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Narrator/Advertiser
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Shane
CarGurus Discover, you can skip the filters and describe what you're looking for in your own words. Simply type what you want and Cargurus Discover instantly surfaces real listings that match your exact needs. It's no wonder CarGurus is the 1 most visited car shopping site according to SimilarWeb's estimated traffic data. Buy or sell your next car today with CarGurus@CarGurus.com Go to CarGurus.com to make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's C A R G u r u s.cargurus.com hello and welcome to Smosh Reads Reddit Stories. I'm Shane, and today is a very special Valentine's Day episode. It's extra long, so enjoy that. And I'm joined by two people who love Valentine's Day, Courtney and Angela. I don't know if that was true or not. I just said it.
Courtney
Get your sweet tarts out.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Nice.
Angela
It's your Valentine's Day pancakes and dildos out.
Shane
Whoops. We knew it was gonna happen.
Angela
We're taking it back. I'm gonna say something else so we don't get to balance it. Get your pancakes and vibrators out. Here we go.
Courtney
Here we go.
Angela
Get your pancake and tinder out. It's Valentine's Day.
Shane
I wonder which take they used.
Courtney
Get your pancakes and condoms out.
Shane
Woo. Nice.
Angela
Get your pancakes and Intentional conversations out.
Shane
Whoa.
Courtney
Get your pancakes and your dental dam out. Whoa.
Shane
Damn.
Angela
Get your pancakes and it's not me, it's you.
Shane
Out. Oh, wow. Do you have 110 options?
Courtney
Do you like Valentine's Day?
Angela
Depends on the year. I like it, though, because it's like, you know. How sweet. What a Friday. Feels like a Friday.
Shane
Okay.
Courtney
It does feel like a Friday.
Angela
Well, look at that. Luke wore pink. All right.
Shane
See y'?
Angela
All.
Shane
That's what it is.
Courtney
I love that. I love it.
Angela
You love it.
Courtney
I used to love it as a kid when everybody would give you candy and you just had so much candy.
Angela
Yeah.
Courtney
And I wish people seized the day. More of Valentine's. I wish secret admirers would do their thing. I think people should bring that back as a reason. Sometimes people just need a reason. We're making this episode extra long so that you can have sex 100 times.
Angela
Whoa.
Courtney
During the video. Whoa.
Angela
If you have sex during Smosh Read's Reddit stories, please put yourself in the comments. Say I am the silent majority.
Shane
Do we want to get into some of these stories?
Courtney
We must.
Angela
We must. You said I must.
Courtney
Tis the season.
Shane
Okay, let's hop into these stories. First one. Ooh, this is an old school one. This is from 11 years ago. 111111 November 30, 2014 this was posted in the relationship subreddit. I, a 27 year old man, am concerned that my semi girlfriend 23 of a couple of months is with me for my celebrity status. I've worried about this in the past. This is obviously a throwaway for a good reason. Without going into much detail. I am an actor on a sitcom and have been for a few years. I I am a supporting actor and most of you would not know my name, but many would be familiar with my character. I'm certainly far from a big deal. I am not famous enough to be followed by paparazzi thankfully, but am recognized regularly on the streets. I do fine financially, but I'm not Brad Pitt. I wish. Exclamation mark. And I don't live a very high profile celebrity lifestyle. I'm happy just staying in on the weekend. I recently met someone at a coffee shop. I sat next to her and we started chatting. She was down to earth and when she asked what I did, I told her I did some acting. Nothing uncommon around these. She didn't seem to recognize me and I didn't go into more detail. I got her number and we texted a few times. Then we met for lunch and she said something that made it clear she recognized me. We've hung out since then several times. She wanted to introduce me to one of her friends, who is a killer fan of the show. That made me nervous. Apparently she is just a big fan. I didn't really like to be paraded in that way, but it was fine. That's part of my job to some extent. The thing that is getting to me is that she often refers to me as though I am my character. For example, I might say something sarcastic and she'll say, okay, character name. I'm not on Facebook, but one of my friends is and he friended her. He showed me her page and she wrote a few months ago, oh my God, I met my name. I think he is into me. Celebgirlfriend. Whoa.
Courtney
Okay, okay. It's all laid out there.
Angela
Okay, look at the hashtag.
Shane
Use of hashtags on Facebook aside, it started making me think she was into me for my character or to show off and not into me. This is obviously a problem. In my life. I have dated two actresses, neither of who are all that famous. Both had their sights on bigger things. I know for a fact that at least one was using me as a way to get her name out there. It worked. I'm very happy for her. Otherwise, I am attracted to students, bartenders, baristas, etc. I tend to date around rarely in serious relationships because I am concerned that they don't like me. For me, they are. I play a very extroverted, confident character, but that isn't me in real life. My self esteem is fine, but I guess I'm a bit paranoid. I feel like this girl likes me, but would she if I wasn't a minor celebrity? Is there some way to know? Am I doomed to dating within the industry? Do most people realize that who we are as characters is not really how we are as people? Any advice is appreciated. Oh, and yes, I am a regular Redditor. I lurk on this sub a lot. And I appreciate the advice of those not in the industry. Thank you.
Courtney
Dang.
Shane
Well, okay.
Courtney
2014. A well known Tom side character. I'm so curious who it is.
Angela
I was having fun picturing it as. What's his name? George Costanza.
Shane
Fully George Costanza. Listen, Jason Alexander is writing it. Like. Yeah, I think.
Angela
I think she's dating me for this. Oh my God. I'm dating George Costanza.
Courtney
My initial thought was Gunther from Friends.
Angela
Whoa.
Shane
Funny.
Courtney
But this is. I mean, there's not even a question. Of course she's posting on Facebook about it.
Angela
You saw the proof theory?
Courtney
Yeah, I think I was thinking about that too. But there's no extroverted Side character that I can think of.
Angela
Can you look up the top sitcom in 2014, please?
Shane
I think there's. It's not just that he's an actor. Right. I think seeing a Facebook post from when you first started dating someone and their posting publicly about you in some way and like putting your name out there, it's uncomfortable. Right.
Angela
I mean, this person is using them because of the Facebook.
Shane
Totally.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
But like on the larger scale, talking about their dating life, that does suck.
Shane
Yeah. Yeah.
Courtney
And like to be when you're speaking and that person going, okay. And then calling you a character you played is like so parasocial and strange really, to. You're just not treating them like a person, you're treating them like a character.
Angela
And that's.
Shane
Yeah, I think that's a little ridiculous. I mean, I would have told this to this guy in 2014. It's the same now. Is like he just happens to be dating the wrong person.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Cause I'm like, I've lived in LA for a long time. I've been in the industry a long time. So many of my friends are in the industry. There are tons of non industry people who really don't care.
Angela
Like tons.
Courtney
Yeah, tons.
Shane
Countless.
Courtney
It's a big city.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
It feels like. Yeah. Once my friend went to a bar. I will never forget this. It was like my best friend and we were hanging out and then she was like dancing with some guy and I was over there and I was like, oh my God, they're hitting it off. And then she was like, they started asking each other what they do. And he was like, I'm in a band. And she asked what band? And he went, do you mind if I just get to know you first a little bit? And then she came and told me that. And then they kept dancing and then we left. And I always wanted to know, oh.
Courtney
My God, imagine if it was like Paramore or something.
Angela
Like literally. I think you only say like, do you mind if I get to know you a little bit more Before?
Narrator/Advertiser
Yeah.
Shane
It's a tricky thing. I think it's something that transcends just our industry now, though, with the Internet. Cause there's tons of people who are big online all over the world now, so it's just a thing, but it's a matter of finding someone. I get that you don't want to.
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Shane
Be dating someone who's into you solely because of something like that.
Courtney
Yeah, it just puts you on edge. That kind of stuff can put you on edge. And if you're not feeling safe, yeah, even it's not like this person isn't a threat. But when you feel like you're being perceived as your profession, even in your home and in settings where you're wanting to be private, that just isn't a safe.
Angela
I feel like this person, it sounds like it's happened to them a couple times, but I feel like the more they date, the more they'll be able to look out for the signs. Like I just watched a four hour Billy Joel documentary and he has four wives, he's had four marriages. And his last marriage that he's with now, he like on their first date started playing piano for her and she didn't give a shit. And he really liked that. And then they got, they like started to fall in love over their love for motorcycles and other things. And he was like, that was the first time. I was kind of like, I'm gonna follow that. Cause I've never followed that before. Where it's like following the signs of connection that aren't based off of your success, but based off of something you enjoy.
Shane
Well. Cause your job. And it's so many things, right? Your job, your looks, even to some degree, like your skills. Those are all, like, external things. And if those are the only thing that the person you're seeing is into, you're like, well, that's the truth. What if I don't have that? Yeah, there's a possible future where I don't have that.
Angela
Totally.
Shane
Or what if I can't play the piano anymore? What if as I get older, my looks fade? What if, like, what? What if my career goes downhill? And so it's like, oh, is the attraction only built on that?
Angela
And what's something not about me, but about something we could share together?
Shane
Exactly.
Angela
Because then there's a power dynamic there. But if we're both just like, we love anime. How fun. And we can connect on that.
Narrator/Advertiser
How fun.
Shane
Totally.
Angela
How fun.
Shane
Angela loves anime.
Angela
Totally. I'm obsessed.
Shane
So I think this is extremely valid. And she's painted it very clearly for him.
Angela
Yeah.
Courtney
I mean, posting on Facebook immediately and, you know, maybe there are certain circumstances where maybe it started that way for her, and then she's like, oh, my go. I'm actually getting to know this person beyond that.
Shane
True.
Angela
And I know it's 2014, but I don't trust people who use hashtags on Facebook. Mm. Yeah, no one's really looking at that, huh?
Shane
Comments? I live in West Hollywood, so I have seen a lot of this. I think the key is time. Simply getting to know her better and her getting to know you better. If she is in the industry and using you, you are already learning how to recognize this. But if she is not in the industry and just a little dazzled and excited, I wouldn't take this as a death blow. She's young, and our culture has become really obsessed by this sort of thing. As she gets to know you, it will gradually become obvious whether she likes the real you or not. What you are asking for, if you think about it, is what we all want. A guarantee. Does she or he really like me? Or just my looks, my money, my status, the fantasy in the. In his or her head. You don't have to be a celebrity to worry if the person you are with is really seeing you. Clearly, we all struggle with this. Your situation just has a more easily identifiable element to it. But this is why celebrities hook up with celebrities and expatriates with other expatriates. Thank you pretzel millionaires marrying other millionaires. You try to find someone whose life cancels out the extraneous factors. I can see why, but it doesn't really address the ultimate problem we all face. Does the person I am with really see me? And to add to that, we seldom show our real selves because we are convinced deep down that we aren't all that lovable. Lol. So dating becomes a test. I'll hide who I am and you come and find me.
Angela
I love this commenter going, you don't need to be famous for this to be relatable.
Shane
No, everybody deals with this. Also, I live in West Hollywood. Someone said, just admit it, you're Al from Home Improvement.
Courtney
Oh my God.
Angela
I was thinking like according to Jim or Home Improvement.
Shane
Op said, lol. I'm more like the guy behind the fence. Okay, so that's the level.
Courtney
So I am right on like a gunther. Yeah.
Shane
Someone said as a non famous Redditor, this is somewhat outside of my wheelhouse, but I don't really think this is totally unique to the show business world. Personally, as a lawyer just starting out and not rich notable by any means, but still, I definitely get the feeling that women are interested in me for the wrong slash tag financial status reasons sometimes. I haven't really figured out how to deal with it either. But I'd say you should trust your instincts if you think she's using you. Otherwise I am attracted to students, bartenders, baristas, etc. That said, I think this is the problem. Really. The these are probably the last types of people you want to date. You need to find someone who is more established in a legit career so you're more or less equals and who isn't interested in ingratiating herself in the world of showbiz.
Angela
Okay, this makes me think I liked hearing it from the other perspective. Like thinking about it that's not an actor, makes it less fame focused and now makes me think of like my inherent stereotypes about people. Like I have had crushes on three different painters because for some reason I think they're so cool and that's the same thing that this person's doing but being like interesting. But is there a job like a lawyer that you would be like whoa, this person inherently cool and it's actually just a stereotype you have.
Courtney
Yeah, I mean I love, I think doctors. The doctors in my life are awesome and I just like they. Cause they see so much shit all the time and they just know so much.
Angela
Yeah, but.
Courtney
Yeah, but even them I'M like, I'm sure they deal. We know people. We know doctors who it's like people come up and they're like, I got a mole on my back. Can you look at it right now? Even though you're homework, taking care of your kids? Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shane
OP responded to that saying, I saw someone else just wrote that I date down. I understand that, but not too many years ago, I was a student and barista. I grew up in a small town. I think being a lawyer is something you earned through your education, et cetera. I don't know what my equals would be as I don't want to date anyone in the entertainment industry. She is going to graduate in May in engineering, if that matters. These are just the people I've been attracted to. I've dated professionals as well, but I keep coming back to the person I meet at quiet places. You've given me something to consider. However. Yeah, I don't know if I fully agree with that of like, oh, you shouldn't date baristas, bartenders, especially as an actor. Because as an actor, you'll have a job and then you won't have a job and then you are back to being a barista.
Courtney
Like, and if people don't know you, they don't view you as that. You know, it's not like you are inherently that. Like, we've met people in our lives before when the dynamic is set based on how you acknowledge the like situation. Like, whereas she came in as being like, I'm a fan. I do this. Oh my gosh, I'm a fan. Creates that now dynamic that didn't have to be there before. Yeah, it puts OP on a pedestal, which is uncomfortable, I think.
Shane
Also, he clearly is not someone who views someone's career as who they are, and so he needs to find someone who views it the same way. And he's worried she doesn't because she's making it very clear she doesn't Update oh, I am. I am Jim Parsons. I'm Michael Scott. Your kindness and sage advice was overwhelming, and I apologize for not commenting more in that thread. I did, however, read all of the comments. I also apologize if I did not respond to the many private messages I received. Several wanted to know who I was. Sorry. Some wanted to know about other famous people on Reddit, probably quite a few. And I especially appreciated the messages from those of you who have been in similar positions. Same with comments to that effect. Anyway, after thinking and reading, I decided that maybe I was blowing the situation out of proportion. But also that I needed to be honest about my feelings. She and I talked for a long time. I more or less told her everything that I said here. I debated about just showing her the post but decided against it. It was a great conversation and brought us much closer together. I'm happy to say that this conversation also led to the exclusivity talk. We are officially a couple now.
Angela
Oh.
Shane
A few things.
Courtney
Didn't see that coming.
Shane
She apologized about the Facebook post but also explained it. She said that she assumed I was just a womanizing celebrity who got numbers just for the sake of doing so. The celeb girlfriend thing was sarcasm as she figured I would never contact her. I did laugh at her use of hashtags on Facebook. She admitted to me that it was a bit overwhelming for a while because she figured I would just date within the industry. I guess she also googled me and saw who I have dated in the past. I assured her I don't make comparisons like that. She told me that the shock of things has worn off and now she just sees me as a person. She did joke about the character thing and she said that she could never date the character I play. When she brings it up, it is just some gentle ribbing that made me feel kind of silly. She said what many of you said me being in a sitcom is who I am. She can't just ignore that. But she said she is much more excited about the production work than any of the acting. She wants to know how things work. Me being an actor to her is not all that different from anything else, but she warned me that many of her friends might see it differently. Some already want to know if I'll introduce them to celebrities I've never met and probably will never meet. If I did, I'd probably be in shock. When they realize how little of a deal I am, then I think we can easily blend our friend groups and whatnot. A couple of you mentioned dating down, etc. She also informed me that she has two job offers for when she graduates at large firms. One is here and the other is in Portland. As of right now, her plan is to stay here and I factor into that I am not looking at her as the person I am going to marry. I could she be, yes. Then again, so could a lot of people in my past and my future. Instead, I'm going to enjoy the ride. She was mature and did a lot to assuage my concerns. She even told me she thought I was using her for access to the university's library. Ha. She's beautiful. And so it seems she does like me for me. Who knows where this will lead? But I sincerely appreciate all the comments. They helped me to organize my thoughts and just say to hell with it and actually talk to her.
Courtney
Nice.
Shane
I'm n and I am.
Angela
Her story's like, I don't want people to judge me for who I am. And I'm like, who isn't?
Shane
And I am the dog with a blog.
Courtney
Well, I'm glad it worked out. It was kind of what I was hoping.
Shane
No?
Courtney
Yeah, she chilled out.
Shane
Yeah.
Courtney
I do think the ribbing. I'm still like, I would. I'd be like, hey, do something else.
Shane
Yeah, but stop that.
Courtney
Just do something else.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
All right, our next story. This comes from. Am I overreacting? And we're back to current times.
Courtney
We're back to current times.
Shane
This was posted in 2025.
Angela
We're back.
Shane
We're off of Facebook July of 2025. Oh boy.
Angela
What's it say?
Shane
All right.
Narrator/Advertiser
What's it say?
Shane
All right. Those stories were chill. Now it's time to start getting into it.
Courtney
Okay.
Angela
Uh oh.
Shane
Am I overreacting? One of my partners keeps trying to make me lactate.
Courtney
So many questions.
Shane
So Recently I, a 19 year old woman, have run into an issue with my partner, a 20 year old man. While cuddling and other things, he starts sucking and rubbing my nipples. At first I thought it was a one time normal sexual thing, but. But he kept doing it for a couple days. Then things turned interesting when he started playing baby crying sounds while he was doing it. I asked him why and he said because I want to save money since I drink so much milk. He goes to the gym and is anal about his protein. Somehow I doubt this is the only reason as he is obviously into my breasts. I told him to stop playing the baby audio noises, but now he wahs like a baby trying to simulate lactation. I told him to stop doing it. I told him to stop doing it because men can lactate and I'd rather he does it himself. He got angry and said it was easier for women and that I wasn't being frugal and that prices were high enough.
Courtney
Oh my God.
Angela
I'm so happy we're together for this story.
Shane
Am I overreacting?
Angela
I'm so happy we're together.
Shane
Edit he also bought me lactation crackers from Target.
Courtney
Lactation crackers.
Angela
What a gentleman, eh?
Courtney
What? We are not a vending machine.
Angela
And it's not only just for milk, it's for fucking protein.
Courtney
Hustle.
Angela
Milk, huh? He wants to build up tiny little piece of shit.
Courtney
Oh my God. He's like, come on, give it up.
Angela
Like, oh, sorry, babe. It's expensive. Wait. What? Could you imagine? Wait, is he playing like baby sounds like on his phone?
Shane
Yeah, he was playing audio of baby sounds.
Angela
What a fucking scary guy.
Courtney
She's 19.
Angela
Hey, Siri, pull up. Baby's crying.
Courtney
Time for sexy time with my girlfriend.
Angela
Oh, could you imagine making out with somebody and they're playing baby's crying so they can save money on protein.
Courtney
That is so fucking weird.
Shane
Yeah, not much else to say.
Courtney
Source too now. Oh, my God.
Angela
This guy's a character, huh?
Shane
Yeah, he really is. Well, verdict? Not overreacting comments. The amount of ews that came out of my mouth before reading the whole post. Sorry, I shouldn't have laughed, but it's rather weird. Breastplay during sex isn't unusual. However, turning it into a feeding baby situation is strange. I feel like he's using the cost of milk as an excuse because why would he be making baby sounds otherwise? Also, what does he think you are, a cow? This is just icky. I don't know what else to say. Has he shown other weird behaviors in the past suggesting he is into kinky stuff like this, but you just didn't pick up on it. Someone else said this is a known bodybuilder thing. There's a misguided belief that the trace amounts of human growth hormone help with gaining muscle, but it's not true. Either that or it's a fetish. Neither is.
Angela
Okay, dude, just bulk up on your own. I don't know how to explain it.
Courtney
Eat some parmesan.
Shane
Op responded. That makes sense. He takes a bunch of supplements like ashwagandha, creatine and a bunch of other stuff. The other stuff being steroids and meth. Jesus is rich. Someone said, dude, it's gross behavior without discussing it first. And not only did you not consent to this kink of his, you told him to stop and he's still doing it. That's not okay now. Not in the slightest. I would be sitting him down in a serious fashion. Not while in the moment of being intimate or him trying to initiate and tell him he needs to cut it out or he will be cut out. It's not all right to impose kinks on someone when they explicitly tell someone to stop. Yes.
Angela
Also just.
Courtney
Yeah. It's so creepy that in the beginning he just started trying that without talking to her about it.
Angela
Literally.
Courtney
She's the Coke machine at the amc. Like I'm blown away by this.
Shane
Yeah, he's at the movie theater, like, pressing all the buttons.
Angela
He's like, can I get Glinda Sprite out of here? Which, not that good, by the way. Pink Sprite. I thought it would change my life.
Narrator/Advertiser
It didn't.
Shane
Okay. Can you make a wicked margarita? Okay. Lastly, someone said, how many partners do you have? Maybe you just don't need this one. Yeah, lower the roster. Just because you eat the cookies doesn't mean you automatically lactate. What the fuck? OP responded 3. But he is my nesting partner. Producer note. A nesting partner is someone you live with, sharing a home and daily life. Common in polyamorous or ethical non monogamy relationships. So likely living with this person, according to Op. I agree.
Courtney
If this is insane, they're gonna use your body on an insane level. That is not okay. Up to them, ever.
Shane
Massive red flag.
Angela
Massive.
Shane
Past the red flag. It's the thing.
Angela
And just because they're your nesting partner doesn't give them a free get out of jail free card for doing stuff without your permission or consent. No, No, I don't care.
Shane
All right, let's please move on.
Courtney
That's the end of it. There's no update.
Shane
No update.
Courtney
Okay, well, here's my update for you, girl. Run.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
Run. Update. She ran.
Shane
Yeah.
Courtney
Update. She ran. That's in my. She ran.
Angela
Update. She ran.
Shane
Our next story comes from True off my chest. This was posted in October of 2022. This is a 31 year old woman. My husband, who's 33 of 4 years, has a weird relationship with his pregnant coworker, 23 year old woman. I'm not sure if I should be worried or not. It already sounds like you should be.
Courtney
Yeah.
Shane
My husband has worked with Kelsey for the last two years, and I never thought anything about their relationship was strange until now. For the past five months, the amount of time that has lapsed since my husband found out that Kelsey was pregnant. He has gone out of his way to support her in a way that makes me uncomfortable. I might be able to understand his actions if they weren't so extreme. But they mostly strike me as downright strange and out of character for him. For one, when he found out she was pregnant, he came to me and asked if he could give her $1,000 to help her with some of her expenses. He said that Kelsey's baby's father was. Was out of the picture and she was struggling. I don't know Kelsey personally, but I can sympathize with her situation. I agreed to let him Write her a check for $250. I did think this was odd though, because my husband has never been all that charitable. I've never known him to be the type of person that goes out of his way to help a coworker or a stranger, but whatever. A few weeks later, my husband came to me and asked again if we could help Kelsey out. This time he wanted to buy a pram for Kelsey. The one he had picked out was quite expensive, so I wasn't comfortable with just giving him the okay. We spent about a week discussing it before we finally agreed to purchase a cheaper one for her. This came after he asked her if the second one would be okay. I took this opportunity to ask him how much more money he wanted to spend on Kelsey and her baby. We had already spent $500 on them at this point and I was starting to get concerned. We had a fight about this where he accused me of being selfish. He said that he was trying to do a good deed for someone and and that he thought I would be happy to support a young mother to be like Kelsey and her baby. I did feel a little guilty afterwards, so I backed off. Fast forward to last week. I found out after the fact that my husband had bought a $150 gift card to baby Zara for Kelsey as a Christmas present. We had another fight about how much money he's spending on her and her baby. And again, he accused me of being stingy. I asked him how much more he planned to spend and he told me that he didn't know. I asked him if he could see how this situation could make me uncomfortable and how it might lead to me thinking something was going on between them. He said that he was disappointed that I would think his good deed was anything other than him trying to help a coworker. He has been giving me the silent treatment since that fight and making passive aggressive comments, which is frustrating. I can't get him to understand that my concerns are legitimate. Besides, it's not like we have the ability to keep spending this kind of money on Kelsey. And in addition to spending the money, my husband also has spent a lot of time helping Kelsey in other ways. He spent time fixing up things around her apartment before the baby comes and doing other odd jobs for her like kissing her. Yeah, all of this makes me extremely uncomfortable. But anytime I bring it up, he accuses me of trying to stop him from helping someone in need of assistance or being greedy. He won't acknowledge what I think is very worrisome behavior. At this point, I Wonder what I'm supposed to do. I. I think he really is trying to do a good deed. But part of me worries that something else is happening. I don't want to believe he would cheat on me. He's never given me a reason to suspect this. But I can't help but wonder sometimes. Especially when he's gone with Kelsey to her OBGYN appointment. On two occasions, though he claimed it was because she needed a ride. Does he have a point? Am I being selfish for hassling him over helping Kelsey? How should I try to get him to understand his behavior? He is making me uncomfortable. I'm not sure how I should handle this situation. Nothing seems to be working.
Courtney
Ma', am, you gotta talk to Kelsey.
Angela
This is her husband. They're married.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
Yeah.
Courtney
Oh, my God, this is rough.
Shane
This is real rough.
Angela
Is there a world in which he thinks he's, like, getting away with this?
Shane
The audacity of some people who do.
Angela
Shit because he's the father.
Courtney
He's clearly the father. The fact that Kelsey is agreeing to him coming over, agreeing to all these things. Cause like, if I was a pregnant person who had somebody wanting to help, who wasn't the father, who was a co worker, I'd be like, this isn't appropriate.
Angela
Yeah. Or they're in love. He's not the father, but they're recently in love. Like, there's no way that's such an intimate place to be at the obgyn. That's not like, let me help her carry her groceries up the stairs. This is like, let's go get her vagina checked.
Courtney
Getting the pram is a big, big gift that comes from people in close proximity to the person who's pregnant. Like, the pram's a big one.
Shane
He's helping out around her apartment and.
Courtney
Going to ob GYN appointments. That's his kid.
Shane
It appears so.
Courtney
And guilt tripping her for being concerned because, like, you know, money like that, it kind of.
Angela
You want.
Courtney
It needs to be a group decision, a team decision, supporting another person. Like, is OP looking to have a child one day? We don't know, but it's like, that's a lot of money going to someone that she doesn't know and gaslighting your.
Angela
Partner when they're like, I don't wanna spend all that money on that. And they're like, well, you're being stingy is what I heard.
Courtney
That's kind of wild.
Angela
It's also like, they give the money to an orphanage. Other people.
Courtney
Yeah, literally.
Shane
I was gonna say based on her writing this and posting this post, this is clearly not like, typical behavior from him. Right. If he was the type who's always like, oh, my gosh, I wanna give to this person. I wanna help these people out. Let's Vol. Suddenly, out of nowhere, he's like, no, I want to give thousands of dollars to this person. Dedicate tons of time. And you're selfish for not thinking we should do that. Like, this is out of nowhere from him. It seems there are people who I feel like it would be in line with behavior to be like, oh, they go out of their way for everyone. But she's not making that seem like that's the case. And it is a very weird, specific case where it's like, he should recognize, like, hey, oh, this would clearly be uncomfortable not only for my wife, but possibly the co worker too.
Angela
Or, like, is there any part of him that's like, this is gonna give my wife the idea that I may be the father? Like, come on, I'm acting like the father. I'm supporting the child. Is any part of her gonna worry that I fucked her?
Shane
His response to her is what gives me the most suspicion.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
The way that people who cheat, like, guilt trip their partners is usually the biggest sign.
Angela
I'll be shocked if he's not the father.
Courtney
And that Kelsey. The fact that Kelsey is accepting all of this tells. It kind of furthers my assumption. Yeah, she's okay with it because it's.
Shane
One of those where if we get an update, I feel like she's gonna be like, oh, yeah, and this one time he did this. And of course, yeah, he did cheat on me in the past. Like, it always leads to that.
Courtney
She's not saying that in this one. I think she needs to talk to Kelsey.
Angela
Is he the father? Reddit.
Shane
Well, we have comments.
Angela
Okay.
Shane
And they write, sounds like she's pregnant with his child. To be honest, OP said it does seem like that could be true. The only thing is, he's never given me reason to suspect him of cheating. No late nights at work, no business.
Angela
Trips, no just going to the OB gyn.
Shane
Just everything I wrote down.
Angela
Not like sexy stuff, just like, father of the child stuff.
Shane
Someone said, that's his baby. Someone said, does Kelsey even know you exist? She's definitely pregnant with your husband's child. The only questions are, has he been lying to her about his marital status? And are you going to make him truthful when he tells women 10 plus years younger than him he's single? Opie said, I don't know. I Always assumed she knew I existed. Oh, boy.
Angela
Okay.
Shane
Update.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Since many of you asked for an update and you were kind enough to offer advice, I have decided to give one. The first thing I did after making my initial post was to confront my husband directly again. I asked him point blank if he was so involved with Kelsey's pregnancy because he was the father of her child. He denied it. I then asked him to introduce me to Kelsey since he had given her money that belonged to both of us. When I mentioned this, he got very defensive and accused me of being insecure. I responded by saying that I at least had a right to know the person I was helping and that he shouldn't have a problem with me meeting Kelsey if nothing was going on between them.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
He then told me that he wasn't going to introduce us and that I needed to work on my jealousy issues. I decided to contact Kelsey the next day.
Courtney
Yeah, yeah, yeah, gather.
Shane
I found her, or at least the woman I thought was her, through a mutual friend's Facebook page. I sent her a message telling her who I was. I explained to her why I was concerned about her relationship with my husband and requested that she please let me know if she was having my husband's baby. She sent me a very nasty message back. I will spare you many of the details. The basic gist was that I was old and unattractive and unable to satisfy my husband, so he found someone better.
Courtney
Oh, my God.
Angela
Kelsey. No, not my Kelsey.
Shane
Among other things, she claimed that the baby was my husband's and that he was planning to leave me, but felt sorry for me and couldn't bring himself to do it. She ended the message by telling me that I should let him go so they could be together. It hurt a lot to read that message. It still hurts for me to think about it. I confronted my husband that same night. I showed him the message. He got really quiet and admitted that she was telling the truth, but denied telling her all of the horrible things she said about me. He said it getting her pregnant was a mistake and he was only trying to do the right thing by her and the baby.
Courtney
Oh, right thing by her. Oh, oh, right thing by her.
Angela
Right.
Shane
He denied that they were still sleeping together and said he wanted to stay with me and have a baby with me. I have no idea if either of these things are true. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Everything has happened so fast. A couple of days have passed now, and I'm still thinking things over. He wants us to go to counseling to try to work through this, but I don't think I'm interested in working on our marriage. It would be hard for me to get past this if he had cheated, but the fact that he may be having a child with this woman makes it harder if I stay with him. She's always going to be in our lives. I have thought about waiting until we can do a paternity test to make a final decision, but I don't know if I want to do that either. It may be easier if I just make the change now. I have started looking for divorce attorneys. Most of my family and friends have told me I need to get out of this marriage, and each day I get closer to making that move. I just need a bit more time before I'm ready to make a decision.
Narrator/Advertiser
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Angela
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Narrator/Advertiser
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Angela
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Narrator/Advertiser
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Angela
Exactly this. That's the sound of your closet working for you. The realreal Earn more, save time, sell fast. And right now you can get an extra $100 to shop when you sell for the first time. Go to therealreal.com to get your extra hundred dollars. Therealreal.com that's therealreal.com update number two.
Shane
She ran.
Courtney
Ooh, she ran.
Angela
Update.
Courtney
She ran.
Shane
I'm not going to stay with him. As soon as I'm able, I'll file for divorce. She ran. Update, she ran.
Courtney
She literally has all the material. Adultery. There's physical proof of it.
Angela
There's gaslighting, there's manipulation.
Courtney
The DMs, it's all there.
Shane
She's got a fricking baby, man, oh man. She's got a frickin baby.
Courtney
Bobby, Pam, Cotton dry.
Shane
She's calling you nasty things. Hey, you know he's saying nasty things. If she's saying nasty things to you.
Angela
Mate, it's simple, but it's also heartbreaking. I feel bad for her, but it's like cut and dry.
Courtney
Like he was gaslighting her hardcore up until she had to show him the dm. And then he's still trying to lie to her.
Angela
I don't believe a word he says where he goes.
Courtney
But I didn't say any of that stuff. No, I don't care. I don't care. It's all true now.
Shane
It's mind blowing.
Angela
You want to meet her? You're so messed up with jealousy issues. It's crazy.
Shane
Yeah.
Courtney
Also I'm so dumb.
Angela
I can't believe he thought he would get away with this. Being like, I'm just gonna ask her if she'll just make some donations to this random woman.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
Wow.
Shane
Yeah. I mean, every time it's like, how dumb do you think people are? Yeah.
Angela
This is making me think of something I just want to put in as a request.
Courtney
It'd be so cool to have a.
Angela
Little button that's like. Or like a bell. And it's a. Ladies and gentlemen, we got em.
Shane
Oh, that's good. That's good, that's good.
Angela
And then like. And then lights go off and we go woo.
Shane
A disco ball comes out and it's.
Angela
Like, ladies and gentlemen, we got em.
Shane
I like it. Our audio listeners are like, I'm done with this show.
Angela
They're like, I like this cause it's conversational. Please don't make this full of bits.
Shane
All right. And that's the end of that.
Courtney
I hope she took everything he was with.
Shane
All right, our next story comes from Am I Overreacting. This was posted earlier in 2025. Is there a logical reason for my girlfriend to say stuff like this? There's a screenshot of a conversation.
Angela
I love text threads.
Courtney
Me too.
Narrator/Advertiser
Me too.
Shane
On Reddit, it's one message the girlfriend sent OP a text. I'm so mad Mr. Beast is engaged. Like, how the fuck did he have no girlfriend? When I first watched him got one, I got lucky enough they broke up. He shortly got another one later, then quickly proposed crying emoji. Okay.
Courtney
Does she think she has a chance with Mr. Beast?
Shane
I, a 24 year old man and my girlfriend 23 year old woman will go from some of the sweetest convos to her saying stuff like this out of the blue. I'm sure I'm not the only person that has dealt with something like this, but honestly, just trying to get an answer from both sides and have you done this before and why and if it's happened to you, how did you go about the issue? It feels disrespectful to hear it from somebody that states they want to be married to me one day. Her reasoning is that it's somebody famous and there's nothing to worry about. But I don't see that as a reason to be able to tell my partner that I wished I could be with somebody else. Am I overreacting? I think it's cause it's Mr. Beast.
Courtney
Yeah, I think that's the like, if.
Shane
She was writing this, she was like, oh, Chris Hemsworth is married.
Angela
Yeah. You'd be like, oh, yeah.
Shane
But yeah. All right. Ha ha. Mr.
Courtney
Beast.
Shane
Maybe she's being funny.
Courtney
Maybe she's being funny.
Shane
Maybe she's hilarious. What?
Angela
But okay, so getting. What? You're right to highlight that part because that part is so unusual and it made me scared that maybe there's a potential future that we're living in that Mr. Beast gets sexiest man alive one day.
Shane
No, no, no.
Courtney
I will not let that happen.
Shane
Courtney will not let that happen.
Courtney
I will not let that happen.
Angela
As long as you don't let that happen. But it is interesting when people in relationships out loud will talk about other people, but then there's celebrity crushes versus like, God, our waiter is so hot. I wish I was with our waiter.
Courtney
Right?
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
Versus like, I get it when it's a celebrity. Cause it's like, oh, you're just kind of like simping after them in a parasocial way. Right? I don't know. Yeah.
Shane
Like you're almost talking about a fictional character. I get it like a hall pass. I get it. But it's also something like, with your partner to, like, know. Like to read the room a little bit. And he's talking also about just like, in the middle of a genuine conversation, she just throws things out there. Yeah, I think it's something worth talking to her about. Definitely. The verdict was not overreacting. Comments. I have never seen a Mr. Beast Simp before. That's new. Someone said, I got lucky enough they broke up. Lmao. What? Lastly, someone said, anyone who wishes they were married to Mr. Beast is concerning. I mean, sure, obviously he is rich, but as long as we're dreaming, think of all the famous rich people you could pick from. I'm wondering if this is an inept attempt at making OP jealous in the hopes that it'll push him to propose. Oh, maybe.
Angela
What a weird way to communicate.
Courtney
Yeah. At first when I heard the text, I was like, oh, maybe she's mad that, like, Mr. Beast went from single to engaged before she did. Like, you know what I mean? Where it's like, ugh, even Mr. Beast can get engaged before me. And I'm like, same girl, same. Yeah, but it doesn't sound like that. Sounds like there's nothing sexy about playing with people's livelihood.
Shane
I'm sorry.
Courtney
There you go, Mr. Beast. There you go.
Shane
No, siree. Yeah. I don't know what to say to this story other than he just needs to follow up and be like, hey, what's. What. What?
Angela
What was that back there, yo? What?
Shane
What was that?
Courtney
Yeah, it sounds like he's been kind of okay with it up until this point. And, like, he hasn't really voiced. Doesn't sound like he's really voiced that.
Angela
He's kind of.
Courtney
Kind of weirded out by it, like. Cause, you know, I think couples joke all the time, like, oh, you see that? Wow, that person's hot. Isn't that crazy? Yeah, it's like, anyways, moving on. But not like a, oh, if only my hero, Mr. Beast, would come for me.
Angela
If only I met you before him. Before you.
Courtney
Yeah. Yeah.
Angela
Then that's so weird.
Shane
I mean, this is such a weird text that it's like it could be interpreted multiple ways. Is it? You're talking about it in, like, a hypothetical or talking about it just in, like, a fun fictional way? Or are you talking about it like, oh, this. If only.
Courtney
This is like, I would jump at.
Shane
The chance this is a possible thing for me and I would do this. There is, like, ways that I think couples talk about other people in, you know, crushes, like celebrity crushes and stuff. That is fine. And then there are people who take it, like, to that next level of like, really talking about, like, oh, I wish I was. Or like, she's like, hey, that's disrespectful.
Angela
Damn, she's not single.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
What a crazy thing.
Courtney
I also just think it's strange. It can be in a parasocial light where it's like, you don't know this person. Like, you think you want to date the idea of this person, but you're currently in a happy relationship. But the idea of this person, you do not know who has heavily edited all of his content. You do not.
Shane
Who?
Courtney
That guy. We do not know who that guy is.
Angela
Yeah, it's like acting like she has a shot, which is even more harmful to op.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
Yeah. Like, what am I? Chop liver.
Courtney
What am I?
Shane
What am I?
Angela
Chop liver.
Shane
Hey. All right, moving on.
Angela
No update or anything.
Shane
No update.
Angela
I wish OP had like a second example because I know it's just one text.
Shane
Like one text.
Angela
I'm like, yeah, I don't know what things to say.
Shane
I don't know what to say. Yeah, weird.
Angela
If we posted on Reddit every weird text we got.
Courtney
Oh boy. Yeah, it'd be a six hour special.
Angela
Yeah, it'd be a long special.
Shane
Absolutely. All right, our next story. This comes from relationships. This was posted in 2016. This is a 26 year old woman writing in about her boyfriend who's 28, and her sister in law who's 25. My boyfriend's sister in law gave him a plushie for Christmas and. And didn't make one for anyone else. Okay. I just want to start by saying that I realize I might be totally wrong and insecure in this situation. I just really want another perspective or something because I just can't help the fact that this bothers me and I am admittedly feeling jealousy. I have been with my boyfriend for six months at this point. He has four siblings, three brothers and one sister, and we are the shortest relationship in the family. Three of his siblings are married and another is in a very long term relationship. I think the shortest relationship in the bunch is five and a half years. So I will admit I am a bit intimidated and insecure there. For Christmas this year, his sister in law made him a homemade plushie of this little blue baby dinosaur looking character from his favorite game, Guild Wars. The plushie is amazing quality and he absolutely loved it. But she didn't make one for any of the other boys who Also loved the game just as much. Not even her husband. In fact, she went out of her way to give it to him without his other brothers around. Except for her husband. Her husband was just as excited for her to give his brother the gift as she was. But it just felt off to me and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. Why would she work so hard on something for my boyfriend and no one else? And it just felt like such a personal gift that I could never match. And I just feel like she totally took away from what I gave him. I did try talking to my boyfriend about it and how I thought it was weird. He said he didn't think it was weird at all because she has always been closer to him than the other brothers. Well, shouldn't she be closer to her husband than him? He didn't get one. I don't know. I asked him if he would give it back to her, saying he can't accept it, and he refused and said I'm being ridiculous. I just feel like a woman doesn't make such a personal gift for a guy unless they see them as something more. It was just how I was raised and I hate feeling this way about something like this. I talked to my mom and sister and they both agreed that it wasn't right and that this was most likely the beginning of her trying to push me out. I just can't help but feel like she was trying to make him like her more than me because he said she has never given him anything before and this is our first Christmas together. I just don't know what to think or if I'm overthinking this completely. Okay. Because the sister in law gave him this gift along with her husband and her husband was just as excited to give him the gift. That's.
Angela
Oh, they gave it to them as a couple.
Shane
The couple gave it to him. Sure. She just happened to make it. Oh, so it feels like a couple giving him a gift more so than just her.
Courtney
Yeah. Like, I don't know. There's a lot of like missing details of like, what's the overall culture of gifting at the holidays for you guys? Does everyone give something to everybody or is it like. Cause I have a big family. Sometimes we kind of secret Santa it in a way because it's just so much money. It's that knitted sweater curse where it's like when you gift something that's handmade from the heart, it always stirs up some drama.
Angela
And that might be what's happening here. It might have blinded op or just altered their vision a tad in terms of adding a lot of thought to something that was kind of not meant to have too much weight.
Shane
Yeah. I think the ask of give it back to her is a lot strange. That's really intense.
Angela
Or like, I just wish op, like, express how they felt to this person. Instead of telling them what to do, just tell them how they felt and made their partner decide what their actions were.
Courtney
Off of that, I would have asked the sister in law, like, so what inspired you to make this? What gave you guys this win?
Angela
I don't know if I agree with the sentiment that when the gendered part of this being if opposite genders give each other a gift and it means a lot. Whatever that sentence was in there, it was like, then it means more or something like that. It just seemed.
Shane
Yeah. She said, I just feel like a woman doesn't make such a personal gift for a guy unless they see them as something more. Yeah, I don't agree with that whatsoever.
Angela
Yeah. Once my best friend, him and I were like on an improv team together forever at ucla. He was one of my roommates and also two other girls. And this was right when, like, big T shirts were in and I was getting some good ones. And he would take my T shirts. And this is like a brother to me. He would take my T shirts constantly and he would wear them. So then I started to take his. Cause I was like, okay, I'm out of shirts. And I took his once, and his girlfriend saw me in his shirt.
Shane
Oh.
Angela
And she was one of my closest friends at the time. And she went, what is that? Why are you in that? And I was like, I can't express enough.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
The sight of him makes me disgusted. I am not in love. He's just my roommate. He's taking all my shirts.
Courtney
And she probably didn't know that he was taking your shirt.
Angela
Yeah. And it was just one of those things. I don't know why that made me think of this.
Shane
There's the added layer of this is a sister in law. And the husband was well aware of the gift.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
That to me is like, hey, man, you're making it weird.
Courtney
Yeah. I also wonder sometimes. Sometimes you make something cool and then you're like, all right, I don't really want it anymore. Hey, this person might really like it. Take it like it. There's so many reasons why.
Angela
And I also, I forgot my whole point of my story was that I didn't realize that my friend was triggered from a past relationship of Her. You know what I mean? And, like, the second I was like, oh, he steals all my shirts. I'm out of shirts. This was a protest move. And she was like, honestly, I think I was just triggered. I thought my ex cheated on me. And I was just like, what is this? You know?
Courtney
And then I was like, okay, so.
Angela
I wonder if this op's adding some other, I don't know, layer, like, trauma to this.
Courtney
Yeah, this feels like just a plushie. Yeah, she's clearly, like, insecure about something.
Shane
Comments. You're reading way too much into this. As someone else said, there may be a backstory on in joke there that you don't know about. Also, it's entirely possible that she's working on gifts for everyone else. If it's as nice as you say, it probably takes a while to make. So maybe she ran out of time. She's happily married to his brother and gave him the gift in front of her husband. And you think she's trying to push you out? That's some master level insecurity there. OP responded saying, I guess the time thing is a good way to look at it. It does look very professional. I don't sew, so I really don't know how long something like that takes. And that's just how my mom has raised us. She has always been very protective of our father. I try not to be her because I know she can be a bit much at times, but this situation just completely threw me off. And it's honestly hard to see his other siblings and significant others fitting into the family unit so well, while I'm just the outcast. I think she's being really insecure there. I'm like, you've been dating this guy for six months. You're just not integrated into the family.
Courtney
I don't even know what's going on.
Shane
Yeah, man, give it some time.
Courtney
You're making something about you that has nothing to do with.
Shane
Yeah, her insecurity is gonna be what pushes her out. Yeah, you are overreacting. Being jealous, paranoid, and controlling girlfriend will drive him away. You've been together six months, and you're already trying to determine what presents he's allowed to receive from his family. Yeah, that's crazy. You are the one making up a wedge to drive between you and his family, not her. Calm down. It's a stuffed animal, not a blowjob, which is probably what her husband got and why she didn't gift it in front of you. Op said it wouldn't have bothered me if it was from his actual family. It's just that it's the significant other of his brother that bothered me. If his actual sister made it for him, I would never in a million years have asked him to return the gift. All right, she's losing me even more.
Courtney
Yeah, she's really got to let go. This is internalized misogyny. Pretty hardcore.
Shane
Lastly, someone said, I think you really are looking too deeply into it. You commented that his brother was also really excited to see him get it. So there's maybe some kind of backstory here. You are coming in on half a decade to the other relationships, which can be totally daunting. They have five plus years of fights, inside, jokes and experiences together. Good luck.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Update uh oh uh oh. What do you think the chances are that the sister in law and him are. What's the worst case? What do you think the chances are.
Courtney
Sister in law bought my boyfriend a.
Angela
Pram update he ran.
Shane
My first post wasn't popular by any means, but it got a decent amount of comments so I figured I'd update. I went a few weeks without saying anything else about the subject because everyone on here seemed to disagree with my side of things. Then last Saturday he told me he was going to be spending the day at his brother's just to hang out. We generally make plans on Saturdays, but I hadn't had the chance to make plans official with him yet. I just figured it was implied at this point. So I asked him if I would be allowed to go over there with him. That's when he told me that it was just going to be a day with him and his brother. So I reminded him that since it is his brother's house then most likely his wife will be present too. So I don't. I didn't really see how it was fair. Ultimately it blew up and I told him everything. Brought up the gift again and just how I feel intimidated by everyone and feel like his sister in law is on some pedestal or something because she gets to be there and I don't. I also mentioned house. I also mentioned how I just feel like I was being pushed out by her and that the gift made me uneasy. He was frustrated and told me that he was going to his brother's and that he would talk to me later. So I spent all morning Saturday on edge and just completely jealous. Then around 1pm his sister in law called me. I guess he gave her my number and asked me if I was free to meet her for coffee. I was confused but agreed to have coffee with her. I expected it to be awkward at the coffee shop. She wasted no time to tell me that my boyfriend had told her everything. She said she wanted to meet for dinner because she wanted me to see her face and see that she was genuine in everything she had to say. She went on to explain that she had no feelings for him in the way I was implying to him and no intention of pushing me out. She said her original plan was to make the plushie for all the boys since they all play the game, but it took her way too much time to make one, so she wanted to give it to her favorite brother in law. I questioned why not her husband and she said that she lives with him and he knew she was making it in the first place and that she could make him one anytime and just wanted that one to be a surprise Christmas presentation. I told her that I still kind of thought it was inappropriate since he was in a relationship now and she just paused and didn't say anything for a few seconds.
Angela
You can't get plushies when you're in a relationship.
Shane
It's a rule. You're not allowed to stuffed animals when you're in a relationship. Then she asked me if there was anything else that was bothering me. I used today as an example and said it bothered me that he went to her house and told me I couldn't come because it was a day with his brother, even though she was obviously she would obviously be there. She told me that it is a day with his brother and that just because she lives in the house doesn't change that. She said that she kept to herself doing her own things while the boys played video games with each other and that my boyfriend came to her when she was in the kitchen to talk to her about me briefly. I didn't say anything. I still felt a bit jealous, but I just didn't know what to say. She then asked me if I had anything else. I wanted to get out and I declined. She said that she didn't want to part ways without giving me some advice. She went on to say that she thinks I'm a very nice girl and that the entire family feels that way and wanted to remind me that all of the spouses and significant others were new to the family. At one point in time. She went on about how it takes time to feel a closeness with everyone and that she went through it too. She then said that she didn't want to come across the wrong way, but that I needed to work hard on my insecurities or else I would lose my boyfriend. She Just went on and on at saying how I am so nice and that I am ruining a good thing by letting myself overthink these things and by being so insecure. She told me to really think about how I am acting over his own sister in law interacting with him. That's when my stupid brain made me say, well, if you were to get a divorce then you wouldn't be his sister in law and you would just be another woman in his life.
Angela
Hello. Hello.
Shane
That was the moment it finally hit me just how crazy I was being.
Angela
Whoa.
Shane
Well, she gave me this look and said well, we aren't getting a divorce so. And I just felt completely embarrassed and apologized. She then very nicely told me that on second thought she thinks I might not be ready for a relationship at all and that I really need to work on myself. That was pretty much the end of it and we parted ways. I spent the rest of the weekend crying and hating myself. My boyfriend didn't call me or text me at all. Finally on Monday he asked if he could come over. So he came over and asked how it went with my sister in law and I had figured he knew everything but he said that all she said was that he needed to talk to me. Turns out he didn't talk to me all weekend because he was angry with how I acted about him going to his brother's house then bringing up the gift again and he just needed some space. He told me that he wasn't going to put up with this type of behavior and that it is putting way too much unnecessary drama into his life as I'm sure you're probably guessing. He proceeded to break up with me. He told me he really cared about me but he just can't imagine how bad it will get get in the future if I'm already acting like this with people who are his family. I begged him not to leave and that I would do everything to change and he just wouldn't budge. I haven't heard from him since and I feel like I had my heart ripped out and stomped on. It hurts so bad and I know this is all my fault. I have my mom and sister telling me how it's good riddance and how he broke up with me so that he wouldn't have anything holding him back from his sister in law and this just broke me. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I am so done with my family and the way they put these toxic ideas in my head. Whoa. I'm just done. So yeah, not a happy update from here. I am planning on working on Myself and hope to someday maybe convince him to give me another chance. I don't know why I wrote this update. It just feels good to get it out, I guess. And further convinces me I need to change. Wow.
Courtney
Wow.
Angela
Okay. Hot. Take her not knowing why she's writing this update. She's writing this update because the people she's looking for for advice are not helping her. From that one sentence it sounds like her community is not building her up and is actually kind of traumatizing her.
Courtney
Probably where she got those things from.
Angela
And I love when we see these people on Reddit that are like, I don't really know what I'm doing here. And you're like, oh no, that's your human instinct to need like connection and community because you need help right now and you're not getting it from. It sounds like your parent, your mom or your sister.
Shane
No, in fact it almost sounds, and this is reaching, but it almost sounds like her mom and sister are so toxic in the way that they almost don't want her to be in a relationship where they're convincing her that this relationship is bad.
Courtney
Yeah, he just broke up with you to go be with his sister in law.
Shane
Yeah, she's gonna cheat on you.
Angela
She had the sister in law in front of her telling her, hey, I am no threat. I've been where you've been. It's hard. So maybe your feelings of being the only the new person are clouding you and making you feel jealous or something, but I'm letting you don't act this way. And then she still was like, well, you're my way.
Shane
Her relationship with her boyfriend was over before she went and met with the sister in law though. No, I think he had already made his decision.
Courtney
Well, yeah, I mean that argument just sounded so messy to accused of that of like people have known each other for five plus years. Like also sister in law, that is a girl's girl and someone who, everyone deserves to have someone like that in their life that is so, so compassionate and willing to tell you something like that.
Angela
Yeah, we don't have.
Courtney
Not everybody has those people in their lives. And that conversation sounded really tough and it sucks that the relationship had to end. But OP like needed to experience this to change for the better for sure.
Angela
Yeah, yeah. Like I wish OP heard the sister in law out and reached out to her boyfriend and was like, I was so wrong, I'm so sorry. Instead of hiding and being like oh no, oh gosh. But you know what I do wanna say I also understand when you Are the new person to a dynamic. Sometimes feeling so lonely and insecure that you think everyone's out to get you and you kind of mess with your own narrative and you're like. And that's why you need people that are gonna be like the sister in law and not like her family and be like, hey, you're in your head. Just like how the comments were like, hey, respectfully, you're in your head. Get out. Because you're gonna ruin this for yourself.
Shane
Right?
Courtney
Yeah. They did predict that it took a.
Shane
Lot for her to. For it to finally register for her.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Cause having insecurities is one thing, but when people are telling you something.
Angela
Yes.
Shane
How much you fight back and let those insecurities win is a big deal.
Angela
Yes.
Shane
And it took her to reach a certain point to then hear herself, gosh, that sucks. Oh my God. But she's young. She's learning this now. Like, she's going to be grateful for this moment eventually. I really believe, because she's, she's 26, there's a lot of time to change how she handles these things. And in her next relationship, not let her insecurities win.
Courtney
Yeah. Like when you're in a situation like that, you have like, I think you said this to me and it hit me forever. And my therapist also said it similarly where it's like, emotions are not facts.
Angela
Yeah.
Courtney
And to set the feelings aside. And the fact is, like, there is so much beyond her. These relationships that have been around longer than she has. Five and a half years. This sister in law had five and a half years to go after this brother.
Angela
I'm glad. She like almost woke herself up by being like, if you weren't married, if you guys were getting a divorce, you would just be another woman. And then she was like, well, we're not. And she was like, whoa.
Shane
She really, in that moment, disconnected with her ego.
Angela
Yes.
Shane
Like, oh, I'm not even saying this stuff. This is some other part of me.
Courtney
Any woman is a threat.
Shane
Yeah. She had a breakthrough.
Courtney
Yeah. Thank God.
Angela
Just a little too late.
Shane
A little too late. But she's young. But also never too late. Because when you have one, it's like, great, great, you're there.
Angela
Yeah.
Shane
Anyways, our next story. This comes from today. I fucked up. This was posted December 2025. As of post, as of filming this like a couple days ago. Whoa. Today I fucked up by telling my wife how hot she looked in a shirt.
Courtney
Boo.
Angela
Boo.
Shane
Bad.
Courtney
Can't believe you did that.
Shane
You fucked up. This happened not even a half hour ago. We are going out for my mother in law's birthday this evening and my wife came out and asked if the shirt she was wearing looked okay on her. It wasn't anything special but she looked damn good in it. Really good and I told her so. It fit great and was just the perfect amount of tight in the right places. I joked about looking forward to getting it off of her later, making the lame dad joke about the only way the shirt would look better is if it was on our bedroom floor. She laughed and said I was going to regret saying that. Turns out my mom gave it to her. It wasn't new. My mom had it for a while but hadn't worn it for years. When we visited her over Thanksgiving weekend, my mom and my wife went through her closet to see what she might want before donating the rest to a shelter. My wife started to tease me asking if I thought it looked that hot when my mother wore it. Then our kids started piling on going extra with it after being icked out by my earlier the kids were in earshots. Kids were there? No, there were children. A few minutes later my phone started blowing up. My wife took no time to share this with my mom and my sisters. Now I'm getting shit from every side and I supply the ammunition. I have no doubt whatsoever that my wife will make sure to wear the shirt the next time we get together with my family. I love to think like he like he's like no. Everyone knows he like leaves and it's cut to him in Times Square and.
Angela
It'S like on all these mailman goes.
Courtney
You want to fuck your mom?
Shane
And you're served.
Courtney
And you're served.
Shane
Whoa.
Courtney
This is silly.
Shane
This one's silly.
Angela
This one's silly. There's no breast milk for protein here.
Shane
No, not here.
Angela
Nar.
Shane
Next time she asks about her outfit, just say meh. It would look better on my mom.
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Shane
Nah, that's not a fuck up. It's rarely a bad idea to tell your so how hot you find them. Someone said. My wife once surprised me with some lingerie. We were getting into it and she let me know that it was something that my mother bought for her. Needless to say, this immediately killed my erection and started a conversation about why on earth would my mother buy lingerie for her to wear for me. Needless to say that it ruined lingerie for me for the rest of my life. Someone said, Sigmund Freud is smiling in his grave. Nice comment.
Angela
How many upvotes has that one got?
Courtney
Theater kids, right?
Angela
Upvotes are.
Shane
Anyways, this is silly.
Angela
And this is funny.
Shane
I agree.
Angela
I have a picture of my mom in the 80s looking, like, really hot and cool in my apartment, and I'm like, if someone ever walked to me and went, who's that hot woman? I would be like.
Shane
You would barf and jump out the window. I'd go.
Courtney
I love when a hand me down. Or a gifted. Like a secondhand item fits you like a glove.
Angela
Oh, yeah, totally.
Courtney
And it was made for you, and.
Angela
It gets you all in the Lord places. Yeah, it's. And usually this stuff. Yeah. I wear a lot of my old grandma's stuff, and it's nice and chunky big, and I love it. It's like big, chunky cardigans. And people are like, where'd you get that? I'm like, like, from the 50s.
Shane
Whoa. From the past, bro.
Angela
But I ain't doing sexy stuff in that.
Courtney
No, no.
Angela
It's like I'm picturing this top as.
Courtney
Like a crop top or like a leather. I thought it was like a T shirt. For some reason.
Shane
I was just truly picturing normal T shirt. He just liked her in it.
Angela
Yeah. And that's sweet.
Shane
Yeah.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
And she goes, ha, ha. This is your mom's.
Shane
Ha ha.
Angela
Like, he didn't know.
Shane
Fuck you, dude.
Courtney
He didn't know.
Shane
He didn't know the kids around.
Angela
Jesus.
Courtney
But the kids around is crazy.
Shane
That's a lot. It's a whole lot.
Angela
Like, let him compliment you. Honey, take one.
Shane
Hey, never compliment her again. Yeah, never say any nice thing ever again, pal. That's the lesson. Moving on.
Courtney
You know the. Okay, okay. The last thing, the craziest prank back will be buying something for his dad. Nice. Something for his dad to wear for his mom. Whoa, wait.
Angela
I have to tell you guys a funny story.
Shane
Okay, okay.
Angela
So my brother and his girlfriend, they both got. They got my dad and her dad the same shirt.
Courtney
Oh, hell yeah.
Angela
And for Thanksgiving this year, we're all.
Courtney
Meeting up and my brother looks at.
Angela
My dad and he goes, hey, it would mean a lot if you wore the shirt Liza got you. And then he texted Liza and was like, have your dad wear the shirt. So they walk in, they're like, hey.
Courtney
We'Re both wearing the same shirt. I love that TikTok trend.
Shane
That's really good.
Angela
That's awesome.
Shane
That's really funny.
Courtney
Really good.
Angela
That's really good.
Shane
Damn clever. All right.
Courtney
I loved it. I loved it.
Shane
No notice. Nice. Very cool.
Courtney
Next story.
Shane
It is time for our final story. Can you believe it's been so long?
Courtney
Yeah, can't believe it.
Shane
Our last story comes from the relationships subreddit. It was posted in 2015. Oh, weird years. This is a 21 year old woman. My boyfriend who's 21 of 7 months just threw me out of his apartment because I sent him a poop sticker on Facebook. Is he being immature or am I. Remember the days of Facebook crazy.
Courtney
A poop sticker.
Angela
A poop. Oh yeah, like you would poke and then you could send stickers in the messenger.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
Or can you send stickers on the wall?
Courtney
I don't know.
Shane
Stickers on the wall, Stickers on the wall. I'm embarrassed by how childish and petty this sounds, especially compared to the other stuff on this subreddit. However, this is my first relationship and I honestly don't know what to think about what just happened. First of all, my boyfriend Greg and I have pretty immature senses of humor and always have. We like to tease each other a lot and commonly partake in body humor. Like we'll joke around if one of us farted. Or after a night out at dinner, we'll drive home and pretend to be in labor and call dibs on the bathroom to deliver our food. Babies, AKA poop. It's the worst thing I've ever heard in my life.
Angela
That sucks.
Courtney
Yeah, that sucks.
Shane
It sounds so childish typing it out, but we have a lot of fun and are very comfortable with each other. Also, we have never had a fight before and communicate openly about things but have never had a real problem to communicate about. Tonight I was at his place to marathon Netflix. Greg got up to go to the bathroom and I asked him if I should pause it AKA would he be taking a long time. He answered no so I figured he was just going to go pee. However, 15 minutes later he still wasn't back from the bathroom. No problem. I got up to make myself a snack. On the way to the kitchen, I walked past the bathroom and heard the sounds of an app that Greg and I commonly play on our phones. I thought this was pretty funny. On Facebook there are sticker sets to use in the chat feature which are basically like unique emojis. One of the sets features an anime looking poop character and his toilet paper friend. No idea why someone made this, but I think it's quite funny and kind of cute. One of the stickers is of the poop character sitting on a toilet looking intently at his phone. So I playfully sent this to Greg. Me poop sticker of playing on a phone. Me with an arrow pointing to the poop sticker. You right now face with the tongue out him. Wow. I laughed to myself, put my phone away, made my snack and went back to the living room. Greg came out and we continued to watch Netflix. However, I noticed he was being physically distant, not putting his arm around me, not sitting close to me on the couch. However, I gave him his space. He was quiet for about 20 minutes, then said, do you have a friend that you could get to take you home? I literally did not know what he was talking about. I said what? And he repeated what he'd said. I asked him what was wrong but he wouldn't answer for a while. I asked him if he was upset with me and he said I just can't believe you did that. That was just really upsetting. I said what are you talking about? You mean the sticker? Him? Obviously I was stunned. I had no idea why he was so offended or what exactly I had done wrong, but I immediately apologized. I said I am so sorry that I offended you. I had no idea. That was not my intent at all. I was just joking. Could you just tell me what upset you so I don't do it again in the future? He said there was something wrong with me and that I had the mentality of a fucking child. I was really hurt by this and asked if he seriously wanted me to leave. He said yes and I asked if he was going to drive me home. I had ridden with him and didn't have my car. He Said no, because why would he after what I just did? I was so pissed off that I stormed out of the house. Keep in mind that this was 11pm in a crappy part of town. None of the buses were running, and I felt too ashamed to call my friends. So I walked all the way home. Nothing happened. But I'm so mad he would force me to walk home by myself in a shady area just because of this. And he showed no concern for me whatsoever. So now I'm sitting here fuming. I'm actually considering ending things over his huge overreaction because he refuses to talk to me and explain what's going on. He keeps saying, you should know. Then he said, whatever, I'm going to bed. And cut me off. Reddit, what is going on? Can anyone shed light on this? Is this even worth trying to salvage? I find his rage at this and refusal to communicate very immature, to the point where I almost don't want to be in a relationship with him anymore. Like, if he'll send me out in the cold for this, is he going to leave me on the side of the road next time we disagree on something? I'm so confused. He has never reacted like this or gotten mad at anything before. I just don't think I did anything really bad. However, this is my first relationship, so if I'm in the wrong, let me know. Thanks.
Courtney
What in the world?
Shane
What the.
Courtney
Does he think she called him a piece of shit?
Shane
This is you, dude. You're a huge piece of shit. Who's on his phone?
Angela
I like that she opened the story with being like, we do potty humor.
Shane
Yes. Giving us context.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
So this.
Shane
Even without potty humor, this reaction is absolutely absurd.
Angela
Also, such a vintage story about the stickers and the Ubers. It's like, whoa.
Courtney
Also, girl, your life is worth being embarrassed to. Call your friends. Okay.
Angela
Yeah.
Courtney
Call your friends. Be safe. You should. I'm surprised you didn't call your friends. You're, like, clearly confused. I hope you have good friends that you feel like you can talk to.
Angela
Yeah. Because this is so scary. And, like, when someone, like, flips on a dime like that, and the way he spoke to her.
Courtney
Yeah, that's concerning. It's like, who is this guy?
Angela
I wonder if he was having a little bit of a moment and was very embarrassed. He told her he wouldn't be in there that long, and then he just was really. You know, like, sometimes you'll see people that are, like, not, like, a little bit emotionally stunted, and then when they get embarrassed, it's like 0 to 100.
Shane
Sure.
Angela
This feels a little bit like that. Where, like, I see that a small little thing happened, and he went, like, really hardcore.
Courtney
What if he was jorking it?
Shane
Ooh. But then she's wrong. Her sticker makes no sense.
Courtney
And then he's like, how dare you? Yeah, how dare you?
Shane
I'm not taking a shit.
Angela
I'm not poop, I'm jorking.
Courtney
I'm not poop, I'm ham.
Shane
What?
Angela
I'm not poop.
Courtney
I'm bone. I'm bone.
Shane
All right. I'm not poop.
Narrator/Advertiser
I'm bone.
Angela
Whoa.
Shane
Let's read some comments here. Do you think there were maybe some other issues? And he immediately just pinned it on the first thing he could blame it on the poop sticker. Sounds like an asshole for making you walk home so late. Op Said, I've been wondering this myself if this is really because of some other underlying issue, but for the life of me, I 100% can't think of anything that would be bothering him. He's acted totally normal, and we've had a great last couple of weeks. Lots of fun dates, went partying with friends, et cetera. This is totally out of the blue for me, and I just want to know if he's really upset about something else, but he just won't talk to me. Someone said, I'm not sure what the fuck his deal is, but when he finally tells you what he you already know, please come back and tell me. Also, everyone shits. I sing songs about my boyfriend shitting while he shits, and at other inappropriate times of the day, dude needs a serious attitude adjustment. Opie said, yeah, I do this, too. We both joke about pooping and stinking up the bathroom, so don't go in there type of stuff. So I don't know what his problem is. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks he's overreacting. I'll update if I ever get an explanation for his behavior. Thanks. Someone said, sounds like he was looking for a way out. Sorry.
Angela
Oh.
Courtney
Comes out of nowhere. Like the text. Like, wow. The text.
Shane
Wow.
Courtney
Back being like, okay, what does that even mean? And then needing to immediately remove her.
Angela
I know, but that's just being like, hey, I'm kind of shutting down right now. Do you mind if tomorrow we reset, like, a little bit of a something, something?
Shane
We did read another story one time where, like, a small little thing like this happened and the guy, like, got in his car.
Angela
No, the duck.
Shane
Yeah. Oh, Mr. Finger Duck, lotion man. This is like, lotion man.
Angela
Why did I think duck, duck, lotion man? Maybe Cause I heard the duck in that episode, remember?
Shane
I thought I heard.
Courtney
Oh, yeah.
Shane
But yeah, this lady was like, lotion man.
Angela
And he was like, we're done.
Shane
We're done. He got in his car and he left. Because people reach up because they clearly are holding onto a bunch of stuff, and then they just go, update.
Angela
Okay, let's go, let's go, let's go. Get the bell out.
Shane
After taking today to think about it and talking it over with my best friend, I decided to follow my instinct and the advice of everyone here and break up with Greg. He didn't contact me at all since he abruptly cut me off last night. And after he posted a picture of having a grand old brunch with his buddies on Facebook, I decided enough was enough. He didn't seem to have any remorse, and it really stung to see how few shits he gave about me, pun intended. I messaged him, you're a shitty person. We're over. Don't contact me again. And blocked him on Facebook. Sorry I wasn't brave enough to use the brilliant response. Some people suggested the dump and turd puns were great, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was too mad. After I changed my relationship status and deleted our couple pics, I got several calls from Greg. I debated just blocking his number as well, but my curiosity got the best of me, so I picked up. I was met with dead silence. He was really pissed at me. I said hello in an impatient way, and he said, this is really how you're going to do this? We had an argument where we were basically just shouting and blaming each other, with me mostly defending my decision to break up with him, saying I was a bitch for throwing away a good relationship on a whim. I pointed out that I'd been willing to work it out with him and try to fix whatever it was that I'd done wrong. But it was his unwillingness that made me think it wasn't worth it. After about 40 minutes of arguing, Greg started to realize that I was really serious and this wasn't just a tactic to get his attention. And he started getting genuinely upset. He said, please don't break up. We are so good together. Which was actually hard for me to hear because up until this point, we have had a really great relationship. So I started to feel really bad. However, I kept thinking about how I'd never trust him with my safety again and how galling it was that he hadn't been concerned about me or my well being until he noticed we were now broken up. Also, how surprised I'd been by his anger and name calling. I'd never seen that side of him before and no longer trusted who I thought he was. So I tried to stand firm. Long story short, we talked slash argued for a while longer and Greg thought that talking about the problem would be enough to get me to stay with him. So he confessed and it was really stupid in my opinion. Basically, about a week ago I hung out with Greg and his buddies. We are both gamers and they were having a game night and asked me to come along. The attitude of that whole group is to trash talk each other and playfully rib each other, especially while gaming. So that night when we were playing games, I joined in on the trash talk. None of it was mean spirited to me. It was just take some of that, yeah, eat shit type stuff. But apparently Greg felt embarrassed because I beat him a few times in front of his friends and gloated about it. This was my bad, but everybody was.
Angela
Making oh, it was your bad for me.
Shane
But everybody was making a huge show of gloating and peacocking after every victory. So I thought this wasn't out of the ordinary if I also did it. I thought it was just part of the fun, but in hindsight it was probably weird and I probably should have acted differently. Also, they kept making comments like, wow, you're basically dating a dude and you know your girlfriend is basically just like a girl version of name of dude in their group to Greg because they were surprised that I was willing to have frank discussions about certain topics like poop, sex, et cetera. I got the vibe they didn't spend that much time around girls because they were acting so surprised every time something like that came up.
Angela
Whoa, she said something.
Courtney
I knew.
Shane
Oh my God, she said something about poop.
Courtney
I knew it was gonna be something that his friends or something swayed his opinion on how they normally act around poop and stuff.
Angela
Whoa, I can't believe you beat me in video games. I guess I just don't hang out with that many girls.
Shane
It was like that mentality of whoa, girls don't fart or acknowledge farting. This is weird. I brushed it off, but I guess afterwards Greg's friends kept teasing him about that night and made some assertions that I was too manly and that I didn't or wouldn't respect him cause I was manlier than him.
Angela
His friends sound like a great fucking time.
Courtney
Yeah, I remember it's 2015 in this story.
Angela
Oh, you're so right. I'm monitoring his Facebook wall.
Courtney
These. These men have not learned.
Shane
And also because I'd been beating him slash peacocking about it. I'm not entirely clear, but he made it clear that a lot of the mocking was going on. So I guess this has been festering inside Greg ever since then and making him insecure. The poop sticker thing sent him overboard because he thought I was making fun of him because I didn't respect him. He interpreted it as me calling him a fat pile of shit and thinking I couldn't get away with that. His words it's still not entirely clear to me. He didn't do a great job of explaining it and was very frustrated that he had to articulate his feelings. I wasn't impressed. I will probably get flack for this, but I didn't feel very much empathy about his problem and thought it was kind of ridiculous and stupid. If Greg had brought this up to me at any point, we could have had a discussion about it and I would have toned it down. Though I disagree that my behavior being manly was somehow something for him to get insecure about. Unattractive, okay, I could see it, but it seemed like it was being turned into an emasculation thing by his friends and and it's hard for me to wrap my head around that. It feels almost red pilly, but I don't know enough about it to really say that I don't really know how I feel. Anyway. I personally didn't think it was something for him to have such a strong reaction about, and it was a problem that could have easily been talked over if it had bothered him so much. I still didn't think it was anything worth kicking me out and ignoring me for or name calling. Nothing is worth that in my opinion. But again, this is my first relationship. I'm probably just being selfish and pissed off. Regardless, it's over now. I told Greg he needed to grow up, but it wasn't going to be with me. His reaction was extremely immature and irrational. He acknowledged that, but was still angry at me. For one insulting him with the sticker and not showing him respect even though we always teased each other. I guess this goes back to the trash talking and two for wanting to break up. He said give it a few days and think about it, but I firmly said I didn't want to date him anymore. He said his friends were right and I was actually a cunt who didn't care about him or respect Him. I hung up. He's been calling me some more. But I'm going to go see Inside out with my friends and feel some feels and not worry about him again.
Narrator/Advertiser
2015.
Shane
It's 2015. I guess we both did some things wrong and we both need to do some maturing. But for now, I don't feel too bad. I'm still pretty pissed off, but surprisingly not that sad for my first breakup. Maybe it will hit tomorrow. Or maybe I'll find a debonair professional type at the movies who will teach me how to have an adult relationship and let me send him poop stickers. Anyway, thanks to the support Reddit, I feel better.
Angela
Great.
Courtney
Oh my goodness. Update, she ran.
Angela
Update, she ran.
Shane
Wow, that was very 2015. I can't believe the term red pill was around.
Courtney
I forget that that was around back then. I forgot that too.
Shane
Yeah, I mean, I know it's a matrix term, but still.
Angela
True. Wait, that's why it pissed her off that he went to the grand old Brunch the next day. Cause it was a bunch of guys who don't hang out with girls who think it's manly if a girl talks about poop and they're at brunch.
Courtney
The most feminine, amazing thing I know.
Shane
Shocking.
Courtney
No. That's unfortunate.
Angela
I'm so glad she got out.
Shane
The fact that she's there being like, hey, we both did things wrong. It's like, I'm not really seeing much on your end.
Courtney
I really did nothing wrong. No, it's the emotions are not facts. Like, everybody in this friend group was shit talking each other and playing and winning. Why should she not be allowed to do that?
Shane
Yeah, that's pure, pure insecurity.
Courtney
Yeah.
Angela
Or just bad friends. Like, it seems like he was fine with it until they got in his ear and they were like, I don't know.
Shane
Your girl's kind of like a man. Yeah. Jesus.
Angela
What a limiting belief to only have only hang out with one type of person and then people who differ from you are a threat to you.
Shane
Yeah.
Angela
They're like, dude, if your girl farted, run, dude, run far away.
Courtney
They're not supposed to do that. They're not atomically built. They're supposed to just make us milk for protein.
Angela
They're just supposed to. I was just about to say, literally, they're just there for milk. Dude.
Courtney
Dude, that's literally it.
Angela
That's literally it.
Narrator/Advertiser
Yeah.
Angela
Don't even. She played video games. You're kidding.
Courtney
Her hands aren't supposed to anatomically work that way.
Angela
But was she just, like, bleeding out milk. What happened to her milk jug?
Shane
Oh, Jesus. Well, that's all of our stories today.
Angela
Thank you so much. You did a great job reading them.
Shane
Thank you. And you did a great job reacting to them.
Courtney
I know we have a lot of couples who listen to our show together, so hopefully this strengthened some relationships. And if it broke some.
Angela
I'm sorry.
Shane
We're sorry.
Courtney
But hopefully for the best.
Angela
Update she ran.
Courtney
Update, she ran.
Shane
Well, anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this, no matter how you're spending your Valentine's Day. And. Yeah, we'll see you next time.
Narrator/Advertiser
Yeah.
Courtney
And if you're doing Valentine's Day and it's just you, I hope you're treating yourself and having a lovely day.
Angela
I love you.
Shane
Yeah, buy some chocolates. Either for yourself or for someone else. Who cares? Or if you don't like chocolate, I don't know, get some milk. Something else.
Courtney
Yeah, get some milk. Or sew someone a plushie.
Angela
There you go.
Shane
Yeah, there you go. There you go.
Angela
Love ya. Love you.
Shane
Love you guys. Bye.
Angela
Bye.
Date: February 14, 2026
Host: Shane Topp
Guests: Courtney, Angela
In this supersized Valentine’s Day edition, host Shane and guests Courtney and Angela dig into a mix of funny, cringeworthy, and emotional Reddit stories about relationships, romance, awkward social situations, and a few deeply odd personal confessions. Through their reactions, they serve up both sage advice and playful banter—perfect for anyone yearning for laughter (and some empathy) around Valentine’s Day.
Time: 01:50–20:45
Time: 21:10–27:32
Time: 27:32–41:44
Time: 41:42–55:28
Time: 65:21–70:31
Time: 71:33–87:47
“We are not a vending machine.”
—Courtney (23:10)
“He’s clearly the father. The fact that Kelsey is agreeing to him coming over…she’s okay with it because it’s…his kid.”
—Courtney (31:28)
“Massive red flag. Past the red flag. It’s the thing.”
—Shane (27:01)
“What you are asking for…is what we all want. A guarantee. Does she or he really like me? Or just my looks, my money, my status, the fantasy in his or her head?”
—Shane (13:03)
“If you have sex during Smosh Read’s Reddit Stories, please put yourself in the comments. Say I am the silent majority.”
—Angela (03:22)
“Emotions are not facts.”
—Courtney, attributing to advice from her therapist (64:38)
“Update, she ran.”
—Courtney & Angela (several instances, e.g. 27:21, 41:05, 86:07), recurring episode punchline
This episode encapsulates the playful, honest, and empathetic energy of the Smosh cast:
A perfect listen for fans seeking both catharsis and amusement from the wildest corners of online relationships—on Valentine’s Day, or any day you just want to feel a little less alone in the messiness of love.