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Stavi
How do you feel when you switch to Geico and save on your car insurance? It's like finishing your laundry and successfully matching all your daughter's baby socks together.
Marie Faustin
On the first try. Let's see.
Stavi
Panda socks, firetruck socks. Socks with those cute little strawberries on them. You matched each and every one of those tiny socks.
Marie Faustin
I mean, has this ever happened in.
Stavi
The history of laundry? And a penguin wearing a cowboy hat? Socks. Done. Enjoy the moment, dad. You've earned it. Yep, switching and saving with Geico feels just like that. Get more with Geico. Welcome, Everybody, to Stavi's World. 904, 800 STAV call in. We'll solve your problems. Welcome. Thanks for coming, gals. We have Lisa Trager. We have Marie Faustin returning. Thanks for coming. And actually, Liza, this is your first time here, but you. We said 2:00. You didn't get lost or were late at all. You actually got here at 1:55. And Marie, I actually got a text from you at around 1:55 that said traffic was bad, which is interesting because I didn't know. I didn't know that when traffic's good, you can get from Brooklyn to Queens in five minutes. That's actually new information to me.
Marie Faustin
I'm. I'm on the train. Your text goes, I'm about to head out the door. I go, What?
Lisa Trager
It was 146.
Marie Faustin
I could have won for a game of Tetris in. But even knowing that you would be tardy, I see still had to be on time to the party. I don't know.
Lisa Trager
That's why me and Sydney can't be on the podcast.
Stavi
No, no, no. Sydney was on time the last time she did the episode, and it literally shocked me and messed things up because I had budgeted an extra 15 minutes minimum. Knowing Sydney was be like, she came in, I was eating lunch. I was like, you're here five minutes early.
Marie Faustin
That's the worst. There was one time you came before me and I was humiliated because I was giving you shit like, you better not be late. The boat's going to leave. And then you were there before I.
Stavi
Was on the boat.
Marie Faustin
And that felt like. Because that's playing you. You know, glass houses.
Stavi
Of course. There's nothing worse than when your piece of late friend. And we all have them. One of them is on the couch right now. Nothing worse than when they beat you somewhere.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
And you're nothing worse when stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You immediately get judgmental. It's like the psychology of when you let somebody in versus when you've cut the lot. When you're driving and you're like, cut people off to get in. And then you're like, oh, thank God. And then somebody tries to get in. You're like, you animal. You animal. This is why we have traffic.
Marie Faustin
You know what I always say? I'm like, I bet. I'm like, someone's in trouble. Oh, that's true.
Stavi
That's positive thinking that way.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. Sometimes if I'm. If I'm stoned enough, I'm like, I have a family emergency.
Stavi
If you're serene and you're stoned, you're.
Marie Faustin
Like, if I'm not running late to a thing, then I can get in the Uber.
Lisa Trager
The first thing I say is, how long does it say it's going to take to get there? And then whatever they say, I go, can you get me there faster than that? My flight is leaving in seven minutes.
Stavi
Have you ever missed a flight?
Lisa Trager
Of course.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Okay, good. I missed a flight, like two months ago. Okay. That at least makes me feel that you have hurt yourself and not just me. You know what I mean?
Marie Faustin
That has. Oh, this is. You know what I was thinking? Have you ever had a situation where friends are like, her, we're going to take the table so we don't lose it and then you don't get to come.
Stavi
No.
Marie Faustin
That's fun.
Stavi
Yeah, I was thinking that. No.
Marie Faustin
So they'd be like, take it.
Lisa Trager
No.
Marie Faustin
Recently, my friends had to lie and go, she's in the bathroom. But I was nowhere near that venue.
Stavi
Yeah. Oh, places that won't unless the whole party's there.
Marie Faustin
So they missed one table and I was still walking. And then they lied and said I was in the bathroom.
Stavi
Yeah, but.
Lisa Trager
Table.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, but. But we got the table.
Stavi
That's good.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Sometimes you gotta lie. Sometimes you gotta lie.
Marie Faustin
But I had to try on the, you know, seven to eight outfits before I try. Put it back on. The first pair of sweatpants.
Stavi
Of course, to go to a diner with your friends, you gotta look.
Marie Faustin
But, you know, people are chic in the. In New York City. People are inspiring. You want to kind of bring something to the streets and you can try to fall in love. Sorry. I mean, like, I want, you know, I'm trying to.
Stavi
A chance encounter. You want to be breath.
Lisa Trager
You can make sweatpants chic in New York?
Marie Faustin
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.
Stavi
It's possible.
Marie Faustin
I had a crop top.
Lisa Trager
I don't know if you can.
Stavi
How dare you. Of the three of us, one of us has made sweat attire. One of his signature looks. Thank you very much. Okay, I'm out there.
Marie Faustin
No, usually on planes, I love, you know, I'm a sweatpants sweatshirt nonstop. I look crazy. And I'm like, again, I need to see if I can meet someone out in the world. Maybe someone else is traveling a lot and wants to be.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
And then when I landed, my whole family was like, why are you wearing business casual? Are you on your lunch break from the office?
Lisa Trager
You got a blazer on Delta 1?
Marie Faustin
No, but I had a little like. Like a. A dupe of those expensive kind of wrinkly silk pants, you know, with a. Tucked.
Lisa Trager
Like a. Tucked in.
Stavi
Tucked in is wild. Oh, wow. A turtleneck and then 300.
Marie Faustin
Like, I had like a Jenny Kane sweater.
Lisa Trager
I don't know.
Marie Faustin
It shows.
Stavi
Yeah, that was too much.
Lisa Trager
I don't think it was the other way like that.
Marie Faustin
No, that. It felt weird. And as soon as I landed, my whole family was in disarray at my business casual time.
Lisa Trager
So you dress like you're going to the club in 2009.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
My salon receptioning to the club days.
Stavi
Hell yeah.
Marie Faustin
Oh, my gosh.
Stavi
Eldest is in there. H m blazer, little skinny tie, ready.
Marie Faustin
To go, dude, were you like, okay, go punk.
Stavi
Punk rock type the killers. No. I don't know that we even thought for one second about how we dressed. We had no look whatsoever. I mean, it was just how baggy pants are. That was how we dressed in high school. I mean, Baltimore city, literally. Throwback jerseys and fucking big ass pants. That's kind of how I dressed in high school. And then in college, I tried to wear different. There's a picture me where I look hysterical, where I'm trying to. I'm wearing like a fitted black long shirt. And then my pants. I look like I'm in the background of a Nelly video. So it's like the biggest pants you've ever seen in your life and like a nice little black, like, I don't know, almost formal shirt. I look so stupid.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, no, I bought goth pants once from gadzooks and my.
Lisa Trager
Shaggy.
Stavi
Yeah, I actually got a shirt from zoinks made me.
Marie Faustin
I'm wearing a jinky bra right now. No, my parents made me return them immediately.
Stavi
Oh, they wouldn't allow you to be goth?
Marie Faustin
Get back to the. Thank God they were such wide, big pay.
Stavi
I didn't need jinkos.
Marie Faustin
No, but they were. I'm glad they. It was $70.
Stavi
Sure.
Marie Faustin
He want that back.
Lisa Trager
He want that back.
Stavi
They wouldn't allow you to be goth. Your parents?
Marie Faustin
I didn't want to be Goth. I don't know what I was doing. I went to one concert. One. I don't know.
Stavi
Yeah, I have no idea what took.
Marie Faustin
Over, but I do have a red Hot chili pepper tattoo that's haunted my life.
Stavi
Interesting. That's not Goth at all.
Marie Faustin
But I love the Backstreet Boys. But yet I wanted these Jinkos. Like, I don't know what was interesting. Obviously, just rebellion, identity issues.
Stavi
How old were you? What are we talking?
Marie Faustin
Junior high.
Stavi
Junior high. Okay. That's a tough time.
Lisa Trager
Well, the giant pants are back, and I'm not mad at it.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. But now I can't. Where I would look like a bully. Older sister. Like, that's a good look.
Stavi
That's somebody. Somebody's into that.
Lisa Trager
That's more to you.
Stavi
Yeah, I know. Who are you kidding? Lisa? Oh, the perfect look for you.
Lisa Trager
Older sister.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, I'm working on it. Winter, I could. I could put it together. Summer. But winter, it's just so hard to.
Stavi
Make the shift of.
Marie Faustin
Like, you want to be warm but not hot. Walking a lot, but I don't know, it's so difficult.
Stavi
Layering is tough.
Lisa Trager
It's so hard to get dressed like this time of year. Yeah. Because it's like, do I need a jacket? Can I wear shorts? Do I need sleeves?
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Like, what is 58 degrees?
Stavi
58 degrees is tough. I agree with you. But it's getting cold. You should just plan for cold and then have a backup plan now.
Lisa Trager
Yeah. But then I hate when I get where I'm going and I'm hot.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Now I'm like, I gotta tie my coat around my waist.
Stavi
That is a tough look. Yeah. Yeah, that then Lisa's bullying you. Yeah. She sees you with a thing around your waist.
Lisa Trager
I'm wearing a North Face around my waist.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Crazy.
Stavi
That's it. That sucks. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Someone's doing well.
Lisa Trager
Is that posh?
Marie Faustin
No, just for me in 10th grade, it was.
Stavi
It was a. Yes, I believe north face was a status.
Marie Faustin
I had a Columbia in high school. My parents.
Stavi
I had a South Pole as well. The Black and Orange Classic. You know that one? Remember that one?
Lisa Trager
Elders, the orange fur.
Stavi
It was the orange inside, black outside with fur I had.
Marie Faustin
Actually, you all saw the Reba McIntyre boots with the fur situation.
Stavi
I did not see that.
Marie Faustin
Okay, so obviously the song from our childhood is Boots with the Fur. So you're imagining a boot with a fur.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Right.
Marie Faustin
So she posted a photo. She's an older white woman of boots and then wearing a fur and she put. She wrote boots with the fur and. And everyone's brains exploded, cuz.
Stavi
But it works.
Marie Faustin
It works. But no one, even she's an innovator about it once.
Stavi
She's an innovator. She's an innovator. I tip my captoriba.
Marie Faustin
She also brought corn dogs back.
Lisa Trager
I would say a single mom who works too hard.
Stavi
Two jobs. Yeah. A single mom who works. I'm a survivor. Well, I wish I knew more of that song.
Lisa Trager
I know that's all you really need.
Marie Faustin
Fancy's good, but, you know, it's great. When my niece wants to wear things in my old closet. She'll be like, can I have this? And I'm like, oh, my God. Yeah.
Stavi
That must feel good.
Marie Faustin
It feels so.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're in a cyclical zone of. And it really is what looked what people wore when we were children, which is hilarious.
Marie Faustin
Which I love. I have my coach purse that's waiting for me. My mom found it. Can't wait to bust it back.
Lisa Trager
My mom used to say this to me all the time. Fashion is cyclical. And I was always like, shut up. Like, you can't.
Stavi
You can't even dress.
Lisa Trager
Shut your Jordash mouth up.
Stavi
Right?
Lisa Trager
And then I got bell bottoms. And she was like, we used to wear those. And I was like, no, you didn't. Yeah, well, where's all your old flares? And she was like, I left them in Europe. And it was like, why are you talking to me?
Stavi
Yeah. Wow, your mom's stunting on you. She's like, I dress better than you. I used to live in Europe. You're.
Lisa Trager
She's like, you just in New York ass.
Stavi
You're an uncultured New York swine.
Lisa Trager
But my mom got rid of all her stuff. But my dad still has all his, like, suits from the 70s 80s. And I think my brother wore one of the suits to prom. And he looked crazy.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah.
Lisa Trager
But he was cool. So they were like, yeah, you look all right.
Stavi
Wow. That's the ultimate sign of. Of. That's how, like, how power is conditional in high school, where it's like, if you're cool, you can get away with a lot.
Lisa Trager
Yes.
Stavi
It's a real flex to dress stupid and stuff.
Marie Faustin
But they don't. That's the thing.
Stavi
That's why, you know, they don't. They.
Marie Faustin
They can, but they don't. I'm thinking about the cool people in my. When I was growing up, and that was very strictly Abercrombie.
Stavi
Of course, Hollister.
Marie Faustin
There was no Deterioration. Deterior.
Stavi
Not deterioration. Delineation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
Oh, delineation. That's the word of the day.
Stavi
That's actually not it either. Delineation means like to separate things. Not quite. You're getting closer. Diversion, deviation.
Marie Faustin
Come on out the world.
Stavi
Eldest said that with like family feud energy. Like we're on two X's and we need one last one. Oh, eldest goddess.
Marie Faustin
38 points.
Stavi
Yeah, that is funny. It definitely wasn't Abercrombie. You're right. It was a. That was. Those were the two. The two concurrently running things was at my high school. It was all like baggy ass, you know, jeans and like that. And then at like Greek at the church youth camp, everyone was like preppy and.
Marie Faustin
Or baby for some reason. Like if you were a little slutty or baby would enter the mix.
Stavi
Certainly. I definitely wanted. Yes. I definitely. Yes. I was a fan of the BB girls for sure.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Loved that stuff.
Marie Faustin
They had fake IDs.
Stavi
Yeah. Oh yeah, 100%. They wouldn't. Yeah, they were dating 25 year olds when they were 16. They wouldn't listen.
Lisa Trager
Which is nasty now.
Stavi
No, it's horrible. But yeah, they were cool back then. They're like, whoa. They get to ride in that guy's BMW that his mom probably has the papers for.
Lisa Trager
But this is mom's car.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
We bullied our swim coach because he said his mom got him his Volkswagen Golf. And we were like, your mom bought your car, you dumb piece of. He was 25, like living the drip. Like.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
My parents. Yeah, that. It feels so normal. But we were so like grossed out by him.
Lisa Trager
I feel like teachers when we were growing up had two ages. Either they were like 22 or there were 180. And it was like we just thought they were all old, but they were all like super young.
Marie Faustin
No, I saw one before seventh grade started my English teacher doing this at 7:11 to the Slurpees into his mouth. I was like, mister.
Stavi
Well, believe it.
Marie Faustin
We'll bleep it so hot if you're divorced or anything.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that. I mean there's no way you can respect a teacher if you see him do that. Like you see him pull that move. That's insane.
Lisa Trager
That's nasty.
Stavi
Yeah, that's just like non hygiene. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
He had a tie dye shirt on. But also at the end of the year, a big project it was. We had to do a magazine that was like person of the millennium. I picked Barbara Walters of the millennium.
Stavi
Barbara. Yep. Thousand years of history. Barbara Walters is the most notable person. Barbara Walters.
Lisa Trager
Is she the one that has in. Is it crap?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's had some great. She's had some bangers and she's. She was a Playboy bunny, I believe she went undercover for a story. For a story. She.
Marie Faustin
She dressed as a playboy, worked for 70 years.
Lisa Trager
Was she a Playboy bunny in the 40s?
Stavi
Like, no, like, she was a waitress at the Playboy Club. As, like as part of a. Part of reporting. There's a picture of it.
Marie Faustin
My cough.
Stavi
Yeah, that's her, right?
Lisa Trager
That's Barbara Walters.
Stavi
Oh, yeah, yeah. She's looking good. Shout out to barbs.
Lisa Trager
That's how you know the pictures. Oh, this black and white. Oh, yeah, it's sepia filter.
Marie Faustin
But you did write other articles at some crime stuff. But I, you had to put. I put ads in it. And he. This, the same teacher went, corona, that's my favorite beer. I'm giving you an A. And gave me an A. Right?
Stavi
That's weird. That guy shouldn't be around kids. But the Corona commercial. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and say leave his name in there and put him in the registry. If he's telling kids his favorite beer.
Lisa Trager
Send it the FBI beer.
Stavi
Yeah, Yeah. A guy doing this would be like sick beer choice, 14 year old.
Lisa Trager
But also Corona is your favorite beer.
Stavi
That checks out.
Marie Faustin
I just had a Peroni for the first timer.
Stavi
Like delicious.
Lisa Trager
I don't like beer, so I don't either.
Marie Faustin
But that Peroni hit in a way that Peronis are.
Stavi
I'll give you Peronis is Peroni.
Lisa Trager
Fancy Italian people beer.
Marie Faustin
I don't even know if it's fancy, but it just was. So, Chris.
Stavi
Yeah. If you were the teacher and a kid did a Peroni ad.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
You'd be all in. You'd be all in.
Lisa Trager
That mess up the whole curve.
Stavi
Yeah. Folks, let's be honest. You know what people want? They want to see their favorite people. That's why on my aura frame, I have Susan Sarandon in her big ass titties. And me and my friend Caleb. And then look at that. Oh, me, Ben Eldest on Ben's birthday. That's what I have on my aura frame. Name the number one digital photo frame by Wirecutter. Aura frames are incredibly smart and easy to use. You can upload them from your phone. Unlimited photos and videos directly from your phone to your frame. Here's a picture of Spanakopita, a Greek delicacy. I have one myself. As you can see that I've loaded up with my favorite Things. I've given them to my mother, my grandmother, my cousin Eldest has given them to his family. Everybody loves them. It's a hit. It's easy as hell. We were in this weird time where we're taking so many pictures, but we don't get to enjoy them. The aura frame is a way to enjoy them. And it's a great present this holiday season for anybody that you don't know what to get that misses you. Family member in law. This is me and Elders when we made a film 15 years ago. And I slap him. He's wearing a shirt that says I heart dick. These are the memories that I care about. Whatever your memories are, whoever. Here's an AI generated GILF with huge tits. So whatever it is you want to put in your aura frame, you can do it right now. Save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com to get $35 off or as best selling carver matte frames by using promo code STAVI at checkout. That's a U R A frames.com promo code STAVI. This deal is exclusive to listeners, so get yours now in time for the holidays. Terms and conditions apply. Al Pagino and Robert De Niro, you grew up in Chicago.
Marie Faustin
Chicago suburbs.
Stavi
Chicago suburbs. Okay. You are. We have. And I want to say you got. When did you come to America? You were.
Marie Faustin
I was three.
Stavi
You were three?
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Similar. Eldest. We got two Eastern European refugees. Oh, where are you from?
Marie Faustin
I'm from Ukraine, President Day. Ukraine. Oh, cool.
Stavi
Yeah, he came from Albania, Greece. Stepped in, stopped in Greece and then came to Baltimore. And then.
Marie Faustin
So thank God we didn't go to Brighton Beach. That's actually like my sliding doors moment.
Stavi
Oh, really?
Lisa Trager
Experience.
Marie Faustin
All of our, like, gross family went to Brighton beach living the same weird life, like never coming out of it. And I just want to know if I was. I would have escaped or been in that site. Like, I just.
Stavi
If you would have been caught there, if you would have been like helping.
Marie Faustin
Posing next to rocks like this.
Stavi
Yeah. Hair teased up, nice to the heavens. Real Russian looking.
Lisa Trager
I love that look for you.
Stavi
Yeah? Yeah.
Lisa Trager
I love you posing next to some rocks.
Stavi
What is it with a purple with like a. You're sorry to cut you off. Like a grant. Like your uncle. Purple as shit. Just in the sun all day, just getting that weird, fucked up Russian tan.
Marie Faustin
Oh, yeah.
Stavi
What were you gonna say about immigrants? I'm sorry.
Lisa Trager
I was gonna say, what is it with immigrants luckying rocks, trees, bushes. Like nations love a picture next to a shrub.
Marie Faustin
It's like you can't. It just can't be used. So it's like, we'll get in front of the trees, but they're not smiling in front.
Lisa Trager
They're like this.
Stavi
I want to. Yeah, we didn't have a lot of. We didn't do a lot of wildlife photo. We weren't. We weren't out in the bushes personally.
Marie Faustin
No. What my dad would do when we would say, take a photo of how pretty this is, he'd be like, we'll buy a postcard. And then when we'd be at the shops, he'd be like, we're not buying a. We'll take a picture.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, that checks out just like me. For real.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Because now when I'll take pictures of stuff, when I'm out, I'll be like, you know, for the dump. The dump that I'm never gonna post. But also, like, sometimes as I'm taking it, I'm like, I'm not gonna do anything with this photo.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
My phone is. My phone has like 60, 000 photos on it that I'm never.
Stavi
And they're bad.
Lisa Trager
Or it's like multiples of the same thing. And it's like, why did I take three angles of this little fat statue?
Stavi
Well, this is good.
Marie Faustin
And there's. There's no more because we have family album. Like, do you guys have tons of albums?
Stavi
Yeah, we had albums. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, they would print them out. There was a little artfulness to them.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. There was more like, I can't wait to see and. But I wonder what will we do with the albums? I wonder. I'm curious when that time.
Lisa Trager
Leave them at my mom's house until.
Stavi
I kind of like it. It almost feels like. I feel like we should do albums because it makes you decide what is actually useful. What picture deserves to be printed and put in a little album. Yeah, but that's the best.
Lisa Trager
It was like going to CVS or wherever to pick up the.
Stavi
Oh, yeah. Waiting.
Lisa Trager
Forgot.
Marie Faustin
But waiting to see if they were cool.
Lisa Trager
And it's like your dad's thumb for, like. And you're like, okay.
Marie Faustin
In college, then I would scan them, and then I would make a Facebook album.
Stavi
Oh, wow. The snake eating its tail. I would snap. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
No, it was exciting.
Stavi
So when you. You have. You have. No, Basically you just remember being in Chicago.
Marie Faustin
Do you have any one memory during the, like, immigration process where I fell into, like, a fountain with koi. Like a koi pound fountain. So my first memory. Where was this of existence at the Mall. Either Vienna or, like, Italy, like, during our immigrant stops. But my first memory as a human is falling into a fountain.
Stavi
Being scared and cold and like. Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
And then I remember. Yeah. Then I was just like. Yeah. In Chicago.
Stavi
In Chicago. Yeah. We the. Were you the oldest or.
Marie Faustin
No, thank God. I had a sister 10 years older than me.
Stavi
Okay.
Lisa Trager
Years older.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
She's going through her adolescence now that are now.
Stavi
Actually now forties. Yeah. Oh, interesting.
Marie Faustin
She had to be so mature.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
She had to do all the paperwork, all the stuff. Got married young, kids young. So now she's, like, nice. Well, unfortunately, she's taken a liking to Imagine Dragons and.
Stavi
Oh, no.
Marie Faustin
She's been following.
Stavi
Oh, no. She's following Imagine Dragons on tour.
Marie Faustin
Like, it's like, four or five.
Stavi
Oh, no.
Marie Faustin
In different countries.
Stavi
Like the Grateful Dead. Your sister's Grateful Dead is Imagine Dragon.
Lisa Trager
She's a dragon head.
Stavi
Holy. That's awesome.
Marie Faustin
She's a dragon head.
Stavi
Respect. Is she. Is she, like, divorced? Is she.
Marie Faustin
No, her husband. She married her high school sweetheart. They love each other. They're going through this kind of switch. Oh, yeah. They're, like, cute. They go on these trips because I.
Stavi
Felt very divorced following the Imagine Dragons on.
Lisa Trager
Oh, no.
Marie Faustin
They're, like, loving it. The kids are a little older. They've created a really beautiful family and life for themselves. She quit her job of 15 years. He's, like, working still, but, like, nice. Yeah. They traveled.
Lisa Trager
She sounds like she's having the dream.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. We just start having a struggle because we're used to relying on her for everything.
Stavi
So now she's having a good time.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. Now she's like, I'm actually sick of being responsible for the whole family. And we're like, excuse me.
Stavi
We're gonna crumble.
Lisa Trager
But you know what it is? It's the. It's the.
Marie Faustin
She deserves it, but we would like her to get back in line.
Lisa Trager
It's the first daughter's job to, like, do the paperwork. Actually, I opted out of all of that. My younger sister is the person that's, like, doing all of that stuff.
Stavi
Wow. What a bum.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Stavi
Wait, what about your brother? Is he younger?
Lisa Trager
He's older, but they don't ask boys for nothing. They're just like, yeah, he can't really read that well, but that's my baby.
Stavi
Just put on. Yeah, just put on Dad's turquoise tuxedo and go to prom with the ruffle. The girls will handle the paperwork.
Caller
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
My brother just, like, kind of coasts through Respect Life. But my sister, my mom's, like, yeah, you gotta call the irs. You gotta call this person. You gotta. My dad's like, what does this word mean? And I'm like, whoo. I gotta go.
Stavi
That's interesting, because you stayed in New York. It's not like you move. Like, I just moved away.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Stavi
I was like, I'm not dealing with this because I was sort of. I was the oldest, and I definitely, when I was a kid, did all that. Like, I did a lot of translating. I did a lot of, like, writing letters and for my mom. And then I was like, I'm not doing this.
Lisa Trager
You retired?
Stavi
I really retired. And I thank God, went well, because now it's like, I could just send a. Now I could just send a nice little check home. Like, hey, I'm not gonna be around, but here's a little something.
Lisa Trager
And they love that.
Stavi
Oh, they love it. And then my brothers get to do all the. I feel bad for them because they're the ones around. They're the ones, you know.
Lisa Trager
Well, they should have ran away from home.
Stavi
They really should have. They should have accidentally gotten famous on the Internet. That's a lot better than having to do chores, having to take grandma to the doctor and like that. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Have you seen the Heidi Montag clip? Do you know that is Spencer from the Hills? So it's a journalist going. It's her go. Heidi going, yeah, I'd rather just be famous for being famous and make money than, like, have a job. And the woman's like, yeah, but isn't there honor? Like, I'd rather work at my family's restaurant. She goes, and that's your path. I loved it. People are like, on you, like, you're only doing this, and it's like, not working is the crack code to life or the cheat code to life. And if you could figure out a way.
Stavi
Sure.
Marie Faustin
To not fully fully work.
Stavi
Well, how's Heidi doing now, though? I don't know that it worked out for.
Marie Faustin
I'm sure she's doing cameos.
Lisa Trager
She worked bankruptcy.
Stavi
Pull up, Pull up. Heidi Montai cameo. Let's see what it costs.
Marie Faustin
Spencer's on a house of villains.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. No, he. I mean, he pretty much secluded and abused her for a while, but, damn.
Lisa Trager
They'Re still making it work.
Stavi
They. I don't see how to get one.
Marie Faustin
We don't see a price.
Stavi
She says follow for updates. What the.
Marie Faustin
No, I don't think it's a great life.
Eldest
I think I saw 99 on there.
Stavi
Okay.
Marie Faustin
All right.
Stavi
Okay.
Lisa Trager
You know what's so Crazy about cameo. They reached out to me years ago. Hey, you. Your personality is perfect for this. You just make videos when people pay you to shout them out. And I was like, gay. I'm not doing that. And then I woke up one day and it was like, congressmen are doing.
Stavi
Yeah. You're like, there's. This is pathetic. Who would. Yeah. Who would degrade themselves?
Lisa Trager
But how long have you been on it?
Marie Faustin
The pandemic is when I jumped on. Right.
Stavi
That got a lot of. It was only fans or cameo for a lot of people. Yeah. Videos. They're videos one way or the other. Is it.
Lisa Trager
Talking about somebody's birthday or.
Marie Faustin
You'Re reading my feet and boots and like low. Like, I did do a few. I just didn't have that high up. There was like four regulars.
Lisa Trager
How much did.
Stavi
Whoa.
Lisa Trager
How much was Ellen feet videos for?
Marie Faustin
It was fully in a boot, so I didn't care as much.
Lisa Trager
30.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, like, I didn't care.
Stavi
Wow. Some guy's paying for soft core feet porn. That's a. That's a level of horny. I'm not. I can't even think about.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, I just saw a moment of horny. Okay. So a girl that a guy asked her to put gummy candies in her socks, go running, and then put them in a bag and send them off. Oh, and I never felt like a sweat filled gummy candy.
Stavi
And he ate them. You think? Yeah. 100 without question.
Marie Faustin
Second option, you think he rubbed them, put them in your butt. Yeah.
Stavi
Okay. But yeah, I don't know about putting gummies in your butt. Seems like a problem.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, for sure.
Stavi
Maybe a smell. But yeah. Once you're asking for gummies, those are going in your mouth.
Lisa Trager
That's crazy. I'm thinking about the gummies I got in my purse right now.
Stavi
Yeah. How I'm thinking about how little I want gummies around anyone's feet. I just am not interested in fetish people.
Lisa Trager
Are like the original fetish people. I feel like they are unapologetically all about feet. They want them on their face, they want them on their balls. They want them every. When I was in high college, I met this guy that's that. It was like the first time I ever met a guy that had a foot fetish. I just had on flip flops. I came into the dorm, we're all hanging out. He. The way he was staring at my toes.
Stavi
Oh, no. It was like a. Like a. Like a horny stare. Oh.
Lisa Trager
It was like, hey, how you doing tonight?
Marie Faustin
They. They're crazy. Well, now, listen, you wouldn't do that to another fetish. Keep it together.
Stavi
Well, here's what I will say, right? And I'm not a feet guy, but if. If. If everyone's walking around with their titties out. Yeah, but I have a hard time. I'd have a hard time paying titties.
Marie Faustin
But you're not.
Stavi
But we're talking full titties out.
Lisa Trager
Full titties out.
Stavi
That would be. That's what toes. That's what sandals are to these guys. I'm just saying. And look, I'm not saying it's right. And I think they should acclimate, right? But if everyone had their titties out, no matter where I am, that you would catch me a couple. Couple. There'd be a couple moments of me being like, sorry, what were we talking about? You know, so these sick. And they are sickos, don't get me wrong. Although we are sex positive here. Just don't make a woman uncomfortable when you're looking at her feet.
Lisa Trager
I suppose just, like, pretend to drop something and be like, oh, gotta get these files. And then look at my job. Don't like, oh, you six feet.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Tall, and you're, like, looking all the way down at my.
Marie Faustin
That was.
Stavi
No, that's. That's bad.
Lisa Trager
Anyway, shout out to Josh.
Stavi
Yeah, shout out to Josh. She'd be like, oh, I think I got something. I think I got, like a popcorn kernel stuck in the back of my tooth. Hey, Marie, can you get this with your big toe, do you think?
Marie Faustin
I was wondering where this was going.
Stavi
I was wondering, you know, something subtle like that. You seem to have pretty sharp nails. You think? Raver. You get it with your big toe. Yeah, foot's a tough foot. Fetish is tough life.
Lisa Trager
I mean, said I will put my feet in someone's mouth.
Marie Faustin
Mouth.
Lisa Trager
But yeah, that's. That's because I'm a giver.
Stavi
Of course. Of course. And there's nothing wrong with that. But it's like getting super horned. I just don't get it. I don't understand what the. But I'm a simple guy. What can I say?
Lisa Trager
So titties is what's gonna get you.
Stavi
I'm a pretty down the middle, titties type of guy. Call me old fashioned. I like to see titties and asses and that sort of thing.
Lisa Trager
That's nice.
Stavi
What can I say? Yep.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Stavi
Not feet. I don't mind if. And I'm not mad at a nice foot. I'll be like, oh, nice.
Marie Faustin
Well, there's also a difference between, like, oh, while we're. If I get a foot in my mouth or in the mood in the.
Stavi
Mix if it happens, there's a difference.
Marie Faustin
Between that and if I don't see a foot, I'm not coming ever. Yeah.
Stavi
That I can't.
Marie Faustin
It's like a distinction. And then there's another maybe weird things I'm into, but I can have a plain day too.
Stavi
Sure, sure, sure.
Marie Faustin
But these guys.
Stavi
We can always have a turkey sandwich for lunch.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
It doesn't always have to be a. We don't have to go to Fogo the chow every day. Who else is talking about Fogo?
Marie Faustin
The channel's getting into our brains.
Stavi
Are people talking about it?
Lisa Trager
Has come up in conversation multiple times to me recently.
Stavi
Interesting. Maybe you're giving off a Fogo vibe because I haven't been talking about it. I'm a little hungry and I had steak earlier, so maybe that's steak for breakfast. I had steak and eggs, went to the gym early. Treated myself to steak and eggs as a little treat for getting the gym in.
Lisa Trager
You went to the gym and you said steak and eggs?
Stavi
Protein, baby.
Lisa Trager
Your peanut butter smoothies.
Marie Faustin
That's not fair.
Stavi
You need to understand, Marie, let me teach you about nutrition.
Lisa Trager
Please talk to me about this food pyramid, babe.
Marie Faustin
What's at the top? I love the food pyramid we grew up with. That's like so funny.
Stavi
Yeah. Completely wrong.
Marie Faustin
11 servings of bread is so funny. And they're like, you could have fruits and veggies, but as long as you're getting your cheese and meats in. No, the one to the left. I had a magnet. That black one, that cute one.
Stavi
I know that one.
Marie Faustin
We. We took a. A field trip to the grocery store in first grade.
Stavi
Whoa. Wow.
Lisa Trager
A field trip. That.
Stavi
That's broke ass school. Broke ass school alert. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Oh, I remember it vividly. I loved it.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. At the top, the kids need to oils and sweets. Milk and cheese and meat pe. Yeah. This is all six to 11 servings.
Marie Faustin
It's so funny. I mean, I love it, but it's just. I love that.
Stavi
I know.
Lisa Trager
And what is the new food pyramid? Cuz apparently this is only till 2005.
Stavi
I don't know.
Marie Faustin
The new one.
Lisa Trager
The new one is like, don't eat none of that stuff.
Stavi
Interesting. Who. Who did this? Who did the new one?
Lisa Trager
I'm gonna say Michelle Obama.
Stavi
Is it Michelle?
Lisa Trager
I don't know.
Stavi
I agree. That's what I was thinking too, but I was.
Lisa Trager
Well, it wasn't Melania.
Marie Faustin
Trump. Oh, is the meat in the bottom?
Stavi
Oh, hell yeah. Now we're talking. Okay, look at this. Bread is at the top.
Lisa Trager
Now red wine is on it.
Stavi
Now they got. Hold on a second.
Marie Faustin
Why is their feet in the middle?
Stavi
Did Josh set this up? It really is. There's shoes. There's gym shoes and feet as part of the pyramid next to salmon and broccoli.
Lisa Trager
Well, yeah, you got to put the feet the. The gummies with the feet, and that's what you eat at the.
Marie Faustin
I could eat a salmon avocado sushi roll every single day.
Stavi
I agree with you there.
Marie Faustin
It's my favorite.
Stavi
A perfect. One of the most perfect foods that exists.
Marie Faustin
An egg and cheese for day, a salmon avocado for lunch, and then a full cheeseburger for dinner.
Stavi
That. Lisa's food pyramid. I love that.
Marie Faustin
For me, it's dare I have. It's like half and half. I just. Dairy, dairy, dairy.
Stavi
You're a dare. You're a big dairy fan.
Marie Faustin
I want a bubble tea. I want cream in my coffee. I want a piece of cheese. Like, I am, like, dairy cottage cheese. If you get, like, a milk tea or, like, a matcha. But so I try to get the iced tea ones, actually. I love boba.
Lisa Trager
I'm a bougie oatmeal milk beach now. I'll be like, yeah, let me get it.
Marie Faustin
One person told me it's actually canola oil.
Stavi
Yeah. It's bad for you. It's over.
Lisa Trager
Well, I like cream. It's not gonna make me poop my pants.
Marie Faustin
I do have diarrhea every day.
Lisa Trager
I'm not gonna shark myself.
Stavi
Oh, well, not yet. Who knows?
Marie Faustin
Wait.
Lisa Trager
It's canola oil.
Marie Faustin
It's. Yeah. Jared Gold seems like it's oil. It's, like, slick and.
Stavi
Yeah. And it's got a lot of sugar added to it. I remember when they first came out. When they first came out, oat milk lattes. I'm like, oh, this is healthy. And then I had one every day, and then it's like. And then you. And then I watched them make it, and it's like the cup is, like, filled to here with milk, and that's, like, this much coffee. And you're like, I don't need to be drinking anything that much. But, yeah, I didn't grow up with half enough.
Marie Faustin
I always drink iced coffee. And then I finished mine. My friend was slow on hers. I'm like, can I have more of your coffee?
Stavi
And I went, what is this, new world?
Marie Faustin
What is this? I want to splash a half and Half. It's delicious.
Lisa Trager
It changed half and half. Is that like half cream, half water or something?
Stavi
Half cream, half milk.
Marie Faustin
It is decadent.
Stavi
It's good. It's creamy, as if you, if you put it in the blender, it literally becomes like whipped cream. That's how you get whipped cream. It's awesome.
Marie Faustin
But I like sour cream. Yeah. I like cottage cheese.
Stavi
I'm with you. I mean, that's some Ukrainian shit. Yeah. You know what I mean? That's where, you know, we can't fight farmers. We can't fight what our genes want sometimes, you know? Yeah.
Marie Faustin
You want, I want bread and butter with fish eggs every day.
Stavi
Now we're talking.
Lisa Trager
And you just eat it like this.
Stavi
Yeah. That's the other thing about moving to like a Greek neighborhood. It's like they have the types of.
Marie Faustin
Oh, I saw three inside out lambs on my way here.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah. Yes, absolutely. I get fresh lamb chops. Grill them up. All you could. I do.
Lisa Trager
Wow.
Stavi
I like cooking.
Lisa Trager
I like that fresh lamb chop. That's you. You should work at Fogo the child. You could absolutely drop off a resume.
Stavi
I would love, and legitimately, I would love to open up a, like, grill like a. When. When it's like as a retirement thing. Like, I'm the guy who grills up and then I also greet the customers.
Lisa Trager
You gonna be the chef? Remember the chef that went viral that.
Stavi
Was going like, no, I won't be doing any gimmicks, Marie. This will be just good food.
Marie Faustin
You won't.
Lisa Trager
You're not gonna slap the lamb on the ass. You're gonna be fingering at the.
Stavi
No, no, no frills. No frills. For me, folks, the winter time is a tough time to stay on your goals. Things, you know, it's harder to eat healthy, it's harder to keep things clean, keep your kitchen tidy. That's where our pals at Factor meals come in. Okay? These long, long nights, everything's dark. You only get so much sunlight. You don't want to be cooking all the time, cleaning your kitchen. You want delicious chef prepared meals. Dietitian approved that you are going to love the taste and the convenience. That's what you need right now in this time. In these trying times of the winter months, I'm hopping on the Factor train. I've loved Factor. I've had their meals throughout this year. And by the way, they're also cheaper than takeout and dining out. You get them right there. Put the money you save towards holiday shopping or reaching your financial goals, there's no sacrificing quality for convenience. With Factor, they got weekly menus that offer ways to treat yourself to restaurant quality meals. All types of shit. Okay, we're talking gourmet plus dishes that feature premium proteins and seasonal sides. Broccolini, leeks, asparagus. How does a truffle butter filet mignon sound, huh? Or a garlic herb roasted barmundi. Mouth watering, doesn't it? Well, here's what you're going to do. Head to FactorMeals.com 50staff and use code 50STAVI to get 50 off your first box plus free shipping. That's code 5 0s T A V V Y@FactorMeals.com 50STAVI to get 50 OFF your first box plus free shipping while your subscription is active.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, I'm gonna try this.
Stavi
Oh, yeah. Give us the Coke. Coke 00 sugar.
Marie Faustin
Oreo Ltd. Edition.
Stavi
Thank you. Do the nails thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There we go.
Lisa Trager
And it's cold, too.
Stavi
It's pretty good.
Lisa Trager
Now.
Marie Faustin
Oreo. I've been trying to get into food influencing. It's hard.
Stavi
Yeah. This. It's tough.
Marie Faustin
I don't know how many more things. Things to say. I'm like, yeah, it's fine.
Stavi
It's good. This burger's good.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. Because I tried the chicken Big Mac, you know, I had to.
Stavi
What's chicken Big Mac?
Marie Faustin
It's a big map with chicken.
Lisa Trager
Like ground chicken patties.
Marie Faustin
Like two patties.
Stavi
It's interesting. It's kind of crazy it took this long to get there. I know.
Marie Faustin
They won't even do a. A veggie one yet. It's really wild. McDonald's won't have a veggie burger.
Stavi
I think P. Everyone who's tried it just cook. Fails back all the time. Yeah. Like, they. Burger King had it for a while. That's gone.
Marie Faustin
No, Burger King's impossible.
Lisa Trager
It's still there.
Marie Faustin
Beloved with vegetarians.
Stavi
It's still there.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Oh, never. I take it back. Yeah. Other places have gone back. But here's the other thing, though, about Burger King's burger. You know why it tastes good? You think they're putting it on a different grill. That shit's got meat juices all over it. And vegetarians are like, holy. This is the best veggie patty I've ever head.
Lisa Trager
Tastes like meat.
Stavi
I mean, that's my hunch anyway.
Marie Faustin
You know, honest review. It tastes just like if you're on the freestyle machine.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
It tastes like a vanilla Diet Coke. So it's more just like a vanilla cream soda flavor.
Stavi
I Agree with you. I think it's got. I think it's got a little. If you give it a while. I think it's got a little cookie back end, but it's mostly vanilla. Vanilla. I like them. I do like that flavor.
Marie Faustin
You know what I'm into? Alip. Are you an ol. Do you. With that 9 grams of fiber in every can?
Stavi
I. It's in some. Isn't there some up with Ollipop? Now it's coming out. Oh, no. I think it's getting oat milked.
Lisa Trager
Every time they say something is good for us. It's actually crushed beetles in it or something.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's not a cure.
Marie Faustin
Do not drink it. Yeah.
Stavi
Do not drink Ollipop. Our soda.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. It's just. You're gonna. It's fine.
Stavi
Gas, I guess. You guess. Gassy bubbly.
Lisa Trager
I feel like you should be.
Marie Faustin
There's 9 grams of fiber, so. Yeah.
Stavi
Burping and F. The truth about healthy sodas. Are they really now? Now here's the other thing. Is this. Did Coca Cola pay for this article? You know what I mean? We can't trust anything anymore. All these sodas are often super expensive. Some claims they make. Blah, blah, blah. I don't recommend these sodas because we know that a very diet high in plant fibers, a gold standard for gut health. Why recommend a product whose benefits aren't conclusive? Oh, okay. So I should rather have a fucking salad than soda. No shit, dickhead. But is it better than us Coke? Whatever that doctor.
Marie Faustin
I'd rather have a grape soda with fiber than.
Lisa Trager
You know, salad is not always the safest thing.
Stavi
Sure.
Lisa Trager
You know how many bugs I found in salads? One time I was eating a salad, I was like, this is the best salad I've ever had.
Stavi
Oh, no. It was good too.
Lisa Trager
And you know when you're eating and you're like stirring it because you're like, let me get the dressing on everything.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
I get to the bottom of the salad, I'm like, what's that little piece of olive? I look and my brain will not focus, but I'm like, what? What is that?
Marie Faustin
What?
Lisa Trager
Anchovies. It was a bug with mad legs.
Stavi
Oh, no.
Lisa Trager
I was at work, right? And I was like, I have two options. I could be very demure about this and just throw this salad out the window. Or I could cause a scene.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
I started screaming. Everybody came running in. I was like, there's a bug in my salad. They're like, do you want us to go to Sweet Greens and get you a new one. No. Yeah, that's where the bugs live.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, that's the origin of the bug.
Lisa Trager
But most places when you go get a salad, like out at a restaurant, they don't rinse the leaves before they give you salad. You're just eating dirt.
Stavi
That's true. I don't rinse the leaves either though.
Marie Faustin
I don't know.
Eldest
If you get the pre chopped ones. They're like washed three times or whatever.
Lisa Trager
Y'all are disgusting. Get E Cola.
Marie Faustin
You're actually clean.
Lisa Trager
No, I mean I am, but yeah. You eating bugs.
Stavi
That's fine. Bugs. Bugs have a lot of protein.
Eldest
I got a bug in the sweet green and salad once at my old job too. See, it was like so sad. I was just like eating it at my desk because you don't, by the.
Stavi
Way, you don't want sweet green in your head. You were like, I'm doing the healthy thing. I'm not getting chick Fil A. So you're not pumped or I'm deluding myself.
Eldest
Like more Buffalo ranch.
Stavi
More Buffalo Ranch. A little more. Either way, you're not happy to begin.
Lisa Trager
With or you're adding an egg or adding whatever.
Eldest
I just saw some small little millipede something. It was small and gross. I was like picked it out, put it in my trash can and kept eating this thing.
Stavi
That's a. Yep. You're living in the real world. Unlike Marie who thinks she hasn't eaten bugs before. It's a part of life, Marie. Grow up.
Lisa Trager
It's a part of New York life for sure. I went to a. I went to a bodega once in Union Square, which is where I messed up. Cuz it was a delicatessen and I ordered a sandwich and I went to work to eat it on the roof. I stole somebody's juice out the fridge.
Stavi
I was like, what a. What a menace.
Marie Faustin
What a great deal.
Stavi
What a piece of. I'm eating chips. What kind of juice do you remember?
Lisa Trager
No, it was like one of those like sand Pellegrino. Like.
Stavi
Oh no, not orange. Like a. Yeah, that's a good one. That one have pissed me off if that went missing.
Lisa Trager
Out.
Stavi
What job was this?
Lisa Trager
I was temping at.
Stavi
Oh, temp. Yeah. There's no.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, I was temping at some model agency.
Stavi
Love it.
Lisa Trager
Where it was like all these like older people and gay people like being very mean to 12 and 13 year old models.
Stavi
Oh no, that sucks.
Lisa Trager
Good. Them fashion week is coming up. I want you to not eat any bread. Take the stairs no elevators.
Stavi
Oh my God.
Lisa Trager
This girl weighs seven pounds.
Stavi
All right, you know what? Good them take their S Pellegrinos.
Marie Faustin
Thank you.
Stavi
Take that old gay mean guy. San Pellegrino was like, this is a.
Lisa Trager
Grown ass man telling cuz most of the models that y'all see on runways and stuff, they're like 14.
Stavi
Jesus Christ.
Lisa Trager
They're really, really young.
Stavi
That's so weird.
Lisa Trager
So if you see a model that's so.
Stavi
That should just not be allowed.
Lisa Trager
But they're like, they have these like little.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, but the perverts are in charge of everything.
Stavi
But that's one of those ways that it's like, like when that becomes knowledge, we should stop doing that. You know what I mean?
Lisa Trager
Like, they still just want the clothes like it.
Marie Faustin
The perverts like it.
Lisa Trager
They want the clothes to hang off.
Marie Faustin
Goodbye. Perverts in charge are into it.
Stavi
You're right. But that sucks.
Lisa Trager
But the perverts are the designers, the photographers, the agents.
Stavi
Pervert up and down.
Marie Faustin
When people are like, not him. I'm like, where have you been? Like, it's so weird when people are shocked where they're like, it's all of them. This code. Yes, yeah, yes.
Stavi
That is true. Literally every women's gymnastics coach should probably go to jail.
Lisa Trager
Yes.
Stavi
Just there's maybe one good guy, you know, out of a hundred of them.
Marie Faustin
And he's gay.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. True.
Lisa Trager
He's good to the girls, but bad to the guys.
Marie Faustin
I mean, not to get serious, but yeah.
Stavi
Let's get. Let's get into it.
Marie Faustin
The big issue. It's not only the perverts, it's what you. It's like everyone that knows the receptionists that know the other teachers, the principal, everyone that hides it all for whatever reason. So it's like not only the bad guys, but then it's like a community of hush hushers that perpetuate it too.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
And not listen to the people.
Stavi
So there's no way we can stop this. We can go, we could take their San Pellegrinos. We can put bugs in their meals. What can we do to disrupt the.
Marie Faustin
I mean, legit violence and castration?
Stavi
All right, well, think about it. Put that. Yeah, put that down.
Marie Faustin
If you're against it, that means you're a pervert. Yeah, that's the thing. That's merch. We should put that on.
Lisa Trager
Socks and castration.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
It's a new dawn, baby.
Stavi
And here's the thing. I trust the American justice system to figure out the right people to Castrate, that's for sure. No, no, Marie, that's the.
Lisa Trager
American justice system. Lol. America's funny.
Stavi
So anyway, so you're. You're drinking a pedophile San Pellegrino. Go ahead, finish up.
Lisa Trager
San pedophile.
Stavi
San pedophino. You're having a San pedophino.
Lisa Trager
San pedophino. And I took a bite of the sandwich and I was like, oh my God, this is the best sandwich.
Stavi
No. Maybe you love bugs because the salad and the sandwich are both your favorite meal you've ever had. No.
Lisa Trager
Cause, you know, whatever it is, is. I'll wait until it's like, until I'm about to starve to death to eat. And then it's like, woo. This is the first thing I ate today.
Marie Faustin
Delicious.
Stavi
Gotcha. Gotcha.
Lisa Trager
Right? Being famished is like the flavor, if you will.
Stavi
Sure.
Lisa Trager
And so I'm eating it and then I FaceTimed my friend, right? I take another bite. I'm like, oh, right. My friend picks up. I look down right where my teeth marks.
Stavi
Oh no.
Lisa Trager
Right where my.
Stavi
No, no, no, no.
Lisa Trager
There's a bug laying on a tomato, like with the lettuce on top of it, like a duvet. And my friend was like, hello? And I was like, I gotta call you back.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
And I was like, what the. Like, yeah, truly. Like when I tell you, you know, you look down at the bread and it's like two little half moons. My. Right where my teeth ended. It was like his antenna was like.
Stavi
So they. You scraped the. The bug price scraped the top of your tooth?
Marie Faustin
Absolutely.
Stavi
But you didn't split them in half.
Lisa Trager
I threw them.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. You know what? You're like, we need to clean our veggies. We've not been eating all these bugs.
Stavi
That's possible. I am a quick eater of sandwiches. I don't do too much observing when I'm eating a sandwich. I do a lot of. I do a lot of devouring.
Lisa Trager
I threw the sandwich off the roof and I went back to the place and I said, there was a bug in my sandwich. They were like, do you want another sandwich? No, no. Give me my money back. Give me my $12 back.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah. That's gross.
Lisa Trager
I told my mom the story and she was like, you should have been like, I'm not leaving until you give me all the money in the register. I said, you wanted me to rob them.
Marie Faustin
The best was I went out to dinner with a friend. She needed to be gluten free. They didn't bring her gluten Free. She ate the bowl of pasta. Her hands expanded in front of our eyes.
Stavi
Full red King Charles. She went King Charles with it.
Marie Faustin
And they were like, we. We'll get you a free champagne. She's like, champagne hands are turned into.
Lisa Trager
Professor Cl.
Stavi
Wait, how do you take. How do you take that down? EpiPen or you just have to wait it out.
Marie Faustin
No, cuz it's not like a celiac is the full allergy, I think, you know, like, she obviously had an intolerance that was stronger than not, but it wasn't like, how do you say, Anaphylactic.
Stavi
Yeah, it's a tough one, but I respect that. You just said, I'm going to do my best. I'm going to do verbal spell check. I'm just going to throw it out there. Someone will know what I mean. That's. That's awesome.
Marie Faustin
But I hope I never am with someone that needs an epip.
Stavi
Scary seems pretty scary.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. You're the guy in Disney who died.
Stavi
His wife died, right?
Marie Faustin
Oh, no. I thought he died. And then they were like, you actually signed your rights away?
Stavi
Yeah, no, no, it is real. They tried it and there was such a huge back. So basically what happened is a guy's wife died. They. She. They were at Disney. They were at a restaurant, and she was like, insisting, like, hey, this doesn't have whatever she was allergic to. Right. Or else I'm going to die. And, yeah, she ate food with allergens at the Raglan Road Irish Pub and Restaurant at Disney World. I mean, tough to die in Disney World in Orlando, Florida. Place on earth is so up. But apparently they. Because he signed. He signed up for Disney Plus. They claimed that he couldn't. He waived his right to sue them. Now there was a huge backlash and everyone. And it probably would have gotten thrown out anyway, but this is what these companies are. They will try any bullshit thing. They don't care about you. They just don't want to have to.
Lisa Trager
Pay because he has Disney plus on his TV at home.
Stavi
Yeah, literally. That's what. They attempted to say that.
Marie Faustin
Because it's all true on BoJack Horseman, like, years ago. And it did come true. Like, they can legally kill you if you sign up for their certificate services, I guess.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, well, luckily I got somebody else's Disney plan.
Stavi
It's insane, though, man.
Lisa Trager
Disney is like a billion dollar corporation. Yeah, just give the man a couple shekels of.
Stavi
Yeah, you'd think so.
Marie Faustin
Think like that.
Stavi
No, they wouldn't be that. Well, they're pieces of. I mean, that's the problem with. Yeah. These giant companies.
Lisa Trager
He End up getting money.
Stavi
I don't know. They threw it out. I'm sure. I'm sure they probably settled because it was such a public backlash. But at some point, there won't be a public backlash, and they will attempt like that. But, you know, what are you gonna do?
Lisa Trager
Tick Tock is very powerful.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Like, if it's. They're trying to get the Menendez brothers out of jail. Every criminal, they're like, no, but he. I love his bang.
Marie Faustin
They did serve 30 years. I do understand.
Lisa Trager
We didn't serve 30 years.
Marie Faustin
This is true that. I mean, 25 to life. If they had good behavior, like, I. You know, some other criminals. I might not say that, but I feel if you committed the crime as a teen. But.
Stavi
And you got abused. Yeah. 30 years.
Lisa Trager
I mean, they did kill their parents. And then they were like, let's get some new cars. Like, it's like you could have waited a little bit.
Stavi
Sure. But that's a. That's a separate issue. Yeah. That's the murder.
Marie Faustin
And then you can't tell a victim how to act. Okay.
Stavi
He's mourning the loss of his father.
Marie Faustin
Killer.
Lisa Trager
I can't tell a victim, but I can tell a killer not to do that.
Stavi
Grief takes many forms, Marie. You don't know what these guys were up to, how sad they were. I do love that. You could just see them. They went to the Knicks games, courtside. Yeah. Those guys are. Shout out to the Menendez brothers, man. Free them.
Marie Faustin
I mean, I can't think of a killer that's not that big. That big of a bat, like. And we're back.
Stavi
Big comeback.
Marie Faustin
A big comeback for a killer. I've never seen it.
Lisa Trager
Where's the girl that just got out of jail for killing her mom?
Marie Faustin
Oh, you're right. Gypsy Rose.
Lisa Trager
Gypsy.
Marie Faustin
But we were on her side before she even went to jail.
Stavi
Gypsy's out there. She's doing great.
Lisa Trager
I think she's having a baby.
Stavi
It's like, I thought she broke up with the guy.
Lisa Trager
Well, she was a new guy.
Marie Faustin
Now who's hotter? It's like someone from her past. He's hotter than that other guy. Thank God.
Stavi
Gotcha. Gotcha. Gypsy's got a nice little glow up, too.
Marie Faustin
Yep.
Stavi
You know, she's gonna do. She's pregnant.
Lisa Trager
That's what I just said.
Stavi
But I thought you were making it up. I thought you were just riffing. I didn't know. She's literally pregnant. Immediately. Yeah. Announcer brings you with ex fiance turned new Boyfriend Ken Urker.
Lisa Trager
Baby's last name gonna be Urker.
Stavi
Yeah. Did I pretend? Did I mess up? Steve Urker. Did I mess up? Okay. Urker is the alleged father. We're already talk. We already got alleged.
Lisa Trager
Wait, they got the paternity test.
Stavi
Non invasive. She posted it.
Eldest
She posted it.
Stavi
She posted. She posted the grid. The paternity test. 99.9%. There's been a lot of chat around the paternity of our baby. While we've known for sure from the beginning, I feel that it's finally time to put the theories to rest. Wow. Ken is going to be an incredible dad. Let's see what Ken looks like. Pull up Ken's face.
Marie Faustin
Husband go up.
Stavi
But she was barely. That was the guy who held her down through prison.
Lisa Trager
The prison boo was never going to be as. As the fresh out of.
Stavi
You know, he was there because he was getting her ramen packets and whatever the.
Marie Faustin
Oh, he's like a normal looking guy, you know?
Stavi
Yeah. The other guy.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, he looked like Kevin Costner.
Stavi
He kind of does look like off brand Bruce Willis for real. But I wonder if it's because of the being bald and having sunglasses on. Okay, Gypsy.
Lisa Trager
I mean what kind of person is into somebody who kills somebody?
Stavi
Well, you know, it depends. A lot of lunatics. I mean number one, we're talking insane people.
Marie Faustin
But her mom really abused her.
Lisa Trager
Her mom, Was she forced to kill him? Her boyfriend sure was there when it went down. Like.
Marie Faustin
But her boyfriend was in his 20s. She was a teen. He is the one that listened to a teen and went and killed someone.
Stavi
It. I'm with Marie though. Like look, if you're eliminating people, it's like, you know what, there's a. What if there's a lady that's exactly like her that never masterminded her abusive mother's. No, he likes.
Marie Faustin
He wants to save her. I know for her not to bring it down again.
Stavi
Girl, we're talking about murder. Lisa has true crime brain right now. She really does.
Marie Faustin
The women who are really into the par and dating, it's usually abuse people, they. They like that they know where he's at. Like he can't leave, he can't ab. He can't come. So you actually overall feel safer because they're in jail.
Lisa Trager
Bundy.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, they're not.
Stavi
Yeah, he's not even hot.
Marie Faustin
It's so weird. But that was like the I'm a Richard Ramirez girl.
Lisa Trager
Richard Ramirez. Is that the Dating Game?
Stavi
That's the Night Stalker.
Marie Faustin
No, the Night Stalker.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
He's Crazy.
Stavi
Oh, he's. He is. He is kind of hot. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Of the killers.
Stavi
I. You know, but he is. But he really.
Marie Faustin
He had up teeth.
Stavi
He really, really.
Marie Faustin
But it was before DNA. He was like puking, jerking off in people's homes after killing him. And no patterns. It was like crazy.
Stavi
Oh, interesting.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
He is kind of cute.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he is.
Eldest
He's got a little Bushwick thing going. He's up in Ridgewood or something.
Stavi
He's got. Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Look like a tall Bushwick comic.
Marie Faustin
Did you guys see the doc? I think it was Netflix or Hulu, but it was. She worked in corrections for a long time. Fell in love with a guy.
Stavi
Yes.
Lisa Trager
The lady.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Interview.
Lisa Trager
Was it D. No, it was like a recent case.
Stavi
Really good. Just a good show about this different case.
Marie Faustin
But this woman, all of her colleagues and friends are like, he used her. This is disgusting. Like, we need to help her and all the. The criminals. Like, that's true love, man. I've never seen love that true.
Stavi
Well, there was a guy in Baltimore. Yeah, of course. Because to them that's the dream. That's like a Disney movie for a prisoner. That's.
Lisa Trager
That's.
Stavi
That's Prince Charming to him. To like a guy who's serving life. He's like, I get. And broken out of jail. That's awesome.
Lisa Trager
And she, like, she retired from her job and they. She told them like the day before she left.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
It's crazy. And then she might.
Stavi
It sounds like Escape from Dana Moore. Honestly.
Marie Faustin
I know.
Stavi
It's very similar.
Marie Faustin
Well, cuz there's SVU episodes based on all these.
Stavi
Sure, sure, sure, sure.
Marie Faustin
Okay.
Stavi
I, I'm. I. I'll defer to you on this one.
Lisa Trager
I just watched the Martha Stewart documentary and she cheated on her husband twice. And she was like. It wasn't emotional. It was just. It was just a beautiful day.
Marie Faustin
She's a badass. She's truly emerged as, like, she is cool.
Stavi
But she was also knock. She was such a piece of ass that it's like you probably let her get a couple.
Lisa Trager
I mean, I didn't let it go. She started out hot. She was like a model all the time. She was a model and then a stockbroker and then.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
And then a housewife and then she had a daughter that she never hugged.
Stavi
Like.
Lisa Trager
And then she went to jail.
Stavi
Yeah. She got stitched on by her best friend. It'd be like, if eldest stitched on me. You know I'd kill you, right, Elvis? If you ever. If you ever Flipped on me, you know, I'd have.
Eldest
I have to eliminate you say the same thing. Watch your back.
Stavi
You know, I have to eliminate you, man.
Lisa Trager
But then everybody was saying that she was also, like, a terrible person to work for. She.
Stavi
Yeah, probably.
Marie Faustin
Oh, yeah, I know someone works for her. Yeah.
Stavi
Someone that hot.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, she's a. Or no. That she came to their office for a meeting. Yeah, that's what it was for, my friend. But if. If you're hot, rich, good at tablescapes, you're going to be.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nothing about Martha Stewart says nice to waitresses. There's not a single element of her that says, like, the.
Lisa Trager
To be like, why would you garnish it like this?
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
And you're like, she's the true devil wears product. To me, for sure, she would look us up.
Stavi
I agree with that.
Lisa Trager
Well, who you think would win in a celebrity death match? Martha Stewart or Anna Wintour?
Stavi
Oh, wow.
Marie Faustin
Fighting physical Martha. It's a felon.
Stavi
Yeah, but she was in. She was in white collar jail.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, she was.
Stavi
They had tennis courts.
Lisa Trager
They were mean to her.
Marie Faustin
Martha East. I don't.
Stavi
Oh, you saw the. You saw. Saw the document. I didn't see that.
Lisa Trager
Mean to her.
Stavi
Yeah. Okay, cupcake. Interesting. Well, I don't know.
Marie Faustin
They were just on Watch what happens live. Snoop Dogg and someone else. And then Martha was bartending on Watch what happens live and Ina garden talk about Martha Stewart in the book. And they talked about it. And Snoop had her back, like, in such a real way. I think their friendship. Is their friendship legit?
Stavi
They look. Yeah, that's a good friendship.
Marie Faustin
That's cool.
Lisa Trager
You know, they met on the roast of Justin Bieber.
Marie Faustin
I didn't know that.
Lisa Trager
I learned it.
Stavi
And they just hit it off.
Lisa Trager
He was. She said he was chain smoking blunts next to her for 12 hours. And they just formed a friendship. I said, yeah, girl, you was hot.
Stavi
That's beautiful, man. That's beautiful. I love that. Well, look, we could talk about who's a and who killed who all we want, but, you know, we have serious work to do, girls.
Marie Faustin
Let's not forget this is a thrill. I'm so.
Stavi
We have a lot of people to help here.
Marie Faustin
I've never done a pod with this nice of a big screen.
Stavi
We can look. We try and really get it.
Lisa Trager
This is professional.
Stavi
We. We try and see it on the intern.
Marie Faustin
I see this part on the Internet.
Stavi
Yes, yes, yes.
Marie Faustin
I never see this. It's nice.
Stavi
So much goes into this stupid podcast. And so we have a couple. We're going to do some questions here.
Lisa Trager
Nine.
Marie Faustin
50 cords.
Stavi
50 cords. A lot of cords. Lot of cords. Three cams. Nice lighting setup, folks.
Lisa Trager
Truly like this. This little soft basket, like.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you'll never see it, folks. You'll never know what they're talking about. So let's do anything to plug here in the midway point of the show, girls. Anything you want to say when I'm.
Marie Faustin
On the road, please come see me.
Stavi
Love it.
Marie Faustin
Where can they find you Glitter cheese online? I have a link tree and then I have a podcast called that's messed Up. An SVU podcast?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
But mostly on the road is Glitter Cheese.
Stavi
Cool.
Marie Faustin
Oh, I have a Netflix special. It's coming out, but I don't know. March, I think.
Stavi
All right, In March.
Marie Faustin
Thank you.
Lisa Trager
I love that you forgot about the special. That's Messed Up.
Stavi
Marie, anything for you.
Lisa Trager
I have a podcast called Mess.
Stavi
Oh, yes, yes.
Lisa Trager
Where? I mean, honestly, the people who send stuff to Stavros would be perfect for my podcast because y'all are all a mess.
Stavi
And you're doing it with Sydney.
Lisa Trager
With Sydney Washington.
Stavi
Two favorites of the show, folks. Go. Have you guys done this show together?
Lisa Trager
No.
Marie Faustin
It would be too powerful.
Stavi
You got to come back and do it together.
Lisa Trager
It'd be very well moisturized.
Stavi
Yeah, Yeah, I would love it. That is one of my favorite. It's you2 versus it's one of them.
Marie Faustin
Faith.
Stavi
My favorite things is to go back and forth with YouTube because it's such a challenge.
Lisa Trager
Because it's like Sydney and I like, boost each other.
Stavi
And I got fucking Elvis over here. I'm fucked. It's just me. There's no way he's going.
Marie Faustin
Sherry and Terry from the Simpsons, the sis, the twins, the two purple hair girls.
Stavi
Yeah, I thought you meant Patty.
Lisa Trager
And I'm like, damn, girl, do I sound that bad?
Marie Faustin
Char, of course, Fashion.
Lisa Trager
The mean girls with the bangs. Oh, yeah, yeah, that's us.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Not the chain smoking middle aged DMV employees.
Stavi
Go listen to the pod.
Marie Faustin
Max, did you see for Halloween a guy that worked at the DMV dressed as the sloth from Zootopia?
Stavi
Oh, that's awesome.
Marie Faustin
That's nice.
Stavi
Good one. Little self awareness. Never heard the dmv. We could use a little more of that, folks.
Marie Faustin
But also your plug or fun live show.
Lisa Trager
Oh, yeah. Thank you, friend. I host a dating game show. It's called why are you single? The next one is December 11th. I don't know when this is coming out.
Stavi
Okay, Probably I think it would just have happened it might be two days before your shows.
Eldest
Well, if you were there, I think it's December 9th.
Lisa Trager
Nice.
Stavi
We'll see. Let's not promise anything. Things get shuffled all the time.
Lisa Trager
Marie, Listen, January going to sell out.
Stavi
There'll be 100 gay guys there whether we post it or not.
Lisa Trager
100 gay guys and seven straight girls.
Marie Faustin
When is. When straight men are alone at my shows, I'm always so. Like, what. They usually saw me on Bennington, you know, but, like, it is. It is such a low. I always get really, like.
Lisa Trager
It's very jarring for me as well.
Stavi
Oh, that's. Yeah, that's how I feel. When straight women come to my.
Lisa Trager
No, when straight women come to your show, you're like, oh, they trying to bang me.
Stavi
Yeah. But they come solo. They're crazy. You know what I mean? Usually straight women, they come are with, like, boyfriends.
Marie Faustin
Got it. And then they want to cheat on their boyfriends.
Stavi
That. Which I'm open to, but, like, if it was like a group of. Of, like four friend, like, girls, like, which happens. Which is starting to happen more. That is how I feel. Like, what you guys would describe. I'm like, oh, cool. That's sick. That just, like, you know you're coming to see me. Yeah.
Lisa Trager
I was in Seattle and these guys came and they were like, cute. And I was like, are they. Are they gay? Yeah, they were all straight. And I was like, who are y'all with?
Marie Faustin
Your gay cousin?
Lisa Trager
Is this one girl with y'all?
Marie Faustin
The person who set this up?
Lisa Trager
No, know. She had. She didn't even know who I was. It was this guy that was like, me. I'm a big fan. I was like, ah, he gonna kill me tonight.
Stavi
Well, and then in 10 years, Lisa will say she should get out of jail.
Lisa Trager
That's messed up.
Marie Faustin
And he said, recently there was a man moaning, and so he had to be asked to leave.
Lisa Trager
He was moaning at your show?
Marie Faustin
Well, then I didn't know if I heard. I go, is there moaning?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
And then there's was a scuffle.
Stavi
Oh, scuffle.
Lisa Trager
His dick was out.
Marie Faustin
I don't think so. But the girls in front said, thank you so much. He was. He was moaning a lot.
Stavi
Oh, no. That sucks.
Marie Faustin
He was there with his dad. It was weird. It was his dad's birthday.
Stavi
What the. Yeah, nothing.
Lisa Trager
Did dad get kicked out, too?
Stavi
Yeah, the dad stuck around.
Lisa Trager
Finish the moment.
Marie Faustin
My favorite. I love when a drunk gets kicked out and the friend or boyfriend.
Stavi
I love that.
Marie Faustin
I really enjoy that.
Stavi
I love, love that Too. That's awesome.
Marie Faustin
I'm like, I hate her, too.
Stavi
Well, maybe we have some dumb calling in. Let's see what we have here. Eldest.
Caller
Hi, Stavi. First of all, I love you.
Stavi
Thank you.
Caller
Hello, eldest. So my name is Savannah. I'm recently engaged, and I'm obviously, like, already planning the wedding stuff. And I'm also thinking a lot about, like, my bridal party, who I want there. And I have a lot of friends who I love from, like, different stages of my life, and they all get along well, or I think they will get along well if they haven't met yet. Except for two of my friends who they're really close. They're my really close friends. I met them during college, and during that time, we were, like, best friends. We lived together for a few years. But the thing is, they're kind of, like, socially awkward, and they don't really like going out or partying. And I honestly kind of feel like they're sort of condescending towards my other friends.
Stavi
Oh, damn.
Caller
Who do like to have a little bit more fun, but also, like, you know, we still spend time together, and they've been there for me through some, like, really hard times in my life.
Stavi
Okay.
Caller
And I know also that they expect to be in my bridal party because of, like. Like, things that they've said to me recently.
Stavi
Ooh.
Caller
So my question is, should I have these girls be in my bridal party? Because, like, I think they would be really, like, organized. They would have heartfelt speeches at the actual wedding. But I also think they would ruin the vibe of the bridal shower and, like, the bachelorette trip. But then I'm like, is it like, superficial to even care or to, like, prioritize those events?
Stavi
No.
Caller
And my ability to have fun partying in Nashville over the actual wedding.
Stavi
Nashville is a little too.
Caller
I know that, like, if they didn't get invited, they would get upset, and it would be bad for the friendship, which is important to me. So what should I do? Thank you.
Marie Faustin
Love you.
Stavi
Love this question. Love this question. I think we can really figure this out for that for her for sure.
Marie Faustin
So I was. I've only been in one wedding outside of my sisters, and.
Stavi
Oh, wow.
Marie Faustin
She mishmashed a lot of different energies. And there's one person she wasn't really that close to but felt like she had to. They were kicked out after the bachelorette party and were disinvited from the wedding.
Stavi
Wow.
Marie Faustin
And while we were at the wedding without this person, we did feel like, thank God this person's not here. Like, she would have been a bummer Summer. But also, you don't. I think these girls can go on the Bachelor. Oh, they're gonna ruin the vibe.
Lisa Trager
Well, they're gonna ruin the vibe, but she doesn't want them to do it. But they're gonna organize, so they're gonna keep everybody on top of their.
Stavi
And I will say that is important because these trips and these like. Like that, you don't want to type.
Marie Faustin
It, but you don't want someone that's so bossy. And I. Because if they're also condescending, you don't want someone too organized.
Lisa Trager
I think you gotta invite one.
Stavi
You can't. You can't split up. You can't. That's insane. You can't split them up.
Caller
Friend.
Lisa Trager
Friend.
Stavi
Whoever can't split them up, whoever looks.
Lisa Trager
Cuter and is gonna get the most likes on Facebook can be in the bridal party.
Marie Faustin
I think it's not about the bride, but I think for the trips. Yes. Invite your friends for the day of wedding, you're getting dressed, you want just the people that are going to make you feel at ease, be able to center you. Like, like, really be there for you. You don't want to have to be on edge on your wedding. But I think for the trips and vacations, it's like you can have a Daria and Jane in the corner. It's fine.
Stavi
Yeah, you can. I will. So, yes, I have. The general thing I'll say is that this is your wedding, this is your whatever. And if for some reason deep in your soul, you're like, I don't want these people there, then that means you probably also. And if that might ruin the friendship, that might mean you don't want the friendship. If you actually like these people to that extent, you would want them there. Or maybe you have different ideas of how good of friends you are and it's not worth. You never want to feel like you're doing somebody else a favor at your fucking wedding.
Lisa Trager
Right.
Stavi
It's about you. It's not about fucking them. And so, like, I know people who have invited. Maybe they were like work people or. Or somebody. Some like, in law type of thing. And they did fuck the vibe up. Now, having said that, if this is just that, you have two friends who. They do sound like her good friends. Like she said, they went through a lot of stuff together. They helped her get through stuff. They were college friends. And yeah, maybe they're like. You're saying Daria. Maybe they're like a little Maybe they're like. They're like, not as fun if they're a little lame, but they're still your good friends and you do actually care about them. And I know what you're saying about the type A thing. As long as they're not like type A, but they are just organized because that's also important. I've been to bachelor parties where no one's in charge and it sucks. Yeah. So I'm just saying.
Marie Faustin
Condescending to everyone, but they're probably the.
Lisa Trager
Ones that are going to be like, I'm going to go back to the room and lay down early and.
Stavi
And sure. But here's the thing. Will that ruin the vibers? I just like, okay, great. See you.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, later.
Stavi
So you have to decide side. Are they just not as fun? But that's not a big deal because they'll just go sleep early.
Marie Faustin
Do they love you? Do they care about you? Do they want you to have the best time? Are they willing to put their on hold?
Lisa Trager
Are they going to stress you out on the day of the wedding or are they going to get you together?
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
I say. I still say split them up.
Stavi
That's truly the worst possible thing you can do.
Lisa Trager
Come to the wedding. And one can come. Ones in Nashville and ones at the, you know, standing at the pulpit or whatever.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Weird to me.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
It is family only. I just can't imagine being forced to do. Like, I think I have good friends. Even the wedding I was in, I was not expected to be at the bridal shower.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
You know, it was a little more normal.
Stavi
I know. You mean certain people have different. Like. I know people who, like Greek people are kind of have it as a bigger thing. Like, it is more of a, like, whoever the, like, dudes are there. Like, it's kind of like just a party where you get gifts and it's kind of not, you know, you invite everyone. But I know other people who. And I've. I've known like when a Greek guy marries like some. An American girl and she wants it, like what you're saying, where it's like really tight knit. Just. And it's like, you know, okay, it's. But ultimately, you know what it is? It's whatever the fucking bride wants. And that's what we. That's what we keep. I think we're going to keep coming back to with this question. You have to decide ultimately, you have to take a honest, like, inventory of their pros and cons and how they make you feel and not you Feel.
Marie Faustin
Yes. Not how you're going to make them feel.
Lisa Trager
Not how they're going to make everybody else feel and.
Stavi
And do that. And. Exactly. Just you. Not about what it's going to affect them, whatever. And then decide if they're fucking.
Marie Faustin
My comedy special I had to make.
Stavi
I.
Marie Faustin
They. I didn't want a few people there because of how they behaved.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
And it was upsetting to them.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
But I didn't give a.
Stavi
Of course.
Marie Faustin
It's my big professional moment. I don't trust you.
Stavi
Of course.
Lisa Trager
Here's my thing about it as well, is, does the bridal party need to be massive? Can't you just be, like, up. It's just my sister and my cousin. Like, sure, you can make it smaller so that they're not part of the wedding, but I could have a different.
Marie Faustin
Thing because I think people go to the bachelorette trip that aren't in the bridal party. Or am I wrong? So, yeah, that's why I keep saying, like, the trips are one thing, but the bridal party, you shouldn't be for, like.
Stavi
No. And if someone has an issue with only being in the trip and not being in the bridal party, that they're a. Like, they're a dumb. Yeah. Like. Like, and you might not. But, you know, also, our caller, our friend here sounds like a bit of an anxious person, so there could be a little bit of getting worried about something that's not an issue. Like that, you know, like, worried about.
Lisa Trager
Like, she didn't even want to get to the question. She was like, yeah. You know, like, I don't know.
Marie Faustin
I also want to know what they're saying to her to make it seem like they're so entitled to being a part of it.
Stavi
Well, they're probably like, oh, it's good.
Lisa Trager
I gotta save. I gotta lose this weight for the wedding.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah. Like, it's gonna be so fun. Like, oh, I can't wait for the. You know, just like that. Where they just assume they're in.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Stavi
Which. That might annoy me too. Like, what are you fucking. You're not making. That's also a tactic of people that want to guilt you a little bit.
Lisa Trager
100%.
Stavi
But what you have to think about is, are they trying to guilt you or do they really love you and are excited? Because that's. And by the way, if you just think. I will say if their biggest sin is that they're not that fun, that's not a big deal. But if they're. If it's. If it goes beyond they're not fun and they will ruin your fun. That's the problem. If they're just kind of lame and they're gonna. You know.
Marie Faustin
But also, I really believe in, like, how often do you see these people? Or is this someone that you just know from college and you see them once a year when you all go home for Thanksgiving, then they are not entitled to all this. Like, sure, that's a great, really lovely relationships with people you've known for a long time. But it should be about from afar.
Stavi
This.
Marie Faustin
These are my buds that I hang out with every day. This is what I'm calling when something good or bad happens. Like, that's who you want around you. Like, right. What's the. What's the word?
Stavi
Of.
Marie Faustin
Of, like, when you feel like you have to do something.
Lisa Trager
Obligation.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. Like, it seems like are you obligated just because you known them for 20 years?
Stavi
That doesn't matter. That's the thing we're trying to tell.
Marie Faustin
You is like, you see all the time. It's who makes you feel good.
Stavi
Yeah, it's. And yeah. And by the way, there is possible that.
Marie Faustin
But it's okay if you have a loser. Maybe these loser actually, because the bachelor party I went on, there was one enemy that, you know, ended up getting kicked out. But I. Another enemy emerged for me. You don't. You don't know who will actually fail.
Lisa Trager
That's the thing about girls.
Stavi
And some people rise to the occasion too. They might even be like, it's your. I'm not usually like this, but let's do some lines and get up. They might do that. You never know.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
You're so focused on that. You don't know who will disappoint.
Stavi
I agree with you, but that's the.
Lisa Trager
That's the risk that you take with girls trips is, you know, you got.
Marie Faustin
A lot of different.
Stavi
You got a lot of person interesting. Oh, that's good. I'd love to talk about this. Usually you gonna come back.
Lisa Trager
Some of y'all not gonna be friends.
Stavi
All right. We got something to talk about when the mics turn off.
Lisa Trager
Nah, I did take a girls trip. It was 10 days. That's too many days.
Stavi
Too many days.
Lisa Trager
That's on you likes women that much?
Stavi
No. No.
Lisa Trager
Ten days.
Stavi
No, absolutely. That's too many. It's too much. But, yeah, do an honest assessment. And ultimately it's what you want.
Marie Faustin
And it's your what? Yeah. You want to feel free, happy, joyful?
Stavi
Absolutely.
Lisa Trager
Yeah. Bring shrooms to the wedding.
Marie Faustin
Stress. Yeah.
Stavi
I have done Shrooms at a wedding. It was pretty fun. Yeah. I was sober at the time. I was like, well, this doesn't count. This isn't weed or booze. I could do mushrooms. Horrible idea, but it was fun.
Lisa Trager
I know a couple that did Molly and passed out Molly at their wedding.
Stavi
That's fun.
Marie Faustin
I do too.
Stavi
I respect that. Yeah. Yeah. All right, well, now it's time for a special segment. Let's take these cans and put them on the floor. Put them outside of the. Just put those. Just put those liquid death cans. Put those down for me, if you can.
Marie Faustin
Just.
Eldest
On the ground.
Stavi
It's time. Oh, where are we, eldest? Holy shit. Wow. It's time for the twist, twisted T segment. The keep it twisted, twisted segment of the. We haven't named it yet. We don't really know what it's gonna be called.
Lisa Trager
Just the twisted cold.
Stavi
They're not cold. We got cold ones in there if you want. Yeah, we can. We got cold ones. Elvis can get you one.
Lisa Trager
Okay, cool.
Stavi
If anybody wants free game, what flavor would you like, Lisa?
Marie Faustin
Peach sounds like the best.
Stavi
I'll just get our guest a peach and play this.
Lisa Trager
Play the.
Marie Faustin
Have you had this? Which one's?
Stavi
I like the peach. I'll do a peach original, but, yeah, they're all good.
Lisa Trager
I'll do a peach or raspberry or something.
Eldest
They're all delicious.
Marie Faustin
That's twisty. I just had a peach or half and half. Surprise me.
Stavi
Surprise them.
Marie Faustin
There's no raspberry.
Stavi
Play the question. So here we have our twisted keep it twisted question of the episode. Elis, go ahead and play it for us.
Caller
Hi, Savi and guest, Long time listener. So my question is, I'm sort of the breadwinner of my relationship. Like, I make a lot more money than my husband, and my husband is in a bit of credit card debt. Not that he's financially irresponsible. He invests most of his money, and then he works part time.
Stavi
Okay. Sounds like.
Caller
Like to take care of our dog.
Marie Faustin
Thank you.
Caller
And I recently got an increase of pay, so I make even more money.
Stavi
Nice.
Caller
And I was debating whether or not I should pay off some of his debts for him. The way our financial situation works is that we just pretty much go half on everything, so it's very even. But I feel like, because he's at least good with his investments and with his money overall, that if I pay some of his bets, he might be able to invest us more.
Stavi
Interesting.
Caller
And just kind of feel at ease. Good idea or bad idea?
Stavi
Interesting. The breadwinner this is. This is kind of a. I mean, she's not really keeping it that twisted. She's keeping it pretty responsible, to be honest with you.
Marie Faustin
I thought she was gonna say I'm.
Lisa Trager
The bread winner, but hit me.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just kind of a. Interesting question that we can answer. But hey, eldest chose the keep it twisted. Twisted question of the. So let's keep it. Keep it. Let's keep it twisted for our friend here and breadwinner. Okay. So what I'm interested in is she says he's not financially responsible, but he's in credit card debt and he's invested and he also works part time. I know full time for sure.
Marie Faustin
And I don't like any of that. But it says they pretty much go half on everything. So as long as they're like he is contributing evenly, I like, I enjoy that.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, but how are they pretty much going half on everything?
Marie Faustin
Like, I'm sure he comes from money investments. What are you talking about?
Lisa Trager
I thought that was crypto.
Stavi
I don't think. Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
Well, you know, the trust fund kids, they only get a certain amount a month and then they still.
Stavi
They can't debt though.
Lisa Trager
But the debt is not giving, Rich.
Marie Faustin
No, you're right.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. The part time and also part time and takes care of our dogs. Interesting.
Marie Faustin
Is he. He better be doing a one more chore.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Needs to be another chore.
Stavi
Maybe he's keep it twisted.
Eldest
Keeping it twisted.
Stavi
He's keeping it twisted. Not kind of clumsy there, Elvis, but.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, it was a little clumsy.
Marie Faustin
I am having a work in progress, but this does taste like a peach ring.
Stavi
It's delicious. They're so good. They're legitimately so good. So I want to try.
Marie Faustin
This is my thing.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
If you're life partners, you should want to build something together. Like in my romantic mind, it's like, yeah, pay off your partner's debt. You're in this for life. Like pay it off off. Do a plan. Make sure it doesn't happen. You know, you got a set of debt.
Stavi
Yes.
Marie Faustin
But you're together, so you're in it forever. Do it.
Stavi
I agree.
Marie Faustin
But then the other side of my brain is like, is he trash? Is he a man? Oh, is he going to take your money? Is he use. Is he not going to be responsible in the future? What's going on here?
Stavi
Right.
Marie Faustin
So that's the back of my brain too. But really I'm just like you pay off your husband and wife.
Stavi
I'm with you in. In philosophically. Where it's like, yes, you're in this together forever. And the only thing that gives me pause is what are these investments? Is it crypto? Like, is it some weird.
Lisa Trager
He bought that monkey. Nft.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that what it is? And then also the part time. Working part time to take care of your dogs. Like, is that something you want? Are you. Do you really love your dog?
Marie Faustin
Maybe they're fostering, but either way, who's.
Stavi
Here's what I'll say.
Marie Faustin
Because Howard Stern's wife, you know, she. She takes care.
Lisa Trager
Wife.
Stavi
Yeah. I mean, maybe she's the Howard W.
Lisa Trager
Howard Stern made his wife.
Stavi
Yeah. Howard would be keeping it very twisted to make his wife get a job.
Marie Faustin
Keep it twisted.
Stavi
Which is, I guess, is a good thing, now that I think about it. We love keeping it twisted.
Lisa Trager
I need to know how much credit card debt he's in. Is it $10,000, right? Is it 40,000? Can you have 40,000?
Stavi
You can. You certainly.
Marie Faustin
You could have hundreds.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
Like, what is it that.
Stavi
Yeah, and. And I guess, like, yeah, I want to know a little bit more about.
Marie Faustin
Was it college debt? And he hasn't. Because then if.
Stavi
Credit cards. She said credit cards.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, but maybe like, you know, like, was he young? Is it constant? Did he like, go to the World cup one year and it's never been able to pay it off?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
But then it's like work to pay it off, right?
Lisa Trager
What is this, part time? Yeah, that's what's twisted.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
You ain't got no money and you ain't got no job.
Stavi
You only have half a job, but.
Lisa Trager
Then you take care of the dogs. Like, do the dogs have an Instagram that's popping?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you getting free Purina out of this at least? Is your dog. Do you have a. An Irish setter that's an influencer?
Lisa Trager
Do you have a dog that looks like it has like a raised eyebrow?
Stavi
So, okay, I think ultimately here's what we're going to say to this to our friend here about whether she should keep. How twisted she should keep it. I think if. Because she obviously believes in this guy, right? She clearly, you can tell that she's on his side, which is good. But you have to think about should you be on his side. Are these sound investments? What are they day? Why does he have the debt? You said he's not financially responsible, but really take a look as if you're not his wife. Take an objective look at this and say, talk to your friends. Talk to friends.
Marie Faustin
Your meanest friend.
Stavi
Yeah. Absolutely. That's a great.
Lisa Trager
This is why I'm here.
Stavi
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
I think you need to call Charles Schwab. Figure out what the, like what the success rate of these investments are because maybe he's about to make a bunch of money.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Or maybe he's about to lose more.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
And then decide if you want to pay the debts off or not. And then that way you'll be covered when he's rich.
Stavi
Yeah. And like if the part time thing is something because that's better for both of you. But if he's like gaslit you into thinking part. He, you know, part time job is smart. Oh, it's so hard to care for the dogs. If he really could be working full time and he's not and if he really could be paying off his own debt but instead he's convinced dogecoin is going to fucking. Is going to save everything.
Marie Faustin
We need to know if he's cooking dinner, cleaning.
Stavi
Yeah. What else are you doing?
Marie Faustin
What are the stay at home duties of this part time man?
Stavi
If everything is truly feeling 50. 50.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
And she clearly believes him, she clearly loves him, then I think I agree with what you said at first, Liza, where it's like when you're in a. When you're married to someone, this is it. That's the whole point is that you can really trust them and you're building a life together. It's okay to pay off some of his debt for sure. But if not, if there's any red flags about what he's doing financially or not, it's the amount.
Marie Faustin
It's Marie saying, so you pay off his $40,000 in debt and then he leaves you.
Stavi
The amount is.
Lisa Trager
But there are red flags because she's not sure. She's like, is this a guy there or is this a bad idea? Like she's. She enlisted all this. The red flag already there.
Stavi
I also think though that could just be. It's also a very American thing of like money is personal and like, like in a. I mean I've p. I mean obviously my life's gone good and I've been able to pay off family debt. And I didn't think about it for a second second. But there's people who would just think philosophically, is it right to pay off debtors? Everybody out on their own. Kind of weird American capitalist.
Marie Faustin
He's a libertarian. Don't help him.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that might.
Marie Faustin
For who did he vote for?
Stavi
That is true.
Marie Faustin
Depending on who he voted for.
Stavi
How twisted did he keep it in the ballot box?
Lisa Trager
Not yours.
Marie Faustin
That's the name of personal responsibility.
Stavi
So yeah, if this is simply wondering about whether you should pay off, like you can. If is actually going good, but you have to really be honest with yourself. And I think ask your meanest friend is a great way to look at it because they'll tell you, you know what I mean? If any. If there's any red flags, they will sniff them out and they already have.
Lisa Trager
An opinion about him, so they're ready to go ask.
Stavi
And by the way, if they're like, yeah, I guess you should pay it off, that's a great sign. Cuz they don't like him. But it is a good idea, you know what I mean?
Marie Faustin
Do you ever get follow ups from people like hard. I need to know what I know.
Stavi
We'd love to know. And that is the keep it twisted, twisted question. I don't want to know.
Lisa Trager
I want another.
Marie Faustin
A real twisted wish.
Stavi
Yeah, we'll. We get. We'll get plenty of them. This is just what they're paying for. All right, very nice. We just kept it twisted.
Marie Faustin
I like this.
Lisa Trager
That was the twisted shimmy.
Stavi
The official twisted shimmy.
Marie Faustin
I can't believe I'm wearing this sweater to a concert.
Lisa Trager
Like, we have to get you a tank top of. Borrow one of Stavi's blouses and tie it around your waist.
Stavi
Yeah, I could get you a blouse.
Marie Faustin
I'll buy something at the concert.
Stavi
I might have a Hawaiian floating around you can borrow.
Lisa Trager
You got a little plaid shirt that we can borrow.
Stavi
I might, I might. Let's find that. We'll go through the closet afterwards. All right, let's just play a couple more. Maybe some more just by accident. Twisted questions. Let's see what we got here.
Caller
Hi, ST and eldest and guest.
Stavi
So.
Caller
My problem is to get your opinion. My best friend's dad watches all of my Instagram stories.
Stavi
Oh yeah, my man is absolutely keeping it twisted on IG right now.
Caller
I'm freshly 22 and I've noticed for a while that he. He doesn't follow me on anything, like on Instagram or whatever, but he watches all of my stories like he's the first person to watch them. And I kind of let it slide because I try to just think of it as in innocent. But recently he has moved it into the DMs, split up on a picture of me that I posted on my Instagram story. And he just said like, you're very beautiful. I kind of don't know what to do. My friend confided in me a while ago that like her dad kind of creepy and like, good God, he like she's caught him taking pictures of girls, but she hasn't really confronted him. And this is something that's like kind of traumatizing to her. Her and I are like pretty close. Like we used to live together.
Stavi
Good, good.
Caller
But I just feel.
Stavi
You girls need any groceries? All right, is the sink still running? I can maybe come take a look.
Lisa Trager
The dad is coming in like, you need a case of twisted cheese. And he's like, no, he has no shirt on. He's like.
Stavi
Trying to keep it twisted.
Lisa Trager
Girl, block that man.
Stavi
Yeah, let's. Let's let her finish. But absolutely together.
Caller
But I just feel like this would not. She would not react well to this. And like I've met him before, I've gone out with her parents before. It's just kind of a weird situation. I don't know what to do. I blocked him and I don't know if I should just let it go. Should I tell her, like, hey, your dad's a creep and he's watching all my Instagram stories even though he doesn't follow me? What do I do? Do. I don't know, do I tell her? Do I not tell her? Do I just let it go since I already blocked him and I didn't respond to the dm, I just left it on open and. Yeah, really weird.
Stavi
What a creepy. The scene.
Caller
All right, thanks. Peace out.
Stavi
Love you. But now a local. A local landscaping company watches all her. All her stories. First.
Lisa Trager
The dad snowplow.
Stavi
Oh, fuck. Moose lodge number 255 just watched your Instagram stories.
Lisa Trager
Well, I mean, it sounds like you're. The friend already knows that her dad is a creep.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
So you don't necessarily need to tell her anything. Just block him and keep it moving.
Stavi
Yeah, I mean, I defer to you guys here because this is something you've. You've probably some version of probably experienced. My. My just knee jerk reaction is like maybe tell her just because she might want to know that. Like, because she's. She's aware of it. Right, right. And it's like the kind of thing like, hey, just so you know, I don't give a fuck. I blocked him. But like, this is the type of shit your dad is up to. Yeah, I think I probably would. But you know, I don't know.
Marie Faustin
I feel like. Like this happened to. I was the person that was blacked out. Get your friend blacked out. Tell them. See how they React and then they won't remember it. And then you kind of.
Stavi
You get a feeling for how they'd respond.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, but they're not going to.
Stavi
It's kind of like playing a hard boss on a video game and then xing out before you save and you're like all right, trying it again. Or like saving right before the boss and then like being like. And then being like all right didn't go well the first time.
Lisa Trager
Lisa said roofie your friend.
Stavi
Ask her dad. She's probably. He's probably got some laying around.
Marie Faustin
Get some roofy from Gary. Roofie Jen.
Lisa Trager
Be like, listen, your dad. Creepy as hell.
Stavi
Yeah. And in the 30, in the seven minutes before she passes out. Try this. That's interesting. What did they. What was the situation that somebody needed to.
Marie Faustin
Well, someone told me something. I. I reacted very well. So then they felt safe. And then when they casually mentioned it again, I had no idea what was going on. They knew they made a grave mistake and it. I. They said they have never seen me so angry in my life that they couldn't even believe it. Cuz I seemed really happy.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, up you were seven tequila shots in.
Marie Faustin
Yeah. So I guess this wasn't a good plan and I apologize. No, I just. I get so crazy and that's why I don't want to say anything because in my head like usually it's petty crime, it's little cre. And then it escalates because they can get away with it and next thing you know, he's grabbing someone. You gotta like, you know, shame him right away or is she gonna turn on you like that she started with.
Lisa Trager
Taking photos of her friend.
Stavi
Yeah. I mean that's insanity that she's already peeping Tom.
Lisa Trager
That's.
Stavi
That's already a crime.
Marie Faustin
She might want to cut her down.
Lisa Trager
Literally a crime.
Stavi
And so I think it's more like you owe it to your friend in some ways to be like, hey, he's still up to this. Just so you know.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
And she's. And you know, if you're going to lose. If she's going to cut her out again, it's the same thing.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Stavi
If she, She's a. You don't want that friend. If they're going to, you know, take their weird dad side. You don't want that.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, I think that I agree with you. Then she. You should tell your friend because she said that she's been to eat with her parents.
Marie Faustin
So Cuz if.
Stavi
Yeah, exactly.
Marie Faustin
Don't. Don't put me following her was a Different thing because then everyone knows you're following it. We're all friends here.
Lisa Trager
Oh, he might not be following her online, but he's definitely following that girl.
Marie Faustin
But that's what I mean, that's what makes it creepy. Oh yeah, right.
Stavi
No, but I. Even if he's following, it's still creepy. It is. It's less because it's I guess out in the open, but it's still weird.
Marie Faustin
She says she's putting my mom and I'm like, my mom follows my friend.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But your mom's not trying to your friend.
Lisa Trager
No, your mom's not like, hey, very beautiful.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah. And yeah, you're right. How old is this one guy? She's 20. She's like 22. That means they just graduated college.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, that's.
Stavi
That's gross.
Lisa Trager
That means the dad was watching her with her cap and gown. Like congratulations.
Marie Faustin
It's hard, but yeah, she should know. And then cuz her friend needs to be more protective of her friend. Not introduce friends to, you know.
Stavi
Yeah, true, true.
Marie Faustin
They need to be protect, more protected.
Stavi
And I mean to her friend's credit, she's also a young, young college, you know.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
How many times in college if like your parents were around, you're like, let me get one of my friends so they also get a free nice parents dinner. You know what I mean? Like so you know, that's what friends are for. Totally. But going forward, she has to. You're right. I think she just needs to know for her own.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, we had a little fun and games, but you gotta tell her it.
Lisa Trager
Sounds like the dad is ugly also. I'm gonna say.
Stavi
Right.
Lisa Trager
Because if the dad was hot. We all like hot dads.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Very amazing American be.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've never seen.
Eldest
I don't know, it could, it could be just a guy who's like creepy but not like horrible looking or something.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lisa Trager
Just some, just a hot dad would not. She wouldn't be reacting like this to a hot dad.
Marie Faustin
He'd be cheating. He'd just be out there cheating.
Stavi
She would have.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, maybe she would have banged him.
Eldest
For a little, you know, be some creepy boomer type. I don't know.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, little Kevin Spacey.
Marie Faustin
I wonder if he doesn't even know that. She could see that he watches every story.
Stavi
There's probably no chance he knows.
Marie Faustin
No idea.
Stavi
I'm so petrified of the gray head.
Eldest
Icon on his profile.
Marie Faustin
No, no, no, he has one of those.
Lisa Trager
He's got the Oakley's on. He's in the front seat of his car.
Marie Faustin
The angle is terrible and it's like.
Lisa Trager
American flags in his bio.
Stavi
That's.
Lisa Trager
That's who.
Stavi
You're probably right. So, yeah, tell. Yeah, good job blocking him, but yeah, tell your friend and make it clear.
Marie Faustin
You don't want too uncomfortable. Yeah. This guy and centering him or whatever. Yeah, tell her.
Stavi
Totally. Holy. That was twisted.
Lisa Trager
It was though.
Stavi
It really was twisted. For brand purposes, we can all agree that spiritually should have been the twisted question of the day, but for brand compliance reasons, it was not.
Lisa Trager
We don't want to get the SEC involved.
Stavi
You don't really want to get sexual predators, you know, involved with the brand.
Lisa Trager
So I'm gonna have to take one.
Stavi
Of these home, please. Take a whole fucking box.
Lisa Trager
I don't know if I need a box.
Stavi
Take a box. Go. What else we got? Elders?
Caller
Oh, Scotty Eldest. My name is Dan. I'm from central Oregon. The last few years I've been dating an absolute stunning woman. Like completely out of my league. I'm a 6 foot 4, 290 pound, you know, blob. And she's this like absolute time piece, smoke show.
Stavi
Like, good for you. Not joking.
Caller
Way out of my league. Anyways, we got super heavy into drinking and then got super heavy into coke.
Stavi
We're doing it every day.
Caller
You know, things started getting wilder and wilder in the bedroom. And then, you know, things get a little kinky. Things went, you know, try some new things. Things I've never done before. And you know, things went to the dark side, if you know what I mean. Brown eyes.
Stavi
Okay. Disgusting. The way you said it is gross. I don't even, I'm not even.
Lisa Trager
You know what I mean? And we're like, we don't know what you.
Eldest
Brown eye.
Stavi
He's anal. But it's.
Lisa Trager
I definitely knew it was butt.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's just like, you know, how. How off putting you have to be to make me a prude. Maybe like, oh, Jesus. But I definitely felt that way while he was talking. You were like, yuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, go ahead, buddy.
Caller
Anyways, fast forward to today. We're Both almost got six months clean U.S. over.
Stavi
Congratulations.
Caller
And she hit me with hey babe. Well, do you think we'll ever have that kind of sex again sober?
Stavi
Wow, she hit you with it.
Caller
I'm like, you mean like, you know, I rob hardcore sex?
Stavi
No, no, no, no, no. Why did you say no?
Caller
You know, put stuff that. I'm like, how do I tell this woman that? Like I had an eight ball of cocaine in my system. I was up, you know, like offensive. And I, you know, things were weird. Things got weird and I. I don't. I'm not that guy. Like, I just.
Stavi
He doesn't want to do. I don't know how to tell her.
Caller
That will never happen again without like.
Stavi
Losing her or do I let it happen? Try it out. I don't know what you guys. Tell me. This guy disgusted me.
Caller
Future of the show. Love you guys.
Marie Faustin
I also don't think he's clean and sober.
Stavi
Yeah. What did you sound like on fucking cocaine? Jesus Christ.
Lisa Trager
The message was like, I'm like, the WI fi is terrible in Oregon because that was cutting in and out.
Stavi
He sounded like a Bobcat Goldthwait character.
Marie Faustin
I mean, what did I do?
Lisa Trager
Do I fuck her again? I took that to mean she pegged him potentially.
Stavi
Yeah, maybe. Who knows? But something happened, right, sexually that he. He was into when he was on. Yeah, pegging. Maybe he. Either way. I mean, some guys really are very. Some people are very anti any butt stuff whatsoever unless they're very up. So this, my guy might just be a bit of a prude sans cocaine. Right. But here's the thing, man. You. She's hot as hell. You guys. Do you know how hard it is to maintain a hot girlfriend when the cocaine goes away? If you're a fat piece of shit, you got through that. You're both sober to get. Like, you kind of went through stuff. It's kind of beautiful, honestly. Yeah. And your biggest issue is your sexy dime piece girlfriend wants to do weird in the bedroom and you can't suck it up and you know, take it. Take, get. Yeah. Worst case scenario, you can't suck it up and like, you know, have clear broth for a day or like that. I mean, what are we talking about, man? This is. This is not a. This is not a huge sacrifice to do some weird with a hot woman that you love. Who cares? Grow up. Sorry.
Marie Faustin
My thing is he. Is he just embarrassed. He's into it and that's why he needs the drugs.
Stavi
Possibly.
Marie Faustin
Or is he not into it and then you can't. You know what I mean?
Stavi
I know.
Lisa Trager
Look, I know you can't force it. Force. Put it in there.
Stavi
I.
Marie Faustin
If you're embarrassed and you do like it, then do it.
Stavi
Well, I'll even go so far as to say, like, even if you don't.
Marie Faustin
Like it, you should.
Stavi
Even if you don't love it. Right. Like, you probably should love it.
Marie Faustin
Right?
Stavi
But in a relationship Like, I don't.
Marie Faustin
Want to lick a butt.
Stavi
Sure. But if somebody, if you were, if you loved, I don't know, that's fine. No, no, no, but that's a good example.
Marie Faustin
Like you have to lick my butt. I'd be like, I gotta get out of here.
Stavi
But how about that? Let me, let's put it in context though. What if this is the love of your life. Yeah. Somebody. It's somebody that you, you love. You've been through stuff, you have a good relationship. Relationship. They're insanely hot. It's the person you find. He described her as an absolute smoke show dime piece. You'd lick their butt.
Marie Faustin
You're right, you would.
Stavi
At least a couple times a year. At least.
Marie Faustin
Hold on.
Lisa Trager
If it's a girl.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, right.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Straight men don't know how to clean their booty.
Stavi
Well, listen, look, I'm just saying, maybe the guy, like I said, clear broth and he's in there with a. He's getting in there with a lot of elbow grease and a washcloth sex.
Marie Faustin
Worker to come over and I'd watch.
Stavi
And listen, here's the thing. That's compromise, right?
Marie Faustin
That's, that's another woman could lick your ass.
Stavi
And that's. And I think somebody would be very happy to hear that in certain situations. Right? But this thing, this guy you at least have to talk about and that's. You immediately went to like, immature. He's being immature.
Marie Faustin
He's immature.
Stavi
Like, let's find some solutions here.
Lisa Trager
He's not comfortable with how much he liked it or he didn't love it.
Marie Faustin
I wish he told us what it was. He doesn't want to fudge her butt.
Stavi
I mean, if he doesn't want to. If this is about not her butt, this guy's gotta go.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, I don't think it's that.
Stavi
It could be though. Some guys are weird. If it's his. But if it's her butt. Stop listening to the show. I don't want you in my fan base if you can't suck it up. And your gorgeous girlfriend in the ass if she asks you to leave. We don't need you even if you're on the Patreon. I want your five bucks a month.
Lisa Trager
Take your money and go.
Stavi
Take your money and go.
Lisa Trager
Take your money in your butthole and get.
Stavi
And grow up.
Eldest
I wonder, I wonder just based off his off putting demeanor, if he's just angling for a way to start doing coke and drinking again with her or even if, if either he or she is Doing it or something. Well, either way, he's got a frogginess in his voice.
Stavi
He does, but he might just be a fun way.
Eldest
I could have crazy sex is if I have like a bunch of coke.
Stavi
But that's.
Lisa Trager
You know what? You can try.
Marie Faustin
What.
Lisa Trager
What was his name? Sam. Sam. Get some poppers.
Stavi
Oh, true.
Lisa Trager
Get some poppers.
Stavi
We're assuming it's him getting his ass here. That's. You know, that might not be the issue.
Lisa Trager
Let. Let him get rid of his inhibitions for like 10 seconds at a time.
Stavi
Okay.
Lisa Trager
30 seconds at a time.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
That's not coke and it's not. You know, I don't think the.
Stavi
The secret. I don't think the answer is chemical.
Marie Faustin
Sure.
Stavi
I don't think it is. I think for him it's. You're right. He has something to look inward either. I think you might be onto something with the like, the shame aspect of it. Are you actually into it? And if that's the case, why can't you be open with the person you love? Right? Like, this is a good opportunity for you to work through some of that in a supportive environment. Clearly this woman's into it. She wants to. And you don't have to, by the way. You don't have to go 0 to 100. You don't have to go right back to the top, tip top of the freakiest you did when you were in the midst of addiction. But you can work your way up if it's. And you can both explore as a couple. That's one scenario, right? If you actually secretly like it in the second scenario, where it's not your favorite relationships are about compromise. And if everything else is great and she's hot as. And you guys went through all this and you have to kind of make. You have to, you know, one for them, one for you kind of thing, right? Where you do something that's not your favorite thing in the world. World, that's okay too. I mean, don't do anything that you feel really, really horrible about. But like, if you can suck it up a little bit and make a sacrifice for someone you love, that's part of it. Or like Lisa went to immediately. Let's find a third solution. You know what I mean?
Lisa Trager
Let's bring in a third.
Stavi
But I don't know, it's up to you. But absolutely, you gotta definitely don't do cocaine. If Eldis is right, definitely don't angle for a way to get back into this stuff. But grow up a little bit, buddy. We all. You could do some. Your part. I've been with people who like. Like certain things that weren't my favorite. Who cares? You just do it and then sometimes. And then it becomes fun. You know what I mean? Like, you figure out maybe you do like it. You just gotta. You gotta grow up a little bit. Especially. You gotta keep it twisted. Especially. Especially if you're ugly and she's hot as shit. I mean, let's be real. Let's talk about brass tax here, brother.
Lisa Trager
Listen, grow up and open up.
Stavi
Oh, fuck. All right, let's do some. I've lost track. I'm having a great time. I've lost track of time. What do we have?
Eldest
We're at 140.
Stavi
Oh, beautiful. You got. You got time. Do a couple more.
Marie Faustin
Oh, yeah.
Lisa Trager
Let's get them out of the way.
Stavi
Let's do it. Let's do it.
Lisa Trager
It took me four score and seven.
Marie Faustin
Years to get here.
Stavi
All right.
Marie Faustin
I just kept. Because of the switch from voice to text, I keep thinking there's going to be something about Elvis.
Stavi
No. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
They're not.
Stavi
It never.
Marie Faustin
It always sounds like they're all starting with an apology.
Stavi
Right? Right. Yes. They can't get the. They can't get ST or eldest. We have the two names that Google cannot figure out. So it's always like something weird.
Marie Faustin
Sorry, Elvis.
Stavi
They'll be like, hey, Stubby. Which isn't a bad nickname for me. Go ahead, give us a couple more here. Eldest.
Lisa Trager
I'm screaming.
Stavi
What's up?
Caller
Eldest and guest. I love what you guys do. It really brings me a lot of joy to get to hang out with you guys.
Stavi
Oh, thank you, buddy.
Lisa Trager
I get to hang out with you.
Caller
Sorry to bring the mood down with a serious one, but I'm having a little bit of trouble letting go of the past and, like, allowing myself to be happy, especially around the holiday days. I had a really good childhood. I was always super close with my mom. Holidays were always a good time. But she got sick and in 2020, she died right before the pandemic. And it sent everything into a spiral, of course, and haven't really recovered. Things have been difficult. And now I've got this great, wonderful girlfriend and we're super in love. Love. She's got this big, wonderful Italian family and she's really close with her mom.
Stavi
Nice.
Caller
They love me and they take me in. They make me feel super welcomed. I spent last Christmas with them, but I, like, I always feel so sad being around them. It, like, it just reminds me of what I lost. And I know that that's really selfish and I just want to get over that. And I don't know if you have any experience with grief and dealing with this kind of thing, but I just don't want them to feel guilty for having a big happy family around me. And I want to move on with my life.
Stavi
Oh, come on, dude.
Caller
I, you know, I, I, I don't want to, want to pull her away from her family. I just want to learn to accept it and I want to, like, I just want to be better about that. So anyway, thanks, guys. I appreciate it. It's my second one.
Stavi
My last one was too long, but nice, dude.
Caller
All right, peace.
Stavi
All right. Eldest really kept the joyful mood up. We're talking about, we're talking about a cokehead potentially getting pegged and you're like, I got just the follow up.
Lisa Trager
Well, at least this guy apologizes.
Stavi
No, I love, I love this guy. No, I mean, I, this is a tough one.
Marie Faustin
I guess the first thing I would say is, and I hope it's yes, but you should be in therapy.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Marie Faustin
You're a great resource source for sure.
Stavi
A lot of training. Come here.
Eldest
Are you subscribed to the Patreon?
Stavi
Yeah, that might that. If not, I've seen some studies that actually seasonal depression goes down a nice amount if you're subscribed to the Patreon.
Eldest
There's a big beautiful backlog of a hundred plus episodes ready to go for you back there. That'll really get you feeling.
Stavi
That'll really help. That'll really help.
Eldest
Better than family.
Stavi
In many ways, we're your family.
Lisa Trager
Listen, when you're on the Patreon, your.
Stavi
Family, it's like Olive Garden when you're in the Patreon, your family.
Lisa Trager
But I do think that that's the biggest thing is getting you a grief counselor or something like that.
Marie Faustin
Because I heard I haven't dealt with grief like this, so. And I hope I could wait a while for it, but you know, I, what people say is like, it never gets smaller. Your life has to get bigger. Like the pains going to stay there. You know, it's your mom. So it's, it is about building.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
This life.
Stavi
You're doing a great job by the way around it.
Marie Faustin
And it's okay that it's hard.
Stavi
Yeah. And that's the other thing. It's also relatively soon. Yeah. I mean, like, you know, a four or five years. Especially when it's like somebody was sick and like that's, it's so okay for you to feel the Number one thing to understand is it's so okay for what you're feeling. Feeling. Don't worry about. It's completely understandable to be a little bummed during the holidays and just if you find yourself having some moments of sadness in the middle of this big, happy, you know, joyous occasion, that's okay. Go take a walk. Go whatever. Be, you know, like, confide in somebody. Take a walk. It'll take you a second. But it's okay to just take that, feel that, let it pass, and then go back and, you know, have some meatballs with all the. With her big greasy family. You know what I mean? Get some calamari in your system, brother.
Marie Faustin
And this might be too far. I mean, maybe you can include your mom and a tradition that you bring to this family.
Stavi
Yeah, you know? Yeah, absolutely.
Marie Faustin
Talk about her. Bring it up. Say how you feel about it to these people if they're so warm, you.
Stavi
Know, and you see and you have a good relationship with your girl. That's, you know, she. She probably understands. And if you like this family. Family, they'll be open to it. I mean, I think we should defer to you elders. You've. You literally have dealt with this exact issue.
Eldest
Yeah. You know, I mean, yeah, it's interesting when my. My wife has, like, a really big family, and in a way that was, like, consoling when I, like, lost my mom and then my dad a few years later. So that's. That's what makes this call very interesting to me, is because, like, he just feels alienated in all that, which. Which theoretically should make you feel, like, better. And I felt that, too. It's like a sadness if. If you're around the people. But, I mean, I would say, yeah, definitely talk about it in therapy. And it sounds like. I mean, you know, it is relatively soon, but four years is a long time. It just feel like these moments of bitterness it sounds like he's feeling. Or alienation. And also. Yeah, talk about it. Even talk about it, like, solo with your girlfriend. I feel like. Like feel like, you know, girls love to talk about that, and it always just feels kind of good to get it off your chest. And I'm sure she'll be more than happy to, like, be a sounding board and be there for you and be like, oh, I miss your mom, too. Yeah, for whatever.
Lisa Trager
And you don't have to tell the whole family. Your girlfriend is going to tell everybody.
Stavi
She don't tell her.
Lisa Trager
Not everybody, but she's going to tell.
Stavi
Her mom the right people and her.
Lisa Trager
Mom is going to like, be aware and like, they're going. Gonna kind of, you know, they're gonna be aware and, and take that into consideration the whole time that you're with them.
Eldest
And they also are aware too, currently. So, you know, it's not like anyone's surprised. Like, you're thinking about your own family, like during the holidays. So.
Stavi
Yeah, totally.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Eldest
Don't be afraid.
Marie Faustin
But it seems like the other option he's thinking is like, don't go to Christmas and sit home alone.
Stavi
That's not the answer.
Eldest
No, it's not gonna be better. It's just gonna, it's gonna make you feel better to like, talk about how sad you are. Yeah, you will just. Even if it's like sad while you're doing it, you will just feel a sense of relief after. That's why you should do therapy too, if you haven't really explored any of this yet.
Marie Faustin
And there's actually. If you've not seen the Family Stone, it's a sad Christmas movie about a matriarch dying.
Lisa Trager
Is that Nicole Kidman?
Marie Faustin
No, it's Sarah Jessica Parker. Diane Keaton. Correcty. Nelson.
Stavi
I don't know. Yeah, that one that looked like, to be honest, Luke Wilson.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Yeah, Just watch Elf. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
I love. Oh, Step Mom, Stepmom and the Family Stone are sad mom dying Christmas movies. That might be something that you are craving. I don't know if you want to be sad but still do holidays and not have guilt. Those are two sad mom dying Christmas movies.
Stavi
Yeah, yikes. That's.
Marie Faustin
But again, Elf, Home Alone are options.
Stavi
And he's also. The other thing is he's worried about them feeling guilty. I don't think they feel guilty, but I think they're just. And this is just you, you're just hyper aware and maybe that's an issue you have just in general in your life of like people pleasey or whatever, you are not making anyone feel bad by being bumped bummed for missing your mom on Christmas. That's an insane thing. Like anyone who reacts that way is a piece of. And I don't think these people are like that. And so don't worry about that. Just, you know, like we, like we've said is just get. Find somebody to confide in, probably your girlfriend. If you have a sad moment and you just need a moment to yourself, that'll probably pass and you'll go back to. You know what I mean? Like, you'll go back to, to Christmas and the holidays and it's just, just. It just takes time. And it's. You'll always miss. You always miss somebody that fundamental in your life. Right. And it's. But you're already taking the steps to build around. I mean, you have a great. You, You. You're in a good position. It could be. You could be, you know, our last caller, some cokehead. Some recovering cokehead who doesn't have going on and he can't even please a sexy girlfriend. You're in a nice spot. Spot with a. With. In a nice relationship with a nice support system. And like, you know, it's nice that you can go to a nice Christmas.
Lisa Trager
And I.
Stavi
That's a positive.
Lisa Trager
And I'm also going to add that the holidays are a really rough time for lots of people in general.
Stavi
Yeah.
Lisa Trager
Right. So don't feel bad for feeling bad.
Stavi
Actually, that's a great point. I was sad as last. The last Christmas. That was just a. I had a weird, tough Christmas last year, and that was just. Just, you know, not lost. It was just general just, you know, thinking about my family. You know, like, you just. That just happens. It's a. It's a tough time in general. That's a great point, Marie. Don't feel like you're like. The. What you're feeling is like, su. Like incredibly is just like really depressing to people because of what you're going through. I think a lot of people have issues in general, and you. You actually are one of the few people that really deserves it, you know, more than I did. Getting sad just. Just watching the leftovers and being, like, sad on. Which is a great movie, by the way. You guys seen it?
Lisa Trager
It was all right.
Stavi
You didn't like it? I mean, yeah.
Lisa Trager
I was like, where's the food?
Stavi
Well, that's not. It was not what they were referring to, Marie.
Eldest
Like, where's the big family holiday celebration?
Lisa Trager
I was like, let me go back to Tyler Perry Christmas.
Stavi
So, yeah, throwing Tyler Perry's Christmas. I did try and get my family on Thanksgiving to go see Madea's Halloween, and they wouldn't go last year.
Lisa Trager
Why would you do that to your family?
Stavi
Would have been awesome. No, it was like. No, because we would have to go to the Discount because it was already past Halloween. We would have gone to the discount theater, but we grew up in that discount theater. We saw Stuart Little there. We saw the. What else do we see? A lot of good stuff.
Marie Faustin
My parents and I went to the discount movie theater every Friday till I was in high school.
Stavi
Love that. Yes.
Marie Faustin
Speed. Until high school.
Stavi
That's nice.
Lisa Trager
Speed. I I only have ever seen that movie on television.
Stavi
Oh, it holds up.
Marie Faustin
You watch it? Of course. They're movie stars. Look at that.
Stavi
I mean, they're star.
Lisa Trager
I mean, that was peak kee, I think.
Stavi
Yeah. Have you seen the surfing movie movie?
Lisa Trager
The one where the girl loses her arm?
Stavi
No, no, no, no. Point Point Break.
Eldest
Point Break.
Stavi
Yeah. That's great, Keanu. You should watch that. That's. That's P. Keanu.
Eldest
That's a wild movie.
Stavi
It's a wild movie. And he's a piece of ass in that surfing movie. Okay, well, good luck, buddy. You know, maybe watch Point Break too. It's a awesome movie even for you.
Marie Faustin
Or my s. Oh, yeah.
Stavi
Or.
Lisa Trager
Or Speed. Not the movie, the dress.
Stavi
Yeah.
Eldest
Get a Twisted Tea.
Stavi
Yeah.
Eldest
It's what your mom would have wanted.
Stavi
No, Elvis, we know she would have wanted him to subscribe to the Patreon where we directly get the money and it's not filtered through Twisted Tea.
Lisa Trager
Oh, my God.
Stavi
All right, what else we got here? Little eldest?
Lisa Trager
Oh, a short one.
Marie Faustin
Oh, yeah, I see the. Hey, Stubby.
Lisa Trager
Oh, my God.
Stavi
Sorry.
Caller
Hey, stop. Hey, Elvis. So I just have like a life question.
Stavi
Okay.
Caller
I always did really well in school. I always like dotted all my. I crossed all my T's. The only thing I didn't do was I didn't go to college and. But I opened my own business instead. And I became like a blue collar woman who owns her own business kind of thing.
Stavi
Respect.
Caller
But I recently just turned 25.
Lisa Trager
Oh.
Caller
And I can't help but think of like my stupid childhood dreams, which is like so stupid to say. But I always wanted to be like. Like in centerfold or do Playboy bunnies and keep it. Do like anything cool like that. And I just never. I don't know, everybody always kind of put me down on it. I was always really good at school. Yeah. I never told anybody that I wanted to do this. I feel like it'd be really, like, disappointing for myself. I would never tell my family that I'm obviously doing like only fans or Playboy Bunny or anything like that. But I just thought, like, is it stupid for me to like want to pursue this or like even try to. Am I too old? Am I like, do you have to be like a drop dead gorgeous person? I'm pretty cute. I'm not trying to like shoot my own horn or anything. I have pretty nice kids. I'm not like overweight or anything. I just always thought about doing it. People have told me that I've been really. That has been really pretty Interesting.
Stavi
Fascinating.
Caller
I just thought it would be really cool. But I'm like, am I just like a dumb ho? Is that. Just keep with my business. I would never stop working. I would never give up my job. But I just thought, like, maybe a couple pictorials would be cool. I don't know. And then the other thing is, like, how do I bring this up to my girlfriend that, like, I want to do this? Is she going to just. She's just going to be like, you're just a dumb hoe. Like, no, this is like, what I've thought about a long time. Well, that's just it. I hope you guys have a good day.
Stavi
This is fascinating. Yeah.
Marie Faustin
My first gut instinct is to say, you're only gonna get older and not hotter.
Stavi
So, yeah. Yeah. If you want, do it now.
Marie Faustin
Do it, baby. I mean, or hopefully, you know, whatever.
Stavi
But probably yes, that's how.
Marie Faustin
That's how sucks. And so do it.
Stavi
Yeah. But also, what does doing it mean?
Marie Faustin
I don't know how Playboy magazine works so much anymore.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
But they used to do like top 10 college hot, and they would go scout or whatever. Just like, send your to Playboy. And it's different now. I don't know if they've seen it. It's like, like, who's, who's them.
Lisa Trager
Who's picking the people now that Hugh is going.
Marie Faustin
Son. No, I. It is his son. But. Yeah, but I'm sure there's some employees, there's some offices in Chicago. But send it to Playboy. Well, I also think something bad to have a photo shoot and send it to Playboy.
Stavi
But I wonder, like, what is the, what is the goal here? Right? Like, is it just put it in.
Marie Faustin
A frame and then when you're old.
Stavi
But that's what I'm saying, like, do you need to get. First of all, Playboy is a difficult validation.
Marie Faustin
So if you're picked by Playboy, that means you're hotter than everyone else.
Lisa Trager
This is what I think she should do.
Marie Faustin
Or am I wrong?
Stavi
You should.
Marie Faustin
We call take nudes.
Stavi
But that's what I. That's what I'm questioning. That's what I'm wondering.
Marie Faustin
But this is what I think she should do.
Lisa Trager
I think you should get your girlfriend to take the pictures for you. Right. Because your girlfriend's gonna make you feel hot.
Marie Faustin
Yeah.
Stavi
Or there's people who specialize in this kind, like a boudoir photo. Or like, get a. Get a actual photographer that like, you know, is not weird and just like, does not.
Lisa Trager
Terry Richardson.
Stavi
Do not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. None of those. And Like, I wonder will that. I guess my question is that enough is like taking incredible. An incredible pictorial. Yeah, that's cool. I like that. It's taking. It's taking an incredible. It's like taking a really nice professional, you know, naked photo shoot that you have is almost like this time capsule. Is that enough or is there. Is there a part of it that's like wanting to be, you know, like to get notoriety from it? That's my question.
Lisa Trager
Well, is that what happens with Play Playmates now? Like, you are in the magazine and then you get a Baywatch?
Stavi
No, nothing happens anymore.
Lisa Trager
That's what I'm saying. So I think it's just something she's always wanted to do. I think once you do it, only.
Marie Faustin
Fans is the thing. Then she want to make money. It doesn't sound like.
Eldest
I feel like. I feel like even Playboy is so just like everything else. It's not like, oh, you get discovered one day and you get blown up. I feel like they go to like people who are already doing only fans or putting out their own, like sexy content or whatever and are sort of, you know, like the influencers or personalities online and have like followings.
Stavi
Like, is that what you want to do? Do you want to be a sexy personality on the Internet?
Marie Faustin
Right.
Stavi
That's available to you if you want that. But that's all. Here's the thing. It's also annoying.
Marie Faustin
What's your business? Are you settling school supplies to the school?
Lisa Trager
What's the business?
Stavi
What is the business? Could that. Could this potentially things. Because we'd all like to live in a world where it doesn't, but we know that's just not how things work.
Lisa Trager
Right.
Stavi
So if it's something that wouldn't fuck up your business and you really want. Because you're right, you don't just get discovered. You have to kind of build your way up and like.
Eldest
And that is like a ton of work.
Stavi
If it's a ton of work.
Eldest
Business going already.
Stavi
Yeah, I mean, that's the other thing to realize. Like any kind of artistic pursuit and even, even like modeling or on some level, this kind of modeling, that's hard. People friends of mine that I know that do only fans. It's like people think, oh, you just show your tits and you get a hundred thousand dollars. It's like a lot of people fail at that. A lot of people flame out. You have to be constantly posting stuff. Yeah, it's like a lot of these. A lot of people hire assistants and hire like social media teams and hire like There's a lot of work that goes into it.
Marie Faustin
You have to DM these people.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah. Or hire some guy to do it.
Eldest
They got eldest is DMing back horny dudes.
Stavi
They got their own elders.
Marie Faustin
So now definitely take photos asap.
Stavi
At least take a really nice professional photo shoot. Yeah. And then like decide, is that enough for you? Is having that there as a time capsule of how hot you are right now enough? And. Or do. Are you interested in trying to put yourself out there in a way and maybe, you know, there's accounts that are like faceless. You could try that if you really wanted to.
Marie Faustin
Try.
Lisa Trager
Exactly.
Stavi
I've seen some of those. I've been on. Who amongst us hasn't been on hygiene?
Eldest
Such things.
Stavi
Yeah, I'm a. I'm a wheelhouse. I'm trying to help the caller. Marie, excuse me for using some real world knowledge to guide my friend here into what she should possibly do. There's different ways you could do it. You could dip your toe in it as deep or as shallow as you.
Marie Faustin
Want and watch America's Next Top Model. You gotta get some tips. Some girls are really hot and sexy, but you got, you know, there's posing involved.
Stavi
There's posing involved.
Marie Faustin
Maybe watch the first few seasons.
Lisa Trager
Yeah, maybe. Maybe try for Sports Illustrated and then maybe you can walk the fashion show.
Stavi
That might be even harder. You know, this is competitive.
Lisa Trager
I'm just trying to give a person who said they not ugly.
Marie Faustin
But I think you can submit Playboy, get a photo shoot and then submits all these magazines. And depending on how naked you want to get, you can involve a hustler.
Stavi
In it or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now we're talking.
Marie Faustin
Spread your pussy lips. You can enter the other magazines.
Lisa Trager
If you go, spread your pussy lips, please get paid for it.
Stavi
Yeah, I agree, I agree. Don't send an unsolicited spread pig that you didn't get paid for, but take the pics. Decide what you want. Think about how, if you want to pursue it, how it might affect the rest of your. The rest of your life. But you're not a dumb hoe for having these aspirations.
Marie Faustin
You want people think you're a dumb hoe?
Lisa Trager
No.
Marie Faustin
Whether you take the first.
Stavi
People hate women. They think you're. A lot of people think you're a dumb already. You'll be fine. Show those titties off. Next. Yeah, drop them on the glass. Drop them on the proverbial glass as they say. You got something fun for us to go out on here, Elvis?
Lisa Trager
Yeah, let's end With a bang.
Marie Faustin
No death in the families, please.
Caller
Hey there, st. Hey there, eldest. Hey there. Yeah, I don't really have a question for you, just more of a. More of a thank you, I guess. I listen to the show and you have confidence issues with dating and all that. And all you guys, like so many people have called in and had the same issues. You guys, like, points have been really good, like working out. I've tried that.
Stavi
Nice. Dude.
Caller
That's health and eating bed aid. Cooking for myself. I went out of my comfort zone, got on dating apps again.
Stavi
There you go.
Caller
That's been going well. But the biggest thing I know you're probably not gonna be a fan of this one, but I recommend for the listeners out there that are struggling that you get a dog. I got myself a dog. And that freaking thing, I don't know, it changed my life. It's just nice having some like something to look for or look after instead of myself. She gets me out of the house and I'm. And also girls love dogs.
Stavi
There we go.
Caller
Nothing going good.
Stavi
Amen, brother.
Caller
It's very easy. Icebreaker when walking by a girl with a dog. So, yeah, I know how you feel.
Stavi
About dogs, but I'm not anti dog in America. People really.
Lisa Trager
Yet they really do.
Stavi
There's a animal who gives a. It's nice.
Lisa Trager
No one treats dogs the way they do in America.
Stavi
Anywhere else in the world. It's crazy. I really like endless. I love dogs. I. It's truly when like I. Because the thing is I've never even thought about it because I travel too much to even consider it. And there's definitely a point in my life where when I'm settled, have a family if that, you know, if we go down that route. But whatever. Even if I'm married, whenever I'm settled down in a house, I want to have a dog. I just don't. But like I will never. It's so weird when I see people that are like, you know, somebody's like twenty thousand dollar gofundme for my dog's liver surgery. The dogs let it go. It's a animal.
Lisa Trager
Some people don't have insurance on their bodies, but the dog fully assured.
Marie Faustin
Because dogs change people's lives. He's getting out there, he feels better, there's something to do.
Stavi
That's all great.
Marie Faustin
You know, it really helps with loneliness.
Lisa Trager
I love that for him.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm. But I just want to make. That's all my point is I don't make that clear. I'm not against dogs. But I'm happy you found a dog. And I actually do think if you have the kind of job where you are, you know, you're settled into a nice place that you live, you don't travel all the time for work, and you don't really see people. You don't get out and about. I actually do think a dog is really. Could be really good for you because it's like. Yeah, I. I have friends of mine that, you know, that helped them start working, just exercising, just walking the dog ended up being more exercise than they had done for a while. And they're cute.
Marie Faustin
They're personalities.
Stavi
I think that's a good idea. I want to be clear. I'm not anti dog. I'm just anti overdoing it with dogs.
Lisa Trager
I meant that dog. I'm not picking a poop on a rainy day.
Marie Faustin
You're someone that would protect to have the elders.
Stavi
Who were you telling me? What were you telling me? That there was like. So was that you or was it Ben, where it was like, somebody put up, like a. Yeah, our friend.
Eldest
Our friend.
Stavi
Big P. The elusive Big P. Are.
Eldest
You talking about the GoFundMe thing?
Stavi
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eldest
He said, like, he said years ago in Baltimore, someone made a gofundme that I was like, please help me find my dog. I can't. We need to find it. He got loose, and he's in the neighborhood, whatever. And they were like, trying to raise a thousand bucks. They raised, like, a crazy amount of money. Like $20,000 or something.
Stavi
If they had said, help me find my son, they would have raised less money.
Lisa Trager
Be like, go call Liam Neeson. Your son got took.
Eldest
Or people would have been like, you're a bad parent.
Stavi
You should take care of your kids. Yeah.
Eldest
Or like that. And it's like, yeah, people just. And I think they end up. The dog was like, in their backyard neighborhood, or like, something stupid like that. It's like, yeah, people just give way more empathy to, like, animals than they.
Marie Faustin
Do other human sociopaths are really. They gravitate towards animals because animals don't question them. They could go away with their narcissistic, like, psycho behavior. And a lot of really evil people love animals like Ellen and stuff.
Lisa Trager
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
Because. Yeah. Like, they're. They give to animal charities. They're giving to elephant charities during COVID You know, these maniacs. People are losing their homes, and they're like, we gotta get the dog. And I'm like, the dogs are being adopted. But it. It's. It keeps. It lets you Be shitty and look like you're caring about something, but you're not.
Stavi
That's a great point.
Marie Faustin
And look, someone that stays quiet.
Stavi
Yeah, that makes sense. And look pro dog happy for you. And we're happy that your life is turning around. And again, I am pro dog. I'm just anti the fact that like, you know, Michael. What Michael Vic did was bad, but the mount people hated him compared to guys who beat their wives.
Marie Faustin
Yeah, but that's.
Stavi
What was she wearing? Yeah, yeah. It's like there's video of a place.
Marie Faustin
Player like dragging a woman and it's back into the. And the people. He was found not guilty with the video footage.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah. He played for the Baltimore Ravens. I know people who still have his jersey. So. Yes, people are pieces of. Yeah, yeah. It's crazy.
Lisa Trager
It's crazy that you know exactly who she's talking about when all of them kind of do it.
Marie Faustin
Well, this video.
Stavi
The video. The elevator video.
Marie Faustin
No, this is a hotel. This is a different one where she was running out escaping him.
Lisa Trager
Did he video?
Marie Faustin
No. With a bra on and he grabbed her. But the elevator one, I know about too.
Lisa Trager
All the elevator ones.
Stavi
But that's all I'm saying is that people really put some people rank dogs over humans. And that I can't get down with. That's it. That's my stance on dogs. I'm happy you're. You're getting your dick sucked. You're. You're in better sh.
Marie Faustin
You remember when Ted Cruz left his little puppy this whole family escape?
Stavi
No, that was snowball. Well, didn't M. Romney, like, leave his dog on the roof of his car or some.
Eldest
I think you're thinking National Lampoon's vacation.
Stavi
Look up Mitt Romney dog. We'll go out on this.
Marie Faustin
Look up Ted Cruz. They like, everyone was so. Well, they weren't pissed enough.
Stavi
Drove 12 hours with his dog on top of the car. I was right.
Lisa Trager
He didn't forget the dog. He just left it on the truck.
Stavi
Yeah, yeah.
Marie Faustin
That's so crazy.
Stavi
In a windshield, a equipped carrier. Interesting.
Marie Faustin
Oh, my God. Look up Ted Cruz dog. It is so cute. They left him during the hurricane or whatever was happening. You're going to images, if that's okay. Sorry.
Stavi
Yeah, of course.
Marie Faustin
The one in the door, that fourth one. Yeah. There's the dog. Do you see it?
Stavi
Oh, yeah. They just left him alone.
Lisa Trager
Is it in the window?
Marie Faustin
Yeah. So the neighbors were like. It's when he was leaving, when the. His constituents needed him.
Stavi
That's hilarious. That's so funny.
Lisa Trager
The Dog said, I guess I'm not.
Marie Faustin
Part of the family.
Stavi
Good luck, Snowball.
Lisa Trager
They all went to Cancun. Now look at Obama's dog.
Stavi
Yeah.
Marie Faustin
He'S fluffy and taken care of.
Stavi
Oh, and well, yeah, let's go out on. And then of course, Major Biden, who kept biting. People respect the Major. I believe he's dead now.
Lisa Trager
But already you talk about Biden or the dog command.
Stavi
Oh, yeah, Major. Yeah, there he is. Is a German shepherd owned by Joe.
Marie Faustin
Biden, previously owned by I love years active. Oh, yeah, yeah.
Stavi
That's so funny. Incidents.
Marie Faustin
But I get what you mean with, like, my parents. Our cat wasn't doing well and I was like, well, let's take her in. Like, we got to help her. And they were like, lisa, this is life. We've lived a long time. Like, we got to let her go. And I go, I'm just going to take her in. The just had a uti. She lived four more years. Like, it was.
Stavi
No, no. But I remember, like, it's time.
Marie Faustin
I go, no, it's not time.
Lisa Trager
How does a cat get a UTI girl?
Marie Faustin
I don't know.
Stavi
Yeah. What was your kid cat up to?
Marie Faustin
Eating grass. Puking.
Stavi
Yeah. Respect. Well, that'll do it for us. Thank you. Thanks for coming.
Marie Faustin
I'm glad you're helping people cook.
Stavi
And we're trying. We're trying.
Marie Faustin
Get out there.
Stavi
We're trying. Yeah, that's a. That's a positive story from our pal. Thanks. That was fun. That was a great episode, guys.
Marie Faustin
Thanks for having us.
Stavi
And yeah, listen to the pods. See them live. And we will talk to you guys next time. Bye. Bye.
Lisa Trager
Keep it Twitter.
Stavi
Keep it twisted.
Stavvy's World - Episode #107: Liza Treyger and Marie Faustin (December 16, 2024)
Hosted by Stavros Halkias
In Episode #107 of "Stavvy's World," host Stavros Halkias welcomes regular guest Marie Faustin and newcomer Liza Treyger. The trio engages in their trademark candid and humorous conversations, covering a variety of topics from personal anecdotes and high school memories to immigration experiences and modern-day challenges. Throughout the episode, listeners call in with personal dilemmas, seeking advice on relationships, wedding planning, and coping with grief. The dynamic interplay between Stav, Liza, and Marie ensures a blend of laughter, insight, and relatable discussions for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.
The episode kicks off with Stavros welcoming his guests:
Stavros [01:00]: "Welcome. Thanks for coming, gals. We have Lisa Trager. We have Marie Faustin returning."
Stavros [01:12]: "And Marie, I actually got a text from you at around 1:55 that said traffic was bad, which is interesting because I didn't know that when traffic's good, you can get from Brooklyn to Queens in five minutes. That's actually new information to me."
This sets the tone for a relaxed and humorous session as the hosts delve into light-hearted topics.
The conversation begins with a playful discussion about being on time and dealing with traffic:
Marie Faustin [01:19]: "I'm on the train. Your text goes, I'm about to head out the door. I go, What?"
Stavros [02:02]: "Nothing worse than when your piece of a late friend. And we all have them. One of them is on the couch right now."
The trio shares anecdotes about instances of punctuality mishaps, highlighting the universal struggle of being on time and the humorous side of unexpected delays.
A significant portion of the episode reminisces about high school fashion trends and personal style evolutions:
Marie Faustin [06:31]: "I bought goth pants once from Gadzooks and my..."
Stavros [06:46]: "I'm wearing a jinky bra right now. No, my parents made me return them immediately."
Marie Faustin [07:15]: "I have a Red Hot Chili Peppers tattoo that's haunted my life."
The guests reflect on their youthful fashion choices, the rebellious spirit of their teenage years, and how their styles have transformed over time. The discussion extends to the cyclical nature of fashion trends and the unique twists they've added to their personal wardrobes.
Marie Faustin shares personal insights about her immigration journey:
Marie Faustin [17:48]: "I was three. I'm from Ukraine, President Day, Ukraine."
Stavros [18:14]: "We have two Eastern European refugees. Oh, where are you from?"
The conversation touches upon the challenges and cultural adjustments faced by immigrants, highlighting resilience and the blending of different cultural backgrounds within their families.
The trio delves into discussions about dietary habits and the evolution of the food pyramid:
Marie Faustin [31:20]: "What's at the top? I love the food pyramid we grew up with. That's like so funny."
Stavros [32:55]: "I think Josh set this up. It really is. There's shoes. There's gym shoes and feet as part of the pyramid next to salmon and broccoli."
They humorously critique outdated food pyramid models, pondering the absurdity of certain food group placements and comparing them to modern dietary guidelines. The conversation also explores favorite foods, dietary preferences, and the impact of cultural influences on eating habits.
The episode touches on personal struggles with substance use and the journey towards sobriety:
Marie Faustin [26:44]: "I just saw a moment of horny. Okay. So a girl that a guy asked her to put gummy candies in her socks, go running, and then put them in a bag and send them off."
Stavros [33:16]: "You have to be in therapy."
Listeners call in with questions about dealing with addiction, maintaining sobriety, and navigating relationships while recovering.
1. Choosing Bridal Party Members
Caller [65:16]: "Should I have these girls be in my bridal party? Because, like, I think they would be really organized. They would have heartfelt speeches at the actual wedding. But I also think they would ruin the vibe of the bridal shower and, like, the bachelorette trip."
Stavros [80:31]: "So you have to decide, are they just not as fun? But that's not a big deal because they'll just go sleep early."
Advice Offered: Stavros and his guests emphasize the importance of prioritizing the bride's comfort and the overall vibe of the wedding festivities over obligations to long-standing friends. They suggest keeping the bridal party selective and focusing on those who genuinely support and enhance the bride's special day.
2. Handling a Creepy Dad on Instagram
Caller [87:00]: "My friend's dad watches all of my Instagram stories and recently moved it into the DMs, complimenting her. She's uncomfortable because her friend had a similar experience."
Stavros [90:47]: "But she wants to cut her down... tell your friend and make it clear."
Advice Offered: The hosts recommend blocking the individual and communicating with the friend about the inappropriate behavior. They stress the importance of setting boundaries and ensuring the friend is aware of the potential discomforting actions of her father.
3. Relationship and Sobriety Issues
Caller [97:18]: "I've been clean for almost six months, but my girlfriend wonders if we'll ever have intense sex again sober."
Stavros [101:14]: "You're in a nice spot... find somebody to confide in, probably your girlfriend."
Advice Offered: The discussion centers around embracing honest communication within the relationship, seeking therapy if needed, and exploring mutual interests in a supportive environment. The hosts encourage maintaining sobriety while finding new ways to connect intimately.
4. Coping with Grief During the Holidays
Caller [107:00]: "I lost my mom in 2020 and struggle with feeling sad during holidays despite having a supportive girlfriend and a welcoming Italian family."
Marie Faustin [110:23]: "But I also think we should keep talking about this with your girlfriend."
Advice Offered: The hosts suggest seeking therapy, allowing oneself to feel emotions without guilt, and communicating openly with loved ones. They emphasize that it's natural to feel sad during holidays after a significant loss and that support systems can aid in the healing process.
As the episode winds down, Stavros and his guests encourage listeners to seek support, whether through therapy, building healthier relationships, or adopting pets for companionship. They highlight upcoming segments like the "Twisted Shimmy" and tease future interactions, maintaining the podcast’s signature blend of humor and heartfelt advice.
Stavros [134:51]: "But you don't have to tell the whole family. Your girlfriend is going to tell everybody."
Marie Faustin [137:09]: "But I do think something bad to have a photoshoot and send it to Playboy."
Stavros [145:40]: "But I did try and get my family on Thanksgiving to go see Madea's Halloween, and they wouldn't go last year."
The hosts sign off with plans to continue offering relatable advice and sharing more twisted moments in future episodes.
Stavros [01:12]: "I didn't know that when traffic's good, you can get from Brooklyn to Queens in five minutes. That's actually new information to me."
Marie Faustin [07:15]: "I have a Red Hot Chili Peppers tattoo that's haunted my life."
Lisa Trager [32:55]: "There's shoes. There's gym shoes and feet as part of the pyramid next to salmon and broccoli."
Stavros [80:31]: "So you have to decide, are they just not as fun? But that's not a big deal because they'll just go sleep early."
Marie Faustin [110:38]: "And it's okay that it's hard."
Episode #107 of "Stavvy's World" continues to deliver the engaging, humorous, and insightful content listeners have come to expect. Through the genuine interactions between Stavros, Liza, and Marie, coupled with thoughtful listener advice segments, the podcast remains a go-to destination for those looking to unwind, laugh, and find relatable solutions to everyday challenges.
Note: This summary excludes all advertisement sections and retains only the core content and discussions relevant to the episode's primary themes.