#128 - Robert Oberst and JP McDade

Summary

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Stavvy's World Podcast Summary

Episode: #128 - Robert Oberst and JP McDade
Release Date: May 12, 2025
Host: Stavros Halkias
Guests: Robert Oberst, JP McDade
Description: A lively episode where Stavros Halkias sits down with former World’s Strongest Man Robert Oberst and his friend JP McDade to delve into their personal journeys, experiences touring, and tackle listener questions with humor and heartfelt advice.

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1. Introduction to the Guests

The episode kicks off with Stavros introducing Robert Oberst, a former top contender in the World's Strongest Man competitions, and JP McDade, his loyal sidekick on tour. The trio sets the stage for an off-the-grid conversation filled with power, loyalty, and a touch of humor.

Notable Quote:
Robert Oberst (00:19): “Welcome to the family.”

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2. Personal Journeys and Strongman Career

Robert shares his early life struggles, including a severe back injury that almost ended his strongman career. He recounts tragic moments, such as a brush with his daughter's safety that led him to prioritize his health over competing. Robert's dedication led him to achieve Top 10 placements at the World’s Strongest Man competitions twice, overcoming fears of being a “flash in the pan.”

Notable Quotes:
Robert Oberst (05:19): “I want to have the world’s strongest man platform as a springboard to what I want to do.”
Eldis (04:22): “Six, seven and a half. A hulking gentleman.”

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3. Touring Anecdotes and Experiences

The conversation shifts to their touring life, filled with wild stories from working as security at the Catalyst in Santa Cruz. Robert recounts intense brawls, encounters with notorious personalities like Willie Nelson, and the camaraderie among strongmen. They share humorous and sometimes harrowing tales of managing chaos on and off the tour bus.

Notable Quote:
Robert Oberst (47:06): “We had the most epic brawl I’ve ever been a part of.”

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4. Transition from Football to Strongman

Robert discusses his transition from a promising football career to strongman competitions. He details the physical and mental challenges he faced, including injuries and the pressure to perform consistently without jeopardizing his health. This segment highlights his resilience and strategic mindset in leveraging his strongman status for future endeavors beyond competitions.

Notable Quote:
Robert Oberst (52:07): “Most guys never make money, right?”

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5. Listener Questions and Advice Segment

Towards the end, the hosts and guest engage with listener questions, offering advice on personal relationships and self-improvement.

• Question 1: Is it weird to attend a comedy show alone?
  Advice: Stavros and Eldis encourage embracing solo experiences, emphasizing that attending events alone can be empowering and enjoyable.

• Question 2: Navigating friendships when friends bring significant others.
  Advice: They recommend open communication, setting boundaries, and finding a balance that respects both individual and group dynamics.

• Question 3: Coping with a recent breakup while living together.
  Advice: The trio advises establishing clear boundaries, seeking support from friends, and prioritizing personal well-being during the healing process.

Notable Quotes:
Eldis (67:54): “Just have a conversation where you really speak your feelings and feel heard and respected.”
Stavros Halkias (83:13): “Hands off my titties.”

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6. Closing Remarks and Final Stories

In a humorous and relaxed closure, the hosts share light-hearted banter and final anecdotes, reinforcing the camaraderie and genuine friendship among them. Robert reflects on his admiration for legends like Andre the Giant and Roddy Piper, intertwining personal respect with entertaining tales.

Notable Quote:
Robert Oberst (130:31): “He did you a favor.”

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Key Takeaways

• Resilience and Adaptation: Robert Oberst's journey from football to strongman showcases the importance of adapting to life’s challenges and finding new paths to success.
• Camaraderie and Support: The strong bond among the hosts and guests highlights the value of friendship and mutual support in navigating the highs and lows of competitive life.
• Open Communication: Addressing personal and relationship issues through honest dialogue is crucial for maintaining healthy connections.
• Embracing Solo Experiences: Attending events alone can be a fulfilling and empowering experience, fostering personal growth and independence.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Robert Oberst (05:19): “I want to have the world’s strongest man platform as a springboard to what I want to do.”
• Eldis (04:22): “Six, seven and a half. A hulking gentleman.”
• Robert Oberst (47:06): “We had the most epic brawl I’ve ever been a part of.”
• Eldis (67:54): “Just have a conversation where you really speak your feelings and feel heard and respected.”
• Stavros Halkias (83:13): “Hands off my titties.”

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This episode of Stavvy's World offers a blend of inspiring stories, humorous anecdotes, and practical advice, making it a must-listen for fans and newcomers alike. Robert Oberst and JP McDade bring depth and authenticity to the conversation, providing valuable insights into the world of strongman competitions and the importance of personal resilience and strong friendships.

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Transcript

[Stavros Halkias]

Step into the world of power, loyalty and luck.

[Robert Oberst]

I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse.

[Eldis]

With family, cannolis and spins mean everything.

[Robert Oberst]

Now you want to get mixed up.

[Eldis]

In the family business? Introducing the [e-mail] test your luck in the shadowy world of the Godfather slot.

[Robert Oberst]

Someday, I will call upon you to do a service for me.

[Eldis]

Play the Godfather now at champacasino. Com.

[Robert Oberst]

Welcome to the family.

[Eldis]

No purchase necessary VGW Group void where.

[Robert Oberst]

Prohibited by law 21/ terms and conditions apply.

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[Eldis]

Welcome everybody to Stavi's World. 904-800. Stop call in to solve your problems. We're in the mobile command center. Stavi's World is mobile. We are in an undisclosed location.

[Stavros Halkias]

Off the grid.

[Eldis]

We're off the grid. You'll never find us.

[Robert Oberst]

The address is.

[Eldis]

Yeah, come to whoever's in this Airbnb months after we've left. You know, this is a little. This is from the vault, folks. We're. We the. We're. This is the beginning of the tour. We have. We're pumped to have on the couch. Robert Obers is here. El tryin out a new cheer. It's a little.

[Robert Oberst]

Appreciate it.

[Eldis]

It's a little more diffuse. It's not as the other one is like a stadium. This is like eight guys are happy robbers here.

[Unknown]

I know, I know.

[Robert Oberst]

I think that's more like realistic.

[Eldis]

Yes. We have. We have Robert here, of course, Jimmy Mack, JP McDade is here. He's opening on this leg of the tour for much of the beginning and the end. So we figure, let's get him. Let's get him in here Ed McMahon style. He's the sidekick whenever he's here. And we're throwing that blind drunk. Yeah, he's so. He's really. I told him, you can be on the tour, but you have to relapse.

[Stavros Halkias]

I said, anything for Mr. H. I'm like.

[Eldis]

I'm like, JP, you get. You want. You want this $85 a night, or do you not want this $85 a night?

[Stavros Halkias]

Bring me my medicine.

[Eldis]

Do you want to split bunk beds with eldest every night for $85 or not? This is a. This is. This is a real show business opportunity for you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Human nightlight.

[Eldis]

I stand and flashlight from the inside.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hey, I wear many hats.

[Robert Oberst]

The booze helps now.

[Stavros Halkias]

Loosens it right up.

[Eldis]

Yeah, we're pumped to have Robert here, but thanks for coming, dude.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I'm excited to be here, man.

[Eldis]

Thanks for having me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Three strong guys.

[Eldis]

Three equally strong men on a podcast.

[Robert Oberst]

A lot of sexual energy on that right now.

[Eldis]

It is awesome. Because everyone on this tour, I. You know, I'm. Well, let's say 57. You know what? I. I am actually f. Here's something that annoys me. I actually am 57, because everybody who says they're 57 is 5 6.

[Stavros Halkias]

I like that you said like a negotiation. Like, we'll call it five.

[Eldis]

Cuz I was about to be like, I'm 58. But that's me lying, right? Even though you give yourself a quarter. Even though with shoes on. Look, when I go to the doctor, they weigh me with shit with my pants on. Why don't I get to say five eight with shoes on.

[Stavros Halkias]

You get it on the other end.

[Eldis]

Anyway, the point is, I'm five seven. I have no. You know what? I don't even give a fuck. I have no shame about it. It just pisses me off because everyone who says they're five seven is five six. But on this tour, eldest is six five. Big Dick Saxon, who you guys have met on the Patreon Busboys Volume one. He. How tall are you sacks? Six five. JP is six seven. And Robert is not only gigantic.

[Robert Oberst]

Six, eight, six, seven and a half.

[Eldis]

Six, seven, eight. Wow. What a gentleman. Yeah. You know what?

[Robert Oberst]

You know what?

[Eldis]

I'm five seven and a half. How about that?

[Robert Oberst]

People get really crazy about it. Like the way that. That line at 5 7. Like, guys, really?

[Eldis]

Yeah. You don't want to be. You don't want to be. It's real. And some people. Some. Some might argue it's five' eight and they're wrong. Five. Thank you.

[Stavros Halkias]

It depends on the humidity, huh?

[Eldis]

Yeah, it depends. Depends on how high. High my hair is.

[Robert Oberst]

Good. I honestly, if it makes you feel any better, you're all the same to me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you, dude.

[Eldis]

I appreciate it. Yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

We're all. You could be 61.

[Eldis]

That's true. And I love.

[Stavros Halkias]

They're all basically first graders.

[Eldis]

Yeah. To Robert. Yeah. Six, seven and a half. A hulking gentleman. Top top 10. A former. You got top eight, right?

[Robert Oberst]

I got top 10 twice.

[Eldis]

Top 10 twice. World. World's strongest man.

[Robert Oberst]

Over the span of. Of. Of six or seven years too. So, like, I was in the top 10 for a while. So.

[Eldis]

Wow. You had strange power.

[Robert Oberst]

It was one thing that I really fought for too, cuz like at the beginning of my career, I jumped off and did really, really good. And I was terrified of being a flash in the pan.

[Eldis]

Right, right, right.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, destroyed myself to make sure that didn't happen.

[Eldis]

Oh, yeah. You. Your. What's up right now?

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, everything.

[Eldis]

I think the most.

[Robert Oberst]

The most messed up stuff is probably like my. My back and my. My ankle. My back. I have to be really careful about. My back is. It's. It's. What made me stop was like, I was. Not to start this off on a super sour note, but my daughter.

[Eldis]

Suicidal. He wanted to end it all.

[Robert Oberst]

No, my daughter was in the crib. She's. She's 16 months now. And so she was in the crib and I went in there to get her out and my back locked up and I fell on the floor. And I was on the floor for like two hours.

[Eldis]

Holy.

[Robert Oberst]

And I couldn't get up.

[Eldis]

She's like, I'll never respect you. All those muscles, and you can't protect me.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, that's what you worry about. But yeah, so I made sure. I immediately I was like, I'm. I'm never gonna do anything to put my back at risk. So I do all safety stuff now.

[Eldis]

That happened to me once because I pulled a doorknob too hard that literally I threw my back up. Be like, ah. And then I had to just lay down one day straight.

[Robert Oberst]

It's horrible.

[Eldis]

When your back goes down, there's nothing.

[Robert Oberst]

You can do to get around it. It's not what you want.

[Eldis]

We need exoskeletons.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my.

[Eldis]

We need that, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

We got to evolve into some armor.

[Robert Oberst]

Give us, like, the robot additives now.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, like, get on it body modifications. I want rocket thrusters.

[Eldis]

You want thrusters? That would be sick.

[Stavros Halkias]

Trying to make sure I can dunk. When I'm 40, I'm going to need to be rocket aided.

[Eldis]

I just want a back brace. I want. I want something to. I want the back brace not only to help my back but also to when I fuck. Just to thrust for me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

That way I can. And then obviously I think it goes without saying, you know a splint, some kind of mechanical splint around my. To keep it hard. But it's still my. I don't want a mechanical. I want my to feel the pleasure. But I need around it with like.

[Stavros Halkias]

An add on that pinches your leg so you last longer.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like you feel like you feel.

[Eldis]

I maybe you can have metal around the shaft but the head is my head. So even if it's soft, the metal pushes my soft. It's like a mar in and out.

[Robert Oberst]

It sounds dangerous. Just, just first thought, well we'll figure it out.

[Eldis]

You know somebody's got to be on this.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I guarantee somebody's on this.

[Eldis]

Yeah, it's crazy. We haven't figured that part out yet. But yeah. Yeah, dude. Not only the world strongest man, but very funny. On the righteous gemstones. That's. We became friends. I was promoting my special while you were on. I think we both kind of discovered each other's work at the kind of the same time. Even though me and my brothers were. We were like when we growing up we loved watching World Strong so I'm sure we cuz. But. But you know, you're. You're like. We were. We were younger. We weren't like keyed into it. It's just like a fun thing to watch. So it's like I'm sure we watched you pick up gigantic stones and throw them over your head. You know what I mean? But like because we. That was always a fun, a fun thing to watch and like pretend like oh yeah, one day we could do that.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, like that's its most like marketable feature is when people are like flipping channels or whatever. You don't.

[Eldis]

It's incredible.

[Robert Oberst]

A guy pulling a bus.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

You stop for a second.

[Eldis]

A 400 pound guy with abs pulling a bus and you're like what the fudge is going on? Like it sounds like. Like watching you guys compete feels like you're reading something from mythology where it's like you know, the king brought the. You know, the unstoppable giant to smash all the Canaanites or whatever the that's.

[Robert Oberst]

Really where it started from. Too strong, man. They say it originated in Scotland. Scotland was not allowed to have weapons or really train and stuff like that because England sucks.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And so the Brits. Yeah, all of them.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a common through line in basically all of world history. Like the English were being dicks.

[Eldis]

They're like, no, you can't have a gun. We're going to go have sex with each other and polish our muskets. And then you guys just. And then the Scottish had to get strong.

[Stavros Halkias]

As we're going to get out some big poles.

[Eldis]

We're going to kill you with this.

[Robert Oberst]

That's what it was. It was, it was rocks and stones and then, and then one part of the, the competition would be like, you had to be able to run to a certain place with rocks and then run back. That's where it all came from.

[Eldis]

Yeah, just pure ass brute strength. So cool.

[Robert Oberst]

Who's going to protect the king without any weapons?

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sick, dude. Yeah, that's it. It's such an interesting thing to get, like, because you're right, it's the most channel flipping. You're never going to switch. But it's like, it's crazy to think that that was just so your life, like, to most people it's like a cool thing you stumble on and you watch like four times a year.

[Stavros Halkias]

Stand up comedy.

[Eldis]

Yeah. It's basically. Yeah, most people don't give a fuck about stand. Most people go to like four stand up shows in their whole life and, and three of them are like, you know, bachelor party. Bachelorette party.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

But like, that's crazy. Like, what even is it like to be. How do you, like, what are the prelims for getting into, you know, what's the open mic version of doing World's Strongest Man? Is it just you go to a fucking parking lot and start lifting Corollas?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, it's all over, all over. America, England, Canada. It's huge. They've got different styles depending on where you're at in the globe. Like the Middle east and stuff does a lot of like rock lifting, you know, but at the amateur level, that's what it is. You pay, you sign up, you, you go and you'll see these guys. I mean, I saw a guy.

[Eldis]

I've.

[Robert Oberst]

Seen guys really hurt themselves really badly, really horrifically. And they were just like, they had a 9 to 5. Like they were here for fun and paying to compete and like for the rest of their lives. They walk weird or whatever.

[Stavros Halkias]

Their shoulders and Their hips are now fused together, no longer have a torso.

[Robert Oberst]

I know. I can't tell you how many guys I know who have their low back fuse.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. You know, a lot of her.

[Robert Oberst]

Very common.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I don't need a spot for this Volkswagen. I'm good. I got this.

[Robert Oberst]

My back doesn't bend. Yeah, it's a lot of that. But the. The guys who do it to be in shape and just have fun, it is really cool. Like, there's the camaraderie in strongman is, you know, it's unmatched. It's not like you're going to go to a CrossFit gym. I mean, and if you're really in shape, really jacked, you can go to a CrossFit gym and fit in great. And. And I'm being general. I'm sure there's somebody out there that's like, obviously that's not the case for them.

[Eldis]

Sure, sure.

[Robert Oberst]

But I mean, in general, when you do an amateur strongman show, there's just all these really big people that kind of lift. Seriously. But it's mostly for fun. And you're just cheering each other on, having a blast.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Yeah. It's just so funny to do that, like, for no money. And to do it and like to pay. To pay to potentially have no, you know, lose a couple vertebrae or whatever the fuck is nuts. Dude.

[Robert Oberst]

It's crazy. And there's a ton of people that do it, too.

[Eldis]

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[Robert Oberst]

By the way, I. I was a bouncer for a long time.

[Eldis]

Hell, yeah. Where were you bouncing?

[Robert Oberst]

Places. But this. This place, it was called the Catalyst. It's in Santa Cruz, and it's a small concert venue and a bar. So, like, I. I did security for, like, Willie Nelson and B.B. king. And.

[Stavros Halkias]

Shout out to Willie.

[Robert Oberst]

A bunch of really cool people.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Friend of the podcast, Willie Nelson. Shout out to him.

[Robert Oberst]

I feel so bad. When I. When I worked with Willie, I was playing football at the time, and he offered to smoke weed with me, and I turned him down.

[Eldis]

Oh, my God.

[Robert Oberst]

My mom got mad at me.

[Stavros Halkias]

My mom was so mad at me. You're throwing your life away.

[Robert Oberst]

And I Honestly, from that, he was the sweetest dude. He's like a. He's a little older guy. He came out, was really nice, met everybody and saw what he had, what he had to do, where he was going to be. And I'm always. I'm the biggest guy, so I'm the guy who's with the talent. And it's like he was going back on the bus and he's like, you want to have smoke? And I was like, oh. I was getting tested at the time.

[Eldis]

Oh, my God.

[Robert Oberst]

It's one of my biggest regrets.

[Eldis]

You should be able to tell the guy testing it was like, hey, man, here's a picture of me smoking weed with Willie Nelson. Can I get a mulligan on this one?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I wish I would.

[Eldis]

Oh, my God. Were you. So that was in Santa Cruz. Were you playing? What was the school year?

[Robert Oberst]

I was done. I was. I was trying to play professional. So I was. I was working with the San Jose Saber Cats at Time the.

[Eldis]

Okay.

[Robert Oberst]

And that's Arena.

[Eldis]

Oh, hell yeah, dude. Arena's another dude. You're the. You're like a. Like, fun to catch on ESPN3 All Star, you know what I mean? Like, arena football is strong.

[Stavros Halkias]

Playing the World Series of Poker triple crap.

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, man. But yeah, the thing about arena, dude.

[Eldis]

For the saber catch, you should have smoked weed, man. Of course.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, this is. This is the worst part. The Arena. By the two years before I got to arena, the guys were making an average of like 300k a year. Well, that was the average. And then when I got there, the ultimate reason I didn't stay or do anything with them was because guys were, like, working at McDonald's when they weren't at practice. And so it was. It was just too much. My body was already like, my. My ankles really started to get messed up from football. Like, it was just. I just kept re. Injuring the same thing.

[Eldis]

Your whole life, you must have just been just like gigantic and beating. Beating yourself up doing. Playing football, I guess, your whole life.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, so. So at first, I was a big drama kid. I was. I really love. I wrote a plays and I. I had, like.

[Eldis]

I love that.

[Robert Oberst]

I had a little video camera that you put the VHS in and record. And I made. I made probably 10 spoofs trying to copy Scary Movie. I love that stuff. I had 10 siblings.

[Eldis]

Like, I had. Oh, my.

[Robert Oberst]

All the characters and everything. Like, I made my sister chase me. We live behind an apple orchard. And I made her chase me through the apple orchard.

[Eldis]

You literally just sound like a character in a fairy tale. The giant that lived. The baby giant that tried to get his 10 siblings to make plays.

[Stavros Halkias]

Apple Orchard put all 10 siblings in a big basket and carry them to school every day.

[Eldis]

That's nuts.

[Robert Oberst]

I was obsessed with that stuff at first, and I was really into drama. And then going into high school, I'd signed up and I'd been in several plays. Like, I got to lead in a few, which is crazy.

[Eldis]

Of Mice and Men.

[Robert Oberst]

No, I didn't pet the rabbits. I didn't pet the rabbits. I got to do Jack and the Beanstalk, one of the Three Kings. I wrote. I wrote a rap for the Three Kings, and then I made them let me do it in the play. I was like, I'm not doing it if I don't get to do my rap.

[Eldis]

Negotiating. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

But then high school came along, and I was. I was like getting involved in everything. And then one of the teachers just made fun of me about trying out for. For the lead in A play. And then it was like, like I shattered confidence from it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh my God. It's crazy how much one comment from like an teacher.

[Eldis]

Right. Just a guy who was just too stupid to get a real job. Like wasn't a good teacher.

[Robert Oberst]

Right.

[Eldis]

Like it's always the shittiest. It's like any. And looking back, it's probably some 25 year old.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Who was just a piece of. And who's insecure and honestly on some level jealous because you were huge. And like he wanted to play football and he got cut.

[Robert Oberst]

And then that's when I started football. I wasn't gonna play. I was, I was all drama. And then when that happened, I went out and did football and then like literally just I blew up and started like being really good really fast.

[Eldis]

Yeah. That's all. I mean that's so funny, dude. I had, I had the same experience but like with obviously different results. Like I was a total drama kid and like did. Me and Eldest were in plays in elementary school together. The. What was the clown one?

[Robert Oberst]

Ambiguously Gay Clowns.

[Eldis]

Yeah, we did. We put that on. We put on a production of the Ambiguously Gay Duo in fourth grade.

[Stavros Halkias]

But you wrote it into a beautiful feature length drama that explores their relationship.

[Robert Oberst]

That was a good cartoon though.

[Eldis]

It was a great. That was funny. Yeah, it was clowns, right?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Did we do anything else or were you going by then?

[Unknown]

I think there was like at least one or two other plays. I just don't remember.

[Eldis]

Remember Clowns was very memorable though, for sure. And. And then in middle school I think I like auditioned and. Or like they were doing Charlie Brown and I think like I, I think you know, it was probably a shoe in. I mean who's supposed to be playing Charlie Brown? But I had that moment. I. It was. Nobody had to make me feel self conscious. I should have, I had, I had the confidence. You should have had where I was like, what am I doing for John? I'm a fucking athlete. I was just this size. Like I've been 57 since I was in sixth grade. And I've been. And you know, Maybe I was £200, but I was like, I was like, well I'm gonna play fucking football and basket. I'm going pro. And I quit drama in sixth grade. Cause I was like, yeah dude, I'm a fucking jock. I'm a cool jock now. But I remember like it is, it is being a little ass kid and being like, I want to be on stage. You know what I mean? It's so, it's so fun. I want to go back, though, because. For the. Because I want to get a little more about like, you as a little kid. Because that's fascinating because you must have been also just big as hell from the jump, right?

[Robert Oberst]

Not. Not till, like, I had a crazy growth spurt between freshman and sophomore year. I was so, like. Like starting, like, maybe fourth, fifth grade, I got really chubby, sure. But I was short. And then I worked at a Boy Scout camp.

[Eldis]

Okay.

[Robert Oberst]

Catalina Island.

[Eldis]

Oh, nice. Catalina.

[Unknown]

Very nice.

[Eldis]

Catalina Wine Mixer.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. So I was there for six, seven weeks or something like that. And while I was gone working at camp, I grew seven inches in a six weeks. I came home, my mom, like, started bawling. She was like, my boy. She was freaking out. Like, my. My brother Sean, who I had given. I hadn't seen him for, like, a couple years. He walked up to me and introduced himself, my older brother.

[Stavros Halkias]

So the camp got shut down. They were putting HGH in the burgers.

[Eldis]

That's nuts.

[Robert Oberst]

So, yeah. So, like, I had, like, just crazy deep red stretch marks all of a sudden and all this stuff.

[Eldis]

Did that hurt? Did you? Yeah, I remember werewolf transformation.

[Robert Oberst]

Exactly like that. I remember. So I don't remember almost anything other than a sunburn. I got a real bad sunburn that I'll remember. And then I remember laying in the tents at night and just rubbing my legs. And I remember the guy. The guy next to us, next to me had a Playboy that was, like, under his pillow, and I saw it. So, like, I snagged that. And at like, 2 in the morning, I'm, like, rubbing my legs and looking at this Playboy to distract me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jesus, dude, that's not going like an inch a week. That's.

[Robert Oberst]

It was super painful.

[Eldis]

But before that, you were just, like, a chubby kid who was, like, very into drama. And how do we get 10 siblings? It, like, religiously.

[Robert Oberst]

No, my mom. My mom had a rough childhood. And so, like, when she started having kids, she just, like, wanted all of them. And then when that. So, like, my mom was told she couldn't have any more kids. And then she got pregnant with me.

[Eldis]

Oh, wow.

[Robert Oberst]

And then had me and then adopted three more.

[Eldis]

Wow.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, and so, like, my mom was just like, always just trying to take in everybody, which is where all my confidence came from. Like, I'd be the chubby kid. Like, I'm Augustus Gloop.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Like. Like, pinch my cheeks and tell me I could do anything. And so, like, that's really where it came from. I was like, I just believed her.

[Eldis]

Do whatever, you know, and you might. I mean, did everybody had to have bunk beds? There's no way everybody got. You must have slept in bunk beds.

[Robert Oberst]

A good question.

[Eldis]

So.

[Robert Oberst]

So when. When I was getting into high school and we'd moved back to Watsonville, we lived in a three bedroom house and we only had electricity there for the first 30 days.

[Eldis]

Oh my God.

[Robert Oberst]

So this is, this is the craziest thing. Looking back as, as an adult, like, my dad made good money. He worked for a great company and like Quinn Caterpillar, like Caterpillar, the tractors and stuff. My dad was a, like a really smart engineer, worked on all that kind of stuff and like then started working on. What's it called when you lose power and the power.

[Stavros Halkias]

The generators.

[Robert Oberst]

Generators and stuff for like hospitals or prisons and all that kind of stuff. So he was, he was a smart guy, really needed, made good money and we were broke, like had none.

[Eldis]

Did he have a second family with eight kids?

[Stavros Halkias]

No.

[Robert Oberst]

No. What happened is, is he had a. He had a wife that spent everything faster than you can.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And so like I remember like we had like no power for three years until like, well, on the weekends my dad would drive home. You ever seen those?

[Eldis]

They have you in a big like wheel running to power the house.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm running the dishwasher.

[Robert Oberst]

Heave. Heave. If you on the road, you'll see like a Caterpillar truck drive by. It's a big white truck and you'll see it's got like a little crane on it. All of those trucks have little generators. So on the weekends we would plug that into the house and we would have like maybe the TV or whatever. Like sometimes if we didn't run anything, the hot water heater would work, you know?

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Like it was like that forever, but like, it sounds so crazy now, but.

[Eldis]

You don't know any better in the moment.

[Robert Oberst]

Man, we were making those movies and I was having fun and we were doing Wrestlemania on the trampoline and like, like all that, like playing baseball with. With every apple in the orchard.

[Eldis]

Right, right, right. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I don't think I've ever had as much fun as I did when we were dirt poor.

[Eldis]

For sure. Yeah. Especially when you're a kid, you really have no frame of reference.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

You know, and it's like, I don't know, what was the school like? Did they, did they let you know you were poor at school?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, in high school. Yes. Because in high school I'm from Watsonville and if you know Santa Cruz, Watsonville is like east side.

[Eldis]

Like, sure.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, not, not New York east side. It's like LA east side. Yeah, it's, it's, it's the lower end of the, the probably financial pool of the county. And I went to school in Aptos. Like, I got in trouble in Watsonville and I had to go to Aptos High. And Aptos is the wealthiest area in Santa Cruz. And so, like, I remember all these kids. I remember this girl.

[Eldis]

It's got, it's, it's families whose dad, like, it's the guy who invented that shitty, like, Sherpa hoodie. It's like the drug rug. That's the number one drug rug princess. Yeah. In, in Santa Cruz, that' number one money makers. Like rasta hats in those. And black light posters. Yeah, Black light hemp posters. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

It's a lot of like, if you're kind of like an old school liberal and you made a ton of money and you retired, that's one of the spots to go.

[Eldis]

Yeah. And it's pretty hippie dippy town from what I know.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I loved it. Like, yeah, it was so I, I first place. The Banana Slugs. Yeah, the UCSC slugs.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's an awesome mascot.

[Robert Oberst]

And like, it was. I first left, I went to Arkansas for school and it was like traveling back in time, like, it was crazy to me that like, like there was a club that we used to go to called Curtis, and the guys on the team said that was the black club. And so, like, literally, like, it was almost like it was like going into the 50s. Coming from California, I was like, not used to that.

[Eldis]

You're like, this is ridiculous. I mean, at least you can run the lights in the black club. At least you guys have a refrigerator that works. Of the black club.

[Robert Oberst]

It's always the best when you're a big white dude and you're the only white dude there. Oh, it's awesome.

[Eldis]

Yeah. You know, folks, I wasn't always living the glamorous lifestyle of a playboy, international comedian, actor, podcaster. You know, I had to make those dollars stretch back in the day, boy, I had a little money and some apps and I would need it quick and I would need my money fast. And sometimes I get hit with these processing fees where it would take an extra three or four days just to get my money. I didn't have that time early on. I was an adopter and I still am to this Day of Cash app. They don't got none of that bullshit. We're talking. Get your money fast, safe, easy. I swap back and forth whenever I want to throw a little something to my. You know, my brother just had a kid. I want to get the little guy something nice. I cash at my bro a little couple coins, get the boy some diapers, get him some formula. Uncle Stavi's got him. Cash app coming right through. And direct. It's safe, easy, fast way to send, receive and transfer money to family and friends. You get started so fast, I thought there was a big barrier to entry. There's none. Just enter your phone or email. No bank necessary. No bank account needed. We'll go straight through that. No waiting. Your money shows up right away. That's what I love. I send my brother a couple dollars. My little nephew, he's got a new tracksuit that afternoon. You know what I'm saying? And it's secure and safe. Cash App has your back. If you're about to send money to somebody, sketchy little warning pops up. Hey, buddy, you sure about this? You sure you want to do this, little buddy? Be like me. Be like the. The gentleman here at Stavi Baby Enterprises. So a little cash around on Cash app for a limited time only new Cash app users can use our exclusive code to earn some additional cash. For real? No catch. Just download Cash App and sign up. Use our exclusive referral code, Stavi S T A V Y in your profile. Send five bucks to a friend within 14 days and you'll get $10 dropped right into your account. Terms apply. That's money. That's Cash app. Just put Stavi S T a v V Y in your profile. Extra 10 bucks from the podcast. Not a bad deal. You went to play football in Arkansas?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I went to. I. I ended up. So before my senior year. This is a lot.

[Eldis]

No, I love it. If you want to.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I don't mind. I don't mind. Before senior year, my dad was schizophrenic and he had a lot of issues. A lot, a lot of different stuff. And him and my mom split.

[Eldis]

My mom, she didn't have too many responsibilities. 10 kids. Even if it was a sound mind, he would go fucking crazy. You're plugging in a fucking extension cord to make tea on the weekends. He had a lot going on.

[Robert Oberst]

You know what's funny is you were smart enough to realize that it was off an extension cord. So he had. He had like, a break.

[Eldis]

Okay. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Towards. Towards senior year, and it all went haywire. So, like, I ended up being homeless for about three years, and then Bounced around and tried to figure stuff out.

[Eldis]

18 to 21 kind of.

[Robert Oberst]

Yep.

[Eldis]

And Dennis Rodman? Same thing. Dennis, really? Yeah, he was, he was, he was like homeless in that he, like. And then he play. Started playing juco. And then he like. Yeah, he went from homeless to junior college. Had. I think he also had a growth spurt. I don't.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, he did. He was like 6:1 when he was crazy. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. Dennis Rodman's a man too.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

So, yeah, bounce around. And I just made a bunch of mistakes. And then like, I actually, I was done with football. I had quit. I laughed.

[Eldis]

I won't even choke the coach, maybe, or what. Yeah, something like that.

[Robert Oberst]

Flip it anyways.

[Stavros Halkias]

Flip the team bus.

[Robert Oberst]

You nearly caught me off guard there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sorry, man.

[Eldis]

Just an educated hunch.

[Robert Oberst]

So I got a job. I moved back to Santa Cruz and considered myself a coke dealer for like two months.

[Eldis]

Hell yeah, dude.

[Robert Oberst]

And it was silly and stupid and that stuff.

[Eldis]

Like, I mean, I gotta be honest, for where you were at the time, being huge. Being in Santa Cruz, like, if there's place to deal, like for your circumstances, that's not a horrible, like, looking, Looking at the math and being like.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it helps to be huge because it's like, how much do I owe you for this eight ball? It's like $500.

[Eldis]

Yeah. And it's a hippie town. It's like. It'd be different if you were like a coke dealer in like a major city, Right?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, totally. Totally different vibes.

[Eldis]

I kind of. I mean, I'm glad you didn't, you know, keep doing it, but it wasn't the worst idea. Let's give you some credit. I'm sure some bad stuff happened.

[Robert Oberst]

I remember doing some stupid stuff, but.

[Stavros Halkias]

It'S a natural byproduct of all that stuff that happens.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. So I left. I, I, and realized I needed to get out of Santa Cruz, so I, My, I moved. My, My dad had just had another child with someone else, and him and my mom were back together. And that was his issue.

[Eldis]

I just go out, clear my head, have another kid.

[Robert Oberst]

It was a lot, a lot, lot. Like I said, I'm leaving a lot out too. And so I'm, I'm. I moved back in with them and just weaned myself, like, completely. I just. No rehab, no nothing. I just cut everything. I was on a lot of pills at the time too. Football really got me into pills. And I stacked backerboard outside of Reno for about a year, which in, in now.

[Eldis]

We went from fairy tale to Johnny Cash song. I was stacking backboards in Reno for a year. That was good. Yeah, yeah. So that fresh off pain pill stacking backboards in Reno, dude, it's truly a mythological life that you've led. That's crazy.

[Robert Oberst]

So I did that, and I was. I was like about. Just. Just about a year deep, and I got a phone call from a buddy of mine who was going to school at Western Oregon University. And he was like, man, the coach here says you've got eligibility.

[Eldis]

Whoa. Nice.

[Robert Oberst]

And I was like, for real? And he's like, yeah, he's going to pay for your school. Get out here. So I took my twin mattress from my house.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I. I tied it to my roof. I broke it on the way up. I drove from Reno all the way up to five, all the way into Salem, Oregon, and got off there and headed east, west and stayed. I finished school at Monmouth Western Oregon, and I was just really appreciative. They gave me an opportunity, and that's. That's, like, where football ended for me.

[Eldis]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

And so this was a super long way to get back in.

[Eldis]

But it was huge. It was huge to, like, kind of get you just a little stability, a little. Like, I had.

[Robert Oberst]

I had a place to live, I had food.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Like, to me, that was everything. And then I could kind of. You're not living off of crazy momentum.

[Eldis]

Yes.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, when starts rolling and you don't take a moment to step back, like, you can really end up in some spots.

[Eldis]

For sure. For sure. No, it's crazy. I mean, I. I definitely. I mean that. And your life. Feeling like your life is being dictated by forces outside of you is a really scary thing. So that. That sounds like, you know, it was. Even if. Even though you like it, made you get pill, you know, addicted to pills or whatever. Well, in the beginning, it's like football, you know, sounded like a nice little salvation and just some regularity. And then from there, you were kind of. Is that where the strongman stuff. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

So just the pills thing. Really funny. When I first started coming off pills, I was in my college dorm, and.

[Eldis]

This is in Arkansas. Where's this?

[Robert Oberst]

I don't want to say.

[Eldis]

Okay. Yeah, we don't have.

[Robert Oberst]

We were in a college dorm.

[Eldis]

In a college dorm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. College dorm. Somewhere in the continental United States, maybe.

[Robert Oberst]

Too specific.

[Eldis]

Could have been Hawaii or Alaska. We'll give it all 50 states in hell. We'll throw in Puerto Rico.

[Stavros Halkias]

One of the hemispheres.

[Eldis]

Yeah. So I was dorm. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

In a college Dorm. And I'm coming off, and I remember I was laying in my. In my little bed looking at the roof, and it was, like, moving and being weird and, like, really having dts, like, hard. And the running back was my roommate. And he goes, man, are you jerking off over there? And then he opens the door to the dorm. He goes, he's in here jerking off. And I'm like. Like.

[Eldis]

You'Re just getting off pill. Having, like, oxy withdrawals.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, jerking off.

[Eldis]

I mean, I. Getting off, like, pills with a roommate is a tough scene, dude. In a little dorm, in those plastic mattresses, like those little ramen noodles on.

[Stavros Halkias]

A hot plate, trying to.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, in Alaska, they got brick.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Nice. Yeah. Of course. Where you were. Yeah. There's a moose outside the window for.

[Robert Oberst]

To answer the simple question you asked about an hour ago.

[Eldis]

No, no, no. This is perfect.

[Robert Oberst]

Bouncing at a club. The catalyst. I was doing security for a lot of people. Cube. Snoop. Yeah, it was sick.

[Eldis]

And you're. And you're in your, like, mid-20s here.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. Low 20s. I'm, like, not even 20, 24 or something.

[Eldis]

Like, okay. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And a buddy of mine was obsessed with Strongman, and he'd been trying to do it for, like, eight years. And he was always the guy that was, like, my backup or whatever. On a football team.

[Eldis]

Sure. Damn, that's tough.

[Robert Oberst]

Especially because he wanted to be a pro. Strong man. Yeah.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And I went pro in less than a year.

[Eldis]

Yeah. And then you married the woman he was in love with.

[Robert Oberst]

No.

[Eldis]

His dad calls you and tells you how much he respects you.

[Robert Oberst]

No, no. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's got a lot of really cool qualities. I don't want him to feel bad. Like, he's the man. And he helped me a lot. Like, he taught me everything. And when I first got started, the first day, I did a log press, which is, like, if you know what a log press is. Like, we used to use trees, but now we use, like, a cylinder.

[Eldis]

Yes. I've seen those things.

[Robert Oberst]

So we. I had the record in that for a while, and so I did that on the first day, and I pressed it, and I beat the amateur record by £5. And I put it down, and I looked at my buddy, and I was like, was that any good? Get the fuck out of here.

[Eldis]

Oh, that's brutal for that guy. But he's doing well.

[Robert Oberst]

He's doing great. Yeah, he's got. He's got a wife, and he's doing great, man. He's Living the normal life like I should have.

[Eldis]

Of course. Yeah, yeah. That's the other thing is, like, success in these fields is still not good.

[Robert Oberst]

No.

[Eldis]

Like, you don't live a good life. Like, it's so much better just being upper middle class.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. Have a consistent paycheck.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Insurance.

[Eldis]

Totally. A couple of, you know.

[Stavros Halkias]

How much does that log weigh?

[Robert Oberst]

It depends. It depends. So my record. I broke the record in Australia with Arnold Schwarzenegger. He was, like, right there watching me.

[Eldis]

I broke. So cool.

[Robert Oberst]

It was badass. It was in kilos, and I think it was like, 477 and pounds. Something like that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jesus.

[Robert Oberst]

Like 2, 217 kilos or something like that. It might be off. Don't get mad at me, Internet. It might be off by a few pounds.

[Eldis]

So elders do a little producing. Man.

[Robert Oberst]

Check out really quick, too, since you brought him up.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Everybody that comes on this show just goes on and on about how grotesque and crazy eldest looks. I'm an avid listener. I listen while I train, while I'm doing stuff. So I don't watch. I listen. I've heard Elvis's voice a million times.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I was expecting you to be so much more hideous. You just look like a normal dude, man. Like, I think that's certain.

[Unknown]

Someone's messaging.

[Stavros Halkias]

We've really painted a narrative here.

[Robert Oberst]

If you look crazy, then what do I look like? Much more exaggerated version of you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. You guys are members of the same tribe.

[Eldis]

But that's the thing. You're incre. You're one of the literal world's strongest men, and he's just a guy. And you guys look similar. That's the issue.

[Robert Oberst]

I think you look good, brother. Way better than I was expecting.

[Stavros Halkias]

For sure.

[Unknown]

I think you look good. Way too many people tell me that. They're like. They're like, oh, eldest. And that doesn't be like, fat. Like, stop.

[Eldis]

Okay. All right.

[Unknown]

That's just like, stop.

[Eldis]

That would be the negative thing to happen to you.

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, man. Wait till they're on the bus for a long time.

[Eldis]

You w. You know what, elders? That's fine. I carry this. I'm like. I'm basically like God. I'm like Jesus in that. I'm basically like Jesus in that. You know, I'm dying for every fat guy sins, you know, throw them all on me. I'll be fat as shit. I'll be short. I'll be bald. I will. I will take these slings and arrows for the rest of you. That's how I look at it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For they know not what they do. They do. They know not how fat they are or something? No, not at all. I just said by accident. I am like, God. I meant Jesus right there.

[Robert Oberst]

Stop it. You're gonna be on one of those clips. You know they make all those videos now about all the comedians.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

It's like a market now.

[Eldis]

It's very funny to be that obsessed with, like, truly, we're some of the dumbest people on earth.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And there's people who. There's like a whole clips ecosystem.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, there's like an Entertainment Tonight about dumb comedians on podcast.

[Eldis]

Pretty funny. By the way, I just want to say, the record. I'm not like, God. I said. I'm like fat Jesus. Let me make that clear.

[Robert Oberst]

Y' all heard. Y' all heard?

[Eldis]

Fat God. I have some humility. Oh, dude, that's fun to be a.

[Robert Oberst]

Thumbnail of you tomorrow with lava all around it.

[Eldis]

Like, tell. Yeah, maybe I'm the fat Antichrist. That's true. That's a possibility.

[Robert Oberst]

New batch of hate for you.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah. There's nothing. You know, there's. That's. There's something very powerful in Lucifer.

[Stavros Halkias]

Triple. Triple xl. Lucifer.

[Eldis]

Man. That's. Dude, it's. It's. But, yeah, it is fascinating because I also just feel like just bouncing. There must have been guys who just like. Do you get that your whole life where people just, like, get. Are so insecure that they, like, try you to just be like, this guy? Who the fuck does he think he is? Just you existing and they. They take it as a personal, like, slight that you're big.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, for sure. Especially so I got picked on a lot until I got good at football. Like, until, like, junior year high school, I. I was like, like, man, I had some really rough bullies and actually, like, the guy who with me the most hung himself a couple.

[Eldis]

Nice dude.

[Robert Oberst]

Crazy. Yeah, crazy. But, like, he tortured me. He was a scary. And, like, he would torture me. And unfortunately, I. I became a junior and then I started acting like an.

[Eldis]

Of course. And then that's what happens. So you get people who get abused. It's like a. It's like a cycle.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. But luckily I caught that by, like, senior year. Like, I started getting attention from girls, and I started realizing, like. Like, because I had all my sisters and all stuff, I started realizing, like, me being silly and funny and nice is, like, that's. That's my. My best attribute.

[Eldis]

Right, right, right.

[Robert Oberst]

Being a jerk. Like, maybe the mean girls at school will laugh.

[Eldis]

Sure.

[Robert Oberst]

But, like, you're not Going to play. Yeah. It's not going to do anything.

[Eldis]

And even if you do that head's not going to to be good.

[Robert Oberst]

No.

[Eldis]

From the, from popular girls in high school that unless they were really popular. I guess, I guess I'm trying to think about the popular. You know what? I take that back. There were some girls that I'm you know, back in the day. I. Well I don't know because then all you know is what your friend, your friends who got to get said to you as. As non getters in high school. All I, all I have is these unreliable narrators. The guys who got the everyone lied.

[Robert Oberst]

To and there was always like that one girl who was known as a. Just cuz she kissed the guy or something.

[Eldis]

She like hooked up with one guy. It's like life's ruined. Yeah. Some girl gave a guy head in middle school.

[Stavros Halkias]

You just only hear stories. You think you're surrounded by the greatest sexual dynamos who ever walked the earth. You only hear their side of the story.

[Eldis]

I remember one kid said he seven girls in high school and I, I remember like it's like the jaws snap zoom where I'm like I haven't even grazed.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm down by seven.

[Eldis]

Yeah, I'm down seven zero. I fumbled the kickoff and he returned it for a touchdown. The opening kickoff is there's 1159 left in the first quarter and I'm down.

[Stavros Halkias]

Seven he one girl seven times. You just have to go toward his.

[Eldis]

Stats, you know, whatever. I wonder what he's up to. He's a good guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's not the most.

[Eldis]

I think he joined the armed services. The armed forces.

[Stavros Halkias]

Respect.

[Eldis]

Thank you for your service. Which means yeah got more fans. Good job eldest. Good job man. Oh folks, I've been away from my home for two months over two months on this on the dreamboat tour and I am happy to finally make this spring the season that I lock in with nutritious 2 minute meals from factor. Eating well has never been this easy. Just heat up and enjoy giving you more time to do what you want. I'm going to get in the zone big time. It's been a pretty good nutrition wise. It's been pretty good but it can be a lot better. You know what makes that easy factor. With 45 weekly menu options you can pick gourmet meals that fit your goals. Choose from Calorie Smart, Protein plus keto and more. Factor powers your day with satisfying breakfast on the go, lunches, premium dinners and hey guilt free snacks and desserts. You know I'M a little dessert guy. It's easy to savor more this spring. Factor Meals packs in the flavor with none of the fuss. Take that fuss not at Factor get started. Factor meals.com stavi50off and use code stavi50off to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. That's code [e-mail] stavi50off for 50% off. Could you imagine that? Plus free shipping. So let's not forget one last time. Stavi50off and what does that get you? 50% off your first box, idiot. Duh. It's clear what it gets you. Stopping 50 off. Factorymeals.com stabby50off yeah, were there any wild like bouncing bouncing situations?

[Robert Oberst]

For sure. So guys at first, when I started bouncing would try and check me. I think there's a look. Like a guy's got a look if he hasn't bounced for a while, maybe he's just too busy with his eyes or whatever. I don't know.

[Eldis]

But like at first, oh, it's like a projecting thing. It's just like a vibes thing. Not even size.

[Robert Oberst]

It's just, I think because it stopped like, like, I mean it probably happened for like a month or two. But I was at like that.

[Eldis]

That's still insane because you were like this S. Like, what size are we talking?

[Robert Oberst]

I was probably bigger than I am now. Yeah, a little bit bigger.

[Eldis]

That's nuts. That someone's like, yeah, that guy doesn't look confident bouncing. I'm gonna try and swing at him.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, I mean, like, I've had guys, I had an offensive duty cop have it happen. This one time we were, we. We would have shows. So like in the back we had. We had a rap group. I can't remember. It was like a Mexican rap group. I can't remember.

[Eldis]

Oh yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And then in the front we had a. A 15 and up dance party.

[Eldis]

Oh, God.

[Robert Oberst]

And one of the guys from the rap show got into the dance party.

[Eldis]

You can't be putting upand cominging Rappers near 15 and up Club Club nights.

[Robert Oberst]

And so it ended up being the most epic brawl I've ever been a part of.

[Eldis]

Oh, man.

[Robert Oberst]

Spilled out to the streets.

[Eldis]

Jesus.

[Robert Oberst]

A bunch of guys from Seaside drove out for the brawl. So like there was a fight going.

[Eldis]

On so long that word gets out of people. Commute to it.

[Robert Oberst]

From Santa Cruz to Seaside, that's a drive.

[Stavros Halkias]

Send word to the cavalry. Look to the east at dawn.

[Robert Oberst]

So if you know downtown Santa Cruz.

[Eldis]

Somebody'S trying to Stop us from underage children. Get the baseball bats in a van.

[Stavros Halkias]

Full of our strongest friends.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

So that downtown road, it's Main street and then there's Pacific. And literally the whole block, the entire street was packed full of people brawling. And one of our big rules was like, don't go out. Like, you're secure, you're safe here. You're. You're. You step past this, this door, we.

[Eldis]

Can'T do anything for you.

[Robert Oberst]

No insurance, no nothing. And cops, cops are on you when you're a bouncer. Like, we had to wear gloves after a while because they would check our knuckles.

[Eldis]

Wow.

[Robert Oberst]

So I'm standing there in the doorway and I'm sitting there thinking like this.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Cops are like, who do you think you are? We're the only ones who get to beat the out of whoever we want. That's our job. They were just jealous. Anyway, sorry.

[Robert Oberst]

So I'm standing in the doorway and I'm watching this and I'm like, wow, this is gonna be the craziest thing I've ever seen.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And the guy who got me into strongman, in the middle of it, I see him just come up like a movie out of people. And he goes, he's built like me. He's a big fucking dude. And I was like, oh, yeah, I.

[Eldis]

Gotta get in there.

[Robert Oberst]

We're in there. And like, I'm literally like, like one after the other after the other after, like, like people behind you, people all around you.

[Eldis]

Yeah. I mean, that's insane. A block long brawl is insane.

[Stavros Halkias]

All the members, all the members of IIICP had you surrounded.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, that one was the wildest. Like, but like, like Hank Williams Jr. We had a bunch of bike. I'm not going to say which biking group.

[Stavros Halkias]

All his rowdy friends, let's say.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Very physical altar altercation. A very, very physical altercation. And then the next night, I'm working the bar. There's no show, and I'm working by myself. So at the catalyst, when you go in, there's two doors and then like if, if the venue's open, you go underneath, and it used to be an old bowling alley, and that's where the shows are. If there's no show, you go up the stairs, there's a bar. So I'm sitting at the top of those stairs. Everything else is locked. And I'm sitting there by myself. The night after a pretty rough brawl.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And I hear 200 motorcycles. Oh, by my fucking. So my ass like fell out of the seat. I was like, like I knew. Like, I get goosebumps talking about it right now.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I knew in my head this was the end.

[Eldis]

Like, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And I was like, don't you go out like a fucking pussy. Like, don't. Like, this is the only thing you can control. Go out like a man. Open your fucking eyes and go out like a man.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would have been like, how wide are those vents? Is there a ladder?

[Eldis]

I would have tried to find a fat woman and put my clothes on her.

[Robert Oberst]

It was literally me, a bartender, and like one guy. So you hear 200 motorcycles pull up and I'm like, like, freaking out. I'm sitting at the top of the stairs and they start filing in. Just all these vests, all these sleeveless shirts, all these bald dudes. And then in the middle of them, ice, this little old dude just weasels his way between them and kind of pushes through. And he stands at the bottom of the stairs and he looks up at me and he goes like this.

[Eldis]

Wild.

[Robert Oberst]

I walk down the stairs, like, literally, like, terrified.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And he was like, were you here last night? And I was like, yes, sir. He goes, were you a part of what happened? I don't remember exact words. Were you a part of the situation that happened? I was like, yes, sir. And he goes, billy Tom calls these guys out, stand up here, and they all come up with like, their tail tucked between their legs and their heads down. He goes, you got something to say? They all, apologize to me.

[Eldis]

Wow.

[Robert Oberst]

Apologize to me. He pulls out a business card and he goes, anytime you have a problem, call me. Wow, bro. I'm telling you, like, what? I floated back up the stairs and I was like, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe, believe.

[Eldis]

And you're right. That was the right thing. Cuz if you did show cowardice, they probably would have you up.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're a standup guy.

[Eldis]

Literally.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's always like the little old guy in the gang who's like the one you need to be the most afraid of. It's like he commands all these soldiers.

[Robert Oberst]

I. I really, like, in that moment, I so thought. I was like, I'm. I'm. They're going to knife me.

[Eldis]

At least someone's going to knife.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's going to be a ceremonial ear cutting or something. Get out of here.

[Eldis]

So like, so this is like, you know, you start doing strong, man. But it's not like it doesn't seem to me like the thing that immediately starts paying big bucks, does it? Like, you still have to bounce probably, or. What are you doing at the time or, or can you train? Like, how, what, how, what are the, even the economics of something like that?

[Robert Oberst]

Most guys never make money, right? You know, most. And that's all they tell you when you start it. Everyone's like, you're never saying, you know, I knew I could use it as a platform. Like, I didn't, I never thought that I was gonna be the strong. Like maybe up until like my rookie year at Worlds, I, I thought maybe I could win. But then after that I realized I wasn't, I wasn't gonna be able to do what it took to win. But I could totally use this as a platform.

[Eldis]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

I could totally use this to do what I want to do because just like, I mean, eastbound and down, he said it so. Right. Like I wasn't trying to be the best at working out. I wanted to play.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, I felt that way.

[Eldis]

So you were just like, man, I mean, I'll lift, I'll lift this.

[Stavros Halkias]

But like that's the upside of like, if you don't, if, if like say you try strong and you don't make it, at least you're still strong as. Yeah, that is true. As long as you don't yourself up. Like if you try comedy and you flame out, then you're just not funny.

[Eldis]

Loser.

[Robert Oberst]

Dude.

[Eldis]

You hear that? Don't even do it, folks.

[Robert Oberst]

Not once you're going to fail.

[Eldis]

Yeah, that's, yeah, that is, that, that's interesting to have that perspective of just being like, ah, it. I guess I'll just do it. And then you were good as at it. Yeah. And then cuz, like, is it, is there more to it than the Cuz we were talking a little bit. It's like I didn't realize, you know, that you were going to like foreign countries and there's way more than just like. Because in my head it's just the espn, like did you travel a bunch of cool places? Was there money in that or was it again, just experiential or what was it?

[Robert Oberst]

There's a little bit of money.

[Eldis]

I like, was there some sultan? Like, did you have to fight his strongest?

[Stavros Halkias]

So I party.

[Eldis]

I got Uday Hussein's. He had a mongoloid that you had to wrestle Baby Ruth.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, no, I, I, I think the most money I ever made from a competition was like two grand.

[Eldis]

Wow.

[Robert Oberst]

I think about two, maybe 2800.

[Eldis]

What the. So just your. But to do insane things the human body objectively should not be doing.

[Robert Oberst]

So I think maybe when I got, I got top 10 at Worlds twice. I think that maybe one of those times I made three. Yeah, maybe. I might be off by like a grand now.

[Eldis]

What are the world's strongest man groupies? Like, they must be women that really, you know, it must be. They must run the gamut, you know what I mean? Like some sturdier gals, maybe. Those are there for sure, which is fine.

[Robert Oberst]

I think. I think that, I mean that, that goes along with anybody when you're this size, right? Like, you don't even have to lift weights. It's. It's always like a big guy.

[Eldis]

For.

[Robert Oberst]

Sure, you know, security and all that kind of stuff.

[Eldis]

But there's something kind of in, in, you know, in women's brains. And much of it's like, you know, height really does. You make people's lives easier. Like certain guys could never be five, seven, for example, eldest. I'm just saying certain guys wouldn't. Certain guys wouldn't be able to live, you know, to survive. But. So I get you. It was more like you were just always strong as hell. And there's a. There is, there's definitely a type of woman that's going to be attracted that whether you're a strong man or not.

[Robert Oberst]

There's, there's definitely strongman groupies for sure, that are specific to strongman.

[Eldis]

So fast. Yeah, it's like, it's like, well, it's not dangerous enough being a woman.

[Robert Oberst]

I remember getting a message from some girl a long time ago, like in Canada, and she was like saying she was scared of me, but it's like a roller coaster. Like she, she still wants to ride it. So like that, that's the kind of girl, like a, like a, a goth, right? Like had problems growing up. Type of a girl who goes to church, taxes.

[Stavros Halkias]

She wanted the literal werewolf from Twilight and was like, I'm just going to get as close as I can.

[Eldis]

Yeah, nothing wrong with a nice guy. That's. There's a little. Sounds like that Venn diagram is a little bit. With comedians.

[Robert Oberst]

Whenever you do.

[Eldis]

Goth is pretty good though. That's, that's, that's a nice one to have in the, in the groupie canon. I just, I just was wondering, like, does it attract a certain type of person? But that makes sense.

[Robert Oberst]

You can be surprised too. You never know. Like, there's just like a normal girl who had a big dad, you know?

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I don't think it's ever been just to like your attractive thing, though.

[Eldis]

I don't think it's got to be some psychology trick, right?

[Robert Oberst]

Like in high school it was, oh, this guy's gonna be a college football player.

[Eldis]

And then the girls like, oh, that's hilarious.

[Robert Oberst]

And then after that it was like, oh, he's gonna do this or that or whatever, you know, it was, it was always something else.

[Eldis]

Hey, come on, you're cute, man. Don't say that about yourself.

[Robert Oberst]

I mean, we. I don't think he liked it that much. Just moaning a bunch of.

[Eldis]

That's hilarious, dude.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I'll give you another. Another bouncing one. So I was.

[Eldis]

Please.

[Robert Oberst]

I was at that same spot at the top of the stairs in the Catalyst and at the bottom. One of the things I left out is there's a pizza counter.

[Eldis]

Sounds like a great spot.

[Robert Oberst]

It was awesome. I loved working there. I wish I never got fired for selling tickets.

[Eldis]

You were selling comps your own pocket?

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, yeah. I used to make of fun 5G's weekend all the time, man. You can't do that for long.

[Eldis]

But I was like, whoa, this golden goose keeps laying eggs.

[Robert Oberst]

It's a not sold out show. I'm out front selling tickets, you know. Yeah, it was silly. And. And one of my best friends who I played juco ball with was the head of security too. So like he caught me twice and was like, bro, come on, come on. And then they caught me one time really bad. Like 30 people walked in with fake tickets.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, man.

[Robert Oberst]

I was sitting up top. I was sitting up top of those stairs and that's awesome, dude.

[Eldis]

I respect that.

[Robert Oberst]

Trying to make money.

[Eldis]

Eldest is people are veng elders for Patreon links, right? Yeah.

[Unknown]

Cash app me. I'll get you in through the loading dock at the shows.

[Eldis]

I was like, yeah, they're delivering pizza. She's like, all right, you got the empty boxes. Like you'd make them bring a pizza and you'd eat it. It wouldn't give us any.

[Robert Oberst]

Some of that background stuff for shows is some of the craziest, funnest and most awkward stuff. Like you're talking about getting people through the, through the back ramp and stuff. So I remember I was. It was slightly stupid. I was doing security for. And they're fun, so much fun. Really cool guys. And a couple of them were single at the time. I don't know if they're single now. And I'm not going to say names, but they were like, like, we need some girls. So I walk over and there's these four girls together. And then I, I approached them and I was like, hey, you guys don't even want to meet the band? They're all super excited. And then the guy taps me on the shoulder. He goes, we just want three.

[Eldis]

Oh.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, no.

[Robert Oberst]

So I had to look at these girls.

[Stavros Halkias]

All right, who can carry this stone the farthest?

[Robert Oberst]

Yes. You know what sucked? You know what really sucked is I. I did it. I was like, okay, you three and the other girls. Why not me? And I was like, I'm sorry. She. Oh, so I'm. So I'm the ugliest. And I was like, no, I. I think you're very beautiful. He literally comes back and he goes, why don't you come, too?

[Eldis]

Wow. He makes you look like the ass. And then who knows? If. If you just invite them all, they're not all going to. Maybe you got the.

[Robert Oberst]

And the whole night, she kept saying, oh, you didn't even want me back here.

[Eldis]

Wow.

[Robert Oberst]

She kept saying that. I felt so bad. I felt bad. There's a lot of. Like that.

[Eldis]

So. Yeah, it's so weird. It's like, you know, what's one extra? That's not a problem.

[Robert Oberst]

It's a girl, too.

[Eldis]

You're a band. You might get sucked off by two of them.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's the lesson.

[Eldis]

That's the problem with stoners, man. That's the problem with stoners. If it was a cocaine band, he was like, maybe 800 women. I'm gonna.

[Robert Oberst]

Them all. He felt bad. So he came over and he got the drumstick from the show. And he goes, I filed it under D, so you know where to put it. It's a drumstick. And he gave me the drumstick because he felt bad about it.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

They were cool. They were. They were freaking awesome. Like, so much fun. And that whole venue. So, like, that. I was gonna say, I was up the top of those steps, and I was looking down, and we had a. A reggae band going. And in the front foyer by those. The pizza kitchen, there was these two just blasted drunk chicks that were, like, 50s, 60 years old. And one of her titties keeps plopping out, and she, like, drops her pizza on the floor a couple times and picks it up, and it's like. It's just a mess. And there's these big. I think they were Samoan. They could have been Tongan. I lived in Samoa for two years.

[Eldis]

Nice.

[Robert Oberst]

So I feel like I'm allowed to make that mistake. I know it's very upsetting to not know if it's Tonga or Samoan.

[Eldis]

Most of the people listening definitely know what the. You're talking about. That's for sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

We got A lot of Big OOST listeners.

[Robert Oberst]

So I lived in America Samoa for a few years. I love it there. But I'm pretty sure they were Samoan. And there was like four giant older dudes in their 40s, all wearing Hawaiian shirts, just looking really nice, like nice gentlemen, nice hair and everything. But they were thick and they start making fun of the girl or whatever. So I go down there and one of my buddies who was new fired off hot and said something. I don't remember what he said, but the. The oldest, the silver haired guy just opens his big meat hook, slaps him across the face and he goes down and he's snoring on the way to the ground. He's like, like on the way.

[Eldis]

That's awesome for them, an open hand slap. Dude, that's a meaty paw to do that to.

[Robert Oberst]

Somebody put him down asleep before he hit the ground.

[Stavros Halkias]

A slap to the shadow around didn't.

[Robert Oberst]

Even look like he's like a fighter. He's just a dude. Like he was. He didn't go there coming to fight. You know, when a guy comes to a bar wanting to fight, he didn't want this. It just presents. Presented itself.

[Eldis]

Yes. Yes.

[Robert Oberst]

And so like that we.

[Eldis]

That's even a. That's a so much more dangerous guy.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

That the guy that just in an instant can snap into that as opposed to like a guy who's like not.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thinking about it at all.

[Robert Oberst]

For sure. And those guys too, the guys that have that energy where they're looking for it, everybody feels it. Like you're on point with that. This guy. Yeah, he caught us off guard because he was smiling when he did it. Caught us off guard and we got. I think that was the only bouncing fight I feel like I lost. Yeah, it was like four on one until a couple more guys got there.

[Eldis]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

But like, like I went. I went home thinking like I.

[Stavros Halkias]

Four tongans. Four tongans. That's a rugby team, basically. Like, you can't. You can't beat yourself up over that one.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, I hung in there for a good couple swings.

[Eldis]

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[Unknown]

Yep.

[Eldis]

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[Robert Oberst]

My old man got. I don't know exactly how, but he got a job. There's. There's a trolley that goes on the. On the native side. It goes from the bottom of the mountain to the top, so not the side. Like, there's one side of the island that's, like, hotels and nice and everything. We lived in a hut with the village. And so, like, he just basically, for two years, kept that trolley running so people could go to the other side of the mountain to work. It was crazy. Like, I. I don't remember a ton of it. I was like, it was 4, 5, and 6 or something like that. And so, like, I remember, like, on Wednesday nights, the only time we ever had TV was Wednesday nights the army channel played wrestling.

[Eldis]

Hell, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And, like, I remember being so bored that we, like, would watch geckos crawl on the walls and stuff like that. But, like, you know, I don't remember.

[Eldis]

While your dad's working on the trolley, another very weird job.

[Robert Oberst]

Crazy, right?

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I got a dollar on light green. The trolley administrator head by a nose.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Well, dude, you've lived a wild ass Life we haven't even really got. You got to come back. Obviously we'll get more into it, but sounds like you have a lot of wisdom to give our listeners.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Eldis]

Sounds like you're a fucking a man who's as wise as he is strong.

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, my gosh, I hope not.

[Eldis]

Elvis. What do we got here, little buddy? Play us a couple calls.

[Unknown]

Hi, Bobby, Elvis and Justine. I have two questions for you. The first one is, is it weird to attend a comedy show by yourself? I'm pretty introverted and I've always had a smaller group of friends and I'm usually okay with going to things by myself, but I didn't really want to sit in a 2000 seat something theater by myself. So I was too nervous to go to your whereabouts tickets to the Dream tour. So, yeah, is it weird to go to accommodation by yourself? My second question is. I think this question's been asked before, but only by male listeners. I'm a woman in a larger metropolitan area in her late 20s, so a lot of my girlfriends have fiances or husbands or boyfriends or whatever. And I'm single, so I'm at the age where everyone wants to do everything with their husband or their boyfriend or fiance. How do you deal with getting into your late 20s, early 30s? And nobody wants to spend time with just their friends? Like none of these girls want to spend time with the girls. They always want to drag their fiance or their boyfriend or their husband along. And I don't always want to hang out with them.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

So how do I respectfully tell my friends that I don't want to hang out with your boyfriend and your fiance or your husband? Like, can we just have girls time? Or is this just part of getting older? So, yeah, let me know and hopefully I'll see you in your next tour. Bye.

[Eldis]

Damn. I mean, that is. That is tough.

[Robert Oberst]

Tail as old as time.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, for sure. Classic stuff. And yes, she's right, it is mostly guys. So it's refreshing to hear a woman be like, I don't want to hang.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, her first question is an easy answer.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Which is, no, it's not awkward to go to a comedy show by yourself.

[Eldis]

Yeah. For real. I love, I mean, I love going to movies by myself. I love popping into like shows. Like that's the nice thing about doing something about yourself is like you decide if you're not feeling it. You. Obviously some of these are like product, like a comedy show. If you come to one of our shows, you're gonna like it. You're gonna have a good time. And especially a comedy show is particularly easy because it's like once it starts, it's just a fucking comedy show all the way through. There's no like interacting. There's no doing anything even. In fact, it's like, you know, going with people. I mean, obviously it's fun because you can talk afterwards, but it's all. It's not the actual experience that's fun to do. It's not like going to fucking Benihana by yourself. You know what I mean? It's like, it's like, it's like, you know, it's, it's totally, it's totally fine. And I mean, I remember back in the day, every place when we did come down tours, every fucking comedy club was like, we've never sold more single tickets in our lives. Every place was like that.

[Robert Oberst]

That's a badge of honor though.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were bringing the community together.

[Robert Oberst]

And like, seems like, like it's, it's all the focus is off you too.

[Eldis]

Totally.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, like you can relax and you don't have to be worried about like your nervousness or anything. The lights go down focuses up on.

[Eldis]

Stage 100, I guess, particularly if you're a nervous person. Maybe you're worried about crowd work and getting.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And like, you know, if you go to a shitty comedian show, that can be an issue. But like, I, I think, I think I would have a lot. I actually did talk to a guy who I was positive was there by himself in the first San Francisco. The first show in San Francisco. And it was like it didn't come up. But even if it did, I wouldn't have been fucking mean about it. Whatever. But yeah, definitely go to the show. Don't let that. Don't let. I like having little experiences by myself. Whether that's like, you know, going to a fucking museum or just doing shit like that. It's nice. And again, being in control of it is pretty cool. Where there's not. You don't have to like, get everybody's fucking everybody to weigh in. The second question is a little bit of like, it is a little of like, yeah, you just gotta grow up a little bit, but your friends also it. The second one is a classic meet in the middle compromise situation where it's like, look, there's gonna be some vegetables, which is a group dinner.

[Robert Oberst]

Cabbage.

[Eldis]

Some cabbage. You have to eat to like, before you can have the like wings of just getting up and gossiping with the people you actually give a about. Right. Like, but this is part of growing up. I remember being like 20 in your early to mid-20s, and when somebody would have like, would like spring their girlfriend on you, you'd be like, are you kidding me, dude? You're a fucking piece of. You don't even care. Right? But it's like this doesn't even like Star Wars. Are you joking?

[Stavros Halkias]

Dude, beer pong is an even numbers game and you're throwing off the math.

[Eldis]

Oh yeah, you're gonna play with her. You're gonna play with her.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh yeah. Cuz she's such a good shooter.

[Robert Oberst]

Sucks.

[Eldis]

She sucks at beer pong, dude. I've been practicing all week.

[Stavros Halkias]

She keeps trying to bounce it. I'm gonna swat that every time.

[Eldis]

So yeah, you have to like. But I think it's maybe a little. I think all this is a little connected where it's like false barriers. Yeah, I think.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think there's a bit of a false psychological barrier to like getting your friends to hang out. Oh, they're not going to want to because they have their boyfriends or whatever. But like, if my girlfriend wants to go hang out with her friends, there's no explanation needed. Yeah, it's great.

[Eldis]

Yeah. And so like, look, might some of your friends be in weird relationships? That's a separate issue. Yeah, but for the most part it's like, you know, and we give the example. I hang out with elders all the time, obviously. Too much probably. But like, I'll hang out with Elsa, I'll hang out with his wife. And it's like, you know what I mean? Like, I'll hang out with you, I'll hang out with your girl. It's like. And it's also a thing of getting to know these people. I think, you know, there is something annoying about friends that just want to spring. They want to bring a significant other into the rotation immediately. It's like they got to earn their way in. Like, at this point, Ellis's wife is a good friend of like. It's like I would hang out with her alone, you know, but that took. I mean, they've been dating. You guys have been together for years, right? Like, that doesn't just happen overnight. And it's like the same thing with other people's. It's almost like you have to. It's like you date the per. You know what I mean? Like the person's friend where there's like levels of friend where you. That a significant other becomes.

[Stavros Halkias]

They don't need to be in the group chat just yet, but like, no, it's Levels.

[Eldis]

Exactly.

[Robert Oberst]

Real respectful bros. Podcast asterisk. Real quick. Yeah, you could have so just made a bad joke about your buddy's wife and you just slid right past it. Nobody else did. Yeah, it was like, well, we respect.

[Eldis]

Well, imagine being the woman that's married to eldest.

[Stavros Halkias]

This.

[Eldis]

Your life is already a nightmare.

[Unknown]

You lived with ST For a year and a half.

[Eldis]

We were roommate. Like, I was roommates with his wife. Yes. She's been through enough.

[Robert Oberst]

I want to say too about this specific with this, like, I think for. For her, she should feel like her. Her friends, if they are her friends. Your friends should put in the same effort to give you alone time that you should to learning to. To be friends with their new.

[Eldis]

Absolutely. And that's key. That's key is that it is like a give and take of like, you don't want to be like, every time they ask to hang out and if their boyfriend is coming, are you like, no. Because then it's like, if they invite you to like four group hangs and you say no every time, then they might even start to think like, does she just not even like, you know what I mean? Like, you have to. Exactly. It's a give and take. It's part of getting older. It's also hard because. And I've definitely been here when it's like when you're the fucking single one of the crew. And it's like it reinforces your insecurities of like. And that might be happening to her on some level where it's like, you're a little resentful, everybody's happy but you. Everybody want, oh, you're having such a good time with your fucking. But what about me? And it's like, I definitely went through that when I was younger. And then you mature and you realize, like, no, it's actually good when your friends are with someone they love. You're happy for them. And like, hey, if they're a little annoying, you don't got to see them every time. You can skip half the group hangs, but you should still see them sign. You still make an effort. And your friends should be able to be like, oh, let's just have girls nights.

[Stavros Halkias]

I had that in my 20s with my friends where I was like, oh, I thought it was going to be the four of us living in this apartment forever. It was like, you just get over it eventually.

[Eldis]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Robert Oberst]

All my friends with homes had that. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Oh, you want a lawn and property you own? Is that it? You want to start a family?

[Eldis]

That era.

[Stavros Halkias]

We just bought a Hookah, man, Come on. You're supposed to hang out.

[Robert Oberst]

We don't split this four ways.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm doing two hoses at once.

[Eldis]

Yeah, I guess we bought the four hose hookah for nothing. I could have gotten a single one.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're not respecting my life plan.

[Eldis]

I got enough peach shisha to last us six months, you piece of. Yeah, sorry.

[Stavros Halkias]

File this one under it's all part of growing up. I mean, it's not as easy not to dismiss the question or anything, but it's like, yeah, you're just going to adjust to a new social dynamic of like, people, other people being around. But like, at those gatherings and get togethers and the dudes are gonna break off and they're gonna have their chat. The girls are gonna break.

[Eldis]

Here's the other thing. The ones you don't want to hang out with, they don't want to hang out with you. You both have to do a respectful dance for your friend's sake.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Eldis]

And then eventually you might have form some kind of grudging respect that true friendship does come out of. That's how this works.

[Robert Oberst]

That's a great point.

[Eldis]

That's a great point. So, yeah, good luck. Good luck. We're rooting for you.

[Stavros Halkias]

And come to a comedy show.

[Eldis]

And come to a comedy show. If we happen to come by, you know, tell us. We'll. We'll put. We'll even put you on the list. Oh. What the hell's going on? Is it time to keep it twisted? Yes, it is. Wow. Keep it twisted with a high school twisted feed. I got half a mind to crack this right now. Psych. That makes sense. You hard, wouldn't it, you little goblins? Well, that's not what it's time for because we still have a show. We are in the green room here, and I will be cracking this twisted tea post show. But right now. Yeah, somebody didn't plan things out well. And we're doing ads before the last weekend of the tour.

[Unknown]

Jp not again. Not again.

[Stavros Halkias]

I do push, pull all the strings here at Stavi's World. And this was one of my many faux pas.

[Unknown]

You gotta get your act together, man.

[Eldis]

Get your act together. I am.

[Stavros Halkias]

I am stepping down as the head of the Stavi's World podcast.

[Eldis]

A lot of people don't know that JP is the president of CFO Puppet Master. Yeah, he's pulling all the strings.

[Stavros Halkias]

The twisted Chief.

[Eldis]

Stavi's World. Stavi Baby Enterprise is a subsidiary of McDade Corp. Stop.

[Stavros Halkias]

Name me CEO. So, like, when all the financial Crimes are uncovered. I'm the one who takes the hit and goes to jail.

[Eldis]

I'm getting all my. I'm getting paid in. In stocks that are being run through three separate shell companies.

[Stavros Halkias]

Everything's in your mom's name.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah. Untouchable.

[Stavros Halkias]

You got a little office in Delaware so you don't have to pay taxes.

[Eldis]

But that's not why we're here, folks. We're here to discuss ice cold, delicious twisted tea. Twisted. A beautiful beverage that gets my twisted prick hard. Any. Anyway, Cani Cantalini?

[Unknown]

How do we not make that drop yet?

[Eldis]

Now tell me, Eldis, do we have a question to soothe the minds of the twisted listeners?

[Unknown]

We have a woman who's in quite the twisted pickle. Let's see what she got.

[Stavros Halkias]

Normal questions.

[Eldis]

Oh, that's how you are.

[Unknown]

Jesus Christ.

[Eldis]

McDate is a madman. I've said it before, I will say it again. And right now you're probably all enjoying the McDade's Maniac series.

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course you are. You found out about stavi's world through McD's Maniacs.

[Eldis]

We're the only podcast with eight separate sub podcasts concurrently running through its patreon.

[Unknown]

This is like the laziest way to start a podcast network.

[Eldis]

We just are funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Slightly different is its own show.

[Eldis]

Same everything. It just got a different title. And sometimes we smoke weed. Anyway, I can't wait till Twisted. He's paying for its own sub Patreon podcast. We're lit. Hey, ears are open. Twisted. Glug, glug, glug. Oh, I'm drinking the offer.

[Stavros Halkias]

Stavi's Twister Chasers.

[Eldis]

That's right.

[Stavros Halkias]

One of those souped up trucks driving through tornado alley looking for twisters. Drunk driving.

[Eldis]

Looking for bitches. Drunk driving. And then we them. No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bus meets storm chasers.

[Eldis]

Bang. Bus meets storm. Now, okay, I'm back in the Twisted. The Twisted Bus.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a money faucet.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. So anyway, line up that question, but for the meantime, we'll just be answering questions. We won't be getting our dick sucked in a yellow and blue conversion van while. I don't know, I guess our hurricanes we haven't figured out exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tornadoes.

[Eldis]

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Tornadoes. Go ahead.

[Unknown]

Hey, scoffy Eldish. And like highly esteemed guests, I'm sure I'm a fan of. Sorry to bug you guys, but this is going to be a settle the debate question, please. And if I'm so lucky, question of the week. I'd love to Keep it twisted with y' all.

[Eldis]

Keeping it twisted.

[Unknown]

My argument with my boyfriend right now.

[Eldis]

Pause this.

[Unknown]

So he works full time, and then our agreement is I.

[Eldis]

Doesn't matter. Yeah, go ahead.

[Unknown]

So he works full time, and then our agreement is I stay at home, take care of our pets, do my wifely duties, make sure laundry is done. Like our laundry is done. Like food is, you know, there. Do my wifely duties. You know, I'm a good girlfriend. And then I also, like, come in with my own income, so he doesn't. I still pay, like, my half of rent. It's just. And then I like, buy and resell things. I buy and resell vinyl music. Those are really big right now. Buy and resell clothes. But lately he has been kind of fed up with having things in our house. Like, I have a dedicated closet to everything I have listed for sale, and he has been donating my things to Goodwill. Is that shitty boyfriend behavior? Because he's a good man. He's not English in his first language, so, like, I don't know what his thing is.

No, it's not his first language.

[Stavros Halkias]

An Englishman would never.

[Eldis]

Oh, wow, you respect the British now?

[Stavros Halkias]

No, but just.

[Eldis]

Interesting. Keep going, Elvis. There's a couple red flags here, a couple twisted ass little things going on.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's a couple of math things that are not adding up, but we want to get what we're gonna.

[Eldis]

We're gonna open up the twisted mat, the equation, the twisted calculator. We're gonna get the twisted abacus out.

[Stavros Halkias]

At the pediatrician's office with the beats.

[Eldis]

Yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna do some math with the twisted abacus.

[Unknown]

I don't know what his thing is, and he doesn't hate me. He's a good man. He's a good boyfriend. He doesn't hit me, but it feels like he donates my things to Goodwill.

I thought she said hit originally, but I don't know if she said hate.

Just now, but it feels like he hits me. He donates my things to Goodwill, if that makes sense. And we got in an argument about it.

[Eldis]

Let's say she says she must be saying hate. She's not saying it feels like he hits her because. Donates her stuff.

[Unknown]

I think that's. That's right.

[Eldis]

Good. I'm glad we really. I'm glad you did a thorough job vetting the question Eldis. Anyway.

[Unknown]

And then a few months later, which was like about a month ago, before we flew to Japan, he donated a bunch of my stuff again that I had Listed for sale. And he. We're about to start a business together right now. Like where I go live on this app and sell things for us.

[Eldis]

This bitch doing qvc.

[Unknown]

Why would I. I don't know. I told him. I was like, if you donated my.

Thing, she's on check.

Why would I want to invest more money into buying things with you if you've donated them already and if you don't regret it and you stand by donating my things? Does that make sense?

[Eldis]

Yes.

[Unknown]

I don't know. He's not a shitty boyfriend. Love y' all. I put him onto the pod. Actually, I took him. We went and saw you savvy front row in la. I took us out because I'm a good ass girlfriend.

[Eldis]

Okay.

[Unknown]

I don't know, guys. We're trying and it's a big debate and it's not like breakup worthy, but it's beef worthy and I need it. Thank you so much. Love y' all.

[Eldis]

She's pissed. She's a super fan. She's dating somebody.

[Stavros Halkias]

Here's my D code on the situation.

[Eldis]

Please, let's hear. I have some thoughts.

[Stavros Halkias]

Flying to Japan. English, not his first language. He's Japanese. If the item doesn't spark joy, it's gone. You throw it out. Don't care if it's in your special closet. Marie Kondo.

[Eldis]

Marie Kondo.

[Unknown]

Damn.

[Stavros Halkias]

Got birds at the condo. You gotta throw that out. Cultural thing. You gotta kneel at the dinner table and you gotta throw out your extra.

[Eldis]

See, I read it differently. I read it as Latino Weeb, Interesting Latino who loves to anime.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Eldis]

You got the. You got a little bit of the, let's say old world with not respecting your girlfriend. So you know what I mean?

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, well, he's clearing out the stuff from the closet because he's trying to make it a shrine to Goku. He's putting his anime stuff, he's got swords and shit that he's trying to put in the closet. Okay, that could add up too. The one question that I have.

[Eldis]

No, we won't listen for this twisted question. We will do no more race speculation. We are going to. We are going to only keep it so twisted.

[Stavros Halkias]

Even though he's clearly from Central Asia, he has a flat back of the head because of how he was laid in the crib. And he lacks empathy.

[Unknown]

We're like, if he's Latino, I'm suspicious. But if he's Japanese, I have a.

[Robert Oberst]

Cultural reference for him.

[Eldis]

He is doing the honorable thing for his family.

[Stavros Halkias]

You gotta commit seppuku if you're running afoul.

[Eldis]

Yeah, maybe your shit wasn't selling on Depop and he was. It was either donated or fucking slice his belly open for his ancestors.

[Stavros Halkias]

But now here's the thing. Is that so she said she contributes her income.

[Eldis]

Now this is the. Out of everything that's been said here. The most insane thing was something that she glossed over was that at first she's describing the way that they go about things and it's like, he works full time, she does housework, which I think is fine. I think that's how shit should. Like, that's totally okay if one person wants to do that shit. Stay at home boyfriend, stay at home girlfriend, who cares 100%. That's. The world is working in a way now where there's inequality is so great that if you have one person in your family who has a good job, everyone else should just tend to them. You hear them? My family, uncles and siblings. Everyone in my family. Just something to think about anyway.

[Stavros Halkias]

But every family has Of a lot. Landlord.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Essentially I literally. It is the feudal model. Except I don't get any turnips out of this. I just get a back talk at least for their houses. And all I got is sass.

[Stavros Halkias]

You should at least get a coat of arms.

[Eldis]

Yeah, I deserve a coat of arms anyway. But the craziest part that I think you're also getting at is that, okay, great, you split duties, he works full time, whatever, you pay half the rent.

[Stavros Halkias]

Where's this income coming from?

[Eldis]

You pay half the fucking rent and you cook and clean and do all this shit. So that's number one. Is the. Is like that seems kind of at odds. Unless he also. Unless he chips. Let's say she pays her half of the. But that's. Does he still do half of the chores? Like, to me, this is a little.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bit of a Paying for all the groceries, right?

[Eldis]

Maybe you're right. Maybe utilities, whatever.

[Stavros Halkias]

Car bill.

[Eldis]

Car bill, whatever.

[Unknown]

Half is a lot. But I hear some clues, like, she's flipping. They live in la. Is her. You know, even if it's a lot of income, is it coming from like ebay or something?

[Stavros Halkias]

Is she like, yes, he's paying for that white Infinity with the tinted windows.

[Eldis]

We're coming up against the twisted race speculation ceiling.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm honoring cultures. I'm honoring cultures ceiling.

[Eldis]

How much racial speculation can you do and still get the great amount amount of money?

[Unknown]

He could be Iris.

[Eldis]

Jp we need a little. We need a little animation. Our hands are bumping up against the twisted Racial ceiling, invisible fence collar.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know.

[Eldis]

So, yes, elders, you're right. That. But, dude, if she pays for half, even if her job is, like, irregular, she's showing holes. Well, she might be, which is fine.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's showing holes.

[Eldis]

That's also fine. She could be showing hole. That, to me, is actually more honorable than flipping leather jackets. Showing tits in hole is way harder. Well, actually, if it's harder, but you have to show a lot more.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jacket arbitrage is pretty despicable.

[Eldis]

Yeah, like, people who go to thrift stores, like, ooh, this is worth $80. I don't want it, but I'm gonna sell it. Like, I find it weird. It's like a thrift store should just be a beautiful thing where sometimes you get. Sometimes you get the. The greatest shirt you'll ever wear. And sometimes you get fleas.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Eldis]

Like, you never know what you're gonna get. I do think it's been ruined a little bit by seeing people scanning and buying and flipping it. It's like you. I hate when things are overly curated. There's something to the mess of stumbling on a BE. Like, when we hit that. When we hit those DVDs. And fuck it. When I got the incredible hall in.

[Stavros Halkias]

Birmingham, the Birmingham load, they call it to this day, I brought, like, a.

[Eldis]

Gladiator Blu Ray for a dollar. I could win. I don't want to flip it.

[Unknown]

Could you flip it? What is that really worth? Not to hate on Gladiator, but.

[Eldis]

Are you kidding me? A Braveheart Blu Ray?

[Unknown]

Oh, Braveheart.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's reverse drug dealing. You take the $1 single DVDs, you package them together in a beautiful collection, and you sell that for a markup to cover your shipping costs.

[Eldis]

Yeah, I mean, look, whatever. I could have flipped a you, elder. That's. That's neither here nor there. The point is, we respect women who show their tits more than women who sell jackets from thrift stores. And that actually is true, by the way. That sounds like we're joking. And we were, you know. Oh, you know, whatever. Well, workers work. Whatever. Even flipping jackets, I guess, if you work hard enough. Anyway, so I'm a little worried. I'm a little curious about the General Dynamics because this. What's happening here is this person, our friend who called in has a grievance and feels like she's allowed to complain in an area where her boyfriend maybe hasn't even bothered to gaslight her yet.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, it is. She said it was a settle the debate question. Okay, so it implies that she's discussed.

[Eldis]

This before, but what I'm saying is it feels like she might have lost it. Other debates that she's actually mad about and letting it bubble out because if I was doing all the chores and paying half the rent, I'd be pissed. And maybe I lost that negotiation and I'm taking it out on some other shit. But that's my general question. From what we know is you seem happy. Whatever. Is this setup fine? She says they're starting a business or whatever. That's a little weird. Like, are you in a good relationship? Let's ask that question. Are you being taken advantage of a little bit? Is that possible now? Maybe I'm being taken advantage of. Maybe there's just someone who. Maybe you're scattered, maybe you're messy. Maybe this person's just like, I want this fucking closet. I asked you to either sell this or donate, and you didn't do it. So I just took matters into my own hands. Some people can jive with that. That would drive me fucking crazy. If we had a. If I was debating, if I had a. An argument with a significant other and they just got rid of something that we didn't have, like a hard and fast agreed upon date where it had to go and they knew I wanted it, I would be like, are you fucking kidding? What the fuck are you doing? You know what I mean? Let alone if I was to sell it. I'm talking about just if I was hoarding, I would be pissed. But if I was like, hey, I plan on selling this, that would piss me off.

[Stavros Halkias]

That would be deeply annoying. But also in that situation, I feel like if I had moved myself stuff into this outbox of things that is going to be sold and I had maybe dragged my feet and then all of a sudden I wake up the next day and it's donated, I would feel like I up a little bit too. It might temper that initial response of being pissed off.

[Eldis]

But, but, and I agree with you, I would have thought, here's what I would say. And this is clearly why we can never date jp, you know, because I do.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're literally the wait until the cameras are off.

[Eldis]

Do this. And I would be the person be like, excuse me, sweetheart, where's my. Where are my four XL tracksuits?

[Stavros Halkias]

I would believe in your weight loss journey, you don't need them anymore.

[Eldis]

I would feel like I fucked up too. But that would be internal.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Eldis]

You know, I mean, I feel like I should have sold those, but also, who the fuck are you? Yeah, to sell my shit to take.

[Stavros Halkias]

My shit out of my pocket.

[Eldis]

And also, yeah, if that's your job and if that's how she pays half time the the. And she's paying half the. Now again, let's go back to the top. If she didn't have to pay and he donated her stuff, cost to do him business being a stay charged to the game. You know what I mean? Like, but if that's your livelihood of what you're chipping in, plus you're doing.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is a big X factor.

[Eldis]

That would piss me off if that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Closet of stuff was in fact part of her.

[Eldis]

Also say this. How much livelihood are we really talking about? And who paid for those flights to Japan? Because I've flown to Japan. It ain't cheap, baby. So maybe we're just thinking about. But you know, what's your quality of life like? Is he taking? Is he buying all this other cool shit? Are you going out all the time? Whatever. At the end of the day, if this is not that substantial an amount of money, theoretically, and it's mostly junk, you might have made 80 bucks or whatever the fuck. But this guy's bringing. He's fucking paying for everything. It's annoying and you should have a conversation about it. And that's the other thing I'm unclear of. How much discussion have they had? Because she's saying, settle a debate, but it doesn't even feel like she's had the initial conversation with him from what I'm hearing. Maybe I'm missing stuff. Did I miss something, Eldis?

[Unknown]

No.

[Eldis]

Okay, so it feels like it's just something that's festering. She seems to have brought it up, right? Or did she not bring it up at all?

[Stavros Halkias]

I had brought it up.

[Unknown]

I think so. But she doesn't really go into many specifics here.

[Eldis]

So, look, I say you can talk about it and you can also. It's okay for you to draw a boundary, by the way, and be like, hey, this is my fucking lively. And again, be realistic. Do you make actual money off this? But even if you don't, right, this is just your relationship, your partner. You should feel like they respect you. And if you're feeling disrespected by the fact that they just threw away your shit. Or donate. I mean, he says he donated. Go check the fucking dumpster behind your apartment complex. I gotta hunt. You might find those fringe jean jackets there. But anyway, it's just disrespect. I'm speaking as someone who has hoarding in his family and who I think I have the Tendency to collect shit. And I could see a significant other hating the fact that I just have this box that I don't get rid of. If they were to have a conversation with me and talk to me about it and they're like, I'm just gonna. If you don't do something in a week or whatever, I'm gonna donate this. That's different than if I wake up one day and it's just gone. That. And maybe that's control. Those are my own psychological things. Whatever. But at the end of the day, your partner cannot do shit that drives you fucking crazy. And you at least have to understand maybe he had the exact opposite issues, right? Where it's like he grew up in a really messy family and it drove him crazy, so he keeps it too neat. Either way, you gotta come to a consensus. It can't just feel like there's steamrolling your thoughts and dreams. For their.

[Unknown]

I think they can come to common ground if they sit down together and enjoy a twisted tea with each other. Perhaps she could have, you know, the original, which is delicious.

[Stavros Halkias]

Peach sacrament, mix them together in a little cup.

[Eldis]

That's a great way to look at it. Eldis, have you thought about cracking an ice cold twisted tea? And maybe. Here's the. Here's the. Here's the cup. Compromise. You keep your money, but you buy twisted tea for the whole family. Oh, that's a great. You know, you're allowed your little shop. And maybe. And maybe, you know, he has a couple twisted teas that are brewed with real iced tea and are 5% alcohol by volume.

[Unknown]

That sounds delicious.

[Eldis]

And it's delicious. It's the perfect drink. Whether you're outside at a barbecue or inside, you know, enjoying a film together.

[Stavros Halkias]

Whatever it is the beverage that eases marital disputes, the alcoholic beverage.

[Eldis]

When you're having a heated argument with a loved one, drink it over. Great point, Eldon. So anyway, keep all that in mind. Yeah, Give yourself the applause, man. I know you want to.

[Unknown]

I was gonna.

[Eldis]

Oh, you're going to keep it twisted. Keep it twisted. How did you get just the last part of that fucking word?

[Unknown]

I thought, I thought I changed that setting on the fucking. Okay, but.

[Eldis]

But yeah, ultimately, where do we land on. This is.

[Stavros Halkias]

My thing was you reminded me that my very similar thing with this when I moved in with my girlfriend was I had all these like bins of my stuff, random, miscellaneous, and it was taking up a lot of room in our apartment. That was. Room was at a premium. And she asked me, like, can you go through these bins.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And get rid of them. And I kind of dragged my feet doing. And she very patiently said, can you do this again? And I ultimately did it. But if she. One of one day, all my stuff from those bins had been gone, I would have been pissed.

[Eldis]

You would have been pissed, but it also. You would have had. If she did it multiple times.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

She talked to you about it. And that's different than what it seems like this motherfucker just threw the shit away, Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

It's dependent on how much you talked about it and what you said about it.

[Eldis]

And look, maybe we're getting your side of the story and this motherfucker's asked you every day for fucking two years to do it. Right? But if this is just kind of quick. Whatever she said it was the closet. It's the fucking. It's my office.

[Robert Oberst]

I'm on zoom calls, looking like an.

[Stavros Halkias]

Asshole with fucking headless Barbie dolls behind me. No.

[Eldis]

So, yeah, like, at the end of the day, it comes down to what we always say is, let's have a fucking conversation about this. This clearly bothers our friend here, and you have to figure out why that bothers you so much. What is it? Is it the fact that he feels like he's not listening? Is it the fact that he doesn't think the way you earn your money, he sees it as a little hobby, he doesn't respect it. Is it the fact that you just don't like feeling controlled? Maybe the fact that he's paying for everything and he feels like he can just throw your shit away makes it feel a little too much like you're in the fucking 40s or whatever, right? Like you can't even sign up for a credit card or whatever, right? I don't know what it is. You have to search your feelings, but whatever it is, understand that. Bring that context into this discussion and then have that talk where it's like, hey, I really don't appreciate you doing this, and if you're gonna do this, and maybe I can be too messy, whatever, we have to institute some kind of, like, conversation, then a one week buffer rule, and then you're allowed to do it and I won't get mad. You know what I mean? Whatever it is. But this, like most of our questions, the answers are 1 or 2. Have a conversation where you really speak your feelings and feel heard and respected and maybe grow closer. Or crack open a pair of ice cold twisted tees. And don't forget to keep it twisted. Twisted. Hey, Stavy, baby. I need some advice. This is pretty serious stuff. I had recently overcame a dry spell of like, two years. I'm dating this girl. I really like her. We like lots of the same stuff. She's funny, really get along, really healthy relationship. But I got her into rock climbing a couple months ago, and it's been a really fun thing that we can do together. But now she's too jacked. Like, you know, I'm looking at her arms, like, these are. These are some dude biceps. Like, doggy style. Like, I'm looking at a dude's back, bro. And like, it makes her ass fat. But I'm like, I'm not sure what the deal is.

[Robert Oberst]

Like, yeah, but, like, what's her number?

[Eldis]

Yeah, what's she up to? For real Instagram. I got. Yeah, I literally. I'll let her. She takes a little chalk bag and rubs her hands before she jacks me off. You called the wrong show, dude. I'm trying to carabine into that.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're not gonna sit here and be like, yeah, Jack's people are disgusting.

[Robert Oberst]

I thought he was gonna say something along the lines of her grip is too much now.

[Eldis]

Right? Which, you know, maybe some calluses, maybe that doesn't. And there's a communication when that's going in your ass.

[Robert Oberst]

But worrying that she's. She's got, like, definition in her back and biceps. You said her butt is getting bigger? Like, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Come on. The positive.

[Robert Oberst]

Unless she's like, all trend out, like, got up.

[Eldis]

What she doing? Unless she's on gear. Come on, dude. How big?

[Stavros Halkias]

98 miles an hour the other day.

[Eldis]

Climbing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Some of those girls are in really good shape. But, like, it's not. It's not like they're going to go step on the Mr. Olympia stage.

[Eldis]

Totally.

[Robert Oberst]

Ms. Olympia.

[Eldis]

And is that a Mrs. Olympia, by the way. Ms. By the way. Elders, could you have gotten a smaller speaker? I'll just buy a bigger one. You piece of shit. That's the biggest.

[Unknown]

Oh, hold on. No, sorry, go ahead. I think I figured out how to turn the volume up on that.

[Eldis]

No problem, man. It's not a critical portion of the show.

[Unknown]

It's set up different from the one at home.

[Eldis]

Home, man.

[Unknown]

But I think we did get it.

[Eldis]

Anyway, whatever. Is that the end of it?

[Robert Oberst]

Are we allowed to just say we hate the person call?

[Eldis]

So far we ain't me, bro. We're going to let him finish. He's not going to say anything that's going to exonerate him, but let's at least let him Finish. She's too jacked. She's getting jacker than me. That's it right there. That's it right there.

[Robert Oberst]

Voice the whole time.

[Eldis]

That's it right there. That's what I was gonna say. And he just said it himself. Come on, dude. I'm looking at the speaker like it's him. You guys, stop what you're doing, you small anchor speaker. Bluetooth speaker. Yeah, I mean, that's really what it comes down to. You know, we're on the record here. I like. I think it's cool when a girl is jacked that when she's strong. Obviously, I'm interested in all types of women, from the jacked to the pleasantly plump.

[Robert Oberst]

I'm gonna hook. I haven't told him yet, but I got. I'm gonna hook Stavi up.

[Eldis]

Oh, dude, that's actually so sick. Please don't. Please don't joke about stuff like this. This has been a great day. I just can't get. I can't get my hopes up. Like my dad saying, dude, I'm actually going to be at your fucking football game. I don't. Don't do this. Don't pretend there's jacked girls waiting if there aren't. So anyway, that's. He said everything he needed to say. She's getting jacked or the merry. You're being a bitch, dude. You're being a smoke. You're doing. You're engaging in top level little dickory right now.

[Robert Oberst]

You don't have to take this as, like, you suck forever, but take it as three guys telling you to suck it up. But like, yeah, you got to check yourself, homie. Like, you do. You need to check yourself.

[Eldis]

Are you actually. Because it doesn't even sound like. It literally sounds like sour grapes because.

[Robert Oberst]

He'S upset bigger than me now.

[Eldis]

And so it's the cla. It's kind of. It's literally sad, actually. Like, I feel bad for this woman where it's like this guy that you're in a relationship with who ostensibly has some feelings of love towards, even if it's not, you know, they haven't said I love you.

[Robert Oberst]

Probably didn't even want to rock climb. Yeah, she's probably doing it because him.

[Eldis]

And she's like, hey, he was right. I love this. And maybe we're gonna be together forever. And he's like, stop getting strong. Stop being. And then it's like, because she's better at something than him. He's like, and you know what? She's ugly now. I mean, that's the most classic misogynist thing to do is be like, well, now she's not. It's definitely not that I feel emasculated. It's that she's gross. It's like, she can't. You don't get ugly because you do. Like, three months of rock clock. You don't get jacked enough. Like, look, am I. Am I here to say that, like, looks. Everybody likes different stuff. Is there a moment where somebody you're with transforms their body to such an extent that you don't find them attractive anymore? Sure, that can happen. A little bit of rock climbing doesn't seem like it would. You're on that threshold. This is so much more, to me psychological about this guy. You gotta grow up. You gotta look deep in your heart and see are you actually not attracted or are you just trying to. You know, you're creating this narrative about how she's bad now because you feel like a little.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not like she's walking around the house ripping apples in half and like, yes, yes.

[Robert Oberst]

Like, she's working out. And you're the one who encouraged it as well.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're spending time together doing a thing that you enjoy. Just, like, appreciate that.

[Robert Oberst]

That becomes a super consistent thing with relationships. Whether it's money or, like, health or whatever. People get really weird about their partners doing better than them or whatever. Like, it's just, I think that in itself, like, no matter what, you should always want, maybe I don't want you to beat me everything, but if it's my partner.

[Eldis]

That's the idea, that's the whole point, is that you find somebody that you're just, just always, you know, happy for and especially not like. To see yourself in competition with a partner is so up, you know, like, that's so crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

So maybe there's space for, like, a little bit of competitive shit talking when you're, like, together doing the thing. Because, like, I play this card game with my girlfriend. She absolutely whoops my ass at it all the time. And I'm like, you're cheating the whole time. But, like, after, like, we played a.

[Eldis]

Fun game, threaten to drink unless she lets you win. I'm going to start again.

[Robert Oberst]

You thirsty?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm on the roof with a bottle of Jim Beam. Like, stop cheating.

[Robert Oberst]

Wild.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just enjoy it, man.

[Eldis]

Man, yeah, man.

[Robert Oberst]

I feel bad. I feel bad. Like, we kind of ripped on this guy. But you kind of need it, though. Don't take it as like, this is the totality of who you are, but take it as like A moment to check.

[Eldis]

Yeah. We're rooting for you to figure this out and actually think about this deeply. What's actually troubling you. And if you break up with her, tell her I said, what's up?

[Robert Oberst]

What up?

[Eldis]

What's up, little mama?

[Unknown]

Hey, I have. I guess I'm looking for some advice.

[Eldis]

I got.

[Unknown]

I was in a relationship for four years with someone that I thought was going to last lifetime, and he. I guess his feelings have changed and.

[Eldis]

He is with someone else within the two weeks that we broke up. And I'm having a very hard time.

[Unknown]

Adjusting because we're also still living together.

Wants to go out and stay out.

Over there, which is fine.

[Eldis]

No, it's not. But any advice for, like, what the.

[Unknown]

Do I do to deal with this? I would greatly appreciate you.

[Eldis]

Oh, my God. If you could address that and give me some pointers, because it's actually a.

[Unknown]

It's rough. It's really rough right now.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Thank you so much and I love you.

[Eldis]

Good God almighty. I mean, by the time this comes out, hopefully you've healed.

[Robert Oberst]

What's on Going Christmas. Merry Christmas.

[Unknown]

Hopefully she has a new roommate by then.

[Eldis]

I mean, look, you are just in the. Like, this is. This is somebody who the. She's in the mid. A hurricane has hit her house. She's twirling around it in a golf cart while she sees a cow go past her. And she's like, how do I deal with the tornado damage? It's like, you're still in the middle of the fucking tornado. This is like, there's. I feel so bad for you. Number one is like, you can't be there. And I know finances are difficult. I totally get that. Like, you need to crash with some friends. Like, at this point, like, a really good friend will understand that. Like, you can't be in that place. Get out of there as soon as fucking possible. Break the lease if you have to. If you can figure it out. If you can't, you just have to spend as little time as possible. From we. Look, all we have is we don't know what's going on, but from what you've said, it's like, this is incredibly weird and shitty behavior. You can't have this person in your life. You have to go. No contact fully. This person's completely fucked you over. And to still live with them is. Is just impossible for you.

[Robert Oberst]

Did she say he cheated on him or he just started dating someone within six months, six weeks of breaking up? Part of it.

[Eldis]

Two weeks, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Two weeks. Yeah. Which Kind of implies.

[Robert Oberst]

Yes. If you've been together four years and.

[Eldis]

And he's. He's dating someone and you live in the same. Like, does that come over? That's crazy. That's so inconsiderate on his part. Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did she say that. That the guy was going, like, to her place or something?

[Unknown]

Yeah, he's like. He's there a lot, so it doesn't sound like this girl's coming over, but.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Eldis]

Either way, you got to get it. This cannot be the situation. Situation.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And in terms of how to deal with it, this is just. I. I really hate to. There's no. You're just so. For a little bit, like, emotionally, it's just gonna be so hard.

[Stavros Halkias]

The thing that's craziest about it is, like, long term, that kind of has to work towards forgiveness for your sake. Like, if you're gonna, like, move on and, like, have a better life and, like, imagine a better life, you're gonna have to get to that point. But right now, that's so far away. It's like. Sounds insane.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

First of all, you kind of have.

[Eldis]

JP in his Catholic.

[Stavros Halkias]

The Pope teaches us.

[Robert Oberst]

I think I'm the only one on this couch who's got a divorce under the belt. And I will say hopefully, hopefully you come back around. Like, in my case, we had a kid.

[Eldis]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

So I got super lucky that we came back around.

[Eldis]

You had something to bargain to hold over your kid.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Because that's how the dads have all the power. Right, Right, right, right.

[Robert Oberst]

I. I mean, yeah. Like, you're saying. We talked about this earlier really briefly about having your life kind of run away with momentum.

[Eldis]

Yes.

[Robert Oberst]

And she's. You're in the thick of momentum right now. Like, you're saying the tornado currents.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Whatever metaphor you want to use. Waves, currents, fire. Like, you're in the middle of a natural. An emotional, natural disaster has happened to you. And, like, you're gonna be living in some FEMA camps for a little bit. Like, it's gonna be brutal for a little bit, and that's knowing that and letting that also, by the way, you have to be okay with that because that. That, you know, I've done that over breakups where I pretend I'm fine, where I'm like, oh, whatever. And I go out, try and, you know, go on a date with somebody that you don't even. It's not even. You don't even like them. You don't. You can't even process it because you're like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. You just go home, you're devastated. Like, just know. Just give yourself the permission to be completely fucked up by this. You will be incredibly sad. This is like, this is a betrayal. And it's somebody that's not. At the very least, this wasn't handled the correct way. Right. At the very least, what you want for somebody who you've been in a four year relationship with, when they know it's over, to break it off in a considerate way, be far away from you when they start dating somebody else. Like, the fact this is in your, you know, the fact you're even aware of this is up. This should be something that you find out. You know, Facebook. Yeah. This should be something you find out eight months later and you have a devastating couple days. But you're like, ultimately, what am I gonna do? He was always gonna date somebody else. Not the second. You're trying to process the breakup. You also have to.

[Robert Oberst]

And you still see him when he comes home from work. You know.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

The only thing too, I'd want to say is just like, like we were saying about the momentum. When you get a chance, lift your head up and breathe. You know, like Tupac. Keep your head up like that. Just taking a moment to separate yourself from the chaos, even though you're still sitting in it. Just a moment where you can kind of like look at yourself from above. Even if it's 20 seconds. Like that could change the outcome of your life. Just one silly decision here or there. You don't know. Like, like it's, it's.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

100.

[Eldis]

You want to give yourself permission to feel bad and not be, you know, mean to yourself, but at the same time, don't do something that'll you up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Right.

[Eldis]

You know, long term and, you know, hopefully you're old, mature enough and like, you're. This isn't. If you've been in a four year relationship, you're. You're hopefully not like, you know. Yeah. I mean, unless you are young as hell, which I don't think so because she was saying she thought it. The problem is not even the four years like she thought this was.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And for that person to pull the rug out from under you is just really, really tough. But you will get over this. It will take too long. Like, you won't feel good for at least a minimum a year, to be honest with you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And then it's like. And then you just have to rebuild. Like, up. Things happen to people. This is a fucked Up. Thing that happened to you. We're sorry. And you just have to sort of believe in yourself and not, you know, feel this, let it run through you, but also don't let it completely your shit up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Stay.

[Eldis]

Stay on top of work. Stay on top of your. On top of your. Even your social connections to your friends. And, you know, not dating yet, but, like, you don't want to go into a cocoon because, you know, that happens, too, with breakups sometimes.

[Robert Oberst]

Exactly. Yeah. As long as she doesn't work out. We got a guy for her.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Robert's totally right like that. If you have, like, the moment to take a second, like, that's where, like, mindfulness practices and really come in handy at times like this.

[Eldis]

He was catholic before going eastern with it now food.

[Stavros Halkias]

But like, you. You don't want to, like, compound things with some other crazy that you invite into your life by, like, how emotional you're feeling, so.

[Robert Oberst]

I've made so many bad emotional decisions.

[Eldis]

In my life, you know, like, worst one, go. No kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Anyways, give me, like, number nine. I don't know. I mean, I know an example. I don't. I don't.

[Robert Oberst]

No, but, like, you know, you. You get you. I'm 40 now, so, like, I look back and I'm like. Like, I. So many times I could have had. Be a reset moment, and instead I just let it keep slipping.

[Eldis]

Oh, for sure. I've definitely had those moments, too, for. You know, and it's different stuff for everybody. Addiction does it for people. You know, trauma, hap. You know, other traumatic experience, death, you know, you know, the. A loss of a. Of a. Of a loved one break. Breakups can happen. You know what I mean? Like, all of these are the kinds of things that can completely derail things, but they can also be big reset moments. So let this be one of those for you. And ultimately, as this doesn't help to hear now, but that's not the. You wanted to marry. If this is the kind of person exactly. That treats you like this.

[Robert Oberst]

He did you a favor.

[Eldis]

It was good. It was either now or it's like 10 years later when you have a kid, and it's, like, even worse. Right. So good luck. Sorry. Brutal stuff. We're not gonna lie. We're your friends, so we're not gonna lie to you. But we are rooting for you. Big Eld.

[Robert Oberst]

What's up, Stav?

[Eldis]

Longtime listener, first time caller.

[Robert Oberst]

What's up?

[Eldis]

Eldest, esteemed guest. Without giving away too much, I have A job at a kind of well known university and like a public facing job at sporting events and you know, for the most people are really, really positive and really nice, but every once.

[Stavros Halkias]

In a while you get.

[Eldis]

You accidentally run across some like, pretty mean comments. So I guess I was just wondering, like, how do you deal with any sort of negative feedback? All right.

[Unknown]

And how do you kind of just.

[Eldis]

Like move on through that?

[Stavros Halkias]

Because you're obviously way more well known than I'll ever really be, so.

[Eldis]

Thanks again. Love the show.

[Robert Oberst]

He's talking about people coming up to him in costume and not being cool.

[Eldis]

Being like, being like, Alabama's gay.

[Robert Oberst]

How do you deal with being the asshole?

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah. How does it. How do I deal with.

[Stavros Halkias]

They don't hate you. They hate the Gonzaga bulldogs.

[Eldis]

Yeah, I mean, that's true. I mean, you know, you gotta get.

[Robert Oberst]

That a lot though. Like the, the like, what's up, big boy? Can I pick you up? Can I. Can I do this?

[Eldis]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. And I think, like a little lot of it is. I mean, the e. The. The best thing to do is to just let them sit in their comment for me. Anyway, this is.

[Robert Oberst]

That's a good move.

[Eldis]

This is hard because these people. This is different a little bit, right? Because like, these people think they're being funny. Like, they think I'm gonna. They. They just think. They say something, it's gonna be funny. They don't understand that it's rude. They don't know me.

[Robert Oberst]

That you've been hearing that over and over since you.

[Eldis]

Not original. Even if they had a good one, you know, if it was a good one. One sometimes I have, like, not that it. Not that I'm encouraging people to say anything, but like, I'll talk to somebody and they say something good and it's like, oh, we haven't even brought this up. The guy at the pho restaurant, I got roasted to smithereens where we. Me. We were. We were. We were at. We were getting pho. It was. Wait, were you.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I wasn't here.

[Eldis]

Straight George. Yeah, yeah, it was straight George, the nutrition expert. It was me, George and Eldis, and we were sitting to get Phoenix. This guy doesn't know who I am at all, right? We're ordering. And I, I had just gotten over food poisoning, so I'm like, we want to get soup. Something kind of light. And I order a small bowl of. And the guy goes small, doesn't know me at all. Literally catches me off guard in a way because, like, I thought it's like, you know, you don't bring your gun. It's like a, you know, yeah, you're a gunslinger. But I left it with my horse. I meant I'm at a safe. I'm at a salute where my protection has been. You know what I mean? Like, he completely caught me off guard. I'm flat footed.

[Robert Oberst]

You're at the big and tall.

[Eldis]

Exactly. It's like, it's crazy how I had nothing. I couldn't even, like, get him back. I was just, like, shocked. But you know what? I was laughing because he did get me. You know what I mean? But yeah, that guy.

[Robert Oberst]

Rare, though, for you guys.

[Eldis]

Super rare.

[Robert Oberst]

Every single one of you thinks you're gonna be the one to do that.

[Eldis]

But that's also why it worked, because he had no idea who I was. It was. Was just like. So it's also like, such bad customer service because it's like, yeah, I'm a comedian, right? I found it funny. My friends found it funny because we bust on each other. Like, this is a story we'll tell forever. It's. It. Actually, he did, in a weird way, because of how we're set up, enrich our lives. But we were talking and it was like, imagine if we're like guys that work together and I'm a fat guy who's insecure about how much he eats.

[Robert Oberst]

Oh, yeah.

[Eldis]

And the waiter's like, really? You fat fucking slug. You're gonna eat a small soup? That was a wild move, bro. But in terms of general negativity, like, yeah, I like to let people sit in it, like, because they'll usually say something incredibly ignorant or they'll say something, whatever. You ignore a lot of it, right? Like, again, I'm guessing you're a mascot. I would say just do a backflip away from them if I were you. You know, shoot it. Shoot them in the face with a T shirt gun.

[Robert Oberst]

If you're. If you're a mascot or a comedian or a public figure, you've got to have, like a repertoire of responses in the back pocket. Like, I can't tell you how many times people ask me to arm wrestle or whatever. So, like, I have some. I literally have, like five things. I. I've. I used. I used to go, I've changed it. I used to be a little bit harsher. Now I make a joke. Now, like, it's the same joke over and over and over. And it's like, literally, I say that, like 20 times a day, right?

[Eldis]

So that's got to be brutal.

[Robert Oberst]

If you're a mascot. And people keep coming over, like, trying to pull your tail or whatever. Like you have something prepared.

[Eldis]

Yeah, you have to have something prepared.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like pepper spray or a knife or something.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

[Stavros Halkias]

Don't get caught. Lacking in a suit.

[Eldis]

Yeah. But yeah, in general, man, it's like you kind of. You gotta let as much as you can roll off your back.

[Stavros Halkias]

He calls back, he's like, I'm the quarterback of Texas football.

[Eldis]

It's Arch Manning or. No, it's the other guy that got. Who was. Yeah, yeah. Everybody's begging for Arch Manning.

[Robert Oberst]

Signed to Texas, didn't he?

[Eldis]

Yeah, he's playing there. Yeah. So, yeah, dude, I don't know.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's like, that Wilt Chamberlain story. Have something in the back pocket where, like, someone said, hey, how's the weather up there? And he spit on their head and he said, it's raining.

[Robert Oberst]

What a savage. I just saw him completely. Pete. Like, he did, like, a track and field thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And destroyed it. It's so crazy, like, watching a guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who'S, like, barely trained for it.

[Robert Oberst]

Just the way he moved, man.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did the high jump, like.

[Eldis]

And this is obviously an old video. He's dead, right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, no, he died, like, like 15 years ago. But he had, like, a cap on and he was like. He did the high jump with no training and did, like, jumped into hay.

[Robert Oberst]

Like. Like, they jump with their stomach towards the bar.

[Stavros Halkias]

He used to live with Arnold. Hey, he lifted with Arnold. Arnold said it was one of the strongest athletes he's ever seen.

[Robert Oberst]

I saw him. He did Conan. Like, he was in one of the. Conan.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

And there's a very famous photo with Arnold. Andre the Giant, who was my hero growing up. And. And it's. It's. Not Kareem Abdul Jabbar. It's.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's Will Chamberlain.

[Eldis]

It's definitely Will. Yeah, Conan. I'm pretty sure it's all right.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. Will was the one that was Bruce Lee's movie.

[Eldis]

Yeah. Kareem was in Bruce.

[Robert Oberst]

No, no, Kareem was.

[Eldis]

Was in Bruce Lee. Wilt was in Conan. Conan.

[Robert Oberst]

Okay.

[Eldis]

I'm pretty sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Because. Because Arnold has a story about working with Wilt. And, like, Wilt was going to jump off, I think. And Garnel was like. And then Wilt, he said to me, arnold, here I am coming. And then he jumped off the cliff or something, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he said, like, he was a beast athlete. Like, he'd work out with the Gold's Gym guys. And just at, like, age 50, Magic.

[Robert Oberst]

Johnson's in Gold's Gym, Venice.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really?

[Robert Oberst]

Like, five times a week, kick chicken ass.

[Eldis]

Damn.

[Robert Oberst]

Still?

[Eldis]

That's awesome.

[Robert Oberst]

I. I still haven't had the balls to go up to him, but I want to. Like, I see him, I geek out a little bit. One of my favorites.

[Eldis]

Cool. Yeah. He is in insane shape for still, like, old, having hiv, the whole thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I don't think. Yeah, I don't. Like, he's got, like.

[Eldis]

Literally, it's untraceable at this point, which is wild. Yeah, that is cool. Salute to science for making hiv.

[Robert Oberst]

Science and money, baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or did you know that? You must know, since Andre the Giant is your hero, because it just struck me like, you were a theater kid, and then you became a gigantic strongman. You know, Andre the Giant was, like, when he was a kid, he would get driven to school by Samuel Beckett, the playwright. Like, they were friends.

[Robert Oberst]

No, I didn't know that.

[Stavros Halkias]

He was, like, 15. He was this gigantic kid, and, like, they just struck up a friendship. They lived in, like, the same.

[Eldis]

Is that true? Yeah, I read that, and I thought it was, like, one of those Internet hoax articles.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, I choose to believe.

[Eldis]

Yeah, it sounds right. Yeah. Now. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

I just didn't do the. I just didn't do the research. It just sounded so cool that I was like, that's awesome.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. I freaking loved Andre. Like, Princess Bride was one of my favorites.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, people throw around the word legend a lot, but, like, that's a legend. Yeah. Never suspect they're not. He could drink.

[Robert Oberst]

I went and hung out. We're doing interview stuff. I hung out with Roddy Piper.

[Eldis]

Oh, yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Two months before he passed was at a baseball game in Pennsylvania. And he was so cool. Like, the coolest dude. Hung out with us for, like, hours. Like, just super cool. And the whole time, he was just like, don't ever be a wrestler, man. Don't ever be a wrestler. Like, just begging me. And then he kept telling me all these stories about Andre and all this stuff. He was telling me the story, and I think I'd heard it on. On a podcast somewhere. Someone else told it, but they were on a flight, and Andre obviously didn't fit in bathrooms on a flight. So they were flying, and I think it was an overseas flight. And so what they had to do was they just took, like, clear tarp and they put it all through the cockpit part where, you know, where they make the food and everything. They covered that in the tarp, and. And Roddy had to hold Andre's hands while he leaned back over the tarp and just all the way.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's in a deep squat.

[Robert Oberst]

Then they wrap that up and then they put that there on the plane for the rest of the flight.

[Eldis]

Elder's gonna do that in the tour. Busy on the tour bus.

[Unknown]

Yeah, we've been talking a lot about the tour. That's been like, the extent of my tour managing. Just really worried about where we can sit. When will.

[Eldis]

She says so many.

[Unknown]

Can I sit on the bus?

[Eldis]

The driver explicitly told him no on the bus.

[Robert Oberst]

That's the rule, you know?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Trust me. That's the. Had a call.

[Unknown]

I had a call with him. He was like, you can't. On the bus, you know, I was like, yeah, we've been talking about.

[Eldis]

You can tell from your voice all your photos.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, that guy's suspect number one. We need, like, an emergency bin full of, like, those Glade scent bombs or something just in case of an emergency.

[Eldis]

All right, well, yeah, that guy. Got another question. Eldis, it's getting late. We gotta start. We gotta get high and watch Friday.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, we got urgent business, so we'll.

[Eldis]

Do maybe two more.

[Unknown]

Hey, elders.

Hey, Styles.

[Eldis]

For some background, I'm a young woman.

[Unknown]

I'm in my early 20s, and I really like having sex.

[Eldis]

But a problem I've kind of run.

[Unknown]

Into or that's manifested is that I feel like I don't always contribute enough.

[Eldis]

Into, like, the physical actions of it.

[Unknown]

Like, it feels more like I'm getting fucked.

[Eldis]

And like, ideally we should be each other. Interesting. And so I'm seeking advice on how to engage more and be exciting.

[Unknown]

Some other background. I'm a fat woman, so I feel like that sometimes limits the range of things.

[Eldis]

But also I feel like that's not.

[Unknown]

A great excuse because, like, sure, in my crease. That doesn't affect fat men as much. So I don't know what the. I don't know if it's a mental thing going on.

[Eldis]

Additionally, things are covered in the head department. Don't need advice there. Well, one of the most redeeming factors.

[Unknown]

Of the overall experience, I guess that's huge.

[Eldis]

But otherwise, yeah.

[Unknown]

Get some moves and some advice.

[Eldis]

What do you guys like? Thanks.

[Robert Oberst]

Have you ever told, like, literally in. In real life, have you ever honestly told a girl anything but that she was amazing ahead?

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't think I've ever given a negative head review.

[Robert Oberst]

There's nobody.

[Eldis]

But I also haven't been effusively. Haven't effusively praised anyone who didn't Deserve it. Okay, but, like, I'll say that was good. Or. Right.

[Robert Oberst]

Well, that's all that it takes.

[Eldis]

But, like, I'll really make it clear. I mean it.

[Robert Oberst]

Right. But the girl who sucks at it, she doesn't get to see all the other ones. She doesn't know. She just thinks she's good.

[Eldis]

I believe our friend big girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is. That is a stereotype I do find holds some truth.

[Stavros Halkias]

If I were to say anything negative about a girl who gave me head, I would feel like an Italian grandmother had served me a meal and I, like, critiqued the pasta. I'm not gonna try to.

[Eldis]

Well, I mean, there are. There. Hold on a second. There is horrific head out there that does exist.

[Stavros Halkias]

If it's painful. Yeah. You got to say something.

[Eldis]

I'm trying to think now. I'm trying to think. One girl wouldn't give me head because I was uncircumcised and that was up. But I guess, no, I haven't.

[Robert Oberst]

A Mormon girl.

[Eldis]

No. Well, used to be, which actually is awesome, you know, like an ex Mormon.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, yeah.

[Eldis]

Super freak, let's just say. Yeah, exactly. There was no problem with head at.

[Robert Oberst]

All or the back door, because they're used to it.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's. That's what having sex is to them. Because, you know, God. God. Mormon God is okay with you getting in your ass.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tricking God.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Closed eye to the brown.

[Eldis]

He doesn't look. Yeah, yeah. It's like. That's like the blind spot spotted with a security camera is a woman's.

[Robert Oberst]

Joseph Smith said that. I was baptized Mormon when I was 11.

[Eldis]

What the.

[Robert Oberst]

And my parents were pretending because we were so poor, we had no food. And the Mormon church feeds their people very well.

[Stavros Halkias]

Interesting.

[Robert Oberst]

So we started going to church, and I did baptisms for the dead and everything. I. I don't think my parents really thought they were faking just for their sake.

[Eldis]

Sure.

[Robert Oberst]

Sure. I think they thought they were trying, but it was really just. We were down and out.

[Eldis]

Yeah, but that's a good idea to just go to a different religion every six months. The ones that feed you.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. More Deseret Industries takes. I'm like. Like, we would have. Like, they make the best beef stew I've ever had. But, like. Like, pantries full of food. All your milk, all your cheese, all that.

[Eldis]

Really?

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah. Like. And they also would help out with other things. They don't do it for everybody, but, like, they definitely. They give food to all their members and all that stuff, too.

[Eldis]

That's that is a. You know, if all religions did, that would be a lot better off.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a good way to scope it out, figure out what you want to be like. What's the spread like at the Baha' I temple?

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

See what kind of snacks we got. The Catholics famously bad at snacks.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah. You are buying gold crosses for the priests. How about a. How about some Dinty Moore? Anyway, back to our friends.

[Stavros Halkias]

What was her issue again?

[Eldis]

I know she's want. She feels like she's not doing enough to.

[Robert Oberst]

Now.

[Eldis]

Now, I would say if you're going crazy with head, that's good. I mean, that's a great place to start. In terms of the actual coitus here. What do you really want to do? You just don't want to get. You don't want to be a passive participant. I mean, then ride some dick, I think is the number one maneuver. Do the kind of like. And you know, if you're a big. If you're a bigger girl, I get that. You know, I'm doing bodyweight squats. My knees hurt. You might need to fucking bulletproof your knees. You know, you may do some. Some work like. Dick riding is actually the number one way a woman can apply herself. I think we can all agree. And a sign of a pillow princess is someone who won't ride dick for longer than a couple minutes. Don't be one of those people. Right. I mean, whatever you want to be that personally, you know, most of it is fucking for. I don't really give a fuck.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

Exactly.

[Eldis]

I'm fine looking at titties bauble while I fuck a bust. That's cool with me. But you know, if. If this is something she wants to work towards, maybe do the kind, you know, riding dick. Absolutely. Being a. An active participant in doggy style sex can be fun. If a girl pushes back on your dick a little bit sometimes. Some. You know, I've been around people who do a little too much leg locking for my taste. You know what I mean? Or they'll play with legs or whatever.

[Stavros Halkias]

The mobility.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

I've had girls, when they finish, they. They lock like.

[Eldis]

I like that. That's different. That's cool.

[Robert Oberst]

Finished right before. It's the worst.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something I even like. I even like the, the, the. That makes me feel like, you know, the final boss is getting desperate and throwing all its finishing moves at me to make me not make a girl come. And I like persevering over. I like that. But, but I just mean like, you Know, these are the. These are the common things. I think if everyone's having a good time, if you're sucking dick like an animal, if you maybe want to bounce on some dick a little more, I think that's. Those are my main. You know, Those are my main. If you're. If you're covered in the head department, I think you're pretty good here with.

[Robert Oberst]

With oral and with just regular vaginal. Like this feels like a fucking. What's that? Loveline.

[Eldis]

Kind of like that. Whether we consider ourselves one of the spiritual successors to love life.

[Robert Oberst]

Vaginal felt love line.

[Eldis]

Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

So whether you're giving head or.

[Eldis]

Yeah, there we go.

[Robert Oberst]

Either way, a little noise goes a long way.

[Eldis]

True.

[Robert Oberst]

A long way.

[Eldis]

A little neck kiss here and there. Yeah.

[Robert Oberst]

Kiss. I like ears, but, like, you know, from both sides.

[Eldis]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

I wonder if she's, like, enjoying it or what she's thinking. If she's, like, feeling self conscious during it. Like, you know, am I good on my bad?

[Eldis]

Right.

[Unknown]

I feel like the most awesome sex is just like. Like when you achieve ego death and you're just like. You're just getting your.

[Eldis]

On. You're right.

[Unknown]

It's like. It's like, you know, just think about what you can do to get there without, like, just not even thinking about.

[Eldis]

It, but just getting in the zone.

[Robert Oberst]

She's on the right route. It's cool. Like, a lot of girls, they think just showing up is the thing, right?

[Eldis]

Right.

[Robert Oberst]

She's in the game. She's trying to figure out how can we make it better. So they.

[Eldis]

That.

[Robert Oberst]

That right there shows you're in the right.

[Eldis]

Every off season, she comes back with a jump hook.

[Robert Oberst]

You know, been working on my free throw.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's been training with Hakeem Olajuwon at the low post. It all comes back to great centers. But listen, the wise warrior wins the battle before it's even begun. So just enjoy it first and then just go for it.

[Robert Oberst]

The jocko of cocksuck.

[Eldis]

All right, you got something fun for us to go out on here? Hey, Stav. Not a question, but rather a comment on the continuing unfolding nature of breast reductions and our opinions about them in society. I was totally on your side. I was like, why would anyone slap God in the face by reducing the size of the breast? However, last night, I got with a girl before she. Before we start getting our clothes off, she tells me she got the breast reduction. I gasped like, no, but then takes her bra off. Stop. I gotta say, they were nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

They were really nice.

[Eldis]

Titties don't need to be that crazy big. I mean, what do you need at most, like a handful, handful and a half that get that little bit of. What is this? You know? Do I come into your house and disrespect you and then he had to go too far? Do I come into your house and tell you your God's not real call your call. Who you pray to, a false prophet? Don't tell me how much titties I.

[Robert Oberst]

Need more than a handful.

[Eldis]

Don't tell me how many handfuls of tits I need. And by the way, I love titties of all shapes and sizes. I'm just saying, you know, look, I've. I will say I'm less. I'm less of a hard line. No, this is kind of like, you know, I'm evolving.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're not fully anti choice on this matter.

[Eldis]

Yeah, exactly, exactly. It's kind of like how your body stops. Yeah, it's kind of like how even some conservative, you know, pro lifers will be like, all right, incest and. And rape. We can talk about it, right? You show me a up mri. You're back. You. You. All right, we can start talking. Okay. But don't you tell me how many, many types of tits, how big a titty I need. Or like. And like I said, I like all. I like a fat ass titty. I like a little ass titty. They just got to be nice titties. But, you know, let's. Let's not get science involved where we don't need it.

[Robert Oberst]

That's all I'm saying with that joke, you know, the old lady's titty.

[Eldis]

I don't remember.

[Robert Oberst]

Like, do you want to see it? And he's like, yeah. And she flopped it out. Yeah, yeah, she just rolled it back. All titties are good titties.

[Eldis]

Yeah, man. But I will. But I will say, you know, I'd love to know a little more about this woman's situation. I'd love to get specifics, but, you know, don't try and come out here, blanket. You see one pair of nice reduced titties, and you're gonna fucking tell me to change my whole worldview, you fucking piece of shit. And by the way, I've seen some nice reduced titties as well. I'm not a. You know, I'm not saying once you have a reduction, you're a pariah whose tits can't get sucked on anymore. I'm just saying let's. Before we do anything hasty, let's really think Is this surge, Is this medically necessary? That's all. You got me pissed off now, Elvis.

[Robert Oberst]

It's all worked up.

[Eldis]

I'm fucking.

[Robert Oberst]

I knew a girl who had to get the reduction in high school. She was a little, little thing and she had messed up knees. Like, she had knees. No, no, I'm starting. So she had surgery on both knees from something else.

[Eldis]

Okay.

[Robert Oberst]

And as she got older and bigger in the chest, her back started messing up and her knees with it. Like, so she had, you know, it's really up. I just remember this. It was junior high and she had literally just had surgery and I didn't know. And I. I remember we were going to the bus and I went over and I was like, hey, I did that. And I did the complete worst thing a fat guy in love with a girl could do. And I ruined, like, messed up her leg and like, all, like, for the rest of. Of my life. I was known as the fat guy that destroyed her life.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, no.

[Robert Oberst]

Yeah, it was bad. But her, she. She got the reduction and it was phenomenal.

[Eldis]

Nice.

[Robert Oberst]

Phenomenal.

[Eldis]

Good. Well, good for. Look, we, We're. We're not against open debate on this forum. Okay. So we'll hear your oppos.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, if a woman lives in a fifth floor walk up. Sure. We got the reduction. She's killing herself.

[Eldis]

But I want to see, you know, paperwork. Six months of you going to open houses and seeing apartments. Yeah. Again, before. Yeah. We just need to. You need to see a doctor. Yeah. This is my most conservative. This is how. This is my most conservative take. You need to go to. You have a therapist. You have to make sure you want to make your tits smaller. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hands off my titties.

[Eldis]

God bless everyone. God bless all the titties out there. And thank you for listening, everybody. Rob, my man. Thanks for coming. This was so great. You were so funny. And we will, JP, of course. Thank you for being Ed McMahon and Big Strong guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Advice just counts for more.

[Eldis]

Yeah, it does. Yeah. You're gonna listen to a guy who could crush your skull with his hand.

[Robert Oberst]

But I wouldn't.

[Eldis]

But he wouldn't. But he could. Thanks, guys. We will talk to you next time. Bye. Bye. Ryan Seacrest here. When you have a busy schedule, it's important to maximize your downtime. One of the best ways to do that is by going to chumbacasino.com. chumba Casino has all your free favorite social casino games like spin slots, bingo, and solitaire that you can play for free for a chance to redeem some serious prizes. So hop on to chumbacasino.com now and live the Chumba life. Sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[Stavros Halkias]

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[Eldis]

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[Robert Oberst]

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[Unknown]

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