Wired & Tired | Son of a Boy Dad #398

Summary

Son of a Boy Dad #398: “Wired & Tired” | May 5, 2026

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OVERVIEW: THEME & PURPOSE

This episode finds the crew in peak post-travel disarray. Lil Sasquatch, having recently dropped out of college, leans on his producer Rone and friends for guidance (and some much-needed comic perspective) on his attempts to “become a man”—or at least get a functional worldview. The conversation weaves through airport mishaps, sleep deprivation, moving pains, and the search for meaning (and furniture) in adult life, all with the group’s signature blend of self-deprecation, inside-jokes, and bone-dry wit.

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KEY DISCUSSION POINTS & INSIGHTS

1. Travel Chaos & Stand-Up Gigs

• Dave’s Wild Weekend:
  • Rental car return drama in San Francisco, near-disaster with airport spikes.
  • Last-minute show with Bert Kreischer—described the hilarity and cluster of nearly missing everything.
  • “I got back in the car... wanted to just drive over those spikes.” – Dave (04:26)
• Encounters in Hotel Gyms:
  • Dave stumbles into Kreischer and team mid-circuit; discusses Bert’s transformation: “Bert’s in the best shape I’ve ever seen him in.” (06:17)
  • Speculates about Bert’s supplement regime; has a running joke about “roided nipples.”

2. On Performing & Comedy Circuits

• Performing at large venues (2,500-seaters), nerves, and “practice reps” before hitting bigger venues.
  • “Chappelle Lacy went before me…” Dave (09:33)
  • Discussion of legendary Comedy Store lineups: “Is that a heavy hitter lineup or a heavy Hitler lineup?” – Francis (10:25)
  • The "playbook" of building up to bigger rooms, learned from seasoned comics.

3. Travel Comfort, Sleep Aids, and Sleep Chaos

• Flights: Red eyes, “premium comfort” class, and the disappointment of narrowly missing an upgrade.
• Let Me Sleep Gummies:
  • Tales of restless, fragmented sleep despite taking two.
  • “I slept in stages of five minutes for five hours.” – Dave (19:53)
  • Discussion on the uselessness of pharmaceuticals vs. just "raw dogging" flights.

4. Daily Life Mishaps & Moving Logistics

• Rone’s moving saga:
  • Anxiety about the cost, relief at “only $500” for movers.
  • Tipping etiquette and the notorious phenomenon of “lost” packages in NYC walk-ups.
  • Hilarious confusion when a junk removal company claims to have "chopped up his couch" while he’s still sitting on it. (46:27)
• Dave’s own classic: disputes with landlords, security deposit woes, faked insurance claims. (48:26)

5. Urban Life & Uber Rants

• Vibes in San Francisco:
  • “Every time I go, I'm like, this is the most remarkable city in America.” – Dave (38:11)
  • Homelessness in various cities—contextualizing the narrative versus reality.
• Uber driver confessional:
  • The existential toll on drivers, traffic stress and "cortisol spikes" (29:32)
  • “You’ve got to be on his side… It's your duty as the passenger.” – Francis (26:55)
  • Strategies for surviving (and supporting) stressed drivers.

6. Sleep, Wired/Tired, and Body Image Laughs

• Extended riffing on “wired but tired,” cortisol, and self-diagnosed health problems.
  • “I might just be fat.” – Ron (30:43)
  • “Now keep it clean though. You’re gonna keep your new spot clean...” – Francis (52:16)

7. Furniture Shopping & Adult Purchases

• Endless debate on couches and the value proposition of bean bags, boneless couches, Wayfair vs. Amazon logistics.
  • “What if I get the boneless couch?” – Ron (53:10)
  • Group consensus: go Wayfair for real delivery, or risk the beanbag lifestyle.

8. Culture Shocks & NYC Characters

• Poles vs. Irish vs. Italians in New York—“backbone” ethnicities and their stereotypes.
• Building super anecdotes and speculation on a complex package theft ring.

9. Barstool/Workplace Insider Stories

• Security guard “Dan” allegedly chugging hand sanitizer and mumbling the N-word—a satirical segment lampooning office rumors.
• Recap of Max’s bachelor party in Vegas and inside Barstool banter about bachelor party crews.

10. Sports: NBA Playoffs

• Celtics-Sixers: Anger, betrayal, and venting after a devastating Boston playoff loss.
  • "Just made me mad, dude. I, I, you know... The Celtics matter to me." – Dave (63:00)

11. Diseases Named After People

• Lou Gehrig’s, Magic Johnson, Legionnaire’s—comedic speculation about disease name origins.
  • “What disease would you guys want named after you?” – Dave (64:46)
  • "Covid." – Ron (64:53)
  • “What if diarrhea became Settles' Disease?” – Dave (65:03)

12. Fan Encounters & Gaming

• 13-year-old Son of a Boy Dad fan challenges Dave at a golf resort—claims to be a day trader.
  • “I’m like, dude, you’re 13. Like, there can’t be too many 13-year-olds [listening].” – Dave (70:03)
• Long tangent about video gaming, PC setups, “League of Legends,” and the sleep habits of Jerry and Numbers.

13. Food Debates

• Pringles vs. Kettle Chips:
  • The logistics, consistency, and art of snack consumption.
  • “Pringles, you're getting how many chips we think is in a Pringles?” – Francis (84:53)
  • Emergency Pringle stashes, clean-ness of chips, and the tragedy of upside-down Pringles.

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MEMORABLE QUOTES BY TIMESTAMP

• On Airport Spikes:

  • "This is the closest I've ever come in my entire life to driving the wrong way across the metal spikes." – Dave [04:17]

• On ‘Wired but Tired’

  • "You feeling wired but tired." – Ron [29:23]
  • "I'm not a disaster. I am the itchiest guy alive." – Dave [29:42]

• On Comedy Lineups:

  • “Is that a heavy hitter lineup or a heavy Hitler lineup?” – Francis [10:25]

• On Self-Awareness:

  • “I think I might just be fat.” – Ron [30:43]

• On City Stereotypes:

  • "Every time I go, I'm like, this is the most remarkable city in America." – Dave [38:11]

• On Sleep Chaos:

  • “I slept in stages of five minutes for five hours.” – Dave [19:53]

• On New York Moving:

  • "I think there's some whole interconnections that I didn't know about, therefore leading to me to believe that they were stealing my packages. I really think they were." – Ron [45:05]

• On Disease Naming Rights:

  • “What disease would you guys want named after you that currently exists?” – Dave [64:46]
  • "Covid." – Ron [64:53]
  • “What if diarrhea became Settles' Disease?” – Dave [65:03]

TIMESTAMPS FOR IMPORTANT SEGMENTS

• Travel & Airport Spikes: [02:13]-[05:11]
• Bert Kreischer in the Gym: [06:12]-[07:12]
• Premium Comfort Seat Tales: [13:09]-[14:46]
• Let Me Sleep Gummies Experience: [19:24]-[20:22]
• Golden Gate Bridge & Suicide Nets: [31:00]-[34:11]
• San Francisco & City Stereotypes: [38:11]-[39:16]
• Uber Drivers' Mental Health, Cortisol: [25:31]-[29:16]
• Moving Out & Package Theft Stories: [44:12]-[45:05]
• Furniture & Bean Bag Couch Discussion: [53:03]-[54:36]
• Security Guard Drinking Hand Sanitizer (Satirical): [56:47]-[57:55]
• Bachelor Party & Barstool Insider: [60:15]-[61:08]
• Celtics Loss Rant & NBA Playoffs: [61:28]-[63:15]
• Disease Name Riffs: [64:03]-[66:51]
• 13-Year-Old Fan Golf Contest: [69:35]-[72:29]
• Pringles/Food Debate: [81:02]-[85:16]
• League of Legends/New Video Games: [86:36]-[87:54]

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FINAL REMARKS

This episode is a classic “hang” with the Son of a Boy Dad crew—effortlessly blending ridiculous life stories, urban malaise, self-satire, and deep-dive cultural riffs (with a side of sports heartbreak and snack food analysis). It’s an immersive ride for fans new and old, reassuring everyone that even if you’re out of college and feeling lost, laughing with your boys is a pretty good place to land.

Transcript

[Francis Ellis]

Hey. Son of a boy. Dad. Listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube Prime. Members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.

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[Ron]

The best thing that we are sponsored that barstool does is Phoenix.

[Dave]

Start there.

[Francis Ellis]

And no. And no bull. It's the only shoes that I wear outside of today. I wear no bulls every single day.

[Ron]

It's that. That's an old one, isn't it?

[Francis Ellis]

It's brand new.

[Dave]

Oh, they were at. No, they were doing. They did the writer cup with us.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I was thinking of.

[Francis Ellis]

Tripoli, probably.

[Ron]

You know it's new for you.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, yeah, I just got on board and I'm pretty psyched about it. Thank you guys for having me super fired up about it. My nobles. I wore some nobles with a suit this past weekend. Really?

[Ron]

Yeah. That's class.

[Francis Ellis]

Just around the house for the derby.

[Dave]

Damn.

[Francis Ellis]

How was the flight? You were with Bert. Yeah, yeah, of course. Of course.

[Dave]

Yeah, I was in San Francisco all weekend. And then.

[Francis Ellis]

Fresh.

[Dave]

Well, no, I was doing my own shows and then I got up, I got to the airport to drop off my rental car and I pulled all the way up to the stop sign and got out of my car. In fact, they scanned the barcode. Oh, yeah, you're done. And then Brandon called me because he Runs my Instagram was like, you just got a message from Bert Kreischer asking if you were in San Francisco.

[Ron]

Damn.

[Dave]

And so then I got his. Bert's number, and I was like, what's up? I'm heading out. And he's like, let me know if you want to hop on the show tonight. So I got back in the car.

[Ron]

And they let you take the car?

[Dave]

They didn't know.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[Dave]

And I got to the place where you like your agreement to them, and you're like. And the guy was like, wait a minute. It says that you return this. And I was like, that seems to be a glitch. What do you mean?

[Ron]

How would I have returned it if I'm in it?

[Dave]

I was told. Yeah, I was like. I was told I had until the end of the night. And they were like, well, technically you do, but okay, man. They figured it out. But get this. I somehow, because of that, I was now on the. The rental. The return area is not on the same floor of the parking garage at SFO as the exit the alum. I was on Alamo.

[Francis Ellis]

So you had to jump it.

[Dave]

I had to go to. They were like, you need to go exit on a different floor where the Alamo office is. And I was like, okay. And he go. He goes, go out here, go right and then go right. And I did. And I got a little confused. No, keep paying attention.

[Ron]

Well, I don't know what that was.

[Dave]

Like, Wiffle ball sitting up at attention.

[Francis Ellis]

I'm getting engaged. I'm leaning.

[Ron]

Bunch of toys just fell out of Rhone's pockets.

[Francis Ellis]

I'm having a good time, bro.

[Dave]

This is the closest I've ever come in my entire life to driving the wrong way across the metal spikes.

[Ron]

Oh, that would have been bad.

[Francis Ellis]

Smashed out.

[Dave]

And the guy got out of his little booth and he goes, no, no. Because I was like, 150 yards away. He's like, no, no, no, no. Next ride. Next ride. And I gotta tell you, I really wanted.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, it would have been awesome.

[Dave]

I wanted to just. I wondered if my. My tires would, like, hiss quietly or explode.

[Ron]

No, I think it's a dramatic.

[Francis Ellis]

I think it'd be like.

[Dave]

Yeah, it's such a menacing threat.

[Ron]

I mean, they're driving right into the spikes. Hooks.

[Dave]

Yeah. And the sign says, do not go forward. Extreme vehicle damage will occur. Extreme.

[Francis Ellis]

That's so nuts. I guess that's what they got to do because the keys are in the car. But if you had just drove out and they came up to you and they're like, sir, you just ruined this car. And you. You could have just been like, I returned this. I returned this car three hours ago. Check the system.

[Ron]

How am I even in it?

[Francis Ellis]

I'm not even.

[Dave]

No one saw me.

[Francis Ellis]

I was never here.

[Ron]

I was supposed to be in this car in the first place.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, that's on you.

[Ron]

How could I have destroyed it?

[Francis Ellis]

That is. You found the perfect loophole to destroy a car at the airport.

[Dave]

Yeah, So I. I drove back into the city, and then I still had an hour until my hotel room expired. Yeah, I just went back to my

[Francis Ellis]

hotel, got back in bed.

[Dave]

Well, I hadn't checked out. And admittedly, I. I should have checked out, but this was lucky that I hadn't. And I took a bag straight to the gym, like, literally with my gym outfit. And I walked into the tiny hotel gym with my roller bag and I walked straight into Bert Kreischer.

[Ron]

Oh, damn.

[Dave]

Who was working out in the gym with his, like, team.

[Francis Ellis]

Wow.

[Ron]

Do they have it closed off? Do they have, like, a roped off area?

[Dave]

No, but they were doing, like, a circuit workout.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, my God. Imagine seeing the machine in the body.

[Ron]

That's like. This is like your. Your dream scenario, Is it hopping in on a circuit?

[Dave]

Oh, yes. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Just towards school.

[Ron]

If I work in.

[Dave]

Yeah. Well, the guy was like, you're seven.

[Ron]

You.

[Dave]

You missed. You miss being part of this by seven minutes. I'll catch up. I said that. I literally said that. I was like, back filming. Film me from the back. Film me from the back, boys. And then I just started working next to them. But Bert's in the best shape I've ever seen him in his life. He said he's in the best shape that he's been in in many.

[Ron]

See on roids.

[Francis Ellis]

His peptide stack has to be insane

[Ron]

because he was hitting the roids pretty hard last time I spoke to him.

[Dave]

Was he.

[Ron]

He was on the yak. Yeah, he came on the yak and he was like. Remember he said he was taking them?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Or testosterone, maybe.

[Francis Ellis]

Maybe testosterone.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

He looks like lean and muscular would be the way I would put it. Natty.

[Francis Ellis]

He's probably a natty ga. Could be natty.

[Ron]

That sounds natty.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

How do his nipples look? Like he's been using testosterone.

[Dave]

They looked puffy, like he's been milked.

[Ron]

That's if they're looking puffy.

[Dave]

Look, far be it for you to give anyone nipple shame. I've seen those fucking saucers you got.

[Ron]

You've never seen my nipples.

[Dave]

I've seen.

[Ron]

And the ones that are online are not real. They're fake nipples.

[Dave]

Oh, that's what anyone would say. Who's had.

[Ron]

Those are stickers.

[Dave]

You've been leaked. You had a vengeful ex leak your

[Francis Ellis]

nipple picks and then you had to. You tried to walk the market with different size nipple. Wait, who's bro next to you? What the hell is that? Nas X.

[Dave]

That's Nas.

[Francis Ellis]

Why does little Nas X come on. Oh, shirtless threaded little Nas X shirtless little Sass X.

[Dave]

More like little Gas X. You know what I mean? Look at those pepperonis.

[Francis Ellis]

I'm fixated on Nas X. Why didn't you do your bulge like Nas X?

[Ron]

I know. I should have.

[Francis Ellis]

Should have sculpted the bul.

[Ron]

Get the tighty whities on. It's crazy how many shirtless photos of Lil Nas X come up when you look up.

[Dave]

Me?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. What the.

[Ron]

It's nuts.

[Francis Ellis]

Are you named after him?

[Ron]

Yes. I was a fan from the jump back when he was doing Nicki Minaj. Back when he was a Nicki Minaj fan page. That's when I became a.

[Francis Ellis]

What the fuck is my Nicki Minaj fan page rapping for? Give me Minaj.

[Ron]

Oh, man.

[Francis Ellis]

How was the set? Was it sick? What was it? What was the cap?

[Dave]

2500 was the theater.

[Ron]

Were you nervous? Yeah, Yeah, I would have been.

[Dave]

Yeah, I was. I haven't done. I haven't done a room that big in a long time.

[Francis Ellis]

Honestly, though, that's just the community looking out for itself. Because you getting in front of 2500 before you go and do the garden, you know, you want to be building and building rooms.

[Ron]

That's exactly what I said to him.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, that's what Rogan and said.

[Ron]

This is going to be a hell

[Francis Ellis]

of a rep. That's their playbook down in Dallas. Yeah, perfect rep. How did it go?

[Dave]

It went well. Chappelle Lacy went before me and he.

[Ron]

That was in a different direction, Dave.

[Dave]

Yeah, no, they wouldn't.

[Ron]

It's about to be like. Well, you forgot to mention that.

[Dave]

All right, we're going to go David and then Francis.

[Ron]

We're going to make this as hard for Francis as we possibly can.

[Dave]

David has to catch a flight. No, he doesn't. That flight leaves when he wants it to.

[Francis Ellis]

Now we're going to have David and then Francis and then Jerry.

[Ron]

I saw something for like, the. Did you see this, like, the Comedy Store lineup last night? I don't know if it was last night. Kanye.

[Dave]

Right.

[Ron]

It was like. It was like. It was like Shane Louis Chappelle, Kanye,

[Francis Ellis]

all written in at the end. Yeah, right after Jeff died.

[Ron]

Like they were like the drop ins.

[Dave]

What?

[Ron]

Yeah, it was like a full. You know, they do the full lineup and then. Yeah, like what Ron said, it's. It was written in at the bottom.

[Francis Ellis]

It was. Is that a heavy hitter lineup or a heavy Hitler lineup? I couldn't tell. Yeah, yeah, right here.

[Dave]

Wow, that's insane.

[Francis Ellis]

I think it's so much smaller potion stamp size. That's great. I wonder what it was on what that brother was doing, hopefully.

[Dave]

Honestly, what's his name did stand up. That great rapper that everyone loves.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, yes, yes.

[Dave]

Lil Nas x Toy Story or something. Was his album

[Ron]

Ty Dolla Sign?

[Dave]

No, not Ty Dolla Sign. You know that like, jazzy guy who's really, really good.

[Francis Ellis]

Key Glock.

[Ron]

Could have been store his black music soul child. Token.

[Dave]

No, it's not Token. I'm sorry. It's like. Honestly, I'm.

[Ron]

Token might be the funniest thing that could have come up there.

[Dave]

I'm too delirious to figure out the name, but you guys would know.

[Ron]

I know who you're talking about. I just don't remember the name right now.

[Francis Ellis]

Blue and Exile, you said?

[Ron]

No, it's like a very famous rapper.

[Dave]

Yes, super, super famous. Yeah, he's jazzy.

[Ron]

He's not jazzy. I don't know why you keep on saying that, but the jazz is definitely mixing people up front of me.

[Francis Ellis]

Toy Story album jazz. Randy Newman came up.

[Dave]

Maybe it's like Children's Story is the name of the album. No Closer. It's close to them. I think we would have a better chance. The rapper.

[Ron]

Oh, okay. There we go.

[Dave]

Is that who you thought I was talking about?

[Ron]

No, not who I was thinking of at all.

[Dave]

Coloring book. Golly. Don't ask. Don't expect much out of me, dude. I. So I did my set and then I immediately had to get in the car and I had to rush to the airport again.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah. Well, I have a question, though, and I don't want to. I'm sorry.

[Dave]

I've cut you off nine times by me finishing.

[Ron]

I've cut you off nine times.

[Francis Ellis]

But let's hear this question.

[Ron]

My question is, why didn't you just Uber back to the hotel? Wouldn't you? I feel like getting the car returned is like a good weight off the shoulders.

[Dave]

I had a lot of bags. I had golf clubs.

[Ron]

Oh, okay.

[Dave]

Because I had been in Oklahoma with foreplay.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah.

[Dave]

I went Oklahoma. San Francisco. I mean, I've been.

[Ron]

I Forgot about that.

[Dave]

Yeah, it's been a mess.

[Ron]

That's where the red eye. Really? You too? Because then it's just a tease getting home.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

You're like, I got to go right back out, dude.

[Dave]

I went to, so I went to the airport and then got on the plane and I was the number. I had used a regional upgrade certificate, so I was the number. I was in premium comfort or whatever, which I hadn't ever flown on that.

[Ron]

I don't think I have either.

[Dave]

And it was, it's nice. Spectacular.

[Francis Ellis]

Nice.

[Ron]

What is it?

[Francis Ellis]

It's like a lay down seat where you can't lay down. So it has all the amenities of a lay down seat. And it's a little bit Wider, but

[Dave]

it's 75 more recline than in coach. Oh, there's a foot rest that pops out. Very comfortable.

[Ron]

That sounds better than the bed.

[Dave]

Not gonna go that far. They said on the phone when I spoke to the lovely, lovely customer service reps to whom I give a five every single time. They're so good that I always give them five.

[Ron]

I thought you meant you tipped them.

[Francis Ellis]

I give them a five.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Send me your Venmo.

[Dave]

I send them $5.

[Francis Ellis]

I'd like to give you a five.

[Dave]

No, I, I, she had said it is akin to first class on like a regular flight on, on a non delta 1 flight. But it was way better.

[Ron]

Was this a new plane presumably? Yeah, must have been.

[Dave]

But it's the type of plane that goes to Europe.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And anyway, I was number one on, I was in that seat and then I was number one to be upgraded to Delta 1. And I got to the gate agents and I said, hi, I'm just wondering if I'm number one on the upgrade list. And I'm wondering if there's anyone who is not going to be in Delta 1 or not coming. And the guy was like, well, I don't want to speak too soon, but there is somebody who hasn't checked in yet. So this might just be your lucky day. And as he was finishing that sentence, that person checked in.

[Ron]

Damn, that's brutal. But you, you, you had to know who's just casually just skipping the Delta one.

[Dave]

It's, I don't know, I mean it's like a red eye. I guess I would wonder if the attrition rate on a red eye is lower or higher than a day flight. Probably lower would be my guess.

[Ron]

Nobody's probably, yeah, probably.

[Dave]

You have to get home. That's the reason you're taking the red eye.

[Ron]

Yeah, the only reason would be if someone decides to fly in the morning instead.

[Dave]

And that doesn't really. You have a bed. You're like, well, I don't need to.

[Ron]

Yeah, true, true.

[Dave]

So then I took Let Me Sleep Gummy in right when we took off.

[Francis Ellis]

Okay, that explains it.

[Ron]

Wait, what the.

[Francis Ellis]

I knew that there was something up, and I could tell that you're still off a Let Me Sleep Gummy?

[Dave]

Yeah, I had two of them.

[Francis Ellis]

You had two Let Me Sleep gummies?

[Dave]

Well, that's the dosage. That was the recommended dose.

[Francis Ellis]

That's the half. You're still in the half.

[Ron]

Life of a Let Me Sleep gummy.

[Dave]

Oh, you Let me sleep. Let me sleep. Let Me Sleep gummy. You'd probably know it as a edible or something.

[Ron]

Is it an edible?

[Francis Ellis]

No, they probably sell them at the airport.

[Ron]

Oh, you remember getting the tea. And I'm noticing there's no T at all in the spelling.

[Dave]

To be honest with you, I've never read the label.

[Ron]

Let Me Sleep slang. These are company.

[Dave]

I carry these loose in, like, a little package because my God damn fucking shampoo bottle blows up every single time I fly.

[Ron]

Is that the pressure in a bag?

[Dave]

Is that the pressure of the airport? Whoa, whoa.

[Francis Ellis]

The Let Me Sleep gummies? Yeah, it's woofing right now.

[Dave]

Is that the pressure of the airplane or like the.

[Francis Ellis]

I'll be honest, I fly with shampoo.

[Ron]

I've never flown with shampoo either.

[Francis Ellis]

I trust that it'll be where I'm going.

[Ron]

Yeah, shampoo is one of those ones. I don't really care. I'd use dawn.

[Dave]

Do you care more about your conditioner or your shampoo?

[Ron]

Yeah, the conditioner I travel with everywhere. I don't use conditioner at all. No, Never.

[Dave]

What?

[Ron]

Yeah, it makes my hair too soft and flat.

[Dave]

No wonder you got that perfect.

[Ron]

That perfect coif going.

[Dave]

You're acting like you're all fucking simple on your hair routine.

[Ron]

I know there's a lot. I never once acted like that.

[Dave]

There's a lot going on.

[Ron]

There's a ton.

[Dave]

There's a lot.

[Ron]

Hours.

[Dave]

Yes, yes.

[Ron]

And then people are like, why don't you just run a brush through your hair? And it's like, it'll look worse by a lot.

[Dave]

Yeah. You want me undo what took me hours to this controlled chaos?

[Ron]

This controlled chaos.

[Dave]

Old chaos again. Your hair looks amazing. It really does.

[Ron]

I don't know about that.

[Dave]

You got all these, like, disparate little threads at the top that, you know, it's like someone ran a balloon.

[Ron]

Exactly. Very Joe Burrow esque.

[Francis Ellis]

But if you start acknowledging too much how much time you put into it, it will lose its charm.

[Ron]

Exactly. We'll have to wipe all that.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, we have to nip this in the bud.

[Dave]

Now, I think that you probably dress the way that you do to even out how lovely your hair is.

[Ron]

That's what it is.

[Dave]

You're like, I don't want people thinking I'm, you know, a billionaire. I can't. If I show up with hair like this in a, in a, you know, millions, like, I'm gonna get robbed immediately.

[Francis Ellis]

It'll be like those videos when people first get to, like Mumbai. People are just pressed up against the glass, like trying to get a dollar off.

[Ron]

Those videos are insane.

[Francis Ellis]

We gotta get to Mumbai as a squad.

[Ron]

Some mackin on the window, clawing at it.

[Francis Ellis]

That sounds so nice. And like the drivers turned off the car.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah. Just sitting there as people are just rocking the boat

[Francis Ellis]

because the traffic's bad. We gotta get out to Mumbai. Do you guys crave going to India in your lifetime?

[Dave]

No, no, not really. The only thing I'm interested in is that people talk about the service there as if it's the best in the world.

[Francis Ellis]

Really? Yeah. It's probably because there's like slavery.

[Ron]

Yeah, probably. Yeah.

[Dave]

Like, like middle class people have a chef, a driver and two maids every day. Yeah, like every. They just are there.

[Ron]

Yeah. I don't have a huge interest in India, but I would go if the offer was right.

[Francis Ellis]

Well, guess what, brother, I'm offering you right now two round trip tickets to. To India.

[Ron]

Yeah, I mean, sure.

[Dave]

Curry week.

[Francis Ellis]

Curry week.

[Dave]

Curry.

[Ron]

I would definitely be down bringing Steph Curry.

[Francis Ellis]

Steph and Seth.

[Dave]

Yeah, we're going with the curry brothers.

[Francis Ellis]

Curry week would be so nice. Or at least interesting.

[Dave]

Yeah, it would. I bet Taz would get sick so fast you wouldn't even eat anything.

[Ron]

I think we all would get.

[Dave]

Harry would eat the food on the plane over and be like, oh my God, I have diarrhea. That was the Delta.

[Francis Ellis]

That was the Gouda.

[Dave]

That food in India really got to me. It's like, dude, we flew an American Airlines. I took these, let me sleeps. I sat down in my chair and I started to like nod off. And I'm not kidding you, dude, I slept in stages of five minutes for five hours.

[Ron]

Yeah, I've been there.

[Dave]

I mean, it was like sleep for five minutes, wake up, be like, wow, I wonder how long I was out for.

[Ron]

Oh, a minute.

[Dave]

Pull up the flight map. Five minutes has allowed you still see

[Francis Ellis]

the same town that you were passing.

[Ron]

The worst.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Dave]

I couldn't believe it. And I don't know if it was because the plane was jostling a little or because I didn't eat enough lemmings, but for whatever reason, I. It was the worst.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Fucking. I would rather have gotten bagel.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

I would rather have not slept a single minute.

[Ron]

I think honestly, the move might be taking nothing. I wonder, because when we flew to Birmingham, I mean, I took everything I could get my hands on and I didn't sleep for a second. Like, I took a concoction that's like you. Like if you woke, if you took that at noon, you would fall asleep. And it was like, it was like midnight and I was just eyes wide open.

[Dave]

Well, give us what you took.

[Francis Ellis]

He can't say probably.

[Ron]

I mean,

[Dave]

we know he's prescribed Ativan or whatever it is.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah. I took Klonopin. I took one Klonopin and I felt it like, as I was going on the plane. And then I sat down. It was like it I it out or something. Like it was. You beat a colon.

[Francis Ellis]

It was.

[Ron]

I beat it. It didn't take.

[Dave]

Yeah, you needed to chew it.

[Ron]

Klonopin also isn't like, it's never gonna have that same effect like that like a Xanax or like a Ativam would, because it's extended release. It lasts for like 12 hours.

[Francis Ellis]

You got a drink on it if you. If you really want. You really want to have some fun. You didn't activate it. You had the nozzle button in the car, but you just didn't press it.

[Dave]

Yeah, that's right. That's right.

[Ron]

I definitely thought about it, you know, up in the bed. Maybe I'll just get a drink.

[Francis Ellis]

And it would have been like the wolf of Wall street, like crawling into Birmingham. Well, I thought it was fine.

[Dave]

Just wrapped up in seat belts.

[Ron]

Yeah, Yeah. I couldn't sleep, though. I can't sleep on those flights. The way home, though, I raw dogged it. Slept literally for eight hours straight. Did not wake up. I woke up. We were landing in New York.

[Dave]

That must be nice, folks. Son of a boy. Dad is brought to you by Revolve. I am a huge fan of Revolve. Man. It is an unbelievable marketplace of clothing that. I mean, you guys know how I am with clothes. And this place has some good stuff, some nice stuff, and they have great sales, great deals, all kinds of brands. I mean, you got Big Dog brands. You know what I mean? Big Dog. And you get last minute deals and sort of like you, maybe you go on there and you don't even know what you need, but you just spend hours browsing and something catches your eye. This has happened to me a few times, by the way. I go to Revolve man and you're not drowning in 10,000 results or 50 pages of product. It's edited in a way that makes sense. You can actually select what specifically you're looking for and then obviously sort that from price high to low. And then just know that whatever the highest price is, is the one you need.

[Francis Ellis]

You have to. That's the Francis method.

[Dave]

That's the method. Everything is styled so you can see how it works. Not just a product. I want a white background, but a whole outfit. It's not about one piece, it's about the full look. Revolve man shows you what goes with what so you're not guessing. Fast shipping and easy returns. Two day shipping is free and return are easy. So even if you order a couple options for a trip or an event, it's genuinely stress free. I ordered some Oliver people sunglasses from Revolve and I also ordered some nice new bathing suits for summer. And I had to because my old bathing suits don't fit anymore because I'm too large.

[Francis Ellis]

He's bulge.

[Ron]

You are getting fat as hell.

[Francis Ellis]

He's got that little Nas x bulge.

[Dave]

Yeah, it's not the bulge. It's the top of my thighs has gotten to a point where, you know, I can't put things in the pockets of my bathing suits.

[Ron]

That's muffin top.

[Francis Ellis]

That's the women's favorite. Muffin top thighs.

[Dave]

Don't you dare call me that. Whether it's a big night out, a wedding, a trip, or you just need something last minute that actually works. Revolve man always has it. Go to Revolve.com Boyd AD to shop and use code BOYDAD for 15% off your order. Free two day shipping, easy returns. It just makes everything easier. That's Revolve.com Boyd AD and use code Boyd AD for 15% off your entire order offer end soon. Don't sleep on it. Oh, man. Then I got in an Uber from JFK and it was one hour and 32 minutes.

[Ron]

Oh, what time?

[Francis Ellis]

8:00am yeah, that's how far Philadelphia is.

[Dave]

Yeah, bro. Imagine being a tourist who has flown from like Singapore or wherever to New York and you don't know. Yeah, it'd be reasonable not to know how far JFK is from the city. And you, you've been flying for 14 hours.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

And you get in your Uber and you're like, all right, 20 minutes. Yeah, we'll be at our hotel. No. Hour and a half.

[Ron]

Longer if they're going into, like, Manhattan.

[Dave]

I went into Manhattan.

[Ron]

Oh, okay.

[Francis Ellis]

Okay.

[Dave]

I just came. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

So that's probably the average ride for somebody is going to. Around where you came today, and it's 90 minutes, and you're just looking at, like, three. Graveyards are the best thing. You'll see. Like, the city's so far away for so long.

[Dave]

Dude, my driver was furious the whole 90 minutes.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

He was just this, like, Latin guy who was like, you know.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Freaking out. Like, drivers, bicyclists. Once we got into the city, there was a guy biking the wrong way into traffic and looking at his phone.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

And he, like. He rolled his window down, and he was like, yeah, Yeah. I don't really do Spanish, so, you know, out of respect.

[Francis Ellis]

I thought I understood that.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

It sounded legit.

[Ron]

I've been getting that a lot recently. The Uber drivers that are, like, pissed.

[Dave]

They're furious.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

And I. I was like, wow, man. I finally. I said to him, I was like, man, I don't know how you do this job. Like, yeah, this really seems to bother you. And he goes every day. Every day. I get in fight every single day. He goes, when. When no passenger is much worse. Oh, yeah, it's much worse.

[Ron]

He's like, pulling over.

[Dave]

He's like, if you're not here is so bad. He goes, the food delivery drivers. Oh, they don't care at all.

[Ron]

He's right.

[Dave]

And I was like, well, we need our low main, but that is two

[Francis Ellis]

different classes of immigrants. You know what I mean?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Food delivery.

[Ron]

Undocumented food delivery is kind of frowned upon by the drivers.

[Francis Ellis]

Yes, exactly. Those are the documented immigrants. Yeah, Drivers.

[Ron]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

That's so. I mean, it's got to be frustrating. But you. It's your duty as the passenger in that position to be on his side. You have to go to war with him. And if someone cuts you off, you're like that guy.

[Dave]

Dude, you know my policy about not. Not cutting traffic and stuff like that when I'm a passenger in an Uber? Oh, yeah. Yeah. If there's a long line heading into a. An exit, I'm like, hey, bud, see how 400 cars up there are people crossing that double white line? Why don't we go ahead?

[Francis Ellis]

Really?

[Dave]

No. I don't actually say it, but they do it.

[Francis Ellis]

And you're fine with it?

[Dave]

I don't Say anything. What am I going to do? I don't tell a chef how to cook.

[Francis Ellis]

No, I like it. I just. I'm surprised that that's your outlook on it as the warrior passenger.

[Dave]

When I'm a passenger, I think it would be incredibly petulant and condescending to tell my Uber driver, excuse me, sir, you understand that what you're doing is actually causing longer buildup for the people that are playing by the rules?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Stand that.

[Francis Ellis]

You just got a passive aggressively sigh at him then. That's the only way to communicate with the Uber driver.

[Dave]

I hold on to the. The handle that folds out of the roof for dear fucking life is what I do. Start to finish.

[Francis Ellis]

I love it. I love when they cross over. I'm all like, I'm. You're on like international waters in an Uber. Break all the rules. Just getting all the fights.

[Ron]

Yeah. I get jacked up when they start breaking the rules. And try just tailing an ambulance with the sirens on. I love that.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

You're like, we're flying.

[Dave]

Yeah. Pull a siren from underneath. Okay. I didn't know you were a. A part time emt.

[Francis Ellis]

You should have explained to him about cortisol spiking, though. I know what that sounds for his long term health. The fact that his cortisol is getting up into that range.

[Ron]

It sounds like it's just out of control.

[Dave]

Can you tell me a little bit about cortisol spike?

[Ron]

Oh, with weight gain, irritation.

[Francis Ellis]

I mean, that's the stress hormone. Every. Every type of buildup that. That you could possibly want to avoid.

[Dave]

Plaque from your.

[Ron]

Yes, actually not lasting long enough in bed.

[Francis Ellis]

Your cortisol spikes, your plaque builds up, you start swallowing your plaque, the plaque gets into your heart, you start getting dementia. You stressed yourself into insanity.

[Dave]

Yep.

[Francis Ellis]

That's literally what happens with cortisol spiking. Oh, you could have wired but tired changes. Headaches.

[Ron]

You feeling wired but tired.

[Francis Ellis]

Wired and tired.

[Ron]

What do you feel? Wired but tired.

[Dave]

I don't know how I feel right now. Cortisol spike.

[Francis Ellis]

What? I think you are the definition of wired but tired right now. You're like dialed in for the show, but you. All those Lemmy sleep gummies in you,

[Ron]

you have skin changes. Has your skin changed at all?

[Dave]

I itch all the time. I'm not disaster. I am the itchiest guy alive.

[Ron]

You might be living at a full spike.

[Francis Ellis]

He's up at a butte, he's plateaued at cortisol and he's staying there.

[Dave]

Wired and tired is funny. That'll be the name of the episode.

[Francis Ellis]

Wired and tired.

[Ron]

All of these.

[Dave]

Go ahead and write that down.

[Ron]

Except for the stretch. Stretch marks on my belly. W. God.

[Francis Ellis]

You don't have stretch marks.

[Ron]

No, not yet.

[Francis Ellis]

It's from. It's because you're keeping your cortisol low.

[Ron]

Exactly. Maybe I'm low.

[Dave]

Wait a minute, wait a minute. Unintentional weight loss. Go down. That's on there.

[Francis Ellis]

Low cortisol.

[Ron]

Oh, I could have this, to be honest.

[Dave]

Well, then I don't want that because I want my weight loss to be intentional.

[Francis Ellis]

Right. Well, that's because you have high cortisol, so you do. I think you. That's. You're. You're showing all signs of high cortisol.

[Ron]

I think I might just be fat.

[Francis Ellis]

No, no, it's your cortisol. You have a blockage.

[Ron]

I'm noticing the weight gain in the. I have. I've come. I have some signs of high and low cortisol.

[Dave]

The worst of both.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, I'm like an introvert. Extrovert.

[Ron]

I don't know what I am because I'm fatigued and I have stomach fat. It's like, oh, it sounds like you're just fat.

[Francis Ellis]

You might be a fat guy. Has nothing to do with your cortisol, bro.

[Dave]

We went to. We went to. So Brandon had never been to the Golden Gate Bridge before, and I had a rental car, so I was like, all right, well, why don't we drive across it? And we went across the Golden Gate Bridge.

[Ron]

Were you doing that because you secretly hoped you were going to save someone's life?

[Dave]

That would have been a question I would have answered with the joke I was getting to. That sucks. All right. At least we're on the same page.

[Ron]

I just had a feeling that I could see you doing that with only the entire intention of hoping to stop someone from jumping.

[Dave]

Well, the whole jumping thing was an amazing. I learned a lot about it. First of all, the. The nets that they talk about having put up to catch people jumping from the Golden Gate Bridge. You can clear them.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

If you don't clear them, you should kill yourself.

[Ron]

You're gonna die.

[Dave]

You have no, like, standing broad jump ability whatsoever. Like, I. How long.

[Francis Ellis]

How far out are they?

[Dave]

But you're jumping from pretty high above them, so you can. You can. You know, maybe you're the physics guy.

[Ron]

Like, could you just do a quick equation and figure out how.

[Dave]

When the art. When the force of gravity counteracts the

[Francis Ellis]

force of, like, 10 meters per second

[Ron]

per second, a mile long,

[Francis Ellis]

and that's Her a mile long. You'd have to be shot out of a. Out of a cannon to get to clear the.

[Dave]

So anyway, the other part of it

[Ron]

is you probably think like, oh, 90% decline in suicides. 73. 2.

[Dave]

Yeah. Because I would think that most of the people killing themselves off the Golden Gate Bridge probably can't. Like they're not. Like

[Francis Ellis]

they're not coming right from the NFL.

[Dave]

Yeah. It's not the combine. Like, you know, you got to stick the land.

[Ron]

10 foot broad net. Must just be humiliating. That's gotta be.

[Dave]

So, so get this. So get this. The net. You think it's like, you know, the type of net you see at a baseball field?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Wrong.

[Dave]

It is steel chicken wire. If you get caught in that thing like you're coming home looking.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

You got a thatched pattern across your

[Francis Ellis]

whole body ripped up.

[Dave]

Like when they pull you out of there with like a fireman crane or some shit, like they're. It's all sticking to your clothes and your skin.

[Ron]

I mean, it must cost a lot of money just to get someone out of the net.

[Dave]

I think so.

[Ron]

Probably millions.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Is it. I don't know, Is it just a flat mat? Is it just a flat.

[Dave]

Why would it be millions?

[Ron]

I mean, they got to get like a crane down there.

[Dave]

They send a fire truck, you know.

[Ron]

Yeah. Kind of like there's probably some sort of system to speed it up. Maybe the nets come up.

[Dave]

Everybody in San Francisco rock climbs. They definitely have gear.

[Francis Ellis]

People who are.

[Ron]

The net is $400 million.

[Francis Ellis]

It's a waste. The wasteful $400 million anti suicide.

[Dave]

But hold on a minute. That doesn't account for the cost of. Of all the body bags that were fishing people out of the water.

[Ron]

True.

[Dave]

And I know for a fact that the Coast Guard spent a huge portion of its budget every year on new body bags.

[Ron]

Really?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Dave]

They were always pulling people out of the water.

[Francis Ellis]

Well, because you know, the San Francisco gays and their designer body.

[Dave]

Yeah, exactly. That's not pleasant.

[Francis Ellis]

They had the best. The top of the line.

[Dave]

No. Right. But then I was thinking about this because my hotel looked out over the Bay Bridge. Do you know the Bay Bridge?

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

So that's heads over to like, you know, Oakland and whatnot. And I couldn't help but wonder, like, are there people who just have such a low opinion of themselves that they don't think they deserve to kill themselves off the Golden Gate Bridge? So they jump off of the Bay Bridge where they're like, ah, the Golden Gate. I Mean, I haven't heard that. Like, imagine how humbly suicidal. You'd have to be respectful to be like, you know, that's for the big leagues.

[Ron]

Like, I mean, is it lower? Like, I would definitely rather not jump off of the Golden Gate Bridge.

[Dave]

Well, the issue with the Bay Bridge is that there's no walking path. So if you're gonna jump off of that one, you have to walk with traffic. Kind of.

[Ron]

Got a jog?

[Dave]

Yeah. Or get a ride.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Just be like, let me off here. I'll actually.

[Ron]

I'm good from here.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

The fact that they didn't spend $400 million on the net on the bridge to Oakland, it makes it way funnier.

[Ron]

I know, right?

[Francis Ellis]

Just like, if you're going from What's. What's north of there. Sausalito.

[Dave]

No, Sausalito is just on the other side. Oh, on the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Like, Sausalito to San Francisco. Those lives are worth $400 million.

[Dave]

Those are. Those are dentists who have been found out.

[Ron]

Even have guard rails on the Oakland Bridge.

[Francis Ellis]

It's just a swinging drawbridge, people. Just to walk from Oakland across a waterfall every day.

[Dave]

We got across the Golden Gate, and Brandon was like, well, that was cool. Want to go to wine country? And I was like, it. So then we drove to Sonoma.

[Ron]

Oh, wow.

[Dave]

How far is that for the day? Another hour and 20 minutes.

[Ron]

Damn.

[Dave]

We went to, like, northern Sonoma, and I have a friend who. His family owns a winery there. And I just called him up, and I was like, hey, dude, we're on the way to your winery. Is that okay? He's like, oh, my God. And he set us up, and we got a tour and, like, caves and all this awesome stuff.

[Ron]

That's sick.

[Dave]

Yeah, it was cool. And then we. And we drove back.

[Francis Ellis]

What kind of wine are they pedaling over there?

[Dave]

Well, they got. It's called Knightsbridge. It's spectacular. Truly, really good. They've got. I think cab is there. Like, is that. What.

[Ron]

What kind of nets does that one have?

[Dave]

That's a good question.

[Francis Ellis]

The drawbridge.

[Dave]

Grape nets.

[Francis Ellis]

The Knights Bridge.

[Dave]

It was really good. It was cool. So, yeah, we had a. We had a really cool time. I mean, honestly, San Francisco, I feel like somehow the. The conservative right has just, like, attached such a skid mark to that entire city.

[Ron]

Yeah, it does have a pretty bad

[Dave]

reputation as being, like, a. They've just somehow made it into being, like, a. Such a cesspool, but.

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[Dave]

Every time I go, I'm like, this is the most remarkable city in America.

[Ron]

Yeah, it's really not bad. It's really nice.

[Dave]

Yeah, there's homeless people, but where aren't there homeless people?

[Ron]

I don't know. That's something that I don't understand. When everyone says that about, like. Like, oh, you go to San Francisco, they're walking around in herds and it's like, well, first of all, another nod. And second of all, it's like, yeah, if you go to any city, like, they're. Yeah, they're very compact.

[Dave]

I will say, like, Denver. Yeah, Denver. LA LA's. LA is the worst that I've probably. San Diego's really bad. But I will say Burt's theater last night was called the Warfield, and it was in the Tenderloin. And I parked on the street nearby and just walking a block and a half from my car to the entrance to the theater, I passed a homeless guy who was smoking crack. I think that's. It's out of the tin foil with a glass pipe.

[Ron]

That's fentanyl.

[Dave]

Is that fentanyl?

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

[Dave]

Well, that's. I mean, that's good to hear.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, that's nice.

[Dave]

It doesn't really have the cortisol spiking nature of crap, you know?

[Ron]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's the big thing. I think that's like what most of the people on the street are doing now is just smoking fentanyl.

[Francis Ellis]

Sounds nice.

[Dave]

I. I learned a lot about fentanyl.

[Ron]

You see that. That video of that Indian dude smoking the fentanyl on the bus? Did you see that?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Ron]

And he's like, bro, what are you doing?

[Dave]

Y.

[Francis Ellis]

You're actually the one smoking fentanyl.

[Dave]

Does he say that?

[Ron]

Yeah, there's like a Guy filming him, and he's like, dude, what are you doing? You're smoking Fentanyl on the bus. And he's like, you can't be filming me, man.

[Francis Ellis]

You're. No, you're smoking. Bus driver. He's smoking Fentanyl.

[Ron]

Yeah. He gets, like, super defensive

[Dave]

fetty. This guy looks pretty good, to be honest with you.

[Ron]

See, it's catching a buzz before work. Nothing wrong with that.

[Francis Ellis]

You don't think anybody's coming the barstool office and smoke a little Fentanyl? There's probably about 20% of the workforce.

[Ron]

We could have a couple users.

[Dave]

Did you watch Euphoria?

[Francis Ellis]

Not. Not last night, no.

[Dave]

But I'm saying the first two seasons.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Do you remember the scene where Rue takes the fentanyl?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

It renders her incapacitated from one tiny drop, right?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

But why is this guy able to, like, smoke Fentanyl? Is that ingesting the drop? Is that a far more concentrated dose?

[Ron]

I think it's. No, I think it's. They're probably smoking the similar dose, if I had to guess.

[Francis Ellis]

But I think people, if you're on drugs, you probably want to get the drug that's going to put you into a black hole. You want the really strong one. And then maybe there's some people who are just smoking it and, like, maybe it's not the best drug, or maybe their tolerance is higher and then they could walk through the world.

[Dave]

I see.

[Francis Ellis]

And just be on the bus smoking it.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.

[Francis Ellis]

Imagine how good it is that you can't even wait to get off the bus.

[Ron]

I know.

[Francis Ellis]

Imagine how good it feels that you just can't help yourself.

[Dave]

I was like that with my school lunches.

[Francis Ellis]

You ate it first period.

[Dave]

I was like, ah, I'm not even at school yet. Yet my whole entree is gone.

[Francis Ellis]

You're eating your lunch.

[Dave]

I'm gonna have a lunch of grapes and Dan.

[Ron]

And yogurt is the worst.

[Dave]

Yeah, get in there.

[Ron]

And you're just done with lunch already.

[Dave]

How could I be so hungry? Oh, that's right. I'm growing 7 inches a year right now. Come home and take a nap, because puberty is just like taking all the water out of my body. Oh, my God. I did.

[Ron]

So I did the. I moved this week or last week, I guess.

[Dave]

Oh, yeah. By the way, I texted you about that and you wouldn't tell us where you moved to.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, I was just fucking around. I told him. I told you to move to Philly.

[Dave]

Yeah, I mean, I like, that it's closer then I was really curious because this has been an ongoing saga for us.

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I ended up finding a place in Queens, luckily. But Rockaway? No beach? No, no. But I ended up, I. So I, I had to like schedule all like the movers and which by the way, I thought that these moving companies cost like $3,000 for like the move.

[Francis Ellis]

It's just gonna be a jacked Russian guy that comes to your place.

[Ron]

Yeah, it was like 500 bucks.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, I, I, I.

[Ron]

The whole time I was like, I'm getting a U haul myself. I'm not spending all this money. And then I was like, oh, it's 500.

[Francis Ellis]

What did you tip the bro? So.

[Ron]

Oh, I took care of the boys.

[Francis Ellis]

Where'd you tip them?

[Dave]

That's that. You didn't?

[Ron]

No, I did. It was, I think I gave him 80 bucks each for three dudes. Three. Three dudes? Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

That's good on 500 bucks total. That's a 50 tip.

[Ron]

Yeah, not bad.

[Francis Ellis]

Damn near 50 tip.

[Ron]

Felt felt solid.

[Dave]

Right?

[Ron]

I mean I also packed up the whole place before. Like they didn't really have to do anything.

[Dave]

Oh, so you didn't do them?

[Ron]

They were in and out 10 minutes.

[Dave]

Yeah, that's easy. And then they just brought the boxes into the new place.

[Ron]

I just said put them all in one room.

[Dave]

Is your new place of walk up?

[Ron]

No.

[Dave]

You've an elevator.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Oh, fuck yeah, dude.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Welcome to the next chapter

[Ron]

two.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

Oh, it did. But you never used it. Now on the second floor.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

What floor are you on now?

[Ron]

The third.

[Dave]

Ah, see?

[Francis Ellis]

It's okay. I see you, bro.

[Dave]

Does your new building have doormen?

[Ron]

No.

[Dave]

No. So your packages will still get stolen.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Okay, good. Way more just gonna say going to take the stairs.

[Ron]

No, the third floor. Were you crazy?

[Francis Ellis]

I don't know. Did you take the stairs to the second floor?

[Ron]

Yeah, every time. But that wasn't even the second floor. It was one flight of stairs like a half.

[Dave]

That's the second floor. Why wouldn't that be the second floor?

[Ron]

Because it was the. My old apartment. The building went down a step. No, it went down like probably five steps and then five and it would be one.

[Dave]

That's a baker's five steps. Maybe that's an NBA travel that you're you, you're given that there.

[Ron]

You know, it was funny when I was two steps when I was leaving, I was like, I was like, damn, like finally leaving this place. It's been a while getting a little sentimental. And then I went, Yeah, I went to return my key to the super, and I was. I was. I was handing it back, and she goes, what's your name again? And I was like, all right, this place. I'm getting the hell out of here. I was like, oh, your daughter was in my room. That was the one. That was the one where your child walked into my unit.

[Francis Ellis]

She did not care about that. No. No, she didn't.

[Dave]

God damn, dude. I will miss the stories that came out of that place. You didn't feel like knocking on your neighbor's door one last time and just giving her a little.

[Ron]

Oh, smooch.

[Dave]

Goodbye.

[Ron]

Hell no.

[Dave]

You know, hey, listen, I know it's always been like a will they, won't they with us?

[Ron]

But no, they were definitely fired up that I was leaving because the. I think some other girl was moving into my building that, like, she was. I think there's some whole interconnections that I didn't know about, therefore leading to me to believe that they were stealing my packages. I really think they were.

[Francis Ellis]

Of course they were.

[Ron]

I really think that.

[Francis Ellis]

What do you mean? What do you mean? Your packages were disappearing?

[Ron]

I know.

[Francis Ellis]

Right away. Of course they were, like, as soon

[Ron]

as they were delivered.

[Francis Ellis]

But how can you be like, I really think they were?

[Ron]

Because I don't know. You know, enough time went by where I didn't have one get stolen, where I was like, maybe they weren't stealing.

[Francis Ellis]

She's playing in your fucking face.

[Ron]

Yeah, she's probably gonna be stealing them from my new place.

[Francis Ellis]

She knows your name. She probably has your identity.

[Dave]

The hottest black market depot for video game controllers came out of the West Village of New York for the last three years.

[Francis Ellis]

The only thing that got through was a fucking kettlebell. Because they picked it up and were

[Dave]

like, no, this is a lot of controllers.

[Francis Ellis]

He's fucking with us.

[Dave]

What is this controller made of?

[Ron]

But I did have a funny story. So I was. I was leaving. It was. I think this was. I moved Thursday and Wednesday. I was, like, getting everything set up up. Thursday, the movers come at 8am so I'm like, they're. They take. They get everything out very early. And then I was like, I guess I'll just stay and wait for the junk people to come so that I don't have to, like, go back and forth and let people in. And then the junk people called me. So I'm sitting on the couch, like, that's. That's the only thing that's left.

[Dave]

Like a couple.

[Ron]

Yeah. And like, a couple bags of clothes and shit. And I get a call, and they're like, hey, this is the junk removal people. We're just. We're ready to process your payment. And I was like, oh, it's a little weird. I guess they do it before. I don't know. And he's like, so you're aware, like, it's gonna be a little bit extra because we'll, like, we had to chop up the couch and all that. And I was like, yeah, yeah, of course. And I was like, but just a heads up, I'm actually not having my couch removed anymore because the new tenant is gonna keep my couch. And he was like, like, I'm a little confused, though, because you told us that you needed us to chop up the couch. Like, we already did it. Like, we already chopped it up. And I was like, wait, I'm sitting on my couch right now?

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, no. Oh, no.

[Ron]

And the dude is like, the blue one.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, no.

[Ron]

I'm like, no, man.

[Dave]

He goes, are you just a little blue, Very light? I don't know.

[Ron]

He goes, are you sure? And I was like, yeah, man, I'm sitting on my couch. And he was like, all right, we're gonna have to call you back. And then he calls me back, like, five minutes later. And I was like. I was howling, laughing, because I'm like, they just chopped up some random person's couch. Like, they just broke into someone's apartment, destroyed their couch, and left. And then he called me back, and he was like, it was a. We mixed up the appointments. It was another person that's having the same thing. Yeah, but I was like. I said. I was like, I thought you guys destroyed someone else's couch. And they were. They were hooting and hollering.

[Dave]

They were laughing about it. Oh, yeah, Because I'll tell you what, I had junk removal guys come, and it was. They. We did not hoot or.

[Ron]

Oh, really?

[Dave]

They were serious when they had to chop up my couch, too. And then they cut through all the

[Ron]

way through to the floor. Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And then I lost the entire security deposit. And then I hit them up, and I was like, by the way, remember when you cut the floor of my apartment? And they were like, that wasn't us. And I was like, I watched it happen.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

And they were like, well, there were lots of scratches on the floor before. And I was like, yeah, but there wasn't sawdust and deep, like, scarring ruts. There wasn't a trench that would collect water in the floor before. And I was like, look, it's fine. We had security. Like, they are not security insurance. They had to submit their building insurance or whatever for when they come into my building when I lived in the same building as Ron. And. And I like, I was like, we'll just use the insurance. And he was like. He's like, look, when we invoke a claim, it raises our rates. In other words, we don't have insurance. In other words, that was a completely forged document. Policy document. And I'm like, But, you know, I will say, like, security deposits in New York is just like one of those things. A lot of the time you're like, I'm not getting that back.

[Ron]

No, no, no.

[Dave]

You kiss it goodbye. I have gotten it back probably like 80% of the time.

[Ron]

The best thing that I've ever had was when I lived at my old apartment, like on Waverly, and I left something. Like there was something that I did that was like they were going to take it out, but they just removed how much it costs to get that removed and then sent me the rest of the security deposit.

[Dave]

That's really nice.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

That's honest. And that's pretty rare because you don't get that ever. Do you know that I sued my old landlords for taking my whole security deposit?

[Ron]

No, I did not know that.

[Dave]

Have I not told you that story?

[Ron]

I don't think so.

[Dave]

Did you not told you that story?

[Francis Ellis]

It sounds vaguely familiar.

[Dave]

Three apartments ago when I lived in Chelsea and my landlords were just crooks.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

That's the apartment the guy broke in.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And he was friends with my landlord.

[Ron]

Yeah. Similar situation to what I was dealing with.

[Dave]

Oh, right now?

[Ron]

No, no, I was joking. I was talking about my name.

[Dave]

My.

[Ron]

My super stealing from me.

[Dave]

Oh, got it.

[Francis Ellis]

Well, you.

[Ron]

A little bit similar.

[Dave]

You said that the new tenant is connected to them.

[Ron]

Oh, it's a whole. They got a whole. Yeah, I think it's a whole operation that they're running.

[Dave]

What kind of an operation would that be?

[Ron]

Get some fake tenants in there. Make it believe, like, this is a real residential area I live in.

[Dave]

They're like. They're like.

[Ron]

You don't know is they're all spies.

[Dave]

They're crap. They're crisis actors.

[Ron]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

I had to live in the worst apartment in New York. But, you know, the fact that she wants your couch does not speak highly of her employment.

[Ron]

Yeah, I don't know why anyone would have ever looked at that couch and said, leave that behind.

[Dave]

Think of who has slept on that couch. Nobody really I thought it was like Lemaire.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

When you say nobody, how.

[Ron]

I guess that was. I mean, that was years ago.

[Francis Ellis]

He said nobodies. Like they're nobody. Like they don't get booked. Yeah,

[Ron]

nobodies.

[Francis Ellis]

They don't do arenas.

[Ron]

That's crazy.

[Francis Ellis]

Crazy to say that about our brothers left on my couch.

[Ron]

About our brothers in Austin.

[Francis Ellis]

My brothers, not yours. You just called them nobodies. I call them. Somebody slept on that couch.

[Ron]

But yeah, I mean, that couch is kind of. It was pretty. Like I was not like I was gonna sleep.

[Dave]

Both slept on it.

[Ron]

Yeah, I guess a lot of people slept on that couch. Really jumped the gun on nobody.

[Dave]

At least you're. It's. It's progress that you're admitting that there is a gulf between your blanket statement and the reality.

[Ron]

Yeah, I mean, there was like all. Like, it was gross.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Gross couch.

[Francis Ellis]

Now keep it clean, though. You're gonna keep your new spot clean. Where'd you go? You didn't go to Ashley Furniture, did you?

[Ron]

I haven't gotten. That's. Those are just gonna bring that up. Ashley Furniture haven't gotten a couch yet.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, you gotta go to go to Ashley, bro.

[Ron]

I don't feel like spying. Another couch is the problem.

[Francis Ellis]

What are you talking about? You have a new apartment. What are you gonna just sit in your gaming chair?

[Ron]

No, that's the thing is just get a couch. Yeah, but they're like. They're just so expensive. Like, I might. I might just get like a bean bag.

[Dave]

They're not expensive. You know who you can get a couch from where it's a great price?

[Ron]

Amazon.

[Dave]

Wayfair.

[Francis Ellis]

Wayfair.

[Dave]

The best, our sponsor.

[Ron]

But how do you get them to bring the couch up?

[Francis Ellis]

Some couch. Not all couches are a one piece thing. There's some from Wayfair. That's like you put it together on your own sectionals.

[Ron]

What if I get the boneless couch? What are our thoughts on the beanbag? On the boneless.

[Dave]

You're just talking about a beanbag.

[Ron]

No, no, no. The boneless cat. It's like this comes in a box.

[Francis Ellis]

You open it, it puffs out and you puff.

[Ron]

It takes like three days for it to puff out.

[Dave]

Are you talking about like a pool float?

[Francis Ellis]

You have to pump it like a bicycle tire.

[Dave]

Listen to me. You need. You just asked me.

[Ron]

I think I get one of these.

[Francis Ellis]

Look at this guy. Look at the person in the middle. What are they? They're doing a damn acrobatic.

[Ron]

I think that that's What I get?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. That's perfect.

[Ron]

They're like 200 bucks.

[Dave]

Why don't you work with Wayfair and. And they're like, one of the largest furniture retailers.

[Ron]

I know, I know. I was looking at their website this

[Dave]

weekend, and they have truly amazing deals. And you asked, how do you get it into your apartment? They do that for you?

[Ron]

They bring it up. Because when I'd used Amazon, they didn't bring it up. The guy said, this is where I stop.

[Dave]

Correct. That's why you don't do Amazon and you do Wayfair.

[Francis Ellis]

I just got a bar card off Wayfair.

[Dave]

You might have to pay a little. I don't actually know, but you might have to pay a little bit extra for what's called the White glove service,

[Ron]

where they bring it up.

[Dave]

They give you a martini as you're carrying your furniture.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

A string quartet follows it up. They play it into your apartment. It's so nice. You gotta get on Wayfair. You got to get some inflatable. I was. I was looking at some people's setups for Coachella, and it's like three tents attached to one another with inflatable couches all over the place. Like, they have the full living room set up.

[Ron]

That's what I need. I need some inflatables.

[Francis Ellis]

You need to get the Coachella set up. Just get some tapestries separating room from room. You have open floor plan or what? What's the square footage, brother?

[Ron]

I don't know.

[Francis Ellis]

You're gonna have way more weirdo people that you interact with, though, in Queens as opposed to. In.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Village or West Village.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Why don't you say your address now that you're gone?

[Ron]

I'm not saying my address.

[Dave]

You're safe. No one's going out there, cuz.

[Ron]

I don't know. No need. Need.

[Francis Ellis]

It's that pink building.

[Ron]

I don't need people to know. To know how beautiful of a spot it was.

[Dave]

How far are you from LaGuardia now? Yeah.

[Ron]

Chip in a pot.

[Dave]

Come on. A cast in a reel.

[Ron]

I mean, I could book a flight like, 30 minutes prior. Yeah. And just get on it.

[Dave]

Is it truly like a five to ten minute Uber?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Yeah. Less than ten minutes.

[Dave]

Did I tell you you. I did tell you how I made my flight after our. Yeah, maybe I shouldn't have buried the lead on that. That we have Mark Normand coming.

[Francis Ellis]

Yes. That'll be. That'll be out soon.

[Dave]

Should we cut that?

[Ron]

No, I don't think it matters.

[Francis Ellis]

That'll be out Next week when we're filming other stuff.

[Ron]

What else?

[Francis Ellis]

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[Dave]

It.

[Francis Ellis]

I saw when I walked into the office today, I saw our security guard downstairs drinking the hand sanitizer straight from the bottle and muttering the nw. No way to God.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Who? Dan?

[Ron]

No.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, he's drunk off hand sanitizer. The 99.9% pure drunk off hand sanitizer. Muttering the N word to himself like he was any. It was like saying like the New York N words instead of the New York Knicks.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

What?

[Ron]

Yeah. Is this real?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Danny was doing this.

[Ron]

Dan, the security guy. Yeah, I just saw him downstairs. I know he wasn't drinking hand sanitizer this morning.

[Francis Ellis]

He was.

[Dave]

Is that because Ebony wasn't here today that he felt like it was okay to get away with him?

[Francis Ellis]

He was so out of pocket. I couldn't believe it.

[Ron]

Do you guys have beef? Like, is there a reason?

[Francis Ellis]

No, he wasn't saying it to me.

[Ron]

Spread such a crazy rumor about him.

[Dave]

What a thing to say. I'm waiting for the punchline. I know Rome will find a way to bring this home.

[Ron]

Is there. Is there a reason? Is he a big Knicks fan? What fan? A Knicks fan.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, yeah, I guess.

[Ron]

Are you guys beefing over the Sixers? Knicks.

[Dave]

That's what it is.

[Francis Ellis]

No, I wasn't even beefing about it.

[Ron]

Sound beef. You guys are beefing?

[Francis Ellis]

There's no beef.

[Dave]

He just said it.

[Francis Ellis]

He's just saying it. Drinking hand sanitizer to the fucking dome. He said no one counts the hand sanitizer.

[Dave]

I have a thing to say about somebody. It's so specific. It's so specific. It's believable.

[Ron]

I thought you were being serious at first.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, dude, I was. I am.

[Ron]

He was drinking hand sanitizer straight from the bottle. Where was it from?

[Francis Ellis]

It was on the. You know how it's on the.

[Ron]

There's so much free booze just in the office.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, but people keep track of that. People keep track of that.

[Ron]

And, yeah, it says you can't drink it.

[Francis Ellis]

You shouldn't.

[Ron]

Well, you should.

[Francis Ellis]

Did you tell him that he can't say that?

[Ron]

That he can't drink hand sanitizer?

[Francis Ellis]

No, he was, like, gone off of it. It seemed like he'd been here since super early in the morning drinking hand sanitizer.

[Ron]

Oh, they got menthol in it.

[Dave]

Dude. I walked by. I walked by Sparky today, and downstairs on the first floor and your boy

[Francis Ellis]

Sparky and the guy who works the second elevator shaft.

[Dave]

Correct?

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And I walked by him and I go, hey, Sparky. He goes, what up? And then as I was getting in the elevator, he turned to the guy behind the podium and he goes, everybody in this building knows Hawaii.

[Ron]

He's not wrong.

[Francis Ellis]

Just bragging about you knowing it.

[Dave]

Everybody in the building knows who I am.

[Francis Ellis]

Just the fact that you came from a theater show on your way to a stadium show. I mean, but that just makes it so much funnier because in his dynamic, he's just like this dick rider.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Get off my dick. Sparky called bad. Wish I could show you the amount of calls, answered calls and missed calls I. I have from him this past weekend. Yeah, he and I are in constant correspondence.

[Dave]

Wanna. Can you guys give me an update on. Is. Is there stuff happening in bar. In the barstool world? What was this? What was this? There was the. Another group went to Vegas.

[Ron]

Oh, for Max's bachelor party.

[Francis Ellis]

For Max's bachelor party.

[Dave]

Oh, and was it like the Pardon My Take crew?

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

Oh, that's fun.

[Francis Ellis]

I. I FaceTime Max after the Sixers game, and he was just with his two brothers. And it's just two other exact Maxes.

[Ron]

Not surprised.

[Francis Ellis]

One of his shoulders just screaming into the. Into the camera like we've known each other our whole lives. I think they were all just, like, buddied up. I think that Max, like, from the looks of that video, that he just hung out with his brothers the entire time that he was just dialed in. Hilarious.

[Ron]

Just flew big cat and pft out there just to be with him and his brothers.

[Francis Ellis]

It seemed like they were like they were all a Three headed monster. It seemed like it was so fucking fun. They went through a lot of cool shit.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Look like a sick party.

[Dave]

I, I really like Max.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, he's.

[Dave]

I like him. Every time I've ever hung out with him or met him, I've, I've been like, that dude's great. And I don't say that about everyone, which makes you know that I hate all the other people I don't say it about. Yeah. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

He's got the best eyebrows in the company.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Best eyelashes are. Tate, I think.

[Dave]

What? What? Oh, just really quick. As a Celtics fan, that was one of the worst things I've ever watched.

[Francis Ellis]

What do you mean?

[Dave]

Lose? They, they won game one by 40 points.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

They were up 3:1 in this series. I, I, I thought it was a fucking rap. Yeah. Damn. And what happened?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, what happened?

[Ron]

I'll be honest, I didn't pay attention.

[Dave]

Tyrese Max, he's the fastest player in the NBA. That's what happened. Yeah, he can, he can get to the rim in a way where, where Biggs can't protect the rim because he's getting there too quickly.

[Francis Ellis]

And Joel Embiid is sick, too. He's.

[Dave]

Joel Embiid is amazing, and he's. And he hits his free throws.

[Ron]

I watched the first game of the series, and I was like, I'll watch the next series. And then I tuned it on.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, you chalked it up as a win.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

You counted your chickens.

[Ron]

Well, everyone, I don't really watch. I don't pay attention to the Celtics like, during the regular season, but everyone I know was like, we're going to the finals. So I was like, oh, this will be a breeze. And, and then I looked up on. When did they play game seven? Friday.

[Francis Ellis]

Saturday.

[Ron]

Saturday. On Saturday, I looked up NBA on tonight. I was like, I'll watch some football, watch some basketball. And then I saw Celtics, Sixers, Game 9 or Game 7. And I was like, I was like, Game 9?

[Francis Ellis]

It felt like Game 9.

[Ron]

I was like, Game 7. I was like, oh, what the. And then I watched that game and I watched us lose.

[Francis Ellis]

Don't care about that anymore. I guess I'll, I guess I actually never cared about.

[Dave]

Just made me mad, dude. I, I, you know, I haven't really had an investment. I don't really care about other teams and sports, but the Celtics matter to me. And, and when they lost that series, I was mad.

[Francis Ellis]

Really? Yeah.

[Dave]

I, like, fucking went on stage and was calling people the f. Slur. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

That's so nice, though.

[Dave]

San Francisco. A bunch of F slurs at this town.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Getting dragged off stage nuts.

[Dave]

Being nasty and mean, dirty Fs.

[Ron]

I love doing that.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Right after losing a Louie. When your team loses, it's the.

[Francis Ellis]

It's that or make a Twitter burner and throw some racism out there.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Directly at the player and their family's accounts.

[Dave]

I'm sorry that I'm lashing out at all you gays. My Celtics lost.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

The men I support lost.

[Dave]

Speaking of sports, I had this thought on the toilet.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, talk to me. Nice.

[Dave]

Think like als. The disease was called ALS until Lou Gehrig.

[Francis Ellis]

Right.

[Dave]

Got it. And then from then on, now it's really known as Lou Gehrig's disease.

[Francis Ellis]

That's why they call Chlamydia Wilt Chamberlain now.

[Dave]

I was gonna say, like, imagine being so good at your sports that, like, AIDS becomes Francis Ellis disease.

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah, that would be cool.

[Francis Ellis]

Do you want a better disease, though? Do you want, like. They'll only give you the name if that disease is shorted.

[Dave]

If it's. If it's an acronym.

[Francis Ellis]

No, I think if it's.

[Ron]

If it's like a deadly disease, like, I got Ellis. Yeah.

[Dave]

Like, Lou Gehrig is true.

[Ron]

True.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

The Alice Challenge.

[Dave]

What disease would you guys want named after you that currently exists?

[Francis Ellis]

Just like a pox or something like that. A small chicken pox or something. Something that like, everybody gets over but, like, has a little cachet.

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah. Covid.

[Dave]

What if diarrhea became settles disease?

[Ron]

Yeah, I mean, it would make sense.

[Dave]

Oh, boy. I got. I got a real bad case of the settles right now.

[Francis Ellis]

Why is Legionnaires called Legionnaires? Was that name after a person or like a group of people?

[Ron]

Legionnaire.

[Dave]

That's a good one.

[Francis Ellis]

We gotta Google that. We gotta find out why legionnaires is called, because that seemed. What's a Legionnaire? Legionnaires makes. It sounds like it's like a VFW group or something.

[Ron]

Sounds like an.

[Dave]

I think of like a. A soldier in the Roman army or something like that.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. Legionnaire of the American Legion convention in Philadelphia in 1976.

[Dave]

There you go.

[Francis Ellis]

What that's named after? Oh, I thought it was like an old disease. I thought it was like trench footers.

[Dave]

That's pretty Recent.

[Francis Ellis]

Recent legionnaires.

[Ron]

1976. Is that what it said?

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, Legionnaires.

[Ron]

It's crazy. They had 34 people dying of a disease in Philly in the 70s.

[Francis Ellis]

They had a mini covet in one city. What? Yeah. What the happened did. There was like some bad toothpaste or something.

[Ron]

Must have been.

[Francis Ellis]

That's what happens from sharing toothpaste. If you share another comedian.

[Ron]

What do you think this is, Legionnaire?

[Dave]

This Moocs disease? Dude, there are a number of obviously diseases that are just named after, I presume, the people who discovered them. Right. Guillain Barre syndrome. Or I'm assuming Hodgkin's lymphoma is named after Barry Hodgkins. I just made that up.

[Ron]

It's actually Mike lymphoma.

[Dave]

What is it? Mike lymphoma.

[Ron]

Well done.

[Dave]

Well done. I didn't deserve a laugh when you had a far better tag.

[Francis Ellis]

Thomas Hodgkin.

[Dave]

Thomas Hod.

[Francis Ellis]

So it's not that I always thought it was the person who had the disease first, not the doctor.

[Ron]

I think Hodgkin was the doctor and then lymphoma was. The guy was the patient got it

[Francis Ellis]

was a sick person.

[Ron]

Yeah, exactly. You want to clap. You want to go 50, 50 on this?

[Dave]

Yeah, but then. But, yeah, but then it's like, isn't it interesting that sometimes it's the person who gets there you go, why isn't HIV called. Called Magic?

[Francis Ellis]

I don't think he wants it named after him. I think he probably wants to, like, distance himself.

[Dave]

I think it was too late in the game. I think. I think it had been around long enough that he couldn't be patient zero.

[Ron]

A lot of people, famous people who had gotten it at that point.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Easy E. The lead singer of Queen Queen, Charlie Sheen.

[Francis Ellis]

Freddie Mercury.

[Dave]

Later. Freddie Mercury. Mercury disease would be. Well, then they'. Mercury poisoning.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Oh, age should be called mercury poisoning. Wow.

[Ron]

Yeah. The is the poison. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

The cock is the needle. The is the injection of the poison.

[Ron]

Damn.

[Dave]

Wow.

[Francis Ellis]

That's a little on the nose. A little too obvious.

[Ron]

Liberace, Anthony Perkins.

[Dave]

Kendrick Perkins.

[Francis Ellis]

That would break my heart.

[Ron]

It's got to be tough being one of those people on the list that just no one knew had aids.

[Dave]

Aids.

[Ron]

Like, no one knew that that guy from. From Psycho had AIDS until now.

[Francis Ellis]

That's what they're doing with homosexuality.

[Ron]

Yeah. Like, dude, weaponizing it or.

[Francis Ellis]

But like, guys would just be career gay guys. Career closeted gay guys.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

They come out of their closet after their death posthumously. And that's all they're known for. Da Vinci.

[Ron]

You see that video of that little kid doing the anti gay song?

[Francis Ellis]

I saw something a while ago about a little kid with the anti gay song, and it was pretty good.

[Ron]

This one's not good.

[Dave]

Great.

[Ron]

This one's pretty Bad.

[Francis Ellis]

Okay, I. I got it.

[Ron]

13 year old rapper. Got something to say?

[Francis Ellis]

Was this the kid? I think this kid is mostly. I think all of his songs are anti gay.

[Ron]

Seriously, he's got a gun in that.

[Francis Ellis]

I think he's got an anti gay catalog.

[Dave]

Oh my God. All right.

[Ron]

It's badass.

[Dave]

Oh, geez. I don't love this kid.

[Ron]

No, he's pretty bad.

[Francis Ellis]

Hear him out. Hear him out.

[Ron]

Bad kid.

[Dave]

I don't think we should. Let's not platform him.

[Ron]

Should get him on the pod. Pod.

[Dave]

Speaking of the pod. So in Oklahoma, I. We were, we were at this pretty sweet place called Shangri La. Was the like golf resort. It's on the lake. It was cool. And we're up by the course, we finish our round and there's a kid, probably a 13 year old kid on the practice putting green. And I'm wearing my son of a boy dad hat. Our new hat.

[Ron]

That was sick.

[Dave]

I wore it the whole week. And he goes, he goes, punting contest for your hat. Oh. And I was like, oh. I was like, do you know the pod? And he's like, oh yeah. Oh yeah. I'm like, you. You listen to son of a boy dad. He's like, I don't miss an episode. I'm like, dude, you're 13. Like that's. I. You can't. There can't be too many 13 year olds.

[Francis Ellis]

You'd be shocked. You'd be shocked that.

[Dave]

Listen to this.

[Francis Ellis]

It's mostly 13 year olds and girl it is. Dude, it is.

[Ron]

Now I've looked at the numbers. That would be devastating. But 13 year olds, all little boys listening to us.

[Francis Ellis]

No, we'd have to, we'd have to get like a food product that they could like buy.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Dave]

Lunch. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Like we need something.

[Ron]

Sassables

[Francis Ellis]

would be great. Imagine kids getting like a Capri sun and a premature cracker sandwich. That'll be so nice.

[Dave]

But then this kid was. Listen to how precocious.

[Ron]

What does that say, Tyler? 0.5% women or 13 year olds?

[Francis Ellis]

13 year olds.

[Ron]

Just got to make sure we're not putting out a kid's product.

[Dave]

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[Ron]

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[Dave]

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[Ron]

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[Dave]

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[Ron]

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[Dave]

So there you go. You might have met the one that's kid.

[Ron]

Yeah, that might be just that one. Yeah.

[Dave]

And I'm trying to think of what his name was. It was like Calvin or something like that. Anyway, so he. I'm like, all right, yeah, like, I'll. I'll. I'll do a put off with you for it. And then Frankie, he got Frankie to join too. And. And then he was like. He was like, actually, let's play for some money. Money. And I was like, what?

[Francis Ellis]

His white man can't jumping you?

[Dave]

And he's like, I got money. And I go, where do you have money from? And he goes, I day trade. I swear to God, Frankie can corroborate this entire story. And I was like, you. Is that even legal? You day trade?

[Ron]

That's crazy.

[Dave]

What are you talking about?

[Ron]

13 year olds.

[Dave]

And then he was the worst putter I've ever seen. We waxed him.

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

We actually didn't win a single. I was like, I'm keeping hat.

[Francis Ellis]

Did he put up anything?

[Dave]

No. I mean, we were just like, I wanted to give him the hat, but, you know, you got to earn it. And I can't just let this kid who's like, you know, a day trader.

[Francis Ellis]

That was one of three. Hat too.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

One of three.

[Ron]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[Dave]

He was funny.

[Francis Ellis]

Day trading.

[Ron]

Never missed an episode.

[Dave]

Dude, Jerry was such a riot.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah.

[Dave]

But you know, he. I mean, I spent so much time with him. He's just like, you and Mook. Like, bush is his life.

[Ron]

Oh, he's obsessed.

[Dave]

You guys are. Dude, we get to. We get. We get to Oklahoma late. So we flew into Tulsa, and then it was an hour and a half drive from Tulsa into the middle of nowhere. Northwest or northeast Oklahoma. Right on the Missouri border. God, I can't speak at all. And we're like, we're looking for food. There's no. There's nothing open. We, like, passed the area that had food, and we were like, there's probably something closer.

[Ron]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

Sure enough, there wasn't. We ended up going to eat dinner at a gas station that actually, like, wasn't horrible. And then as we are, it's. It's 10 minutes from the gas station to the course, and we pass a strip club called the Office.

[Ron]

Yeah, that's what it was. Right down Jerry's lane, the Office.

[Dave]

And I was like, oh, my God, Jerry he's like, they're not open on Tuesdays. He's like, they open Wednesdays to Saturdays. And I'm like, oh, my God. He's already done all the research. He knew the nearest strip club.

[Francis Ellis]

He's like one of those autistic people where you can be like, April 9, 1384. And he's like, it was a Tuesday.

[Dave]

Yeah. Charlene was dancing. She was wearing black panties. No, but so then we get to the hotel, we check in. It's late, dude.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

It's like. It's like the night watch lady.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And I go get my key and blah, blah, blah. And then he comes up and he goes, I'm sorry, do you guys have any PCs here? And she's like, I'm sorry, what? He's like, do you have any, you know, personal computers? She's like, we have a business media center. But no, I don't think so. He's like, okay, well, I need to do some gaming. Like, he stays up till four in the morning gaming every night, and then he wakes up at 6.

[Ron]

Yeah, he wakes up early.

[Dave]

He sleeps two hours a night. Dude. That's it.

[Ron]

Yeah, dude. Like, he'll.

[Dave]

You're gonna live to 45 doing that. That's the life expectancy rate. The only other people have live like, that are like, Mozart.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dave]

And Benjamin Franklin, I think.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Or like Soldiers Under Siege. Like, you have to, like, your cortisol is through the roof.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Your blood pressure is, like, howling. It's like a teapot.

[Ron]

Yeah. I mean, he definitely. He doesn't really sleep. I mean, he's up. You're like, we'll play video. I mean, I usually get off first when we play video games. Like, I'm usually the first one to call it. And then him and Mook will stay on.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. You probably feel responsible as hell. Like, okay, boys, don't stay on too late.

[Ron]

Yeah, we played on Saturday night. We played late, and I think it was like 2am and Jerry. It was me, Mook, Jerry, and my buddy Peters.

[Francis Ellis]

And.

[Ron]

Yeah. And then Jerry just goes, boys, I got to be honest with you. I'm loving this session right now. I was like, I got to go to bed. It's way too late. Yeah. Yeah. Just buzzing. Apparently, Numbers is fighting a nasty fire.

[Francis Ellis]

Just saw that. Did you see that still photo of Nikki Numbers in front of a huge fire? Yeah. Like, billowing out of the window apparent.

[Ron]

Yeah. Jerry said he's been fighting it for 48 hours.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah. But he had time to post for a Picture.

[Dave]

Yeah, I was going to say I'm all. I'm all for it, but I've learned that their numbers is a bit of a scam artist.

[Ron]

Oh yeah, with. Not with the fires.

[Dave]

Maybe not. They.

[Ron]

I could mean the photo that he posted. There's a massive flame flying out of the window.

[Francis Ellis]

If you could find a way to. Yeah, look, there he is.

[Ron]

Yeah, there he is.

[Dave]

Is.

[Francis Ellis]

That's so crazy that they got it and it's hitting his face perfectly. That's why you get furious.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Cuz they're seeing action. I don't think they see all that. I think it's a lot of just hanging around.

[Francis Ellis]

Can't be on the game.

[Ron]

Oh, I don't know. I don't have no idea.

[Dave]

Jerry. They. They didn't bring his. They gave him the wrong baggage or something like that.

[Ron]

Yeah, yeah, I saw that.

[Dave]

Where?

[Ron]

Twitter. Oh yeah, they posted a video of him with the no pants on.

[Dave]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he texted our group. He's like, I got a disaster, everybody. I got no clothes.

[Francis Ellis]

What do they mean they gave him the wrong bag?

[Dave]

I don't know if they gave him the wrong bag or his bag just didn't arrive. But he didn't figure it out until we got to the hotel, which makes me think that he forgot a bag. He had the wrong golf bag. Do you know the story? Story?

[Ron]

No, no, I just saw the video.

[Dave]

Got it, Jerry. What do you mean?

[Ron]

What do you mean?

[Dave]

You got your pants.

[Ron]

You got no pants. You look good though. All said, come over here.

[Francis Ellis]

What you get on the airplane with?

[Dave]

Well, whatever the case may be.

[Ron]

Go to that picture.

[Dave]

Someone from the resort. Someone from the resort went all the way to the Tulsa airport and got his bag and brought it back.

[Ron]

Oh, nice.

[Dave]

And he was like, I got it. This woman doesn't have Zell. He's like, this woman doesn't have Zell. I can't give her a tip. Does anyone have any cash? I was like, I got cash. He's like, you got a lot of cash? I was like, yeah, I got a lot of cash. And he's like, you got 500? And I was like, I got 500. I give him 500 bucks and tips. Who to tip the woman.

[Ron]

The airport's an hour and a half away.

[Dave]

Went all the way to the airport to get him his bag and brought it back for him. And. And I give him 500 bucks and he sends me the money and then he goes, oh, Francis, you only gave me 400. And I'm like, oh, fuck. Sorry, hang on. And he goes. He goes, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. You gave me five. But that's. That's a Nicky Numbers special right there. Oh, it was great.

[Ron]

No, he said that Nikki Numbers called him. So Nicky Numbers has been playing a lot of video games. And. And he said that he called Jerry and he was like, I need a new monitor. And Jerry was like, oh, yeah, you. Like, you should definitely get one. And he's like, the problem is I just can't swing it right now. And he's like, so you're just calling me asking you to buy you a monitor? And then he said that now he wants a. He wants a PC. He wants a computer.

[Francis Ellis]

Did he buy a monitor? Buy him one.

[Ron]

No, but he said that he's got

[Francis Ellis]

to buy him one. He said, let's dig into the budget.

[Ron]

We can't.

[Francis Ellis]

Why?

[Ron]

Apparently, Numbers is banned from the budget. What?

[Francis Ellis]

No Numbers.

[Ron]

Apparently all numbers travel has to come straight. It has got to come from Jerry, no one else.

[Francis Ellis]

Well, let's get Jerry a PC.

[Ron]

Jerry's got a PC.

[Francis Ellis]

No, but I'm saying let's get Jerry a PC.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, I think they've worked on. They've tried that already.

[Francis Ellis]

Let's get Mooka PC.

[Ron]

Mook already has one.

[Francis Ellis]

Let's get Mooka PC.

[Ron]

I know they're working on it. They're working on getting Numbers One, but apparently the thing is that they don't know how to set it up trickle

[Francis Ellis]

down, you know what I mean? Nobody knows that Mook has a PC right now.

[Dave]

Dude, sometimes it really. I lose sense of this because we live in it. But I was telling a friend of mine recently, like, a story, and I was like, yeah, I was hanging out with Jersey Jerry, and he was telling me a story about Nicky Numbers. And Mook was laughing about it, and Lil Sass was like. And the guy was like, who are these fucking people?

[Francis Ellis]

Like, are you growing up on, like, a stoop in the 1930s? Are these news boys that you're dealing with? I mean, I think Jersey Jerry and

[Ron]

Nikki Numbers, the way that Numbers and Jerry talk about their childhood. Like, I think they did grow up on a stoop.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Ron]

Like, they all have nicknames. They've all. They've all got, like, all their buddies. They're like.

[Dave]

And it's all alliteration Nick. Alliterative Nick. Nicknames. Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Little Sass would play Mooka Play Francis. Did you. What was. Did no one ever hit you with, like. I mean, Fran is Franny Fudge. Franny Fudge. Yeah, that's nice.

[Dave]

Franny. Fudge.

[Francis Ellis]

Franny. Fettuccine.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Not Irish enough or not Italian enough, though. I was. I spent some time with some Polish folks this weekend.

[Ron]

Really?

[Francis Ellis]

I was squad deep with some. Some polls in Greenpoint. It really is a Polish there. Really? To Greenpoint?

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

That's hard to get there.

[Dave]

Neighborhood, it's tough to get to.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, there's some. There's like. What's that bakery around there that's like. That has a monster line. Like it wraps around the entire neighborhood. What could they be selling that's that good?

[Dave]

Do you need to do that right now? I'm so hungry. Okay.

[Francis Ellis]

You went. You put that Pringle in upside down.

[Ron]

Happens.

[Francis Ellis]

You're supposed to put the flavorful side right onto the tongue or otherwise you're wasting it all.

[Dave]

The real artistry of the Pringle is not the sushi, it's the rice.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah.

[Dave]

So you need to put the rice on your tongue. You got it all.

[Ron]

Don't matter how you eat it.

[Dave]

You are on a. I'm sorry. Please keep going.

[Francis Ellis]

There's no. There's no story here. I just spent some time with some. Some Polish people.

[Dave]

What are they like?

[Francis Ellis]

They're incredible. Except for their language. Just sounds like it's. It's like being rewound. It's like.

[Ron]

Oh, yeah, Icelandic.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, this is. But I mean, they're.

[Ron]

It sounds Icelandic, though.

[Francis Ellis]

They're. I think they just get a bad rap. The Italians and the Irish get soak up all the glory while the Polish people are the true backbone. The Italians and the Irish are just like flamboyant versions of the Polish. Polish people.

[Ron]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Simple right down the middle.

[Ron]

No, hard in the. In the Jersey.

[Francis Ellis]

Jerry's French Jersey.

[Dave]

Jerry spent some time with some Polish people on Wednesday at the office.

[Francis Ellis]

They did?

[Dave]

Yeah. They knew their way around a Pole.

[Francis Ellis]

The polls.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

Very nice.

[Dave]

What was I going to say? You. You've been on a Pringle run the likes of which the world has never seen. No.

[Ron]

These were in here.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, right.

[Dave]

Yeah. I wonder why.

[Ron]

Because I brought them in here and I never opened them.

[Dave]

Bingo. You. You've got like emergency Pringles stashes?

[Ron]

Yeah, pretty much. Much.

[Dave]

What's. What is it about Pringles that you like more than other. Anything else. Any other food? Why is it. Why is Pringles.

[Ron]

No, I mean, it's. I just like chips and they're the best chip.

[Dave]

Are they?

[Ron]

By a mile.

[Dave]

Better than, you know, kettle baked or whatever the. They're called.

[Francis Ellis]

Kettle cooked.

[Ron]

Kettle baked.

[Francis Ellis]

There's baked. There's not even no chips.

[Dave]

I feel like I just like couldn't even expose myself to the cartel. I meant. No, I know. I know where. I know it doesn't go in your nose.

[Francis Ellis]

You just gave yourself away, Mr. Ellis.

[Dave]

Oh, here, here. I'll try. Come on. Would a. Would a narc actually eat the Pringles?

[Ron]

No, I mean like, like, look, I like a good Lays. I like a good ruffle. Ruts.

[Francis Ellis]

Ruts.

[Dave]

There is Kettle cook. What was wrong with you?

[Francis Ellis]

Kettle baked. There's baked and there's Kettle Cook baked. It's like 50 less fat kettle cook.

[Ron]

I love a good la.

[Francis Ellis]

More fat.

[Ron]

A good lays baked. Nothing wrong with that. Yeah, but I know a lot of people are anti Lays. Specifically Big Cat.

[Dave]

Are they. They're too mass produced. Probably.

[Ron]

I don't know. We went Cape Cod.

[Dave]

I like. I like the Cape Codders.

[Francis Ellis]

There you go.

[Ron]

Cape Cod, of course, great. But Cape Cod, it's not a chip that you're just gonna casual like. That's. It's a very messy chip. Oh, that's Pringle. No dust.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, that's a clean one. That's probably.

[Ron]

It feels baked.

[Francis Ellis]

It has like a big quality to it.

[Ron]

Exactly.

[Francis Ellis]

But it is an. Also an orderly chip. You know how many Pringles you're going to get in the can every single time? It's not like you could. You could open up a Cape Cod. It could be 75 empty.

[Ron]

A little bit of air in here.

[Francis Ellis]

But Pringles, you're getting how many chips we think is in a Pringles?

[Ron]

If I had to guess, I would say 80 to 100 hundred.

[Francis Ellis]

We gotta count them out. I can't believe that there's any inconsistency. I thought it would be down to the number.

[Ron]

It has to be.

[Dave]

You know what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go find all your emergency Pringle stashes and I'm gonna shake the out of them.

[Ron]

Oh, that's fine. I don't mind.

[Dave]

Because you don't like messy. No, you said you didn't like them messy. That's what you like.

[Ron]

But if they're crushed up, you just drink them like it's like a fresh A cup.

[Dave]

You're not going to like that.

[Ron]

I've done it before. I'll do it again.

[Dave]

Yeah, in a pinch. Right. Which you can't do.

[Ron]

See, it looks like they've got the approximate amount or They've got approximately 60

[Francis Ellis]

chips in the Cape Cod bag. Cape cod, and there's 80 in the Pringles.

[Ron]

And I bet the Cape Cod costs more.

[Francis Ellis]

And it's a better quality chip in the Pringles. As far as the consistency of Pringle.

[Ron]

Nothing worse than when you get a bag of Pringle. You get a. You get a can of Pringles and they're all. They're all sideways ways. You're like, how did this happen? Can't even get him out.

[Dave]

Oh, man.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ron]

All right.

[Francis Ellis]

Yeah, right.

[Dave]

I think I need to go to bed 38 hours right now.

[Ron]

All right, thank you guys all for listening. We will be back on Thursday. Trying to think if I've got anything to promote Moat.

[Dave]

I don't. By the way, San Francisco was awesome. Thanks, everyone.

[Francis Ellis]

The videos of that venue looked sick.

[Ron]

It was like a deep room.

[Francis Ellis]

And it was. It looked packed.

[Ron]

It's huge. It's like 400.

[Dave]

Yeah.

[Francis Ellis]

What kind of entrees did they have there? They had fish and chips.

[Dave]

No, quite literally a great Cobb salad, which makes sense.

[Ron]

How ironic.

[Dave]

You'd have to nail.

[Ron]

Isn't it ironic getting into League of Legends? That's my new thing. Mac Bad.

[Dave]

No, you don't want to do that.

[Francis Ellis]

Why not?

[Ron]

Apparently it like, takes over your life.

[Dave]

Yeah. People who play that game don't. It's like the most epic game, right?

[Ron]

I don't know. It's just been around forever. People have been playing it for. So there's so many different characters and that you got to memorize. It's like a strategy game, Right? Would you call it that? It's like chess. But you play as one of the people. Yeah. Yeah.

[Dave]

Well said. He said it's like.

[Ron]

Well, he plays Dota just like similar.

[Dave]

What's that?

[Ron]

The game that he plays, Dota 2. You play what?

[Francis Ellis]

The man's version.

[Ron]

Man's. Oh, yeah. Dota 2. I looked up. I looked up his. What's harder? And they said dota. And I was like, I'm going with League.

[Dave]

What about fantasy? What's the one Something Fantasy.

[Francis Ellis]

Fantasy Football.

[Dave]

Final Fantasy. Is that a game that's like another.

[Ron]

Doesn't know what that is. You do not know what this game is, Francis.

[Dave]

What do you mean? Why don't I.

[Ron]

Because you didn't have a PlayStation 4.

[Dave]

Is that that they only started on 4.

[Ron]

It's.

[Dave]

That's what it looked like. It's been around since 1997, Harry.

[Ron]

You might be right. I might be.

[Dave]

Wow.

[Ron]

I might be a fool. Well, we already ended the episode. This isn't going in earlier.

[Francis Ellis]

You should have bailed.

[Ron]

All right. Goodbye,

[Dave]

Sam.