In this episode, Alan Briggs sits down with Stu Davis, Executive Director of COS I Love You — a Colorado Springs organization that brokers connection between the church, nonprofits, business, and public sector for a candid, practical conversation about what it actually looks like to expand your network without it feeling slimy, transactional, or just plain weird.

This one was recorded live in a room full of leaders, and the energy of that conversation comes through. Alan and Stu have both spent years learning, and sometimes failing at the craft of genuine connection, and in this episode they pull back the curtain on how they think about it, how they've had to mature in it, and what separates the connectors who build real trust from the ones who just work a room.

If you've ever walked away from a networking event feeling like you needed a shower, this episode is for you.

What You'll Learn in This Episode:

Why networking feels slimy — and the one thing that makes the difference between transactional and transformational connection
The "engagement funnel" framework: how relationships move from acquaintance to friend to partner to collaborator to team — and why skipping steps is where things go wrong
Why you should always state your agenda upfront — and how doing so actually builds more trust, not less
The abundance vs. scarcity mentality in practice — including a story about a colleague who said one thing and did another
What the best connectors do that most people don't — and why being only a connector isn't enough
Alan's five-part framework for moving from intuitive to intentional connecting: grid, filters, environments, processes, and multiplication
The green-light introduction — what it is, when to give it, and why it's one of the highest forms of relational trust
Why name-dropping usually backfires — and what to do instead when you need to establish credibility
How one dinner unlocked over $110,000 in business for Alan — and the mindset shift that almost made him say no
Why "needy is creepy" — and what it looks like to refer someone to a competitor and actually gain trust by doing it
The one question to always ask at the end of a meeting: "Is there any way I can serve you?"

Reflection Questions:

Who in your network do two people you know need to meet — and what's stopping you from making that introduction?
Are you operating from an abundance mentality or a scarcity mentality — and would the people around you agree with your answer?
Have you moved from intuitive to intentional in how you connect people, or are you still running it all out of your head?

Resources Mentioned:

COS I Love You: https://cosiloveyou.com/about-us/
Who Not How — Dan Sullivan (referenced by Alan)
Right Side Up Journal — available on Amazon
H2 Leadership Coaching — h2leadership.com

About Stu Davis: Stu Davis is the Executive Director of COS I Love You, an organization in Colorado Springs that sits at the intersection of church and city — brokering relationships and building collaborative opportunities between nonprofits, faith communities, businesses, and public sector leaders.

Want more? Visit h2leadership.com for coaching, resources, and tools to help you lead well.

Leadership is complex, but it doesn't have to be lonely. Let's get after it.