Ships That SUNK | Reading Reddit Stories

Summary

Smosh Reads Reddit Stories – "Ships That SUNK | Reading Reddit Stories" – July 25, 2026

Overview of the Episode

This episode of Smosh Reads Reddit Stories, hosted by Shayne Topp and featuring guests Arasha and Damian, dives headfirst into the wild, unpredictable world of Reddit relationships. The trio reacts to a themed collection of “relationship shipwrecks” drawn from subreddits like r/AmITheAsshole, r/relationship_advice, r/trueoffmychest, and even r/boardgames. Through a mix of laughter, honest advice, and empathetic commentary, the Smosh crew explores stories involving possessive mothers-in-law, tragic prom nights, board game-fueled breakups, unrequited feelings between friends, and a “catman” boyfriend. The tone is comedic but insightful, and the group frequently highlights universal takeaways about boundaries, communication, and self-respect.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Am I the Asshole? – The Birthday Dinner and the Possessive Mom (03:16–18:36)

Story Summary (03:16):

• Woman leaves boyfriend Matt’s birthday dinner after his mother insists on sitting between them, mocking her in front of the family. Matt later blames her for overreacting.

Discussion Highlights:

• Possessive Parent Dynamics: The group unpacks the familiar trope of moms threatened by their children's partners.
• Accountability: Shayne and Arasha are adamant that Matt’s failure to stand up for his girlfriend is the real issue.
• Groupthink: Damian notes how social pressure can make dysfunctional dynamics look “normal” within families.
• Respectful Exit: The crew praises the OP for quietly excusing herself rather than escalating.
• Long-Term Outlook: "What's the wedding gonna look like? ...the pregnancy announcement?" (07:45, Arasha)—illustrating how unresolved issues will intensify over time.
• Validation: Comments and an OP update show the Reddit community sides with her and she's decided to end the relationship.

Notable Quotes:

• “Matt, it was your last birthday because I’m going to kill you.” – Arasha (05:36)
• “It is important to stand your ground with these things. They do not get better. They absolutely do not get better.” – Shayne (12:01)
• “If I was Matt, I would have blurted out, what the fuck?” – Redditor via Shayne (16:07)

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2. Relationship Advice – Girlfriend Goes to Prom With Another Guy While BF is Hospitalized (19:01–33:17)

Story Summary (19:01):

• 19-year-old suffers traumatic brain injury, can’t attend girlfriend’s prom after selling his beloved gaming PC to buy a ticket. His girlfriend goes with another guy. He feels devastated, but doesn’t want to be resentful or make her feel guilty.

Discussion Highlights:

• Maturity and Pain: The hosts are touched by the OP’s self-awareness and emotional intelligence.
• Jealousy and Communication: Damian stresses it must be safe to discuss uncomfortable feelings, even if there’s no clear “right.”
• Long Distance and Priorities: The cast debates whether the girlfriend’s decision to fully shift focus to the prom is selfish, or just young priorities in action.
• Empathy for OP: Losing both his PC and the trip hits especially hard for the group. They joke about fundraising a PC for him.
• Life Lessons: Arasha and Shayne agree that these heartbreaks teach valuable lessons—they hate it, but “maybe you have to go through this” (28:43, Shayne).
• Gaming PC Mini-Arc: Damian (a gamer) insists the loss is real: “That’s not just an item. That’s your hobby. That’s a connection with friends.” (29:08)

Notable Quotes:

• “You sweet boy.” – Arasha (21:25)
• “You have to be able to voice [your feelings], if a relationship’s okay for you.” – Damian (29:08)
• "This is the beginning of one of those coming-of-age movies." – Shayne (30:20)
• “Can we send him a gaming PC?” – Arasha (31:34)

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3. Relationship Advice – Board Game Breakup (34:40–47:06)

Story Summary (34:40):

• OP’s girlfriend ends their 3-year relationship after a competitive game of Catan, accusing him of caring more about winning than her happiness.

Discussion Highlights:

• Underlying Issues: The collective take is, “It wasn’t about the board game.” The board game was a catalyst for a deeper problem of feeling under-prioritized.
• Competitiveness in Relationships: Damian and Shayne both recount real stories of game-night drama—how competition can sneakily expose relationship cracks.
• Perception Gaps: They point out that someone’s retelling might ignore a repeated pattern that the other partner feels.
• Self-Awareness and Communication: They argue both self-awareness and the ability to bring up frustrations are crucial for health in a relationship.

Notable Quotes:

• “It also wasn’t a one off.... there’s a lot under that.” – Damian (36:10)
• “Do you know what your problem is?” – Damian, highlighting the break-up phrase (36:18)
• “You leave it on the field.” – Shayne on handling board game competitiveness (41:57)
• “It’s not about the dishes. It was never about the game.” – Quoted Redditor (46:04)

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4. TrueOffMyChest – Best Friend’s Proposal Speech Is About OP (48:58–63:16)

Story Summary (48:58):

• Female OP realizes her male best friend's proposal speech for his girlfriend is actually about acts and details that OP has done for him (not his girlfriend). After urging him to revise, he reveals he’s been in love with OP, but OP is gay and tells his girlfriend everything before he can twist the story.

Discussion Highlights:

• Unrequited Love and Emotional Honesty: Shayne speculates the “proposal” is a veiled confession. The cast notes the proposal speech is full of love for acts OP did, not the actual girlfriend.
• Respect and Boundaries: Damian worries about boundaries, but Arasha points out the onus is also on Jim (the friend) for not communicating.
• Update Drama: Shayne reads the emotional update—Jim admits his plan was to “make OP realize she truly loved him all along,” ignoring that OP is a lesbian. Mia, the girlfriend, takes OP’s side.
• Internet Applause for Mia: The group celebrates Mia for believing OP and not Jim’s spin.

Notable Quotes:

• “He said he hoped laying it all out for me would make me realize I truly loved him all along. I guess the gay thing didn’t really stick with him.” – OP’s update read by Shayne (61:44)
• "Jim, you fucking fool." – Arasha (62:49)
• “There are a lot of stories of people before they get married, confessing their love for someone else and then being like, no, there’s nothing there.” – Shayne (61:17)
• “Woman in tears? Yes. Woman in STEM? I love this.” – Arasha (63:30)

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5. Relationships – The Catman Boyfriend (64:52–76:10)

Story Summary (64:52):

• OP’s boyfriend becomes obsessed with imitating their cat after an initial joke, escalating to putting dinner plates on the floor, scratching posts, and meowing during sex—despite her repeated requests to stop.

Discussion Highlights:

• Comedy’s Limits: The cast finds “I’m Catman. It’s my comedy routine,” both hilarious and tragic past a certain point.
• Fetish or Escapism?: Some Redditors suggest a potential fetish, but the group leans toward immaturity or compulsive need for attention.
• Relationship Red Flags: They emphasize the importance of partners listening and changing when told something truly upsets the other.
• How To Kill a Bit: Shayne references clowning workshops—the brutal lesson that repeating a joke ruins it, and knowing when to stop is vital in comedy—and in life.
• Final Advice: OP needs to seriously reconsider the relationship since her boundaries are being persistently bulldozed.

Notable Quotes:

• "Responding with the phrase, 'It’s my comedy routine. I’m Catman,' is objectively, deeply funny." – Damian (67:38)
• “You don’t recover from that... you don’t come back from that.” – Damian (75:05)
• “This is a story about how difficult comedy is.” – Arasha (72:21)
• “Get him, boys.” – Damian (75:37)
• “When she discusses her ex-boyfriend totally meowing, that’s her future.” – Arasha (76:01)

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Notable Quotes (By Speaker & Timestamp)

• Arasha: “Matt, it was your last birthday because I’m going to kill you.” (05:36)
• Shayne: “It is important to stand your ground with these things. They do not get better.” (12:01)
• Damian: “You have to be able to voice it if a relationship’s okay for you.” (29:08)
• Shayne: “This is the beginning of one of those coming-of-age movies.” (30:20)
• Damian: “It also wasn’t a one off... there’s a lot under that.” (36:10)
• Redditor via Shayne: “It’s never about the dishes. It was never about the game.” (46:04)
• Shayne/Reading OP: “He said he hoped laying it all out for me would make me realize I truly loved him all along. I guess the gay thing didn’t really stick with him.” (61:44)
• Arasha: "Jim, you fucking fool." (62:49)
• Damian: "Responding with the phrase, 'It’s my comedy routine. I’m Catman,' is objectively, deeply funny." (67:38)
• Damian: "You don’t recover from that... you don’t come back from that." (75:05)
• Arasha: “When she discusses her ex-boyfriend totally meowing, that’s her future.” (76:01)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

| Segment | Time | | ----------------------------------- | ------------ | | Am I the Asshole – Possessive Mom | 03:16–18:36 | | Prom Disaster / OP Loses Everything | 19:01–33:17 | | Board Game Breakup | 34:40–47:06 | | Proposal Speech About OP | 48:58–63:16 | | Catman Boyfriend | 64:52–76:10 |

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Tone and Takeaways

The trio's comedic but empathetic rapport turns these "Reddit ships that sunk" into a mix of roast, validation, and genuine reflection. The show gently mocks the absurd, but consistently urges listeners to stand up for themselves, question broken relationship patterns, and communicate feelings—even if it means walking away. The hosts also stress the importance of perspective: what feels like the end of the world at 19 will make you wiser at 29, and what seems “normal” in a family might just be a generational cycle desperate for a reset.

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For those who haven’t listened, “Ships That SUNK” is an hour of sharp, loving, and laugh-out-loud analysis of our favorite Reddit relationship messes—full of heartfelt "leave him/girl, drop his ass" moments, practical advice, and the eternally important reminder not to meow during sex.

Transcript

[A]

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Call 1-800-GRAINGER click grainger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.

[B]

This episode of Red Stories is sponsored by Doordash. Got yout Delivered. Doordash. Hi, welcome to Smosh Reads Reddit Stories. I'm Shane and today's theme is relationships. And I am joined by two lovely people who I think in their life have maybe experienced a relationship or two or three. I don't know, maybe. Arasha and Damian are here. Couple.

[C]

Hey, everybody. Great to be here.

[A]

We've had lots of relationships.

[B]

So we've got a bunch of relationship stories today. I like the producers put in a little note of like, ferry, what would you do? Coded relationship stories. John Quinones.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Right over there.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I am particularly excited for this because I've been watching Couples therapy again.

[A]

Oh, you love that.

[C]

Oh, cool, dude.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I am fascinated by relationships. It was what, like, inspired me to go study psychology.

[A]

Oh, really?

[B]

I was just like, it's like human behavior. But I really am fascinated by not romantic relationships particularly, just relationships between people and the connection. The connection, communication. How so much of it is vibes, but so much of it is kind of like simple things that build up.

[A]

I totally agree. I totally agree. It's just interesting how, especially in a larger group, how some people tend to gravitate toward each other and form their own circles. It's interesting.

[C]

And some people are kind of the outsider, the rebel of the group that kind of marches to the beat of their own drum.

[A]

Yeah, well, similarly, but actually not at all. I started watching Love island last night.

[B]

Oh, yeah. That as of recording this, it just started. So by the time this airs in July, all of the cast members will have been canceled.

[A]

Oh, 100%.

[C]

Is this the American one?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Love Island, USA. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I am saying this now that I'm like, I shouldn't watch it. But I know by the time this airs, I'm gonna be hooked.

[A]

You have to. The pilot was juicy Last night already. Uh huh. New season, everybody's kissed everybody.

[B]

I will say, like just human connection is just as a human you're fas Like I am fascinated by it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I always loved the UK version and I think that was the version that appealed to me most because people are so polite in general until things blow up. I think the moment it became like, oh, love island us, I'm like, well, yeah, I know what's gonna happen.

[B]

It's becoming a little too reality TV at times, but still probably gonna watch it.

[A]

Still iconic.

[B]

All right, well, let's see how juicy these stor our first story comes from. Am I the asshole underscore? Would I bethe asshole public? There's so many different Am I the

[C]

asshole underscore Kingdom hearts title at that point.

[B]

Yeah. Shot hack sign.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This was posted April 2025. Am I the asshole for leaving my boyfriend bidet dinner after his mom took my seat? So, am I the asshole for leaving my boyfriend's birthday dinner after his mom took my seat?

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Ooh.

[A]

I love when it's not so clear cut and we get to have a discussion about this.

[C]

A mom has can't wait till one

[B]

minute from now where it's like the

[C]

mom physically picked me up and threw me. Yeah.

[A]

And it's not clear cut and I

[B]

don't know who's in the wrong.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I, a 25 year old woman, have been dating my boyfriend Matt, a 27 year old man, for almost two years. His family is very close and his mom in particular has always been a little possessive. I've tried not to make a big deal out of it, but it's clear she doesn't like that I take up his time and she's made passive aggressive comments like, I hope I don't lose my son to some girl. Even though we've been together for a while and I've made every effort to be kind and respectful to her. Anyway, last weekend was Matt's birthday. He invited me to dinner and his family at a nice restaurant. I dressed up, got him a gift I knew he'd love and was honestly looking forward to the night. When we arrived, I noticed his mom had saved the seat right next to him for herself. That's fine, whatever. I sat on his other side. But right before we ordered, his mom made a joke about how I always need to be next to Matt and said, let's see how you handle a little separation. Then she literally stood up, looked at me and said, scooch, sweetie. Motioning for me to move down a seat so she could sit between us. Everyone at the table laughed, Matt included. I was so stunned, I just quietly got up and Moved for about five minutes. I sat there feeling small and humiliated while she leaned over Matt like he was her date. So I stood up, grabbed my bag, and said, actually, I think I'm gonna head out. Hope you have a great birthday, Matt. And I left. Matt blew up my phone later, saying I completely overreacted, embarrassed him in front of his family and can't take a joke. His mom texted me a sorry you were so sensitive message. We. Which just made it worse.

[A]

I need to calm down. I need to calm down. I need to take a laugh.

[C]

It's okay, Arasha. It's not clear cut. Let's keep.

[A]

It's not clear cut.

[B]

It's not clear cut.

[C]

This could go anywhere.

[B]

No, we need more context.

[A]

It's not clear cut. It's not clear cut.

[B]

It's not clear cut. Now he's not speaking to me until I apologize. I honestly feel like they were the rude ones, but it was his birthday dinner, so now I'm second guessing everything.

[A]

Well, guess what, Matt, it was your last birthday because I'm gonna kill you.

[C]

Damn. That's. I.

[A]

It's not clear cut. It's not clear cut.

[B]

I think. Do you think everybody at this birthday just lives in terror of Matt's mom? Cause they all laughed. They all laughed. Like, they're just like, ha, ha ha. It's that Twilight Zone episode where the kid can distort reality. So we're just like, yes, Billy, we all love it.

[C]

Billy, I'm gonna send you to the cornfield again. And she did. One step away from that was the proverbial cornfield.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

And that's not good.

[B]

Saying, like, oh, you're just always hanging around him. It's like, yeah, she's his girlfriend.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Like, it's a birthday. The girlfriend or boyfriend sits next to.

[A]

This is the worst. This is the worst kind of thing that comes up in these stories is when there's a mom that is jealous of your kid's partner. Like, those are completely different feelings. It's a completely different department. You're blending all of it. You're making it weird, like, by calling it out and being like, you always want to be next to him. Like, yeah, duh.

[C]

So wild and. Sorry. Didn't she say that she reserved the seat next to Matt on the other side for herself?

[B]

Yeah. So the mom was on one side of Matt. She was here, or. Yeah, she was here. And then the mom literally was like, move down and I'm going to now switch over to here.

[C]

Yeah. So clearly it was not about the mom. Being close to Matt, it was about

[B]

making sure that she's farther away.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

But the important part that we need to discuss is that it's still Matt's fault.

[C]

It is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because Matt didn't say anything.

[B]

He did not say anything. And everybody laughed, and he laughed too. And then he texted her, blaming her for it.

[C]

You embarrassed me.

[A]

You're overreacting.

[B]

I do think this is, unfortunately, one of those situations. She, like, stood her ground. She basically communicated this. Like, this is insane.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And he's not taking it seriously. So it is one of those things of, like, this is gonna take a lot of work for him to unwind. He clearly doesn't want to. So you.

[C]

Yeah, it's not her job.

[B]

You either deal with this forever or you gotta.

[A]

And that, I think, is such an important point, because this is just at a birthday dinner. What's the wedding gonna look like?

[B]

Oh, my God, that would be a nightmare.

[A]

What's the pregnancy announcement gonna look like? Like, you know, if they choose to have kids, like, the mom is gonna be rushing in, being like, oh, my God, I'm so excited, and she's gonna be pushed to the side.

[C]

I'm actually in labor. I'm birthing the baby.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That's the tough thing about relationships in general. And a lot of people discover it for the first time with, like, roommates. When you're just moving out of, you know, your family home for the first time.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You are raised in a different environment, and the set of rules that you have of, like, what is normal is gonna be completely different than someone else's normal. So, like, we hear this and we go, whoa. And Op hears this and goes, oh, my God, I can't believe this is happening. But everyone around the table is, like, laughing, like, yeah, that's how it goes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, you brought up the like, oh, I wonder if they were like,

[B]

ha ha ha ha ha.

[C]

But I feel like in that moment, I'd be looking of like, isn't this fucking crazy? No. Are we all seeing this? It's hard. Cause you're just not gonna change, like, nine people's minds.

[A]

Totally, totally. And you just feel so alone, too. Cause then you're like, then I must be the crazy one if everybody isn't reacting like that. But she's certainly not. In fact, I actually really respect the way that she handled it, too. I like that she took a few minutes and she realized, like, I'm feeling shitty. I'm probably gonna ruin this dinner if I stay here and make a Big fuss out of it.

[C]

Oh, that's the feeling of like, if I stay, it's gonna be awful, but if I go, it's gonna make a scene.

[A]

But I think she handled it like, in a professional way. Truly. Just being like, I hope you have a great dinner. Like, I should excuse myself and ducked out.

[B]

And it's his birthday, this is his family. But in kind of that way. I mean, this is maybe just how I view things. But like, if I'm at a family event and I bring a friend, or like, you know, if bring my girlfriend, my wife, and I'm like, I kinda do feel responsible, but I'm like, this is my family. You're kind of the outside one here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So we have our norms, we have whatever.

[A]

So like, I'm gonna take care of this person.

[B]

So being humiliated publicly in front of not your family is so like, yeah, what is that?

[A]

Sweetie, scooch over.

[B]

No, that's a power.

[C]

It was a stupid power. And like, look, I'm very close with my mom. We've been through a lot. Love my mom. We have a great relationship. And. And she's like a big part of my life. But never once have I been dating someone and she's been like, they're gonna take you away. Like, it's always been like, hey, if you are happy, I am happy. That's all I care about. I hope you get to come visit soon.

[A]

Cause your closeness should not have to do with anybody else in your life.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Those are completely separate. And this mother is like choosing to feel threatened by his girlfriend, which is just weird. Childish.

[B]

Childish. It's fucking weird.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I've never understood it. Cause my dynamic with my mom is nothing like that either. But I hear, I read these types of stories all the damn time. And I'm just like, what is going on? It's really gross.

[A]

It's upsetting too. Cause they've been together for a while, so it's like, surely this has had to have come up in some way. And she's had to express she's not feeling totally true.

[C]

Well, she was saying she's like, I sort of ignored it before.

[B]

Yeah, it's just a breaking point, you

[C]

know, I always have a hard time finding that line too, of like, when to speak up when something is uncomfortable or like, you know, ah, maybe I should just let it chill for a second. I don't have to call out everything. But like, after two years, it turns into this.

[A]

Well, and this is also, again, a bigger, I think attack. It isn't just like, oh, she was sitting there, and I was, like, upset. Like, she literally called her out at this dinner.

[B]

Yeah. She didn't do any. She didn't even throw the first move. The mom attacked her.

[A]

Yeah. And if her partner's not standing with her, I ultimately think it's inappropriate. And I think. I think the grounds of leaving totally valid.

[B]

I think they are at two years. If the family dynamic is that toxic and he is okay with it. Yes, it is. Like, where do you see this relationship going?

[C]

He just doesn't see the problem. My hope for this person would be, like, after this clearly is gonna be a breakup. Maybe that happens again in a few years. And then he starts to go, wait a minute. Or they don't learn, and they're just sad forever and it's everyone else's fault. Yeah.

[B]

Or they unfortunately find someone who tolerates it, like, is afraid. It is important to stand your ground with these things. They do not get better. They absolutely do not get better. In fact, they will. Like, you mentioned the wedding, the pregnancy. They are gonna get worse and worse. So you have to take it seriously.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You have to take it seriously. I think even in the smaller examples, before it gets scared.

[A]

Agreed. Agreed. But there's not zero hope for Matt. I think he could. If there's an update, I think he could possibly understand, realize, and be like, I need to have some conversations with my family and turn it around.

[B]

Cause it's a scary thing to confront your family.

[A]

Of course.

[B]

And you also. It takes a lot of unwinding. Right. Cause it's like. It's a learned behavior. This was your normal growing.

[A]

You didn't know that it was inappropriate.

[B]

It's always fascinating as you get older and you meet your friends, families, or you talk to your friends, or especially when you're dating or in a relationship, and you learn how different families can be. Yes. And you also learn, like, whoa, I grew up thinking this was normal.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And it's not at all.

[C]

I also think he failed her. Not going after her in that moment of just, like, when she's like, have a good dinner. I would have had that moment of, like, maybe pause and be like, hey, guys, I'm so sorry. I'm gonna check on her real quick.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And then, like, hop out to the parking lot and be like, hey, what's going on? Can we talk? As opposed to, like, 30 minutes later, he's texting me. Like, think about Matt. He literally just saw that happen and went crazy. Anyway, I'll do the duck all around.

[A]

Okay. And wait and speaking of the text too, we need to talk about the mom's text of sorry that you're sensitive.

[B]

Fuck her. She fucking sucks.

[A]

He's okay. I don't know if I would block report or call the police.

[B]

Report now. Here's also the issue is like, if we want to take this a deeper level.

[A]

We do.

[B]

Imagine if Matt was apologetic and he is cool, but he's like, but this is my mom and I still love her, but I hear you. It's like, that is your mother in law. That is your potential mother in law. Can you handle that? And I think it's fair for people to go, I love my boyfriend, but my God, if his family treats me this way and this like, can I handle that? It's like, I don't. I would understand if someone's like, I can't. I can't do it. This episode of Reddit Stories is sponsored by Doordash. So I wasn't feeling great the other day. I came down with the cold or flu, who knows? But I was horizontal for the majority of the day. I definitely wasn't drinking enough fluids. And then there at my door was a doordash delivery from Trevor with all the essentials to make me feel better. Cough drops, electrolytes, tissues, and soup. Pretty sure it was the best chicken noodle soup I've ever had. I was feeling awful that day, but with Doordash and Trevor, I was feeling so much better. Doordash makes showing up for the people you love easy. Got you delivered. Doordash. Order now. Okay, so the verdict. There's no official verdict, but what it's clear for, because the subreddit. Oh, because the OG subreddit was deleted. This subreddit no longer exists.

[A]

The mom found it. Yeah, she was like, could you just scooch the trash?

[B]

But the comments are leaning towards not the asshole, so which seems fair. Comments, not the asshole. Have you ever talked to your boyfriend about his mother's behavior? If not, then he may see this pettiness on her part as a one off. However, that doesn't fully excuse his reaction. Don't apologize to anyone. If you want to keep seeing your boyfriend, then talk to him about his mother. If he's receptive at all, then it might be worth working things out. If he refuses to hear or accept anything about his mother's behavior, then you might reconsider this relationship. Yeah, someone said, sorry you were so sensitive. Says it all, at least to me. She didn't acknowledge doing anything wrong. It's too bad that your boyfriend Isn't looking out for you in this op Said. Yeah, it's actually crazy. He still hasn't spoken to me, and it's been like, two days. What, you're broken up?

[C]

Bye.

[B]

Yeah, so I'm going to just drop his things off at his house and that's the end of this relationship. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, that's tough. But at least he made the decision easier. Yeah, like you said, it would be hard to. You know, you're really into the relationship, but this other factor is, like, limiting the future. It's. This is clear.

[A]

And can you tell her to, like, drop his ass? Like, just, you know, for, like, reference. Yeah, you know, for us.

[B]

Just so we know.

[A]

You know, just so we know where he lives.

[B]

Lastly, someone said, how could anyone laugh at that his mother was so damn disrespectful? If I was Matt, I would have blurted out, what the fuck? Because someone said, discomfort is why the family laughed. Matt, the motherfucker will be the topic of family gossip for years after that dinner.

[A]

Unfortunate wording, but, yes, I think that was intentional.

[B]

Yeah, I think there's something loosely that's hinted at that I do think is very true about relationships. And I've heard it said before, is like, a relationship is not tested. Like, a strong relationship is not about if things happen. Like, if arguments or tiffs or things happen. It's how you come back together 100%. And Matt has not spoken to her in two days. So it's like, oh, so you don't come back together. So that is how you guys handle that. And that's more than anything. It is what happened after.

[A]

Cause arguments are inevitable. You will always have some sort of conflict. Yeah, it's going to happen.

[C]

It's safe to do so.

[A]

Absolutely. But it's certainly how you handle it, how you're communicating, how you're dealing with the other person and advocating for them, rather than just being like, I'm right. And clearly he's showing that he's terrible with problem solving.

[B]

Absolutely. Update. It's a small one, but it's an update the next day.

[A]

At least a zip code.

[B]

So this is the next day. So this will have been the third day that they have not spoken to each other. I dropped his stuff off and he tried to have a talk with me, and he was basically saying, like, oh, his mom didn't mean any harm with the joke and telling me to chill out and that I'm being dramatic. I told him to go date his mom since she is perfect and y' all understand each other's. Humor. Woo.

[A]

Yes, queen. Why don't you go date your mom? I'm taking that. I'm gonna say it in contexts that make no sense. Why don't you just go date your mom, bro?

[C]

I think that's gonna be a for a lot of conversations. They're like, oh, ew.

[A]

What? They'll be like, this is clear cut.

[C]

Okay. Yeah.

[B]

Damn. Oh my God, Arasha from Smosh. I'm such a huge fan.

[A]

Go date your mom, fucker.

[B]

The fuck? Okay, I guess so someone commented underneath the update saying, imagine having to explain to your next partner how your previous relationship ended. She got upset when my mom forced her out of her seat at my birthday party and then laughed at her.

[C]

He's not gonna ever say that. He's gonna say, she couldn't take jokes and she was so serious and my family just didn't like my family.

[A]

He's actually not gonna have another relationship because he's gonna be single and dead. I'm gonna kill him.

[C]

And dating his mom is a zombie. Yeah.

[A]

Ew.

[C]

This is a shitty lifetime movie coming

[B]

to CW for like three episodes.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Zombie boy dating his own mom. This next story comes from relationship advice. It was. This was posted like two days ago.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

As of recording, this was posted like two days ago.

[A]

Okay. Happy pride.

[C]

Happy birthday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Happy birthday, Matt.

[B]

My girlfriend, who's 18, is going to prom with another guy while I, 19 year old boy, am stuck in the hospital. Well, I'm stuck in the hospital and I don't know how to handle it. So again, my girlfriend is going to prom with another guy while I'm stuck in the hospital and I don't know how to handle it. Ooh. Okay, so this is an 18 and 19 year old. This is probably one of the youngest stories you could possibly read on Reddit stories.

[C]

This is one of those where I'm like, a lot of the advice is gonna be like, you're young. So I'm just getting that out of the way.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm trying to put myself back. I didn't go to prom.

[C]

Same.

[B]

And I'm also 34, so I have to really. I'm really outside perspective here.

[A]

That's okay, you guys, I got you.

[B]

Thanks, Arasha.

[A]

I got you.

[B]

I'm really struggling right now. I don't know how to talk to my friends about this. And I could really use some outside perspective.

[A]

You guys got me.

[B]

A few weeks ago, I sold my gaming PC for $900 so I could buy a plane ticket and fly out to attend my girlfriend's prom. I was genuinely excited about it and seeing her. Then I got seriously injured and ended up in the hospital. I suffered a traumatic brain injury from a lacrosse game. Doctors won't let me fly until the swelling in my brain goes down. Her prom is this week, so there's basically no chance I'll make it. My girlfriend still wants to go to prom, which I completely understand. It's her senior prom and I want her to have an amazing night. I don't want to ruin that experience for her. The problem is that she's now going with another guy. She's taking this guy to everything. Pre prom stuff, dinner, the dance, after prom stuff, and the after party. He'll basically be there for the entire night. I trust her and I don't think she's cheating on me. But the thought of waking up in a hospital bed and opening my phone to see prom pictures of my girlfriend dressed up with another guy is genuinely killing me. I've never cried over something she's done before, but I've been in tears over this. I feel guilty because I know it's not her fault and I don't want to make her feel bad about enjoying her prom. At the same time, I feel hurt and jealous. Adding to all of this, I'm out of nearly $1,000 and I no longer have my gaming PC. I'm stuck in the hospital and the thing I was excited for is happening without me. Am I being unreasonable for feeling this upset? How would you handle this situation without making your partner feel guilty for something that isn't really their fault?

[A]

You sweet boy.

[B]

This is the Most level headed 19 year old who has a concussion

[C]

and no games.

[B]

What if he was an absolute asshole and then he got a concussion? Now he's like, you know, I really see.

[A]

I pulls it out of the space. I'm hurt, I'm jealous. I don't want her to feel that

[B]

way, but I feel the empathy for her. And I'm new to empathy. Cause Natasha gave it to me.

[A]

I literally just started it.

[C]

I can speak Spanish now.

[B]

I don't know what's going on.

[A]

Episode of House okay, okay, okay. This is. This is sad.

[B]

This is really rough.

[A]

It's upsetting.

[C]

Multiple reasons.

[B]

Okay. I'm trying to put myself in the shoes if I am like this guy's older brother or like a friend of his or something. Right?

[A]

Cute.

[B]

And I think what's tough is I'm like, okay, you got a long distance. A long distance high school relationship.

[A]

Good on them.

[B]

Damn yeah, like, long distance relationships in general.

[A]

Tough, Very difficult.

[C]

When I was 19, I had to make the call of. I had, like, just started college. My girlfriend at the time was graduating college. She was moving back to another state, and I had to make the call of, like, I can't do long distance at 19. When are we gonna be back together? So, like, choosing to do it is hard.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

Absolutely. Look, I didn't have a girlfriend throughout all my teen years.

[A]

Same.

[B]

Several of my twenties. But. But I do think my advice to someone would be, like, if you're moving from high school or you're in high school or you're in college and you have long distance, unless there's like a concrete plan of, like, we're gonna come, here's our timeline. When we get back together, I do think it's like, you guys should break up. Like, it's okay. Like, it does come back to, like, you're young. It's like, you're so brand new to relationships and also, like, you don't know where your life is going. It's important to give yourself that freedom. I think it's like, to him in this situation, I'd be like, this is really hard. And maybe it's a sign that, like, I don't know, this is tough. But also he is right to be upset.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

In general. Oh.

[A]

Oh, yeah. For sure.

[C]

Bringing it more to, like, the accessible situation for anyone, regardless of age, you know, having jealousy of any kind when you feel that you're really not supposed to, but you still feel that, that's a hard feeling. And it's tough. It's scary to bring it up too, when you're like, well, there's no fix. It's not her fault. Like, all these things. But, you know, one of the most important things to learn in a relationship, and I hope that both people can learn it early, is it has to be safe to have conflict. It has to be safe to bring something up, even if it's frustrating, even if it leads to, like, an argument or a misunderstanding. It has to be okay for you to do that. You can't be afraid of that. And so, you know, there could have been a world where he was included a lot more in this, where it's like, you know, this is Kyle. I'm taking him to the prom now. You know, he's a close friend of mine. But, you know, we're going to do this little thing where, like, on his boutonniere we have, like a printout of your face. We're gonna, like, facetime you for the first dance and, like, have it at eye level or something like that. Like, there could be some goofy, like, this is surrogate, you know, op for the night.

[A]

Sure, sure. Yeah, I think I was also, my mind went straight to the fact that, like, I don't know. I guess I totally understand that prom is. Is important for her and obviously something that she's excited for. So I don't fault her for still wanting to do that. But I have to also consider the fact that, like, if my boyfriend was in a traumatic brain, had a traumatic brain injury, that I would want to go there. I don't know that I would be like, well, I want to party, so I'm going to do that. I feel as though, especially because the dynamic is that he's selling his gaming PC so as to come see her.

[C]

That's also a whole dedicated job.

[A]

I don't know. I feel like if my boyfriend was doing something like that, I would also wanna be like, well, hold on. He was about to do this huge gesture for me. I need to go be by his side while he's going through this. So I don't think that it's intentional, but it unfortunately reads a little bit selfish to me.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't see that. I am upset that he is in a hospital bed by himself when his girlfriend is with another guy. I love the idea of involving him more in some type of way because again, I think it's a completely okay decision to still go to prom.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But I just also feel as though she's putting more of her devotion to the event and to the party. And for him, it seems like it was just really important because it was important to her.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So maybe people's priorities are just a little mismatched.

[B]

It's true. Cause, I mean, he's 19, so I guess he's already had his.

[C]

He's a year more mature.

[B]

Yeah, he's a year more mature.

[A]

He's a grown man.

[B]

But, yeah, it does seem like. And that's kind of the issue with, like, their age of long distance. Like, you're living both separate lives. Like, you're not like, I don't know. That's. I do agree with you. It is kind of like, if I was his friend, I'd be like, hey, maybe she's like, this is her priorities. And that's not necessarily wrong. But it's like. But it's important for you to go. Like, maybe I should think about this. But I don't know. It's tough.

[C]

I also think, like, you know, there's something about, like, assuming Op is only interested in women and his girlfriend is only interested in men. There's something about having a guy take your place where you're like, I was gonna wear a suit like that. Like, that could have been me, you know? I don't know. It's a tough thing to feel specifically. Not like, my girlfriend's still going with some friends, as opposed to that guy is taking my place.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I'd be twisted up by that.

[A]

Date like that again. It's.

[C]

It is a date. Yeah.

[A]

Well, yeah. And it's like, she clearly wanted this prom experience a certain way. She wanted a date, seemingly a guy to, like, take her and do all of these, like, things. The dinner and the pre and the whatever and stuff like that. So for her, it wasn't like, it has to be my boyfriend. It's really just like, well, as long as there's a guy there, I get my prom experience, and that's fine. Cause that's what she wants to speak to. Like, the feelings and, like, the long distance of it all. And being in high school, what I feel like I can offer there, too, is I know when you are that age, it feels so heavy and wrong, right?

[B]

So intense.

[A]

You're like. Cause even just with friends, you're like, these are my. Like, these are the buddies I'm gonna have for life.

[C]

This is my life forever.

[A]

And, oh, my first girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever, like, actually hit the jackpot

[B]

right off the bat.

[C]

Found them.

[A]

It feels like a world.

[B]

I mean, like, I think when you're 19, you can't fathom past 30, right? So you're like, this is my life forever. It's like, you have no idea how long life is.

[A]

Exactly. So I think that there's validity, too, in, you know, doing what you can to make it work and, you know, being willing to sacrifice a lot of different things in order for your timeline to work out. So it's a little bit easier for us to comprehend from afar and be like, maybe. Maybe don't do long distance. And it's like, no, actually go through that. Learn how hard it is. So then in the future, you'll be able to discern how large your mile radius should be on hinge.

[B]

No, that's, I think, extremely valuable advice. Like, you're living your life, and maybe you have to go through this, you know? Cause I. I went through so many hurtful things with relationships, and it's like, I look back and I'm like, I think maybe I needed to.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, it's like I could have could if I could go back in time and say, don't do this. It's like, would I become who I like? Would I end up where I'm at? It's like, maybe you have to deal with it.

[A]

I think so.

[B]

And his values are great, right? His commitment and stuff. It's like, no, those are valuable things. I'm not saying to not be that way. It's just. But it is also tough. Like the context. You don't have that context at that age. So it's like you don't want to also lose those values in the process,

[C]

assuming they're gonna be together. And this is what he wants. The only advice I would really give is like, you have to be able to voice it if a relationship is okay for you. And who knows? This could be your forever. You don't have the context. Go for it. Live your life, learn. But you have to be able to bring it up also. I would be remiss if I didn't gaming PC. Cause you're in my world a little bit now too. First of all, that's not just an item. That's like your hobby. That is a connection with friends. If you're playing things online, there's a lot to that. And $900.

[B]

I feel really bad that his family, like, you know, his family has to know that he sold his gaming PC in order to get a ticket to go see his girlfriend and then suffered a traumatic brain injury and is by himself in the hall playing lacrosse. Like, he seems like such an upstanding person. I'm like, I know, I love it, man. And he's like, I'm not getting that money back. I'm like, damn, I feel so bad for this guy.

[C]

But also, I can't fathom a build that he would have unless it's like multiple, multiple years old. That's worth. If It's a gaming PC, like a desktop, only $900 to sell. I feel like he got fleeced well.

[A]

And not even to mention the medical bills that he's now gonna have to deal with as well. Like all of these.

[B]

Like, it's a lot. This guy, this guy got hit. This is the beginning of one of those coming of age movies.

[A]

Yeah, he's gonna have an awesome life.

[B]

Truly.

[C]

It could have been an 80s romance teen movie. Or like, let's have our own hospital prom. And then like da da da with the you and I kind of like background music.

[B]

His arch nemesis on Fortnite is like, where is he?

[C]

He didn't show up to Dead Man's words to win the girl and it's the guy she's on the date with.

[A]

Oh, he bought the PC.

[B]

Okay, comments. Someone said, well contact the airline ASAP to see if you can get a refund given you are in the hospital. Sometimes they make exceptions for those cases. Someone said, dude, you just had a brain injury. You can't be stressed. You need to just let this one go and put yourself first, heal, rest up. There are endless amounts of girls in the world. Your health is the priority. OP said, definitely just really bummed about this outcome. Just a total loss. Someone said, that is really rough. Brotato Chip. Do not give this girl any more of your time or money. And OP responded saying, you're a fucking loser.

[C]

Just kidding.

[B]

I'm kidding.

[A]

Sorry, that's the concussion cocking part.

[B]

Aw. OP responded saying, can't even play the new 007 now.

[C]

No.

[B]

Aw.

[C]

Somebody can we find this man?

[A]

Can we send him a gaming PC? Gaming PC brands Please send this man a free PC update.

[B]

Okay, let's see if we get some good news for this guy.

[A]

Please go to Russia and to Marvel, please.

[B]

Unfortunately, I wasn't eligible for a refund from Air Canada since I missed the flight Canada tag.

[A]

Air Canada?

[C]

No. That's great. Cause he's in the hospital in Canada. They'll give you money for that.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

That's right. Free health care.

[B]

So that's good news that he lives in Canada.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

They replaced your blood with maple syrup.

[B]

I wasn't eligible for a refund from Air Canada since I missed the flight and didn't have travel insurance. It sucks, but there's not much I can do about it now. If I recover somewhat, I'm going to try to get a summer job. If my doctors clear me for work, hopefully I can save up enough money to buy a rog ally so I can at least get back to gaming.

[C]

Republic of Gaming, Asus Brand.

[A]

Is it a good one?

[C]

It can be.

[B]

Okay. So at least I can get back to gaming and have some sense of familiarity from all of this. Still a pretty rough situation, but I'm trying to focus on recovering first and figuring everything else out later. I wish we had more context about their relationship, but you know, it is what it is.

[A]

My king.

[B]

Really hard.

[C]

The fact that he's not talking immediately about like, you know, I'm gonna go see her in the different time. Like he's just talking about getting a job, healing up. So it seems like he.

[B]

I wonder if more happened.

[C]

Yeah, maybe I'd be curious.

[B]

Yeah, it's tough. I think it's one of those things though. He's like, it's a total loss. And I'm like, it's kind of though, one of those things where you look back five years later and you go, oh, that was such a growing moment

[A]

for me, for sure.

[B]

In ways that you kind. I kind of can't comprehend in the moment, but he's got a bright future. Yeah. This will. Internally, it can make him so much more.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't know. It's so interesting how that works, but.

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

Yeah. Tough.

[A]

Really tough.

[B]

Really tough. I feel really bad for the dude. This episode of Reddit Stories is sponsored by zocdoc. Some relationships we read about on Reddit Stories can be terrible, but your relationship with your doctor doesn't have to be. That's why I use zocdoc. Zocdoc lets you search and compare local in network doctors through their app or on your browser. I can see actual appointment openings and book them immediately. With Zocdoc, I can see where this relationship is going. With patient reviews, I know exactly what I am getting when I walk into a doctor's office. Don't you wish dating apps had this feature? With Zocdoc, I can find the perfect doctor for me across 200 plus specialties from dentist to primary care. Zocdoc has you covered. Covered. Don't forget that you can filter out by location, doctors that are in your network, and so much more. The app is incredibly simple. I had been pushing off doctor's appointments forever until I downloaded the app and then I had all my appointments set immediately. Your health matters and taking care of yourself shouldn't be complicated. Find and book the right doctor with ZocDoc. Head to ZocDoc.com PittReddit to get started and check that appointment off your to do list. That's Zocdoc.com PitReddit back to the show. Okay, our next story comes from the subreddit. Board games.

[A]

Oh, games you play when you're bored.

[C]

Honestly, when you said that, that was my first thought.

[B]

Yeah, I knew my girlfriend just broke up with me over a board game and I'm not even joking. Ooh, I do wonder how often board games make people break up.

[A]

Oh, some people are very competitive.

[C]

This could go either way.

[A]

This is not clear cut. Nope.

[B]

We were playing catan.

[C]

I knew it.

[B]

Sorry, I was gonna say you knew it was gonna be catan.

[C]

I was gonna say catan.

[B]

Yep, we were Playing Catan last night with another couple. She had the longest road. I had an ore port she desperately needed. She offers me a deal. I decline because it helps her more than me. She got silent, scary silent after our friends left. She goes, you know what your problem is? You care more about winning a fucking board game than making me happy. I laughed because I thought she was joking. She packed a bag and went to her sister's. Texted me this morning that she needs space to think about our relationship over Catan. Am I insane or is she massively overreacting? We've been together three years and she's ending it over a trade in. Catan genuinely don't know if this is actually about the board game or something deeper, but either way, what the fuck just happened, right? I mean, it's gotta be something, right?

[A]

Right.

[B]

It's gotta be.

[A]

I mean, maybe like it's layered in that way of like, it's similar circumstances. Like what she said gives us so much.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, your focus is this. Rather than making me happy or over making me happy.

[C]

It also wasn't a one off of like, I didn't like the way you did that during that game. It was. Do you know what your problem is? Which is that there's a lot under that.

[A]

100%.

[B]

Yes. That's my inclination.

[C]

It was the catalyst. It was the catalyst.

[A]

It had to be. It had to be. Again, some people are incredibly competitive and they do get very fired up when it comes to stuff like that. Because we all know that feeling too. When you're in a game and sometimes, yeah, you're on top and you need somebody else to help you win in that way, whether it's by trade or you don't want them to steal your star or something in Mario Party or something like that. And it's a move like that. If you are really, like invested in this game and you're following through on that plan and then somebody changes it, sometimes it can get a little heated.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

To go so far as to end a three year relationship feels that's a lot.

[B]

A lot. And this was the next day. Like, the next day she was still mad.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It wasn't like just that night, it's like, okay, I cooled down. The next day she texted saying she needs space to think about their relationship.

[C]

It's bigger.

[B]

And he says, it's over. Catan. She's not saying that. She's. Yeah, it sounds like there's a lot going on. This was just the final thing.

[A]

Yeah. That triggered that same feeling.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So that context too. Cause if he's just like, yeah, it's over a board game, like, there could be so many things he's missing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Or not. Maybe it is over a board game. People do get heated, but for context, for anyone who doesn't know Catan out there, the game is about, like, you gotta acquire resources and you get points at the end based on whether you have the longest road or the most cities. But there's a chance aspect of like rolling a dice to see where you can or rolling a die to see where you can put things down. So sometimes you need something because you just didn't get to settle anywhere near sheep. And someone has all the sheep. And the game is about trading and giving them an offer they can't refuse. And if they do refuse and you're stuck cause you don't have sheep, that's the whole point of the game. You don't get to win. And that's how it goes.

[A]

Yeah, I think that's a really great point in that. Because he's the one who's reporting this. He's writing it out. He is kind of also saying it just in context of the game. Whereas if she were to write it out, I'm sure she would be like, and this one time he did this, and the second time this. And then when we were playing Catan, this happened. And it made me feel like all of this happened. He's kind of, I think, just maybe blindsided because he isn't realizing the other

[B]

times he's not being self aware and he's not even trying to understand. It doesn't sound like he's trying to understand what else could be going on here. He's not like, okay, so his reaction is like, over a board game that's going like, hey, let's talk. What are you feeling? What's going on? Let's unpack this. Let's unpack this board game.

[A]

That also makes me think, though, in previous situations, maybe it was also her responsibility though, to bring that conflict up and be like, hey, I have a problem beforehand. Maybe again, we don't have this context, but it might not be that he's not self aware, but he literally has never heard anything from her. And this is the first time that she said, you know what your problem is? And he's like, whoa. Well, the only time you're bringing this up is when we play this game. So. So it has to do with this game.

[C]

Sure. I also think he would have, you know, if this is a world where, you know, he's trying to say things in his favor and leaving out a lot of things, either knowingly or unknowingly. He would have probably said something to the effect of like, yeah, my girlfriend gets really competitive. She often does.

[A]

And he's not mentioning any kind of pattern.

[C]

But again, if it is truly just this for me. I love games. I love board games, card games. I play magic, things like that. There is. It is an awful feeling when you know that playing the game to the best of your ability, being like, oh, I've got a great move, I got a great card to play, is going to upset someone and there is therefore a cost to it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It makes it hard. It makes it really difficult.

[A]

Totally.

[C]

Video games too. Like, if someone's gonna be like, fuck, like, you did the.

[B]

Ah.

[A]

Ah.

[C]

You guys won this round. It's like, oh, okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know,

[B]

to this day, I still laugh at it, but I was one time invited to a board game day with some friends, right? And most of the people I didn't know that well, but it was one of my friends, two people I knew pretty well. And then, like, my friend's roommate was there and, like a bunch of other people were playing this big, intense, like, catan, like, game. But even more intense than catan. Like, it was like a five to six hour game.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

And there came a part later on in the game where I had a move that I could make that I was like, this is kind of my only move. But by doing it, I was gonna eliminate someone. Now, mind you, the point of board games is to play to win, beat other people. Yeah. It's not like, oh, we all won Scrabble this time. It's like, you kind of have to do a move. So I was like, okay, I'm gonna do this. And it was gonna screw over my friend's roommate completely. And so I do it. Cause I'm like, yeah. Like, I'm like, ha ha. Like, whatever. Like, all right, cool. And he luckily wasn't mad at me. He was for some reason mad at my roommate. Cause my roommate was kind of like, sort of helping me at the time. Like, I was asking his advice, whatever. And I'm not kidding. He truly left the room. He left the apartment. He's like, no, it's fine, it's fine. He truly, like, as he was leaving, he's like saying to my friend, he's like, he's like, we'll talk about this later. Like, whatever. And, like, left.

[C]

Oh, shit.

[B]

And I was like, oh, my God.

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

I was like, Whoa. And it was definitely like a this kind of happened vibe. And I was like, that's embarrassing as fuck. And watching it happen, I was like, I. Cause I am competitive. I've said it, like, on board af, like, when we play games, I'm competitive, but I leave it. You leave it on the field. You finish the game and you go,

[C]

yes, I love playing games with you because, like, it's good to be chill, but at the same time, if everybody's like, oh, well, I don't care. I'm like, why are you playing?

[B]

That makes me more mad.

[C]

It's worse.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[C]

You have to care and be like, I'm doing my best here. And then, ah, I didn't get to win. And that you didn't get to.

[B]

And that's okay.

[A]

Listen, I've also. I've been in that position too, where, like, you know, I was on a family trip a couple years ago and I was playing Mario Party with my brother and my cousins. And, like, listen, I was way ahead, right? And my brother, like, he starts telling our cousins, he's like, guys, we have to team up against Arasha, like, out loud in the room. And so they all, like, you know, steal the stars and whatever. And I was like, and why'd you do that? And like, actually, why'd you do that? And I, like, got upset. Sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No, you're right. I shouldn't have teamed up against you. And I was. And it literally, it lasted about two minutes. And then all of a sudden I was like, I can't believe I'm doing this. This is Mario Party. This is a video game. And I'm actually, like, pissed off at you guys. And we had a huge laugh about it because I had gotten so worked up. But then I all of a sudden was like, wait, nothing matters. It's a video game. Like, the competition aspect, it's so valid. But this idea of leaving it at the table or like, like stepping outside of that for a second, zooming out and being like, wait, no one's winning anything. There's no money on the table. Like, I mean, I guess sometimes there is, and sometimes in the context of bets and stuff, it's a bigger stake at the end. But this just sounds like endless fun.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, there's no reason to get so riled up.

[C]

I think I do get a little tilted when there is that vibe of, like, team up against them. Like, I play a lot of the gathering. And that's. That's fine because when you play in a four person group, someone's gonna be the threat. Someone's gonna call it out and be like, they're the threat. And then everybody sort of goes in for a minute. But, like, I don't know. There was a smosh games video a long time ago where, like, we were playing Smash Bros. And if you didn't win, you had to drink a gross smoothie. And I'm. I love Smash Bros. It's one game that I think I'm, you know, I'm not competitive, like, level at, but I'm pretty good with the average person. And I was like, okay, great. I'm not gonna have to drink the thing. And, like, almost immediately, they were like, damian's a threat. Team up. And it was my first time playing it on the channel too, like, publicly.

[B]

Don't let him play. That's what it kinda feels like.

[C]

Don't let him play. Like, everyone stomp on a rash's character. Like, that part sucks. That could be something like, hey, I didn't appreciate that you did that in our group game night. Like, that kind of sucked. I didn't get to play as opposed to I didn't get to.

[A]

Right, right, right. It's tricky, but now that we're even talking about it, I'm kind of like, yeah, games can get a little tense,

[B]

but we also have the layer of, like, oh, we're trying to make a video together. So, like, there is also where I get most frustrated when we're playing board games or video games is when I'm like, shit, this moment is boring. Because an epic thing didn't get to, like, we're trying to make something exciting, and I'm like, aw, Because I lost. There's no, like, there's no. What's the climax of this video?

[C]

I don't care if I want to keep playing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

But if I'm playing, like, outside of work, it's such a different vibe. I play board games so differently, so much more enjoyable. I'm definitely more, like, locked in, but I'm like, I'm just having fun.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But once again, I'm like, once we put the board game away, I'm never mad after.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

So the comments on this, whatever the catalyst, it's usually because they were other issues that just kept growing until they bubbled over. The spark could have been anything someone said. Lmao. Said so many men ever. A famous quote. It's never about the dishes. It was never about the game. It sounds like to her, you often chose yourself or what you wanted over doing things she wanted Ways she felt loved or ways she wanted to be appreciated. It doesn't matter if it was intentional or not. It's how she interpreted the situations and how she felt she was treated. Lastly, someone says, I think you mistakenly posted your relationships question in a board games forum. Someone replied to that saying, and for some reason got better advice than he would have in most relationships related for us. Yeah, sure, man. The last thing I'll say, though, is I've played catan a few times, and unfortunately, the groups I played it with have been people who've played plenty of catan. And, man, it makes me think of, like, when I read about ancient history of, like, oh, you were that nation. That's just like, well, I guess we're just gonna. We're fighting for the love of the game, but, boy, things are not looking good.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

Have you guys seen the Mongol army over there? We're not. Not. We'll just. We'll fight the good fight, I guess. Like, I'm just like, fuck, no, I

[C]

can't hear them over the rumbling. They are the rumbling.

[B]

Oh, got it.

[C]

Oh, shit.

[B]

Yeah. No, like, truly, every time I play catan, I, my I. I lose in the initial where you put. Where you're on the board. I'm like, holy shit. Like, okay.

[A]

Yeah. It relies so much on, like, other people working with you. And when they do that thing of, like, they're winning, like, you know, team up against them, nobody trade with them, then it's like, okay, well, you guys aren't giving me a good chance. And then again, real feelings start to come out and it's like, all right, why am I crying to my cousin right now?

[B]

Yeah. It is interesting, though. Think of the teaming up against people. What I think has happened in every game of catan I've played is the person that everyone goes, oh, team up against that person, they never win. But it's because you should be thinking ahead of, like, well, this other person's gonna win. I feel like that's.

[C]

It's Petyr Baelish. Like, chaos is a ladder, but actually it's that little platform at the airport where it makes you walk a little bit faster, but not faster than the dude who's got really long legs next to you.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, like, they need to think about that. Like, that's like ancient history that I read about where they're like, guys, Alexander the Great, we're all teaming up to fight Persia. It's like, should we be worried about this guy, though?

[A]

Like, no, keep your eyes open.

[C]

Anyways, Octavius is fine.

[B]

Yeah, no, it's all good. Damian and our roommate and I were playing Mario Party back then. We played on our N64 and boy, I don't know what was going on. My luck was horrible and there was a moment where I finally got stars. In all the times we played, I just never even had one. And I finally had two. And then a chance time happened and I lost both. And what actually, it was too funny. But what made me actually upset is Damian and our roommate both looked at me with genuine pity. It was competitive. If they looked at me, they were like, hey, I'm real sorry bud. And I was like, don't do that.

[A]

No, literally, literally.

[C]

Cause you make fun of each other throughout. Shane would be forced spaces from a bowser and he'd be rolling. I'd be like, hey Shane, don't roll a four. And then he'd like roll a four.

[B]

And I'd be like, oh, oops.

[C]

And then he loses all his stars and he's just like, hey, I'm real sorry.

[B]

I remember you turning to me like, hey, I'm real sorry about that.

[A]

And you're like, no, don't apologize. Throw it in my face. That would be easier.

[B]

Maybe die. We gotta move on. Next story. Our next story comes from True. Off my chest. Best friend doesn't know his proposal speech is actually about me.

[C]

What's up?

[B]

Hi Reddit. I just really need to air this out somewhere because I have nowhere else I can go with this. I, a 30 year old woman, my best friend, a 30 year old man, and his longtime girlfriend, a 26 year old woman, all teach in a school setting. I'm gonna be vague because I'm terrified of this getting back to either of them. I got my best friend Jim the job and he met Mia pretty soon after and they've been happily dating for seven years now. About me and Jim. We met in university and have always been super close. Jim is a bit of an airhead, but genuinely so emotionally mature and kind. I never minded it and I was always the one that had everything in order. I would book trips, he would happily tag along, that sort of thing. There are a lot of other things that are just part of our dynamic that I do without even thinking about. One thing that I started doing right after the pandemic is making sure Jim had something to drink in the morning. He wasn't late to his classes necessarily, but he would always hurry in and not have any time to get settled, fill up his water bottle, et cetera, before his classes start. Meanwhile, I love being one of the first people in the building, so I have all the time in the world to fill his water bottle, power up the ancient work computer, and sometimes I get him a coffee or a tea if I think he may need. Another thing I do is collect pictures and memes of Jim. The memes I usually make myself during school trips and things like that. I always analyze the pictures for a good reaction meme or a funny face he makes. These I exclusively use with him or Mia, who I am also a good friend and close colleague with. I also additionally smuggle information about him to his mother and Mia for presents, surprises and those kinds of things. And I always guard the area when Mia and Jim want some alone time during school trips. Now, Jim told me recently that he's going to propose to Mia and I was so excited I went over to his house to proofread the speech he had prepared and my jaw dropped on the floor. I won't upload it here, it's in our native language anyway. And also personal to him. But every single example he gave about what he loves about Mia is actually about me. In the speech he talks about how he started falling for her when she started leaving him warm drinks in winter and filling up his water bottles in summer. How she made so many candid pictures and memes of him and gathered them in a big book for his 30th birthday. She did make the book, but all the pictures were supplied by me. He even mentioned some specific memes that he thinks they are proof that they have the exact same humor. He talks about how she always knows what he is thinking or what he wants and names specific examples of times where I vividly remember having a call with Mia to tell her what is going on in his mind. Now I don't think he doesn't love Mia, nor do I think Mia took credit for any of this on purpose, but I found it so unsettling how the entire speech seemed to be more a description of my behavior and my acts of love towards him than to Mia. And of course she would notice that too. I tried to get him to change major aspects of it but didn't dare straight up telling him everything in the speech was me. He sent me the new version of the speech today and I cannot stop reading it and thinking, oh, this situation was me and this was me. Oh and this was also me. This is not about credit. I don't want it. I don't need to stand on a soapbox and yell that I love him. Better, because I simply don't think that way, nor am I asking for advice. I just needed to scream it somewhere and will now hopefully never need to speak of it again. Thank you for reading.

[C]

What a roller coaster.

[A]

Let's start here. Who's named Jim anymore?

[B]

Well, that's her fake name, right?

[C]

The office owns that.

[B]

Uh, okay, so my initial reaction, he's like, hey, can you proofread this? He's totally wanting her to read it. Like, you think? Yeah. Why? Why? That's the. That's what he's doing. It's. It's. It's. This is. He's seven. He's seven years into a. This is maybe me. Just, like romantic movies have rotted my brain to where I'm like, oh, no. This is. He's seven years into a relationship, but before he commits to that fully, he needs to confess his love.

[A]

Holy shit.

[B]

He's trying to do it subtly by being like, here's my proposal. And then it's like he's actually proposing to her.

[A]

But why?

[B]

I know that's crazy. I'm just saying, like, that's.

[A]

Why be dating Mia when clearly there's this other person who's loving and caring for you. Why not shoot your shot earlier?

[C]

It could be a situation. I mean, going down that rabbit hole, it could be a situation of, like, oh, well, we're just best friends, but Mia and I are, like, in a relationship. And when I think about forever, you know, I could be with Mia and, you know, my best friend will be there too, and I can't be without her. I sort of took this as, like, initially when she's like, you know, I learned all these things about him and made all these memes. I was like, oh, girl, you're either in love with him or it's a very uncomfortable. Like, you're kind of squeezing in on their situation. And when it was like, yeah, this proposal's about me, I was like, okay, sure, let's hear it. But if it's literally about the shit that she did that Mia has never specifically taken credit for, like, that's. That's wild. Let's say, for instance, though, taking this at face value, he made a mistake, and Mia's worried about, like, hurting his feelings or coming across weird, she. Or not, Mia op. Op. Needs to tell him, because assuming everything's above board and the people love who they say they love, he's about to make a crazy speech to someone who knows for a fact that they didn't do any of those things.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So if we're all on each other's side. And being truthful here, he's about to crash and bur with that proposal.

[B]

That's what makes me think. I'm like, is he really gonna propose with this? Cause, like, Mia's gonna be like, what?

[A]

Well, I mean, I guess she kind of did. Like, again, the book thing, like, it feels a little vague there. But then, like, the warming of the drinks, that definitely wasn't Mia. So it is a little confusing. I also got that initial idea, too, where, like, she read it and was like, oh, my God. Wait, guys. This is about me, right?

[B]

This is about me.

[C]

Like, beautiful eyes and beautiful hair. Like, that's gotta be him.

[A]

He's describing a woman that he likes. It must be me.

[B]

But she's talking about, like, no specific

[A]

instances, I would say. Then she does have to kind of spell it out, but not in the way that's like, do you love me?

[B]

No. No. If I'm her, I'm not doing that. I'm going, hey, you're saying, like, you love how she fills up your water bottles. Is that. Does she do that?

[A]

Are you still talking about Mia? Yeah, like, sort of. From, like, a.

[B]

It feels weird. Like, the. And specifically, there's a photo book where she's like. He's like, oh, I loved how you made that photo book of all those memes and you. And he's like, well, she's like, but I did fill the. I supplied all the photos, so.

[A]

Oh, I think you're right.

[B]

Use a better example. But it just. That's why I'm like, this is a crazy proposal. He's not. He can't be this stupid.

[C]

She called him an airhead. But, like, oh, true. But the thing is, like, if he's been with Mia for seven years and they all work at the same place, there's no way. There's no time. Where they spent the night together, drove in together the next morning, and then he finds a warm drink, like, knowing, like, and assuming that it's made by the person that he just spent the night and morning with and got to work at the same time. Like, he'd have to be a. He'd have to really.

[B]

He'd have to be the world's dumbest

[C]

man, the dumbest motherfucker in the world.

[A]

No, I think you're right, Shane. And I think if she were to approach it, even with a little bit of just, like, you know, wonder of, like, hey, I think I'm the one who did this. I feel like he would also maybe Give it up right away and be

[C]

like, maybe make it more specific about her.

[A]

Or like, oh, yeah, you're right. Like, I guess you did do that or something. Like, maybe more would be revealed if just like, follow up conversation was initiated.

[B]

We have comments. Someone said, he knows what he's doing.

[C]

Oof.

[B]

Someone said, you need to chill with your relationship with your friend. I understand you've always been close, but it sounds like you need to learn boundaries. They are building a life together. Back off. Comments like that are kind of accusing her of leading him on. He's in the relation. He can also set his fucking boundaries. He's in a relationship. And like,

[C]

it would be on both unless it's truly the most healthy, communicative. Two people are in a relationship and the third is the best friend that keeps guard when they need alone time on a school trip, which, what the fuck?

[B]

I know.

[C]

That'd be so weird and uncomfortable. There is something there where I don't know, the way she described. I go through his photos to find reactions and all these things.

[B]

I'm like, okay, yeah, that's true.

[A]

But I don't know if I would be like, hey, you need a background.

[C]

Not to that.

[A]

Right, Right. I guess it would just sort of be like, what is the understanding of everybody in the group? Because something like this has come up. It's clear that maybe stuff is a little blurry. How do people feel about each other objectively? Mia and Jim have been together for seven years, so it's like, out of respect for that relationship, I think. I also believe that it's up to one of them to communicate if what OP is doing is not okay. I think she's just being a really solid friend and, like, doing all the things. Like it is, of course, a little, like, relationship y. Yeah. But if Jim and Mia aren't complaining and aren't saying, like, you're overstepping, it's like, great. Then that just seems like a dynamic that everyone is on board for. Sure.

[C]

It can be. And that that's. It's entirely possible that that is a thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

My fear is that because we are hearing this from opinion and this situation is so unusual in my mind, or uncommon, unconventional. Unconventional. There's so much room for unreliable narrator

[B]

stuff where I'm like, what's I in general? And it gets me in trouble a lot. I tend to lean on distrusting op, you know, because I'm just like, hey, you're the one telling the story. So I kind of put the onus on you. You're Self reporting of, like, I kind of have to assume there's gaps that you're. When you're saying you're. Yeah. It's like, not always fair and I'm wrong so many times. But a lot of times also we get an update and it's like, oh, you're now giving us more information you didn't give us before. And it's filling things in.

[A]

Right, right.

[B]

But with this one, I'm taking it also at face value of, like, regardless of her behavior, his proposal is super inappropriate. Like, just like, not super inappropriate, but I'm just like, his proposal's weirding me out.

[C]

Well, he wrote about the wrong person.

[B]

He wrote like, yeah, what's going on?

[A]

That is weird.

[B]

What? What are you doing?

[C]

If it's literally specifically about things that she did and everybody's being truthful, you have to tell him, like, oops, you got this wrong.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Write specific things about Mia.

[B]

I'm just like, man, after seven years. Cause, you know when I proposed to Courtney, like, and just like in any letter I write her or whatever, it's like, yeah, you have plenty of moments to pull from that you distinctly remember.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You're not getting it. I'm not getting it. Confused Being like, oh, right, sorry, that was. No, that was Ian that did that.

[A]

Yeah, Right. Even if you're not. I mean, she described him as emotionally mature and kind and stuff like that. So maybe he is sort of like, using this as a move. Like, the comment said he knows what he's doing.

[B]

Yeah. Which I really don't like, which I fucking hate.

[A]

That's cheating of him being like, here. What do you think?

[B]

Yeah, like, that's emotional cheat. Like, that's. Yeah, he proposed to someone else. I'm like, fuck that.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Because.

[A]

Because, sorry. Sorry. I was just gonna say because if she isn't interested and she kind of is, like, no, change it, and whatever, and he gets the message. So he's gonna use Mia as the backup then.

[C]

Yeah, that's what it is. It's a last minute Hailman.

[B]

There are a lot of people. There are a lot of stories of people before they get married, confessing their love for someone else and then being

[A]

like, no, there's nothing there.

[B]

And then they go and they get married. I'm like, oh, my God, more comments. Someone said, why is it that everything he lists loving about her are all things being done for him? He doesn't know what love is if he thinks it's just things that he gets out of it. Does he actually list anything about her personality or anything. Like, he loves how happy she gets when insert thing. Or he loves the way she laughs. Or literally anything that doesn't have to do with her doing something for him. That's a fair criticism. That's all the context we have. Yeah, but edit, I now understand I would be horrible if I don't straight up tell him the things I did versus what Mia did. I'm going to call him with new feedback on his speech soon and we'll just casually go through the things he needs to change because I was doing them, and come with suggestions of all she does.

[C]

Please tell me there's an update.

[A]

There has to be. There has to be. There has to be. Don't do this. Don't do this.

[B]

There is an update. Yes. Pancakes.

[A]

Okay, okay, okay, okay. What do we think is happening?

[C]

I'm in gargoyle mode.

[B]

What do we think is happening?

[A]

So she's gonna deliver the feedback and she's gonna be like, hey, this is more about me than Mia.

[C]

Yeah, it's a coin flip. Either he's gonna be like, oh, I didn't realize that. I gotta do some thinking. Or to like, I know.

[A]

It's definitely gonna be. I know it's gotta be the phone.

[B]

Just like, I didn't think about that. And a fly goes in here and comes out here.

[A]

Ew.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Update. I've been crying for hours. Soon after reacting to some comments, I called Jim to tell him he needs to rewrite his speech because the things he mentioned were things I did. Those of you who said he knew were correct. He said he hoped laying it all out for me would make me realize I truly loved him all along. I guess the gay thing didn't really stick with him because I've been single for four years now. I hung up on him to call Mia before he could change the narrative on me. But Mia is a true trooper for saying she'll believe a sobbing woman over a man any day. We're going to meet up for lunch tomorrow, but I think we're both very done with Jim at this point. Thank you for the truth bombs and criticism. I don't think I'll update again.

[A]

I knew it. Jims do not exist.

[B]

So if I'm reading that correctly, OP is gay. So she's like, yeah, she's not assuming that at all, for obvious reasons. Man.

[A]

Jim, Jim, Jim, you fucking fool.

[C]

Yeah, clown behavior.

[A]

Well, now he lost both of these women. Yeah, that sucks.

[B]

It puts a lot of context, too. Like, Mia was not thinking anything of all. Like, we were talking about the behavior and everything. It's like Mia's not thinking. Cause she's like, yeah, she's gay. Like, I'm not worried about that. Like, right?

[A]

And Jim's like, I can change.

[B]

I can still change her.

[C]

Maybe she just hasn't met the right idiot.

[B]

Yeah, that'd be cool. Yeah, man.

[C]

God damn. Also shout out to me. There are too many stories that we hear where it's like, and now no one believes me and everything's mad for me. It'd be like, yup, I got a girl's girl.

[A]

Woman in tears. Yes. Woman in stem. I love this. I love this.

[B]

Oh, damn, dude.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Jim, Jim. Jimmit.

[C]

You gotta move now, Jim. Yeah, you can't work at that job anymore. Idiot.

[A]

Who's gonna work his little drinks for him during the summer?

[C]

The devil.

[B]

He's gonna die of thirst.

[C]

Oh shit.

[B]

He might actually.

[C]

But that sucks.

[A]

Cause he's an airhead and he's like,

[B]

oh, I forgot water.

[C]

Oh, I've made of it.

[B]

Oops.

[A]

Yeah, stupid gym.

[B]

You gotta live with that forever. Yep. Like. Cause he's 30, it's like, okay. Like when he's dating someone else, it's like, oh, so why'd your seven year relationship not work? He's like, well,

[C]

so I was really in love with her best friend for seven years.

[A]

I just didn't say that.

[B]

And she said she was gay, but what is that? And she was dating women, but.

[A]

Right. But it was all an act.

[B]

I would get caught because she didn't want me to. She didn't want, you know, she was trying to.

[C]

She was just trying to be polite.

[A]

Totally. I guess we know just how emotionally mature this guy really is.

[B]

No, for sure.

[C]

And that's very little.

[B]

Very little mature.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Okay, okay. Our final story comes from the subreddit relationships.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

This is posted in 2018. Whoa, the old days. Yeah. There's a 28 year old woman. She writes, My boyfriend, who's 27 of three years, keeps doing the same comedy routine of trying to impersonate my cat. I know that's a really weird title, but it's kind of a really weird thing. So last week something startled the cat and she did this funny jump in, surprise. My boyfriend then imitated it. It actually was funny the first couple times and we were laughing. But ever since then, he's now started copying, for lack of a better word, everything the cat does, he curls up on the couch in the same position as her. He has also tried to perch himself on the back of the couch with his legs and hands tucked under him in that ball position cats do, and it just looks ridiculous. He plays with the cat toys and scratching posts like she does. He sometimes runs on all fours up the stairs. If he sees she's sleeping, he'll lay down nearby and also pretend he's sleeping. He'll stay like that until she gets up or I nag him to stop because there's, like, actual adult things he needs to do. HE IMITATES her meows and a couple nights ago, she started yowling downstairs while we were having sex. Right there in the moment, he made the same screeching sound while inside me. It completely ruined the mood for me. Yeah, he doesn't. He doesn't do all this, like, all day, 100% of the time, but maybe half the time the cat does something, he'll do it too. If I tell him he's being annoying, he does stop, but within a few hours to a day, he just does another cat thing. Like a week ago, I asked why he's constantly acting like a cat. It's weird and childish. And he said, well, it's my comedy routine. I'm Catman. Yeah.

[A]

Ah.

[B]

I have told him it's really not funny anymore. It was old after the first 10 times, but he keeps doing it now. It came to tonight when I walked into the kitchen to see he'd put his plate on the floor and was eating off of it with his mouth while the cat was eating her dinner the same way. That was kind of it for me, and I snapped at him. I said, the cat impressions are seriously annoying, not funny, and plain fucking weird at this point. Then he got mad at me for taking it too seriously. He said, I don't get what the big deal is. Who cares? He stomped upstairs where he's been since then. Is there something I'm missing? Is this a typical sort of humor guys have and I just don't get it? If he'd done this from day one, I guess it wouldn't be as weird. But he only started a few days ago. He has not listened to a single time I've told him how annoying it's become. He even said, but you thought it was funny. Just because I laughed the first time doesn't mean I wanted this. Am I totally wrong here? What the fuck is going on and how do I make him see I'm sick of his constant cat imitations.

[C]

Just to start off here, I do want to say that responding with the phrase, it's my comedy routine, I'm catman Catman is objectively, deeply funny.

[B]

Yeah. And probably the most valid thing he could have responded with. Sure.

[C]

But I'm catnapped.

[A]

Well, sorry.

[B]

I am catnip. And you kind of are. That is a bit of a checkmate. And you have to go. You know what? You're right. You're Catman. And I gotta back off. I gotta let you do this.

[A]

Listen, he's got that cat in him,

[B]

and then he throws up a hairball right then and there.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I mean, okay.

[B]

When they were having sex and he imitated a cat, she did have the opportunity to scream at the top of her lungs.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

To fully be like, I'm a cat, too. Here we go.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then we're doing the cat.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Cause I don't know if you have seen that. That shit's crazy.

[A]

Cat play.

[B]

If you were ever unfortunate enough to hear cats having sex anywhere within a mile radius, it's the sounds of hell, Right? Yeah.

[A]

And you're saying they should have imitated that.

[B]

I'm saying she had the opportunity to maybe end this whole thing by being

[C]

like, all right, I see a cat noise.

[B]

If you're cat.

[A]

I'm a cat.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then go. Go for it. And then let it rip.

[C]

And then that'll never be new for him, which is unfortunate.

[B]

Yeah. And then he's scared.

[C]

Look, that. That sucks a lot. I do think one of the most important things before you live with a partner is know how they talk to animals. Like, I'm serious. Like, that's. That can be. That's gonna come up a lot. I don't know. It's another one of those situations where it just has to be safe to bring something up to somebody. Like, you know, hey, I actually. I'm so sorry. I don't even know why, but this noise, specifically, it really bothers me.

[B]

Totally.

[C]

You know, I know you're having fun. I'm so sorry. I feel like a jerk for even having to say it, but the noise bugs me. Can we adjust? And that's all it should really take. But the fact that she's tried multiple times, and he's like, what do you mean? It's like. Well, then it's funny. For who? Cause there's no other audience.

[B]

He put that plate down and was eating off of it without her in the room. That's why he's doing this. Is he doing this for the cast? Like, does he think.

[C]

Is it, man Cat? Yeah. Oh, shit.

[A]

I think the part that stuck out for me was when she said, like, you Know that she has to nag him to go do real adult things.

[B]

Oh, there's bigger things going on. Yeah, there's a lot.

[A]

I think this is grounds for maybe talking to somebody.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

It feels like. Cause I don't know that it feels so much of like. Yeah. Maybe in his head, he's justifying it as a comedy routine. But I think, again, like, you're saying if you're doing it with. Without anybody nearby, I think he's genuinely convincing himself that he is one with the cats. And he's behaving in all sorts of ways that isn't for an audience.

[C]

You know, I'll say this. My cat, Freya, when I got her from the rescue or whatever, I won her over. I've told this story before. It's old tale, a fast version, but, like, I would take naps, like, near the sofa while she was also napping. Like, I'd be on the ground doing it to sort of, like, gain trust and show her it's safe. Let's her in, you know, and so there's like, some behaviors you can do with an animal that is sort of like, I don't know, part of connecting with them, like, curling up with them and taking a nap. Feels great. That's awesome. Like, even if it's on the floor in a sunbeam, like, yeah, lay down with your cat. But the idea of him, like, I'm gonna play with her toys. Not necessarily with her, but, like, I'm gonna play with. Or I guess they didn't establish the cat.

[B]

He's using the scratch pose.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Wait, did they say that?

[A]

Yeah, he's using the cat toys.

[C]

No, we're good. That's maybe a 51, 56.

[B]

We're all right.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, there's also probably. I think some. There's a chance that this is so tied to the idea of just wanting to make her laugh the way that she did the first time. And he maybe is just remembering how good that felt.

[B]

But she has not laughed in a minute.

[C]

Watch the SpongeBob Ripped Pants episode. It's an allegory for exactly this.

[A]

Yes. Yes, actually. And it's like, maybe in his brain or the way that his mind is working is he's like, I have to commit that much more to get that laugh again. And so he's, like, fully immersing himself in it.

[B]

Yeah, he should go take a clowning workshop. Cause we did that. And, boy, was that harsher than I thought it would be.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Where like, you do a bit and it makes people Laugh. And the instructor goes, oh, the audience liked that. Oh, where can I keep going? And you do it more. And then people stop laughing. And the instructor literally looks you in the face and goes, they're not liking that.

[A]

That's not going well.

[B]

They're not finding that funny.

[C]

Do something else.

[A]

You gotta find out it was funny, but now we're over it.

[B]

You gotta do something different now. And it's like, it is shocking to have someone say it so plainly to you.

[A]

Yeah. This is actually just a story about how difficult comedy is.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So we understand you.

[B]

It is really the worst. The worst thing about comedy is that the same thing does not work forever. Like, you do a thing, you're like, oh, my God, we hit. Fuck. Yeah. That hit.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And that's gonna get old. So we gotta find a new thing. It's the most brutal aspect of, like. It's like, great. We found a funny, awesome thing. I feel like whenever we have, like, a character or a joke that works here at Smosh, and then you hit a couple months in, and you're like, now we have to find a new one.

[A]

Yeah, totally, totally. I think the cat thing could still work too. I think he just needs.

[B]

He needs to refine it a little bit.

[A]

Yeah, he just needs to make it work. No, Cause genuinely, I was just at a show two nights ago, and this guy was talking about his show where he literally is a cat and he shows different careers as a cat.

[B]

This guy does need to find a production of Cats.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And get in it.

[A]

Right. He just needs his specific pov. So we're at cringe right now because we haven't found it, but there's something there.

[B]

Put him in the right context. It's no longer cringe. It's art.

[A]

Absolutely. In the right litter box, if you

[C]

will, but very far away from the op.

[A]

Got it. Yeah.

[B]

So some comments, and the top comment, at least he hasn't started using the litter box. Or has he?

[C]

I listened to Perfect Person the other day, and there was a caller that, like, that's Miles Monsignore's podcast, if nobody but you should know. He's awesome.

[B]

He's the best.

[C]

And he's guested here too. Yeah, there was an episode where, like, roommates were using the litter box, and I was like, oh. Oh, that's. You have to send them to jail. I don't know what you mean.

[B]

That feels like a crime. Someone said, this is weird. Are you sure he doesn't have some kind of fetish? I mean, meowing back at the Cat or whatever is fairly normal, but putting his plate on the ground to eat off of it with his mouth. There's something else going on here. I mean, you weren't even in the room when he started doing it, so it couldn't have been for his comedy routine. Op said, what kind of fetish would this be? You mean like a furry? If he's into that, There have been no signs whatsoever.

[C]

I don't think that's a furry thing.

[B]

No, no, that's. Yeah. Lastly, someone said, you obviously need to bark like a dog and chase him up and down the stairs.

[A]

That's hot.

[C]

You have to spay and neuter your boyfriend.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Sorry. Bob Barker told me I gotta do it. I was watching spray. I was watching the Price is Right. Gotta cut off your balls now.

[A]

Ah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think you'd like it.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah. I just am like, you're meowing at your cat. It's so fun to talk to your cats like they're a person.

[A]

Sure, sure. But we gotta get back to him doing it while they're having sex.

[C]

Oh, yeah. That's a big one.

[B]

You don't recover from that.

[C]

I don't think I was about to say. You don't come back from that.

[B]

Nah, it's over.

[C]

That's it. There's only before and after.

[A]

I think I'd literally rather be called a different name than hear a meow.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

No, I'll bring it back to. I'll bring it back to couples therapy, that show that I love. And, like, they're dealing with all sorts of crazy shit, like, cheating, horrible, like, things. But if they were talking and they're like, yeah, he meowed at our cat while we were having sex, I think she'd be like, that's the most fucked up thing I've ever heard in my life.

[A]

Leave him, girl.

[B]

What the fuck? Yeah. Ugh.

[C]

Get him, boys.

[B]

Get him.

[A]

There better be an update.

[B]

There's no update. That's it.

[A]

What? No, but Catman.

[C]

What about.

[B]

What else was Catman gonna do?

[A]

You know, grow older.

[C]

What's Catman do?

[B]

What? Catman find a villain.

[C]

But I'm more worried about OP.

[B]

Me too. Hopefully she gets out.

[A]

I mean, listen, it'll be an awesome thing for her. Comedy routine.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

When she discusses her ex boyfriend totally meowing, that's her future. Yeah.

[B]

Anyways, that's it for all of our stories.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

We did it.

[B]

We did it. But thank you both for being here.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

Thank you, Shane. Yeah.

[B]

This has been a lot of course. I feel like you guys always have such great takes and advice.

[C]

Oh, thank you.

[B]

Very level headed and a great duo, so. Oh, that should be a show.

[C]

Do you know them, your duos?

[B]

Do you know them, your duos?

[C]

How many duo do you know in the world do you know?

[A]

Meow.

[C]

Bring it back.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

Please cut that. Meow.

[B]

The Don poop meow. Girl,

[A]

you

[B]

all right? Thank you for watching. We'll see you next week. Next Saturday. Goodbye. Thanks again to Doordash for sponsoring this episode of Reddit Stories.