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Would you hand me that, please? Thank you. Now, let's see. Survey. Survive. Susanna. Suspect. Ah, here we are. Suspense. Meaning held in doubt, expressing doubt. The state of being uncertain, undecided or insecure. State of anxious expectation or waiting for information such as to keep one in suspense. Therefore delay acquainting him with what he is eager to know. Suspense. Hello and welcome to Stars on Suspense with more Hollywood legends and radio's outstanding theater of thrills. Last week we heard the stars of one of radio's best sitcoms, our Ms. Brooks. And this week we've got the stars of what may be the best comedy of the radio era. One of its best shows, period. The Jack Benny Program. A hilarious blend of sitcom and variety show that surrounded its already very funny star with a sea of standout supporting players. There was Jack Benny, of course, and his radio character of the vain, cheap master of ceremonies, his real life wife Mary Livingston, bandleader Phil Harris, announcer Don Wilson, singer Dennis Day and and Eddie Rochester Anderson playing Benny's butler. Those were the regulars, but the cast of recurring players included Mel Blanc Animation's man of a Thousand Voices, Joseph Kearns, Frank Nelson and even Ronald and Benita Coleman. The show ran on radio over several networks with different sponsors from 1932 until 1955, and a TV version in enjoyed a long run on the small screen. Today we'll hear Jack Benny and four of his radio cast members in radio thrillers, plus a suspense spoof. First up is Joseph Kearns, who played several recurring characters on the show, including Ed, the lonely guard of Jack Benny's subterranean vault. We'll hear him in short order from August 16, now 1945. Then it's Ronald Coleman, who appeared frequently on the show as himself, or at least a version of himself driven crazy by living next door to benny. We'll hear Mr. Coleman in one of my favorite suspense episodes, A Vision of death, from March 8, 1951. Up third is Phil Harris, Benny's bandleader, whose hard drinking, fun loving character spun off into his own show with his wife, actress Alice Fay. The two of them star together in Death on my hands from May 10, 1951. Then it's the man himself, Jack Benny, in A Good and faithful servant, from June 2, 1952. And last but not least is Dennis Day, the show's resident singer whose comedic Persona earned him a radio comedy series of his own. He stars in Like Man, Somebody dig me from August 16, 1959. Then we'll close the episode with a bonus as Jack Benny and his gang present their own version of suspense in an episode from January 6, 1952. Some of radio's funniest performers trade the sillies for suspense and will kick things off with Joseph Kearns right after these messages. Recently, in a big Eastern city, a group of trained men and women called on thousands of housewives and asked this simple question. What kind of container do you prefer for the food you buy? An overwhelming majority of housewives said they prefer to buy food packed in glass. Among them were a great many mothers of small children, and by a ratio of more than eight to one, these mothers said they insisted on prepared baby foods packed in glass. They gave many reasons, as you might expect, but here are the three reasons mentioned most frequently. First, glass lets you see what you buy before you buy it. Second, you can heat, serve and store leftover portions of prepared baby food in the same glass container. And third, these young mothers agreed that sterilized glass containers are cleaner and more sanitary. You can buy an increasing number of the better brands of food packed in glass, and all of the better brands of prepared baby food come to you in Anchor Glass containers sealed with Tampa Proof Anchor vacuum caps, both products of Anchor Hawking this is the cold season. What do medical authorities say about the common cold? Doctors tell us there's no known drug which will cure a cold. There are effective medications for treating complications accompanying or following a cold. If you've been taking sensible precautions and still have one cold after another, it best to see your doctor. And here's another important health tip. When you have a cold and need a laxative, that's the time to rely on gentle xlax Pleasant Tasting Chocolated Ex Lax helps you toward your normal regularity gently overnight. Ex Lax gets along with any cold remedies you may be taking. And Exlax works where nature wants in the lower tract, not the stomach. Taken at bedtime, Ex Lax won't disturb sleep gives you the closest thing to natural action. The next morning you're well on your way toward your normal regularity without upset or discomfort. So when you have a cold and need a laxative, take Ex Lax, the laxative you can use with complete confidence. Ex Lax helps you towards your normal regularity. Gently overnight Ex Lax. And don't forget tomorrow when you ask your grocer for the new Rinso, buy a cake of Lifebuoy. At the same time, Lifebuoy's rich, purifying lather goes right after dirt and perspiration leaves you feeling extra clean. So use Lifebuoy daily in your bath or shower. Remember, it's the only soap especially made to stop be. And now a tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. Now the Roma Wine Company of Fresno, California, presents. Suspense. Tonight, Roma Wines bring you Short Order, a suspense play produced, edited and directed for Roma Wines by William Speer. Suspense Radio's outstanding theater of thrills is presented for your enjoyment by Roma Wines. That's R O M a Roma Wines, those excellent California wines that can add so much pleasantness to the way you live. To your happiness in entertaining guests. To your enjoyment of everyday meals. Yes, right now, a glassful would be very pleasant as Roma Wines bring you Short Order, a remarkable tale of suspense. Thank you very much. Come back. Bailey's Diner. Oh, this is Mr. Bailey speaking. Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. Just a little late on that. Well, I hired a fry cook day before yesterday. I'm sorry. I forgot to tell the newspaper to stop running that ad until this morning. I got a good man. No, no. One man's all I need. Just got a small place here. That's all right. Bye. You see that, Johnson? You better keep on your toes. Plenty of people after your job, you're not careful. You know something. Well, what's the matter? Don't you want to take my money? What? Oh, sure. Yes. Yes, of course. 75 out of 1 5. One. Thank you. Okay. Hey, Johnson. Johnson. Good Lord. Did you see that man's face? Yeah, you're telling me. It's enough to haunt your dreams. Kind of made you nervous, didn't he, Mr. Bailey? Well, after all, it's kind of a shock to look up and see. Yeah. I noticed you hung kind of close to that gun you keep under the gas register. Did I? Automatic reflex, I guess. Oh, poor guy. I ought to be ashamed. Probably got that way in an explosion. Accident or something. Yeah. Looks like a plastic surgery job. Only some doctor like Frankenstein must have done the surgery. Here you are. Enjoy this. Oh, thank you. Come back. Yeah. Yes, sir. He liked your cooking too, Johnson. Two deluxe sandwiches, two coffees. You know, that's not bad, right? Seems to me business has been picking up ever since you started working here. Just thought you'd like to know. Thanks a lot. You like this work, Johnson? Yeah. It'll do the hours kind of get me sometimes. And when the rush hour starts in half an hour, I can't pretend I'll be liking it. But it's all right. Well, someday you'll have a place of your own. Be your own boss. Never get anywhere working for someone else. You know, I'm doing okay now, Mr. Bailey. You'll never go hungry for lack of a job. You're too good a cook. But your own business. Now, you take me. I'm doing well, even if I do say so. People come here to eat, all right. I see that they get them. Makes you feel pretty good having your own place. Makes the saving and scraping seem sort of worthwhile. You seem to get the business. Of course, you got a terrific location. Well, this place has a name that means something. At least, I think it has. As a matter of fact, there was a man in here trying to buy it just last week. That's so. That's right. Real estate agent, name of Sloan. Had a customer. Who's this customer? Oh, I don't know. I told him I didn't want to sell. Oh, here, how about opening that refrigerator door for me, will you? Okay. Thanks. No, I'm not gonna sell. Couldn't afford to. I'm not in a position to retire. Well, things are. It'd be too hard to start up somewhere else. Oh, well, here we go again. Good evening. Evening. Yes, sir? What'll it be? Special. Right. Coffee. Oh, good evening, sir. Is it still chilly out? Oh, yeah, a little. Thought some of your chili would warm me up. Get it? I get it. Chili coming up. Bailey's Place. Oh, Virginia, What's. What. What all the windows? Well, who could possibly. Well, where were you? Well, now, why would anyone want. Oh, no, no. None of those kids would do a thing like that. They're nice kids. Yeah. Hoodlums, I guess. Well, I don't know what you can do. Got no witnesses or anything. You sure was rocks, huh? Well, I guess there's nothing you can do. Well, I. I wish I could too, but I. I gotta stay here. All right. Yes, all right. Goodbye. Bad news, Mr. Bailey. Darnest thing of hoodlums or something. It just broke every window in my house. I. I don't know what to think. Hey, Bailey, this is the new kind of bread you got here. Better than usual. Oh, you like it? Yeah. Well, it costs a little more. Oh, good. E. Good evening. Hello. Good Lord. Yes. Yes, sir. What'll it be? Hamburger and coffee. Right. How do you have the hamburger? Well done. Cream in the coffee? No, black. Yeah, right. Hey. Hey, Bailey, come here a minute. Oh, yes. Pardon me, will you, please? Hey, did you see the face on that fella that came in a minute ago? Yes, I did. It's pretty bad, isn't it? Bad? I'll say. Boy, I can stand a lot of things, but that gets me. Well, I've left half my Meal on my plate. I was enjoying myself until that came in and sat over there. Then I didn't want anything more. That's too bad. Look, don't pay. Don't. No, no, no. It's not your fault. Maybe mine. Gee, how do you suppose he got that way? Oh, a burn, perhaps, or maybe some other kind of accident. I. I wouldn't know. Oh, boy, that's the worst I ever saw. It's too bad, whatever happened. Sure. Well, yes, too bad. Yes, it is. Ketchup. Okay. Here you are. What, this little paper cup? Where's the bottle? Sorry, but ketchup's hard to get. That's all. We can serve anybody. Profiteers. Will there be anything more? No. Okay, your check, and pay at the desk. Thank you. Hey, Mr. Bailey. Yes, Johnson? How's your luck? Sometimes good, sometimes bad. Why? The way I figure, somebody around here is sure gonna need plenty of luck. Why, I don't know. I just got a feeling. If that isn't bad luck for somebody sitting back there at the counter, I'll eat this grill here. And I never saw a recipe for making a steel grill tender. We better order some more pork tomorrow, Mr. Bailey. We're running low. Are we, Johnson? Yeah, a little. They keep hitting our barbecues the way they have so far this year. Evening. I'm sure we'll be needing it. All right. I'll make a note of it. Lucky we got any unspoiled meat left after that guy was in here twice yesterday. I thought the milk and sour. Bingo. Just like that when he looked at it. Yeah, but it didn't. Ah, Johnson, you shouldn't talk like that. He can't help it, you know we can't. We should feel sorry for him, not joke about it like that. Yeah, I'm sorry. Yeah, sure. You got to have sympathy for a guy like that. Just the same, I hate to look at it. I guess we'll have to look at it some more. I think he's coming up to the door now. Good evening. Hello. Yes, sir. What'll it be? Hamburger and coffee. Make the coffee black. Right. Make that hamburger well done. Okay. Oh, good evening. Evening. Yes, sir. What? For you? Why, I'll have. Holy. How's that? Huh? Nothing. Nothing at all. I. In fact, I. I don't think I want anything. I just remembered an appointment. Just forget it. Oh, what do you know? Your hamburger, mister. And your coffee. Ketchup, please. Okay. Still no bottle? No bottle. Sorry. Here you go. Buy an extra bottle. Put it back on the shelf just for me. You gonna Eat here some more. Yeah, I like this place. Go on, take that and see that you get some good ketchup, too. Oh, it ain't that, mister. It ain't the money. You can't buy the stuff when they don't stock it. You better ask Mr. Bailey. Mr. Bailey? Yes, Johnson, you tell him. I just gave your man some money to buy a bottle of ketchup. But he doesn't want to take it. Well, you see, sir, it's not that we can't afford to buy ketchup. No, indeed. We want to please the customer. Something a lot of people seem to have forgotten how to do nowadays. But ketchup's very hard to get just now and we have to ask our customers to bear with us. You keep your money. I like plenty of ketchup. Nothing like ketchup, I always say. There ought to be enough in that paper cup. Won't that do you? Well, not quite. Any chance of a refill? I'm afraid that's all we can allow. Gentleman says he's going to eat here regular. What? I said that? Oh, yes or no? Good evening. Hello there. Could I do something for you? Well, I sort of thought I. Oh, no. No, thanks. No, no. Well, we hadn't finished our discussion. Yeah. As I was saying, Mr. Bailey, looks like we got ourselves a regular customer. Three evenings now that he's been eating here. Johnson and I wish you'd take a look at the figures. Take last night. Ordinarily, there'd be $10 to $20 worth of business. Just between $6 to $6.30 alone. From 6 to 10. How much? $1.35. Yeah, I know. Some of them won't even order. Some of them take a few bites and quit. At least it's not the food. We can be thankful for that. Hey, tell me, Johnson, how can you stand it over there in front of him all the time? Oh, mostly I keep looking someplace else. That's why I took down the mirror. For a while I thought I'd just work along and not look at him. But I couldn't help looking in the mirror every now and then. So I think maybe the customers could stand it better without the glass, too. If they get to the sitting down stage. Yeah, if they do. Well, anyway, I took it down. Might help if he didn't get up every now and then and walk over to the door to look out. People can't help seeing him then. Yeah. Takes him a long time to eat, doesn't it? Yes, it does. Hey, say, I've got An idea. What's that? Look when he comes in. Oh. Evening. Hello. Yes, sir. The usual? Right. Oh, by the way, Mr. What's your name? Yeah, well, as I was saying, neighbor, we. We make a practice here for our special customers. Not just anybody, mind you, but for our special customers of sending meals out. Now, I was thinking, since you've become one of our regular customers, that perhaps you'd appreciate it if I'd send your evening meal over to you every day at your room. How does that strike you? No, thanks. Rather eat here. But we don't have any comfortable chairs. There's no jukebox. No radio. That's okay. Miss him? Anyway, it's not very comfortable. A lot of food odor in the air, you know, sometimes I get sick of it myself. I like it. Not too many people around. Nice place. Suits me. Then you're not interested? That's the idea. Hamburger and coffee. How about. Yeah, the ketchup here it is. Good. Nothing like ketchup, I always say. By the way. Yeah? Look, for me about noon tomorrow. I think I'll be taking lunch with you from now on. Every Day. For Success are bringing you a cast of Hollywood's outstanding radio actors. In short order By John F. Souter Roma Wines presentation tonight in radio's outstanding theater of thrills, Suspense. Between the acts of suspense. This is Ted Meyers. For Roma Wines. Elsa Maxwell is an acknowledged expert on the niceties of dining and entertaining. Recently she said, gracious little touches can do so much to make meals more enjoyable. Dine by subdued light. If possible, adjust radio or phonograph for soft, mellow music and as the crowning touch, serve well chilled Roma California Sauterne. A most excellent idea from Ms. Maxwell. Good Roma Sauternes is pale gold, delightful in bouquet and even more important, exquisite in taste. Created in the Roma tradition, Roma Sauterne is always unvaryingly good. The goodness of luscious grapes selected at peak of flavor richness in sunny California's choicest vineyards. Carefully pressed, then unhurriedly guided to perfection by the ancient wine skill. And of Roma's famed wineries. Good Roma wines are always delicious, yet cost only pennies a glass. Remember, because of uniformly fine quality at reasonable cost, more Americans enjoy Roma than any other wine. R O M A Roma wines. And now, Roma wines. Bring back to our Hollywood soundstage. Joseph Kearns as Bailey. Conrad Binion as his assistant John and Gerald Moore as the stranger. In short order, a play well calculated to keep you in suspense. Johnson. I'm at my wit's end. What are we going to do? I don't know. I. I got no more ideas. Two weeks now and we're losing money every day. I could cook it so I wouldn't want to eat it. You've tried that, haven't you? Yeah, twice. And it didn't work. Yeah, that's right. And I don't know what. We're going. Just a minute, Johnson. Okay, I'll check on the bunse. All right. Hello, Bailey's place? Oh, yeah. Yeah, dear. Oh, no. Well, you must have misplaced it, honey. Every place. Well, how much was in it? Oh, no. Well, what are we going to do for the rest of the week? But I can't, honey. I really can't. Why? About three bucks or something? I don't know. Well, I don't. You know, it's. It's just dropped off during the last week. Oh, no, no, he's fine. Now, don't say that, honey. There's nothing the matter with Johnson. And I'm not going to get a new cook. What? Well, I haven't told you, but. Well, why don't you cut down on a few things once in a while? Oh, Johnson, is there any aspirin back there? Yeah. You want the bottle? Yeah. My head's splitting. Here it is. Oh, thanks. Here he is. Hey, now, look, I got an idea. You back me up. What is it? Well, I'll try it, and if you don't like it, don't say nothing. Hello. Like I say, Mr. Bailey, this kid was a pretty game fighter. He didn't have a thing but a hard left. Mind if I butt in? I'd like to eat you. Bring your lunch with you. What's that? If you brought your lunch. Okay, lay it on the counter and eat it. Be funny, Johnson. Bring me the usual. I got other things to do. What other things? I don't see any other customers. Want me to call the boss? Look, mister, I don't like you. See, I'm tired of seeing you around. You go someplace else and eat. We'll see about that. Hey, Bailey. Yes, sir. What can I do for you? This moron you call a cook says he won't serve me. Yes, well, do something about it. What do you want me to do? Tell him to serve me or else have him fired. Johnson's a good cook. Good cooks are scarce nowadays. What is this? Are you standing up for him? Just told you good cooks are hard to get. What about customers? Well, it's too bad, but it. I see. Look, both of you. I came in here to get something to Eat. And we're gonna get it if I have to sit here all night. Suit yourself. Yes, I'll get it. Bailey's Place. Yes. Yes, dear, I am. What? Wrecked? Where? Were you in it? Were you hurt in front of the house? Oh, I don't know what's happening, Virginia. It just seems every time. Well, I. Of course, I'm glad you were in the house. Well, how bad was it? Almost a complete wreck. Well, could they find out anything from the driver of the other car? Did he have any insurance? They never do, do they? No, I'm all right, dear. Just almost out of my mind, is all. It's getting so I'm afraid to answer the phone. Well, we'll just have to do without a car, that's all. Oh, I'm. I'm sorry, dear. Yeah. Yeah. Well, talk to you later. Bye. Mr. Bailey? Yes. Whoa. What's the matter, Mr. Bailey? Bad news? Oh. Wrecked my car right in front of my own house. Had no insurance, of course. No money to pay for. Oh, that's tough. Yes, sir, that's tough. Him. Him. Look at him. Still sitting there waiting. I have to think of something. Now I can't seem to think at all. I'm stopped too. Boy, you sure get the luck, don't you? What's the matter? I never used to have luck like this. Just. Just lately. Just. Just since he started coming in here. Yeah, could be. Looked like bad news right from the start to me. There he sits. If we could get him out of here once and for all. Hey, wait a minute. You go to the door and see if Ryan's inside. If he is, call him in, will you? All right. I wouldn't. Oh, okay. Right outside. Oh, Ryan, would you come here a minute? Okay. Mr. Bailey wants to see you. What can I do for you, Mr. Bailey? See that man sitting at the counter, Ryan? I want him either arrested or thrown out of here. I don't care which. That's so. Give him you trouble, is he? Hey, you. You talking to me? Nobody else come here. What do you want, Mr. Bailey? What's the charge? Well, he making a nuisance of himself. What's this? All I do is come in here to eat. I'm making a nuisance of myself. I don't get it. Look at him, Ryan. I am. Not very pretty, is he, Officer? The law doesn't give you the right to criticize a man's face. I'm sorry, mister. Hello, Mr. Bailey. Every day he comes in here two or three times. I can't get anybody else to come near the place. While he's here, he stays and stays. He drives most of my business away. I have to eat, same as anybody else. You do anything bad, get tough, insult people, disturb the police, all I do is come in and eat. Look, we reserve the right to refuse service to any customer I don't know. Now, Mr. Bailey, that's all very well, but technically speaking. What do you mean? He means that even if you don't like it, you can't run me out. If I run, mind my own business. It means you can't run me out if I ask you to serve me. Well, how about that? Well, and if I ask for something to eat and offer you money for it, you gotta sell it to me. Oh, no, I don't. Oh, you'd better, or I'll have you in court before you know it. Afraid he's right about that, Mr. Bailey. Well, all right. Sorry I can't help you, Mr. Bailey. Is there anything else? No, no. Be getting on then. Night. Well, how about it? All right, all right, all right. Go sit down. Johnson, get him whatever he wants. Okay. I'm. I'm not going to answer it. I'm not. Mr. Bailey, the phone you. You busted. I don't care. Mr. Bailey, put my gun down. What are you gonna do? You'll see. Now, look here, you. I can be pushed just so far. Now, either you get out of this place and don't come back, or as sure as I'm standing here, I'm going to pull this trigger. Go away. I'm hungry. Did you hear what I said? I hear you. Now go away. Now, look, I'm going to count Three. One. Go away. Two. Three. Coffee, black. I can't believe it. I shot you point blank. Good Lord. Don't forget the ketchup. Yo. Well, you got the lay of the place now, Mr. Tanner. You figure on making any changes? No, no. Bailey had a good thing here that'll leave it just the way it was. We'll hold the trade easier if we do. How did he seem when the deal was closed? I can't say. I let the lawyers handle everything. He took a beating on the deal or. I don't know. You? Not too much. I figure he recovered about 70% of his investment. He was lucky. I felt sorry for him. You didn't talk to him at all, huh? No, no, no. Didn't even see him. You think he'd know you even without the makeup? Maybe. No use taking any chances, huh? Lucky I changed the bullets in that gun for blanks or you'd be a dead pigeon. Yeah. Yeah, I'm glad I foresaw that possibility. You might say I saved your life, huh? You might. Don't worry, Johnson. You'll be taken care of. I'm not worrying. I never had reason to yet, have I? No, but just for your information, Johnson, we haven't committed any crime. We didn't take this place away from Bailey by force. We didn't swindle him. I paid money right on the line for it. Just remember that. Oh, I will. Customer. Why, it's Mr. Bailey. Come right in. Hello, Johnson. Come on, have a seat. Oh, by the way, you know Mr. Tanner, don't you? He bought the place. I never met him. Glad to know you. A pleasure, Mr. Bailey. You know, there's something familiar about you. Maybe I did meet you someplace. I was in once or twice. Looked the place over before I had Sloane talk to you. Oh, that's it. How are you making out? Just getting started. I'm sort of breaking Mr. Tanner in, you might say. Hope you had better luck than I did. I was doing fine until this man started coming in. Johnson knows the man. I mean. Bad looking person. If he ever comes back, you just better close up and go home. That's so. Yes, that's right. Well, it's a wonder I have any mind left. Tell the truth, I'm not even sure I do, Mr. Bailey. Would you let me fix you something while you're in here, huh? Oh, no, thanks. I'm not hungry. We got some good steak. No, thanks, Johnson. Not even steak now. Okay, you're the boss, boss. Not anymore. But I would like to step behind the counter one last time just to sort of look around. Do you mind, Mr. Tanner? Oh, come ahead. Thanks. Well, you haven't changed anything, I see. Not a thing. We intend to operate the same way you did. I think it'll pay. Thanks for the compliment, but I hope you don't draw my luck. How about some coffee, Mr. Bailey? You look tired. Coffee. Well, that sounds like a good idea. I don't mind if I do. Yours is cream and sugar, right? No, no, thanks. Black. This. Say, this coffee is hot. Yeah, I forgot to cut the burner back. And the whole tankful is plenty hot. I have to let it cool. It's too hot for me. Just one last look. Things I won't be seeing for a while, I guess. Buns, butter, pats, coffee, cream. It's funny how you miss things like these. Mustard, ketchup. Ketchup. Where did you get all this ketchup, Johnson? Why are You. I ordered those. Ordered them. Well, so did I. But I never even got a look at a bottle of ketchup. You're lucky all in knowing how, I guess. Yeah, I guess you're right. I rather like it myself, you know. Nothing like ketchup, I always say. What was that? I. I said I'm rather fond of ketchup. Fond of ketchup? Ketchup. I think I know who you are now, Tanner. I think I know who you are. That face. Sure, that face. Makeup, wasn't it? That face. And Johnson had to be in on it with you too, didn't he? Johnson helped you, didn't he, Tanner? He fixed the gun, didn't he? Well, didn't he, Tanner? Bailey, wait a minute. I can explain. Ah, you admit it. I'm telling the truth. Isn't that so, Tanner? Isn't that so? Hey, Bailey, stop. Pull him off, Tanner. I'll get a cop. Please, Ryan, help. Please. Coffee. You always take it black man. Quick, Mr. Tanner. Good Lord. The coffee. His face. And then. What is this? It's all right, Ryan. There's nothing wrong, Ryan. Nothing really wrong. That's not his real face, Ryan. He likes it that way. Don't let him fool you. What else do you want? Oh, yes. Ketchup. Plenty of ketchup. Nothing like ketchup, I always say. Nothing like ketchup. Roma Wines have brought you short order with Joseph Kearns, Conrad Binion and Gerald Moore as stars of tonight's study in suspense. Suspense is produced, edited and directed by William Speer. This is Ted Myers with a word for Roma Wines, the sponsor of suspense. During the warm weather, nothing tastes quite so good as a tall, frosty Roma Wine and soda. And as Elsa Maxwell recently remarked, serving Roma Wine and Soda is smart 1945 style hospitality. You'll find this delightful iced drink as refreshing as it is delicious. Yes, and Roma Wine and Soda is so easy to prepare. Half fill tall glasses with Roma, California Burgundy or Sauterne. Add ice cubes and a bit of sugar. And for a decorative touch, garnish with cherries or fruit. And for a delightful apparatus sip, delicious Roma sweet Vermouth, well chilled, zestful, full flavored Roma vermouth, both sweet and dry, is blended and developed with all the traditional winemaking skill of Roma wineries is made and bottled in the heart of California's famous vineyards. Yet surprisingly low priced. Try Roma Vermouth soon, won't you? Next Thursday you will hear Dane Clark as star of Suspense radio's outstanding Theater of thrill. Presented by Roma Wines. R O M A made in California for enjoyment throughout the world. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Autolite and its 96,000 dealers present suspense. Night. Auto Light brings you a story of a mind reader who discovers his nightclub act is not a fake. A story we call A Vision of Death starring Mr. Ronald Coleman. Before our play begins, here is a word about Autolyte from a good friend of ours. Greetings. I will Cox. Why, it's that amazing, magnificent, mystic and great glass globe gazer, Sabu the swami. What's on my mind? You think of your best friend. Everybody's best friend. The auto lights stay full, the battery that needs water only three times a year in normal car use. Now the glass shows exist glass even more powerful than mine. Well, that's the fiberglass retaining mat protecting every positive plate in the Autolite Stay full battery. They prevent shedding and flaking and give the stay full longer life as proved by tests conducted according to accepted life cycle standards. Now I see many smiling faces on the thousands of drivers who visit their masterful, merry and marvelous neighborhood Autolite battery dealers for an Autolite stay full, the battery that needs water only three times a year in normal car use. Now the crystal ball shows words of wisdom. I know you're always right with Autolyte. And now with a vision of death and the performance of Mr. Ronald Coleman, autolite hopes once again to keep you in suspense. If I speak too rapidly for your stenographer, you'll tell me, won't you, Lieutenant? No offense, but he impresses me as someone who has to sit on the floor to put his shoes on. And don't hesitate to stop me if I seem to wander away from the point. I mean to say, this is my first and I hope, final appearance in a police precinct and I should hate to give a sloppy performance. We were always known, Aurora and I, for the smoothness and gem like precision of our act. And as for this murder rap, I suppose it's called, is concerned an acquaintance with our act is the essential rabbit. Awfully good act. Smart, informal, occasionally humorous and always mystifying. Well, the act always began with music. Never with the cliche fanfare of trumpets or roll of drums. I would saunter out to the center of the floor and say something like, good evening. You are about to witness an exhibition of mental telepathy. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce Aurora, my wife. They never failed to give her a hand. What would they applaud? Why, the vision she presented as she came toward me. There's never been anyone as lovely as Aurora, the most beautiful flash in the profession. Aurora, would you care to tell the audience or shall I? You tell them, Judd. While I tie the blindfold across my eyes. Ladies and gentlemen, all mind readers employ a gimmick. A gimmick is a trick, a device. For example, when the mind reader, threading his way through the audience, says to the mind reader sitting blindfolded on the stage, a lady has given me a small object which I now hold in my hand. What is it? And the mind reader, sitting blindfolded replies, a silver coin. The answer has not come through mind reading. No, it has come through the gimmick. A cue or signal communicated through the very question itself. But we don't do that. We do not. You will notice, ladies and gentlemen, that I never speak to or Aurora at all. Are you ready, Rory? Ready, Judd. Here we go. Then. You, sir. You have something good. Concentrate upon it like a good chap. The gentleman holds a. In his hand it is a Mexican peso bearing the date 1892. Oh, that's. That's very clever of you, madam. I've been surprised if she gets this one the lady holds. How about you, young man? Her other hand. A sucker once born remains a sucker till death. The audience never realized, never in all the years we worked, that although I was not speaking to Aurora directly, my chatter nevertheless was loaded with. With signals and cues for her guidance. By revealing the gimmick, we concealed the gimmick. And that, Lieutenant, is the neat plus ultra of gimmicks. Yes, it was as crude as that. But it enabled us to work 50 weeks a year here and abroad at an average of over a thousand a week. Of course, I always gave some credit for our success to our agent, Harry Arnold. Although Rory was inclined to give him no credit at all. Good news, Judd. I've managed to book the act into the College Inn in Chicago with a four week guarantee. Not bad, huh? Get him. He managed to book the act. I suppose they never heard of us in Chicago. I suppose we weren't held over there six weeks when we played the Sans Souci in 1948. You think it's easy to get a four week guarantee these days? Money is short, money is tight. I've never yet heard you say money is long. Money is loose. You have to sweat for your 10%, don't you? Yes, you do. In a pig's ear you do. Agents, they're all like, oh, there's gratitude for you. There's the milk of human memory. What were you when I first saw you? Nothing. Not this much. Playing 10 a day on the canvas in Menasha, Wisconsin. And paid off in bottle tops. I worked, I schemed, I sweated. Listen to him. You'd think he had to get out there on the floor every night. You'd think he was the one spent 11 months, 12 hours a day memorizing the code. You'd think it was his name in lights. Agents, all they know is how to live off a dead whale. Scum of the earth. Look, I'm not gonna take that from you. You hear me? You'll take it, baby. Along with the 10%. You'll take it and you'll chew it and you'll swallow it. And you' it down too. How do you like that? I'm warning you, kid, don't push me too far. Don't push me. Children. Children. On your way, Harry. And don't let it get you down. I think a four week guarantee is pretty good. Oh, thanks, Judd. If it wasn't for you, Judd, I. Oh, why go into it? I'm going for a walk. But it's. Aside from these altercations between Rory and Harry, it was smooth sailing. We wore the best ate the best drank the best ate at the finest hotels. And every Saturday night after the performance, Harry would bring us our salary. He'd bring it in cash. Thousand, twelve, fifty, fifteen hundred. I have the old performer's distrust of checks being given too many with a high latex content. Anyway, life couldn't have been more placid. And then one evening, about five weeks ago, soon after we opened at the Grove here in town, a frightening thing occurred. We'd just begun the act and I was out in the audience. You will notice, ladies and gentlemen, that I never speak to Aurora at all. Are you ready, Rory? Ready, Jan. Here we go then. Now you, madam. The lady holds in her hand a compact. It is platinum and bears her initials, R.C. you. You, sir. You, sir. The gentleman is holding an engagement ring. In it are three small diamonds. I. I miss. Miss. Have you. The young lady is holding. It's a small cameo brooch. Can. Rory. Rory. Maurice. Maurice. Music. Music. I picked Rory up from the floor and hurried with her to our dressing room, almost beside myself with anxiety. I placed her on the couch, dampened a towel and put it on her forehead and began to chafe her wrists. Rory. Rory, Honey. Rory. John. What happened? I was in the bar. Do you want me to get a doctor? No, no, no, I don't. Get out. Leave us alone. Get out. Harry. Get out. John. I'm here. Rory. Are you all right? I guess so. I don't know what happened. You fainted away. Try to remember what happened. I felt funny. I don't remember. No, no. Try. Try, Rory. Try. Try to remember. It's important. I can't. Why is it important? Oh, you don't know, Rory. You don't know. You were calling out the answers before I even had a chance to give you the cue. Do you believe in telepathy, Lieutenant? I don't mean the sort of thing Rory and I usually did. I mean real telepathy. I never did either, until that night. I don't mind telling you, I was badly shaken. I mean, after all, I knew we'd been using a gimmick. And suddenly it began to happen without the gimmick. Scared us to death. We didn't know what we were getting into. But we went on with the act. And in my mind I began to search about for the answer. I found it. Of course, you'll find a gimmick in almost everything if you look hard enough. I've got it, Rory. We've worked together so long that you know what I'm going to say before I say it. From my inflection, my pauses, even my movements. You see, Judd, that has to be it. Oh, this is marvelous. When Harry gets back, I'll tell him about it. And if I last until tomorrow, he can ask the management for more dough. Yeah, as soon as he gets back next Thursday. Tonight. How much more should we ask for? What we've. Tonight? What made you say tonight? I don't know, Judd. Oh, you were there when he told me he'd be in Palm Springs till Thursday. What? What made you say tonight? I don't know. What difference does it make? Stop picking on me. So I made a mistake. So what? I don't see how you could make such a mistake. That's all. Judd. Leave me alone. I've been worried, half crazy about really being able to read your mind. I've been under a strain. So Harry's coming back Thursday and not tonight. All right. You satisfied? He'll be here Thursday and not tonight. You Judson Stone, Mr. Distressing. Room A. What is it? A telegram. Sign here. Oh, sign for it, will you, Rory? There you are, kid. I'm sorry I blew up in your face. Judd, I. Judd, what's the matter? It's. It's from Harry. He's coming in tonight. And he did too, Lieutenant. Rory was so upset by it, she couldn't go on at all that evening. She had no explanation for how she Knew none whatsoever. I don't know, Judd. I just don't know. My mind seems to go blank, and I seem to hear a voice whisper in my ear, harry, Arnold will be with you tonight. That's all. When we got to our suite at the hotel, Harry was there waiting for us. What happened? What happened? You both look like ghosts. Harry, I'll tell you some other time. Leave us alone, will you? All right, all right. I'm going. Just came back to wish you a happy birthday. And to give you this birthday. Oh, yeah. Thanks. Thanks, Harry. Thanks. What is it? Well, open it, why don't you? It's a bathrobe. A red silk bathrobe with your initials. That's right. It's a. How does she know? How do you know? Get out of here. Get out of here. Judd, make him get out of here. Look, I won't be talked to like that. I don't care who she is. I won't be talking. Shut up. For heaven's sake, shut up and go away. Leave us alone. What? Go. Get out. Get out. You. You too, Judd. She's got you talking against me, too. All right, I'm going. I'm going. But from here on in, it's strictly business between us. I wash my hands. He kept his word, Lieutenant. From that time on, he kept himself to himself. And I was prepared to let it go at that, much as I liked Harry. Until the night I was awakened by Rory moaning in her sleep. No, please. Rory. Rory, wake up. You're having a bad dream. Rory, no. What? What? Jed? Shh. It's all right. I'm here. I'm here. What? Rory? The voice whispering again. Yes. Oh, John. What? He's going to kill me. Harry Arnold is going to kill me. And that, Lieutenant, was the beginning of the end of that. Autolite is bringing you Mr. Ronald Coleman with Kathy Lewis in a vision of death. Tonight's production in radio's outstanding theater of thrills. Suspend. Rory. Rory, get a grip on yourself. He's going to kill me. Harry is going to kill me. Don't be ridiculous. Stop it now. It was just a bad dream. Harry is going to kill me. Will you stop that? Will you stop saying that? Don't hold me frightened. Harry is going to kill me. Now you've had a bad dream. I tell you, he hates me. He hates me. John. John, Harry is going to kill. I'm a rational man, Lieutenant. I've always felt, for example, that when Hamlet says, there are stranger things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio. Horatio ought to reply. Tell that to Sweeney. I knew there was no such thing as mental telepathy. I knew it as well as I know I'm sitting here talking to you up here in my head. I knew it. And yet the next afternoon I found myself entering a gun shop and purchasing a revolver and a box of bullets. Determined that before Harry Arnold could so much as injure one hair of Rory's head, I would kill him. I should have gone directly to the police first. You're using hindsight, Lieutenant. I had all that out with Rory. Please, Judd, please. Go to the police and tell them about this. Let them handle it. Tell them what? That by reading his mind, we've learned Harry intends to murder you. They'll believe us. They've got to believe us. They're reasoning like a child. They'll decide that it's either a publicity stunt or else they were both lunatics. If I tell him about the telegram and the birthday presents. Rory, we have no proof. But we have to do something. What? Tell me what? You know he intends to kill you. I know he intends to kill you, but what can we do? I can't simply put a bullet in his heart next time I see him. How could I explain it? My wife had a premonition that he was going to murder her. Do you know when he's going to do it or how he's going to do it? No, he hasn't decided yet. Isn't there anything we can do? Nothing. Except wait. I reacted to the waiting as you might expect, Lieutenant. Sleeplessness, loss of appetite, growing irritability. I flared up at everyone. Waiters, chambermaids, elevator boys, the manager of the club. The manager of the club? Yes. He finally said to me, stone, what the devil's gotten into you? I'd really like to know. None of your business. I'm only trying to be nice. Boy, shut up and let me alone. Yeah, sure. I'll let you alone. I'd let you alone right now if your contract didn't have another week to run. But after that, I'll let you strictly alone. You'll never work this club again. Maniac. I began to drink quite heavily, quite noticeably. I was going crazy just from the waiting. And then? And then the waiting came to an end. It was around three in the morning. I was sitting up in bed in the dark, smoking, when Rory opened her eyes and said, Judd. Yes. The voice. Yes. He's. He's going to kill me. Here. Right here in this room. Rory. Saturday. This Saturday. At midnight. Rory. Rory, sweetheart. He's going to shoot me. He has a gun and he's going to shoot me. He's going to get you downstairs in the manager's office at the club. While you're there, he's going to come up here. Rory. Rory, listen to me. I want you to listen to me. You're mistaken. Do you understand? You've been having another bad dream and that's all there is to it. Oh, no, Jed, I swear it. He just thought of it. Just this minute, he's standing in a bar. Standing there all by himself, drinking. He's just this minute decided you're making it up. Yeah. No, it's the bar over at the Tuscany Hotel. I see it so clearly. You're wrong. You're wrong. I'll prove you wrong. Dad, give me the bar of the Tuscany, will you? Over on Sunset. One moment, please. You'll see, Rory. He's not there at all. You'll see. It's just a dream. Just a bad dream. Tuscany Cocktail lounge. Hello. Is Harry Arnold there at the bar? Harry Arnold? No, I'm sorry. He's not. He's not. You sure of that? Oh, sure, I'm sure. He was here all evening. Left about a minute ago. I said good night to him myself. You want me to call? It wasn't a dream. No, no, no, no, Rory, don't. Don't. Don't worry. Trust me. Trust me. When Harry comes tomorrow night, you won't be here at all. But I will. Look, Lieutenant, my hands. See? Just the memory of how I felt at that moment, and my hands begin to tremble again. Amazing, isn't it? Well, that was last Thursday night, or rather Friday morning. And towards daybreak, Rory subbed herself to sleep. But I was restless. I got dressed and went downstairs and got into my car. A long drive has always relaxed me, but when I got behind the wheel, I don't know what it was, possibly the fresh air. But all at once I felt as though I couldn't keep my eyes open for another moment. I simply. I simply had to have sleep. So I crawled into the back seat, curled myself up in one corner, pulled the rug over me and went out like a light. Hello, satin skin. Hello, Harry. I was awakened around noon by the sound of voices. May see us. Look businesslike. Where is he? I don't know. Since he hasn't got the car, he must be out walking. Don't you have some papers or something I could be examining just to make it look good? A pocket full here. He fall for it last night just like he fell for all the rest of it. Red bathrobe, the plants in the audience. He even phoned the bar just after you left. Timed it beautifully. Oh, satin skin, satin skin. I can hardly keep away from you. After tomorrow night, we'll have all the time in the world for each other. Harry. You bought the whole story, huh? Midnight tomorrow, your place. Every word of it. Just do what you have to do. Remember to come to the dressing room before the eight o' clock show. And tell him you've set up a meeting with Stamper, the manager, in his office at 12. I want them to shake hands and be friends again. I'll tell him. Don't forget, when you come to the door at midnight, keep talking to the elevator boy. Don't let him go. Whatever you do, you'll want him to testify with self defense. Don't worry. I won't forget a thing. You'll handle all the rest of it. Just leave it to me. No, I mean about his gun. That's pretty important, you know. Don't worry. It will misfire. It'd be difficult for me to tell you what I felt as they walked away, Lieutenant. One part of me felt the way a man ought to feel, I suppose, when he learns that the woman he loves is not only unfaithful but plotting his death as well. But another part of me felt only relief. Relief at learning there was a gimmick in this, too. They'd been fairly clever for amateurs. Harry had a good excuse for carrying a gun to protect the cash he brought me each Saturday. My own behavior in recent weeks would lend weight to what he would probably ask, offer in his defense that I must have been crazy. For no reason at all, I pointed a revolver at him and threatened his life. But he had a shoot in self defense. The presence of the elevator boy. That could mean only that Harry would shoot just as soon as I opened the door. I'd be found dead with a revolver in my hand and a heartbroken agent at my side. Tableau. Then I found myself hoping, as I never hoped before, that they'd come to their senses before Saturday. That they'd realized what a vicious, inhuman thing it was they were planning. But just before the 8 o' clock show that night, there was a knock at the door of our dressing room. Come in, Judd. I've been talking to Stamper, the manager. He's sorry there's bad blood between you. Wants to square it. I told him you'd be in his office at 12 to talk things over. All right with you? Yeah. We don't want it so that we never work here again, do we? I mean, there's no reason we should. No reason at all. Button my dress, Judd. See you later, Judd. Yeah, later. We did the show and then went up to our suites. I helped Rory pack a small overnight bag. I loaded the revolver. And then there was nothing to do but wait. The minutes passed. Nine o'. Clock. 10, 10:30. And I waited. Judd. Yes? I don't want you to go. It's best that you do. Doesn't seem right to leave you here alone. Things might not go as I planned. I might not be able to stop him. And if I fail to stop him. No, no, it's best that you go. Just wait at the motel until you hear from me. What time is it? Almost 11. Two minutes of 11. I'm out of cigarettes. Desk. This is Mr. Stone in 1101, please. Send up a carton of players, will you? Right away, Mr. Stone. I want you to go now, Rory. Judd, let me call the police, please. It will be useless. We've gone into it and it'll be useless. Then come with me. He won't find anybody here. Then he'd choose another place, another time. Here's your valise. You have your gun? In my pocket. You won't take any chances. I don't know what I'd do if you were hurt, or any. I won't take any chances. Let me help you on with your coat. Judd. I love you so. Yes, I know. And I love you, Rory. I really do, you know. Ready? Yes. 11 o'. Clock. He'll be here in an hour. Go now, Rory. Kiss me goodbye. Judd. The cigarettes. Get them, will you, darling? While I find change. Harry. Rory. Rory. Rory. I shall always remember the look on Harry's face, Lieutenant, as she sank to the floor. They'd concocted a bad dream between them and it had come true. I'll bet he still doesn't know how it happened. And if you pass his cell, Lieutenant, you might tell him. Whisper the word gimmick into his ear. That's what I said, Gimmick. I gimmicked the clock while Rory was dressing. Set it back a full hour. It was 11 to her, but 12 to him. I adore gimmick, don't you? Suspense. Presented by autolite. Tonight's star, Mr. Ronald Coleman. My occult powers do reveal that every driver's automobile has a life both long and bright. When it has parts by auto light. Well, that's fortune telling. There's no doubt about Swami. You know Autolyte makes over 400 fine products for cars, trucks, planes and boats in 28 plants from coast to coast. These include complete ignition systems used as original factory equipment on many leading makes of our finest cars. Generators, coils, distributors, electric windshield wipers, voltage regulators, wire and cables, starting motors and many more. They're all engineered to fit together perfectly, work together perfectly. Because they're all part of the Autolite team. So, friends, don't accept electrical parts supposed to be as good. Ask for and insist on Autolight original factory parts at your neighborhood service station, car dealer, garage or repair shop. Remember, you're always right with Autolight. Next week on Suspense. Our star will be Mr. Van Johnson in Strange for a Killer. And in weeks to come, you will hear such famous stars as Ms. Joan Crawford, Mr. Jack Carson and Mr. Jack Benny, all on suspense. Suspense is produced and directed by Elliot Lewis. With music composed by Lucian Morowek and conducted by Lud Bleskin. In. In tonight's play, Kathy Lewis was heard as Aurora and Larry Dobkin as Harry. Others in the cast were Florida Edwards, Joseph Kearns and Charles Calvert. A Vision of Death was written by Jerry Hausner and adapted for suspense by Walter Newman. Ronald Coleman may be heard each week on his own radio program, the Halls of Ivy. And remember, next week on suspense. Mr. Van Johnson, as a man who suspects a murderer. Is holding us hostages, his wife and child. A story we call Strange for a Killer. You can buy world famous Autolite staple batteries, Autolyte resistor type spark plugs. Or standard type spark plugs. Autolite electrical parts at your neighborhood Autolite dealers. Switch to Autolyte. Good night. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Autolite and its 96,000 dealers present suspense. Tonight, Autolyte brings you the story of an accidental death and an attempted escape. Death on My Hands, Starring Phil Harris and Alice Fay. Hi, Harlow. Well, flood my carburetor. If it isn't Oscar the orating auto. What's up, my hood, Harlow? It's been nearly 5,000 miles since my last spark plug check. And you're set for a session with your Autolite spark plug dealer, eh, Oscar? His exclusive new plug check indicator will quickly show the condition of your spark plugs and whether they're right for your style of driving. I'm not up to par, Harlow. I've lost my usual pep on the hills and I'm using too much gasoline. Well, if the plug check indicator shows your spark plugs need cleaning or adjustments. Your Autolite spark plug dealer has all the equipment to do the job right. And if My plugs are worn out, Harlow. Then he'll replace the worn out spark plugs with ignition engineered auto light resistor type or standard type spark plugs to give you smoother performance, quick starts and gas savings. So, friends, have your spark plugs checked regularly. And when you do see your neighborhood auto light spark plug dealer. And remember, you're always right with Autolyte. And now with Death on my Hands and the performances of Alice Fay and Phil Harris, Autolyte hopes once again to keep you in suspense, I won't mention the name of the town. It won't help any. I don't think I'll even tell you what part of the country it's in. It's just a place in a long valley with hundred year old elms and hills you can't stop looking at. And the people. Well, maybe they're not much different than anybody else. 2,500 of them. The kids went to schools with big lawns and long walks. And the men walked up Oak street from the mills right after the 5 o' clock whistle. Some stopped for a beer at Mike's or the Green Rooster or Eddie's Tavern. And some went right on home. Sounds wonderfully ordinary, doesn't it? That's what I thought until they tried to hang me. Dixie. Dixie. Dixie. I can't believe it hits me all right. I saw you from across the street. Well, what in the world are you doing in this little town, Julia? Oh, just getting a little rest. Don't give me that. Your idea of rest was always to sit in an air conditioned cocktail lounge. Gee, you look good. Well, what about you? I wish you'd have stayed with a van, Julia. I just felt like drifting. Dixie, where did you drift? All over. Ended up with a carnival, a car. I saw the posters about you and the band playing for the high school dance tonight. I couldn't believe it. Well, you don't get young doing one nighters. But you see a lot of country and some swell people. You, for example. Well, how are all the boys? Well, I'm the only one of the original bunch left. No. Yeah. Sugar Thompson went with Kenton. Bill Candoli joined the circus in Cleveland. Married a snake charmer. Oh, no. Yeah, and then Squeak handily loused himself up with the law in Virginia. You know how it goes. I got all new sidemen now. Just kids. Yeah, things change, don't they? Yeah, they do. Hey, look, Julia, why don't you drop in at the dance? They'd think I was an old science teacher. Nah, you'll knock em Dead. No, no. Look, Dixie, I wanna talk to you. I'm at the embassy across from the railroad station, the only hotel in town. I'll see you after the dance outside. And we'll have a sandwich and a drink and a talk, huh? Okay, that's the way you want it. Look, it's the high school auditorium, you know. Uh huh. Well, I'll see you, Dixie. Yeah. Who's singing in my place now? Me. We walked opposite directions and caught each other looking back a couple of times. She looked good. But then she always had. There had never been anything wrong with how Julia looked that night at the high school dance. I played like I hadn't played for weeks. Man, that band caught fire. You should have seen the faces of those kids dancing by the bandstand. They looked at me as if I invented music. And me, a third rate clarinet player. Trouble was as far from my mind as Carnegie hall is from Bop City. It was backstage after the dance that the bubble blew up in my face. Here's the loot, boss. Look at it. Big coarse notes. Yeah. What does it come to, Teddy? Well, a cashier says 1200 round simoleons, but I'd count it myself. That's not bad for this town. Listen, it's a lot better than standing on vine street waiting for a recording date. I'll take this kind of loot any day in a week. I better put this in my bag. Hey, that bag must be loaded by now. I got two weeks take in there, but I'll drop it in the bank when we get to Kansas City. Are you still carrying that gun for protection? Yeah, Ted, right here. I wouldn't know how to use it though. Loaded every chamber. See, those things give me the creeps. Hey, what else you got in that bag? Just some publicity pictures of me. I'm gonna get some new ones though. Get em while you're young. When they start camouflaging those age lines in your face, the cost goes up by leaps and bounds. Yeah, no, I know, Teddy. Tell the boys I'll be at the next stop tomorrow. Oh, who'd you tie up with, Julian? She here? Well, I'll be done. Small world, huh? What's she doing now? I'll tell you tomorrow. We got about six years talking to do in eight hours. Now get on out of here, huh? Yeah, right boss. Come in, come in. I'll be in with you in a minute, Julia. I just want my. My name isn't Julia. It's Emily. Oh, hello, Emily. Hello. What can I do for you? Well, they all Dared me to come in and tell you how much we like your music. Well, bless you. So you liked it, huh? Never had such a good band at our dance before. It was like having Benny Goodman. Well, now, aren't you sweet? I'll tell Benny when I see him. Do you have a picture I could have? Well, I don't have any real good ones, but, hey, I'll tell you what. You give me your name and address, and I'll send you one autographed with love. To Emily, my prettiest fan. I can see some in that suitcase. No, those aren't any good. They're kind of old. I mean, I just got to get one. They dared me. All right, but don't pull that suitcase. Kid, look out. Kid. Kid, what did you do? She fell to the floor and her head suddenly spurted red. For a moment I was so shocked, I. I didn't know what to do. Then I bent over and I picked her up and I ran to find the nearest. I ran almost four blocks with people staring at me like I was crazy. I couldn't even feel myself. I was just a thought. Get to a doctor. Get to a doctor. And I finally did. She died instantly. No doctor in the world could help her from then on. It was a nightmare. There's only four policemen in town and they were all handling highway traffic 30 miles away because of a big mill fire. I told the doctor and the people who crowded around me that I'd stay in town and face a police inquest. The next morning. There was some grumbles and some nasty words, but nobody stopped me from checking in at the Embassy Hotel. But I was there only an hour when I realized I wasn't going to get off that easily. A group of men formed outside the hotel and stood looking up at my window. Then all of a sudden, I realized they wanted to lynch me. Listen, now, listen. Down there, I know you're there. You don't need no rocks through no windows. You don't need any lousy notes. I know why you're there. How long are your weight, Dixie? The tired the rope's going to be. You never go to use a rope on me. Never. Do you understand? Never. Who is it? Who is it? Julia? What do you want? Who are you doing? All the shouting at them. Those people down there. If you can call them people. They threw a note through the window on a rock. They want me for killing that girl. Maybe I can help you. What can you do? Don't kick a friendship in the face, Dixie. You never know when It'll come in handy. Yeah, tell me all about it. Look at them down there watching the window. Like hound dogs with a treed possum. Oh, Dixie, why don't you think of something to do instead of just burning off steam? Think. In the past hour, I've thought more than a Greek philosopher did in a lifetime. But it all boils down to me ending up with a tag on my toe. I wish I could help you. Look, what are you hanging around me for? They might try to do something to you if they find out you've been nice to me. I'll take my chances. I got nothing else to do. Oh, thanks. Don't waste your time. I don't think it's gonna pay off. You know what? They make me feel like a criminal. They found my car. They did? Yeah. Somebody told the manager. What's his Name? Abdo Cars 3 miles north of here in an empty riverbed burned to a crisp. The only thing in the world I own. Ah, Dixie, don't let it get you. But how much do they want? Julia, an accident is an accident. That means it wasn't done on purpose. She grabbed the bag and the gun went off. And she would. She would. Just a little kid. Dixie. Dixie, stop it. You're not doing yourself any good this way. It could happen to anyone. To me or the people next door. Or even to one of them down there. Come on, sweetheart, and sit down here with me. Wait a minute. What is it, Dixie? More of them. And they got guns now, not just clubs and ropes. Guns. Get away from that window. Maybe I don't want to. Maybe I could get them to shoot me from here. And then, well, it'd be over with. Like that. Get back from that window. Come on. Let go of me. They wouldn't shoot. They want their fun later. Do what I say. You gotta think, Dixie. You gotta think of some way to get out of here. Sorry that girl got killed. Sorry as an honest man can be. But there's no point in dying to prove it. I think God understands. Dixie. Dixie, it's just another rock. No, it isn't. Look. What? Oh, never mind. Dixie, it's what you said. Wait a minute. Now. It's something else. What is it? Don't hide it from me. Give it to me. Oh, shoot. One of her shoes. What are they gonna throw up next? Her body? Dixie, let me take it. Let them keep it. You dirty Janie. Oh, Dixie. Dixie, if there was only something we could do. Harrison, when people get like that, there just isn't. I'm not gonna let this happen. I'm not gonna. Julia, listen. They're breaking the door down. They're coming in. We've gotta get out of here somehow. Get out? There's no way to get out now. Now go back to your room, Julie. I won't. I said go on. Too late, Dixie. They're coming down the hall. Autolite is bringing you Phil Harris and Alice Fay in Death on My Hands. Tonight's production in radio's outstanding theater of thrill. Suspense. Yippee. Why the loud levity, my loquacious limousine? I just visited my neighborhood auto light spark plug dealer, Harlow. Did he check your spark plugs with the nimble nemesis of nefarious spark plugs. The Autolite plug check indicator. Yes, sir, Harlow. And it showed that my plugs were not functioning properly. So he replaced those worn out spark plugs with the matchless magic manifested by the multiple magnificence of ignition engineered Autolite spark plugs. Hey, Oscar. Right. And now I'm giving smoother performance, quick starts and gas savings. Well, it pays to see your neighborhood auto light spark plug dealer. He carries ignition engineered auto Light spark plugs. The world famous spark plugs that are designed by the same engineers who design complete ignition systems for many leading makes of our finest car. And I'm off for a spring fling. So long. So, friends, see your neighborhood Autolite spark plug dealer soon. And have him replace worn out spark plugs with ignition engineered Autolite resistor type or standard type spark plugs. Remember, you're always right with Autolight. And now, Auto Light brings back to our Hollywood soundstage. Alice Fay and Phil Harris in Elliot Lewis's production of Death on My Hands. A tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. Quiet, Julia. Don't make any noise. It only sounds like one person. One person can carry a gun. Couldn't be them, Dixie. They wouldn't knock. Who is it? Abdo. Hotel owner. Let me. All right, What's on your mind? They broke in the door downstairs. I stopped them in the lobby. They had ropes and guns. Thank you, Abdo. Don't thank me. I told them that they couldn't come in after you, but that you would go out. You don't mean that. I told them within 15 minutes. Abdul, let me stay a little longer. In the name of humanity. Till. Till. Till I can dope this out. I got enough money. I don't worry about money. Well, what have you got to lose? Listen, I gave you a break. They could have come in here and got you and torn you up little pieces. But I Said no one little word. How long after you are gone? I have to live in this town. You've got your troubles, I've got mine. That's the way things work. What's the matter with this town? Why does it act the way it does? After what you did, you expect them to treat you with brotherly love? You gotta be born here before they think you're human. There's a lot of world outside this flea bitten town, and most of it's better. They should be happy that someone brings a little of it in with them once in a while. What you brought in was tragedy. But it was an accident. A statistic. The kind of thing insurance companies make a fortune predicting. Don't blame me. Blame that big wheel of chance. Dixie. I just didn't get the right number on this spin, that's all. Well, you got now 13 minutes to to think of another. What can I do for you, Dixie? Tell me something. Just let me alone. Well, I'm gonna do something anyway. Did you turn on the radio? I turned on the radio. Turn it off. I'm not going to turn it off. I'm not going to. What do you want music for? Cause I want to dance. Are you crazy? Aw, come on, Dixie, dance with me. Come on. It used to take your mind off things. Oh, I know, but I. Come on. Come on. That's it. Oh, pull me closer, Dixie. Oh, I wish this hadn't happened so I could enjoy you, Junior. Let's. Let's just pretend this is the future and we're dancing somewhere in love. And how can I think like that when all I can see are those guys down there loading buckshot and guns? Just Dixie, Dixie, just dance. But I can still think. Oh, honey, this is wonderful. You know, I've played for a lot of dances and I never realized until now what it does to you inside. What does it do to you, Dixie? Makes me wish I'd have gone to high school. I never got there. That was early autumn done by the Woody Herman aggregate. A band that plays the blues. Not that you're blue right now. And this is Charlie Schaefer, your early evening platter party host on Knok. And I want to remind you that if you have any request whatsoever, just dial Knok. The switchboards are waiting. Now, how about a little bit of Glenn Miller in the mood? How do you like that? I can request any tune in the world, but I can't save my life. What a great place to live. Let's dance some more. Yeah, yeah. What should I request? Don't break the news to Mother. Or maybe I'm in the mood for life. Oh, Dixie, don't talk like that. Dixie. Give me the railroad station freight division. Dixie, what are you doing? Stop talking. Hello. Hello? What time does the next freight train leave? Yeah, I, I I have some valuable freight I want to put on board. Oh, an hour, huh? Are you sure? The time? Exactly one hour. Well, I I guess there wouldn't be time tonight. Thanks anyway, Dixie. You just couldn't get to that train. It's my only chance. But I need an hour. An hour of sir safety to get to it. I'll be right back. Where you going? To find a policeman. Or to talk to those men or to do something. The police are all over in another town. They couldn't get here in town. You just wait here. I'll be right back. Emily, if if anybody caught me on my knees like this talking, I suppose they'd think I was crazy. But I'm not. Emily, you know it was an accident, pure and simple. It wasn't my fault. Only nobody really believes it. They're waiting for me outside your people. And they want me in exchange for you. Only it isn't an exchange. It's it's just blood. Revenge. An eye for an eye. And it doesn't make sense. I know that saying all this will never do you any good. But, Emily, I just wanted you to hear how sorry I am. How deeply and tragically sorry I am. Emily, have a good long rest. Maybe someday I'll meet you in person again. We'll talk about. And that someday might be today. Hey, what are you doing down in the lobby, young lady? Where are you going? Mr. Abdo, we've just got to do something. Get some police or get rid of those men out there. I have long ago sent somebody for the police. But I don't expect him to get here. Why don't you let him stay here longer? Because I can only hold this man a while. After that, they come in. I don't want to see it. Why do these men want him? I don't want to talk anymore. Well, I'm gonna find out. Where are you going, lady? I want to ask you why you want Dixie. That ought to be plain. He didn't kill that girl. It wasn't his fault. You must have a better reason. Whose little girl was it? Yours or yours? Whose? Is that why you want him? Because it was one of your children? Lady, you'd better go on about your business and leave ours to us. We got our own reasons for getting that Skunk. What'd you find out? Julia, what happened? Abdo's been trying to get the police. They won't come. Don't worry. How many of their neighbors do you think they'll shoot down to save me? I don't know, Dixie. I don't know. Look, I got five minutes, that's all. Five minutes to walk out of here, and I need an hour. I'm sure the ringleader of that gang would. I talked with him. I'm sure he's the father. Oh, what's the. I give up. But you can't, Dixie. You can. What do you expect me to do? Perform a miracle? Get out. Dog. Let me in. Are you. Are you ready to go, son? No, I'm not ready to go. I still got five minutes. You must have made a mistake with the time. Your time is up. It is like. Look at this watch. Look at it. Still better than four minutes. I'm sorry, but now is the time before they come in the hotel after you. I don't get it. I don't get this whole setup. Why did you bother to stop them once if you send me out to them now? I did what I felt I must do. For me, that was enough. Well, I'm not going. You understand? I'm not going. He'll have to work to get me. Haven't you done enough to me already? To you? The little girl you who was killed was my little girl. Oh, Mr. Abdo, I'm. I'm really sorry. I'll go. You won't have any more trouble from me. I'm going with you. Dixie had to turn off the lights in the lobby at the Bite. Shall we take the elevator? No, honey, the stairs. I want to make it last as long as I can. Dixie not see. I want to cry. Why? But it wouldn't help. I'm having trouble enough seeing now. I'll go out with you and fight. Let me. Dixon, you're gonna stay right here in this lobby. You said you'd do anything for me, and that's what I want you to do. How are you gonna do it? I'm going out. Turn right alongside the building. And then I'm gonna run. Run. You hear me? Then maybe, somewhere, somehow, I can find help. So long, Julia. Dixie, I love you. Good. Take it easy, Holden. Stay right where you are. Why should I? Shut up. If you know what's good for you. Walk over to that car. Make it fast. Take that gun out of my face. What I tell you? Stop talking. There he is. All right, everyone stay where you are. Hey, what do you think you're trying to do? I said stay where you are. I'll put a bullet through the face of the first man who moves. Are you gonna let a guy get away with a crime like that? Maybe kill him, Whatever or not. Come on, guys. The next one will go through somebody's head. I want you to notice this badge on my coat. You people pay me to protect you and everybody against lawlessness in this town. And I'm going to earn my money whether you want me to or not. Some more police will be here in two minutes and anybody standing around will be arrested. Now go on home. Break this up. All the fun is over. Can you drive? Thank you, Officer. I said, can you drive? Well, I could yesterday, but I don't know now. My knees. I'll try. I got to be ready for anything. Where do I go? The jail. That's all right, my sir. You'll be safe there. Hello. Hello, Julia, would you care to go and get that sandwich we talked about a thousand years ago? Oh, I'd love to. Dixie. What did they say? The Coroner acquitted me 10 minutes ago. Accidental homicide. Oh, that's wonderful. Well, what are you gonna do now, Dixie? Oh, just catch up with the band and drift, I guess. Dixie, I. I don't suppose I could go back with the band. Well, just singing, that's all. You could do a bigger job than that if you want to. You mean it? Sure. Look, here's your wedding ring. You know, I never threw it away. Suspense Presented by Autolight tonight stars Phil Harris and Alice Fay. Friends, this is Harlow Wilcox again to remind you that Autolight is the world's largest independent manufacturer of automotive electrical equipment. AutoLight makes over 400 products for cars, trucks, tractors, planes and boats in 28 plants from coast to coast. These products include world famous ignition engineered Autolite spark plugs which are carried by your neighborhood Autolite spark plug dealer. See him soon and have worn out spark plugs replaced with ignition engineered auto light resistor type or standard type spark plugs for smoother performance, quick starts and gas savings. And remember, you're always right with Autolight. Next week on Suspense, our star will be Mr. Charles Boyer in Another Man's Poison. And in weeks to come, you will hear such famous stars as Jeff Chandler and Dick Powell on suspense. Suspense is produced and directed by Elliot Lewis with music composed by Lucian Morowek and conducted by Lud Bluskin. Death on My Hands was written for suspense by John Michael Hayes and E. Jack Newman. Included in tonight's cast were Joseph Kearns, Herb Butterfield, Barbara Whiting, Byron Kane, Franklin Parker and Gil Strat Jr. Alice Fay and Phil Harris may be heard on their own radio program every Sunday over another network. And remember, next week on suspense, Mr. Charles Boyer. In a tale we call Another Man's Poison. You can buy world famous Autolite resistor or standard type spark plugs, Autolite staple batteries, Autolyte electrical parts at your neighborhood Autolite dealers. Switch to Autolite. Good night. We want to thank the National Safety Council for choosing Autolite for the Council's Public interest award of 1950. This award is presented in recognition of exceptional service to safety. Autolite is proud to have been chosen as one of the leaders in this important field and pledges continued efforts toward accident prevention on the highway. This is cbs, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Autolite and its 98,000 dealers bring you Mr. Jack Benny in tonight's presentation of suspense. Tonight, Autolife presents a story about a man who worked for 30 years to prepare a most unique personal retirement plan. The story is called A Good and faithful servant. Our star, Mr. Jack Benny. Hello there, Harlow. Well, the legislative luminary. How are you, Senator? My car is giving me trouble, Harlow. Your car? What's wrong with it, Senator? Well, it gets going slower than a loser leaving office. It rides rougher than a tax debate and uses more gas than a three day filibuster. Well, it may be spark plug trouble, Senator. Spark plugs should be checked every three to four thousand miles. So see your nearest Auto light Spark plus plug dealer. His exclusive Auto light plug check indicator will quickly show the exact condition of your spark plugs. If they're worn out or wrong for your style of driving, he'll recommend resistor or standard type ignition engineered auto light spark plugs for smoother performance, quick starts and gas savings. Sounds like a propitious proposal, Harlow. How do I find this auto light spark plug dealer? Why, just phone Western Union by number and ask for operator 25. She'll quickly tell you the name of your nearest auto light spark plug dealer where you can get the finest spark plug service money can buy. And remember, from bumper to tail light, you're always right with Auto Light. And now with the performance of Mr. Jack Benny, autolight presents transcribed a good and faithful servant. Hoping once again to keep you in suspense. I know you've been through a lot, Mr. Fenton, but if you could just try to recall anything else about the appearance of the tomb. Lieutenant, couldn't this wait? Fenton has spent 14 horrible hours locked in a vault. And while I admire his Spirit and pluck and bearing up as well as he has. I'm just trying to get something to go on, Mr. Waterman. Do you want your money back or don't you? The welfare of my employees comes first, Lieutenant. First, last and always. And you're insured, Ms. Fenton? Don't answer if you don't feel up to it, Fenton. I don't mind, Mr. Waterman. I'm anxious to cooperate. Now, as near as I can remember. Make sure you get this, Florence. As near as I can remember. Of course, I had only a flash before they forced me into the ball. Yeah, we understand, Mr. Fenton. I had the impression of one being tall but not too tall, and the other one was shorter. But not too short. Exactly. And they were wearing masks. Rubber masks. One had a Lionel Barrymore mask, and I think the other was Dick Tracy. It was quite a shock to see him. Aha. The Brinks gang, Lieutenant. The Brinks gang to A T, maybe. Mr. Cartwright, would you come over here, please? Mr. Cartwright, is it the practice to keep large sums of cash on hand overnight at the store? Well, yes. The store does a tremendous cat cash business, Lieutenant. Tremendous. And yesterday was Dollar Day. Thank you. Mr. Cartwright, how does it happen that Fenton was alone in the cash room when the bandits entered? Did he customarily close the vault for the night? Not customarily, no. When I'm unavoidably called away from the store. Well, does this happen often? Well, very seldom, Lieutenant, very seldom. But it happened yesterday. Two men walked in, put you in the vault, walked out with a big hunk of money at precisely 5. 5:56. Mr. Cartwright opened the vault this morning at 8:02. Correct, Lieutenant. We won't know how much they got until I can make an audit. And if there's any question, Lieutenant, of corroborating Fenton's story, I need only to say that he's been with Waterman's for 30 years. A good and faithful servant. More exactly, Mr. Waterman. 29 years, 11 months and 29 days. I was due to retire tomorrow before this unfortunate circumstance arose. Nonsense, Fenton. You retire tomorrow. And if there's any question, Lieutenant, of Fenton's character, his honesty, his divorce. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. You can go home, Mr. Fenton. Better get some rest. If you want to duck the reporters, go out this back way. Well, what do you think, Mr. Waterman? Entirely up to you, my boy. Entirely. But in these days of doubt, of confusion and dishonesty in high places, I believe your simple story of courage and devotion to duty will be an INSULT. INSPIRATION EVERYWHERE Mr. Waterman, I am ready to face the press. They were all very nice to me. The reporters, the police, Mr. Cartwright, and especially Mr. Waterman. All that money missing 50,000. Yet his only concern was for me. I thought that if I could afford it, I'd like to buy him some. Some little token of gratitude. Then I thought again. In my desk at the office there was a secret compartment. And in that compartment was $50,000. I guess I could afford it. Yoohoo, Mother, I'm home. Good morning, Harold. I hope you haven't had breakfast. I've kept it hot for you. You're not going to ask me how it went, Mother? Oh, I heard over the radio. But I wish there'd been some way of doing it, that it wouldn't have kept you out all night. Oh, I wasn't out all night, Mother. I was in a vault. I know you were, Harold. And if you keep on, you're going to end up with that same sinus strip your father used to have. Oh, Mother, it was a perfectly dry, warm. Oh, never mind. Eat your cereal, Harold. You'll feel better. Mr. Waterman told me to take the day off, Mother. I'm not going in until tomorrow. That's certainly big of him after all you've done for them. How much did you get? 50,000. It's in my desk at the office, in the drawer with the false bottom. In your desk? Will it be safe there, Harold? Well, no one will be looking for it. Harold, you don't think you'll have any trouble getting the money out of your desk? I think things will work out all right. See, according to my plan, Harold. You see, I told you from the beginning you weren't strong enough for this type of thing. The next morning at 8:43, I punched in at the store, figuring 308 working days a year. That made 9,000, 240 punches. It was a little strange to think of this being my last. I walked through the store to the elevator, past lingerie ladies gloves and perfume, the way I always went. But this morning was different. People looked up when I passed. They spoke to me. They knew who I was. Even the brunette in perfume smiled at me. I almost stopped, but I couldn't think of anything to say. In the elevator, one of the girls asked me how I felt. Still scared, I said, and they laughed. They wouldn't have laughed any harder for Mr. Waterman. I got out at eight my floor, and as I went into my office, Ms. Prentice, Mr. Cartwright's secretary, looked at me. 23 months and two days, she'd been looking at the top of the of my head. But this morning, she looked at me and she smiled. I guess I smiled back. Good morning, Mr. Fenton. Good morning, Ms. Prentice. It wasn't much, but I felt it could have been a start. I was almost sorry this was my last day. Fenton. Fenton, did you hear me? Yes, Mr. Cartwright. I heard you, Mr. Cartwright. All right. A big workload piled up yesterday when you took off, and we haven't anyone new coming. Not that I want to overload you on your last day. An honest day's work for an honest day's pay, Mr. Cartwright. Oh, good. I'm still trying to find out how much was taken in the holdup, so you're on your own. I think I can tell you almost to the penny, Mr. Cartwright. I'll make my own check. Now, about the work, I. Oh, good morning, Mr. Waterman. I was just. Well, Fenton, back at the old Esk, eh? I just didn't feel right away from it, Mr. Waterman. Hey, I got a surprise for you this afternoon, Fenton. Going to make a little ceremony out of your retirement. A. A ceremony good for store morale, right, cartwright? Oh, absolutely, Mr. Waterman, absolutely. And about that request of yours you made last week, Fenton, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if we can swing it. Oh, you're too kind, Mr. Waterman. Oh, my boy, when you work for Waterman's 30 years, you've got some something coming to you. No, really. I ate my usual lunch that day. The Thursday blue plate special at Elmo's Grotto. 70 cents, plus the usual 10% tip, 7 cents with the usual 20 minutes left in my lunch hour. I headed for the park with a nickel bag of peanuts. The squirrels were going to miss me. No, no, Mr. Waterman. You've had three already. Give Mr. Cartwright a chance. Sit up, Mr. Cartwright. Sit. That's it. That's it. Excuse me. Would you mind if I join you, Mr. Fenton? Why, Miss Prentice, of course. I mean, of course not. Sit down. Sit down. Thank you. Move over, Mr. Waterman. He does look a little pompous, doesn't he? Which one is Mr. Cartwright? There, with the small mustache. He bites. And is there a Miss Prentice? Well, there is, but I believe she is, well, nesting. Well, how long have you been feeding them, Mr. Fenton? They seem so friendly. 30 years, Miss Prentice. My favorite animal. You give a squirrel a nut and does he eat it? No, he runs away and stores it in the hole. We could all benefit from their example. And now that you've stored your little Nest egg. You're retiring, Mr. Fenton? Well, you might say that, yes. You're quite a fascinating character, Mr. Benton. Me? I'm. I'm sorry I didn't know you sooner. You know, the whole store is talking about your ordeal and that vault. Oh, it wasn't so bad. In fact, I've always rather liked the vault. What an odd thing to say. Well, chekon et so goo, Ms. Prentice. That's French for each to his own taste. Oh, you've been abroad, Mr. Fenton? Me? Oh, my goodness, no. Oh, but you will now that you're retiring. No, no. I've got my eye on a little cottage by a lake and woods. Lots of squirrels there and no time clocks. You and your wife. Mother. Oh, I hope you get it, Mr. Fenton. Thank you, Ms. Prentice. I wonder what the robbers are going to do with all that money. I wonder. Five to one. Shall we go back and punch in Miss Prentice? She let me walk all the way back to the store with her. And in the elevator, Mr. Bixler Sporting Goods winked at me funny. For 10 years I'd had the feeling Mr. Bixler didn't like me. There was quite a gathering in the cashier's office when we arrived. All the executives from Mr. Waterman's down and the editor of the store paper wandering through. Waterman. I'd sent an item to him last summer. Mr. Fenton of cashier department, spending his two week vacation at home. But he never printed it. Come in. Come in, Fenton. We've been waiting for our, shall we say, a guest of honor. Me, Mr. Waterman. You, Fenton. We have a little ceremony which I hope to conclude before the lunch hour was over. Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Waterman, of it. This is your day, Fenton. Your day. Oh, going to get a shot of the two of us wool? Yes, sir. Mr. Waterman, over by the door. Oh, if you don't mind, I'd like it sitting at my desk. I feel more, well, secure there by your desk. How's this? Got it? Good, good. And now, Fenton, we all say farewell to a good and faithful servant. One who was given 30 years of his life as a contribution, however small, to making Waterman's the great institution it is today. Well done, Harold Fenton. Thank you. A modest man, but conscientious. His regular comings and goings past almost unknown to many until his ordeal of two days ago. Locked all night in the vault by brutal and rapacious thieves. A night in which, in his own words, he relived each and every day of his 30 year service. To Waterman's greater devotion hath no man was nothing really. And now his labor's done, his burden borne, Fenton will live up the rest of his days in ease and comfort because he has arrived at the retirement age of the Waterman pension plan, by which he will receive $31.68 a month. $31.68 a month for as long as he lives. Thank you. And now, a little surprise for Harold Fenton. A week ago, in a letter to me, our good and faithful servant asked that on his retirement he be given permission to purchase for his home his old desk. Actually, Mr. Waterman, I. I don't know what I'd do without it. Oh, Frankly, I put in a lot of thought on this simple request. I weighed the factors in my mind. On the one hand was Fenton's 30 year service. On the other, Mr. Waterman. On the other, he was already receiving his pension of. Well, his pension. However. Please, Mr. Waterman. However. Fenton, my boy, I decided to go you one better. One better? Not a new desk. Nothing so unsentimental, Fenton. Instead of allowing you to purchase the desk, I'm giving it to you. Phew. All right, boys, right in here. Take the desk wherever Fenton here wants it. Now, back to work, everybody. Month end clearance today. Whoops. Easy, man. Don't drop it. Easy. And in, my boy, in the years ahead, when you're seated at your old desk, think of us, won't you? I certainly will, Mr. Waterman. I certainly will. Will. Auto Light is bringing you Mr. Jack Benny in a good and faithful servant. Tonight's presentation in radio's outstanding theater of thrills suspense. Well, Senator, did you take my advice? Why, yes, Harlow. My Autolite spark plug dealer turned my worn spark plugs out of office and elected a set of ignition engineered Auto Light spark plugs. A wise move, Senator. Those Autolite spark plugs are designed by the same Autolite engineers who design the coil distributed generator and all the other important parts of the complete ignition system. Used as original equipment on many leading makes of our finest cars, trucks and tractors, they're world famous for quality and performance. And my Auto Light spark plug dealer nominated Auto light resistor spark plugs for my car. Harlow, you're on top now, Senator, because Autolite resistor spark plugs represent one of the greatest advantages advancements in spark plugs for automotive use in the past 20 years. They offer proven advantages such as double life gas savings and smoother performance. And they're specified as original equipment on many leading makes of our finest cars. What's more, The Auto Light resistor spark plug is just one of a complete line of ignition engineered Autolite spark plugs for every use. So, fellow citizens, be sure vote for Auto Light. Right, Senator. Friends, take a tip from me and see your nearest Auto Light spark plug dealer this week. And remember, from bumper to tail light, you're always right with Auto Light. And now, Autolite brings back to our Hollywood soundstage, Mr. Jack Benny in Elliot Lewis's production of A Good and Faithful Servant, a tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. Retirement agreed with me. A walk to the park to see my friends when I felt like it. Leisurely lunch at Elmo's Grotto when I felt like it. And when the need arose, a little gardening. Mother and I were very happy. You've done enough for one morning, Harold. Your back will go out again. All through, Mother. Just cleaning off the spades. What were you planting this morning, Harold? Mother, if anything should happen to me, knock wood. Knock wood. Right in between the beets and the radishes, there's a very rich patch of dirt. Son, aren't we going to get our little cottage by the lake? I have to go in town today, Mother. I might just inquire around. Oh, good. You know, Mr. Waterman is really a very sweet man. The Waterman pension plan. I just wish I could tell him how happy it's made me. I hadn't told Mother, but Miss. Mrs. Prentice had called that morning. Mr. Cartwright wanted to see me that afternoon at the office, she said, and she asked how I was, what would have happened if I'd asked her to lunch. I almost did, too. In the cashier's office at the store. Ms. Prentice smiled when she saw me, and I smiled back. In fact, he struck up quite a conversation. Oh, Mr. Fenton, how are you? Fine, just fine, Ms. Prenders. Retirement agree with you? Yes. Yes, indeed. Fine. You notice we haven't filled your old job? No. Oh, yes. Yes, indeed. Haven't been able to find another man of your type. Well, well. That you found. Come on in here. Coming, coming, Mr. Cartwright. Sit down, Fenton. Sit down. Thank you. Just trying to clean up accounts on the robbery. Fenton, what was your final tally again? 50,000. Almost exactly. Mr. Cartwright, you're way off. That doesn't check with my audit at all. I'm quite sure of my figures. Well, then you're wrong, that's all. My check shows they got away with 82,000. 82,000? Right. Now, if you'll just sign the necessary statements corroborating my order. I can't do that. Mr. Cartwright. And just why can't you? Don't you take my word for it? Frankly, no, Fenton. Look, you're retired. It's nothing to you one way or the other. You just made a little mistake in your figures, that's all. Mr. Cartwright, are you asking me to help cover up a shortage in your accounts? All right, fence, Fenton. I'll lay it on the line temporarily. I'm a bit short involvement with a woman, and you wouldn't understand. I most certainly wouldn't. Look, I'll make it worth your while. Shortages are found out Sooner or later, Mr. Cartwright. All right, if that's your attitude. Let me tell you something, Fenton. I don't like the smell of this robbery of yours. I don't like it at all. What do you think of that? You're implying that I made off with $50,000 belonging to watermans? I think it's highly possible. And how are you so sure it was 50,000? Supposing me for one instant capable of such a thing? Mr. Cartwright, wouldn't I be much too clever to put my head in a noose by covering up for you? Fenton, if I was talking to an honest man, wouldn't he have taken my story right to Mr. Waterman? Hmm? I'll give you five minutes. Either sign my audit, or I go to the police and accuse you of stealing. 80. Think it over, Finn. No question about it, Mr. Cartwright. Dishonesty might be a bit awkward for me. My instinct about the man had been thoroughly sound. I had disliked him for 16 years. Well, there was only one safe way out of it. Well, Mr. Cartwright, if you need money. Yes? Why don't you rob the vault? Actually, it isn't hard at all. Well, how did you. How do I get away with the money? I'm sorry, I never reveal professional secrets. Well, then you'll have to help me, Fenton. Lock me in the vault and you get away with the money. Me? Sure. Then we're both in the clear for good. Help me out, Fenton. You mean I'm going to clear out the vault a second time? You'll never regret it. Regret it? The fact is, I. I'd rather enjoy it. We settled on the following Friday. Friday nights the store stayed open till nine. And they were having a big white sale that day. The money was already stacked on Mr. Cartwright's desk when I got there. The Juicy Hall. I didn't see Mr. Cartwright around, but. Hello, Mr. Fenton. Ms. Prentice. But. But the money. I. I was listening when you and Mr. Cartwright made your plans, Mr. Fenton. And he caught Me and forced me to help him. You understand, Harold. I mean, Mr. Fenton. Harold, times like these draw people together quickly, don't you think? Oh, I do. I really do, Ms. Prentiss. Helen. Thank you, Helen. Ms. Prentice, Mr. Cartwright mentioned a woman in his life. You're not the one, Harold. Of course not. Excuse me. I just thought. You remember the office party last Christmas? Oh, that. Well, that was just because he was under the mistletoe. And if you'd been under it instead of Mr. Cartwell. Really well. Oh, Fenton, you're here. Good. Anybody see you come up? It doesn't matter, really, Mr. Cartwright. Might even be better that way. Then you and Ms. Prentiss can say that I left minutes before the bandits arrived. You're right, of course, Harold. Thank you. Are you ready, Mr. Cartwright? I brought some wrapping paper for the money. Even brought along a handle with care sticker. That's the Fenton touch, you know. Get on with it, will ya? No need to be nervous. There. Neat. I spent eight years in rapping and mailing. All right. You know what to do with it, Helen. I know. Just a minute, Mr. Cartwright. I'm to take the money, remember? There's been a change, Fenton. We rewrote the script. You think that's wise to fly in the face of my experience? Now, look, Fenton, we're not children. You lock us in a vault and take off with the money, you think we'd ever see you again? Well, you're questioning my honesty. I'm sure Ms. Prentice will vouch for me. We're rather good friends, Ms. Prentice. Helen. Unfortunately for you, Fenton, Helen's on my side. Now, if you wouldn't mind getting into the vault. Me? Me in the vault? But this is a loaded gun, Fenton. Get in the vault. But you came back for a second helping, that's all. The Confederate got away with the money, but I courageously slammed the vault door on you and went for help. But will they believe me? I imagine they'll find 50,000 somewhere around your house. They'll believe me, Helen. I see. I'm sorry, Harold. It's a nasty trick. But we're nasty people. You should have stuck to squirrels. Just one thing, Fenton. How did you ever get that 50,000 out of here the first time? How? Well, I didn't, Mr. Cartwright. You didn't? Then where is it? It's still in the vault. I don't believe it. Oh, it's quite cleverly hidden. It took me most of that night. I was locked in. Get in there and show me. I'm sorry, Mr. Cartwright, get in there. No. I went through a lot for that money, Mr. Cartwright. 30 years. I just assumed you shot me. Helen, hold the gun on him. I'm going in and look. Well, don't be long. What if somebody should walk in? I'll be able to see if he's lying. Just watch him. You see anything? Not yet. I don't think it's possible. Open the door so I can get some more lights. Must be true. Crime changes people. I had never lied. Yet I lied to Cartwright. I never used violence. Yet I got behind Helen and I. I guess I'll go home. Mother will be wondering what's happened to me. Some more cereal, Harold? I don't think so, Mother. Thanks. What time is it? 8:10, son. They would have opened the vault at 8 this morning. The police should be here any minute. Are you sure those two will implicate you, Harold? It seems likely, Mother. The gun would be hard to explain. And I think Ms. Prentice will turn on Mr. Cartwright. After a night in the vault. Yes, she's just the type. I'm sorry, Mother. I guess I just don't know much about women. It's all right, son. You think they'll be hard on you? Not very. I haven't spent any of the money. The insurance companies always look kindly on such cases. There they are, harold. How long? Two years, Mother. Maybe less. Maybe even one. It's still a long time. A long time after 30 years in Waterman's? Hardly. I'll get the door. Suspense presented by autolite Tonight's star, Mr. Jack Benny. This is Harlow Wilcox speaking for Autolite, world's largest independent manufacturer of automotive electrical equipment. Autolite is proud to serve the greatest names in the industry. They are members of the Autolite family, as are the 98,000 autolite distributors and dealers in the United States and thousands more in Canada and throughout the world. Our family also includes the nearly 30,000 men and women in 28 great autolyte plants, from Ghost to Co coast and in still other Autolite plants in many foreign countries, as well as the 18,000 people who have invested a portion of their savings in Autolite. Every Autolite product is backed by constant research and precision built to the highest standards of quality and performance. So remember, from bumper to tail light, you're always right with Autolight. Next week, a story of revenge. The desperate effort of a murderer to destroy the man who had committed him to prison. The story is called Concerto for Killer and Eyewitnesses. Our star, the Director of Suspense, Mr. Elliot Lewis. That's next Week on South Spencer. Suspense is produced and directed by Elliot Lewis. With music composed by Lucian Morowic and conducted by Lud Gluskin. A good and faithful Servant was written for suspense by Richard M. Powell. Portions of this program were transcribed. In tonight's cast, Norma Varden was heard as Mrs. Fenton, Doris Singleton as Helen, Gerald Moore as Mr. Cartwright, Joseph Kearns as Mr. Waterman, High Ever as Lt. Miller, and Charles Calvert as Mr. Wolf. For the location of your nearest auto light spark plug or auto light battery dealer. Or your nearest authorized auto light service station. Phone Western Union by number and ask for operator 25. Switch to auto light. Good night. This is the CBS Radio Network. Suspense and the producer of CBS Radio's outstanding theater of thrills, the master of mystery and adventure, William N. Robeson. They call themselves the Beat Generation. By which they do not mean defeated, they mean beatific, which is to say blissful. They're cool, man. They're way out there. They dig jazz, which has no melody. And poetry, which makes no sense. At least to the rest of us squares. They're kids seeking an answer. And to the Beat Generation, the answer seems to be found in inaction, in non feeling. They couldn't care less. But facing beat, Cat with reality, Face him with murder. And what happened? Listen. Listen. Then, as Dennis Day stars in Like Man, Somebody Dig Me. Which follows in just a moment. Like Man, Somebody dig Me, starring Mr. Dennis Day. A tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. Man, like crazy, Man, I dig everything. I dig Zen and underarm deodorant. I dig Elvis Presley and Sputniks. I even dig people that drive right on by when I'm hitchhiking. People call me the Tennis Shoe because I wear them. Because I'm always on the move. But mostly cause I'm cool. Man. I could stand out here in the middle of this desert all day. And you know something? It wouldn't bother me. You want to lift? Hey, I'm with you, Chick. How far are you going? I just stick with Route 66, man. Onto the ocean. We're on our way to Las Vegas. You going to California? Like, I wrote a poem, man. I want to read it to the Pacific Ocean. The Pacific Ocean? Well, I already read it to the Atlantic. Well, if you read it to the Atlantic, why bother to read it to the Pacific, man? Have you ever read a poem to the Atlantic in January? Well, no, I. Oh, man, we almost didn't stop for you. You know, most people won't take a chance on hitchhikers these days. Yeah, you're Lucky we picked you up. And look, man, I don't know what you want, but I ain't got it. I got no rose to pin on you, no medals, dig? I just stand by the road with my thumb up if you want to pick me up. Ooh. If you want to drive on by, too cool. If you want to stop the car and let me out, that's okay with me because, man, I'm cool. I just don't care. You're the driver and I'm just along for the ride, you dig? I'm just making conversation. Uh huh. If you're going to Vegas, man, you'll have to turn off at Kingman. I don't dig Vegas. Vegas is the squares right now I'm gonna get some shut eye. Oh, I'm tired, man. The cops run me out of town last night for building the fire to keep warm. Well, I'm tired, man. You mean just for building a fire? Like, how was I to know all that wood was somebody's house? I pulled down the lids of my eyes and make like I was asleep. But it was all I could do to keep from busting out laughing. It was kicks, man. These squares were real kicks. Walter, turn on the radio. Okay. Walter. I don't like that man. Oh, Mary, don't. He your voice down. You want to wake him up. He thinks he's crazy. And I think he's dangerous. Honey, he's perfectly harmless. I see his type on the road a lot lately. Kind of a fad. They call themselves the Beat Generation. Pretend that nothing matters to them anymore. They just grit. He's harmless. Was this the same I wish we had Wetine Melodies to bring you another bulletin on the killer who's been terrorizing southern Nevada. The Hatchet Maniac's fourth victim was just found brutally murdered in the small Nevada town of Searchlight, not far from the Arizona border. Only one eyewitness is seen. The killer. She described him as being medium height, dark coloring, wearing a red nylon jacket and tennis shoes. Use your head. You're in Arizona. But the description fits. And he could be carrying anything in that bag of. You want to look in a bag? Like I thought you were asleep. Don't jump. Stay cool. I'll put it in the front seat and you can look. See? Man, it don't even zip a shut. So what do you dig inside? A bottle of wine from the supermarket? Typewritten copies of my poems? A clean shirt with a dirty collar? Man, I travel so light, I don't even dig toothbrushes. So what am I going to do with a hatchet. Man? There's one thing about squares they never ever learned. This is Kingman. Buddy. What? Do you want to get out anywhere? We've got to get some gas soon. Oh, that's strange. The streets are almost deserted with that maniac running loose. Everybody's probably locked up indoors. Shouldn't we have turned off by now? We're just about out of town. Yeah. Oh, wait a minute. Here's a place. See? Pots, food and gas. Look, why don't we pull in here and ask and get some gas at the same time? I don't see anybody. Like, maybe they're closed. Lights are still on. I'll go inside. Leave me, Walter. There's nothing to be afraid of. Well, I'm certainly not going to stay out here alone. Why, thanks, Jake. Walter, like, who was I to stay in the car when the party's inside? Just as we go through the front door, some cat hustles into the kitchen, wiping his hands on his apron. Oh, there you are. I didn't hear you drive up. Holden, you got blood on your head. Mary, please don't be lying. Tomorrow's special's chicken and dumplings. Somebody has to kill the chickens. That's why I didn't hear you drive up. Oh, we need some gas. Yeah, man, like gasoline, man. Like right away. I got eyes to see this cat. Ain't nobody's popular, and he ain't never run no gas station before. What do you think I'm gonna tell these squares? I drop my bag at the end of the counter and then I walk around to the back of the station and scrub some of the dirt off my face. It takes me quite a while to scrub. But I come back around the station just in time to see the two squares drive off down the road. And what do you think happens? Instead of turning right to go to Vegas, they turn to the left. When I come in the cafe, I surprise this cat behind the counter. Hey, hey, man, you walk up on people, like, too quiet. That's why they call me the tennis shoe. Like you hip. They call me the cat. I can tell why. Hey, where'd those two squares go? Mexico. Mexico? They said they were going to Vegas. Yeah, I know. They asked me where to turn. I told them they drive long enough, they'll wind up in Mexico. I leave the cat and I'm walking west. I'm 66 with my thumb ready, 10, maybe 15 minutes at the most, when the squad car with the flashing light screams up to a stop. Right away, they pull out those big shiny pistols. And right away, I know what they're thinking. This is really gonna be crazy. Hold your hands in the air, man, like all way. Hold him up high if you don't want your head blown off. That's better. Just search him, George. Easy, man. I laugh when people do that. I'm not. He's clean. What do you got in the bag? I got goodies for Grandma. You good, Grandma? Step away from it. See what's in the bag, George. Okay, I got. What is it? We've got him. I got. Who, man? This is a hatchet killer, Charlie. I look over to see what's in the bag and I almost flipped. There, on top of the clean shirt with a dirty collar, on top of all that cool poetry, on top of an almost full half bottle of wine, there's this hatchet I've never seen before. Man, like, I'd laugh, but the hatchet is all blood. Now, look, buddy, you'd better give us your name and give it to us fast. I told you, man, I'm the tennis shoe. I don't like your flip attitude. Oh, flip, man, flip. I don't know whether you realize it or not, but you're in bad trouble. You've been caught with a murder weapon and no identification and no alibi. I told you my story, but you don't dig it. You expect me to believe that you've just been passing through this gate? Don't forget that Bronson cat in Gallup, New Mexico. He's all the alibi I need. I was swinging at a party at his place last night. All night. He digs me so I'm not shook. This is a new kick, Daddy O. I ain't never been up for my him before. Oh, too cool. Kingman Sheriff's office. Yeah, he's here. Gallup Police. Hello? You got him there with you? Put him on. Will you shut up so I can hear? Hello, Mr. Branson, this is the Kingman Sheriff's office. We got a man here that's says you know him. Was at a party at your place last night. Calls himself the Tennis Shoe. What? Just a minute. Said you never heard of you. Here, let me talk to him. Hello, man. Yeah, man. Hey, this is me, the tennis shoe and you like I know. Well, tell the man I would, but I keep forget. Hey, Bronson, look, this is for real. They're trying to pin a murder on me. Crazy, man. You way out there. Way out. Murder. What kicks. Like, man, Won't somebody dig me? Now, do you want to tell me why, you're children. Yeah, but I didn't. You were carrying a hatchet that killed five people. How did it get in your bag? The cat must have put it there. Who's that? I told you already. You know the guy that was at Pop's place. Who else saw him beside you? I told you, they're two squares. What? Give me the lift. The man and woman you sent in the wrong direction. I didn't send him in the wrong direction. The cat did. He's cool. He did it for a kick. You kill the old man for a kick? Oh, no, I'm innocent. It's all a collection of circumstances. I'm just a victim of the world, man. Take them down and book them for first degree murder. What's going on out there? Almost everybody in town's out front. They're yelling for the Hatchet Killer. You aren't gonna let him in here, chief, huh? Yeah. If they make up their mind, they're coming in. It's gonna take more than me to stop them. Well, you can't let them get me. Don't pay any pensions on them, Daddy O. I'm going to go out there and try and talk them out of it. But. Yeah, all right, all right, all right. Give me a chance to speak my mind. Quiet down. Quiet down. Quiet. We're all friends and neighbors. I know how you all felt about Pop Daniels. He was a friend of mine, too. But I know you all well enough to know that you all want to see justice done. That's what we brought the rope for. We want the killer. We want. Now, quiet down there. Quiet, dog. It's like a nightmare. A million hands pull and drag me out of the jail, across the street and into this sleepy little park in the center of town. I try to laugh, man. I mean, it's a new kick being carried around like that. I try to laugh, yeah, but no laugh comes out. And then I see this rope. One with a long knot in it. And all of a sudden I know that the only cat that's going to be swimming at this party is me. I wonder whatever possessed that man at Pop's place to give us the wrong turn? Oh, I should have paid more attention to my sense of direction. All that driving. And here we are right back in Keeneland. I knew there was nobody in the street when we came through, and, well, now look at that crowd over there in the park. Probably a political rally of some sort. No. Look at that rally. They're gonna hang somebody. Hey, old timer. Yes, sir? What's going On. They caught that fellow what's been going around chopping up people over in Nevada. But he sure made a mistake when he killed old Pop Daniels here in Kingman this afternoon. We don't put up with that kind of thing. Look at that man they're putting the rope on. Isn't that the thing? That's our hitchhiker. They're making a terrible mistake. He was with us all afternoon. Walter, where are you going? You hang out him. If I don't stop him come back here, they'll hang you too. Hey, man, give me a break. Wait. I didn't do it. This man is innocent. Mistake. I'm a hell here, buddy. I'm a true. He's innocent. I can prove it, and I can prove. Give me a chance and listen to me. If you hang him, you'll hang an innocent man. I can prove he's innocent because he was with my wife and me all afternoon. Man, am I glad to see you. After that, it really wasn't any trouble. They told the cops where I'd been. Cops were mad because I wasn't the killer. But there wasn't anything they could do about it. And the next morning, I walk out of jail into the sunshine and the fresh air. Like, man. Man, it's. It's really great to be alive. And the world looks good. Even people look good. I walk down the main drag in a less than five blocks. I pass a little kid that tries to con me into buying up all his newspapers so he can go home early. The neon sign that screams good food and dance. A hundred cars driven by guys that don't own them. And no apology for some guy I bumped into. And then I start wondering, what am I so gone about, young man? Yeah, like, I wonder if you'd be so kind. You see, my daughter let me out of her car. She told me the optometrist was straight ahead, and somehow I got turned around. Would you lead me to the right door? Optometrists? Yes. I broke my glasses this morning. Well, Grandma, I don't know how you did it, but you drifted yourself down about two doors. Here, take my arm. Oh, thank you so much. You're such a kind young man. Hey, watch it. There's a step here. Oh, my, it's cool in here. Well, I didn't know you were a hip grandma. And what nice music on the radio. Yeah, mom, that's way out. Look, here's a chair. You sit down. Oh, thank you so much. Oh, my. Whatever would I have done without you? Shh. There's a sign over there that says, quiet, please. I'll tell the receptionist you're here. Don't go away. Can I help you? Yeah. Are you one of the family or a friend of the deceased? What's that? My mother. Yeah, she doesn't want to view the body. She just wants to sit here and meditate about the dearly departed. I see. Yeah. Yeah. Just leave her alone with her thoughts. I'll be by and pick her up in a while. We do our best to be a comfort in a time of trial and strength, Man. I get out of the street and I hot foot it way out in the desert. Before I fall down and bust out laughing. I think of that old chick sitting in that bureau parlor waiting for a pair of glasses and I just about crack up, man. Oh, I cracked. One thing about squares, man. They just never, ever learn. Suspense. In which Mr. Dennis Day starred in William and Robeson's production of Like Man, Somebody Dig Me, written by George Bamber. In tonight's story were Lillian Byeth, Bill Quinn, Jack Moyles, Paul Freeze and Sean Charles Seal. Listen. Listen again next week when we return with Miss Agnes Moorhead starring in Head Shrinker. Another tale well calculated. To keep you in suspense. The Jack Benny Program, presented by Lucky Strike. Be happy. Go Lucky. Be happy. Get better. Chase. Be happy. Go Lucky. Get better. Taste today. Lucky's taste better. So mild, so smooth, so firm and fresh. With better taste in every puff. Yes, Lucky's taste better. For Lucky's fine, mild, good tasting tobacco goes into the cigarette. Prove the best made of all five principal brands. Let me repeat that. Prove the best maid of all five principal brands. That's not an empty claim, that's a fact verified by leading laboratory consultants, for example, Foster D. Snell of New York City, who report, in our opinion, the properties measured are all important factors affecting the taste of cigarette smoke. We conclude that Lucky Strike is the best made of the five major brands. And don't forget lsmft, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Fine, mild, good tasting tobacco. There's no substitute for fine tobacco. And don't let anybody tell you different. So remember the facts. Enjoy fine, mild, good tasting tobacco. In the cigarette that tastes better, Lucky Strike. When you buy cigarettes, remember Lucky's taste better. Be happy. Go Lucky. Go Lucky Strike. Today, The lucky strike program starring jack benny. With mary livingston, phil harris, rochester dennis day, the sportsman quartet and yours truly, dod. Ladies and gentlemen, as you all know, in the Rose bowl game on New Year's Day, Illinois scalped the Stanford Indians. So now we bring You a man who could use one of those scalps, Jack Benny. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you. Hello again, this is Jack Benny talking. And Don, you can stop vibrating because that was the worst toupee joke I ever heard. Not only that, but it was in very bad taste. Bad taste? Yes. I don't mind for myself, but it so happens that the Stanford coach, Chuck Taylor, really wears a toupee. Now, now, wait a minute, Jack. I talked to Chuck Taylor right before the game. He's 31 years old and he definitely has his own hair. That was before the game. But when Illinois scored their first touchdown, his hair started to go. By the end of the third period, it was piling up on the ground. And all through that fourth quarter, it just laid there and turned gray. But, Don, that was really some game, wasn't it? It certainly wasn't, Jack, I heard you were sitting right on the 50 yard line. How'd you get such a good seat? Well, Don, it wasn't easy. You see, even though I've lived in California for the past 15 years, I was born in Waukegan. So in order to get tickets, I called Governor Stevenson of Illinois. Oh, and he got you the tickets? Well, no, you see, he couldn't do anything for me personally, so he called Governor Warren of California. Well, it was nice of Governor Warren to give you the tickets. Well, he couldn't do anything for me either. So he called Mr. McMillan, the city manager of Pasadena, who got in touch with Nancy Thorne, the Queen of the Tournament of Roses. Oh, the queen got you the tickets? Tickets? Well, not exactly. Well, then how'd you get in? I was the third princess on her. Right. I not only saw the game, but tonight I've got a date with the Stanford Center. You know, the way he raved over my blue eyes, I didn't have the heart to tell him. Don, who were you rooting for at the game? Well, Jack, I didn't want to show any partiality, so I got a seat on the Stanford side and a seat on the Illinois side. Don, how could you possibly sit on both sides of the. Oh, oh, of course. And Don, weren't you disappointed when you weren't picked as the winning float? I would have won, but I was sabotaged. Oh, yes, yes. Well, better luck next year, you know. Hiya. Don't say. Well, hello, Phil. Hello, Phil. Don and I were just discussing the Rose bowl game. Were you there? No, not this year. Well, you must have watched it on television. I start to Jackson, but I turned it off. Phil, how could you turn it off. Off. It was a wonderful game, I know, but I just couldn't take it. What do you mean? Look, Jackson, it's New Year's Day. I'm laying there with my eyes bloodshot, an ice bag on my head, the room spinning, and some character keeps yelling, look sharp, feel sharp. Be. Phil, if I'd have had anything sharp, I'd have cut my throat. All right, Phil. You've celebrated. You had your fun. Now it's time to work. The least you could have done is to see that all your boys showed up. What are you talking about? The band's here. Where's Remley, Sammy and Bagby? Your hoodlum section is missing. Hoodlum section? Now, hold it, Jackson. I don't think it's very nice the way you go on week after week, insulting those three boys. They may not. They may not be college graduates, but they come from good families. They're sensitive, refined and perfect gentlemen. And it's your fault that they're not here today. My fault? Yeah. If you'd have paid me more money, I could have bailed them out. Phil, they're in jail. What for? Cross the street in the middle of the block. Now, wait a minute, Phil. They can give you a ticket, but they can't put you in jail for walking across the street on their hands and knees. Oh, well, that's different. All right, Phil, I'll give you the money. Call on. Get call up and get the boys out. Okay. Thanks. Hand me that phone. Imagine crossing other hands and knees. Hello? Hello, Is this the Lincoln Heights jail? Well, Phil Harris, how are ya? Oh, fine, Captain, fine. Look, I called up about three of my boys. They're on the county again. Which one? The three with the tire marks on their backs. All those? I already released them. Well, what about the bail? I charged it to your account. Oh, good, good, good. I thought I was overdrawn. All that. By the way, Phil. Hey, Phil, would you send someone down to pick up their belongings? Their belongings? Yeah. When we arrested them, one of them was carrying a piano. I know it. I know it. One bottle opener and they gotta nail it to the sign way. I'll see you later, Captain. All right. So long, Phil. Hey, it's all set, Jackson. They'll be back next week, and I just hope that you'll treat them a little nicer. Oh, I will, Phil. I will. Who knows? Maybe the. Oh, hello, Mary. Hello, Jack. Well, you're here now. Where's Dennis? I don't know. He hasn't come in yet. How can we Go on with the show if the cast doesn't get here on time. Oh, Jack, don't be mad at Dennis. I happen to know something that you don't know. Well, don't tell me. Let me guess. It's about Dennis, huh? I know he's running for president. Besides that. What? Jack, this is something you won't believe. All right, what is it? Well, all of a sudden, Dennis got a big crush on me. Dennis has a crush on you? Yeah. Ever since last week when I danced with him at Charlie Foy's nightclub, he's been sending me notes and little gifts. Dennis has been sending you gifts? What'd he give you? Oh, a lot of things. His Boy Scout knife, a bag of marbles, three bottle cap, a ball of tinfoil, a fish hook, and a dead frog. Mary. You mean Dennis gave you all those? Mary, what's that you're wearing on your leg? His bicycle clip. We're engaged. Well, isn't that cute? So Dennis thinks he's in love with you? Yes. And, Jack, do me a favor, will you? When he comes in, don't kid him because he's so serious about. Oh, shh. Here he comes down. Hello, Mr. Ben. Oh, hello, Dennis. Hello, Dennis. Hello, Don. Hi, kid. Hello, Phil. Hello, Dennis. Dennis, I said hello, Mary. Don't make it so obvious. Obvious? All I said was hello. I know, but look at how you're trembling. Dennis, you're imagining things. She's not trembling. What are you trying to do, break us up? No, I'm not trying to break you up. Hey, Mary, come here a minute, will you? I want to look at you. Oh, all right, Dennis. Gee, gosh. Well, what is it, Dennis? To think that you'll soon be my wife and Babe will be my brother in law. That's nowhere on this page. It's better than what we had written there. I know that. Now, look, Dennis. Dennis, I don't want to break up your romance, but for two weeks now I've been anxious to see Death of a Salesman. So do you mind if I ask your fiance, Ms. Livingston, to go with me tonight? Hey, you're wasting your time, kid. Oh, I am, eh? What about Mary? Would you like to see Death of a Salesman? Oh, I'm sorry, Jack, but I already saw it. With whom, Dennis? Oh, I'll go with you, Mr. Benny. But you saw it with Mary, who looked at the pictures. Dennis, do me a favor, will you? Go ahead and sing your song. Ok. I wonder why you keep me waiting. Charmaine cries in vain. I wonder when bluebirds are Made Will you come back again? I wonder if I keep on praying Will our dreams be the same? I wonder if you ever think of me too Charmaine's waiting Just waiting for you. I won. Wonder if I keep on praying Will our dreams be the same? I wonder if you ever. Think of me O I'm waiting my Charmaine for your. That was. That was Charmaine sung by Dennis Dayan. Very good, Dennis. Thanks. And now, ladies and gentlemen. Oh, Mr. Penny, I want to congratulate you. Congratulate me? Yes. Radio and Television Daily took a poll and you were voted radio's man of the Year. Well, thank you, Dennis. Don't thank me. I voted for somebody. El. All right, now, behave yourself. And now, ladies and gentlemen, For our feature attraction tonight, we're going to present a sketch based on one of radio's most popular dramatic shows. Suspense. Now, in this sketch I will play the part of. Oh, darn it. Hello? Hello, Mr. Berry? This is Rochester. Rochester. I was just starting my sketch. What do you want? I thought you might like to know a friend of yours from Waukegan just phoned from the Union Station. A friend of mine? His name is Cliff Gordon. Cliff Gordon? Why, Rochester, he's one of my best friends. We grew up together. He said you were Were born in the same hospital on the very same day. That's right, Rochester. How did he sound? Well. Well what? Either you're over 39 or we had a very bad connection. Never mind. Anyway, that's Cliff for you. The minute he gets in, he calls me. I hope you told him he can stay in the guest room. Yeah, but he said he was going to the Biltmore. But Rochester, we have the extra room. Why doesn't he stay with us? I guess it was my. My fault, boss. What do you mean, your fault? At first I didn't know he was your friend. I quoted him. Tourist race. Oh, yes. Mike Desale set them for us. Well, Rochester, when did Mr. Gordon say he was coming over to visit me tonight? About 8 o'. Clock. Oh, darn it. And I wanted to see Death of a Salesman. Oh, well, I can see it some other time. Goodbye, Rochester. Goodbye, Old. Say, boss. Now what? They just brought back your man's will. Good. But why did it take so long? Well, it took four days to take off the roses and two days to drive it back from Pasadena. All that trouble and no prizes. Well, so long, Rochester. Goodbye. Now, ladies and gentlemen, as I started to say, for our feature attraction tonight, we're going to present our version of one of radio's most popular shows. Suspense. Set the scene, Don. Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we will usher in the 1952 season by presenting a sketch fraught with drama and excitement and, well calculated to keep you in suspense. My name is Aristotle Fink. It's an ordinary name, and I'm an ordinary guy. Until last week, I was a teller at the California bank in Glendale. But now I'm a teller at the California bank in Beverly Hills. No, I wasn't promoted. The rain just changed our location. I live in a small cottage with my wife mary and our 21 children. The reason I had 21 children is because at one time I hated my wife and wanted to lose her in the crowd. But since then, we were serenely happy. Until that fateful day that changed my humdrum life into a tale well calculated to keep you in suspense. That eventful morning started like any other. I had just finished my breakfast and turned to my wife and said. It was a wonderful breakfast, dear, but I must leave you now and go to work. I'll be waiting for you, darling. I can't wait to return. I'll be counting the hours. I'll be counting the children. Good, good. That reminds me. You better wake Philip up. I don't want him to be late for school. Oh, here he is now. Good morning, Philip. Good morning, Mother. Good morning, dad. Something always happened to me when he called me dad. But I take a little bicarbonate and feel better. I had a few minutes before going to work, so I decided to have a fatherly talk with Philip. Philip, have you given any thought to the future? Yes, I have, dad. Good. What do you want to do when you grow up? I want to lead an orchestra. Oh, so you want to be a musician? No, I just want to lead an orchestra. But, Philip, leading an orchestra would be a waste of your talents. You are a great student. You are an educated fellow. You are a fine Beta Kappa. I are? That's right, son, you am. And you're destined for greater things than. Here's your school books and your lunch, Phillips. Thank you, Mother. Did you prepare something nice for lunch? Yes. Two chicken sandwiches, an apple, a banana, and your thermos bottle is filled with milk. Milk? Yes, milk. This is a sketch. Now hurry, or you'll be late for school. Goodbye, Mother. Goodbye, dad. And I do mean dad. All of my children left for school, and it was such a beautiful day that I decided to walk to the bank. In fact, as I walked along with the sun shining in my face, my heart was so filled with joy, I started to sing. I wish I was a swinging, clinging vine I wish I was a swinging clinging vine if I was a swinging, clinging vine I'd only cling to the gala mine I wish I was a swinging clinging vine hi ho, fiddle dee Tell you what I'd like to be hi ho, fiddle dee Here is what I dream I wish I was a good old Lucky Strike I wish I was a good old Lucky Strike if I's a good old Lucky Strike I'd be the cigarette you like I wish I was a good old Lucky Strike hi ho, fiddle dee dee Tell you what I'd like to be hi ho, fiddle dee the Lucky Strike is what I'd like to be I wish I was an LSMFT I wish I was an lsmft if I's an LSMFT I'd be so very proud of me I wish I was Little D I hope and leave Tell you what I'd like to be I hope and leap an LSMFT I'd like to be. I wish I. I wish I had a match somewhere on me. I wish I had a match somewhere on me. Cause if I's an lsmft I take that match and light up me. I wish I had a better voice on me. If I was an LSMFT high hope and leapy Everyone could take a puff on me I wish I had a hundred million friends I wish I had a hundred million friends If I had a hundred million friends I'd show them I had no loose ends I wish I had 100 million friends hi home, fiddly bee Tell you what I'd like to be Fly home, fiddle eb and lsmft I'd like to be like to be like to be like to be like to be. I arrived at the bank and this day was like all the others, with one exception. A man came to my window. A man who was destined to change my life story from a peaceful one to a tale well calculated. To keep you in. I didn't say it yet. To keep you in suspense. Watch it, fellas. This man came up to my window and thrust a bill at me. It was a genuine $10,000 bill. I looked at him for a moment, then looked back at his $10,000 bill when he I'd like to change this, but. But this is a $10,000 bill. I know. It's the smallest I got. Okay, I'll change it. Would you like the change in thousand dollar bills? Hundreds, fifties, twenties, tens or fives? I want it in pennies. You. You want $10,000? In pennies. Why, I got 500. Peggy back. Thanks for Christmas. I complied with his request, also sorry that I gave him that joke. I gave him $10,000 worth of pennies, which he put in his pockets. And my eyes followed him as he walked out, leaving his pants behind. I then stared at the bill and realized that I, Aristotle Fink, held this treasure in my hand. Suddenly, a harmless thought struck me. My family had never seen a $10,000 bill, and it wouldn't hurt anyone if I took it home and showed it to them. As I entered my house, my wife was standing in the hall. Hello, darling. Oh, quick, come in. Shut the door. All right, darling. Now I want to show. Don't talk. Help me close the windows. They're closed now, darling. Wait, wait. Help me open the Airwick. Airwig. What's the matter? The shrimp boats are coming. That's not important now, darling, I have a surprise for you. For me too, dad? Yes, for you, too, Philip. Oh, for heaven's sake, Philip, Must you always go around with your pants dragging? I can't help it, Mother. I don't have a belt or anything to keep them up with. Why, Philip, to hear you talk, a person would think I don't make enough money to keep you in suspenders. I said suspenders. Stupid hoodlums. § what's the surprise, dear? Something I want you all to see. Philip is here. Call the rest of the children. Okay. Sam, Peggy, Hilda, Milton, George, Ada, Marie, Ellen, John Hiller, Jeanette, Bonnie, Jean, Steven, Terry, Harriet, Albert, Julius, Crenshaw, Pico and Sepulveda. All of our children got along well, except Pico and Sepalda. They kept crossing each other. Suddenly, the door opened and the children ran in. When I was a young man, I never dreamed that I, Aristotle Fink, would ever have so many children. The children all here dying. Now, tell them about your surprise. Okay. Now listen, you little finks. I want to show you this. It's a $10,000 bill. Here, take it. Philip, why aren't you looking at the $10,000 bill? That don't mean nothing to me. I've seen them before. You have? Yeah. There's a little blonde in my class named Alice who's loaded with us. All right, children, give me back the bill. Children. Children. Somewhere on the tour, through the hands of my children, the $10,000 bill disappeared. I looked for the money all that night, but couldn't find it. And the following morning, when I went to work, the president of the bank sent for me. I walked into the office of this very rich man, he was sitting at his desk playing tiddly winks with Silver tiddly. I looked at him, tiddly timidly, and said, You sent for me, sir? Yes. Do you know that $10,000 is missing from your accounts? Yeah, yeah. Yes, sir. Did you take it? Yes, sir. Do you think that was not nice? No, sir. Well, watch it next time. But I didn't steal it, sir. I only took it home to show it to my wife and kids. I know you didn't mean to steal it, but it's out of my hands now. There's a police inspector outside, Ms. Jones. Send the inspector in. Suddenly the door opened and the policeman walked in carrying a pair of handcuffs. He walked over to us and said, okay, put these on, fatso. Not me. He's the guilty one. Oh. Are you a fink? Yes. What's your name? You just said it. A fink. Well, what do you think, fink? You're going to the clink. Oh, no, I'm not. Come one step nearer and I'll stab you. Look, Oligod, he's got a knife. Don't be a fool. Put down that knife. Oh, yeah. Take that. Get away from me. Don't come near me with that knife. I haven't done anything. Oh, yes, you have. And I'm going to stab you, too. Take that. I didn't shoot them folks. I stabbed them. But the sound man is still sore at me on a car of the lousy Christmas present I gave. And that is my story. Now I'm in my cell in the state prison awaiting my execution tomorrow night. But in the cell next to me is a traveling man named Frederick, who was convicted of killing his wife by hitting her over the head with his sample case. In a few hours, Frederick walks his last mile to the electric chair. Oh, it's small consolation, but before I go, I'll finally get to see Frederick March in Death of a Salesman. A picture well calculated to keep you in suspense. Jack. We'll be back in just a moment. But first, Be happy. Go Lucky get better. Take today Lucky's taste better. Friends. Lsmft, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Fine, mild, good tasting tobacco. There's no substitute for fine tobacco. And don't let anybody tell you different. Yes, Lucky's taste better. For Lucky's fine, mild, good tasting tobacco goes into the cigarette. Proved the best made of all five principal brands. Let me repeat that. Prove the best made of all five principal brands. That's not an empty claim. That's a fact verified by leading laboratory consultants for example Frohling and Robertson of Richmond, Virginia, who report, it is our conclusion that Lucky Strike is the best made of these five major brands. Friends, to get the facts that you as a smoker will want to know about cigarette quality. To learn the plain, simple truth about the important factors that affect the taste of a cigarette, send for your free copy of a new booklet, what makes Lucky Strike Taste better? Just drop a card to Lucky Strike Post office, box 99, New York, 46, New York. That's Lucky Strike post office, box 99, New York,. 46, New York. Be happy. Go Lucky. Go Lucky Strike today. Good night, folks. This is the CBS Radio Network. We just heard the Stars of the Day Jack Benny program all in radio thrillers that will do it for this week's show. Thanks so much for joining me. I hope you'll be back next week for more old time radio suspense. In the meantime, you can check out down these Mean Streets, my Radio Detective podcast. New episodes of that show are out on Sundays. If you like what you're hearing, don't be a stranger. You can rate an orchestra. Review the show in Apple podcasts or wherever you listen. And if you'd like to lend support to the show, you can visit buymeacoffee.com meansts OTR. I'll be back next week with more Hollywood stars, each of them appearing in tales well calculated. To keep you in suspense, Sam. Ladies and gentlemen, the chief hope of our enemies is to divide the United States along racial and religious lines and thereby conquer us. Let's not spread prejudice. A divided America is a weak America. Through our behavior, we encourage the respect of our children and make them better neighbors to all races and religions. Remind them that being good neighbors has helped make our country great and kept her free. Thank you.
Podcast: Stars on Suspense
Host: Mean Streets Podcasts
Air Date: May 14, 2026
Theme: A star-studded showcase of actors from The Jack Benny Program trading punchlines for peril in classic radio thrillers, plus a sharp-witted Benny-led suspense spoof.
This episode spotlights beloved cast members from The Jack Benny Program as they step into the tension-filled world of Suspense. Listeners are treated to five radio thrillers featuring Joseph Kearns, Ronald Colman, Phil Harris & Alice Faye, Jack Benny himself, and Dennis Day, capped off by a comic suspense parody performed by the Benny ensemble. The host sets the stage by noting the Jack Benny cast's comic genius and contrasting it with their performances in suspense-driven stories.
The episode cleverly contrasts the comedic personas of the Benny regulars with their performances in radio thrillers, drawing out both genuine chills and sly, era-specific satire. The Suspense episodes are played straight — sometimes with dark humor, always with expert timing — while the Benny parody gleefully lampoons the genre’s trappings with self-referential wit. Standout performances include Colman’s urbane intensity, Harris and Faye’s down-home pathos, and Benny’s blend of pathos and punchline.
This episode is a vibrant sampler—both a tribute and a gentle roast—of what made The Jack Benny Program and Suspense so enduring. It’s rich with Old Time Radio legends, meta-comedy, and the fascinating collision of comedy and thriller storytelling, all anchored by standout performances and sharp writing.