#131 - Steph Tolev

Summary

Stavvy's World – Episode #131: Steph Tolev

Release Date: June 2, 2025
Host: Stavros Halkias
Guest: Steph Tolev

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Introduction

In Episode #131 of Stavvy's World, host Stavros Halkias welcomes comedian and actress Steph Tolev for an engaging and candid conversation. The episode delves into Steph's cultural heritage, her experiences in the entertainment industry, personal relationships, and struggles with self-image and mortality. Amidst their lively banter, they also address listener inquiries, offering heartfelt advice and humor.

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Steph Tolev’s Heritage and Personal Background

The episode kicks off with Steph Tolev sharing insights into her diverse cultural background.
Steph (00:58): “I’m most Bulgarian, but I’m also part Greek, so this is...”
Steph humorously connects her appearance to historical Greek propaganda, sparking a lighthearted discussion about her ancestry.
Stavros (01:04): “I recognize your face from Greek Revolutionary War propaganda... Vanquish the Turks.”

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Discussion on Baptism and Greek Cultural Rituals

Stavros and Steph transition into a conversation about baptism traditions within Greek culture. They reminisce about childhood experiences and the significance of baptism as a godfather.
Stavros (02:09): “The baptism is awesome because you have to... dunk a baby.”
Steph (03:44): “It feels like there's a gust of wind coming out. You're vanquishing a demon.”

The dialogue highlights their humorous yet respectful take on cultural rituals and the blending of personal beliefs with tradition.

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Comedy and Professional Life

Steph shares her journey in the comedy scene, discussing her roles and experiences on various shows.
Steph (06:53): “We have Happy Gilmore on the way.”
They dive into her participation in the AVN Awards, where Steph recounts a memorable encounter with Ryan Powell and her comedic performance.
Steph (09:05): “It was amazing. The men here... I opened on being like, wow, this is the only room in Las Vegas right now with no STDs.”

Stavros admires Steph's ability to tailor her humor to different audiences, emphasizing the importance of authenticity in comedy.
Stavros (09:57): “You just have to do whatever you want, whenever you want.”

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Relationships and Sexuality

A significant portion of the episode explores the complexities of romantic relationships and differing sexual drives.
Steph (23:21): “I cry every night. It’s so demented.”
Stavros (34:38): “Jesus Christ, I can’t fathom it.”

They candidly discuss personal insecurities, body positivity, and the challenges of maintaining intimacy.
Steph (19:51): “It’s the final hurdle to accept even little dicks as aesthetic beauty.”

Their honest dialogue sheds light on societal pressures and the importance of self-acceptance within relationships.

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Weight Loss Journey

Both hosts touch upon their personal battles with weight, highlighting the impact on their health and self-esteem.
Steph (30:26): “I lost 35 pounds, and it’s hard to keep it off.”
Stavros (60:22): “I g. I gained 20 pounds back in the middle of tires.”

They discuss the balance between maintaining physical health and the temptations of an entertainment-centric lifestyle.
Steph (31:33): “No drinking. And I... I've been really hitting it.”

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Listener Q&A: Relationships and Personal Issues

Towards the end of the episode, Stavros and Steph address listener voicemails, offering advice on relationship dynamics and personal growth.

1. Caller D – Navigating Different Sex Drives (70:06):
   A listener seeks advice on balancing differing sexual desires after deciding to move in together.
   Stavros (75:39): “Keep everything we said in mind. Think critically about whether you are truly getting your needs met.”

2. Caller E – Accelerating Marriage Timelines (78:22):
   Another listener contemplates whether her partner is pressuring her to marry due to external pressures, such as living with conservative parents.
   Steph (85:11): “Suck her STD free right now. Get her out of your house.”

3. Caller F – Making Friends in a New Environment (86:06):
   A listener struggles with making friends after relocating from the East Coast to California, seeking strategies to build meaningful connections.
   Steph (89:20): “Maybe try that if you want that.”

4. Offbeat Ads and Fun Banter:
   Throughout the Q&A, Stavros and Steph maintain their signature humor, occasionally interjecting playful remarks and comments about their own lives, keeping the tone light-hearted and relatable.

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Conclusion

Episode #131 of Stavvy's World offers a blend of humor, heartfelt conversation, and practical advice. Stavros Halkias and Steph Tolev navigate personal topics with openness and wit, creating an engaging listening experience for audiences seeking both entertainment and genuine discourse. The episode underscores the importance of cultural heritage, self-acceptance, and effective communication in personal relationships.

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Notable Quotes:

• Stavros (03:44): “It feels like there's a gust of wind coming out. You're vanquishing a demon.”
• Steph (19:51): “It’s the final hurdle to accept even little dicks as aesthetic beauty.”
• Stavros (75:39): “Keep everything we said in mind. Think critically about whether you are truly getting your needs met.”
• Steph (85:11): “Suck her STD free right now. Get her out of your house.”

---

Timestamps:

• 00:58: Introduction of Steph Tolev’s heritage.
• 02:09: Discussion on baptism rituals.
• 09:05: Steph recounts AVN Awards experience.
• 19:51: Conversation on body positivity.
• 30:26: Steph discusses her weight loss journey.
• 70:06: Listener Caller D’s question.
• 78:22: Listener Caller E’s question.
• 86:06: Listener Caller F’s question.

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Final Thoughts:

Stavvy's World continues to deliver insightful and entertaining content, with Episode #131 showcasing the dynamic chemistry between Stavros Halkias and Steph Tolev. Their ability to blend personal anecdotes with broader societal issues makes for a compelling and relatable podcast episode.

Transcript

[Stavros Halkias]

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[Steph Tolev]

I feel so at home here. Yeah, I'm so. You know, I'm. I'm most Bulgarian, but I'm also part Greek, so this is. Look.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Look at this.

[Stavros Halkias]

I know. I mean, I recognize your face from, like, Greek Revolutionary War propaganda.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, you literally, there's. That face has been like, you know, and it says, like, vanquish the Turks.

[Steph Tolev]

Small penis, huge balls. That's me. Small.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, there's a. Yeah, yeah, there's a. There's one lady in particular who I. I don't even know. It was. We had some. You know, when you're fighting the Ottomans, you even let the gals get a sword.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, yeah. You're getting desperate.

[Stavros Halkias]

So everybody was fighting. We had this lady, Bubulina.

[Steph Tolev]

Bubulina.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bubulina. Yeah. Wasn't fat. Even though that is a fat lady's name. And she was like. She was really not. She was like a sailing genius or some shit.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's been a while since I've brushed up on my. But that's the one lady from Greek Revolutionary War that I think, you know, that I remember.

[Steph Tolev]

I have to do nothing. I'm ready to. There's no costume. Let the mullet grow in a little longer.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. A head scarf. And just the end of the mullet coming out.

[Steph Tolev]

Just the little peaks.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Nice. I could do that easily.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nice.

[Steph Tolev]

This is nice. I love this. Were you baptized?

[Stavros Halkias]

I was.

[Steph Tolev]

Shame.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

There we go. Naked.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah. Naked.

[Steph Tolev]

Bizarre thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Naked. They dunked the little kids in.

[Steph Tolev]

I kept, like, joking to my family that I wanted to get baptized now and just really freaked them out. Full woman. Just hello. Just full puss. Just sitting there, just staring. You wanted this.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think. I think they'll let you go back. I think they'll let you go. Bathing suit now.

[Steph Tolev]

No, no, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

Go.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, I'm doing full. If you want me in there, I want my creepy uncle staring at it. He's always wanted to see it. I. I'll be front center, ready to go.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Hell yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

That's exactly it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I do. The baptism is. It's. It's awesome because you have to. Cuz, you know, my brother recently had a kid. My best friend's had a kid. And I was just like, thinking about, like, if I'm ever in the godfather position, you have to just like, I like the ritual as up as it is, like, dunk a baby. And it's like he just has a bad day. Like, you know, actually one of my friends, he. The baby was like, kind of sick, but, like, people had flown in from Greece, people flown in from like half across America. And it was like he learned his first lesson of, like, the show must go on at like 11 months old where he's just like, he just wants to fucking hang out and we're just dunking his ass.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, my God.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I do like the ritual, I have to admit. Like, the rituals. I'm not religious. And you have to be. If you're a godfather or godmother, whatever, you have to be like, do you renounce Satan? They make you say you renounce Satan a bunch.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. And yes. And then you have the spit, the fake spitting. I just did this to my sister's baby too. And I was like, I'm really spitting here. But then the guy gave me the thing to read and he gives me the microphone and I'm killing it. I'm like, I denounce Satan. And I'm getting. He's like, oh, she's good.

[Stavros Halkias]

It feels powerful. I denounced Satan. You feel like there's like a gust of wind is going to come out. You're like vanquishing a demon. It feels like the Exorcist. You're like, get back, Satan. Yeah, it's very powerful stuff.

[Steph Tolev]

Powerful. And then he, like, after the thing, he asked my dad, he goes, what is. What does this daughter do? She's very good at speaking. And my dad's like, oh, she's a comedian. He goes, oh, can you write her name down? My dad's like, I'm. No, no, I can't give you.

[Stavros Halkias]

You will hate Megan.

[Steph Tolev]

Anybody but me. Write name.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I know. I mean, Greek people all the time. Greek churches have like, you know, they'll have like, dances, whatever. And the amount of times they've asked me to do standup at a Greek function, it's like, you don't want this, guys.

[Steph Tolev]

Trust me. You don't want this at all. I don' this.

[Stavros Halkias]

They have a. They built like this big hall in my neighborhood when I was growing up. We had the Greek festival there. It is kind of nice. And part of me is like, it would be funny to just like rent it and do a show at the like, Greek. Where The Greek festival was from my youth.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, with like your fans?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, with my fans. But the problem is, I know because they're like church owned. So it's like people would like sneak in, you know what I mean?

[Steph Tolev]

And they probably wouldn't pay because they're like, it's the church.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah. And yeah, that's the other thing. It's like, you know, they would guilt you into just donating the money.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. And it's like, you're like, I'm not doing it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Come on, let's not get crazy. I'm not donating it to. We're good.

[Steph Tolev]

We're good. This is my money.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jesus is fine. I've seen all the gold leaf and all the ornate costumes and like that. Yeah, they're dripped out.

[Steph Tolev]

They are.

[Stavros Halkias]

They're truly dripped.

[Steph Tolev]

You're seeing them like walk to their cars after they take their little.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Church outfits off. They're like rolling out in a Mercedes. You're like, you're. You're doing good.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, they definitely are. So you were baptized. So wait, where. Where in Canada did you grow up?

[Steph Tolev]

Toronto.

[Stavros Halkias]

In Toronto?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, the actual Toronto. There's this one Bulgarian church in Toronto and it was actually in the project. It was so ghetto. So. Yeah, I think you probably same thing where you have to walk around Easter. You walk around outside the church with.

[Stavros Halkias]

A. Candles, of course.

[Steph Tolev]

Then all of a sudden we hear gunshots. Like, okay, it was so up.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's. That was the church. I. That my church was the shitty. Like, because they don't know Baltimore and like we. You know, and when I was growing up, it was shitty and you could tell. And in the 90s, they made. There were enough Greeks where there's like, you know, they made like three other churches in the burbs, but St. Nick's we're hanging on strong, baby. Right there on the street. Yep. The 500 block and the area has gotten a little better. You know, we. What happened was there was a Greek. There was a. You know, there's always disgrace with local politicians in Baltimore. And I think like there was a police commissioner that like was embezzling or something. And the like interim guy was just happened to be a Greek guy like this some lieutenant and he just like diverted so many funds to Greek town and they just started like completely breaking, you know, civil rights laws and just arresting whoever. And they just went full Rudy Giuliani on it until, you know, that guy also lost his job. And I think that was enough for the. The conservative Greeks that moved to the burbs were like, you know what? We like what was going on over there? We'll come back.

[Steph Tolev]

We're coming back.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, we'll come back. So it's been a little gentrified, but.

[Steph Tolev]

Did you watch that movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding?

[Stavros Halkias]

Said, I watch it.

[Steph Tolev]

So that house was right on the corner of my parents house. That's what I walked there from high school every day. We'd walk by and always be like, just let me be an extra.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

I'd linger around outside like, hello. What the heck?

[Stavros Halkias]

They had Joey Fotona. That was as a youth.

[Steph Tolev]

Tone cannot act as a youth.

[Stavros Halkias]

That pissed me the fuck off. I hate that because it's like, look. And disrespected Joy Fatone.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm disrespecting. His acting is bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. I don't. I didn't even care about the acting. I was just like, this man is not Greek. Like, I was mad. Like I had the original. Like, they're taking our stories and they're putting Italians. They're just substituting Italians for Greeks. And maybe, you know, you know, Nia Vardalos is a hero in the Greek community. I won't hear a bad word about her. Okay, Maybe she needed that NSYNC bump, you know?

[Steph Tolev]

She did. I think, I think was in there. That was a good bump. Sctv definitely. So funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no, it was. It was. Well, but I just think it's like a. Every. When you're making an indie movie, every little. Oh, and the guy from NSYNC is. You know what I mean? Like every little, you know, sprinkling. Like I definitely, when I made my movie, I was just like, whoever the. And I got a lot of, you know, I got a lot of my friends. But then, you know, we got. The production company just knew. CM Punk the wrestler. He's the man. He was awesome. He's famous as. And he was really good in his role. But we were just like, yeah, let's get CM Punk in the mix.

[Steph Tolev]

I need one I am writing something right now. And I. I ran into Marshawn lynch at the porn awards before he remembered me. I'm like, I'm writing a movie. I want to do it. He's like, all right. I'm like, I will use anybody I've ever met my life. I don't give a shit's ass. What the.

[Stavros Halkias]

I love that. You could have been. You could have been casting at the porn. Oh, yeah. Because you hosted the.

[Steph Tolev]

I hosted the Avian Awards.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm jealous. That's honestly a thank you so much. A career goal of min.

[Steph Tolev]

It. Here's the thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

It was amazing.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

The men here, maybe you'd be different.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

But they were so happy with me because they'd had male comedians for the last 10 years making fun of them. This is their awards. They don't want to be made fun of. They want to feel like they're part of it. I opened on being like, wow, this is the only room in Las Vegas right now with no STDs.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And they were like, what?

[Stavros Halkias]

Positive joke. They didn't understand it.

[Steph Tolev]

And they were like, so the whole thing was just me, like making fun of myself. And then I kind of made fun of how disgusting men are in porn. But like the rest of it.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's great though. That's fun.

[Steph Tolev]

They loved it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think that's fun because it's like, that's a inside joke.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not. Because especially I probably when they're saying making fun of them and when people make fun of that industry, it's so much misogyny. Oh, that's just like thinly veiled is like moral. But you're right, they don't go after the guys. No, they always go after, like the women in that industry. So I feel like they even just on the dudes was probably like a breath of fresh air.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes. And I call. I had like three name references. And like they stood up and cheered like Charles Darrow. If you know that guy. He's like so scruffy. He's like, I said that I have a thicker happy trail than him. Yes, you do. What the hell is going on? He's so into it.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's awesome.

[Steph Tolev]

But I started beef with this one guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, nice.

[Steph Tolev]

So there was like this. The pre opening show thing was like this guy, Ryan Powell has this a big podcast. He wanted to have these. I guess porn starts telling stories. Funny stories.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right? Right.

[Steph Tolev]

Stick to the sucking the clock. Not so funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. You don't want us taking two Dicks at the same time.

[Steph Tolev]

Trust me, I would. My double penetration. You call the police. I'd be everywhere. My hemorrhoids would be out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Guys would be sad.

[Steph Tolev]

The guys would be hard.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. The police have. They were in a blanket. They're, like, shivering.

[Steph Tolev]

They're crying. First I cried, but, like, I go on stage and there's these three porn stars, two women and men. I've never seen this guy in my life. So I walk up and I'm like, who the hell are you? He's already judging me, and I'm already annoyed by him. He's.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's like, so he's the funny guy in porn?

[Steph Tolev]

He's supposed to be the funny guy in porn. Everyone knows him. I've never seen this guy in my life.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's on this panel, Big Issue. The funny person in a. And who's not actually funny.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

But is for their thing when an actual funny person comes around. They hate that.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, he hated it. So he's already. I can see this much. I go, who the hell are you? I go. I go, you, you porn star. And the crowd's kind of like, gasping. And I go, you look like a cruise ship magician. Hated that. Hated. So I do my story. It's fine. There's no light on the stage. I'm screaming at people. I do. Well, everyone else gives me a 10 out of 10 for my story. Gets to him. He gives me four. I go, oh, is it because I called you magician? Because he's not funny. Whatever. And I go, okay. And then he goes, yeah, at least my. No, at least my dick is bigger than that fucking nose of yours. And I go, well, at least I don't have to inject mine to get it hard. It's just naturally like this. And I didn't realize there was rumors that he injects his penis. So the whole crowd is like, I've never gotten a bigger pop in my life. People were, like, losing their money.

[Stavros Halkias]

You just randomly got him.

[Steph Tolev]

And then he got so pissed.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's beautiful.

[Steph Tolev]

And he goes, yeah, well, no one wants to you anyways. I go, I hope not. If you want to me, you want to. Danny DeVito's penguin. Nobody wants to this. And then that got him again. So now I, like, I'm on a roll. He got so pissed.

[Stavros Halkias]

You judo rolled into his. Into his, like, choke.

[Steph Tolev]

You're like, ugh, yeah, okay. Make fun of my nose, asshole. As if I haven't. I love when people troll me with my nose.

[Stavros Halkias]

They're like.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, you think I walk around with this going, what a tiny little petite nose I have.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You think I don't like.

[Stavros Halkias]

You don't have like. You've had. You've had to cut 20 minutes of jokes.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Literally, you're like. It's getting too much.

[Steph Tolev]

It's hack now. Yeah. 2K and Sam Penguin. Whatever the. Yeah, I know. I know. What I look like Nosferatu. I just watched it. I'm like.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Steph Tolev]

Put a bald cap on me. It's like scary. But yeah, I was like.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was.

[Steph Tolev]

Anyway, so the whole. That was sort of like a riff and then I got like. Like I was into it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's awesome.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So he was a poor. He's a porn star.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. It's what's weird. I've never.

[Stavros Halkias]

There is. I watched something weird is going. Well, first of all, to know male porn stars, that's a mental illness. You know what I mean? Like. Like when straight guys who beat off so much.

[Steph Tolev]

No. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That they have preferences. And not even in a gay way, just in like I. I like the way he. The girls I jack off to. Or like. Like that's when we start going.

[Steph Tolev]

When you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, when you can tell like what you know. You know their balls from the. From the behind. From the doggy angle. That horrible angle that I understand who's. Who's enjoying that. It's like mostly his ass and just a little bit of the girl underneath. When you know, like, what is that? His nuts? That's a problem.

[Steph Tolev]

Who's that for? Honestly? Who is that for?

[Stavros Halkias]

I guess. I guess that's from, you know, back a vestige before gay porn was widely available.

[Steph Tolev]

That's my only guess that makes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because from that angle you can kind of be like, maybe he's fucking a guy. Yeah, yeah. Ye. That's my only. You know the way every movie had to have tits in it in the 70s and 80s cuz like kids would go to jack all. You know what I mean? Like the way Porky's was just like. Well, disgusting. Yeah. But it was mostly a pornography vehicle. It's like. It's celery and the tits were the dip that you're eating. No one cares about the. No one cares about the Story of Porky, you know? Yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Artichoke.

[Stavros Halkias]

Exactly.

[Steph Tolev]

I just saw what Sebastian. Stan's dick. And what's that? What's the guy. Sebastian stands.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

In a different man. I love the full dick and balls.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, I didn't even know you See his dick?

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, I had a nice gander. Yeah. It's just. It's just nice to have. It's a change up that guy. It should be both.

[Stavros Halkias]

I agree. Well, first of all, we've gotten away from tits in movies in a way that pisses me off.

[Steph Tolev]

Have we?

[Stavros Halkias]

I think so.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, wow, you had that so ready. Jesus Christ.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think like action movies, I mean, nudity in general. I think film is a. You should be. It should be like, sure, it can be high minded, but it should also be cheap Thrills, you know, where it's like every action movie used to have just a little scene of tits, you know, And I don't. And by the way, we can get dick in the mix too. I just want it all back. Yeah. Too much. Just women. And then it was like, you know, and then they were like kind of showing dick like. Like as a political statement. Like, we're not misogynist.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And now it's just gone to like this sanitized. Like this sanitized. Like every action movies, you know, a comic book movie. Everything has to be for kids. Everything has to be like, oh, we also need to sell it to China. Like it has to be so. So like appeal to everyone.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Where they won't just show fat knockers in between kills fat knockers. And that takes a movie to the next level. Same thing with fat cock. Throw a out there. Absolutely. But why do we have. Why is it only an art house movie where you see Cop?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why can't be in a John Wick 6. You know what I mean? Why can't we see John Wick's dick? Maybe not. You know, Keanu's. He's an accomplished man at this point, but a younger guy. Like the way every hot actress has to show her tits pretty much like right away. Let's make Paul Mescal show his. You know what I mean, Barry, what's his face did it salute to him? Let's get more out there. And let's also keep the tits rolling.

[Steph Tolev]

Well, let's keep him out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

I love the way I hear you say fat knockers after I just watched you eat a hot dog for breakfast. It's just very.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a. It's a chicken sausage with a paleo bun. The macros are very good.

[Steph Tolev]

I just.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's meant to look like a hot dog to trick your brain.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay, but I'm just saying a hot dog for breakfast is what I'm My point here.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's noonish. 11:30. The life of a small business owner Podcast the owner, I guess, of a podcast studio and small entertainment company, Stavie Baby Enterprises. It's chaos, you know, sometimes you hire your dumb friends at every position and what that means is they're not really good at what they are hired to do, but you don't feel like looking for somebody qualified, so you just keep pushing. And that's how life is. And that's, you know, maybe you're not a podcaster, maybe you're in charge of order fulfillment for an e commerce business. And you know, that's its own special kind of chaos. But with Shipstation, you can count on your day to day remaining calm. Save hours and money every month by shipping from all your stores with one login. Automating repetitive tasks and finding the best rates among all the global carriers. It's so easy to automate. Even your dumb friends that you hire could run your store with Shipstation. Lead your business into this future with smart features and automations that boost efficiency and save time. It's the fastest, most affordable way to ship products to your customers. With discounts up to 88% off UPS, DHL Express and UPS rates and up to 90% off FedEx rates. Calm the chaos of order fulfillment with the shipping software that delivers. Switch to ship station today. Go to shipstation.comstavi to sign up for your free trial. That shipstation.comstavi Wait, would you show your.

[Steph Tolev]

Dick in a movie?

[Stavros Halkias]

My dick's too small to show. Okay, but maybe at a point.

[Steph Tolev]

Wow, thank you for your honesty.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah. Like if my dick was bigger, don't you think it'd be like I'm naked? Fully. Like I've, I've been nude pretty much in every other way.

[Steph Tolev]

King Fluffin.

[Stavros Halkias]

Even the flow is so small. It's just.

[Steph Tolev]

What are we talking about? How small?

[Stavros Halkias]

Soft?

[Steph Tolev]

No, hard.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hard. It's a regular dick hard. But it looks bad small.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay, well, yeah, most look bad when they soft.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's what I'm saying. It's like it's. I have to. You know, you want to. You want to show a nice dick.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, I can fluff it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I can fluff it to the point where it's like, it's like that, that breaking point. Like when water's outside, it's just about to turn into ice. You can get it right before it's a boner. You know what I mean? Like when it's like as long as it's going to be but. But it hasn't like. Yes, okay, maybe with the right lighting.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

If I lose a couple pounds. If we have, like. Like if we tape back all my. Around the dick fat to kind of really push it and show every. Maybe I would consider.

[Steph Tolev]

If you lost that. Yeah, okay. If you lost.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you lost the gunt.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Then maybe I should dick. And then I say that. And you know what? I do want to get to the point where I'll show even my little ass dick, because that's the final. I've said this before. That's the final. Like, that's the final mountain to climb over. Body positivity. Right? Because, like, everyone finds beauty even in, like. Like, fat women are treated bad by society. But there are people who find beauty and they really like that. Whatever.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. But those people keep it that to themselves.

[Stavros Halkias]

And we're. And we're. And listen, you can put a model up there, but, like. And I think. I think people will. Will grow to accept beauty in all its forms a little eventually. I think we're kind of. We're at least sort of like, there's definitely a backlash.

[Steph Tolev]

You want to read the. The comments I got this morning about being a fat trans. It's not going away.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not going away.

[Steph Tolev]

It's not going. No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

I. I'm just saying there is a. I can see a world where like. Like right now, these people, like, we kind of, like, over. Maybe you could argue overcorrected. And then these people feel like they want to attack something, so they're like, why are fat girls models or whatever? Right. I just don't see any scenario where a little dick is put on display and anyone goes, good for you. Even the other little dick wouldn't stand up because they don't want to say, at least other fat women. When it's like, a fat model will be like, good for you. No little dick guy is gonna be like, me. Cause it's like no one knows your dick is small. And then you would. So I'm not saying it's easy. Don't get me wrong.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm just saying the tr. The final hurdle is to accept even little ass dicks as, like, aesthetic beauty. You know, to accept that. So.

[Steph Tolev]

But all these statues, they all have, like, the peepees back in the day.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's true.

[Steph Tolev]

You mean. And we all idolize them.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, ancient Greece, I mean, that's. That's when society was run, right?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah. Little pees were taking over.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, they say that, like, it was. They looked at a little dick was a sign of, like, being classy really? You were thought to be a brute if you had a big ass dick.

[Steph Tolev]

Well, There you go, Mr. Class over here. Mr. Fucking Class.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm in finishing school right now. I'm getting ready for a cotillion. But yes, definitely things shift. But so I guess just a final answer your question. Yes, I will show my little dick some at some point because it's for the. For the cause.

[Steph Tolev]

For the cause.

[Stavros Halkias]

Us. For the little dick. For the little that will come after me.

[Steph Tolev]

I think it would help. Did you see that one video where there's all those like micro penis guys met up? It was like a talk show years ago.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, the Howard. Howard Stern had like guys with their little ass dicks was how certain.

[Steph Tolev]

I thought it was like a talk show in like Britain and they were all were like talking about. They were like crying and then. Oh, I feel like the comments on that video were.

[Stavros Halkias]

No. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Nobody was supporting that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, exactly. Well, micro is a whole nother level.

[Steph Tolev]

Micro is different.

[Stavros Halkias]

Micro's like, you know, that's just a very. A debilit like, you know, Alex said.

[Steph Tolev]

This once and I, I think he's true. He says that he's like, I don't think micro people penises should have to pay taxes. And I think he's right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I agree with that.

[Steph Tolev]

You can't. That's like, that's like when people get mad at my nose. I'm like, I can't help this. You can't. I'm not. I. I was with a micro once.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow. Really?

[Steph Tolev]

That's the best acting I've ever done. I should have been nominated for a globe acting. Like I felt that inside me as a. Like.

[Stavros Halkias]

No way.

[Steph Tolev]

No, I swear to God, I am not that nub.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow.

[Steph Tolev]

Cuz I kept trying to jerk it off and he's like, no, it's good. I'm like, I'll let me in there. And then like I had like just one little slat open in my blinds and the light shone in and I was like, it was like a horror movie. Just this little tiny. It looked like a little like, you know, you know when you get corn and you two little corn things that you stick at the end? That little corn thing. Little corn things that you stick in the end. Yeah, but like soft.

[Stavros Halkias]

See if your dick is that small, you. You have to almost be like, I don't effectively have a dick.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. I.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right. I'm going to. We're going to have a form of like closer to lesbian sex where you just have to kind of lick My little ass dick. You know what I mean? Like. Yeah. Humping, eating, pussy, finger popping, all that kind of stuff. Which I'm not, I myself am not unfamiliar with that because again though not micro like I said nothing to. And it's like my dick's not getting hard every time either. So that's a tough one.

[Steph Tolev]

Why, what's going on down there?

[Stavros Halkias]

A lot of unhealthiness.

[Steph Tolev]

It's the breakfast hot dog.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what's hilarious? The breakfast hot dog era. The last month has been one of the healthier months of my life.

[Steph Tolev]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Compared to like what was going on before. I mean we're talking eating like you know, taking, you know, getting up.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Being fat as plus high, plus drunk.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. Plus the two ring you're slopping around.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. There's no, that's not a formula for.

[Steph Tolev]

No.

[Stavros Halkias]

For the hardest, the hardest prick of all time.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. I wonder. I guess maybe I never thought about that. I'm like. I guess if I was like eating like that too. You probably wouldn't. It's always wet down there. Cuz it's, I might be sick. Like no ladies just always wet. They're like no. I'm like, oh, it's a hole. It's an organ. It's an open hole. It's part of my body.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I, I, I do envy that of like, you know, at the end of the day, I don't do anything. It's still there.

[Steph Tolev]

It's still there.

[Stavros Halkias]

You can figure something out.

[Steph Tolev]

I tell people I gotta make. My boyfriend likes it and he's real. Like I say that we were like one somebody one time thought it was a hired actor. I swear to God. My boyfriend because he's hot. So they're like yo bro, who's that guy?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And I'm like he's, he's, he's Shooter McGavin's nephew.

[Stavros Halkias]

Whoa.

[Steph Tolev]

He looks exactly like Shooter McGavin. So people never believe that he's real. Yes. Yes. Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's awesome. Does he ever like like putt like a dildo into your.

[Steph Tolev]

No. But he should. That I could lie there and he could get a hole in one. It could just my could just plop right in. I could probably make the whole. The ball disappear. See you later. Fun magic trick.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's, that is hilarious that they're just like mad that you could date an attractive guy.

[Steph Tolev]

They're, they're pissed. Any man on the Internet. I don't. Every man on the Internet hates me.

[Stavros Halkias]

They just want you to not have.

[Steph Tolev]

Happiness they think they don't. And they think they hate. They just hate. Cuz I yell at men a lot in my like.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right, right, right. And you should know your place.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, I should know my place. Feels pretty good. So I don't give a.

[Stavros Halkias]

How did you guys meet?

[Steph Tolev]

At a show.

[Stavros Halkias]

There you go.

[Steph Tolev]

He came in with his uncle, the Laugh Factory.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, look at that.

[Steph Tolev]

A year and a half ago. And everyone was bombing. And then I saw Shooter McGava. I'm like, why is Shooter McGavin at the Laugh Factory in front of 12 people? Yeah. I was like, holy. And then I went up and I was like, really, really bringing it. Like if you had like a celebrity in the crowd and.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Well, we're not doing crowd work tonight.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're doing the A stuff. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And then I went up. I went up like a batt. And then we kind of start talking on stage and then.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, from stage.

[Steph Tolev]

I asked. I asked dick pick question. I'm like, who's taking any? Nobody answered me. And then he yells out. I'm like, shoot him again, son. I didn't know he was he talking before. And then I went over after and I fangirl, because I'm a psycho. I'm like, hello, Sorry, Shooter. Because Happy G movies, of course, shook his hand and then.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he's. It feels like he's fallen on some hard times. He probably enjoyed getting fandom.

[Steph Tolev]

He loved it. He was also blackout drunk.

[Stavros Halkias]

So he was just like, what? In fact, when he got a DUI, I believe he mentioned being Shooter McGavin.

[Steph Tolev]

Probably. Yes, probably. You think that would help?

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't think it did. I think he ultimately. Well, who knows? He only got caught for the one, so it might have helped in the past.

[Steph Tolev]

And he's doing fine now.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's doing good now. We got Happy Gilmore too, on the way.

[Steph Tolev]

He's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

He was in a couple. He was in something else.

[Steph Tolev]

He was killing.

[Stavros Halkias]

He was great in Hacks. He was great hacks.

[Steph Tolev]

Did you watch Hacks?

[Stavros Halkias]

Hello?

[Steph Tolev]

I was in Hacks. Excuse me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was great. Meg Stalter. Jeez. Who else?

[Steph Tolev]

I had a small role. Please praise me. My God. This is all I have.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's awesome. Oh, truly. Yeah, that's. That's real. How male comics get hot girlfriends. Respect to you. You are. You are a pioneer of.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm a pioneer.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're the bulina of. Of getting hotter.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm bulina. I am her. I'm going to go Google.

[Stavros Halkias]

She was the first admiral, the first female Admiral. And maybe any navy, I believe.

[Steph Tolev]

But I love this.

[Stavros Halkias]

So there you go.

[Steph Tolev]

I need to see. I need to see what I am.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, that's so funny.

[Steph Tolev]

That actually is me. Holy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God. I hadn't seen a picture.

[Steph Tolev]

Forever mine. That's actually me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Holy.

[Steph Tolev]

Holy fuck. That's my exact nose. That's fucking crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Don't you dare pull up some Albanian propaganda that says she's Albanian. No. Get out. No. Go to her. Wikipedia. See, even technologies against you for those listening at home elders tried to pull up some virus ridden. It literally crashed our computer because you tried to find an article. The heroine of the war of 1821 was Albanian. You piece of. Check device. Great. Now we lost. Now we lost the episode. Episode. No, we didn't. We're good. We lost the episode because eldest start.

[Steph Tolev]

Say everything the exact same way.

[Stavros Halkias]

God damn it. You idiot. Was that worth it, man? Ooh, folks, it's tank top weather. It's getting warm outside. Summertime, Hawaiians, short shorts, bikinis. You know what that means. It's twisted tea weather, baby. You know, we're big twisted tea guys on this program, and nothing hits the spot on a nice warm day. Maybe you're on a little patio, Maybe you're in a backyard. Maybe you're in a dark room alone. It doesn't matter. The important thing is Twisted Tea is a refreshing hard iced tea made with real brewed tea and 5% alcohol. It tastes like real iced tea because it is realized tea. It's brewed with it and it's got a little kick. 5% per volume. Perfect. Goes down smooth. No carbonation makes it easy to drink all day long. I hate when carbonation gets in the way of me drinking. That's not a problem with twisted tea. Remember, folks, when it comes to twisted tea, you want. You're gonna wanna keep it twisted. So grab a refreshing twisted tea today and remember, keep it twisted.

[Steph Tolev]

You know who people have been calling me recently, which is almost more offensive than Nosferatu? The guy that dresses up like a woman in mash.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, wow.

[Steph Tolev]

What's his name?

[Stavros Halkias]

Not Hawkeye, is it?

[Steph Tolev]

No, it's what's his fucking name? You're gonna find it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't remember.

[Steph Tolev]

This has been my neutral.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's panicking now, making sure he's not. He hasn't lost the episode.

[Steph Tolev]

Whatever that guy's name is. That's my new. That's the new troll.

[Stavros Halkias]

I know what he looks like. Yeah, that's kind of a throwback.

[Steph Tolev]

It is. I was like, really? We're gonna do that also. I don't hate it because it's more original than it is or I get the guy. Despicable me. That guy is the main one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Gru. Gruff. Sure.

[Steph Tolev]

That one.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's all nose based, though.

[Steph Tolev]

That's all nose based. I lost 35 pounds.

[Stavros Halkias]

30. Nice. Were you trying to. You were just, like. Was there a moment where you were, like, up for the special?

[Steph Tolev]

Because I, I. This is so sick. I didn't. I was like, I know I'm gonna be trolled, because that's what happens.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Steph Tolev]

I, I didn't want to be called. I know. It's gonna be called ugly, unfunny, and trans. I still want fat to be part of it. Let's just get fat out of it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Let's control what we can control.

[Steph Tolev]

Let's control what more than one thing. And it works. So I lost 35 pounds, and it's hard to keep it off.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nice. Congrats. What you do?

[Steph Tolev]

I did Sydney, the trainer that Bloo and George Ensign use.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

She's out here in New York. She's magic. Yeah, she's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wait, but you. You weren't here? You just met with her or what? Yeah, we.

[Steph Tolev]

I said over online on Zoom. Yeah. Yeah. No, not even Zoom.

[Stavros Halkias]

I just.

[Steph Tolev]

She just, like, sent me a. Her fitness plan.

[Stavros Halkias]

Cool.

[Steph Tolev]

And check in and stuff. Stuff. I know. Palufa. Oh, Pluto's Jack.

[Stavros Halkias]

Bloof Jack. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

She's, like, chiseled.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I actually wanted to have both of them on and just talk because we. We almost had them on at one point together. And then whatever, scheduling didn't work, but then she got jacked. That's a whole. That's a whole nother fun discussion.

[Steph Tolev]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Getting jacked in, like, you know, 30s.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hilarious.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, yeah, yeah. It's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I respect that. I would love to. I would. I mean, she's, like, in insane shape. I just want to have. Have big arms.

[Steph Tolev]

That's it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't want to be.

[Steph Tolev]

Stop arms. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't want to be, like, in good shape.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm not doing abs. Abs is too much. The amount of work to get an ab, I can't dedicate that.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think that's mostly not eating.

[Steph Tolev]

It's. It's a lot of not eating. It's also no drinking. And I. Baby likes to say. Oh, baby's having a couple cocktails today. I'll tell you.

[Stavros Halkias]

What was the first. What was the first time you got drunk in. In Toronto or as a Youth.

[Steph Tolev]

As a youth, I used to see my parents smearing off ices all the time.

[Stavros Halkias]

Love that.

[Steph Tolev]

But there's one party member. I think it was grade nine. I got a bottle of this lemon rum cardi. Lemon.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay, nice.

[Steph Tolev]

And I barfed everywhere. I passed out on my friend's dildo and woke up and I was like, my back. And I was like, also, who's using a dildo in grade nine?

[Stavros Halkias]

That's crazy. A ninth grader with a dildo. And we're not talking vibrator, we're talking dildo.

[Steph Tolev]

It was, it was a vibrator dildo, but it was like the long, like those long white ones. And I was like, what?

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, wow.

[Steph Tolev]

I didn't know I had a hole down there until I was, I don't know, grade 12.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Very Canadian. 12th grade.

[Stavros Halkias]

You figured it out.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. Because I didn't wear a tampon. I didn't know there's a hole. I'm like shoving that up you in ninth grade. It's crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, that's, that is, that is early. Pretty advanced. Ninth grade is what, 12, 13, 14, maybe 14, 15. Okay.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, no, I think so.

[Stavros Halkias]

To get the tools out at that age.

[Steph Tolev]

Tools out, like, that's advanced to be getting respect blown a smithereen. That's early.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's that friend up to these days? How's her life turned out?

[Steph Tolev]

I don't know. She lived actually beside the house that they filmed.

[Stavros Halkias]

So she was a new to. So she must have been pretty in touch with her.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, yeah. She showed me how to put a table in.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow.

[Steph Tolev]

She came in the bathroom today, she took her leg and I was like, what? She's like. I was like, that's a vagina. Like, you don't see your friends pussy holes at that age. A lot to take in. It was. Yeah, she was very advanced.

[Stavros Halkias]

So she was basically your, like your sex ed teacher.

[Steph Tolev]

She walked away naked all the time. And I was like, what is this?

[Stavros Halkias]

This, this is fascinating. We were parents. Like that.

[Steph Tolev]

No. Very nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

They were buttoned up. Nice.

[Steph Tolev]

They have nice white. They had a yacht. They were never home. They were never home. Her parents weren't there. Bizarre. I, I, I worked the girl whose whole family were nudist, and I was like, no, your dad's a pervert.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Can you imagine with the puberty and just you're walking around with your tits in your dad's face.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, that's, that's nuts.

[Steph Tolev]

That's crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I will say some of those people really just are naked. Like it is. I know what you mean. And I think that way too because, you know, I can't fathom, like, it's just so weird to be new. Like having nudeness not connected to some form of sexuality is weird to me. But you know, some of these people, like we had.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes. If you're growing up with it too. If you're growing up and you're always naked, you're just not seeing it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, exactly. It is weird. Don't get me wrong. I hear that and that's bizarre. But then I'm like, I mean, if he actually believes in nudity as like being like the way then it, if he accepts it, then it would be weirder for him to be like, well, we have to be naked, but my 14 year old daughter can't be.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean? That would be like. Yeah, you know what I mean? Because you'd be like, put your clothes on. I. I don't want to see that. You know what I mean? Like you're. You know what I mean? He almost has to be. And so. So we've just absolved him of being a. I guess. How are we looking? You think we're gonna get the screen back or is that done?

[Steph Tolev]

I got, I got flash. I got flash Me your puss after the AVN Awards.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow.

[Steph Tolev]

She's like, that was great. Check this out. I was like, whoa. So you would love that.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would have.

[Steph Tolev]

You love.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, I think I would have had a pretty good time at the awards.

[Steph Tolev]

I. I honestly can't stress enough how supportive these people were.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, they're the best.

[Steph Tolev]

It was.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, that's the crazy. Like people being mean to these people is. They are the nicest. Truly, I am the most pro ho person on earth. Earth.

[Steph Tolev]

I've never felt funnier in my life.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

The amount of people that photos with me, I was like, what? Like after. And they all, they all were so hot and so supportive. Would anyone would win. They'd all go crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Some of the awards were hilarious.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Best like anal. Best triple anal penetration for a Latina newcomer.

[Steph Tolev]

Wow. You looked.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I do my research. My guest hosts the AVN Awards. I'm gonna check some stuff out. Yeah, I'm doing. I've been preparing for this podcast for some would say 20 years.

[Steph Tolev]

20 years. I want to talk about how we can't fully talk about it, but we can kind of say yeah because Netflix posted it. So I think I'm allowed to say.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're allowed to say it.

[Steph Tolev]

I was in. I'M in this season of Tires.

[Stavros Halkias]

You are in the season of Tires. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You were great to act with you.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were great. You were really good. You were hilarious. A very funny role.

[Steph Tolev]

Very funny role.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Really funny role. Yeah. This season, too. And it was so funny because, you know, when some of these things go around, like, the role goes around or the audition goes around and, you know, a lot of. A lot of female comics basically read.

[Steph Tolev]

For the role every single.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I had a lot of. I had a lot of. I had a lot of people, like, texting me, like. And it's like. Like I have any power.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, I don't just show up and do what I'm told. It's like, it's not my show. I just. But I heard from everybody and then. And then it was like, very quickly, I think, like, someone found out that you got it and they're like, oh, yeah. No one was even mad because you were perfect. Yeah, you really were perfect. You were perfect for this role.

[Steph Tolev]

It was the one time because I. All my friends in LA read for it, and then I said, I got it. They're like, oh, why did I even read for it?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

No offense. I'll be rude to anybody. This role was built for me. I pretty much played myself.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were awesome. Yeah. That's how we like to do things on tires. No one really knows how to act. We just kind of play ourselves.

[Steph Tolev]

It was. I will say, like, I've done a few things now. It was. I've never felt so funny in my life. That I did in a set.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Grip Guy came over, shook my hand.

[Stavros Halkias]

Those guys are awesome.

[Steph Tolev]

It was nuts.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tires rule.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, it was so chill. The costume people, the makeup people.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no.

[Steph Tolev]

Everyone was amazing. I'm like, how is everyone this cool?

[Stavros Halkias]

The whole crew is cool. I think part of that is, like, filming in Philly, right? Or, like, around in Pennsylvania. So it's like, some of these people work on, like, you know, I mean, there is some production around there, so it's like they're just a little happier to not be worried. You know, they're. They work, but it's like, not that much cool comes around. Like, they'll also have to, like, travel a little bit more. Like, whatever's going on. So, like, for them to. They're kind of at home, they're hanging out, work. They're like. The makeup people were all like, it's crazy how much easier you guys are to deal with. And, like, none of us fucking give a fuck.

[Steph Tolev]

Well, and you're all. It's all men.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. We're all comedians who are like, we are going to look like none of us expect to look good on tv. We're all like, well, of course we're going to look like shit. We're. We all look like shit. Shane is hungover. He's about to do like a fudgeing five. A five page speech. And he's like, he doesn't expect to be fucking. You know, I, I was just like, yeah, do it. Yeah. Oh, what, are you going to make my hair look good? Like, just fucking give me a little run through and we're good to go.

[Steph Tolev]

Put a little cover on.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, it's the best that, that show. That show rules. And I think I really do. I have very high hopes for season two. It was so fun to shoot. We actually did it like a, like a real show. Whereas the first season was just like kind of. Because, yeah, it was just like. I thought, I've said this before. I thought it was going on YouTube. Like, I thought. I thought it was like the best YouTube video ever made.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, my God.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it just turned out to be like a pretty shittily made but funny show. And now it's like, it looks. I mean, season two looks great.

[Steph Tolev]

He's such a good director too.

[Stavros Halkias]

McKeever's. So he's such a.

[Steph Tolev]

Because there's ways to direct people where you can feel like I could tell when I did something wrong or odd and like it. And the way he would word it, like. Because everyone can hear the director talking to you. Yeah, but why don't you try it like this way?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And I'm like, oh, okay. So in his head he's like, I hate that first take. But I was like, oh, I still feel good about that take. And like, yeah, it was.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you respect, like working with sir. I mean, a director, you just have to kind of like respect with their. What they're like. McIver does so much work for that show where it's like he, he got. I mean on the first season in particular, he like edited everything and now even now he oversees everything, obviously because he's a director. But like a lot of it is. Is in his head where it's like if that like he has such a clear vision for it and he's really funny.

[Steph Tolev]

Really funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's made so much good stuff and he obviously works so great with like, you know, with Shane. They have so much. They have such a good history together. But yeah, he's. He's the man. And Everybody on it is funny.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, it was. It's very.

[Stavros Halkias]

We got very. Yeah, we got like. I'm so happy to just have stumbled into a really good show. Like, thank God. Yeah, thank God. They just needed, you know, people that are exactly how both of us behave.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. You know, like, my favorite roles are literally when I just. I don't think I've ever not played myself now.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

I can build verse old dads. I played that pervert on the balcony. I was just this disgusting scumbag. I ate three full breakfast burritos. I was so sick. I went home. I had sentinel poisoning.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was so, so funny. Yeah. I mean, in the first season, I was eating something every, Every, every scene, and I just. They're like, swallow it. A lot of it. Yeah, I've just ate a couple hoagies. Yeah, it didn't even. This season. There's like a scene where I'm eating. It's hilarious. They're like. There's a scene where I have, like. Like, I have to have, like, a weird up lunch, and they gave me a couple, you know, like, some anchovies. Some, like, weird. It was like a weird, you know, assemblage of. And I was like, you know, I think Dave would also be eating chicken tenders and fries. And I just.

[Steph Tolev]

I just.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's, like, a Wendy's theater where we shoot. I was like, yeah, why don't you go over and grab some nuggets for Dave? I just ate a full Wendy's meal with whatever the. And, yeah, I just ate all of it.

[Steph Tolev]

It is so funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think that's why it's fun. It's like, none of us are actually.

[Steph Tolev]

I mean, we're actors, I guess, but double cheeseburger and.

[Stavros Halkias]

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[Steph Tolev]

I ate these wings once in this Pepsi commercial, and they didn't tell us they weren't fully cooked. I was so ill. Oh, my. It was non union. And I got paid 500. Who doesn't cook the way?

[Stavros Halkias]

Why would they not cook?

[Steph Tolev]

Because they were so wanting to see that. The sauce on them. So they just kept putting sauce and I was like, okay. So I kept, like, biting. Okay, bite it again, but this time make it look like real.

[Stavros Halkias]

So they were telling you to bite it. Then it wasn't cooked.

[Steph Tolev]

I. I ate a piece of like. Oh, that was kind of soft. And I ate. Oh, it was. No, it was bad. I was so ill. And. And it's the worst commercial. All I do, it's me bowling. I put my fingers in a bowling ball and then I eat a chicken wing. Like, my fingers. It was so I'm like, this is funny. It's stupid.

[Stavros Halkias]

You got paid 500.

[Steph Tolev]

500, non union. 500 bucks to get food poisoning so bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Believe me, I'm a man who's no. Who's no stranger. To food poisoning from chicken wings. I have gotten it multiple times.

[Steph Tolev]

Wings need to be. You need.

[Stavros Halkias]

You got to fry them hard. As at this point in my, you know, the age that I am, the. This is. Some of the wisdom I've acquired is that you got to get your wings hard fried.

[Steph Tolev]

How old are you?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm 35.

[Steph Tolev]

My God, you're a young little.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm just a little boy.

[Steph Tolev]

You're a little cherub baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Little chair baby boy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Many say I look even younger than 35. Wait, how old are you?

[Steph Tolev]

I'm 39.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Steph Tolev]

I turned 40 in Nice two weeks.

[Stavros Halkias]

Weeks.

[Steph Tolev]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

You gonna do something special? What are you doing?

[Steph Tolev]

I'm in Toronto. I'm doing Adam Ray's.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, cool.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. Yep, yep, yep. And then I'm doing, like, a sketch show. My old sketch partner.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are you, like, do you have any sense of dread for turning 40? A lot of people look at, you know, milestone birthdays.

[Steph Tolev]

No. I feel. I'm so scared of dying.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, I don't want to die. Let's get into that. Terrified. I cry every night. Don't love that. But I feel so.

[Stavros Halkias]

You have an ever present fear of death.

[Steph Tolev]

Every single night. I wake up at least once and I think about it and I cry for five minutes. I go back to bed. It's so demented.

[Stavros Halkias]

What the.

[Steph Tolev]

No. Since I was a kid.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really?

[Steph Tolev]

Since I was, like a. My first. Earliest memories were me, like, three or four. My parents coming in, checking on me and being, what's wrong? Like, I don't want to die. And they're like, oh, like, what do you say? I'm sorry, honey, you're gonna die.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. It's a lot. Yeah. When you're. When a kid's little, it's like, that's a long, long time.

[Steph Tolev]

And now, like, it's getting pretty close.

[Stavros Halkias]

Now it's like, you know. Yeah. Now it's within the.

[Steph Tolev]

You know, it's within the sphere.

[Stavros Halkias]

You can do this.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, I can see it.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you had a. You know, it's looking pretty clear. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. Bubblina, probably.

[Stavros Halkias]

She definitely did. Since you were a kid.

[Steph Tolev]

Really psycho. Yeah. It's very invasive, and it takes over my head. And I've tried. I've tried therapy about it. It does not.

[Stavros Halkias]

Doesn't work.

[Steph Tolev]

No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

Was there, like. Did somebody die when you were really young?

[Steph Tolev]

No. It makes no sense.

[Stavros Halkias]

How did you. How were you, like, the concept of that. Do you have any idea of how you first thought of it?

[Steph Tolev]

No. I don't know. It might have been a movie. It's got to be something had to be a weird. And then it just sounds like the worst movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

All Dogs Go to Heaven maybe did it to you.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, my God.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a up movie.

[Steph Tolev]

How dare that movie have been shown. Yeah, you.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's crazy. I mean, I want to watch. It's been a while since I've seen it, but I remember being a kid and be like, what the.

[Steph Tolev]

You know what really me up? Kids, Kids with the guy. The guy perfectly people to give them aids.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, okay. I thought we were still talking about children's music.

[Steph Tolev]

No, no, that was.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jesus Christ. I think I know why you're scared.

[Steph Tolev]

Of life and dying and all dogs of age.

[Stavros Halkias]

God damn, that's wild. So you'll just freak the out.

[Steph Tolev]

I freak out. I can't discuss it because I get too into it and that's it. Yeah, but I'm happy. I am. I'm like. Like my career is going and once my special comes out, which is going to be on a major network that I can't say yet, but once that comes out, I think that'll help and.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it won't help. It won't help you not think about that.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, no, I'm gonna think about it more. God, I want to think about it more. But, you know, I'm happy now. I love my dog. I love my boyfriend.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because, like, look, I don't want to die.

[Steph Tolev]

Nobody wants to die. Well, some people do.

[Stavros Halkias]

I've definitely. I've definitely, definitely thought. There's definitely been like, parts of, like the last tour when I was getting that. You know, when I'm getting so up where I'm like, I'm a wildly obese comedian who just took a bunch of pills. I could just not wake up. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I was like, I would just go to bed being like, you know, it's on. It's on the table. I don't wake up. Like, I had that thought, but it wasn't like, I'm scared of death. It was just like. Like I have put myself in the position where I could die, not like I'm scared of death overall. So it's just fascinating that you've had just because you're not scared of actual. Like, we had two different. We have two different phobias where mine is. I'm so unhealthy that you think that I literally could die. Right. And I. And yours is just like, death is always around the corner.

[Steph Tolev]

It's exist because it's Always like, I don't think it's gonna be, like a freak accident. I just. The idea of getting, like, older and just dying is like. It's so bad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it's interesting.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, all this for what?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, there's. There's no for what. It's just all that. It's like to have a good time. And then you say that getting old and dying, whatever. But it's like, I don't know, like, I used to be a little more. And then I see my grandmother and it's like, you care. She had a nice. She had a nice run of things.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's okay. She's not freaking out. Yeah. She's 94, 92, something like that. That after 90, it's like, you know.

[Steph Tolev]

My great grandfather to 104 Bulgarian ate garlic and yogurt.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow. There you go.

[Steph Tolev]

Saw you scarf some yogurt before, toss some garlic cloves in there, and you're going to be.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not a bad idea. Not a bad idea. Yeah. I don't know. I just feel like. Yeah. Whatever life is. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Let's not talk about anymore. I'm being depressed.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's fascinating. No, no, no. I'm just. It's just funny to think. I mean, I don't know. I think old age is. That ain't the one I'm worried about. That seems nice.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, I kind of. But I know you mean nothing. Just sit around and just watch daytime tv. Just. Just sitting there eating.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

I want to get.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I'm kind of excited. And then it's like, you know, you should be able to have a suicide pod if you were like, all right, I've gotten so fat, I'm gonna have a heart attack. Let me get in this suicide pod.

[Steph Tolev]

That'd be nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, have some hot cocoa, go out.

[C]

It's never too late to give up.

[Steph Tolev]

That's nice. That's reassuring.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You guys both plan on wearing Bucky's T shirts today?

[Stavros Halkias]

We didn't plan on it, no.

[Steph Tolev]

What the hell?

[Stavros Halkias]

I had no idea he was doing it. And it was just the first. Here's how I get dressed for this podcast. The first clothes that are within my grasp. In my bedroom, I typically put them.

[Steph Tolev]

I was going to say soiled sweatpants, Bucky.

[Stavros Halkias]

I thought they were clean, but no, they look gray.

[Steph Tolev]

Sweatpants to me are always soiled. There's. There's probably a jiz stain in there for sure. Or PE drip. Why do men wear gray? Gray. You all have P drips in your Underwear. I don't know what you're doing. Start wearing black.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wear black most of the time. I don't know. Well, that's what's interesting is that, like, I. I don't have gray. What's that?

[Steph Tolev]

You got smears in your undies?

[Stavros Halkias]

I would assume so.

[Steph Tolev]

You mean you assume you don't look?

[Stavros Halkias]

Not really.

[Steph Tolev]

You've never glanced at your stain? I myself, the day before on stage.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really?

[Steph Tolev]

I had diarrhea and I ran to the bathroom. I went to the wrong change room and I sharted. And then I take off my underwear and I was scrubbing. Pavi was there and he's like, what's going on? They're like, leave me alone. That. And he's like, what the. I'm like scrubbing my underwear and there's no pa. No. No air dryer. So I had to get paper towel and I was like, bringing up my crotch. Disgusting. And then I went on and I talked about. On stage, everyone's like this. I'm like, well, what do you offer me? Why you at my show? Why are you at my show? That was all the time. Sorry. No one shars. I'm 40. I'm sharting.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, I will. I've had a couple very recent close calls.

[Steph Tolev]

Shard. There's no looking. No offense. Looking at you. Breakfast.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would tell you if I started. I wouldn't lie to you. I just. It's just bit. I. I just said I've had a couple close calls where I. Maybe there's more ass real estate to trap the.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, where it's like, maybe I've the inside of my ass cheeks. And it didn't. And it didn't get all the way. That's not. Not as Harry's eldest, for example, but, you know.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Have you ever waxed the hole?

[C]

No, I kind of. I've. I kind of have wanted to try like maybe shaving it or something.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, go get it. Go get it. Wax. No, I'm telling you now it will. It's gonna change your. Your life. More men need to get their ass waxed.

[Stavros Halkias]

Please wax your ass.

[Steph Tolev]

Does not feel. It doesn't. It doesn't hurt that much. Cuz you've been wiping your ass your whole life, so it's like raw back there. Once you get it done, you're going to. Your life's going to. Your farts are going to be different.

[Stavros Halkias]

And. Wow.

[C]

I bet it'd be a lot easier to, like, clean up after. That sounds awesome.

[Steph Tolev]

You don't have a bidet?

[Stavros Halkias]

I do, but it's a long story. Skeptic.

[C]

I used to be hardcore bidets. Basically. I got a UTI.

[Stavros Halkias]

From the.

[C]

From the bidet.

[Steph Tolev]

There's no way.

[Stavros Halkias]

Way, no chance.

[Steph Tolev]

Makes no sense. Why is your. You're putting your pee hole in the bidet.

[C]

I'm not, but I was using a toilet seat once. I felt too small for my ass and I feel like.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then who's the real culprit? Your huge ass or the bidet? You know?

[C]

Well, still, I mean, you think the bidet would be designed. I don't know. I think the CTI was caused by.

[Stavros Halkias]

Drippings from the bay your up.

[C]

No, no, no, it was. It wasn't. It wasn't like sex related.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, then I think.

[C]

I think it was. I don't know. It was a crazy time. My just immune system in general was not that good.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were up against a lot, dude. You were weakened. You can't blame the bidet. You need a bigger toilet, better quality bidet. You're good to go.

[C]

I think, I think a better quality bidet too. This one was like a little messy, but I've used ones before that, like, it sprays just a little neater squarely.

[Stavros Halkias]

In your ass, right into your ass.

[C]

Like one of those carnival games, like.

[Stavros Halkias]

And they have the, the. My. You know, I. I'm a bidet. I'm a bidet guy, but ever since.

[C]

That, I've been afraid.

[Steph Tolev]

Do you also have the. The heated one?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, you can heat it.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, that's nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it's not bad.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, it's nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I, I really. You know, you can adjust the power of the squirt. You could adjust the direction of it. That's all important stuff.

[C]

I've just been a little scared. It's like, you know, I'll just wipe like normal for now, and if it gets too bad, it's time to shower. That's like. That's a philosophy.

[Steph Tolev]

Now I shower now almost after every. My boyfriend does it and I see him do it and then I feel gross if I don't.

[Stavros Halkias]

So now he does it every time.

[Steph Tolev]

Every time he. Or. And. Or he'll do this in public. He'll. He'll wet a thing. So if he's at the airport and he shits, he'll come out of the stall with his pants up, wet some toilet paper and go back in the stall.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why does he just travel with wet wipes?

[Steph Tolev]

I don't know. That's bizarre. Yeah, but I'll suck his Butt right now. Clean. Oh, I'd suck his ass. He doesn't. Never want me to, but it is very clean.

[Stavros Halkias]

Interesting.

[Steph Tolev]

I know. Nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I'm such a bidet guy that. That's actually one of my largest worries about the tour is that to be away from my bidet. Not the same thing.

[Steph Tolev]

I know, but it's just having little handheld back there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Little. Potentially, yeah. A little bottle.

[Steph Tolev]

Get one.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'll try it.

[C]

That's another reason I was, like, so reliant on the bidet that I was like, that's true. I can't. I can't. Like, this is a crutch. If I'm like, if I ever need a. In public, like, I can't.

[Stavros Halkias]

But sometimes we have to persevere, man. You know, you have to. There's times, in times of great adversity, you can really prove who you are. Eldis. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You didn't see how Bobalino was out there on the side of the ships.

[Stavros Halkias]

She was right off the dock, dude.

[Steph Tolev]

Dipping her ass in there afterwards, letting.

[Stavros Halkias]

The minnows clean her ass.

[Steph Tolev]

And she had a hairier ass than you, probably.

[Stavros Halkias]

Definitely. Folks, I'm not a bug guy. I don't want to see roly polies around. I don't want to see cockroaches. I grew up in poverty. My friend eldest over there, he grew up in poverty. As youths, I saw cockroaches at both our houses. If only our parents had had pesty. The do it yourself pest control. They give you the same products the pros use at a quarter of the cost. Their kit makes it so easy, it only takes a few minutes to apply. Other pest control Companies charge over $800 per year. But with pesti, you can get started at just 35 bucks per treatment with a customized plan based on your location, bugs, and climate. It just feels nice knowing my house is free. Will stay bug free for. It's summer, you know, I have some treats lying around. Maybe I fall asleep a little delicious lemonade. Maybe an ice cream cone melts. I don't want bugs eating my delicious treats. I don't want them swarming. It's easy, the peace of mind. I know that I have pesty. Keeping the pests controlled in my home. Oh, I sleep like a baby, I'll tell you that much. And you know I like all the gear. I'm a gearhead kit. The kit includes a reusable electronic sprayer. Feels cool. You feel like you're Dale gribble, a famous exterminator from media. I'M a big king of the hill guy. Guy comes with the electronics player, mixing bag, pesticide gloves, and instructions you can complete in less than 10 minutes. Now is the time to protect your home from bugs with pesty. Go to pesti.comstavi for an extra 10% off your order. That's P E S T I E.comstavi for an extra ten percent off. I am more interested in, like, were there, like, Bulgarians is such a specific little country. Like, were there that many? Because the fact there's even enough for a church is great. Because, like, eldest. He went to. You went to a Russian one. Right. There was like, there's Russian and there's Greek Orthodox churches. But so. And I feel like every. Every non. Greek person basically goes to. You basically choose whether you want to go Russian or Greek.

[Steph Tolev]

I think most of the Bulgarians would just go to the Greek one. But this was a specific, interesting one. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So were you around a lot of Bulgarians growing up or. No?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, a little bit. Because my. My dad. My. It's my dad's side. My dad's parents were an arranged marriage from Bulgaria.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow. Okay.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes. So my Deado came to Canada and then papa got a photo of him. She flew and met him. They had three kids. Divorced. He was psycho. My dad was like, crazy jealous. He'd, like, hide in the bushes and like, try to, like, threaten the mailman. I'm like, also, my Bubba wasn't that much of a looker, so. Yeah, yeah, she was like some bait. She's fine.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

No, she wasn't like, not enough to kill a man over. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Have to kill a federal employee.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. So they divorced.

[Stavros Halkias]

These are your grandparents.

[Steph Tolev]

My grandparents, yeah. The divorce was very rare in an arranged marriage. Divorce. So then that was it. My. My dado. And they didn't live together their whole lives. And then. Yeah, we had some. The Bulgarians are all. They're rude.

[Stavros Halkias]

So basically it was just your dad. So basically you're saying your dad comes from a weirdly broken.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Type of home. Bulgarian that like, maybe was shunned by the other Bulgarians.

[Steph Tolev]

So once my baba left the.

[Stavros Halkias]

The.

[Steph Tolev]

The. That side of the family didn't really talk to her.

[Stavros Halkias]

Gotcha.

[Steph Tolev]

So most of them were in Bulgaria and there was some here and then. Yeah, I remember we'd go my. My vu stuff and was so mean when I was a kid because I had this nose. I. I came out of nowhere. I had cute little buttons. And all of a sudden this happened. I think my Parents did something. They didn't tell me. I think somebody punched me. And they were like, you're fine. I'm like, no, but I remember, like, it was like Christmas, and we're watching TV, and my Vuju 7, ugliest man on the planet. Like, his nose was three of mine.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he goes, that's Uncle.

[Steph Tolev]

And he goes, why is your nose so big?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And I'm like, why have you had four strokes and you're still alive?

[Stavros Halkias]

I don.

[Steph Tolev]

I have no idea.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know.

[Steph Tolev]

This has happened. Yeah, they're mean. They're very. They're just like, always, like, oh, you gained weight. You're fatty now. I'm like, oh, okay. What the hell?

[Stavros Halkias]

Foreigners. I mean, Greek people like that. Albanians are like that.

[Steph Tolev]

There's no filter with these people.

[Stavros Halkias]

They will just say. They will just say it.

[Steph Tolev]

They'll say it. And then you're like, well, you look. Look in the mirror.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

No, I know my chicken over here.

[Stavros Halkias]

My uncle's the fattest man of all time, and he tells me I'm fat ever. And, like, not only is he fat as, but, like, when we go to visit it, he will take us on these elaborate meals, and then we'll eat. Eat what he gets. Or there were times I'm like, I'm actually not that hungry. They're like, what, you don't want to have five entrees with me? And then I call you fat, even though I've been. I haven't died. Even though I have the worst diabetes anyone and any doctor has ever seen in his life. Although I'm getting kind of worried. It's. You can only outrun that. You can only play that game so long.

[Steph Tolev]

But you. You look smaller in person, honestly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you. Yeah. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

No, at least this, last I saw you, you lost.

[Stavros Halkias]

I've lost a. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, yeah, because in the middle of tires, at the snacks, around a set, you.

[Steph Tolev]

You can't.

[Stavros Halkias]

Brutal.

[Steph Tolev]

You cannot. It's all nuts. It's all chips.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it's. I mean, there's, like, pastries. There's, like, snacks every three hours. And.

[Steph Tolev]

No, you got to stop with those. You got to have the fruit.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was doing real good. And then just tires and let's start a cult. The movie I did, I had to go from. I'd go on a promo run. So, like, whenever I had off from tires I had scheduled, because I was like, great, I'll work at tires, and then I'll have a couple weeks off to, like, get in the Zone. Because I take that whole year to kind of like exercise a little bit, like lose. And I'd lost 40 pounds going into tires and then Tires. Tires, the movie. Going right into Thanksgiving, cruising right into. And then I had like one healthy week in November and then, oh, here comes Christmas, you know what I mean? And so I gained 20 pounds back in the middle of tires.

[Steph Tolev]

And you're also not working out when you're on set. Yeah, there's no time.

[Stavros Halkias]

Although you know what? I shouldn't dox where the. We shoot, actually. But there was a gym near. Bleep out the gym. I said, there's a gym close by. There's a gym close by that I actually got to work. I actually kept my workouts in, but my diet. And obviously when you're this fat, it's.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, okay, you need to be working. It's really. It's insane the amount of working you have to do. Especially your 30s, you're totally. It's three hours.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I was just working out enough. Cuz like all of the year before I worked out, I did not work out. And what that did was irreparable damage to my body. Yeah. So like you're. I'm just at the age where it's like, if I hadn't kept up those three times a week workouts, I would just like. I had huge. I had insane back problems. I just like, you just start feeling.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, oh, you're fat.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not to be. It's not to improve yourself. It's to stave the reaper off.

[Steph Tolev]

You.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, that's all. That's all. So thank God I did that. But I g. I gained weight.

[Steph Tolev]

So.

[Stavros Halkias]

So. And then in January, I. I've been really hitting it.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

I've been hitting it to get ready for this in January, February, April, you know, God knows when this comes out. Whatever. You people, we're going on tour and we're. We want to make sure you have episodes. Suck my dick.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, well, people get pissed me backlog.

[Stavros Halkias]

They do, but they can also back.

[Steph Tolev]

What do you think we're doing?

[Stavros Halkias]

We want steps here, you know, we want to talk about tires, you guys. Yeah, you would have been singing a different tune if these episodes were shitty. And green room, it's me and Eldis with holding mics with one camera. You people.

[Steph Tolev]

No lighting, no statues.

[Stavros Halkias]

No. No charming. No charming stories of, you know, being a child haunted by death. Yeah, you wouldn't. You wouldn't have any of that with a button nose before. I'm so pissed.

[Steph Tolev]

I'LL send you guys a photo you can put up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, we'll have the you as a base baby. You now, Bulina. Just the like.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm Buina. I can't believe. I can't believe it.

[Stavros Halkias]

So what's your mom's side of the family?

[Steph Tolev]

Just like, Canadian.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah, normal Canadian. They're fine. Nothing, Nothing crazy over there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nothing special.

[Steph Tolev]

No, my family's normal. My mom's was. Well, she still is a highland dancing teacher. So I Highland dance my whole life. Highland dance, Scottish dancing with a kilt in the bank. My entire life. Yep. 3 to 18. Very bizarre. And a weird life. Yeah, that is strange. Every weekend I had no friends.

[Stavros Halkias]

So she was like of Scottish origin?

[Steph Tolev]

No, my grandma just saw someone doing it at a party once and liked it. My grandma was obsessed with Scotland and the queen for no reason. She loved the queen.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, I guess Canada, weirdly there was some that you got to be that level of cuck worst to talk about the queen in Canada.

[Steph Tolev]

She loved it. She had all these books about her and she'd like have teens watch her walk. Her is way bizarre. So weird, odd stuff. And then I became a disgusting pig comedian. And they didn't like it at first. Now they kind of do. I can't tell. No, my dad finds it funny that it upsets me almost more when I hear him laughing harder at my lady jokes. Anybody else? I'm like, yeah, what's going on back there?

[Stavros Halkias]

He's like, I knew when I was changing those diapers, that was a mess down there.

[Steph Tolev]

That was a big, big. A little hole oil on that thing. Let's shrink this thing up. Can you imagine? I had a big baby. That can't be real.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't think so.

[Steph Tolev]

That's so weird.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't think it is.

[Steph Tolev]

I call my dad right now, hey, how was my pussy babies? And be like, I'm calling the police.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did you have other siblings?

[Steph Tolev]

I have one sister, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay, so he could at least compare to your sister, you know, cuz like, I've seen a. You know, my nephew has one of the littlest dicks of all time right now. But I'm sure it will blossom and into a nice. A nice penis.

[C]

Wow.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay. Blossom into a.

[Stavros Halkias]

Fingers crossed. That's how I know. I really love this kid. It's the first I've ever seen someone have been like, I hope he has a bigger dick than me. But I really in the. For real. That's also how stupid I am. That's legitimately the first thought I had when like my brother was changing his diaper. I was like, I hope that dick gets bigger than mine. And I really believe that and I really hope that for him.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm glad it is small. If, if a baby in a huge dick, that would be so awesome. That'd be insane. Hanging on the side of the diaper, this massive hog. Ew. My dad has this photo in his wallet. It's his favorite joke. He shows everybody.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

He's like, you want to see me as a baby? I'll get him sent to me right now.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it's.

[Steph Tolev]

It's this photo.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think I've seen it.

[Steph Tolev]

It's this black and white photo. But this baby was a huge. And it's just hanging down. He got it laminated. That's how funny he thinks this is. It's in his wallet right now. It's crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Your dad sounds awesome. That's so good.

[Steph Tolev]

And it's so funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is so good.

[Steph Tolev]

So is everybody.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's like, honestly, if a guy, if some like, you know, middle aged guy came up to me was like, you want to see a picture? Me a baby? And he showed me that I don't think I would be able to stop laughing for whatever like, you know, baptism. I was at that.

[Steph Tolev]

He showed. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, he's always showing at baptism.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, it's like weddings, it's like times where you see people.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh yeah. Oh, he's showing it. He's definitely it.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a great bit. I respect your dad for it.

[Steph Tolev]

Is good bit. I love, I love a bit you can drag on for years. Years.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Like every time. My bit is like anytime I see a girl wearing something like super revealing, I go, I almost wear the same thing. That's my bit. I've been doing it since like high school. Cuz it's like obviously I'm not wear that classic. Just a long bit that you can just say whenever to whoever.

[Stavros Halkias]

A life defining bit.

[Steph Tolev]

Like a life defining bit. Yeah, it's fun.

[Stavros Halkias]

We've got a couple those just. Just being stupid. I mean just the way me and El talk to each other. It's like we barely, we barely have to register thought. It's just saying his dick is small, saying he's gay and he wants to have sex with me and that's it. And that just kind of like for eternity. And you know what? We. We're not. We'll tune it out. But then like every once in a while I'll just laugh legitimately. Like even though Even though this is what we've been saying for close to at this point. 20 years.

[Steph Tolev]

20 years.

[Stavros Halkias]

We've known each other since kindergarten, but we've started. God started with the dick jokes. Probably when we were what, 15?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, probably kindergarten. You're both. Baltimore. Is Camodian near the. That.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I mean, it's the shitty burbs.

[Steph Tolev]

I hate that place.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, I hate that place.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm never going back to Demonium's.

[Steph Tolev]

Horrible's hell.

[Stavros Halkias]

Moobi does have a special place in my heart.

[Steph Tolev]

Does it? The John Deere factory. Me up the ass. One of the worst weekends of my life. I. I'm like, I'm going back to Canada. I'm going to hand my green card and I don't deserve it. Hell, no. I'm. I'm sure when it is people there, it feels good.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes.

[Steph Tolev]

But when it's just the bottom. Ooh.

[Stavros Halkias]

Believe me, I've done some tough. Whoa. When it's just the bottom and it can fill 350.

[Steph Tolev]

Yep.

[Stavros Halkias]

And there's no way to not feel that because it goes up.

[Steph Tolev]

There's no way.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not like it just is a long room that you could put some fucking curtains behind. No, it goes. You see the empty amphitheater?

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, you're just seeing emptiness, blackness staring back at you. Well, you're just doing pussy jokes. Silent or. The worst is because I do so many act outs. Doing a big act out and getting no laugh math. It's pathetic. I feel like this is what a cuck would feel like if I was, like, watching my wife and I couldn't get hard.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, that's what that is. You're right. That is an act out to silence is impotence.

[Steph Tolev]

It's way worse than a punchline bombing. Way worse.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, way worse.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, it's pathetic.

[Stavros Halkias]

You could pretend a punchline was just another thing you're saying and speed through it, but you can't, you know, I can't. Take the stool off your chin, pick it up, be like, all right.

[Steph Tolev]

Fully lying down. That's. Oh, that's committing to a bed.

[Stavros Halkias]

Jesus.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, God. Brutal.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, you're a veteran of so much Magoobie's joke House, you know. You know, being shunned by the Bulgarian community in Toronto. So you have a lot of. You have a lot of wisdom.

[Steph Tolev]

Let's give your. Let's give your fans some wisdom.

[Stavros Halkias]

Let's get and, you know, let's put in right here. Maybe be by the time this airs. Hopefully we know when your special's coming out. Where and where? Right now. We're doing it right now.

[Steph Tolev]

What a blast I had on Savvy's World. And I can finally announce it. I have a Special on Netflix June 24th called Filth Queen. Please go watch it. And if you don't like me, hate watch it. Just leave it on. Anyways, also, season two of Tires. Please check that out. Not only because staff is in it, but also because I'm in it and I play his wife. Isn't that right, Susan? Susan. Susan. I swear that's her name. June 24th on Netflix.

[Stavros Halkias]

And of course, see us both on Tires this season. We don't know. Maybe we know when that date is too. Who's to say? I don't know. Come see me on the tour. The tour is already over. I don't really know. It probably is, actually, now that I'm thinking about it. Wow. I'm dead. Yes.

[Steph Tolev]

Both dead. That was so sad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God, El, you'd have to release it, man.

[Steph Tolev]

You'd have to.

[C]

Oh, I. I would. I would release everything that we have banked already.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, what I was going do is chop it up into, like. He would take every podcast, make them 45 minutes so that he could. Yeah, so that he could live off of me a little longer, even when I'm dead. That's right.

[C]

The calls are going to be Patreon only for the next two months.

[Stavros Halkias]

While he desperately tries to program my me into an AI, he's feeding every podcast we've ever done into AI to be like, we have to figure this out. I just bought a car. All right, what do we got? Eldis.

[D]

Hi. Hi, Sabi. Hi, Eldis. Hi, Guest. So this is kind of my question. So I have been dating my boyfriend almost a year. It's going really well. We've decided to move in together. But my question is we kind of have different sex drives. His is definitely lower than mine. He's okay with, like, once or twice a week. I'm okay. I'd rather do four or five times a week. So we tend to meet in the middle a lot.

[Stavros Halkias]

Respect this woman.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[D]

I've asked him, like, is there anything you'd like me to do? To, like, help is, like, is there anything I can do? And he said no. Like, he's really happy with everything. He just has a lower sex drive, so there's that. But I guess my question is because right now I have my own apartment I can masturbate in.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nice. But congrats.

[D]

If we move in together. I kind of don't have that private space. So I guess kind of my question is, how do I safely masturbate without my boyfriend kind of feeling ashamed or.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, less of a man?

[D]

I don't know. Inadequate.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right. Holy.

[D]

Yeah, that's probably my question. Thank you. Thank you for the show. It's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, thank you. Tough stuff. She's like, is there anything I could do? He's, like, not looking up from his game. Yeah, no, I'm good. No, it's good. Good.

[Steph Tolev]

She's just mastering whatever she wants.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Steph Tolev]

It's. You share a space now. And if he doesn't want to. I'm like, once or twice a week. That's. I need every day or I get pissy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wow.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, I'm. I'm a pervert.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's how we keep. That's how we keep Shooter junior around.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm sucking his balls every morning I wake up. Good morning, sweetie. You're never getting away. I feel. No. If he doesn't want to do it more you. It's. You master whatever the hell you want, whenever you want.

[Stavros Halkias]

I agree. I mean, beating. You can't be ashamed to beat. Like, let's just. Again, look at this from the other side.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, sorry.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's okay.

[Steph Tolev]

Got a post on Tik Tok.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nice. Hilarious ringtone. The is.

[Steph Tolev]

That's literally my posting on Tik Tok Alarm. Sad, pathetic and sad. Maybe I want to die, actually. Okay. Posting on Tick Tock.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I mean, what is the. You know, when you put it that way, what's 770 years of social media posting? Just take me now.

[Steph Tolev]

I feel like. Also, does he not leave the house? Like, how long do you take to masturbate? I need three minutes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah. Max. I'm liking a lot of what I'm hearing here, Steph. That's great.

[Steph Tolev]

I just really feel like, you know what? Get him to go out the second he leaves. Have a little thing or be like, I'm having a map. Excuse me. Give me some privacy. Go in there. How loud your vibrator? Maybe get a smaller one. That's.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's he up. First of all, he's like. I said, he's definitely gaming while you're beating off.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes. We can't hear you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. How long have they been dating, too?

[Steph Tolev]

She had a year, didn't. A year.

[Stavros Halkias]

She said a year is a little. A year is a little soon for your net for just like, maybe not for you to knock off to once a week. As a man, in my opinion, I.

[Steph Tolev]

Think yeah, no, no, that year is kind of crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like this. Look, if you guys have been together for a few years and you fucking. You realize, hey, just our natural rhythms, there should still be a little bit of just a little excitement to get you over. Especially if your girlfriend's beg. It'd be different if, like, both of you were just kind of a once or twice a week. Like, your girlfriend's begging you at a year, in a year. I'm a little scared about that person personally.

[C]

Yeah, it feels like she's, like, asking the wrong question here. The question isn't like, how do I masturbate in private when, like, I don't have my own space anymore? It's more about, like, is it. Is it adequate for him to be like, nah, I'm good. When you're like, I want to more.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. That is a little weird when it's the base. When you're building the. Your relationship right now and he's like, no, I'm. I'm good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does he have low T? Like, is this guy healthy? Does he have low T? Because I could tell you again, again, your sex drive is much lower when you're, you know, a fat drug addict than when you're, like, going to the gym. Just speaking hypothetically here, of course. Then when you're going to the gym and like, you know, and like, taking care of yourself because, like, how old is he? Maybe we don't want to shame and maybe just is, you know, I'm sure there are once or twice a week guys, but.

[C]

Yeah. I wonder if, like, he is older. That would change it in my mind a little. But they're like, close. Close. If they're close to the same age, that is a little weird.

[Steph Tolev]

But if he said, I'm happy about this also, I'm like, also, does she have any doors in this apartment? I'm confused. Go to the bathroom.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Beating up. Listen, you're gonna figure out how to beat off. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You go to the bathroom with the shower on.

[Stavros Halkias]

Worrying about this is crazy.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because, like, again, this. Usually it's the flip side, right? Usually it's the guy. And like.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, we've.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're all experts at getting a quick beat in, right? We've done it our whole lives since we were 12 years old, because we've had to, you know, first we were hiding from our parents, now we're hiding from our wives. But. But I would. And so you're fine there even when you move in. Whatever. I just, you know, maybe we're all just. Maybe you're just talking to a podcast full of freaks. Right. Full of sex freaks. But to me, I would just. And it's not just the sex. It's like you're so early on where it's like, this is something that's pretty important to you, and it doesn't really feel like. I mean, she says we kind of meet in the middle. My hunch is you meet closer towards him. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

This. I would say the. The thing I would be wary of is. Is compromising too much towards him on things that are important to you because certain things are deal breakers. I'm not saying this is when you're very happy. Again, maybe this isn't. I'm just saying I would be cognizant of that. Of like. Like, do you find yourself kind of caving a little more to keep harmony, especially. Which is hilarious when what we're talking about, caving is sucking him off.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Letting him suck.

[Steph Tolev]

Like. Like having sex one more time a week. He's like, I just can't.

[Stavros Halkias]

Come on. Really?

[Steph Tolev]

This again?

[Stavros Halkias]

You have to cook up a parlay.

[Steph Tolev]

You.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

I feel like. I feel like maybe there should be another. Another more open question with her being like, look, I. I want this.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Not just like, oh, you're okay. Like, I want this.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Let's figure that out.

[Stavros Halkias]

And if you've thought all this through, great, ignore us and just beat off. You'll. I think you'll find it's easy to find times to jack off.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah. There's a lot of water from dildos just getting a shower.

[Stavros Halkias]

But even her saying she doesn't want him to feel inadequate kind of informs my. That's my guess here. Because she's like. She's really thinking about this. This. She's not even say. She's like, I have made peace with the fact that I'll have to jack off more than I. But I don't want him to feel sad that he doesn't me. And it's like, well, at this point, he can feel a little. You know, there's a. He doesn't have to feel. Don't make him feel bad. But it's like, you know, if you were constantly taking the trash out and he was just sitting there, he would probably feel inadequate or he would feel embarrassed. It's like. And maybe we'd like to not think of sex as a chore of a relationship, but sometimes it boils down to that. You know what I mean? It's like he's there are some dude. And it's like, maybe you guys have struck an agreement, but he also has to live with that agreement personally. You don't have to pretend he's some great Coxman.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're like, I accept you for your. But, you know, I'd like to get my cracked open a couple more times a week.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[C]

He should feel like a little cognitive dissonance when he's, like, watching the football game, playing.

[Stavros Halkias]

This could be salt. You literally could your. It's like you don't want to. Your girlfriend. Girlfriend. And like, you haven't her since Monday. It's Thursday. You wouldn't mind getting your dick sucked.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, you live together. That's the thing. Together, it's fine. But I'm like, I'm horny all the time.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah, I know. I mean, like, that's. I think that's so I would say it's a. Yeah. Keep everything we said in mind. Think. Think critically about, you know, whether you are truly getting your needs met. And if you are and if we're just sounding alarms for no reason. You'll be able to sneak a couple. Jackson. No problem.

[Steph Tolev]

A couple fingerings in there. It'll be good.

[E]

Hey, Stubbed. Hey, LD Love the podcast, love the movie. Congrats on everything you got going on. I'm 29 and I'm dating a girl who is 25. She'll be 26 this month. We've been together for two and a half years now. Know. But I was kind of her first everything. First kids, her boyfriend.

[Stavros Halkias]

Whoa.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[E]

Just for a little context, she does come from older parents who are pretty conservative and traditional.

[Stavros Halkias]

Don't kiss a guy till 23. Conservative.

[E]

But about a year into our relationship, she helped me get sober and helped me through a pretty tough time in my life. Life. And I'm pretty sure that she's. Well, I am sure that she's the one that I want to be with and I want to marry. Also, she's way hotter than I have any right to be dating. So that definitely.

[Stavros Halkias]

Amen.

[E]

So I want to get married. It's something that, you know, because I was her first. She also pictures that, like, you know, I'm kind of the Prince Charming that.

[Stavros Halkias]

She sound like she got to stop doing heroin. I missed that part. Part of Snow White where she's dragging Eric's head out of a gutter.

[Steph Tolev]

Getting the needle out of his arm.

[Stavros Halkias]

No. Sorry. I'm sure you have a beautiful relationship. It's a comedy program. Go ahead.

[E]

Eldis Sounds like her One and only for life. And I think that's great, and I'm happy to be that. I already bought the ring.

[Stavros Halkias]

Nice.

[E]

Okay, I'm ready to propose, but she's starting to kind of put. Put the pressure on. And I think part of it is because she still lives with her parents and she still has a curfew at my place. Spent the night definitely, like really conservative, really old school. And I think she's just kind of sick of it. So my only worry is, is she really just putting the pressure on because she wants out of this situation. She's even told me, like, hey, if we're married by the end of 2026, I'm not gonna bother moving out and getting my own place because we'll just be together at that point. But is that kind of a red flag that you know, you're on the same page?

[Steph Tolev]

You want to marry her?

[Stavros Halkias]

You bought the ring, bro.

[Steph Tolev]

This like, yeah, she wants out of the fucking house. Get her out of her fucking psycho parents house.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're on the same. Like, this would. I mean, this would be different if you were like, I don't know if.

[Steph Tolev]

I want to get married.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. And by the way, if you were to say, like, hey, I'm her first. You know, she comes from this weird background is I'm her first relationship I have. I just am a little worried because I'd like her to. She's never really. She's never even even lived as an adult on her own. She never fucking paid rent. She's never like fucking called, you know, a cable company or an Internet company. Like she doesn't have. She hasn't done basic things. You would be. If you said, hey, I'd rather like spend a little more time and let. And you know, maybe she can actually spend the night at my house. If you said any of those things, then I would kind of be on your side about is she trying to pressure me just to get out of this race? But you just said, she's who I want to be with. I bought the.

[Steph Tolev]

You bought the ring.

[Stavros Halkias]

You spend three months salary, I'm gonna guess, $900 on the ring. Right. Like, like you've done it. Right. So. So you're Right now and we'll finish the call. But basically you're mad that she's on the same page as you, essentially because you want to propose to her. So anyway, that's. Let's just keep that in mind. But let's finish up. Let's see what he has to say.

[E]

That, you know, I. I Have no doubts about our relationship or anything, but more so just that. Is she trying to speed up the timeline?

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it's like, dude, literally, it's like. It's like it's. He'll even. We'll even find red flags. This girl is like what every man, male, male, like misogynist podcaster talks about. She is a virgin who wants to marry you. Like. Like, want. Like. She's never. There's no body count. There's no body count. Zero. There's no.

[Steph Tolev]

She's the only person on the planet with no hpv. Marry her.

[Stavros Halkias]

She wants you. She's talking about being a trad wife. Even this woman is her boyfriend's like, I don't know. Is she out to get me secretly?

[Steph Tolev]

You have the ring.

[Stavros Halkias]

You want to marry her.

[Steph Tolev]

You have no qualms.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it doesn't.

[Steph Tolev]

Unless she wants out, of course, but she wants live with Hitler. You know the hell.

[Stavros Halkias]

Go ahead, Eldis. Let's finish this up before we really.

[E]

Kind of warded over and controlled by her older conservative parents. So. Yeah. What do you think? Do you think I should try to speed up the timeline as well? Like I say, I have the ring. I'm ready to go. But I only thing that gives me hesitation is how desperately she's trying to.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because you love her. You love each other. Apparently.

[E]

L.D. thanks. Guests.

[Steph Tolev]

Also. Wouldn't you also want her out of the situation? Wouldn't you want to. Your virgin wife.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Over at your house, living together.

[Stavros Halkias]

They have. She just hasn't spent the night. Right. It assumes.

[C]

I would assume so. He didn't specify though.

[Stavros Halkias]

But yeah, I know what you're saying. Like, yes. If we're taking everything he's saying at face value. I love the woman I love who helped me get sober.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who I know I want to be with. With so much. I purchased a ring already rings purchased.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's eager to marry me.

[Steph Tolev]

Can't wait.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's living somewhere annoying and would rather be with me, the love of her life, than the annoying living situation she's in.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Does that mean she's got ulterior motives? Like, what the are you talking about?

[Steph Tolev]

Put the ring on her now.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's crazy that you've made us one of the most like, one of the most like, like, you should 100 people and like, you know, don't get married young. You've made us be like, why aren't you marrying this virgin?

[Steph Tolev]

I'm annoyed by this like.

[Stavros Halkias]

And like, usually my advice would be like to this girl, my advice would be like, are you really ready to get married? You know what I mean? But like, whatever. You guys have figured it out and who knows, who knows what happens? But like, like, you might have just hit the sweet spot of somebody who has just enough conservative values to never want to go crazy.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But not enough that she doesn't want to live that way. You know what I mean? Like, you might, you might. You might both have just been perfect for each other in your lives.

[Steph Tolev]

Right back the case here.

[Stavros Halkias]

So it's crazy that you've got us to be like, yes, you should marry this virgin who's never kissed another man. But you figured out a way to get us to do it somehow I just don't. And look, maybe this is just natural. Everyone has cold feet. Everyone overanalyzes. And you know, marriage is ultimately a commitment. And it's like, you know, but everything he said, everything he said he's cool with all that stuff. All the stuff that somebody else might find a little weird. He's all good.

[Steph Tolev]

And then I don't. I think a red flag would be her saying like, oh, you know, if she had mentioned any other man or wanting to fuck anybody else, that's a red flag to me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right, right.

[Steph Tolev]

But her just wanting to be with you and to get out of parents house, that's the.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Who the fuck. I live my parents for three months during COVID and I almost killed the boat. You can't be with your family at this age anymore. You're 25. Sex with your family. Yeah, get her out. Yeah, get her out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Suck her STD free right now. Get her out of your house.

[Stavros Halkias]

I agree. Yeah, dude, I don't. I guess, whatever. I don't know why you're having these second thoughts, but we can tell you from everything you're saying. Don't worry about it.

[Steph Tolev]

Get her out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Get in the zone.

[Steph Tolev]

Get in the zone.

[Stavros Halkias]

Autozone.

[Steph Tolev]

Autozone.

[Stavros Halkias]

Take her to autozone.

[Steph Tolev]

I love autozone.

[Stavros Halkias]

It is kind of nice, pleasing all the boxes and stuff. They let you use the little scanner when your check engine light comes on.

[Steph Tolev]

I know. Get out there, chat with them.

[Stavros Halkias]

What else we got? Eldis?

[F]

Hey, Savvy Elvis. An esteemed guest. I'm five seven with a huge rack. I just need a little bit of advice. So I'm a longtime east coaster my whole life and I'm living on the west coast now for the first time. And it's a big adjustment socially. I'm having a little bit of trouble making friends. Well, especially because I'm in like a brand new career as well.

[Steph Tolev]

Maybe that's more corporate and I think.

[Stavros Halkias]

That should only help.

[Steph Tolev]

This has nothing to do with her tits at all.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, just saying.

[Steph Tolev]

I just rack for no reason.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would listen more intently.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay. Okay. I was like, don't hit me. People say that they might not like that.

[C]

That's like rush service. Like you get priority in the queue.

[Steph Tolev]

That's crazy. Wow. Huge rack. Okay. Threw me off.

[F]

Brand new industry, much more corporate and like, I don't know, what's the word? Vain than the last jobs I've had. And I think I'm pretty agreeable. I think I'm a pretty easygoing person to get along with. But I'm just having trouble like connecting with people out here and I'm struggling and I think I come across as really shy, which I'm actually not. I'm just trying to like be chill in front of people. But I'm worried that that's making me come across as shy and like, not interesting. So I guess my question is how much of my actual personality do I let out in front of these people? And what's the best way to make friends with Californians when you're not used to being around Californians? If you, if you have any expertise in the area, I'd really appreciate any help. Love the show. Long time listener. I think you might be the love of my life. Thanks so much, Bobby. Bye.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hey, who knows? Well, we're coming on the west coast on the tour though it's already gone by now, so.

[Steph Tolev]

Hey, DM, maybe she's already DM'd you this huge tip. How you text those things in the way, I will say, okay, this is very relatable. Yeah, well, not because I moved from east coast. I'm east coast Toronto. I moved to Los Angeles. It was very hard to. To make friends because Californians are very in their own way. You, what you have to do is find people who aren't from California. All of my friends were not. I started like. And I, I have friends now that aren't in the business. So because I was like, it was just comedians, like male micros that I hated. I started going this coffee shop. I end up yapping this one girl's ear off. We kind of got friends. I got a dog, went to the dog park. You have to find things outside of your of your shoes. Like, literally. I became good friends this girl because our puppies were friends.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Steph Tolev]

So like anything else, if you can join a sports team, if you have time for that or like just try to do something outside your work people because those are probably not the people that you want to hang out with.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right. I think work people is like, you don't want to put out your personality. You want to give just enough.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You want to put just enough. You want to be amenable, you want to be agreeable, whatever. If they think you're shy, who really gives a. You know, Know the people you work with, half the time they're not ever going to be your friends.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, like, you just don't want. And you don't even necessarily want that. Right. I think what you said is great. It's like you have to start building your life outside of that. And yeah, California people can be a little, A little strange, but also, you know, they're a little chill. They're a little too chill sometimes. A little, little flaky, whatever. A little fake to your face, whatever. But, but yeah, the transplant advice is really good advice, I think.

[Steph Tolev]

I also think what you should do is maybe if you want to, like, show them a little more personality, maybe have a dinner night, maybe plan a dinner party or have something where you invite your work friends and do like. Because sometimes if you all go out and you all get kind of drunk, you're like, oh, this person is kind of cool. But you didn't realize it works. So maybe try that if you want to.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't absolutely. In the past, in the past, when I've ever. When I've had like a couple, you know, when I did have day jobs, it's like, yeah, it's not going to happen at work. You got to kind of take it to A. And happy hours are the easiest thing in the world. Just be like, hey, you want to go grab some drinks, whatever. But even just being like, hey, I'm having a barbecue, or like, let's go to this place and get drinks on a weekend. Some random. Yeah, yeah, some. Watch a sports game.

[Steph Tolev]

Take them. Here's. Here you go. I got, I got. I can have crap. Come see me at the Comedy Store. I'll get you tickets, you'll look cool. Bring a couple friends because that's. You don't have to talk to them.

[Stavros Halkias]

Them. That actually is a great. Actually commenters are a great.

[Steph Tolev]

They're great. You come, you get some drinks, you, you talk before the show starts. The show starts, someone's going to bomb. Cuz somebody always bombs you all. You all make fun of that person. You're all excited and then you go home and that's it. You had a nice bonding. I think that's a.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, that's a good, that's a good idea. I do think comedy. Cuz and the thing is like we don't even think about it because it's our. It's been our entire lives since you know, God knows when. But most people go to like five comedy shows in their life. Life.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean? Like yeah, sure there's some like super fans that come out and see you but like mo. Most regular will like it's a special night out. It's a fun, interesting thing to do.

[Steph Tolev]

You dress up, you can get pre drinks, you can have like a. Yeah, it's. It's very. And. And that's the time for you to be like I show that you are fun and interesting and you can like you know, joke around about the comics after and show them that you're like. That's a cool thing to also bring people to.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, that's a good friend. That's a good friend thing because like some people say for dates it's like.

[Steph Tolev]

You know, for days.

[Stavros Halkias]

You don't want to do it for days.

[Steph Tolev]

Bizarre.

[Stavros Halkias]

But like for days it's like sometimes an earlier date. It's like, you know, you want to go on your first date and like just see if you are compatible. But then like a movie is a pretty good early date because it's again not that much pressure. You don't have to fill up four or five hours of conversation. You go, you have a shared experience, you have something to talk about. And this is kind of like a much better. This is like a funner like friend thing of where it's like oh yeah, we. You'll always be able to just chat about the thing and then. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And then on Monday you all could be like remember that we still talking about the one comedian we all hated.

[Stavros Halkias]

Totally, totally, totally.

[Steph Tolev]

It's probably going to be me. Can all bond over how bad I was.

[Stavros Halkias]

They made fun of the one guy shirt and it was a thing the comedian will never think about again for the rest of his life. It will haunt him.

[Steph Tolev]

Uhhuh. Sit up front.

[Stavros Halkias]

But yeah, I think like if you want to peel off the few interesting people you know that you like from your job. That's and. And kind of slow. You want to slow. You don't want to hit them with your personality right away.

[Steph Tolev]

No, no, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a slow. Yeah. Slowly kind of leak out who you are and then. Yeah. Otherwise go make friends outside of it all those ways. Steph was Saying. But, you know, moving is tough.

[Steph Tolev]

And it. Also, making friends at this age is weird.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really tough and weird.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, you feel bizarre. Like, I literally. Mexico coffee shop. And I was like, I know this is weird, but I want to be friends with you. Yeah, okay, me too. And then you feel like a pervert, but you're like, right, right. Because it's kids. You say, okay, we're friends now, but as an adult, you're like, can I have your phone number?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Enjoy your conversation. You feel strange doing it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'd love to see you again. To someone you don't want to.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a hilarious. Say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think the thing about, you know, especially the West Coast, I think a lot of people find themselves transplanted France to the west coast, so it's a little easier to, like, you know, that's a little more in the culture of, like, picking up a friend.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Especially if you're in a city where, like, New York is like this. I don't know if she said she's in LA or if she's in just California.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But, like, if you're in particular in a city where a lot of people are just children, like, a lot of adults are just children forever in New York. Same thing as la. Like, it's a little easier than some places, but, you know, either way, good luck. Luck. We're rooting for you.

[Steph Tolev]

Show savvy. You're a huge.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you have to send me a picture of your knockers, I wouldn't be too mad if you have to. What else we got? Elders?

[G]

Hey, Stabby Baby and company. My wife and I don't have a ton of sex, but a couple months ago, I went on a trip with my family and she stayed home. And the night before I left, she threw down with a vigor that I haven't experienced in a long time. She was pretty crazy, you know? Gave me the best blowjob I've had in a while. She was very enthusiastic and we were very into it. And I'm just wondering, how do I get the. That same energy without constantly having to go on trips by myself?

[Stavros Halkias]

This guy's supposed to be Delta, double diamond, platinum medallion.

[G]

Go on trips by myself or making her abandonment issues worse.

[Stavros Halkias]

Interesting.

[G]

For context. She told me what every guy wants to hear during. And she said, do whatever you want want to me. And I was so taken aback that the only thing I could think of was to do some finger stuff with her butt.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[G]

Afterwards, she even said, that's all you had.

[Stavros Halkias]

Holy.

[G]

To prove myself.

[Stavros Halkias]

I got other stuff. Gulp.

[G]

To prove myself. But I just don't know. Know how to get that energy from her without, you know, leaving.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm sort of understanding why. So. Yeah.

[G]

Spice you have would be great. Love the new weight loss series. I hope it works this time.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. I'm glad you can't your wife, pal. I'm glad you. You somehow got cucked just by your wife's expectations.

[Steph Tolev]

The heck.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, pinky, am I. Do whatever you want, Pink. One knuckle in her ass. Amateur. Learn how to your wife, chief. I hope. I hope that works next time, too. I hope your wife comes next time, too, you animal. Go ahead. I'll just finish this thing.

[G]

And maybe if it doesn't, you should get in some PDS and get zed up. And how about Foley can have your own weight loss challenge?

[Stavros Halkias]

What are you talking about? Thank you. This is why you're blowing it. This is why you're blowing it with your wife, man. Your general lackadaisical demeanor. You have no. You have. Honestly, no. She clearly wanted to be dominated, and all you could think of was a thumb in her ass, which is standard stuff.

[Steph Tolev]

And he also. The problem with me with that was that he said, put it in her butt. Like. Like, if you're saying butt instead of fingered or ass, something's wrong.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, you gotta man up. Maybe. If you want to be more energetic, then do this to her. Out of nowhere, start fooling around with her and be aggressive. I think she's something. She wants that.

[Stavros Halkias]

It does feel like she wants some aggression here. And also, like, you know, in the.

[Steph Tolev]

That's all you got. That's.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. That's all you got from your boyfriend.

[Steph Tolev]

Said that I would. Myself. That's all you got? I'd be like, what?

[Stavros Halkias]

But I have to say, it is, like, that's one thing. Like, to get it from a woman. Woman who was, like, totally subservient to you is actually devastating on levels where it's like. Like, I've definitely hooked up with people where I was like, oh, man, this really is more of a challenge, you know, where they're, like, so they're, like, submissive, but, like, also, like, out of their minds a little bit. And it's like. Or they were, like, really nice. And then it's, like, this crazy. And I do feel like, oh, I have to, like, really the. Out of this person. Or I'm, like, embarrassing. Embarrassing myself.

[Steph Tolev]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, you know what I mean? Like, it's a challenge where it's like, like, that's all you got is like, I. You could have done anything. And it's just like that would truly. Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

What. But what more really can you do when something asked that, would you want to be slapped or choked?

[Stavros Halkias]

Probably slap choked her mouth in a wild way. You know, toss her around. It's just more of an animal.

[Steph Tolev]

Pretty crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it's just more of a. Like, it's. It's an energy thing. And this guy is so, so low energy. Like, that's the thing. It's like, it's like a. You want to be ravenous. You want. You know what I mean? Like, and he doesn't seem like, he's just like, golly, that was a nice beger. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, you have a little bit too all shucks energy. And that's, and that's the problem here is that like my gut, my, my knee jerk reaction when he's like, how do I get this out of my wife? Is like, why are you asking us? Why aren't you asking your wife? Yes, you know what I mean?

[Steph Tolev]

Like, and change things up a bit more. Don't. Just, just you're leaving. Clearly not a lot's happening. This relationship that you leaving is getting her going o something different. Like maybe do some other.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, maybe she wants you to like, you should talk to her about. You should be like, that was sick. It caught me a little off guard. I'd love, you know, like, how can we get in that zone more? That was awesome. Now the problem is you brought up your weight loss. No, no, no, no, no, no. The problem is that like unfortunate, like in some instances, probably what she wants is for him to just take control. Right? Like, and so meekly asking how do I get head like that again? Like, might not do it.

[Steph Tolev]

No, no, no. That's not a turn on.

[Stavros Halkias]

But at the same time, you. Communication is important, right?

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

So it's like you should say like, hey, that was, you know, you can. Can talk to her about it. And then once you know for sure what she wants, that's when you have to like spring into action. Right? Like, and yeah, I would say like, you gotta. It sounds like she wants you to really get. Get in the zone a little bit more. So what's. And, and all the other thing that sometimes with these sex questions that people miss out on is like, you know, this can be a symptom of other. Like, what's your relationship? Like, yeah, like, does she respect you as a man? Like, do you. How are you do. Like, are you like, you know, are you providing, like, all this that, like, affects a relationship? Do you pull your weight around the house? Like, all this other. All that stuff goes into sex. So it's like.

[Steph Tolev]

And also, like, if you leaving, like, is he just home all day, all the time, and the second he gets up to leave, like, there's gotta be something else there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Is she cheating on you? You went on a trip? Trip. She's like, I gotta practice these new moves for my. For my boyfriend, so I'm gonna practice on my husband? Is that what happened? Who's to say? But no, I. I think you have to, like, have a little discussion, and then, like, you got to be a little more assertive, in my opinion.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes. A lot of this comes from way more of a discussion, I think that a lot of people are scared to have, which is strange. But.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah, you could just. And you don't want it to be. You want it to happen when it's not. The vibes are not sexual at all. Yeah, you want it. You want to separate the act. You don't be turned on and be like, so what do you want me to do? Because that's. That's so. You know what I mean? Like, that sucks. You know, when you're in the zone, you want this to be like, a cold, rational discussion of what you want in this area of your life. And then when it's actually time, you just want to take those lessons and just apply them.

[Steph Tolev]

Ravisher.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, do your best, buddy.

[Steph Tolev]

Ravish.

[Stavros Halkias]

Do your best. What do we got? Little eldest, Eldest, Honored guest. Really simple question.

[E]

How do I give less of a.

[Stavros Halkias]

Fuck about what other people think?

[C]

I'm tired of worrying about offending people.

[Stavros Halkias]

That are fully offensive and defending.

[C]

I don't want my brain space to be taken up with worrying about whether I've offended their, you know, antiquated viewpoints and worldviews.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's it. We're gonna need a little more context on what you think an antiquated viewpoint is.

[Steph Tolev]

And who is he. He saying this, too? Why is he surrounding himself with people that already find him clearly a very offensive.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

You got the wrong friend group.

[Stavros Halkias]

Offensive is so interesting because it's like, are you talking about, like, are you a. Like, is. Are we talking to a. Someone who's in. In, like, kind of an oppressive situation? Are we talking to a. A cowardly racist who wants to say slurs more? I don't think so. But it's like. But once you start saying offensive. Yeah, you just, like, you're like, what, are you offended? It's just they've taken that word from. From us. Where it's like, anyone who's like, I don't even give a crap about being offensive. It's like, I'm a little. And I don't think that's what's going on here. Maybe what's going on is that, like, I don't know. He doesn't believe in himself enough. Like, I don't. I don't. It's kind of. He's just being so vague.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know what you mean.

[Steph Tolev]

I don't know what he meant. Like, yeah, I. I need to know. Are you trying to say the N word? Because I'm not going to help you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Steph Tolev]

I'm not gonna be like, well, don't hang out with black people. I don't know what. I'm not sure to say this guy because at the beginning, they're not giving a. I was like, oh, I'm relating to this totally. Because once I turn, like, my 30s, like, I don't give a. About anybody anymore by myself. But this is like, what. What do you want to say?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, the offensive thing is interesting and like, the viewpoints thing was like. Because on a personal level. Level, I definitely know what it feels like to care what people think about you.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, so much like you said when you turn 30. I. I really think it was in my 30s for sure, where I was like, why do I give a. You can't. And I really, like, got to the root of it and like, worked on that stuff in therapy about, like, just kind of like, you know, actually being assertive about what I want and like all this kind of stuff. And that's fair. All that stuff is very fair, personally, to. To want that.

[Steph Tolev]

But.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I just don't know what you mean about, like. And it's not. But that to me is not about viewpoints and world views. To me, that's about, like, how you're treated on a personal level. Like, is that what you're talking about? Are you like, yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

He's going to have to call back in. This is.

[Stavros Halkias]

I need to know a little more. Eldest. Great screening, dude. Just the most nonsense. Non. It's all. There's all. There's like, you know, it's not a simple question. I also don't know what he means. Means how do I give less of a. About what other people.

[Steph Tolev]

I feel like this is like a crazy trumper.

[Stavros Halkias]

It could be. Or it could be a guy somebody wants to go Trans, you know, we don't know.

[Steph Tolev]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, it's like, that's the hard part is like.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Does he think antiquated viewpoints are the gender binary or does he think that, like, now race mixing has been around since the 50s and that's antiquated?

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean? Like, because, like, depending on. On which one were on your side, you know? But yeah. I think in general, maybe this vagueness is also a symptom of, like, this guy doesn't believe in himself. He can't even bring himself to say what he. What he.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

What he wants.

[Steph Tolev]

Maybe it's something like, so even, like, not even offensive. Like, he just. Yeah, maybe he's just like a sweet boy.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think it could be that.

[Steph Tolev]

No, I just.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I think it could be. I think it could be because I definitely remember wanting to. To like, not care what others thought of me or like, whatever when I'm, like, younger and all that takes is.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, sort of being offending people.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. What are you offending them about?

[Steph Tolev]

Offensive.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know. I think I'll just screwed the pooch on this one.

[C]

I don't know. I think the subtext was like, kind of, you know, just talking about, like, political. When what. That's what I thought of when I saw, like, antiquated viewpoints and world views and.

[Stavros Halkias]

Does he mean, like, talking to his conservative uncle?

[C]

That's kind of the vibe I got from it, but.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, if it's family, like, hey, by the way. No, I don't think so. I think elders might. Might be right, but we just don't know for a fact. But when you're parsing things. Elders. Not a great question. When we have to fucking, like, we're like, this is the Rosetta stone. And we're trying to, like, get clues as to what each thing might mean. Mean, now, if it's your family, whatever.

[Steph Tolev]

Like, who cares at this point.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, your family, you're just like, whatever. Off. They're not. You don't have to let them have, like, you know, hold power over you, I guess.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes, you're gonna have. You know, I have. I went to a funeral with sad. And then. And then you start talking to your family friends who you love so much, and they're. They are immigrants and they are talking about, we have to get the immigrants out.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it's like, I can't touch this right now. I'm sad. Your cousin came in from Canada illegally. I remember that. But fine, we'll just let this go right? You know what I mean? Like, we don't. Yeah, you're right. And. And most of you have restaurants where you employ illegal immigrants, but we're not Cat. You know what I mean? Like, I'm not ruining a funeral to have this discussion. You know what I mean? Like, and you just have to remember, you know, if it's people that you have, that you have a relationship with and they're older and they're setting their way ways, focus on your. Focus on what's special about them to you.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And if you can sort of slowly around the edges, try and have honest and open conversations about what you believe in in a way that's not confrontational. And then if there's people who, you know, if they're antiquated viewpoints, whatever you mean by that, if there's just people in your life that are ignorant and, you know, disagree with the things you agree with and like, you cut those people out of your life if they're not important enough to. To make, you know. But again, we don't. We have no fucking clue. Elvis blew it. He tried to fuck. He half heartedly defended himself with the subtext just the fuck up and play us one good one to go out on, you piece of shit.

[C]

Okay, this is. This is bring. This is going back to. We got a lot of responses to the ongoing debate of is sending funny memes. Memes. Does that make you funny or not?

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. And you chose to do an episode that will come out months from now for us to address this. Two for two on the way out. Eldest, but go ahead.

[C]

Let's hear it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Trip Planner by Expedia. You were made to have strong opinions about sand. We were made to help you and your friends find a place on the beach with a pool and a marina and a waterfall and a soaking tub. Expedia made to travel. McCrispy strips are now at McDonald's. I hope you're ready for the most dippable chicken in McDonald's history. Dip it in all the sauces. Dip it in that hot sauce in your bag. Dip it in your McFlurry. Your dip is your business. McCrispy strips at McDonald's.

[F]

Hey, Savvy, eldest and guest. I have something to add to the conversation about me curation and funniness. And then I also have a plan follow up question that's related. If you don't feel like bringing this to air because you don't want to host discourse. That's so fair.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. We're. We're a marketplace of ideas.

[F]

I feel like the guy who called in and the folks that agree with him are fundamentally misunderstanding the difference between, like, being funny and having a sense of humor. Yes, like, appreciating humor is a wonderful thing, but that doesn't. Doesn't make you funny yourself. And I think that it's like fine to recognize that, like sometimes you will be the funny person in the room. But often the thing that we like, see as being funny is really just like having a sense of humor, being able to appreciate other people's like, creative energy. Anyway, so I think you're right about pause.

[Stavros Halkias]

Does she have. Now we get into her question. Yeah, I think that's fair. I think that's what we were getting at. Somebody called in and. Or a woman called in and said she's funny because she sends her boyfriend really funny memes.

[Steph Tolev]

Well, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And we were like, you're not funny at all. And you're right. Curation and having a sense of humor. And that's a good point.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I can like a nice painting, I can have good taste in art, but.

[Steph Tolev]

I can't go over here.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Pick up a brush or whatever. So I think that, you know, I think she made a nice. Nice.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, it's very well worded.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well worded point. So we host. We hosted the. The Discourse. That was an episode that came out.

[C]

When we talked about on the Kate Berlant episode, a response to it. So I think that's what like triggered this. And we got like a lot of very impassioned voicemails.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like a lot of people aren't funny pretending they are. You're not funny if you, like, this is the pro. What happens in a. In like somebody else created those memes. You idiots. You didn't create them. Okay. Eventually, if we're. If it's a society just based on curation, who makes the fucking thing that you curate? Is it you? And maybe some people start that way. Right? Some people like and like some film. Some great directors started as critics. You know what I mean? Like, that does happen. Some people who really study the thing and have a desire to create. Fine. You can. I'm not saying you can't ever be funny, but you are not funny if you pick out good memes. And I'm. You know what? I'm not gonna get mad. Mad. Our friend. Our friend put it very nicely. I'll just let her speak for us. But yes. You just are out of your mind if you think picking good memes makes you fun.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, that's. You've Done nothing. You scroll through a phone, you've done nothing. Get up on Stage when you're 17 years old, do stand up comedy. Suck my dick.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Somehow get successful even though there. There's really no reason. It worked out for you like the rest of us, like the. Of the rest, 40 or so of us that get to do this or. Yeah. Like, go into your life knowing you're probably going to fail and then just, you know, maybe you're one of the lucky ones, you know, but until you face. Until you're 23 with no money and being like, hey, if this is what it is, great. Who gives a fuck? Then come back to me. But whatever. Fuck you guys. What? Let's. Let's answer our friend's question here.

[F]

Elders Dating on dating apps. And I date men. And I was just curious about your thoughts on something. This is probably just like me having a little bit of a bias and being a bit of a dick.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[F]

But I feel like every time that I see a man mention something about, like, wanting a woman with a sense of humor on their dating profile, I like, I take that as so you.

[Steph Tolev]

Want to be an actor.

[F]

And I've immediately, like, set the tone that, like, you're gonna be like, oh, well, it's just a joke. Like, why can't you take a joke? This is probably, like, not a correct video, but I was just curious what your thoughts are on it. Anyway, I am coming to your Seattle show and super excited to see you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Hell yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

Bye. I like this question. This is a good question. This is very relatable. Definitely dealt with like, men don't like funny women and they're lying. They got a piece of up and laugh at them is what they want.

[Stavros Halkias]

To do with styles of comedy. Maybe. Maybe a little more subdued, especially on the apps. Trust me, you're right.

[Steph Tolev]

I would put that I was. I would go back and forth because I was in the apps for years. I would put that I was a comedian and that I wasn't because I kept, like, changing up to see because I'm like, oh, I want a man to know that I am funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

No, they don't want it. I would lie for the first three days and be like, oh, yeah, I'm in the entertainment business. I'm an actress.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Steph Tolev]

And then slowly wean them in this. The people who put that on there are liars. They want you to laugh at their jokes.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think. I agree. I think because to me, humor is important to me when I'm dating somebody. But I don't lead with that, because it's like, it's one of those things like, that is just either there or it isn't. Yes. And it's one of those things that you can't help. You just have to figure it out. Like, is somebody nice? Is somebody, you know, respectful? Like, these are. These are basic qualities that you will sniff out. And actually, humor, you'll probably pick out even faster than those other ones.

[Steph Tolev]

Way faster. That's the first one. On the first date, you can tell someone's funny or, like, you're a person always get along at all.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, totally. Totally. And so. And the other thing is, in a relationship, so much of being funny is like, it's. It's sort of like vibe specific. Like, things can be fun in the context of a relationship. Two people can make each other laugh and they're not funny at all.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

And that does. Being objective. In fact, sometimes I'm like, I. Sometimes I go back and forth because, like, women do like funny men. That is true. But also I'm jealous of the, like, people who aren't funny at all. If a girl's laughing at you, you know she likes you.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So if you start at I'm not funny and I get a laugh, I can definitely fuck this girl.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But for me, I'm like, well, they're gonna laugh at me because I'm funny. And some of them, that's enough to convince to want to fuck me. Some of them want to. Would have fucked me either way. But then there's some that are laughing due only to my incredible talents and have no desire to fuck me. Whereas, like, like, I get laughs in a way that it. So like, sometimes I think about how that can be, like, a slight detriment where you're like. Because if you're unfunny and you get a laugh, you're golden.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I'm not sure. I'm not sure what my. My laugh is not. These are different younger times in my life when I was more insecure. Now I'm like, what? Whatever. But humor is very. So, like, objective. Objectively being funny, I don't think. Especially the guys who put that on their dating.

[Steph Tolev]

No. And I feel like this exact type of guy is like that Andrew Tate kind of guy who's like, it does want to right away say something.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right.

[Steph Tolev]

So offensive and see, like, oh, but I'm. That I know. Well, I feel like what her problem is and what mine was. You're on the apps for too long and you start going cuckoo crazy. And you know, these guys that are stuck on here, they're left in here. They're bad people. They're not nice people. They're bad guys.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, if you're alone long enough to start. Start noticing ethnographic trends and like. Yeah, like to have. You know what I mean, where she's figured out what this means.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, she has.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a problem.

[Steph Tolev]

It is a problem. And I feel so. I'm so sorry for you because it's. It's hell out there, and I. I don't know what to tell you. Try to suck a. I don't know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, give it a whirl. But this is. This does go hand in hand with thinking. This is almost like the male version of the last question. Where was a woman saying she's funny because she picks out memes? A man saying he wants a funny woman is a guy. He's. He's pretending he's funny. He's basically saying, I'm so funny, I need someone. It's like, no, you're not.

[Steph Tolev]

No, you're not.

[Stavros Halkias]

And if you, like, you'd find you would. A woman with a sense of humor, you would end up with one if you were actually funny.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because there's no way. There's no way I could be with somebody who doesn't have. They don't have to be funny, but they have to have a good sense of humor.

[Steph Tolev]

There's no way.

[Stavros Halkias]

You wouldn't.

[Steph Tolev]

There's no way. All you do is make people laugh and you come home and your girlfriend's like, staring at you. There's no way.

[Stavros Halkias]

In my own home. Are you kidding me? I'm taking juggling classes to get a rise out of this. No juggling.

[Steph Tolev]

Three breakfast hot dogs. No laugh.

[Stavros Halkias]

Taking a bite out of each one.

[Steph Tolev]

Goes all the way down just staring at you.

[Stavros Halkias]

So anyway, that's interesting. You know, I like this call. This caller came in with some nice. Some nice observations.

[Steph Tolev]

Yeah, she's sounds. She sounds great. She sounds like she is funny, actually.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Good luck out there.

[Steph Tolev]

Yes, please.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, perfect. Eldis wanted to create discourse. So again, he literally waited for the. For the episode. We will. We said and we agreed with the guest. We will bank the longest he waited for the one that will come out months from now to start a lively discussion on the episode that came out last week. Yes, beautiful. Producing as always, always ongoing discourse.

[C]

Mind for the big picture on these evergreen topics.

[Steph Tolev]

Evergreen topics.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, folks, go listen. Check us out on tires. See Steph special on. On this date on this place.

[Steph Tolev]

Place.

[Stavros Halkias]

I guess maybe we've announced the fall dates for the. For the Dreamboat tour by now. I'm not sure.

[Steph Tolev]

Or.

[Stavros Halkias]

Depending on the tire schedule, we'll have. We'll either have released the fall dates or we won't have them out either. Maybe we've released some. We actually. We've probably released the European tour dates now.

[Steph Tolev]

Wow. There's got a lot going on.

[Stavros Halkias]

A lot going on.

[Steph Tolev]

Wait, can I plug my podcast?

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course. Of course.

[Steph Tolev]

Deaf infection. Please, God, you gotta come do it. Oh, my God. It's all about body stuff. It's gross. You'd love it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes, please. I will do it the next time I'm there. So listen to the pod, watch the special, watch Ty, and come see us live wherever we're playing. Thanks, guys. See you next time.

[Steph Tolev]

Bye.

[Stavros Halkias]

McCrispy strips are now at McDonald's. I hope you're ready for the most dippable chicken in McDonald's history. Dip it in all the sauce. Sauces. Dip it in that hot sauce in your bag. Dip it in your McFlurry. Your dip is your business. McCrispy strips at McDonald's.