Racer X

Bad AI Transcript

Who knows what they’re getting down on? They’re getting down on life. What do you think about that? Get down on it. Get down on it. Bye. get down on it this is miles you know what this platform needs? What? Captioning. I want to see my words around the bottom of the screen yeah you say, If it’s on the bottom of the screen, you say. Get down on it. Down on it. There you go. Yeah. Everybody’s tired tonight, Miles. I don’t know what’s going on. It’s the beginning of summertime. In the summertime when the weather is hot. Can we trot up and touch the sky when the weather is hot? Who sang that? Mongo Jerry. Mongo Jerry. Ah, my goodness. Yeah, so doing summertime activities. How about yourself? Yeah, yeah, pretty much. Oh, really? What did you do? Summertime activity. Mowed the grass? I stayed inside pretty much, and then I mowed the grass, yeah. You’re supposed to be the sweaty, fat neighbor. Oh, I am. I am. Okay, well, that’s good. Wish granted. Wish granted, yeah.
Yeah, where the camera pans over and you’re, you know, the lawnmower’s smoking and then you’re waving at the camera. Yeah, that’s me. Yeah, you’re sweating profusely. You got like an old kitchen dish towel around your neck. Around my waist. Then that would be like what? A couple of different dozen towels? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think so. What’s weird is the neighbor’s constantly gardening. I’ll wake up at 6 to let the dogs out. I’ll look over. He’s out there. I’m like, Jesus. Really? Maybe he lives out there now. Maybe that’s where he is. I think his wife has banished him out to the garden. I know. He’s just constantly out there. Make some food for us. Does he ever give you any tomatoes or anything? He used to give me egg rolls. You don’t garden egg rolls, I don’t think.
Thank you. do you pull them when they’re ready just kind of dig them up okay are you sure you’re not thinking of eggplant no he’s no this guy used to make egg rolls man do you think now that eggplant, since it’s a symbol for penis and texting that whenever people give other people an eggplant, they think it’s rude. I hope so, because my wife just bought her best friend an eggplant ceramic thing. Like when you’re cooking, you put your spoon somewhere to rest it. So it’s like a big penis spoon holder? Yeah. Oh, how interesting. Her friend loves penis. Well, I think that’s true. I was just wondering, yeah, if you’re just like, oh, I had some extra eggplants. You pervert. You know how you like eating free grapes in the supermarket? Well, that’s how she is with – Eggplants? Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. Get down on it. I was given an opportunity this weekend, and it was – all I can say is this opportunity was a total Miles title opportunity that I took full advantage of.
You know, you sent me some vague pictures. I go, that son of a bitch. That son of a bitch got some nice freebie somewhere, and he’s going to rub it in my face. I think it was… Personally, it’s one of the nicer freebies that I’ve ever gotten. So I get… Because of the field that I am in, sometimes I am offered free tickets to things and free this and free that. And I just… I usually say no. I say no thanks. That’s okay. But this time I was offered something and it intrigued me. And so I’m like, well, wait a minute. The musical Stomp. That’s right. I got free tickets to Stomp. Yeah, right? It was Sesame Street Live, and I dressed up as Elmo. I cosplayed Elmo. Tickle me. That’s right. Tickle me, children.
No, no, no. So they offered up tickets to go to the racetrack here in St. Louis, right? There’s a big racetrack here in St. Louis. There is? Yeah. I think it does NASCAR and IndyCar racing, right? So this is not like the low-end mini sprint midget things or whatever they used to do. This is like real racing. Is it right in the city, though, or is it like out in the suburbs somewhere? Well, I was almost going to be flippant and say it’s just like the bears out in the middle of nowhere. Oh, you son of a bear. Yes, it’s on the east side in the middle of nowhere. But I’ve always been curious. Not that I’m a racing person. I’m definitely not. This is definitely not one of the things that I would –
pay money for, but I’m certainly going to take full advantage because number one, they not only offered me tickets, they offered me the box suite tickets where you go in the air conditioning and have free drinks and food. You’re a freaking jerk. And free VIP parking. Oh, you don’t deserve this. You don’t even deserve it. I asked my friend, Hefe, I said, Hefe, do you want to go to the races with me? Not Dr. J, right? No, no, Dr. J. No, Dr. J. This is my friend, Hefe. I’ve known him most of my life. And I said, I go, I got these box seats to the – these box tickets to the races. And I go, I’m probably going to have to talk to somebody, but –
I mean, if this is the time you want to go see the races, this would be the time, right? And Jefe goes, I’ve never been. I’ll take you up on your freebie, my friend, right? Yeah, you know who also hasn’t been? Me. Yeah, me. Well, live a little closer, maybe. Jefe just lived real close. Yeah, I know. I’d get screwed again. Thanks. Yeah. Wait a minute. Should I go into the fact that Saturday I was going to meet you somewhere and you ditched me? For all those years, you bitched about me screwing you out of those Star Trek movie tickets. That’s true. The first remake of Star Trek, yes. Go ahead. I’m sorry. Go ahead. So you and Faye get up this beautiful freebie. Well, you wouldn’t meet me in the middle of nowhere…
play pinball or something. So I figured there’s no way he’s going to come down here all the way down here to go to the race thing. Yeah, that’s true. So I’m like, all right, Jefe, come over and then we’ll run down to the racetrack. And so we did. So he’s like, yeah, I...