122: Son of a Gun with Anthony DeVito | Soder Podcast | EP 120

Summary

Soder Podcast

Episode 122: Son of a Gun with Anthony DeVito

Date: February 24, 2026
Host: Dan Soder
Guest: Anthony DeVito

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Episode Overview

This episode of the Soder Podcast features stand-up comic Anthony DeVito in a raw, hilarious, and unexpectedly moving conversation with Dan Soder. The main theme revolves around Anthony’s discovery of his late father's secret life as a “made man” in the Mafia, the impact this had on his upbringing, and the process of untangling complicated family legacies as an adult and a comedian. The conversation brings together laughter, vulnerability, and the unique way comedians find catharsis by mining pain for material. They also discuss Anthony’s solo show “Jersey Boy” (formerly “My Dad Is Not Danny DeVito”), the risks and responsibilities of telling true stories, and the unique tension between dark family truths, pride, and self-acceptance.

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Key Topics & Discussion Points

1. The Story Behind the Podcast Episode

[02:55 – 08:59]

• Context: Greg Stone, Anthony’s best friend and fellow comic, previously told a story involving Anthony’s father — a story they ultimately decided to edit out for safety and respect due to its sensitive (and dangerous) nature.
• Industry Talk: The two riff on how showbiz is full of “climbers” who lack boundaries, with both having seen comics betray each other for personal gain.
  • Memorable Quote:
    “You see people where they do the entertainment business equivalent of shooting their friend in the leg so the zombie can eat them.” – Dan Soder [07:00]
• Honesty in Comedy: Shout-out to Tim Dillon’s brutal honesty as a refreshing counterpoint.

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2. Anthony’s Dad: The Mafia Legacy

[08:59 – 12:05]

• Revealed Secret: Dan bluntly shares, “Your father was a professional killer for a very large mafia family.” [09:00]
  • Anthony clarifies: his father was a “made man,” meaning to achieve that status you had to kill for the mob.
• Anthony's Upbringing: His father died when he was only seven months old; he grew up not knowing the full story.
• Art Imitates Life: Anthony discusses his show and the evolution from the title "My Dad Is Not Danny DeVito" to "Jersey Boy" to better reflect the gravity of his family's story.
  • Quote: “They go, holy shit. Your father was involved with horrible people.” – Soder [10:57]

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3. Childhood Myths and Reality

[12:05 – 24:43]

• The Stories Told: Anthony was told his father died in a car accident—his mother carefully shaped his early perception.
• Toughening Up: Stories of bullies and learning to stick up for himself; his mom would tell him “your dad didn’t take shit from anyone” for encouragement.
  • Comically, a story emerges about Anthony’s third-grade rivalry with a kid named Kenny, culminating in a year-long “fight club” in the cloakroom.
    • “I’m not gonna fight you today. I’m gonna fight you for a full calendar year.” – Anthony DeVito [17:49]
  • The principal’s reaction: “I bet your dad is proud.” [22:03]
• Growing Up in a House of Women: Soder and DeVito bond over being raised without fathers and by strong, protective mothers.

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4. Discovery and Confrontation of the Truth

[24:43 – 35:12]

• Anthony’s Reluctance to Ask: As an only child, he refrained from questioning his mother, picking up on her sadness whenever his father was mentioned.
• The Revelation: At 18, a chance encounter at a basketball game leads to meeting a cousin from his father's side, forcing his mom to partially reveal the truth: his dad was a gangster.
• Piecing History Together: Over time, Anthony learns his dad wasn’t just a “regular guy” — though the full gravity remains obscure until years later.
• Anecdotes: Amusing aside about not being allowed to watch “The Godfather” growing up — his mom said it “maintains harmful stereotypes about Italian Americans.” [31:35]
  • “What a cool thing to find out your mom’s not a nerd, that she’s just protecting you.” – Soder [31:58]

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5. Processing Complicated Legacies

[35:12 – 54:54]

• Reconciling Idealism with Reality: Research as an adult leads Anthony to official records – mugshots, crime stories, realization his father died “in a trunk,” not a car accident.
  • “He was found in a trunk.” – DeVito [44:29]
  • “If you don’t go, ‘I’m having a heart attack, let me get in the trunk’ – people put you there.” – Soder [44:35]
• Complex Emotions: The struggle to integrate the “cool factor” of having a Mafia dad with the painful reality of organized crime, and not glamorizing the pain.
• Comedy as Therapy: Discussion on how comedians transform trauma (“dead dad jokes”) into material, and the healing that comes from acceptance.

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6. Family, Privacy & Telling the Story on Stage

[54:54 – 63:12]

• Timing in Comedy: Anthony waited years (late 30s) before addressing this story on stage. Initially, he refrained out of fear for family safety and respect; later, he wanted to “round it out and talk about it right.”
• Digging Deeper for the One-Man Show: When the show ("Jersey Boy") began to attract notice, word got back to the old family — the Mafia “sent a guy” to check it out.
  • “A couple weeks later I’m driving with my mom and she’s like, ‘oh, they sent a guy to check out the show’ – and that was terrifying.” – DeVito [58:11]
• Authenticity and Respect: Anthony wrote his show with his mother’s involvement and blessing, checking details to avoid disrespect or exposing secrets.
• Contact with the Family: Anthony has remained cautious and transparent, checking with extended family before any adaptation or commercial offer.
  • “I’ve reached out to them to be like, hey, so-and-so, this could be happening. What’s your say on this?” – DeVito [65:16]
  • They have, at times, vetoed ideas, and he’s respected their wishes.

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7. Reflections on Motherhood, Identity, and Comedy

[63:12 – End]

• Reframing His Mother: Understanding her life as a “Jersey hot girl dating a mobster” gave Anthony a new depth of empathy for her quirks, paranoia, and vanity.
  • “Hot enough to destroy your life.” – DeVito [67:46]
• Relationship with Extended Family: Any contact with his father’s side has been cordial, focusing on mutual respect and recognition of shared loss, not “infiltrating each other’s business.”
• On Not Making It His Whole Identity: Soder praises Anthony for not letting his father’s legacy define his comedic persona, noting that he remains “a fantastic stand-up comic” first and foremost.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the Entertainment & Crime Worlds:
  “The world that you’re describing is filled with respect and danger in a very real way. And then you’re in the fakest business on the planet.” – Dan Soder [65:33]
• On Honesty in Comedy:
  “The most fun thing is taking something that really hurt you and making fun of it. There’s like this feeling of power over it.” – Soder [42:27]
• On Parental Truths:
  “She did the right things with sort of letting this out, the way she let it out.” – DeVito [49:43]
• On Respecting the Past:
  “It’s always like they have to be informed. You check in, I check in.” – DeVito [66:34]
• On Coming to Peace Through Comedy:
  “I’ve done enough dead dad jokes … I’m kind of cool with it now, and I’m also personally in my life, done a lot of work where I’m at peace with it.” – Soder [43:11]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 02:55 — Salt & Pepper Tour: Early comedy days & friendship with Greg Stone
• 08:59 — Revelation: Anthony’s father was a “made man” in the Mafia
• 10:45 — The Show: Title evolution & weight of family history
• 13:13 — Childhood: What Anthony was told about his father growing up
• 17:49 — The Year-Long Schoolyard Fight Story
• 24:29 — The Encounter: Meeting his cousin, the “veil” begins to lift
• 31:35 — The Godfather ban: Stereotypes & family cover stories
• 44:29 — Discovering his father’s real cause of death (“found in a trunk”)
• 58:11 — The Mob Reacts: “They sent a guy to check out the show”
• 65:16 — Seeking Permission: Clearing projects with extended family
• 67:22 — New Understanding of His Mom (“hot girl dating a mobster”)
• 70:08 — The Future: Taping “Jersey Boy” and continuing the story

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Final Thoughts

This episode expertly weaves the deeply personal with the universal—the pain and pride of family secrets, the double-edged sword of mythic parentage, and the burden of inheriting a complicated legacy. Through their easy camaraderie and dark sense of humor, Soder and DeVito manage to elicit both laughter and reflection. Anthony’s journey, from innocent misunderstanding to cautious ownership of his truth, offers listeners both insight and comfort—especially those wrestling with legacies less cinematic but just as emotionally complex.

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Anthony DeVito:

• Watch his stand-up special (link in video description)
• Follow on Instagram for updates
• Look out for the taping of “Jersey Boy” in the coming year

Dan Soder:

• Catch him on tour (tour dates at dansoder.com)

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Recommended for:
Fans of personal storytelling, dark comedy, Mob lore, and anyone interested in how comedians process and present their deepest truths.

Transcript

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[Nick Swardson]

really buying a car online on Autotrader right now?

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[Nick Swardson]

At a playground?

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[Anthony DeVito]

Wow, your search can really get that specific.

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Really?

[Nick Swardson]

And you just put in your info and boom. Cars in your budget.

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[Nick Swardson]

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[Nick Swardson]

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[Anthony DeVito]

I think kid is walking up the slide. Kyle again?

[Nick Swardson]

Really?

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[Nick Swardson]

Thanks for watching my episode with Anthony DeVito. How great is he? He's very funny and this story is incredible. Buffalo, NY February 28th tickets are almost sold out. Go buy them right now if you're in the buffalo area. Dan soder.com it's going to be a great show. March 6th. I believe it is. March 6th Boston. We added a 9 o' clock show. So the sh. The 7 o' clock shows sold out at the Shubert. So we added a 9 o'. Clock. Dan Soder.com and then Philadelphia next night, March 7th. Almost sold out. I would buy tickets to that show. The lineup is fantastic. There might be a special guest. I'm just saying, Philly. There's some people I know that are from Philadelphia that might want to come and do some time on the show. You might want to buy a ticket to see a great show with some little extras. Little extras on the side. Dan Soder.com Go get your tickets. And then Dallas, Houston, Oklahoma City, Columbus, Ohio near Cleveland. It's not Cleveland, but it's near Cleveland. All available now. Dan Soder.com for the final leg of the Golden Retriever of Comedy tour, which has been so awesome. Thank you guys for showing up and we'll see you on these upcoming dates. What's interesting is, and this is a good way to start the podcast, we had Greg Stone, your best friend since middle school. High school.

[Anthony DeVito]

High school. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

You and Greg. Frickin frack. Mm. I love hanging out with you guys. Yeah. Goes. Goes back to our time when we would work the. We were comics up at Mohegan sun and Pepper Tour. The Salt and Pepper tournament. All three of us were salt and pepper. This is like 10 years ago.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

We were all starting to get salty. We were all starting to get gray on the temples, gray on top. And we did what we jokingly called the Salt and Pepper Tour. Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

But one weekend in comics. That's all it was.

[Nick Swardson]

Two weekends. I think we did two weekends. We did it twice.

[Anthony DeVito]

But the annual tour was one stop.

[Nick Swardson]

It was one stop. It was comics and Mohegan Z. Yeah. And one time, you and I, you, Greg and I went out and saw the Rock in Hercules.

[Anthony DeVito]

Oh, my God, man.

[Nick Swardson]

And then we were leaving so upset because of how bad it was that we were like, he might as well fought Undertaker. You might as well given wrestling fans what they wanted. All three of us were so mad leaving the Rock, starring as Hercules. And we drove through this tiny town in Connecticut where they had a gaming store. And we were like, it. Let's walk around. And then we walked in and I think I was. I just gotten billions. Or I was like on billions.

[Anthony DeVito]

It was around that time. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Started having a little extra money.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

And I bought a Nintendo 64. 4 controllers and WWF no Mercy Mario Tennis and like perfect dark. And we sat in that hotel the whole weekend. It was like a Wednesday to Saturday, I think. And we played so much Nintendo 64. We made all creator wrestlers on no Mercy. Yeah, you were big.

[Anthony DeVito]

You were.

[Nick Swardson]

You're a hunk. Hunk Finn.

[Anthony DeVito]

Hunk Finn. That's right.

[Nick Swardson]

That a Huck Finn. You were a hunk Finn. And you made a sexy guy in jean shorts. That would be thrust. Greg made Dr. Danger.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, man.

[Nick Swardson]

You had like a Jason mask. It was jacked. And then I made the Gator Gator. Gator Gator. It was just. And we cut promos on each other, but, dude, we would go in between shows at. This is at a casino where the comedy club is, but our rooms were upstairs. We, in between shows, would go upstairs and smoke weed and play N64.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, it was the best.

[Nick Swardson]

It was one of my favorite weekends.

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, it really was the best, man.

[Nick Swardson]

The reason I say all that, though, is Greg Stone was on the podcast and told a story about your dad.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

And then the episode came out, and then I got a call from Greg and he went, I fucked up. I fucked up. And I told the story I shouldn't have told. A lot of the times when that happens because we. We bank these episodes and so they, like, come out later. It's usually not a problem at all. We just pop in and edit it. But this one was out. This one was, like, out in the world. And Greg was like, I up telling storybook Anthony's dad and people that are dangerous are upset. And we were like, no, no, no,

[Anthony DeVito]

no, no, no, no.

[Nick Swardson]

So immediately cut it down. But what. We cut the story out, which we'll talk about, because you said it's cool to talk about. But of course, I think it's interesting that, you know people that wouldn't edit that out.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, well, I think people don't think twice about it. They don't. They don't. I think someone like yourself or just anyone who I guess is like, has, you know, how many comics do we know that just have an inherent lack of humanity?

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, a lot.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Most.

[Nick Swardson]

I think this business attract. It's mainly that because this business attracts people that can pretend to be human. In reality, you go, that was a fake out. That was a total fake out. I've. There's people that have done stuff, like, years into the business where I go, oh, they're a piece of.

[Anthony DeVito]

Oh, man.

[Nick Swardson]

That's why there's so. I would say, like, musicians are the least surprising when they're comics. It's like, oh, you tricked me.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Because some guys are immediately like, oh, you're a climber. You don't give a. But then you see people where they, like, do the entertainment business equivalent of shooting their friend in the leg so the zombie can eat them. That's what that feels like, where they go like, we're both running from these zombies. And they go, I'm running from these zombies. You shot me. And then as they're eating, they're like, yeah, there are. And I've seen it. You just stop associating with those people.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, it's weird. It's weird when they let that out of the box like a decade in. Yeah, something.

[Nick Swardson]

That's something that I've always really, really, really Admired in Tim Dillon is that from the beginning, he goes, I don't give a shit about anything they say. We're friends. I'll shoot you if zombies are coming. And you go. And I know that. And that's why I like having you on my squad.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

But once you get through that with Tim, you realize he's more honest than a lot of people. Right? This. Yeah, that's the best part about Tim.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

He comes forward with that honesty, and you go, I know what I'm dealing.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

It's the people that go, are you doing okay? And then they fudgeing, stab you in the back. Are you okay?

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, then once they find out the information, they turn around and tell the next person, guess who's not doing okay.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. You know who? I found out who's close to suicide. I told you that. The fuck are you doing?

[Anthony DeVito]

You were at my wedding.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Why would you do that? And they go, I know. No one's on a podcast.

[Anthony DeVito]

I had nothing to say at a bar.

[Nick Swardson]

I've had it where, like, people who aren't. I've told stories about people and. And probably, like, tried to hide their names, but, like, people in my personal life that are like, dude, you can't tell that story.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

And you go, it's a good story.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

But Greg felt res. Like, it was obvious that Greg was like, dude, I told the story about Anthony DeVito. Can you please cut it? And we. I don't even think we batted an eye. We're like, yeah, we'll pull it down and cut it. No, the story was, yes, your father was a professional killer for a very large mafia family.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, well, he was a. He was a made guy.

[Nick Swardson]

He was a made man.

[Anthony DeVito]

Part of. I mean, you know, I think you would know this. And like, you know, I guess people that weren't as well versed might not. But like to become. That means you do have to kill someone in order to obtain that rank. So he wasn't.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah, you're not a made guy, cuz you're super fun.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right? They're like, his spreadsheets were incredible.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. I'm gonna tell you right now. He's punctual, stays late. He's a made man.

[Anthony DeVito]

He's got the coolest hats.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. There's a book, the Iceman by Philip Carlo about Richard Klinsky. They tell this story about how he got. He wasn't a made man, but how he started working with the families in the 80s. And again, you don't know if these stories are 100% true. Guy killed a lot of people, so why would he lie about this story? But he said the first time that he got in with the mob, this was the 70s, early 70s. And they're driving around the West Village and a guy was walking his dog and they park and the guy goes, kill him. And they hand him the gun. And they said the reason they worked with him is Klinsky didn't even bat an eye.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

He just went out, shot the dude, got back in the car and was like, what else? And they were like, oh, okay. I mean, it turned out Richard Klinsky was a straight up serial killer, but that is the kind of shit you have to do.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

They're like, hey, if we need you in this tough situation. How old were you when your dad died?

[Anthony DeVito]

I was seven months old.

[Nick Swardson]

So. Okay, so it was.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. So this all happens after or happens well before I'm born.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

But there is. And it's not that book, so I'm not even trying to allude is, but there is a book that is written about my father's family, which in that book, that's when things got. And this only happened like a couple summers ago because I started doing the show about him some years ago, which is my dad.

[Nick Swardson]

My dad is not Danny DeVito.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Anthony DeVito in the show. My dad is not Danny DeVito.

[Anthony DeVito]

I apparently was because Sam's now producing it. So. I love that. Yeah. Which is awesome.

[Nick Swardson]

I love that.

[Anthony DeVito]

But yes. I think that was such a light hearted title for what the show was.

[Nick Swardson]

I mean, they go. They go, holy shit. Your father was involved with horrible people.

[Anthony DeVito]

So we had to change the name to Jersey Boy just to give a. Like, just to. It's subtle, but still gives like. Okay, there, there's. There's something going on here other than the fact that like, oh, we're just going to see a light hearted show about a guy who shares the same last name as a famous actor.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah, as. As Frank. Yeah. From always. Sorry.

[Anthony DeVito]

Frank Reynolds.

[Nick Swardson]

As Frank Reynolds. My dad. My dad's much different than Frank. Instead of drinking, it was murder. Well, that's. I mean, is someone. You know, one of the notes I always get is that I always talk about my dead dad. I always talk about sobriety. But then I also get a lot of people that go like, I have a dead dad. And it's fun to hear people talk about it because it's a way to Ian finance. And I did a whole episode that I really didn't think much of and Then people were like, dude, the way you talked about that, I've helped me. And it made me feel really good.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

Because they were like, I didn't realize I had the same feeling. Kind of that feeling of when you grow up, you learn who your dad is as a human being.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

And you go, not the best. Yeah, yeah. Whether he's a deadbeat, whether he's an organized in organized crime, whether he's that. I think a lot of it is, like, if you're abandoned or your dad dies, you kind of do a thing. You get a situation that I wished for when I was young, which is, oh, he had a secret, badass life.

[Anthony DeVito]

Sure.

[Nick Swardson]

My dad just was a drunk, Right. He was just a selfish drunk. But like, the movie Wanted with Angelina Jolie, which is based on a comic book, is about this kid who's these. These. He's like, in high school, and these strange people come to him and they're like, your dad was like, the world's best assassin.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

And he's like, I don't know if I want to be. It's about him. Like, I don't know if I want to be that.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Obviously, it's a comic book. So it gets like, crazy.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right. The Curvy bullet movie, Right?

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

Okay. That's what I know about it.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. It's this crazy Jolie coming out of the bath. Yeah. Back and then her. The bending. The bullet.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Did you have that moment? What was the moment where you find out. Oh, my dad was like. Because what were you told?

[Anthony DeVito]

So I was told. And. And I think this was kind of like the luxury that I had where it's like, you, you, you. I. I didn't know who my dad. Like, my mom had good reason to keep exactly who he was from me.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

So she had this luxury of, like, he could be whoever she wanted him to be to sort of suit my wants.

[Nick Swardson]

Who did. Who was he originally in your life?

[Anthony DeVito]

Who was he originally was like, all I knew when I was a kid, that he died in a car accident at seven months old. That's what I was told.

[Nick Swardson]

Okay.

[Anthony DeVito]

And any sort of. Any question. I think the only thing she ever told me real about him was whenever she felt like maybe she needed to. Like, I hadn't grown since first grade. So by the time I hit third grade, this dyslexic kid, Kenny, was picking on me.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

And she was like. She made it a point to be like, your dad didn't take shit from anyone.

[Nick Swardson]

So what a crazy.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, I know.

[Nick Swardson]

Preview to find out who your dad is. Crazy thing to say to your kid to find later what you found out or you go, let's just put it this way. Your father wouldn't have put up with that. And you go, okay, I don't understand what you're referencing. I just want you to know. Let's just say that kid would have a lot of harder time reading numbers and letters.

[Anthony DeVito]

Your dad could beat up his dad.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. So she would say that. She would be like, your dad wouldn't.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

And so what happened to Kenny?

[Anthony DeVito]

So what happened to Kenny?

[Nick Swardson]

Let's just say he didn't come back to school. You go for it.

[Anthony DeVito]

So what happened to Kenny? And a couple moving parts of the story. So he.

[Nick Swardson]

He.

[Anthony DeVito]

For one day, he decides to. We had a classroom suggestion box. So he drops a note in the box and he goes. He wrote down, missing Gianni is a bitch. Then he signed my name. But I knew it was him. His learning disability. He did call her a batch. So great.

[Nick Swardson]

God. If you're going to get picked on, get picked on by a dumb person.

[Anthony DeVito]

It was awesome.

[Nick Swardson]

Because it just. The rebuttals are. I love it.

[Anthony DeVito]

So she doesn't. She's like. Doesn't realize. So to make an example out of me, she makes me spell the word in front of the whole class.

[Nick Swardson]

Bitch.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes. So I do it in the spelling bee cadence. Bitch. B, A, T, C, H. Bitch. You know, she sends me the principal's office. He sends me back to class. Kenny comes up to me and he goes, I'm going to fight you today. And what he, like, didn't realize, like, when you're tiny and you make up for stature with psychosis.

[Nick Swardson]

It is the reason Napoleon dominated Western Europe.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

They're not saying that because it's like a cool thing to go. Napoleonic complex. It's straight up. That's a tiny container filled with. With pure diesel fuel.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. And you have to make up for just reach.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

With just intensity. Just. I will. I will.

[Nick Swardson]

I'll.

[Anthony DeVito]

I'll go. I'll die before you win.

[Nick Swardson]

I had a friend. I won't. His last name. My buddy Carrie. Already a dude with a. With a lady name gets picked.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, sure.

[Nick Swardson]

Tough as hell. Short king. There was a Older, scary and like a senior when we were sophomores. And he was like, threatening Carrie. And Carrie was. And he hit this level where everyone in our group was like, you don't. With care.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Because he was like, if he said this in the weight room in front of, like, we're sophomores or freshmen or sophomores. This guy's older. And he goes, if you hit me, you better knock me out.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

Because I'll keep coming after you. And everyone was like, yeah, everyone said that. And they were like. And the guy he was talking to was legitimately terrifying.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So you were like, oh, don't. He'll kick the out of you.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Because that's all you have. Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

It's the reason that giant guys have to be gentle giants.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

You just have to adjust for it. It's like when you meet a guy who's 6, 8, 500 pounds and he's just like, hello. And like pets you and you go, this is great. Short guys will your up.

[Ad Host]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So yeah, that makes sense.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes. It's like a survival technique.

[Nick Swardson]

And what grade is this?

[Anthony DeVito]

Third grade.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, buddy.

[Anthony DeVito]

So it's biting territory. Oh, biting.

[Nick Swardson]

It's biting and scratching.

[Anthony DeVito]

Biting, scratching, clawing, kicking. I'm all wet, it hadn't rained, stuff like that.

[Nick Swardson]

So he says he's gonna fight you.

[Anthony DeVito]

So he says he's gonna fight me. I turn around to him based on, you know, size, and then empowered by what my mom said and I said, I'm not gonna fight you today. I'm gonna fight you for a full calendar year.

[Nick Swardson]

You gave him a year?

[Anthony DeVito]

I gave him a full year.

[Nick Swardson]

I'll fight you every day for a year.

[Anthony DeVito]

That's what it was.

[Nick Swardson]

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[Anthony DeVito]

So the back of our classroom, we had a coat room that in the. Before school would just be a fight club. Kids would lock the doors, shut the lights, and I would just go at them. And also, I was raised. And not to be too bane about it, but I was raised in a basement.

[Nick Swardson]

He's. You were built for that.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Kenny had no fucking clue what he was walking in.

[Anthony DeVito]

And I am an unorthodox fighter.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. As we're in the Queensberry rules, this guy's getting trapped in a closet. This is like how you make Spartans.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

This is like Spartan training.

[Anthony DeVito]

I am like Prince Nassim.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Just put him in there. And that man comes out. And also, New Jersey public schools. What are you doing? Yeah, you guys are just building little fight fight closets. So every. How it last with you fighting him?

[Anthony DeVito]

It probably. I. We didn't make the year, obviously.

[Nick Swardson]

What was your record?

[Anthony DeVito]

I mean, I. I think I was pretty much undefeated. I don't know that he got one on me, man.

[Nick Swardson]

Was there a moment where he broke.

[Anthony DeVito]

No, I think it just kind of naturally drifted apart. But I think. I mean, like, the. There wasn't a lot. The rounds weren't long.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure the teacher's going to come in here to get in trouble.

[Anthony DeVito]

There wasn't a lot of time, but. And this is further, like, what you're saying about, like, Jersey public schools is like, I never got in trouble because the principal. Because I was so much smaller than him, and the principal was like, hey, this isn't good, but he is twice your size, and you didn't back down. And that he literally said to me, I bet your dad is proud.

[Nick Swardson]

You go, well, funny thing about my dad, I think I'm finding out. I think he would have been proud.

[Anthony DeVito]

I think he might have been disappointed. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

He didn't use a. Use a weapon.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

What kid am I? You break off the coat rack and now you got a fucking whooping stuff.

[Anthony DeVito]

You firebomb his lunchbox.

[Nick Swardson]

I don't want you to attack him. I want his whole family. Does your. Does your mom find out that you're fighting at school?

[Anthony DeVito]

She was. And she was proud because. Same thing. Like, it's this, like, Jersey, like, sort of mindset. Sure. Like, she. And I think one of her worries is that. And, like, you know, I am a soft guy. But one of her worries was along the way, without a father, it was all women in my household. So it's like my mom, my grandma, my great grandma, my aunt.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

So she was worried that I would be kind of like a little. Built like a flower. Yeah. So she was happy in that moment that I wasn't, and I stuck up for myself.

[Nick Swardson]

These child. People don't realize when you don't have a dad, you need childhood trauma in order for you to be tough.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Because you see guys that are. That don't have it, and you go, yeah, you probably could have been picked on a little bit when you were a kid. And I think with me, it was one of those things where she was like, my mom, way different, but was like, stand up for yourself.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Don't let that happen. Because when you're around women, you have, like, emotional response. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kid goes like, I'm gonna bully you. And you go, with those shoes. I don't understand.

[Ad Host]

Sorry.

[Nick Swardson]

No, but you're right. You're just like. But you also go, like, why are you being like this?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

You, like, want to emotionally Rationalize. And you can't do that with a bully. A bully, you got to just go punch him in the mouth. Did Kenny, as you got older, change at all? Was, like, out of your life? Or was he like, hey, sorry I fucked with you?

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, we actually, yeah, we ended up, like, middle school. We would rollerblade together. And then, you know, high school, we drifted ways. And he, as an adult, went to jail for stabbing someone. So I know it's like, pretty good. I got him.

[Nick Swardson]

You got that in at the right time. Before he learned about weapons. Turns out Kenny might have been a problem if he got a weapon.

[Anthony DeVito]

And there is a folder in my phone called Sunsets. So to go a bit different ways.

[Nick Swardson]

So you. So when you find that out, when does your mom start filling in the information about, like, hey, listen, your. Your. Your dad was in. Like, when does your mom reveal that your dad was a criminal?

[Anthony DeVito]

That it. She sort of a moment forced her hand because I. And like you're saying about being raised by all women or without that you do develop an emotional intelligence and a sensitivity.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. I think you become very empathetic.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. So with my mom, it felt like. And she was always very chee. Hurtful as a person, but whenever my dad would come up, there seemed to be a sadness that would come over her, so. And she was a great mom, so I never asked about him. I just didn't want her to be sad. It was very simple kid sort of logic.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Or you just saw your mom being sad, and you're like, were you an only child?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Okay, so that's even.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

This is something that Katie is always like, I don't think impressed, but, like, curious by. She's like, that relationship. I go, it's one to one. So everything she says is just to you, and everything you say is just to her. You don't have a third person to go.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

The fuck Is like, you don't have a sibling to go, is. Mom seems sad when you talk about that. You just have to bring it up to her.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

And so is that what you did?

[Anthony DeVito]

So I know I was playing 18, and it was a long stretch of time that goes by, but, like, I had a good childhood. I had a lot of friends. I was a busy kid. So it did. It just didn't seem like something that I like. It seemed like something she became sad about and something that, like, I was fine without also, too. You got to keep in mind, this is like North Jersey in the 90s. All the dads I'm seeing They're not soft. That, like, these are hostile, repressed, Italian American guys. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

These are the Giants. Lose, I'm gonna hit you.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

This is like Derek Jeter, you know, is the only man that can save you from a beating. Yeah. If he comes in. So you're around all these dads. Was there ever anyone else in your world that maybe gave a clue or a tip off that your dad was involved with some nefarious.

[Anthony DeVito]

Not really. I think my family was all in on it just for the sake of keeping me protected from it. Just because, like, I think they knew, given how I was as a kid too. Like, you know, I was a soft kid. I. I played sports, but I also, like, I love to draw. I was like a little bit of, like, they could tell, like, I was a little bit of a weirdo. You know what I mean? I think they knew, like, the road ahead might be a little difficult as it is.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

So why not? Let's not burden him with this as well.

[Nick Swardson]

Man, it's so funny how organized crime and alcoholics have the same. Everyone goes, we don't let them know about this.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

Because you know what I mean? Maybe we don't let him know his dad's a fall down drunk. Maybe we just say he likes his juice. But you're like, yeah, your dad was in the money business. So when you're 18, what makes her.

[Anthony DeVito]

So I'm 18, I'm playing pickup in the park, and there was a guy there who I'd never seen before. And this wasn't this completely coincidental. After the game, everyone's calling my last name. After the game, he comes up to me, is like, your last name is DeVito? I was like, yeah. He goes, I'm your cousin from your father's side. So I, I was excited.

[Nick Swardson]

Did you know any of your dad's family?

[Anthony DeVito]

When I was really little, my grandmother on my dad's side, which you know.

[Nick Swardson]

His mom.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, his mom and I think, like, what would be a cousin, I guess, like one of my uncle's kids. We would meet for breakfast like every couple months. But it was nothing more than that.

[Nick Swardson]

There was nobody doing.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, kid shit, kid.

[Nick Swardson]

How excited are you for Christmas?

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

That kind of stuff never, like, hey, you're not being disrespected. I think everyone thinks a meeting.

[Anthony DeVito]

The way you ordered your milk at friendlies was a bit disrespectful.

[Nick Swardson]

I'm going to tell you right now, we don't do chocolate milk. We don't do chocolate anything. And you go, all right, so that racism is. That racism is taught, not learned. Okay? It's not there. First thing first, don't ever order chocolate milk around me again. Because those people, you're like, whoa, Jesus. So you're at this basketball game and this guy just goes, I'm your cousin.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Because I'm your cousin. I go home and tell my mom kind of excited just because it is all women in my household. This is like a guy, and I'm an only child.

[Nick Swardson]

What do you look like?

[Anthony DeVito]

He looked like. He looked like me, but he was so much. He looked. He had all the features that I have, but all more handsome.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, wow.

[Anthony DeVito]

He was like six inches taller. His hair was, like, perfectly coiffed. His eyebrows were plucked.

[Nick Swardson]

You go, mom, what did you do to me? Gave me ass jeans. Look at this family. God damn. Dad came from a bunch of hunks.

[Anthony DeVito]

It was like a D and as, like someone obsessed with basketball at the time. He's like a decent player.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, you played with him?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, I didn't know you guys were playing basketball at the park.

[Anthony DeVito]

We were playing basketball. The park. He was like a good rebounder. Good fade away, solid job. Like all these things.

[Nick Swardson]

Keeps a secret guy. That was a lockbox from secrets. So you go home, you tell your mom I met this cousin.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Do you see that sadness?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. She. You could see because this is the moment she had been running from ever since I was born. So you could see it all come to the surface on her face and. And she got, like, stark white. And I had never seen her. I'd never seen that face before. And, you know.

[Nick Swardson]

Scared.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes. And when you're an only child, like, you see, you see, like, there's nowhere to run.

[Nick Swardson]

Well, you're. You're in the foxhole with that person. So every reaction, you've seen all of them. Yeah, man. Like, I remember when my mom would, like, have money troubles. I immediately knew, even without her saying, like, super stressed out. And I'd be like, yeah, when you're just little, you're kind of like, are you all right?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yep.

[Nick Swardson]

You don't go, like, lean in and go, what's going on? But you do a little. You're their kid and you go, like, is everything okay? And sometimes they tell you the truth, and sometimes they. They know the truth is probably a little too heavy for you to handle. So she probably knew this is too heavy to handle. But now you're 18.

[Anthony DeVito]

Now I'm 18. Exactly. And now it becomes, like, a bit of a safety issue because now it's like she goes, they're in communication with whatever that communication is. They're in communication with you.

[Nick Swardson]

They got you.

[Anthony DeVito]

They got to me. So this has to be said in case they want to befriend you. You should know exactly who he is. So it's really that everything she ever did was out of protection of me.

[Nick Swardson]

In that moment, what does it feel like where she starts peeling back the layers? Are you, like, excited and scared?

[Anthony DeVito]

I think I'm more confused just because. Also, too, I was purposely, like, I wasn't allowed to watch the Godfather as a kid. Like, I was. Yeah, I was kept.

[Nick Swardson]

That's so. Like, Goodfellas.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. No, man, I couldn't watch any scors. Yeah. She was like, you can see silence.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. That's so fucking funny. Maybe the one where Leo's crazy. I don't know.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, the Aviator's fine. She vets them all.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. She goes, howard Hughes. Worst case, you're wearing Kleenex boxes on your feet. But none of that Ginzo shit. That is crazy.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, man.

[Nick Swardson]

That you're like, damn, my mom should have stopped me from watching Roadhouse and Cocktail. I blame you, Trish. Why didn't you ban these alcoholic movies?

[Anthony DeVito]

Why didn't you keep the program from me?

[Nick Swardson]

Why was I allowed to watch bar movies? I shouldn't have been allowed to watch any bar movie. Did you ever ask, were you ever like, why can't I watch the Godfather?

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, this was. I mean, it is a joke in the show, but it is. She told me, and this is true. She said you just tell people that movie maintains harmful stereotypes about Italian Americans.

[Nick Swardson]

I know. Mrs. DeVito, beautiful job using something for a different purpose. Because if I had a kid whose dad was in the Mafia, I would. That's a perfect excuse.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right?

[Nick Swardson]

You go. It's an unfair stereotype to Italians. You're an Italian American. I want you to be proud of being an Italian American. And it's not all this mob shit. What a cool thing to find out that your mom's not a nerd, that she's just protecting you. Because there's a lot of Italian kids that would wish that they would find out their dad was in the Mob and not that their mom's just a dork, just that their mom doesn't know good movies. Shut up. So when this conversation happens, is it all at once? Does she rip the band aid after your cousin?

[Anthony DeVito]

No, no, no, no. She withheld a lot of stuff. She basically told me what I needed to hear in her head at the Time. So that's when she told me he. She was like. She didn't tell me how he died, but she said he wasn't a regular guy. He was a made man in a crime family.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

And. But I kept from that. I really didn't know what that meant. But I only knew. I also only knew, like, how heavy that was for my mom to say.

[Nick Swardson]

Did she seem relieved?

[Anthony DeVito]

She seemed relieved, but then she also seemed very panicked because, like, before, that there was no chance of me letting out the secret because I didn't know about it, and now there was. So she was very adamant that I never tell anyone. Like, that was her. She was. That was her big thing. And it seems so serious.

[Nick Swardson]

Hey, dad. Hey, you. I fucking. I'm okay with it, but don't tell other people. People. Your dad's gay as hell, dad. That's what I would do if I was your mom. I'd have been like, your dad was such a queen. Like, I don't know. He's out there getting boofed somewhere. He didn't die in a car accident. He's on Fire island sucking. And. Yeah. My.

[Anthony DeVito]

My movies. Searching for the boo.

[Nick Swardson]

The boofing dude. That. That's what my mom should have told my dad. He's in the Tenderloin right now, just covered in C. And you go, oh, no. I had to go to the Castro district and pull my dad out of a bath house. That's so fun.

[Anthony DeVito]

So much glitter on his eyelash.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, my God. The amount of assless chaps. That's where all your child support went, was booty glitter and assless chaps. But it's like, also, when you're finding that out, did it feel cool to know your dad was in one of the good fit, like the big families?

[Anthony DeVito]

It kind of did.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Because you don't want your dad being in the. The double Triple A. You go, your dad was in the major.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. She never told me the exact family. I would find this out later. But, like, because. And they weren't. He. They were an affiliate of one of the family.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure, sure. Listen, I understand all that. I ain't. We're not poking a sleeping bear.

[Anthony DeVito]

That's what.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. I'm just saying where your placement is kind of nice. Kind of nice. You ain't even one that can get easily knocked over. I'm just saying, if they went after your dad's family, there would be a war. They're the Yankees. Yeah. Let's just say they're doing pretty good. People are checking in with Them does that once that moment happens, were you watching God, Were you secretly watching it?

[Anthony DeVito]

No, I never. It was because of the amount of fear that was in her voice about never tell this to anyone. I didn't want to pry for. I didn't want to become more interested in it.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

And then on the off chance I would tell somebody this just because it seems so serious. So.

[Nick Swardson]

It is.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

And it is like, you know, I think we're in the era now where like crime is, you know, our politicians do crime. It's not really sure, it's not mafia, but when the, when the mob was big, especially on the east coast, people were very real about it. It wasn't like, oh my God, this fun. What are you living good? It was like, yo, these people can do something to you.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

They can reach out and touch you. My dad worked at a liquor store or whatever, but the mob in San Francisco used to control the trash. It was like very well known. He had this friend that worked for the trash company that would get us 49ers tickets that were so good that you were like, even at 8 years old, I'm like, this is crazy. We're 20 up at the 40 yard line for Steve Young's first start against the Rams. Like after Montana gets traded, right. My dad lives with his mom on a pull out couch. There's no way he's like saving money.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. You're like, he must have run a radio contest or something.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. We get, when we got tickets to wwf, it was like at Cal palace, really good seats. And it was his friend Ted Teddy, who, you know, God knows if that was his name. Sure was this good look Italian dude that would. That did the trash pickup in the neighborhood for the liquor store. And I remember not even thinking about it. But then when my mom's boyfriend started a vendor business, like a vending machine business, it was my dad's old friend who's my mom's boyfriend. And he went, he's get. He's getting into that. And I go, yeah. He goes, that's the fucking mob dude. And I remember him saying that to me on the phone when I was like 12. And I was like, I don't think the mobs in Colorado. And my dad was like, it's just weird. The vending machine business is fucked up. I'd watch out. That's like. And then I found out in San Francisco, it was like, that was one of their things too, right? So I think the mob was very real in the 80s and 90s in a way where it could like reach out and touch you in a terrifying way.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, I mean, they ran the country. Country.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

You know, it wasn't until, I mean, at least for the five families. And I'm saying this, this is anecdotal obviously, but like, you know, Giuliani and like the rep. But before that, I mean, like, they controlled all the labor unions. So if you did that at the time, they controlled the country.

[Nick Swardson]

They controlled the. Yeah, like everything.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

That's why Hoffa disappeared.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

Because they would control all this and if you didn't do it, they would just. They had ways of getting you either hurt or eliminated.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

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[Anthony DeVito]

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[Nick Swardson]

We've planned for the plot twists, so

[Anthony DeVito]

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[Nick Swardson]

So it makes sense why your mom is so afraid and being like, please don't open this door.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

How did she leave it about your cousin? Did she say, don't ever talk to him again?

[Anthony DeVito]

She was just kind of like, you know, if you see him again, you can. You can be friendly, but, like, that's it. You know, be very aware that if they want to take this further, like, no second locations. You know what I mean? That kind of thing.

[Nick Swardson]

Don't ever go to a second location with an Italian cousin. I've always heard that. Not hippies. That's the 30 Rock joke. Everyone knows that. Lemon. Never go to a second location with a hippie. But you. Did you see him again?

[Anthony DeVito]

Maybe once or twice. And then it was just. It was cordial, but I felt a little strange. And he never, I think, on their end. And it was like his family also, they were, like, getting out from under it, you know what I mean?

[Nick Swardson]

So they're trying to clean up.

[Anthony DeVito]

So they're trying to clean up as well. But. But they've always been very respectful of, like, each, you know, my own privacy and whatever that is. And I. And I think the same went on their end. So it never really went further than that.

[Nick Swardson]

At what point in your life do you go, I need to learn more. I want to learn more. When does the where, where. Where does the understanding of your mom's fear and not wanting to push fade?

[Anthony DeVito]

I think in my 30s, okay. I think they're just been at enough time where I'm. Where, I mean, you know, like, you're 18. You're technically an adult, but, like, you're a teenager. Exactly. But I think when you hit. And even your 20s, I would say so, but I think when you hit your, like, early 30s, mid-30s, and when your friends start having kids, like, sure, they're you're really starting to do adult things outside of just like you're one on paper, I think, and you're self actualized in a way that you haven't been. That you go, okay, I'm ready to take this on now. I think that's really what it was where I was like, I think I'm emotionally mature to handle whatever is on the other side of the door that comes with this. And I think doing stand up too, where it's like. And especially the way you do stand up as well, where it's like, it's super personal. You're super purging everything inside of you. Not just as a means of just like being vulnerable to an audience, but also as a means to like, like process these difficult feelings.

[Nick Swardson]

I think that's what like, for people that do personal comedy, I think a lot of people would agree that it's like the most fun thing is taking someone that really something that really hurt you and making fun of it. There's like this feeling of power over it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yep.

[Nick Swardson]

Where you go, like, I used to be so, yeah. Scared about talking about this that I can make fun of it. And that's why, like, I felt bad for people that liked my stand up. Because you're like, I trust me, I'm getting the dead dad stuff out. I'm working through it. I know I do a lot of jokes about it. I'm almost like, yes. Because I'm at the point now in my career where I don't want to talk about it anymore. I've done enough dead dad stuff. I've done enough dead dad jokes that you go, I'm kind of cool with it now. And I'm also personally in my life, done a lot of work where I'm, yeah, I'm at peace with it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yep.

[Nick Swardson]

And I think that is part of the creative process of like trying to find peace. But when you're finding peace, what I found out was just that my dad didn't want to be my dad. Dad, that sucks. When do you find out, like, oh, my dad was legit in. Because your mom's saying, he's a made man to me in my mind. And I don't know if you reacted like this, I would react away when they would go, like, your dad was a fighter pilot and he got shot.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Where you go, is that just the story you're telling me to make him seem cooler?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, a bit of me was that. And my mom was. My mom is a liar in so many ways. So there was a Part of me that was like, what is real? What isn't real here? I think there was always a part, maybe a little part of me that was afraid to look because it was kind of fun to have this unique secret, you know, and, you know, so I. So I think there was a part of me that was like, oh, am I going to be crestfallen when I find out? It's not exactly how it seemed. So at around 30, I googled him, you know, for. And the first thing that popped up was a Daily News headline. And it was like, listed he was in prison for however many years. The charges that he was in on and then how he died.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

And that was the one, I think, that combo. So my mom said it was a car accident.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

He was found in a trunk.

[Nick Swardson]

Got it.

[Anthony DeVito]

So.

[Nick Swardson]

And I don't know if you know this, when you're dying, you don't put yourself in a truck.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

For those of you who are at home, it is. If you don't go, I'm having a heart attack. Click open your trunk and you go, ah, this is where I'm gonna lay a nice little sarcophagus.

[Anthony DeVito]

I believe it's a car. On purpose.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. It's not an accident. It's a very. On purpose.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So when you read that, do you remember, like, was that a traumatic moment for you?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, it was. It was. Because it's still. I could still find good in him because. And I didn't know anything about it all. And my mom and my family were always telling me the good things about him which did exist. It continues to, you know.

[Nick Swardson]

Well, that's the complicated thing about humans. People aren't all good and all that. And it's very like, especially with a. With your father or with a family member, you want. You need the good. You need the sweetness in order to take the sour.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Of like, what it is like, you know, I did a very unhealthy thing because my dad died when I was 14, so I still thought he was like this cool dude because he was very funny, very charming. Would get a lot of. That's what killed him. But it's like he was a charming, fun guy. And the hard part was going, he's a piece of.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

Like, he. He didn't give a. About me. And that's really hard when you're. I think, by the way, this is for people with living parents too.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

You're. You're seeing as they get older, like, it's easier to do. But when they die, when you're young. They're kind of of stuck in this place. Yeah, they're fixed exactly where you go. No, I want him to be these cool things. So when you read those headlines, is it immediately like, a drop, or are you, like, kind of holding on to some of the good stuff, too, going, yeah, this is bad. But also maybe, like, I don't know. I guess what I'm asking is, were you immediately firing out excuses for him in your head as you're reading this article?

[Anthony DeVito]

No, I think there was. I mean, there's really no room to finesse his character and prove print. It's just kind of is what it is. Like, so I think for me, it was more like, okay, now you have to reconcile. You know, all these things. You know, my aunts, my uncle being like, he was this great guy. He did, you know, these things. Read bedtime stories to your aunt. Like, all of those things are in this box. But now what's also in this box is that, like, he did take people off of this earth. And as someone who.

[Nick Swardson]

What a cool way of saying your dad was an assassin. My father, let's just say, plucked people from this realm. And you go, yeah, absolutely. I love that.

[Anthony DeVito]

So, yeah. So that now exists there, too. And then did it change?

[Nick Swardson]

Did that change the way. I don't want to say that it's, like, cool to be like, oh, dude, my dad was a bat. Yeah, but it is.

[Anthony DeVito]

It. No, it is, man.

[Nick Swardson]

It is like, listen, I'm sorry. There is something about it where you're, like, badass.

[Anthony DeVito]

No, man. Of course. Like that. I think that sort of, like, the yin and yang of that has always been, like, the conflict within me of being like. I do think it is cool, and. But then.

[Nick Swardson]

But you can also say it's bad.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly. So it's like, you know, I mean, I think it's like the way, like, the reason why Scorsese wanted to make goodfellas in Mean Streets is, like, he did want to show the glamour of what that is, but then he also wanted to show. So here's the end game of what that is. So to.

[Nick Swardson]

On a much lesser extent, it's like finding old pictures of your parents smoking inside. You go, that's cool as. And then you go, baby. That was a baby in the room. You selfish. I didn't know you go outside and smoke your cigarette.

[Anthony DeVito]

I didn't know you were a Russian teenager.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Like, what the is wrong with you? Like, I find pictures from my mom in the 70s, and she's got a. A Cigarette in her hand, and I'm like, that's so cool. And then there was one where me and my dad, he's, like, holding me, but there's a pack of Marlboro Reds and an ashtray right there. And you're like, you smoking inside. When I was a baby.

[Anthony DeVito]

It's really funny.

[Nick Swardson]

But, yeah, I mean, there is, like, a thing where you want to go, like, it is cool.

[Anthony DeVito]

It is. It is. So it was a weird thing, because now that I knew more and I had, like, concrete, like, oh, this was real. And I do think it is. Is cool. But then.

[Nick Swardson]

So did you bring that to your mom?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

How did you tell her that you Googled him?

[Anthony DeVito]

I. I think I just called her immediately. I think it was so. It was. It was so jarring that I called her immediately.

[Nick Swardson]

What was her reaction?

[Anthony DeVito]

She cried immediately. Yeah, she cried because it's like.

[Nick Swardson]

Like, I let you down.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Like, I lied like that. And. And for me, honestly, I was, like, very grateful that she did. You know, I. I never. I was never in the can. This is what I mean. Like, we were talking earlier about some people's reactions being different. I remember doing a podcast one. Like, somebody was like, did you. Were you mad that your mom lied to you? And it's like, it's such a. It's such a crazy. Like, of course not. Like, this was all done out of protection of me. I never counted them as lies as much as it was like, man, she did the right things with sort of letting this out, the way she let it out.

[Nick Swardson]

There's a difference between lying and. There's a difference between lying to shield you from things.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

And she was just shielding you from the fact that. That as a little boy. It's good you found out in your 30s.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Because as a little boy, if you find out your father, people, it might change your 100. Yeah, I mean, that makes sense. It might change the way you look at. View the world.

[Anthony DeVito]

You view the world. It also changes. Like, you're malleable enough as a little boy to go, like, that's who I am, too.

[Nick Swardson]

Because you want to be like.

[Anthony DeVito]

Because you want to be like that. So it's like. So that was kept. You know, that kept me from that. And then. Then she cried in the way of, like, you said, like, I let you down. And then it was me crying, too, being like you didn't. I now understand all of the things, you know.

[Nick Swardson]

Did that bring you two closer together?

[Anthony DeVito]

It did. Yes, it did.

[Nick Swardson]

Like, her finally being able to share Everything.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

And did she?

[Anthony DeVito]

No, she still didn't. But some of it is just due to like it's. You know, she'll say things like to this day she'll say things like very offhandedly that like. Like cuz the. The memories sort of just like spark and go away kind of stuff. But like. No. I remember we driving once and offhandedly she was like, you know, John Gotti was at your christening and I was

[Nick Swardson]

like what the Teflon dog is. Is watching you get water splashed on your head. That's crazy. Which I would guess. And I don't know but that would mean Sammy the Bull might have been in tow. Even like there's guys hang out together so if you know one, you know a couple of the other players.

[Anthony DeVito]

Very possible, man.

[Nick Swardson]

Like I. I got a cool ass Snapple Fact.

[Anthony DeVito]

That was the one. That was the first thing she. Because I never. The deal we made when I found out about it because I had been doing stand up for a couple years. The deal we made is she was like, you know, you now know these things you do. You cannot talk about this on stage. She was like, that was her big thing. And that when she told me that I tried it at a creek open mic under the guise of like. You know what I mean? Like that's kind of weird.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh man. I was probably drunk in the audience. I was like, what's the veto fucking talking about?

[Anthony DeVito]

This is so sad. I tried it because I thought I had a premise that merited. I was too excited. I just thought it was so funny that the other side of the coin of that would be like. Well maybe in my head like what if all Italian like what if all crime bosses went to all christenings like college scouts show up to high school. That's crossing.

[Nick Swardson]

That's really funny.

[Anthony DeVito]

So yeah, I was like, I gotta try that.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. They go, what do you got today? Johnny goes, I gotta go to seven. Christmas, I gotta drive spotted orange down here. There's so much water getting poured on these fucking kids. But hey, we gotta build our ranks.

[Anthony DeVito]

The percentile of pinsergrip on this baby.

[Nick Swardson]

I'm telling you right now, if I see one more baby penis, I'm gonna vamout. That is so. But like that's cool. Yeah. Because sometimes your mom tells a story where you go and maybe that made you a lot cooler.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

One time my mom, when I was in high school, she was like, we were talking about something and she. They were talking about living in San Francisco in the 70s and she just offhandedly. One of those. She goes, man, one time me and your dad did coke that was so clean, he wanted to go dancing. And I went, what a cool ass.

[Anthony DeVito]

Oh, my God. That's like a lyric.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. I was like. Like, oh, what. What do you mean, clean coat? Because it was 70, so this was like, clean. And you're like, damn, Trish, that's. Y' all are. Y' all are doing Rails. And my dad's like, let's go down to Broadway. There's some clubs I wouldn't mind getting into. I think that's wild. So with the cool stuff kind of filtering in, does that help or hurt the rel. The like you trying to figure out your dad. Because sometimes the cool stuff can take away from you. Realizing who he was. Is the complicated bits of humanity.

[Anthony DeVito]

I think it kind of just rounds them out the way most people feel. Like you were saying about your own father. I think there's not a person I've ever met, especially in comedy, who doesn't have a complicated relationship with their father.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah. Because if they didn't, they would just be at an office being funny. Exactly. They wouldn't find this need to fill this hole that we all need to fill.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

All of us.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So there isn't one comic that I know that's worth their soul.

[Anthony DeVito]

Who would risk. Who would risk being this vulnerable in

[Nick Swardson]

front of strangers, Getting embarrassed. When it goes bad, it's embarrassing. Especially, you know, when it's bad. You've seen some true psychos get off and go, that was great. You go, you bombed, dude.

[Anthony DeVito]

Especially the way that, you know, for the most part, we're doing it too.

[Nick Swardson]

Where it's just.

[Anthony DeVito]

It's confessional. So when they don't laugh, you've just. You've just told a sad thing for no reason.

[Nick Swardson]

I've told that this story on this podcast about bombing on Nick at night's mom's night out.

[Anthony DeVito]

Sure.

[Nick Swardson]

Where I called my mom a, and it just went so bad. And I didn't call her A. I just said she dated.

[Anthony DeVito]

Right.

[Nick Swardson]

But they took it as that. And these moms didn't like it. And it was so bad that I went to a bar and got drunk and called my mom still with stage makeup on. And I went, am I. Am I wrong for doing these jokes? And my mom went, no, If I put you through this them and you can make it funny.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Then it's green light. Yeah. Which is some real. Trish. I know. She listens some real. And it was like, for real, like, helped me. Yeah, because you go, okay, then. Because it's embarrassing.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

You're talking about your life and it bombs.

[Anthony DeVito]

You're so alone.

[Nick Swardson]

So when you start after the. After you Google, after you talk to your mom about it, at what point in your life where you go, I'm gonna dig in further and I really want to find out.

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, I think it was late 30s when I didn't like that. I just didn't like that I had this part of me that I had to withhold from. Like, you know, with especially.

[Nick Swardson]

Is this after you're engaged or before you're engaged?

[Anthony DeVito]

This is before I'm engaged. Okay, so. But especially in comedy where it's like, man, everybody is just being so open and vulnerable, like about who they are offstage and on stage. And I felt I didn't like having this one part of me that I couldn't share. And I think, I just, I think in my head I was like, there's enough history in the rear view here. And I think too, I was like, I think I'll be able to talk about it from a place of respect and ability. I think earlier on in comedy, I was very aware that I was like, this is probably the most unique thing about me. And I. You want to talk about those things because that's going to garner the most interest and be the most compelling. But I think I knew I would. Didn't know how to.

[Nick Swardson]

And I think, yeah, that's a very important tool. I think for, you know, I'm always speaking about comedy is like, when you see guys especially like open mic level or lower level, where you go, that premise is. That's a. That's out of your pay grade. Yeah, you can't handle that. You know, I came up at the time where Stan Hope was real big and he's one of the greatest of all time. And you'd go to open mics and you'd see a lot of guys trying to be Stanhope, and it's like, brother, I don't think you can break down the Iraq war in three minutes. I don't think your blood for oil bit's gonna go well in three minutes. Stanhope is a 25 year vet at this time.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

He's hand. And he's also one of the best that ever did it. You kind of see that. You'd see people try to be Bill Hicks or Doug Stanhope and you go, you can't do it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So that's smart that you were like, let me find out More about this

[Anthony DeVito]

before I. Yeah, I think that was it. Let me find out more so I can round out everything.

[Nick Swardson]

Sure.

[Anthony DeVito]

Because. And then I tried to do it as just like a chunk. And it was just too. I could feel audiences being like. Like, this is too complicated to just unpack. It's just like a chunk. So then that's when I developed it as a. A one man show.

[Nick Swardson]

When you do the one man show at the time titled My dad is is not Danny was there. Did the people from that world find out about.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, so.

[Nick Swardson]

So they did.

[Anthony DeVito]

So. Yeah. And. And I was saying this to sort of be like, that's when the digging deeper for. It was for the sake of myself. But it coincided with doing the show and that's when like the digging deeper came and that's when I read the book that is about my family. So a couple years into it, I was doing a show at St. Mark's I don't know, a couple years ago did. The show was fine. I think it was a New York comedy festival show. A couple weeks later, I'm driving with my mom and she was like, oh, they sent a guy to check out the show. And that was terrifying.

[Nick Swardson]

What did that feel like when you.

[Anthony DeVito]

I mean, I was freaked, man. I. That. And she always. She always. And it was like a sentence, a phrase. And then it was kind of stuck with me where she was like, you know, it. It's this life of glamour. It is all these things. We sat at the best table. It is like very much like she would describe their first date. It was just like the scene in Goodfellows with Henry Hill. Exactly, man. It's exactly that.

[Nick Swardson]

It's. I mean, it's not funny, but it kind of is that like you go from that and then it's just like you're just in the burbs of New Jersey. But you have like Ray Liotta Goodfellow voice where you go. And that's us rollerblading. There were guys that were afraid to gr. I was never really afraid to go goofy foot on a pole. Like 90s shit. And this is when the X Games are going on. What you have to understand about the X Games is nothing's more extreme than an assassin for a family doing that really. It's like Ray Liotta, but suburbs. Because you're the end of Goodfellas where he goes the call Ketchup, pasta, sauce. Out here, everything's. Yeah. That's like your mom's life once your dad's killed.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, it's the Karen monologue. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Or the voiceover. Yeah, so. So, yeah, they sent someone.

[Nick Swardson]

That's so scary.

[Anthony DeVito]

It was super scary.

[Nick Swardson]

But you also wonder. You go, what parts did you laugh at?

[Anthony DeVito]

Well, that's this. Yeah. So. So, you know, the whole, like, week after. Because I was looking over my shoulder, I was doing all the things that she would talk about here. Did cu. When you're. You know what I mean, when you're worried about your own well being, did

[Nick Swardson]

you catch yourself doing that?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, man.

[Nick Swardson]

You went, holy. It is, it's.

[Anthony DeVito]

I was. And I. I was petrified. And it got a glimpse of like, it takes a certain amount of constitution to live like that. And I was like, I can't live like. Like, I live six days of this.

[Nick Swardson]

You're calling in your spots but covering your mouth. You go, I doing STM available Thursday, Friday, Saturday, smoking a cigarette. You go, what's it? What's going on? You guys got to show the.

[Anthony DeVito]

Scanning the crowd for gold chains. Yeah, man, it was.

[Nick Swardson]

Did. Did they ever introduce themselves after seeing the show?

[Anthony DeVito]

They never introduced themselves, but.

[Nick Swardson]

So they only had contact with your mom?

[Anthony DeVito]

They had contact with my mom. And then that's why I asked. I was like, well, what did they think? And she goes, well, not bad. Which, yeah, I was kind of.

[Nick Swardson]

He's like a New York Times critic. Yeah, yeah. It's like when I find out Jason Zinn watched one of my sets and I go, go. He didn't hate it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. All right.

[Nick Swardson]

Okay.

[Anthony DeVito]

That is how it felt.

[Nick Swardson]

Cuz this guy could kill me.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. The stakes of doing this are so drastically different that I was like, probably will take.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah, you don't mind bad reviews.

[Anthony DeVito]

Awesome.

[Nick Swardson]

You go, I got a guy that gave me a good review. That'll break your thumbs.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't mind three stars on the Guardian.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah, yeah. The British have no idea what their fucking rating system is. You go to Fringe and you go, fuck you.

[Anthony DeVito]

So. So I think on their end and you know, obviously I think there was concern that I would be angry that it would be like you would besmirch them. I would besmirch them. I would be naming names. I would be handling this differently. I think they, you know, they were happy with this. The lens through which this was being told.

[Nick Swardson]

So the way, I don't know, happy,

[Anthony DeVito]

but like, at least, like, it wasn't disrespectful. It wasn't just.

[Nick Swardson]

If I. If I've learned anything from mob movies, it's the disrespect that gets you in trou.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So they felt it was respectful.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes. And. But that was also my mom's doing. Because that was my. My feelings was. It was never the intent. The intention was never the intention of this was to like process these difficult feelings and honestly tell my mom's story. Just because like the story of me finding out is in there as well. But like more so it's my mom's story and what that looks like from the perspective of a wife of one. Like what if the Sopranos was just

[Nick Swardson]

Carmelo Sopranos after the scene in the restaurant goes blast.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

If it picks up with Carmelo and Tony was killed.

[Anthony DeVito]

Exactly, exactly.

[Nick Swardson]

Then you're going from the thing of like. Yeah, how does. How does. You know. How do these people all react?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. What's the aftermath of that? So that's what I thought was interesting as like a movie. You know what I mean was like, hey, we don't ever see when that camera fades to black. These people's lives carry on and what that looks like.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

So that was the idea of it.

[Nick Swardson]

I love that.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Because I always feel like they should especially do that with romcoms. I don't give a. That they kissed at the airport. What happens eight months in when she doesn't like the fact that he's so into the packers. You know, like. Like the show real relationship. I don't want to see them kiss cuz they realize they're both cute.

[Anthony DeVito]

He's wearing a Jordan love jersey to meet my parents.

[Nick Swardson]

I can't take it. I can't take it. We're a Lions family.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. So that was the intention of the show was always that. So. So I think and. But I knew how serious it was and is. So it was all written with my mom. So like anything like she checked it. She's checked. She's looked over the Google. Do you know what I mean? Like she's had her hands in it just even to be like. Don't use that word. Use this word. Really don't say that.

[Nick Swardson]

Like that hands on.

[Anthony DeVito]

That hands on. Yeah. And like her being like, hey, I know you need a detail here. But like use a different year. Like there are things in the show take you off. To take you off the trail. So. So. And I bet.

[Nick Swardson]

I bet they like. They go, he's just like his dad. Guy ain't gonna fucking rat on nobody. I give it three meatballs and I have a bottle of wine. I give it two tables of rails. Whoa. You can't even fucking get a Seat there. I got three guys in the Hudson rivers could use more little act outs. That's fucking insane. Do you ever worry about them contacting you?

[Anthony DeVito]

No. And I've had con if anything, like, I think, because like I said, I don't know and I don't want to speak at a turn in terms of like, these are people that have tried to come out from under this, you know, know. So, like, I've had contact with them, but just from the sense of like them being like, I think maybe years ago they might have heard me talk about an Ari's podcast years ago. So I, I, I think they were like, no, we've, we've, we've seen baby pictures of you. We know about you. Like, this was, we also had to deal with this. You know what I mean?

[Nick Swardson]

Well, they lost the guy that they

[Anthony DeVito]

loved is their uncle. You know what I mean?

[Nick Swardson]

That they loved, that they knew and that these dead.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. So the contact I've had with them has been like, super, like, hey, we're cousins who don't know each other and maybe this is a way in the future that we'll be able to connect. And like, everyone's older now. You know what I mean? Everyone's older now. They have their own lives. I have my own. Like, no one's trying to, you know, infiltrate each other's business in that way. And then if there are people involved, it's like, I think I've been pretty candid about, like, this isn't going nowhere near you. And there have been been opportunities that have arisen which could have. And I've reached out to them to be like, hey, so and so this could be happening. What's your say on this? Oh, that's, yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

So you've done that.

[Anthony DeVito]

I've done that.

[Nick Swardson]

You've reached out and gone. So and so is interested in this.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Is that okay?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes.

[Nick Swardson]

Have they gone? No.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yes, they have.

[Nick Swardson]

They've said absolutely not.

[Anthony DeVito]

They said, absolutely not.

[Nick Swardson]

And I went, what a way to turn down something where you go, you know, that idea we had ain't gonna happen. And they go, so soon. You go, people, that'll make you.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

How can I put this politely? Take you off this earth. I think the best way I could say this is you won't be around. This isn't a. Because that's what's funny about the, the world that you're describing is filled with respect and danger in a very real way. Respect isn't tossed around. It's not this idea of. And then you're going with the fakest business on the planet. Yeah. Where you have people that are just trying to prove that they're valuable in any way, shape or form. In some ways a lot more cutthroat than that business.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Where they just go, like, I need this. I'll kick you under the bus, right. To have those people to go. Because when I don't want to do something, they go, why don't you want to do something? And you go, because I just don't think it's, I don't like it. I don't think it'll be this. But they go, well, because I don't. I'll get killed. And they go, okay.

[Anthony DeVito]

It's, it's like having kids and canceling plans.

[Nick Swardson]

Yeah.

[Anthony DeVito]

You know what I mean? Like, you have this like built in thing that just trumps everything that there's no argument.

[Nick Swardson]

So.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. So that, Yeah, I, I just, Yeah, I, I, it's always like they have to be informed. You check in, I check in.

[Nick Swardson]

If it's something that's cool. I know it's scary and dangerous, but can I just say is someone that doesn't have to live through it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Very cool. Yeah, Very cool that that's who you check in with.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

I had to check in with a family of alcoholics that all got wiped off the plate. My mom's family's fine. My dad, him, he's all dead. There's two of us. And I go, hey, Lisa, can I talk about this? And she goes, I don't give a. And you go, yeah, they're all dead. I guess one of my last questions is, is did it, how much did it change the way you look at your mom? Like as far as like, damn, mom, just a hot lady dating a mobster. Cool ass mom.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah. Certain things that re, like, it reinforced certain things like, like, because you know, much like, you know, Henry Hill Goodfell, like where it's like, yeah, he gave her gifts, coats, look the other way. You know, she looked the other way. So it's like, it gave me a real like deep sense of her vanity in that way. You know what I mean?

[Nick Swardson]

Where it's like, did it make you think she was a hot girl or you go, oh, you were like kind of like a hot girl. No, like a Jersey hot.

[Anthony DeVito]

No, I watched some of the hot. Yes. That's crazy.

[Nick Swardson]

It's destroy your life.

[Anthony DeVito]

Destroy your life. Wouldn't stand a chance.

[Nick Swardson]

Oh, wake up with a gun in your face. Just like Goodfellas. Get out of here.

[Anthony DeVito]

Growing up as a kid in jerk, surrounded by them, knowing they will have nothing to do with you, but still wanting them, it was the worst.

[Nick Swardson]

But also what's crazy is knowing that you have the pedigree. Most of those women, if they would have known that at the time, they would have kicked their lug hip boyfriends. So they go, do you know who that is?

[Anthony DeVito]

Right? And they would have been like, what's it like to date one of those guys who'd be like, we watch a lot of Frasier.

[Nick Swardson]

I don't. He says, the writing is tight. I don't get it. Now if your mom's watching this, please turn this off. Because they have a question that would probably hurt a feeling. Did you ever find out about a guma or like a. Yeah, I mean,

[Anthony DeVito]

she said, like, she said, you know, she said it without saying that that existed. She was just like, yeah, he had his life, she respected.

[Nick Swardson]

She knew the score.

[Anthony DeVito]

She knew the score in that way. But it has like, in another way, it, it makes everything, like all the, the faults that my mom had, like, it gives me so much more patience with them. Any of her paranoia, any of her fear, like whenever I was out with friends, like she, you know, you know, I mean, during this podcast, my phone's buzzed like four times.

[Nick Swardson]

Like, do you think it's her?

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah, undoubtedly it's her. It's her. Greg.

[Nick Swardson]

Every time. Greg's the man. And also Greg, text like that, like a mom that's worried about you. Yeah. Greg is one of my favorite human beings on the planet. What I like about it is, and I've just known you for years. We've came up together at the creek. I've just known, you know, this isn't your personality. And I mean that in a compliment. It's like a lot of people would have taken something like this and made it their entire personality, everything they talk about. In fact, we've done a whole podcast episode. And I feel bad that people don't see another flavor of you because you're such a fantastic comic. Your special still balling out on YouTube right now. Go watch it.

[Anthony DeVito]

Straight hooping.

[Nick Swardson]

Straight hooping. I thought it was still balls. You're straight.

[Anthony DeVito]

You're good, dude.

[Nick Swardson]

But go watch, watch. And we're gonna put the link in the YouTube video if you're watching it. Anthony is a phenomenal stand up comic. So what I think about this situation is you're so funny and then you have this added thing where I go, well, now I want to see how he breaks down this Thing being funny.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

And I, I'm excited to see Jersey Boy with Sam Morrill producing. It is, I think, fantastic.

[Anthony DeVito]

Yeah.

[Nick Swardson]

Are you gonna be doing a live run of it?

[Anthony DeVito]

So I've been doing. Because it's just hard to do a one man show all the time. Sure. Like, I'm trying to get it ready to tape by the end of the year. So I've taken all the jokes out. I mean, it's less compelling, but like I've. The jokes are like a 25 minute chunk, basically. So I've been doing those as just like a chunk on the road. So there is at least like surface level. I am talking about it just to get the jokes tight. But there's no. I don't have any dates in the works of like doing the show as a whole. But I will hopefully be taping it by the end of the year. Somewhere next year.

[Nick Swardson]

When you tape it, let me know. We'll come back on and we will talk everything that isn't about the mob. Well, we'll have you on to promote that and we won't talk any organized crime. We'll talk straight up. Nick's love basketball. Taco. Shout out Taco. Hope you're still good. Is he still around?

[Anthony DeVito]

Taco's good.

[Nick Swardson]

Taco's the man. Scientist. Yeah. I love a scientist named Taco. Nick. Dave named Taco. Anthony devito. Anthony devito. Follow him on Instagram, whatever you do. He's so funny. And also just like a great dude. And I appreciate you coming by because I had all these questions.

[Anthony DeVito]

No.

[Nick Swardson]

And after Greg was like, edited that and then you went, dude, I'll come on and talk about it. I was like, oh, that's fantastic. Because a lot I would have just edited it and never brought it up. And I would have. So for those people watching, they know I would have been respectful. I'm always about respect. Pimp's gonna call me and go, I got a call from a guy, we gotta pull that whole episode. And I'm gonna go, don't do it. It's turning out that shout. Anthony DeVito, he's the man. Thanks for coming by, dude.

[Anthony DeVito]

Thank you.

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