← Stay True with Madison Prewett Troutt
Stay True with Madison Prewett Troutt
My Best Friend's POV On My Bachelor Journey with Erica Hardesty
01:05:15
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- [00:00]
A
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B
Do you feel passionate about human trafficking, homelessness, incarceration rates or teen pregnancies? Then you need to be passionate about foster care.
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A
Can you kind of give like some statistics around foster care and how it affects us?
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B
The system as a whole is broken. It will take a miracle to fix what it is.
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A
Now what would you go back and tell that Erica and Maddie?
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B
There's going to be heartbreak and was plenty of that, but it shapes you and it grows you.
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A
What were your like actual real thoughts when I was like, hey, I'm going to go on the Bachelor?
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B
Honestly thought like you were pranking me. Let's not put a band aid on things. Let's get to the root cause. The Lord sees everything and he is truly always working behind the scenes.
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A
We're going to be like really getting vulnerable and going there. Erica and I go way back.
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B
Like as far back as you can go.
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A
What's up guys? Welcome back to another episode of Stay True podcast. I'm your host, Madison Pruitt Trout and I have on the podcast with me a very, very, very special guest because it is my best friend, Erica Hardesty. Welcome to the Stay True podcast. Erica and I go way back.
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B
Way back.
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A
We go way, way back.
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B
Like as far back as you can go.
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A
And we're gonna be spilling so much. Not tea because this is all about Jesus for sure. And we don't believe in spilling tea. But like we're gonna be like really getting vulnerable and going there. So I'm super excited. But Erica has a. The cutest flower store, company shop, all the things called Noella's. And with love.
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B
Yep.
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A
And you guys should check that out. And she also has. Has make it Matter, which is. I want you to tell us a little bit about it. But first, I have to say, at one point, Erica and I were like, we're gonna start our own. We're gonna start our own, like, nonprofit, and we're gonna make it. So. Okay, let me back up a little bit more. Erica and I got our first job out of college in foster care and adoption.
- [03:05]
B
Yes, we did.
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A
Together. And so I actually had zero experience, unlike you. You had lots of experience and you got your degree. Like, for that. I was like, I don't really know what I bring to the Were. Like, you will be good at marketing. So I just, like, went on news channels and talked about the need for foster parents.
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B
And you did amazing.
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A
It was a good time.
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B
Incredible.
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A
It was like my pre. It was my warm up before the podcast, for sure. Yeah. So anyways. But we were like, a good team because she. I like, did the very entry level work, and then she did everything. I don't know how else to help you. You. Some cold calls.
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B
Listen, but that was our first job
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A
right out of college together.
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B
Yeah.
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A
And we did that for a little bit.
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B
Were you.
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A
You stayed longer than I did.
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B
I was there three years.
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A
Oh, yeah. Nope. You were there one year.
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B
Were you there a year?
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A
Yeah, maybe less.
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B
I think it was like nine.
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A
It was like, maybe a few months. No, it was close to a year. I think it was close to a year.
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B
You were right.
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A
Because it was right. I think we were like. I was coming up on a year when the. The Bachelor called me. Yeah. So you guys. Crazy time. But anyways, we also. When I came, I think it was before the Bachelor. After the Bachelor, that's when we were like, we should start our own nonprofit for foster care. And that lasted for maybe a week.
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B
It was called Fostering Hope.
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A
Oh, that's actually kind of cute. I know.
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B
It was super cute. A lot of other people have used it, but it's really cute.
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A
So that one didn't stick. But you did start make it Matter, and it's actually crushing it. Tell us about that because it's actually so incredible. And I love the name. So, like, tell me, how did you even come up with that name?
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B
Listen, the name, oddly enough, came to me in Paris.
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A
Oh, I love that.
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B
Yeah. So I went on a very unexpected Trip to Paris. And it was like completely paid for. It was so kind, just incredible. I was like a model for this company. And I got there and they didn't need a model, so I just got to be in Paris. It was wonderful. But literally the last day, I was walking down the streets and there was the cutest little boutique and there was a T shirt in the, like, window of the store and it said make it matter. And I was like, I could literally preach about that. Like, that little phrase right there. I could take and write a whole sermon. Did not know what I was going to do with it, but I went in and bought the shirt. They said there was only one shirt of that kind, so it's still sitting in my closet. But that is how the name came to be. And then the vision came later.
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A
Yeah. So what is Make It Better?
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B
Yeah. So it is our non profit organization that supports youth who are transitioning out of foster care into independent living. And so I'll go into all the details later. But it really. We start with kids when they turn 13 years old. We partner with them in the school systems, provide mentorship opportunities for them. And then really, as they're getting ready to transition out of foster care, which in Alabama is at 19 years old, they then, we want to help create a very successful pathway for them, giving them an opportunity to kind of dream and pursue a future that maybe they didn't know that they could have. And so we are working to raise funds to build an apartment complex for this population because over 20,000 kids age out every year. Yeah.
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A
And you guys. And we're going to talk more about it towards the, like, middle slash end of the podcast, because it's actually crazy. I mean, I remember when I started, like, going on, like, the different news outlets and channels and like, talking about the need for foster parents and the problem and epidemic with this, like, growing foster youth and all the things and the aging out and the issues there. And just, I mean, it is so sad, like, what we're. We're dealing with. And also how many people truly are so uneducated, like, just unaware of the foster care system. And we as a family, like my family, also fostered a little girl who's so precious. I found little. I found pictures of her the other day and Hosanna kind of looks like her. No, no. It's actually crazy. I have to show you. They kind of like, favor in the stage that, like, Hosanna's in right now. And it's like one photo that I came across of her in the past, I was like, wow, wow, that's actually insane. But I got to. I really got to kind of see it from now. We did more of, like, respite care, but I got to see it from that side. And yeah, I just. It's so. It's such a needed, like, beautiful calling that we all have. And, like, I want to talk more about that in a bit of. Just like, how can we all, like, be a part of this and, like, learn more about it as you share just, like, more about foster care and everything under that umbrella. But Eric and I met in college and we met. I guess we met at church.
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B
I think so.
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A
Yeah, at church. Church of highlights. And we, I mean, literally spent, I think, 36, maybe 40 hours a week at church. It was our full time minimum. Minimum, for sure. And we were. I mean, but it was, like, truly so, so fun. We had the best time. I mean, we had our little friend group and we were a big part of the college ministry there and just like, helping run specifically, like, the women's side of things. And you've always been so good at, like, making things beautiful and, like, being creative. And you had this one thing that blew my mind was the one time you did this. You put cinnamon rolls into the waffle maker. You got very. So good. You can put cinnamon rolls, like the raw cinnamon roll dough into, like, a waffle maker thing. And. And they're done, like in.
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B
In like one minute.
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A
In one minute.
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B
And then the little grooves hold all of the frosting.
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A
You guys, you just learned a fun fact. But anyways, she blew my mind. But we just, like, hit it off so fast. But I would say we probably got closer towards the end of college into, like, graduating college. But first I want to just, like, reminisce and talk about what those college years were like. Thinking back to who we were in college. I mean, man, so different.
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B
So different.
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A
But also I remember having this moment with you in the car. We were sitting out. So Eric and I lived together. Was it senior year?
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B
Senior year.
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A
And Creekside, baby, shout out. And we were having this conversation and we were like, man, we feel called to, like, be a part of, like, bridging the gap between those who, like, don't know Jesus and the lost of the world, the broken of the world.
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B
And.
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A
And like, the church and, like, how can we bring that together? And we just kind of felt like a little lost. Like, okay, shouldn't we, like, want to just, like, become on staff at the church? Like, that's where we're spending all of our time. But, like, why is there such tension? And we also were. I think you were dating David at the time. No. Yes.
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B
The tail end. Yeah, I think so.
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A
But anyways, we've walked each other through, like, different relationships, through breakups, through marriage, through kids, through the bachelor, everything in between. So many things. I just. It's so crazy. And I want to like, kind of park here for just a second on, like, what would you go back and tell that Erica and Maddie, you know, when they were in their 20s, their early 20s, and you know, junior senior in college, with all they were feeling, with all they were wrestling with, maybe going through a breakup, maybe just started dating. You just started dating, maybe. David, what would you go back and say?
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B
Man, there's honestly so many things I would say that I really needed to hear. Like, I really needed to hear. But I think one of the things. And this is so simple but truly, like, it's all gonna work out. Like, I remember specifically senior year and I remember talking to you so much about this. And I think Mama Pru, too, I was just like, sharing all this with as well. But of just like, the Lord sees everything and he is truly always working behind the scenes. Like, I just remember always saying, like, there were so many puzzle pieces floating in the air of my life. I knew I wanted to get my degree in social work. Didn't know what that was going to look like. But then had this call to maybe vocational ministry. Wasn't really sure. Didn't exactly feel totally right, but I didn't know where else to put that. And we had a lot of people speaking into us, not in a bad way, but just saying, like, hey, you feel called to ministry? This is what it looks like, you know, inside the four walls. But it just didn't really sit right with my soul either. And I allowed the unknown, I think, to dictate my emotions, to dictate my, like, stress level anxiety. Just was constantly feeling overwhelmed by where to go next. And it really wasn't until I finally just took the reins off of my own life and realized I keep getting in my own way. Like, I really. You hear the term all the time. Self sabotaging. Like, I really unintentionally was because I was trying to pull the reins and hold it in any way that I could. When the Lord is like, I am literally just waiting for you to let go. And then I will pick them back up and show you where to go. And so just looking back at younger me and you and just saying it, it all falls into place. You know there's going to be heartbreak. There was plenty of that. You know all about it. I know all about yours. Plenty of that. But it shapes you and it grows you, and the Lord is good and faithful in it. And the life that I'm sitting in and living now. Could never told you I was going to be a florist. Could have never told you I was going to own a nonprofit. I knew I always wanted to be a wife. I knew I always wanted to be a mom, but I didn't know how that was going to come to be. And it's so much more beautiful than ever anything that I put together on my own.
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A
So crazy thinking about that. Yeah. We would have never. If you would have. If us now, would have sat down with us then in the car and been like, this is gonna be your life, and this is gonna be what you're doing, and this is what life is gonna. We just. I think I would have laughed for sure. I. I think I would have judged myself.
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B
No, me too.
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A
I've been like, like, oh, you went
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B
on the Bachelor, and Erica, you opened up a flower shop. Why?
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A
Okay. Okay, sure. I literally can't. It is so. It is so wild. But that year of senior year, we had the best time. There was a. There was one snow day. Oh, my gosh, it was so epic. We put all of the beds, mattresses together in the living room. We turned on Christmas movies. Erica made her famous walk, and we had soups, and we had so good. So fun.
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B
I remember David coming in randomly for whatever reason, in his big, like, snow boots. I don't remember what he was doing, but that's all.
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A
He was just prepped. That is so funny. Do you think I was a good roommate?
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B
I think you were a great roommate.
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A
Tell me the truth.
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B
No, I genuinely do. I'm laughing.
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A
Was there something that surprised you about me being me as a.
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B
No, to be honest.
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A
Tell me.
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B
I look back. Oh, gosh, no, not on you. Myself.
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A
No, tell me.
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B
I want to know. No, you were great. Truly, you were great. Listen, Maddie is very organized, very type A in a lot of ways.
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A
I am very type A in a
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B
lot, which is beautiful, except when your best friend's not.
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A
But that's our good balance.
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B
It's true. But I was like, man. I just look back and I'm like, you were probably. And it's okay. You were probably so annoyed and disgusting.
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A
No, I wasn't. But we did. I did have a sit down conversation with you.
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B
You did? In Sonic. Was it in Sonic. That one or the other one?
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A
I'm so sad because I think about it all.
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B
Wait, tell me.
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A
I.
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B
Like, it must have scarred you more than me because I don't know, because
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A
literally I'm like, why was I so intense?
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B
Was it about.
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A
I was so intense for what reason? I literally was like, I'm so nervous. I think I literally told you in all for joy. I think I was like. I think I said, guys, we've got to have our house be more orderly because you know what the Bible says that God cannot bless disorder and we cannot be living in disorder.
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B
Well, it's true.
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A
Yeah. But. Okay, that was a little too intense. I mean, I've always been confrontational.
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B
Yes, we have been. And I've gotten so much better now. I was probably the other extreme. I just let people just.
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A
Just. Absolutely. I feel like you're really confrontational now in the best way.
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B
But not. You know, I wasn't before, back then. Before, I thought. Because I have, like, a very happy, like, two on the Enneagram. Just joy. I don't know. I just want to keep things easy.
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A
Erica Noel, you were always joyful. But also, I feel like we were such. I mean, it's beautiful now because too, I see this in both of our own marriage dynamics, too. But you were the grace to my truth, and I was the truth to your grace. And so we were like, a really good balance together. Yeah.
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B
And now I feel like we've both kind of come and we meet in the middle a little bit. So becoming a mom made me so much more confrontational now. I'm like, listen.
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A
Listen up.
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B
Let's talk about it.
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A
Yeah, let's talk.
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B
Because there's so much good that comes from it. From a good, healthy confrontation.
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A
Yeah.
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B
But, you know. Okay, so how did I respond when you said that?
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A
That's what I was remembering that part, I think. I think you guys were both like, no. Yeah. Like, we. We agree. Like, we. We need to be like, we need to work.
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B
You would, like. So my room was the, like, the only.
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A
You were the only one downstairs, so
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B
everyone had to use my bathroom.
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A
So that's fine with.
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B
I was fine with. Except I was like, well, you're gonna have to push through all the laundry to get there.
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A
The piles of clothes on the floor. Yeah. I still, like, I could walk you through every, like, square inch of. I still, like, remember. But it was the whole thing so special. It was so special.
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B
You would always host small groups early in the morning, and I would walk out, look in some type of Way to all the sweet girls.
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A
It's literally the best. I loved college. Like, college was such a sweet time. But I also look back and I'm like, in the same way that you were, like, kind of speaking to our 20 something self in the car that day. There are so many things that I would go back and tell myself. Like, I definitely cared so much about, like, being important and being in some type of, like, role and, like, being affirmed and validated by other people and. And I've just had to fight, like, against that spirit since then. Like, I feel like I've addressed it so much since then, but I feel like it was birthed then.
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B
Yes.
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A
And then I didn't recognize it till later. And I'm like, man, where did this come from? But it's so crazy. So you walked me. So you were there the whole time I was dating my ex and you walked me through that breakup. And I think, honestly, Erica, I think we broke up the day after your proposal. Or.
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B
No, a few days later. It was like.
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A
It was right after.
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B
Right after.
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A
That's crazy.
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B
Yes. Because I. I remember feeling. I knew you were so excited for me.
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A
Huh.
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B
But I remember feeling so bad because I'm like, it was like one extreme. And you'd had a lot of friends in that season.
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A
There was like, I think eight. I think I was in like, maybe eights high. It might have been like four or five, like, friends that were all getting engaged at the same time.
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B
And you were in every wedding and.
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A
And was all the weddings. But you were like my, like. So it really was, like, true. Just so much excitement and then simultaneously coupled with just, like, walking through my own, like, heartbreak. But that is so. It is so crazy to think back to that. And yeah, you just really. You really saw, like, that's that side of me of, like, being so sad, of walking through, like, a deep heartbreak, thinking that was going to be my person. And then now I'm like, quote, unquote, starting over.
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B
Yeah.
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A
And then, I mean, remember, because we got our first job together, but that we really worked, like, from home.
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B
Yep.
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A
And so that season of my life was so lonely because I was just like, at home all the time.
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B
Yeah.
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A
And I was like, I don't know. College was so easy for me in the friendship department.
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B
Well, everyone was like 10 minutes from each other.
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A
And in the same season of life.
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B
Exactly.
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A
But I graduated college and then it was like, okay. People moved and then, like, people started getting married. And I was like, what am I doing? My life. I'm like, fresh Off a breakup. It's just so wild. How. How would you say, like right after college, like that post college experience was for you in that early adulthood, like getting engaged, first job.
- [19:10]
B
Yeah.
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A
Entering into marriage. Like, was that season what you thought it was going to be and how did you handle that?
- [19:16]
B
Yeah, it was. It wasn't at all what I thought it was going to be. It was amazing. I think I remember when I got engaged, everybody. I don't know if you experienced this. I feel like you said you did. Everyone was just like, oh, just wait till that first year of marriage. Oh, man, it's a tough one. It's a doozy. And so I really tried to train my brain to be like, no, we're gonna go into this optimistic and speaking life over it. And yes, there's gonna be hard things. That's with literally anything good that you do. But we had the best first year of marriage. Like, it was so much fun.
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A
He's like, now year two.
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B
Well, I was gonna say now our. After we had Charlie Rose, which is our three year old now she's almost three and a half. That one.
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A
Yeah, that's.
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B
That one. That one was hard, but it was still beautiful.
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A
Yeah. Well, they do say, I think they say it's year one or year two, that typically there's some type of.
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B
Yeah, yeah.
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A
Really hard. Because I would say for us, the first six months of marriage was really hard.
- [20:19]
B
Yeah. Well, because you're just. You're bringing your extremes and then someone else's extremes. And it's your best friend in the entire world. You love him so much, but it's like when you have a roof over your head, you have to work things out. So.
- [20:32]
A
Yeah.
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B
That it was such a beautiful season. But I will say, and I know we've talked about this plenty and I mean, we've had to work through some stuff of just like expectations of friendships. Like, I remember, you know, I was married, you weren't.
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A
Yeah.
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B
And just the different, like, I was not showing up in the way that I needed to as a friend. But also you didn't understand marriage. Marriage. And so it was like no one I would say was wrong, but it was just like probably a lack of communication until we did.
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A
We sat down. Same with motherhood, like when you became a mom. Like, I just. It's so crazy. You really don't know until you know.
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B
Yep.
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A
And I remember, like when I first got married and those first six months were so hard, I was like, ain't nobody told me about this. I'm like, hold on. And then, but. And like, same for like, even like postpartum. I was like, man, this is crazy. But then I had like a whole new, like, understanding, unveiling grace, like appreciation for just like my friends who had walked through it. And. But like when you were in that season, like, I just didn't even know how to be. It's so true, like when you move through, especially when you're hitting those seasons at different times and then you add in long distance like that, that definitely. Well, and not to mention, I went on the Bachelor, so I did throw us a little, little bit of a phone loop.
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B
I loved it.
- [21:58]
A
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- [24:41]
B
Great.
- [24:41]
A
Wait, so what did you, what were your like actual real thoughts when I was like, hey, I'm going to go
- [24:47]
B
on the Bachelor, I honestly thought like you were pranking me, like the very right at first I was like looking for a camera.
- [24:53]
A
She's like, this is literally a. Just cuz it was so left field. Yeah, that.
- [24:59]
B
But the, I will say truthfully, like genuinely, the moment you explain, like if you were to hear the entire story of how it came to be, all of the like confirmations and signs the Lord gave you, like, I would have told you, you're probably disobeying the Lord if you decided not to just because it was so in your face, like, Maddie, this is the next step you're supposed to take. And so I had things I was nervous about for sure.
- [25:28]
A
Samesies.
- [25:28]
B
Yeah.
- [25:29]
A
Well, and I remember I told you and your mom, like I told you I think I'd only told my family and then you. And I was like, okay. I think she's like, I think she's gonna be like super supportive. She's gonna understand where I'm coming from. But it still was like a even myself. Like, I didn't, I was like, what am I doing? Like, this is crazy. This doesn't even make sense. But I just like you're saying I felt such peace. And I remember you were just, you were so supportive. You were like, hey, if this is what the Lord has called you to do, like, I got you, I'm with you, like, I'm covering you. And even every step of the way, like going to like, about to have to turn in my phone to not have it for two months. I'm like, texting you and your mom. I'm like, will y' all pray for me? Like, this is like, I'm about to step on into this and like, I have no idea what this is gonna look like. And truly, y', all, like, covered me that whole time. And I am so thankful because I'm not kidding. Like, I really do think that so many moments of just, like, me being able to. And I did not do that season perfectly by any means, but any strength that I had to just, like, stay true to, like, my faith and my convictions and what the word of God says, I truly think is just like the Holy Spirit and the prayers of my people. Yeah, I'm like, thank you, Lord Jesus, because you guys were praying and your mom is a prayer warrior.
- [26:43]
B
And listen, Mama D is praying for you.
- [26:47]
A
But I'm just so grateful because you've always been a friend where I'm like, I feel like I can come to you with anything. I'm like, okay, here's my worst day of my life. Here's my sin. Or here's this amazing, successful news story, like this thing that I gotta tell you about. And you're just such a cheerleader and prayer warrior, but also, yeah, just a supportive friend that no matter what I'm coming to you with, you're just like, all right, not what I expected, but I got you. But I love it. But I love it. What was it like? So seeing like on. Okay. Cuz we had our. We had the watch party. You came into town. I think you stayed with me the day before or something.
- [27:24]
B
Yes, I did. We got T shirts made randomly.
- [27:28]
A
My mom made some Team Maddie T shirts. I was so anxious and nervous. Could you tell I was so anxious?
- [27:34]
B
Yes. Do you remember, like, it was like everyone was about to come over for our little rose party and you were just. I think it's the. When I say the worst, I don't mean in a bad. But like, you were so overcome by, like, anxiety just because what you said could have been right and true, but they could have twisted anything. Like, that's how it.
- [27:55]
A
We had no idea works, you know?
- [27:57]
B
And so you were pretty much seeing it for the first time too. And I just remember we went to war just praying we did over you, just covering you in prayer. And the first thing came out and it was. It was weird.
- [28:11]
A
It was so weird.
- [28:12]
B
It was so weird. I remember mom came too, and she was sitting there. It was just I'm like. Because to me, you're Maddie. Like, not Maddie from the Bachelor. You're just Maddie, Maddie, Maddie in the best way.
- [28:25]
A
Like, you're just fine.
- [28:26]
B
But everyone was losing their minds because you're amazing. And I was like this. It just was so. It was like a kind of out of body experience. But I have never been. I've never been more proud of one of my friends. Like, just watching the way that. Because when you originally told me you were going on, you made this case of, like, this is what the Lord called me to do, and I'm gonna see it to completion. And so to. To see you in that moment and then to see you actively walking it out. And there's a lot of stories I may know that the world may never know of. Just like the deep, dark places that was your actual time there. There were great moments, but there were really, really hard ones too. And just to see you stay faithful to the assignment that the Lord sent you there for, it would have been so much easier, I think, so much easier to just give that up and follow the ways of the world. And what felt comfortable, what might have felt good in the moment, but I really have never been more inspired like, it was. Is so beautiful to get to watch you to do it.
- [29:33]
A
Well, thank you for saying that because it. It is actually crazy when I think back to that time and like, every week I was filled with so much anxiety, but I can remember that exact moment when you were in town and friends came over and the first episode was going live. Everyone was in their Team Maddie T shirts. And I felt so overcome with just, like, anxiety and stress. I had to, like, go remove myself and just, like, sit in the bathroom and just, like, try and calm down and breathe and pray and just be like, lord, I don't know what's happening. And all of a sudden, I mean, I'm just, like, looking at my phone and all of a sudden, like, I'm getting all these followers and all these mentions and all these people are talking about me, and I'm like, I don't know what is happening. This is like this. It feels out of body. Like, it. I just don't even think we were made for this. Like, like to experience this as human beings. It just is.
- [30:20]
B
It was a crazy experience.
- [30:22]
A
Especially go. I mean, going from, like, local church, like, foster parent recruiter, to like, now, like, sitting in a room with your best friends, watching yourself on this reality TV show with, like, people, like, tweeting about you.
- [30:34]
B
And what did that just feel like?
- [30:36]
A
It's really weird. It was super strange and I. And like to the point where I. Yes. I had to get up and like remove myself and be like. Yeah, this is like so weird.
- [30:44]
B
Was it weird like sitting in there like with. Because all of those friends, like we all were like team mad, I guess you could say, before the Bachelor. So like, was it a weird out of body experience sitting there with all of us? Like, did that almost make it more weird watching the.
- [31:00]
A
No, it. It brought me so much peace that you guys were okay with me.
- [31:03]
B
I. I wonder that it gave me
- [31:04]
A
so much peace that, that you were there. I think it was just like.
- [31:07]
B
It.
- [31:08]
A
The whole thing was just so weird and like I didn't know what was going to be portrayed and said. And then I also, I think just. Yeah. All these people like talking about. I don't know, it was just, it was so. It was so strange and at the time, like there was just kind of an uncertain ending in a way. Like, like Peter and I were kind of like in a weird like.
- [31:27]
B
Yeah.
- [31:28]
A
And so even the ending, so even just like watching the relationship with him play out like on the tv the whole. Literally from every dynamic. Yeah, it was just a very weird and interesting thing to like.
- [31:40]
B
I cannot even imagine.
- [31:41]
A
I couldn't, I like couldn't watch most of the episodes. I really didn't watch most of the episodes. And yeah, it just was a very strange feeling. But I remember like Erica, Erica's a real one because listen,
- [31:55]
B
she just, she's
- [31:56]
A
just been there through it all. I mean literally through like the filming. Because they take. Okay, so they take your phones. I don't have access to anyone. And so they take your phones like day one that you get there. So I don't have contact with my family, my friends. I don't have contact with anybody. And so I'm here in this environment, this crazy environment. A bunch of girls all fighting over the attention of one male and not, not a godly environment. No one really is like, you know, trying to seek holiness. And so it's a really. It's a crazy concept in and of itself. And so I'm just like trying to figure out this life and. And I have access to no one. And it's kind of like it gets these points where it's like tormenting. I mean, you kind of feel a little bit like you're in this like jail in a way of like, what am I doing? But I didn't feel like a piece to, to leave the show yet. And so it's just like, this wrestle, like, Lord, do I. Do I stay? Do I leave? I just, like, wish I could talk to someone. Yeah, see you guys this one time. I've never said this online ever. I don't think.
- [32:58]
B
Ever.
- [32:59]
A
I don't think I've actually ever told many people that. This one time. So you're not allowed. You can't have contact with anybody because you could get kicked off the show. And I got to a point where I didn't care. Kick me off the show. That is, kick me off the show. And we are to the point where we. I just had my hometown, but during hometowns, you are left in California. So, like, I. I was the first hometowns, I think, or one of the first. And then so we went and saw my family, and then they bring you back to California. And then I stay in California the rest of the week as he goes to the other hometown. So I'm just, like, in California all week, just me. And they have, like, one person assigned to you that kind of, like, looks after you. And anyways, like, me and my girl, we got close. We were like, whatever. But I just, like, I was hitting some moments of just, like, I was really in my head because I was like, I just had some of the best time with, like, the Bachelor, but then also, like, my dad didn't give his blessing, so I'm like, well, okay, so I can't say yes to an engagement. I'm just, like, in my head, and I'm like, how are the other hometowns going? What do I do? Do I say. Do I walk away? And I was like, well, I've got to contact my people. And so I. They don't. You don't get a home. You don't get a hotel key. Like, you don't get access to anything because you can't leave your room because you can't contact people, because you can't see other people. You can't. You're locked in a room, okay? And I'm literally locked in my hotel room. I'm like, I'm gonna go crazy. And so I don't even know how. I somehow made a trickery to get the hotel key. But I got. I got the hotel key. I sneak out of the room.
- [34:23]
B
This is the best.
- [34:24]
A
I sneak out, okay? And I think I was like, I want to go, like, work out. But, like, I can't remember how it worked out anyways, because the workout room was right next to the. The office. Like, in this hotel where they have, like, you know, in, like, hotels, they have computers. And whatever. And so I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go to the. I'm gonna go work out. Well, I go to the office and I find the computer and I log into my Gmail or my. My email. I'm, like, having flashbacks, and it's like, so late at night. And I. I log in and I immediately email you and my mom. And I'm like, guys, I don't know what to do. Like, please pray. I don't know if I should stay. I don't know if I should break up with him. Like, what do I do? Type thing like 91 1, ask God, tell me what I should do. And I was like, I don't know what else to do. And so anyways, I email that. Because it's email. Like, it's not like I'm getting a direct response immediately. So I'm like, all right, well, I guess I'm gonna go back up to my room. So go back to my room. And then the next day, I do the same thing. I come back down to the computer and I had an email from you guys. And I was like, oh, my gosh. I had this, like, all week long. This, like, back and forth exchange.
- [35:28]
B
It was insane.
- [35:28]
A
My mom didn't believe it was me. My mom thought that they were, like, trying to get tea out of her. So she, like, texts you.
- [35:34]
B
She called me at, like, 4am So I answered my phone. I'm like, hello? She's like, erica, check your email. So I'm like, okay. So I check it. She said, did she text you or did she email you? I was like, oh, my gosh. She did. She was like, delete it. Delete it.
- [35:48]
A
Now they can't trace anything.
- [35:50]
B
So I printed it because I was, sorry, Mama Pru. But then I deleted it. But I just had. I was like, if this is you, I just want to be able to remember, hold on to it and pray over the specific things. But, yeah, we didn't know. I mean, but then when you.
- [36:06]
A
No, my mom literally was like, who was your third grade teacher? I was like, mom, what am I getting a screener test? Like, she doesn't believe it's me. I'm like, this is coming from my Gmail. But she literally didn't believe it.
- [36:16]
B
Well, then there's me. And I'm like, okay, tell me everything.
- [36:19]
A
Spill everything. And I'm like, writing out novels. I'm like, this is the first time I've been able to engage with anyone that, like, knows my heart and cares about me. So it literally was I'm so thankful that I had that though, but that because that was like my therapy, my outlet, my. But also I think it, that's kind of what changed a little bit of it. Like I I headed into the next two weeks, I feel like I had a little bit more like clear mindedness, which is probably why they don't want you to contact anybody. Hey guys. This episode is brought to you by Glorify, the number one Christian daily devotional app. One thing I talk about a lot is how important it is to stay connected to God throughout your day. Life moves fast and it's so easy to get distracted, overwhelmed, or pulled into a million different directions. But when we intentionally make space for God, even in the smallest moments, it can completely shift our perspective and bring us back to what really matters. With Glorify, you can start your morning by reading the Bible passage of the day, diving into the daily devotional and finishing with an immersive experience called Daily Walk with God. And if you need a moment to reset in the middle of a busy day, this app is also offers guided meditations and curated worship playlists that help you slow down and refocus your heart on truth. Then at the end of the day you can wind down with sleep meditations designed to help your mind and heart rest in God's peace. Glorify is a really beautiful resource to have on your phone. So go ahead, download the Glorify app and create space for God in your every day. Whether you've been walking with Jesus for years or you're just starting to explore your faith, Glorify is the app for you. Listeners to the show can get full access to Glorify for just 29.99 for the entire year. That's Glorify's lowest price ever. When you download the Glorify app now@glorify-app.com staytrue feel closer to God this year with Glorify. Get full access all year for just 29.99 at glorify-app.com stay true that's glorified-app.com stay true stay true podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try it@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states because I had some more clear mindedness and just like people who knew me and I just so I'm such A firm believer in inviting in wise counsel. So come on. If I'm. I'm not letting. No, no, dude, that's right. On one knee and me saying yes if I don't invite in my wise counsel. And so that was, like, crucial for me. But, yeah, I'm pretty sure I would have gotten kicked off the show if they found out. And I think the girl literally walked down. Okay, this is the craziest part. This is the craziest part. I had just walked out of the office thing. Like, the door just shut, and the elevator's right here. Like, and the office is right here. And the gym is right here. The elevator thing opens as soon as I walked out. Thankfully, I'm in workout clothes and I'm standing right outside the workout room. So it looked like I. I just heard. Oh, but Lord, forgive me because I lied. But I needed that. I needed that. But, yeah, that's my. That's my crazy bachelor story that involves you that I've never told anybody before.
- [39:33]
B
Well, it's safe here.
- [39:34]
A
It's safe here with everybody else on the book.
- [39:37]
B
Everyone keep it a secret.
- [39:38]
A
Everyone keep it secret. Don't tell anyone. They may find me. I don't know. It's been enough years by now. It'll be fine. But, yeah, that. That was crazy. And then. Yeah. And then just the finale. And I mean, everything in between, it just is a really wild looking back then to where I am today and having no idea, like, I mean, just coming off the show, like, am I going to live in California? Like, what am I going to do? Anyways, that was a crazy time.
- [40:03]
B
It was wild.
- [40:04]
A
It was a really crazy time. And then, you know, life gets a lot better. And I meet Grant, and then you meet Grant. And you love Grant.
- [40:14]
B
I love G so much.
- [40:17]
A
He loves you and he loves your mom, your whole family.
- [40:20]
B
I love him. Him just, like, the most pure heart. I truthfully, like, I remember after meeting Grant, telling David, like, other than you, my love, I've never met, like, a man who's just so steadfast and in love with the Lord and, like, that is his entire sole purpose here on earth, which is what all of ours should be. Right? But, like, I don't think I'd ever seen somebody walk it out so faithfully and so unapologetically. He's just amazing.
- [40:50]
A
Yeah. And, like, so himself. Like, he's not trying to, like, be no. Anybody else or, like, anybody. He's just like, this is who I am. I. So that's what I so, like, loved about him just right off the bat. And then we got married and our wedding. Charlie Rose was eight weeks old. Six weeks old.
- [41:08]
B
Six weeks.
- [41:09]
A
Erica travels for my wedding.
- [41:10]
B
It was amazing.
- [41:11]
A
Her firstborn was six weeks old.
- [41:13]
B
It was incredible.
- [41:14]
A
That's a good bet. Best friend.
- [41:16]
B
Well, I was not gonna miss it. There was milk stains here, there and everywhere. But.
- [41:20]
A
Well, because. And at the time, again, I had no concept. I'm just like, this is so awesome. Like, so I'm so happy I get to meet my Charlie Rose now. I'm like, when I was six weeks postpartum, I'm like, how did Erica do that?
- [41:31]
B
Happily. We rented a van.
- [41:33]
A
Happily.
- [41:34]
B
No, it really. Truthfully, it. Honestly, it was not that bad, other than getting engorged, like, multiple times. But Christian and I, we were like. She was a little further than me, I think.
- [41:48]
A
Yeah, he. I think he was, like, six months.
- [41:50]
B
Okay. Yeah, he. But she was still nursing, so we were kind of on the same wavelength and helping each other out. But I remember when we were getting ready the morning of your wedding, David had to keep driving over to get more milk.
- [42:00]
A
Cause I was low.
- [42:02]
B
But it all worked out.
- [42:02]
A
But again, even now, I'm like. I understand that so much. Like, I've been in multiple weddings since having hosanna and figuring out the mathematics around that. I'm like, oh, I gotta pump here.
- [42:10]
B
I gotta feed here.
- [42:11]
A
I gotta. It's. It's so crazy.
- [42:12]
B
But it was worth it. And it was such a beautiful wedding. It was so. Honestly, the most fun ever. It was so fun.
- [42:20]
A
It was really, like, the time of my life. I think I also though I. If I could go back, I would have told myself to just be less stressed and just, like, be more. I was so, like, attentive to detail stress. And I'm like, Patty, just, like. Just be. Just hang out. The Type A, like, coming out in me. You know what I mean? Where it's like, I want all the details to go. And, like, that's where I wish I would have, like, gone back to, like, encourage myself to be a little more Type B and be like, just relax. Just have fun.
- [42:45]
B
Yeah.
- [42:45]
A
And I did. I had my moments. Like, I honestly think I even remember I was watching one of these videos the other day where it, like, actually really hit me was when we were getting ready, and I, like, come over to talk to you. And, you know. You guys know those friends that, like, when you, like, as soon as they, like, open up their mouth and say a word in a special moment, you just, like, break down and start crying. Erica has that effect on everyone. I remember we would walk into, like. Like, Target or something. I don't know. And I would, like, ask someone, like, how are you? Like, trying to be like, the hands and feet of Jesus, like, you know, trying to, like, encourage love, be joyful. They're like, great. And then Erica would be like, how are you? And immediately they break down, start bawling, crying, tell everything. They're like, will you pray for me, please? And I'm like, I just asked you that question, and you gave me nothing. So you have that effect on everyone. But you were like, I'm so excited. This is your wedding day. And I think that's all you said. And I literally just, like, stopped sobbing, and I just got my makeup done. I was like, wa.
- [43:40]
B
I remember that.
- [43:41]
A
I was like, I can't let my makeup get. No. It was so fun. Your wedding was so fun. We had the best time. We danced hard.
- [43:48]
B
We danced hard. We danced. It was so fun. You did so much. You were so helpful and just served me in every capacity. It was so sweet.
- [43:57]
A
I want to shift now. Talking a little bit about, like, foster care, adoption. Let's talk about. Okay, so you. You opened up a little bit about make it matter and why you started make it matter. I want to hear more of, like, what are some statistics around foster care and why do more people need to be made known about this.
- [44:20]
B
Yeah.
- [44:20]
A
Thing going on in the world? Because I think so often we kind of are, like, in our own little bubbles, and we don't really think about things that don't directly affect us, you know, and it's like, we're kind of just living our life, and it's like, yeah, sure, I'll, like, tie the. To church here and there. But, like, we're not a part of these things that. That really. The Bible calls us to 100. And so can you kind of give, like, some statistics around foster care?
- [44:41]
B
Yeah.
- [44:41]
A
And how it affects us and what we can all do to, like, be
- [44:45]
B
a part of 100. Yeah. And to be fair, I didn't know a lick about it either until we really got into our job at that local agency. And just my eyes were so open because I heard all the time, like, the system's so broken. The foster care system so broken. Child welfare system is so broken. And I was like, yeah, okay. Like, yeah, there's a lot of kids that are in it. No, like, the system as a whole is broken. And what. I mean, I literally cover it in prayer daily, just asking the Lord, because it. It will Take a miracle to fix what it is. Now, I'm not the one to say, like, something's too far gone, but if there was ever something I was to say it about, it would be the foster care crisis, because it is a crisis. And yeah, I just remember seeing kids that were. And I don't think you were still there when I was really witnessing everything that was going down. That was just so sad. But I mean, there were kids staying the night in our office in a sketchy area of town. They had no business staying there. It was not. It was not really safe for us to be there. But yeah, there we were because there was no place for them to go. There was no roof for. To go over their head. And so, yes, were we helping them get out of an unsafe situation? For sure, but we really weren't putting them in anything stable or consistent. Now, that wasn't all the time, but a lot of times that was the case. But I always go back to this foundational thought of, really, if you look back in history, where the crisis really got bigger was when the church stopped taking responsibility for these kids in care. When the idea of foster care was under the church, it was a lot better. But when the government took it over and not trying to throw shade on the government or get political about it, but listen, it was doing a lot better before. Now, I know there's a lot of. Of external factors that are contributing to this, you know, the opioid crisis, all of those different things. But really what it comes down to is we as believers have taken the mantle and the calling that the Lord has given us and handed it off intentionally, maybe unintentionally, maybe I don't know for you individually, but we've said, okay, the government is covering this, so we're good. And that's really where I. I look back and I see the biggest shift. And I'm a firm believer and in let's not put a band aid on things. Let's get to the root cause and the root issue. And so I've really taken the past five, six, seven years and just deep dived into all things foster care, looking at all the different aspects of it. And the area that the Lord always brings me back to is these sweet teenagers in foster care that are then getting ready to transition out. And I just remember time and time again, so I was. We both were foster parent recruiters. You focus more on the media side. I was more like the training side. But I remember training foster parents in time and time again, them always saying, like, okay, well, I'll take an infant. Or really, like a kid up to 5 years old is my max. 5 is kind of stretching it a little bit. And I never, I mean, I always was just like, okay, sure. But then I remember starting to put faces to the names of these teenagers that were sleeping in our offices because there was no place for them to go. They were in really unsafe situations or in very unhealthy group homes because there was no one that was going to take them. And realizing, okay, first of all, these kids, they didn't ask for their. Like, they didn't ask for these cards. These are just the ones that were handed to them. They didn't do anything to get here. Something did something. Somebody did something to them to get them in this position. And so, like, they're not bad kids now because of the trauma that they've experienced. And we saw firsthand high levels of trauma because we worked in a therapeutic foster care agency. So there were medically complex cases and then there were therapeutic kiddos who. That means they experienced really high levels of trauma, most of them sexual abuse, things of that nature. Horrific. And so because of that, they did have a lot of mental health issues that they were having to overcome. And a lot of families. And I understand it. I will say this, as a mom with two littles, I totally get why that could be a little overwhelming to invite that into your home, not knowing a kid's full story, because most of the time we don't know their full report of everything that happened to them. That comes with trust that you earn within that relationship. But I can see why parents wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable with that. But it doesn't take away the fact that these kids deserve a second chance too. These kids deserve a family. And honestly, love and a caring relationship can do, and of course, Jesus in all of that can do so much more than you could ever imagine. And it kind of takes the scariness of it away and just brings the reality of these are just kids too, and they may be functioning, or they may be an 18 or 19 year old, but they're functioning because of their trauma that they experienced as a 13 or 14 year old at no fault of their own. So it's just been so eye opening. There's 20,000 kids that age out every single year of foster care. And I always tell people, you know, maybe you don't feel passionate about foster care, maybe you don't feel passionate about adoption, but do you feel passionate about human trafficking? Do you feel passionate about homelessness? Do you Feel passionate about incarceration rates or teen pregnancies X, Y and Z, the list goes on. If you are passionate about any of those things, then you need to be passionate about foster care because majority of all of those victims were in the foster care system and they aged out. And we're looking for anybody to trust anybody that would give them a roof over their head. So many kids end up in human trafficking because they find somebody that looks safe, that is going to give them money and they say, okay, well this has to be better than my current situation.
- [51:17]
A
Yeah. Oh, and what is the like, is this a problem that's just growing and increasing? Like, would you say that the foster care system, even when we were working together in what that was 2019, 2018, is it just continuing to grow more and more?
- [51:34]
B
It is because we're not getting to the root issue. Now. I will say for the first time since I've been in all of this, I am seeing initiatives happen. I'm seeing the government actually do a few things, especially under this administration. I know they are very passionate about foster care. So there is things that are being done, but it can only do so much. Right. We have so many kids in care.
- [52:00]
A
Yeah.
- [52:01]
B
And so that is where I just, I mean, I feel like the Lord has commissioned me this year and going into next year just to get as loud as possible about it and invite people along and give them tangible things. Because not everyone does feel called to be foster parents. That is okay. Do not do it if you do not feel called to it because it's not easy.
- [52:20]
A
Yeah, totally.
- [52:20]
B
It's not easy. But. But there is absolutely a way that you can be a part and make an impact within this population. Whether it's by serving other foster families, bringing them a meal, helping them with practical resources, just being a listening ear, or with all of the incredible non profits around that are doing things that they're being the hand and feet of Jesus, stepping in and serving. Whether it's volunteering, donating, praying, there's just so many ways to be involved. And the Lord literally calls us to in his word.
- [52:52]
A
Amen. So facts so true. And so that's where it's like when people say it's a calling, it's like, but we're all called to it, everybody. It's just a matter of like, what is your specific role? Which I love that you touched on that. And yeah, I'd love to hear like, what is it about make it matter. You kind of touch on a little bit that just like sets it apart. And like, what is the goal and the vision of make it Matter and what it is a way that like stay true can come alongside of make it matter and those listening to help support, like what God's laid on your heart for those aging out of foster care.
- [53:27]
B
Yeah, absolutely. So I remember when I started make it Matter about four years ago, just looking at statistics and looking at different reports and studies and literally every single study, when it talked about the healing work and like kids having a good turnout when they actually age out of foster care, every single one of them said it had to do with one caring adult in their life. And I just was like, oh my word, we're not reinventing the wheel here. Like, this is basic stuff. They need love from a caring adult. They need consistency. And unfortunately, and I'm not speaking for all foster families, please don't come at me. I love you guys so much. You're doing the Lord's work, but there are families that aren't doing it for the right reasons necessarily.
- [54:17]
A
Well, and that was part of the hard thing of when we were working. There would just be situations where you're supposed to like sign off on certain foster families that you're like, I, as a Christian don't feel a piece about signing off and putting this child who's vulnerable, who's been through trauma, into another traumatic, not God designed situation. That it's just, it's a hard. And that's what you're saying about it being under the covering of the government instead of the church. Church. There's just certain things within the government that it's going to be wildly different than it being.
- [54:45]
B
Because at the end of the day, and I'm not going to say any details but like it is a business. And so I don't know if you remember this, but at the end of each month we had a quota of how many foster homes we had to open. And I can't tell you how many times I thought I was going to get laid off or get fired because I was like, nope, not, not going to hit that because I do not feel comfortable with that family, that family or that family if I would not put my child in there. I'm not opening this home for you to put this child in there because there are kids too. And so I, I really carried the weight of that and they never fired me. I ended up stepping away. But yeah, I mean, it is a business and they are trying to hit certain numbers so they can make certain amounts of money and all the different things. But, but yeah, What I was saying is just like this idea of a caring adult, really what the Lord laid on my heart for make it Matter was, again, let's not try to reinvent the wheel here. Let's look at it from a biblical standpoint. And so we originally, when we started, I wanted to connect with the kids when they turned about 16, 17 years old, build relationship with them that way. Then when they were transitioning out of foster care at 19 in the state of Alabama, we would be able to help them transition successfully. So again, I'll go into detail in a little bit, but we are building this apartment complex to house these kids,
- [56:12]
A
which looks epic, by the way.
- [56:14]
B
So excited, so excited. But that was kind of my idea there. We're gonna have life skills training, we're gonna have mentors, all these things, which is so huge. Huge, huge. So, so necessary. But honestly, as we continue to develop the program and really be hands on with all of it, we realized we were missing so many teens because they were already running away by 16. Wow. So a lot of people don't know this, but when a teenager in foster care runs away, like, the state cannot run after them and chase them. They can tell the law enforcement, like, they went this way, but that's about it for liability purposes. And so, so many kids, teenagers specifically, feel like, I have no hope, I have no, like, future here. This feels horrible in foster care. So I think I would rather just run and try to do it on my own. And so I really felt like the Holy Spirit just said to us, nope, you're going to start at age 13. And so we're partnering with local school systems to come in and meet with these kids starting at age 13. We're calling the program the Collective. We want it to feel very something that they're proud to be a part of. Something that isn't like, like, oh, I'm in this program because I'm in foster care, but like, oh, no, I'm a part of the collective. And so we have fun merch for them, all the things. But from ages 13 to 15, we are only focused on building relationships, showing up for their football games, showing up for their dance recitals, whatever it is that they're doing, just being a steady presence. That way, if they're moving from foster home to foster home to foster home, they still have one caring adult that's connected, connected with them, that's checking in on them. When we met with one of the principals, they said, we are always terrified and praying for these kids starting at 3pm to 7am because we can care for them while in the, while they're in school. But the moment that they leave, we don't know if they're fed, we don't know if they're going to show back up at 7am the next day. And for so many of those kids, they don't because they run. And so 13 to 15 years old, that's totally what we're focused on. But then from 16 up to 19, we're really honing in on life skills. So we're talking about budgeting, we're talking about, you know, how to take care of your home, how to have good, healthy relationships, how to self regulate, how to be able to have conversations about your mental health so that you prevent those issues from happening in the future and really create a pathway for them of success. So many of these kids, I'm, I'm very passionate about creative things. I know we kind of touched on that earlier on, but there is something so powerful and so therapeutic about using your hands. Yeah. That will open up a conversation. So the amount of times if I'm trying to get my husband to talk about something hard, I'm like, let's go work in the yard. Because it's like when he's working.
- [59:15]
A
No, that's, that's so true with his hands. Especially for the male brain, they like almost have to be doing something like even like not even having eye contact. Yes. It's like, let me like plant something while we're having this like deep. It's so true.
- [59:29]
B
It's true. Or he has a motorcycle. We'll work on this. We. He works on his motorcycle. I sit there and just eat popcorn or something and talk. But, but giving them a space to do that with their mentor there, where they're building that connection, trying out things that maybe they never thought that they would have the opportunity to try. And then it turns out that they're actually super interested in it and want to pursue that for their future.
- [59:55]
A
So is this a schooling? Is school attached to the make it matter. Okay.
- [59:59]
B
Or, or do they.
- [60:00]
A
So they don't go separate to school and then come back?
- [60:02]
B
No, we are going into the school system. So I'm very big on. Let's meet them where they're at that establish that connection, establish that relationship. Once they're comfortable, then we can step away and like have them come join us with certain outings and things like that. But it does start in the school system. And then our goal is. So we're starting in January of 2026. I'm so excited. That's the first pilot program of the mentorship and we're starting with 13 year olds. And so our prayer is, obviously, by the time they're done, we have this apartment complex for them to transition into. And we have been actively working with some youth who were. Well, actually young adults who were homeless that they had aged out of foster care, had nowhere to go. We got a crisis phone call saying, this kid's on the streets. They're not gonna, they're not gonna survive on the streets. What can you do? And so we didn't have the apartment complex, but we were like, we'll make it work. We'll figure something out. And one thing that has proven true time and time again is that piece of it is absolutely vital because with the apartment complex, there is community with people who have experienced similar, similar situations as you have. And so I can sit and talk to him blue in the face to one of these young adults saying, we're here for you, we love you. You can do this. But I've not walked in their shoes.
- [61:24]
A
They're like, you don't get it.
- [61:25]
B
Yeah. They're like, look at you. You have no idea. You had an amazing family that raised you and is still here supporting you. I don't have that. And so. So it's such a vital piece. Especially. We are very big on accountability. We're very big. We can't talk about Jesus in the school systems, so we're just going to show him with our actions. But once they're in the apartment complex. Oh, absolutely.
- [61:49]
A
So they're talking all about the.
- [61:51]
B
We're.
- [61:51]
A
Yep.
- [61:52]
B
Till you're, till you're blue in the face. We're going to talk to you about it. Because there is nothing that can change their heart and break that generational cycle of child welfare involvement unless Jesus is a part of it. I'm just absolutely firm in that belief. And so you have a question about your identity. Are you confused about who you are? Most of these kids are, yeah. Jesus is your answer to that. He is where you find clarity. He is where you find purpose. And I can steer you in any different direction all day long. But at the end of the day, if you don't know who created you and what he created you to do, then you are going to feel lost and you are going to feel confused. So that's really where we want to come alongside of these kids. And again, you know, we do want to take care of their basic needs. And that's kind of where that band aid comes on, and we're putting band aids on those things. But we are getting to the root issue of you have to know by the end of this who you are and whose you are, and everything else will flow from that.
- [62:54]
A
Amen. So good. So good. So are the mentors. Would the mentors be living in the apartment complex or, like, would soon be.
- [63:01]
B
Yeah. So we will have, like, I hate to say house parents. That sounds kind of cheesy and lame, but. Yeah, kind of sorta. But they. I mean, these are gonna be adults, so they will have, obviously, a ton of security system. We do. I don't know if I've mentioned this yet. We have land secured, so we're so excited about that.
- [63:20]
A
And. And it's in the perfect location.
- [63:22]
B
Yes, it's in Owens Crossroads. I can't say all the details, but it's amazing. Very retreat life.
- [63:29]
A
And this is in Huntsville.
- [63:30]
B
In Huntsville. But we want to get this figured out, get the blueprints in place and then be able to replicate. Because, yes, this is a really big issue in Alabama, but it's also a massive issue everywhere. And so I. I truly believe it's going to work. I have no reason to not believe that. Not going to be easy. But we're. We're so excited.
- [63:55]
A
But only God. Only God can do it. Only God will do it. How can we be a part? Like what? For those listening, how can they be a part? Of course, prayer. But what are some, like, practical next steps of just like everything you're talking about, There's a tug on their hearts, listening. There is a voice, voice in their heads, like, you need to be a part of this. You need to be giving to this. You need to be serving in this way. What is it that they can tangibly, like, next step that they can take?
- [64:22]
B
Yeah, absolutely. So, number one, like you said prayer, like, please cover us in prayer. I can't even. I'm not going to go into all the details, but spiritual warfare is real.
- [64:32]
A
Yeah.
- [64:32]
B
And the amount of spiritual warfare as we are getting closer and closer and closer, it's. I don't ever want to give the enemy credit for a thing because our God is so bigger, so much bigger than that, but, like, it is real. And so just cover our family, our team, this overall vision, all of these young adults in prayer, spread the word. Not just about make it matter, but just about this epidemic in general. Like, this is happening everywhere. These kids, I'm sure wherever you're listening, they need support from you too. So look and see if there's any Local nonprofits in the area that are making an impact and come alongside of them and support them, volunteer, donate, whatever it may be. And then for us specifically, we have a big chunk of change we are working to raise. We're 1.5 million into it, so we have $6 million left to raise. And so anything helps that is going to cover operational costs for the first five years. So we will be fully funded to operate the complex for five years. That's going to cover the actual building of it, furnishing of it, and then actually taking care of these young adults and giving them. Not enabling them, but giving them footing to stand on so that they can continue to succeed. Need.
- [65:45]
A
Gosh, and you do such an amazing job. I was just recently in Huntsville or I don't know when this was, like, a year ago, and one of the young adults that you guys were just helping and serving just the way that you, like God has just given you such radical grace. Like, this truly is like, your calling and what you were created to do and just the way that you love and serve. Like, I left and I. I called Grant and I was like, I'm truly so inspired by Erica's life. Like, I'm so inspired. There are a lot of things that. That I'm kind of like, okay, yeah, is this what I'm supposed to be doing? Does this please God? Is this like my. You know, and asking those questions? And I'm like, man, but when I read scripture and James one talks about, like, what pleases God? What is God's will for your life? To look after the orphans and the widows and to take care of those who can't take care of themselves, to be a voice for the voiceless, to fight for those people. And you do such a beautiful job at that, while also, like, loving your family and loving your littles so well and, and loving David so well and so. So you've inspired me. And I've been so, like, a part of the. Make it matter since the beginning. And I've just, like, watched you just be so faithful to that call. And it hasn't been easy. And there has been warfare, there has been obstacles, there's been pushback. But you've been faithful to what God's called you to do. And, And, And. And every single person is called to be a part of it. And my hope and ask of you is to ask the Holy Spirit, like, what is my role in this? How can I help, Help be a part of this? I would ask all of you to pray, to pray for those who are being taken advantage of, to pray for those who are vulnerable, to pray for those who. Who feel like they don't have a voice or don't have a place, or to pray for those in the foster care system. To pray that this would come back under the covering of the church. To pray for make it Matter. To pray that these funds would be raised, this apartment would be builded, and, and that there would be able to be that we could home at Make It Matter. These, these kids who, like, are going to, like you said, like, most likely end up sadly on the streets or in jail or, you know, unfortunately dead. I mean, there's just really sad situations of what often happens coming out of the foster care system. And so I'm so thankful for your heart and I'm so thankful for Make It Matter and just want to encourage all of you guys to just ask the Holy Spirit and we're going to include also a link in the show. Notes, notes. If you feel led to donate, if, if that feels like what the Holy Spirit is prompting you to do right now, you know, that could be $10. That could be $10,000. That could be whatever God lays on your heart, whatever you feel like he lays on your heart. But this is, this is what we're called to do as a church and, and to, to take care of those who can't take care of themselves. And so just want to encourage you guys to take that step of faith and so thankful for your friendship, for your testimony, for the gifts of how you just. And, and it truly, like, impacts me and I hope everyone listening of, like, I love that it's called make it Matter because our lives do matter. Like, our lives on this earth matter. And we're not living just for this life. We're living for the life to come, for an eternal one. But how we live this life matters because it has an impact on our eternity.
- [68:48]
B
Yeah.
- [68:49]
A
And on those who, like, you know, of course, your biggest hope and prayer is that. That, you know, that these kids all make it to heaven, that you're giving them. Like you said, like, most importantly, like, yes, we're going to take care of your physical needs, but we're also going to meet you spiritually because that's the biggest.
- [69:04]
B
Well, and I think, like, I just think we sometimes overthink it so much. Like, don't overthink it. Like, look at scripture.
- [69:13]
A
Yeah.
- [69:13]
B
We are called to love the orphans and widows. We are called to love our neighbor. It's really that simple. You don't have to have, have it's amazing when you have a big platform to do that. I do not. You know, and. But guess what? I get to be the hands and feet of Jesus to my neighbors, just like you get to too. We need both.
- [69:33]
A
Erica's famous in Huntsville because anytime I talk about her flower shop with anybody in Birmingham or like Tennessee or Huntsville area, they're like noellas. I love Noellas. So shout out to Noella's because it's the cutest.
- [69:46]
B
Hey, I can say this now cuz this is airing like we are moving.
- [69:51]
A
What? Where?
- [69:52]
B
Have I not told you this? No, we are moving to Jones Valley, which is. It's going to be great.
- [69:58]
A
But wait, this is exciting.
- [69:59]
B
I know. It's going to be like twice the
- [70:01]
A
size and I just want your second location to open up here in time.
- [70:05]
B
In time. In time.
- [70:07]
A
Like Monster.
- [70:07]
B
Maybe not, but that. That will employ some of the youth in our program. So that's a huge piece of it too.
- [70:12]
A
Well, praise Jesus. This. Well, guys, this has been, I don't know, maybe my favorite episode ever because literally my best friend coming on the podcast has been so much fun. But I'm so thankful for you and like I said, I'm going to include all of the links and the stuff in the show. Notes of how you can follow Erica, make it matter. Noella's all the things and the links to. To donate, to give, to serve in the ways that you feel led to. But so grateful for you guys. And Erica would like to say go and make today matter. Go and make your life matter. In Jesus name as always guys. Be sure to stay you and stay true. We love you. Stay True. Podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try it@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.