#177 - Mandal

Summary

Stavvy’s World #177 – Mandal (April 20, 2026)

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Episode Overview

On this special 420 edition of Stavvy’s World, comedian Stavros Halkias welcomes returning favorite Mandal for an epic, stoned, and surprisingly philosophical hang. The duo riff on everything from donut shop geopolitics to the nature of desire, legacy, and self-improvement, fielding listener questions that range from snitchy teens to sexual ergonomics to the psychology of weight loss. As always, expect plenty of laughs, some heartfelt wisdom (in their own words), and deep-cut pastry debates.

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Main Themes

• Celebrating 4/20 and Donut Culture: Jointly appreciating America's donut diversity while navigating stoner traditions and regional specialties.
• Ethnic Entrepreneurship: Origins of LA’s Cambodian donut shops and parallels in immigrant-founded businesses.
• Body Image, Transformation & Self-Improvement: Debates on leg-lengthening surgery, the motivations for getting ripped, and fat representation.
• Legacy, Attention, and Content Creation: The folly of chasing numerical validation—whether through health tech, podcasts, or virality.
• Friendship, Loyalty, and Directness: Philosophical takes on snitching, group bonds, and the value of honest communication.
• Dessert Hierarchies: A fat comic’s tournament of cakes—and the quest for the perfect red velvet.

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Key Discussion Points & Notable Moments

1. 4/20 Rituals, Donuts, and Regional Rivalries

• [01:02-02:03] The episode opens with sincere stoner banter (“…it’s 4:20. Of course, dude.”) and clowning about staying up to partake (“When it’s 4:20, I set the alarm for 12am and I wake up and I smoke weed and I listen to Sublime.” – Stavros [01:29]).
• [01:46-02:11] Mandel introduces Atlanta’s Sublime Donuts, sparking debate on America’s best donut city (LA, Atlanta) and the ethnic roots of donut shops.
• [02:13-02:32] “It was actually a Cambodian dude who…came to California…worked for this donut shop…he worked so long…the dude taught him how to buy one. And then…set them up. He would set them up with donuts.”—Mandel

2. Fat Comic Solidarity, Identity & Representation

• [04:47-05:12] The pair reflect on benefiting from Stavvy’s plus-size fanbase:
  • “No, we’re an incubator for plus-size talent here at Stavi’s World. That’s our vertical…Fat identity cuts across all lines.” – Stavi [04:48]
  • Mandel: “That means so much to me, bro. ‘Cause I be in the comic club, I’m like, y’all gotta cut the capacity in half if I’m gonna get involved.” [05:01]

3. Geopolitical Bracketology

• [05:24-07:24] Wild, tongue-in-cheek riff on global power rankings (China as a basketball #1 seed; ‘the U.S. as the “Great Satan” in Iran’), skepticism of Youtube geostrategy analysis, and comedians’ responsibility for hot takes:
  • “Unfortunately…the only culture…the only export is podcasting and AI brain rot characters.” – Stavi [08:17]

4. The Great Leg-Lengthening Debate

• [13:58-16:53] Mandel waxes poetic about “leg extension surgery” to enhance his game (“One year away, bro. One year away, and now it’s doo-doo-doo-doo…fly like an eagle.”), listing wild post-surgery basketball aspirations despite never having dunked and a checkered athletic record.
• [17:31-20:02] Scenes from Mandel’s hypothetical “cocoon-to-butterfly” art project to dunk, with Stavi egging him on.

5. Brian Johnson & Techbro Immortality

• [23:11-27:00] Brian Johnson—“pale skin dude deaging himself”—is roasted for bizarre longevity tactics, including “measuring hardness against his teenage son”:
  • “He looks kind of just like he’s become kind of gay, which is cool.” – Stavi [23:51]
  • "He’s like, all that matters is your body…no enjoyment.” [25:00s]
• [27:45-29:58] A deep segment on the emptiness of legacy and the absurdity of striving to be remembered (“Legacy is the dumbest shit of all time. One generation, you will be forgotten…”) and the difference between eudaimonia (enjoyment) and obsession with achievement.

6. Desire, Self-Improvement & The Human Condition

• [31:00-38:00] The pod veers philosophical: Are we just our bodies? Is improving yourself for numbers/optics empty? The guys unpack Gen Z’s objectification, the seeking of numeric validation (“Commodified attention…” – Mandel [32:24]), and challenge the value of obsession over simply enjoying life.
• [36:13-37:13] Mandel: “I feel like once we start making, I think we have to get back to having…finding value in the things that we do every day instead of the result.”
• [37:32-38:33] Stavi: “It’s the classic—the journey is more important than…thing. Which I’ve been thinking about a lot.”

7. Fat Desserts: Donuts, Red Velvet, and the Tournament

• [39:59-47:47] Extended pastry ruminations lead to the invention of an inter-podcast “Tournament of Cakes.”
  • Mandel argues for red velvet as the ultimate dessert: “A good red velvet cake—really…never been chocolate. People always say it’s chocolate. It’s not chocolate.” [43:40]
  • Hilarious story of a friend eating so much red velvet he mistook his stool for blood and went to the ER [41:05-43:15].
• [49:32-51:07] The dream: Fat comedian Avengers across multiple podcasts, each entering their signature dessert, debating “average vs. elite” in food ranking, culminating in a mega-episode.

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Advice Call Highlights

Snitching Teen Daughter ([60:40-71:04])

• Listener’s Problem: His 15-year-old daughter wants to narc on a friend for vaping; dad’s horrified she’s a “cop.”
• Advice:
  • Mandel: “It’s gotta take the approach of preaching the loyalty between the friendship…that has more value than whatever the rule that she’s trying to enforce.” [62:27]
  • Stavi: “Without question, I would rather have the kid vaping than the kid trying to figure out how to report her friend. Dude, you raised a dork, and that’s okay…” [62:00]
• Both: Encourage loyalty, open communication, and learning to handle small issues without bringing in authority, while affirming the parent-child bond is strong because she confides in him.

Aggro Cowgirl & Bedside Diplomacy ([72:58-81:27])

• Listener’s Problem: Girlfriend’s rough “riding” is physically painful; dude doesn’t want to ruin her best position, but the situation is, uh, dangerous.
• Advice:
  • Stavi: “You have the key to your girl busting…many would kill to be in your position…the way she busts, you gotta figure something out here.” [78:02]
  • Don’t try to trade it for more anal (“No, brother, this is not a fair trade.” [74:40]); open communication is key.
  • Suggest ergonomic solutions (pillow, bracing), confirm erections are up to par, and separate his requests for varied activities.

“Platonic” Road Trip with a Secret Crush ([86:23-102:08])

• Listener’s Problem: He’s 5’7”, 300 pounds, depressed, unmotivated, can’t quit weed, and scheduled for an outdoorsy Scotland trip with a woman (with whom, despite denying it, he’s obviously in love).
• Advice:
  • Stavi: Call yourself out! “Admit yourself, all you want to do is fuck this woman…start drilling in the pussy energy well.” [88:53]
  • Use romantic desire as initial (but dirty) motivation to get in better shape, even if it’s not pure or sustainable.
  • Mandel: “At some point you have to put some value in wanting to lose weight or be healthier for yourself…that’s more sustainable…” [91:21]
  • Focus on “Squirtle Squad” energy: self-worth, incremental self-improvement, and confidence—“You need to be who you are now, but just more confident.” [95:32]
  • Don’t confess feelings immediately; vibe it out and be honest by the end of the trip if appropriate.

Wedding Invite Snub ([102:43-110:57])

• Listener’s Problem: Didn’t get invited to a friend’s wedding after changing his phone and email. Should he “fish around” for a possible mix-up?
• Advice:
  • Mandel: “I mean, leave it alone…You gotta let it be…put more into the relationships that you see a more fruitful bond with.” [104:39/110:13]
  • Stavi: “If you changed your number a year ago and he didn’t realize until it was time for his wedding, that’s kind of a bad sign, man.” [104:53]
  • If you do dig for info, brace for the probability that you just weren’t as close as you thought; beware potential embarrassment.

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Best Quotes & Memorable Exchanges

• Stavi on Modern Culture:
  “Our only export is podcasting and AI brain rot characters.” [08:17]

• Mandel on Attention Culture:
  “I think people commodified attention. You have a numeric value…consistently trying to win that as a game.” [32:24]

• Stavi on Life’s Pleasures:
  “All the most beautiful things in life will destroy you.” [28:19]

• Mandel on Self-Worth:
  “You gotta put that value in yourself…that I want the best version of me because I deserved it.” [92:20]

• Stavi, fat comic philosopher:
  “Everybody, you know, you’re fucking Squirtles right now. You can be fucking Blastoise…You gotta evolve over time.” [94:05]

• Red velvet war:
  “People always say it’s chocolate. It’s not chocolate. Y’all haven’t tasted chocolate cake.” – Mandel [43:40]

• On plus-size representation:
  “We’re an incubator for plus size talent here at Stavi’s World…Fat identity cuts across all lines.” [04:48]

• Dessert bracket brainstorming:
  “We might have to do all fat…Fat November or fat December…” [47:29]

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Notable Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |--------------|------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:02-02:32 | Donut culture: Atlanta vs. L.A., ethnic donut history | | 05:24-07:24 | Geopolitical brackets, podcasting as “culture” | | 13:58-20:02 | Leg-lengthening as transformation—basketball delusions, art project | | 23:11-29:58 | Brian Johnson, legacy, immortality & enjoying life | | 32:24-37:13 | Attention economy, obsession vs. fulfillment | | 39:59-47:47 | Red velvet cake debate & origin story | | 60:40-71:04 | Advice: Snitching teen daughter vs. loyalty, growing up | | 72:58-81:27 | Advice: Rough riding & honest bedroom communication | | 86:23-102:08 | Advice: Fat, unmotivated caller and the real motivations for change | | 102:43-110:57| Advice: Wedding invite snub—when your friendship isn’t top tier |

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Episode Takeaways

• Be Honest—with yourself and others: Whether it’s about romantic motivations, your own bad habits, or why you weren’t invited, honesty is the best start.
• Value Connection over Rules: In friendships, community, and even while parenting, mentorship and loyalty trump tattling or numeric validation.
• Enjoy Life’s Simple Pleasures: Sometimes a donut, a walk, or a day with friends is the best there is.
• Change Happens Slowly: You won’t transform overnight, but small improvements—and the right motivation—make a big difference.
• Don’t Get Lost in the Algorithm: Social or cultural validation is fleeting; fulfillment comes from the journey and the everyday.

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Closing

Mandel plugs:

• Big Fun Network on YouTube
• “Big Biz” and “Finding Out” w/ Rob Hayes

Next Time: Mark Normand joins Stavvy’s World for more shenanigans.

Final Word:
Happy 420. Enjoy your dessert, remember to legalize it, and keep it honest on and off the (pastry) court.

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“We’re enjoying ourselves—or trying to anyway.” – Stavi [29:58]

Transcript

[Stavi]

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[Mandel]

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[Stavi]

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[Mandel]

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[Stavi]

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[Mandel]

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[Stavi]

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[Mandel]

visit dish.com terms and conditions apply.

[Stavi]

Welcome, everybody, to Stav's World 904-800-ST Call in. We'll solve your problems. We're here on this epic ass 420. As we all know, it's 420 right now. Legalize it. Yep. What's up?

[Mandel]

Oh, it's 420.

[Stavi]

It's 420. Of course, dude, you know.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I knew that. Absolutely knew that.

[Stavi]

We're recording this at 4:00am at 4:20, and we're putting it out at 6:00am on 4:20.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

Because, you know, I don't know about you, dude. I set. When it's 4:20, I set the alarm for 12am and I wake up and I smoke weed and I listen to Sublime.

[Mandel]

That's hard.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

And you know something? I don't smoke weed, but I do that same thing anyway.

[Stavi]

Just listen to Sublime.

[Mandel]

Listen to Sublime, Eat Sublime Donuts. They got Sublime Donuts up here. No.

[Stavi]

What are Sublime Donuts?

[Mandel]

In Atlanta, it's a place called Sublime Donuts.

[Stavi]

Okay. Because I thought it was an L A thing. Because they have a. I will give LA some credit. They have a great donut culture.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

I didn't know Atlanta had it too. That's awesome.

[Mandel]

The LA one is the best one. They have the Cambodians.

[Stavi]

It's. Yeah, it's always an. An ethnic group. That's just so good. They nail one thing.

[Mandel]

You ever seen that documentary about it?

[Stavi]

No.

[Mandel]

So it was a. It was actually a dude. It was a Cambodian dude who, like, I think like refugee who came to. To California and worked for this donut shop.

[Stavi]

Hell, yes.

[Mandel]

And then he worked so long that the dude taught him how to buy one. And then so when people came from Cambodia, just set him up. He would, like, set them up with donuts.

[Stavi]

Awesome. I love that shit. That's how like. Like a lot of, like, Jersey motels. It's Indian families because they would just, like, live in the three rooms and run the rest of it. And they're like. They would just bring. It's fucking genius.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Greek people just fucking. We run diners and then we. We teach no skills to upcoming generations and then we get into the arts. That's basically how it goes. Greek people really don't have, like, Vietnamese people. Apparently was one lady after Vietnam that showed, like, 20 Vietnamese women how to do nails. Like one. One, like, rich lady who felt bad for them for being refugees and just. I think she was famous. I don't remember who the fuck. And maybe we even talked about it on this podcast. Have we, elders? Why am I asking you? You don't. Fuck. You have no fucking idea. You're so bad at your job. Does that ring any bells to you?

[Eldis]

Kind of. Did we just talk about it recently? No. Who are we talking? Well, who's a celeb?

[Stavi]

We said it was. I think we said the wrong celeb. I think somebody said Marilyn Monroe, and it wasn't her.

[Mandel]

That would be crazy.

[Stavi]

But it was somebody who was. And God forbid you fucking Google it.

[Eldis]

It's what's. It was a Jane Fonda.

[Stavi]

It wasn't Jane Fonda because Jane Fonda was out there on the tanks. Jane Fonda was looking awesome, dude. She was like, I'm with the Vietnamese. Which I get right now. Dude, I. Let me not. You know, Mandel's got. His career's coming up. I don't want to fucking. I don't want to say how I feel about geopolitics right now, but let's just say I see where Jane Fonda was coming from.

[Mandel]

Listen, man, one thing for sure, bro.

[Stavi]

And when you say Mandela's on the podcast, man, we started talking about donuts. We'll get back to it, man, because I do. We're about to go to Atlanta. We've been to Atlanta. We were just in Atlanta. As we all know, it's 4:20. But I'm interested about these donuts, man.

[Mandel]

Thank you all for having me on the program again.

[Stavi]

Of course, dude.

[Mandel]

I'mma be honest with you. I. I been on the program twice, went on the road. Lot of the tickets were people from this program.

[Caller 1]

And.

[Mandel]

And I'mma say I can't eyeball them. Before they say it. Before they say it, I'm like, I know what you seen me.

[Stavi]

I think I have a hunch.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think that's cool, man.

[Stavi]

That's beautiful, man.

[Mandel]

I appreciate that.

[Stavi]

No, we're. We're an incubator for plus size talent here at Stavi'.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

You know, that's. That's our vertical. People don't really think about it that way. But across all lines. Fat there. A fat identity cuts across all lines, man.

[Mandel]

That means so much, much to me, bro. Cause I be in the comic club, I'm like, y' all got to cut the capacity in half if I'm gonna get involved with it. Yeah, man.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

That junk is cool, bro. Yeah, you right though, man. We gonna lose this junk to Iran, though.

[Stavi]

Oh, yeah.

[Mandel]

I don't know if I'm supposed to say that.

[Stavi]

I know, I know. It is crazy to just be like, I'm rooting for.

[Mandel]

It's a weird thing.

[Stavi]

They're the. It's. It's like we're. It's. You know, March madness just finished up. There are 16 seed that's hanging with the one seed right now. You know what I mean? You know, maybe 16 is unfair because we're not a one seed anymore. We're a two seed. So there are 15.

[Mandel]

But you know what's odd?

[Stavi]

China's definitely the one seed. It's one bracket. Yeah, we'll do this through the. Through college basketball.

[Mandel]

But you know what's odd to me, though?

[Stavi]

What's that?

[Mandel]

When you go on YouTube, every Xbox expert is like, hey, man, this is looking bad for the u. S. And I'm like, I know somebody told them that before the YouTube man knew.

[Stavi]

No, I don't think they did. No way.

[Mandel]

This information got to me before them.

[Stavi]

I really don't think they did, dude.

[Mandel]

I mean, it's mountains, man.

[Stavi]

They're like, let's go, dude. Yeah, they're like, yeah, we're gonna show them after. You know, people are saying he's getting. He gets black dominatrixes. That. That's his thing that he let the drunk secretary of defense. You got, you know, Lindsey Graham being secretly gay. I think they were all kind of hopped up. They're on a. They're on a. They're on a heater. I mean, we've all been there. When you think you and your boys can fuck somebody up easily and then you end up getting your ass kicked. I don't think. Look, unfortunately, I don't think the great Satan, AKA the US is going to lose in Iran. I think hopefully we get the fuck out of there quick. You know, it's 420. Hopefully they blow a nice, maybe fucking Trump and then you Ayatollah gotta smoke weed on 4 20. OK, listen, I'm against podcasters having Trump on their show, but if the Ayatollah and Trump will sit down on Stavi's World and smoke weed, maybe we have to put them on Kush Brothers. We'll put that episode behind the paywall, ok? Because it's not about views. I'm not cynically inviting Trump and the new Ayatollah on for views. I'm doing it to heal. Because as we all know, podcasters, when they get involved in politics, it always ends out good. It always ends up really good.

[Mandel]

And you know, I thought about that. As I said my little take there, I was like, man, I have such a small knowledge. Of course I'm basing everything I'm saying off of three videos.

[Stavi]

That's fine, dude.

[Mandel]

No literature.

[Stavi]

Sometimes it's vibes and the vibes are bad here.

[Mandel]

And I got to realize, bro, people got to process. My, my, my position in this world is to just throw stuff out.

[Stavi]

Of course, of course, of course.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying? There shouldn't be no yeah, yeah, nobody.

[Stavi]

I feel like, don't hold me to account.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, it should be loose up

[Stavi]

until you get a big enough audience where you can change the course of things. Yes, a comedian should be able to say the most ridiculous shit of all time. Unfortunately, the world has gotten so bad that there is no other media that has control of anything other than, I guess, Mr. Beast and like the Italian AI characters. Yeah, I feel like the fucking little wooden bat and the fuck, you know, I feel like those characters and pot podcasters are now like, you know, like fucking Clark Gable or some shit. They're just like that, like, like fucking. That's just our, that's, that's our only culture, that's our only export is podcasting and AI brain rot characters.

[Mandel]

And can I say something I appreciate about you. I'm glad that you the steals on YouTube. YouTube ain't got that big shine on it. I hate the big shine on the YouTube.

[Stavi]

That's only cuz Eldis doesn't know how to do it, I'm sure.

[Eldis]

What do you mean the big shine?

[Mandel]

Like when you go on like a famous YouTuber, when you look at the steel photo, they, they got that, that AI shine on it.

[Eldis]

Oh, like that. Super. Yeah.

[Stavi]

Yeah, like it's lit in a weird way. It's artificially lit. I'm sure Elders would love to do some outof fashion.

[Eldis]

I've personally made a few of those where I really crank that contrast.

[Stavi]

Of course you have. Yeah, of course you have. And it is. That is your role in the organization is to have someone with the lowest common denominator of taste. Because you would be fudgeing watching Mr. If you. Dude, if you were live right now, you would be the dumbest person of all time. How much you. How much you just have just supplicated yourself to AI.

[Eldis]

All I think about when I do this podcast when we're picking the clips is what would I chuckle at while I'm taking a shit on the toilet? And I let that guide my taste for everything we put out.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

And what's big, bright and shiny looking.

[Stavi]

Yeah, you know, that's fine. We don't have to talk about your fucking. Your media strategy. Elders. Let's get back to these donuts.

[Mandel]

Yeah, this. But that's a mastermind at work, though.

[Stavi]

It's really not Mandel, I promise you. He is not a mastermind at all. And he's barely at work. It's a middle mind. It's a middle mind occasionally working.

[Eldis]

I'm the execs that have to, you know, show the creatives the way.

[Stavi]

You're not an exec. You're my underling. Let's make that very clear. There's a clear hierarchy in this organization with you. You're barely in that. You're. You're just. You're in this C suite because it's a function of. We have almost no employees.

[Mandel]

He do get on a collar shirt, though.

[Stavi]

He does. And by the way, every editor that we hire is so much more crucial to our fucking. They could learn your job so fast. You should be fucking sweating when we get in the office. Because once I start talking to people who actually have technical ability at this dude, you're fucked. You're going to be fucking. You're going to be the janitor at the new office, dude. You're going to get a demotion.

[Eldis]

I get under the hood, man. Sometimes the boss has to roll his sleeves up and do the boss.

[Stavi]

You're not the boss.

[Mandel]

The manager.

[Stavi]

There we go. I'll give you that. You are a middle manager. That is what you were always meant do to. To do anyway.

[Mandel]

He has such a Zen approach to.

[Stavi]

He does. No, no, I. I do envy Eldest is that. That's why our. That is honestly why Our friendship works because if Eldis was even a little irritable, we're fucked. Yeah. We need to like, that's the plus. That's the plus. That's what cut. That's the. The. The silver lining that comes with someone who is not reactive at all. You know what I mean? Eldest is never ahead of the curve. He's never affected. He will do what he was tasked to do, even if it's stupid. Clearly. You should pivot.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

He's never going to do that. But that's positive. That has its positives.

[Eldis]

I'm in the cut man. I'm ready for action. But, you know, never. Never.

[Stavi]

You're really not, though. You're one of the least ready for action guys of all time.

[Mandel]

But that's because he above six feet, bro.

[Stavi]

That's true.

[Mandel]

When you talk very tall. Anytime I talk at. It's like we like. Whoa.

[Stavi]

That's a good point.

[Mandel]

Put him in the cage.

[Stavi]

There is actually a type of. Obviously. Look, I have no sympathy for the tall. They have.

[Mandel]

I'm with you.

[Stavi]

They have the easiest lives of all time. We on the same page 100%. One of the. It is the equivalent like a woman can be hot in like a hundred ways. If we're being realistic, tall is the overall, like trump card.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

In. In terms of male attractiveness. Because some women just want a giant, you know, homunculus to make them look small and feel small.

[Mandel]

And let me say this. That junk is rational.

[Stavi]

Rational looking for a tall man.

[Mandel]

It is rational.

[Stavi]

Evolutionary. You mean like. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

Like on some. Like on some. Like, if we all going to war.

[Stavi]

Protect. Yes.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying? If you wanted somebody who could see the.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

See above the crowd now, you could

[Stavi]

argue you could get a spear right through your fucking big, big, huge, tall head by being above the crowd.

[Mandel]

Yeah. But I'm saying I think that. I think the guns or whatever ain't coming in the DNA, you know, we built around.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah. The thing I know you mean. I think it's purely become symbolic.

[Mandel]

Okay.

[Stavi]

Because no chance is elders who you want to take you through the fucking forest. You know what I mean? Like elders is bonking his head on fucking. On branches. You know what I mean? He's. He's also like tripping easily. It's the bigger they are, the harder they fall. If we're being honest. You want. If we're. Now we're just like. If I was a woman in the. In the medieval times, who would I let me. I think I Would look for something closer to six feet.

[Eldis]

I like how the options are our three bodies.

[Stavi]

No, we aren't even discussing us yet.

[Mandel]

I would get the leg extension.

[Stavi]

You would get the leg extension surgery.

[Mandel]

I will get it, bro.

[Stavi]

I don't know.

[Mandel]

I seen.

[Stavi]

The recovery is crazy.

[Mandel]

But once I seen the video of the dude doing a crossover and he did that big jump. You see.

[Stavi]

I know the guy with the dress. Yeah.

[Mandel]

He got up, he did this.

[Stavi]

Yeah, that's. That was big. That was big. That was big for the leg. For the leg extension community. Because you could argue until then it was about still. It looked like they were on still for sure. And still the recovery is crazy.

[Mandel]

I'm not.

[Stavi]

It's like a year. It's like a year of your life.

[Mandel]

But one year away, bro. One year away. And now it's doo, doo, doo, doo. Yeah, fly like an eagle.

[Stavi]

Well, you're not playing. You're never playing hoops.

[Mandel]

Absolutely. The excuse I had always had at not being good at basketball was the fact that I'm short.

[Stavi]

So you think in your mid-30s, you've been fat your whole life, you get bigger shins, it will immediately allow you to play hoops.

[Mandel]

Yes, yes. I'm going to the LA Fitness immediately after recovery. I'm going straight to LA Fitness. I'm. I'm dunking on cats. I'm ducking on cats.

[Stavi]

I don't know about this plan, dude.

[Mandel]

I'm crossing somebody up.

[Stavi]

Did you play. What's the highest stage of organized basketball?

[Mandel]

You played wreck ball? When I was 8, I played no 8 or 9. No, 9. 9. Rick Ball at 9. 9 and 10 years old.

[Stavi]

9 and 10. That's just when they start dribbling. Right? Cuz I feel like I've seen.

[Mandel]

I mean, it's Atlanta dribbling.

[Stavi]

That's.

[Mandel]

But what I'm saying is. What I'm saying is you put that ball in my hand today, it's a lot of. The goal is farther away from.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

I'm six one, six two.

[Stavi]

Okay.

[Mandel]

I'm windmill dunk.

[Stavi]

You think six two. You get windmill at six two.

[Mandel]

What? I'm throwing it off the backboard.

[Stavi]

Steph, I believe, is 6:3, right? Steph Curry, one of the greatest athletes of all time. He focused on 6:3 and he doesn't dunk that much.

[Mandel]

He focused on the shoot aspect. I'm going.

[Stavi]

How old is Steph right now? He's probably 35. 36, 38.

[Mandel]

Oh, wow.

[Stavi]

Steph's 38. Okay, so Steph hasn't dunked In, I believe it's been. I think it was like. See, the last time he dunked, I think it was like a couple seasons ago. He dunked in game. And again, that's one of the greatest athletes of all time. And you're how old right now, Mandel?

[Mandel]

I'm 32.

[Stavi]

32. Okay, so you're six years younger. Let's say you have some commitments. Let's say you don't get to the leg lengthening surgery until, I don't know, the end of this year.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Let's just say top of next year to just be safe. Right. So January 27th. So January 28th, you're fully healed. Right. At that point you would be. That's two years. So you'd be 34. And you have again been very fat your whole life.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Stavi]

And unathletic.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

And so you would be four years younger than Steph Curry is right now. And Elvis, when was the last time he dunked in game?

[Eldis]

Last time he dunked was March 2025 against the Sixers. But the time before that was February 21, 2019.

[Stavi]

Right. So Steph, when he was your age, was not dunking in the NBA. But you think, you think in two years time you'd be able to windmill dunk with a leg extension surgery.

[Mandel]

Now, let me. I've got all that information.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

You thinking as a. As I am with a 5, 6 brain.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

You don't realize that once I get that 6, 2 brain, metabolically. Metabolically, I'm gonna be in a different place.

[Stavi]

Okay.

[Mandel]

Steph chose to use his powers towards shooting. When I get my new set of powers.

[Stavi]

Right, right, right, right.

[Mandel]

It's time to jail.

[Stavi]

Yeah. You're six, six, Right. When's the last time you dunked?

[Eldis]

I've never dunked it.

[Stavi]

Interesting.

[Mandel]

He using his power for YouTube.

[Stavi]

He's not, though. That's another thing. That's another bad example. He's got plenty of power left over. This has never used his full power at anything.

[Eldis]

I gotta, I gotta conserve the brain power to get these clips off to get that contrast right.

[Mandel]

He using his dim phalanges, he typing all type of stuff.

[Eldis]

I can reach the Y, the P key with my pinky.

[Stavi]

Wow, that's huge.

[Mandel]

Because think about a proportionate goal right now. If you. What's this about seven feet right here?

[Stavi]

I would say. Yeah, let's say it is.

[Mandel]

I do windmill on this right now.

[Stavi]

You would dunk on the seven footer?

[Mandel]

I could. I could windmill this right now. If you add a foot to me, right? Then I'm doing it on a regular goal.

[Stavi]

That's eight feet.

[Mandel]

No, it feels better. It's a multiplier. It's a multiplier on the. On the. On the leg strength.

[Stavi]

Listen, man, I'm with you. I would love to get the leg lengthening, but it's just the. You know, the. The recovery is too much. You know, one year for y'. All. Where you fucked up is you were. You were coveting basketball players growing up. You should have immediately. You didn't play football.

[Mandel]

No, I play.

[Stavi]

You got to be a lineman, man. You got to be in the trenches, dude.

[Mandel]

I was. I was a defensive. I was.

[Stavi]

Me, too.

[Mandel]

I was defensive.

[Stavi]

I was at. Oh, defensive end. I was a nose tackle.

[Mandel]

Yeah. Oh, that's hard right there.

[Stavi]

Right in front of the center, dude. You know, that's where you fucked up. You're trying to fly right now. You're like a. You're a. You're like. You're a fucking dude. You're not a sky type. You're a rock type, dude. You're fucking geodude, bro.

[Mandel]

You're trying to be up there, limit our scientific advances. You get what I'm saying? Once I get the bread up under

[Stavi]

me, you would be a marvel if. From now. Right. And let's give you the benefit of the doubt. You're getting ready for the surgery.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

You're probably gonna get in the zone, you know, you're gonna get your diet right. Maybe we'll get some. We'll get some steroids going.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

You know, we're gonna get some tea going. So you're gonna get more. So I.

[Mandel]

It.

[Stavi]

It actually would be an incredible art project to dedicate your life to dunking one time.

[Mandel]

That's what I'm saying.

[Stavi]

I actually. I have now shifted, and instead of this being a stupid dream for a fat man who. Who's coveted height his whole life, now as an artist, to say, can I transform? Can I. We've talked about the. We like to talk about the metaphorical cocoon here. Right. And to come out as a butterfly.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

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[Mandel]

And think about that eight inches. You seen that? You seen that dude on YouTube? I know you be on YouTube. That dude with. With. With that. With that pale skin who de aging

[Stavi]

himself, you know I'm talking about, of course, Brian Johnson.

[Eldis]

Brian Johnson?

[Mandel]

Yeah, him.

[Stavi]

Y'.

[Mandel]

All. Y' all know that dude?

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah. We don't know him personally. No, no, we'd love Brian if you're listening. We'd love to have you on. He would love to have you on.

[Mandel]

He drinking his son blood.

[Stavi]

Yep. Of course, we talked about that quite a bit. I think he's not. Not only that, I believe. Yeah. He's mentioned measuring his hardness against his teenage son's hardness, which is a wild, wild type of science to be doing, to be putting. I assume it's like a fucking blood pressure cuff that you put around your son's penis and be like, yep, my shit's getting as hard as my son's dick now.

[Mandel]

Think about this. He aging himself like this.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

Right.

[Stavi]

I don't think it's working, by the way. He looks like he looks bad. He looks kind of just like he's become kind of gay, which is cool. Which is a funny thing for a tech guy to look like. But it's the glassiness of his skin that's weird to me.

[Mandel]

Yeah, the skin is hanging off.

[Stavi]

The skeleton's not looking good.

[Mandel]

It's not tied enough. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

And maybe that's a. Maybe that is a tone thing, but he looks unwell. Like, he looks. Maybe it's all the algae, because he looks a little green. Have you seen what he eats? Yeah, it's like a algae, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It looks like maybe it's turning him less, you know, less vital, less. And look, I know Brian's watching this. He's like, these guys are gonna die. They're fat as shit. Yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

We're setting ourselves up because how old is he?

[Stavi]

Brian Johnson? He's in his 50s. But yeah, we are definitely.

[Mandel]

You know, we're setting ourselves up. Cause they gonna look at us. They go look at us and be like. We would say that we're haters, et cetera. We too fake.

[Stavi]

But that's why I would love to have him on, because it's. And honestly, for that matter, somebody like. Although Brian Johnson at least is a. An adult with a fully formed brain, somebody like that kid. Clavicular. I would love to have, like a Lincoln Douglas debate about the way you look at the way you look at yourself versus, like, we would be the two sides of. Of, like, how to live your life. Because he's like, all that matters is your body. All that matters is no enjoyment. He's sort of like an even more. Like Brian Johnson at least has this thing where clearly. Have you seen a picture of him when he was. When he was like. Because he. What was he like PayPal or some bullshit or some. Some tech shit? He made A so much money. And you look at a picture of him back then, he just looks like a schlubby shitty engineer in some ways. He's doing what you're discussing. Except for him because he's a fucking, you know, dork tech dickhead. Who they have to be. They, they, they have to care about legacy, which is like nobody. Legacy is the dumbest shit of all time. One generation, you will be forgotten. You need to be the greatest of all. Like you need the greatest of at your thing to get four generations.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Like, dude, just now people are talking about like Caleb, what's his face from the Bears. He wanted to, he wanted to trademark the nickname Iceman, which is something no one's ever called him. He did it himself. And George Gervin is the Iceman. He's a fucking legendary, you know, one of the fucking coolest players of his generation. Nobody fucking like we're in our 30s. We sort of know him. We sort of know him from like, if you're a hoops fan, you're aware of him. NBA street, all the legend stuff from, from 2K. That's how you kind of keep in touch. Kids now don't have any fucking clue. And that guy was awesome.

[Mandel]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavi]

And that's not that long ago. I bet you kids don't know who like Dr. J, for example, they don't know who the fuck. And that's the 70s to now. That's 50 years. Whatever people worry about legacy are fucking idiots. You will be forgotten, bro. There's like eight guys that randomly get remembered and they just got lucky. Jesus. You know, Julius Caesar, you know what I mean? Alexander the Great. You have to do so much and you honestly, to have legacy, you kind of have to be a sociopath. That's the only, the only people we remember from history are people who like fucking killed the most guys essentially. Anyway, clearly that's a guy. He, he wants to be remembered. He wants to still be a scientist, but ultimately he didn't want to be fat and he wanted to get pussy. That's really what it is from Brian Johnson. So Brian Johnson at least is like it's a nerd trying to be his version of like he won't admit hot, but I bet that has something to do with it. He's saying it's health and he wants to be remembered for being. For living forever. And it's this ego shit that he has to basically time travel. He thinks he's going to be around for 300 years.

[Caller 1]

Right?

[Stavi]

Insane. That's I at Least can I know where he's coming from. These kids, this kid, that kid K is like what, 22? He doesn't even know this. Just how he's always been.

[Mandel]

He's like, I don't know the kid.

[Stavi]

He's like. This kid smashes. He's 20. Jesus Christ. He's some kid who talks about, like, you. You have to look a certain way. You have to like. He's the kid who talking about looks maxing and all this other shit. And I think he's just honestly an autistic kid who's obsession is like looking good, but they have no joy in their lives.

[Mandel]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavi]

They don't know what it's like to eat a. To get fucking high and eat a pastry on a Sunday at 3pm after you've just spent the evening with a woman who doesn't respect you but has huge tits. They don't. They don't know how beautiful a day like that is. Watching a movie on your fucking T. Watching fucking, sewing on. I don't know, Cobra, for example. Throwing cobra on at an Airbnb, you know what I mean? Ordering pizza, getting some. Eating some pussy, even though it'll give you cervical cancer, apparently. Or you get cancer through the cervix or whatever the fuck Michael Douglas style they don't know. That's the beauty of life is you have to do things that will destroy you. All the most beautiful things in life will destroy you. And so anyway, I would love to have him on and. But that's my opposing philosophy is like, then you're not even living if all you're doing is fucking. You're in a fucking pod at 7pm because it's optimal to sleep from 7 to 4am and from fucking 4 to fucking 5, you're red light therapy or whatever. And listen, could I stand to adopt a little more of that style of life? Sure, yeah. That's not what we're talking about here. Everybody's like, stav's a fat piece of shit. I'm just saying. Not what happened to fucking the enjoyment meter. You know what I mean? Why isn't that part of like, why. Why isn't anybody trying to have a good time? That's what I don't fucking get. So anyway, yeah, I would love to have Brian Johnson on here. And yes, some will say we're being haters, but we're not. I think we're gentlemen that, like, you know, sure, we have prop. We have our issues, but we, we enjoy. We're enjoying ourselves or we're trying to anyway.

[Mandel]

Yeah, I agree. I think, I think that, I think that definitely you gotta have some balance. Like, I definitely think like you said I could pick up a salad a little more out there.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

Then I do.

[Stavi]

You could do a little. You could do. If your goal is to dunk instead of thinking about the. Maybe you could do a little, you

[Mandel]

know, could get a push up in every now and then, you know, a little here and there.

[Stavi]

But I do definitely think you can't

[Mandel]

be obsessed with trying to make things in your control. That's not.

[Stavi]

That's a great way to look at it. We have control over almost nothing.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

You could try your best, but you know, I think it could, it can get obsessive, you know.

[Stavi]

Yeah. You can't obsess. So. And ultimately, if we want to get philosophical, is the body even you? Are you the body? Are you a different essence? I think probably whatever your soul, whatever the fuck. I think it's probably brain. But there's an argument to be made that it's maybe it's not the brain at all, just some kind of. You're a ghost in. In your body. Is the body really what you are? That's the thing about some, like these young kids, it's like they just decided it's time to just purely objectify yourself. I guess that's the fucking. This is the logical conclusion to this much fucking. Growing up with consumerism and like all, you know, and, and, and trying to get attention. But it's like you used to get attention to try and get, to get people to fuck you. That's the, that's the, that's the beauty that maybe that's what it. Maybe we've gotten to. What, what has, what has alarmed me about these guys the most. Yeah. Is we have now completely taken that away. And to me that's. That's what has connected humanity from. I bet you the first time a motherfucker drew on a cave in like prehistoric France to, you know, me doing comedy, whatever. And to every. Mozart fucking guitar players, dancers, rappers, fucking even athletes, whatever, businessmen for that matter. Everything, everything has been done to get to. For almost like to improve your sexual currency. And these guys now have taken that out. It doesn't even seem like they like to get pussy. Well, it seems like they want other dudes to say they're fucking hot.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

You know what I mean?

[Mandel]

I feel like we commodify.

[Stavi]

Maybe they're gay, which is fine. If they were gay, I would respect it so much more yeah, but I don't think they are. Yeah, I think they just. But yes, yes. Attention.

[Mandel]

I think they commodified attention. I think that it was a thing. I think now it's like you. You have a numeric value.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, you have. That's a good point.

[Mandel]

And I think that what happened was now people. People are consistently trying to win that as a game of some sort.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

And the biggest thing I noticed was that with the YouTube or even with putting out content, where I kind of struggle with. In my. In my own career is that eventually you run out of stuff.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

Like, you're a person that runs out of things. And I've noticed whenever somebody runs out of things, they start reaching.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

And eventually when you reach long enough, you go find some trash.

[Stavi]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Mandel]

Like, hey, but I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure health man. What's my man name?

[Stavi]

Brian Johnson.

[Mandel]

I'm pretty sure he done. He done gave us all the information he could probably six months ago, I believe.

[Stavi]

I mean, I think he's really pivoted to. He had like a. You know, the girl was fine looking, a cute goth girlfriend. That was much. Not even goth. I think she just was a brunette. But there was like, a couple months ago, he just. He did, like, eat Taco Bell. Like, he pivoted to, oh, now I'm doing bad stuff now. And then he started doing, like, mushrooms and shit, which is at least interesting. But yes.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Eventually he. You're right. You run out of something. And yes, people, you can't keep going to that well when it's empty. It's fucking embarrassing.

[Mandel]

And I think, bro, I think. I think, like, we become a little insatiable with the attention. Like, we never have enough. It's always another thing that you could get. And so I think the only way to curb that is releasing yourself from that desire.

[Stavi]

Oh, yes. But I think that if you're speaking my language.

[Mandel]

But if you came up as a person where that was in the zy. Guys, too, always search for that in some capacity. You kind of just stuck in a loop, bro.

[Stavi]

Yeah, Yeah, I think that's what.

[Mandel]

I think a lot of young people were bestowed upon something, but they grew up in it.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

Where at least in our age bracket, we have some reality before that.

[Stavi]

Sure, sure.

[Mandel]

But if that's your entire thing, that's all you know.

[Stavi]

Yeah. I think we all grew up in the sort of, like, consumerism, the, like, dark side of the capitalist shit is that you just got to keep making money no matter what. You can't just. You can't just like have a profitable business.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

And just like, oh, I pay my bills. This is great. The whole idea of capitalism is you have to keep getting more and more. You have to destroy your enemies and you have to fucking. You have to be the only business. And you know, and like at least. And the Internet has just supercharged that completely because you're right. I think you nailed it when you said they got to. They want to make a number or they want to be you. You have to. You have to assign numeric value to things that are just ethereal. Right? Even looks. Even trying to be like. You'll see these fucking insane people.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

They'll put a picture of maybe the hottest woman you've ever seen in your life and they'll be like, 6.2 philtrum is degraded. You know what I mean? Like, they know about parts of the body that. No, no, human being. That's not how beauty should be judged.

[Mandel]

Right?

[Stavi]

Beauty should be a fucking ethereal thing that hits you in a certain way. And if. And you start acting a little because you see something beautiful. You know what I mean? It affects your chemical. It does. Maybe it is chemical on some level, but I don't want to understand that. I want to fucking. I want to exist in poetry.

[Mandel]

I want to feel, bro.

[Stavi]

Yeah. I don't want to. I don't want to just in the technical manual. I want to exist in a poem.

[Mandel]

I learned that through. I learned that through trying to get a little healthier. I lost a little weight, right? And I feel like when I first was. I was looking at Autumn people on YouTube. And then eventually you learn, just eat the salad. Like it's really. Yeah, you can get into the nitty gritty of it, but it could be not no burger, no vegetable.

[Stavi]

Yes, dude, it's even.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

What's pathetic. What's pathetic is it's even simpler than that. Sometimes it's like, don't eat the fries.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, you know what?

[Stavi]

Get the burger. Get the burger and eat a fucking apple. And it's like just. Cause this month I've been so fucking busy that I haven't been able to cook for myself at all. And I've been ordering out a lot, but it hasn't been. And it's not great, but in the past, if I ordered out for a month straight, I would gain £10 no matter what. But I've just been getting like chicken and fucking rice and yes, a fucking veggie on the side or some shit. But yeah, it is very simple.

[Mandel]

Yeah. I think, I think that we. I'm telling you, I think that everybody just gotta make peace with. They are. It's enough.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

You did it. Totally, dude. And I think there's so much of. I feel like once we start making, I think we have to get back to having. Finding value in the things that we do every day instead of the result.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

Because I think that. Because I think that if you go, if you're like, hey, I gotta get the number, you'll never have enough of that.

[Stavi]

No, no, no.

[Mandel]

You know, but you. Even in comedy, like you can always get bigger and bigger venues. But if you kind of put more of the self esteem in like I am doing a good product for these

[Stavi]

people in the art. Yeah, for sure. This is the.

[Mandel]

I feel like that's more fulfilling. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

You're 100% right. It's the classic the journey is more important than thing. Which I've been thinking about a lot. Obviously that's sort of my fucking. I mean what you're talking about is what I've been struggling with and trying to figure out. But you know. Yeah. Day to day enjoyment in what you do is fucking crucial. It is funny when people say that about. They're like, it's about the journey, not the destination. And they'll use the Odyssey as a. As an example. But I've read the. I've been reading the Odyssey. Just the Nolan movies got. Got me pumped. So I've been reading. I read a couple different versions of it. And it's funny when they use that example because the Odyssey is maybe the only one where that's not true. The whole point of the Odyssey is the destination he wasn't having. He didn't learn on the journey. He was being a fucking asshole and cheating on his fucking wife and. And killing, you know, and fucking with cyclopses. But that's a little. That's my classics take. We've gotten to philosophy and classical literature.

[Mandel]

Yeah. But I will say this though.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

The Randy's Donuts is very good.

[Stavi]

Yeah. Let's get back to the dough. I did so Randy's Donuts in la. I have had it. Remember, dude? Remember after the LA special eldest. That was one of the best days of our lives, dude. We. We have to do something after the Baltimore special, which is in four days. As we all know it is 4:20 after all. But we had a great day where we got a bunch. It Might have been Randy's Donuts. And we got a fucking. Me, George, me eldest, and our pal straight George. And me and eldest did a bunch of fucking mushrooms. Was it mushrooms or acid?

[Eldis]

We did shrooms.

[Stavi]

We did shrooms. And George drove us around in a fucking car while we're eating donuts and going to different LA places. That's one of the best days. Yeah.

[Mandel]

Yeah, I think. I definitely think that the.

[Stavi]

Are you a donuts guy? Overall, I am, yeah. They're so good. I stepped away from donuts for years and then, man, the donut and coffee move. It's good. It's a classic for a reason, dude.

[Mandel]

And I'm gonna say classic for a reason. It's a pretty. It's such a simple idea. For something to taste good, we gonna take some bread and we gonna dip it in sugar.

[Stavi]

We're gonna fry it first. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're not baking this bullshit.

[Mandel]

We're frying it, Dip it in sugar. It's like, hey, man, this is a season that's awesome. Like, this is. This is delicious and negative.

[Stavi]

Yeah, you're right. It's certainly sinful.

[Mandel]

You like? Dang, bro. Like, this is all the things that could be bad.

[Stavi]

You did turn something pure and a way to feed yourself.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Into a symbol of excess.

[Mandel]

Yeah. There's nutritional value.

[Stavi]

No, no, certainly not. No, certainly not. Yeah. In your hierarchy of desserts, where does. Where do donuts lay? Whoa. Yeah.

[Mandel]

This is.

[Stavi]

Now we. Now we get to the real stuff. Enough about the ceaseless. The emptiness of ceaseless success through capitalism. Let's get to the fact. Let's get to the point where. Yeah, exactly, exactly. Let's get to the brass tacks. What is your, your dessert hierarchy?

[Mandel]

Okay, so I, I feel like, honestly, I'm a big donut guy, but respect. I would say cakes over donuts. I wouldn't.

[Stavi]

You wouldn't. You wouldn't. Great.

[Mandel]

But I would say red velvet cake is my favorite dessert.

[Stavi]

Really?

[Mandel]

A good red velvet cake?

[Stavi]

Really? Elvis is shaking his head in approval here. I don't know that I agree.

[Eldis]

I don't. I don't quite approve that.

[Stavi]

Okay.

[Eldis]

I'm a little surprised.

[Mandel]

I'm a little.

[Eldis]

Anyone says red velvet now, I.

[Stavi]

Now here's where we want to place

[Mandel]

upset about red velvet slander.

[Stavi]

Well, can you, can you, can you make the case? Because I'll be honest with you, to me, red velvet is a classic. Just mid tier cake.

[Mandel]

Okay. I want to lead a podcast.

[Stavi]

I don't want to do this for you.

[Mandel]

Listen, listen, Let me say this. I do think that people who say that have not had a good red.

[Stavi]

That's fair. And I will say we have a very hilarious. Something hilarious in our life happened where a friend of ours growing up, people don't know him. He's not a. We have not made him a character in any way on the pod. Just a guy growing up in Greek town. One time he thought he was shitting blood, but he ate a whole red. He went to the fucking ER and they were like. They were like. This is the level of. Like, we have fat guys you guys don't even know about. We haven't told you. We, me and elders grew up around the type of fat guy that it's.

[Mandel]

He's.

[Stavi]

That's the fact they would blow your minds if we describe the level of obese that we grew up around. This guy was so fucking fat, he ate a whole red velvet cake. Shit. What he thought was blood was rushed to the emergency room. People are like, he's going to fucking die. He's got colon cancer. And the doctors were like. Like, they had to get like Dr. House in there. They're like, we've never seen this much blood. They got their expert. And they're like, what did you eat? And they were like. And he was. And then. And he was like, oh, not much. And then they're like. And then eventually I got cake and like, oh, what kind of cake? Like red velvet. They're like, oh, okay, but you must have like a slice. Usually he's like, no, I ate an entire red velvet cake. And they're like, get the out of you. Like, I'm. I'm certain I wasn't there. Obviously, I'm certain in that moment he had to experience fat phobia. I think the doctors must have been like, you fat cocksucker. You just. You just fucking used all our resources for two hours while we're trying to figure out where this blood is coming from.

[Mandel]

Because imagine looking at the red velvet. Boo boo. Like, what is the source?

[Stavi]

And it didn't even dawn on it. This is so fat and stupid, by the way, that it didn't even dawn on him that red velvet might be part of it.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

He wasn't like any. Because I have. I've had some atrocious shits. And I'm like, nah, that's. I deserve that. That's. I ate my way to that type of dung.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

But anyway, it's gotta go somewhere. Now. Here's the thing, man. Let's talk about Red velvet. Let's get into this. Okay. My hunch is that there is. You have an emotional connection to red velvet.

[Mandel]

You lost me.

[Stavi]

You really don't think so? It wasn't like a thing you ate growing up.

[Mandel]

I think red velvet is the best case. It's just chocolate with dye. It's not, it's not. Why do people say that? It's not, it's, it's never, never been chocolate. People always say it's chocolate. It's not chocolate. Y' all have tasted chocolate cake.

[Stavi]

What is it? It's just, it's a different cocoa in it. Cocoa in it. But people, people tell me what, do a little research for.

[Mandel]

But people are so like, people so busy on boxing it in.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

People like, oh, it got cocoa in it. It gotta be chocolate. Relax.

[Stavi]

I'm with you there.

[Mandel]

People, people are all type of things. Cakes are all type of vibe.

[Stavi]

What would you discuss? What would you describe the flavor profile of red velvet? Because I'm having a hard time coming up with anything unique to red velvet.

[Mandel]

It has cocoa essence with cream cheese icing.

[Stavi]

It's the cream cheese that does it for you.

[Mandel]

It's killing it.

[Stavi]

So the fact that it's a more subtle chocolate varietal with a cream cheese icing.

[Mandel]

Yes. And here's the thing about red velvet. Red velvet is you can make it bad.

[Stavi]

You can.

[Mandel]

So like, great example, you could get a good chocolate cake, a good birthday cake down at the, at the fart factory.

[Stavi]

Sure, sure. We have. One thing America has done very well is we have perfected sheet cake birthday sheet cake technology. You go to Costco, get you a sheet cake, that's good shit.

[Mandel]

But if you get into pound cake, German chocolate, red velvet, that's when you go have to have a craftsman involved.

[Stavi]

I agree with you there.

[Mandel]

And I think that what happened is people have been so overexposed to poorly made red velve that they have allowed that to shade their opinion over the food.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

But we gotta remain open minded.

[Stavi]

I'm open minded. If I'm. If I'm anything, it's open minded to cake. If we're anything on this podcast.

[Mandel]

Matter of fact, let me know when you. Next time you go to Atlanta.

[Stavi]

I bet we're going. Yeah, we'll be there. I need to know. I'll go wherever you send me.

[Mandel]

Okay. Go to this place called Sammy Cheesecake. Sammy Cheesecake Cheesecake place.

[Stavi]

I'm listening.

[Mandel]

But they got a red velvet.

[Stavi]

I love this. This is like a fat speakeasy where you're like now you're gonna go to chees place. But they have.

[Mandel]

But because.

[Stavi]

Because of the cheesecake. The. The cheesecake icing's next level. And I'm assuming.

[Mandel]

I'm be honest. I didn't put that together until you just said it.

[Stavi]

I think that's probably what it is. I'm just guessing.

[Mandel]

Here you go down to Sammy Cheesecake. Get. Get it with the pecans in it. Don't get it without the pecans. Okay. Get that slice.

[Stavi]

Get it with the pecans. Now I'm starting to think this is a cultural thing in Atlanta. I'm starting to think black people. Black people must do red velvet in a way that has not crossed over. Over.

[Mandel]

And I'm. I'm open to that.

[Stavi]

I think that must be what it is because you're talking to guys who know cakes here.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

And. And maybe. And Baltimore. I don't. It was never really a thing. Maybe it's a Southern. Southern black thing. Might be the best red velvet that I'm.

[Mandel]

I'm. I'm pretty sure that could PL.

[Stavi]

That. And I do like what you're saying though, where Pe. That you will at least admit that the average is a higher degree of difficulty cake. So that. Because what people see most of the time is a mid. The mid version of a red velvet cake is bad in my opinion. But you're saying judge it on the top level.

[Mandel]

Because here's my thing. I'm judging it based on people's best selves.

[Stavi]

And I respect that.

[Mandel]

And I think that the best red velvet is leaps and bounds better than the best chocolate.

[Stavi]

Now this is interesting.

[Mandel]

I think that.

[Stavi]

I think. You know what we need to do?

[Mandel]

Double chocolate cake. And you gave me a red velvet. I guarantee we go blindfold test just straight flavor palette. The red velvet.

[Stavi]

I like this. What we have to do. We have to figure something out during the holidays and we have to have a. Like a tournament of cakes.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

And it will be. Fuck. We might have to do all fat. Fat November or fat December. And we might. Because we got some. Between the whole fat house crew. We get Mandel. We get fucking Are you garbage. We get. We. We get. We get Gabriel. We.

[Mandel]

We.

[Stavi]

We need to get some fat lady representation as well.

[Mandel]

You know, I think we should do.

[Stavi]

What's that?

[Mandel]

We should do this either before or after. I think we should do a national comedian weight loss competition. You know, Reggie Conquest.

[Stavi]

I love Reggie.

[Mandel]

Me and Reggie been talking about for like a year.

[Stavi]

I love Reggie.

[Mandel]

We put together a bunch of comedians and have, like, a big.

[Stavi]

Like, we. So I am. I am really thinking about. And we don't want to. You know, I don't want to talk out of turn a little bit, but let's just say Stavi gets ripped. The series I've been doing for a while.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

We're thinking about adding some wrinkles to it, and I think getting some other comics involved. Yeah. Could really help. So this is good. No, no. I. I think we need to figure something out about. Right around the holidays. We need to have a consecutive four fat. Four weeks of fat guests. And I think we need to judge cakes every week. I think. I think we need to do. And we're basically just stealing something from Doughboys. This feels like what Doughboys would do. They just had. Are you familiar with the Doughboys podcast?

[Mandel]

I've heard of it.

[Stavi]

You'd be great. We. You got to get on it. I got to talk because, you know, I'm trying to get. Because basically what we're talking about is this is an Avengers type thing for fat podcasters. We might have to do it across, like, five different podcasts. We might have to join. We might have to do the, like, bandana red and blue guy holding it to talk cakes. Because to me and I would like each fat podcast to bring one dessert. And we. You are judged solely by what you bring. And that way we take. Because there is a philosophical divide between the best. The best, like the best available thing, like the average thing, versus the best of the best.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

There is a philosophy. Whenever you're. Whenever you're like. Fruits is a great example. When you're ranking fruits, the best BlackBerry is incredible, but most blackberries suck dick. You almost never get them ripe. Yeah. Mango the same. The best mango may be the best thing of all time, but when you get a hard, weird mango, that sucks. Whereas a banana is never above a B. But pretty much every banana that's yellow tastes the same.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

So there's a. There's a. Apples to an apple. If an apple's your favorite fruit, you're a. But a random apple is probably good. Yeah. Probably solid. But I'm never. Those are never what you gravitate towards. So this is good on 420. You know, we're all high as we got the munchies. That's why we're talking cakes on 420. We hatched the idea for the Fat Fat Comedians. We got to come up with a better name. But the Tournament of Cakes, they need an acronym. We do need a. Yeah. Tournament of Cakes. Is T, O, C. Not that. Not great. We got to work on the act. Yeah, we need an old school, like, mid-2000s rap acronym. You know how they really were forcing them for years. My favorite K. Huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Made with a K. My favorite is Chic. Remember Chic? Eldest, the dipset was really reaching for Chic. What was it? It swag.

[Mandel]

Oh, I can't remember.

[Stavi]

Do you remember what Chic was? Look up the Jewel. Santana. Chic.

[Mandel]

But I will say this. We do need to get this done before I get my leg surgery.

[Stavi]

Because that's true.

[Mandel]

Because when I. Because when I get that, I am turning my back on y'. All.

[Stavi]

Of course. Of course I am turning my back. This will be the final. Yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

I'm turning to Brian.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

I get a leg surgery, I'm like, y' all, put them burgers down. Y' all, stop killing yourself.

[Stavi]

Y' all depressed, Dude, I can't wait. I can't wait to fucking. To go through the fucking Marvel. I'm gonna just find who. The Marvel Doctor.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

I'm not Cat. I'm never gonna be in a Marvel movie, but I'm just gonna get the transformation.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Because I. Listen, I'm mocking you about your leg surgery.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

But I have. I'm dreaming the same dreams. It's just minor. Much more steroid. Steroid based.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

Where it's like, look, I'm not. I have. I hurt my back. And I'll probably be dealing with this all year. And the idea of recovery for a surgery that's, like, worse than this. I'm never doing it. But the idea of doing some fucking steroids or peptides. Rich people seem to be doing peptides. Now I'm doing all. I'm figuring all the secret rich guy stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm figuring it all out.

[Mandel]

But you know something, though? This does make us hypocrites. Cause we did just talk about being enough.

[Stavi]

Right?

[Mandel]

And now we trying to get tall and stuff.

[Stavi]

But here's the thing. Here's the thing. There is nothing. That's another. That's the flip side. Because sometimes the fat. The fat activist stuff goes way too far.

[Mandel]

Totally.

[Stavi]

It's one thing to accept yourself for who you are, which is important. But let's. This. I think we've done this before where it's like, all right, everybody. Everybody who's not fat, stop listening for a minute. Okay? Just us fat guys now. And gals. We should lose a couple pounds, right?

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

We all need to be honest with ourselves. We should all. We've done this before. It might have been on an episode you were on.

[Mandel]

We don't have to pretend.

[Stavi]

But, but it's important to accept who you are, where you are. But also it's fine to want to change and improve yourself. That's the thing that pisses me off is like why does it have to be you're smashing your face with hammers to get your bone structure right, or you're the fattest guy of all time who can't go upstairs and now, and now every, everyone has to. And listen, if you're legitimately disabled, and that's you, and that's fine, people should have to fucking make your life not a living hell. But if you're just a guy like us who's, who's, who's had a couple. Who's hit Sammy's cheesecake a little too often. We gotta be honest with ourselves here, man.

[Mandel]

Yeah. And we don't want to get, we don't want to get obsessed with black and white thinking, man. We can't have some nuance.

[Stavi]

There's some nuance.

[Mandel]

You can lose some weight while not also trying to, you know, never die.

[Stavi]

Of course, of course, of course, of course.

[Mandel]

I think it's a little middle. Well, but I'm pretty sure everybody involved knows these things too. That's what I'm saying. It's about the attention. I think all of it is. People find value and attention from the Internet. So you gotta be as extreme as possible.

[Stavi]

That's fair. You know what I'm saying? Now let's, before we get to the questions, let's finish up. So red velvet is number one to you.

[Mandel]

I was about to ask what's your favorite case?

[Stavi]

Okay, I was. Maybe this is similar because I, because I'm going to say I like a bread pudding as my number one. Interesting, but very. And now I'm understanding where you're coming from because yes, a random bread pudding is bad even though I like it. You give me some bullshit with raisins. It's not set the right way. But the fucking best bread pudding to me, it's just my favorite because. Because of the breadiness to it. And you gotta, it's gotta have chocolate and it's gotta be paired with a fucking ice cream.

[Mandel]

Okay.

[Stavi]

It's gotta go a la mode, right? Yeah. Don't even fuckin look at me. If you're having your favorite dessert. It's not a la mode.

[Mandel]

I'm in my mode if I'm alamode.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're not putting a fucking scoop of the finest vanilla.

[Caller 2]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

And it should be vanilla so that it can make whatever sing.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Right.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

The ice cream shouldn't. Should be a. It's a role player. It's setting picks. It's rebounding so that your main dessert can dunk. Right.

[Mandel]

Wow.

[Stavi]

That's how I see the isle of Mode ice. It works for apple pie. It works for fucking cakes.

[Mandel]

I didn't put pies in the mix.

[Stavi]

Pies are pretty good.

[Mandel]

Pies are pretty good.

[Stavi]

To me, pie is probably. But what pie?

[Mandel]

I'm a big. I'm basic, bro. I like an apple.

[Stavi]

Apple's good. Yeah. Another apple a la mode.

[Mandel]

Apple pie a la mode is incredible.

[Stavi]

Yeah. Especially the. When the. When the shit's a little crunchy.

[Mandel]

Come on, man.

[Stavi]

And you feel like you're eating fruit.

[Mandel]

Go crust.

[Stavi]

Crust heavy. And you get me a springy apple, not a mushy ass apple. Listen, I'll take it either way, by the way, but I like. Yeah.

[Mandel]

If you want to get into the science of it. I hate to say it, bro. Grab them two apple pies at McDonald's. Put them in the McFlurry with no. No topping.

[Stavi]

Oh, that's a whole other. The tournament. The dessert tournament. Yeah.

[Mandel]

I done did the science.

[Stavi]

The dessert tournament is we. There's two levels to it. There's the absolute best bakery, and then there's gas. What can you do at a gas station? What can you do at a fast food restaurant? What can you do at a fuck? Just, you know, and then, like, grab bag. Like, you know, we drop you within a. That's. That's fun, too. It's like. There's different. What can you do with a vending machine? What can you get done? You know what I mean? Like, they're prison rules almost. When you see those videos of guys making chimichangas with Doritos and dog food, somehow you're like, how do they do that? Put this guy in the culinary.

[Mandel]

My favorite video was somebody doing the incarcerated birthday cake.

[Stavi]

Hell, yeah.

[Mandel]

And they, like, smashed some Twinkies and made some legs. And I was like, man, it's crazy, man. People are really resourceful.

[Stavi]

Absolutely. The human spirit and creativity. In fact, that to me is so. That is more artful to me than almost every type of online content.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

I would rather watch. I would see the pat. The pathos and the fucking. The heart that goes into. These guys in jail. They just want their friend to have a nice birthday. They're doing their best.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

You know what I mean? They don't want to be here just dudes eating fucking smashed up Twinkies. But for an hour it's like you're fucking at home with your, with your family. And that's beautiful. And that is more that the artistic value of the of jail food is so much more powerful than a lot of people who make their living making art, to be honest with you. Yeah, this is great. This has been a very philosophy heavy first part which I love. Sometimes people got to see how we think on this beautiful program. But it's time to help the people, Elder. So why don't you fucking play us a couple, couple fucking calls. What's up Brodies? Oh, the days, they're getting. They're getting warmer, but they can still be cold. We're in spring. Sometimes that sun, that sun feels like it's gone by 4:30. Luckily, there's a simple way to make those dark afternoons feel a little more enjoyable. Bow down to Twisted Tea, the king of hard iced teas. Twisted Tea is smooth as Helen made with real brewed tea. No weird flavors, no pretending to be something fancy, just refreshing, easy to drink hard iced tea that somehow makes winter hangouts feel way less bleak. Snow outside, bring the good times indoors. Just you, your friends, a cozy couch, a fireplace, and a Saturday you've been waiting on all week. Oh yeah, and some freaking twisted teas. Conversations loosen up, laughs come easier. And suddenly winter don't feel quite so aggressive, do it. And at 5% alcohol, it's got enough kick to make things fun without going overboard. Crack open a can of Twisted tea. Keep it twisted. Must be 21 plus. Please drink responsibly. Fuck. Starting something new isn't just hard, it can be terrifying. You know, Stavi's world, it was very scary. I left a very successful venture, the name of which I won't say because this is an advertisement where I was making a lot of money and I had to start completely over new feed. You know, I knew some people were going to be mad at me and I realized it was going to be a hard decision. But we wanted to start our own thing from scratch. That was hard to do. You know, we had to train someone who has no capabilities whatsoever to produce a podcast. It's. It's terrifying. Especially when you're starting a business. Starting something new is hard. That's why it helps to have a partner like Shopify by your side. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Death Wish Coffee and Magic Spoon to brands just getting started. Get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready to use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. Like I said, I have had Shopify. It's helped Stavi's world. All our merch goes through Shopify. It's helped me as just my personal. As a comedian, my personal merch. When we were selling, you know, T shirts, the calendar, of course we love Shopify. Our merch guy, our beautiful merch guy, Chris loves all. How easy it is to track all our sales. Do everything off Shopify. It's time to turn those what ifs into sales with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.comstavi go to shopify.comstavi

[Caller 2]

that's shopify.comstavi stavi eldis esteemed guest Got a weird. That's not that weird.

[Stavi]

All right, so here's what's up.

[Caller 2]

My daughter is 15.

[Caller 1]

She's pretty cool.

[Caller 2]

She's got like good politics, believes in, you know, labor rights. Not a racist. Good things. She's in art school all around a cool kid, very empathetic and cares deeply about her friends. So much so that when she found out that one of her friends was vaping in the bathroom at school, she was really bothered by this because she knows that vaping is for losers. Unless you're using it to quit nicotine, in which case good on you. But you know, 15 year old should not necessarily be vaping and she. To help her friend. So she's torn. She doesn't want. She wants to know how to go about reporting her friend to the principals or whatever. She gets caught or gets in trouble or something. And I didn't raise no snitch and

[Stavi]

Jesus, I got bothered by the fact

[Caller 2]

that she's doing some cop like behavior.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah.

[Caller 2]

You should just bully her friend and tease her relentlessly for vaping and maybe that'll work. But she wants to be a fucking tattletale and I don't love that.

[Stavi]

So that's a question.

[Caller 2]

What do you do if your kid is trying to be a snitch? Thank you very much.

[Stavi]

This is tough.

[Caller 2]

Bye.

[Stavi]

Because without question, I would rather have the kid vaping than the kid trying to figure out how to report her friend. What you're. Dude, you raised a fucking dork and that's okay because we can. You can de dork someone and they start from that. I think that's that's fine. But man, this is a big moment. This is a big parenting moment.

[Mandel]

I definitely think it, I think you. It's gotta take the approach of preaching the loyalty between the friendship.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

Like that has more value.

[Stavi]

Yes.

[Mandel]

Than whatever the rule that she's trying to enforce. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Sure. And it isn't. He's in an interesting spot here because you risk this. His kid. Clearly. And the funny thing is about 15 year olds is like, they're really like 10 year olds. Like mentally they're just like little ass kids. It's actually kind of cute when you see someone like, like, like even all the way through, even like first year of college, you have people who like are growing and you see them like, like you'll, you'll have like, I have like a little cousin who's like, he's kind of like a dude. Right. Like they're in, they're in high school, like him and his little sisters and you know, they fought. He looks like a, like at first glance, if you're not paying attention, like, oh, yeah, that's like a grown, you know, grown. A grown person, whatever. A young adult. And then you talk to them and it's like, they're little ass. They're dumb babies.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Right. It's a fun. Like, God bless whoever teaches like middle school and, and, and high school. That's such a weird, crazy thing to do. So this. So you risk. I think what's happening is your daughter is kind of running on middle to elementary school programming right now. She's a little sheltered. This kind of happened to me. I remember when I had a friend who was trying to get pussy when we were 15. And I was like, what girls will let us do that? And I was like, that'd be all. And you know, he throws like a party and I'm a loser because I'm. It's like you, it's like you're a little kid who doesn't understand it's even possible for you to. Because we just were, we just lived like children. Like, I mean, you could argue to this day. I live like a little boy. Like, I just have a big ass tv. Me and my friend talk shit. That's our job. You know what I mean? So it's like he could, by being like, you know, it's not really a big deal if your friend vapes. He could destroy. He could turn his kid into being like, does anything matter? And now she's getting fucked up. And now she's going hard the other way. So it is a delicate spot to be.

[Mandel]

Absolutely. Because I think you could definitely. You definitely don't want to invalidate the seriousness of the infraction to her. But I do think, yeah.

[Stavi]

Cause it's kind of cute that her. His daughter is 15 and thinks it's crazy. It's crazy that her friend is vaping. It's like, you're 15, you fucking dork. That is the age you're trying to do drugs, you're trying to drink, you're trying to do all this shit.

[Mandel]

But I think as you get older, you do realize how much value it is in community and your relationships beyond the things that are set upon us, like what we're supposed to do, what we're not supposed to do. And so I think.

[Stavi]

And all that stuff's fake, by the way. Like. Like the idea that the. The we are actually have or live in a society of rules is completely fake. There's no justice. There's no, like. I think this is a good moment for her to realize what you're saying, where what matters is the actual bonds you make with people, the real. The, like, loyalty, the knowing that you can have their back because she, his daughter, is now operating in a world where, well, somebody's doing something wrong. You go to authority, who is infallible, who knows everything and will fix the situation. And this is a good moment to teach your daughter that. Like, her principal's probably a idiot. You know what I mean? Authority is more often than not fucking stupid, right? Like, they don't. And what's. What's important here. Or not. Not fucking stupid, but not necessarily knows how to deal with things. And what's important here is to let her know, like, no, look, your friend might be vaping. She might be going through something. It might be a phase. It might not be. She might vape, she might smoke her whole life, she might not. But this is your friend who you need to be there for. And you also need to be like, just talk to her about it. Bullying, making fun of her for smoking is one thing, like, whatever, but it's just like, you just have to let them know that you just. What's way more important is to be there for your friend. Because, look, right now it's vaping, which is kind of under control, but there might be a time where they get in over their head and it's like, now's not the time to go to authority, I guess is maybe. What I would say is that this is A really low level infraction. And you also need to tell your daughter she has to deal with things herself. This is a great opportunity to find this out because the stakes are low.

[Mandel]

Yeah. And I think, and I think there's nothing wrong with actually learning how to communicate concern to a friend.

[Stavi]

Sure, sure.

[Mandel]

Directly. And having value in that. It doesn't need to be beyond, beyond the two people. It's like, hey, this person is important to me. And I think that this is damaging to you and communicating that rather than trying to export the responsibility outside of themselves.

[Stavi]

Yeah, that's fair. Now you go back and you think about being 15.

[Mandel]

Oh, totally. Yeah.

[Stavi]

And you're like, and you're like, you

[Mandel]

just wanted to stop.

[Stavi]

You just wanted to stop. But it's also like, how do you not see that go like, I'm trying to think about being 15 and like telling a teacher on fucking Eldis. I mean, to me that's the bigger problem is that this is even in your kids thinking. I mean, like, this is kind of insane where it's like, maybe it's. She's so scared of it. Like, it'd be like if Eldis was doing heroin to me.

[Eldis]

Right, Right.

[Stavi]

Where I'm like, I need to have an intervention, but she's just fucking vaping. So it's like. And it's. It's also cute that she told her parents, but I think this is a trusting individual.

[Mandel]

But I think this is a. Definitely a sign of some level of solid moral compass.

[Stavi]

Yeah, for sure.

[Mandel]

They just be.

[Stavi]

That's a good point.

[Mandel]

Misguided in execution.

[Stavi]

You know, that's a really good point because she's not wrong, but her knee jerk reaction is wrong, is to snitch and to go to authority. And I think there's a twofold lesson here which is like, it's better to just handle things within your group, within your community on some level than to go outside. Unless it's a really big problem. And then you're like, hey, you should probably save. You might never need to go to like authority or whatever, but it's like, this should be when your friend is in like serious danger. And right now, just being a kid and you could even say like, hey, I don't want you to vape, but you need to kind of going forward, you need to know the difference between something where we have to call in somebody and the difference where you would just have to talk to your friend. And, and there is value in saying that. And by the way, being the kind of 15 year old can be like, I don't think this is good for you, man. That's good. That's important. But I also think on some level it's like, what's. Her friends are going to start drinking soon, if they haven't already. They're going to start smoking weed. They're going to start having sex. Like, like. And you could. I think really the message is, look, you be whoever you want to be. You do safe stuff. Do you. Like, this stuff is crazy. And that's important. And I'm proud of you for feeling that way. But you also have to understand you can't change the way your friends behave. All you can do is be there for them. And if they're in really serious danger, then we can talk about it. But this is not one of those situations. And then to say to her as the parent, and if you're ever in serious pro, if you're ever struggling with anything, you can talk to me. That's the really biggest positive here, is that she clearly feels comfortable like telling you about this. And I think that's the main thing you want to. That's a hard thing to do. You should be proud that your kid actually wants to talk. Because I would never in a million years think I could go to my parents with my friends doing drugs. First of all, I would be like, nice, let's do drugs. You know, I was hiding. I was actively hiding drug use at this age from my parents. And so it's cute, but, you know, that's what I would say.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

It's like, you gotta handle some shit on your own. And all you can do there, all you can do is be there for your friends. And if they're in serious trouble, talk to me. We can handle it. We can figure it out. And if you're ever in serious trouble and any. You can always come to me. But you need to start learning that, like, we can't really trust who's in charge. You know your friend better than your fucking principal does. You know what I mean?

[Mandel]

And you made the best point that it is cool that he has that relationship where she will come to him with anything.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying? I think that's. That's something that everybody doesn't have.

[Stavi]

Totally. Damn. That's so funny. What was the crew looking like at 15? What were you up to? 15 vapes weren't out back then.

[Mandel]

I wasn't vaping. I was. I was kind of a little bit on that. I was like, I ain't do nothing. I ain't do no activities. Ain't smoke nothing.

[Stavi]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't do anything.

[Mandel]

I was one of them.

[Stavi]

Like, you're like, how guys. You gotta. Yeah. You're telling people they need to go to church to save their souls.

[Mandel]

I was definitely like, dang, y' all not studying. I had some of that in me, you know, for sure.

[Stavi]

The sour grapes for not being at the party.

[Mandel]

I was doing what y' all doing. I was wanna. I definitely. But you know, when you start, when you try to be. Be judgment man at that age, you really just trying to protect your own.

[Stavi]

That's fully what it is. Yeah.

[Mandel]

You trying to create some image of yourself to protect your own insecurity.

[Stavi]

Oh, I could be getting and smoking weed. I don't want to because it's bad for me. And you guys should be doing that. You should be hitting the books.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

Not having an awesome weekend.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Not trying pills.

[Mandel]

There's a bunch of that, like, definitely trying to be like, that's what y' all doing.

[Stavi]

I mean, that's a classic move of like. That's another place where the, like, fat and the, like. That's why fat. Fatness has so much like, cross community. Like, we relate to a lot of different people because I think that's the kind of behavior you also get from, like, closeted people who are like. Who are like, oh, God, this is. Guys, we need to be focused and we need to. And of course, I'd love to fuck Cindy. She's so hot. But I can't have premarital sex and neither should you. It's like there's a little bit of the, like, hiding being either a loser or hiding that identity you're uncomfortable with through the rules. And that's. That's a big problem. It doesn't. Your. Your. Your kid just sounds like a little bit of a goody two shoes and that's fine. That's kind of cute and good for you. Congratulations. Next question. Eldis.

[Caller 2]

First time, long time. I'll jump right into it. I've been dating a girl for about five months, and the problem I'm having is she busts hardest when she's riding me. Now, that's not necessarily a problem, but the problem is she rides aggressively. Compound to that. She wants me to grab her hips and slam her down on me when she's fucking me as hard as possible. Adding to that, she does this little hip flick at the end.

[Stavi]

Okay.

[Caller 2]

I swear to God, it hurts like nothing.

[Stavi]

Right.

[Caller 2]

Feels like she's about to snap my dick off. I'm trying different things like adjusting angle. I tried moving my hips up, tried putting my legs up to try and fix that.

[Stavi]

Doing a bridge.

[Caller 2]

No, no, get those down.

[Mandel]

I'm coming in for the.

[Caller 2]

The thunder.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Caller 2]

So where I'm at is she's a self conscious person. I don't want to ruin her favorite position.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Caller 2]

How do I bring this up to her without hurting her feelings and keeping my member intact? Additionally, I come the hardest when I

[Caller 1]

her in the ass.

[Caller 2]

It's just a fair trade situation.

[Stavi]

Don't try. Don't try and sneak that in there.

[Mandel]

He's got.

[Stavi]

He's got a treatise on every angle that this girl is like. And by the way, I like to fuck her in the ass. I come the hardest. That's crazy. And for you to try. For you to try and make an equivalence of a woman riding you and you fucking her ass, that's just. Buddy, that's apples and oranges. I hate to break.

[Eldis]

I do like that he's linking it with a pain. He's like, she's hurting my dick. Yeah, I'll hurt her ass a little. That's how we get off. Where's the middle ground?

[Stavi]

No, brother, this ain't not. This is not a fair trade. Okay, let's start there. Go. Mandel, you have some thoughts?

[Mandel]

Well, my thoughts is probably around the thing.

[Stavi]

Sure, sure, sure. No, no, please, go ahead.

[Mandel]

Have you ever had someone where you had a follow up where you answered the thing and then you hear their response from their per. The other. The person they're talking about hearing it

[Stavi]

on the podcast a couple times people have called in together. But we've never had. That's true. We've never had like a different. Maybe there's been one thing I'm not thinking of where somebody called in to sort of defend themselves, but more so we get them responding. We don't really get like we'll never. We've never gotten, for example, the girlfriend's perspective here. No. Which I would be fascinated. But my dream is to actually be able to. One of the first versions of this show was almost like a judge show where everybody comes and gives me their take. And I would love to do some version of that. I don't want to swaggerjack Ms. Pat. Right now she's got. Ms. Pat settles it. And I would be doing. I would kind of be stealing her whole thing if I'm being honest. So I'm gonna let that she does it until she wants. Maybe it's like family Feud where it's like, I can take over. Ms. Pat settles it. It could be Stavi settles it. I could be the next. I could be the next host of Bets. Stavi settles it. And it's. Everything's the same. It's just me. That would be fucking awesome, man.

[Mandel]

You should come up with a Greek TV channel.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't want to fucking deal with all those. That's too many Greeks for me, man. There's only a couple good ones. Now, this guy, but which I would love to get this girl's take. Now, let's, I guess, should we discuss the fact that he comes the hardest when he fucks? I mean, that's kind of nuts. That's kind of crazy also. What do you mean, the hardest? We're not. Listen, that's the thing about dudes. Let's be very clear. Sure, there's things you like more than others, but it's like a guy bust the same whether he's fucking, you know, unless you're sting and you're doing tantric sex for 10 hours or whatever. But it's like. Like you don't come hard. Women come harder. Men come the same. Let's be fucking honest. Honest. You just like fucking. You just like butt fucking. And that's fine. No, there's no judgment here. I just don't appreciate you trying to pretend that these two things are the same. And I've been there. I know when I ultimately think you kind of have to take one for the team here. If this is how she busts, and we're probably talking about in a total. And look, is it. How painful is it? I don't know. I've had to be like, you know, I have a fucked up penis, famously. I've discussed that. I've had to be like, hey, chill. Getting a spam phone call. I've had to pause and be like, whoa, whoa, I need a little breather for my fucked up dick. But I've gotten right back in the zone. And ultimately, I think the fact that you have a key to your girl busting is. Is more than most. Many would kill to be in your position. The fact that, you know your girl can bust in a certain way,

[Mandel]

I

[Stavi]

think you just need to tell her, hey, sometimes it fucking. But you have the. You have what you need. You just have to discuss. Don't be afraid to just share something. And if she's self conscious, that's one thing. You're like, hey, this is awesome. Can we, you know, can we just figure a couple things out here. Cause I'm sure you can find a middle way if you're just a little vocal. If it's not all or nothing, I

[Eldis]

bet there's some pelvic bracing that could go on for this guy. That's not the full on bridge where she's still in the same position, but he's like, you know, maybe you need

[Stavi]

a pillow under your hips for a change. You know what I mean? Something like, maybe we need a specific ergonomic fuck pillow. Maybe your dick's not hard enough, pal. I hate that. Let's be honest. Let's call, let's, let's really fucking and, you know, let's throw our cards out on the table. What the fuck is the expression? Whatever. It's positive. Because listen, I know that if my dick's not very hard, it really shows itself when I'm being ridden, for example. There's no way to. You can kind of finesse a wiggly penis when you're on top, but when somebody else is making use of your penis as a tool, maybe your dick's not hard enough. And can we do something there? Can we increase blood flow? Can we get our vascularity better? And then, look, the fact that you like anal sex is just a different conversation. So let's not put these two together. When you talk to her about this, don't propose a trade where it's like, hey, you get to bust and I get to fuck your ass whenever I want. Not an equivalence, because I'm guessing you're busting from traditional, you know, intercourse. But that's, I think that's my take on it, is that you have to have a convo. You have to think about all the elements here. And if this is the, the way she busts, you got to figure something out here because that's, that's a nice thing to have in a, in a, in a long term relationship. Maybe you do a little finger aggressive finger popping. I'm sure they're related. You know, I'm sure you can achieve certain same goals that way. Just, just, just thinking of my own experiences.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

So, you know, that's, I think that's what I would counsel the man on. Man, you have, you, you have no direct takes here.

[Mandel]

Yeah, I really don't.

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

I was, I was, I was listening to bro and he was having so much fun.

[Stavi]

He was pretty technical about it.

[Mandel]

Yeah, like, he was having so much fun. And I did think, like you said, he did go super detailed and then at the last minute said his Thing and it hung up. Yeah. That was like.

[Stavi]

That was a little nuts. That caught me a little off guard.

[Mandel]

That wasn't slick. We caught you.

[Stavi]

I do appreciate. Because I do think we're in similar space. Like, I think we're both. Me and you are both sort of fascinated by, like, a. A type of retro fat guy, unk type of. But I appreciate about you is that you have a wholesomeness. Cause that. Cause there is very typically that kind of older, unk scumbag uncle. You know, like, not quite a dad. Like, literally your uncle that's around. Oftentimes, there's a horny energy attached to it, and I like that you keep it pure. For you, it's about the aesthetics. There's not. There's hints of horniness, but there's no. There's no outward displays of. Of horniness.

[Mandel]

Honestly, bro, I think. I think I'm one of them people who. Because most of my standup career is gigs.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

I think I'm still stuck in the, like, keep it clean.

[Stavi]

Keep it clean. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mandel]

If you want to work.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying? When you don't got an audience, bro, it's a lot of, like, I can work gigs.

[Stavi]

Sure. You know what I'm saying? And that's true. That is my. I definitely ran up against that a lot early in my career. Shout out to Tom Papa, who. Who did not. It's not a clean comic, but people thought of him that way, and he let me. I opened for him for years, and the one time a lady was like, your opener was disgusting. And he was like, fuck you, lady. He fully had my back. It was awesome. He's the man for that.

[Mandel]

It really is really just more about that.

[Stavi]

I see. I see.

[Mandel]

I just be trying to lie.

[Stavi]

Oh, I'd love. Oh, okay.

[Mandel]

Cause I be so scared. Like, I be so scared, like, if I have to go back to colleges and churches, I don't want him to look up the files. Be like, never mind. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Yeah, yeah, sure. I respect that. Okay, nice. So there might be a horny unveiling with Mandel in about a decade.

[Mandel]

I don't think I've heard them two words,

[Stavi]

because that really is sort of the final unk form is just being sort of. And there's a passive horniness to it where it's not aggressive. You're just always a little horny, and you're always just looking at. You know, it's like when you see an old fat guy just like, it looks like he's reading. Usually he's watching the most intense pornography you've ever seen in your life. I do feel like there is like Patrisse had an old bit about being like an old creep or like an undercover creep where it's just, I'm trying to. He's just like in a park bench looking like a woman's like ankles or something, you know what I mean? Just like, I gotta find that bit. That is kind of what we're describing. Anyway. Next question. LD folks, you know me, I'm a glasses man. I'm a dedicated glasses user for over 15 years at this point in my life. And it's always, I always find it quite the hassle to find the right frames. I got a huge noggin, you know, I gotta, I gotta, I. It's. It's hard for me to understand what's gonna really look good on this, on this beautiful face. Thankfully, Warby Parker makes it easier to get well designed, high quality prescription eyewear without that usual hassle. With Warby Parker, you can use virtual try on to see how frames look on your face in real time using your phone. Prescription glasses start at $95. They also offer contacts, online, eye exams, sunglasses, and over 300 retail stores across the U.S. i've loved Warby Parker for years. Some of my earliest glasses, I got these bad boys. They are my, honestly my favorite sunglasses because usually when you get a sunglass that's prescription, if we're being honest, they can look kind of dorky. These look fucking sick. I'm feeling like I got some ni. I got big frames. I could see that with the virtual try on because I got this big head. They fit me nicely. I'm pumped on these. I've been rocking these all spring. I'm going to be rocking them into the summer right now for you. You could get like me. You could get this nice with it right now. Buy one prescription pair and get 20% off any additional prescription [e-mail] Stavy that's 20% off additional prescription pairs when you go to W A r b y. Parker.comstavi Look, I grew up in Baltimore. I'm familiar with a water bug, a cockroach, whatever you want to call it. Years of growing up poor though still, when I see them, it does give me the damn heebie jeebies. Okay? Thankfully, pesty is a do it yourself pest control that makes protecting your home simple and effective. Pesti gets rid of over 100 types of bugs, spiders, ants, roaches scorpions, whatever. Their DIY kit includes a sprayer, mixing bag, pesticide gloves and instructions you can complete in less than 10 minutes. With Pesti, you can get started at just $35 per treatment with a customized plan based on your location, bugs and climate. Plus Pesti offers a 100% bug free guarantee or your money back. If the bugs don't go away, you don't gotta pay. Look, I've been in some weird bad living situations. One bug turns into 10, turns into a hundred, turns into God knows how many. When I moved into my new spot, I saw one cockroach. I hit pesky immediately. The problem went away. I can't tell you how good it felt to not have to worry about this anymore. Knowing that I was going to take action and not have this be the kind of thing that annoys me. I had a moth infestation. I threw away a weird rug, got pesty. We were in the clear. You're going to love it. Keep the bugs away with Pesti. Go to pesti.comstavi for an extra 10% off your order. That's P S T I E.comstavi for an extra ten percent off.

[Caller 2]

Hey Stavi. What's up guys? Gals. Non binary pals, whatever. Jumping right in. So I got a friend. Thank you for inclusivity planning this like you know, cross country Scotland trip, road trip. Right. We've always been platonic friends. We used to work together. We've done some travels like this. I'm not expecting to, you know, maybe you never know. Less than 5% chance. But even like with those chances being pretty low. She's an outdoorsy person. I imagine we're going to be doing a lot of hike. A lot. I like doing that stuff too.

[Stavi]

Another classic. Trying to sneak something in. Anyway, at 5%, I'm. I'm not thinking about it. It's all you're thinking about. Hey, come on, man. Come on. Dude, who the are you calling into? Yeah, you're going on a trip with a girl. You're like, oh, we're probably not gonna. I'm not even thinking about it. You're. Every moment you're around her, you're. You're vibrating with how badly you want to her and you think you can hide that you're going on a trip with a platonic trip. Anyway, sorry.

[Mandel]

No, he brought it up twice. Yeah, this. This far. So that is dishonest.

[Stavi]

So can we. Sorry, hit me with. I just got a weird text so I missed the very beginning.

[Eldis]

So this friend is In England and they're planning a cross country trip to Scotland. That sounds like it'll be pretty outdoorsy.

[Stavi]

That's cute though. I like that trip idea. And so he lives where? He lives here. He lives there.

[Eldis]

He didn't specify, but I think he lives here.

[Stavi]

Okay. Anyway, keep going.

[Caller 2]

I am probably in the worst shape of my fucking life. I'm damn near £300 and I've got like three or four months to prepare.

[Stavi]

5 7. That's a normal weight for that height. Sounds like you're just right from what my Doctors told me. 5 7, 300. That's exactly right on the BMI scale.

[Caller 2]

A lot of time, but you could still make some significant progress. I just can't find any motivation stuff. I just can't stop eating and smoking weed and oversleeping and.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Caller 2]

I don't know, I'm just really depressed. The world seems shitty. War.

[Stavi]

And it is.

[Caller 2]

And I've been thinking about quitting the weed. But like it's like. I'm pretty sure me buying weed is one of my friends like only sources of income. And I guess it's an excuse, but that stops me from like just trying to cut that out. But what do I do? How do I get ripped like you? How do I find the motivation to become a better man? To hike and maybe smash this girl?

[Stavi]

I mean. Okay, there it is.

[Caller 2]

Love you guys. Love the pal.

[Stavi]

See, this is insane. I'm with you because you know what this guy is? This guy is living in an oil field and he's trying to perfect solar power. Right? He needs the motivation. He needs the motivation to lose weight and he's pretending he doesn't want to fuck this girl. My boy, you got. That's the old. What we talking about? Art, Human existence. Everything in history has been done to get pussy. You clearly want to fuck this girl so bad you're fat as shit. You're going to be alone with her for a fucking month on a cross country trip. And that's not the fucking. You're pretending you don't want to fuck her and that'll. That's that mean. That's that mean that's you locking away your oil well. Admit yourself, all you want to do is fuck this woman. You would still get something out of the trip. Don't get me wrong, Even if she doesn't want to, you're not a piece of shit. If she doesn't want to fuck you, you're not going to be an asshole. But admit that to yourself. Start drilling in the fucking Getting pussy oil fields instead of this nebulous like, be a better man. I couldn't possibly stop smoking weed. It would completely disrupt my local economy if I stopped buying eighths from my fucking college dropout friend. Be honest with yourself, ok? Start drilling in the pussy energy well. Ok. And stop pretending you're doing this for moral higher standards. And, and one day you'll get there by the way. Right. Like I, I'm at a place where, look my life. Awesome. I don't need to lose weight other than because I want to live.

[Mandel]

Right.

[Stavi]

But, but that wasn't always the case.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

When I was young and had not the only times I ever lost weight was honestly for a girl or for girls generally. Right.

[Mandel]

I, I, I want, I, I do have a little take here, though. Please.

[Stavi]

That's why you're here.

[Mandel]

Think that I do.

[Stavi]

And we are two different. We do have a different. It's, it's like we have a different operating system in the same model.

[Mandel]

You know what I mean?

[Stavi]

Like we both, we both have. We're. But we're both, it's, we're both like, you know, it's different engines and like, you know, PT Cruisers or whatever. So, so, so I, I am interested to your, for your take. Sure. Because I don't think you have been, you know, you're, you're not as, like we said, horny forward. So let's get your take here.

[Mandel]

Nah. I will say this. I do think that at some point you have to put some value in wanting to lose weight or be healthier for yourself for sure. Because I think that's more sustainable over time than for this particular person. We're in full agreement and I think that the more that you have some more and feel like I am worth whatever that is, whether that be being. I know he said, you know, doing whatever he wants to quit or lose weight or gaining skills or whatever. I think you'll be in less positions where you have to pretend like you don't want to be with this lady. You'll have more opportunity to be around women who like you for you, because you like you for you. You get what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Right? Right? No, no, that's even. You're right.

[Mandel]

Right.

[Stavi]

Even pretending he doesn't want to fuck her is sort of that, oh, what are you guys up to? Why are you guys out smoking weed? That's bad for you. It's the evolved version of that.

[Mandel]

Right. I think you gotta put that value in yourself. You gotta be like, hey man, I like me so much. That I want the best version of me because I deserved it.

[Stavi]

Yes.

[Mandel]

And then I think you'll have less times where you're like trying to figure out these puzzles around. Around anything you want in life because you'll find the value in you first. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

I fully agree. And I do. And that's kind of what I'm saying is like, look, this will not last you. This is not. It is oil versus solar because it is bad for you, it's bad for the environment. It doesn't burn clean. The fuel of either hatred or desire. Most powerful potent fuel. But it's.

[Mandel]

It pollutes absolutely.

[Stavi]

It puts a lot. It does not. When you're like, because. And that's. By the way, all that's what got me here is like, chip on my shoulder. You. You don't you think that motherfucker's better than me? And wanting to get pussy? Without question. The two things that have motivated my success more than anything, at least getting started, are those two. But those fuels do not burn clean. And I have switch since switched over, you know, to a different fuel for myself, for wanting to be myself. But this guy right now, he's just. He's.

[Mandel]

He's out there. So you gotta start where you are.

[Stavi]

You gotta start where he is.

[Mandel]

I get that.

[Stavi]

Right now he needs to start burning the unclean fuel.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Just to get a little heat in the. In the lab, you know what I mean? Right now the lab is dark.

[Mandel]

This is a fair point because I would say with the thing that you do that I think is so cool, is that you inspire people to like themselves where they are.

[Stavi]

Exactly.

[Mandel]

Like you said, you got to pull yourself out. The thing with whatever. Whatever can motivate you first.

[Stavi]

Exactly.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Everybody, you know, you're fucking squirtles right now. You can be fucking blastoise. Yeah, yeah. You're just not there yet, dude. You gotta evolve over time. Just admit who you are. And that's why this man needs to admit who he is. And look at this trip as, yes, use that fuel. Don't be a creep. But also just be like, you know what? I'm going on this awesome trip. I'm a fucking broke piece of it. Sounds like I'm getting to go to England. It's a once in a lifetime thing. That's a very cool trip, by the way. And what did he say when he was going?

[Eldis]

Three or four months from now.

[Stavi]

Okay, so that's the perfect time to go. I've Actually, I was in England. We shot Begonia in like June or whatever the. And I was like, damn, this would be the. You actually want to be in England and Scotland, like July and August, where everybody else is hot as fuck and they're just like 72 degrees and they're like, it's a heat wave, you know. But that's a beautiful trip. Look at it as like, fuck it. I'm going to get. I'm going to start going on. I'm going to start walking. Do the stuff you can do. And by the way, you're not. You don't have the time for a full evolution. This is. You're gonna stay Squirtle. But you could be. What were the Squirt or were they. Who were the Squirtle Club with the guys, the glasses, you remember? They were like a couple cool Squirtles. Do you remember that? No. Were you a Pokemon guy? Mandel.

[Mandel]

I was in Pokemon.

[Stavi]

I believe on the cartoon there was like the Squirtle Club or some. And it was just squirrels wearing sunglasses.

[Eldis]

Squirtle Squad.

[Stavi]

Squirtle Squad. Thank you. This. I backed into this analogy, but it actually works beautifully because right now you're a fucking loser. Squirtle, smoking weed and you're a little too fucking fat. Right. The Squirrel Squad's got sunglasses on. They're. They're, they're slight. So you need to become the Squirtle Squad. You need to be who you are now, but just more confident. And by the way, look at it purely as. I don't want to embarrass myself on these heights.

[Mandel]

Yeah. And I was about to say too. Yeah. I think like, just getting, just. Just getting in a better cardiovascular place than you are right now is good. And take account for what's cool about you right now.

[Stavi]

Yeah.

[Mandel]

Like, I think it's so much focused on what you supposed to change, but I'm pretty sure it's a lot of stuff.

[Stavi]

Highlight now. Yes, I agree.

[Mandel]

That is cool about you.

[Stavi]

Get a couple cool fits. Go to dxl. You're still a dxl. We're not telling you. You're leaving DXL in three months.

[Mandel]

Oh, totally.

[Stavi]

But spend a little cash.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Get a couple cool fits. Start going on walks in the. And by the way, it's hard to get weed in Europe, so this is a good motivation to be like, I don't want to be going through fucking withdrawals.

[Mandel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

I'm going to quit now. And if I want to start smoking Weed again when I get back. I can. But just look, dude, you actually have a really good opportunity to use this as motivation for a number of different things. A, again, I think it's a healthy thing to be like, this is still my friend, even if she doesn't want to smash. You clearly have feelings for this person. Okay? So being honest with yourself is. Is important and providing. And look, whether she likes you or she doesn't like you, you want to put your best foot forward, right? So that's motivation. One, two, is. This is. He's young, right? Did he say how old he was? He sounds young, right? His worldview is quite young. Something you realize even in your 30s is like, oh, there are not unlimited summers. You get like 80 summers. If you're lucky, you're spending one. This might be the coolest summer of your fucking life. It's eligible. And I'm not saying the rest of y' all is gonna suck. I'm saying you're doing something so cool that it's eligible to be the coolest thing you've ever done. So why not be in a little better shape for it? Why not be ready to enjoy the trip as somebody who really has had a good time going to different cities, walking around when I was 300 pounds versus even being 280 now that 20 fucking pounds is a huge difference. The first 5 pounds is a huge difference. The first time you really start walking, you feel it. So I would say look at this. My advice to you to find concrete. To find concrete motivation is just fucking look at this as not I'm going to lose weight. Not I'm going to be the fucking best version of myself. You know, this ain't going to be the best version of you ever. I want to do. I want to be in as good as shape mentally, physically. Yeah. Going into a cool vacation with someone that I'm going to have, that I have feelings for, that I'm going to have a lot of time to connect and see whether there's anything there. Just being the best be. Look at it as just short term motivation for getting the most out of this vacation. Let that be the start and wherever it goes, it goes. Absolutely.

[Mandel]

And this might be a take that I regret. Please tell how you feel, man.

[Stavi]

I agree. I agree.

[Mandel]

How you feel? Don't, don't.

[Stavi]

Don't hide now, now, I would. How long is the trip, elders? Did he say?

[Eldis]

I don't know if he specified it, but yes.

[Stavi]

Maybe at the end of the trip, you know what I mean? I don't know that I would lead with that. I would catch a vibe.

[Mandel]

Now she feels stuck.

[Stavi]

Exactly. Now she feels weird. Now she's like, oh, is this a guy, a fucking creep? Is he gonna try and fuck me? You know, in Dublin or wherever the fuck we're going? I guess he said Scotland and England. Yeah, Glasgow. No, no, no, you're not wrong. You're not wrong. Ultimately, you do need to tell her how you feel and you need to be honest with how you feel. Nobody fucking goes on a two week hiking trip with their pen pal that they're not trying to fuck.

[Mandel]

You know what I mean? And I think, you know, you got to realize that's a little dishonest too, because she may perceive the relationship as platonic. And he.

[Stavi]

Which, listen, it's. But, but I think. But it's important to. First thing he needs to do is be honest with himself. Figure out what your real feelings are. And then after you've kind of, you know, taken a couple practice hikes, he says he's out of breath, you've hit a couple national parks, you've cut the weed back. If not cut it out completely, your diet is a little better because, you know, whatever after that. And then you go on the trip, you have a couple days, you catch a vibe, you feel it out. At the end of the trip, there's nothing wrong with being like. Or when it feels right, being like, hey, I'm having a great time. You know, spending as much time together has made me feel. Has really made me understand my feelings for you. I really. And look at the end of the day, they fucking live across, you know, I don't know where. He didn't give us a lot of detail about who this person is, but

[Eldis]

he did mention they used to work together, but that's all we really know.

[Stavi]

Either way, this is clearly somebody you have feelings for on some level. And I think, don't do it on the first date. Don't fucking go there with a diamond ring in your pocket and try and fucking propose, but feel the vibes out. If it feels right, you can say it earlier, but I think by the end of the trip you should. It's important for you to just express yourself. And even if it doesn't go your way, that's fine. She's still your friend. You had a great trip together and there will be other people that do feel this way about you.

[Mandel]

Absolutely right.

[Stavi]

But I like that advice. I think that is good. Ultimately, at the end of the day, what we need to do is just be as Honest about what we want and our feelings as possible. And that's hard to do.

[Mandel]

Yeah. And have some faith that if you being the best version of you, somebody

[Stavi]

gonna love that version 100% without question. Somebody will love the shittier version of you too.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

I truly. I fucked the most when I was. I was 340.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

My dick didn't even fucking work. But I was just kind of trying to fuck as like the way I did everything. Like. Like the way I was addicted to everything of like pills, food, weed, getting. Trying to as many girls as will let. Like I was just in such a like addict's mind where it was like. And, and. And you will. You can figure it out at the. At your worst. So when you're actually at your. Wherever you are, you can find somebody that believes in you and you can even find people that are on the ups. You know, you. You don't need everything to be perfect for you to find.

[Mandel]

I agree.

[Stavi]

You know, but anyway, that's our advice, little buddy. We're rooting for you. Let it. Honestly, please, please let us know how it goes. This. I would love to even talk to you on a. On a live call because I think there's. There's a lot more that we haven't gotten to here.

[Mandel]

Absolutely.

[Stavi]

This could be. This could. This guy could go in the. In the. In our. He could be another member of the anti incel hall of fame. Who did we have Peach Farmers in?

[Eldis]

Peach Farmers in there.

[Stavi]

And who's the other kid? I forget his name, but he's the man. Remember we talked to him on the road.

[Eldis]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[Stavi]

Was his name. We don't know their real names here.

[Eldis]

I forgot their name.

[Stavi]

But we know you. But you know who we're talking about and we. We need. We do need a couple updates on some of our.

[Eldis]

The guy who tried work on in LA years ago.

[Stavi]

Him too. Yeah, of course.

[Mandel]

Yeah. All right.

[Stavi]

I'll just hit us with another one.

[Caller 1]

Hey, stuff. Big fan of the show, so I'll get right to it. Basically I have a group of college friends. I'm 34. Really. Like the only time I get to see these guys is about once a year. So whenever someone gets married or we have a bachelor party like that and what's going on now is one of the guys in the group, I found out he's getting married. And I found out because another one of the friends texted me and asked if I was going to. And I found out that I didn't get an invite. And basically my question Is. I am wondering, is it cool? Like, I changed my email and I changed my phone number about a year ago, and I'm wondering, is it cool to kind of ask my other friend who told me about the wedding to kind of, like, fish around and see if. If it's possible that maybe, like, he just, like, texted the wrong number. Want to go to a wedding, sent the wrong email. At the same time, I really don't want to seem like I'm fishing for an invite. I mean, I am a little bombed that I didn't get invited, but. But, you know, it's his daughter, and, you know, I respect this decision. And the last thing I would want to do is be at a thing where I'm not wanted. But I love these guys, and I love hanging out with them whenever I get the opportunity to. And I'd be. Be really bummed, especially if I found out that, you know, it's just a misconnection to give a little more context. I mean, we're in a fantasy football group together, and we had to, like, remake the group last year because I changed my number. So that's the thing is, I think that you probably just didn't invite the

[Stavi]

feeling that you changed your email and number.

[Mandel]

No.

[Caller 1]

Maybe there's a misunderstanding.

[Stavi]

I don't know.

[Caller 1]

Just around here a little bit and ask their friends to do a little digging on my behalf just to make sure it's not an understanding. Or would you just say, leave it alone.

[Mandel]

Leave it alone.

[Caller 1]

I appreciate any advice.

[Mandel]

I mean, leave it alone.

[Stavi]

He does. The amount of time he's like, first of all, they've contacted you since. Right. If you change your number a year ago, and this has never come up with the person whose num. Wedding you want to go to.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

You're not close enough. If. If he. If you change your number and he didn't realize until it was time for his wedding, that's kind of a bad sign, man.

[Mandel]

Yeah. I think you gotta leave it alone. I think big league, you know, I think from my own life experience, you do gotta let it be. And you gotta be like, hey, it is what it is.

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

Because I think any other option. Any other option, even if you. You Even if you reach out and they say, oh, my bad, we forgot. It's still. You still kind of know where your relationship.

[Stavi]

Yeah, sure, sure. Like, now, this is funny because I do have friends, too, who have, like, invited people or like, been like, I'm not inviting that guy. And then someone will text him, like, hey, man, I. I'M talking to a bunch of friends who like, the weddings went out and actually I know somebody who didn't go with through a friend, but just texted the guy directly. And my friend just folded immediately and he was like, dude, what? He like, he was like, he got lost. And so like, there's a little bit of that, there's a little bit of social pressure. Now this is an interesting question because I agree that, I mean, clearly, again, this guy's feelings are really hurt and he can't admit that. Just admit that that's okay. It's okay for your feelings to be hurt. Anytime you're talking about email or phone number though, it's like, oh, it's like she's probably busy. That's why she's not texting me back. Like, this is the, this is the classic Trill Withers tweet. She's just having, she'll text you back, bro, she's just having a little sex or whatever. Clack. I don't, I want to get the wording just right. If you could look that up. Eldest. But it's like dog, I don't think it's a fucking. It's your email or phone number. Now I will say that if you trust your friend's sort of spy capabilities, if you trust your friend's ability to get some recon, I don't know that. But it's very, it's very friend specific, right? And they would have to be very slick with it, it to not embarrass you because I think the odds that this is some kind of misunderstanding are very low. So unless you have like the suavest James Bond ass friend who it doesn't seem like you do, I could see trying to figure out what happened here or like, or trying to get. Because this is kind of juicy gossip. When a friend of a, When a friend gets left out of a wedding invite, your friends are going to talk about it. Like again, if me and Eldis and our friend group of like, you know, five or six friends that are tight, if one of those friends didn't invite one of the others to a wedding, it would be a topic of discussion, you know what I mean? And Elvis did have a very small wedding and people's feelings didn't get hurt really. But it was funny to joke about who got invited and who didn't. And you know, in our, in the, in Stavi baby Enterprise in particular, it was funny. Eldis invited one of our co workers at. As a joke. Remember we sent him the invite an hour before the wedding, like, hey man, I really hope you can make it a little last minute ceremony, which was funny as hell. So I think there is a way to at least figure out what happened. Cuz there is some explanation here and the explanation is misunderstanding. I would put it 4% and that's pretty generous, right?

[Mandel]

Right.

[Stavi]

Let's say it's a solid. Let's give you 5%. But the other options, the devastating options are he doesn't really like you that much. Right. Then the other thing is the partner, right? Like she's just like, I don't fucking want this guy there. Or what probably happened is they probably don't have that many spots and they just. You made the long list. But when it was time to make some difficult cuts, the guy, the two guys we like least in fantasy football, they're the ones who get cut from the wedding, right?

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Probably what it is is actually the most devastating thing, which is not he has some secret hatred for you or that he's harboring some secret or that his wife secretly hates you. It's actually a little more devastating just B, realize you're a B minus, C plus friend in this guy's life and he doesn't even not want you around. You might even get invited to the bachelor party. You might get invited to the auxiliary bachelor party. You might. You don't get to stay in the house, but you get to go to topgolf or whatever the fuck. Right? That's probably what's happening. So do I think doing a little recon is the worst thing in the world? No, I just think realistically, brace yourself for the fact that you just didn't make the cut. Whatever. Hat whatever happens from there, happens from there. I say, you know, does this shed some light on your relationships? Do the people you find to be your close friends not think of you that way? This is a moment of reflection for that for sure.

[Mandel]

And I do feel like, man, but that's the thing too. I'm like, does he really benefit from that investigation though?

[Stavi]

No, he doesn't benefit from it.

[Mandel]

You know what I'm saying? Cause I'm like, I'm like, if you. I feel like I think you could just take it for what it is and then like you said, put more into the relationships that you see. I guess like a more fruitful bond with. You know what I'm saying?

[Stavi]

Sure.

[Mandel]

You can get down to the nitty gritty and be like, well, one time in the fantasy football, I said his hairline was crooked. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can figure that out. Or you can be like, oh, this cat wife don't like me. Or like you said, you was at the cut, but none of those things fixed the issue, which is you thought you was closer with somebody that you.

[Stavi]

That's a good point. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's a good point. And, yeah, maybe if you want to have it now, the Zen approach has been like, oh, okay, they didn't have room. Who cares? And you don't let that affect you at all.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

Which I think is probably the best thing to do. And he might even grow to regret not inviting you.

[Mandel]

Oh, man.

[Stavi]

Is that Norman?

[Eldis]

I don't know.

[Stavi]

Yeah, next week, Mark Norman will be here. Yeah, he's getting here early. We're going to hang out for a week straight so that we have really good chemistry on the pod. Well, I guess that's going to do it for us. I didn't. We're having such a fun time. Come on in. What's up, buddy? Yep. Thank you. So, yeah, Mark's here for a week. We're going to hang out and really get in the zone for next week's episode. But, yeah, we fig. I think we figured out with that guy.

[Mandel]

Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

[Stavi]

You know, don't. Don't invite your phone. You got to take a piss, dude. Go. Go in there. Yeah. Mandel. Thanks for coming, brother.

[Mandel]

Thanks for having me.

[Stavi]

This is so fun.

[Mandel]

I enjoy this program a lot.

[Stavi]

You're. Well, you're. We'll have you back. Absolutely. And we will do the tournament of the dessert. We got to come up with the right acronym.

[Mandel]

The dessert tournament.

[Stavi]

The dessert tournament. The dt. The we got. We get with D and T is a nice beginning and end.

[Mandel]

Yeah.

[Stavi]

To dart. Can we do dessert appreciation? We'll figure it out. Dart is cool. Something fat. Something that sounds delicious. Anyway, we're not going to come up with it right now, but. But happy 420. Everyone legalize it. You know, keep playing two joints by Sublime.

[Mandel]

Yeah. If you rock it with reefer, go ahead and do your reefer thing.

[Stavi]

That's right. That's right. That's right.

[Mandel]

Do the reefer thing.

[Stavi]

What should we plug? What should we plug here?

[Mandel]

Shoot five.

[Stavi]

Mandal online. We'll fucking.

[Mandel]

Yeah. Go. The Big Fun network on YouTube. Love that. I got a program called Big Biz. Watch that.

[Stavi]

Really funny. Very funny videos. The Big Biz videos.

[Mandel]

Finding out with me and Rob Hayes.

[Stavi]

Oh, hell yeah. I love Rob and.

[Mandel]

Yeah, that's it right now.

[Stavi]

Hell, yeah. Check out Mandal. One of the funniest guys and we will talk to you guys next week. Bye Bye. Out on the road, it's nice to have a partner who can help you make the most of your journey. A partner like the Love's Rewards app. With Love's Rewards along for the ride, you earn points on food, fuel, drinks and more every time you scan. Then you can spend those points at Love's just like cash, so every stop is even more rewarding. Download the app today and watch the points roll in mile after mile. Love's Rewards save and earn at every turn. Terms apply.

[Mandel]

See website for details.

[Stavi]

Hey listeners, Stavi here. Thank you for tuning into Stavi's World each week. If you want to hear new episodes ad free, subscribe to SiriusXM Podcast+ on Apple Podcasts or visit SiriusXM.com PodcastPlus to listen with Spotify or another app of your choice.