Ultimate Betrayal Stories | Reading Reddit Stories

Summary

Smosh Reads Reddit Stories

Episode: Ultimate Betrayal Stories | Reading Reddit Stories

Date: August 16, 2025

Host: Shayne Topp
Guests: Ian Hecox, Courtney Miller (and other Smosh cast)

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Smosh Reads Reddit Stories" dives deep into tales of betrayal pulled straight from Reddit. Host Shayne Topp and co-hosts Ian and Courtney react in real-time to a series of jaw-dropping, infuriating, and occasionally heartbreaking stories submitted to various Reddit forums. While their signature banter and irreverent humor are ever-present, the cast also brings thoughtful (sometimes therapeutic) perspectives on being wronged, personal boundaries, and healing. This episode is packed with high drama, memorable quotes, and the infectious energy of the Smosh crew.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage: Summer Games & Betrayal (01:00–02:45)

• Shayne, Ian, and Courtney banter about the conclusion of Smosh Summer Games, playfully accusing each other of betrayal ("Dream on"—Ian, 01:26).
• The hosts segue into the theme of the day: Betrayal. Jokes about the "Halo" announcer's iconic "Betrayal!" (Ian: "Do you not hear it in the guy from Halo’s voice?" 02:50).

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2. Story 1: "Am I the Asshole for Stopping My Classmate from Winning an Award and Making Her Cry?" (03:25–11:34)

Story Recap:
A 17-year-old, bullied for facial scars, develops a crush on a girl (Beck) who appears sweet but secretly uses him for clout and a community service award. She posts demeaning comments about him on social media. Upon discovering her scheme, he exposes her to the award committee, resulting in her crying and being withdrawn from the nomination. The Reddit poster feels ostracized but justified.

Key Reactions:

• The cast is shocked by the calculated nature of the girl's betrayal.
  • Shane: "She thought she was being a good human by organizing this entire thing… you’re actually not a good person." (08:06)
  • Courtney: "This is high school. Is mean." (09:27)
• Discussions circle around self-image and moving on after trauma.
  • Courtney: “Girls, scars are awesome.” (07:19)
  • Shane: "He describes himself as tall, intimidating, has two scars—sounds like an action hero, badass." (07:30)
• Reflection on high school cruelty and hope for the poster’s future.
  • Ian: "This is gonna get so much ass when he gets older. Let’s just be real. Two scars." (09:39)
  • Shane: "When you’re 17, life sucks… but you’ll move past this." (09:57)

Notable Quote:

• “She’s the ugly one here.” — Reddit comment, quoted by Courtney (11:34)

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3. Story 2: "I Found Out Why My Husband Hides His Best Friend From Me" (16:36–26:20)

Story Recap:
Woman finds out her husband has been cheating with his male best friend, Caro, since before their marriage. Entire friend group knew and kept the secret. She is devastated but still in love.

Key Reactions:

• Stunned by the depth of the deception:
  • Ian: "I just thought… maybe they had a little fling. But this is… a full-blown relationship." (19:03)
  • Courtney: "I could not go over a woman's house and keep this secret from her." (20:03)
• Compassion for the poster grappling with betrayal and conflicting emotions:
  • Shane: "This is as extreme as cheating really gets beyond having a secret family… full-on has another relationship." (23:29)
  • Courtney: "She just needs to leave." (24:53)
• Discussion of cultural/family pressures (husband is bisexual, possibly can’t marry a man):
  • Shane: "It's possible Dylan at least thinks his family would not be okay with him marrying a man." (22:16)
• Empathy for loneliness and gaslighting by friends:
  • Courtney: "All her friends lied to her too… you don't trust anyone now." (23:40)

Update:
She leaves her husband and cuts off the friend group.

Notable Quote:

• “What you thought you had with Dylan was just a dream. You dreamt that up all by yourself. Every liar by extension in your friend group watched you sleep, then aided Dylan and Caro to keep you in the dark.” — Reddit comment read by Shane (24:17)

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4. Story 3: "Am I the Asshole for Throwing a Cup of Cold Water on My Naked Husband?" (27:13–40:57)

Story Recap:
A frustrated wife describes how, for 20 years, her husband repeatedly forgets to reset the shower diverter, resulting in her being doused with cold water. After one last straw, she drenches him with cold water in retaliation.

Key Reactions:

• The Smosh crew is bewildered; discussion about relationship dealbreakers and small annoyances:
  • Courtney: "If you're with someone for 20 years and it's the shower thing, I don't know, you either have to leave or stick it out." (33:48)
• Insight into communication and resentment:
  • Ian: "If she was able to speak to her feelings around that issue… it's better to communicate rather than saying, ‘I got assaulted with water so now I’m going to assault you with water.’" (36:14)
• Admonishment for escalation and advice to address underlying issues:
  • Shane: "You want him to… start remembering things. It's like, adapt. If that's a dealbreaker for you, then you should have addressed that." (32:13)

Reddit Verdict & Update:

• Verdict: YTA (You’re the Asshole), and "poo mode activated"—Reddit’s way of saying she’s especially unpleasant here.
• OP comments she needs to get out of the relationship: "I don't like the person I am when I'm around him anymore." (40:57)
• Therapy is called for: "Nonviolent Communication" book is recommended.

Notable Quotes:

• "She was in a rageful place. You did not write this for us to be on your side." (38:28 – Courtney/ Shane)
• "Write out the statement, 'My husband annoyed me so I physically attacked him' and stare at it for a while." — Reddit comment, read by Shane (39:51)

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5. Story 4: "Am I the Asshole for Divorcing My Wife After She Drunkenly Exposed Me to Our Friends?" (42:25–54:15)

Story Recap:
A man’s wife drunkenly jokes in front of friends about his penis size, exposing a private bedroom humiliation game to their circle. He leaves the party in humiliation and considers divorce.

Key Reactions:

• The roast is brutal and the hosts are momentarily stunned:
  • “No, no, no, no, no.” — Ian (43:47)
• Sympathy for the poster’s vulnerability:
  • Shane: "Regardless of all these things… your partner body shamed you in front of all your friends.” (49:41)
• Frank discussion about irreparable trust and violation:
  • Courtney: “Divorce. Word.” (50:14)
• Ian and Courtney try imagining how to own it publicly; advice to seek counseling rather than end everything over one slip.

Update:
The couple has a serious talk, agree on boundaries, and both pursue individual and couples counseling. Wife quits drinking for now.

Notable Quotes:

• "The only antidote to public humiliation is public lionization." — Reddit comment, read by Shane (51:24)
• "But above all, you are not the asshole and you are enough. You are a man deserving of respect and love from your partner." — Reddit comment, read by Shane (52:46)

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6. Story 5: "Am I the Asshole for Not Attending My Son’s Wedding and Spending the Evening With His Ex-Wife Instead?" (54:30–62:36)

Story Recap:
A father declines to attend his son's wedding due to his son's abusive and controlling history with his ex-wife, with whom the father has remained close. He instead spends the wedding night supporting the ex-daughter-in-law, seeing her as family and wanting to help her. The son is furious and declares his father dead to him.

Key Reactions:

• The crew is moved by the father's unwavering support:
  • Courtney: “The father sounds like a sweet, sweet man.” (57:12)
• Details reveal the son was abusive—controlling, manipulative, isolating his wife; the hosts are horrified:
  • Shane: “For the parents to quickly be like, he's in the wrong… what is going on?” (57:27)
  • Courtney: "No partner should ever tell you how you should wear your hair." (59:51)
• Applause for the family putting children and the victim first
  • Ian: "It sounds to me like she's trying to be the peacekeeper... she doesn't want to lose her son." (62:06)
  • Courtney: “I think it’s really great they are taking that side and supporting her because it sounds like she doesn't have any support.” (62:28)

Update:

• The son finds out about the post, cuts ties ("he’s dead to me now"). The father stands firm, stating the grandkids and their mother are his priority.

Notable Quotes:

• “He’s in the wrong, and we’re completely on our ex’s side… what is going on?” — Shane (57:27)
• “Your children have to be our number one priority. They’re not just some disposable items you can leave behind when one chapter of your life comes.” — OP’s wife, quoted by Shane (61:58)

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Memorable Moments — Quotes & Timing

• On Betrayal:
  • Ian: “When you read the word betrayal, do you not hear it in the voice from the guy from Halo going, ‘betrayal’?” (02:50)
• On High School Cruelty:
  • Shane: “I am blown away by people who can do like this much effort into hurting someone.” (09:29)
• On Secrets and Friendships:
  • Courtney: “Some people can just live life keeping secrets…” (20:14)
• On Venting:
  • Shane: “That’s probably some of the most like, vitriol we’ve ever read in a Reddit story.” (41:27)
• On Respect:
  • Shane (re: public humiliation): “She doubled down on her statement by saying, ‘I’m so sorry,’ letting everyone know it was the truth.” (51:19)

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Highlighted Timestamps

• [01:00–02:45] — Smosh Games wrap-up and introducing the “Betrayal” theme
• [03:25–11:34] — Story 1: High school betrayal (scars and award scandal)
• [16:36–26:20] — Story 2: Husband’s secret gay affair, group betrayal
• [27:13–40:57] — Story 3: Cold-water revenge and the slow build of resentment
• [42:25–54:15] — Story 4: Bedroom “humiliation” made public, trust crisis
• [54:30–62:36] — Story 5: Parent sides with ex-daughter-in-law over controlling son

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Tone & Language

True to Smosh form, the episode balances irreverent humor, genuine empathy, and no-holds-barred honesty. The hosts freely joke (“Tall. Intimidating. Plays the guitar. This man is IN.” — Courtney, 09:45), but also take time to validate feelings and offer thoughtful advice (“It’s the feeling behind the action,” — Ian, 34:52). There’s liberal use of profanity, especially when reading posts verbatim.

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Final Takeaways

• High school and social betrayals can be cruel but are (hopefully) temporary.
• Deep secrets, abuse, and betrayal — whether in marriage or handled by friend groups — can devastate but also clarify what you really expect from loved ones.
• Small annoyances, if left unaddressed, can fester into real resentment (sometimes requiring therapy or drastic action).
• Family loyalty should not come at the expense of enabling harmful behavior.

The Smosh team reminds listeners that whatever the betrayal, you can survive and move on — and that sometimes, online strangers dispense surprisingly good (if unpaid) therapy.

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Transcript

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[Shane]

Hello and welcome to Smosh Reads Reddit Stories. I'm Shane, and today's theme is going to be betrayal. And as you all know, our Summer Games have concluded, which I'm sure had a lot of betrayal in it. So I think this theme is gonna be fitting. Now, we haven't started Summer Games as of recording this, but I think it's clear to know by now that the Hollywood hot dogs have probably won. Whoa. Great.

[Ian]

Dream on.

[Courtney]

That's not what I predicted. I predicted that Ian's t was actually gonn.

[Ian]

You are predicting that there's kind of no way that we can lose.

[Shane]

Okay, well.

[Courtney]

And my character is a blast. Yeah, she's gonna be a real joy.

[Shane]

Around a fan favorite.

[Courtney]

Fan favorite.

[Shane]

She's Sunshine as of this episode airing. Fan favorite.

[Courtney]

Fan favorite.

[Shane]

Well, how do we think the games went overall?

[Ian]

Yeah, I mean, I think they went really great. I think my promposal was wildly inappropriate and I apologize for the things that I said on a school campus, but I can't take back what's already been done. Right?

[Courtney]

Yeah. That was wild.

[Shane]

As of now, when you haven't done.

[Courtney]

It yet, you haven't done it yet.

[Ian]

I'm like, take it back.

[Shane]

What do you have prepared if you have not watched Summer Games, I highly recommend going back these past two weeks of content and watch it all on this channel and on the Smosh Games channel it is. I mean, this was a big event for us. We've been working on this for a long time.

[Ian]

People have been asking for years for Smosh Summer Games to come back, and we did it. Here it is, baby. Y2K themed. It was a lot of fun.

[Courtney]

2005 high school, we love it.

[Shane]

It was a blast. I know that.

[Courtney]

Oh, my God, Summer's gonna be so much fun, you guys.

[Shane]

Guys, Summer's gonna be the best.

[Ian]

We're talking about betrayal.

[Shane]

Yeah. But now we're on to betrayal.

[Ian]

When you read the word betrayal, do you not hear it in the voice from the guy from Halo going, betrayal?

[Shane]

In fact, to this day, whenever I hear betrayal, I think of betrayal. Legacy.

[Ian]

Oh, okay.

[Shane]

We did it for so long that every time I hear betrayal, I'm like, oh, are we doing another one? Like, that was our.

[Courtney]

The haunt has begun.

[Shane]

We did it so much for so long that I'm like, that is ingrained in my soul.

[Courtney]

Yeah. Remember, come up with a character from 18. 17. Okay.

[Shane]

Yeah. It was a lot of fun.

[Courtney]

It was so much fun.

[Shane]

All right, onto our first story. Am I the asshole for purposely stopping my classmate from winning an award and subsequently making her cry? This issue is honestly making me frustrated. Almost everyone is saying I am in the wrong. People are talking behind my back and I genuinely don't know if what I did was correct or not. I just feel so lost. Please, please do help. I am 17 and suffered a major accident while cycling when I was 13. I have two really deep long facial scars. I have been bullied really badly because of it. I am tall, ugly, and intimidating as per most girl of other people by saying things like, why don't you just hook up with me? I am honestly used to it. Those people didn't matter to me anyway. But there is this girl I had known since middle school. Let's call her Beck, I guess. Sorry, I honestly don't know how this works. I had a really, really big crush on her till a few days ago. I thought she was genuinely sweet and amazing. My family is incredibly supportive, so they urged me to ask her out. I can play a guitar, so I made this whole song for her. I went to the neighboring city to get her favorite chocolate and stuff like that. This was the first time I felt like really going and asking someone out in my life. And I felt that regardless of what I do, she shall see me for who I am and at least accept me as a friend. I was over the moon when she ended up accepting. We went to a fancy restaurant, had a fun time together, and walked for 30 minutes. She was really sweet to me. The next week or so was honestly heaven. People started noticing me. Even her friends seemed friendly with me. I honestly cried every day because I felt so fortunate to get so much love. It all broke down when a friend of hers who was on Instagram and followed Beck sent screenshots to me. I honestly felt betrayed and disgusted. She had posts saying, fulfilled his lifelong wish by being his Valentine, making his day by finally helping him interact with my friends. He is ugly, but beautiful people. Except ugly people. Ugly peoplematter, et cetera. Beck's friend then. Whoa. Beck's friend then explained to me that she apparently wanted a good social media image and had thus asked all her friends to be kind to me and tolerate me till the first week of March and then distanced themselves from me. She apparently wanted to win some stupid positive role model award for her college application because she was lagging behind in community service. She thought playing with my feelings for a few days wouldn't hurt. And apparently, since I was ugly, she was the kind one to give me attention. Anyway, I was in tears and honestly felt disgusted. My blood was boiling. I researched this award and found a Facebook page about it online. I went to the authorities to confirm if her name was on the nominations list and then had my friends at work and family as an alibi. She is apparently crying a lot because she received a message from the committee saying her nomination was withdrawn. I am now even more ostracized in school, but honestly, I have no remorse whatsoever and feel far more satisfied.

[Courtney]

What's happening?

[Ian]

Okay. All right. Well, yeah. I mean, like, look, it doesn't feel good to be used.

[Shane]

No. And especially be like, I don't know. Okay, can I say, she submitted this to be a positive role model, and her post says, he is ugly, but beautiful people accept ugly people. Hashtag ugly people matter.

[Ian]

I don't think she would have won.

[Shane]

I think she's gonna win.

[Courtney]

Who's kidding?

[Ian]

Yeah, exactly.

[Shane]

I'm pretty sure that's bullying.

[Courtney]

Why is she crying? Honey, it wasn't good from the beginning.

[Shane]

What a weird choice.

[Courtney]

Also, people need to stop throwing around the word ugly. Beauty's in the eye of the beholder. Like, whatever. He needs to stop saying that he's ugly. I'm just kidding. But, like, honestly, not you.

[Ian]

No, not you.

[Shane]

I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

[Courtney]

I mean, you have things to work on.

[Shane]

I mean, you're working on it.

[Courtney]

You're fun. You're a fun guy. Gosh, Sorry, what were you saying using the word ugly? Like, I'm just like, you guys, stop. This guy just keep throwing around the word ugly, and it's like, hey, let's start there.

[Shane]

I'm very sad that he is, like, he says, I am tall, ugly, and intimidating, as are most girls. So that's what it's saying. Girls scars are awesome.

[Ian]

Yeah. Like two deep facial scars. That sounds kind of hard.

[Shane]

He kind of describes himself. He describes himself initially here by being like, I'm tall, intimidating, and I have two scars. I'm like, you sound like an action hero. Badass.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Actually get a job. Intimidating.

[Courtney]

Does he not sound like that Irish actor with the two scars right here? Yeah, I don't know his name and I don't care.

[Shane]

Thank you. Yeah, he's like, here's a photo of me and it's just him. A cool looking guy.

[Ian]

Heath Ledger, joker.

[Shane]

We're like, you're badass, man.

[Ian]

Oh, man.

[Shane]

But I feel so bad and I think, like, he's terrible. I think when he becomes an adult, he's gonna meet so many more people who just have different perspectives on things. But high school is just vicious.

[Courtney]

This is vicious that she thought that she was being a good human by organizing this entire thing to be and then tell her friends, be nice to him and then distance yourself so I can get this award. And it's like, but the award, you're not getting the essence of it because you're actually not a good person.

[Ian]

And you're actually making his life worse by way worse. She's getting this false sense of friendship and camaraderie and just having everyone drop a master.

[Courtney]

What do you mean to do, like?

[Shane]

Cause like, I think we all go through life and there's moments where we do things that we go, oh, that was mean. Or, oh, I regret that. To do a premeditated long term plan of like, we're gonna go on a date and we're gonna hang out for hours, and it's all a lie and I'm bullying you in this long form way. I'm like, how can you sit across from someone at a dinner and like, talk and have a conversation while you're doing this to them and then cry.

[Courtney]

Over not being nominated? Not cry over, wait, I fucked that person up.

[Shane]

I messed him up even more than he was already hating himself.

[Ian]

This seems like the setup to, like, Carrie.

[Shane]

Yeah, I mean, it kind of is.

[Courtney]

I mean, I'm waiting for the update.

[Shane]

Sorry, no, no update. Oh, no.

[Courtney]

Pig's blood. That comes the betrayal.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

This is high school. Is mean.

[Shane]

People are really mean. I mean, really mean. Oh, my God, I am blown away by people who can do like this much effort into hurting someone.

[Courtney]

This is gonna get so much ass when he gets older. Let's Just be real. Two scars.

[Shane]

He's tall. Tall.

[Ian]

He's tall.

[Courtney]

Intimidating. Plays the guitar. Went and got chocolates. Plays the guitar. Neighboring town to get chocolates. A 30 minute walk after dinner. So your tummy feels good. This man is in.

[Shane]

He really seems, like, awesome. I mean, look, man, when you're 17, just. Life sucks. Life sucks. You don't know. Like, I don't think anyone when they're a teenager, even into their early 20s, should be saying, they're ugly. I'm like, you don't like, hey, man. All of it's also in, like, finding your own personal style and your personality, like, that's attractiveness. I think this guy's gonna be fine. So long as he. But he has to let go of the hatred.

[Courtney]

Yeah. Yeah. So let go.

[Shane]

He has to not buy into what these horrible people are doing.

[Courtney]

You know who's not gonna be fine?

[Shane]

Her.

[Courtney]

She's gonna turn 35 and go, what did I do to that guy? Hopefully.

[Shane]

Hopefully. The verdict was not the asshole. Sure.

[Courtney]

No.

[Shane]

He did nothing wrong. No. Did absolutely nothing wrong. Not the asshole. This is so fucked up. It's beyond words. How did she even qualify for an award like that with this as her entry submission? What she did to you was dehumanizing and so incredibly out of line. Everyone's on her side because you're surrounded by assholes at school, but I promise you, you will move past this. OP said, thank you for saying this. I honestly was confused and still am to some extent, because everyone in high school sided. Your trust in me genuinely matters. I just let the whole truth out. Thank you for trusting me. Have a nice day. Someone said, hey, I'm so sorry it's like this right now, but there is no question that pretending to like you and use you for an award is beyond dishonest and fucking evil. She's pretty unpopular, and that seems to be all that matters at your school. The best thing about school is that it ends and you'll never see these assholes again. I wish you the absolute best, dude. OP said, thank you so much. I can't wait for it to end. I got into my dream college, so that's something I look forward to, too. I wish you the absolute best, too. Thank you. Someone said, not the asshole. She's the. The ugly one here.

[Courtney]

Oh, that one's legit real.

[Shane]

This guy seems like he's winning in pretty much all aspects of life. Yeah, he's winning. So just. Yeah. Get out of that high school and get on with your life. Get on today's Red Stories is brought to you by Quint. Why drop a fortune on basics when you don't have to? Quint has the good stuff. High quality fabrics, classic fits and lightweight layers for warm weather, you name it. And all at prices that make sense. Look, everything I've ordered from Quint's has been nothing but solid. Quince has closet staples you'll want to reach for over and over, like cozy cashmere and cotton sweaters from just $50, breathable flow knit polos and comfortable lightweight pants that somehow work for both weekend hangs and dressed up dinners. By working directly with top artisans and cutting out the middlemen, Quint's gives you luxury pieces without the markup. I got this corduroy jacket as well as a nice cashmere Henley sweater from Quince and I'm a big fan of both pieces. 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We attended all the same schools from the time we met up until college. In that time we've both made our own friend groups. He's been more connected with his friends than I have and because of that I've become a part of that group as well. I'd like to think in that time I've been around 50% of their group hangouts, mostly because of my job, but sometimes I'm just straight up not invited. I didn't question any of this because hey, they're his friends, he doesn't see them nearly as often as he sees me. It's not my business. My husband met his best friend, Caro, 27, male, long before he met me. I knew almost nothing about Caro up until recently. He wasn't at our wedding, nor did he attend any of the same schools as us. And I was under the impression he wasn't friends with anyone in our group. I thought all of this was because of his line of work. As I was told, he traveled a lot. Last year, me and my husband went to a barbecue hosted by another couple in the group. Caro was there. I didn't recognize him at first, but when I realized who he was, I was honestly kind of shocked. I had seen him in person before, but he always kept a very, very good distance from me, which I'm realizing now was intentional. Anyways, he's totally stunning. He looks like he could be a supermodel. When I attempted to make conversation with him, he seemed really nervous and totally shut me down after a few sentences. When I mentioned this behavior to anyone else, they also shut me down saying things like that's just how he is. Or maybe you said something that offended him. In short, no one would tell me anything about Caro at all. Any conversation that involved him was a no go. At the end of the night, I tried talking to Dylan about his behavior. He told me Caro didn't like me. I was confused because I'd hardly seen him in person at all, let alone actually talk to him. The excuse my husband gave was that he disliked me because I cheated on my husband once in college and Caro was too stubborn to let it go. I've seen Caro less than a dozen times since then. Mostly at birthday parties, huge get togethers, and on one occasion he came to our house to watch a football game with my husband and a few of their other buddies. Anyways, a few weeks ago, my husband went fishing with his cousin. That same night I had some of the girls in our friend group over for a girls night type thing. Lily, a 24 year old woman, was scrolling through some social media. I was glancing over her shoulder when I saw a selfie of Dylan and Caro sitting next to each other in a hot tub. The selfie had been posted maybe 30 minutes ago. I asked Lily about what I had seen and she went pale. She tried saying nothing, but I snatched the phone from her and went to the profile that posted the photo. The profile belonged to my husband. It was a private profile, and scrolling through the photos, most of them were dirty jokes or memes. But the rest of them were photos of him and Caro. Either they were hanging out alone or with the rest of the group, minus me. Most of the photos seemed way too close, too touchy, or doing things that seemed too personal or intimate for friends to be doing. I spent a good 10 minutes looking before I couldn't take it anymore. I was horrified. All of the photos were dated to nights my husband told me he was working late, hanging out with this relative or that times that he told me he was doing something else. And obviously hangouts I wasn't invited to. Lily just sat there looking dumb. She didn't say anything, but all the girls were looking at us like a bomb had just gone off. They clearly knew what I had seen, and their reactions were enough to confirm exactly what I was afraid of. I was livid. I started yelling. Lily was crying, and the rest of the girls were freaking out. When I started to calm down and demanded that they explain what was going on, Lily told me everything. Dylan and Caro had been sleeping together and very essentially dating behind my back since before we even got married. They got together during a me and Dylan had during college and they stuck together ever since. They all knew and none of them told me until I found out the hard way. Caro wasn't at our wedding because he felt guilty. He avoided me like the fucking plague because he felt guilty. They arranged group meetups in a group chat I wasn't in because they all liked Caro enough to spare his feelings. Even the guys in the group felt the same way about him. Apparently, Caro was never as distant as I thought he was. He was just being hidden. Dylan was hiding him from me because he didn't want me to find out they were together. By the end of it, half of us were sobbing and everyone who wasn't was apologizing to me. I was so angry. I made them swear they wouldn't say anything to Dylan or anyone else. I kicked them all out and cried myself to sleep. I was basically in denial, like it was some kind of sick fucking prank. My husband didn't come home until the next morning. He told me all about the supposed fishing trip he'd gone on. I didn't say anything about what I knew. I guess he could tell something was up because he kept asking me what was wrong all day, every fucking five minutes. Eventually, I just told him I'd been in an argument with my sister by the end of the week. I was totally num Last night while my husband was Handing out candy to kids. I saw a notification pop up on his phone. Since I knew his password, I opened it. It was a text from Caro. I looked through the conversations they'd had. It confirmed everything. It was devastating. Dylan texted Caro the exact same way he texted me. He told Caro he loved him. Every sweet thing he said to me had been said. In his conversations with Caro, I was hardly mentioned. I put his phone back before he noticed Dylan is at work. Now I don't know what to do. I could never imagine myself leaving Dylan because he's such a loving partner and a good man. But I can't see myself winning in a compet if that's what it comes down to. I can't even make myself be disgusted or angered by Dylan. I love him too much. I'm not even upset with Caro. But I'm so hurt. I don't want to risk losing my husband and I don't want to share him. I called Lily and my sister this morning and told them about what I had found. They both asked what I'm going to do and I had nothing to say. I don't know what to do at all.

[Ian]

Jesus Christ.

[Courtney]

I am exhausted.

[Ian]

Wow.

[Courtney]

What?

[Ian]

Cause I just thought. I just saw. Oh, maybe like, you know, they just like had a little fling. They did a little bit of cheat. But this is like. This has been going on.

[Courtney]

Little bit of cheating.

[Shane]

We do a little cheat. Little bit of cheating as a treat.

[Ian]

Just a little pinch of a cheat. But this is like a full blown relationship.

[Courtney]

I didn't expect this at all. I actually thought in my weird brain that Carol was like attracted to her. And he was.

[Shane]

I was thinking that too.

[Courtney]

And he was like aggressively keeping him away. Cause she said he's stunning.

[Shane]

I also thought he's stunning as a supermodel. I thought the husband was keeping him away. Cause she's like, I don't want her. My wife is gonna fall in love with.

[Ian]

That's what I thought.

[Shane]

Cause you're so hot.

[Courtney]

Because you're so hot, bro.

[Shane]

You're so hot, bro. What if we went out?

[Courtney]

Yeah. Should we kiss and do a little cheating?

[Ian]

Maybe that's been a strategy the whole time is to like have sex with Caro. So Caro doesn't have sex with his wife?

[Courtney]

Well, they've been together before.

[Shane]

Before they were even married.

[Ian]

He's always thinking three steps ahead. I don't understand.

[Shane]

The entire friend group was like down to help cover this up.

[Courtney]

And the women came over and. And I could not go Over a woman's house and keep this secret from her.

[Shane]

I know.

[Courtney]

I don't think. I couldn't act like a normal person.

[Shane]

It's coming at me.

[Courtney]

Some people can just live life keeping secrets.

[Shane]

I don't know.

[Ian]

And that makes me think, are they more friends with that couple?

[Courtney]

They are. They have to be. Yeah.

[Shane]

But it's like, damn. But it's like this has been going on long enough that you're friends with both. Or it's like if. If like I'm hanging out with someone and they're like, yeah, I have this long term affair but my partner doesn't know about it. And I'm like, well, either I can't keep that secret or we can't hang out. Cause I'm gonna tell em. Like it's gonna come out.

[Ian]

No.

[Shane]

100%.

[Ian]

I wouldn't be able to keep a secret.

[Courtney]

I would feel sorry.

[Shane]

Even if I was genuinely trying to keep the secret, there's no frigging way I'm gonna do it. Like I'm gonna fail.

[Courtney]

It's not gonna be a comfy hang.

[Shane]

No, it's not a good time.

[Courtney]

Spirituality. Let's pull some tarot cheating. Oh, death card again.

[Shane]

They're all following the secret account where they're just like posting a blatantly about it.

[Ian]

I will say that sometimes what happens in these situations is one of the people will tell other people that it's a consensual situation and then suggest like, but it's like don't ask, don't tell. So don't talk about it. With my partner.

[Shane]

We're in an open relationship, but we don't talk about it.

[Courtney]

Yeah, but.

[Shane]

But I'd still be like, they seemed.

[Courtney]

Like they were like, oh, she found out.

[Shane]

I think you would know that's not true by talking to her. Cause op, there's no way. Conversations with her. Yeah, I would need that confirmed from.

[Courtney]

Both partners also to have an Instagram account.

[Ian]

It's insane.

[Shane]

I'm always shocked by the audacity of cheaters in so many of these stories. Cause there was a cheater who got tattooed the name of his partner.

[Courtney]

Really?

[Shane]

Of the affair partner.

[Courtney]

I remember.

[Ian]

Wow.

[Shane]

You're confident. So we have some context down below where Dylan, the husband is an openly bisexual man and apparently his family and stuff knows and they're okay with it. But there's some. It's possible that Dylan at least thinks that his family would not be okay with him marrying a man. So they're fine with him being bisexual as long as he's married to a woman.

[Courtney]

He's married to a woman and has like the presenting phase of.

[Ian]

But the wife didn't consent to that.

[Shane]

Yeah, I don't. That's all like context.

[Courtney]

So do we think that he would have wanted to get married to Carrow but didn't.

[Shane]

That's possible motivation for the horrible thing he's done. This is so like he's still done a horrible thing.

[Courtney]

This is so sad though. To me this is sad.

[Shane]

It's deeply sad. And you know what I really relate to sadly is how she's still here going, but he's a good man and like I love him. This is clearly initial shock. And to us reading it, it's like you go, why are you. This is gonna end. But in that moment you're trying to let go of this person that you know and it's like, but he's not who you thought he was. No, he is a completely different person.

[Ian]

And there's no way that like he's going to be on board with severing from this other guy.

[Shane]

Exactly.

[Ian]

Like that's just gonna breed an insane amount of resentment that he won't be able to.

[Courtney]

He loves. He's in love. And love.

[Shane]

This is as extreme as cheating really gets beyond having like a secret family. Right. This is full on has another relationship that he almost seems more dedicated to.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And what's sad is like all her friends lied to her too. Like that's so funny. You don't trust anyone now. Comments. He is having a full blown affair. Leave. Also, your friends suck. How long have they known? Were they happy for you to be in an open relationship without you knowing? Disgusting. Someone said he's been with Caro since college, but he married you. And Kara was fine with being a side piece this whole time. Honestly, Dylan can't be worth this. You're married to the idea of having known your person your whole life. Like it was faded. But look at what you're trading for that false narrative. What you thought you had with Dylan was just a dream. You dreamt that up all by yourself. Every liar by extension in your friend group watched you sleep, then aided Dylan and Caro to keep you in the dark. I'm so sorry. Although it feels impossible, there are absolutely better days ahead. Lastly, someone said I honestly would just break up with him and divorce him. It sucks that this happened to you and no was able to be honest to you about it. At the very least, I would spend some time alone and think about what I want and need in my life. I would recommend talking to him about it and letting him know how you feel.

[Courtney]

Because if she gave him an ultimatum, she would be even more hurt because his heart is half. It's like split.

[Shane]

It's done.

[Courtney]

She just needs to leave.

[Shane]

Unfortunately, it is done whether she realizes it or not. Like, I think it's done. Like, I think even if she was like, I want to make this, this work.

[Courtney]

It's done, it's done.

[Shane]

But we'll find out. Update. I was unaware it was a big trend to repost Reddit posts onto TikTok. This is what happened with my first post and the video has almost 700,000 views. A friend of mine, Noah, who I am name dropping because I know he will see this and I appreciate him, dearly, forwarded me the video because he knew it was my post. I explained the situation to him prior and he knew I had posted it. There are several things I want to address and I ask whoever made the video, because they clearly use Reddit posts this too to clear my name. Everybody in my life knows by now, so I see no harm in addressing you personally. To recap, yes, I am leaving Dylan. No, I did not actually cheat on him. It was a huge misunderstanding between the two of us that led him to believe and tell people that I cheated. I don't even know if what he told me about Caro's dislike for me is or was true. No, I am not going to sue him for everything he has. I will no longer be speaking to anyone from that group. I may have been naive, but I am not stupid. No, I still do not know why they chose to betray me like that, and I don't intend on finding out. While his parents were accepting of lgbtq, I don't think they would have been okay with Dylan marrying a man. From here on out, I doubt I will have anything to say. That is all. Thank you. Also, I have never watched Brokeback Mountain, but the jokes about it did make me chuckle. There's that.

[Ian]

Wow.

[Shane]

Okay, Reddit, okay, Reddit.

[Courtney]

They're like, Brokeback Mountain, that was a movie with two guys.

[Ian]

Hey.

[Shane]

I have not actually seen Brokeback Mountain, but in it, they go home.

[Ian]

Not in la. You need to go home. Give us your ally card and go.

[Courtney]

Go. Okay. But in Brokeback Mountain, they go on a fishing trip and that's when they. And that's the famous scene when they're holding each other, looking at the gorgeous mountains. And that's where Heath Ledger met Michelle Williams.

[Ian]

Can you believe that? Crash.

[Shane]

Yeah. I have not seen Brokeback Mountain. But I know it was Rob because I've seen Crash.

[Courtney]

You need to leave right now and go home and watch it.

[Shane]

Okay?

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

Is that okay with everyone?

[Shane]

I am wearing cowboy boots, so I got. I gotta go do it. Gotta go do it. All right, our next story.

[Courtney]

I'm.

[Shane]

That one was a lot.

[Courtney]

I guess we can move on. But this is gonna be forever. It's one of those Reddit stories that's forever.

[Shane]

Forever.

[Courtney]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Our next story comes from. Am I the asshole? Am I the asshole for throwing a cup of cold water on my naked husband?

[Courtney]

Ooh, let's see where it goes.

[Shane]

My husband has been tested for adhd, but he doesn't have it. Was that the opener you guys thought this was gonna have? No. All right. My husband has been tested for adhd, but he doesn't have it. He has the kinds of problems that are associated with adhd. However, he says writing lists, making a schedule, setting alarms, et cetera, is physically painful for him and he'd rather just deal with occasional emergencies rather than be proactive. The specific problem, he just like me, for real. The specific problem, he often forgets to push the shower diverter valve down. You know, the little rod on the tub faucet that you push down to make water fill the tub and pull up to make the water come out of the shower. For nearly 20 fucking years, I have been asking him to push that down. Since I was literally a teenager, I have been asking him to push that fucking thing down at least twice a month. I have a very unpleasant wake up, cold shower because I turn the water on and I get a cold spray from the shower. And every fucking time he's apologetic. And then a week or two later it happens again. He will do better for a while and then it slips in again. He is always telling me that he's working on it and hasn't he been better about it lately? But somehow he's always working on it, always improving, but it never fucking stops. Today I had just fucking had it. I stepped into the shower, turned it on, and had a very cold and rude awakening. I couldn't fucking take it anymore. I grabbed the cup by and filled it about 3 inches with cold water and walked out to where he was standing naked. He had just taken off his pajamas and was going to take his shower after mine. Without warning, while he was looking down, I held that plastic cup firmly in my hand and grasping it tightly, I jerked that motherfucker in a 45 degree angle to get the cold water all over his torso and face. I told him that his apologies were worth the paper they were written on. And I was tired of listening to him congratulate himself for getting better when I had been asking for 20 fucking years to stop doing this shit. I told him I don't accept his apologies and the fact that it's an accident does not excuse it. I told him that from now on, every time I'm taking a cold shower, so will he. That I refuse to be a second class citizen in my own home any longer. And if he refuses to make any changes to treat me better, I will instead make changes to treat him worse. Because I will not tolerate this any longer. I'm going to continue to surprise throw a cold cup of water on him every time I get a surprise cold shower. I'm tired of fucking asking, begging for basic fucking respect and not getting it with the implication that I have to fucking put up with this forever. So Reddit, I know I'm probably an asshole, but am I a justified asshole?

[Courtney]

I've never heard you swear so much.

[Shane]

I don't think I've sweared so much.

[Ian]

Okay.

[Shane]

I hope Jesus isn't watching.

[Courtney]

He is. He is.

[Ian]

Dude. In front of her child. Really?

[Courtney]

Yeah, he is. Jesus is watching. So I have a question. When you go into the shower.

[Shane]

You.

[Courtney]

Can push up the thing or push the thing down, right?

[Ian]

But I guess she's expecting there to be an understanding that like one would expect it not to come out the.

[Shane]

Shower head or you adapt and go.

[Courtney]

He's probably gonna forget this. I'm gonna click it.

[Ian]

But why should a woman have to bend to the.

[Courtney]

No, let's not make this about that.

[Ian]

To the shortcomings of men. Amanda, let's just, let's just.

[Courtney]

Let's just adapt and support our partner.

[Shane]

This story confuses me. Cause I turn on the shower from the side.

[Courtney]

Same before I get inside.

[Ian]

Sure, of course.

[Shane]

Cause I'm scared of this. But I think what it is, this scares me.

[Ian]

What I imagine. Cause it's happened to me before where I didn't get into the shower, but I poked in to turn it on. And the hot water nozzle's on the other side. So you lean over to turn that on first. So your head is where the shower would maybe be spraying. Cause this happened to me before.

[Shane]

I'm also confused. I think almost every shower I've ever come across automatically does that. I've never heard of one where after the shower you have to manually do that.

[Ian]

Well, you can either leave it up or down. And some automatically mine automatically almost Every.

[Shane]

Single one I've ever had automatically does that. But for 20 years, that means the multiple showers they've probably had.

[Courtney]

Mine is Manuel.

[Ian]

Okay, so there are a lot that are. Man.

[Shane]

I'm just saying, I've never come across that.

[Ian]

Yeah, I never.

[Courtney]

Just a little like, okay, are you gonna divorce him? Like, where are we at?

[Ian]

I think there's something more that's going on in this relationship.

[Courtney]

The water so intensely.

[Shane]

Look, she's got a lot of anger.

[Ian]

She is pissed.

[Shane]

20 fucking years.

[Ian]

I would say that's not the show.

[Shane]

She's like, he's been doing this since we were a teenager. I'm like, and you married him. Like, you can't expect people to change. I don't know. Like, that's always been my view of like, hey, he's a forgetful guy. You knew that. I'm kind of like, like, you want him to. You want to marry him and then be like. And now you need to start remembering things.

[Courtney]

It's like, adapt.

[Shane]

You married him for who he was. Like, adapt. If that's a deal breaker for you, then you should have addressed that.

[Courtney]

Maybe she turns it on and waits for her for the cold to hit so she can be like, motherfucker.

[Ian]

I mean, that's the thing. Like, I think there's. There's more going on here. This isn't about the shower. Like, they've been married 20 years. This isn't about some little forgetful shower thing.

[Courtney]

I think it is.

[Shane]

We get zero. She's not giving us any other context, though. I think it actually makes sense. She made this about the shower. This is the thing, though. For some people, it's why, like, my view has always been like, it's the little things that matter so much in, like, any kind of relationship, friendships, romantic relationships, because this is a small thing on a day to day basis, it's like, oh, that's nothing. But over 20 years, it's a big deal for her. But I'm also like, I guess I'm not a believer in, like, people are gonna change that. You can ask for people to change. They need to change themselves. And there's some things they're maybe just not gonna do that on. And you have to accept that personality.

[Courtney]

You have to adapt. But it's like, there are things, There are small things in relationship, things that I couldn't live with. You know when you hang out with another couple and maybe there's another couple who like, run late all the time, sure. I'm like, I couldn't be with that's a small thing in their life. That is a very big thing in my life.

[Shane]

Totally.

[Courtney]

And so, like, I know that, but it's kind of like if you're with someone for 20 years and it's the shower thing, I don't know, you kind of either have to leave or, I think stick it out. I don't know.

[Shane]

It's tough. Cause I am a forgetful person, too. But, like. And I would feel bad if someone was asking me to keep doing something and I kept forgetting. But I do that with myself. I will forget things and I will get mad at myself and be like, I need to remember to do this. I want to start remembering to do this. And I keep forgetting, and it's really hard. My solution in this situation, if I'm him and I care at all, I would be like, I'm replacing this thing with one that automatically does it. Cause I'd be like, I would have to accept. Also, if after years go by and I'm told like, hey, for years you haven't done this, I'd be like, then I. Clearly, my brain is not able to do this, so I need to find some other solution for it.

[Ian]

Yeah, that's a good solution.

[Shane]

But a level of anger here.

[Courtney]

But I think you might also be right, Ian. A little bit of, like, the feeling of not feeling like you're being heard or listened to or supported.

[Ian]

It's the feeling behind the action.

[Courtney]

Yeah, exactly. And I can understand her anger in that sense. Do I think you retaliate with a cold also? So he took off his PJs. So he's gonna just hang out.

[Shane]

He's just standing there naked, just waiting.

[Courtney]

Tell me when you're done, babe.

[Shane]

Massive inconvenience now for both of them. She just splashed water all over the bathroom or living or wherever.

[Courtney]

No, I think it was in the bedroom.

[Shane]

Yeah, it's like, all right. Like, her. She wants us to be on her side when she's saying, like, if you can't make my life better, I'm gonna make your life worse. I'm like, that's not. I don't think if you went to a couples therapists, they'd be like, yeah, that's the right mindset.

[Courtney]

Right?

[Shane]

You guys are gonna do all right. Now I'm making things worse. Like, then things are gonna get worse.

[Courtney]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Ian]

Yeah. No, I think it's definitely, like, if she was able to. If she was able to speak to her feelings around that issue of, like, hey, I don't feel. I don't feel Thought about or cared for. Because when you do this thing. Yeah. I feel like you don't care about me and you're not thinking about me. And I think it's better to try to. Yeah. Put those things into feelings and communicate that rather than saying, well, I got assaulted with water, so now I'm gonna assault you with water.

[Courtney]

She's also saying, like, you have adhd, and here are the problems of adhd. It's a little like she's self. She's diagnosing him.

[Shane]

And then. Well, she's saying at the top, she's saying, he doesn't. He's been tested and he doesn't.

[Courtney]

Oh, okay.

[Shane]

But he has the kinds of problems that are associated with it, however, that's.

[Courtney]

Just like the problems with it.

[Shane]

He says. Right. Writing lists, making a schedule, setting alarms is physically painful for him, and he'd rather just deal with the occasional emergencies rather than being proactive.

[Courtney]

So then adapt. That's who your partner is. That's literally. He literally told you who he is. I don't understand why people are like, yeah, but I'm gonna change Em. It's like, you actually. You can work on things together, and eventually maybe you will change each other in a way that works. But like, he's communicating who he is.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah.

[Courtney]

Get a new shower head thing.

[Ian]

I like, I like that. I like that solution. Just get a new shower and then, I don't know, work. I don't think this would be.

[Shane]

I don't think this would be done. I think this is. I think she's clearly saying this is a broad scope of things. Verdict was, you're the asshole. Which we rarely see. And not only that, I think the first time on the show, poo mode activated.

[Courtney]

Yeah, I've never heard of that.

[Ian]

Okay, explain, explain.

[Shane]

I think it's just like an extreme. Like, she was voted, you're the asshole into a blue.

[Courtney]

Who activates the poo?

[Shane]

Just the Reddit community.

[Ian]

Okay. Cause, I mean, I think we've heard stories that are way more asshole than this.

[Shane]

Well, she's not ending up on you're the devil. Right. And she's not a demon. Right.

[Ian]

She's just like.

[Shane]

I'm like, this is extreme asshole behavior.

[Ian]

This is extreme.

[Shane]

Hey, you're being an absolute asshole.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

And she's gonna have to wash off in the shower. After all.

[Shane]

She's not criminal. She's not like, she's not a nightmare human being. It's just like, hey, you're being a horrible asshole. You grabbed cold water and splashed it on your husband.

[Courtney]

I need to know what his reaction was.

[Shane]

I get the vibe. My interpretation. He's the guy who's just like. He's like, oh yeah, sorry, couldn't figure it out. That's what I'm thinking. If we met these people face to face, we might have completely different opinions. But based on how she wrote this, she also suffers from the thing that some ops suffer from where the way she wrote this paints her horribly.

[Courtney]

She was in a rageful place.

[Shane]

You did not write this for us to be on YouTube.

[Courtney]

She wrote it naked right after the water thing.

[Shane]

She might have written this in the shower.

[Courtney]

Oh, she definitely did.

[Shane]

Comments. You're the asshole for nearly 20 years. You could have learned to take two seconds to look at it yourself. This is a you problem, not him. Someone said, I'm honestly scratching my head at getting into the shower before the water goes on. Like, even if it's coming out of the tub faucet, the initial shower water will be cold. Plus, who wants to stand there naked and cold waiting for the water to heat? Someone said, maybe my shower is just shit, but do you really not let it run for a second to warm the water up and stick a toe in to see if it's the right temperature? Sorry, but this seems like it could be a non issue with the modicum of effort on your part. You're the asshole, someone said. Can we consider the possibility that when someone has reached the level of throwing a cup of cold water in their spouse's face, that it's not about the one minor annoyance like the post is pretty clear here. This is not My husband is a caring and supportive member of the household 99% of the time, but has this one blind spot. This is I have spent 20 years turning myself inside out to get this person to make baby steps in pulling his weight and nothing ever gets better. She feels trapped and powerless, so she's behaving like a petty asshole. She should have left long before she got to this point. Op responded, yeah, I think it's time for me to get out. He says all the right things, but he either can't or won't change. I don't like the person I am when I'm around him anymore.

[Ian]

Whoa.

[Shane]

Someone responded to that saying, leaving honestly sounds like a good idea, but don't pull the I don't like the person I am around him card without being willing to take a serious look at your behaviors, your habits, and the attitudes that you have developed. Seriously, write out the statement, my husband annoyed me so I physically attacked him and stare at it for a while. Yes, it was in a way that had no chance whatsoever to hurt him. But the fact that you reached that point over an annoyance and no warning bells went off in your brain to remind you that this isn't how adults handle conflict resolution is a problem, and it's entirely an internal. Whether you want a new partner or single life, you need to confront that behavior head on or it will keep causing issues further down the line.

[Courtney]

There's that therapist. How much are they getting paid hourly?

[Shane]

Show up.

[Courtney]

Like, truly, they're working constantly.

[Shane]

Yeah, there's a ton beyond this. This is a whole plumbing system. There's no therapy thing. No.

[Courtney]

She's like, I've been looking at the scrap of paper that you don't.

[Shane]

She's like, thank you for that novel you sent. I mean, I can't disagree with it, but look, if she's like, I need to get out, then clearly this was a lot going on.

[Ian]

There's something going on, I think, like, yeah, I mean, I read a great book. I'd recommend all couples read this book, Nonviolent Communication. Oh, great book.

[Shane]

Okay, I like to do that already. So that sounds good. Non violent communication, Non violently communicating. You know, I like to communicate not.

[Courtney]

Are you kidding? You berate me. I just scream at you.

[Shane]

The camera's cutting. I'm like, how dare you talk that way in this video?

[Ian]

Yeah, yeehaw. But yeah, great book, Great book.

[Shane]

Okay, great recommend, Great recommend. All right. Wow. That's probably some of the most like, vitriol we've ever read in a Reddit story.

[Courtney]

I literally.

[Shane]

She was on fire.

[Courtney]

I've never seen you swear that much.

[Ian]

Over a 3 inch cup of water.

[Shane]

I know.

[Courtney]

3 inch cup of water.

[Ian]

I do like to imagine that she like, whenever she saw that the nozzle was to the shower, and she like got all the way in the shower and then stood right in the direction of the shower and went, yeah, you fucker.

[Courtney]

Exactly. And he's probably like, yeah, my baby's gonna remember that.

[Ian]

I'm so sorry, baby.

[Courtney]

He's like, scott, you just did that right in the mic.

[Ian]

Oh, I'm sorry, Scott. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Scott.

[Courtney]

Scott's dying.

[Shane]

Scott is dead.

[Courtney]

Yeah.

[Ian]

That was awesome.

[Courtney]

That was.

[Shane]

That was a ride.

[Courtney]

That was a ride. A ride I didn't want to be on Next Story.

[Shane]

Am I the asshole for thinking about divorcing my wife after she drunkenly exposed me to our group of friends?

[Courtney]

Exposed.

[Shane]

Exposed. Okay, guys, I literally don't know what to do after this weekend. Posting from a burner account since I am connected with a lot of friends and family on my account. The issue here happened Saturday night. We had our friend group over. There were six of us couples there and we were hosting at our house. The night was progressing pretty normally. We had done dinner and were just hanging on the couches chatting. Everyone had been drinking over the course of the evening, so we were all pretty comfy. My wife, Amy, all names are fake. Was talking with one of the other girls about my new job. I recently got a promotion that comes with a nice room. The downside is that I have to travel a decent amount, up to two weeks a month, but only three to four days at a time at most. We were excited for the changes, the extra income will provide and how it will change our future. So the travel was something we agreed to be worth it. As they were chatting, her friend Pamela was talking about how they make it work since her husband also travels for work a lot. The conversation was actually quite helpful, honestly, in a lot of ways, as there were some good ideas in there. That is, until this happened. Heidi jokingly said, be sure to order some sex toys that are the same size as him so you can still have sex while he's. Now she was giggling, just making light of the fact that I would be gone and that the biggest challenge they had was the interruption in their sex life. No harm in this, right? That is, until my wife says, I don't think they make them that tiny.

[Ian]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Courtney]

Wait.

[Ian]

No, no, no, wait. No, no, no.

[Shane]

Okay, Please press F for our fallen.

[Courtney]

Whoa, wait.

[Ian]

The wife said this in front of all the friends?

[Shane]

I don't think they make them that tiny.

[Courtney]

Was she just, like, getting. Did she get a little nervous and say something that wasn't right and it's not true?

[Shane]

You'd hope she would quickly go, I'm just kidding.

[Courtney]

I'm just kidding. It's massive. I can't take it anymore.

[Shane]

It's so big that they don't make anything to me.

[Courtney]

I'm done. And he's just like, okay, now you're actually.

[Shane]

It's like a pool noodle.

[Courtney]

It's wild. You girls should try it.

[Shane]

Honestly, he's a freak.

[Courtney]

He's nasty. He's nasty.

[Shane]

Okay.

[Ian]

Like, you ever seen a baby's arm holding an apple.

[Courtney]

Jesus Christ.

[Shane]

Damn it. All right. That is until my wife says, I don't think they make them that tiny, guys. I went totally pale. Everyone stopped talking, and you could just feel the awkwardness in the room. I think she realized what she had said because she tried to bash, but the damage was done. I just stared at her in disbelief. She just kept trying to backpedal and saying, I'm so sorry. I just stood up and walked out. I didn't know what to say or do. I headed over to a buddy's house. I was sober. I don't drink. I didn't tell him the story, just that we had an argument. But I feel so violated by Amy.

[Ian]

Are you okay? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?

[Courtney]

The baby's okay, but that thing is huge.

[Ian]

Sorry. For the listeners. For the listeners at home, something in the backdrop fell and almost killed Amanda.

[Shane]

All right, the sign is back up. Dare to dairy.

[Ian]

Okay, so the downtown Dairy Cows sign just dropped. I hope that's not a bad omen.

[Shane]

That's a bad omen for you.

[Courtney]

It is a bad omen.

[Shane]

It means you guys are gonna lose. And you guys dropped again.

[Ian]

It just dropped again.

[Courtney]

You're not gonna win.

[Ian]

I don't want to do smashable games anymore.

[Shane]

We are removing the downtown Dairy Cow sign because it fell again. And also, you guys lost, so we.

[Ian]

Might as well just keep that up.

[Courtney]

Apparently, you guys lost.

[Shane]

Oh, you said the thing that was so awkward.

[Ian]

Okay, so anyway, back to the story. Guy has a little pee pee.

[Shane]

Okay, we don't know that yet.

[Ian]

Oh, we know.

[Shane]

Okay. But she did say she insulted him horribly. And he did walk out. He left. He left without a word and went to a buddy's house. He did not tell his buddy what happened. Now, the backstory here, what she said is most likely true. I am not endowed at all. I have known this my whole life. Basically, any guy can back me up when I say we are all conscious of our size. I'm just under 3 inches hard. I have always been super insecure about it. But our sex life also was never lacking because I made up for it in other ways in the bedroom. And she has never lacked in the orgasm department. We just get there other ways sometimes. Now here is where I feel like the asshole. I want a divorce. I feel so violated. I feel like I can never see these friends again. I feel like all they will be thinking about when I am around is her comment. But my asshole feeling comes in because I also have known for a long time that it is small. So I steered into the skis, I guess you could say, and am more submissive in the bedroom and enjoy it when she pokes fun at it in the bedroom. But that was just Us. I just feel so violated with it now being public knowledge. But I also may have made my bed here by being okay with the dirty talk. I don't know. And for those are who. Yes, she has called and texted a ton yesterday apologizing for outing me. But I told her I needed space for a bit. Honestly, I don't even know if I'll read the replies. I just needed to vent this somewhere, and I have no one to talk to about it. My buddy I'm staying with just thinks we had a fight. I feel so lost. I feel like an asshole, but just don't know if I can trust her again or feel secure enough to see any of them again.

[Courtney]

Okay, so in the bedroom, they dirty talk about his tiny penis.

[Ian]

Yeah. It's like a humiliation.

[Shane]

Yeah. So she's.

[Courtney]

She's used to saying shit like that.

[Ian]

Yeah, it's like a degradation.

[Courtney]

I'm not. I'm not. Hey, I'm not giving her an excuse.

[Shane]

But you're saying when she was drunk, she might have just, like, slipped into that. But I don't know. That's still bringing, like, a private bedroom thing into a public.

[Courtney]

All of this is so bad. Like, so uncomfortable.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

I just am, like, him walking out, her saying it in front of the friends. I get it. I wouldn't want to return and show my face.

[Ian]

Yeah. I mean, like, I feel like he's reaching a bit when he's like, I don't know if I can be friends with everyone again. Cause all they're gonna think about is my tiny little guy. But it's like, literally, like, if I found that out about my friend, it would just be like, okay, okay. And then we're still friends. Because my relationship to you has nothing to do with your wiener.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

You know, I think it's totally.

[Ian]

I feel.

[Shane]

I mean, so much of what he's saying is true, right? Of, like, the insecurity. And what sucks is, like, it's a private thing. So, like, you have this and you just go, well, I'm the smallest in the world. Cause you're not out and about. Like, we don't all just have our dongs out. So you're not, like, seeing other people.

[Ian]

Who look like you.

[Courtney]

Oh, it's such a bummer. But, like, the thing is, I think what is lacking here is, like, what's gonna be so hot is if he just fucking admits it and owns it and then goes back in there and goes, yeah, yeah, I do have a small penis.

[Shane]

Sorry. Yeah, I got a tiny penis. And it Rots.

[Courtney]

Yeah, exactly. Because she fucking loves it, okay? She's having a great time.

[Ian]

I mean, he says there's no issues in the orgasm, definitely. So he could just come back and be like, yeah, I got it, Tiny Weir.

[Shane]

I changed. You know what?

[Ian]

She still comes.

[Shane]

Whoa. We knew you were gonna say something. I think regardless of all of these things, though, it's like your partner body shamed you in front of all your.

[Courtney]

Friends, and it's very awkward.

[Shane]

And the way that I think it's like, oh, you did this in the bedroom because I asked you to, and we agreed on this. But you saying it to friends comes across like, oh, how do you actually feel about me? Like, I don't even care how drunk you are. I'm like, wait, you're able to say.

[Courtney]

That you say the truth when you're drunk too?

[Shane]

I know. And it's like. But it's just.

[Courtney]

Divorce. Word.

[Shane]

I don't know.

[Ian]

I don't. But I think it's just.

[Shane]

She's so hurt.

[Ian]

It is a disrespect thing for sure.

[Courtney]

Definitely disrespectful.

[Ian]

But I think maybe they were just. I'm not trying to, like, excuse what she said, but I think there were probably some wires crossed there. Cause they were all drinking. She's used to her kind of like the degradation thing they do, and then just, like, let it slip out in public. I think it's just, like.

[Courtney]

It's tricky.

[Ian]

It's very embarrassing. It's embarrassing for both of them, but I think that's something that you could work through.

[Shane]

I think it's really awful. And I think if I was his buddy, I'd be like, well, is this a completely isolated event? And otherwise? But if there is any sort of pattern here, that's. Yeah, but it's really tough.

[Courtney]

Is this an overall thing that he feels he doesn't feel good in the bedroom? Is he just now coming out being like, oh, wait, I actually don't feel that good in the bed? Because it's just kind of the last thing.

[Shane]

Oh, it just makes you question everything now. It's just like, you're now the trust that it hurts your trust, Right? The verdict is not the asshole comments. Nah, man. She doubled down on her statement by saying, I'm so sorry. Letting everyone know it was the truth. Just kidding. He's huge. Would have covered the backpedaling. She acknowledged it as true. And you leaving embarrassed tripled down the statement. Not the asshole. That was deliberate. Someone said she violated your boundaries and humiliated you in front of Your drunk or no, she showed a lack of respect for you and respect is fundamental in a relationship. Whether you try to salvage this or not is up to you. I think that even if you do, you may need to find a new group of friends and that is a big ask. I'm of the mind that the only antidote to public humiliation is public lionization in terms of her respect for you, but that won't change what the old friends heard either way. Not the asshole. Lastly, someone said not the asshole. This is a deep hurt she rendered you in front of your friends thinking what you think, feeling what you feel. Those things never make you an asshole to make you an asshole. So if you do decide this is worthy of divorce, be clear with yourself as to what it will remedy and what it will not. The words in company will never be unsaid. So in terms of how you feel exposed in front of those friends, divorce will not help that. If in all other ways or enough other ways you have been happy in your marriage, then it may help you to get counseling for yourself and possibly yourselves as a couple. She may have been drunk, but she said it. She needs to take responsibility for it and uncover why she would say such a demeaning thing about you. Is there some unhappiness in your marriage that she was paying you back for? This is above Reddit's pay grade to fully resolve. But above all, you are not the asshole and you are enough. You are a man deserving of respect and love from your partner. I hope you find a way through to heal yourself.

[Courtney]

Oh, therapist is back.

[Shane]

Therapist is back.

[Courtney]

Love it.

[Shane]

Update.

[Ian]

Oh shit.

[Courtney]

What?

[Shane]

Long story short, we sat down to talk about everything. I'm going to give bullet points from the conversation because I don't think I could even begin to write out the whole conversation. I brought up how I felt exposed and humiliated by what happened. I explained that it was different from what we do in private. She agreed and understood where I was coming from. She apologized for saying it and admits that she wasn't really thinking about it because of the alcohol. She also told me that she really didn't know because while I may be smaller, I am good at ensuring she is happy. So she hasn't really used any or looked at any of those types of things. I do believe this because we have some things that haven't been used in years. We both agree that unrelated in totality to this issue, she has been drinking too much and I stopped drinking a long time ago for health reasons and she is going to stop for the time being as well. We are both going to start individual counseling and then couples in a few weeks. We have our own issues and things to work on as well as our couple things. There were lots of emotions, tears and some anger at times through the talk. But I think it helped us for now. We move forward. I don't know exactly what I feel, but know that I also have to fix myself and my mind. Not really a conclusive thing, but it is where we are and we feel like we are going to be okay. That. Thanks again.

[Courtney]

Very healthy.

[Shane]

Yeah, that's great.

[Courtney]

I'm really glad that it just didn't end it, you know.

[Shane]

Yeah. I think he wrote that afterwards where he was just really feeling a lot and stuff. So I'm happy for him that they.

[Courtney]

Were always something else though, the drinking.

[Shane]

Yeah, yeah.

[Courtney]

You know.

[Shane]

All right, it's time for our final story. Aw, am I the asshole? I didn't attend my son's wedding. I instead spent the evening with his ex wife. Okay, so what?

[Ian]

Oh, oh, here we go.

[Shane]

Okay. All right, quick backstory. After graduating high school, my son moved three states away for college. At 19, he married a girl he met. I tried convincing him to wait because I personally felt he was too immature. They both dropped out and moved back here to his hometown. At 20, they had their first child, a beautiful little girl. Sixteen months later, my daughter in law gave birth to their second child. A little after the first baby, my wife and I noticed our daughter in law wasn't happy. We both thought it was PPD related. Just after the second arrived, my son and his wife separated. She would bring the kids over for a visit. It was then she began unloading on us. I know there's two sides to every story. But considering I know my son, I believed her. I sat my son down numerous times to speak with him regarding his marriage. He refused to take responsibility, blamed her for everything. Even when I directly pointed out where he was the sole problem. They got into counseling for a year. Things were okay on the surface. Our daughter in law filed for divorce. My son three days later was on Facebook announcing his new girlfriend. A month later, they were engaged. My son had forced his then wife to become a permanent stay at home mom at the birth of their first child. She of course had no other family or friends here. She knew no one aside from us. She had nowhere to go with two small children. Unbeknownst to our son, my wife and I helped her financially and got her answer. Before the divorce was even finalized, we received a wedding invitation. I made it clear to my son I would not be attending and they would not have my blessing. His mother told him she would see to it that I would attend. I stayed consistent in my decision. I also asked him not to bring his fiance around our house out of respect for the mother of his children. The wedding happened on February 11th. The night before. My wife gave me the final push. I did not attend. Our daughter also did not attend for the same reasons. My wife picked up our grandkids, got them dressed, and attended the wedding. My daughter and I decided to spend the evening with him. I couldn't imagine her sitting alone while her kids attended their father's wedding. She was taken aback that I didn't end up attending his wedding. We took her out to distract her mind. I just wanted her to know she'll always be considered family to us. My daughter also made a joke that they can drop the in law status and just be sisters now. She was very tearfully grateful. I realized just how badly she needed our support and specifically on that night. The next morning, my son called to tell me how much of a horrible father I am for not attending. A few days later, he caught wind that I spent the wedding evening with his ex. He said that was the ultimate form of betrayal. And further, myself and his sister would have to earn a relationship with him on his terms only.

[Ian]

Wowee.

[Shane]

Whoa.

[Courtney]

The father sounds like a sweet, sweet man.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

And I understand where he's at. He's trying to protect his grandchildren. He's trying to protect that relationship.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And like, his son is such a mess.

[Courtney]

I mean, to. Yeah. Wow. He moves fast.

[Ian]

And like, we were a wee bit impulsive.

[Shane]

They did not give us the details on where his son is solely in the wrong. They just said, like, we believe that he is solely in the wrong. I'm like, for the parents to quickly be like, he's in the wrong. And we are completely on our extra side. It's like, what is going on?

[Courtney]

That's why it's hard to comment on.

[Shane]

All right, so there's some comments. Okay. Info. What were the circumstances of the divorce? Did your son cheat, abuse her, et cetera? I agree that it isn't great how he's abandoning her and his children, but what happened? OP responds. It was mostly about control. She was blonde when they married. When they moved here, she was brunette. After the kids, she wanted to go blonde again, but he told her no. She gained weight after having the babies. He was mad at her for not trying harder to lose it. As he said he didn't Marry a fat woman. He wouldn't let her leave the house. She basically had to give her a daily schedule of what she was doing and where she was going. He wouldn't allow her to make friends. She wanted to get a little part time job after the baby was born. He told her she wasn't allowed to do that. It was basically a marriage where he created rules for her to follow. But he could do whatever he wanted. He wouldn't help with the kids, meals or housework. He made her do it all, even through both pregnancies. I'm embarrassed he's my son. I'm just thankful she doesn't judge me for the way he is. I thought going off to college would make him mature. I didn't expect him to marry so quickly. Oh, so your husband's the devil.

[Ian]

It's like textbook. It's like textbook abuser stuff.

[Courtney]

And also it kind of makes sense because he goes, now you have to have a relationship with me on my terms. Like he kind of does everything with control. Ew.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Someone else said, so he was cheating and married the girl he cheated on his ex wife with? Hell the fuck no. Not the asshole. Opie said he swore he wasn't cheating. I'm sorry, but if my marriage fails. Well, it hasn't. But I would do everything I could to prevent that. But I sure as hell wouldn't be calling 1-800- especially-with kids involved. There's so many reasons I couldn't attend his wedding. I felt like it was a huge slap in his young children's face. He provided them an unstable household. Then overnight daddy has a new stepmommy for you. He was without a doubt cheating his ex. Knew it. I had even asked if there was someone else, but he swore there wasn't.

[Courtney]

It's very abusive also to not let your partner have friends.

[Shane]

Oh my God.

[Courtney]

That's like the textbook an abusive relationship.

[Ian]

Dictating their appearance.

[Courtney]

No partner should always ever tell you how you should wear your hair.

[Shane]

Oh my God.

[Ian]

No, no, no, no. That's. Come on. It's an immediate red flag.

[Courtney]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Someone said, don't think you'll regret this anytime soon. You did the right thing. You all know this new marriage is going to be a dumpster fire too, right? Not the asshole. Your daughter in law is lucky to have you. Op said yes, I can hope it'll work out. But I know the odds are horribly against a successful long term marriage. After his engagement Take two. I messaged him and told him he should slow seek some counseling and work on himself before jumping too fast into another relationship. He won't listen to a single thing I have to say. I'm 47 and I've been with one woman my entire life. His mother. We're not perfect, but I must be doing something right. I can't imagine jumping from relationship to relationship, especially while kids are involved. My wife and I have had some boo boos, but we always work things out. And neither of us ever thought about cheating or even separating. This is wild. I mean, this is like, you know, he sounds so different from his parents.

[Courtney]

But the sister is against him as well.

[Ian]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

And the sister's like. And that's showing me more things too.

[Shane]

Like, this just feels.

[Ian]

This feels odd. It's. Yeah.

[Shane]

Update. First, I'd like to sincerely thank each and every one of you for your support, encouragement, and all the awards. I know without a doubt I did the right thing. I even feel differently now. His mother should not have attended either, but we can't go back and undo. So my son saw the post. I had sent my daughter the link yesterday so she could read the comments. This morning she texted me at work, dad, you went viral. Lol. But anyways, he sent screenshots of the post and all my comments to his mom. He also told her, he's dead to me now. Time will tell if he means that. I'm sure he'll see this update too. For that reason, I'm positively certain the second he needs another cash loan, I won't be dead anymore. His mom told him, your children have to be our number one priority. They're not just some disposable items you can leave behind when one chapter of your life comes. Maybe one day he'll understand this. So, okay, so Op is the dad and he's saying his wife is still supporting the son. Yeah, she brought the kids to his wedding. Yeah. So they're not in full agreement, but.

[Courtney]

It sounds like the mom also said.

[Shane]

To the son that the children are the priority.

[Ian]

Yeah, it sounds to me like she's trying to be the peacekeeper.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Ian]

You know, she doesn't want to lose her son.

[Shane]

It's so different from what we usually see on Reddit. And agreed that they're supporting the ex wife who dealt with the victim in all of this.

[Ian]

I mean, I think they feel some form of responsibility since they are their grandchildren.

[Courtney]

Yeah, I think it's great. I think it's really great that they are taking that side and kind of supporting her because it sounds like she doesn't have any support.

[Shane]

Yeah, well, rough yeah, can't wait. Absolutely. That was some betrayal.

[Ian]

Betrayal.

[Courtney]

That was intense.

[Shane]

Just like Summer Games, dude. Yeah.

[Ian]

You love us. There was some serious betrayal. Somebody rigged that sign to fall. I just know.

[Shane]

No, that's so.

[Ian]

No. Somebody at the Hollywood Hot Dogs came in here to try to stir some shit with the downtown dairy cows because they can't handle losing to us.

[Shane]

Isn't it. Isn't it weird? I'm just thinking about this. Isn't it weird that this is all Summer Games is ending on a video where we don't know what's about to happen? It's like full circle.

[Courtney]

Full circle.

[Shane]

We're back here, but we're seeing the signs. That's all gonna make sense.

[Courtney]

The signs.

[Shane]

We don't have the context yet for that. Yeah, but it's gonna make sense.

[Courtney]

And someone's in that locker. Let him out.

[Shane]

Tommy. Tommy, come on up. And he's just like.

[Courtney]

Wow, that betrayal story.

[Shane]

Yeah. Well, thank you both for being here.

[Ian]

This was great.

[Courtney]

This is forever changed.

[Ian]

This is a rough one.

[Shane]

Yeah, well.

[Courtney]

Wow.

[Shane]

Anyways, I hope you guys watched Summer Games, and if not, please check it out. It was a blast. I'm sure. And of course, we'll see you next Saturday. Goodbye.

[Courtney]

Bye. Bye.