Episode 444 - Stars of "The Lost Weekend"

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Stars on Suspense (Old Time Radio)

Episode 444 – Stars of "The Lost Weekend"

Host: Mean Streets Podcasts
Date: March 19, 2026

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Overview

This episode celebrates the classic film The Lost Weekend and its Academy Award accolades by presenting a suite of “Suspense” radio dramas starring the film’s principal cast: Ray Milland, Jane Wyman, and Howard Da Silva. The episode also features a radio adaptation of The Lost Weekend itself and closes on a lighter note with a comedic spoof starring Ray Milland on The Jack Benny Program. It’s a tribute to both the movie’s enduring legacy and to the power of radio drama as a showcase for Hollywood’s finest.

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Featured Content and Segments

Host/Intro: Academy Awards Connection and Lineup

• [00:00-03:04]
  • The episode is part of a month-long series celebrating Best Picture Oscar winners. The Lost Weekend (1945) is the focus, highlighted for winning both the Oscar and the Palme d’Or at Cannes.
  • List of segments/stars:
    • Howard Da Silva in “You Take Ballistics”
    • Jane Wyman in “Catch Me If You Can”
    • Ray Milland in “Chicken Feed”
    • Milland & Wyman in the radio adaptation of The Lost Weekend (Screen Guild Theater)
    • Ray Milland on The Jack Benny Program spoofing the film

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Segment 1: “You Take Ballistics” starring Howard Da Silva

• [05:36-34:46]

Synopsis

Howard Da Silva plays Homicide Lieutenant Ed Harvey investigating the murder of Edmund Lombard. The suspect, Coleman, seems to be too clever for his own good, always one step ahead of the police, and his supposed alibi is undone in a clever twist involving ballistics and improvised ammunition.

Key Moments and Quotes

• Interrogation and Police Frustration
  • “He's wise, huh? Smart. Pretty smart. I don't like it.” – Da Silva as Lt. Harvey [08:19]
  • Ballistics twists: It is revealed that a .38 revolver can be used to fire a .32 slug, improvising with cigarette papers.
  • “You take ballistics, I'll take human nature every time.” — Da Silva (Harvey) [31:51]
• Memorable Turn
  • Coleman is too calm and precise in his answers, unnerving the detectives.
  • Lt. Harvey’s dogged police work cracks the case through an experiment – a clever “aha!” moment for listeners and a classic moment in radio crime drama.

Notable Technique

• The program expertly uses the tension between scientific forensics (ballistics) and classic intuition/experience-driven police work for suspense.

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Segment 2: “Catch Me If You Can” starring Jane Wyman

• [37:09-62:27]

Synopsis

Jane Wyman stars as Margot Weatherby, a woman snowbound in a mountain inn, whose husband dies suddenly—by her hand. Paranoia and guilt escalate as a mysterious “Rocky Rhodes” (a detective) seems to draw near, and a suite of suspicious guests become threats or red herrings.

Key Moments and Quotes

• Establishing Paranoia:
  • “Let me tell you. Let me talk as long as I can. It's my last chance to explain about Phil and all the trouble I had afterwards.” – Jane Wyman [37:09]
  • The cat-and-mouse with various guests and Margot’s growing paranoia is classic suspense.
• Final Confrontation
  • “Miss Rocky Rhodes, I presume.” – Wyman as Margot, realizing the truth [57:21]
• Twist Ending
  • The real Rocky Rhodes is revealed, and Margot, fatally injured, is consumed by guilt and confusion.

Tone

• A masterclass in unreliable narration, with Wyman’s performance vacillating between false confidence and slipping sanity.

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Segment 3: “Chicken Feed” starring Ray Milland

• [65:40-94:50]

Synopsis

Ray Milland plays Ralph Clark, whose life spins out of control after a petty argument with his wife over a nickel. He’s swept up in a small-town police misunderstanding, is jailed, and unwittingly becomes accomplice in a jailbreak. The story escalates through misunderstandings and ever-ratcheting tension.

Key Moments and Quotes

• The Nickel as MacGuffin:
  • “A nickel. A measly, worthless nickel... but of course, that was only the beginning.” – Ray Milland as Clark [66:53]
• Kafkaesque Police Encounter:
  • “You're holding me on suspicion? Suspicion of what?” – Milland as Clark [72:50]
• Resolution & Irony:
  • A nickel literally saves Clark’s life, stopping a bullet.
  • “I'd had it all the time.” – Milland’s realization [91:39]

Notable Technique

• The story turns a trivial sum into deadly serious stakes, blending noir and dark comedy.

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Segment 4: “The Lost Weekend” (Screen Guild Theater)

Ray Milland & Jane Wyman

• [94:59–124:06]

Synopsis

A faithful, emotional radio adaptation of the celebrated film. Milland reprises Don Birnam, a writer destroyed by alcoholism, and Wyman is Helen, his loving but desperate partner. The narrative follows Don’s bender, hallucinations, and the hope of recovery.

Key Moments and Quotes

• Milland’s iconic performance captures the agony and self-loathing of addiction:
  • “I'm not a drinker. I'm a drunk.” – Milland as Don [102:48]
  • “There are two of us, you know. Don the writer and Don the drunk.” [104:10]
• Wyman’s empathy and resolve:
  • “You can be cured.” – Wyman’s Helen [103:11]
  • “I'm gonna fight and fight and fight and don't try and argue.” [105:02]
• The "vicious circle"/cycle of addiction is dramatized in sound and dialogue:
  • “Let me have my little vicious circle...” – Milland [95:30]

Notable Moment

• The story ends ambiguously, capturing the film’s spirit and leaving Don’s fate an open question.

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Segment 5: The Jack Benny Program — Ray Milland Spoofs “The Lost Weekend”

• [126:00–153:07]

Synopsis

Ray Milland guests as himself, joined by Mary Livingston and Phil Harris in a comic send-up of The Lost Weekend. Jack Benny insists on top billing and attempts to play the lead, but Milland steals the show with his Oscar-winning credentials and dry wit.

Memorable Moments and Quotes

• Milland’s Oscar:
  • “By coincidence, I just happen to have it with me, weighs 25 pounds.” – Ray Milland [130:20]
• Benny’s Ego:
  • “Just because you won an Academy Award has nothing to do with it. When I was your age, I could have won an Oscar too... Except there were no Academy Awards in those days.” [134:32]
• The parody is full of in-jokes and affectionate ribbing of Hollywood’s awards culture.
• The “radio remake” involves Jack and Ray as twin brothers, both fighting for Wyman’s affection, encountering pink elephants and increasingly surreal scenarios.

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Notable Style and Tone

• Language & Tone: The episode fluidly shifts from noir grit (in the suspense segments), to psychological drama (in The Lost Weekend), to madcap comic parody (in the Benny segment). Dialogue is sharp, era-authentic, and frequently self-aware.
• Structure: Each segment is introduced with historical and celebrity context, emphasizing the era’s “theater of the mind” richness.

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Important Timestamps

• [00:00–03:04] — Introduction and lineup
• [05:36–34:46] — Howard Da Silva in “You Take Ballistics”
• [37:09–62:27] — Jane Wyman in “Catch Me If You Can”
• [65:40–94:50] — Ray Milland in “Chicken Feed”
• [94:59–124:06] — The Lost Weekend (Screen Guild Theater) with Milland & Wyman
• [126:00–153:07] — Jack Benny Program: Ray Milland’s Spoof

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Closing Remarks and Legacy

• The episode stands as a tribute to The Lost Weekend’s historic Oscar win and its stark depiction of addiction—applauded for “a story like The Lost Weekend... brought to the screen,” affirming Hollywood's coming of age (Charles Brackett, Screen Guild Theater).
• The classic radio dramas exemplify both Hollywood’s enduring legacy and the golden age of radio artistry.
• Memorable for contemporary listeners as a time capsule of old Hollywood, rich in vintage suspense, performances, and humor.

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Listen If You Enjoy

• Old time radio drama and Hollywood history
• Classic film and theater stars at their radio best
• Both somber psychological tales and the lighter side of celebrity parody

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Transcript

[Narrator/Host]

Would you hand me that, please? Thank you. Now, let's see. Survey. Survive. Susanna. Suspect. Ah, here we are. Suspense. Meaning held in doubt, expressing doubt. The state of being uncertain, undecided or insecure. State of anxious expectation or waiting for information such as to keep one in suspense. Therefore delay acquainting him with what he is eager to know. Suspense. Hello and welcome to Stars on Suspense with more Hollywood legends and radio's outstanding theater of thrills. All this month in honor of the

[Jane Wyman]

Academy Awards, we're spotlighting films that took

[Narrator/Host]

home the Oscar for Best Picture. And this week's winner is the Lost Weekend. Billy Wilder's hard hitting drama about a writer and his battle against the bottle, the unflinching depiction of alcoholism, earned its star, Ray Miland, an Oscar for Best Actor. It also won Oscars for Billy Wilder as director and for Wilder and Charles Brackett's screenplay. Along with its best picture win, the Lost Weekend also took the top prize at the Cannes Film Festival, making it

[Jane Wyman]

one of only four films to win

[Narrator/Host]

the top trophies at both Cannes and the Oscars. The others are Marty and recent best picture winners, Parasite and Enora.

[Jane Wyman]

The Lost Weekend can be bought or

[Narrator/Host]

rented digitally and it's available on Blu

[Howard Da Silva]

Ray from Kino Lorber.

[Narrator/Host]

Today we'll hear Ray Milland and two of his co stars, Jane Wyman and Howard Da Silva, all in episodes of Suspense.

[Jane Wyman]

And we'll hear Mr. Milland and Ms.

[Narrator/Host]

Wyman recreate their film roles in a production of the Lost Weekend from the Screen Guild Theater. First up is Howard Da Silva who plays Milan's bartender of choice. He stars in you take ballistics from March 13, 1947. Then it's Jane Wyman who plays Milan's long suffering girlfriend.

[Jane Wyman]

We'll hear her in Catch Me if

[Narrator/Host]

youf can from February 17, 1949.

[Jane Wyman]

And then Ray Millan himself stars in

[Narrator/Host]

chicken feed from September 8, 1949. We'll hear the Lost Weekend courtesy of the Screen guild theater from January 7, 1946.

[Jane Wyman]

And to close on a lighter note, Ray Milland joins the Jack Benny program

[Howard Da Silva]

fresh off his Oscar win to spoof

[Narrator/Host]

the movie in an episode from March 10, 1946. Get ready to get Lost with the

[Jane Wyman]

stars of the Lost Weekend.

[Howard Da Silva]

We'll kick things off with Howard Da

[Narrator/Host]

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[Jane Wyman]

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[Narrator/Host]

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[Jane Wyman]

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[Narrator/Host]

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[Howard Da Silva]

Yes, Roma wines taste better because only Roma selects from the world's greatest wine reserves for your pleasure. And now, Roma Wines R O M A Roma Wines present Suspense.

[Narrator/Host]

Tonight, Roma wines bring you Mr. Howard de Silva. In you take. Ballistics, a suspense play produced, edited and

[Howard Da Silva]

directed for Roma Wines by William Speer. Suspense Radio's outstanding theater of thrills is presented for your enjoyments by Roma Wines. That's R O M A Roma Wines, those better tasting California wines enjoyed by more Americans than any other wine. For friendly entertaining, for delightful dining. Yes, right now a glass full would be very pleasant as Roma Wines bring you Howard De Silva as Homicide Lieutenant Ed Harvey in new Take Ballistics, Cornell Woolrich's remarkable study of the police mind

[Narrator/Host]

at work, which is tonight's tale of suspense.

[Howard Da Silva]

By this time it was night, pretty late. I walked down toward the apartment on the opposite side of the street like I had a dozen times before that day. This time I had to count the doorways I knew Cass was on the 10th one down from the corner. I knew he was there, but I knew I'd never see him. Was too dark. Cass was a lot too smart.

[Narrator/Host]

Hi, Lieutenant.

[Howard Da Silva]

He made any moves yet?

[Narrator/Host]

Not a move.

[Howard Da Silva]

How about the back way?

[Narrator/Host]

No, Peters is covering that. He'd leave us now anyway, you know. He's still up there Every little while. You can see his shadow against the shade there. See?

[Howard Da Silva]

Hey, look, you got a match? Oh, sure.

[Narrator/Host]

Here. Hey, Lieutenant, did you get any orders or did we just stick around? Myself, I think he's settling down for the night.

[Howard Da Silva]

No, this isn't getting us any place. I'm gonna make the pinch now. Come on up with me, see what we got.

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. Oh, boy, it's good to stretch. My gams were killing me.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, I know. I've done plenty of stakeouts myself. Anyway, it was warm tonight.

[Narrator/Host]

That's a help. Yeah, that's always a help. Hey, you know what I think, Lieutenant?

[Howard Da Silva]

What?

[Narrator/Host]

I think that guy's waiting for something or someone. Like who?

[Howard Da Silva]

Us. He's wise, huh? Smart. Pretty smart. I don't like it.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes, sir. Gents.

[Howard Da Silva]

Coleman. Clarence Coleman. Take us up.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes, sir.

[Howard Da Silva]

I need a shave.

[Narrator/Host]

Nah, you don't look bad.

[Howard Da Silva]

How long has he been living here? You. How long has the Coleman been living here?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, Mr. Coleman. Two or three years. Second door.

[Howard Da Silva]

You know the way. What a dump, huh? Hey, no, no, no, no. Okay. No gun. He won't give us any trouble. He's too smart. Your name Coleman? Yeah, from headquarters.

[Narrator/Host]

Okay. You want to come in or you just want to talk to me where you are?

[Howard Da Silva]

We want to talk to you downtown, but first we want to come in.

[Narrator/Host]

Come on in. Nobody's stopping.

[Howard Da Silva]

Look around. Cat?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. Suppose you guys got a search warrant.

[Howard Da Silva]

I suppose you got a witness that we don't. Go ahead.

[Narrator/Host]

Look, I just want you to know I'm not dumb, that's all.

[Howard Da Silva]

Sure, I know you're smart.

[Narrator/Host]

I was doing a crossword puzzle. You don't mind, do you?

[Howard Da Silva]

Go right ahead.

[Narrator/Host]

I want to get that one down before I forgot.

[Howard Da Silva]

Crash. You find it?

[Narrator/Host]

Nah.

[Howard Da Silva]

Do you own a gun?

[Narrator/Host]

Why, sure.

[Howard Da Silva]

Where is it?

[Narrator/Host]

Tell them to look in the bottom

[Howard Da Silva]

drawer of the bureau.

[Narrator/Host]

And they're under my winter underwear.

[Howard Da Silva]

Did you hear that, Cass?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. I got a license for it, too.

[Howard Da Silva]

You fired it lately?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, sure thing. I got it. Here she is. Luton. Forgot she don't rub off any prints.

[Howard Da Silva]

I told you, we're smart. Maybe too smart. 38. One shell gone. When did you fire it last?

[Narrator/Host]

Right last. Night. Why should I lie to you? You're gonna give me the night trace test as soon as you get me downtown anyway, right?

[Howard Da Silva]

Last night, huh? Right into Edmund Lombard's body.

[Narrator/Host]

Wrong end of the floor here.

[Howard Da Silva]

You got all the answers, haven't you?

[Narrator/Host]

I only know what I know. Can't do better than that for my own brother. If you fired it into the floor, where's the crease? See that little scatter rug? Just kick it aside.

[Howard Da Silva]

See it.

[Narrator/Host]

I can do better than a crease. Dig in with your pen knife, you can probably get the slug. Well, let's have a look.

[Howard Da Silva]

Hey, hey, hey. What are you doing that for, Cass? This guy just making a chump out of you.

[Narrator/Host]

Maybe.

[Howard Da Silva]

But we better have the slug just the same, Lieutenant. All right, you take your hands out of your pockets and get your favorite hat and start moving toward the door. You're coming with us.

[Narrator/Host]

Ah, There we are. OK by me.

[Howard Da Silva]

You get it?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, it's a.38, all right. Am I under arrest?

[Howard Da Silva]

Well, have you got to have a name for it? No, not yet. You're just a guest of the department for the rest of the night.

[Narrator/Host]

Get the works, I suppose.

[Howard Da Silva]

Cass, take him down the stairs, will you? I want to talk to this kid on the elevator for a minute.

[Narrator/Host]

All right.

[Howard Da Silva]

Hey. Hey, wait a second. You got any more of that gum?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. Here.

[Howard Da Silva]

Sure, Lieutenant.

[Narrator/Host]

There you are. Come on, you. Yes, sir.

[Howard Da Silva]

Got a match?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, sure.

[Howard Da Silva]

I have

[Narrator/Host]

the gun.

[Howard Da Silva]

Go up anywhere in this building last night, sir?

[Narrator/Host]

He's did.

[Howard Da Silva]

Who's Coleman?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. The people downstairs telephone me, so I had to go up there.

[Howard Da Silva]

He fired into the floor by mistake.

[Narrator/Host]

He was plenty scared. Hey, he in trouble?

[Howard Da Silva]

Nothing serious. Just a little thing called murder. For suspense.

[Narrator/Host]

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[Howard Da Silva]

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[Narrator/Host]

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[Howard Da Silva]

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[Narrator/Host]

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[Howard Da Silva]

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[Narrator/Host]

And now, Roma wines.

[Howard Da Silva]

Bring back to our Hollywood soundstage, Howard

[Narrator/Host]

De Silva as Homicide Lieutenant Ed Harvey.

[Howard Da Silva]

In you take ballistics.

[Narrator/Host]

A tale well calculated to keep you in suspense.

[Howard Da Silva]

I've been on the force for quite a while and I've. I made my shares of arrests, big and small, little punks and chiselers and big time racket men and crazy wild eyed killers. I never made a pinch that looked better and that I liked less than Ms. Coleman. We had everything we. We had to make the pinch. And I knew it was going to turn sour the minute I walked into that apartment and I saw a murder rap or something. Well, I personally don't care. We didn't take him downtown. We took him over to a little precinct house up on the west side. We didn't book him. We just tossed him in the back room and let him wait. Leffinger, my boss, got there about 10 minutes later.

[Narrator/Host]

Did you bring him in?

[Howard Da Silva]

Yes, sir. He's in back. Here's his gun. He claims it went off into the floor last night by mistake.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, feed us to the paraffine test, huh? Well, he could have framed it that way after he killed Lombard.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, he could have.

[Narrator/Host]

There's a slug, Captain. 38. Yeah.

[Howard Da Silva]

Turn the stuff over to ballistics. Yes, sir. Hey, Cass.

[Narrator/Host]

Huh?

[Howard Da Silva]

Give me a light, will you?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. Okay.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah. Any report on the one they dug out of Lombard?

[Narrator/Host]

Probably on its way. Now, who are these two guys?

[Howard Da Silva]

The night elevator man that took him up to Lombard's apartment and the night counterman at a lunchroom about half a block away.

[Narrator/Host]

They recognize him?

[Howard Da Silva]

Positive.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, let's go to work, Sergeant. Yes, sir. We want to spring these witnesses on them. One buzz sending the elevator man, two

[Howard Da Silva]

buzzes the other guy. Okay, Captain. You think you'll sweat?

[Narrator/Host]

You?

[Howard Da Silva]

No. Hi, Coleman. Sit over there. Sure. Put the light on him, o'. Farrell. Yes, sir.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, Coleman. Suppose you tell us what you did last night. Beginning when?

[Howard Da Silva]

Beginning when you left your apartment.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, I went out about 9 o', clock, walked over to 23rd and 7th. There's a cigar store there. I made a phone call. Who to?

[Howard Da Silva]

Edmund Lombard.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, so you did contact Lombard.

[Howard Da Silva]

Sure did.

[Narrator/Host]

I say different. Go ahead. You know Lombard's racket. You tell us. Collected bets on the nags. Only the long shots. He wouldn't turn in. They never came in anyway. So who knows the difference? Only this one time, I get a tip on one that comes in 20 to 1. Lombard can't cover. He lambs. I just catch up with him last night on the phone. I tell him I want my dough. I tell him to meet me in an hour.

[Howard Da Silva]

Did he meet you?

[Narrator/Host]

I didn't give him a chance. I went up to his place.

[Howard Da Silva]

You went up to his place?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. Percentage for me to lie. I know you got me placed up there. So you went up to his place? Yeah. He was already packing, getting ready to lamb again. He kind of laughed and said, you can't blame a guy for trying. I said, I want my two grand. Okay, he said, you win. He asked me for a receipt so I can't come at him again. Fair enough. So I write one out for him on the hotel stationery. We'll wind it up. Let's see how good you can make it.

[Howard Da Silva]

That's all.

[Narrator/Host]

So he begins unpacking and figures he might just as well stay where he is now. And I leave. So that's how it was. Sure. You didn't leave out anything? No. Why'd you leave out about killing him? Because it belongs out. Because I didn't.

[Howard Da Silva]

You. You didn't have a gun on you when you went up there?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, yeah, sure I did. Why'd you take a gun if you didn't plan to shoot him? So he wouldn't pull one on me. You think a guy like Eddie Lombard's gonna cough up two grand just like that? Don't lie to us when we bring you in here. We want the truth. You shot him first and collected your dough afterwards. And then you wrote out your receipt to a dead man. No. That's how it happened, isn't it? No. Answer me. Isn't it? No. No. Cass. Yeah, captain? Never mind. Those witnesses, he spiked them for us. Come on in here and give us a hand. Sure. Okay, bring him out of it. All right, Come on. Come on. Come on. Will you get up there. Why don't we give you something to pass out about now? Why'd you tell him? You listening? Why'd you tell the night man that Lombard was staying and not to bother about his luggage? Because I was afraid he'd go up there and Lombard might think it was me again and take a shot at him.

[Howard Da Silva]

Because he was dead in there. And you wanted to get clear of the building before he was found.

[Narrator/Host]

If I did, I didn't go very far. Far? I stayed in the coffee shop down the block for 15 or 20 minutes

[Howard Da Silva]

after look what you do with the money you took off him after you killed him.

[Narrator/Host]

The dough he gave me put it in the bank first thing this morning. Takeover. Cash. All right. Come on, Harvey.

[Howard Da Silva]

No, no, wait. I wash my hands. You know, I need a shave.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, come on. Come on.

[Howard Da Silva]

See you later, Cass. Yeah.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. All right.

[Howard Da Silva]

Coleman, come on now.

[Narrator/Host]

Why don't you be. You know, if I'd hang around there much longer, I'd be level of hurt him.

[Howard Da Silva]

You see what I mean?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. How come nobody heard this shot?

[Howard Da Silva]

People next door were out and down below, they were asleep.

[Narrator/Host]

You know, I don't like it. You notice how he beats us to the punch every time? We got witnesses for everything except the

[Howard Da Silva]

killer, which all adds up. But we got nothing but circumstantial. Wouldn't stand up in court five minutes.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, maybe ballistics will tie it up for us.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, maybe.

[Narrator/Host]

What's the matter, don't you believe in ballistics?

[Howard Da Silva]

Sure, but you heard the guy. He's got every other angle covered. Not gonna slip up on anything as obvious as ballistics.

[Narrator/Host]

Don't you think he's guilty?

[Howard Da Silva]

I think he's guilty. I went back up to Coleman's apartment. I hate this part of any job. There's always the off chance that it may turn up something, so it has to be done. But nine times out of 10, it doesn't get you a thing. Didn't this time either. It's a lot of junk in the living room. Items. Crossword puzzle he'd been working on. A pencil stub, the butt of the cigarette he'd been smoking. And the package of kitchen came out of the bathroom. Items. Usual assorted stuff in the medicine cabinet. And 15 rusty razor blades under the bathtub. Kitchen items. Three empty beer bottles and some very lively cockroaches. Assorted sizes, a bedroom. Items. A bureau full of linen and three suits in the closet. One of them was the grain number he'd been wearing the night he called on Lombard. There was nothing in the pockets of but a Canadian dime a faded snapshot of a faded blonde and a book of cigarette paper. I put the stuff from his pockets in a regulation brown envelope for no very good reason. Went back to the precinct. Lavender was still there, biting his nails.

[Narrator/Host]

Heard you get anything?

[Howard Da Silva]

If I did, I don't know. How's he doing?

[Narrator/Host]

How's he doing?

[Howard Da Silva]

How are we doing?

[Narrator/Host]

Lousy.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, so far.

[Narrator/Host]

You're still sure of him, huh?

[Howard Da Silva]

I was never sure of a pinch in my life.

[Narrator/Host]

Listen, I'm gonna let it go through on Circumstantial. Ballistics will be sure to match his gun to the slug that killed Lombard. And that's enough to do it without anything else. I don't know. Say, what are you Dr. Yeah? Yeah, this is Leffinger. Well, it's about time. Well, you knew where to reach me. I told you I was gonna bring him out here. Yeah.

[Howard Da Silva]

What?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, okay. Ballistics. Coleman's gun was a.38.

[Howard Da Silva]

I know that.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, you know that. Well, then maybe you know that the slug they took out of Lombard is a.32. So now what do you know?

[Howard Da Silva]

That does it.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, it does it, all right.

[Howard Da Silva]

No, I don't mean that. I mean, he's our meat. He's the guy. You can't tell me different.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm not telling you different, but Ballistics is, and Ballistics don't lie.

[Howard Da Silva]

You setting yourself up above Ballistics? You take ballistics, I'll take human nature. That don't lie either.

[Narrator/Host]

If you mean he did it with a.32 and then ditched it, you're wrong. Because we checked.

[Howard Da Silva]

All I know, I. I know he didn't. Otherwise, he. He wouldn't have shot that slug into the floor.

[Narrator/Host]

But the slug in the floor was a.38.

[Howard Da Silva]

Listen, Captain, I've called on Alderman Yen and state representatives and. But even they get a little scared when you say headquarters. But not this guy. He was waiting for us. He was calm. He was doing crossword puzzles. He was too calm. Now he's too smart. He's got everything covered. He's been ahead of us all the way. He's our guy. I tell you, he's our guy.

[Narrator/Host]

He's our guy. He's our guy. Well, go on out and prove it, then.

[Howard Da Silva]

All right. Don't take it out on me, Cap. I feel as bad about it as you do.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, well, you're the guy with all the big ideas. Go out and do something about it.

[Howard Da Silva]

All right. How long will you give me?

[Narrator/Host]

Tomorrow morning? You can't hold them forever without booking them, you know. Tomorrow morning?

[Howard Da Silva]

What am I going to do at this time? Look, make it known, huh? Give me a chance anyhow.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, noon. And I'm stretching it for you.

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, thanks, Cat.

[Narrator/Host]

Listen, Wait a minute. You're not holding out on me, are you?

[Howard Da Silva]

I wish I was. I don't know a thing more than you do, Captain. I just know it's gotta be our way, that's all.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, gotta be.

[Howard Da Silva]

Hey, I. I think I'll take another look at him before I go.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, now, listen, Carla, we know you did it. Why don't you make it easy for yourself? Make it easy for you coppers, you mean. I know you guys. Anything for a pinch. What do you care if you got the wrong guy? All right. Okay.

[Howard Da Silva]

Okay, Cass, you can lay off.

[Narrator/Host]

You got something? Yeah.

[Howard Da Silva]

The slug that killed Lombard was a.32. His gun is a.38. All right, throw him in a cell. We'll probably have to turn them loose in the morning.

[Narrator/Host]

Morning? What's the matter with tonight?

[Howard Da Silva]

What's the matter? Don't you like it here?

[Narrator/Host]

All right. But you'll have a sweet case of false arrest on your hands by morning. Remember that copper when you're back pounding a beat.

[Howard Da Silva]

Oh, I won't forget. You're smart. Got a match? Go and have a cigarette.

[Narrator/Host]

I got my own.

[Howard Da Silva]

Go ahead, have one.

[Narrator/Host]

I wouldn't take a smoke from a copper if it was the last one before I die.

[Howard Da Silva]

You may have a chance to prove that someday.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah?

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, when you go to the electric chair. Well, that sounded good, but I wasn't too sure. They say every criminal makes at least one mistake. But I wasn't too sure of that either. All I was sure of was that he'd done it. So there had to be some way to prove it. At first I went back to his apartment. I went over the joint with a fine tooth comb.

[Narrator/Host]

Nothing.

[Howard Da Silva]

Then I thought of that suit in the closet. I got it out. I went over an inch by inch, turned the pockets inside out. Right there was where I found something that gave me an idea. Or rather, it was what I didn't find that I showed.

[Narrator/Host]

Should have.

[Howard Da Silva]

I went out to Coleman's kitchen. I made a pot of black coffee and I sat down to think. And the more I thought, the better I liked it. Might not mean a thing, it might even be possible. But it was all I had. So. So the next stop was headquarters and the pistol range in the basement. By the time I got through, it was daylight at a quarter seven. I was waiting outside that cigar store, 23rd and 7th where Coleman Amanda's phone call to Lombard. It was run by a little guy named Truehawk. We questioned him before, but this was different. Story wasn't open yet. Finally, after what seemed at least an hour and a half, I saw him. Saw Trewho come puffing down the street.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, well, lieutenant, you're the real early bird, huh?

[Howard Da Silva]

You're late.

[Narrator/Host]

Late, he says. What time you want a cigar store? Should open the middle of the night.

[Howard Da Silva]

Come on. Come on, let's go inside. I want to ask you A couple of things. Ah, more questions.

[Narrator/Host]

Didn't you ask me already everything but my grandmother's middle name?

[Howard Da Silva]

Yeah, I forgot that. That's why I came back.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, all right.

[Howard Da Silva]

So now, what about this Coleman when he was in here?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure, sure. He telephoned from the booth back there. How can I hear what he says way up here?

[Howard Da Silva]

I don't care about that now. He used to buy smokes from you though, you said?

[Narrator/Host]

That's right. Every day, Almost.

[Howard Da Silva]

Any particular brand?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. Always the same for two years.

[Howard Da Silva]

These, These here, always machine made. Cigarette?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, yes.

[Jane Wyman]

Why not?

[Howard Da Silva]

What did he buy from you the night he was in here phoning?

[Narrator/Host]

Heard the same. Why not?

[Howard Da Silva]

You're sure he. He didn't buy these way?

[Narrator/Host]

Yes. If I didn't see them in your

[Jane Wyman]

hand, I would never remember.

[Narrator/Host]

Cigarette papers for change, he said to cut down expenses. He said it was the first time

[Howard Da Silva]

he ever bought them. Did he buy any loose tobacco to go with him?

[Narrator/Host]

Let me see. Why, I think he didn't ask me, so I figured he's got some already.

[Howard Da Silva]

Okay, okay, you can give me some now.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, sure thing.

[Howard Da Silva]

Give me some matches, will you?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure, sure. Help yourself. Say, what is it all of a sudden with you, Lieutenant? She looked like she just swallowed the cat that ate the canary.

[Howard Da Silva]

You're all right, Pop. And I'm gonna fix you up.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah?

[Howard Da Silva]

Yep, to be a witness of a nice big murder trial.

[Narrator/Host]

Free.

[Howard Da Silva]

I went back to the precinct, but Leffinger had moved him to another one over on the east side on account of the 24 hour detention law. That took more time to locate him. But that was one thing I had plenty of. I was either in with what I had or I was out. Suddenly I felt tired. I felt tired as an old dog. I tried breakfast, but that didn't help much. So I went on over to the east side. Leftinger was right on deck, cranky as ever, but I could see he was worried. We had this guy pretty nearly 48 hours and the cops don't like to break the law any more than the next guy.

[Narrator/Host]

But where you been all night, bright eyes? You look like you slept on a park bench.

[Howard Da Silva]

I didn't sleep any place. I've been using my brains. Why did you leave word you were going to move him?

[Narrator/Host]

What's the difference? His next move is out.

[Howard Da Silva]

His next move is a. Raymond, after what I'm going to show you.

[Narrator/Host]

Great, great. I'm just in the mood for lantern slide.

[Howard Da Silva]

Let's have him in, huh?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, bring him in, Johnson. Okay, Captain.

[Howard Da Silva]

Now look First, I want you to watch how he rolls a cigarette.

[Narrator/Host]

What'll be doing now, playing parlor games?

[Howard Da Silva]

Just.

[Jane Wyman]

Just.

[Howard Da Silva]

Just watch him, that's all. And remember, I found these cigarette papers in the pocket of a suit. A suit he wore the night he went to see Lombard.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, I suppose he gassed them to

[Howard Da Silva]

death with cheap tobacco.

[Narrator/Host]

There he is, Captain. Oh, the Rover Boy. You guys woke me up just to

[Howard Da Silva]

move me to another hideout.

[Narrator/Host]

Why don't you get wise to yourselves? You know you're gonna have to book me or turn me loose sooner or later. All right, all right. Forget it. We're turning you loose. All we want to do is to sign a waiver that nothing happened to you in here. Not I sign nothing.

[Howard Da Silva]

Hey, take it easy, will you? We got the guy that did it.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, yeah.

[Howard Da Silva]

Got nothing to worry about. We just don't want any suits for false arrest, that's all. Now, when you took the words right

[Narrator/Host]

out of my mouth, copper, because my first stop after here is a lawyer.

[Howard Da Silva]

Now, wait a minute. Wait a minute.

[Narrator/Host]

Let's.

[Howard Da Silva]

Let's talk this over. Smoke?

[Narrator/Host]

Nah, not one of them things.

[Howard Da Silva]

Will you smoke these? Don't you?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, sure.

[Howard Da Silva]

Here's some tobacco. Go ahead, roll one.

[Narrator/Host]

Thanks.

[Howard Da Silva]

That's not the way.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm a little out of practice.

[Howard Da Silva]

A little out of practice, he says. Don't look to me like he never wrote one before in his life. Is it to you, Cap?

[Narrator/Host]

All right, so send me to the

[Howard Da Silva]

chair for that just the same. He bought these cigarette papers the night he went to see Lombard at the cigar store where he phoned, where he bought all his smokes. First time in two years he ever bought any. I know. Tobacco to go with him. And not a shred of loose tobacco in any of his pockets. Now, why do you suppose he bought those cigarette papers that night, huh?

[Narrator/Host]

You're telling it. I'm listening.

[Howard Da Silva]

Are you listening, Coleman?

[Narrator/Host]

You're talking in your sleep.

[Howard Da Silva]

I'll tell you why I bought him. Tell him that. I'll show you why. Let me have your gun a minute, will you, Captain?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, sure.

[Howard Da Silva]

That's.38, right?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah.

[Howard Da Silva]

Same caliber as Coleman's gun?

[Narrator/Host]

Right. All right.

[Howard Da Silva]

Now, here's a.32 caliber bullet. The same caliber as the slug that killed Lombard. Do you want to see it?

[Narrator/Host]

I know a.32 when I see it. All right.

[Howard Da Silva]

Now we take the.38 bullets out of your gun. Now, we take this.32 bullet and about. About three of these cigarette papers. We double them over, we wrap them around the bullet. See how snug the.32 fits in the.38 gun now. Now watch. Now watch how a.38 gun will fire a.32 bullet. I'll put it in the baseboard over there. That's ballistics, cap. How do you like it?

[Narrator/Host]

Ballistics? Ballistics.

[Howard Da Silva]

You take ballistics? I'll take human nature every time. Three months later, Coleman went to the chair. Whether he took a cigarette from a copper or not before he died, I don't know and I don't care. Suspense Presented by Roma WINES R O M A Roma America's favorite wines. This is Truman Bradley bringing back to our microphone the star of tonight's suspense play, Howard Da Silva. My compliments, Howard, on a grand performance. So tell me, how did you like being on the side of Law and Order for a change on the screen? I've seen you is a pretty tough character, Truman. I much prefer to be law abiding. Makes me more popular with my friends. Well, here's something, Howard, that will make you even more popular with your guests. A gift basket of Roma wines from Roma, your host of the evening. My thanks to Roma Troman. This is my idea of real hospitality. That's what your friends will say, Howard. When you treat them to the golden amber fragrant Roma California Sherry in your gift bas basket. For Roma Sherry, with its tempting nut like taste. Is the perfect first call for dinner. And served with nuts, fruit cake or any tasty snack. Roma Sherry is a truly delightful wine

[Narrator/Host]

for entertaining any time.

[Howard Da Silva]

Right, Truman? Roma Sherry is certainly a versatile wine. Versatile is the word for Roma Sherry, Howard. And extra good too for Roma. Sherry, like all Roma wines, gives you an important difference. And extra goodness in fuller bouquet. Richer body and better taste. And the best proof I can give you that Roma wines taste better. Is the fact that more Americans enjoy Roma than any other wine. Well, that's proof enough for me, Truman. And now, who's on suspense next week? Well, Howard, it's Claude Rains, my favorite actor. Yes, Claude Rains. And a very unusual suspense story. Mr. Rains will be entirely alone. No other member of the castle. A real solo performance. The story will be a famous English study in terror.

[Narrator/Host]

The wax work.

[Howard Da Silva]

And you'll want to hear what it feels like to spend the night in a museum. Haunted by the spirits of famous murderers of the past. That I've got to listen to. Thank you and good night. Howard De Silva appeared through the courtesy of Paramount Pictures. And is currently being seen in their

[Narrator/Host]

production Blaze of Noon.

[Howard Da Silva]

Tonight's suspense play was written by Robert Richards. From the story by Cornell Woolrich. Next Thursday, same Time you will hear

[Narrator/Host]

Mr. Claude rains as star of suspense

[Howard Da Silva]

produced and directed by William Speer for the Roma Wine Company of Fresno, California. Buy your share of Easter happiness. Bring new life and hope to crippled children through Easter seals. Buy Easter seals today. This is cbs, the Columbia broadcasting System.

[Narrator/Host]

And now, Auto light and its 60,000 dealers and service stations present Suspense.

[Howard Da Silva]

Tonight, Autolight brings you the Academy Award nominee Ms. Jane Wyman in a dramatization

[Narrator/Host]

of the outstanding mystery novel, catch me if you can, a suspense play produced and directed by Anton M. Leiter. Friends, have you actually tried them, those dandies, those dillies down the dales and up the hillies? Wide Gap Auto Light resistor spark plugs? Well, by Cornelius, do prove to yourself that Wide Gap Auto Light resistor spark plugs actually make your car idle smoother, give you better performance with leaner gas mixtures, save you gas dollars, and cut down interference with radio and television reception. My, oh, my. If you want to see a satisfied, smiling guy, switch to Auto light resistor spark plugs only. The Auto light company offers car and truck owners everywhere their sensational advantages. So head for your nearest auto light dealer and replace old Narrow Gap spark plugs with Wide gap Autolite resistor spark plugs. Remember, be right with Autolight.

[Howard Da Silva]

And now, Autolyte presents Jane Wyman in a tale well calculated.

[Narrator/Host]

To keep you in suspense,

[Jane Wyman]

let me tell you. Let me talk as long as I can. It's my last chance to explain about Phil and all the trouble I had afterwards. Phil got me into this mess. The night he died, I sat near his bed, waiting for him to fall asleep.

[Narrator/Host]

And he said, margo, was there anything in that milk you gave me tonight?

[Jane Wyman]

Well, of course, darling. Dr. Landers prescribed it a sedative.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, you're a beautiful woman, Margot. Very beautiful, yes.

[Jane Wyman]

He was taking so long to fall asleep. It was already after three in the morning. I listened to the wind. Phil and I were all alone, stuck in that godforsaken mountain inn ever since he fell ill just before Labor Day. There we were, 10,000ft above sea level, not a soul for miles. The fall season was over, and all the other guests were gone. And even Joe, who owns the inn, had gone down to Leadfield to get his winter supplies. I shivered, thinking of the dark, ragged, lonesome mountains outside, and found Phil opened his eyes again.

[Narrator/Host]

You're a good actress, Margot. Better off the stage than you were on, I expect. But I know you're fed up with our marriage. Have been ever since I became ill.

[Jane Wyman]

I haven't complained, Phil.

[Narrator/Host]

No, it Wouldn't fit the part. But you feel trapped out here in Colorado, don't you? You'd rather be in New York. I wonder. Margot, those pills you put on my lunch tray last week. They weren't my regular vitamin pills. Maybe you want your freedom and my money. Enough to poison me?

[Jane Wyman]

Don't be ridiculous, Phil.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, anyway, I didn't take them. I hid them with a note saying that you tried to give them to me. Then I called a friend of mine long distance. An old friend.

[Jane Wyman]

Who?

[Narrator/Host]

A detective named Rocky Rhodes. Rocky and I both stayed at this inn one summer.

[Jane Wyman]

And what did you tell this Rocky?

[Narrator/Host]

Never mind what I told him. Just remember he's due here tonight or in the morning.

[Jane Wyman]

A detective? Phil, you're a fool.

[Narrator/Host]

I want a divorce, Margot.

[Jane Wyman]

You do?

[Narrator/Host]

Yes. Without any strings. Those pills are exhibit A. If they're poison, blackmail.

[Jane Wyman]

Phil, darling, if you want a divorce, you can have it without threatening me.

[Narrator/Host]

You'll sign the papers tomorrow?

[Jane Wyman]

Of course, darling. I only want to make you happy. But now go to sleep, Phil. You need a good rest. Go to sleep. I stroked his forehead and the sedatives finally took effect. His breathing became very heavy and even. I looked at him and thought he was smart not to take those pills. But not smart enough. He shouldn't have told me about that detective. He thought he was protecting himself and that I wouldn't dare do anything now. But he was wrong, because I had to now. I couldn't afford to wait and lose everything when he divorced me. And besides, I'd find those pills in the letter before the detective got here. There was practically no the way I'd planned it this time. Outside, it had started to rain, a heavy downpour, and the only other sound in the world was Phil's breathing. I picked up the extra pillow and put it down carefully, carefully over his face. He didn't move. I pressed the pillow down on the side so that no air could get in. No air at all, and had held it there a long time. Once the pillow shook a little when Phil's head moved. Once there was a gurgling sound. And that was all when I lifted the pillow and took it back in its place. The job was done. Everything I ever wanted, money and freedom was right in my hands. Phil was dead. Dead of a heart attack. Dr. Landers would say. Oh, but wait a minute. Unless someone found those pills with a note from Phil. Phil hadn't died of poison, so I was safe. But there would be questions, questions I didn't want to have asked. I had to Find those pills myself. I started to search. First the pillow under Phil's head.

[Narrator/Host]

No.

[Jane Wyman]

Then the nightstand beside his bed. And the desk under the window. No. Where could he have hidden it after all? The bell. Could it be filled, Detective? Already? Rocky. Rocky Rhodes. I'll have to be very careful. Just a minute. I'm coming. Just a minute. Yes? Well, don't stand there. It's raining in.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm sorry. I think I'm lost. I'm looking for Pine View Lodge.

[Jane Wyman]

But you are lost. This is Fisherman's Net.

[Narrator/Host]

I know. I saw the sign.

[Jane Wyman]

It's. It's closed for the winter.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, could you put me up?

[Jane Wyman]

The manager's away. There's only me and my husband.

[Narrator/Host]

The luck of the Irish. I meet a beautiful blonde and she's married. Every time. You wouldn't turn me out in this storm. I'm soaking wet, I'm afraid. Please, just tonight. In the morning. I'll get my bearings.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, if it. If it's only for one night.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes, that's all. Thank you. Oh, what a vacation.

[Jane Wyman]

Where are you from?

[Narrator/Host]

Chicago newspaper man. My name is Mike Sheldon.

[Jane Wyman]

How do you do, Mr. Sheldon? I'm Mrs. Weatherby.

[Narrator/Host]

How do you do? Where do I bunk? Upstairs?

[Jane Wyman]

Yes, you can take the Trout Room. Every room is named for a different kind of fish. It's the second room on the right from the top of the stairs.

[Narrator/Host]

Thank you. It's great of you to let me stay.

[Jane Wyman]

Would you like some hot coffee?

[Narrator/Host]

Fine. It's no trouble.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, not at all. I was going to make some for myself.

[Narrator/Host]

I can use some. All right.

[Jane Wyman]

No, no. Wait. No, not that room. No.

[Narrator/Host]

What's wrong, Mrs. Weatherby?

[Jane Wyman]

Well, I said. I said the second door on the right, the Salmon Room, not the Trout Room. I made a mistake. Forgive me, but this is my husband's room and he's not well. I was afraid you'd wake him up. Oh, that was bad, very bad. Making a slip like that in front of Phil's detective Rocky Rhodes. Because, of course, Mike Sheldon was Rocky Rhodes. Who else could he be? And I had to find those pills before he did and started making trouble. Before I could get back to the search, two more unexpected guests popped in at Fisherman's Net. A small, dapper man with a black mustache and slick black hair.

[Narrator/Host]

But I'm Charlie Miller. I got a reservation here and I'm staying, sister.

[Jane Wyman]

But the manager is away. He didn't mention any reservations.

[Narrator/Host]

He must have forgot. Then I made it by telephone from KC that is. I mean, I asked a friend of Mine to make it

[Jane Wyman]

a friend of his. Was it Phil? Was Charlie Miller Rocky Rhodes. Oh, he couldn't be a detective. He was too stupid. No, no. Mike Sheldon was Rocky Rhodes. There was a girl with Charlie Miller. I thought she was Mrs. Miller. No, I'm Susan Quinn. Mr. Miller and I met on the bus.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, and we were great pals right off. I. I call her Susie Q. You get it?

[Jane Wyman]

Yes, but the initials on your suitcase are Sr. Ms. Quinn. Oh, well, I borrowed my sister Sheila's suitcase. Sheila Riley. She's married. Sheila and I always borrow each other things. Was it true, or was her name Susan Rhodes, nicknamed Rocky Rhodes? Things are getting more complicated every minute. Two men had arrived, and Sheldon seemed the most like a detective. It was too late for me then to go on hunting for the pills. It was morning. In case questions were asked later, I had to be able to say I had done what a wife with a sick husband ought to do. I had to take Phil his breakfast on a tray.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, Mrs. W. Hey, you're an early bird. Here, let me help you.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, thank you, Mr. Miller. This is my husband's breakfast. If you'll open the door.

[Howard Da Silva]

Sure thing.

[Narrator/Host]

There you are.

[Jane Wyman]

Thank you. Phil. Phil, dear, I brought you.

[Narrator/Host]

Something wrong, Mrs. W?

[Jane Wyman]

My husband, he looks. He looks.

[Narrator/Host]

Anything I can do? Say, he does look pretty green at that. Mr. Weatherby. Hey, Mr. We. You better sit down, Mrs. Wetherby. It looks to me like your husband has passed away. Oh, no, no, no, no.

[Jane Wyman]

Here, now, just sit down.

[Narrator/Host]

All right. Now, you just cry on Uncle Charlie's shoulder. It'll do you good.

[Jane Wyman]

You're very kind.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, good morning. Oh, say, Sheldon. Got a little trouble here. Trouble, Mrs. Wetherby? Well, her husband's passed away in his sleep, looks like.

[Jane Wyman]

I brought his breakfast. I thought he was asleep. Will you. Will somebody phone Phil's doctor, Dr. Landers and Salisbury Gap?

[Narrator/Host]

Well, of course, but.

[Jane Wyman]

Excuse me. I'm afraid I better go to my room. Misses Wetherby. Mrs. Wetherby. Oh, Ms. Quinn. What happened? Have I been asleep? When you got to your room, you fainted. I still feel rather faint. I brought you some brandy. Could you drink a little? Not now, I couldn't. Where's Mr. Miller and Mr. Sheldon? They're moving your husband's body. No, they mustn't. Dr. Landers told Mike to on the phone. The rain turned to snow during the night and he won't be able to get here because of the storm. Not until the snowplow gets through. So he thought it best we put Mr. Weatherby, not outdoors. No. There's a hillside cellar out back. Oh, yes. What else did Dr. Landis say about Phil? He said it must have been a heart attack and that you have nothing in the world with which to reproach yourself. He's sure you did everything you.

[Howard Da Silva]

For suspense, Autolite is bringing you Ms. Jane Wyman in radio's outstanding theater of thrills, Suspense.

[Narrator/Host]

Say, Hap. Look at that stack of valentines. Quite a pile, child. In fact, flocks. Oh, they're not for me. They're Valentine's to Auto light resistor spark plugs. Listen to this one. You've won my heart with your kisses and your hugs's and a set of Auto light resistor spark plugs. How's that happen? Ah, the spark gloves. Why, sure. Everybody loves Auto Light wide gap resistor spark plugs. Replace your narrow gap plugs with these beauties to make your car idle smoother, give better performance with leaner gas mixtures. Actually save gas dollars. Now, here's a valentine that's right in line. Oh, Valentine, will you be mine and will you make me happy? Put auto light resistor spark plugs in my car. Help make it smooth and snappy. Boy, that's hitting on all safe. Well, naturally. Here's another valentine that touches this old heart of mine. Oh, Auto light resistor spark plugs. With me you are a fixture. You help my car run smoother far and go on lean gas mixture. Say, Arlo, that's the best yet. But right now, here's suspense.

[Howard Da Silva]

And now, Autolight brings back to a Hollywood soundstage.

[Narrator/Host]

Ms. Jane Wyman as Margot in Catch me if you can, a tale well

[Howard Da Silva]

calculated to keep you in suspense.

[Jane Wyman]

I kept up my act all that day, and I didn't overplay it. I'm not the type for floods of tears. So I adopted a warm, gentle sadness which made the others think me very brave. But all the time there were two things on my mind driving me crazy. Who was Rocky Rhodes? And where had Phil hidden the pills? And I couldn't hunt for them. Somebody was always in my room, fussing over me. Finally, in the late afternoon, I managed to get away. I just started to look through Phil's clothes when.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, here you are. I was looking for you. No snowplow will get through here today. I'll just have to put up with Charlie Miller's jokes another evening.

[Jane Wyman]

Are his jokes that bad?

[Narrator/Host]

Well, you heard him ragging Susan, calling her Susie Q. Oh, nicknames.

[Jane Wyman]

Lots of people have the nickname habit. My husband had a friend named Rhodes. He Nicknamed Rocky Roads.

[Narrator/Host]

It's a change from Dusty Rhodes, at any rate. By the way, where are you from?

[Jane Wyman]

Boston. Why do you ask?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, just idle curiosity.

[Jane Wyman]

You know what they say about curiosity. Would you excuse me, please? I was going over my husband's things.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, go right ahead. I'll just keep you company. Looking for something?

[Jane Wyman]

No, I want a pack so I can leave as soon as possible. I want to get back to New York.

[Narrator/Host]

I don't blame you. Need any help?

[Jane Wyman]

No, thank you. As a matter of fact, I. Would you mind? I'd rather be alone.

[Narrator/Host]

No, I know it's not good for you to be alone. I'll just stay here and keep you company.

[Jane Wyman]

Nosy.

[Narrator/Host]

Did you say something?

[Jane Wyman]

No, I.

[Narrator/Host]

Here's a book of Oscar Wilde's. Why don't I read to you while you work? Let me see. Did your husband own all these shoes?

[Jane Wyman]

He did.

[Narrator/Host]

Wealthy man, apparently. How nice for you. Now, how about some poetry? Let's. Let's try this one. The Poor Dead Woman whom He loved and Murdered in her bed. Shall I Go on, Mrs. Wetherby?

[Jane Wyman]

But I couldn't let Sheldon unnerve me. I had to keep cool. I went on packing and he went on reading on and on, endlessly about blood and prisons and hangings while I tried not to miss anything of Phil's. I had to have those pills. An hour later in my room. I knew I didn't have them, but Rocky Rhodes didn't have them yet either. Otherwise he would have said something. But the pills didn't have to be in Phil's room. Which one was Rhodes, Miller or Sheldon? I would have to find out by elimination. After dinner that night, I went into the main parlor and Charlie Miller grabbed me and danced me over to the fire.

[Narrator/Host]

Ah, here you are, Mrs. Ms. W. Now, you just sit right here and have a highball, see, and we'll have a nice little cozy chat with little old Charlie.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, you're so formal, Charlie. Call me Margo.

[Narrator/Host]

Margo? I'll bet your mother called you Maggie. You thought up Margo to use on the stage.

[Jane Wyman]

On the stage? How did you know I was an actress? This was the clue I'd been looking for.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, a guy with my experience can always tell.

[Jane Wyman]

You can?

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. And I know how you actresses operate. You all take different monikers. I'll bet you were great, baby.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, I wasn't very good. There was only one way that Miller could have known about my being on the stage. From Phil.

[Narrator/Host]

You weren't very good. I know different, baby. So what if you only played tank towns. I sure wish I'd seen you.

[Jane Wyman]

You didn't miss much. Really? Tank towns? That was Phil's story, all right. Miller was rocky road, and he was just drunk enough to handle.

[Narrator/Host]

Hey, look, how about you and me going up to my room where we can be alone?

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, that wouldn't look right, Charlie. We could go out and sit in my car. It's in the garage. Got a heater and radio. The hotel radio is broken. We can say that's why we're going to listen to the music.

[Narrator/Host]

Wonderful. You're a wonderful little woman, Maggie. Full of ideas. Ah, not a bad little wagon, baby. But this front seat is so full of steering wheel. Let's get in the back.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, it doesn't heat as well in the back.

[Narrator/Host]

How about a drink?

[Jane Wyman]

You first.

[Narrator/Host]

Okay. Right out of the bottom. Oh, boy. This is what I call living music. Plenty of bourbon and a beautiful blonde. Never saw such a beautiful blonde. Gonna give Charlie a kiss? Oh, wow. Sweeter than molasses. It's getting warm enough now, baby. Plenty warm. Could turn off that heater.

[Jane Wyman]

I'm still a little cold, Charlie. Just stay close to me. In a minute, we'll turn it off. Then slowly he sagged against me and his head fell on my shoulder. And when I pushed him away, he fell forward against the steering wheel. I hope nobody heard that. Oh, I gotta get out of here before it gets me too. I kept on my feet going around the car. I was dizzy, getting numb. Then a few feet from the garage door, I keeled over for. For a minute or more, I could move. Then I crawled toward the door. It took forever to get there. I opened the door, somehow pushed it shut and half fell out and lay in the snow, breathing that clean air. Thanking my lucky stars I've been smart enough not to drink. That's why it got Charlie sooner, because he was drunk. I looked at my watch and decided to wait 15 minutes. What a wonderful thing that carbon monoxide is. No smell, no nothing. It just creeps up on you. In 15 minutes, Charlie Miller, alias Rocky Rhodes. What, being good and dead. He was dead, all right. When they found us, they carried me into the house and gave me a drink and put me to bed. I went right to sleep knowing Rocky Rhodes was dead. When I woke up, I remembered the car key. I had said Charlie started the car, but somebody might think to check the the key for fingerprints and find mine. I put on a fur coat over my nightgown and ran all the way to the garage. I got in the car Reached for the keys and they weren't there. Why? Why would anybody take my keys? And who would take them? Rocky Rhodes? No. He was dead. But was he? Had I killed the wrong man? I don't know how I ever got through breakfast.

[Narrator/Host]

That's too bad about Charlie. Margot, stop worrying about. It wasn't your fault. Look tired. You want to take a walk? Get some fresh air?

[Jane Wyman]

I. I don't feel up to it. I was planning to go up to that lookout cabin on the peak.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, no, no, I'm too lazy for that. I mean a short walk.

[Jane Wyman]

Is it a long climb, Mrs. Wetherby? Long and steep? Believe me, I only made it up there once. But my husband used to go there often. I guess a good climb will do me good. Think I'll try it alone. Bye. I'll be back before dark.

[Narrator/Host]

Bye. Be careful, Susan.

[Jane Wyman]

I didn't even hear her leave. I was thinking about Phil's walk to the lookout cabin. There was where he'd hidden the pills. I knew it. I knew it in my bones. Why hadn't I thought of it before? Oh, I'd have to hurry. I couldn't let anyone find those pills except me. I managed to get away from the men and slipped out by the back door without being seen. A ladder goes up from the trail to the lookout door. The door of the cabin stood open. I climbed the ladder quietly and stepped in and saw Susan on the other side of the room near the door to the balcony. She was holding an envelope attached to a card. And she was reading the card. And suddenly, definitely I knew. Miss Rocky Rhodes, I presume. Oh. Oh, you scared me. Mrs. Weatherby. I see you found what you're looking for. The pills my husband hid. You want to know if they're really poisonous. I read this card. Is it some kind of a joke? Oh, no, it's no joke. One of them would kill a man. But that's not what killed Phil. I smothered him with a pillow. You didn't know that, did you? Oh, you shouldn't be telling me this. Phil told me you were coming, but I was expecting a man. I never dreamed Rocky Rhodes was a woman. You've mistaken me for someone else. Really? Oh, come off it. You're already responsible for Charlie Miller's death, coming here under an assumed name. I killed him because I thought he was Rocky Rhodes.

[Narrator/Host]

You killed him.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, no, you didn't. Oh, you're ill. Missing Mrs. Weatherby. You're imagining. Stay where you are. You think you'll get out of here alive? I Wouldn't go out that door if I were you. You'd step right off into blank space. But you can't do these things. They'll catch you. Who? How? Those pills are the only evidence against me. And I'll destroy them as soon as you're gone. Will you stop? Stay where you are, you fool. What good does that do you, throwing them out? Watch where they fall. There. Right on the path. They'll stay there until I go down. But you've played your last card. I'm not going to waste any more time. Let go, Mrs. Weatherby. Let go. You're going over the edge, Susie. You're going to be another tragic accident. Let go of that table. You fold inch by inch. We're getting there. Now, out on the porch, I'll pull you over with me. Will you? Will you really? Someone's coming. Someone's climbing the trail. It's Mike. You're crazy. Mike. Let's stop railing.

[Narrator/Host]

Let's stop it. Stop.

[Jane Wyman]

I remember falling. Falling. Then. Then a sharp pain. Then I don't remember anymore. Until I woke up here in the snow and found you bending over me. Who are you? Where did you come from?

[Narrator/Host]

I just came up from the village. Mrs. Mrs. Weatherby, we know the whole story.

[Jane Wyman]

The whole story.

[Narrator/Host]

Now, just take it easy, Mrs. Weatherby.

[Jane Wyman]

I know you must be a doctor. But, doctor, they'll never hang me.

[Narrator/Host]

No, Mrs. Wetherby, they'll never hang you. You're dying now.

[Jane Wyman]

No. No, I can't die. After all I've had to do to. To live. Where did Mike go?

[Narrator/Host]

I'm right here, Mrs. Wetherby.

[Jane Wyman]

Like a vulture waiting for me to die. You're Rocky Rhodes, aren't you? Mike?

[Narrator/Host]

No, Mrs. Wetherby.

[Jane Wyman]

You're lying. It has to be you. I killed Charlie. And he wasn't Rocky Rhodes. And Susan wasn't. You have to be. I. I have to know. I have to kill Rocky or I've done it all for nothing. Rocky Roads. Mustn't find those poison pills.

[Narrator/Host]

Your husband didn't die from poison, Mrs. Wetherby. So you would have been safe even if the pills were found.

[Jane Wyman]

But. But Rocky Rhodes.

[Narrator/Host]

None of those people was Rocky Rhodes. Your own guilt made you suspicious of everything they did.

[Jane Wyman]

But there must be a Rocky Roads. Phil said there was. There has to be to be a Rocky ro.

[Narrator/Host]

Is she dead, Doctor? I'm afraid she is. There I was being sorry for her, her husband being dead. Just think, she killed her husband and one of us. And none of us would ever have known it if she hadn't told Susan all about it in the cabin. It was good of you to get here so fast, Doctor. I'd have gotten here sooner if it hadn't been for the blizzard. Maybe none of this would have happened. By the way, I'm not a doctor, Mr. Sheldon. My name is Rhodes. Rocky Roads.

[Howard Da Silva]

Thank you, Jane Wyman, for a Special Splendid performance.

[Narrator/Host]

Ms. Wyman, would you do me a favor?

[Jane Wyman]

I'd be glad to, Mr. Wilcox.

[Narrator/Host]

Would you autograph my script?

[Jane Wyman]

Why, certainly. What shall I write?

[Narrator/Host]

Well, why not just write to ALRSP Wilcox from Jane Wyman, A L RSP

[Jane Wyman]

what does that stand for?

[Narrator/Host]

Auto Light Resistor Spark Plugs.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, of course. I should have known. A plug for plugs.

[Narrator/Host]

Why, sure.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, A L, R, S P it is. There. How's that?

[Narrator/Host]

Thank you. And did you know, Ms. Wyman, that besides Auto light resistor spark plugs, Autolite makes over 400 other products for cars, trucks, airplanes and boats. In 28 auto light plants from coast to coast, Autolite makes complete electrical systems for many makes of America's finest cars. Batteries, generators, starting motors, coils, distributors, all ignition engineered to meet the highest standards of leading automotive engineers. So, folks, tomorrow treat your car to an expert motor tune up. Visit your local Autolite service station listed in your classified telephone directory or the dealer who sells your make of car. And be sure to specify original factory parts. You're right with Autolight.

[Howard Da Silva]

And now, in introducing again our star, Ms. Jane Wyman, I wish also to extend to her, on behalf of our sponsor and all of us here on suspense, our sincere congratulations on her nomination

[Narrator/Host]

for the Academy Award for her splendid

[Howard Da Silva]

performance in the current Warner Brothers picture Johnny Belinda.

[Narrator/Host]

And to wish her the best of luck in ballading.

[Jane Wyman]

Thank you very much. And may I congratulate suspense for being one of the top radio programs on the air. Truly radio's outstanding theater of thrills.

[Howard Da Silva]

Thank you, miss1.

[Jane Wyman]

And I'll be listening next week when James Mason and his lovely wife Pamela Calino appear in the Agatha Christie story Where There's a Will. Another gripping study in suspense.

[Narrator/Host]

Tonight's suspense play was adapted by Sylvia Richards from the current best selling mystery by Pat McGear. Music was composed by Lucian Morowek and conducted by Lud Bluskin. The entire production was under the direction of Anton M. Leeder.

[Jane Wyman]

Auto Light Resistor sp Spark plugs have been adopted as original factory equipment by six leading makes of cars and trucks. So switch to auto light. Good night.

[Narrator/Host]

This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System.

[Howard Da Silva]

Sa.

[Narrator/Host]

Suspense.

[Howard Da Silva]

Tonight, AutoLight and its 96,000 dealers present Mr. Raymond in Chicken Feed, a suspense

[Narrator/Host]

play produced and edited by William Spears. Hey, Hap, what happened? Get me a doctor. Rush the fast getting here. Run my battery dry. Why, you don't need a doctor. You need an auto Light stay full battery. Why, these brilliant, beautiful, bouncy babies want water only three times a year. Yes, only three times a year. In normal car use, their larger liquid load is like a lake compared to ordinary batteries. And Autolite stay full batteries have extra protection with fiberglass retaining mats for longer life. Why, in tests conducted according to life cycle standards of the society of automotive Engineers, Autolite stay full batteries gave 70% longer average life than batteries without the stay full features. So, folks, get an Autolite stay full battery. Remember, you're always right with Autolite. Oh, and friends, a reminder. Suspense may be seen on television in many parts of the country every Tuesday night.

[Howard Da Silva]

And now with Chicken Feed and with the performance of Ray Milan, Auto light

[Narrator/Host]

hopes once again to keep you in suspend. All right, it was a silly thing to fight over, I admit it. But there it was. A nickel. A measly, worthless nickel. Chicken feed. But of course, that was only the beginning. Junior had asked for a nickel, and I flipped it over to him after he left the room. Mary said I shouldn't spoil the kid. It was time he learned the value of money. And I said, great Scott, if I couldn't give my own child a nickel without her jumping down my throat. I said, after all, what's a nickel good for? Cup of coffee? Oh, you know. You know how these things get going. You keep saying things you shouldn't, and she lashes out with an answer, and before you know it, you've stormed out of the house and you're taking it out on the cock. 50 miles cooled me down a little, but not much. I automatically slowed up when I came to the sign. You are now entering Lansing, California. Go slow and see our town. Go fast and see our jail. Everybody knew Lansing. Speed trap. Tough town. Driving at a normal speed through the quiet Sunday street gave me time to think of something besides the biting words Mary and I had slugged at each other. I pulled up at a little cafe next to the police station. Had a whitewash sign in the window. Best cup of coffee in town for 5 cents.

[Jane Wyman]

And I resent that. Officer Brady, too.

[Narrator/Host]

Over easy, Sam, and heavy on the fried.

[Jane Wyman]

What's yours, mister?

[Narrator/Host]

Coffee, please.

[Jane Wyman]

Coming up. Here you are. Hey, Officer Brady. How's your starboarder Phillips?

[Narrator/Host]

Ah, they're coming for him in the morning.

[Jane Wyman]

They could be able to hold him until then. He got out of that Bennington jail like a paper bag.

[Narrator/Host]

But don't worry, sister. Mr. Phillips won't get out of this room. Well, I listened to him for half an ear while I sipped my coffee. Best cup in town for 5 cents. That reminded me of our argument over a nickel. That's about all a nickel's good for a cup of coffee. Some places, a newspaper, phone call. There was a stack of the local papers nearby, and I poke one over to this. Phillips is on the front page. Bank robber killed a teller. He had a face I wouldn't want to run into. Close. After a while, the hot coffee made me feel a little better. And maybe. Well, maybe I'd been at fault as much as Mary. She wasn't the only one who had a bad temper. On a sudden impulse, I left my coffee, went over to the phone in the far wall. I heard the dial tone, and then I fished in my. Thought it would change. It was empty. Say, miss, could you change a dollar for me? I want to use the phone.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, yes, sir.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, I'm.

[Jane Wyman]

What's the matter, mister?

[Narrator/Host]

My. My wallet, I seem to have. Look, I'll be back in a minute. No, Mary wasn't the only one with a temper. I'd stormed out of the house without you changing the contents of my pockets to clean my suit. Didn't have a dime on me, not a nickel. I rummaged in the glove compartment. Mary sometimes left the coin first, but this time, naturally, it wasn't there. I felt like a fool. What seems to be the trouble, mister? Oh, hello, officer. I seem to have come out without any money. It's embarrassing. Yeah. Yeah, embarrassing. I didn't realize it. I tried to phone, but I. Wait a minute. Just a minute, huh? Where's your driver's license? Oh, it's in my wallet. San Francisco. Got any other identification? Well, the registration slip on the car. Oh, yeah, that's the car. What about you? Look, officer, I'm Ralph Clark. Clark and Jacobs in the Hatfield building. They're attorneys. Attorneys. I should have a card somewhere. Kind of far from home to be without any dough, ain't you? Well, I came out of the house without changing the stuff into this suit. You know how it is. Yeah. How do you happen to have the keys to the car? Well, I don't take them out, and it's in the garage. Yeah. Say, you don't think. Where you headed for? Well, I know it sounds funny, but nowhere, really. You see, you had a fight with my wife, and I Just batted out of the house to cool off. I tell you what, Mr. Clark, suppose we just mosey over to the station house? The station house? Say, what is that? Oh, nothing, nothing at all. It's right next door and you can call your wife from there. But I don't see why that's necessary. If you'd just lend me a nickel, I could call here and reverse the charges. Well, we'll go. You can leave the car here. I'll take that key. Look here. Obvious I don't. Come on, move on, move on. All the stupid situations today. What you got this time? It's hurry. Better after he makes his call. Give me the phone, will you, Ross? That's out of order. Went dead half hour ago. Yeah, I reported it. They said they can't have a man here before tomorrow. Well, did you tell him this is a police station, for Pete's sakes? Sure, I told him. It ain't bad, though. We get incoming calls and we still got the nickel snatcher over there. Oh, yeah? Well, there's a pay phone, Mr. Clark. You can make your call from there. I don't have any money, remember? Oh, yeah, okay. Here's a nickel. Gee, thanks. Let me speak to your wife with you. Get her. This is going to sound fine, just fine. She'll think I really tied one on. Operator, I want to call San Francisco Filmo 6098 and reverse the charges, please.

[Jane Wyman]

Thank you. Your number, please.

[Narrator/Host]

This is four six zero. Hello.

[Jane Wyman]

I have a collect call from Lansing, California for Fillmore 60098. Will you accept it? Lansing? Well, I don't know anyone.

[Narrator/Host]

It's me, Mary. Take the call.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, it's you, is it? What do you think you're doing? 50. Will you accept the call, madam? I should say not. The very idea.

[Narrator/Host]

Hey, Mary, wait. I'm sorry, the party will not accept the call. Look, Aubrey, get her back, will you? This is important. I will ring them again. Swell. That's a sweetheart. She's there, the little. Why doesn't she pick up that phone?

[Jane Wyman]

Your party does not answer?

[Narrator/Host]

No. So? Well, that's your nickel. Let me have another one, will you? I'll get hold of my partner. He'll identify me. Look, we've wasted enough time. Come on in here. But those are the cells, right? You're locking me up? Right again. But what's the big idea? I didn't do anything. What are you charging me with? You don't have to charge you with anything. I'm holding you on suspicion. Suspicion? Suspicion of what? Defrauding the cafe, for one thing. And I want to check that car. You think I stole it? Well, it's been done. Now, wait a minute. If you'll just let me fall, you're entitled to one call. You've had it. But look here, officer. Come on inside. Jail in jail. All on account of a measly nettle. A lousy, stinking nickel. Hey, welcome to our jail, Stink Potted

[Jane Wyman]

a Santa Nueva Valley, huh, Slim?

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah, you said it. What's your beef, chum? Suspicion. Can you feature that suspicion? They won't even give me a nickel to phone. You mean you ain't even got a nickel? No, you see, I, I that's too bad, ain't it, Pete? Oh, yeah, sure is. I wish we could help you out. Yeah, maybe we can at that. You got a nickel? Sure, I got three of them. Well, let me one, will you? Just one. I'll pay you back. I'll. I'll send you $10 soon as I get out of here. What's it worth to you, chump? What I just told you. $10. Yeah, yeah, I know. Pie in the sky. Hey, my wristwatch. Why didn't I think of that before? What's the matter with it? Oh, nothing. Nothing's the matter with it. It's worth $50. Yeah, you fool. Look at it. It's yours for 5 cents. For one measly nickel. What can you lose? Must be something wrong with it. Is it hot? Hot? You mean stolen? Of course not. What are you offering it for nickel for? Because I want to get out of this filthy place. Oh, so you don't like our company, is that it? Well, if you want to put it that way. No, I don't. The man don't like our company. Now, ain't that just too bad? Hey, what do you think of that, Mr. Phillips? He don't like us. You got any nickels, Mr. Phillips? I followed his glance. For the first time. I saw, deep in the gloom of the locked cubicle, the face I'd seen on the front page of the newspaper. The face I'd said I wouldn't want to run into. Close. Well, it was close, and I was glad there were bars between us. Course, us guys ain't much, but Mr. Phillips here, he's a big shot. Robbed four banks and broke into two jails. Killed a man, too. Yeah, sure, we're just vags. But Mr. Phillips, he's going to the hot seat. Yeah, they're coming to get him. Take him back to Utah and find him. They don't burn him In Utah, they shoot him. Ain't that right, Mr. Phillips? Mr. Phillips don't want to talk about it. Yeah, Mr. Phillips, he don't want to talk about nothing.

[Jane Wyman]

Mr. Phillips seemed very sociable, just like this.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, now, look, fellas, I didn't mean. I just meant I want to get out of this jail. Here, take the watch and give me the nickel, huh? Tell you what I'll do. I'll match you for it. Match me? Yeah. Nickel against the watch. Well, take it or leave it. Well, all right. Leave Pete Hall a watch here, huh? I'll flip a nickel on the floor and you call, huh? Heads. Tails.

[Howard Da Silva]

I win.

[Narrator/Host]

Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Get your foot over it. How do you know it's tails? It's tails, ain't it? Sure, it's tails, all right. Here's the watch, Slim. Say, what is this? Watch it, brother. You're not gonna get away with this. Get him, Pete. Yeah, This is for me.

[Jane Wyman]

And me.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, don't kick me. Hey, what's going on in there? Officer, these men.

[Jane Wyman]

There ain't nothing.

[Narrator/Host]

Officer, this new guy is acting up, that's all. Quiet down in there. Now.

[Jane Wyman]

Get up.

[Narrator/Host]

I can't. He kicked me. Trying to get us in trouble, huh? No, no, I. Look, fella, for heaven's sake, shut up. Okay, Kangaroo. I'll be the judge, and you'll be the prosecutor, huh? Right. Maybe Mr. Phillips will be defense attorney. You want to Mr. Phillips, he don't wanna. Prisoner at the bar. Stand up. I said stand up. Cut it out, will ya?

[Jane Wyman]

Shut up. All right, counselor, what is the prisoner charged with?

[Narrator/Host]

Your Honor, this man's a desperate criminal. He's charged with breaking into jail, insulting his fellow boarders, poor sportsmanship and a very dangerous character. Your Honor. Oh, yeah, yeah. Guilty on all counts. Prisoner, have you anything to say before I pronounce sentence? No.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, I fine you 5 cents. Hand it over.

[Narrator/Host]

You know I haven't got it.

[Jane Wyman]

Can't pay her. Well, then you can work it out a rate of $0.01 a day. Your first job will be to shine the court's shoes.

[Narrator/Host]

Shine your own shoes. Oh, he's gonna be like that. Hold him, Slim.

[Jane Wyman]

Yeah.

[Narrator/Host]

Officer. Officer, fight them in there.

[Jane Wyman]

Yes, sir.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, now get on them shoes. I don't have anything to shine them with. You got a coat, ain't you? Now get going. The next hours were unadulterated agony. It was unbelievable. The filthy, inhuman things they could think up for me to do. It was. It was just frightful. With every move I made, I could feel the glittering steely eyes of the silent man in the locked cage on me, following me, weighing me. And finally, when they couldn't think of anything more, they forced me to stand, looking right into Phillips's cage. They couldn't see his face, it was too close to mine. But he. He winked at me and he nodded his head as though it were a signal. And then his two huge arms came through the bars and thrust me reading across the cell and I fell and hit my head. And that's all. Autolite is bringing you Mr. Ray Milan in Chicken Feet. Tonight's production in radio's outstanding theater of thrills Suspend. Hey Hap, get a load of this picture. What the. A herd of camels picketing the Autolite battery plane. Yeah, look at the signs. Autolite Stay Full batteries unfair to Camels. Now how do you figure that? It's easy. Those thirstless Auto Light Stay Full batteries have kicked Camels water reserve reputation into a cocked hat. You mean because an Autolite Stay Full needs water only three times a year? Yay. And verily and also correct. Auto Light Stay Full batteries need water only three times a year in normal car use, this extra liquid reserve expels one of the major causes of battery failure means exceedingly excellent performance and extremely long life. You'd say it's expedient to own an Autolite Stay Full battery? Exactly. And for a few more Autolite Stay Full extras, get this extra protection with fiberglass retaining mats. Extra long life as compared to batteries without Stay Full features. In fact 70% longer average life as established by tests conducted according to life cycle standards of the Society of Automotive Engineers. Why would an Autolite stay Full battery? You can tell the difference in your car. You're right with Autolight. And now Autolite brings back to our

[Howard Da Silva]

Hollywood soundstage, Ray Milland in Chicken Feet

[Narrator/Host]

a tale well calculated to keep you in suspend. I don't know what time it was. Two or three in the morning, I guess. When I I felt a stealthy touch on my shoulder. I opened my eyes. I was still on the stone floor and Phillips was bending over me holding a revolver. My mouth opened for an involuntary cry and he clapped a hand over Shut up you fool. You want to wake them punks? Get up quick and be quiet about it. I glanced quickly at Phillips cell. It was open. So was the door to the corridor. He pushed me on and locked the door behind us. In his office, bound and gagged securely to his desk chair, Sergeant Ross glared at us. The empty holster at his side told where Phillips had got his gun here. Which is the key to your car? This one. Okay, take it and let's move. Where's the car? Over there. You drive. Yeah. Well, we made it. Them hick bulls, they panicked me. Guy could spring that croc with a hairpin. But you, you nearly done a fine job of lousing. What happened to you? Getting thrown in the can in the middle of the day, huh? Well, they. They picked me up on suspicion. Well, it wasn't supposed to be till midnight tonight. And all that phony kid stuff about the nickel. The nickel? Yeah. All that double talk when all you had to do was slip me the word that Jerry Nichols sent you. Served you right, the way them lushes treated you. Acting like a diet in the World Square. Jerry Nichols. Nichols. My numbed brain slowly put the meaning of his words into shape. He thought. He thought I was an accomplice sent by a partner to help him break jail. Then all my screams about a nickel had been nothing but a signal to him. A signal that I came from Jerry Nichols. Jerry got the hideout set up? Yes. Well, where is it? The hideout? The hideout. We're going to Jerry's place first, ain't we? Then what? Well, I. I'll take you to Jerry's. Then I guess he'll take you. Take over from there. How far is it to Jerry's? Can't be any more than about five miles. Is it? Well, it's. Look behind you. What's the matter? There's a car following us. Loud lights. Well, I don't see. Hey, what's a big idea? You trying to cross me? I couldn't help it. My foot slammed on the brake. That car. We. We've got to get out of here. Go ahead. Get it started. Come on, come on. It's flooded. I'm getting out. Till that car passes, you make for the other side. No tricks. Just to make sure, I'll take this key. I'd made myself a chance, and I took it. I slipped out of the car on the other side and ran. Ran across the fields until I could run no more. After an interminable two miles, I found a road. And after a while of tramping along the road, a dark shape loomed up up before me. A gas station. And through the glass I could make out the outline of a telephone. I tried the door. It was locked, of course. But I found a tire iron and sprang the latch. I'd run to the phone, almost thrown myself on it before I saw it was a payphone. In a rage, I shook the black Box. I could hear the nickels inside across a sheet of metal no thicker than the playing card, yet as inaccessible as the moon. But there must be some money in this room. My eyes focus on the battered desk. There was some change in it and a couple of dollar bills. The kind of money a man will leave as a sup to possible burglars. Burglars that meant me. Carefully, I abstracted a single nickel. Number. Please get me San Francisco Sutter 1594. It's Morris Jacobs. Tell him that this is his partner, Ralph Clark, and ask him to accept the charges.

[Jane Wyman]

Thank you. There's an interruption on the line and there may be a slight delay, sir.

[Narrator/Host]

Will you hold on or shall I call you? I'll hold on, but hurry up. Ready? It's important.

[Jane Wyman]

One moment, please.

[Narrator/Host]

As I waited, a glint of light pulled my eyes away from the phone. Far down the road, headlights of a car juggled over the rise and aimed towards me. It was the first car to come by since I'd hit the road. It might be a stray, a farmer starting out before sunup. But I. I couldn't take the chance. Hasty, I hung up the receiver, closed the cash drawer, snapped the lock on the door. Then I crouched beneath the desk.

[Jane Wyman]

Open up.

[Narrator/Host]

Hey, I've tried to wake that geezer before. He sleeps like a dead man. He may be back on the bottle again. I will get him up. Hey, Jerry. Jerry. To my horror, I heard the creek the of bed springs from the rear of the station. A light appeared under the door I thought was just a rear door to the outside. It opened and two hairy barefoot legs under a fan light gun came through and made for the front. Who? Who is it? Ready? And Ross, Open up. Well, you're a fine bunch of cops running out of gas in the middle of the night. Come on, you. 20 of chili with the doorable. That ain't gas. Well, Phillips broke jail. What? Oh, you don't tell me. Well, how did he do that? You see, there was two of them. He had an accomplice, said he was a lawyer. We found their car abandoned on the road back of Ferris Hop. Ran out of gas, so they can't be far away. Say, there was a big reward for Phillips after he broke jail at Bennington, wasn't there? Yeah. Thousand dollars. Hey, you know him, don't you? Yeah. You was in the Bennington Polk when he done that break. What was it, a drunk and disorderly or something? Yeah, I had me a little too much in broker wind in the general store. We was roommates for the night I was pretty scared. How'd he do at the break? Oh, I don't know. I was sleeping it off. Thousand dollars reward, huh? Man can do what a lot with $1,000. Not that he couldn't. Don't you getting any ideas now, that Phillips is a killer. And so is his partner, most likely. Well, I ain't exactly helpless myself. Got a nice little fella on my side. Now, you take my advice, gentlemen. Put that gun away. They show up here, you talk soft. Let us do the capture. Oh, sure, sure. I'll play safe. Well, we'll be going. Just wanted to alert you, Jerry. Yes, thanks. Thanks. So long. All right, you come out from under that desk. Come on out. I say, this gun's mighty nervous. Now, get your hands up and stand over there. Look, mister, I'll do the talking. Who are you? Look, you've got to believe me. I'm not a criminal. I'm a lawyer. Oh, you must be the other one, huh? Keep them hands up. But I got into this by accident. I, I I don't know. He helped me escape. Yes, Phillips. Well, I left him in the car. And that's another thing. You can get the reward. I know who he's going to meet, and they're going to a hideout and. Oh, I see. Who is he going to meet? Well, somebody named Jerry Nichols. He. There you are. If you let me get her that phone, I can clear everything. No, you don't. Stay right where you are. I'll plug you. But that's my partner, my law partner in San Francisco. I only broke in here so I could phone him. He'll identify me. You don't believe me? Oh, I believe you are. Then what? Answer it yourself. You'll see. Not on your life, mister. Do you think I'm out of my mind? But you've got to answer it, Jerry. You don't know what I went through to place that call. You just can't stand it. But, Jerry. You're Jerry Nichols. That's right. So you see, Jerry. Jerry. Who's that? Turn off that light, you. It's Phillips. Stand over there by the window where he can see you. Go on. Jerry. Come on in, Phillips. I ran out of gas and that punk. Jerry, I. What? It happened so fast that for a moment I had no reaction at all. None. I just watched it. Watched Phillips holding his chest with both hands. Watched that giant body twist convulsively on the floor and then lie still. Watched Jerry bend over him, then straighten up. Then as he turned, grinning to me, emotion, feeling Came back. And what I felt was seething, overpowering. Rage, fury. Everything I'd been through this night. It was like a boiler that had to burst. Well, dead or alive, I just made me a thousand. You foul, stinking scum. What? You're worse than he is. Shut up. Maybe I'll get a reward for you, too. A small one. I could feel the bullet land in my side just below the belt, and the avenues of pain spread out like the cracks in the hammered window glass. But somehow, strangely, it didn't stop me. I kept moving to toward him. He backed away, surprised. He was aiming for another shot when we grabbed. I got the gun. He got me by the throat. He stumbled. His hand that was holding the gun. I wouldn't let go. And then, as he fell backwards over the chair, I was on top of him. He wouldn't let go of that gun as we thrashed around there on the floor. Brought his hand up suddenly and smashed his own gun into his face. Then he laughed. I listened. I listened to his heart. He was all right. He was all right. I got up, gasping for breath. And then I realized that I was all right. Yet he'd shot me, hit me. I should be lying there on the plank floor instead of that grotesque heap in the shapeless flannel nightgown. I felt my side with the bullet had struck, brought my hand away. There was no blood on it. Yet there should be blood. I touched the spot again. I fingered the contour of something small and hard and round. I pulled it out of my watch pocket, battered with a slug that struck it, bent almost double a nickel, the 20th part of a dollar. All a man needed to buy a co cup of coffee, to make a phone call, to buy a fine in a kangaroo court to save his life. And I'd had it all the time. I'd had it all the time.

[Jane Wyman]

I'd had it all the time.

[Narrator/Host]

Huh?

[Jane Wyman]

Huh?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh. Oh. Hello.

[Jane Wyman]

I have your party now in San Francisco. Shall I connect you, sir?

[Narrator/Host]

Huh? Yeah, but first. First get the Lansing police station, will you? Operator, Lansing police. Yeah. Shut up, Jerry. You're gonna live, but I'm gonna be in court with you. Yeah, but I wouldn't give a plug nickel for. Suspense. Presented by Autolight Tonight's star, Ray Milan in chicken feed. Say, Mr. Milan, in a recent movie, I saw you as a baseball pitcher. Yes, that's right. You as a pitcher and Paul Douglas as a catcher. Made a wonderful battery. That sounds like a lead in for me to say that Autolite makes a wonderful battery too. You can say that again. All right, I will. Autolite makes a wonderful battery. Right you are, Ray. It's the Autolite stay full that needs water only three times a year in normal car use. Made by Autolight, makers of over 400 products for cars, trucks, airplanes and boats. In 28 auto light plants from coast to coast. Autolite also makes complete electrical systems for many makes of America's finest coast cars. Batteries, spark plugs, generators, starting motors, coils, distributors. All engineered to fit together perfectly, work together perfectly because they're a perfect team. So folks don't accept electrical parts that are supposed to be as good. Ask for and insist on Autolight original factory parts at your neighborhood service station, car dealer, garage or repair shop. Remember, you're always right with Autolite. Next Thursday for suspense. Dorothy McGuire will be our star. The play is called Last Confession. And it is, as we say, a tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. Tonight's suspense play was produced and edited by William Speer and directed by Norman MacDonald. Music for suspense is composed by Lucian Morowek and conducted by Lud Gluskin. Chicken Feed was a radio play by Lawrence Goldman. Raymond appeared through the courtesy of Paramount Pictures, whose current release is Top of the Morning. Starring Bing Crosby, Ann Blythe and Barry Fitzgerald. Don't forget, next Thursday, same time, Autolite will present Suspense, starring Dorothy McGuire.

[Jane Wyman]

You can buy Autolite staple batteries, Autolite resistor, spark plugs, Autolite electrical parts at your neighborhood Autolite dealers. Switch to Autolite. Good night.

[Narrator/Host]

This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Good evening. Lady Esther welcomes you to join the Screen Guild Players in another brilliant Hollywood event. Red Book magazine's annual award to the outstanding picture of 1945. Barry Fitzgerald is here in person to make the awards. But first, the play Lady Esther presents the Red book selection for 1945. The Paramount picture, the Lost Weekend. Starring Ray Milan, Jane Wyman and Frank Phelan. New York, 3rd Avenue. A warm October afternoon. Nat's Bar, a little place, is almost empty. Almost? Not quite. And how is my very good friend nat today? Yes, Mr. Buenum? This being an especially fine afternoon, and I having just acquired two lovely bottles. Which you will perceive in this paper bag at my elbow, I have decided to ask for your hand in marriage. Look, Mr. Boynham. If that is to be your attitude, Nat, I shall have to drown my sorrows in a jigger of rye. Just one, that's all. Sorry, Mr. Boynum, no credit today. And that you'll be glad to know we can barter on a cash basis. You see, Legal tender. One straight ride. That was the idea. Okay, it's your funeral. First one always tastes rotten, don't it? Or maybe you never like the taste again. Say, how about your brother? You told me you and him was going away for the weekend. We were. In fact, we are. On the 6:45, unfortunately. Most unfortunately. My brother Wick was called away by a business matter. I just happen to remember. A telephone call. Pretty sure. And then you duck right out and spend your train fare for liquor, huh? Taking them two bottles with you. Oh, I may never touch them while I'm there. Not a drop. What you don't understand, all of you, is that I've got to know what's around. But I can have it if I need it, that's all. Yeah, I know a lot of guys like that. Take a bottle and put it on the shelf. All they want is just to look at it. Won't even have a corkscrew, just to be sure. Only all of a sudden, they grab the bottle and bite off the neck. Nat, one more reproving word and I'll consult our lawyer about a divorce. Let me wipe up the bar. That glass left a circle. No, no, no. Don't wipe it away, Nat. Let me have my little vicious circle. You know, the circle is the perfect geometric figure. No end, no beginning. Weave me another, Nat. Oh, come on, Nat. One little jigger of dreams. Nope. You don't approve of drinking? Not the way you drink. You're worried about me, huh? Well, don't be, Nat. Just. Just think what it does to my mind. It tosses the sandbags overboard so the balloon can soar. Suddenly I'm competent. Supremely competent. I'm one of the great ones. I'm Michelangelo molding the beard of Moses. I'm Van Gogh painting pure sunlight. I'm Barrymore before the movies got him by the throat. I'm a hold up man. I'm Jesse James, brothers. I'm all three of them. I'm W. Shakespeare. And out there, it's not Third Avenue any longer. It's the. The Nile. Net the Nile and down it moves the barge of Cleopatra. Listen. Purple the sails and so perfumed that the winds were lovesick with them. The oars were silver, which to the tune of lutes kept stroke and made the water which they'd be follow. Keep it up, Don. More lines. And more and more little circles on the bar. 3, 5, 8, 9. So suddenly you realize it's late. Now, grab your bottles and hurry home. But don't go in yet. Don, look up there. First look up. All your wind is dark. Whip must have gone. Sure, he'd be mad enough to go away alone. But Helen. Helen may be around. Watch out she doesn't see you sneaking in. All right, you're in. Now, lock the door. Step. The catch. So far, so good. No, no. Wait a minute. Those bottles. You've got to hide one, Don. That's it. That's fine. In the ceiling light. In the metal bowl. Now set the other bottle by the chair. And pull out that cog and fill the glass. Nothing to stop you anymore, Don. Go on and drink. Drink. No one can see you. It's grown quite dark. Quite dark. Soon. Soon there won't be any light at all. Mr. Burnham, I thought you was going away. I'll have the usual. Look, Mr. Burnham, this is still morning. Pour it, Matt. Okay. It's when you need it most. In the morning. Haven't you learned that yet? At night, it's a drink. In the morning, it's medicine. I'll have another jigger of tonic. How about those two quarts? Did you polish off both them bottles last night? Both? Hey, that's right. I did have two bottles, didn't I? I hid one of them. I've still got it. I'm a capitalist, Ned. I got untapped reserves. I'm rich, Mr. Burnham. If you had enough money, you'd kill yourself in a month. Don't make no difference to me. But it sure is tough on that girl. What girl? The one in the leopard coat. She was in again last night looking for you. That's an awful high class young lady. You bet she is. How the heck she ever gets mixed up with a guy that sops it up like you do? It's a problem, isn't it? That nice young man who drinks in the high class young lady. And why does she drink? And why doesn't he stop? That's my novel, Nat. Morbid stuff. Nothing but the Book of the Month Club. A horror story. The Confessions of a booze addiction. The lug book of an alcoholic. Oh, come on. That breakdown. I'm empty again. You know what I'm gonna call my novel? The Bottle. That's all very simple. The Bottle. Got it all on my mind. Let me tell you the first chapter. The man with the bottle meets a girl. Extra special girl. He meets her, makes a date, goes on the wagon for six weeks. He's in love. Huh? That's what's gonna be so hard to write. Love's the hardest thing in the world to write about. So simple. You've got to catch it through details. The early morning sunlight hitting the ash cans in front of our house. A ringing telephone that sounds like Beethoven's Pastoral. A letter scribbled on our office stationery that smells like all the lilacs in Ohio. And no drinking. He thinks he's cured. If he can find a job now, they can be married, and that's that. But it isn't, Nat. Not quite. Because. Fill me up, Matt. I'll tell you why. You see, it's a few months later now, and she's written to folks all about the fellow. They've come all the way from Ohio to meet him. He's supposed to be at their hotel at noon, but suddenly he's scared. He knows he can't face him, not like that. Not cold. He needs a drink. Just one. And so he takes just one. And then another. And then another. Then all of a sudden, it's five o' clock and he's still there at home with his bottle. He's drunk. He's. When a girl comes up to find out what's happened, that's how she finds it.

[Jane Wyman]

Don, I understand. Of course I do. You were a little nervous about meeting my folks, so you took a few drinks. What of it? Most people drink a little.

[Narrator/Host]

Sure. The lucky ones who can take it or leave it. But then there are the ones who can't take it and can't leave it either. Helen, what I'm trying to say is I'm not a drinker. I'm a drunk.

[Jane Wyman]

Darling, we can go over this tomorrow. Right now.

[Narrator/Host]

You've heard the facts. That's all there is to it.

[Jane Wyman]

I've heard them, and they're not very pleasant. But they could be worse. After all, you're not an embezzler or a murderer. You can be cured.

[Narrator/Host]

That has a familiar ring to it.

[Jane Wyman]

There must be some reason why you drink. The right doctor can.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm way ahead of the right doctor. I know the reason. The reason is me, what I am. Or rather, what I'm not.

[Jane Wyman]

What aren't? The doctors. What aren't you that you want to be, Don?

[Narrator/Host]

A writer. Silly, isn't it? Because I could be. I was until that guy started looking over my shoulder and whispering in a thin, clear voice like the E string on a violin. Don Burnham, he'd whisper. It's not good enough. How about a couple of drinks, just to put it on its feet, huh? So I had a couple that made all the difference. Suddenly I could see the whole thing. The tragic sweep of the great Novel. Beautifully proportioned. But before I could grab it and throw it out on paper, the drink would wear off and everything would be gone. Then there was despair. And I drink the counterbalance. Despair. Wanting to counterbalance the counterbalance. And that guy would be always at my shoulder.

[Jane Wyman]

What guy? Who are you talking about?

[Narrator/Host]

The other Don Burnham. There are two of us, you know. Don the rider and Don the drunk. I tried to break away from that other one a lot of ways. Once I even hucked my typewriter on board a gun. Yeah. Still got the bullets.

[Jane Wyman]

Don.

[Narrator/Host]

I meant to do it on my 30th birthday. But that other Don wanted us to have a drink first. He always does. The gun went for three quarts of whiskey. The flop suicide of a flop writer.

[Jane Wyman]

But you are a writer. You have every quality for it. Wit, imagination, pity.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, come on. Let's face reality. I'm 33. I've never done anything. I'm not doing anything. I never will. Will do anything. 0, 0, 0.

[Jane Wyman]

But you will. We'll straighten all this out.

[Narrator/Host]

Helen, for your own good. You'd better go sit down.

[Jane Wyman]

I'm gonna make some coffee.

[Narrator/Host]

Go on. Clear out. Clear out while you can.

[Jane Wyman]

Because I've got a rival? Because you think you're in love with a bottle? You don't know me, Don. I'm gonna fight and fight and fight and don't try and argue. Bend down.

[Narrator/Host]

That was three years ago, Nat. That's a long time to keep fighting, to keep believing. A sanatorium, a health farm, a psychiatrist. Nothing worked. And still she holds on. She knows she's clutching a razor, but she won't let go. Three years of it. Yeah. And how does it come out? I don't know. I haven't figured that far. Want me to tell you? Well, one day your guy gets wise to himself and gets back that gun. Or if he's only got a $10, he goes up to the top of the Empire State Building. Way up on top. And then? Or he can do it for a nickel in the subway under a train. Like that. But what if Helen's right after all? He sits down and turns out something good, but good. And that pulls him up and snaps him out of it. This guy? Not from where I sit. Oh, you're wrong, Nat. I'm gonna do it. That's why I didn't go on that weekend. See, this time I've got it, Nat. I'm going home. I'm gonna write.

[Jane Wyman]

Right.

[Narrator/Host]

The second act of the Lost Weekend. Starring Ray Milan, Jane Wyman and Frank Phelan will follow in just a moment. Now a word from Lady Esther.

[Jane Wyman]

Have you ever entered a half lit room where everything was dark and gloomy? Everything seemed lost in shadow? Suddenly, bright lights flash on. The shadows are gone. The room and everything in it wakens comes to life. That difference between dark and light, between shadows and brilliant clarity, is the difference, I promise, in the appearance of your skin. A radiant, beautiful difference. With just one application of Lady Esther face cream. Yes, a difference you can see a difference as unmistakable as light flashing on in a darkened room. Yes, one application of Lady Esther face cream and your whole appearance seems to waken, seems to come to life. And what's more, I prove it to you. I prove it in 30 seconds with the patch test. To make this test, just smooth a little Lady Esther face cream on one patch of skin. Like one cheek. Wipe it off, then compare that cheek with the other. See the difference for yourself. See the clear, fresh look of that patch of skin. And then touch it with your fingertips. Feel the difference. You see? Lady Esther face cream. This one cream by itself thoroughly cleans your skin, softens it, helps nature refine the pores. And finally, it leaves a wonderfully smooth base on which powder looks fascinating. And remember, all I ask is the chance to prove what I say. Not in 30 days or even 30 minutes, but in 30 seconds. The patch test will prove every claim I make for Lady Esther for purpose face cream.

[Narrator/Host]

And now, Act 2 of the Lost weekend. The Burnham apartment, the living room, the portable typewriter on the desk. Two shaking hands slip a sheet of

[Howard Da Silva]

paper in the machine.

[Narrator/Host]

And slowly, grimly begin to type the bottle. The novel by Don Branham. For Helen with all my love. With all my love. All right, Don, what now? Where do you go from here? How do you start? That first little ascendant is agony, isn't it? Maybe a cigarette would help. Write down the table by. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't notice. That bottle, Don. That was from last night. Last night? That was great, wasn't it? You know, Mimi, that's just what you really need. A drink. Just one. Just one drink to get you started. No, no, no. Not that bottle. That's empty. Remember? You want the other one, the one you hid. That's right. It might be in the closet, Don. It's worth a look. Not there. Then how about the kitchen? You know, the top shelf, the place you always listen. No, no, it must be in the living room. The bookies, Don. Back of those books. But it's got to be here. It's got to be somewhere. You had another body.

[Howard Da Silva]

You know you did.

[Narrator/Host]

Where'd you put it? You're not crazy. Where'd you put that other body? Hold it. Look up. Right over your head. The light fixture. Dawn. That's where you. Wait a minute. The door. Sure. You gotta lock the faux door first. And step. The safety catch on. That's it. Now no one can get in. No one. Don. You're all alone. You're all alone. And it's growing dark. It's growing dark again. It's growing dark. Stop it. Heaven. Stop it. Stop it. I'm all right. I just can't stop. Stop it. Sure, Don. Sure you're all right. All you need is a drink. One drink this morning. You'll be fine all day. Tough luck, though. Bottle zamping. Any money? Not a dime. Nat Got it yesterday. No credit either. No nothing. Unless you want to use that portable. Why not? Why don't you d. Why don't you give it to Nat? Why don't you get some good out of it? Now you're talking. Rip the paper out, slap on the lid and let's get going. Sure, I know you're weak and the thing's heavy, but it's only tonight. That's just a block and a half. Come on, start walking. You need the drink, boy. Nat. Nat. Mr. Bohum. What's the matter? Let me have one, Nat. I'm dying. Just one, please. I thought you were home writing that book. Oh, he tricked me. The same old dirty trick. Give me one. I'll pay you when I can.

[Jane Wyman]

I just.

[Narrator/Host]

Just don't let me die here. No credit and you know it. All right, so it's charity I'm begging for you. What?

[Jane Wyman]

Just.

[Narrator/Host]

Just give me one. Yeah, one. One's too many, and a hundred's not enough. Here, Ned. That's all. Oh, please, please. I'll pay. I'll let you have my typewriter. I'm no writer. You're the writer. Now, go on home. Go home. And you better take something to quiet yourself. You're heading straight for the DTs. I'm not. I'm not. That's what they all say until they start seeing the little animals. Oh, shut up. You know that stuff about pink elephants? That's the bunk. It's the little animals. Little tiny turkeys in straw hats. Midget monkeys coming through the keyholes. With one guy I know, it used to be beetles. Beetles crawling all over him in the dark. That's when it comes, you know, in the dark. Oh, stop it. Stop it. Matt, please. Please, just one. I'll die if you don't. You'll die if I do. Here. Five bucks. But drink it up somewhere else. I don't want that kind of money. Here. Done. Come on, guy, wake up. That's the trouble, isn't it? Huh? You always have to wake up. Sort of gray, shot down. What do you think? Dawn or dusk? What day is this, you suppose? Saturday? Nah, couldn't be. You couldn't have finished two bottles that soon. Sure you had two bottles. Nat gave you the money, remember? Good old Nat. Nice kind, but all wrong. All that stuff about that dog, the little animals. Not till you. It couldn't happen to you. Why, it's almost dark now. And you're okay. Sure? Yeah, sure. What's that? That sound seems to be coming from the war. Yeah, there it is. Strange. Right in the middle of the war. Mouse. That's all it is. Wait, there's something else here. It's flying around. Watch yourself. Watch yourself. It's a bat. He's going after the mouse. He's got him. Done. He's got him. Look. There on the wall. Is bled blood.

[Jane Wyman]

Don. Don, it's me. It's Helen.

[Narrator/Host]

No. No.

[Jane Wyman]

The woman downstairs phoned me. She promised she'd let me know when you came home. She heard you scream.

[Narrator/Host]

Go away. Go away, silly.

[Jane Wyman]

I came to help you. Come on now. Get up. Put your hand on my shoulder. No. Wait. We need some light.

[Narrator/Host]

No. Hell, no.

[Jane Wyman]

What's wrong, Doc?

[Narrator/Host]

The wall. Don't look. What wall? There. Over there. The mice in the bed. That hole in the wall.

[Jane Wyman]

There isn't any hole in the wall.

[Narrator/Host]

Look. But I saw it. I saw it.

[Jane Wyman]

You had some kind of nightmare. Stop shaking, John. Everything will be all right. I'll stay right with you. You'll get some food and sleep.

[Narrator/Host]

Little animals. It's always the little animals. That's what he said. That's what he said.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, you're not making much sense.

[Narrator/Host]

What he said about the ending. Like this or like that. Like this or like that.

[Jane Wyman]

Darling, what you need is a good night's sleep. Don, you wake yet? Come on, lazybones. It's time to get up. I've got toast and coffee and scrambled eggs and. Don? Don, did you hear me? Don? Don. Why don't you gone? He's not here. He's gone.

[Narrator/Host]

Yeah. Oh, good morning, miss.

[Jane Wyman]

Excuse me. Did someone come in here this morning to pawn? Yes, There it is on the rack. That leopard coat, huh? I want it back. It's mine.

[Narrator/Host]

It's your coat.

[Jane Wyman]

It's all right. He had my permission. How much did you give him?

[Narrator/Host]

He didn't want any money. He wanted to swap it.

[Jane Wyman]

For what?

[Narrator/Host]

Something he hawked here a long time back.

[Jane Wyman]

What gun?

[Narrator/Host]

Don. Helen. How the devil did you get in?

[Jane Wyman]

I got the pass key from the janitor. The safety latch wasn't on.

[Narrator/Host]

What's the matter? Why are you looking about this way?

[Jane Wyman]

No reason. I. I just wanted to be sure I left everything right.

[Narrator/Host]

Well, I. I'd like to finish up a few things before Wick gets back.

[Howard Da Silva]

You better run along.

[Narrator/Host]

And thank you.

[Jane Wyman]

Don't. There was some whiskey left when I cleaned up last night.

[Narrator/Host]

Was that.

[Jane Wyman]

Would you like to know where I put the bottle?

[Narrator/Host]

No.

[Jane Wyman]

Don't you want a drink, Don?

[Narrator/Host]

No.

[Jane Wyman]

It's right here in the umbrella stand. Why don't you?

[Narrator/Host]

Don, I don't feel like a drink. Not now. I told you.

[Jane Wyman]

Just one. Here's a glass. Please.

[Narrator/Host]

Say, what are you up to?

[Jane Wyman]

Drink it. You need it, Don. I want you to drink it. I'll get you some more. I'll get you all you want.

[Narrator/Host]

What kind of talk is that?

[Jane Wyman]

I will. I mean it. I'd rather have you drunk than dead.

[Narrator/Host]

Dead? Who wants to be dead?

[Jane Wyman]

Don't lie to me. You have a gun and bullets. If those bullets aren't in this drawer.

[Narrator/Host]

All right, they're not there. So what? This business is just a formality? Don Burnham is dead already. He died over this weekend.

[Jane Wyman]

That's not true.

[Narrator/Host]

It is. He died of moral anemia. Fear of shame, of DTs.

[Jane Wyman]

That Don Burnham. And now you want to kill the other one.

[Narrator/Host]

What other one?

[Jane Wyman]

There were two Dons. You told me so yourself. Don Burnham the drunk, and Don Burnham the rider. It's just the drunk who died. So the rider's free. No one to whisper anymore. No one to interfere.

[Narrator/Host]

Stop trying to storm me. It's too late, Helen. What do you expect? A miracle?

[Jane Wyman]

Yes. Yes. Yes. If I could only make you wait.

[Narrator/Host]

Who is it? It's me, Mr. Boynam. I got something for you. Come in, Nat. What is it? The other night at my place, you forgot your typewriter. Thought I'd bring it up. Thank you. Nat writes real good. I oiled her up a little. I didn't oil her up so you could hock it.

[Jane Wyman]

I'll take it, Nat.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, sure. Well, goodbye, Mr. Burnham. And how's all them lilacs in Ohio?

[Jane Wyman]

Don't. This is it. It happened. I didn't ask for a big miracle.

[Narrator/Host]

Helen, you're not serious.

[Jane Wyman]

Somebody is. Somebody somewhere. Sent this typewriter to you.

[Narrator/Host]

Why?

[Jane Wyman]

Because he means you to write.

[Narrator/Host]

Write what? I tried. Couldn't even find a first line.

[Jane Wyman]

Of course you couldn't. You couldn't write the beginning when you didn't know the ending.

[Narrator/Host]

The end is a question mark, Helen. Will be as long as I live.

[Jane Wyman]

Don't say that, Don.

[Narrator/Host]

Give me a. Helen, that glass. I'll take it now.

[Jane Wyman]

Don. Don, you dropped your cigarette in that.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes, Helen. There's a question mark after every story. Love, will it last? Success, does it bring happiness? Death, Is it heaven or hell or sleep? All right. This strength of mine, such as it is, will it hold out? We'll try. On behalf of the Motion Picture Relief Fund, thank you, Ray Milland, Jane Wyman and Frank Phelan. For your deeply moving performances. Which bring us, quite fittingly, to the Red Book magazine awards for 1945. As you all know, Red Book Magazine annually awards the Red Book Cup. For what it deems the outstanding screen achievement of the year. And it is Lady Esther's annual custom. To invite one of the previous year's winning cast. To make the presentation on behalf of Redbook. Last year's winner, of course, was Going My Way. And here in person is Barry Fitzgerald. Thank you very much. Well, I've just this to say. This is a beautiful cup. And Leo McCary, Bing Crosby. And I have valued having it for a year. Now it goes into other hands. And I'm sure that millions of people all over America will agree with Mr.

[Jane Wyman]

Edwin Bohmer, editor of Red Book.

[Narrator/Host]

And Mr. Thornton Delahunty, its motion picture critic. That the cub is going to the proper people. The men behind the lost weekend. Jane, call the boys.

[Jane Wyman]

Come on, Charlie. Come on, Billy.

[Narrator/Host]

Go ahead, Ray, introduce them. Ladies and gentlemen, our two in one boss, who between them wrote, produced and directed the picture. Mr. Charles Brackett and Mr. Billy Wilder. Ladies and gentlemen, this is an honor indeed. In accepting it, Mr. Wilder. And I want to thank the people who made the picture possible. Charles Jackson, for his brilliant novel. The Paramount front office, for giving us the green light. You, Ray, and you, Jane, and the whole cast. John Seitz, the cameraman. Doane Harrison, the editor. Nicholas Rocha, for his magnificent music. Billy, is there anyone I've forgotten? Ah, yes. A word of thanks to the man who helped us with our research. To Mr. W.C. fields, for graciously permitting us to peek at the X rays of his kidney. Wait a minute, Willie. Let's be serious. Speaking for all who worked in it, let me say that we are proud that a story like The Lost Weekend should ever have been brought to the screen. We think it marks a forward step towards Hollywood's real coming of age. And if the screen can approach all human problems with this same sort of frankness, this same sympathy and the same desire to help, then Hollywood will have justified this place and its importance in our lives. And that's about all, except for all of us. Thanks to Red Book, thanks to Lady Esther and good night. And now, before we tell you about next week's show, here's a word from one of America's best known beauty authorities. Lady Esther.

[Jane Wyman]

Do you know what many women have written me about Lady Esther Bridal Pink, my new shade of face powder. It's really very interesting. They say that Bridal Pink has a flattering effect on their features as well as their skin. They say it actually makes their features look smaller and daintier. It's true that Lady Esther Bridal Pink has certain fascinating qualities you won't find in any other powder shade. But I think the most important thing is the way Bridal Pink gives a softer, younger look to the skin. Why, some women tell me they look as much as 10 years younger the instant they apply Lady Esther Bridal Pink face powder. And it doesn't matter whether you're blonde or brunette, whether your hair is auburn or brown. Bridal Pink is intensely flattering to almost every skin it touches. Lady Esther face Powder is so fine in texture, it completely covers and hides tiny lines. Even little freckles and other blemishes seem to disappear. Your skin takes on a smooth, flawless look. Try this tomorrow for a real thrill. First, apply Lady Esther face Cream. Wipe it off. Then apply Lady Esther Bridal Pink face powder. What a radiant new face you'll present to the world. Remember lady Esther 4 purpose face cream. Lady Esther Bridal Pink face Powder.

[Narrator/Host]

Next week, the Lady Esther Screen Guild Players will present History Is Made at Night. It will star Virginia Bruce and Paul Lucas. Be sure to listen. The lost weekend was presented through the courtesy of Paramount Pictures, whose current release is the Stork Club, starring Betty Hutton. Jane Wyman appeared through the courtesy of Warner Brothers producers of Night and Day. Ray Milan can soon be seen in the Paramount picture. Kitty Frank Phelan will soon be seen in the Paramount production, the Blue Dahlia. You save enough on the largest sized jar of Lady Esther face cream to buy a box of Lady Esther face powder. So remember, ask for the largest size. Music on tonight's program was arranged and conducted by Wilbur Hatch. This is Truman Bradley speaking for Lady Esther. Thank you and Good night. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System, The Jack Benny Program. In a cigarette, it's the tobacco that counts. And Lucky strike means fine tobacco. 49American. Yes, lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. LSMFT. LSMFT. LSMft. Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So for your own real deep down smoking enjoyment, smoke that smoke of fine tobacco. Lucky Strike. Excuse me. This is Kenny Delmar. Excuse me. I have a special announcement to make. Herbert Tarrington cigarettes are back. Good news for those who prefer a cork tip cigarette. Herbert Tartan is back, and there's something about them you'll like. Herbert Tartan is back. After being made only for the armed forces. Yes, Herbert Tartan is back. That cork tip cigarette. Herbert Tartan available now for you. Yes, Herbert Tartan is back. And remember, there's something about them you like. There's something about them you like. This is Kenny Delmar. I trust you will welcome home. Herbert Tartan. There's something about them you like. The lucky strike program starring ray milan. With barry livingston, phil harris, rochester, larry stevens and yours truly, don wilson. And now, ladies and gentlemen, we bring you our master of ceremonies, a man who. Wait a minute. Down. Wait a minute. What's the idea of saying the Lucky Strike Program starring Ray Milan? Well, Jack, I didn't see anybody get up and walk out. I mean, that has nothing to do with it.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, Jack, stop pouting. Your lower lip looks like a shoehorn.

[Narrator/Host]

I'm not pouting. Well, you told us yourself that Ray Milan was going to be our guest. That still doesn't entitle him to top billing. He's just a star in pictures. I'm a star of stage, screen and radio.

[Jane Wyman]

And we'll milk cows if you back him into Beverly Hills.

[Narrator/Host]

Now you're just being smart. I merely said that Don didn't have to give Ray Milan star billing when he's only going to be our guest. Jack, I only did that as a matter of courtesy. Don, if you want to be courteous, do it on the Jenny Sim show, not mine. And another thing, Jackson, I don't know what you're beefing about. I've been with you for eight years and I've never had no star billing. Bill, you've been with me for 10 years. I don't count the two years I was auditioning. Look, just be happy you got the job. Now, let's get on with. Gosh, Ray Milan should have been here a half hour ago. I can't understand what's holding him up. I saw his picture, Jackson. I couldn't understand what held him up either.

[Jane Wyman]

Yeah, I saw the picture. I went to the box office, bought a ticket and they gave me my change and pretzels.

[Narrator/Host]

Stop with the gags already. I'm gonna call Ray's home.

[Jane Wyman]

Jack, Jack. Jack, you don't have to. Ray Milan just came in.

[Narrator/Host]

He did? Good, good. Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce our guest, one of the finest actors in Hollywood, the star of the Lost weekend and winner of this year's Academy Award, Ray Milan. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you very much. Say, Ray. Ray, how come you're so late? I'm sorry, Jack, but I stopped over the new newspaper office to put an ad in for a butler. Oh, I. I thought you had a butler. Oh, I have three, as a matter of fact, but they want a fourth for bridge. Oh, well, wouldn't it be cheaper to teach them gin rummy and let one of them go?

[Jane Wyman]

If it was Jack, he'd teach him solitaire and let two of them go.

[Narrator/Host]

Harry, please. Well, Ray, it certainly is a wonderful achievement getting the Oscar. Tell me, how did it make you feel winning the Academy Award? Oh, I don't know, Jack. I don't feel any different. I'm still the same sweet, modest, lovable fellow I always was. Gee, if I ever wanted, I'd be a louse. Gosh, Ray, what I wouldn't give just to see the Oscar. Well, Jack, by coincidence, I just happen to have it with me, weighs 25 pounds. He just happens to have. Let me. Let me see it, Ray. Yeah, yeah. Gee, isn't it cute? A bronze Oscar with a little ice bag on its head. You know, Ray, this may surprise surprise you, but I've never won an Academy Award. Why, Jack Benny, you haven't.

[Jane Wyman]

Why, Ray Milan, what a performance.

[Narrator/Host]

Mary, quiet.

[Jane Wyman]

Oh, Jack. Jack, why don't you introduce me?

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, yes, yes, I'm sorry. Ray, I want you to meet the members of my cast. This is Mary Livingston. Hello, Mary. I'm glad to know you.

[Jane Wyman]

I'm pleased to meet you. Mr. Milan, would you consider going out with a girl who doesn't drink?

[Narrator/Host]

Mary, please. Why, certainly, Mary. In fact, I like to go out with girls who don't drink. What are you laughing at?

[Jane Wyman]

Jack likes to go out with girls who don't eat.

[Narrator/Host]

They're hard to find. Sister. And Ray. Ray. Hey, this is. This is Phil Harris. Hello, Phil. Amateur. Amateur. Phil, you wouldn't appreciate this, but Lost Weekend was something new, something daring. I doubt if any other Actor would have the stomach, the courage. I mean, I doubt if any other actor would have the courage to attempt a role like that. Well, that shows you how much you know, Jackson. Right now, Gary Cooper's doing the same thing in Saratoga, drunk. That's trunk. Saratoga Trump. Well, I'm glad you told me. I ain't gonna waste my cabbage. Going to see a lot of baggage. Yeah, baggage. Now, Ray, the reason I. Phil, why are you staring at Ray like that? I'm just admiring the guy, Jackson. He does it and gets an Academy Award. I do it and get a hangover. Well, it's still the weekend. Go get lost. Now, Ray, the reason I asked you. Jack. Jack, do you mind if I ask Mr. Milan a favor? Why, no, no. What is it? Done. Well, gosh, Ray, you're such a great actor and everything. Oh, well, you're so. You're so sweet and modest and lovable. I know, I know. No, well, I read something in Shakespeare that I'd like to hear you do. You know the speech that starts out, to be or not to be? Oh, yeah, that's Hamlet's soliloquy. Why, certainly, Don. I'll be glad to do it. Good, good. I copied the speech myself and made just a few minor changes. Well, that's all right. Just give it to me and I'll be glad to read it. Here you are. Thanks. Quiet, everybody. Lsr mft that is the question. Here, here. Whether tis nobler in the minds of men who know tobacco best to be so round so per. So fully packed. Here, here. Or to be so free and easy on the draw. Here, Here. Where? Where? Here. And so, good citizen, remember the quality of 40 years old. You carry my own. That's all American. You work for your boss and I'll work for mine. Oh, yeah. Now, Ray. Ray, the reason I asked you to come over here is because tonight, for our feature attraction, we're going to do our version of your picture, the Lost Weekend. Now, naturally, since I'm the. The star of this program, the leading role will be played by me. Now, wait a minute, Jack. Don't you think that as long as I originated the part in the picture, I should also play it here? I do not. I mean, just. Just because you won an Academy Award has nothing to do with it. After all, when I was your age, I could have won an Oscar, too. Except there were no Academy Awards in those days.

[Jane Wyman]

There were no movies either.

[Narrator/Host]

Now. And darn few people. They may have had awfully long arms, but they were still people. Anyway, Ray, I think I should play the lead. But, Jack, that doesn't make sense. Friends, you brought me up here because of the lost weekend and you give me nothing to do. Well, maybe. Say, I've got a wonderful idea. Let's both play the part. We'll be twin brothers. Twin brothers? Yeah. We'll give him a double feature. We'll be the Burnham brothers. How about it? Okay with me. That's fine. Now, Phil, you'll be our older brother who tries to convince us that drinking is very evil. Who's gonna convince me, Phil? It's just a part. After all. You know I don't drink. And neither does Ray. Now, Mary, you're gonna play Jane Wyman's part, the girl that Ray and I are in love with. But you can't make up your mind which one of us you want.

[Jane Wyman]

The UNO should have problems that easy.

[Narrator/Host]

Mary, don't be so sure. You know, you might have to take Ray. Now, this play. Well, go on immediately after the. I'll take it. Hello?

[Jane Wyman]

Telephone call for Mr. Ray Milan.

[Narrator/Host]

Oh, just a minute. It's for you, Ray. For me? Well, hello. Hello, Mr. Milan? This is Rochester. I saw by an ad in the paper that you warned a butler, and I called up to find out about it. But. But aren't you already working? I sure am. Well, why are you dissatisfied with your present position? Well, I've concluded that any relationship between the hours I work and the money I get is purely coincidental. You consider yourself undefaid, huh? How much are you making now? Frankly, I'm ashamed to tell you, but if I have a suit cleaned and go to a movie in the same week, one of them has to be on the installment plan. Well, you spoke of long hours. What kind of hours have you been working? From 8 in the morning till dark. Well, those aren't such long hours for a butler working until dark. Under normal conditions, no. But Mr. Benny has a sun lamp outside the kitchen window to fool me, and. And that sun lamp fools you? Not only me. His chickens have been laying six eggs a day. I see. Well, if you go to work for me, you'll find that your duties won't be hard, but they'll be exacting. Exacting? Yes. For instance, I like my breakfast served in bed. But unlike other people, I can't wait. I want it there when I awaken. Yes, sir. Do you think you could have my breakfast ready the minute I wake up? Yes, sir. I'll pull the clock out the night before. Now, wait a minute. Now, wait a minute. I think you have a Mission idea about my drinking. Rochester, Because I never. Rochester. Ray. Let me at that phone. Hello? Rochester, is that you? Uh. Oh. Rochester, why did you call up Ray Millan looking for a job? It was an accident, boss. I called up the Home Way laundry and got this number by mistake. The laundry? Then why'd you ask for Ray Milan? I didn't. I asked for May Dilban. Mae Dillband. She's a starch girl on the fourth toe. Rochester, that's a mighty weak story. What do you expect on a moment's notice, a bestseller? Stop being funny and I'll talk to you when I get home. Goodbye. Goodbye. Imagine doing a thing like that behind my back. Come on, Larry, let's have a song. Come closer to me so I can see heaven in your eyes Come closer to me so I can be close to paradise Thrill me with your kisses let me learn what bliss is Kiss me once and then we'll kiss and kiss again and life will be be divine Come closer my dear so I can hear music in my heart I've waited so long to hear the song that your love will start Darling on a adore you live my whole life for you All I ask is this Please give me one more kiss and whisper you'll be mine All I ask is this Please give me one more kiss and whisper you be mine. That was Come Closer to Me sung by Larry Stevens. Very good, Larry. I bought that record you made of that song and it's swell.

[Howard Da Silva]

Thank you, Mr. Benny.

[Narrator/Host]

And now, ladies and gentlemen, for our feature attraction tonight, our version of the Academy Award winning picture, the Lost Weekend. As our story opens, Ray and Jack Burnham, twin brothers, have been persuaded by their elder brother Philip to go to the country for the weekend. At the moment, the twin brothers are in the room packing curtains. Music. Gosh, Jack, I don't know why we have to go away in this weekend. Neither do I, but brother Philip insists upon it. Are we all packed? Oh, just about. Shirts, ties, sweaters, socks, quartz fits and pints.

[Howard Da Silva]

Good.

[Narrator/Host]

And put the bottles on the other side of the suitcase. My underwear is snapping at them. Now, let's see. Hello, boys. Hello, brother. Phyllis, those bottles again. Now look, boys, you gotta stop this drinking because we're all going out the country for a weekend and the fresh air will do us a lot of good. Well, I'm not going now. Sure you are. Think of it, fellas. Chickens, horses, rabbits and the scent of new moon hay. Now you've just got to go because it'll be a wonderful weekend. Why do we have to go because we want it on truth or consequences. Oh, now, look, boys, I hate to keep lecturing, but don't you know how bad liquor is for you? Don't you realize that alcohol is your worst enemy? Liquor isn't good for you. Now, you should stay away from it. Ladies and gentlemen, the opinions expressed by Mr. Harris are written in the script and are not necessarily his own. All right, we'll go to the country with you. Well, you better get ready. We're leaving on the 7:15 train. Goodbye, boys. Goodbye. Hi, Brother Philip. Philip. Gee, I hate to go away for a weekend. Me too. I was figuring on losing this one. Yeah.

[Jane Wyman]

Quick.

[Narrator/Host]

Brother Phillip's coming back. Hide those bottles. Okay. There. Come in. Oh, it's you, Jane.

[Jane Wyman]

Hello, boys. I just saw Philip and he told me you're all going away for the weekend.

[Narrator/Host]

Yes, we are.

[Jane Wyman]

You boys are so wonderful. You know, sometimes I request regret that you two are twins. I just can't make up my mind.

[Narrator/Host]

Make up your mind? What do you mean?

[Jane Wyman]

Well, there are two of you and only one of me.

[Narrator/Host]

That's funny. We always see two of you. Yeah.

[Jane Wyman]

Well, don't forget, boys, your train leaves at 7:15.

[Narrator/Host]

Goodbye. Goodbye, brother Phillip. We mean goodbye to Jamie. Gee, what twins we are. We both make the same mistake. Quick, she's gone. Let's open the bottle. Okay. Oh, gee. Look, we've only got two bottles left. Well, let's drink one and hide the other. Okay. I'll put it up there in the chandelier. Good. Oh, darn it. I can't reach it. Well, give it to me. I'm higher than you are. You are not. I can do it. All right. But don't screw the bottle into the socket like you did the last time I turn on the switch and blew out a powerhouse at Boulder Dam. Don't worry, don't worry. There. The bottles and the chandelier. Now let's open the other one. Oh, boys. Yes, Brother Phillip? Jane and I are going to the. Wait a minute. Give me that bottle. I'm gonna pour it down the sink. Oh, no, no, Brother Philip. Don't pour it down the sink. That's right, Brother Philip. Let Ray drink it. That stuff will eat out the plumbing. Well, I don't care, boys. I'm not going to give it back to you. And remember, you're not to leave this room until it's time to go to the train. We won't, Brother Philip. Come on, Jack. He's gone. Let's go down to Nat's bar room and he'll give us a drink. Okay. Come on, man, set them up. Set them up. Yes. How are you? Nothing doing. Not another drop until you paid the bill you ran up this afternoon. How much do we owe you? $18,000. All right, all right. You can keep your old liquor. We ain't going to the country. Come on. Come on, Ray. Let's go. All right, hold me up. No, you hold me up. I held you up yesterday. Mmm. Smell that fresh air. Yeah, isn't it awful? Nothing wrong with this country. It's full of it. Come on, let's go down the corner to Joe's Bar. That won't do us any good. I haven't got any money. Neither of them, Not on nickel. Let's try the other side of the street. This singer won't get us any drinks. I'll go home and get my violin. That's my line. I'm tired. Let's lie down here in the gutter. Okay. Wait a minute, Ray. Don't you want to put your head up on the curb? No, I always sleep without a pillow. My feet are cold. Pull up that manhole cover. Now I'm comfy. They can't keep me in here. I'm Napoleon. They can't keep me in here. I'm Napoleon. Well, get on my back. I'm your horse. Ray. Ray, where are we? I don't know. Best ask that man in a white coat. Oh, yes. Say, mister. Yes? Where are we? You're in the alcoholic ward. Alcoholic ward? I want to get out of here. Let me out. Yes, let's out of here. Oh, you don't want to leave until you've seen the floors. Floor show? Yes. In the middle of the night, you start seeing things you won't see pink elephants. You're going to see red, white and blue turkeys. Oh, goody. They changed the bill. And then you're going to see tiny rabbits in straw hats. Midget monkeys that come through the keyhole. You know the kind of talent that's handled by Madman Mon. You'll see thousands of little snakes that knit themselves into a sweater. And that isn't all. Oh, I can stop it. But you can. You're going to see beetles. 23 of them running in the center need a handicap, and 11 of them are in the fields. There'll be grasshoppers five feet tall. And there'll be woodpeckers pecking on your head. To pack, pack, pack, pack, pack, pack, pack, pack, pack, pack. Yes, sir, you bet. And how.

[Jane Wyman]

Stop it.

[Narrator/Host]

Stop it. Stop it. Let it down. Again before the floor show. And it'll start as soon as it gets dark. It's like the doctor was saying to me. Delirium is a disease of the night. Well, good night. Ray. Ray's gone. Now's our chance to get out. There's an open window. Okay, let's go. Well, here we are, back in our room. That's funny. We didn't even open the door. No, we crawled in under it. Oh, I see. You know, Jack, we'll either have to give up drinking or get our knees half sold. Come on, let's look for that bottle we hid. Let's see now, where do we put it? Maybe it's in this dresser. Yes, the dresser. The dresser. Maybe it's behind the bookcase. No, it isn't here either. We gotta find that bottle. Maybe it's behind the sofa. Help me move it out. Yeah, the sofa. The sofa. We gotta find that bottle. Wait a minute. The china closet. Yeah, yeah, the kind of. Paper plate. The bottle isn't there. I'm getting weak. I got to have a drink. Sit down and rest a wide. Ray, get your mind off of it. I'll turn on the radio. There. I'll sit down. But I got to have a drink. I tell you, I got to have a drink. Get that off. Oh, find that bottle. Find that bottle. I got to have a drink. Wait a minute. It's getting dark now. Turn on the lights. Well, there goes another powerhouse at Boulder. Here it is. Ray, we found the bottle. We found it. Yeah, we found it. We found it. Say, Ray, I was just thinking. Wouldn't it be awful if Mother were here? Yeah. There isn't enough for three of. I'm sorry. We blew out the lights. Now we're in the dark. Can you imagine that guy in the hospital saying we were going to see little animals? Yeah. Let me have a drink. What'd you say? I didn't say anything. Oh, give me another drink, huh? I didn't say anything. Do you mean to stand there flapping your wings and tell me you didn't say anything? I haven't got wings. Then what are you doing on the chandelier? I'm not on the chandelier. Well, there's something up on the. Look, it's a bat. It's a bat. I see it. It's picking the straw hair off the little monkey. Oh, the monkey. He's coming at me. He's coming at me, getting away from me. Keep him away from me. This full little animal. And here come more of them. They're Crazy in the keyhole this morning. The are getting closer. They're surrounding us. Ray. Ray, look out. I get him and I. Oh, thank heaven they're gone. Tell me, Ray, what did you do? I threw my Oscar at him. I knew those things would come in handy. Ladies and gentlemen, two years ago, Dennis Day left our program, went into the Navy at about the same time another boy was honorably discharged from the Army Air Forces. And we were very fortunate in getting him to pinch hit while Dennis was away. Of course, I'm referring to Larry Stevens. Now that the war is over, Dennis Day will be back with us next week. Larry, I want to thank you for the wonderful job you've done on our show. You were a great asset and I'm sure that our listeners feel the same way I do. Well, thank you, Mr. Benny. It sure has been grand being with

[Howard Da Silva]

you and your whole gang.

[Narrator/Host]

It was grand having you. We'll be hearing you on the air and seeing you soon in the new 20th Century Fox picture Centennial Summer. Good luck, kid. Thank you, Mr. Benny. Through the courtesy of Paramount Pictures and may be soon seen in the picture. Kitty Jack will be back in a minute. But first, here is my good friend Fe Boone, American. Remember, in a cigarette, it's the tobacco that counts. And Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Yes, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Here's what Mr. Roy Lee Daniel of Durham, North Carolina, 32 years and independent tobacco auctioneer said. I've seen Lucky Strike by fine, ripe, quality tobacco. That's Chuck. Full of aroma, mildness and good taste. I've smoked lucky's myself for 15 years. Yes, sir, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So for your own real deep down smoking enjoyment, smoke that smoke of fine tobacco. Lucky Strike, the famous tobacco auctioneers are done. Tonight's programmer, Mr. Fe Boone of Lexington in Kentucky at 49. 49American. And Mr. L A Speedriggs of Goldsboro, North Carolina. This is Basil Risdale speaking for Lucky Strike. LSMFT. LSMFT. LSMft. Yes, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. Thanks, Ray man, very, very much for appearing on program and congratul. We just heard Ray Milan, Jane Wyman and Howard De Silva, the stars of the lost weekend that will do it for this week's show. Thanks so much for joining me. I hope you'll be back next week for the stars of another best picture winner. In the meantime, you can check out down these Mean Streets, my old Time Radio detective podcast. New episodes of that show are out on Sundays. If you like what you're hearing, don't be a stranger. You can rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen. And if you'd like to lend support

[Jane Wyman]

to the show, you can visit buymeacoffee.com

[Narrator/Host]

me sts otr now, good night until

[Jane Wyman]

next week when we'll hear the stars

[Narrator/Host]

of another Best Picture winner, each of them appearing in a tale well calculated. To keep you in suspense, Ladies and gentlemen, the chief hope of our enemies is to divide the United States along racial and religious lines and thereby conquer us. Let's not spread prejudice. A divided America is a weak America. Through our behavior, we encourage the respect of our children and make them better neighbors to all races and religions. Remind them that being good neighbors has helped make our country great and kept her free. Thank you.