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Steph Tolev
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Olivia
Also, the dog's not allowed on the bed when he's there. He hates the dog in the bed.
Steph Tolev
I think he's right. I'm really on his side. Wow.
Olivia
All on his side. Wow.
Steph Tolev
Dog out of bed.
Olivia
Dog was in the bed this morning. I'll tell you that. He ain't here. Dog is snuggling in my head.
Steph Tolev
You keep doing this as if you might secretly be kissing the dog. You're like, no, I would never kiss the dog. The dog's gone.
Olivia
I kiss.
Steph Tolev
I kissed you.
Olivia
I kiss her nose.
Steph Tolev
Well, we are both with Olivia. Do you know something? This cracked me up the other day. I'm also with Tova Silverman.
Olivia
Okay. Yes.
Steph Tolev
And we went to dinner, all of us in New York, just because I was like, we should go to dinner. And Tova grew up, like, Orthodox Jewish. And so I had seen something. Did I tell you this already? I had saw something. I just moved to New York recently, and I had seen in my neighborhood a bunch of the Hasidic Jewish guys wearing those big fur hats.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Which I wasn't familiar with. And so I was like, tova, oh my God. I was waiting to ask you, what do the big fur hats mean? Like, what. How should I interact with the fur hats? And she was like. She was like, oh, those guys, it's like 90. They're celebrating something. 10. They're just really pious. And I was like, okay, would it be appropriate, like, if I pass them on the street, should I say, like, congratulations or any. Like, how should I interact? How should I be a neighbor? She was like, they don't want to talk to you. And I was like, fab. Okay. Fabulous. Love that point of view on the world, by the way.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And then Olivia. It just really cracked me up. Olivia was like, wait till I also had a very earnest. She was like, you know how sweet she is.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
She was like. I also had a question. I saw a boy the other day wearing two yarmulkers. What it like, one on front, one on back. What does that mean? And Tova was like, I think you just saw a boy being silly. Like. Like, Olivia and I were both kind of like, ooh, another cultural practice.
Olivia
Another good one.
Steph Tolev
I was like, yeah, boys can just be silly in every. In everything.
Olivia
Also, fun bit, though. Double Yama.
Steph Tolev
Fun bit.
Olivia
Also, I kind of want her to say, take the fur hat and try it on, just to see how they wouldn't like that.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Well, I was like, why don't they want to talk to me? And she was like, well, she was like, they don't love women. Like, don't talk to women. I was like, I'm fine with that. And then she was like, also, they, you know, gay people. And I was like, fantastic. Fantastic. Really? Any outsiders, though? She was like, they're not. They're not interested.
Olivia
So wait, you live in New York now?
Steph Tolev
I do. I'm. Yeah, I still have the place in Kansas City.
Olivia
But you're here. You just here. You bop in, you bop out.
Steph Tolev
I bop in, I bop out.
Olivia
You're in and out like a fiddler's elbow.
Steph Tolev
I bought you. Love that one.
Olivia
I love it so much. I say all the time. I love so much.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I'm in and out. I'm in and out. What's going on with you?
Olivia
Not I'm in.
Steph Tolev
You're in.
Olivia
But I'm also out.
Steph Tolev
You're always on the road.
Olivia
I. I'm dying.
Steph Tolev
Somebody please help me, dog.
Olivia
I. I'm a road mutt. I hate to bring it to you. I am out there. I'm dying.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
My back's killing me.
Steph Tolev
What's going on out there?
Olivia
Oh, I have a back pillow for the plane now. I'm. That. I'm so embarrassing. I get on, and I have my. My lumbar support pillow, and I gotta shimmy it behind me. And everyone looks at me. It's so embarrassing.
Steph Tolev
That's humiliating.
Olivia
And then I got upgraded to first glass embarrassing. So I already took my sleepy pills, and I was, like, sleeping, like, Stephanie. And I was like. And some guy beside me, he's like, I think they're calling your name. And I. I was. I rushed up and then I forgot my back pillow had to come back through the curtain. And the guy was like, your pillow? And I was like, ugh. It was mortifying.
Steph Tolev
That's humiliating.
Olivia
It was so. And it's so gross now. I should probably get a new one. It's like all morphed. It probably stinks.
Steph Tolev
Ew.
Olivia
Ew. I don't know. I'm sweating up there. There was a fly.
Steph Tolev
Steph, your back pillow stinks.
Olivia
There is a fly on my plane. The other day I almost called the fucking police, you know. Disgusting. It is a fly on my aisle. I'm like, I'm shit. It's my stinky pillow. That's probably what it was.
Steph Tolev
Well, you gotta do something about your back stench.
Olivia
The back is bad. I'm just. I. It's so much. These, these clubs are killing me. And here's the problem.
Steph Tolev
Say it.
Olivia
I'm not selling as many tickets as.
Steph Tolev
One would like, call them stuff.
Olivia
I'm going on Tik Tok live every night. You know how mortifying it is?
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I sit in my house, I put my ring light on, I drip sweat. Joe Rogan, I drip sweat. And then I, I. It's like, it's hell on earth. And I'm like screaming at people cuz nobody on Tik Tok buys tickets. So they don't know. They're like, you're coming to Vancouver. I'm like, I'm doing a theater. So I'm like screaming at these people.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Killing me.
Steph Tolev
And they're not converting.
Olivia
They are. They. They once I yell at them on Tick Tock, they buy the tickets. But they don't know they need to.
Steph Tolev
Be yelled up screaming. Your fans want to be bullied by you as well is one thing.
Olivia
They, oh, they love it.
Steph Tolev
Because you have a dominatrix thing going on.
Olivia
I there last night actually, at the store, there's this guy in the front and he was so scared. I'm like, what are you doing? He's like, you're so powerful. I'm scared to answer. And then I was like, yes. And I got like crazy. I like stood on the stool and I was like, yeah. And I was like, wait, whoa. I need to calm the. He was crazy.
Steph Tolev
He was hard, by the way. He was coming rock hard.
Olivia
Oh, he was so scared.
Steph Tolev
That's pathetic.
Olivia
It was, it was embarrassing. Like, as if I'd.
Steph Tolev
That I can't do the, you know, some gay guys are into that, like the like, tell me I'm pathetic and humiliate me thing. And I'm Like, I can't, because you actually are. Well, it is, like, actually can't get. It's like I'm actually pitying you.
Olivia
No, it's repulsive.
Steph Tolev
Crawling around on your hands and knees.
Olivia
Also the crumbs on my floor. Disgusting little pebbles in your knee.
Steph Tolev
You want to, like, nip at my feet?
Olivia
What is wrong with you? They do that.
Steph Tolev
Well, you know, sex can be so many things. Nip at the feet, whatever they want. You know, I just. I. The pathetic thing. I'm like you, actually. If I. I will find you pathetic if you're being pathetic. And it won't turn me on.
Olivia
No, no, no. I'm not turned on by you being a disgusting, nippy pig.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Like being in the front room being like you. So powerful miss. Ugh.
Olivia
No, I. I want you to be. Yeah. I want you to hate me. That turns me on when you're not laughing at me.
Steph Tolev
Now we're talking.
Olivia
Now I'm pissed.
Steph Tolev
Now we're talking. Treat me like shit.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Wait, are we pathetic?
Olivia
No. Now come back to me. You balk on our feet. Please.
Steph Tolev
We're begging for crumbs in the kitchen.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
What's going? Boyfriend? Yes or no?
Olivia
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Still this guy. Oh, you mean this handsome boy.
Steph Tolev
You guys are really into each other, I'm gathering.
Olivia
I'm obsessed with him. I've never been obsessed with a man before.
Steph Tolev
It's really showing.
Olivia
Oh, I'm. I'm thrilled.
Steph Tolev
I'm seeing it in the Internet presence.
Olivia
Oh, I. I've never posted a man more in my life. I've never. He's so hot.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I need everyone to see. He's also. He's like. His uncle is Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore.
Steph Tolev
That shows.
Olivia
And he looks exactly like him.
Steph Tolev
That shows. Yeah.
Olivia
And it's like a weird thing because I've, like, always kind of had the hots for Shooter, so it's like. It's a fun little thing I got going on here. I hate to break it to you. I like what's happening here.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
But, yeah, he's also so funny, and he's so supportive. He. I just taped my special in Boston and he did my. He. He was the guy in charge of my. My. My. My, like, lines. My. My jokes. He did the teleprompter for me.
Steph Tolev
He did your teleprompter? You're employing him?
Olivia
I. I didn't pay him.
Steph Tolev
Oh, good. Thank God. I didn't want him on the pan roll. What? You been to Toronto recently?
Olivia
No. I'm going actually next week for my friend's wedding. I'm really, yeah, I'm, I'm doing a speech at this wedding and it's going to be.
Steph Tolev
You have the speech done yet?
Olivia
No, I, I, I do it last minute.
Steph Tolev
What are the themes? What are you looking at here?
Olivia
She and I used to be discussing horrors. So it's going to be a lot about how we were gross. We, we had this thing called boyfriend nights where we would try to go meet a boyfriend together. And we went to good time at Davey Wayne's one night.
Steph Tolev
Oh God. Oh. Not good time at Davey Ways.
Olivia
I must have been quite drunk. I wasn't, I was sad. But I took home this guy. Oh. We went back to their one guy's house and I fudged the one guy in the bedroom while she fucked the other guy in the living room. And she came to wake me up in the morning because she's like, we have to get out of here. And I was like mid fucking and she looked at me and I went, I know, I'm embarrassed. Like as I was fucking this guy. It was so bad. He was so gross. It was awful. I'm like mortified by it. And then.
Steph Tolev
Did you fuck previously and now you're going back for more?
Olivia
No, no, it was the same night, thank God. And she was slept on a bunch of a couch cushion pillows they put on the ground. It was, it was sad.
Steph Tolev
But you only fucked him once.
Olivia
Yes. Oh, a little muskrat man.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Oh God.
Steph Tolev
You let him in your special place?
Olivia
I let so many pigs in my special place. I'm like, I'm really waiting for my tits to leak when this special drops.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, yeah.
Olivia
And they're gonna leak hard. My face is in it. I'm always like, look at these guys. I don't know why I didn't, I didn't learn not to put the face in it.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Stupid.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, it's not good stuff. We gotta get some protection for you.
Olivia
I know.
Steph Tolev
I cut your face out of the tip picks.
Olivia
It's too late. It's out there. It's so, it's, there's so many out there.
Steph Tolev
You're done for.
Olivia
Oh, I'm screwed.
Steph Tolev
You're cooked.
Olivia
They're actually not bad though. When they come out, I'll be like, those aren't min.
Steph Tolev
They are. Yeah. I wouldn't mind people seeing you tits. Yeah, it could be good.
Olivia
It could.
Steph Tolev
Doesn't matter to me.
Olivia
Have you been to Smokehouse?
Steph Tolev
Oh yeah, I just went to smoke.
Olivia
I was There the other night. It's my boyfriend's favorite place. We went there for anniversary five nights ago. What? We went five nights ago. I'm spinning. You.
Steph Tolev
Did they give you the free postcard? Yes, they gave you the free postcard.
Olivia
We bought. We bought the picture, though. This time we liked it. Oh, we were sick. I paid 15 bucks for the worst photo of my life.
Steph Tolev
Smokehouse is this. I. Have y'all been. It's this iconic LA restaurant for people who don't know. It's like right by the studios in Burbank.
Olivia
Nothing else around it.
Steph Tolev
Nothing else around it. Just Smokehouse and then the studios.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
And it. You go, by the way, the food's okay. Like, I don't think the food's amazing.
Olivia
It's fine.
Steph Tolev
It's really the ambiance. It's the bread. The garlic bread's amazing.
Olivia
Garlic bread.
Steph Tolev
You think I'm kidding about the garlic bread? It's fucking amazing.
Olivia
Nuts.
Steph Tolev
And you go. And then they'll. Sometimes they'll come around with a photographer and go, would you like a complimentary postcard of your evening? And they take a picture of you and then they run to the back and print a postcard.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
That's like logoed out. It's like Smokehouse brought to you by Goodyear Tires or whatever.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
But there's a picture of you at dinner.
Olivia
It is nice. It's always a different person of the photo. We've gone. We go quite a bit. So it's always some like Russian who's get. Who gets fired like that that week.
Steph Tolev
Don't call her a Russian.
Olivia
Well, also, I made the. A big scene last time because they didn't put me at a booth and I need the booth.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
So I sat down. I'm like, I can't sit here. I'm not gonna enjoy my dinner. So then I went, I went up. Oh, I had a big sciatica problem that night. I went up, I go, I'm sorry. And big Academy Award nominated acting. I go, I need the booth. Oh, can I get a booth?
Steph Tolev
Oh, yeah.
Olivia
Immediately got the booth.
Steph Tolev
Like, we've heard about you. The airlines.
Olivia
Yeah, we're just glad you didn't bring.
Steph Tolev
That smelly ass pillow.
Olivia
Stinks.
Steph Tolev
That stank ass pillow you carry around.
Olivia
It's great. I love Smokehouse. Have you seen. Have you been there when the guy, whatever angel his name is, sings Elvis impersonator. He dyes his eyebrows black.
Steph Tolev
Yes.
Olivia
He's fun.
Steph Tolev
What's your Smokehouse order?
Olivia
I think the prime rib or. I've been getting the salmon. Blackened salmon.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, yeah.
Olivia
So I'm gonna get the shrimp cocktail, and I get two dirty.
Steph Tolev
Gotta get the shrimp cocktail. Every time. I'm going. I'm going. Rack lamb with that mint jelly sauce.
Olivia
Oh, and they have those little things, the little feet things on them.
Steph Tolev
Oh, yeah, yeah. They put the little booties on.
Olivia
Little booties.
Steph Tolev
And the bacon wrap. Scallops.
Olivia
Oh, yeah.
Steph Tolev
If the table is amenable, I'm having the bacon scallops.
Olivia
Okay. Okay.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. It's good stuff, the shrimp cocktail, though. A shrimp cocktail at a classy joint.
Olivia
You need a shrimp cocktail. I need the jumbo shrimp. I like it chilled on a little ice thing.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Nice.
Steph Tolev
I need an oyster.
Olivia
If there's.
Steph Tolev
Well, Smokehouse doesn't do oysters, but had they. Oysters. Oysters. I would order.
Olivia
I went out. I went. I moistered out. I was just in Boston. I. I sucked back. Oh, I'm.
Steph Tolev
How many did you do?
Olivia
Oh, how many is too many? Before we. Before I answer this honestly.
Steph Tolev
Given. Look, given my druthers. Given free reign at the oyster bar. I do a hundred.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
I love oysters.
Olivia
I. Oof. I think I did in total the whole week I was there. Probably 50.
Steph Tolev
That's a lot of oysters.
Olivia
A lot of oysters.
Steph Tolev
That's a lot of oysters.
Olivia
It didn't really perk my percativity down there. I used to get all, like, jizzed up. It's like an aphrodisiac, isn't it?
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I think it's more of like a. It's. So how does aphrodisiac work? Is it supposed to be like, it makes your wet. It's like an actual technical thing. Or is it that you do it with the person and the sucking of the oyster and, like, I thought it was supposed to be more like a. You know what I'm saying? Like, it only works if I'm doing it with you. And we're trying to. And it's like, look at me slurp this oyster. Now you go. Now we're imagining things.
Olivia
Oh, no. Because I'm putting on way too much horserash.
Steph Tolev
Like, yes, I'm hurting.
Olivia
I'm crying almost every time. This is not.
Steph Tolev
I'm getting little chips off the bottom that are like. I'm biting on them. I think my tip. My tooth is broken. Oysters are a type of shellfish that consider an aphrodisiac. It boosts libido. Okay.
Olivia
Boosts libido. Okay.
Steph Tolev
So that is supposed to happen may improve sexual performance or desire, but science hasn't proven it.
Olivia
I don't care about science.
Steph Tolev
As if I have no interest in science.
Olivia
I really don't.
Steph Tolev
I've got my ideas. What was your guys latest fight about?
Olivia
Oh, there's dog hair in his car. Because we, we live in East Hollywood and I, I move around our car. So when he's away, I'll, I'll move. Cause it's street cleaning, so I have to move the car. So I, I've become for some reason, designated car mover.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
He never moves at once.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
So sometimes if this is the invisible labor of women. By the way, excuse me. Every fucking Wednesday and Friday I'm up at 7am Looking for a spot in East Hollywood. Suck my ass.
Steph Tolev
Being erased.
Olivia
Yeah, I'm killing. Exactly. You're being erased. I'm almost gone. So sometimes I had to put my dog in his car.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I put a sheet on the back and he was like, well, there's a couple of dog hairs on my dashboard. And I was like, do you want to get up? And then I like lost my fucking mind. And then he was like, whoa. I'm like, don't want me. And then we just like screamed. And then I went to leave and he's like, no, don't leave. Like this, Give me a hug. And I was like this. You know, you get pissing off, you just move your hand like a kid. I'm like, no, I'm not. And then that was it. It was over.
Steph Tolev
You're screaming at each other.
Olivia
Oh, I scream because he gets this little bit of a tone and it like triggers me and I'm like, no. And then I just scream.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I said, I don't, I can't handle. It's a, it's a snip. There's one tone. My dad used to give me this tone and I don't like the tone.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And the second I hear it, I like, I'm like, no, we're not doing this.
Steph Tolev
It's like, Steph.
Olivia
No, it's more like. It's a smug tone.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, smugness.
Olivia
It's like, well, there's hair is in my car. And it's like. Did you move the car at 7am for the last seven months? No. You didn't. So I'm allowed to have dog hair wherever the I want?
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
In my opinion, the dog hair can be wherever the I want it to be.
Steph Tolev
Now why did the dog have to go in the car?
Olivia
Because I think a vet trip or like, I'm dropping her off somewhere and I. My car is like. I don't know. I probably could also, but then I just switch the car. How annoying it is to switch the cars. I have one parking spot that I'm going in the street and putting the hazards on. I'm switching out. What am I. Yeah. Some Armenian man that has no life.
Steph Tolev
No.
Olivia
I have things to do.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
No offense to the Armenian men with no life.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
But I. There's a lot. In my neighborhood. There's Armenian.
Steph Tolev
Armenian men watching this. Like, what the fuck?
Olivia
Yeah. What?
Steph Tolev
Catching a crazy stray in your fight with your boyfriend.
Olivia
It was fine. It was done. That was our latest one. They're always stupid. It's never like, a big, serious thing.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And do you find it healthy the way that you guys do? Conflict?
Olivia
I think so.
Steph Tolev
I'd love to get him in here. I wish he was here.
Olivia
He'd be so mad.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
No, no, no. I think it is. I think he's. I think also we had very similar fathers growing up. The same way. They would yell at us that we are just. It's yelly.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
With yelly households.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Not a calm. Not a calming, not calm dad. No.
Steph Tolev
Got it. Interesting. Yeah, I like that. Well, it seems like you guys are making it work.
Olivia
We're making it work. We're not making it work.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. We're.
Olivia
We're talking about marriage. We're talking about all sorts of stuff.
Steph Tolev
You're talking about marriage.
Olivia
I want to get married. I'm almost 40. I need to be engaged before I'm 40. I'm embarrassed.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I'm getting engaged at 42. What the hell is that? Stupid. Yeah, it's before 40 or I'm done.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Okay. And so is he working on that?
Olivia
He better be. I've sent him a million rings. I'm like, I'm getting lower, too. I said, like, an expensive one now. I'm like, I don't care. Give me a ring pop. At this point, I don't care. We're getting low on the.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. And he needs to get to work.
Olivia
Well, I don't know what he's doing. Yeah, I think so.
Steph Tolev
I love that. What did. What age do you think you'll die?
Olivia
I'll die. Probably 60. Late 60s.
Steph Tolev
You think late 60s?
Olivia
I don't know.
Steph Tolev
So you're just thinking you're, like, two thirds of the way through?
Olivia
I think so. There's a lot of, like, bad.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I don't know.
Steph Tolev
Well, there's.
Olivia
You're going to Die me.
Steph Tolev
Nothing would surprise me.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't. I think. You know, I do think I'm just about out of the. I never thought. When I was little, I never thought I'd live to be, like, 20. Like, I always. I have. When I was a very. I know. When I was a very little kid, I have vivid memories of being like. I would see people older than 20 and be like, that's not happening for me. I have no idea what that's about.
Olivia
That's terrible.
Steph Tolev
It's crazy. And then it. I did. So every day has been kind of like a dream since then. And now. And now my biggest fear in my 20s was like, oh, I hope I. If I have to die young. Ish. I hope I die when people will still say, like, man, he was gonna do great stuff.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And I think I'm almost out of that.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
I think if I die, like, two years from now, that's not gonna be the commentary.
Olivia
Oh, do.
Steph Tolev
I mean.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Because I've had enough of a shot.
Olivia
Okay. Yeah.
Steph Tolev
At doing stuff. I think people are gonna be like, maybe I'll be like, oh, he was a great guy. But I don't think they're gonna be like, oh, the potential, you know?
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
The potential. Conversation around my death is almost itself dead. I'm turning 30 in January.
Olivia
You're turning 30?
Steph Tolev
I am.
Olivia
You're so young.
Steph Tolev
Yes.
Olivia
Oh, my God.
Steph Tolev
Yes.
Olivia
What the hell?
Steph Tolev
Spread the word.
Olivia
Oh, my God.
Steph Tolev
Turning 30 in January.
Olivia
Jeez. You're fine. Shut up, you young pig. What the hell? You're so young. I'm sorry. That was. That sounded very rude. Young pig is the real.
Steph Tolev
No, it's beautiful.
Olivia
You're so young. What the hell? I feel so old now.
Steph Tolev
I have no concerns. Yeah, I'm feeling. I'm chilling on the age thing. I'm excited for 30s.
Olivia
Yeah. Okay.
Steph Tolev
Any advice? You've been in it.
Olivia
Yeah. The FOMO goes away. That's my favorite part.
Steph Tolev
Really?
Olivia
Oh, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Ooh. Say more about that.
Olivia
Tuck in.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
People are out partying. The Netflix is a joke festival. Hilarious. Fucking Scooby Doo's here. Whoever the fuck the guy's name is with the tattoos. What's his name? The big guy who's at every fucking party. Big, not. He's like a tattoo, fully tattooed. He sings country stuff. Jelly Roll, Jelly Roll.
Steph Tolev
Scooby Doo. Scooby Doo is here.
Olivia
Scooby Doo is here. Come out, Scooby Doo is there. Whatever the. I don't. Every night, he was like. He him was. He was, like, hanging out at the Comedy Store and everyone was, like, losing their minds. Like, you missed the craziest night. I went. No, I didn't. I was home at 11 o'clock. I was fast asleep by 1102. And I watched an episode of Law and Order. Good night. Yeah, I. I have no cares anymore. Yeah, I've done it.
Steph Tolev
You're not.
Olivia
I've partied. Oh, not sad.
Steph Tolev
Sad to miss Scooby Doo.
Olivia
Don't give a about Scooby Doo. What a photo. Here's me, an artist I clearly don't know, and then put a photo. Like, it is making sense to me.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I'm also. I'm with you, but I've been that way.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
I'm not concerned about that. And I also. My friends don't even invite me to.
Olivia
That stuff anymore because you're just talking.
Steph Tolev
They know I'm not going.
Olivia
I almost. What was that party you had? We were giving away tattoos.
Steph Tolev
I did. I did do. So that's what I'll do.
Olivia
I should have gone.
Steph Tolev
This is my. This is my insurance policy against FOMO for myself, is that I don't go to anything I don't want. If I even kind of don't want to go, I skip.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I don't care what it is. Yeah, I'll skip. I'll skip anything. But the way that I ensure myself against that is I throw, like four sick parties a year of my own. And that I had a house party during Netflix as a joke right after I did my hour at my house because it was near the venue and. Yeah, we had a tattoo artist giving out tattoos.
Olivia
Yeah. I should have gone. Olivia invited me and I was like.
Steph Tolev
I think would have loved to have you.
Olivia
I. I think I was in bed. I'm not gonna lie. And then Olivia, there's three tattoos. I'm like. Well, now that I would have gone to.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Damn it.
Steph Tolev
At a tattoo artist. It was cool. We had karaoke.
Olivia
Okay, you lost me on that. But.
Steph Tolev
Well, you didn't have to do it, Steph.
Olivia
It's not the doing it. It's the people who think they're fucking the next America's Next Top fucking talent. And they're up there wailing away. I hate karaoke. I worked at karaoke bar for way too long. Yeah, I can get some problems now. I hate it.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Mind you, you're someone who gets on stage every night.
Olivia
Yeah. Yeah. And when I do. And guess what? When I do karaoke, I kill.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. What's your go to song.
Olivia
Alanis Morissette. You ought to know.
Steph Tolev
I knew it.
Olivia
I like. I really can't sing, but the way I deliver it.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Oh, I.
Steph Tolev
Because you and Alanis both have that primal sort of scary rage.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
That I respect. And I'm drawn to it.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I feel drawn to you as I am Alanis.
Olivia
Ok, good. Well, we're both Canadians, so that's good.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. And also, you're just very powerful.
Olivia
Thank you.
Steph Tolev
I feel drawn to you. Good. As you know, I'm a fan, but I. Do you guys both have that kind of thing where I'm like. I would like to tap into that someday.
Olivia
You'll tap in.
Steph Tolev
I'd like to tap.
Olivia
You've already tapped in.
Steph Tolev
I'm not rageful.
Olivia
No, but it's not you. It'd be nice, though. It's nicer.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
People like you when you're nice.
Steph Tolev
You don't want me to. You don't want me to. To go a little nuts with it.
Olivia
No. You could, but just I. I would recommend, career wise.
Steph Tolev
Don't do it.
Olivia
Stay nice. No, you. You still be rageful.
Steph Tolev
But you did call me a young p. See, that's on a show that I invited you on. I can definitely see where you're getting yourself.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Everyone's a pig to me. I'm a pig world. Pigs.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. That's fascinating, isn't it? It is.
Olivia
I'd eat out of a trough if I could. If I had a trough in my house, I'd be sucking it back right now.
Steph Tolev
What would you put in it?
Olivia
Oh, it's slop.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Oh, yeah. A bunch of just.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Oh. Just eating my own.
Steph Tolev
I don't give a. I make. There is a thing I make for myself often that's pretty much slob. What is Like a stir fry. I make a stir fry that's like onion sausage, black beans, rice, and then like Sichuan sauce.
Olivia
Oh, this is slop.
Steph Tolev
And I cook. It's just. It's like chipotle bowl at home. Slop.
Olivia
It's like.
Steph Tolev
And I put it in a big bowl and I just eat it.
Olivia
There's 902. What's. There's a full place up here. Faux cafe. It's my favorite Fall cafe, whatever the you Americans say it. Fall cafe. I order this thing and I call it the slop.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Well, I'll order three fresh rolls to myself, and then I'll get this thing. It's like vermicelli noodles, shrimp and beef. And I put all the sauce on it. And I. I don't even think I swallow. I just massage it down my gullet and I go and I. For hours and I. It's my, like, treat.
Steph Tolev
Three rolls for yourself?
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Like. Like bread rolls?
Olivia
No, no, three. Like fresh rolls.
Steph Tolev
Fresh rolls?
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Spring rolls.
Olivia
Yeah. But not the naughty part. Like the rice paper ones.
Steph Tolev
Oh, yeah.
Olivia
Still, they're big. They're. They're meaty. And there's shrimp in them and basil and stuff in there that I'm dipping.
Steph Tolev
You know how. That's a good one of those. A really good. Those rolls is hoi con sunset.
Olivia
Okay. I've never been there. Okay.
Steph Tolev
Very good.
Olivia
I simply must go.
Steph Tolev
Very, very good. You got to get over there.
Olivia
I'll go over there.
Steph Tolev
What's your favorite kind of food?
Olivia
Everything. I'm a fucking. I'm a pig.
Steph Tolev
You're a pig.
Olivia
Why haven't we eaten together?
Steph Tolev
You don't hit me up.
Olivia
Wow. Do I have any text messages from you, sir? Well, you don't even live here anymore.
Steph Tolev
Leave it in.
Olivia
Leave it.
Steph Tolev
Leave it in. We don't eat together because you don't hit me up.
Olivia
That could be true.
Steph Tolev
No, I haven't hit you up either. The phone works both ways. Of course. Yeah, I don't. You know what? Really, I. It's funny because I used to, like. I don't know if you were like this, but in my early 20s, I was like, every day. You were both there. You know, every day I was going, fucking work at 7am, get off at 4.30pm, go straight to a coffee, go straight to a dinner, work at the theater all night, do like. I was doing shit every minute of every day. If someone asked me to do one thing in a week now, it's like I have been shot with a rocket launcher.
Olivia
Yeah. Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I don't like doing. And my days this week while I've been in LA have been packed because it's people being like, but we got it, you know? And so then I have to see every fucking person I've ever known. And the fourth tier people really feel comfortable. Comfortable texting. The fourth tier people really feel people. People you have not talked to in months feel comfortable being like, well, we gotta get a coffee.
Olivia
And you're like, do we? About what?
Steph Tolev
About what? I don't know. You know? And then the craziest thing is podcast, you get. You get coffee with these people, and then I say, what's going on with you? And they go, I'm kind of boring. There's nothing new. Well, then why we do this. Then why'd I come out? Cuz I've got things to say.
Olivia
Yeah. Why are we here?
Steph Tolev
Just for me. It's an exercise in me just telling you about me.
Olivia
Yeah. No, that's absurd.
Steph Tolev
It's sick.
Olivia
It's also. Yeah. People don't realize what we're doing. All day long we're doing.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
At night I' not. I'm not doing nothing anymore. I hang with my boyfriend. That's it. See?
Steph Tolev
You have a boyfriend, though, but he's not here.
Olivia
And I. Tonight I have off. I'm talking in. I'm talking. I'll be fast asleep by 8:42, I'll promise you that.
Steph Tolev
You love to tuck away.
Olivia
I love to tuck away. I'm putting on my. I put on my lawn order. It's all I watch. I tuck in.
Steph Tolev
You're snug as a bug in a row.
Olivia
Oh, I'm snugged up. Me and my dog are just kissing lip to lip.
Steph Tolev
You do that?
Olivia
No.
Steph Tolev
Okay.
Olivia
She licks her ass a lot.
Steph Tolev
Well, white people will do that.
Olivia
No. Also, you know what? I have a golden retriever and she doesn't lick. She's not licky.
Steph Tolev
She doesn't like your face.
Olivia
No. Never licks good. Not even my hand.
Steph Tolev
No licks good.
Olivia
I know, I don't.
Steph Tolev
The dog should not be licking the mouth.
Olivia
No. When people do that. Someone tried to kiss my dog in the mouth. A stranger on the street. I was like, I'm calling the FBI.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I swear to God. She got on her hands and knees. I'm like, kissing her lips. It was crazy pathetic. No, it was sick. Nipping at the feet, begging.
Steph Tolev
Ugh.
Olivia
I don't want that. It makes me sick.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
She's always gnawing at her ass or gnawing at her paws. It's like, I don't want that. It's gross.
Steph Tolev
Gnawing at her paws.
Olivia
She's got allergies. It's a whole thing. Oh, she got her shot yesterday. Nightmare.
Steph Tolev
Well, hey, I have a question for you.
Olivia
Please.
Steph Tolev
No. Enough goofing around.
Olivia
Enough. Let's get to the serious.
Steph Tolev
Let's get serious. Wait, wait. This isn't what I was gonna ask, but.
Olivia
God.
Steph Tolev
Yes or no on God. No, no, God.
Olivia
No. God.
Steph Tolev
Not at all.
Olivia
No. This is my. This is my theory on God. You ready for it? I think I said it on the last podcast I did here, but this is okay. When I was very young, my grandma was very religious. I used to go to church with her on Sundays. And my other My dad's mom was religious. I was mom's mom. My parents weren't really.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
So my grandma would make us pray every night. We'd sit at the end of our bed and go. Gentle Jesus, meek and mile. Look upon a little child.
Steph Tolev
He did like three genocides, which is a whole thing.
Olivia
Whatever the fuck he did. I don't know what he did. And my grandma says, pick three things you. You wish. I. I said, I hope no one in my family ever gets aids, cancer or license. Very specific. Three things I knew about when I was young.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, tough. Three things.
Olivia
And then my sister had lice for like two years. And I was like, well, guess what? God doesn't exist. And I was like, young. And I was like, no, I'm over it. That was it.
Steph Tolev
Is there. Nope. Is there no part of you that goes, well, no one in the family's got aids.
Olivia
Well, no. Bunch of people died of cancer. My family. So I was like, well, we're done here. I asked for three things. They simply didn't happen.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Do you believe in God?
Steph Tolev
No, I don't think. I don't know. But you know, it's.
Olivia
I want. I like, my boyfriend's religious.
Steph Tolev
There's a power. What kind of religion?
Olivia
Born in a Christian. Yeah. No. Disgust.
Steph Tolev
Sorry, sorry.
Olivia
Trust me, it's very. It's what? Yes.
Steph Tolev
He chose.
Olivia
No, no. His parents. Oh, yeah.
Steph Tolev
But he's still with it.
Olivia
I mean, he doesn't, he doesn't practice. His family's still all praised.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. But he does he believe in Christian God?
Olivia
I think he does.
Steph Tolev
I'm sorry, when I said disgusting. When I started to say disgusting, it wasn't at the idea of Christianity. I actually like Christians. I know you don't care, but I'm saying really, for me, genuinely, it was the idea that he like a late in life Christian scares me.
Olivia
No, no, he was. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no.
Steph Tolev
That's what I thought. We were going.
Olivia
No, no, no. When he was a kid, his parents and the whole thing.
Steph Tolev
That's fine. Your grandfather didn't.
Olivia
Your grandfather didn't. I guess. But he's like, yeah. When he told me he's religious, I was like, oh, I think I'm an atheist. And he was like, what do you mean? And I was like, we're not getting into this. So I'm like, just so you know, now I don't believe. I don't want to get. I want to believe.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I wish there was something I believe I believed in so I didn't fear dying all the time, I feel like that would be nice, but I just don't have it.
Steph Tolev
Do you fear death?
Olivia
Oh, every minute of my life.
Steph Tolev
Really?
Olivia
It's bad.
Steph Tolev
Wow.
Olivia
I spiral every night.
Steph Tolev
You doing anything about it?
Olivia
Oh, I don't know what to do about it.
Steph Tolev
I used to have a horrible fear of death.
Olivia
What do you. What do you do?
Steph Tolev
I read a lot about it, and I thought about it constantly on purpose. I would, like, very intentionally, I was like, I am not going to live my life this way. And I would just. I would just. I would read a lot of quotes about it.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
I would, like. I would think I would just. Anything I could find about death, I would read about it. It was like exposure therapy, honestly.
Olivia
Okay, maybe I should.
Steph Tolev
I'm not suggesting it because it might really not work out for you.
Olivia
I was like, I've. Since I've been a kid. I remember when I was really young, I start crying. My parents would come in and check on me, like, what's wrong? I'm gonna die. And they're like, yeah, good mad.
Steph Tolev
Very, very young for me as well.
Olivia
Like, I'm talking, like, earliest memories, me crying in bed, thinking about death.
Steph Tolev
Same sobbing being. I remember. I think I said this on another episode recently. I remember very vividly one day just sobbing all day long. My mom was like, what is going on? What's wrong? And I was like, I don't. What if we don't get to play soccer after we die? I was obsessed with the idea that I'm gonna die and not get to play soccer anymore. Didn't like soccer that much. Didn't like soccer that much. That's how I knew. I was like, there's something else going on.
Olivia
Something else is going on.
Steph Tolev
It's not about the soccer.
Olivia
It's not about the soccer.
Steph Tolev
It's about my place in this big, crazy thing we call life.
Olivia
It is. I know. It's. It. Yeah. I. I don't know. I. I don't want to think about it, but I do, and whatever.
Steph Tolev
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Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
Like I'm going. I'm going to meet up with people who have already gone. Probably not in like a heaven or hell situation, but I'm going to. On a journey that they have been on. People that have left already and I'm. Everyone else is going to catch up with me later. Whoever stays behind will catch up with me.
Olivia
All right, well, that's.
Steph Tolev
This is how I've chosen to think.
Olivia
Of it that's spiraling in your head right now. I am. No, I need. I need to read something because it's. I'm Getting weird. Weird with it again. I go through phases.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And now my sister had a baby. And then I just, I just was like, she's so beautiful and cute. I love her so much. And I was just like literally thinking about her dying. I was like, well, this is a new spiral. Yeah, I don't like this one. This one's even worse. And then I told my sister, she's like, what the your problem? She's like, don't do this. This is sick.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, she's. Your sister's right.
Olivia
He is.
Steph Tolev
It's crazy to look at the baby.
Olivia
I know. What the hell?
Steph Tolev
Yeah, but it's normal as well. It's crazy. But it's not.
Olivia
Let's get off this. Ask me what you're gonna ask me. Damn it.
Steph Tolev
You don't like this?
Olivia
The death.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. That's so interesting.
Olivia
Older too, I guess, because I'm like almost 40, so it's like. I know.
Steph Tolev
But you know what I really like there. I'm sure maybe you've read or seen this somewhere as well. But there's this perspective on adulthood that's like. Actually because the first 18 years of your life were so managed by other people. Like when you're 30, you're a 12 year old adult and when you're 40, you're a 22 year old adult. Like really thinking, like, I don't know, it helps me to think, like, like, oh, when I turn 40, I'm really just getting into like the 20s of my adulthood. Like it's actually okay.
Olivia
Yeah, cool.
Steph Tolev
Good time. Where like I can still be figuring things out and like making new opinions and decisions.
Olivia
Yeah, no, I love. I'm loving this age. Yeah, this is my mid-30s and my favorite age. 35 to 40, I'm loving.
Steph Tolev
But don't you think the 40. 40 to 50 will be the same?
Olivia
Yeah, it's probably better, but I just, I'm like, I'm older and I'm getting closer.
Steph Tolev
You're getting so uncomfortable. You're like, really? You're really in it.
Olivia
It's really. It's just really bad how, how much thought I put into it.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah. And I wake up like middle of the night and it's like, then I cry, like alone. It's weird.
Steph Tolev
I been there.
Olivia
I hate it. It's sick.
Steph Tolev
Hey, I hate it too. The question I was going to ask is not going to help us get off of it.
Olivia
Oh, God.
Steph Tolev
The question I was going to ask is I ask people a lot on this show is what do you want? Like what Is the point of all this. You're doing very well.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Special coming out soon. Can't say where.
Olivia
Can't say where.
Steph Tolev
Special coming out on a very big streamer that you all have memberships to.
Olivia
Yes, yes, thank you.
Steph Tolev
People love you. You're in tv, film.
Olivia
Well, I'm. I'm honestly, I'm very happy now. It took me, I think, a long time to realize that. I. Yeah, this is what I think. I think I was meant to be a comedian. I think I was meant to make people laugh.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I'm. I'm doing it. I'm doing exactly what I think I should be doing. And I'm happy. And I'm finally happy with a man. I think that that took over a lot of my thoughts for a long time because I was so unhappy and my. The boyfriend before him was the worst person on the planet Earth.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And then I met this man that really like that put. But like, everything just. It added a whole new layer to. I'm like, oh, I can be happy in career and in relationships. What a wild idea that is.
Steph Tolev
You just needed to find a Christian man.
Olivia
I needed another. A nice, sweet Jesus loving boy.
Steph Tolev
A good Christian boy. A good Christian boy who hates the dog. Hair in the car.
Olivia
Hates the dog. Also, the dog's not allowed in the bed when he's there. He hates the dog in the bed.
Steph Tolev
I think he's right. I'm really on his side.
Olivia
Wow. All out on his side. Wow.
Steph Tolev
Dog out of bed.
Olivia
Dog was in the bed this morning, I'll tell you that. He ain't here. Dog is snuggling in my head.
Steph Tolev
You keep doing this as if you might secretly be kissing. You're like, no, I would never kiss the dog. The dog.
Olivia
I kid. I kiss. I kiss. I kiss her nose. The top of her nose.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, yeah.
Olivia
Not her lips.
Steph Tolev
Okay.
Olivia
Her lips are gross. I see her. I don't go near those lips.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, you think?
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
You're thinking about her sometime.
Olivia
Oh, yeah. Death and her are the two things I think about the most.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Death and your dog's pussy. Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
The two constants in life.
Olivia
Two constants in life.
Steph Tolev
Death and dog.
Olivia
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Sick.
Steph Tolev
You know what? We have a fan voicemail for you.
Olivia
No, we do.
Steph Tolev
Headphones. I dare you.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
Let's see what these freaks want to know about.
Olivia
Really?
Steph Tolev
You know, my millions of podcast listeners are very interesting people. Yeah.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
You're on some list.
Olivia
You're on the list. I saw your podcast is like high up. People listen to it.
Steph Tolev
Who knows what they're into?
Olivia
Not mine. Please listen to Steph. Infection.
Steph Tolev
We're gonna get them over there. Take Caleb and esteemed guests. What is the truth about the best way to cut off and maintain no contact with like a family member? Say, for instance, that your mom, like.
Olivia
Tricked you into believing you had cancer and like forced you to get weight.
Steph Tolev
Loss surgery and then opened a bunch of credit cards in your name and ruined your credit. How should a card carrying truther handle themselves in that situation? Yeah, thanks for the advice and love ya.
Olivia
Bye.
Steph Tolev
Oh, my God.
Olivia
Also the tone of her voice in which. Acting as if that wasn't the craziest thing I've ever heard in my life. Just this light. Nice. Like, hey, guys, what's up? My mom ruined my whole life and anyways, bye.
Steph Tolev
Hey, y'all. My mom convinced me I have cancer, made me get weight loss surgery and open credit cards in my name. Thoughts?
Olivia
Yeah, thoughts. Good night. Wow.
Steph Tolev
What do you think?
Olivia
I think. I think it's easy. It's not easy to cut off a family member, but here I ate, but.
Steph Tolev
It'S gonna be easy for me. I'm done with that person. Yeah.
Olivia
I honestly, I. The best way of getting some of your life. Unfollow them on any kind of social media. It's a sick thing where it's like out of sight, out of mind.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I mean, I'm sure she's here, like family events, but that's crazy. I would not be talking to my mom if that's what she did to me.
Steph Tolev
I also think I would probably, if I were the family. Uninvite her from family events.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
You convince your kid that they have cancer, force them to get weight loss surgery, and then open credit cards in their name.
Olivia
What the hell?
Steph Tolev
It's time out from Thanksgiving, probably.
Olivia
Yeah. I think they should be getting some serious help. Maybe put them in some sort of home. That seems.
Steph Tolev
That's crazy.
Olivia
That's beyond.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Jesus.
Olivia
Your mother. Yeah, I don't know. That's also. How did you. Why didn't you get a second opinion on the cancer stuff? How would your mom convince you? Is she a doctor?
Steph Tolev
Well, she might have been young. She didn't say how young she was. Right. She could have been like a child.
Olivia
I feel like the whole family probably doesn't like her then. There's no way. People like this mom.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, there's no way she's.
Olivia
She sounds unlikable.
Steph Tolev
The credit card thing, I've heard a lot like parents opening credit cards in their kid's Name and maxing them out because they can. They have all your information and they. And it's your responsibility still.
Olivia
Huh?
Steph Tolev
It's crazy. My mom. Opposite. My mom had a bunch of credit card debt herself. And my whole childhood was like, do not ever open a credit card. I didn't get a credit card until I was 26.
Olivia
Oh, wow.
Steph Tolev
Because I was terrified of them. Because my mom was like, these will ruin your life. Do not open them. Which is not true. God love her. She was just poor in a single mom and, like, bad with credit cards. But she paid them all off and was like, don't ever open one until you have to.
Olivia
Oh, wow.
Steph Tolev
And I did have to. You opposite.
Olivia
Opposite.
Steph Tolev
Good mom.
Olivia
Now you're paying. Yeah, that is. That's my advice.
Steph Tolev
My advice to the caller. I'm like, have a good mom.
Olivia
Yeah, sorry. Have my mom. Have.
Steph Tolev
My mom would never do that. Yeah, no, but it. People do that. It's crazy. The credit card thing specifically is crazy.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
It's such a scam. Dot com.
Olivia
It's. It seems like a very American scam.
Steph Tolev
It's a scam dot org.
Olivia
I'm on these scam tick tocks right now. Are you with these people, like all these car people, like, backing into people and. Not really. If you see that one. And now I'm seeing. Right. I got scammed in. Listen up. People in la. I got scammed. I first moved here. I was in Venice beach and I parked in the spot. I had a forward escape and it was a very small spot, probably I had no backup camera. I. I looked at him. Like, I could probably wedge in there. So I tapped this car, tapped in a way, moved forward. I came out, looked at nothing. I hear this man screaming. I had two of my friends in the car. Thank God. I hear this man screaming, what the. You. You ruined my car comes out. I'm like, what? And then he's like, she saw it. There's this woman on a.
Steph Tolev
Like, she's like, what?
Olivia
What? Literally on her porch, like, what? He comes out, starts taking photos of me, my car, my license plate. His whole bumper is like, look what you did. I'm like, buddy, that was there before. It was like a full dent. I was like, no, I didn't do that. My. Also, my car is beige. It was a black denim. I didn't do that. He's like, you're done. You're done. I'm like, what? And my friend Matt was there. He goes, hey, first of all, shut the up. Stop talking like that. What the happening Long story short, I was like, I. I ended up calling my insurance company. I was like, this guy's a liar. I will go to court. I am willing to go to court. This I have. I have. Because, you know, you take a photo on your. Your phone, it shows you the time and stuff.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
So I. All these photos, nothing happened. I got a call from my insurance company like, three months later, and they go, just so you know, you. You've outed this man who's been doing this crazy insurance fraud for the last, like, five years and making thousands and thousands of dollars. He's like. Like, nobody would stand up for him because he wanted, like, three grand.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I'm like, I'll go to court. I don't. Hey, I don't have. At that time, I had. I didn't have three grand to give you. I'm like, I got nothing. I'm like, also, my car is from Canada. I have three transmissions. I don't give a. About this car. I will go to court. And I guess I was like one of the first people that was like, I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll tell you that he's a liar.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And he. He got caught and he got arrested. Oh, yeah, it was bad. He got. Oh, yeah. I was. I felt so good, dude. I had raisy.
Steph Tolev
That's nuts. I had a. I was driving a friend's car on the 101. And do you know where the exit to the Hollywood bowl starts to happen? And they're backed onto the highway. They're stopped dead. Traffic on the fucking highway on the 101 so that people can go to the Hollywood Bowl. Figure it out. Yeah, I'm pissed.
Olivia
But.
Steph Tolev
So basically what happens is the car in front of me, we're going normal speed, right?
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I'm looking. I'm just driving. I'm looking at the road. Car in front of me swerves and reveals an entire stop. Lane of traffic. So, of course, I sit on my brakes. It's not enough. I hit the guy in front of me. Not that bad. Like, the front end of my car. My friend's car is a little smashed up. He's got a little, like, indent in his. Yeah, but it was, of course, a little drawing. We're on the highway, so we pull off. What takes forever because we have to get off at the Hollywood Bowl. So it's like another 25 minutes of us just driving slowly right by each other until we can find somewhere to pull over. Yeah, we Pull over. It turns out this freak is an Uber driver with passengers. He's got three teen girls in the back that were trying to go to the Hollywood Bowl. God, everybody's fine. And I immediately. I could tell as soon as I get out of the car, the way the guy's behaving. I was like, turn on your phone and start recording. Oh. I was like. So I immediately was like, girls, are you okay? And they're like, yeah, we're all fine. And he was like, well, you might not be. Don't say that. And I wasn't holding the phone up. I had it recording audio. And I was like, no, if they say they're fine, that's. They're good. I was like, are you okay? And he was like. He was like, I don't know, man starts, like, grabbing his neck, and he was like. He was like, I'm at work right now. Like, I might need workman's comp or something. I was like, that's not how Uber works. Let's wait for the cop to get here, so.
Olivia
Oh, my God, already?
Steph Tolev
I'm done with this motherfucker. He's like, take. He's like. He's like, give me your license. Take a picture. I was like, nope, you're gonna wait right there, and we're gonna wait for the cop. Yeah, he called the cops. So I was like, if you want to call the cops, that's what we'll do.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I would have just given him, like, a thousand bucks or something. His thing wasn't gonna be a big deal.
Olivia
Yeah. Literally.
Steph Tolev
But he was like, we need to call the police. I was like, you can call the police. I'm not calling the police. I don't care. And he was like. So he did. And then he was like, give me your license. I was like, no, we'll wait for the police. That's what you wanted to do?
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
He was like, you have to give me your license. And they start. He's. He literally, no, you have to give me your license.
Olivia
That's me at Smokehouse.
Steph Tolev
Oh, the booth. He was like, this pathetic, miserable figure. Like, he was just so. I thought he was gonna get a payday out of this. I was like, you're getting nothing.
Olivia
You're getting zero now. That. Also, if you're gonna act, act a little bit better than that.
Steph Tolev
Commit car.
Olivia
You better be limping.
Steph Tolev
When you tried to get the girls in on it, I was like, girls?
Olivia
And they were like, we are going to see Taylor's Swift. Let me get the.
Steph Tolev
They were like, they were going to see Lion King. They were like, they're like, can we. I was like, I might have saved you at night, girls.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
They were like, can we go? He was like, no, you have to wait and make a statement. I was like, they can do whatever they want. I was like, you don't have to listen to him just because you were in his Uber.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And I was like, stay and make a statement if you want to. And they were like, okay, we'll wait. And I was like, cool. The cop gets there, they make a statement. And the cop was like, what happened? They're like, he back. He hit us on accident. We're fine. Can we leave? Cop was like, go.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Then the cops trying to talk to me. The guy walks over and goes, goes, you know, he hit me. And the cop goes, I know. Can you stand over there? And then I thought, I'm talking to this cop. And I was like, hey, dude. Like, this guy's talking about workman's comp and, like, holding his neck. Can you just, like, say in your report that he's standing up and fine or. Because I'm worried he's gonna do, like a. Yeah. A gurney out of here situation.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
And the cop laughed, and he was like, I deal with guys like this all the time. It's gonna be fine.
Olivia
I was like, oh, my God.
Steph Tolev
So then, yeah, it was like, the insurance handled it, and I paid whatever was left over for my friend's car. And it was like, not a big deal.
Olivia
People are.
Steph Tolev
Get a life, loser.
Olivia
What is your problem? Like, that's what you're going to try to get money off of? Get a better job, then. Yeah, sorry.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Also, I. That's, like, crazy, by the way.
Steph Tolev
I hate that it happened. It was an accident. This is what we. This is. This is a byproduct of. We're in a car culture in la. You're going to sometimes get in an accident. And also, like, it makes me mad because had I not been who I am, had I not known what to do, had I not also, I have lawyers. I'm like, I don't. You're. I'm not scared of you.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
But some, like, if it was someone else who didn't know how to handle themselves, he would have scammed them. Them.
Olivia
Like this guy that scared all these people.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
So it wasn't me screaming. I'm like, that's. It is sad.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
There's a picture of people paid him before that.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And he just purposely Parks there and watches. Sick.
Steph Tolev
Really scary. It's freaky scary stuff. I'm gonna start trying it as well, though.
Olivia
Yeah. Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I'm backing into people on the highway.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I get out.
Olivia
Ah. What the fake.
Steph Tolev
Chance has a dash cam. He's a big dash cam proponent. Always has been.
Olivia
Really?
Steph Tolev
He's a dash cam guy.
Olivia
Okay. Okay. Yeah, I think I should get one.
Steph Tolev
That's a level of paranoia that Chance lives.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And it's not unsmart, but it is. That's where. That's how he lives.
Olivia
Okay. Yeah, yeah, Yeah, I might get one.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. I honestly, that video that you're. The specific one you're talking about might have been like, a plant from a dash cam company. Because everyone I've seen talking about online is like, I'm getting a dash cam.
Olivia
Oh, yeah, actually, that. That would have been very good.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, that would have been smart.
Olivia
Great advertising.
Steph Tolev
That is really good advertising. Your guy might have worked with him as well.
Olivia
He might have.
Steph Tolev
In some. In some roundabout way. There might be a whole ring. There might be a whole ring of.
Olivia
Dash cam proponents in Venice Beach. There could be.
Steph Tolev
Steph, what is so true to you?
Olivia
So true to me? Yeah.
Steph Tolev
What's something so true to you? What's a hill? You're willing to die on a hill?
Olivia
Oh, hell, I'm willing to die on strong take.
Steph Tolev
You got any strong takes? You don't seem to.
Olivia
I don't really have strong taste, so.
Steph Tolev
You'Re kind of a demure.
Olivia
I don't. I mean, I got takes, but they're not like, what's something that's so true to me that I stand by? I don't know. I guess being your, like, true. I think as a comedian, being as true as you can be to yourself. Yeah, I'm really. I'm really on this bandwagon right now where I'm, like, really finding comedians so much funnier who are, like, just truthful and being themselves than seeing somebody who you talk to off stage. And it gets on. They do some, like, bit. You're like, that's not who you are. I just fucking talked to you. You're a fucking slug. And now you're acting like you're this fucking person.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
What the hell? I agree that. I think that it's just. It's making. It's also, like, watching it. It's just so much. You're very truthful on stage, I mean.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah. It's nice to see a comic, actually. You know, Talk about real and be real.
Steph Tolev
There's a lot Of. I don't know if you've noticed this, but a lot of the, like, Internet following comics, which we both have Internet followings, but, like, a lot of people who came from that and didn't start at least on some level, like, do wing stand up eating for five people in the basement. Like, the people who didn't start that way, they have this really large drop off between who they are on stage and online and who they are in real life. And I've talked about this a lot, but you meet some of these people, they're online being like, I'll overthrow the government. I don't care. And then in person, they're like, hey, I'm Michelle. You know, I'm like, what happened?
Olivia
Like, what is this? Yeah.
Steph Tolev
What is this church mouse routine? In person you were like this roaring lion on the Internet.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Or on stage, where I'm like, what is this doing for you?
Olivia
I don't. I think I. I honestly do think the Internet's kind of ruined comedy in a way.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
The vocal half. I don't know. Not that. Just all these, like, you know, the whole Kill Tony crew, all these, like, comics who've been doing it for, like, five years, who now are like, have these huge followings as if they've been doing it for 30 years. It's like, what's. You're getting quiet. Are you a big.
Steph Tolev
Well, Tony's a dear friend. Yeah. I just think he's smart.
Olivia
I got no issues with Tony. It's. It's because people keep asking me my TikTok lives why I don't go on the show. And I'm like, because I've been doing comedy for 22 fucking years. And it took me 22 fucking years to get where I am. It didn't take me one Internet appearance where I didn't have material to go. I know some of those guys do.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Have the fucking. I have an hour. But it's like, you know, last weekend I was in Portland. I'm not gonna say the comic's name, but there's an Internet guy who went viral and he was there. And I was like. I was like, oh, sorry, I'm not getting a drink. I'm usually fun. And they're like, no, you know, we, like, we love a sober comedian. And this guy who's like, literally been doing comedy for four years is huge right now. Went to the club, treated everyone like absolute dog.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Was not funny. His fans were dying, no material. He ruined half the. He ruined all their mics. He ruined all the stools.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I was like. And this guy's like, selling all these tickets and making like, way more money than I am. And I'm like, I need to calm down.
Steph Tolev
Over.
Olivia
But I'm like that. I'm like, it can't last forever. This Internet craze can't last forever, can it? At some point, are we gonna be like, oh, they don't have 20 minutes. Like, what is that gonna.
Steph Tolev
Specifically with stand ups, you're saying?
Olivia
I'm saying specifically with stand ups, it's.
Steph Tolev
The crowd work versus the actual material.
Olivia
Yes. It's the actual, like the time put in. It's the time put in.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I, I'm still a firm believer of you need to have at least fucking 10 years under your fucking belt. Am I so old school? Is that what it is?
Steph Tolev
A little. But I don't think I entirely disagree.
Olivia
Like, there's, I'm not going to trust watching someone do an hour that hasn't literally done exactly what you said, driven four hours to some butt nowhere bar turn, an entire crowd of people not listening and smoking and turning and you killing that room. You didn't get to do that. You didn't learn how to do this properly.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
You went online, you got all these followers, you did one appearance and you blew up from that. It's like, well, where was the practice? I am a firm believer that stand up gets better. And like, how do you even know who you are? I didn't know who I wasn't. Aged for like seven years.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I'm, I, I think they're also. There is a pathway. Like, I am. I do think, like, when, when I first blew up on the Internet, I was still very new to doing comedy. I was like four years in, maybe, maybe, maybe three years professionally. Four years. Like, if you count that little time in college where I was just around and then started really taking it seriously. And then I sucked. I was bad. I was getting. I was selling out audiences, 100 seat rooms. I mean, it's not like I was selling out theaters or something. Mine was a much more gradual, slow burn thing. But I started selling out audiences before I was really ready and my work sucked. We just talked about this with Niles that, like, you know, I was doing, I was doing kind of bad shows and I recognized it and took the time and, like, got better and, like, really put in more of the work. I'd already done the, like, basement attic in Chicago, but I do think there at least has to be some respect for the art form and Some acknowledgment of whether or not your work is actually good.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Be honest with yourself because a lot of these people are bad and they know it and they're just. They're just too scared to say it. I'm like, there's nothing wrong with being bad. You can get better.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Admit that you're bad.
Olivia
Yep.
Steph Tolev
Put in the work and you actually could improve.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
But these people suck. And they. But I just don't think a lot of those right wing, like, not even necessarily right wing, but that, like Kill Tony, like, ironic up guy crew. So many of them are not good.
Olivia
No, they're not good stand up. No, they're.
Steph Tolev
Some of them are.
Olivia
Some of them are.
Steph Tolev
I will say Shane's a great stand up, I think.
Olivia
Oh, Shane's hilarious. But I don't even think that you.
Steph Tolev
Don'T think he's in that crew. It's like the only thing.
Olivia
No, but he doesn't do like. No, no, he doesn't do like. He didn't get big because of that show.
Steph Tolev
Right. But he's there every week doing some stupid little trump bit with them.
Olivia
Well, he lives there, I guess. Yeah. But I mean, Cam, there's a guy, Cam Patterson on there who I actually find very fun. Cam's hilarious. Cam's actually one of the few. I'm like, that guy's funny. Puts in the time.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Like, I met him before he was even in that crew. And he's like, he knew who I was. He's like, he was so nice. And I will say Uncle Laser, if you know Uncle Laser is. He's literally me with a blonde mullet. He's like, dad, dude. He sounds like a crazy person. He has a huge Internet following and he always talks to me. He's like trying so hard. He's doing mics, he's fucking working his ass off. He's like, I know my stand up's not good. I know I have an audience. I'm trying to get there. And I'm like, that's. That's what I want to see.
Steph Tolev
Respectable people.
Olivia
Respectable. Also being honest. Same thing, what I just said. Being true to Jeff, being true to who you are and true to your fucking voice on stage, which you can't get your own fucking voice unless you put the fucking time in.
Steph Tolev
And I think you sound so old.
Olivia
I sound so old. I am.
Steph Tolev
And I, in my association, I'm taking it on. I'm feeling old as well.
Olivia
And it's also, there's for sure a form of jealousy for sure. These Kiltonian guys are selling way more tickets than I am. So it's fucking frustrating as hell that I'm, like, going on TikTok live and I'm going, go see me Vancouver like a fucking idiot. It's pathetic. So there's definitely, Definitely a form of jealousy in there. But I'm also, like, I honestly do believe that if I got that kind of popularity at, like, what, five years in, I would not be doing as well as I am now.
Steph Tolev
There's not a job. There's genuinely not a jealousy tinge in it for me, only because I don't want what they have I don't care about. So I. I like selling out the little shows I do. I like my. I like exactly where I am. I don't desire to play theaters. I don't need to. I don't need to play bigger venues. I don't want what they have. So for me, it is. I'm purely a hater for the love of the game. That is true about me.
Olivia
Oh, no, I'm definitely.
Steph Tolev
I'm definitely a bit jealous working right now.
Olivia
Well, Krystalia.
Steph Tolev
Well, okay.
Olivia
I mean. I mean, don't even. I mean. Yeah. Excuse me. Who's your favorite, favorite comedian working right now?
Steph Tolev
Who's your favorite comedian working right now? You can't say me. I know, Steph, you're gonna try.
Olivia
I might say Bill. Bill Burr.
Steph Tolev
He's just. God, he's good.
Olivia
He's the issue. Watching Bill every fucking night, like, have new jokes. I'm like, when did you have the time to write a good joke? Yeah, I like, just record my hour. I'm like. I'm on stage going, my hemorrhoids back. Like, I have nothing to say. Yeah. I have no material now. I have nothing. And I'm like, he just films hours and hours and hours and then has, like, a new hour. Pristine.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
It's insane.
Steph Tolev
He's genuinely fearless, too. I have a lot of. I have. I've never met the guy. I have a ton of respect for him. I watched all of his specials growing up. I think he's a genius, and I do. I respect that. He'll go into pretty much any space and someone.
Olivia
Oh, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Someone famous and powerful sitting across from him that's having him on will say something stupid. He'll go, shut up.
Olivia
Oh, he's a rock. He's so rock. He's so genuine. He's so nice, and he's so kind.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And he, like. He pops into spots in the belly room. Like, he does, like, doesn't give a. He does smaller shows. He's not like.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
He calls in his avails at the store. Like, he's a nice, normal man still. He behaves as if he's not as big as he is, which is so crazy.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. No, I, I have a lot of respect for him. You've. You've done a lot with him.
Olivia
Yes. He's the reason my career took off.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah. He's. Thank God. Thank you, Bill.
Steph Tolev
Thank you, Bill. Thank you, Bill. No, I have a lot of respect for him. He's really great. And I, I do. I never feel that. Even if he says something that I might disagree with in, in a, in a, in a routine or in a bit, it. I, I always feel that it's coming from a place of, like, genuine curiosity and questioning and never from a place of, like, trying to be hurtful.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And that I can always respect and appreciate that.
Olivia
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Steph Tolev
Bill Burr. I say, Bill, he's your favorite. Who's your favorite that people might not know?
Olivia
People know Naomi Ek Perrigan.
Steph Tolev
I love Naomi.
Olivia
I love Naomi.
Steph Tolev
That's a killer.
Olivia
And she killed also. She has such a different cadence.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Than anybody else I've ever seen. And she's so silly and she's so nice. I mean, I hate that she refuses to do my podcast in person because I've asked her 5,000 times because she won't leave her house.
Steph Tolev
The CO.
Olivia
But it's the CO stuff.
Steph Tolev
It's the reason she hasn't been on this show. I haven't asked. Cuz I'm like, I know you don't like going out.
Olivia
Oh, no, you can't. She will not do it. If she does yours, I'll snap. I'll come sit right here, breathe in her mouth the whole time.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Now I'm going to try extra hard to get her and we're going to talk about why won't you go do stuff. You'll do mine. What's up?
Olivia
Yeah. What the hell? I love, I love her. She's like, she's a true original.
Steph Tolev
She's a genuinely authentic, which, like you.
Olivia
Said, is becoming more and more rare and does. When she does her own stories, I think comics. I watch her stories because when she does, like, she actually talks to the front face camera. That's how she is. Yeah, that's how she talks. She talks on stages. That's how she is all the time.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Nice.
Steph Tolev
She's a killer. I had so much fun. I went to a party at Kumail and Emily's house recently.
Olivia
Right?
Steph Tolev
Like, yeah. Huge brag. I love you both, but I'm like, yeah, I don't. I don't. I'm like. Well, as a. As a party goer at Camille and Emily's, but I didn't know who I was gonna know there. I was just like, kind of swung through. Because I love both of them. Two of the sweetest people in the world, by the way. Naomi was there with Andy.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
Naomi was there.
Olivia
Great couple.
Steph Tolev
Great couple of them. He's so sweet, too.
Olivia
He's so sweet. So supportive.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. You and Olivia have worked together for a long time.
Olivia
Long time.
Steph Tolev
Our shared manager.
Olivia
Our shared manager, Olivia. She's the best. I've worked with her for years. Yeah.
Steph Tolev
For her.
Olivia
I honestly would dive her if you saw what she did for my special. It was unbelievable.
Steph Tolev
What'd she do?
Olivia
She. She was a seamstress. My. My outfits are falling apart. Before I'm on stage. Stage. She gets out a needle and thread. She's stitching on my back on. She literally got everyone made little badges, like, little lanyards for me. She designed all that. She set up my whole. I made it look like a rock concert.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
She set up all of my merch on this, like, area. Every. She literally was a costume designer, set designer, like, producer. She got everyone. She picked all the people to come in and sit front row. She found all the people. It was insane. She got tattoos for me. They got, like, these fake tattoos made. It was insane. She, like, organized the after party. Everything that happened was her. And I was like, I can't. I just sent her, actually, a little present. She's getting it tomorrow. Because I was like, I need to give her something nice.
Steph Tolev
She's amazing.
Olivia
She's insane. What she did for me, it's crazy.
Steph Tolev
She loves you. Like, she adores you. Of course, you're like a client she's had for a very long time. But she taught. She talks so negatively about you. I don't get it. I'm like, I know that you love stuff. Why are you talking so much shit on her?
Olivia
She gave me. She printed out. I started bawling my eyes out. Actually, right before the special, she printed out a frame of my set list, and she drew all the little jokes. She's a crazy artist. Yeah, she drew all the little jokes, like, fully all around this frame. And I was just like.
Steph Tolev
And just heard she's gonna dream of four stage.
Olivia
Yes, Olivia, I know. And then my sister gave me a fucking photo of the baby. I'M obsessed with. In a little jumpsuit and a mullet.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I was like, she dressed the baby like me and with my little logo in the back. And I was like. And both of them are saying that because they're also friends too.
Steph Tolev
Not before the show.
Olivia
Before the show.
Steph Tolev
That's crazy.
Olivia
My sister came to the wedding. Actually, my sister and. And my parents were invited to Olivia's wedding. That's how close we are. Well, because she's also marrying my best friend.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Who I love.
Olivia
Alex is the best. Alex is also hilarious. Alex is one of the funniest comics out there that doesn't get any funny. He's so funny.
Steph Tolev
I had one of my favorite nights with. I don't remember what all happened this night, but I think maybe we were at the Bowery or something. But it was Olivia and Alex. A bunch of us were together. And then I was like, I want to go dancing. And Olivia and Alex were the only two that were like. Yes. And maybe someone. Maybe someone else joined us. But Olivia and Alex. We tore up a dance floor at some shitty little basement bar in New york until like 4 in the morning. It was the first time I think I had met him. And I literally just the next day I called Olivia and I was like, I hope you spend the rest of your life with this guy.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Because they. They. You see them together and you're just like. I could cry talking about it. They're so beautiful, so cute, and they're so fun.
Olivia
He loves her so much. It's very sweet because I've known. I've known him for 15, 16 years.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And she. They just. You see them interacting in like a normal low stakes moment and you're like, God damn.
Olivia
Yeah. No, they're. They don't fight. They're very sweet. He. I took him, actually. You know Joe Dabrowski? I took him. You like Jonah Broski?
Steph Tolev
Wait, I said yes immediately and then realized.
Olivia
I think I said it because he's a gay comic. I assumed you knew who he was. Joe Domrowski. Is that rude? I was so funny.
Steph Tolev
I was hearing something else. I don't know if I actually know who this.
Olivia
Okay. He's. He's hilarious.
Steph Tolev
Oh, wait, I know why I know the name is because he's done shows with Amy Miller.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
I think she's maybe open for him or something.
Olivia
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Steph Tolev
I know of this guy. We don't know each other personally.
Olivia
Okay. He's hilarious. Have him on here. He's the best. We went and party with him in Tampa. And he took us to this gay bar. And I. I bring Pavi. I don't say what he is. I don't. It doesn't matter. Straight or gay, whatever. So we come in. I can't find Pav. I'm like, where the is. We go to the dance floor. He's in the middle, just cut and rug just hands in the air, screaming. And he goes, oh, I didn't know your opener was gay. I go, that's the straightest man I know right there. Just cotton rock.
Steph Tolev
He's not gay. He's just a good time.
Olivia
He's the best.
Steph Tolev
He's just a good time.
Olivia
Yeah. The next day he's like, are we going to dance it again? Like, he was, like, so into it.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
It was so cute.
Steph Tolev
That rocks.
Olivia
I know.
Steph Tolev
It would be. Yeah. I think it'd be a lot better experience on Earth if more people were just like that.
Olivia
A nice boy.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, nice boy who just wants to dance and. Very funny.
Olivia
Yeah, very funny.
Steph Tolev
Shouts out. Shout out to Alex. V, O, N, E. I thought you said spavone. And I was like, I don't think that's true.
Olivia
Spavoni.
Steph Tolev
Baloney, baloney. I have a segment for you. Stuff. Stuff.
Olivia
Oh, great. How are you going to die and explain it verbatim?
Steph Tolev
Well, maybe. Oh, there's some stuff in here I didn't even get to that I want to. But maybe we'll. Maybe we'll get to it. Maybe we'll get to it on the Patreon. Maybe. You know what? How about this? How about this? But a lot of listens every. A lot of listens every week coming in the regular sphere. Let's get some more of you over to Patreon.
Olivia
Yeah. What the hell?
Steph Tolev
Because you understand, I've got bills to pay. And when you listen on audio, you listen on audio. You go over and do the YouTube as well, y'all. I work hard on this show. There's a lot of people who work hard on this show. Get to the Patreon.
Olivia
I put eyeshadow on. Get to the goddamn eyeshadow.
Steph Tolev
And one of her best short rompers.
Olivia
Yeah, it's hot out there.
Steph Tolev
It's hot out there, y'all. Gym shorts. I look horrible. Yeah. I don't take the show that seriously, but get to the Patreon. We do content on there. We do a bonus episode every month. Just with me.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
You understand?
Olivia
I understand. Go over there. It's annoying, forcing people.
Steph Tolev
So show's doing very well, but would like to get More of you to Patreon. Y'all already know what freaking time it is. Okay, it's time for the Twisted Tea True or False segment, brought to you by Twisted T. Twisted T called me up and they said, caleb, we love what you're doing. You're changing everything. You're one of the. You're one of the biggest and best guys doing it right now. Out. Can we please, please, can we sponsor the True False segment? And I said, you know what? Yes, y'all can. Because this beverage, y'all, this beverage. Oh, my goodness. I'm. I'm drinking. I'm drinking Twisted Tea first thing when I wake up. Can't wait to get my lips on one. Okay? Drinking at the football game. I'm drinking it everywhere I go. This is big stuff that we're working with these guys. Okay, Twisted T. Twisted T. True False segment. Let's get into it. Chance, kick it over to the. Kick it over. Steph, this is a True or False segment, okay? I'm gonna read you 15 statements. You're gonna tell me as quickly as you can. Speed is of the essence, okay? Whether you think it's true or false, Steph, you get 10 or more correct, we're gonna give you 50 US dollars.
Olivia
What? Oh, I'm so bad at these things.
Steph Tolev
Well, you better get good. Love Is Blind. US has run for seven seasons.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
True. Madonna owns a grain silo company in Michigan.
Olivia
True. False. False.
Steph Tolev
Toothpaste was originally invented as an engine lubricant.
Olivia
False.
Steph Tolev
False. Cats have four toes on their hind paws.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
True. There's water on the surface of one of Jupiter's moons.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
A. True. It's Europa. Will Ferrell and Rush Limbaugh are cousins.
Olivia
False.
Steph Tolev
False. Humber College's mascot's name is Harold the Hawk.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
False. Howie the Hawk. I know. Gmail is older than JoJo Siwa.
Olivia
Sorry?
Steph Tolev
Gmail is older than JoJo Siwa.
Olivia
Yes. False.
Steph Tolev
False. 9 times 6 is 54.
Olivia
False.
Steph Tolev
True. Sherlock Holmes was a real person.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
False.
Olivia
What?
Steph Tolev
Toronto. CN Tower was the tallest freestanding structure in the world until 2007.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
True. Geckos can turn the stickiness of their feet on and off at will.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
True. Kids in the hall had seven original members.
Olivia
False.
Steph Tolev
False. It's always been five Bagpipes were invented in Egypt.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
That's true. Marie Curie is the only person to win Nobel Prizes in two different scientific fields.
Olivia
True.
Steph Tolev
True. How'd she do?
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And can I say, I was gonna give you the money regardless, because you might be the first guest we've ever had who answered the questions quickly. Quickly. Everyone gets contemplative and slow with it, which is cute sometimes, but you.
Olivia
I only really knew a few of them, to be honest. I was guessing.
Steph Tolev
But you committed.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
And that's.
Olivia
The tower was the only one I actually knew because I did a project on that in high school.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, you're a big Toronto gal. That was the Twisted T. True False segment brought to you by Twisted T. Okay, grab a refreshing Twisted tea today. And you guys, I cannot stress this enough. This comes from the bottom of my heart. I want to see everybody who's able doing what I'm about to say next. Just keep it twisted. Come on. What's it gonna hurt to keep it twisted?
Olivia
I'm born and raised. I love Toronto.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I love Toronto.
Olivia
You love Toronto.
Steph Tolev
I was just there.
Olivia
What the heck?
Steph Tolev
Three weeks ago, I was in Toronto.
Olivia
What'd you do again?
Steph Tolev
I was filming a TV show.
Olivia
Oh, wow. Excuse me.
Steph Tolev
Little bit. A little bit. A little bit. Part kind of becoming my favorite thing.
Olivia
I. I just did a part pop in. I can't say what, but it was.
Steph Tolev
Tell me after.
Olivia
Yeah, it was. I'm loving the pop in.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, the pop in is fun. I have quickly become, like, sure, maybe I'd like a show where I'm like, number one on the call, shares. Maybe I'd like my show someday. And I have, like, ideas for it that we've. Like that we're working on. But really popping in for two, three episodes, being really funny, working for like three hours a day, everyone else there before you staying after stress, crying, sobbing, breaking out in hives.
Olivia
I have no problem. I literally love being the guest role I've been doing. I. I get very few, but I love doing, like, somebody will hire me to do, like, a voiceover.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
And I come in. It was so funny. The last one I did, they're like, okay, so you're playing. It was like some sort of, like, witch woman. And I'm like, obviously, yeah, yeah. And they go, okay, well, do you want to see, like, you were a princess and you turned into. Do you want to see your character looks like? I'm like, I'm good. Well, we'll show you. I'm like. And then they show me this absolute goblin. And I was like, I knew I look like that.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I didn't think I look like Cinderella here. I knew I was a ghoul. You had to show me, like, okay. I'm like, it wouldn't change. The voice.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, the voice. I was going to do it regardless.
Olivia
This is it.
Steph Tolev
I knew what you wanted when you brought me here.
Olivia
Yeah. This is the voice. Ghoul.
Steph Tolev
Dude. Voice Acting stuff has been cool lately for me because I'll be in Kansas City at my house, and I'll just get an email. I think I've, like, twice now. They've just been like, hey, do you want to do this? And I'm like, yeah, I'm not going to fly to LA for that, though. And they go, oh, they'll set you up at a booth in Kansas City. I just go to a recording studio in Kansas City, do the voices and leave and I get paid. Incredible.
Olivia
It's insane.
Steph Tolev
That's a gig.
Olivia
20 minutes if, like, I'm in and out.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Like a fiddler's elo.
Steph Tolev
Love. Like a fiddler. Elbow.
Olivia
It's so easy.
Steph Tolev
I love it.
Olivia
Yeah. I want to do more.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. The guest star role. Pop in, Kill, leave. I love.
Olivia
I want to. I'm writing a movie idea right now, and everyone's like, what. What is sitcom?
Steph Tolev
I.
Olivia
It's so long.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
One movie. I'm in a mount.
Steph Tolev
You're a road dog.
Olivia
I'm in and out.
Steph Tolev
You want to be on that road.
Olivia
I don't want to be on.
Steph Tolev
You don't want to be.
Olivia
Get me off the road.
Steph Tolev
I. I want a role in your movie, and I'm not kidding around.
Olivia
Oh, you'll get one. Don't play 100. Oh, yeah, you're gonna.
Steph Tolev
You're doing that. You're like, oh, you'll get one.
Olivia
No, I actually. The second you said TV role, I actually started going through my. Why. The characters that I could have you play.
Steph Tolev
I want one.
Olivia
Oh, I'll give you one.
Steph Tolev
And I don't want this polite little Hollywood thing where you're like, oh, there's one for you.
Olivia
No, no, no.
Steph Tolev
I want to roll.
Olivia
The main reason I want to write my own movies because I'm like, I want to be. This is. This is a goal. I want to be, like, the female Adam Sandler.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I want to cast all these. Have these, like, roles where I only cast my friends.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I'm not. I'm not doing a comedy with no comedians.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
I hate to break it to you. It's a comedy. Every person on that fucking thing is gonna be comedian.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
That's what's working.
Steph Tolev
I want in Naomi.
Olivia
I wrote Naomi already into it.
Steph Tolev
God damn it.
Olivia
I know before me.
Steph Tolev
Me.
Olivia
Yep.
Steph Tolev
Wow.
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Wow. Sweet girl.
Olivia
Think of who you could be right now.
Steph Tolev
Sweet girl. But I. I don't know. I'm actually.
Olivia
You know what?
Steph Tolev
Come on.
Olivia
I think I have an idea. Okay. No, I'll say after, but I think I might. There might be a role for you.
Steph Tolev
Let's get a Libya on the phone.
Olivia
Okay. Let's get her on the horn.
Steph Tolev
Let's negotiate.
Olivia
She loves you. She loves you, too.
Steph Tolev
She. I would hope. My God.
Olivia
Oh, my God.
Steph Tolev
Do you know, I just. I just was thinking the other day, this November, which. Your episode will probably come out out sometime in November. I would think this November will be five years that I've worked with Hova. Olivia.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
My managers.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. They like cold DM me on Twitter and I ignored them because I thought they were fake. I was like, these. Yeah, nice try. Scammers, you know, And I ignored them, and then they got a hold of me through, like, I had, like, local Chicago agents at the time. They got a hold of me through, like, my local agents, and.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
We started working together. But I really thought they were scammers.
Olivia
That's so.
Steph Tolev
Because I. You know, all those management companies, they have websites on their email, and then you click the website and it shows nothing.
Olivia
Yeah. There's no. You're like, what clients? You have none.
Steph Tolev
There's no listing, no sense. You have to, like, Google their name and look at different people's websites.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Like, who's. Yeah, it's insane.
Olivia
Crazy.
Steph Tolev
And so they all look like scammers. And I was like, these gals are trying to scam me. And then. Yeah.
Olivia
And then you're like.
Steph Tolev
Turned out to be. Yeah.
Olivia
I think I was one of Olivia's first clients. I think it was like, maybe five.
Steph Tolev
Or six, because you. It's been a long time for y'all.
Olivia
How long do you guys work together at least? I've been in LA for 10 years. Nine years, I think.
Steph Tolev
Crazy.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
Fans are loving this, by the way.
Olivia
Yeah. They're like.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. Tell us about your manager. We don't know.
Olivia
Yeah, she's the best. We both wouldn't be doing this well if it wasn't for her.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, well, I would be.
Olivia
I mean, I wouldn't be Olivia and Tova.
Steph Tolev
No, I'm kidding. I love them. They have been. They've been very good for me. And they really. I don't know what your conversations were like when you first got reps, but mine were explicitly like, I know what I want. I want to break out of this life. Like, I. I am a comedian. I want to break out of this Internet thing. I do not want to be doing brand deals for the rest of my life. I'm willing to not make money for a couple years if it means that we're waiting out what I actually want. And they have been so good about, like, understanding every step of the way that, like, I want a very specific thing, you know?
Olivia
Smug pig. You started in such a different way than I did. I was like, I got nothing.
Steph Tolev
I'll do.
Olivia
I'm working three jobs. My green card didn't come through yet. I legally can't work here.
Steph Tolev
Don't bring up the green card to get immigrant points. When you're white from Canada, don't get immigrant points. How much?
Olivia
$20,000.
Steph Tolev
Well, we, if you want to be here, pay ya.
Olivia
I did, and here I am.
Steph Tolev
I don't want to hear an immigrant story about a white girl from Canada.
Olivia
Well, my grandparents were an arranged marriage from Bulgaria, so does that make me.
Steph Tolev
No, they're just, that's different. White. I don't want to hear, like, a Canadian immigrant story.
Olivia
It's very hard to get a green card as a performer. It's a nightmare.
Steph Tolev
It is.
Olivia
I'm making Jefferson fucking marry me so I don't have to apply and get my citizenship because I, I can't vote right now.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, yeah. You're missing out.
Olivia
I'm missing out on, you're missing out.
Steph Tolev
On the fun of the electoral politics in the United States.
Olivia
God.
Steph Tolev
Who do you want to win?
Olivia
Obviously not Trump. Do I not give that vibe?
Steph Tolev
Hard to tell with you.
Olivia
Wow.
Steph Tolev
It's very clear.
Olivia
I know. I was like, I made one Trump joke the other day in Houston, and I think I might post the clip because, because I've never lost a crowd so quickly. It was, I went from applause to silence. I was like, oh, for sake.
Steph Tolev
That's hilarious.
Olivia
They never talk about politics on stage.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, I, I actually don't. I mean, I do. I, I, I think I assume your politics because I like you and you're a cool person, but I, I guess I wouldn't know really how far left you are or really where you are in comparison to.
Olivia
I also just, I hate Trump and I don't know. I, I think he's going to win, which is terrifying, but I'm like, I.
Steph Tolev
You just lost this room as well.
Olivia
I lost big Trumpers in here.
Steph Tolev
Everyone was like, oh, yeah, you vote for Trump.
Olivia
Okay.
Steph Tolev
No one, no one here voted. No.
Olivia
I was like, there's no way.
Steph Tolev
No chance. Yeah, I talk about politics all the time.
Olivia
I, I, I don't know much about them because I'M like, stupid. But I also am just like, I know he's bad.
Steph Tolev
You're not stupid.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
You're not stupid.
Olivia
You know, I know enough.
Steph Tolev
You know what's going on.
Olivia
He's bad.
Steph Tolev
We don't like him.
Olivia
We don't like.
Steph Tolev
That's for sure.
Olivia
That's for sure.
Steph Tolev
Yeah. We can definitely get.
Olivia
I feel like your fans are going to be like that.
Steph Tolev
You think they. What? They don't?
Olivia
No. I assume your fans are also not voting for fucking Trump.
Steph Tolev
They're not. But you know what's funny is I do have, like a weird cohort of like, Republican guy fans.
Olivia
Really?
Steph Tolev
I don't know what, like, sadomasochistic ritual they're going through. I'm only mean to that I don't respect you. I want you to know I don't like you. I have no respect for you. I. I sometimes will get a DM from like a very conservative red state guy after all posts like, you know, we should pass abortion rights. And they'll be like, man, loved your shit until this. And I'm like, what shit?
Olivia
Yeah, what did you love? Yeah, what did you.
Steph Tolev
What did you laugh?
Olivia
You were looking at my stuff.
Steph Tolev
I've only ever said I fundamentally disrespect you and people like you.
Olivia
Yeah.
Steph Tolev
I do not like the way you think about the world.
Olivia
I don't think people.
Steph Tolev
And they're like, this guy's hilarious. I'm like, I don't think some fans.
Olivia
Even know or follow along at all. On your regular post. Someone posted the day. Wow. Really? Another dirty joke. You're following me. And simply, yes. If you want clean content, you are simply on the wrong page. I've never once done anything clean.
Steph Tolev
Yeah.
Olivia
Bizarre to think I'll start now.
Steph Tolev
You should stop marketing yourself as the female Gaffigan, though.
Olivia
That I will say, stop putting on all your stuff. Yeah, me and Brazzi.
Steph Tolev
It's confusing people.
Olivia
It is confusing family friendly comedy.
Steph Tolev
You know, I was just talking about Nate Barotzi last night. I love him. I think he's great. I. I was just talking last night about. With some friends. I was like, nobody dislikes Nate Barotzi.
Olivia
No, he's. He's great. Everyone loves him. Every single, very well openers. More than any other comic.
Steph Tolev
Wow. He. No. What's he paying?
Olivia
I think like 200,000. $200 macaroos. As much as you get paid if you get all the questions.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, baby. That. That's nice to hear. He. Everybody loves him.
Olivia
Everyone loves him.
Steph Tolev
Nobody's got bad words. To say about the guy. Yeah, he's killing.
Olivia
He's killing.
Steph Tolev
Anyway, I love you. I'm glad you could make it on the show.
Olivia
Thanks for having me.
Steph Tolev
Thanks for being here. It's a real treat to have you. I love you. I think the world of you.
Olivia
I think the world of you.
Steph Tolev
So glad we got to have you. Do you want to tell people where they can find you?
Olivia
Yes.
Steph Tolev
Stuff Infection.
Olivia
And yes, you did my. My podcast, Stuff Infection. It's all about body stuff. Please listen to that and my. My Instagram at Steph Tolev. That's. That's it. And come see me live. If you come see me live.
Steph Tolev
That's it. What's it gonna hurt?
Olivia
Yeah, just go See you live.
Steph Tolev
Yeah, your thing rocks. Live.
Olivia
It's a lot.
Steph Tolev
You're. You're big and you're loud, and you're. You're tearing that stage apart. It's nice. Well, we did stuff that was a Headgum podcast.
Olivia
Hey. Hey.
Steph Tolev
I'm Lamorn Morris. And I'm Kyle Chevron. And we are here interrupting your workout to tell you about the lemorning after podcast, now on Headgum. That's right. Every Wednesday, a new episode drops, and we wait. Lamorn, what are you doing over there?
Olivia
It's nothing. Just.
Steph Tolev
It's polishing Miami. Why? Well, because we're now the only official Headgun podcast hosted by an Emmy winner. Is that true? Probably not, but Jake Johnson's on Headgun. Does he have an Emmy? No, but. But he has been a guest on the Morning after, which might be an even bigger honor. I mean, and we have other amazing guests like Glen Powell, Raven Simone, the cast of New Girl, and many, many more. Plus, we play games. We tell stories. We poll the fans for questions. We pull them for questions. Just pulling them constantly up and down, sideways, backwards. It's a lot less weird than it sounds. You'll see. Subscribe to the Morning after on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Casts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And watch video episodes on YouTube. New episodes drop every Wednesday.
Podcast Summary: "Steph Tolev Loves Her Dog"
So True with Caleb Hearon is a weekly podcast hosted by beloved gay comedian Caleb Hearon, produced by Headgum. In the December 19, 2024 episode titled "Steph Tolev Loves Her Dog," hosts Steph Tolev and Olivia delve into their personal lives, comedic careers, relationships, and the challenges they face balancing fame, anxiety, and authenticity.
Dog Dynamics: The episode opens with a humorous discussion about Olivia's dog and her partner's disdain for the pet being on the bed. Steph supports her partner's stance, leading to playful banter about dog interactions.
They share anecdotes about their dog's antics, emphasizing the blend of humor and frustration that pets can bring into a relationship.
Moving the Car and Shared Responsibilities: Olivia speaks about her role as the designated car mover due to street cleaning schedules in East Hollywood. This responsibility has become a point of contention, highlighting the invisible labor often shouldered by one partner.
The conversation underscores common relationship tensions and the importance of communication and understanding in shared responsibilities.
Childhood Fears: Both hosts open up about their deep-seated fears of death, rooted in childhood experiences. Olivia recounts how her grandmother's unfulfilled prayers led her to question her belief in God.
They discuss how these fears persist into adulthood, affecting their mental health and daily lives.
Coping Mechanisms: Steph shares her approach to managing fear through constant exposure and reading about death, likening it to exposure therapy.
Olivia admits struggling with spirals of anxiety, especially when faced with new family additions like her sister's baby.
Balancing Fame and Authenticity: Steph and Olivia discuss the impact of internet fame on their comedic careers. They express concerns about comedians who gain rapid online followings without the foundational years of honing their craft.
They emphasize the importance of authenticity and continuous improvement in stand-up comedy, contrasting their experiences with those who achieve quick fame online.
Respect for Fellow Comedians: The hosts praise established comedians like Bill Burr and Naomi Ek Perrigan for their dedication and authenticity, highlighting the qualities they admire in their peers.
Handling Scams and Accidents: Olivia shares a personal story about being falsely accused of damaging a car, showcasing her resilience and willingness to stand up against fraudulent claims.
Steph recounts a similar experience involving an Uber driver, illustrating the everyday challenges faced in traffic-heavy environments like Los Angeles.
Fun with Friends: Both hosts reminisce about fun times with friends and fellow comedians, such as dancing at parties and supporting each other’s careers.
Beliefs and God: The hosts engage in a candid conversation about their beliefs regarding God, with Olivia identifying as an atheist due to unfulfilled childhood prayers and Steph expressing uncertainty.
They explore how these beliefs, or lack thereof, influence their perspectives on life and death.
Age and Adulthood: A thoughtful discussion ensues about the concept of adulthood, with both hosts reflecting on aging and the ongoing journey of self-discovery.
Listener Questions: The episode includes a segment where fans send in voicemails with hypothetical and exaggerated scenarios, prompting the hosts to offer advice on maintaining boundaries and handling toxic relationships.
Community Support: Steph and Olivia emphasize the importance of community and mutual support among comedians, highlighting their collaborations and the significance of having a reliable support system.
True or False Game: Towards the end of the episode, a fun "True or False" segment is introduced, where Steph and Olivia answer rapid-fire questions, testing each other's knowledge and adding a lighthearted element to the discussion.
Sponsored Content: The episode includes promotional segments for sponsors like Twisted Tea and Alma, seamlessly integrating advertisements into the conversation without disrupting the flow of content.
In "Steph Tolev Loves Her Dog," Steph and Olivia offer listeners an authentic glimpse into their lives, blending humor with candid discussions about personal struggles, career challenges, and the pursuit of authenticity in a fast-paced, internet-driven world. Their chemistry and openness provide a relatable and engaging experience for both long-time fans and new listeners alike.
Notable Quotes:
Tune In: For those who haven't listened yet, this episode is a treasure trove of humor, honesty, and heartfelt conversations that resonate on multiple levels. Steph Tolev and Olivia's dynamic interplay ensures an engaging and memorable listening experience.