one of my friends being like, my. I have a friend who, like, works on a very popular YouTube channel, and I was like. Like, that would be. That would be crazy, actually. That would be really funny. Maybe I should start.

[Shane]

I mean, I was gonna say, like, because, you know, being doing this for 10 years, there's plenty of times where I've gone on and read just conversations of people, like, talking about me.

[Trevor]

No way. In.

[Shane]

In, like. Oh, yeah. I mean, all the time, right?

[Angela]

Actually, you know, you're so right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Shane]

So, like, like, not horribly negatively, but just, like, in ways where I'm like, oh, I. I almost feel like I'm listening in on a conversation I shouldn't be hearing. It's kind of weird.

[Angela]

Always in the back of my head, wanted to write a Reddit story. So bizarre. And see if somehow it gets on the show.

[Shane]

We'd probably clock it.

[Angela]

Probably too many spelling errors.

[Shane]

I also think the way that the cousin exaggerated the story is how she's exaggerating her entire dynamic with OP in her head all the time. Yeah, I think that's like, kind of how resentment works. Is it, like, builds up to a fictional place inside your own head?

[Angela]

God, it sucks so bad.

[Shane]

It really does suck.

[Trevor]

It's heartbreaking to like have someone that you're that close to. It sounds like. And are just like best friends with and then truly not be able to do anything. And also you just have to let them figure their stuff out.

[Angela]

I'm not like standing up for Mary, but I will say sometimes the pain and like insecurity gets so strong that you go to extents to get attention and love. She's trying to get OP to say sorry in such a dramatic way because she wants love and attention in such a dark place that she's in.

[Shane]

Right.

[Angela]

That now she's lying and she's like making shit up that.

[Shane]

Yeah. And, and here's the situation. I mean, look, if Mary happens to watch this, I would, I would say to her, I'd be like, you, you're going to be so much happier. Like you yourself will be happier if you let this resentment go and, and find like apologize and, and yeah. Want the best for the people that you love in your life. And I think, I believe that can really happen in. She's young. I think people do go through these phases in life sometimes and I think it's possible to learn these lessons.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

But if she doesn't, she's. She's gonna blink and she's gonna be 40 and. And miserable.

[Angela]

I was just gonna say, like, life right now, especially in the world we're living in, is too hard and too short to make anybody around you, especially the people you love, make any of their good witness a threat to you. It, it's just, it's just too dark. Like you're gonna blink and life is gonna be done.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Angela]

And it's just like, what? When a good thing happens to you, it happened to all of us. Because life's hard and we should just enjoy it. You know what I mean? Yeah.

[Shane]

And I would certainly say too, to a unemployed 22 year old, like, sorry that you ended up in like one of the worst times to try to get a job.

[Angela]

It's like, I can't imagine you got

[Shane]

over by like a million other people than your cousin. Yeah. Be mad at them. Be mad at the system. Like you. It is not your fault that you're in the place you're in. Do not take it out on the people who are there for you. You're going to yourself over even more.

[Angela]

It feels like OP did try to get Mary to like let down those boundary. Let down that. That animosity.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Angela]

It feels like it just didn't work.

[Trevor]

There are a lot of People that would have just been like, you know, had that kind of pattern of behavior and seen it and just not said anything and been like. And just slowly dissed and not explained it. And I think that, you know, for her to be like, yeah, this is what's going on. This is, like, how I've been feeling. And I really respect that, you know?

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Trevor]

Do that.

[Shane]

And I just. It's just like, it sucks. Cause it's like, there is nothing better than truly, genuinely wanting the best for the people around you. Right. Like, and really wanting that. And it's hard when you're in a down place. Place. But I would also say to Mary is like, there will come a time, I would bet money on it, where OP is in a worse spot than her for whatever way, whatever it is.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And in those times, you're like, I believe OP would still want the best for Mary. And you're like, it's. The dynamic is going to change over time. But it's great that when you have people that in your life that you know that no matter the circumstances, you want the best for each other and you're there for each other.

[Angela]

And even if you get. If you feel weird, I think just acknowledging it and going, hey, it's been a dark month for me. I wish I could, like, but I, I. I still want to support you. You know what I mean? Like, and just saying it out loud and being like, I don't. Instead of just digs.

[Shane]

I think that's something. I think us here at Smosh are very good about that. About it being like, hey, I'm. I'm feeling this feeling.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And acknowledging, like, hey, this is an irrational feeling that I'm feeling. I'm letting you know I'm feeling this. I'm saying that I'm not acting on it. I. I'm recognizing it, but I. Communicating, I'm feeling.

[Angela]

Because once you acknowledge it, then it's like, whoa, I got it out.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Angela]

But if you hide it, then you're like, that's cool. You went shopping today. I wish I could.

[Trevor]

And it's completely normal feelings. Like, I literally, in the last month, have seen things have been like, damn, like, I wish I was doing something like that. And it's like. And it's normal. But then also it's. You feel so much better when you see someone doing something. You're like, dude, that's so awesome for them. Like, I feel so much more enriched when I'm just happy for people. But it's a very human thing. Like, Everyone goes through it and it's just finding out like, you know, figuring out the way to deal with it that isn't bringing someone down.

[Angela]

Should we kiss?

[Shane]

All right, our next story comes from Am I the asshole? This is posted in February of 2023. Whoa. Am I the asshole for yelling at my girlfriend due to her camera roll?

[Trevor]

I know that there's every situation is different, but I feel like any, any story that starts off am I the asshole for yelling at my girlfriend? Like, yeah, I just like, I don't think there's ever been a situation where I'm like, yeah, that was, it was justified to just yell at your partner.

[Shane]

Yeah, but let's hear him out.

[Trevor]

Hear him out.

[Shane]

Let's hear him out.

[Angela]

Hear him out.

[Shane]

Hold on, I'll hear him out. There's got to be some atrocious shit in those camera rolls. Yeah. Me, 23 year old man and my girlfriend, 21 year old woman have been together for four months now. She's great, beautiful, crazy, intelligent and has the best personality. Genuinely my dream girl. Except for when to comes it issue her camera roll for background. She dated a guy for four years in high school and the first half of college. She broke up with him last year and has dated other people since then. Leading up to me she never really talks about him unless telling a past story about her friend group which he was part of until he suddenly up and left. According to her, the reason they broke up is she realized they were on two different levels of maturity. When I mean she's intelligent, I mean she's well known around campus and every professor adores her and we go to a Big 12 university. University. She also got life threateningly sick and while he was worried for her, she knew he wouldn't be responsible enough to take care of her in the future. Progressive heart disease. They ended on good terms but don't talk anymore because he is kind of an introverted guy. According to her. The part I get upset about is every time she opens her camera roll to show me a past picture, she scrolls past photos or videos of him and her. I've brought this up to her before and she always laughs and says it's because she's too lazy to go through 30,000 photos. She hasn't deleted pictures since 2015. These photos and videos of him and her aren't romantic. They're high school shenanigans and usually involve her other friends. But I still can't help but feel jealous. Today she showed me a photo of her friends in 2018 and told me a funny story. He's in the photo. I said, you have a lot of pictures with him, in an annoyed tone. And she said, well, yeah, he grew up with me and my friends. We were kids together. It's like a look back into my childhood. I told her I didn't like those pictures and she offered to remove them and put them on a drop. I told her that wasn't enough. She told me they were precious memories she shared with her friends and she wasn't going to delete them just because he was in a relationship. I kind of raised my voice and told her she should go back to him if the memories were precious. She got up and said, I don't want to go back to him, but I also don't want to be with someone who is emotionally insecure. I have enough to deal with. And then left. I've debated on texting her and apologizing. Am I the asshole? Buddy, I think you've already lost her.

[Trevor]

I think maybe

[Shane]

you talked about how smart and intelligent and, and all this stuff about her. It sounds like she is. It sounds like she has no op. Op.

[Angela]

It's not looking op.

[Shane]

It's not looking good.

[Trevor]

It's not looking very good.

[Shane]

Yeah, I.

[Trevor]

This is something, this whole kind of conundrum, we'll call it, of deleting pictures of your ex. It's so. And it feels like such a case by case thing. Like I, I can understand both sides of it, but in a situation like this where it's like someone that she went to high school with was like a part of a friend group and someone who, you know, she ended on good terms with and like, as he said, there's. They're not romantic pictures. Like, I, I think it's very unreasonable to be like, I want you to delete those memories fully from your life. I think it's very her being, like, I'll take them off my phone and just put them on a drive. Like, I think that's very mature to be like, you won't have to see them if I'm showing you something. But yeah, I think asking her to just fully delete those things is, is very unfair.

[Shane]

It is four months in.

[Angela]

It's also this problem I think is going to get bigger and bigger. Like this is like kind of like an old fashioned thing about like you still have stuff of your ex like from the early 2000s that now just like even the idea of having 30,000 photos, that's like, now we take them more and we post some more and this is Only going to get, like, a bigger thing. We're just going to have bigger data logs of stuff, like, and it's just. It's just gonna be hard. That's. That's a lot of photos. And it's also. I keep thinking about it,

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[Shane]

Oh, no.

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[Shane]

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[Angela]

Because sometimes. Do you guys have the. On the iPhone, they have the featured photos. You'll turn to the left and, like. And you'll be, like, punched by a picture of you and your ex, like, on a date. And you're like, whoa, I didn't click on that. And it's just you, like, scrolling to the left. And I've heard people talk about that. And it's a feeling feature. I think there's gonna be some kind of app or something. Or you're gonna be able to call Steve Jobs, may he rest in peace, and go, delete all the pictures.

[Shane]

Get out the Ouija board.

[Angela]

Yeah. If these can, like, do all the. They're doing, they're gonna figure out a way. But it is a lot of work. And there's also so much more to this. It's just that he's threatened. It sounds.

[Trevor]

Yeah.

[Angela]

And it's control.

[Shane]

But it is an interesting new issue.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Right. Of course. Of like, oh, your Instagram, all your social handles and all the photos on your phone. How you go about that is very complicated. But at the end of the day, too, it's like, it's a matter of trust. It's like, what are you asking for here?

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And him being like, well, why don't you go back to him? It's just kind of like, all right, man, you blew it. You're blowing it.

[Angela]

Why don't you go back to him?

[Shane]

Yeah, it's like, because this is also photos, like, it's her whole entire high school experience. Yeah. Like, to delete a bunch of memories from high school. It's also. I know they're. They're problem is they're like, only 22, 23. But I'm like, it was high school. Like, I don't know.

[Angela]

It's also just, like, kind of so immature to, like, get upset when anyone has exes at all.

[Shane]

It's like, yeah, yeah, that was the thing.

[Angela]

They existed.

[Trevor]

Yeah. And it's like your life is so much bigger than, like, you know, the person that you're doing dating. It's like these. This person is like, this is the person that you're with. But your life was so much more than that at that time. And it's like those. Those pictures of you and your ex can be like. It's like, it. It might not be about the ex. It might be about, like, oh, this is a trip that we took together. And I, like, really remember, like, you know, going out of the country for the first time, things like that, where

[Angela]

it's like, it's all like, a beautiful turtle. Don't make me delete the turtle.

[Trevor]

Yeah, it's like you're. You're asking them to delete so much more than just like, oh, this person in their life.

[Shane]

I think it goes back to what we were talking about earlier is like, yeah, he's talking about feeling jealous and stuff. Like, stuff. It's like, you can talk to your girlfriend about that. You can just be like, oh, you. Like, I.

[Angela]

That's so true.

[Shane]

I feel insecure and stuff. Like, you know, like, because your ex, like, you know, he was part of your life for so long and stuff. And she'd probably be like, you have nothing to worry about.

[Angela]

That's so true. There's like such something so human that's like, I feel this kind of way, but I'm gonna make it about something else. Yeah, really hard. Because saying that I'm just jealous, threatened, or insecure is going to be so much worse than just hiding behind these photos.

[Shane]

And it's not going to end there. Like, she could delete all the photos and something else is going to come that's going to jog up his jealousy and feeling of insecurity. Because insecurity is just there. So the verdict was asshole, obviously. Comments? You're the asshole. She is right. You are emotionally insecure. Someone said you're the asshole. And deeply insecure, immature and controlling. Your girlfriend isn't obligated to erase years of photos from before you met because of your crippling insecurity. Grow up. You're the asshole. She showed you a group shot that happened to have her ex in it, asking her not to show you those pictures because they make you jealous as fuck. Fair. But expecting her to scrub four years worth of pictures when You've known her for four months. Is a stretch. Update.

[Trevor]

Update.

[Shane]

Do you think he fixes this or do you think he. He keeps going down?

[Angela]

I think he doubled down.

[Shane]

Really?

[Trevor]

I want to believe that. That he. That he got better.

[Angela]

I want to believe that.

[Trevor]

I want to believe that he. He fixed it.

[Shane]

Okay, let's see. Update the next day.

[Angela]

These are. These are fresh updates out of the oven.

[Shane]

Fresh. I texted her this morning and I apologize for crossing a line. She accepted the apology. The relationship wouldn't be continuing any further. She said a lack of self awareness and emotional maturity is not something she can overlook when dating someone. So I guess I'm single now. Update number two from this year.

[Angela]

And how long goes the other one?

[Shane]

20, 23. This is three years later.

[Angela]

Wait. Okay. Oh, my God. Okay.

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What?

[Angela]

Wait, don't. That's not fair. You're reading it before us.

[Shane]

But just read it. Read it, read it. Hi, all. This is actually my post. Mind you, this is three years later, so. Surprise. First of all, it was fake. Sorry. I know that sucks. I'm actually a woman, and that post was made during my last year as a journalism undergraduate. It was part of a capstone project where we determined how easy it is to mislead people on the Internet and to induce public outrage and how that influences far right and far left media. Pushing under the moderation of our professor, we each concocted stories or social media profiles to try and stir up controversy online. Thanks to the original post, safe to say I got an A. I also graduated with honors and with a special distinction for my thesis. The girlfriend was vaguely based on myself, except I have a kidney transplant and not a heart condition, and I exaggerated how well known I was on campus and my looks and intelligence for sympathy, of course. And who doesn't play up themselves in a fictional world? I played dnd. Since then I've been. Since then, I've been a fairly successful journalist. I've worked for both NPR and the Washington Post. I recently left my career behind, though, and I'm now in law school studying international law. I can't believe this post is making rounds again. And I debated keeping the story as is, but too many of you all were dming me the story. For future reference. Some of you are far too gullible. Don't believe everything you read on the Internet. That's how we got into this crazy situation we're in here in the US us.

[Angela]

Well, Op. He just reads it and I believe it. Okay.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Angela]

So, Opie, I'm. I'm not I didn't know.

[Trevor]

It's my job to believe it.

[Angela]

He reads it. Okay, Blame him.

[Trevor]

Blame him. The producer.

[Shane]

Don't blame us.

[Angela]

I read that online. I'd probably be like, some journalist probably wrote this as a study.

[Shane]

Anytime I tell that story, pretty awesome. It's also. Yeah, it's true. Like every story we read on Reddit. I'm like, yeah, I mean, it's. It's an anonymous story. I take them mostly as hypotheticals.

[Angela]

This is sick as hell, though.

[Shane]

Pretty good.

[Angela]

Wait, I'm obsessed. Can we. Wait, someone send her this. Send op. This comment op on the video.

[Shane]

But it is very easy to lie online. It's important to remember. God, that was Hell. Yeah.

[Angela]

I feel like I just did a cold plunge. An Internet cold plunge where you believed everything. You're like, wait, actually, no, I'm thinking.

[Shane]

I think at this point I'm not hit too hard by it because I'm just like, yeah, probably a lot of them are.

[Angela]

No, sure. I just. I just love being like. Like, hello?

[Trevor]

Yeah, I think I'm John.

[Shane]

This is. What would you do?

[Trevor]

The novelty of coming back like years later and being like, hey, by the way, this fake.

[Angela]

It is. Yeah. It is also a little old to be like. Like, I know we deal with what is on the Internet being fake or. Or real constantly. So it isn't like a. You're right. Things can be fake because there's so much of it in our day to day. Even like the news.

[Shane]

That's not that big of a surprise. It's just the way she did it and. And she wrote this before AI.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Took it to a whole new level. I also feel like it's a pretty mild story.

[Angela]

And. Yeah.

[Shane]

So I'm like, yeah, I don't have. This is such a real scenario. It's not like you wrote something that. I'm like, I can't believe that happened. I'm like, your boyfriend was jealous that you had photos of your ex in your phone.

[Trevor]

That's almost why I'm more surprised. This is one of the most believable, like, stories. Just like real story.

[Angela]

I think we could throw a penny and it would land on a jealous boyfriend of a girl's phone camera.

[Shane]

Yeah, I'm kind of like. I guess a part of me is also a little bit like, what was your. Like, what was your argument in this? In that, like, oh, this is dangerous. That I persuade people into thinking that boyfriends can be jealous.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

I'm like, it's like, oh, actually. But so that story was fake. Mind you guys are never jealous.

[Angela]

Exactly. You're so right. Like, if she made us believe something that we don't normally can get behind,

[Shane]

which does happen on the Internet and that is a very real thing. I, I think the thesis is true in that we should doubt everything we see on the Internet nowadays.

[Trevor]

But, but how. How about, you know, a fictional story that's causing us to look inside of ourselves and, and confront the issues that we have in our own insecurity.

[Angela]

That sounds like storytelling.

[Shane]

I think I, I read these in that kind of.

[Angela]

Me too.

[Shane]

Yeah, right. You know, cuz I was devastated when I found out Percy Jackson wasn't real.

[Trevor]

Yeah. That was really up when I found out my pen in school. Why isn't it a sword? Why is it a sword?

[Shane]

I believe when I found out the Hunger Games wasn't real, I read that, I was like, can you believe what they're doing? Oh my God, when am I going to have to go?

[Angela]

When I, when am I going to have to. I have to volunteer when I found out Shiz University wasn't a thing. I mean, my God.

[Shane]

Can I say though, there's an added layer to this too. And I think it's true for the Internet up of like it is important to doubt everything. I say that hosting this show, right? Like be entertained by the Internet, but do not take life advice because you might go, you might go to Reddit and write a story asking for advice about like your relationship or something. And keep in mind that you might be getting marriage advice from a 12 year old. It's like so like just do not know who's commenting. You don't know who's on the show.

[Angela]

Who's that 12 year old? We need her on the show.

[Shane]

Just don't know what the is like because it's anonymous.

[Angela]

Okay. This is what I was gonna say. What goes on in your guys's brain when you're reading these? Do you picture like, are you picturing the people visually?

[Shane]

Picture. I picture.

[Angela]

I picture them as Pixar characters, like super soft.

[Shane]

Whoa.

[Angela]

Kind of like, like, like the dad. I was picturing him like quintessential like the dad and inside out.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Angela]

Like I'm not like really thinking in realism a lot with these because it's just kind of bonkers.

[Trevor]

I don't see picturing people. I feel like maybe in my head I'm like, like, well now, now you're making me think.

[Angela]

I know. Think about how you listen. No, no, just think about that, you

[Trevor]

know, and it's funny. This is Interesting. Now that you made me think. The first story that we read about the dad, what did you think he looked like? You know, it's not actually about what the dad looked like, but it's weird that my head. When I imagined them, like, going up to the house, it was. It was my house from my childhood. I was like, picturing. I was like. When I had to picture a, like, suburban house, I like my was I. I went to my house for my childhood.

[Shane]

There you go.

[Trevor]

I don't know what that.

[Angela]

Brains are crazy. Brains are crazy.

[Shane]

Brains are crazy. What I found out some people do not think in images and, like, can't think in images. I was blown away by that.

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Trevor]

See, anytime I hear something like that, I'm like, what do you mean?

[Shane]

Because I, like, truly cannot. Cannot form. Cannot form images in their head.

[Trevor]

See? But like, I don't know if I can form images in my head because I don't know what that means to you.

[Shane]

Close your eyes. Can you see a red apple in front of you?

[Trevor]

Like, like, am I seeing, like, as if there's a TV screen here and there?

[Shane]

Whatever you want. There's you you can picture.

[Angela]

Let me try another one that we might cut. Boobs.

[Shane]

Yeah, picture boobs.

[Angela]

You see it?

[Shane]

No, I can only describe boobs in my head. I can only see the word boobs.

[Trevor]

I can only see one pair of boobs.

[Shane]

Our final story. Mysterious vibrating in my bedroom.

[Trevor]

Bend there.

[Angela]

Okay. It's not gonna suck itself.

[Shane]

This was posted on rbi Reddit Bureau of Investigation. A subreddit where people use the power of the Internet to solve real world problems. Now I'm writing.

[Trevor]

Piqued my interest.

[Shane]

What's in my ass? I don't know.

[Trevor]

I was investigating the male G spot.

[Angela]

That's crazy, you guys.

[Shane]

It was really documented and I don't know what I put up my.

[Angela]

You've been reading Reddit all day and you ended your day with that one?

[Shane]

All right, I'm not going crazy, but there's a vibrating in my room that I hear from time to time, and it's making me paranoid. I live alone. No one else lives with me but my dog. The buzz I hear sporadically sounds exactly like my iPhone. Just a quick short vibration about a half a second. It's not my iPhone as I hear it when I'm actively using my phone, and it's not my phone phone. It's not regular. It doesn't happen in intervals. It's completely random. Sometimes I hear it often. Sometimes days go by. It's too quiet. To hear when I'm watching tv. Almost always when there's no other sound. Sometimes it sounds like it's coming from under my bed. Sometimes it sounds like it's coming from the ceiling. I can't for the life of me figure out what it is. I live pretty basic. I have a light mounted on the ceiling, carbon monoxide detector, and an iPhone charger in my room. That's all the electric things in my room. Could it be coming from inside the drywall, plumbing maybe? I'm not crazy. This is a real sound, but it happens so infrequently, I can't pinpoint it at all. Okay, what do we think it is? Vibrating? Just some something. And it's kind of different parts of

[Angela]

the room I have in my apartment, like, heard buzzing and I thought it was a phantom. Like me thinking I got texts before and I. But like, I have upstairs neighbors and like, I don't know, like, I've always been like, oh, it sounds like a buzz. Like there's so much going on. It's the WI fi. I don't know.

[Trevor]

I've been going through this actually in the last couple weeks because I've been hearing this sound that's like a little sound, and I don't know what it was. And it's one of those things that, like, I just can't be asked to get up off the couch and, like, try and figure out what it is. But then I asked Raven and I was like, is that your computer? And she's like, oh, I've heard that. And she's like, I thought it was your computer. And I'm like. I'm like, if you're sitting in your office and it's not coming from your computer. Computer, I don't. I don't know where it's coming from. And it's like, kind of been driving me crazy, but also like, in a way that I'm like, I don't. God, what's going on?

[Angela]

We're all so cooked. We're hearing sounds and we don't know what's going on.

[Shane]

We don't know what the it is. And it's like, we don't know what.

[Trevor]

The stakes are high enough for me to figure it out, man.

[Shane]

Okay, so someone commented, you say you live alone, but are you in a single family home or in an apartment? Yeah, my old apartment had some pretty thick walls, but the floor and ceilings were not hear and possibly feel. My upstairs and downstairs neighbors. Phones vibrate. Yeah, mostly upstairs because I think it was on a table so the vibration amplified through my ceiling. You don't live in an apartment. I don't know. Opie said one bedroom house. Whoa. That makes me think, like, it's ventilation or plumbing, like the only thing. Or a rat. Like a big fat rat with an iPhone.

[Angela]

A rat getting so many emails.

[Trevor]

Like, you know how like your AC unit, like cycles it like starts up. Like it could be something where like, you know, know it rustles on and there's like a little vibrating as it's also.

[Angela]

I don't know, maybe one of my devices is listening.

[Shane]

Maybe it's the government. I.

[Angela]

You know, everything's listening to everything.

[Shane]

Yeah, I mean, that's kind of true.

[Angela]

You know what I mean?

[Shane]

I'm not going to doubt that.

[Angela]

I can go, hey, Alexa. Anybody's going to anyway. Keep going.

[Shane]

Well, a lot of listeners just got pissed off.

[Trevor]

Google it's not going to suck itself.

[Shane]

Sorry. Someone said, oh God, this would bother me so much. Maybe the CO detector. Maybe a fan or some electrical buzz coming from the light fan. Maybe something with the water heater or WI fi modem router. What other rooms are butted up with the bedroom? Start taking note of the times of day. You hear it most often, obviously. I would guess it's mostly at night when you're in bed, as that's the quietest time you're in your room. But see if there are other times you notice it. Note what other things are or aren't happening in the house. That should narrow it down at least a little. Opie said, that's a good idea to keep a log, see if the times match up or if there's a pattern. We'll do that. Someone said just to add a sense of panic, let's mention that there's phantom vibration syndrome.

[Angela]

That's what I was thinking. Like we're all buzzing all the time. Like, who for the knows?

[Shane]

Op said, oh, I've had phantom phone ring for years. I've always had that. This isn't physical, it's auditory. I hear it buzzing. Sorry. So phantom vibration syndrome is a real thing? According to Wikipedia, Phantom vibration syndrome, or phantom ringing syndrome is the perception that one's mobile phone is VI ringing when it's not. PVS is technically a hallucination because your brain is perceiving something that isn't actually happening. So is that like that happens to

[Angela]

me all the time?

[Shane]

Because that's how, like, what we are seeing and hearing and everything is not actually what's in front of us. It's what our brain is interpreting so it makes sense that if emotion or something. Your brain is so used to phone vibration that it's like, that's what that is. So it makes you feel that.

[Angela]

And I'm used to that sound. I'm used to that feel. I'm like used to it on my couch and like feeling it. And especially when I'm expecting calls and it's during the day. I'm like always being. I'm like, I check it, nothing changed.

[Shane]

Okay?

[Angela]

But I get texts, so don't worry, guys. I like, I get a lot, dude.

[Trevor]

Like I'm getting calls and texts, I swear sometimes.

[Shane]

And I think I get like a lot.

[Trevor]

Always getting along. And it's like, that's probably why I have it because it's like I'm just

[Shane]

always getting hit up.

[Trevor]

Like I'm like, surely I'm getting a text right now because I'm always just like hit up.

[Shane]

Update.

[Angela]

Okay.

[Shane]

1.5 years later.

[Trevor]

Took him one and a half years to figure out it out.

[Shane]

Damn. Any last guesses?

[Angela]

Alien.

[Trevor]

Could be. Could be.

[Shane]

Alien.

[Trevor]

You look. I'll hop on the alien train.

[Shane]

I'll go with. I'm going to go with some weirds in the walls. A drone.

[Angela]

Drone.

[Shane]

Drone. Okay, I'm about to read it.

[Angela]

Yeah, that's usually how that goes. Yeah.

[Shane]

Well, any last guesses?

[Angela]

Okay, thank you. Thank you.

[Shane]

Posted about a strange buzzing in my house over a year ago. And I never was able to figure out what I it was. I heard it so infrequently and irregularly that it was almost impossible to figure out what it was. Every time I'd hear it, I'd immediately stop what I was doing and go real silent, waiting with bated breath, hoping it would buzz again, almost like a cruel joke. It would only buzz after I gave up waiting and went back to whatever it was I was doing. Even up to last week, I'd still hear it. Sometimes multiple times a day. Sometimes weeks would go by without hearing it. I'm pretty sure I figured it out. And it's comically stupid what it was. So I was sleeping in the middle of the night, like 3am and I woke up and was in a semi sleep daze kind of drift, drifting. The world was real quiet and it was a deep silence and I heard the buzz. But for the first time it almost immediately repeated and kept repeating in frequency, almost like a rhythm. I was 100% sure it was my phone ringing on vibrate. So I started groping around the bed to find my phone because the buzzing sounded exactly like my Phone buzzing every two seconds for about half a second. Once I found my phone, the buzzing continued, but I couldn't quite place where it was coming from. This is going to sound crazy and I'm amazed this is the source. But eventually my alertness and physical movements woke my dog up. And the buzzing immediately the buzzing was my stupid shepherd's exhales. Like his every exhale or possible inhale I'm not sure was buzzing exactly emulating a cell phone buzz.

[Trevor]

This happened to me like two days ago.

[Angela]

That's crazy.

[Trevor]

This happened to me. I can't believe I didn't think of it. This happened to me two days ago. I was sitting, I was laying on the couch and my dog, I like, had my arm down and he laid. Napkin had like, laid his head and his neck was resting on my arm. And then I kept feeling this buzzing and I was like, why is. I thought my phone was buzzing, but then it was on the armchair and I was like, what? And then I realized it was like exhale.

[Angela]

It was a journalist showing us that Internet.

[Shane]

It's actually John Napkin goes. I've actually been seeing. Cannot trust anything you hear vibrating.

[Trevor]

That's crazy. That's craziness.

[Angela]

Happened to you.

[Shane]

Oh, my God. I'm decently confident that this is the same buzzing that I've been hearing for years. And also the reason that I've been unable to source it, because every time I hear it, I'll get super alert and tense, which immediately wakes up my dog as he's super attuned to my behavior and his breath buzzes, stops. Then when I relax and give up the search, he goes back to sleep as the situation is over. That's when I hear it again. And he again wakes up to see what's got me agitated. I also only ever hear it during moments of calm when I'm lounging, never when I'm active and moving about the house. So this would make sense that it's only ever when my boy is sleeping. I'm pretty satisfied with this answer. And when I do hear it again, I'll be on the lookout to see if it's the dog nose next time as well.

[Angela]

It happened. That's crazy.

[Trevor]

But it was like I felt the vibration arm.

[Shane]

Like I don't think I would have heard it.

[Trevor]

So I felt it and I was like, what was that?

[Shane]

And I was like, oh.

[Trevor]

Oh, it's.

[Angela]

That's so funny because then every time you do you. You move like your dog is going to stop.

[Shane]

Like, what's going on?

[Angela]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Let's get it. What a.

[Trevor]

What a prank.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Angela]

We looking for that buzz again? What's that buzz we're looking for?

[Shane]

He's like, the dogs. Dogs are just like, what the. Yeah, yeah. The dog's going, did you hear that, dude?

[Angela]

Yeah, the dog's that. I heard it too. Where was it?

[Shane]

I heard that, dude.

[Angela]

Honestly, I bet it's the cops.

[Trevor]

Yeah, dude, Something's in the walls, man. You got to bust open the walls. Thumbs in the walls.

[Shane]

My cat's purrs are, like, too obvious, I feel like. But with cats. Cats make you less anxious because they're unlike dogs, which I feel like are by your side a lot more. Cats are just all over the place all the time. So you'll hear weird noises, and you're just like, that's probably my cat getting up to shenanigans.

[Angela]

And you're just used to weird noise.

[Shane]

You're just like, yeah. Like, here's something. The only thing that wakes me up is I'm like, I'll hear something. I'll be like, they're on the counters. And I'll be like, you, you bastards. Like, like, I hear you. Get off. They'll just hear them all over the counters, on the counters again. Like, the funniest was, there was one time. This was like a. We were living in a different apartment, and we had built these, like, shelves so that the cats could get up to above the kitchen.

[Angela]

Yes.

[Trevor]

I love those. Yeah.

[Shane]

And Bones was. Was unable to hop up high enough. But one of the nights he tried, and I. We wake up to, like a crash. We hear like a. And then. And then I. I run out and I just see Bones in the middle of the floor, just like his tail puff. Just kind of like. And I was like, did you fall? Hit the trash can and hit the crowd? Cuz he was just so embarrassed. Just kind of like, he's like, no, dude, that was someone else. He was like, that. That wasn't that.

[Angela]

It's like, dude, there's a weird buzzing sound. It sounds like a cat's falling.

[Shane]

I don't know what happened.

[Trevor]

What's the threshold?

[Angela]

I.

[Trevor]

Sometimes I think about, like, what's the threshold of weird noises you could hear before? You could be like, is it. Is my place haunted? Because I'll watch, like, ghost hunting shows, and they'll just be like, in there silently, and they'll hear, like, the littlest noise. They'll be like, oh, my God.

[Shane]

I'm like.

[Trevor]

I feel like I'm always hearing noises.

[Angela]

I hear so much and it's make

[Shane]

a lot of noise. It's why. Okay, this. Because people know I'm a bit of a skeptic, right? Yeah. Now, I'm not saying I don't believe in those things. It's just that so many people. I'm like, if you want to believe in the things, that's what you're going to hear. Because we're talking about how our brains perceive things. So if you're telling yourself it's a ghost, I'm like, you're more likely to, like, make that pattern make sense to you. Yeah.

[Angela]

Yep. You ready for this? I'm going to wrap it all up in a bow.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Angela]

Yes. That same thing.

[Trevor]

So, like, I was thinking,

[Shane]

killed, killed, kill.

[Angela]

Good. Wow. It was the dog all along.

[Shane]

It was the dog all along. This time you can blame it on the dog.

[Angela]

And now you can.

[Shane]

Can. Anyways, thank you both for being here for all these updates.

[Angela]

You're the best, man, bro. You're the.

[Shane]

You're the.

[Angela]

You're the best guys ever again.

[Trevor]

I love you guys. This is awesome, this show.

[Angela]

It's time for bed.

[Shane]

Lights up all. Well, guys, it's time for bed. I know for some of you it's 11:30 in the morning, but it's time for bed. Sorry, I make the rules. Thank you, Trevor and Angela and. And thank you all for watching and hey, we'll see you next week. Update. We're having another show next week.

[Angela]

Update. Another episode comes out. Love you.

[Shane]

Bye.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

And Doug, there's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual. Even if it means sitting front row at a comedy show.

Everyone, check out this guy and his bird. What is this, your first date?

[Shane]

Oh, no.

[Liberty Mutual Advertisers]

We help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together. We're married. Me to a human, him to a bird.

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league anyways.

Only pay for what you [e-mail].

[Shane]

liberty. Liberty.

[Angela]

Liberty.

[Shane]

Liberty.