#178 - Mark Normand

Summary

Stavvy’s World #178: Mark Normand (April 27, 2026)

Episode Overview

Comedians Stavros Halkias and Mark Normand dive deep into the joys and struggles of stand-up life, nostalgia for their early comedy days, their evolving careers, personal insecurities, and the peculiarities of fame, relationships, and vices. They candidly reminisce about formative years, analyze what “the best year” really means, tackle classic and timely comic themes, and offer their signature advice to caller questions about tricky life and work situations. The conversation is loose, raunchy, funny, self-reflective, and at times, surprisingly touching.

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Main Themes & Key Moments

Early Comedy Days, Nostalgia, and Friendship

[03:10-08:38]

• Stavros and Mark reminisce about their rise through the Baltimore comedy scene, playing seedy bars while drinking and hustling, and the feeling of having "nothing to lose."
• They share stories about gigs before "making it," the hope and excitement of being on the brink, and how innocence and possibility can at times eclipse later achievements.
• Stavros: “There’s something about that… How intoxicating potential is. You don’t have to do anything, you just have to maybe do something.” [08:16]
• Mark reflects on moving up with Amy Schumer, relationship changes, and a period of freedom and fun before settling down.

Measuring Your “Best Year”

[06:40-17:31]

• Stavros, Mark, and producer Eldis consider what was the best year of their lives—and why.
• Mark: “Hope is the best hope because, you know, we’ve all made it, but you’re still not as happy as you are when you’re about to make it. The journey is what it’s all about.” [08:30]
• The gang debates happiness, professional milestones, personal growth, and the richness of being carefree and broke.

The Psychosexual Politics of Ice Cream (and Other Addictions)

[18:29–23:45]

• Extended bit on Stavros' former ice cream addiction as a stand-in for all self-destructive vices, with Mark riffing on personal willpower and childhood bodega habits.
• Mark: “Someone that doesn’t menstruate—that is a lot of ice cream.” [18:59]
• Discussion about nostalgia, using “Halo Top as methadone,” and how food can fill deeper emotional gaps.
• Gandolfini’s last meal: Both comics joke about how comforting the idea is, the morbid romance of indulgence, and slow-motion self-sabotage: “Being fat is kind of coward suicide.”

Mortality, Recklessness & Fatherhood

[26:20-28:35]

• Mark admits to reckless behaviors (driving drunk, no helmets) and is surprisingly unconcerned with his own health, only recently checking himself after becoming a father: “I had no reason to live before, you know, I just want to come up with a new bit, have a cocktail. But now…I should eat right.”
• Narratives about dangerous incidents (bike crash, getting doored), responsibility, and how children begin to change (some) comedians' calculation of risk.

On Cops, Edgelord Comedy, and Social Taboos

[28:13-31:17]

• Mark tells the story of being pulled over for drunk driving and being recognized by a cop, who asked for a joke in exchange for letting him off. Only a trans joke lands.
• They riff on what cop/blue-collar culture finds funny: “We can track what’s hack in real time!” [29:08]
• Discussion of how the punching-down joke target has shifted over generations (Polish, black, blondes, trans folks) and predictions for what’s next.

Hairlines, Plug Technology, and Vanity

[31:29–34:45]

• The comedians dissect hair loss, hair plugs, and the pressure to match up on TV.
• Mark: “I’m waiting for [hair plugs] to come down, like a flat screen…”
• Musings on being cheap vs. clueless with money, with confessions about personal finance blind spots and cautionary tales about show business naivety.

Old Hollywood & Comedy Heroes: Louie Anderson

[37:01-42:16]

• Extended discussion of Louie Anderson: his influence, struggles as a closeted comic, scandals, and how even open, lovable figures got preyed upon or exploited in the industry.
• “Louie Anderson is the man—that pisses me the fuck off!” [40:22]
• Reminiscences about “fat kid representation” in TV shows and movies—and how little there really was.

Famously Fucked Up Kids: Pageants, Pedophilia, and Nepotism

[43:05–46:06]

• A dark but funny tangent on why children’s pageants are toxic, how child acting is a pipeline to trauma, and the twisted incentives that put kids in harm’s way.
• Mark (in character): "I've got a fantasy football league going with spreadsheets [for pageant kids]."

Presidential Failsons, Power, and Vice

[46:11–49:29]

• They riff on Trump and Biden’s sons—Hunter and Don Jr.—and which one would be more fun to party with. Both agree Hunter is the clear winner, and that the tabloid “fail son” is a more relatable archetype.

Showbiz Insecurity, Movie Sets vs. Stand-Up & Self-Reflection

[53:28–62:44]

• Stavros shares feelings of imposter syndrome working among serious actors and how stand-up’s brutal honesty inoculates you for less-competitive creative fields.
• Both comics confess to difficulty taking breaks, fearing irrelevance, and using constant motion to avoid self-reflection.
• Stavros: “The worst thing is you do the math and you’re like, wait, is my career directly detrimental to my happiness?” [62:09]

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Notable Quotes

• On Hope vs. Achievement:

  • “Hope is the best. Because you know, we've all made it, but you're still not as happy as you are when you were about to make it. The journey is what it's all about.” – Mark [08:30]

• On Addictions:

  • “When it's all said and done, [ice cream] is my greatest addiction.” – Stavros [21:26]

• On Cop Humor:

  • “I told a black joke, he didn’t laugh. I told a gay joke, he didn’t laugh. I told a trans joke and he died. And he’s like, get the hell out of here.” – Mark [29:08]

• On Stand-Up Life vs. Acting:

  • “In stand-up you bomb so much…even your friends will roast you to smithereens. When you’re just on a place where people have to be professional…it’s easy.” – Stavros [56:35]

• On Avoiding Self-Reflection:

  • “I think what you're describing is staying in the anxiety of it means you never have to reflect. Because you're constantly in the rat race…If you took two weeks off, you'd have to think about yourself.” – Stavros [60:13]

• On Polyamory and Communication:

  • “You don't want to fuck your husband, and somebody else is doing it, and you have to turn them down a few times. You're good. You're cruising.” – Mark [98:21]

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Advice Segment Highlights

(1:06:45–1:14:10)
Caller: Student teacher wants to (respectfully) date a student’s 25-year-old sister.

• Stavros: “Having a child you teach set you up—that’s the weird part…You cannot be a teacher who gets their 12-year-old student to set you up with someone.”
• Both agree there’s nothing criminal about dating a student’s adult relative, so long as it happens organically—Stavros urges extreme caution about even the perception of impropriety.

(1:16:56–1:28:11)
Caller: Business founder’s partner starts dating a problematic employee, tanking company morale.

• Their take: Approach as a friend first—“What happened, man?”—then professionally: “Anything that happens with her is on you. If she tries to sue, you gotta deal with that.”
• If things can’t be worked out, be prepared to cut him out for the good of all. “If he takes that personally…that was your attempt at being the bigger man.”

(1:30:01–1:38:52)
Caller: Polyamorous wife dislikes being propositioned by her husband's girlfriends.

• Mark: “Nothing to complain about!”
• Stavros, more reflective: “Are you happy? Is this just who you are, or are you suppressing something deeper?” Both urge honest self-reflection and simple communication.

(1:39:30–1:46:07)
Caller: Should I pass down my “funny-sounding” generational family name that’s helped me in life, even if my wife hates it?

• Both hosts enthusiastically say yes—keep the name! Family tradition counts unless it’s legitimately traumatic.
• Stavros: “The idea that I had Dick Hammer in my family, and I willingly chose not to bestow that on my son, that pisses me the fuck off.” [103:08]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [03:10] – Baltimore comedy memories/featuring for Schumer
• [06:40] – Best year of your life discussion
• [18:29] – Ice cream addiction as a vice
• [26:20] – Mortality & living recklessly
• [28:13] – Mark’s cop story and trans jokes
• [31:29] – Hair loss & plugs
• [37:01] – Louie Anderson history
• [43:05] – Pageants & child star trauma
• [46:11] – Trump/Biden fail sons chat
• [53:28] – Stavros on acting vs stand-up
• [60:13] – On taking breaks and self-reflection
• [66:45] – Advice segment begins
• [1:06:45] – Student teacher/older sibling dating dilemma
• [1:16:56] – Business partner dating employee crisis
• [1:30:01] – Poly couples and sexual boundaries
• [1:39:30] – Family name inheritance debate

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Tone & Style

• Conversational, loose, profane, riff-heavy—like hanging out in a green room with two veteran comics.
• Warm, self-deprecating, occasionally tender.
• Blunt honesty balanced with humor and absurd bits.
• A mix of grounded, street-smart advice and comedic exaggeration.

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Memorable Moments

• Mark’s “I drive drunk, don’t wear helmets, do a lot of drugs...I should worry, but I don’t.”
• Stavros comparing his ice cream “will” to morbid thoughts of Gandolfini’s last meal.
• Louie Anderson’s story of blackmail and elder abuse.
• Extended riff on child pageants as “theater systems for pedophiles.”
• Mark’s cop story about hack jokes and what “kills” in a cop car.
• Group psychoanalysis of their own inability to take a break from stand-up—“If you took two weeks off, you'd have to think about yourself.”

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For Listeners: Should You Tune in?

If you crave a mix of hilarious reminiscences, authentic laments about showbiz, biting social commentary, and genuinely useful advice, this episode is a top-tier hang with two of the sharpest working comics today. The intimate tone, confessions, and inside-baseball tangents make it fun for comedy nerds and accessible for new listeners alike.

Transcript

[Stavros Halkias]

Pacifico, the crisp Mexican lager that wasn't brewed to blend in. We were made for the moments when you live like you mean it. When you don't just hear the music, you feel it. When you let the bonfire burn into the night and find places you'd never spot on a map. So when the moment calls, choose to reach for the bright yellow can. Choose yellow. Choose Pacifico 21 Discover responsibly. Pacifico Clara beer, imported by Crown Imports, Chicago, Illinois. A text says you're on my mind. A bouquet from 1-800-FLowers says, you're my everything.

[Mark Norman]

Heartfelt moments belong in the real world, not just your phone.

[Stavros Halkias]

For 50 years, 1-800-Flowers has helped millions of people make memories that'll last a lifetime with gifts they'll cherish forever. Their expertly curated arrangements and gift baskets shipped nationwide with a 100% satisfaction guarantee. Don't wait for the next big moment. Make it. When you visit 1-800-flowers.com sxm today, that's 1-800-flowers. Com sxm. Welcome, everybody. To stop his world. Nine hundred and four, eight hundred, stop. Call in. We'll solve all your problems. We've got our boy Mark Norman returning to the couch. Special on Netflix. It's been out for two months. At this point, as we all know, you got to get that late April bump.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

When you're promoting a special, what you need is after it's out of the top 10.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

To just get it. Maybe 300 more views.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Thank you. Perfect. We're on YouTube soon, so. But, yeah. Thank you. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Watch the special. None too pleased. Very funny stuff. Yeah. Thanks for coming, buddy. Thanks for being back on the program.

[Mark Norman]

Thanks for having me. Great upgrade with the apartment. This place is sick. You're in Manhattan.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm in Manhattan.

[Mark Norman]

Your. Your doorman's a little annoying, but we had a great time.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's the man.

[Mark Norman]

He's cool. He's cool.

[Stavros Halkias]

He really is. I would ra. I like someone attentive.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. He's on it because he is. He.

[Stavros Halkias]

He fudgeing. Knows it. He'll chat with you. And if he was bad at his job, it's the most annoying thing of all time. If he's good at his job, you get warm when you. It's like. It's like a family member. That's good versus bad.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's like, listen, if you. My mom calls me all the time. It's like. It's my mother. She's done everything for me. It's like, do I re. Do I have. Do I want to pause what I'm doing and talk to her right now? No, but it's my mother. Whatever. But then it's like some uncle calls you. You just some piece of. From the motherland needing money.

[Mark Norman]

Please don't report me. Those are tough, tough times. It was the 80s, but. Yeah. Your mom won't stop calling me. It's the whole thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

But.

[Mark Norman]

No, I know what you mean, but he saw me dealing with the. The box outside, looking for your name. And he was like, what are you doing? I was like, I'm going to see Stavros. And he's like, yeah, he's a celebrity. And I'm like, I know, I know, I know. I've known him before that. I was around in Cub down, baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

Pre Come down. You. I was. Remember that gig we did in. I opened for you. You were opening for Schumer, and it was a bar. Yes, In Fell's Point.

[Mark Norman]

I remember that.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was a. I believe, Delia Foley's, if I'm not mistaken. So you weren't headlining.

[Mark Norman]

No.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's how much we've actually known each other.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Is that. You were like featuring. Transitioning to headlining.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I was like, featuring solidly.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's when we like. And then. Yes, that was a very funny. That was a hilarious gig too, because it was just like you, you know,

[Mark Norman]

and we just got hammered.

[Stavros Halkias]

We got.

[Mark Norman]

That's all you did back then. Because we were all sad.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. But we had some good times.

[Stavros Halkias]

We had some great times.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That was fun shit. A shitty Baltimore fucking bar, getting drunk as hell. And then I. Was I living with my parents.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Nothing to lose back then. You were like, yeah, I talked to Bobby Kelly. I think. I think I'm gonna go on the road with him. This is. I was like, whoa, wait a minute. Quit bragging. Holy. Nothing going on.

[Stavros Halkias]

What a beautiful, innocent time.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Yeah. Baltimore was cool, but I did a guy. A show in a guy's house. He had like a three story crazy house. And it.

[Stavros Halkias]

That. We did that show too. That was. I took you to that show.

[Mark Norman]

That was. Yeah. That was amazing.

[Stavros Halkias]

That was really fun. Shout out friend of the show, Peter Muth.

[Mark Norman]

He's been on the show.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. That house was awesome, dude. That was like. They had like, just. Some guy owned it and it was like just a. It was like the classic. It's like when a rich kid, like, puts his powers to use for good.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

When it's like, hey, I've got the resources. I'm buying A house. And I'm not gonna be, because there's nothing worse than when, like, fucking rich kid would remind you whose Nintendo 64 was when they're like, when they're getting bullied because their personality's bad, you know, like, okay, I guess we won't play my Donkey Kong Country.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that was the worst.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, you're like, oh, no, no, it's okay, dude. We'll we. We were joking about wanting to your mom.

[Mark Norman]

I had a friend with GoldenEye. If you started beating him, you would just unplug it. And I was like, you're a school shooter before school. Shoot. You're a terrorist. He was the worst.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's the worst. But this guy had a little money, bought a. And let the. Let the boys hang out, had great parties.

[Mark Norman]

It was a fixer upper, but it was fun. It was just beer everywhere. I. Dude made out with a girl in the bathroom.

[Caller]

I remember.

[Stavros Halkias]

Love that.

[Mark Norman]

That was fun. Fun times.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I, Yeah, I, I. That. How that part. That house was maybe one of the first places I had, like, confidence separate from anything, you know where it was. Like, that was. I remember, like, getting to girls from parties at that house and being like, whoa, I'm not a fat gay loser anymore. I can get a girl with big tits to come to my shitty apartment. That was to come to my shitty To. Or like, the first time, you're like, want to get. The first time you say, want to get out of here? And it works.

[Mark Norman]

It works. Yeah. You want to go watch TV?

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm like, 22, and I'm like, want to get out? I don't believe it. I'm like, oh, my voice is cracking. Want to get out of here?

[Mark Norman]

That was great. The first time you start getting laid after parties, you're like, oh, getting drunk was fun, but this is. This is what I want to do.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is better. I should stay sober and get them drunk. Maybe even get, like, I don't know, some kind of medicine that gets them drunk faster.

[Mark Norman]

You put on a Cosby record.

[Stavros Halkias]

Joke. Satire. Satire. We are not rapists of any sort.

[Mark Norman]

Humor. Humor, folks. It's good for you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. Oh, man, now you're. Now you're putting me down memory lane, too. That. What would you say is the best year of your life if you had to pick one year?

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that's tough, man.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it's a tough one because, you know, you've obviously accomplished playing stuff, and even in the special, great special about having a kid, there's so much good material there, you know, you've accomplished professionally, personally, shit's going good. But when you have to boil down. And there's different metrics too. Right. There's like pure happiness.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's being carefree. Because those years, mine might be the year we met when I was living in. My friends. My friends were letting me live in a subsidized house.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Where it was like, they literally just Let me pay 300 worth of rent.

[Mark Norman]

Hell, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was like, guys, that's all I can afford. And, and. And basically my pitch was, you want 400 more a month, but the guy could be annoying.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or do you want the. The I'm the best hang of all time, baby. And they went for it. And shout out to them. They're shout out to straight George. Friend of the program, was one of the original patron.

[Mark Norman]

And was there a gay George?

[Stavros Halkias]

No. But if you met George, you'd know why he's called straight George.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because you have to let people know he's straight.

[Mark Norman]

Got it, Got it. Effeminate man. Got it. Got it. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I won't dox the other person, but may we should come up with a nickname for him as well, because he. We got to get him in the mix a little bit. My old. My old roommate from that year in Baltimore. Very. I don't want to give away his personal information until I know he's cool with it, but we had a very funny setup. And anyway, there's something about that, to me, that was like. I don't know, there's like the. How intoxicating potential is. You don't have to do anything. You just have to maybe do something.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

So it's like, I'm like, dude, I'm. Yeah. Like you said, dude. Bobby Kelly might let me open. Yeah. I get to. I get to share a best western with Chris Scopo. You know, I get to get the laugh. I get to do seven at Laugh Boston.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that was. Yeah. Hope is the best hope because, you know, we've all made it, but it's. You're still not as happy as you are when you. We're about to make.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, exactly.

[Mark Norman]

The journey is what it's all about.

[Stavros Halkias]

And not even a lot of the journey actually sucks dick.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course there's four good parts of the journey. You know, it's like, it's not even. It's the journeys of destination. Like, no, they're both dog. But you're. You're happy, like for four days out of the 25 year journey.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. It's the Little wins. You get laid here. You have a great night here. It's kind of like when you. You driving to get coke. It's almost more fun than the coke.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, the second you're the. When you're in the car, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You're like, whoa, baby, what are we gonna do?

[Stavros Halkias]

And then you're sad as afterwards.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah. Then you hate yourself the next day. You know that, but regret.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I spent 12 hours talking about Donkey Kong in a. In a hotel room with four other guys. We all offered drugs to the one hot girl. She did a. A line and left. And then it was just us talking about GameCube.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I don't know. I don't know. I. I just like it. I like. I like game better. It doesn't matter. All right, fine. You're a PlayStation guy. I'm a Nintendo guy.

[Mark Norman]

You know, I love Mario. You get the three red shells. You're unbeatable. I play with Yoshi. Yeah. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dude. Being such a loser that you're doing coke or Adderall. I remember doing this exact thing happening at a party and then me being like, oh, nice. I feel like, you know, I tried. I snorted Adderall for the first time in. In college, and I'm feeling like, you know, you're buzzing. You're like, this is awesome. I'm gonna fucking party all night. And I just ended up truly playing gamecube upstairs. Upstairs where you go to smoke weed?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, Usually you go.

[Stavros Halkias]

You go in. You smoke weed in the one room at the college house, right? And you. And you leave and you try and get pussy. Whatever I got. I was on Adderall, I smoked weed, and I just truly played fucking Mario Kart.

[Mark Norman]

I bet you had a good time, though.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was okay into it, but it

[Mark Norman]

was one of those.

[Stavros Halkias]

But it was one of those where it's like, you're like, oh, yeah, Would I play, like, two games of Mario Kart? And you're like, 4:30.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Where are the girls? I don't even like these guys. I just got in the zone.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. What do you say when you go downstairs? Like, where. They're like, where the Were you? You're like, I was trying to get. You know, you can't say I was playing GameCube for four hours.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was playing GameCube. Yeah, you just go downstairs. It's one fat guy playing an acoustic guitar and, like, just guys making out in the. In the kitchen. You're like, ah, fuck. Yeah, that's. Yeah, dude, that. There's something about the Client. Truly. I think that because to me, I keep coming back to that one year in Baltimore.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Where it's like right before I move.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm making friends with other comics. Like the fact that because when you're in a small town, you think you might be funny, but then when you like comics that you like think are good actually tell you that. Yeah, that's big.

[Mark Norman]

You know what I mean? Huge. That's huge. Anytime because you're just swimming and nothing. You're like, am I good? Good, Am I bad? What is going on? Am I ever gonna make it? You have no like, no lifeline. So when anybody said like, hey, you got something? Or that's a great bit, you're like, oh, thank you.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then that feeds into just your light, your per, your like confidence as a guy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So then. And then you're like, oh yeah, this is awesome. It's. It's second semester senior year stuff too where it's like senioritis. Especially when you're going to go from a small city to a big city and then, you know, you move to New York. You want to kill yourself for a decade.

[Mark Norman]

Sure, sure, man.

[Stavros Halkias]

That year in Baltimore.

[Mark Norman]

Oh. Because it's all up. Everything's up. And you, I don't know about you. My imagination is so gay. I'm like picturing me killing there and like Todd Berry high fiving me and a guy with a cigar with his feet up going, you got it, kid. You know, Meanwhile, I bought, I bought in New York for like two years.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Because I was doing rough rooms. And I remember one time I went on stage and I was just doing Seinfeld for the first year and this guy went, I was walking to the mic and he goes. And it crushed me. I was crush. Because he got me right to the. Corey. Nailed it. And I was like, you're right. I just went off on him on the mic and how dare you.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm a totally different kind of comic.

[Mark Norman]

What's the deal with. Yeah, I didn't break in New York like out of my bullshit, like rolled up sleeves. What's the deal with. Till a guy heckled me and I called him out and that was working. So that's kind of how I broke free of that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fucking. Yeah, it is very funny how depressing the first couple years are, but.

[Mark Norman]

Oh yeah. So what, what do you think?

[Stavros Halkias]

Me? I was a bedbug.

[Mark Norman]

Really?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, it's hell.

[Stavros Halkias]

It sucks. I'm still like paranoid.

[Mark Norman]

You wake up like a non vet

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I bought my first non metal bed this year. It's been 10 years and for like five years I would wake up and be like, I got him. Yeah, I got him.

[Mark Norman]

Totally.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it, it will with you forever.

[Mark Norman]

But I thought I had an std. I went to the, the hospital because I didn't know about bedbugs. And he was like, I don't know. I think you're fine, cuz I had them all over here.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, interesting.

[Mark Norman]

All the legs. And I was like, oh, this is bad. And I give you a biopsy, but you don't have health care. It's gonna be like two grand.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh my God.

[Mark Norman]

Two grand? Jesus. A biopsy meaning like they, they take a sample and examine it and all this. And I was like, it, let's do it. And I like went into my savings or whatever.

[Stavros Halkias]

God. To find out you have bedbugs to find out.

[Mark Norman]

He's like, yeah, it's a bite. It's a mosquito bite. I was like, me, I wish I had an std, you cunt.

[Stavros Halkias]

Also, what kind of STD are you thinking is on your thigh? Like just, you got rotten juice on your thighs.

[Mark Norman]

I didn't know. I didn't know because you know, I was hooking up with some real trash.

[Stavros Halkias]

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[Mark Norman]

Ooh, do you have one?

[Stavros Halkias]

Because I do think my answer probably would be the year I'm 24. Right before I moved to New York.

[Mark Norman]

Is your best year.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think just pure happiness.

[Mark Norman]

That's pretty good.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was broke as I had no money. I'm eating beans and I would cook beans and eggs in the oven.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it was quicker and I eat off the aluminum foil. It was like what I could afford.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And chicken thighs. That was like when I wanted splurge, I would have chicken thighs.

[Mark Norman]

I still buy that rack of frozen ones and the wife cooks them up. It's amazing. But yeah, that's pretty. I might go 2011.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Mark Norman]

That was a good year. I like started opening for Schumer, quit my job. I gotta the cellar in about 2013 and I was doing the road. She gotten up to arenas.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh.

[Mark Norman]

So I was, you know, get laid by, you know, arena gals and that was pretty great.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were in like an 8 year relationship too or.

[Mark Norman]

No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

You broken it off.

[Mark Norman]

I dated a girl for like 10 years. High school sweetheart, college sweetheart, moved to New York together, did comedy. She hated it. That broke us up. I was single for like four years. I went apeshit. And then.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You know, that's.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's a great time to be single. Is opening for Amy Schumer and Arenas because.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, she can't him.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You know, so that was exciting. Yeah. Oh ye. Yeah. Just private. Everything was crazy and new and she paid so well. I bought an apartment off the money she paid me. Yeah. Like so that was good times that I met the. Eventually met the future Mrs. Norman.

[Stavros Halkias]

Look at that.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, that's beautiful. So I had a good. I had a Good run. It was, it was a roller coaster.

[Stavros Halkias]

Eleven. That's nice.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. If I had to pinpoint it. And I was at the Cellar every night and just, you know, Sam's there and list is there. We're all hanging out. It was, it was a good, good core crew.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Elders, do you have a one year that stands out to you?

[Eldis]

Honestly? The year when I was working at CBS Radio.

[Stavros Halkias]

I remember that year. We were roommates.

[Eldis]

Yeah, that was like just such a nothing job. And I. And I had just a very productive like three to six months where I was like legit exercising. Just went to like monk borderline incel mode.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then you met your wife then.

[Eldis]

Then I met my wife soon after that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Eldis]

So that was a pretty good time in my life. I fucked with that.

[Stavros Halkias]

You were happy. That is true.

[Eldis]

I was happy.

[Stavros Halkias]

You could dip into getting high and eating Ben and Jerry's whenever you wanted to because I was there holding that down. Still for sure. I was still depressed while you were coming out of it.

[Mark Norman]

And you just had the Ben and Jerry's already.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dude, we had the Ben and Jerry's in that house was up.

[Eldis]

There were.

[Stavros Halkias]

I had no money and I probably spent.

[Mark Norman]

I mean, not cheap. Those jokes.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's not at the time. They're probably at the time. This is almost ten years ago. Six bucks probably for like the. For like the pint. The pint.

[Mark Norman]

That's a lot.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I'm probably averaging 20amonth and that's that Maybe that's might be low end. If we're being honest. That might be on the low end.

[Mark Norman]

Someone that doesn't menstruate. That is a lot of ice cream.

[Stavros Halkias]

So that's a hundred. That's 180. Let's just, let's say 200. 200amonth when my rent was $500. Oh my God. I've never done the numbers. My rent was 500 and my ice cream budget was 200 and I made no money.

[Mark Norman]

Oh my God, your crush. It was like the way Shane is with Bud Lights. You're doing pints.

[Eldis]

It was a bloodbath in there. Your Ben and Jerry's pine was never safe enough.

[Stavros Halkias]

Never, never.

[Eldis]

I would never hesitate, especially when I was like high as at night. I was like, I'll have a couple prison rules.

[Stavros Halkias]

It was prison rules.

[Eldis]

And I was like, well, what's the worst that could happen? I'll just go to the grocery store and get another one.

[Mark Norman]

If he gives a. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's great. Oh, yeah. You're like norm at the bodega, you know, they're like,

[Stavros Halkias]

no. You know, I never settled into my. The right ice cream spot. I always had to look at five different. I had like a network of bodegas I would go to.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Some of them didn't have the good shit. I like, truly knew when, like, my bodega got ice cream shop shipments.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, I. I knew when.

[Mark Norman]

This is like Miami drug, you know? You know, when the chopper's coming in,

[Stavros Halkias]

I was like, oh, we're behind. It's like, don't. Don't go to the corner.

[Eldis]

They don't have anything except strawberry cheesecake.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

[Mark Norman]

The chunky monkey. There's a one called like, Late night something.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tonight Dough.

[Mark Norman]

Tonight dough.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who are you talking to? And later they would make a variant called Netflix and Chilled. That was very similar to that.

[Mark Norman]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I love. Actually, that was more chunky. That was more chubby hubby.

[Mark Norman]

Got it.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was a chubby hubby guy, and Netflix and Chilled had some similar core elements.

[Mark Norman]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

So you listen. You ever want to talk Ben and Jerry's, we're the guys.

[Mark Norman]

Do you go cream based or do you. Or like vanilla base or chocolate based?

[Stavros Halkias]

It depends. I probably find myself gravitating chocolate or. Or something interesting.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's what I liked about the chubby Hubby. It was malt flavored ice cream, so it wasn't quite vanilla. It was vanilla with a little twist.

[Mark Norman]

Got it.

[Stavros Halkias]

They also had the Coors at the time. In fact, now I walk by a freezer and I see the new stuff that I missed out on, and it really makes me feel nostalgic.

[Mark Norman]

What do you gave up? It's not too late.

[Stavros Halkias]

I can't.

[Mark Norman]

You can have a taste, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

I cannot. If I let that back into my life. You have no. I. I really think ice cream is my will. When it all is said and done is my greatest addiction.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

When it's all. When I really think about how many times in my life, what I can give up the easiest. It was weed for a long time. Food, I guess, in general. But if we really boil it down to the type, the. The food. That's the problem. It's the fact that at night I can tack on anywhere from 300 to 3,000 calories.

[Mark Norman]

Sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

In desserts only.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

And so I think, like, dude, there's a. Like. Like even there was like. There's like been years of my life where I still have ice cream almost every day, but it's halo Top. Like, I've been on methadone.

[Mark Norman]

What's that?

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a locale. Oh, it's not good.

[Mark Norman]

It doesn't taste good.

[Stavros Halkias]

But it's about horrible. It's about the ritual of eating an entire pint.

[Mark Norman]

You ever do the thing where you eat it with a fork and you kind of skim the top and you think you're eating less? You're still just there for an hour and a half. Yeah, yeah. It still goes down that much, but you're like.

[Stavros Halkias]

Well, then you can. You can dislodge the. The brownie bits easier.

[Mark Norman]

God, you're talking like Charlie Sheen in the documentary.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, it really is the. The way. Yes, truly, Charlie. That's. That's what's in my. Like, I bought. Hopefully what. What will say I've given up on quitting ice cream, and I bought one of the Ninja Creamy machines where you can make your own ice cream bases.

[Mark Norman]

Well, no, you're making it at home,

[Stavros Halkias]

but you can make. You make it from, like, a protein shake.

[Mark Norman]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's like 250 calories.

[Mark Norman]

All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

But it's a whole. It's a whole pint.

[Mark Norman]

Got it.

[Stavros Halkias]

So, anyway, we'll see. We'll. I'll keep you updated.

[Mark Norman]

Okay. Okay. I'm just worried you're gonna pull a. Like a Matthew Perry in a hot tub. He's gonna have one last night. It's gonna be all these canisters.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm not kidding. The hearing about Gandolfini's last meal.

[Mark Norman]

They have the meal on. On record.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sometimes I just look at that and I'm like. Like, I'm not joking. Like, I'm calm thinking about.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, I've liked that so many times, too.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, I. The thing that always stands out is the double fried shrimp.

[Mark Norman]

I know that.

[Stavros Halkias]

He had a thing of fried shrimp, and he said it. I'm on vacation. Give me a whole other one.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, he was in Rome.

[Stavros Halkias]

He was in Rome with his new wife.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's got the best room of all time. Dies in, like, a hot tub, probably.

[Eldis]

Like, I think.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think it was like. You do you have the thing pulled up?

[Mark Norman]

I think there's a couple pina coladas in there.

[Eldis]

Two orders of fried king prawns, a large portion of foie gras.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that's what did it.

[Eldis]

That's four shots of rum, two pina coladas, and two beers, which is like that. You know, I'm going to do that every day at the beach this summer. You know, that's Nothing.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's awesome.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah. It's the combination. It's a speedball of foie gras and four shots of roast.

[Stavros Halkias]

Incredible. That's an incredible order.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, it really is. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wanted to experience that. So, like, is it fucked up to take solace in. In the way one of your heroes died when you know you have the exact same problem? Like, I hear that. And as morbid as it is, I'm like, that sounds awesome. Maybe because I'm depressed. Because I'm like, I would love to have a great day in Italy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Have a great meal and die peacefully in my sleep.

[Mark Norman]

That sounds nice.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I do think it's because I'm depressed. Honestly, I do think I'm sort of. It's like even being fat is kind of coward suicide, where you're like, oh, it's slow. It's slow, Right?

[Mark Norman]

So you're gas leak.

[Stavros Halkias]

Eventually this will happen, but I don't have the guts to do it.

[Mark Norman]

And you're having a good time on the way there. Bourdain should have gone that way, too. Let's be honest.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think.

[Mark Norman]

What, he hung himself or something?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Who knows? You know, we really can't get into the end of Bourdain's life, you know? But I do hear there's a great film coming out dealing with another. The earlier part of his life that everyone should really enjoy.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, hey. All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Something called Tony and. And I may or may not play a fat line cook.

[Mark Norman]

All right. Okay. Wow. Yeah. It's a documentary. Yeah,

[Stavros Halkias]

yeah, it's a movie from the future. It's the first ever time travel movie. I'm fucking 50. It's just a Greek restaurant cooking up, fudgeing calamari.

[Mark Norman]

Right, right.

[Stavros Halkias]

But, yeah, dude, it is. Sometimes I'm like, is this morbid how much, like, I'm not getting comfort? I get out of thinking about dying. Like, James Gandolfini.

[Mark Norman]

That is pretty badass.

[Stavros Halkias]

He went out happy, and we don't know that. It's obviously tragic, and I feel bad.

[Mark Norman]

Family.

[Stavros Halkias]

But in that moment, like, sometimes, I guess again, who knows? Maybe it's purely depression and craving death on some level.

[Mark Norman]

It's also tough for the wife. She's like my husband. And also the bill. Yeah, he's got to get that bill in Rome. I'm sure that was a couple grand.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're sorry. Can we. Before the ambulance I get here, can we just settle up?

[Mark Norman]

Exactly. She's like, I'm with my husband here. You got to leave it with the gurney. That's how you get out of that one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

[Mark Norman]

What?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Do you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Have you thought about your death at all? Are you a man who thinks about mortality?

[Mark Norman]

I should.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because you're anxious, but it doesn't feel like you're worried about the ultimate.

[Mark Norman]

Worried about death. I'm worried about people and, you know, whatever. But, like, I drive drunk. I don't wear a helmet when I ride a bike. I do, I do a lot of drugs. I, I, Yeah, I should worry about that. I. I live on the edge.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Mark Norman]

Like, List is worried. He's like, look at this lump on my leg. I'm going down. I have none of that. I could have, like a big old egg shaped car bunk in my ass and I'm like, let it ride. You know, just go around it. But, yeah, I don't worry about death too much, but I should, because I. I got doored once on a. On a bike.

[Caller]

Whoa.

[Mark Norman]

Went over the door. Holy. I was on my moped and I hit a pothole.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is kind of recent.

[Mark Norman]

Well, the door was about six months ago. The moped was about two years ago.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God.

[Mark Norman]

Pothole fell off. No helmet. Knocked out. On 8th Avenue, knocked out. Are you in the street? And construction workers carried me onto the sidewalk. And I woke up and I was, like, so in pain. My head was ringing. And they were like, you good? I was like, I'm good. They walked away and they pulled my bike off and I just rode home.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God. You rode home in the bike.

[Mark Norman]

And I was so in pain, but you just faked it. You know, you ever, like, walk into a glass wall and you're like, hey, everybody. And your, your nose is hurting like hell, but you just gotta go, oh, they're all laughing at you, and you pretend to laugh and you want to kill yourself stuff. Yeah. Interesting. I should, I should take it. And I got a kid now, so I should.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I was gonna. Does the kid have ADD any, like, worrying about just. You have to be around for it.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, it does give you that, which is kind of nice because I had no reason to live before, you know, I just want to come up with a new bid, have a good. Have a cocktail. But now I'm like, oh, I should eat right. And whatever.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Exercise, hang out.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. And you gotta set an example for him.

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course. That's. That's hilarious to think about.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. I got pulled over drunk driving once. This is like. Yeah, a month ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How up is this? The Cop was like, wait, are you that comedian? And I'm like, oh, yeah. And he goes, make me laugh and I'll let you go. True story. I'm not gonna say the state because it might. The guy. Yeah, but I told a black joke.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah. What's gonna happen? Yeah, definitely. The police will be held accountable for their actions. You're right, Mark.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You can have a video of a guy sh. A woman in the head, and they'll be like, we don't know. But God forbid you say Alabama on a podcast. Anyway, go ahead.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, it was Rhode island and small state, but, yeah, he was a cool guy, and he was a comedy fan. And I told a black joke. He didn't laugh. And I was like, oh. And I told a gay joke. He didn't laugh. I told a trans joke, and he died. And he's like, get the hell out of here. And I was like, it's so funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

We can track what's hack in real time. Like, oh, I guess. I guess. Yep. That's what a cop will like. Wow, they've really evolved. The black joke didn't work. He's like. He's like, oh, can you. He turns his body cam on.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Give me the black joke again. Who turns it back on. I find that very tasteless. Mr. Norman just winking at you the whole time. That's so funny.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Good times.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's going on that, like, cops think about trans people or, like, just blue collar. It has become the go to. If you're fucking stupid. It's like Polish jokes or, like, racist or whatever. Now it is trans in a way where it's like, why do this many. It's like, you don't live in. Listen, you live on the Lower east side. You live in Bushwick.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You might come across. But it's like, I bet most of those people see a trans person in their life.

[Mark Norman]

I think that's what it is. I think they're not exposed to it. So they're like, ooh, that's kind of exotic. Like a joke about it. And they hear about it so much.

[Stavros Halkias]

Autistic. It's like autistic and trans. The clock's ticking.

[Mark Norman]

Oh.

[Stavros Halkias]

On those jokes. You know what I mean? Because it's like. Because it is the. Because they're both novelties. I think you're right.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Special.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's more new and it's more nuanced than Right.

[Mark Norman]

Right. You get the pronoun, Joe. There's a lot of layers to trans, you know, and you get a Dick joke.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

There's a lot there.

[Stavros Halkias]

It is so fast. Like, I don't know how the it happened that culturally, that's like. Like a main signifier.

[Mark Norman]

What's the newest thing, too? It's like, the newest thing to joke about. You know, like, Polish is so 50s. Yes. You know, then it was, like, blonde.

[Stavros Halkias]

I guess that's true. I guess it. It starts in pure ethnic, starts in pure color. Starts pure black, white.

[Mark Norman]

Yes. Easy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or, you know, whatever. Different color. And then it moves on. That's it. That is fascinating. I wonder what the next.

[Mark Norman]

What's the next thing. I remember when, like, dick pics were a thing, you know, with the iPhone. Everybody now. Everybody has a dick pic joke or dating apps, and everybody's dating app joke.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

So, yeah. What is the next thing?

[Stavros Halkias]

Demographic?

[Mark Norman]

I don't know. Pedos. But, yeah, pedos is pretty fair. Timeless.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Eldis]

Albanians.

[Stavros Halkias]

You wish.

[Mark Norman]

No one cares enough. You got Belushis.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

They're Albanian.

[Stavros Halkias]

They do have. There is a little Internet cachet to Albanians right now. That's true. And now this, unfortunately, is. Is. Is positioned as one of the top online Albanians. Another one of the. Another thing. Yeah. Another one of the many things he doesn't deserve that he gets.

[Mark Norman]

And that hairline, that is wild. That's a perfect hairline.

[Stavros Halkias]

Do you covet the hairline? You're looking okay.

[Mark Norman]

I'm okay. I. I do the pro peach. I. I grow it out long.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

But when it's wet, I look like a sweaty rabbi. It's bad.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

I. I worry about a pool. I don't get my hair.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay. You'll get in the pool with the. Yeah, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You let. You can just let it ride.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's a certain level of freedom.

[Mark Norman]

That's a beautiful night.

[Stavros Halkias]

Caring.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Or.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. You're kind of in no man's land.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because you're not. You're not gonna go. It doesn't seem like you're gonna go to Turkey, right?

[Mark Norman]

No. No chance. But you're out of. You're out of Nam. I'm still in the. I'm, like, in the bush.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no. I went native. I'm like, it's all, brother. Let it go.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. You started an opioid farm with a. With a Viet.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, I've started. I've started a compound.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

On the Laotian border in an ngo. Yeah. You know, I'm enjoying going full native hair. Hair wise.

[Mark Norman]

Well, chicks, I think they dig it because they're like, this guy is cool and confident and doesn't give a. Yeah, it's back to.

[Stavros Halkias]

It is. Back to. It is. It's definitely novel.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're. No one. No one lets their hair everywhere. I mean, look, the. The advancements in plugs.

[Mark Norman]

Unreal.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are out of control.

[Mark Norman]

We have close friends who.

[Stavros Halkias]

Out of control. Out of control.

[Mark Norman]

The Mateos, the soda. I mean.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, they're Everyone on. Dude. You find out, like, everyone on TV has hair.

[Mark Norman]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Everyone on TV basically has hair plugs.

[Mark Norman]

And what's crazy. We have footage of, like, Kimmel, Seth McFarlane, Elon Musk, Joel McHale. The list goes on. We have them in the, you know, 1998 seats when they're crazy. Crazy back.

[Stavros Halkias]

Totally, totally. I don't know. We'll see. You would never. You're good. You're. You're fine. You're not gonna consider. You're not gonna go plugs?

[Mark Norman]

I don't know. I don't know. Maybe later in life I would only. I'm only debating because it's. It ain't cheap.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

So I'm waiting for it to come down.

[Stavros Halkias]

Okay.

[Mark Norman]

Like a flat screen.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're such a piece of.

[Mark Norman]

You remember these old, old big screen TVs used to be $10,000 for, like. Like, you know, 500.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you're right. You're right. That is so funny that you're still. You're still worried about that amount of money, because I know it's not cheap, but, like, you're fine.

[Mark Norman]

I. I could be fine, but, you know, mentality.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's true. That is true. You do. I guess that's important. It is important to stay. You'd rather stay cheap than be somebody who doesn't understand money at all. Which is kind of where I am. Where I'm like. Because my whole life, I never cared about money.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But on either. In either way, like, I should have been cheap. I should have known what stuff cost.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I never did. And then I just kind of kept going until I didn't have to. Yeah. I'm basically prime to get Bernie Madoffed, and I don't try it. Nobody try it.

[Mark Norman]

All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

I got a couple layers of protection.

[Mark Norman]

There you go.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I really don't. Like, I just.

[Mark Norman]

The same way I got a bunny guy and that. He saved me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

But like, my wife, she was like, let me see your finances. And I was like, oh, okay. What is she gonna do, steal it all? But I eventually showed her after hours of fighting, and she was like.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's like, only fans Only fans. Only fans. Only fans. Venmo directly to a 22 year old barista. No, that's the thing. You're too cheap to ever get fin. Bombed.

[Mark Norman]

You'll never. No, no, no way.

[Stavros Halkias]

You will never get exploit. Expl. Extorted. You would. You would go Letterman so fast.

[Mark Norman]

Dude, I would.

[Stavros Halkias]

You would have a public announcement. You'd be like, these are trying to get me for my money. I will never allow that to happen.

[Mark Norman]

That happened to Louie Anderson. Remember that? No. Oh, man. He was hosting Family Feud. Great gig.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he was my dream gig, by the way.

[Mark Norman]

Great gig.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would love to be. To one day host Family Feud, my

[Mark Norman]

number one game show.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm putting. I'm putting that out there. Someone. Look, Steve Harvey's gonna do this job for another 20 years, easy. He's built for. He'll be doing that until he retires.

[Mark Norman]

He has one move, by the way. Somebody says something stupid, he goes, yeah, absolutely.

[Stavros Halkias]

I do not. The incredible incredulity is his number one move.

[Mark Norman]

That's his sister's name. But yeah, no, you're right. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would love. That is my. That is. I would love to be 60 and host a Family Feud.

[Mark Norman]

And you do like, like, what do they call it? Bump bulk shooting? Where you shoot like six in a day.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You're done for a month.

[Stavros Halkias]

My dream.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

So I'm putting that out in the universe. That's my showbiz sort of like retirement gig.

[Mark Norman]

That is great. That's a sweet gig. Remember the old one? You could kiss every woman on it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, dude. The one guy just fingering every. Every grandma. You look beautiful. And then the guys just have to sit there, right? And they're smiling as this guy. Like that is. By the way. That is how like everything in society is degraded. You used a level of fame like being a game show host.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Allowed you. You could. You had prima nocta over everyone in America.

[Mark Norman]

Bob Barker, level of famous. Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's fucking crazy, dude.

[Mark Norman]

Crazy. Anyway, anyway, who are we talking about?

[Eldis]

Louie Anderson.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, because I'm a big. I love the show.

[Mark Norman]

I have the show.

[Stavros Halkias]

Lou, remember that show? He did that. The kids show?

[Mark Norman]

The cartoon cartoon.

[Stavros Halkias]

I loved it.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Anyway, give us. Give us your recollection then eldest will fact check.

[Mark Norman]

I don't know everything, but I know he was a closeted gay guy back there was a 90s.

[Stavros Halkias]

Really hard to tell.

[Mark Norman]

Really hard to tell. And eventually played a woman on tv. But. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And was incredible at it.

[Mark Norman]

Great. He's so funny.

[Stavros Halkias]

That is one of the best he plays a. A. He plays Zach Galifianakis mother in baskets.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he plays a middle aged, an elderly woman. And it fully works.

[Mark Norman]

It totally works.

[Stavros Halkias]

It doesn't even come off as like a gimmick.

[Mark Norman]

No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

In. In like 8 seconds. At first you're like, huh, that's hilarious. Louie Anderson. And then you're like, that's his mom.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then 10 seconds and you're like, whoa, that's his mom.

[Mark Norman]

It's basically Robert Downey Jr. Black. He is. As a woman. Yeah, he just pulled it off perfectly. But yeah. So he was hooking up with this guy. He would like, hook up with a guy in Vegas where they shot. Shot every, you know, couple weeks.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, they shot in Vegas back then?

[Mark Norman]

I think so. And they would just hook up in a van. He would blow the guy, and then he was. He'd be like, don't tell anybody. Then one day the guy's like, I'm gonna tell the press unless you give me 20 grand or so. And then the guy. And Louie's like, all right, all right, all right. And then, you know, a month later, he's like, you know what? I need like 100 grand now. And he's like, all right, all right. And then millions of dollars go by and eventually the guy still told. Oh, something like that.

[Eldis]

That was. That was mostly right. What I'm seeing here is, is Anderson made several payments to Gordon totaling around 100k before eventually going to the FBI, where.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, Louie went to the.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, Louie went to the FBI. Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But he was still at 100k.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, I was way off.

[Stavros Halkias]

It cost him 100k to just to.

[Mark Norman]

Because it was just accumulating, I think, because they kept hooking up.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, the guy was a piece of.

[Eldis]

I was arrested in a sting operation and sentenced to 21 months in prison.

[Stavros Halkias]

Good for Louis Restitution.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Wait, wait. Why did the guy get arrested?

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it's illegal to bribe someone.

[Mark Norman]

But isn't it illegal to pay for sex? Well, I guess he was paying for.

[Eldis]

No, no, he wasn't paying. The guy threatened to tell tablets that Anderson had solicited him for sex years earlier.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go.

[Eldis]

And Louie was afraid that would, like, damage his rep. Poor guy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That sucks.

[Mark Norman]

That sucks, Tim.

[Stavros Halkias]

Now look at Tim's like, now you can be part. Now you can openly be a gay villain who's. Who dresses up as members of the media.

[Mark Norman]

Tim.

[Stavros Halkias]

Tim dressed and mocked the woman who runs CBS News. You can now be. That's how gay you can be and not be as scared of the media. Whereas Louis Anderson is, like, just probably having gentle gay sex in a van and then doing a great job hosting. And now you could just. At least we've made some advancements.

[Mark Norman]

True. It's like Ellen couldn't be gay. She got canc. And then she was like, okay to be gay. And then she got canceled.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just a piece of.

[Eldis]

Yeah, here's a little fucked up tidbit about Louis.

[Mark Norman]

He also.

[Eldis]

His sister alleged that he suffered elder abuse on his deathbed when his fucking agent and manager conspired to change his trust, like, in his dying moments and make themselves the primary beneficiaries.

[Stavros Halkias]

What?

[Mark Norman]

Wow. Yeah, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Louie Anderson is the man. He's the man that pisses me the off.

[Mark Norman]

I open for him a few times. Really? Yeah. Cool guy. He was the first fat comic to do the. Let me get the mic stand out of the way so you can see me. Which has been done today.

[Stavros Halkias]

He did it first in the 80s and that. Yes. Respect to him for that. That's a good one.

[Mark Norman]

Love you, Louie, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, he would have been a. He truly would have been a dream guest. Because I feel like, right as I. I try, I. I think I like. Like there was like something up in the air where I could have opened for him very early. And I was. That was the most pumped I was. But I was way too. It was like. Would have been a real stretch.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

At the time. Because I feel like by the time I was even, you know, 10. 10 years ago, like, when did Louis Anderson die?

[Mark Norman]

I don't know.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, really?

[Mark Norman]

That reason. Wow. Yeah. The coolest part about opening for him, when you're, like, in awe. He's killing.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's.

[Mark Norman]

You know, he's got jokes from decades and decades, kids. But then we'd go to McDonald's after and then he would order like crazy. And you're like, dude, it was like. Like opening for.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, my God.

[Mark Norman]

It was like.

[Stavros Halkias]

That was wasted on you.

[Mark Norman]

I know, I know. I was like, I'll have some nuggets. And he's like, get out of the way, son. But it'd be like, open for prior. Then he's just like, let's do blow all night, you know?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Even if you're not a blow guy, you'll figure it out.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You'll figure it out. Damn, dude. Yeah, he was the man for sure. I did love Lou Louie. The cartoon was a banger. A lot of fat representation. Yeah, he was kind of a cool little fat Kid. And I was like, yeah, hell, yeah, that's me.

[Mark Norman]

You had Fat Albert. And then Louie. There wasn't much for fat kids.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's true. Let me think about. And. And then you had heavyweights.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that was great. Great, great movie.

[Stavros Halkias]

Great movie.

[Mark Norman]

A couple spray. Like Mighty Ducks had the fat gold. Like, he had a couple guys.

[Stavros Halkias]

By the way, that guy is not doing. Doing good.

[Mark Norman]

Rosenberg.

[Stavros Halkias]

He is. And he was in heavyweights as well.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, he was really talented.

[Stavros Halkias]

He was great. He was.

[Mark Norman]

He.

[Stavros Halkias]

Honestly, I probably modeled a lot of my, like, personality as a little fat kid. Because he was like, the cool fat guy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, he was.

[Stavros Halkias]

He always had wisecracks. He would do like the L. Yeah. Raise his eyebrows. Like, really? And now the guy's. That guy's looking tough.

[Mark Norman]

I think meth got him. I mean, dude, being a child star, it fucks everybody.

[Stavros Halkias]

There is no way, like, that should be illegal. If you try. If you take your child to every audition, should be a sting operation. Oh, every. Every Single time a parent that's takes a child for anything.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

They should go to jail.

[Mark Norman]

I love it.

[Stavros Halkias]

They should go to jail.

[Mark Norman]

What's weird, you're like, you. It's like a cattle call where you bring your kid, like, hoping that he gets discovered and you get rich. Right. It's so weird. You're using the kids kid.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

And same with pageant cunts. These pageants.

[Stavros Halkias]

Pageants even worse.

[Mark Norman]

That's crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Pageants even worse, dude.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. I mean, I watch every one of them.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, you've got a feed. Yeah, you got a feed of security cam footage.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

From every Hilton garden in ballroom.

[Mark Norman]

Like, she's got potential. Yeah, I like her. I've got, like a fantasy football league going with spreadsheets. I like the Virginia chick.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think. I think what you're describing is just. Is how you got to Epstein's Island. I mean, that's the other. Other thing is, like, everyone acting for sure. But pageants are straight up theater systems for pedophiles easily. There's no way that the fact that that exists. I mean, that is despicable, dude.

[Mark Norman]

Pedophiles must love it because they can go in the audience just like, it's like a show. It's like a, you know, you get a free strip tease.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's like going to a fashion show.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, what's coming up this season?

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who are the children to groom this season?

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

So, I mean, the pedophilic shit that goes on, like, they don't have that in other countries, do they? Eldest. Do they have, like. Are there European beauty pageants? This. This is where. I'd love to blame America for something, but it probably is, unfortunately. They probably exist other places.

[Mark Norman]

I'd say so. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But we have a very, like. There's something about that. Like Southern churchy.

[Mark Norman]

Right, Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean? There's just some. So fucked about it.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But, you know, whatever.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Now it's just a bunch of Florida teachers just keep students. Every. Every time I open Twitter, it's just like a new teacher and they're all kind of, like, kind of hot.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

It's so strange.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Something's in the. Something's in the air down there in Florida.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You'll know. Yeah. Anyway, you're not. You're preparing your son for his first pageant soon, I'm guessing.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Hell yeah. Well, what's the boy version of that? I got a little boy. I guess it's like. Like altar boy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Is the boy version. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, yeah. So what? Because the other thing is that your. Your kid was born like a couple days with my nephew. So I always think about. When I track my nephew's development, I think about your son because I'm like, oh, what's this little up to? Oh, yeah. Because they're. They're basically the same age.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Seventeenth. Yes. Yeah. MLK weekend and Trump's inauguration.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. So everybody's like the sad day ever. And I was like, this is a great day. Like fist pumping in the street. Best.

[Stavros Halkias]

We always knew it about Mark. He finally comes forward and shows who he's been the whole time.

[Mark Norman]

Goo Maga.

[Stavros Halkias]

You named your son 47.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

47 Norman. Yeah. Is it not? Because, you know my wife's baron.

[Mark Norman]

Okay, okay, all right, all right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Donald Trump Jr. Norman.

[Mark Norman]

Speaking of coke, that guy loves the yam yam. Every time I see that guy on tv, he's like, he's.

[Stavros Halkias]

I know, dude. It's so annoying that just un objectively, some of the worst people of all time won the decade. Like DJT Jr just gets to be on cocaine on TV. He will need to listen to what that fucking idiot has to say. He's the most classic example of a fail son I can possibly imagine. He's accomplished almost nothing without. And then plus the, like, how he's got to fuck you up psychologically for that to be your dad. Like that story about.

[Mark Norman]

Totally.

[Stavros Halkias]

That story about, I don't know, look up if there's apocryphal or not where he's going to Take him to a Yankee game and he's like in a, in a jersey. And Trump slaps his son in front of his friends for not wearing a suit. No, it's like, is that real elders or is that. Did I get got by some MSNBC AI, that's crazy.

[Mark Norman]

But then you got Hunter Biden as well. You got the two sides of the coin there with coke. Coke folk.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who do you really want to do coke with? Oh, you gotta go Hunter in a. You know. You know by a mile.

[Mark Norman]

I remember those videos of him with hookers and doing crack and a towel. And I'm like, why would he film this? And I realized, realized, oh, he's on crack. He's on crack. Why would you film this?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, he's the. He really? I mean, now you're like, not like now. Every, like, every. There's like a story where it's like, oh, yeah, Baron Trump just made $40 million on crypto. Shh. It's like, give me the old fashioned corruption where it's like the sun is getting his dick sucked by sex workers. He's on crack. That's a fun presidential scandal.

[Mark Norman]

I know. And he just, he did an interview with Callahan.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, it was, was. He comes off so incredible and like a very smart guy. And it's like, yeah. And then I'm like, of course. Like, why would I judge this guy? This is what I'm like, I would do a. I would do drugs with a couple prostitutes for a week.

[Mark Norman]

That's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

Awesome.

[Mark Norman]

Sure. Probably some of, some of our money. Yeah. But you're like, this guy can talk. And then you realize, well, yeah, he's a cokehead. Yeah, they can talk about anything. They can talk about Donkey Kong.

[Stavros Halkias]

He comes away and he comes interested.

[Mark Norman]

I watched the whole thing.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was shocked at how. Because I put him in the same kind of bracket as like, oh, just some political fail son.

[Mark Norman]

Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

And he's. And, and then when you think about like that family got so fucked up by the like, good son getting fucking

[Mark Norman]

brain cancer out of nowhere.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then you think about like, damn, these people fucking grow up under such a fucked up microscope. Totally, totally kid of a politician.

[Mark Norman]

I mean, it's like child star times 10.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. Like, yeah. I mean, it can go that fucking. I mean, anyone whose parent is a politician, if you want to be president, you. Another person should be in jail. Everyone that wants to be president is a sociopath thinking you deserve that much power. I can't even imagine being raised by that. Even if he's like a good. The funny thing is, the only time Biden seemed like a reasonable human being and not completely senile is when you would see their leaked exchanges between him and Hunter.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, son, I love you so much.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're gonna get through this. And you're like, damn, he's capable of being cogent. Yeah. At least a good father.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

He should have been running the country.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

But he could at least give his crackheads. Yeah. Former crack addicted son some solace.

[Mark Norman]

Right. Well, that's why Baron is so. Because he doesn't seem to have a vice, so he almost seems scarier. He's got like a Darth Vader thing where he's just like. He's like, eyes on the prize.

[Stavros Halkias]

He knows nine feet tall.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. He's dark, he's gloomy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. There's. There's a. Yeah, there, there. You know, like the weird. Like the type of fucking guy who's throating Trump right now and pretending it's cool to be a pedophile. You know, they've got some, like, designs for Baron being president.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah. You know, something's in the works.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, like. Like when. Like there was that AI. Early AI of like, Trump with a beard and a shaved head. You ever see that? All these guys that just make Trump seem, like, hot. They weirdly want to fuck him. He's like their daddy that they respect psychosexually.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, they want Trump. You know, they want Baron to be like our seven foot tall president.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who, like, gets every. Every ethnic minority out of the country. Like, they have visions of Baron Trump and like, like white armor on, like a horse galloping and like that.

[Mark Norman]

Isn't it weird that he goes to NYU that is walking that camp? Like, he's walking through Washington Square park right now. It's crazy.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, dude, I wonder.

[Mark Norman]

Getting laid.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's got to be.

[Mark Norman]

He's got to be.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's 6 11.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's rich. He's getting. There's no way. You're not.

[Mark Norman]

But he doesn't seem like he wants it, you know, that's what I want in a young presidential son is the hunter. B. I want hunter. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, dude, if you. If. If Baron gets busted doing ketamine with

[Mark Norman]

strippers, I like him.

[Stavros Halkias]

Then I'm like, all right, I'm listening. You got. You've caught my attention.

[Mark Norman]

Yes. It's like when Mulaney did blow. You're like, all right, I know. I like you. Oh, I like it way more now.

[Stavros Halkias]

We. Yeah, I Became friends with Milane. Fully post. Fully post him on cocaine.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it was a moment where you're like, yes, yeah, he's one of us. Yeah, you're clearly is one. It made. It made Milane snap picture into like. Cuz you're like before you're like, is he just like a comedy robot? And then you're like, no, he's a. He's been. He's yipped out of his mind. And he loves comedy so much. He does. He writes like jokes on cocaine.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that's what it's all about.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's crazy, dude.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah. Cuz before he was so polished. He was always a great comic, but he was. He just seemed like. Like a. A relative that went to Yale.

[Stavros Halkias]

That you're like, oh, it definitely humanized him as a. Just not. Because the one thing I do love about stand up is that it does. There are people that if you took us doing comedy out of the equation, we would have almost nothing in common. Right. Like, I do like that. As like, kind of embarrassing as it sounds, it is an identity in a way where I'm like, I do get along with people that. That outside of this, I wouldn't have any. And get along with him and form real connections in a way where it's like, what would I really have in common with somebody who like, you know, like, he went to fucking Georgetown.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, exactly. You know what I mean?

[Stavros Halkias]

Exactly. But because he was so good at comedy, it almost took me a while to realize like, oh, he's like a fucking. Like a rich kid from the Chicago burbs who went to Georgetown. Whatever. And then when you throw the drum. Drug use in there.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, yes. One of us.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, one of us. One of the Wall Street. One of us. One with the rose is in the background. I loved when the Rose was using that as like his main credit. Yeah, he's like, he's. Doris has one of the most hilarious careers of all time in Wolf of Wall street for one second.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, I didn't know he there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Oh, he's literally is.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, he's one. He's in. He's a trader. Later.

[Caller]

What?

[Stavros Halkias]

In whatever. Strathmore. Whatever. The.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, well, that fits. I mean, he's. He lives like those guys.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. No, it made sense. I mean. Yeah, the. The. In the Breaking Bad universe.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, that's right. That's right. Now do you feel on the movie sets, do you feel a little like, oh, these guys are like thespians and I'm a, you know, nightclub comic.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, Dep. I mean, dude, on Begonia, it's. Yeah, it's Jesse Plemons and Emma Stone.

[Mark Norman]

That's the.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's like the best actors alive, maybe I think the best actors of their generation. I'm obviously a little biased, but even before I work with them, I re like, I felt that Stone in Plemons. It's like, I really do think as pure actors, nobody is better than them. So that was like, insane.

[Mark Norman]

I mean, I would have been like Leo in the trailer of Once Upon a Time where you're like, come on, man. You're gonna get your together. You're gonna stop eating Ben and Jerry's every night. You gotta get your back together, dude.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not even kidding. There was a day where I got so lucky that my big One of my big scenes the night before, for some reason I just went to f. I went. I took the train into London. Friend of the show, Caleb Heron. You know Caleb, very funny. Very funny. We got up on Indian food, and then even without him, I'm eating little treats. I'm, you know, I'm in a. I'm in a foreign land. I got to try all their treats.

[Mark Norman]

That's their thing there too, is the Indian food.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Oh, dude. So good, good. And I get. I just overeat and I have a horrific headache. And they're like, hey, we had to change the. We had to change the schedule. Sorry. You're not shooting for like, you know, a couple days.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, great.

[Stavros Halkias]

I was like, I almost up. Wow. Like, my big. Like it was nerves. It was nerves. Like, it was truly nervous eating, in a way. But still I was like, you're a idiot.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You almost had so much like biryani that you had a sodium headache and would have been bad on set.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, that.

[Stavros Halkias]

That whole thing was so surreal that I just. That the whole thing felt like a dream.

[Mark Norman]

Sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like it never felt real.

[Mark Norman]

I mean, this is Oscar. I think Best Picture nom here we

[Stavros Halkias]

got nominated and you know, Stone has won two fucking Oscars. Plemons has been nominated. He should have. I think he should have won this year. He's the man.

[Mark Norman]

He's great.

[Stavros Halkias]

But on that. On that set, for sure, it was fucking crazy. And then, you know, then you go to tires and it's like. Like someone who Shane met at a gas station has the. Has like a major B plot of the season. You're like, I'm okay here. I'm feeling pretty good on the tire set.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But, you know, it just. It just kind of. The other thing, you Kind of realize is that like, you know, it was a crazy moment to just be like, these are just dudes.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just fucking. And I guess I got lucky because they're both, both just actually cool people. But also you see people who've been on TV and you see them as. Or films and you see them as like larger than life. And then you're like, these are also 36 year olds. We have all the same. Like, we grew up at the same time. Like, it's like it kind of demystifies them. And I do think in a weird way, standup is such bullshit. And so like tough in ways that it's like you're embarrassed so much. You bomb so much much, even your friends will roast you to smithereens.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That when you're just on a place where people have to be professional, you, it's easy. You're like, no one's gonna come after me.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

My co star's not gonna call me a big fat piece of.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. You're not gonna get heckled by the crew. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I actually, I. I have a great time doing that. So we'll see until. Until that. Until I have to open that Greek restaurant.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, we'll see.

[Stavros Halkias]

We'll see how it goes.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But you know, man. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

You're on a roll.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. It's crazy. I don't understand. I never, I. I was like, oh, hopefully I get to be in some stuff.

[Mark Norman]

But you're cooking and work begets work, so then somebody sees you in something else. Do you think the cult movie was the. Was. Did that help?

[Stavros Halkias]

I think it helped in that. No, like, the whole reason I made it, because I was like, I was like, I think I can act and no one is ever going to cast me in anything. I think very quickly after that, though, I got, I mean, tires in Begonia. I got like, I got tires right after the cult movie. And they just. That was just because I'm friends with Shane.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I think those would have. I think what the cult movie has been helpful for is now I thought it was going to be a launch. I don't think it really did much in terms of getting me more work. But now the fact that I made it, I think proves to people that, like, oh, he's written something. He's written, executive produced and starred in something. So now it's like, now they've seen hope. This is a hope anyway.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That they see me in this other shit and I do. Okay. And they're like, oh, we can trust him a little more than a random guy. He's already made his own movie at a time when nobody makes movies.

[Mark Norman]

That's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

So, you know, whatever. We'll see. I got some ideas, but I also just. Dude, I'm craving not doing. Shit it.

[Mark Norman]

I know.

[Stavros Halkias]

I'm craving not doing.

[Mark Norman]

Again with the poor mentality. I have that, like, relevance mentality. Like, oh, God, Like, Ari just took eight months off, nobody noticed. Now he's back, we're miserable. We hate to see him. He looks like an ayatollah. Now he's the gay one.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

But, yeah, he's back and he's, like, coming out of the gate hot with his TV storytelling show. It's like, that's gonna be huge. Shane's in it. Nate's totally, totally. All these, you know, Ms. Pat, and it's gonna be big. So then, you know, you're like, oh, Ari's back. Okay, there you go. But I. I get worried, like, if I'm gone a week, my wife's like, let's go on a vacation, you psycho. I don't want to. I gotta do this Upper west side, New York comedy club spot or the city's gonna forget about me.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, well, it goes with your class. I think your biggest issue, and it's mine too. It's a lot of people's. But you have the. You have like a class, like, a bit that I'm jealous of because. Because it was like. It's basically just your headphones. The headphones. You were the first. You had a great take that. I think that's a really great joke. Is that everyone. When you hear a great joke, you're like, I felt like that for the last six months, and I've never been able to put that together, but it's like. Yeah, just your. Just. Just saying, like, thought, you know, thoughts are not good. You know, it's like, I feel like every. I think we all live through. I think when AirPods first came out, everyone was just didn't have a thought in their head for five years.

[Mark Norman]

That's so true.

[Stavros Halkias]

I really think that. And I do think what you're describing is staying in the anxiety of it means you never have to reflect, you know, because you're constantly in the rat race, right? So you're just like, it's survival, survival, survival. If you fucking took two weeks off, you'd have to think about yourself. It would have to be your thoughts on an even larger level. Yeah, I think that's your.

[Mark Norman]

Is that what it Is.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think that's your big thing too.

[Mark Norman]

Interesting.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think that's your big thing to conquer.

[Mark Norman]

Okay. It's a little.

[Stavros Halkias]

I think you're.

[Mark Norman]

You know.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I get it because I. I'm the same way where it's scary to sit down and like, honestly, self reflect.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

As opposed to just keep doing it. Because, dude, I've been talking about taking a break for four years, and every time we talk it's like, oh, I gotta finish this first, and then the break's coming.

[Mark Norman]

I've never thought about the reflect. To me, it's more of like. Like, you know, you're gonna be rusty. You're not gonna know how to do stand up anymore. You're gonna lose your. Your house.

[Stavros Halkias]

But that's over. That ended. I think the pandemic ended all those thoughts for me, anyway, because I was the same way over. On a technical standpoint.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then you can do stand up just because it doesn't exist. And I felt like I wasn't that bad when I came back.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. It took like two sets.

[Stavros Halkias]

Two sets and you're fine.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

A week tops. And you are better rested, whatever. But I don't know who's to tell you. That's my hunch. I feel like everyone could. Could. Everyone who's in that mentality could just use a little time off and you'd have to just face the stuff you've been running from.

[Mark Norman]

Interesting.

[Stavros Halkias]

Being real with yourself.

[Mark Norman]

That's funny, because every vacation I went to, we went to Miami for New Year's. That was like a little vacation. And I drank from sun up to sundown for like nine days or seven days and just threw some mushrooms in there and whatever. Oh, dude. Yeah. Was. It was wild. The kid.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mark Norman]

I'm in the pool with the kid, you know, holding him. No floaties.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're using him as a floaty.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, he's saving me. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I. I do think self reflection is scary. And look, I'm just. It's a little projection here. But I think a lot of my friends that I see similar traits in, I think we all need to actually be like, what am I? What is my life like? What have I done? What's good about it? What would I like to change? And again, this is mostly projection because I'm in a state right now where I'm like, I need to think about what I want.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because the worst thing is you do the math and you're like, wait, is my career directly detrimental to my happiness? And unfortunately, I hate to admit every time I've been running the. The equations a lot.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. I've been running the numbers, and the answer really is, do not work as much. And there's just. And I still try to be like, no, I can make it. I can figure.

[Mark Norman]

I can keep it.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I just.

[Eldis]

Just.

[Mark Norman]

Anyway, every man on the street I see, it's like, here's a me with 20, 85 year old guys. They all say, don't work as much. I wish I hadn't worked as much. I wish I saw my family more. I wish I slowed down. I wish. And you're like, oh, God, maybe they're on to something. Every one of them says that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes, you have not. Not one single one. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's not even the one guy who's like, I loved it. It was stuff. But the. The energy of it was. Nobody, nothing. Nobody thinks that.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that. Another great. You know the joke you said about the headphones where you're like, oh, I thought that.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

Goin has that great joke where about depression. And he goes, you know, the thing about life is, is it's every day. That is such a great line. And we've all had that, like, another day. Here we go.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

So good.

[Stavros Halkias]

Patrice. A similar idea where it's like, you can't call out of being in love. Yeah. It's kind of a similar idea to the everyday. It's funny that, like, to Patrice, love with a woman is depressing. Like. Like, actually loving a woman is like, can I get a break from loving my wife? You know, it wasn't even his wife. But yeah, dude, the. That whole. The Goldman depression stuff is unbelievable.

[Mark Norman]

Right? Yeah, he's a. He's a beast.

[Stavros Halkias]

All right, well, listen, we've.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, geez.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's time for us to take some. You know, we can talk about ourselves, but really, we need to take. We need to help the people we're. In some ways, ways, me and you are beyond fixing.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, let's.

[Stavros Halkias]

Let's focus on this next generation.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. We're like, we might help that car that gets in a wreck and the door never closes. Right? That's us. You can do everything, but we're still gonna be dented.

[Stavros Halkias]

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[Caller]

What up Stavi Eldis Esteemed guests or guests long time, first time. You know the deal.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thanks man.

[Caller]

So basically I'm a student teacher right now. I'm currently teaching at a middle school and there's a student of mine who really wants me to get with our sister and what? I'm not gonna lie, she's pretty hot. The sister. Not the student for reference.

[Stavros Halkias]

Student wants you to her sister and you're thinking about it, you idiot. Finish up. But this is crazy.

[Mark Norman]

Whoa.

[Caller]

The sister's like 25. I'm gonna be 28 in a few months. The sister's already like a. A nurse. Have their license and shit. Have a house, apparently.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why is this?

[Caller]

And I'm gonna be graduating with both my masters and bachelor's. And I was just curious to know how could I let my student know that I'm down to date her sister? But how can I do it in a way that doesn't come off as like, creepy or desperate?

[Stavros Halkias]

What?

[Mark Norman]

Wait a minute.

[Stavros Halkias]

This guy's out of his.

[Mark Norman]

I don't think this is so bad. Wait a minute. Wait, hold on. Sister is 25.

[Stavros Halkias]

Does the sister even know he exists?

[Mark Norman]

That's a good question.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's saying a child who he's teaching.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Wants to set him up with her sister.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he's like, nice.

[Mark Norman]

Well, she's 25.

[Stavros Halkias]

It's a seven.

[Mark Norman]

Seven year old.

[Eldis]

28, huh? And he's 28.

[Mark Norman]

25.

[Stavros Halkias]

Look, look, look. I'm not saying that if this guy met this sister and they hit it off and he asked her respectfully to go out, that it's very. That. That's weird. It's not weird for this guy to happen to be dating one of his students. Older sib. One of his students. Family members.

[Caller]

Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. That's not weird. Teachers are in the community. Fine. What's weird is having a child you teach set you up. That's. To me, the. He doesn't even know this is a 12 year old.

[Mark Norman]

Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Did she. How does. She said to her sister, I wanna. Because this other thing is like. It's a weird thing where maybe this kid is trying to process her crush on an adult. Setting her up or just like by setting it. We've been in middle school and we've all had a teacher we've loved, right?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Yeah, sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sometimes that's just an innocent. Whatever. But sometimes. And look, it's innocent for kids to have crushes. Whatever.

[Mark Norman]

I had that and I was homeschooled.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, It's. It. Whatever. But I just think having a child who you teach during your trial period of teaching.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Set you up. And it's not even like during a parent teacher conference or during a conference. He sees the. The sister, they have a cute little moment.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

She's like, you're doing such a great Job with my sister.

[Caller]

It.

[Stavros Halkias]

You're doing such a great job with my sister.

[Mark Norman]

There you go.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you know, I hope to see you at the spring fair or whatever.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, right.

[Stavros Halkias]

We don't. This woman might not even know this guy exists. A child. A child wants two adults to. And he's think that's to me, this is the odd part.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Not.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not that he might date students. You know, a student, sibling, whatever. Let's. I'm not saying that that's weird. I'm just saying because. Yes. Now let's figure this out. Let's say we try. We're trying to get him laid from this 25 year old, you know, sibling.

[Mark Norman]

Huh?

[Stavros Halkias]

How does he go about it?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, I think you gotta wait because he's a student teacher. So he'll never see this kid again probably once the year is over. I think you should wait till the year's over, the semester's over. Then I think it's a little more appropriate.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure, but then what? You fucking take this kid's fucking. You steal this kid's address from the school.

[Eldis]

You like, have a great summer. What's your sister's Instagram?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, there you go. I'm not. This could be a small town, you know, people.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's what I'm.

[Eldis]

That's what I'm thinking, like, just thinking of if it's like a small town kind of thing. I can kind of see this vibe a little more.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. You cannot be a teacher who gets their 12 year old student to set you up with someone.

[Mark Norman]

I think if he was gunning for like, damn, this student's got a hot sister. Let me work this out. But the student is coming to him going, my sister's single. You guys would be perfect together. I don't know, I think this is kind of.

[Stavros Halkias]

But then what does he do? Say, okay, give me your sister's number. Does he say that to his student?

[Mark Norman]

I think the girl, the student has to go back to her sister and go, hey, he's interested. Where do you want to go with this?

[Stavros Halkias]

Isn't it a little odd that a child is your go between here?

[Mark Norman]

That's a little odd.

[Stavros Halkias]

All I'm saying, here's what I'.

[Mark Norman]

He's not fucking the student.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, no, no.

[Mark Norman]

So we're okay. No, no, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

Look, look, he is not a criminal.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is a wholesome call and I'm not accusing him of anything. I'm just saying the only way this happens is if there's a legitimate. Is there some school event? Is there a Graduation. Is there something where. Cuz we don't even know who this fucking. Again, we don't know if this girl even knows that he exists this or if this is just a fantasy that his 11 year old student has. Right. So the only way, the only way this happens is if like. Or if you're truly blessed. And this is a small town. You're out at Chili's one day with the fellas, she's at Chili's with her family and you could be like, oh, this is Mr. That. If you have a weird. One of those weird seeing this teacher in the supermarket moments.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yep. And you happen to be with your sister. Okay. But to me, even though you're not. I'm not accusing you of anything untoward here. I'm just saying it's too weird to push the envelope in any way. This is something you have to see if it happens. And if it happens, great. And no one's saying you're weird. But to just be like, hey, can I get your address? Can I get your sister's number? Like imagine if a fucking principal just overhears, hey, what's going on? Can I get your sister's number? Or what?

[Mark Norman]

Oh yeah, that's good point when you put it like that.

[Stavros Halkias]

If. So if a different parent.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And by the way, he's student teaching, right?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. What does that mean? I don't even know what that means.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's not a. He's. He's. It's. He's ending his masters or whatever. It's part of your training to become a teacher.

[Mark Norman]

Got it.

[Stavros Halkias]

To student teach for six months or whatever.

[Mark Norman]

Okay, so what if this ruins his.

[Stavros Halkias]

What if this gets back that he was trying to fuck his students siblings. And again that's not being a pedophile. But it is like a strange that we will all admit that is a weird relationship to have with an 11 year old.

[Mark Norman]

It's the weirdest dating app. It's inappropriate.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thank you.

[Mark Norman]

Yes. Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

There's no dating app. That's like have our underage siblings set us up.

[Mark Norman]

Right. Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

So anyway, that's. That's my take on this. You cannot push the envelope. You have to sort of let the. It's kind of like when someone asks, can I get back together with my ex cycle? Look, if you, you fully break up, you fully lead different lives. You're no. You go no contact. And then you happen to come into each other's lives again and hit it off as different, almost essentially different versions of yourselves.

[Mark Norman]

Y.

[Stavros Halkias]

Maybe. But when you try and keep getting back together with someone. It's never going to work.

[Mark Norman]

No, no.

[Stavros Halkias]

And to me this is one of those like, you gotta set it free. There's just a girl. That sounds cool. That you might be able to. Either it happens or it doesn't, but you cannot push the envelope as a student teacher, in my opinion. That's all I'm saying.

[Mark Norman]

We're doing. I say let it ride, buddy. Get that number. I mean, look, I've watched enough incest porn where I'm like, this is wholesome. Yeah, this is nothing.

[Stavros Halkias]

No, I mean, compared to student teacher impropriety, Compared to what a 28 year old man and a 12 year old girl could have as an inappropriate relationship. Yeah, this is nothing.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

But it still is technically an inappropriate.

[Mark Norman]

Well, you're right, but I think it's about how you play it. You go up and go, hey, you want to. Can I get your sister's number in the hallway? You know, the guidance counsel hears that you're going to jail or whatever, you

[Stavros Halkias]

corner her, you say, I have a gun. Something bad is going to happen unless you give me your sister's number. I do.

[Eldis]

I do wonder if there's a small element here. It's like, is this, is this teenage girl just with you too?

[Stavros Halkias]

Very positive.

[Eldis]

Like, you know the girl, oh, you should date my son. Sister.

[Stavros Halkias]

And like here's, here's her number. And they're just with you? Yeah, they're just. Does she even have a sister?

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Is she trying to get you to send her nudes so that she can

[Mark Norman]

accuse you of being.

[Stavros Halkias]

Not that this child is. I'm not trying to make this child out to be a mastermind. But that's possible.

[Mark Norman]

That, I mean, look, he said the sister was hot, so maybe she concocted a photo to just took picture out of a magazine or something.

[Stavros Halkias]

True. Whatever. Look, this could, this could be a very wholesome thing that unfortunately our world has ruined. Right, Right. Once again, not to keep quoting different great bits, but Bill Burr's joke about how pedophiles have ruined like going up to a fat kid and rubbing and giving him a nudge. Yeah, yeah, get out there, fat boy or whatever.

[Mark Norman]

Kids. I'm like, get that thing away.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unfortunately. Because yes, on this is like almost some like 1950s. Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

School teacher.

[Stavros Halkias]

The school teacher. Oh, I, I met your older sister at the sock hop and we hit it off.

[Mark Norman]

Right, Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

But we don't live in that world anymore.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, I guess not.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's, that's gone unfort. Thanks to Florida.

[Eldis]

Thanks.

[Stavros Halkias]

Thanks to the teachers in Florida. That's gone.

[Mark Norman]

Thanks a lot. You ruined everything.

[Stavros Halkias]

So, yeah, man, good luck. Energetically. Maybe put it out there that you want this. You know, Vision boards is about as. It's about as active as you can get. Manifestation is about as active as you

[Mark Norman]

can get, in my opinion. Wait till the semester ends.

[Stavros Halkias]

Mark thinks you should ask for the number.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. I say the sister and the mom have a good time.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then set a timer on your watch for when she turns 18. All right, L.D. what else we got, little buddy?

[Caller]

Yo, Stav. Elvis, esteemed guest, longtime listener, first time caller. I've got a bit of a doozy. It's a longer one, so hang with me. I've been in business with two childhood best friends for the last five years, roughly. We opened a company together after working our 20s in normal corporate jobs, and business has been relatively successful and so far, so good on that front. However, six months ago, one of my business partners broke up with his at the time girlfriend because he took a bunch of Molly and saw one of our employees in a wedding dress and decided to start dating her instead. That relationship has created a massive shift in the power dynamic and definitely some tension between me and my other business partner and him because this employee has been a problem at our company for the entirety of her tenure. She is miserable and depressed all the time. There is no dragging her out of it. She is just an awful, miserable person. Unfortunately, my business partner who started dating her is starting to become an awful, miserable person. So my real question, Saab, is what the hell do we do? Do we confront him and tell him that dating this girl is only creating more problems? Do we just let it ride out and start to cut him out of the business? I'm at a loss as to how to handle this.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is tough.

[Mark Norman]

Poor guy.

[Caller]

Intense. And he is an autistic little cat. Struggles to literally express his emotions outwardly and it's gotten to the point where we just don't want to be around him. So I don't know what you think we should do, but curious to hear your thoughts. Thanks, bud.

[Mark Norman]

Can you explain the. So this is a He broke up with his girlfriend and started dating an employee?

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah, basically, yes. They. They. He started a small business that seems to be going well and he broke up with his girlfriend and started dating an employee. So there's a couple elements to this. First of all, your friend fucked you, right? That's important to note that he's your boy and he completely fucked you. And by the way, starting a business with your friends. You know, I have done it. Obviously, there's huge downsides. Sometimes your best friends barely know how to do their fucking job.

[Mark Norman]

Yep.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would actually love it if Elders was competent and actually started fucking JP on the side. That would actually. That would help stopping Baby Enterprises a lot more.

[Mark Norman]

That'd be a tall baby.

[Stavros Halkias]

Elvis is definitely the one carrying it. Elvis definitely has the birthing hips. But. So, okay, the first thing is there's a business perspective and there's a friendship perspective. And this is also classically why people tell you not to go in business with people very close to you. Right?

[Mark Norman]

Yep.

[Stavros Halkias]

So I think you have to start from the friendship perspective. You have to start from there because this is your boy.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he is, you know, he has trouble, whatever with his feet. Whatever you need to tell him. Like, you gotta figure this shit out.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know, we can't. The other thing is, he's really complicated things. Because it's an employee.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

If it was just. If you just had some dumb bitch girlfriend, you could figure that a little bit. But now they can't fire her. That's a fucking. That's a crazy lawsuit. Probably.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you have to kind of be like, dude, what the fuck are you doing? You have. We have to figure out a way to fucking. Like, you know, this was a mistake. I mean, taking Molly and dating. First of all.

[Caller]

All.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did you ever punish him or did he ever get his comeuppance for dating an employee? That's a very interesting. Like, how small is this company?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Is there an hr? Did you guys say. What the are you doing? You're her boss. You can't do that.

[Mark Norman]

Doesn't sound like it.

[Stavros Halkias]

Probably not. Right. So you have to have a conversation. I don't know how that goes because I don't really even know what you can say to him.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

To get, like, what do you need from him to break up with this person? That has its own.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Well, I think the only thing I can think of is because you can't fire. She might sue. So that sucks. So you gotta go. Anything that happens with her is on you.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

And, like, you can't affect the whole company.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

So maybe you can get that in writing or something. Because, like, you brought this crazy into this situation. So you're responsible for her. So if she tries to. Us sue. Us.

[Stavros Halkias]

Us.

[Mark Norman]

You're gonna have to deal with that. I don't know. This is a tough one. Or just break up. Try to break up with her.

[Stavros Halkias]

I, I think yes. I think like this is really, this is a difficult.

[Mark Norman]

You could do a us or her kind of thing. You get the two friends, like break up with her, stay with the job.

[Eldis]

Or I think, I think a good starting place might be like, do you even understand like what happened here with your friend? He's essentially describing this guy. Guy blowing his life up. Like he took Molly, he dated, he broke up with his long term ex. And I don't know what, what he

[Mark Norman]

meant like the wedding dress.

[Eldis]

Saw one of our employees.

[Stavros Halkias]

He had a vision. He had a vision of this, of a depressed woman.

[Mark Norman]

I didn't get that either.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's how it felt like to me anyway.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, this guy sucks. Yeah. Vision.

[Eldis]

But it's like what it's. That sounds like, you know, I don't know how old they are. Quarter life, middle midlife crisis. Something where you're just like, well, first

[Stavros Halkias]

of all, even if leaving the corporate world and starting a business, that's a little midlife, quarter life crisis right there, it's positive because you want to be like the corp. I don't want to be a corporate slave. I want to start something with my friends. So yeah, maybe all of them are. Have a little bit of that going on.

[Caller]

Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

But I do think so. There's the friend portion. And you do have to have a tough. And that's a good point. Sorry to cut you off because I think you're right. We need to have the conversation that's like, what the happened, man?

[Mark Norman]

Can we start?

[Stavros Halkias]

Can we start there?

[Mark Norman]

There.

[Stavros Halkias]

How are you feeling it? Don't even make it about her specifically. Be like, dude, I'll be honest. You've been a little erratic. You've been a little all over the place. Your mood, don't, don't link it to her. Just be like, you seem to have gotten more depressed. Like, let's talk about how you're feeling. Like, is everything like, you know, we've had a couple crazy years. Because that's the other thing. When you have a successful business popping off, it is like you don't really have time to reflect. That's a classic. Pour everything into the business. Don't think.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, right.

[Stavros Halkias]

So maybe you could be like, hey man, we've been doing this for a couple years. Shit's kind of stable. What the fuck's going on? We feel like shit's going a little. You feel like, you feel a little depressed, you feel a little erratic. You broke up with what's her face. You're with. You start dating an Employee. You kind of fucked us there. Let's talk about it and really go to him as friends first and foremost. But then you also have to have the business side of it, right? Yeah, it's like. And look like if Elvis was ultimately doing something, was fucking things up so, so bad, I would just have to be like. Like if Else was fucking addicted to fucking drugs, cheating on his wife on the road, I'd be like, all right, man, well, you're suspended indefinitely.

[Mark Norman]

Sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

You have to go to fucking rehab. You have to figure your shit out. You're my boy and right now you're fucking both our relationship and our business up. So I'm not going to fire you, but I am going to say you can't fucking be here until you finish. Figure your shit out.

[Mark Norman]

But he's also sane. I mean, you know, the other guy they talk about, he's like a weirdo,

[Stavros Halkias]

but we're talking about a scenario where he's not. He's lost his life. Okay, okay, like. And so that's. So you gotta approach him as a friend first. But you have a fucking business here. And I hate to. And there are obviously things that are more important than business. You know, we are an anti capitalist podcast here. We don't think just money for money's sake will make you happy. There's nothing wrong with having a successful business, but putting just success over everything's a mistake. But also, if you're running a business, you want to make sure it's fucking functional. And if one of your friends is fucking it up, you can be like, hey, after we've had the discussion about you as our boy, this has bled into the business and now you've kind of fucked a couple things up where you're dating an employee, that's a fucking nightmare. We might have to demote you on paper or we might have to do something because like, now you know the. You don't want. You can't. You don't want it to be behind his back because you don't want business to of destroy your relationship. He's you. You want to give him the opportunity to redeem himself. But then if he just. If he's like you, it's love. How dare you talk to me this way. Then he's decided, okay, fine, we're in a corporate now. It's like us versus you.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

And then you do maybe have to cut him out or just sort of like have him have less decision making or whatever. Yeah, or buy him out.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Because two against one now.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah.

[Mark Norman]

And if you pick her over the company, it's not a good sign for the company.

[Stavros Halkias]

So I think the. The way to do it is to give your boy because the cold hearted way is cut him out business wise. It's like he fucked you behind his back.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Come up with a plan to cut him out of your business.

[Mark Norman]

Right, right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because he's a headache. Whatever. That's the smart on paper move.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

The human thing to do. Because he's. And by the way, if he wasn't one of your best friends, I would even say that might be the smart thing to do do. Because he's clearly putting your business in jeopardy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

The fact he's one of your best friends means you have to do a. What is not smart from a business standpoint and approach him with all your cards on the table and be like, yeah, I care about you. Let's figure your shit out. Here's how you fuck the company. Here's how we need to fix it. And if he. If he takes that personally and he's like, fuck you. Whatever. That was your attempt at being the bigger man.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, that's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he kind of squandered it.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, he did.

[Stavros Halkias]

By the way, he did you again. If eldest got up and posted his dick on my YouTube and got it taken down.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would kill him.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would beat the out of him.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

I would. I wouldn't cut him out of my life again because he is my best friend. Yeah. But there would be a. There would be retribution, let's say.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And this guy needs to understand he's kind of you. And you can still be the bigger person and not be a cold hearted businessman first and foremost. But if he pushes your hand, you can still just cut him out because he did you. I think that's sort of. After thinking about it, I feel like that's right to me.

[Mark Norman]

There you go. I mean, I wish we knew what they covered. It'd be great if it was like Truth Social or something. The guys that did only fans.

[Stavros Halkias]

Black rifle coffee. That would be awesome if we have

[Mark Norman]

some troop coffee, right? Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. It's probably. Yeah. It's gonna be such a. It's like we do so remember Chia Pets? We're doing.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

We've. We have a licensing deal with like Hasbro. Low level.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Anyway, that's an interesting one.

[Mark Norman]

That is tough.

[Stavros Halkias]

And I bet you this guy is just. This is classic quarter life midlife crisis.

[Mark Norman]

Sounds like I started a business.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's dating the wrong. He's Dating a depressed girl with bangs and piercings, probably. He's never tasted depressed in his life. He thinks it's the elixir.

[Eldis]

He.

[Stavros Halkias]

He never was a open micr in his twenties.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean.

[Mark Norman]

He owns a company now. She's beneath him. I'm sure he's never had that before.

[Stavros Halkias]

Of course, of course. A lot of problems here. This episode of Stavi's World is sponsored by Twisted Tea. What's up, Brodies? Oh, the days, they're getting. They're getting warmer, but they. They can still be cold. We're in spring. Sometimes that sun. That sun feels like it's gone by 4:30. Luckily, there's a simple way to make those dark afternoons feel a little more enjoyable. Bow down to Twisted Tea, the king of hard iced teas. Twisted Tea is smooth as Helen made with real brewed tea. No weird flavors, no pretending to be something fancy, just refreshing. Easy to drink hard iced tea that somehow makes winter hangouts feel way less bleak. Snow outside, bring the good times indoors. Just you, your friends, a cozy couch, a fireplace and a Saturday you've been waiting on all week. Oh yeah, and some freaking twisted teas. Conversations loosen up, laughs come easier, and suddenly winter don't feel quite so aggressive, do it? And at 5% alcohol, it's got enough kick to make things fun without going overboard. Crack open a can of Twisted Tea, keep it twisted. Must be 21 plus. Please drink responsibly. Fuck. Hit us with another one, little Eldons.

[Caller]

Hi, Styles. Me and my husband are in a non monogamous relationship. I don't really date that much, mostly because I hate people.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure.

[Caller]

But he's very outgoing, so he does have like a few girlfriends.

[Stavros Halkias]

Respect.

[Caller]

Unfortunately, every time he gets a girlfriend, they want to have sex with me. I don't. I mean, they want to have sex with him too, but I don't want to have sex with them. Like I barely want to have sex with my husband. Monogamous relations.

[Stavros Halkias]

What's going on? This is interesting. I'd love to talk to her.

[Caller]

How would you. Tell these girls that you don't want to have sex with them in a way that makes them want to continue having sex with my.

[Stavros Halkias]

Your husband?

[Mark Norman]

This is crazy. I can't believe my wife called in.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. Oh, dude, why? Yeah, why the. Did you patch in Mark's live voicemails?

[Mark Norman]

This is a wild one.

[Stavros Halkias]

This is a good one. This is a real. I'd love to talk to this person on a live call because I think it's Very interesting to think of a non monogamous relationship working solely because, you know, we get questions about mismatched sex drives a lot.

[Mark Norman]

Sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

And there's something kind of nice about someone who's not really like a weird poly sex nerd, but she just seems to be a kind of an open minded person who's like, look, I don't like that much. I love my husband. If he wants to go out and girls and he wears a condom and it's safe, great. Yeah, I respect. That's kind of. You never hear about polyamorous relationships that are purely about like logistics.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. You know, it's usually about like feet,

[Stavros Halkias]

touchy feeling, weird kind of people trying to get over some kind of sexual trauma. Just some kind of weird relationship to sex. This is a very pragmatic one that it's kind of fun and fun to talk about.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. And also they're trying to bang her and she's not into it. That's also rare. Most of the girls like, let's all fuck and let's be together.

[Stavros Halkias]

Which is probably my read is that these women want to sort of. Because these are all clearly people who are very comfortable in being in a polyamorous, non monogamous situation. To me, it's almost like when you're the girlfriend that gets to the wife, that kind of co signs you as like a, an upper tier girlfriend. It kind of in the, in the haram power rankings.

[Mark Norman]

Yes. Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you're the one who got to be in the threesome with the wife, you sort of have her blessed blessing. Almost as the top. As the top concubine.

[Mark Norman]

Very interesting.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's my guess is that there is some kind of psychology here.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. I conquered the husband and the wife.

[Stavros Halkias]

Right?

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

The wife gives me her tacit approval.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

And you know, maybe they're just, you know, also maybe they just, you know, they want to you. They think you're hot. Whatever. That makes sense too.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But how do you tell them? How about you? I don't think that's a big problem. No, I think your boy, your. Your husband and his girlfriends can each other other. Like if they really want a threesome, you know, they, they'll. I don't think this is a big deal. You could just be like, I'm not really into it. By the way. He's in a great setup.

[Mark Norman]

This guy.

[Stavros Halkias]

This guy.

[Mark Norman]

Nothing to complain about.

[Stavros Halkias]

This guy's not gonna be like, oh, come on.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

Why would you have a threes with me and my girlfriend?

[Mark Norman]

No, he's.

[Stavros Halkias]

He's pretty pumped.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You don't even really date. And I would ask, is this a like, just look, maybe I'm just being too. After praising it, now I got to play the opposite, which is like is, you know, it's in the news right now. Are you in a Lindy west situation? You know, you sound kind of sad.

[Mark Norman]

Are you just.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are you just a depressed person? That's okay. Listen, if you're a depressed person or maybe you just have a flat affect, maybe you're very happy and maybe you don't have a high sex drive, that's okay. But by the way, being depra. Lack of sex drive is part of depression sometimes for certain people.

[Mark Norman]

That's true. That's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

Did you used to have a high sex drive? Did you used to be more outgoing? And because, you know, you didn't even say like, he's less horny than me. You're like, he's a more outgoing guy.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Maybe you're just a homebody who does. She said she doesn't like people, that's fine.

[Mark Norman]

Doesn't like her husband.

[Stavros Halkias]

She said you don't even like. So now maybe this is best case scenario. You're kind of like ace almost asexual y and you do have a true romantic and even platonic and life partner love with your husband. And you're like, yeah, it's not that important to me. Me, I don't care if he girls great. But I am curious, is that really the case? Because you just sounded a little sad to me.

[Mark Norman]

Agreed.

[Stavros Halkias]

And it's like, I'd love to. I want to make sure you are actually okay with this is kind of my thought.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Cuz is anybody really okay with this? We do a lot of poly stuff, but a lot of it falls apart. A lot of it ends in drama.

[Stavros Halkias]

Sure, I, I agree. And I think what unlocked me was when people are like, well, well, what about regular marriages? When a polyp person's like, okay, yeah, our relations do end bad. What about your relationship?

[Mark Norman]

That's a good point.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's actually one of their best counters.

[Mark Norman]

That's pretty good.

[Stavros Halkias]

When I heard that because I used to love arguing with, you know, my, like, I, I have like friends back home who were like, really like. Because look, to me, I think they just reinvented cheating.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, exactly. They branded it.

[Stavros Halkias]

When someone is like, when someone is like, I'm solo poly, it's like, like you're just getting pussy. You're getting dick.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Solo poly means you're single. People say they're solo but polyamorous.

[Mark Norman]

Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

Which means they're not in a relationship, but they're just letting everybody know if we ever got in a relationship, I would also need to other people.

[Mark Norman]

Dang.

[Stavros Halkias]

Which to me just means like, no, you're just. You're really just dating.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's like a lot of this is just rebranded.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

And listen to me. I think I could see myself being in a. You could argue. I have been in open relationships with all the girls I've dated in the last couple years because I've never been in a committed relationship.

[Mark Norman]

Sure.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I have. You know, I've seen. There's people in my life that I see on a regular basis, whatever, by accident, you kind of enter into one of those. But it's like. Yes. I think the amount of people that this really works for is probably really small.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But I do think if it does work, it's. It is a situation. It is the best case situation of this one, which is like, yeah, I've. I'm just. It doesn't bother me, and I don't want to fuck that much, and this is just who I am. So maybe that's just who you are. But to. My antenna are up.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like, let's. Let's examine this.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

Are you actually happy?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You know what I mean?

[Mark Norman]

Because if you're really into the poly world, you would be kind of like, oh, the husband and the new girl want to fuck me. Yeah. Like, at least be flattered by it. She even seemed flattered.

[Stavros Halkias]

Even as someone who doesn't like dating very much because you don't like seeing other people. It's like. Well, ostensibly, you trust your husband's judgment.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly.

[Stavros Halkias]

And so this is actually an easy way for you. You. If you.

[Mark Norman]

If you weren't social but horny silver platter.

[Stavros Halkias]

My husband's already, you know, vetted her.

[Mark Norman]

Exactly. If you're.

[Stavros Halkias]

By which I assume, you know, yeah,

[Mark Norman]

she's got to be fun.

[Eldis]

But anyway, that's even the way she's framing it. It makes her husband, like, sound so passive or something. And it's like, how could I just keep these on his dick and keep the intimacy and sex completely outsourced so I don't have to, like, deal about, like, worrying with that with him.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Right. Yeah. He's living. He's busy, this guy.

[Eldis]

Like, does he even notice that.

[Stavros Halkias]

That she's kind of sad?

[Eldis]

That you're kind of sad.

[Mark Norman]

Sound like it. Or he just. All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. The thing tomorrow. The thing that shocks Me is the idea that you would be. You would have found someone you want to be with, and then you're still on Tinder.

[Mark Norman]

Like, to me, it's a lot of work.

[Stavros Halkias]

I knew. I've known people who are in open relationships, and it's like. And they really do like their partners. And I'm like, you guys got it.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

You want to go have a first date?

[Mark Norman]

I know. Get to know somebody.

[Stavros Halkias]

Some of them don't even just. If they just out. I kind of. I'd understand that way more where it's like, look, we're adults. Yeah, every once in a while, but it doesn't mean anything. Who cares? But these are people who have multiple girlfriends and, you know, whatever. So anyway, I would examine it, but also, your actual problem does not sound like a problem.

[Mark Norman]

No, you got it. You got it made. You don't want to fuck your husband, and somebody else is doing it, and you have to turn them down a few times. You're. You're good. You're cruising.

[Stavros Halkias]

But is that her problem overall, is the lack of communication? Because if she doesn't know how to say this, she definitely doesn't know how to say more complicated.

[Mark Norman]

That's true. That's true.

[Stavros Halkias]

If she has any nuanced issues with their arrangement, she has no way of. Of. Of voicing that. But, yeah, I would love to see if you can contact her. I'd love to talk to her on a. On a live call. Yeah, I'd love to get to the bot. To get to the bottom of this.

[Mark Norman]

And to your point about the marriage also falling apart apart because poly falls apart. Poly, you break up. There's no legal right. There's no money. There's no, like, prenup or lawsuit or lawyers or anything.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or does it end up worse where now you have to pay four people? Look, I'm not giving my wife's boyfriend Jonathan a scent.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, that could be a bit.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yeah. All right, I'll write it down. The fourth hour. We got to get that going. Going. Little Eldy, why don't you play us something fun to go out on, little buddy?

[Eldis]

Sure. Let's try this one on for size.

[Caller]

Eldest guest. So my name is a family name that's been in my family for several generations now. And the name itself, like, first and last name together are kind of hilarious. It sounds like a, like, a porn star's name. It's something along the lines of like. Like, Hugh Johnson or something like that. Obviously not my real name, but it's an awesome name. And dick Nothing but like a great asset in my life, to be honest. The girls love it.

[Mark Norman]

The guys love it even more. Yeah.

[Caller]

Now when it comes to my wife,

[Stavros Halkias]

what do you think his name is?

[Caller]

Dick Hard.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Dick Rock. Right?

[Stavros Halkias]

Dick Rock would be an awesome.

[Mark Norman]

Dick Rock is a great name. Dick Rock. Lukewarm.

[Stavros Halkias]

Keep going. Eld.

[Caller]

My wife and potentially keeping the name in our family, she's totally against it. She thinks it's a ridiculous name. Which I kind of agree with. But like I said, it's done nothing but do great things in my life. So the question is, keep the name or not. Thanks. Appreciate you guys love the show.

[Stavros Halkias]

I mean, I'd love to know your real name.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

But you gotta keep the name.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah. Come on.

[Stavros Halkias]

If it's a generational thing. Look, it's one thing if you have a generational name. Like, I've known people who are like, you know, whatever, Stanley, whatever. The. The ninth or this. Like, I knew somebody who has like somebody. The six. His son would have been the sixth or the seventh.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

And he's like, that's cool. But also my experience it with that. And they're not rich or anything. People expect you to be some. Like.

[Mark Norman]

Some air.

[Stavros Halkias]

Some air. And he had a horrible time with it and he just decided we're stopping it.

[Mark Norman]

Wow.

[Stavros Halkias]

Because it wasn't. He doesn't really feel any connection. Whatever. And it's like, okay, that's totally your decision. But if this has been in around the family for generations and it's funny and you like it, that's the main thing. And. And here's the thing. You can change the kid's name, right. If they don't like it. Or they can go by, you know, Junior.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Or whatever. The. I think you got. Personally, I think you got to keep it. And I think where you up was not having this conversation with your wife earlier. You know what I mean? Cuz, man. And look, maybe it's not a deal breaker for him. Maybe he's like. To me, I'm just. I still can't get Dick Rock out of my head.

[Mark Norman]

Or like Dick Pounder.

[Stavros Halkias]

Who is what? The. The Seattle. The quarterbacks. His grandfather was named something hilarious.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, really?

[Stavros Halkias]

Can you look it up? Sam Darnold, grandfather. He was the original, like Marlboro man. And he was named like Dick. Honestly, not far off. It was Dick something. Dick Stroker or some like that Damn.

[Eldis]

Dick Hammer.

[Stavros Halkias]

Dick Hammer.

[Mark Norman]

Dude, that sounds like one of the Trump's operations. Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Operation Dick Hammer. We're giving Israel all of Europe for Operation Righteous Dick Hammer.

[Mark Norman]

That Dick is circumcised. Dick Hammer. I mean, come on. That's.

[Stavros Halkias]

Anyway, so let's just say it's Dick Hammer.

[Mark Norman]

Okay. Okay.

[Stavros Halkias]

And your wife wants to make your son's name Gregory Hammer. Frank. Oh, the Frank Hammer sounds pretty good too.

[Mark Norman]

Hammer's not bad, but it's not.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're getting bogged down in Hammer.

[Caller]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

But the idea that I had Dick Hammer in my family, and I willingly chose not to bestow that on my son, that pisses me the off.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

The idea that you would not keep your hilarious name. And again, he loved it.

[Mark Norman]

Right.

[Stavros Halkias]

If you had an experience where you're like, this sucked. People treat. I got made fun of. And look, let's be honest.

[Mark Norman]

You.

[Stavros Halkias]

You might not have your. Your kid might have a. The kind of dispensation where they don't like it, and that's all right. Nicknames exist, name changes exist. Who cares? I think you at least have to give. When it comes to tradition, if it's something you like, I think you got to give it a shot.

[Mark Norman]

Can you go, oh, so can you go legal name, but then have a nickname? You know, like, give the kid the name, but just call him something else?

[Eldis]

Dick is so good, because if they don't with it when they grow up,

[Stavros Halkias]

we don't know that it's Dick.

[Eldis]

Go, Richard. I know, but as an example, it's like, is your name something that could go by those same rules? Is there a lot.

[Stavros Halkias]

I wish you told us his name so we could work really hard.

[Mark Norman]

I know. Because Hammer, you could do Jack. Yeah. Jackhammer. I mean, there's a lot of fun things to do.

[Stavros Halkias]

Anyway, text. Text elders your actual name, and we'll think about it.

[Mark Norman]

Yes, please. And text me later, because I'm curious,

[Stavros Halkias]

too, but I. I am firmly in the camp. And look, obviously, you're appealing to us. We're stupid, right?

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

We're the kind of people that if we met a guy named Dick Hammer at a bar, we were buying him drinks all night. We were taking him out. We were trying to make him our best friend.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

On the strength of his name being Dick Hammer or, you know, Dick Rock or whatever.

[Mark Norman]

Jack off me.

[Stavros Halkias]

But so whatever. But I do think there. Even you take that out of the mix. I think in general, family and tradition, as long as it's not. It doesn't, you know, stop you from developing a sense of. Of individualism. As long as there's nothing, you know, that you're embarrassed by or they did anything up, because that's another problem with like, tradition. It's like some of the most, like, you know, some of the most storied New York families. It's like you go to all the streets in like, Brook. Like Stuyvesant.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's basically a list of slave owners in New York.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, Anti Semites.

[Stavros Halkias]

So unfortunately, sometimes tradition does interact with some.

[Mark Norman]

Of course, unchill things all the time.

[Stavros Halkias]

But if it's just stuff funny.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah, it's fun. What do you got, like Rusty Hog?

[Stavros Halkias]

You know Rusty Hogger. Yeah, I would love that, man. So anyway, you got to keep it. You're witch. I get where she's coming from too,

[Mark Norman]

but her name's Harry K. That's a guy. Wait,

[Stavros Halkias]

Harrietta. Harrietta.

[Mark Norman]

There we go.

[Stavros Halkias]

Yes. Keep the name and let us know what it actually is. We want to know.

[Mark Norman]

Diana know.

[Stavros Halkias]

He didn't tell you secretly in any back channel, did he? Eldest.

[Eldis]

I just sent out the text. Let's see if we get it.

[Stavros Halkias]

We will not get it in the 10 seconds. A small one.

[Mark Norman]

Just a pooper.

[Stavros Halkias]

That's gonna do it for us, folks. Go watch the special.

[Mark Norman]

Yes.

[Stavros Halkias]

None too pleased on Netflix right now. And yeah, thank you for. I guess we're done touring eldis. Oh, actually, I just filmed my. I just filmed my special.

[Mark Norman]

There you go. All right.

[Stavros Halkias]

Just two days ago, I was filming my special.

[Mark Norman]

Hell yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Anyway, that's gonna do it for us, folks. Thank you. Go see Mark on the road. Listen. Go listen to Tuesdays. Listen to. We might be drunk. You do, you do really? You do podcasts with two of my favorite guys in the world.

[Mark Norman]

Oh, yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

I didn't really think about that.

[Mark Norman]

Two of the funniest guys, Sam and

[Stavros Halkias]

Joe, really are like my boy. Maybe the two and Soder.

[Mark Norman]

Yeah.

[Stavros Halkias]

Like who once I moved, were like so over the top. Nice to me that it was like that. I was like, man, what's going on here?

[Mark Norman]

We got a good crew out there.

[Stavros Halkias]

Good crew. Good crew. Anyway, that's going to do it for us, folks. We will talk to you next week. Bye bye.