Josh Sharp is in His Body

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Josh Sharp is in His Body" on So True with Caleb Hearon

Release Date: December 26, 2024

In this engaging episode of So True with Caleb Hearon, host Caleb Heron welcomes comedian Josh Sharp for an insightful and humorous conversation about identity, body positivity, relationships, and personal growth. The episode delves deep into Josh's experiences and perspectives, offering listeners a candid look into navigating modern life as a gay comedian.

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1. Revisiting Nostalgia and Pop Culture

The episode opens with Caleb reminiscing about watching the 1990s Disney live-action adaptation of The Three Musketeers, highlighting Tim Curry's memorable villainous role. Josh shares his nostalgic connection to the film, reflecting on childhood memories and the timeless appeal of certain characters.

Notable Quote:

• Caleb Heron [00:32]: "The 1990s Disney live-action Three Musketeers... Tim Curry plays a villain that's both devilish and charismatic."

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2. Gender Pronouns and Social Perceptions

A significant portion of the conversation centers around gender pronouns and their impact on societal behaviors. Josh humorously critiques the prevalence of "he/him" pronouns associated with negative actions, questioning cultural stereotypes.

Notable Quote:

• Josh Sharp [03:40]: "Why are there so much murder in the he/him community?"
• Caleb Heron [04:09]: "Honestly, it's about how we perceive ourselves and others through these pronouns."

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3. Body Positivity: LA vs. New York

Caleb and Josh explore the differing attitudes toward body image in Los Angeles compared to New York City. Caleb expresses frustration with the pervasive body negativity in LA, contrasting it with a more accepting environment in New York.

Notable Quotes:

• Caleb Heron [21:22]: "New Yorkers are getting down with different body types. In LA, people are actively negative about their own bodies."
• Josh Sharp [22:18]: "Certain spaces, especially in gay communities, can perpetuate body obsession to the detriment of self-esteem."

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4. Navigating Modern Dating

The duo shares personal anecdotes about using dating apps like Grindr, discussing the overwhelming influx of images and the desire for genuine connections beyond superficial appearances.

Notable Quote:

• Caleb Heron [18:09]: "I don't like when I'm on Grindr and someone wants to send me 15 pictures of every angle of their naked body before we meet up."
• Josh Sharp [19:10]: "I want an album that's vibes. How do we get vibes?"

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5. Embracing Dance and Community

Josh delves into his passion for line dancing and how it fosters a sense of community and body awareness. Caleb highlights the therapeutic aspect of dance, emphasizing its role in being present and connected.

Notable Quote:

• Josh Sharp [15:28]: "House music is like a social dance... it's about being in your body and being in communion with others."
• Caleb Heron [16:58]: "Reclaiming a bit of that country fried, Southern western thing feels right."

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6. Musical Tastes and Personal Memories

Music serves as a backdrop for reflecting on personal histories and emotional milestones. Caleb shares her admiration for Frank Ocean's "Godspeed," while Josh reminisces about live records and favorite songs that resonate deeply with him.

Notable Quote:

• Caleb Heron [62:53]: "Godspeed by Frank Ocean is a song that came at such an important time in my life when I was massively depressed."
• Josh Sharp [62:54]: "Tears for Fears' 'Everybody Wants to Rule the World'... if I wrote that 40 years ago, I'd say, we're good."

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7. Philosophical Musings on Consciousness

The conversation takes a philosophical turn as Josh discusses theories of consciousness, referencing Hofstadter's strange loop theory. Caleb contrasts Josh's deep dives with her own preference for lighter, more immediate sources of happiness.

Notable Quote:

• Josh Sharp [41:20]: "Your brain is oscillating between the small and the big at all times, creating an infinite loop that becomes the self."
• Caleb Heron [42:43]: "My happiness is based in simplicity. I avoid and deny the heavy stuff."

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8. Humor and Relationship Dynamics

Caleb and Josh infuse their discussion with humor, particularly when envisioning collaborative projects like traveling road trips or rewriting the Bible. Their playful banter underscores the strong rapport and mutual respect they share.

Notable Quote:

• Caleb Heron [66:10]: "I'm rewriting the Christian Bible... He/hims will be centered just because that's me."
• Josh Sharp [68:33]: "We should start a religion. I'll pretend to do a podcast with him. We'll just spend some time together."

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9. Final Thoughts and Reflections

As the episode winds down, Caleb and Josh reflect on the importance of community, authenticity, and self-acceptance. They encourage listeners to embrace their true selves and find joy in genuine connections.

Notable Quote:

• Caleb Heron [67:50]: "Bones keep us upright. Without them, we'd be twisted."
• Josh Sharp [73:55]: "Breakfast at McDonald's or a fresh pastry with hand-cut fruit – it's all about context and what brings you joy."

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Conclusion

"So True with Caleb Hearon" featuring Josh Sharp offers a blend of humor, introspection, and heartfelt conversation. From dissecting societal norms around gender and body image to sharing personal journeys in dance and music, Caleb and Josh provide listeners with a relatable and entertaining exploration of what it means to be true to oneself in today's world.

Transcript

[Caleb Heron]

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[Josh Sharp]

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[Caleb Heron]

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[Josh Sharp]

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[Caleb Heron]

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[Josh Sharp]

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[Caleb Heron]

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[Josh Sharp]

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[Caleb Heron]

Taxes and fees and $10 device connection charge phones via 24 monthly bill credits for well qualified customers. Contact us before canceling entire account to continue bill credits or credit stop and balance on a required financ bill. Credits end if you pay off devices early. CT mobile.com the holidays are all about sharing with family meals, couches, stories, Grandma's secret pecan pie recipe. And now you can also share a cart. With Instacart family carts, everyone can add what they want to one group cart from wherever they are. So you don't have to go from room to room to find out who wants cranberry sauce or whether you should get mini marshmallows for the yams or collecting votes for sugar cookies versus shortbread. Or just share a cart and then share the meals in the moments. Download the Instacart app and get delivery in as fast as 30 minutes. Plus enjoy free delivery on your first three orders. Service fees and terms apply. We should do a show together. But you're too busy. You'd never do a show.

[Josh Sharp]

Sweeney, Pot, Kettle. Don't even.

[Caleb Heron]

You'd never do a show with me.

[Josh Sharp]

Don't even. I literally asked you to do a show before we rolled. You said no. Sorry to pull back the curtain.

[Caleb Heron]

You know what I just rewatched?

[Josh Sharp]

What?

[Caleb Heron]

The 1990s Disney live action Three Musketeers.

[Josh Sharp]

Wow.

[Caleb Heron]

Did you ever watch that?

[Josh Sharp]

Yes, but not since I was a little boy.

[Caleb Heron]

I know. It's like Kiefer Sutherland, Charlie Sheen, Chris O'Donnell, Oliver Platt, who I love. I remember though, as a kid, there's this. There's this. Well, Tim Curry plays a villain.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. And first of all, one of the hottest men. We have Tim Curry sex.

[Caleb Heron]

So devilish serve sex. There's like a. There's like a moment where. Where maybe it's Charlie Sheen is like, enjoy your time in hell. And goes to stab him. And then Tim Curry pulls out a gun and shoots him and goes, you first. And then like, what? And I was like.

[Josh Sharp]

But I remember watching for hot too.

[Caleb Heron]

Kiefer hot.

[Josh Sharp]

You watched 24 growing up in the heartland.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm sure I did not watch 24.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, down south. We were obsessed with it.

[Caleb Heron]

We were watching 24.

[Josh Sharp]

You know, the towers had just fallen. 24 was everything to us.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, you were watching 24 in North Carolina. You were locked in.

[Josh Sharp]

What else would you talk about? Around the locker. The cooler.

[Caleb Heron]

Locker. Water cooler. That's the phrase on the locker.

[Josh Sharp]

Surrounding the locker in a tight circle.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, I. But both. There were two bad. There were. Okay, so Tim Curry, big bad guy.

[Josh Sharp]

Big. One of the biggest and baddest.

[Caleb Heron]

And then there's like a running gag where D'Artagnan has slept with this guy's sister and he's trying to kill.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, that's not nice.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, you can't sleep with someone's sister.

[Josh Sharp]

That's his sister. That's not right.

[Caleb Heron]

Don't sleep with someone's sister. You guys, that's wrong.

[Josh Sharp]

Ask.

[Caleb Heron]

First ask the brother and then the dad and then any other men that she might.

[Josh Sharp]

Especially in that era. Yes, that was how you did things.

[Caleb Heron]

That's how I still do things now.

[Josh Sharp]

You might ask their lesbian moms.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes.

[Josh Sharp]

It's not always asking the dad anymore.

[Caleb Heron]

Golly. And in. That's in that telling.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Now it's. Now there's. Now there's two moms instead of a protective brother. You know, I don't sleep with women because I got tired of asking so much permission. I'm like, I don't want to take your dad.

[Josh Sharp]

It's exhausting.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh my goodness.

[Josh Sharp]

How many hands am I going to ask for? You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Let me just. Your son.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Say that cuz no one's checking in on him.

[Josh Sharp]

The dads don't want to know, Quite frankly.

[Caleb Heron]

No. And they don't.

[Josh Sharp]

Boys will be boys. These dads are saying about that stuff.

[Caleb Heron]

But the guy, the guy who wants to kill Dartini for sleeping with his sister, his energy is also very like Tim Curry.

[Josh Sharp]

It's always a he him who wants to kill. First of all, let's say that first of all, the guy who wants to kill. That's he him behavior.

[Caleb Heron]

Can we just say most murder. He him. He him perpetrated by he him Get.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't know, Ben Shapiro talking about that. Why. Why are there so much murder in the he him community?

[Caleb Heron]

Why is there so much he him?

[Josh Sharp]

What is it about the he him culture?

[Caleb Heron]

You know what? My mom worked in a women's prison as a nurse.

[Josh Sharp]

Really?

[Caleb Heron]

Every woman in there justified. No one in there did something evil just for evil.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, maybe two people. First, I'm the judge. Someone's up for murder. First question I asked what are your pronouns?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And not out of politeness. To know whether to let you free or not.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Leniency. Tell me this.

[Josh Sharp]

No. Whether to grant clemency. Clemency.

[Caleb Heron]

Clemency. Women, she.

[Josh Sharp]

Women, she.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm granting women.

[Josh Sharp]

See, I'm glad. I'm granting women she to you.

[Caleb Heron]

It just sucks that you got Clemens.

[Josh Sharp]

Because that was the better one. Yeah, I know.

[Caleb Heron]

I had no choice but to riff in the lower direction.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. In post. You could put that one first.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

That could be what tees up mine. Everybody goes, well, Caleb really set him up for that.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. It's just hard riffing with you because you'll get the best one first.

[Josh Sharp]

That's that UCB training.

[Caleb Heron]

UCB. Thank you. What was UCB's theme? Character or game? It was game.

[Josh Sharp]

Game.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, God.

[Josh Sharp]

You're thinking Chicago again. The heartland.

[Caleb Heron]

Can't help it.

[Josh Sharp]

Y'all love character and more.

[Caleb Heron]

That's where I came more, honey. That's where I came up.

[Josh Sharp]

Yep. We're thinking about character down south. We were doing games down south in.

[Caleb Heron]

Manhattan, under a Gristeedis.

[Josh Sharp]

God, I miss that era.

[Caleb Heron]

Golly. Can we bring it back?

[Josh Sharp]

You were IO.

[Caleb Heron]

I was IO.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know this. I used to. Every fall break, we're rolling, right? Oh, yeah. Every fall break, my college troop would get in on Wednesday so we could see TJ and Dave leave on Sunday so we could catch improvise Shakes. We'd go on fall break, and we'd always be like, we gotta get there Wednesday for TJ and Dave, and then we'll see Shakes on Saturday, and then we'll leave Sunday morning.

[Caleb Heron]

And just for the uninitiated, Shakes is gonna go ahead and be improvise Shakespeare. Yeah. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. Men and blouses. Why not?

[Josh Sharp]

Why not? At last, as a judge, me exhaling closet 19, Thomas Middleditch in a skirt. Do you know what? Something. I was telling this to a friend recently because I also identify as charming.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I love to be the friend's wingman. Like, you're me. Like, I love to be the friend that, when you're new plus one, is sort of like coming out to be the one who's so fun that they're like, your friends are fun. And also, little do you know, UCB training. I'm teeing you up all night to look funny. You know what I mean? That's one of the best things, is to charm a friend's date.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You're into being, like, welcome to the Coven. You picked the right one. You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

I would love to bring you.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, honey, not only would I be so fun, I would make you look so good. And they'd walk away. The illusion that would never be. You know, they would not know how much work it took for us to, like, sort of make this happen.

[Caleb Heron]

Josh, you know, can I tell you something really funny?

[Josh Sharp]

Anything that I haven't told you yet? Sugar, please.

[Caleb Heron]

Sugar. I've been big on sugar lately.

[Josh Sharp]

I know we were talking about. The sugar's good. I sort of forgot about it.

[Caleb Heron]

I sugared a straight man recently.

[Josh Sharp]

And how did they receive it?

[Caleb Heron]

He wasn't into it. Yeah, but. Which is crazy, because sugar is such a delightful thing.

[Josh Sharp]

But you can't sugar. Well, you know, everybody's against big sugar now.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, well, it all goes straight to the hips.

[Josh Sharp]

Thank you. And. And what's the problem with that? Well, being fat's where you bear children.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, my God. We should bear children together.

[Josh Sharp]

We would be such fun parents.

[Caleb Heron]

Wait, but on that note, I have to tell you something. See, this is the issue. We're going to get lost a lot. I've already lost the plot on the d'artanian thread. There's four.

[Josh Sharp]

There's six threads.

[Caleb Heron]

We've.

[Josh Sharp]

I've got them all here. We'll. We'll circle it back at the end.

[Caleb Heron]

By the way, I just did Zwe's show, and I said, what would be my nightmare podcast? And I said, me and some gay guys I'm really close with because we'll get so far from reality so quick. Guess what? We're in. We're talking about children together.

[Josh Sharp]

Here we are. Absolutely.

[Caleb Heron]

Okay. But then the other night, you came. You came to a thing that I was going to.

[Josh Sharp]

Yes.

[Caleb Heron]

At a bar. I don't want to say what it is, because I go sometimes. I want people to come. Yes, but you came and you met my friend Carly, who's lovely.

[Josh Sharp]

I was. I was taken.

[Caleb Heron]

We love. Oh, everyone's taken by Carly, and everyone's taken by you. When. When the next day she and I are talking on the phone, she goes. She goes, I loved Josh.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, well, we love to hear that.

[Caleb Heron]

I go, well, yes, I love Josh, too. And she goes, I think you guys are in love.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, we. How much do we want to get into it? We were saying off air that this has happened quick. When it's right, it's right.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know, we sort of had a beautiful lunch and knew. Well, we're friends now.

[Caleb Heron]

That's what it is.

[Josh Sharp]

That's not always how it happens.

[Caleb Heron]

Exactly correct. And I thought that was a beautiful thing that she said.

[Josh Sharp]

That's beautiful.

[Caleb Heron]

I said, that is my.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't refute the allegations.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't refute the allegations. I'm in love with you.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm in love with you. I don't deny it.

[Caleb Heron]

Hello.

[Josh Sharp]

I'll say it right to the judge.

[Caleb Heron]

Hello. Well, that's another thing. I want to talk about your judge. Eric, you said that you would give leniency based on pronouns. Will you just go through the pronouns and tell me what sentences you're kind of thinking generally?

[Josh Sharp]

Great point. Well, he him is, you know, abolished prison, but only after we send all the he hims there. Of course. He hims are going right to the. To some island. He him island. Yeah, I'm sending them all to he him island.

[Caleb Heron]

He him island.

[Josh Sharp]

The carceral state is on one island and it's for he.

[Caleb Heron]

I think they have one of those off the coast of South Carolina, don't they?

[Josh Sharp]

Probably. I mean, I'm basically inventing a men's prison right now, is what I'm saying.

[Caleb Heron]

You're like, I've got an idea. It's called he him Island. It's like, yeah, I think that's called Sing Sing. They've got that.

[Josh Sharp]

What do you think? Non binary people. I'm sending non binary people into the community.

[Caleb Heron]

Into the community.

[Josh Sharp]

And it's not for them. It's for the community.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. What are you doing out there?

[Josh Sharp]

They're just engaging.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, if, hey, if experience is any. Any measure, they're firing for Greenpeace. That's what they're doing.

[Josh Sharp]

We would all be better to have. Knock, knock at the door. Hello. Who are you? I'm a non binary person sitting here to talk to you.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, we should start a program like that. You know how Mormon teens open up those letters and they're like, yeah, Uruguay. You know, we should do that with non binary people.

[Josh Sharp]

Rum Springer, Rum Vima. You know, not as good as some clement she, but we're working on it.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah. Them spring up. Actually, probably the stronger one.

[Josh Sharp]

There we go.

[Caleb Heron]

So this time I get the lead on the riff. Okay, so you're they them. You're sending them into the community.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, yeah. What are you going to do with.

[Caleb Heron]

She her she her. That was a problem for guys like us.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. I mean, earlier, we're already dabbling in clemency. Maybe they're all free. They shouldn't be there in the first place, honestly.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, you think women go Free.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Really at last.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, my God.

[Josh Sharp]

Let's free women cry. You are crying right now, baby. Do you see this? Yeah, I'm afraid some of the wires are going to short circuit. Chance, can we get something to mop all this up? Caleb is weeping just the. There's water everywhere. Oh, my God.

[Caleb Heron]

She, her freedom. I've got everything, baby.

[Josh Sharp]

Have a sip of Sprite. Zero sugar. Come on, make it. Make it right. Zero sugar. See, you're against sugar, too. Here you are saying, oh, nobody wants to use sugar anymore. Proudly, proudly saying, zero sugar right there.

[Caleb Heron]

Sick. Don't bring this up. They're gonna turn on me.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, my God.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, she got freedom. Audre Lorde.

[Josh Sharp]

Audrey Lord. Thank you. Mariam Caba. Send the women home.

[Caleb Heron]

Judith Butler.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, there we go.

[Caleb Heron]

She, her, freedom.

[Josh Sharp]

There we go.

[Caleb Heron]

Are you doing a they?

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

You don't have a they on there at all? Not a he? Not the slightest touch of a he? They?

[Josh Sharp]

No. No. But I feel very sort of like, pronoun, agnostic, where it's like, it's sort of fun to accept all. Even though I know it's like I'm a boy. But if you. If you want to use any, I'm gonna be like, sure.

[Caleb Heron]

Do you feel like a man? Like, if someone says, like, if someone says, like, man, do you. Cuz I do. I feel like. I feel like a guy.

[Josh Sharp]

That's a great question. Because then right now I went. I don't really, but.

[Caleb Heron]

Right.

[Josh Sharp]

But yet I do feel like I'm he him.

[Caleb Heron]

Maybe.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm somewhat going like. I just feel like y'all have all decided I'm he him, so I'll take it.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, that's it.

[Josh Sharp]

You feel like a guy.

[Caleb Heron]

I do. I think I feel. But I don't really know what that means. It just. It's never felt dysphoric to me to be. To be a boy.

[Josh Sharp]

I guess that's true. I don't feel dysphoric being a boy. I just feel like a certain type of slinky Tim Curry boy, you know?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Well, you're. You're like. You have like an ethereal queerness.

[Josh Sharp]

Thank you.

[Caleb Heron]

I really don't. My queerness is very. Just kind of like. My queerness is just kind of, you know.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. I don't see that really. But I guess maybe it's the heartland of all. You lead with heartland.

[Caleb Heron]

I lead with heartland. You think I lead with heartland and not queer?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Don't you think you read with queer, North Carolina? Because to me, I See the North Carolina and you.

[Josh Sharp]

So presently, I find it's all malleable.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. That interesting.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, I'm around certain people and I don't mean to, but the North Carolina.

[Caleb Heron]

Like, slides, jumps, jumps, jumps on out of you.

[Josh Sharp]

It is that thing where I guess we all naturally mirror each other, but there's certain times where I catch myself and I'm like, oh, well, first of all, I look at videos of me as a little boy and I'm like, you were such a little hick.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Where did that go? Yeah, you know, like. Because it wasn't really a choice. It just sort of went away.

[Caleb Heron]

It's so.

[Josh Sharp]

Clearly, it's still there. Because there's times I'm talking to people and I end up being like this. I'm talking like this, and I'm like, what happened to you? You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So it's all reflexive, don't you think? In the same way we clean out with certain people, you know, it's like.

[Caleb Heron]

I guess we do sort of hiccup.

[Josh Sharp]

Hick out.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm hicking out.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, we're hitting. Great line dance to that.

[Caleb Heron]

You better it.

[Josh Sharp]

There's a great line dance to that.

[Caleb Heron]

Jason Aldean made some great country music in the 2000s. And then he.

[Josh Sharp]

Where'd he go?

[Caleb Heron]

Well, I think he.

[Josh Sharp]

I bet the answer is bleak. I don't want to look it up.

[Caleb Heron]

Isn't he the one that put out Spit in the cop's Face, Burn the Flag? Try that in a small town.

[Josh Sharp]

He's that one.

[Caleb Heron]

I think that's him.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, my God. And here we are line dancing to his song right now. Is that reclamation or should we be not. I don't even know.

[Caleb Heron]

His old songs were so good.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

And then he got in the. It's same with Toby Keith. Toby Keith was making all these guys, they make such good country music. And then they get obsessed with, like, their own iconography.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

And the, like, who they're for.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

And then they start doing this weirdo, like, fascistic, like, fucking creepy shit.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Like fudgeing. What was that. What was that Jason Aldine song? It was like, why do you want to keep. What is. It was like one of his. Really got what I got. Burning it down. You make it easy. Try that in a small town. Sick.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, I forgot. I didn't put those two together. That he's the guy. That was. Because I remember that kerfuffle.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't really listen to the song. I just remember it, like, being in the news.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, my God. Tattoos on this town. You know that one?

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, okay, I'm. I grew up in a. What kind of country were you listening to growing up?

[Josh Sharp]

Not a lot, because I was listening to radio country, but I didn't really like it.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm, like, reclaiming radio country now as. As I'm getting into queer line dancing. And there's a lot of, like, good stuff happening right now. But I was big into, like, folksy bluegrass stuff.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

There used to be the public radio station. 89.3. Whatever. The, like, Asheville boonies public radio station on Sundays was called Coming Round the Mountain. And they just play like, old folk, and I loved that shit.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And my brother plays mandolin, so I like that stuff.

[Caleb Heron]

Your brother's a very talented musician.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what the first concert I ever saw was?

[Caleb Heron]

What?

[Josh Sharp]

Actually, let's take it back. First concert was a contemporary Christian act, the Newsboys. Does that mean anything to you?

[Caleb Heron]

Thank you.

[Josh Sharp]

Does that mean entertaining angels by the light of my TV screen? They were Australian and they loved Christ sort of more than anything. Yeah. But the first secular concert, Nickel Creek.

[Caleb Heron]

Wow.

[Josh Sharp]

On their first album at the Asheville Civic Center.

[Caleb Heron]

Wow.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, Lighthouse had just come out.

[Caleb Heron]

Country boy.

[Josh Sharp]

Yes. But I feel like I was more into that sort of side of it because I was still, like. I was an emerging music snob.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So, like, even in that climate, I was a little, like, country's bad, but, like, have you heard. Have you heard folk? You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So I didn't grow up on a lot of country, but you did have to sort of speak the language.

[Caleb Heron]

How'd you get into queer line dancing? You're doing that all the time. I can't. Oh, my God. I can't get you to go to dinner.

[Josh Sharp]

It's true.

[Caleb Heron]

Half the time I'm afflicted because you're doing queer line dancing 17 times a goddamn week.

[Josh Sharp]

I own that. I'm afflicted.

[Caleb Heron]

I've had it.

[Josh Sharp]

I need to be. Send me to He Him Island. I need to be locked up for my crime.

[Caleb Heron]

He Him Island. And there won't be any line dancing on He Him Island.

[Josh Sharp]

No, ma'am.

[Caleb Heron]

No.

[Josh Sharp]

Just some gay people I knew in LA were like, posting videos, and I was like, that looks fun. And then I went in the spring with some friends, and then I kept going, and my friends don't go anymore. And I made friends who do it. Do you know what I mean? I was like, y'all don't. Y'all y'all aren't as down bad as me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, you were sick with it immediately.

[Josh Sharp]

I'll see some of my friends who went early and be like, have you learned the dances? And they're like, yeah, I think I know four or five. And then in my head I'm like, shit, I think I know 90. You know, not a joke. Like, the other day I checked the playlist of every one I know and it's almost 100. And I was like, you're down bad.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, you're sick. You're.

[Josh Sharp]

You want to get into that because you've gone.

[Caleb Heron]

I have. I went to. I went to stud country in L. A. A few times. I dug it.

[Josh Sharp]

Fabulous. And there's a whole ecosystem now of like, that party and all these other things.

[Caleb Heron]

Ye.

[Josh Sharp]

Clearly something's happening.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And it's like. Cause, you know, like, western is in. In the culture. Broadly.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know, I mean, like, everybody's making country albums. Like, western wear is in. And fashion. It's very devil wear. Us. Prada. Like, you think that's blue, that's cerulean. Like, this was chosen for you.

[Caleb Heron]

This was chosen for you by us a long time ago.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Western has been chosen for this moment. So it's like no surprise that the in Bushwick are like line dancing to hick town wearing wraparound sunglasses. Like, it's all a part of a broader thing, clearly.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

But it is hitting spots for me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, it's like it is making me go. And clearly there's something in the air before this. Like, Beyonce put out 16 carriages. Did I tell you this? And when it came out, I was playing it in the shower, like, weeping, like, remembering little, like, hick seven year old me. Like, it was like making me like, revisit parts of my little, like, closeted Southern past in a way not that I had. Like, I don't actually don't have much shame for that part. But certainly it's things where you feel like, I've moved on. I'm this hip New York person now, and I was like, living in some of that old stuff in a way that I hadn't been in a while already. And so then when this thing came in my life, I was like, one. I like being in my body and I love just like turning my brain off and putting information in my body. And it's very queer to have this thing where it's like, I. Because some of them you can find YouTube's online, some of them you truly can't. And you have to Be like, hey, do you know Stetson? Will you meet me in the park and teach me? And then some is like, I have this information in my body. I will transmit to your body. Something about that is very beautiful and queer to me. But then also there's an aspect where I'm like, I don't know why, but like reclaiming a little bit of that like country fried, Southern western thing is feeling right.

[Caleb Heron]

That's beautiful.

[Josh Sharp]

That was a diatribe. I can.

[Caleb Heron]

Beautiful diatribe. We'll be keeping it in. I think there's. It is half the time beautiful, half the time devastating. That no matter what you do, you can't escape who you were when you were seven.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, it's.

[Caleb Heron]

It's there. It's just like a huge. It's a huge, massive.

[Josh Sharp]

And right now I'm living in the beautiful era.

[Caleb Heron]

And I'm often in the beautiful era, personally. But only in the recent years. Like I would say in my teens and early twenties. I was so annoyed by where I was from and I was like, oh, God, this is such an unchic like thing that I was just fucking born into. I wish I had been born somewhere cool. Like my friends who were born in Manhattan and went to museums.

[Josh Sharp]

But now I'm so grateful for it.

[Caleb Heron]

Exactly correct. Now I'm. Now it's my favorite thing about me. But it took some work.

[Josh Sharp]

But clearly I'm in some sort of like Saturn returns about all that stuff. Well, and also, not that we have to get into it, but like, you know, I had this like weird accident beginning of the year where it was like a near death type of thing. So I think it was like coming off of that too, that I felt very like, I need to be in my body. That was like the first move was I was like. I started taking dance classes because I was like, I want to be in my body more.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And then I think it became a sort of trickle down where then I. It led me to that. And then it was hitting all these like emotional spots that I was like, oh, I didn't expect this to be a part of it, but it's a.

[Caleb Heron]

Part of it on the body of it all. Do you know what I've gotten really unhappy with?

[Josh Sharp]

What?

[Caleb Heron]

I don't like when I'm on Grindr and someone wants to send me 15 pictures of every angle of their naked body before we meet up. I don't need that.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't want to share. I want it. Could they. For vibes.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't want. I Don't need to see all that body.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't need to.

[Josh Sharp]

I need, like one picture to get, like a general idea.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes. I know literally kind of what's going on, but, like just.

[Josh Sharp]

Just mostly so I'm not surprised, good or bad.

[Caleb Heron]

I want to get to know your.

[Josh Sharp]

Body better than I expect. I'm also like, oh, no. Like, I get scared.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. I don't want the fucking album, but.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't need all that. I want an album that's vibes. How do we get vibes?

[Caleb Heron]

How do we get vibes in the album? I want to know what it's going to be like to chit chat with you before and after. I want to, like, figure out your body together and I want you to figure out mine. I don't.

[Josh Sharp]

You ever send voice memos on.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, absolutely.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't really do that, but maybe I should, because that's the best vibe check.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. To get someone's voice and just like.

[Josh Sharp]

Because you get all the intonation, you get context, you know, I mean, you get. You get tone, you get timing, you get jokes. Like, in 15 seconds of you talking, I'm going to learn more than an hour of us texting. Don't you feel.

[Caleb Heron]

Absolutely.

[Josh Sharp]

There's so much subtext there.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm gonna figure out what's going on with you.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

What your vibe is. I had a delightful. I messaged with a guy on Grindr last week. We messaged like four messages. And then he came over and I was. We didn't exchange any nudes, which I love. That's my favorite kind of hook up. I don't want to know really beforehand, personally. And then he came over and I was so shocked by his vibe. He. I thought he was going to be like. I thought he was going to be very femme, which I was. I'm. I'm down. I thought, he's gonna be very femme. And I was like, cool, cool. That's what's coming over. And then he got there. He was like, pretty masculine and pretty low key. I thought he was gonna be, like, pretty erratic based on some of the messages.

[Josh Sharp]

Did you like that too, though?

[Caleb Heron]

I love it. I love it all. I love it all. I was down with it. I was like, that's hot. That's cool.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Because he was nice and fun. We talked.

[Josh Sharp]

They give too much. Boy. It doesn't work for me.

[Caleb Heron]

That doesn't work for you.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. With exception. I mean, everything has huge caveats. Of course, this. I'm painting with a broad stroke, but yeah, man, Is something where I go, I don't know what to do with this. I don't know what to do with this.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm down with whatever, but I love that for you, I'm done with whatever. Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Are you finding. Well, this is. This is so boring.

[Caleb Heron]

No, it's not. What is it?

[Josh Sharp]

I'm not asking is native. Is dating better in New York than L. A? What I want, but it's going to sound like it, but I want to find, like, are you finding an energy shift as you're swimming in the New York pool?

[Caleb Heron]

You asking me if dating is better in New York or L. A is like, it would be equivalent to you asking me, is it better to go on a long, beautiful walk or be shot in the head?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, exactly. That's what I figured. I was trying to like, think of, like, there's something more interesting than that part, that part of the question. It's like, what is. What are. What is energies are you noticing that are different there?

[Caleb Heron]

Here's what I will say there is in New York, I love LA as a city. I really don't. I do not subscribe to LA hate. I think la, wonderful city with. With some drawbacks, and every city has them.

[Josh Sharp]

This one has profound drawbacks.

[Caleb Heron]

This has profound.

[Josh Sharp]

They're both insane. And if you don't own that, you're delusional.

[Caleb Heron]

People are people. My friends are so being so annoying to me now in New York that are like, we told all that you talked on New York, and I'm like, everything I said about New York is still true. It is still prohibitively expensive and small and loud, and it's crowded and smells like piss, and it's also lovely. I mean, it's. I'm living in. I'm existing in many realities, as we all do L. A versus New York dating. There are a lot of differences. Here are the two that stick out to me, okay, New York, they love a big boy.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

New Yorkers are getting down with different body types. And truly, genuinely, in la, people are not getting down with different body types. People are actively the. The vibe around body in la, even in people I like friends of mine who I'm not trying to fuck friends of mine, the way they talk about their own body, I'm like, do you even realize the implications that that has really surprised me.

[Josh Sharp]

But of course, you're getting like a different point of view on it than I am, you know, I mean, of course, so.

[Caleb Heron]

And they're being. By the way, these are even people I like that are being Careful. Because they know how I feel about body negativity, but they're being so gross and negative about their own body, even in ways they don't understand. I'm like, you don't even know how much I hate the idea. Like, you hate your. You hate your physical form and you. You actively hate fat people and you don't even realize it. And that's kind of sad. New York, Less of that. Not to say there's not body hatred and weird shit in New York.

[Josh Sharp]

No, of course. And certain. In certain spaces, especially human gay spaces.

[Caleb Heron]

Of course. Yeah. God. God help me if I had to go to some of the houses on Fire island with some of these people.

[Josh Sharp]

Truly.

[Caleb Heron]

But that's one. And the second is I think there's a higher premium in New York on intellect. I think people want to. I think in. I think in New York there's a little bit more of like, what are you listening to? What are you reading? And like a genuine. Like, I want to know what you're.

[Josh Sharp]

What are we going to talk about after we've got.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, we come. Yeah. Once we. Once we wipe the. Come off with that little towel when.

[Josh Sharp]

I do cursory come wipe. Yeah. I'm still a little sticky. Pre shower. What are we talking about for 15 minutes?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. What book did you read recently? Now that we've come.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, yeah. But then nobody's asking about books in la, kind of.

[Caleb Heron]

No. And I. It sounds like I'm like, even saying this. I'm like. It sounds like I'm working from some stereotype that was told to me of, like, they don't like fat people and they don't read books.

[Josh Sharp]

No, it's lived. But I'm like, it's live.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm just telling you what I've experienced. It's lived, it's real, it's true and genuine. So, yeah. Higher premium on intellect. And they like fat people, which is good for me.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

[Caleb Heron]

Better for me.

[Josh Sharp]

The body obsession. I was about to say. It's like so funny because we're talking about being in the body and in some ways they're like incredibly in their body, but, like, to the. To ill effect.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

It's weird.

[Caleb Heron]

And I've gotten tired of the LA face. I've gotten tired of the work. I've gotten tired. I've. I'm sorry. I know. Everyone, do your own thing. It's supposed to be whatever makes you happy.

[Josh Sharp]

Lizzo says, love yourself.

[Caleb Heron]

Everybody. Everybody with the facework, the actors, everybody in movies. Looks ridiculous now. They look insane. I am begging people to just let yourself age. My God.

[Josh Sharp]

Or. Or I sort of like, if you go, like, full Madonna, go crazy.

[Caleb Heron]

Sure.

[Josh Sharp]

But then we're trying to read her for it, as if she's trying to not look like that. I was like, she's not trying to, like, hide her age. She's trying to look like Amanda Lepore. And I sort of celebrate that. You're like, I've created myself as art object. Really?

[Caleb Heron]

I think, go nuts. Do whatever you need to do. For you personally, I think we don't need to have every actor in every movie look like that.

[Josh Sharp]

It's the uncanny Valley.

[Caleb Heron]

It's insane.

[Josh Sharp]

Do it or don't.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, Go nuts.

[Josh Sharp]

Don't do this. Like, I just happen to be this way. No, you don't.

[Caleb Heron]

No, you don't. That's fake.

[Josh Sharp]

No, you don't.

[Caleb Heron]

Fix your face up. Jane Fonda. A lot of work. Looks great.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Nuts.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Looks like a fake face, but it's like she knows what she's doing. She likes it.

[Josh Sharp]

Absolutely. Get her back on top of a tank with that. With that new face.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, why not? Well, be careful up there, though.

[Josh Sharp]

Be careful.

[Caleb Heron]

At this age, it's not the same.

[Josh Sharp]

That's true.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't like the work. The work is bothering me. I don't like seeing it on my screen. Every movie trailer now, I'm like, that's not. That's not a person.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

They're like, this woman is. They're like, this woman is a downtrodden gas station employee in Kentucky. I'm like, she's got veneers.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, exactly.

[Caleb Heron]

What's going on?

[Josh Sharp]

Insurance ain't covering that.

[Caleb Heron]

I know, honey.

[Josh Sharp]

So she's got money.

[Caleb Heron]

No, it can't be. It can't be.

[Josh Sharp]

Veneers. Veneers are hard for me.

[Caleb Heron]

I get it. I'm not saying I wouldn't do it. I'm just like, does everyone need to have the same teeth?

[Josh Sharp]

They just. They do look like big Chiclet horse teeth. I see them a mile away.

[Caleb Heron]

I kind of like my fucked up teeth.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, Mine are, like, minorly fucked up, and I'm down for it.

[Caleb Heron]

This one's pushed back. These ones are a little crooked.

[Josh Sharp]

My bottoms are crowded.

[Caleb Heron]

I kind of like it.

[Josh Sharp]

Dennis keeps telling me, you know, your bottoms are getting crowded. I go, sweetie. Yeah. Hello.

[Caleb Heron]

Every party in New York.

[Josh Sharp]

Every party in. Crowded with bottoms.

[Caleb Heron]

Crowded bottoms. What is this, horse meat disco?

[Josh Sharp]

Come on, now.

[Caleb Heron]

Come on.

[Josh Sharp]

But I'm cool with it.

[Caleb Heron]

Crowded bottoms Is this the eagle?

[Josh Sharp]

Do you go to the eagle?

[Caleb Heron]

Your dentist goes, oh, very fun. Just goes, oh, Josh, I love that.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, you gay guys. I love to get in that mouth.

[Caleb Heron]

Sweetie, pull back.

[Josh Sharp]

Line up.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, my God, Josh, knock it off. Back in close to the hygienist.

[Josh Sharp]

Cancel my next three appointments. We're running long again. Me size queen. He's got gay voice, too, for some reason.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

He's got 1950s Hollywood Center Square gay voice. Oh, yeah. Oh, God.

[Caleb Heron]

Cancel my root canal. Josh wants to do a top five. He's Margaret Martindale. I'm trying to clean your teeth, sweetie.

[Josh Sharp]

Shut up and let me scrape.

[Caleb Heron]

Honey, if I wanted to hear you talk, I'd shove my hand up your ass and work. Yaka puppet. Hush.

[Josh Sharp]

Okay. When people are like, you know that question of, like, what role on Broadway? What do you do? I'm going to now say Little Shop, and I'm the dentist.

[Caleb Heron]

But he's a. Yeah, Dennis from Little Shop. Do you have any questions? If so, direct them to my publicist. I'm not talking to you about it until I'm cast. What is your dream role?

[Josh Sharp]

I don't actually have an answer for that.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, stop it.

[Josh Sharp]

No, I really don't. That's why I was thinking of it recently. Why it came up where I realized I was like, I don't have a go to in the theater space. I like a lot of theater, but there's not one that I need to have that answer. Don't I? Do you have one?

[Caleb Heron]

No. Yeah, no, I'm just the interviewer.

[Josh Sharp]

One exists somewhere, but I haven't found it. Sound off in the comments, I guess.

[Caleb Heron]

Sound off in the comments of what? Josh should play on Broadway.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, but I don't know. I don't have one. Are you much of a theater queen?

[Caleb Heron]

No, I enjoy. I go when my friends are in something, but I'm not. It's never been. I'm not. I. I didn't do it in high school, and then when I got to college, I started hanging out with a lot of theater kids, Chance included.

[Josh Sharp]

Y'all know each other from that.

[Caleb Heron]

From college? Yeah. Chance was a bfa. Musical theater. I went to all those little shows.

[Josh Sharp]

What's your dream role, Chance? You have it then? Well, I played it in college.

[Caleb Heron]

Bottom.

[Josh Sharp]

Sure, yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

He was great in it. Bottom of Midsummer, I went.

[Josh Sharp]

I mean, it was the Dentist. Whatever.

[Caleb Heron]

You're funny. Not gay enough, though. Yeah, you're not very good at gay. You're just. Come on, give it one try, Chance.

[Josh Sharp]

Come on.

[Caleb Heron]

But I don't know.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you want to do that gay voice we were doing earlier? Just one time?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't want to say like you do in private here on the pod. Get him canceled.

[Josh Sharp]

Get him canceled. Oh, God. The pod would fall apart.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, the pod would fall apart. Without chance.

[Josh Sharp]

Think of the pod without chance. I don't even want to.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't want. What makes me sick.

[Josh Sharp]

It makes me. Makes me sick. Makes me upset.

[Caleb Heron]

Think of your dentist without your jokes.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, honey, I don't want to.

[Caleb Heron]

Structural beam.

[Josh Sharp]

I'd be caked in plaque in that instance. I wouldn't go.

[Caleb Heron]

Goodness, I hate it.

[Josh Sharp]

I hate it.

[Caleb Heron]

What's up, y'all? Today's episode is sponsored by, you guessed it, Twisted Freaking Tea. Twisted Tea is a refreshing, hard iced tea. It's perfect for all kinds of events, okay? During the cold winter months, you got it. During the warm summer months, you got it. And spring, in certain regions, who knows what the weather might be where you live. But anytime, a cold, delicious beverage after a nice walk or a flag football game. Yeah, sometimes that's literally the only thing on Earth you need to take your day from. Let's just say good to great. Now, there's just a few things you guys need to know. I'm clearing the record. I'm getting it all out there about my friends at Twisted Tea and what makes them so darn special to me. First of all, tastes like realized tea because it's made with real brewed tea, okay? But it's not just real brewed tea. If that was all it was, we would just call it tea, okay? It's Twisted. It's got a nice kick of 5% ABV. Same great taste as a typical iced tea, but with a fun little bonus to help get the party started a little bit, okay? It goes down smooth, I'll tell you that much. There's no carbonation, which makes it easy to drink all day long. You could literally drink this stuff every second of every day. Twisted Tea is the perfect alcohol slash beverage to keep the good times going all year long. All day, all month, all year. Whether you're hanging out at a friend's house, okay, you're at the stadium, the bar, who knows where you might be drinking? Maybe you're at one of my famous watch parties for the Kansas City Chiefs football organization. Or you just see where the day takes you. Maybe you wake up. You need a Twisted Tea before you can start your day. Twisted Tea is there to turn your day up. A Notch and make a good time into, well, let's just say a great time. So grab a refreshing twisted tea today. And do me a favor, keep it twisted. All right, everybody, you know the drill. Today's episode is brought to you by none other than Alma. Alma believes that therapy is more impactful when you feel heard and understood. So they help you find a therapist who really gets you the right someone to talk to. Not just anyone. Look, you guys know I'm not currently in therapy. It's been discussed on the show. But I do know the importance of having someone in life who just kind of understands where you're coming from. Someone to listen to you during tough times if you're not as strong as me. Maybe you've been considering finding a licensed professional to help you work through your life's challenges. Okay. And that's important. Life has challenges. Give Alma a try. When you browse the directory, you can filter by what you want to focus on. From anxiety to relationships and other big things. Your big life transitions, your gender, your sexuality. And if I know anything about my fans, y'all are transitioning your gender and sexuality. Over 95% of therapists at Alma accept insurance and people who find in network care through Alma. Hey, on average, you're saving 77% on the cost of therapy. Then you can just focus on finding someone who feels like the right fit without worrying so much about the money side of things. You can look through the directory. You do not have to create an account or give them payment information until you're ready. You can book a free consultation call with any therapist you're interested in seeing. Okay. It's a 15 minute call. Gives you a chance to see if they're a good fit for you. And you can find someone you really click with. So Alma can help you find the right therapist for you. Not just anyone. The right someone. Visit. Hello Alma.com Sotrue to get started and schedule a free consultation today. That's hello. A L M A C O M S O T R U E. Well, I would love to see you in any show.

[Josh Sharp]

And you.

[Caleb Heron]

And you.

[Josh Sharp]

What should we do together? I guess. Oh, let's do Waiting for Godot. The two of us. I mean, that could be fun. Waiting for God, clowning around.

[Caleb Heron]

Waiting for Gaydo. Waiting for homo.

[Josh Sharp]

Waiting for Gaydo.

[Caleb Heron]

We should do a show together. But you're too busy. You'd never do a show together. Sweetie.

[Josh Sharp]

Pot, kettle. Don't even.

[Caleb Heron]

You'd never do a show with me.

[Josh Sharp]

Don't even. I literally asked you to Do a show before we rolled, you said, sorry to pull back the curtain.

[Caleb Heron]

Actually, it's even worse. What I said was, I'll come. I'm free that night. I might come and watch, but I'm not performing. My answer is even worse than no. It's. I can come. I might actually be there, and I'm not getting on stage. That is so funny.

[Josh Sharp]

Life is long, though. We'll do a show.

[Caleb Heron]

We'll definitely do a show.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm a seer. I have sight. And I've seen that. You know, you.

[Caleb Heron]

I mentioned yesterday we recorded Jay Jerden, and we were talking.

[Josh Sharp]

Wonderful person.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, wonderful person. God.

[Josh Sharp]

Ugly guy, ugly body.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, disgusting creature.

[Josh Sharp]

Nasty, ugly guy.

[Caleb Heron]

Disgusting creature from hell.

[Josh Sharp]

Conventionally ugly body.

[Caleb Heron]

Jay Jordan, you sick, sloppy, messy individual who can't write or tell a joke.

[Josh Sharp]

No, Jay, get out of here. He's gonna be mad.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, I hate him.

[Josh Sharp]

He's one of those who. He's like, how about three jokes when one could do.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, in one breath, there's always, like, four laugh lines. I'm like, leave some for the rest of us.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. He's like, what if this. What if every word of the setup was also a punchline?

[Josh Sharp]

I know. It's not.

[Caleb Heron]

What if you fuck off?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

And let the rest.

[Josh Sharp]

So I have pecs.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, okay.

[Josh Sharp]

Good God.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh. And you're one of the most ripped individuals alive, and you're in a healthy marriage and you're open. Well, open people. No, I'm sorry. I know everyone's doing it, you know, and it's.

[Josh Sharp]

It's good or bad, depending on the situation. Just as monogamy is.

[Caleb Heron]

How's it for you?

[Josh Sharp]

Good.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Wait, what were you about Jay Jordan?

[Caleb Heron]

I was gonna say that on his episode, it was really rainy, and so he had an umbrella, and I was telling him about your. Your umbrella bit that I love from your latest show.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh.

[Caleb Heron]

You know, people in Manhattan should have to have.

[Josh Sharp]

Sometimes I feel like that's hack, but New York crowds like it.

[Caleb Heron]

I love it.

[Josh Sharp]

I feel like there's a version of it that's hack that I'm trying to make. Not hack by, like, sort of adding too many monosyllabic words.

[Caleb Heron]

Right.

[Josh Sharp]

A lot of my comedy is that it's like, what's the dumb version? And how do you say it? With big words.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I like that.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

I love that show. Josh.

[Josh Sharp]

Hey, thanks.

[Caleb Heron]

I love your show. It's so good. I'm very excited for you to do it again. When are you Doing it again.

[Josh Sharp]

I have no plans yet because it seems in a I can't say things officially yet way that it will have a long run next summer.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I think that I can say.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So we're not really doing any more one offs because we're waiting for that to solidify. But I bet come next summer, you're gonna have eight chances a week to say it. Let's just to see it. Let's just say that. You know what I mean? That's where it feels like it's going.

[Caleb Heron]

Spoiled with riches. We would.

[Josh Sharp]

And if that doesn't end up happening, that sucks for me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Just know if you hear this in months from now, that doesn't come true.

[Caleb Heron]

No.

[Josh Sharp]

Something went wrong.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And that sucks for me.

[Caleb Heron]

My life crumbled in that area.

[Josh Sharp]

But the thing that I was told was, happened. Fell apart.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And that sucks for me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Don't come for me. What happened to that show that you said was gonna have a run? Yeah. Well, I guess it didn't. And not by my choosing.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. I didn't decide not to do it.

[Josh Sharp]

No. No.

[Caleb Heron]

This is one of my favorite energies online, by the way, is when people. People in our world try to. Try to, like, they think the general public is so stupid that they try to play off a clear loss as like a choice. It's someone like. It's someone like, tickets aren't. Tickets aren't selling to their show, you know, and they'll get on Instagram stories and be like, hey, you guys, last few tickets available, like, go get them right now while you can. And it's like, it's been on sale for months. We know you can tell that it's not the last few tickets.

[Josh Sharp]

We know.

[Caleb Heron]

I genuinely. I'm not being mean because we've all done it. I love that energy. I think it's so awesome. I think it's hilarious.

[Josh Sharp]

You like that, that smokescreen.

[Caleb Heron]

I think it's funny. I'm like, this is funny that we all do this.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Because, by the way, partially when you. You're doing it not even for the general public, you're doing it for your peers.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

To be like, my show selling really well. Don't you know?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

That's funny.

[Josh Sharp]

You have to sort of. I guess that's true of this business. It is. It is funny. But it's also a shame that you have to sort of like, at all times be projecting that things are going pretty well.

[Caleb Heron]

Of course, it's a. It's an. It's an actual spaces to go.

[Josh Sharp]

Actually, my career is only. Okay.

[Caleb Heron]

It's this podcast. That's where you can do that. And I'll tell you my other favorite thing that I love is when someone gets an objectively hurtful review of their project, and then they go, you know what? This bothers me so little. I'm posting it.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, well, we did that. But it was so funny to us. If it's funny, me and Aaron got some, like, really hysterical, like, bad reviews of our film, which we knew would happen.

[Caleb Heron]

Dick's the musical. Stream now.

[Josh Sharp]

Stream now on Max. But it was so funny. Cause in the lead up, everybody's like, oh, my God, I bet you're so excited for, like, Fox News to find this. And we were like, first of all, no, I'm not excited for.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm scared.

[Josh Sharp]

And we were like. And second of all, I don't know that that's gonna happen. I think we've made a rather niche film that's gonna. And. And I think people in our bubble are gonna dislike it. And people like, no, conservatives are gonna rip it. Of course, it was like, well, a ton of liberals hated it.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And those. Those were the funniest hate reviews to us. Of course, there is one we posted where this person just kept as a refrain because she was ripping it. And she kept, like, every fourth line going. And again, all caps. I am a lesbian. She keeps coming back to this. See?

[Caleb Heron]

But to me, there's a subtle difference.

[Josh Sharp]

Between so funny to us.

[Caleb Heron]

There's a subtle difference between one that's actually funny and one that's pure vitriol. Like, sometimes people like, I'll share one. That's like, someone for Sweethearts. I. The. The. During the festival period.

[Josh Sharp]

Max.

[Caleb Heron]

Stream on Max during the festival.

[Josh Sharp]

Great double feature, actually, by the way.

[Caleb Heron]

Stream on Max. Dicks the musical and then stream on Max. Sweethearts.

[Josh Sharp]

What order do you think? Is there a first than a second?

[Caleb Heron]

I would go. I would go Sweethearts first just in case they don't make it to a second one.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm Dicks when you go to sleep, because I could use the fraction of a penny. You know what I mean? I don't care. I don't care if you keep your eyes open, but at least press Play Do Dicks.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't think I get points on Sweethearts. Do Dicks first and then get to me if you have a chance. But I read the reviews only during the festival period on letterboxd. I read a couple of them and then didn't again. And someone during that period said, Something that. Which I posted something to the effect of please put Caleb Heron in more movies immediately. He doesn't have much time left. He's like 40. And that to me was so actually funny.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

That I was like, I have to post it. It's hilarious.

[Josh Sharp]

But it was funny on multiple levels. Because one, you're not almost 40.

[Caleb Heron]

No, I'm not.

[Josh Sharp]

If you. You'd have plenty of time left.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, it's funny on so many levels. And also it's like letterboxd.

[Josh Sharp]

Like sweethearts letterboxd. Didn't really like dicks, but again, that's a thing. Where we, like, knew it wasn't for them. I've heard they didn't hate it, but it's just film, people.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm not reading it.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, A24's accounts did not like our film. Because I was like, well, yeah, yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm not reading it. But I've heard that. I've heard that it's like, it's not like a 4.5 on there. Like, it's not.

[Josh Sharp]

I should say also, I. I sort of don't read it. Like, I actually don't. But it's impossible for things not to get to you.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, they come.

[Josh Sharp]

But people, even when you're like, I'm not looking at it. It finds a way.

[Caleb Heron]

It comes.

[Josh Sharp]

You have to sort of make the choice to not look at it so that you can then look at it less.

[Caleb Heron]

Right.

[Josh Sharp]

Because there's no rebuking the Lord, you know, like, it's gonna get into you.

[Caleb Heron]

It's coming to you.

[Josh Sharp]

People give it to you and you don't want it. And it just like bleeds. It permeates. Yeah. So we were like, I would see some. Even though I was choosing to not see any.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And the choice to not see any meant I just saw a little.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, you just saw a little bit.

[Josh Sharp]

But some of them were funny.

[Caleb Heron]

What? A little bit through. No, some of them are funny. And I'm being genuine, by the way. I think it's hilarious when people do that. I do legitimately love the energy of posting, like straight up vitriol and being like, actually, this didn't bother me at all. It's like, clearly it did. But that's funny. I like that. I really like that. I'd like to make shirts of some of my hate comments.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you have any? Which one would you put on a shirt right now? Because we would do the full, like, you know, Willie Norris. Willie Norris is fabulous fashion designer and she's sort of known for Willie Norris work. She works for some big fashion house that like straight guys like that I literally can't remember the name of. I'm probably getting all of this wrong, but what I know her for is Willie Norris workshop where she does a lot of like screen printed T shirts. She used to have these socks that were like Nike socks that said love me tender on one side and fuck me hard on the other. Stuff like that. Yeah, she's the one that say promote homosexuality. Those T shirts, you've seen those. But she has this one where she's just screen printed this like awful review of. Of I think like a Denny's or something. But when this I'm a lesbian review came out, she was like, I'm gonna make a T shirt of that. I'm realizing out loud I need to make her follow through on it. But anyway, this is. That was so. Cut that. Good God. All preamble to say, what is the one you would put on a shirt first?

[Caleb Heron]

I don't remember it word for word, but there was a DM we got on the podcast account a couple months ago that was from like a very concerned Christian right wing person that was like you enabling, like devil worshiping. Like you're going to hell.

[Josh Sharp]

Clocked. Clocked and owned. First of all.

[Caleb Heron]

Enabling devil worshiping. I'm like, just that alone.

[Josh Sharp]

I feel incredibly enabled. Let me just say that.

[Caleb Heron]

And. And the devil would feel incredibly worshiped were she here.

[Josh Sharp]

Come on.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Leave a chair for Prophet Elijah. No, for the devil.

[Caleb Heron]

For the devil who we worship and we frankly need in here. I would put that on a shirt. I think that's really funny.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, now here's the thing though, because I hear you, that part where people like share the vitriol and they're like, this didn't affect me. And you're like, well, clearly it did. But there also is a doubling back where sometimes like I'm not convinced the self exists. And so sometimes there's a thing where you have to sort of like subjugate yourself to that to be like, I'm not real. All these people are thinking this thing about me, but it's not about me. I don't even know if I'm real. And whatever you're saying is not about me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So it's like, it doesn't affect me, but it does affect me because it helps inform my worldview of like, I have to decentralize myself. Like I have to be like. Like, say whatever you want. It doesn't. It can't matter. First of all, it's about you, not me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Second of all, even if it were the self you're talking about perhaps doesn't exist.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, there's a person I need you to meet. I went to a dinner for a Jewish holiday, and I forget which one.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, shoot.

[Caleb Heron]

I went to a dinner.

[Josh Sharp]

Put it in. In post.

[Caleb Heron]

I went to a dinner for Rosh Hashanah. It's like an 80 arden at my friend's mom's house in Brooklyn. And there was a wonderful gay professor there who was love already obsessed with the idea that the self doesn't exist. And he and I got. We were sitting next to each other while everyone else was over in the living room kind of chatting. And I just. At the table, and he's going into me about. He's like. He's like, the self doesn't exist. And getting over yourself is actually the biggest thing you can do for happiness. Like, getting over yourself in the literal. Getting over the sense that you even exist.

[Josh Sharp]

I think that's true.

[Caleb Heron]

And I was like, that's beautiful. And he was.

[Josh Sharp]

I try to be on that journey. I got. You're right. I gotta talk to this guy. Yeah. Did he have any theories on what that forms consciousness?

[Caleb Heron]

I'm sure he did, and we didn't get there.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm sort of into Hofstadter's strange loop theory. People should read. Well, it's one of those things that is like. You read it, you're like, this is so true. And then someone's like, summarize it. You're like, couldn't if I tried. And that's, like, why it feels true. It's because you're like. It's so layered and nuanced and complex. It essentially is sort of saying, I'm gonna give the most dumb gay guy version of it. That, like, we as entities are sort of incredibly small, but also big. Like, you're this mass of individual particles that are all, like, uniquely motivated, and yet somehow they come together to be this thing, you know, and it's. And it, like, where one ends and the other begins, is very porous. It's like we shed all our cells every seven years. It's also like the. The atoms that make me end in the chair begin, like, literally are trading. So it's like. That is already weird. So he's like, basically, your brain is sort of oscillating between beings, individual small things and this mass of big things. And he believes that the quick oscillation of that, as if you're like filming a tv and you know, you see the TV and the TV and the TV and the tv, and it creates this thing that's not real. It's a full illusion, but it feels very real. He's like, that's what consciousness is. It's like you're oscillating between the small and the big at all times. And so it creates this sort of like infinite loop that becomes the self again. Does that make any sense at all? No. And yet it's beautiful. It's poetic.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. I don't want to think about that stuff.

[Josh Sharp]

I understand that.

[Caleb Heron]

Do you know what I mean?

[Josh Sharp]

And me, it's all I want to think about.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. That is a one key difference between us is you're thinking about stuff like that. And my happiness is based in stupidity. I avoid and deny.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, I like that kind of science. That's so. Like, I'll read stuff about like, quantum mechanics and stuff because it's so highfalutin and theoretical and nonsense that it is stupid to me.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like some of the hard sciences where it's like, I measured this thing and it was true. I'm like, boring when it's like, we have no way to explain this. So I've designed the most insane theory of all time. It might as well be Tolkien. It's like full dumb. It feels like fantasy and I love that. It feels stupid to me how smart it is because it's like we've. We've blown past the limits of what we can understand and we're just like sitting in. In fucking, you know, tenured rooms. Offices and just like, doing thought experiments and coming up with this cockamamney nonsense. I love it. Yeah, that's gay guy shit. Really?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. That's gay guy nonsense.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, yeah. Theoretical math.

[Caleb Heron]

Gay guy, gay guy shit.

[Josh Sharp]

When gay guys talk and chance is like, what did one word of that mean? When we're like, down the house Boots, honey, mama. It's like that's what these. These quantum physicists sound like. You know what I mean? It's like it's all the same. It's just been mad libbed differently.

[Caleb Heron]

It's two silly telling each other. Exactly.

[Josh Sharp]

And it means something to them. Yeah, it means something to them.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And so I love that. Yeah, I love that.

[Caleb Heron]

That's gorgeous.

[Josh Sharp]

Thank you.

[Caleb Heron]

We should come up with our own theory of the universe.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

A fan message.

[Josh Sharp]

How much time we got left on the pod?

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, we could do it today.

[Josh Sharp]

We'll find it.

[Caleb Heron]

A fan messaged me yesterday and said, you should rewrite the Bible.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, that's a good idea.

[Caleb Heron]

Thinking about doing it.

[Josh Sharp]

Can I ask. And it's fine if you don't have it yet because sometimes you figure things out in the writing. What's your take?

[Caleb Heron]

My take on the Bible, a lot of it's going to be the same. I think they. They nailed some pretty key concepts. Murdering everyone because you're mad at them type. Flooding the earth because people weren't being obedient. That's sick. He him behavior island. Creating a he him island via the floods. Literally.

[Josh Sharp]

Literally.

[Caleb Heron]

I think my version of the Bible.

[Josh Sharp]

I would just go like, there's definitely some cuts.

[Caleb Heron]

You know what? Here's the big thing about the Bible and Christianity. I would just cut the idea that like the mandatory part, like you have to believe in my version to go to heaven. I'm like, that can't be. That's what lost me from Christianity. I go, you're telling me there's no Jewish people or Muslim people in heaven.

[Josh Sharp]

Here you can't shut up about grace.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And yet, and yet. You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

A really nice Muslim guy can't go to heaven.

[Josh Sharp]

Exactly.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't buy it.

[Josh Sharp]

A hot Muslim guy doesn't get into heaven.

[Caleb Heron]

And I've seen some hot Muslim guys and I've seen some hot guys of all faiths and they belong in heaven.

[Josh Sharp]

And they're not getting to heaven. Come on.

[Caleb Heron]

You ever seen a hot person who's bad at kissing? Yeah, I've been big. I've been big on this lately.

[Josh Sharp]

It's a bummer.

[Caleb Heron]

I kissed a hot. One of. One of the hottest guys I've kissed and he was such a bad kisser, I thought, how did you get here, brother?

[Josh Sharp]

Have you ever.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, how did I get good at this and you didn't?

[Josh Sharp]

I feel like we've talked about this. I feel like I. You don't go to go to da club as much as maybe I do. But there's moments where you're at the club and maybe someone wants to make out and you make out. And in that moment, I go, you're on a different drug journey than I am.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, tell me about that. I wouldn't know.

[Josh Sharp]

Just mean. Just me. Well, actually, I find I don't use much drugs in the club. Really. Because I like to a light, light touch. You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And I'm there for the music. Ultimately, I'm in communion with the dj. We're on our own frequency. Yeah, but sometimes you kiss someone, you go, you've been doing something. I know that much. This isn't the kiss of a person who's on planet Earth.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And I have to go, well, good luck and God bless.

[Caleb Heron]

What are the characteristics of that kiss? Usually, like I'm trying to.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, you can sort of tell the drug.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what I mean? Sometimes the kiss is outside of time in a way that you go. That's.

[Caleb Heron]

You know what I mean?

[Josh Sharp]

Like, you are not. You are not on the same sort of natural rhythms of what a kiss should be.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Parts are too slow, parts are too fast.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You are not on time in the way that I am experiencing time.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. You know, you're not moving the lips in the right.

[Josh Sharp]

Sometimes it's. And you're like. That's, you know, like you want in to something.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're trying to penetrate with the lip.

[Josh Sharp]

You're trying to get in there.

[Caleb Heron]

Crazy.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Hot person is bad at. Kissing is just such a confounding phenomenon to me.

[Josh Sharp]

It's not right. Do you think? Is that a feedback loop? I'm hot, so I never learned to kiss.

[Caleb Heron]

That's what people are theorizing.

[Josh Sharp]

Like some of us who are less hot. You got to get scrappy out in these streets.

[Caleb Heron]

I don't know. I just.

[Josh Sharp]

You got to earn your keep.

[Caleb Heron]

Kissing to me is like, God, pay some attention, focus up, have some care.

[Josh Sharp]

Kissing's the number one.

[Caleb Heron]

Kissing's the number one thing. If you're a bad kisser, I don't care what else you're good at.

[Josh Sharp]

Non negotiable.

[Caleb Heron]

You could be a saint. And if you're a bad kisser, I want you dead. I don't want you to ever come around me again. Kissing is everything. It's number one.

[Josh Sharp]

Kissing rules.

[Caleb Heron]

If we spend four hours kissing and three minutes having sex, I'm happy as a clam, honey.

[Josh Sharp]

Zero minutes having sex.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Fuck sex.

[Josh Sharp]

Literally.

[Caleb Heron]

Fuck sex. Marry kissing.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, yeah. Marry, kissing, sex. What? I guess we need a third kill.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, wait, hold on. I want to think of what I really want to kill. I really. I kind of want to kill. Frantically looking for a kamtow. Because you didn't. You didn't were thinking of it.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Do you know when, you know when you weren't planning.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Like someone's maybe over and you're. Or you're somewhere that you didn't have the kamtow. And then now, especially if you come at the same time or around the same time. And now it's just like. So someone's gonna have to like this.

[Josh Sharp]

Just happened to you. It's so vivid, this description. This happened to you. This. You're describing something from the last 72 hours.

[Caleb Heron]

70 from the last three hours.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Okay.

[Caleb Heron]

No, I'm kidding. But, yeah. Desperately looking for a combo.

[Josh Sharp]

It's 11 in the morning. Let the viewer know. By the way, when you're playing back.

[Caleb Heron]

The last three hours, tiptoeing and trying not to spill.

[Josh Sharp]

Come.

[Caleb Heron]

And being like, where's the towel? Oh, God, it's so.

[Josh Sharp]

Although there's something funny about that. I mean, is that not the Marx Brothers right there?

[Caleb Heron]

Of course.

[Josh Sharp]

Tiptoeing, trying not to spill. Is that not Buster Keaton?

[Caleb Heron]

Tell me that's not. That's not Carol Burnett show. Original season, seasons.

[Josh Sharp]

Clown is back.

[Caleb Heron]

Clown is back.

[Josh Sharp]

We all know this.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm trying not to drip. Come while I look for the cum towel. Sweetie.

[Josh Sharp]

If that's not a Zack Zuckerbi, I don't know what is. You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Goodness, you put Zack Sucker in there. Even Zack Sucker's getting put in the. In the. The mix of references he deserves.

[Josh Sharp]

It's a good guy. Sweethearts.

[Caleb Heron]

Sweethearts and Zack Suckers.

[Josh Sharp]

Zack Sucker's a good guy.

[Caleb Heron]

Zack Sucker. Dancing a lot.

[Josh Sharp]

Dance. I know. I. I have you. I want to go to a class with him.

[Caleb Heron]

Okay, you gotta get him.

[Josh Sharp]

I sometimes go to classes, too, and I don't even want to say where, because I like that. It's my little secret. But then, you know, the line dancing became more the thing. But lately I've been like, I want to go back to the classes.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

There's one class I go to that's like a house music class, and it's so fun. Well, when I just like that type of music and I like to dance to it, and the style of dance is, like, so fun, and it's a bunch of footwork. Also, I'm the worst one in the room. And I think it's so good for your character to be bad at something and keep going back. I'm always the worst one in the room, and I love that feeling. But he's very good about this guy. Where at the end, when you're doing the thing that I guess is the norm in dance classes now, where they're like, we're gonna run the choreo. You learn. And everybody sets up their damn phones to film themselves. God bless rock and roll. They do it one time, and then he's like, okay, we did that. Now we're getting in a circle and we're doing it at one another. Because this is ultimately house music is. It's like a social dance. Like, you're doing this to be in your body and be in communion with other people. So it doesn't matter if you get it right. Like, do it to have joy with other people. And I'm like, I. I transcend. I'm like, I'm in heaven. This is church.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

This is what we should be doing it for.

[Caleb Heron]

You should start a religion.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

I like your ideas.

[Josh Sharp]

We should. Would you be an acolyte?

[Caleb Heron]

You got a good. An acolyte of your faith. Absolutely.

[Josh Sharp]

Thank you. We'll be going. Knocking at the doors. Hi, I'm Zay Zoo.

[Caleb Heron]

Absolutely. Hi, I'm Non Binary, and I want to talk to you about Josh Sharp.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you do dance classes?

[Caleb Heron]

No. Have you ever a dance class? No. I've been to, like, a stud country.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Which is a class, but also sort of a party.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. No, I've not done a class.

[Josh Sharp]

Sort of the hybrid space.

[Caleb Heron]

I'd be open to it, I guess. It's just never. I've never done it. Time.

[Josh Sharp]

Let's go.

[Caleb Heron]

Let's go to one.

[Josh Sharp]

I'll take you to this one if you want.

[Caleb Heron]

I'll do anything with you.

[Josh Sharp]

It's sort of hard, but I like that. It's not supposed to be. It's supposed to be, like, open, level, beginner. But then I get there and I'm.

[Caleb Heron]

Like, well, this is hard.

[Josh Sharp]

This is sort of hard.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, that would be me for sure. I like to think I have rhythm. Maybe I would be a duo. I like.

[Josh Sharp]

I feel like you have rhythm.

[Caleb Heron]

I'd like to think I actually have.

[Josh Sharp]

Great rhythm, but do find I'm just such, like, an oath. Like. Like, I look stupid dancing in a way that I. No, I say that with love. I, like, appreciate it. I watch myself and I'm like, you have such, like, sort of, like, goofy dad energy. Like, other people look cooler dancing. And I'm like. But I sort of love looking like a dweeb.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, still doing it.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Oh, that's beautiful.

[Josh Sharp]

I think it's fun, but I'm good at picking up stuff. I don't think I look good doing it. I think I'd need a lot of training to, like, get that out of me and be an actual, like, dancer.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Which maybe that's my journey.

[Caleb Heron]

But I have a question for you.

[Josh Sharp]

Anything.

[Caleb Heron]

What's so true to you?

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, God. I had something earlier and then I lost it. I feel like I should either remember it or just come up with something on this.

[Caleb Heron]

Don't worry. We can cut anything. We can cut this whole moment here. You can really think on it if you want.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, you know what came up to me earlier? So true to me. You tell me if this is a good example for the prompt.

[Caleb Heron]

Okay.

[Josh Sharp]

It should be the law that every martini comes with a sidecar. Do you know what I'm saying, Hal?

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, goodness.

[Josh Sharp]

I assume the listener knows what a sidecar is, where it's like, they only pour in, like, a sip of a martini in the martini glass, and the rest is in a little goblet on ice beside it. You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

That should be the law.

[Caleb Heron]

Here's a law. I'll add to that. I love that. So true. And I'll go a step further and say, I don't really care about martinis, but if I was gonna get one, I'd want 17 olives.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm down for that.

[Caleb Heron]

Bring me 17 olives.

[Josh Sharp]

Here's the thing about a martini. It really goes to prove that the way we feel about drinking is contextual. If you were drinking straight gin, lukewarm, out of a Mountain Dew bottle, I'd be like, you have a problem.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Make the gin very cold in a classy glass. And we're like, nothing is more refined.

[Caleb Heron]

Nothing to think of.

[Josh Sharp]

It's the same exact drink. Martini is just like booze, but cold.

[Caleb Heron]

Y.

[Josh Sharp]

But we've decided it is, like, the pinnacle of class when it's drunkard behavior. So if the whole thing is, like, I'm only permitting this because it's so fucking cold, then I'm like, sit it on ice, baby. I want every sip to be as cold as it could be. That's why we're here. The only thing you're offering me is a certain glass check and that it's cold, so put it on ice, mama baby, or else. I'm an alcoholic.

[Caleb Heron]

Put it on ice or else I.

[Josh Sharp]

Have a problem, and I don't want to do that.

[Caleb Heron]

When you were in college, did you ever do eggs and kegs?

[Josh Sharp]

What's that?

[Caleb Heron]

Kegs and eggs.

[Josh Sharp]

Kegs and eggs.

[Caleb Heron]

This is when I knew a lot of my friends have drinking problems.

[Josh Sharp]

I remember kegs.

[Caleb Heron]

Kegs. Kegs and eggs is when you would do a breakfast keg, and then you would do, like, eggs, and then you would go to.

[Josh Sharp]

We didn't do that.

[Caleb Heron]

They would drink. They would drink at 6, 7 in the morning to go to a football game. And I'm like, legitimately, y'all are ill. Yeah, I'm Like, I can't. This is not. This is insane to me.

[Josh Sharp]

Where'd you go to school again?

[Caleb Heron]

Missouri State. Bears. Shout out bears. Go Bears. Love Missouri State.

[Josh Sharp]

And shout out Tar Heels. UNC Chapel Hill. Let's go.

[Caleb Heron]

Shout out schools. Shout out Tar Heels.

[Josh Sharp]

UNC Chapel Hills. Public funded sports. Let's go for it.

[Caleb Heron]

Shout out Missouri State. Shout out unc. Sister schools.

[Josh Sharp]

Sister schools. Sister schools. We just founded by sisters, actually.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes. Two sisters.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, two sisters.

[Caleb Heron]

That's this episode.

[Josh Sharp]

Lesbian. Two lesbian sisters.

[Caleb Heron]

Two lesbian sisters. Is this episode of Social.

[Josh Sharp]

They didn't date each other. Weirdo.

[Caleb Heron]

That'd be freaky. Stop.

[Josh Sharp]

That's not what they did.

[Caleb Heron]

You think they stole glances and eventually kissed? Stop. No, that's weird.

[Josh Sharp]

That's gross.

[Caleb Heron]

Are you in bitcoin at all?

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

Are you? Well, no, but I have something.

[Josh Sharp]

You're giving me bitcoin?

[Caleb Heron]

No.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, my God. Caleb's Giving me Bitcoin.

[Caleb Heron]

November 19th to a coin. November 19th, 2013, you posted on Facebook. I can't answer the question, what is a bitcoin? But I do know I bought 25 bucks worth of it in June and Now it's worth $200. So that's something.

[Josh Sharp]

That's because of my friend Cece.

[Caleb Heron]

Now, what happened?

[Josh Sharp]

I have one friend who I ended up selling it soon after. I think it would be so much money because at the time I was like, I don't block. I don't buy this.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

But I have a friend who's really into bitcoin, and twice he's had me buy stuff. That one turned into like $200 soon after I sold it. And then a little while ago, he had to sell one that, like, tanked.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Or buy one that tanked. But that's like, what he does.

[Caleb Heron]

And you were in it for a second.

[Josh Sharp]

But not I bought it. That. Probably posted that because I remember forgot about it for years and at one point was reminded I had it and had to, like, figure out how to get in. My wallet was like, I'm gonna sell this. Because, like, I'm never checking on this.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

So I did. I have twice in my life bought a cryptocurrency chance loves to look through, thanks to my friend.

[Caleb Heron]

Post Cece. Shout out. Cece.

[Josh Sharp]

Shout out. Cece.

[Caleb Heron]

On March 15, you posted so wild.

[Josh Sharp]

Because I forgot I had a face, you know? I mean, like, I'm so out of that space.

[Caleb Heron]

Anyone?

[Josh Sharp]

I didn't know it was still live.

[Caleb Heron]

March 15, 2010, Josh Sharp. Anyone want to get Pearl Jam tickets?

[Josh Sharp]

Damn. And I And no one did. I've never seen Pearl Jam. No one did. What year was that?

[Caleb Heron]

2010.

[Josh Sharp]

To this day, I've been like, damn, I wish I saw Pearl Jam. Every time they go on tour, I'm like, who would want to see Pearl Jam with me? And the answer is always nobody.

[Caleb Heron]

I would go to Pearl Jam.

[Josh Sharp]

You?

[Caleb Heron]

My good goodness.

[Josh Sharp]

Put it right there. I love Pearl Jam.

[Caleb Heron]

Let's go to Pearl Jam. I would go to Pearl Jam with you.

[Josh Sharp]

This is why I posted this in 2010.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. You needed this community.

[Josh Sharp]

Years later, you would bring it up on a Headgun podcast. A phrase I never would have known in 2010.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes.

[Josh Sharp]

And then we could go see Pearl Jam.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes.

[Josh Sharp]

I think Pearl Jam rules me.

[Caleb Heron]

And do you know Jack Martin?

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

Friend of mine. Been on the show. Great guest. We're going to see creepy Creed. And who else is on that lineup?

[Josh Sharp]

Creed was huge.

[Caleb Heron]

We're going to see Creed, and I think it's Daughtry, and it's. It's in. I can't wait.

[Josh Sharp]

Creed was huge for me. A person whose first concert was Newsboys. You know what I mean? Because that was secular music, you know? You know, you'd go to youth group.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And you would do the, like, let's find the Christian themes in a Dave Matthews Band song.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, we were doing that down.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Creed.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, garbage in, garbage out.

[Josh Sharp]

Easiest assignment you had because Creed was put making the subtext text. He was literally like, yeah, this is secular music, but it's about Jesus, baby.

[Caleb Heron]

Jesus.

[Josh Sharp]

Wow. You're seeing Creed.

[Caleb Heron]

Come on, now. I love Creed. Oh, my God. Creed. Set summer of 99, 2025, American tour 3 Doors down and Daughtry.

[Josh Sharp]

Vivid memory of Creed 3 Doors down at the county fair. On that one where you're the spinning one where you were up it and it would, like, go sideways. And because of the centrical force, you could, like, you know, slide. You know what I'm talking about?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

That one where you sort of felt like you were outside of gravity. Vivid memory of them playing three doors down and me doing that. That's great.

[Caleb Heron]

Fucking awesome.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

I can't wait to go to this concert. I will be there. I don't know what. I don't know what night. Creed. Creed. Three doors down in Daughtry. If any of you were listening, I'd love to be on the list. I'd love to come backstage.

[Josh Sharp]

Pearl Jam as well. You could get two noted comedians on the list.

[Caleb Heron]

You can get two gay comedians.

[Josh Sharp]

I'll even throw in a Post.

[Caleb Heron]

I'll throw in a post.

[Josh Sharp]

I'll throw in a social media story and grid. Story and grid.

[Caleb Heron]

And I'm guessing for all four of these band hands, getting two noted gay guys is probably a bit of a struggle.

[Josh Sharp]

So it's fun to go to a concert like that and open your grinder and like, sand comes out where you were like, I'm the only gay guy within an 8 mile radius.

[Caleb Heron]

As opposed to like, when I went to Sweat and it was like, oh, every profile was one foot away. Yeah, like, the Sweat tour was grinders. I can't imagine how many people got laid at at Sweat tour.

[Josh Sharp]

In the bathroom.

[Caleb Heron]

In the bathroom.

[Josh Sharp]

Wow. I can't believe no one went to Pearl Jam with me in 2010.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm going.

[Josh Sharp]

I just moved to New York.

[Caleb Heron]

You had just moved to New York from North Carolina. Oh, my God.

[Josh Sharp]

What month of 2010 did it say?

[Caleb Heron]

That would have go ahead and mid March.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Okay. I was about six months in.

[Caleb Heron]

That's crazy.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, we got to see Pearl Jam. I love this. Were there any more good Facebook finds or. That was it.

[Caleb Heron]

Those are the only ones I had.

[Josh Sharp]

Chance. Really good, really good stuff.

[Caleb Heron]

Chance. I have a segment for you.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you find. Do you probably find some really damning stuff on people? People and that you don't bring to the pod, I assume because you have conscious only fun. Yeah. But there's probably some gnarly stuff.

[Caleb Heron]

There's some pretty bad comments. Go back. I. I invite everybody.

[Josh Sharp]

You. That's the thing you can say, just like, show me my comments. Like there's a filter or you have to, like, how do you find them? Oh, my God.

[Caleb Heron]

Crazy.

[Josh Sharp]

Crazy.

[Caleb Heron]

I have a segment for you.

[Josh Sharp]

Let's do it.

[Caleb Heron]

It's time for the Twisted True or false segment, brought to you by Twisted T. Now, Josh Twisted T. These folks reached out to me and said, can we sponsor the true false segment? And I said, yeah, yeah, you sure can.

[Josh Sharp]

And they specifically for me, they wanted.

[Caleb Heron]

To do it with you. They said, make it a gay guy.

[Josh Sharp]

Make it a gay guy.

[Caleb Heron]

And because they think you're gonna win. And what's gonna happen here is I'm gonna read you 15 statements. Okay. Then you're gonna tell me if you think they're true or false. All right?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

And then if you get 10, thank.

[Josh Sharp]

You for allowing me just to say that. By the way, I was already gonna be like, say, twisted True or T. False or something.

[Caleb Heron]

You don't need to do any.

[Josh Sharp]

I just was worried.

[Caleb Heron]

You don't need to do any I.

[Josh Sharp]

Was worried I might be like, that's twist. If it's true, say that's twisted. Yeah. And if it's. No. If it's true, go. That's t. That's T. False. Go. Sound twisted.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. You do whatever you want to do.

[Josh Sharp]

For not making me do.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. Well, hey, if you get 10 or more correct, we're going to give you 50 US dollars.

[Josh Sharp]

OK, baby?

[Caleb Heron]

So that's a game you can get behind.

[Josh Sharp]

And I'm going to have to fill out a W9 for Twisted Tea.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes, you are. What's more twisted than that? No, I'm going to do it under the table. We don't believe in taxes around here.

[Josh Sharp]

You heard it. You heard it here first.

[Caleb Heron]

The lifespan of a taste Bud is 10 years.

[Josh Sharp]

I actually think it's less than that. So I'm gonna go. False.

[Caleb Heron]

False. It's 10 days.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

The average.

[Josh Sharp]

Wow. Not only was I right, I was right.

[Caleb Heron]

Big right. The average human blinks.

[Josh Sharp]

I want to unpack each one. There's so much to say. We're gonna have to circle back. I know. It goes quick.

[Caleb Heron]

Gosh. You gotta circle back.

[Josh Sharp]

I know.

[Caleb Heron]

Hold your favorite ones in your head. The average human blinks over 4 million times a year.

[Josh Sharp]

True.

[Caleb Heron]

It's true. Lizards communicate by doing push ups.

[Josh Sharp]

True.

[Caleb Heron]

It's true. Morganton, North Carolina has a population of 17,474 people.

[Josh Sharp]

That sounds true. That's true.

[Caleb Heron]

Diet Coke is older than regular Coke.

[Josh Sharp]

False. It's false.

[Caleb Heron]

The pupil in a goat's eyes are rectangular.

[Josh Sharp]

False.

[Caleb Heron]

That's true.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, I was on a streak.

[Caleb Heron]

You were on a big streak. There are more people than chickens in the world.

[Josh Sharp]

False.

[Caleb Heron]

It's false. North Carolina's state motto is to be rather than to seem.

[Josh Sharp]

True.

[Caleb Heron]

It's true. Patrick Mahomes attended Duke University.

[Josh Sharp]

True.

[Caleb Heron]

False. Texas Tech.

[Josh Sharp]

Who is that?

[Caleb Heron]

Patrick Mahomes?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. He's a sports guy.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, yeah. That hurt. He's the quarterback for the Kansas City Chiefs.

[Josh Sharp]

Understood.

[Caleb Heron]

Very important in my life.

[Josh Sharp]

Understood. Very important in my life. Thank you for the call in, brother.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm calling you in, brother. I'm calling you in.

[Josh Sharp]

And we will talk off mic about this guy Patrick. I love having him in my life and I love knowing he did not go to Duke.

[Caleb Heron]

He did not go to Duke. He went to Texas Tech. Eddie Vedder is the lead vocalist for Van Halen.

[Josh Sharp]

True. We know this.

[Caleb Heron]

False. It's Pearl Jam. Wait.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, you said veteran. Oh, I literally didn't let you get to the end.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, that's a Got your ass.

[Josh Sharp]

There it goes.

[Caleb Heron]

Got your ass.

[Josh Sharp]

There goes my sponsorship. Damn. Listen, Josh. Listen. Listen. Listen, Josh.

[Caleb Heron]

One fourth of the bones in your body are in your feet. Feet. True.

[Josh Sharp]

That feels true.

[Caleb Heron]

That's true. Wicked opened on Broadway in 2003.

[Josh Sharp]

True.

[Caleb Heron]

True. A pelican can hold more food in its beak than its belly.

[Josh Sharp]

True. True.

[Caleb Heron]

Fire was discovered in 1745.

[Josh Sharp]

False. False.

[Caleb Heron]

It was 2 million years ago.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Elaine Stritch was a medic in the u. S. Navy.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, my God. I hope that's true. I bet it's false, but I hope it's true. True. False. Yeah. I mean, wouldn't that be incredible?

[Caleb Heron]

Amazing.

[Josh Sharp]

Wouldn't that be incredible?

[Caleb Heron]

How'd Josh do 11? You did it.

[Josh Sharp]

I get 50 bucks.

[Caleb Heron]

You get 50 bucks.

[Josh Sharp]

Okay, Elaine Stritch.

[Caleb Heron]

Hey, and guess what.

[Josh Sharp]

What?

[Caleb Heron]

Grab a refreshing twisted tea today. And, Josh, keep it twisted. Oh, brother. That's on T. That's on T. That's twisted. Isn't that twisted? What's your favorite song in the whole world? World.

[Josh Sharp]

In the whole world.

[Caleb Heron]

Number one ever. And don't you dare lie to me.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't know what number one is. Do you know what there. You know what I think more than having a number one? There's, like, a class of. There's like an echelon.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

And there are songs that, to me, feel like.

[Caleb Heron]

Do you know what I think more than an echelon?

[Josh Sharp]

What?

[Caleb Heron]

A number one. What is your number one? Songwriter.

[Josh Sharp]

More than one. What there is, is there's a level of songwriting where I go, damn, if I wrote that song, that one song, every day, I would wake up and go, go, life well lived.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't need to do anything else. I did the life yesterday. Tears for fears, Everybody wants to rule the world came on. I said, that's one of those songs. If I wrote that 40 years ago, I would go, we're good. We're tired.

[Caleb Heron]

We did it.

[Josh Sharp]

But of course, my number one favorite song is the Star Spangled Banner. Because I love my country.

[Caleb Heron]

Thank you. You've always been a countryman.

[Josh Sharp]

I've been a countryman and a country boy.

[Caleb Heron]

A country boy.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you have a number one favorite so song? I really don't. That's, like, so impossible.

[Caleb Heron]

You know what I will say, all things considered? I'll just say Godspeed by Frank Ocean.

[Josh Sharp]

Sure.

[Caleb Heron]

It's a song that came at such an important time in my life when I was massively depressed, and I. I think it's so beautiful. And it has. It has continued to mean so Much to me that I'm like, why not? Why not be my number one favorite song?

[Josh Sharp]

And that's one of those you love. When a song in the modern era, you go, this is in the songbook. This is in the great American song book.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

100 years from now, you know, James Blake's already covering it. Like, because we understand. It is. It is text.

[Caleb Heron]

You look down on where you came out from sometimes.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Beautiful.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Wishing you Godspeed. Come on. I love it. But you know what I really. I've been into lately, though? This artist called Billy Ann has a cover of Simply the Best. Do you know this?

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

Simply.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, I know that song, but I.

[Caleb Heron]

Don'T know this cover. Oh, she murders it.

[Josh Sharp]

She murders it.

[Caleb Heron]

I. I think that Billy Ann uses she. But if they use something else, I'm so sorry to Billy Hand. But I love that cover. I've been listening to it on repeat.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm gonna be listening that.

[Caleb Heron]

And also on repeat, I've been listening to Jealous Guy by Donny Hathaway. Oh, love.

[Josh Sharp]

Yes. You've listened to that live record.

[Caleb Heron]

Uhhuh.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh my God.

[Caleb Heron]

Yes.

[Josh Sharp]

That's one of the best produced live records. Cuz you put headphones on, mama. Listen to Donnie Hathaway live. I think it's called Live. Right there's the one. I forget what club it's from. It's from some club downtown that doesn't exist anymore. That was like, had one of those great names like the Boylan Point or something, you know?

[Caleb Heron]

Right.

[Josh Sharp]

But you are in the room. I've like, never heard a live album that most. You hear the room, you feel like you are in the room.

[Caleb Heron]

It's crazy good. It's timeless. You. I was playing it for someone the other night at my house, and I was like, can you believe?

[Josh Sharp]

That live record, I think is one of the. That could be like, number one live album, you know, that stopped making sense. There's a couple that it's like, again, upper echelon. But that Donny Hathaway rules.

[Caleb Heron]

Number one.

[Josh Sharp]

Girls don't put enough respect on Donny Hathaway.

[Caleb Heron]

You listen to Lauren Hill's MTV Unplugged?

[Josh Sharp]

Absolutely.

[Caleb Heron]

That's probably my number one live recording.

[Josh Sharp]

Lauren, I'm sorry, I know you don't. You don't make music for white people. You put it on record. Yeah, I'm not listening. I'm listening to your creed. I am listening to you.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm listening to your music.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm defying your intentions and I'm listening to it.

[Caleb Heron]

I'M not gonna get the tattoo. I'm not gonna do anything.

[Josh Sharp]

Crazy summer do op. That thing came on. I remember being at the pool.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh my God.

[Caleb Heron]

You were at the pool.

[Josh Sharp]

That was one.

[Caleb Heron]

You were at the pool that summer. I remember that about you.

[Josh Sharp]

And that was one of the. There, there are songs, songs like that I. That I associate with, like, you know, a classic song of the summer. But when I was like, if it came out like that era, middle school they are. I remember being like going off the high dive here and like doo wop that thing, you know, that's beautiful. Like soak up the sun. Oh my God.

[Caleb Heron]

Cheryl Crow, Missouri girl.

[Josh Sharp]

Exactly. Oh yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Did you know that Missouri girl?

[Josh Sharp]

She is. Apparently she's lovely.

[Caleb Heron]

Cheryl Crow.

[Josh Sharp]

I know people who've like worked with her and opened for her and stuff and are like, she really tools and you love that.

[Caleb Heron]

I have met her and she's lovely.

[Josh Sharp]

Because that's a person that could. If someone was like, she's off, I'd be like, ah, sure, I guess I hear that. But like she's. She's wonderful.

[Caleb Heron]

She's a she. Her music, she wouldn't know. She wouldn't remember me from Adam, I'm certain of it. But I love her music and a.

[Josh Sharp]

Lovely person, Adam of and Eve fame would.

[Caleb Heron]

Do you know that phrase, that saying, who doesn't know me from Adam, But I.

[Josh Sharp]

But is that the Adam we're referring to when we do that?

[Caleb Heron]

Of course.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Prototypical he him number one. He him.

[Caleb Heron]

I used to think, well, he's. He's the blueprint.

[Josh Sharp]

He's the blueprint for Adam from the.

[Caleb Heron]

Bible is the blueprint print.

[Josh Sharp]

That's true.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm rewriting that though.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm wishing you Godspeed, Adam.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm gonna rewrite the Christian Bible.

[Josh Sharp]

Are you keeping it that it starts with a he him in your version?

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, he hims will be centered just because that's me.

[Josh Sharp]

But is that the first still. Are we still pulling a.

[Caleb Heron]

Do we originate from a he him? Well, you look at how bad the world is and you think a he him had to originate, don't you?

[Josh Sharp]

Well, here's a question. Because rib made she her. In your Bible, what bone has given us non binary people? Everyone knows exactly what I'm saying.

[Caleb Heron]

Rib makes she her. What bone makes a non binary. From the he him body.

[Josh Sharp]

The big G is just pulled the rib out of Adam. He got this great idea for she hers. He says, I know what I need a rib. Then he goes, wait, there's gotta be something else too.

[Caleb Heron]

What's the most?

[Josh Sharp]

Well, of course, because we all know how things go. I gotta pull another bone out of this. He him to make this non binary person. My best idea yet. My greatest invention of all time.

[Caleb Heron]

Right? Femur.

[Josh Sharp]

Femur.

[Caleb Heron]

Femur.

[Josh Sharp]

Femur.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm going femur.

[Josh Sharp]

Sure.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm going femur for sure.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm going. One of the 25% of our bones that are in the feet.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Just pick one at will.

[Caleb Heron]

Just grab a foot bone and make a non binary.

[Josh Sharp]

Let me tell you this. There's a lot to choose from. We know that much.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

One fourth of your bones are in your. Those little feet.

[Caleb Heron]

Grab a foot bone and.

[Josh Sharp]

Makes sense. They're what keeps us up.

[Caleb Heron]

Make a neurodivergent that comes easy to.

[Josh Sharp]

Keep your ass up.

[Caleb Heron]

Up all the time. Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

It takes bones to do that.

[Caleb Heron]

Bones. Mama. Mama. It takes bones, sugar.

[Josh Sharp]

It takes bones.

[Caleb Heron]

You think you're just standing up without bones?

[Josh Sharp]

That's on T. Think again.

[Caleb Heron]

Sugar.

[Josh Sharp]

If you didn't have those bones, you'd be getting all kinds of twisted.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, don't get twisted. You need your foot bones. Foot bones.

[Josh Sharp]

The foot bones connected to the. More foot bones. There's a lot of.

[Caleb Heron]

Connected to the party.

[Josh Sharp]

That's a country song right there, Paul.

[Caleb Heron]

You know this one. Connected to the stand. I do know that.

[Josh Sharp]

There's gotta be a line to that.

[Caleb Heron]

She won't think it's funny and I'll wind up all alone. The lonely bones connected to the drinking bone.

[Josh Sharp]

Yep. There's gotta be a line dance to that one.

[Caleb Heron]

Great song. Is there not already?

[Josh Sharp]

Not that I've learned. But you know.

[Caleb Heron]

You know almost a hundred.

[Josh Sharp]

I know, but it's. I. It must exist. But it hasn't been taught to me yet.

[Caleb Heron]

We need to go. You know what you and I should do anything. We should do a honky tonk road trip where we just go and hit like every big honky tonk we can find.

[Josh Sharp]

Absolutely.

[Caleb Heron]

One a night. Every night.

[Josh Sharp]

Only one. Don't limit us.

[Caleb Heron]

One a night. Oh, I want to experience.

[Josh Sharp]

Let's do multiple a night. You think my nights have sounded longer than yours?

[Caleb Heron]

Your nights are longer than mine. I can tell.

[Josh Sharp]

I can tell you that no one a night's good. We want to live in the space. And you want to see it. Journey beginning to end.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah. You know, I want to see the people who show up and the people who don't leave.

[Josh Sharp]

Save.

[Caleb Heron]

I want to see the people who.

[Josh Sharp]

That's a lyric.

[Caleb Heron]

I want to see that All I.

[Josh Sharp]

Want to see the people who show up and the people who don't leave.

[Caleb Heron]

That's what I want to see.

[Josh Sharp]

That's beautiful.

[Caleb Heron]

That's just what I like.

[Josh Sharp]

That's just what I like. That's that I do like.

[Caleb Heron]

That's that I do like. Mama.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah. Let's go on a honky talk road trip.

[Caleb Heron]

Wouldn't it be fun? Or a travel show.

[Josh Sharp]

Are you kidding?

[Caleb Heron]

You and I should have a travel show.

[Josh Sharp]

Pearl Jam, if you're listening.

[Caleb Heron]

Pearl Jam or Creed or Three Doors down or Dodger.

[Josh Sharp]

Give us a travel show.

[Caleb Heron]

Give us a travel show. We'll talk about your music and then we'll eat some stuff.

[Josh Sharp]

Pearl Jam. I love everything you've done in Van Halen, and I think it would be great if you gave us a travel show.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm talking to Pearl Jam of Van Halen fame. I love what you've done.

[Josh Sharp]

Eddie Vedder. Might as well jump, baby. Let's go.

[Caleb Heron]

Might as well jump into our travel show that we're hosting. Thank you. I went to two great restaurants this week.

[Josh Sharp]

Say more.

[Caleb Heron]

Gertrude's. You been?

[Josh Sharp]

No. Is this the neighborhood? You want the public to know what neighborhood you live in?

[Caleb Heron]

Great latkes.

[Josh Sharp]

Great latkes at Gertrude's.

[Caleb Heron]

And an incredible raw box bar.

[Josh Sharp]

What neighborhood?

[Caleb Heron]

I want to say it was like, further south. Maybe it was like closer to Park Slope, but I don't think it was Park Slope.

[Josh Sharp]

There's Gerties in Williamsburg that has great luck.

[Caleb Heron]

Gertie's. This is their. This is their sister.

[Josh Sharp]

There we go. They have. They have great luck because at Gertie's, Gertrude.

[Caleb Heron]

Amazing. And then Strange Delight.

[Josh Sharp]

Strange delight.

[Caleb Heron]

New restaurant.

[Josh Sharp]

It seems full of whimsy in Brooklyn.

[Caleb Heron]

For New Orleans food.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, come on now.

[Caleb Heron]

I had hush puppies. I had crab dip with house made salties.

[Josh Sharp]

Come on.

[Caleb Heron]

I had a fried shrimp sandwich.

[Josh Sharp]

You're a guy who loves New Orleans, right? Like I am.

[Caleb Heron]

I haven't even been to the city of New Orleans.

[Josh Sharp]

You're joking. It's one of the only cities we have.

[Caleb Heron]

I know.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm not joking.

[Caleb Heron]

I know.

[Josh Sharp]

I think that's.

[Caleb Heron]

I know.

[Josh Sharp]

So true. Actually, I take it back. My so true is New Orleans is one of the only cities we have.

[Caleb Heron]

Name the others, Country. Name the others.

[Josh Sharp]

I can't. It's one of the only.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, my goodness.

[Josh Sharp]

You want me to finally give a number one and not an echelon number one city? New Orleans?

[Caleb Heron]

Really?

[Josh Sharp]

Well, actually, what I think is true is that there's a lot of great cities in this country. But a lot of them are sort of different versions of the same thing. You know what I mean? Whereas New Orleans is only New Orleans.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what I mean?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Someone takes you to the cool neighborhood in insert fun city here, and you're like, yeah, I've. I've. I understand what natural wine tastes like. You know, like, it's like. It's got its own energy, but it's sort of like this is versions of the cool parts of the city where we live.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

It's beautiful and unique in their ways, but it's like they're. They're drawing from a blueprint.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

New Orleans. You're like, damn, ain't nobody doing New Orleans but New Orleans.

[Caleb Heron]

It's French. French.

[Josh Sharp]

It's French. It's Southern. It's just Creole. It's like, so only it in a way that no other city is to me.

[Caleb Heron]

I've been dying to go.

[Josh Sharp]

You have to go.

[Caleb Heron]

I want to go.

[Josh Sharp]

You would love it.

[Caleb Heron]

I really want to go.

[Josh Sharp]

They do love to drink there.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm certain. I know. And that's. That's part of the issue for me. New Orleans and Vegas.

[Josh Sharp]

But they love to eat, too.

[Caleb Heron]

That's why I want to go right there. I want to go to eat and I want to go. My friend does burlesque there. I want to go see her show.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, and great queer scene there. Like, every aspect. When you're going to, like, the great restaurant, it's just like, feels so New Orleans. You're like, this is like nothing else. And same with, like, burlesque. Like, this queer bar doesn't feel like any other one I've been into in United States of America.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Star Spangled Banner, number one song.

[Caleb Heron]

I want to do a voicemail with you. Get those headphones on. Oh, let's do a listener voicemail and see what they've got for us. Maybe something good.

[Josh Sharp]

I bet they got something nice.

[Caleb Heron]

Wait, these have a side, right? I can't tell. Do these have a side? Oh, I found it.

[Josh Sharp]

I have to be on the right side.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, I like it. I like to know, but I guess.

[Josh Sharp]

It doesn't really matter because it's mixed. This is mixed. Mixed.

[Caleb Heron]

It's mixed.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

This voicemail is mixed.

[Josh Sharp]

This is not mono.

[Caleb Heron]

No, no, mama. Hey, I have a quick question. I need to know why fast food breakfast is so delicious. Why is the cheese so good? Is it because it's plastic? Is it because it's too melty? Who knows? Thank you.

[Josh Sharp]

Wow. I can't remember the Last time I had a fast food breakfast. Oh. So I'm about to be out of my league and yet I have thoughts. Isn't the whole point of American cheese that it was sort of like engineered to melt? Right?

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, it was like made in a lab. To melt. Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

Like, I'm not joking. That is what it is. Yeah. I feel like that's the answer, right?

[Caleb Heron]

That's part of it. And also it's the grease and the carbs.

[Josh Sharp]

And the grease.

[Caleb Heron]

It's grease and carbs is what it is. And I'll tell you, McDonald's breakfast. You the most, the most stuck up person in the world couldn't tell me about a hash Brown at McDonald's. It's just fucking good.

[Josh Sharp]

It's. Everything has its context.

[Caleb Heron]

A Sausage McGriddle, there's a context with a slice of cheese is just sometimes correct. You don't always want it.

[Josh Sharp]

No.

[Caleb Heron]

Sometimes you want a beautifully fresh pastry with hand cut fruit and a cup of orange juice that was immediately squeezed out of. Sometimes you want that breakfast, but sometimes you want a McGriddle with cheese and a hash brown.

[Josh Sharp]

Don't you feel like you're eating it in your car always? No, I'm just feeling like when I'm having, when I'm wanting that, I'm wanting a diner, I'm wanting to sit down, I'm wanting that ambiance in addition to that grease and carb. But you're having it in the McDonald's. McDonald's.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm having it in the McDonald's. No, no, no. Never in the McDonald's.

[Josh Sharp]

That's what I mean.

[Caleb Heron]

Usually having it in my home, you're take.

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah, in the city of New York you're doing that.

[Caleb Heron]

I haven't had McDonald's in the city of New York.

[Josh Sharp]

But when you're in the heartland.

[Caleb Heron]

But if I'm in the heartland, I've had McDonald's many, many times. I've stayed out until 2, 3, 4 in the morning with my friends in LA.

[Josh Sharp]

Cool guy. Cool guy.

[Caleb Heron]

Well, that wasn't the point.

[Josh Sharp]

That's cool, Josh.

[Caleb Heron]

That wasn't the point.

[Josh Sharp]

We have to give that.

[Caleb Heron]

You know, I don't want to look cool on here already two in the.

[Josh Sharp]

Morning, that's a cool guy. But then when you fall followed up with 3, comma, 4.

[Caleb Heron]

But this is what you need to know is because the later you stay.

[Josh Sharp]

Out and bars close in LA at 2. So what is he doing at 3?

[Caleb Heron]

Friend's house.

[Josh Sharp]

You've gone to an after is what we Call an afters. You're only cool guys get invited.

[Caleb Heron]

You're a sick individual.

[Josh Sharp]

That's cool.

[Caleb Heron]

The point is, you stay out late, you have to sleep in late, and then when you wake up, you need something horrible to put in your stomach, and that's McDonald's.

[Josh Sharp]

That's when you call, I'm there in LA. Same exact circumstance. Two, three, four. In the morning. Morning. I've been at the afters. God, I've had the time of my life. New friends, old, new silver, gold. You understand? I'm waking up feeling this exact type of way.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

You know what? I'm getting going to all time. Yeah. Or I'm doing. I'm doing breakfast tacos from. What's it called? Homestay.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm getting home state.

[Caleb Heron]

Home state.

[Josh Sharp]

You're gonna homestay.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm gonna tell you. I'm gonna tell you.

[Josh Sharp]

Rah rah McDonald's.

[Caleb Heron]

You want a breakfast and you're the same. You're gonna rah rah McDonald's. Donald's. Let me tell you something. You want a breakfast burrito in la?

[Josh Sharp]

Yeah.

[Caleb Heron]

Cafe Los Feliz.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, I've been there once. That they're good.

[Caleb Heron]

Cafe Los Feliz on Hillhurst. Is it Cafe Los Felios or Los Feliz Cafe? That one. I always forget my guy Arson, who works behind the counter.

[Josh Sharp]

What a name.

[Caleb Heron]

Arson, like the Arson, like sets fires. It's Cafe Los Feliz because there's two of them.

[Josh Sharp]

Cafe Spicy with a name like Arson.

[Caleb Heron]

Sojuk. So they have a Sojuk one that's spicy.

[Josh Sharp]

And what's Sojuk?

[Caleb Heron]

I don't know. It's probably what they name it. But they have a spicy thing.

[Josh Sharp]

Should I know what that is?

[Caleb Heron]

I think that's just the name of their spicy burger. I don't think it's a thing.

[Josh Sharp]

Okay.

[Caleb Heron]

But my trick there is you don't get the spicy one. You actually get the regular one. And then you get a bunch of their spicy chipotle sauce and fucking.

[Josh Sharp]

I love that. Are you a spice queen?

[Caleb Heron]

I am a spice queen.

[Josh Sharp]

Me, too.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm a spice queen. And make it hurt. Okay.

[Josh Sharp]

Do you like to go like. Like Szechuan style? Like the peppercorns that numb you?

[Caleb Heron]

Numb.

[Josh Sharp]

That's such its own, you know, ecosystem within the spice ecosystem. I love it.

[Caleb Heron]

You're in Alhambra.

[Josh Sharp]

Wait, what is it called?

[Caleb Heron]

Alhambra neighborhood. I know.

[Josh Sharp]

Oh, yes, yes, yes. I thought this was a restaurant.

[Caleb Heron]

Incredible Sichuan food. Incredible. Honestly, pretty good. Spicy Asian Food at Birds of a Feather in Williamsburg, actually.

[Josh Sharp]

Yes, and yes. Another one I like, too. And I'm forgetting the name, so I'm just gonna affirm. Birds of a Feather.

[Caleb Heron]

Birds of feather. Pretty good spice on that.

[Josh Sharp]

Pretty good spice.

[Caleb Heron]

They have a spicy Szechuan okra at Birds of a Feather that numbed my mouth real nice.

[Josh Sharp]

I love okra.

[Caleb Heron]

I do, too, in every form. Bring it to me in any way I want it.

[Josh Sharp]

Pickled okra. Come on.

[Caleb Heron]

Fried, of course.

[Josh Sharp]

Fried, of course.

[Caleb Heron]

Fried, of course.

[Josh Sharp]

Pickled okra is really good because there's so much texture, so much crunch, so much slime. It's fun.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, I like the slime, for some reason. Doesn't sound enjoyable, does it? But it is.

[Josh Sharp]

It is in that context. It is.

[Caleb Heron]

But it is. Joshua, it's been an incredible treat to have you on the show.

[Josh Sharp]

It's been an honor.

[Caleb Heron]

We love you here.

[Josh Sharp]

Well, it's, you know. Thank you for welcoming me into your home.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah.

[Josh Sharp]

I don't know when we're gonna start rolling. This on air has been off the whole time. I assume that lights up when we start.

[Caleb Heron]

Oh, we're not putting this out. No, this was just. I wanted to hang out with you.

[Josh Sharp]

And I thought it was sort of wild to have that there in front of me. Not on.

[Caleb Heron]

Yeah, we're not doing this. I can't stress this enough. We're not recording this. You'll never see this come out good. I was just like, I want to hang out with Josh. I wonder if he'd come to midtown Manhattan.

[Josh Sharp]

Hey, Chance, do me a favor. I'm trying to hang out with Josh. We got to put on this whole stunt like we're doing.

[Caleb Heron]

Book him on the show. You guys can play on your computers.

[Josh Sharp]

That's what producing podcasts is, right? Playing on your computer.

[Caleb Heron]

Let's play on your computers. I'll pretend to do a podcast with him. We'll just spend some time to Together.

[Josh Sharp]

No, it was a blessing. I feel blessed, sugar. Thank you.

[Caleb Heron]

You are blessed, sugar. And you come back anytime you want.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm going to take you up on that.

[Caleb Heron]

Okay. Love you.

[Josh Sharp]

I'm making a copy of the keys.

[Caleb Heron]

Thank you. Bye. That was a Headgum podcast. Hey.

[Josh Sharp]

Hey.

[Caleb Heron]

I'm Lamorin Morris. And I'm Kyle Sheverin. And we are here interrupting your workout to tell you about the lemorning after podcast. Now on Headgum. That's right. Every Wednesday, a new episode drops, and we wait. Lamorn, what are you doing over there?

[Josh Sharp]

It's nothing.

[Caleb Heron]

Just polishing my Emmy. Why? Well, because we're now the only official Headgum podcast hosted by an Emmy winner. Is that true? You're probably not, but Jake Johnson's on Headgum. Does he have an Emmy? No, but. But he has been a guest on the Morning after, which might be an even bigger honor. I mean, and we have other amazing guests like Glenn Powell, Raven Simone, the cast of New Girl, and many, many more.

[Josh Sharp]

More.

[Caleb Heron]

Plus, we play games. We tell stories. We poll the fans for questions. We poll them for questions. Just pulling them constantly up and down, sideways, backwards. It's a lot less weird than it sounds. You'll see. Subscribe to the Morning after on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Casts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And watch video episodes on YouTube. New episodes drop every Wednesday.