Questions Girls Are Afraid to Ask in Relationships ft. Grant Troutt

Summary

Stay True with Madison Prewett Troutt

Episode: Questions Girls Are Afraid to Ask in Relationships ft. Grant Troutt
Date: February 16, 2026
Host: Madison Prewett Troutt
Guest: Grant Troutt

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Episode Overview

In this heartfelt and lively episode, Madison Prewett Troutt is joined by her husband, Grant Troutt, for a candid Q&A tackling "Questions Girls Are Afraid to Ask in Relationships." Drawing from their own love story and faith-based perspectives, the couple unpacks the male and female experience in modern dating—everything from timing and rejection to attraction and the importance of clarity. Their signature humor, vulnerability, and Christian worldview shape this episode into both a personal narrative and a practical guide for navigating relationships while staying true to your values.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Madison & Grant’s Relationship Backstory (03:29 – 18:25)

• Different Dating Histories: Madison describes herself as having more dating experience, including time on The Bachelor, while Grant had only one serious girlfriend before her.

  • "I would say, for me, it was like, I idolized relationships and marriage way too much." — Madison [05:59]
  • "You didn't really date...since becoming a Christian." — Madison [04:42]

• Initial Connection & Missed Opportunities: The pair recount their multiple "almost" meetings—at church, through friends, and via their mothers—before finally being set up on a blind date.

  • "God is just hiding me away, tucking me away, preparing me for my wife. Anybody that feels overlooked or hidden or unseen, God sees you." — Grant [12:21]

• First Date Nerves & Authenticity: Both were nervous; they recorded selfie videos before their first date, later sharing them during engagement.

  • "If this goes well, I hope you show her one day." — Grant, about his video message [17:50]

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2. Why Do Guys Take So Long to Make the First Move? (19:54 – 24:48)

• Seasons & Readiness: Grant emphasizes the importance of knowing your season and calling in God before pursuing someone.

  • "Season is everything. I would start there. I would say, like, for Christians who are in a season of, typically, the Lord can define your season." — Grant [20:17]

• Fear of Rejection: The main reason men hesitate is the vulnerability and risk of rejection.

  • "You're putting almost your value in their hands for a second to go, are you worth it or not to me, to even go out on a date. That is so vulnerable." — Grant [21:31]

• Influence of Friends: Healthy, godly friendships can encourage clarity and courage in pursuing relationships.

  • "Guys will huddle up and be like, bro, just do it...and that's like the best story when you know your season, know your identity, and you just go do it." — Grant [24:37]

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3. Clarity vs. Playing It Cool: Modern Dating Dynamics (26:00 – 29:17)

• Clarity Over Games: The couple discusses the confusion that comes from unclear intentions.

  • "Everything in culture, movies, music, whatever we're in taking is everything but clarity...It's anti-godly." — Grant [28:25]
  • "Why do you think so many guys don't lead with clarity?" — Madison [27:42]

• The Bible & Dating: They observe the gap in biblical teaching on modern dating.

  • "The Bible doesn't talk about dating. So I think that also is hard because you have this single life addressed and you have this married life addressed..." — Madison [28:27]
  • "There's got to be like a book of the Bible that didn't make it. Paul's like, I had a dating one, but like I just didn't think it would make it. We're like, dang it, Paul." — Grant [28:51]

• Spiritual Guidance: Prayer and community can help guide dating decisions, even when scripture isn’t explicit.

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4. What Non-Physical Qualities Attract Guys? (32:00 – 36:34)

• Character, Kindness, and Confidence: Grant lists character, respectful treatment of others, and confidence as most attractive.

  • "How do you respect people that can do nothing for you?...That stuff really, really, really matters." — Grant [32:22]
  • "Confidence is the most attractive thing—that before you know who you're dating, you know who you are." — Grant [34:05]
  • "Truly confident people, you don't need to tear other people down to feel better about yourself." — Madison [34:51]

• Turn-Offs: Insecurity (if it becomes the whole personality), tearing down others, or seeking constant affirmation.

• Visual Attraction Still Matters: Acknowledges initial male attraction is often visual, but emphasizes character is what sustains interest.

  • "Guys are visual...That's how it is. Like, are you the type that God made me attracted to?...But then very quickly, it's like, okay, now let me get to know you." — Grant [38:24]

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5. Spiritual Maturity as a Foundation (39:11 – 40:47)

• A person’s relationship with Jesus is their most important quality.
  • "You do have to talk about how important it is of where they are spiritually. That’s obviously the most important." — Madison [39:11]

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6. First Dates: Depth, Fun, and Immediate Impressions (39:20 – 44:14)

• Mixing Depth & Lightness: Their own first date mixed sharing testimonies (deep) with music and playful moments (fun).

  • "What I loved about our first date is that it was the perfect blend of fun and deep." — Madison [39:23]

• How Soon Do You Know? Most people sense compatibility early, but sometimes it takes a few dates.

  • "How quickly on the first date do you know...should you, obviously, finish the date cordially?" — Grant [42:35]

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7. Vulnerability and Follow-Up After a Disappointing Date (44:14 – 46:14)

• Overcoming Anxiety: Grant shares he became anxious and shut down on their second date, but later owned it and clarified his interest.

  • "I just like, kind of shut down. I just…felt like I couldn't be me. And I was dealing with so much anxiety." — Grant [45:18]

• Vulnerability Breeds Connection: Madison appreciated Grant’s honesty and seeing “strength and confidence modeled in this way.”

  • "Vulnerability breeds vulnerability...I loved that you showed kind of a...like, I don't want to say weak...but you were just, like, vulnerable about something that you were struggling with." — Madison [44:52]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "God is just hiding me away, tucking me away, preparing me for my wife. Anybody that feels overlooked or hidden or unseen, God sees you." — Grant [12:21]
• "Everything in culture, movies, music, whatever we’re in taking is everything but clarity...it’s anti-godly." — Grant [28:25]
• "Confidence is the most attractive thing—that before you know who you’re dating, you know who you are." — Grant [34:05]
• "Truly confident people, you don't need to tear other people down to feel better about yourself." — Madison [34:51]
• "Vulnerability breeds vulnerability." — Madison [44:19]
• "Take the shot." — Grant [31:55] (on taking the risk to ask someone out)

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Important Timestamps

• 03:29 – 18:25: Madison & Grant’s serendipitous journey to meeting each other
• 19:54 – 24:48: Why it takes guys so long to make a move and overcoming rejection
• 27:42 – 29:17: The importance of clarity in relationships vs. games and unclear intentions
• 32:00 – 36:34: Non-physical traits that attract guys and the power of confidence/character
• 39:20 – 40:47: Mixing depth and fun on a first date; the role of spiritual maturity
• 42:35 – 44:14: How quickly you know something’s there (or not) on a first date
• 44:14 – 46:14: Grant’s vulnerable sharing after a tough date and how it built trust

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Conclusion

The episode blends personal storytelling and actionable insight, offering a vulnerable look inside Madison and Grant’s courtship while tackling universal dating questions. They encourage a faith-driven approach to relationships, advocating for clarity, godly community, confidence, vulnerability, and staying true to one’s values.

Stay tuned for part two, where the conversation continues with even more questions from listeners and each other.

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For anyone navigating dating, searching for real advice, or wanting to hear an authentic love story infused with faith and humor, this episode is rich with both practical wisdom and memorable moments.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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50 off regular price for new customers. Upfront payment required 45 for 3 months, $90 for 6 months or 180 for 12 month plan taxes and fees. Extra speeds may slow after 50 gigabytes per month when network is busy See terms. What are some qualities non physical that guys find attractive in a girl?

[B]

Everything in culture, movies, music, whatever we're in Taking is everything but clarity.

[A]

It's anti godly. What takes a guy so long to make the first move?

[B]

I think you can tell a lot about somebody on how they treat everybody.

[A]

Why do you think that so many guys don't lead with clarity?

[B]

You're putting almost your value in their hands for a second to go. Are you worth it or not to me to even go out on a date? Do you know who you are with or without me?

[A]

Confidence is attractive. The Bible doesn't talk about dating.

[B]

There's got to be like a book of the Bible that didn't make it. Paul's like, I had a dating one but like I just didn't think it would make it. We're like, dang it, Paul.

[A]

What's up guys? Welcome back to another episode of Stay True podcast. I'm your host, Madison Pruitt Trout and I have my handsome, amazing, one of a kind, best husband in the whole world.

[B]

Really good to be here.

[A]

Grandra.

[B]

You look amazing in green. I really like you in green.

[A]

Thank you. Does it make my eyes more green?

[B]

I was going to say that it.

[A]

Makes them pop because they're typically blue. Yeah, yeah, Little turquoise, but it makes. Oh, turquoise. Wait, turquoise is blue?

[B]

Well, it's greenish blue, right?

[A]

Or light blue. I don't know. But guys, we're recording this episode with the flu. I literally have the flu right now and we're not feeling our best. But you know, life still goes on. The work must continue. The show must continue.

[B]

The show must go on.

[A]

The show. That's, I think, what I was trying to say.

[B]

I can hear it in your voice for sure.

[A]

Okay, well, thank you, but.

[B]

But it's great.

[A]

Okay. Wait, what are we talking about today, though?

[B]

Well, first off, our sweet Hosanna is so sick, too.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

That makes us so.

[A]

Okay. But honestly, it's the worst when your baby is sick. I would rather be sick times 100 than watch her be sick at all.

[B]

It's the worst. And she's the most cuddly ever.

[A]

Yeah, she's really clingy to me.

[B]

Yeah, she does need mama right now. But her little nose. And she hates when you try.

[A]

And, yeah, she doesn't. Like, she'll, like, yank her head away when you try to.

[B]

Like, you got to figure out you fake this way, and she'll turn this way. But she's getting better. I think the first fever was a little scary. It was her first fever.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it was so scary.

[A]

I was, like, crying. Yeah, it was really sad. But, yeah, we're on the up and up.

[B]

I think so.

[A]

We're on the up and up.

[B]

I really think so.

[A]

The show must go on. And so we're going to be talking all about dating, flirting.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

What else? I don't know. Relationships.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Single. I mean, we're just probably going hit every little dynamic. This is really like a Q and A form. I have so many questions that you guys have submitted, and also a lot that I've taken from single friends, dating friends, and gotten their perspective as well. And so we're going to be just answering some questions.

[B]

But I thought it's been a minute since we did this. It has been a minute dove into the dating, and I thought it'd be.

[A]

Really fun for, like, me to ask you some questions. And I don't know, maybe we do all one episode. Maybe this is like a part one, part two situation. I guess we'll see how long it takes. But you ask me questions. I ask you questions.

[B]

Yeah. I love.

[A]

And I ask you about what? Wait, I asked you what guys. No, about what girls. You guys. My brain's not working. Okay. Yeah. Okay. I ask you what girls need to know. No, what guys? Girls want to know about guys.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I don't know if I said that. Right.

[B]

And then I'll ask you what guys want to know about girls.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Right. Guys and girls. Why is that so difficult? We talked about this before we press.

[A]

Record, guys, I think. But my brain is, like, not working this morning, so But I'm excited. And thinking back to, like, us dating. And so you and I have very different dating experiences, like, before we met each other.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Because you didn't really date.

[B]

Well, like, since becoming a Christian.

[A]

Yeah. But you only have, like, one girlfriend.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No shame in that.

[B]

I'm just saying she just took a shot, like.

[A]

No, that's good.

[B]

You had, like, one girlfriend. All right.

[A]

Okay. But I had a lot of. A lot of relationships.

[B]

How many boyfriends have you had?

[A]

Okay. Serious boyfriends. One.

[B]

When she starts. When you start counting on the hand.

[A]

No, I would say. I would say two. And then if you count the bachelor. Three. I guess. One was public.

[B]

You gotta count the bachelor.

[A]

Yeah. One was public. Three. And then you.

[B]

Okay. All right. That's not that bad.

[A]

That's not that bad. But I've gone on dates.

[B]

Okay. Yeah.

[A]

And been in, like, the talking stage. The talking stage. Do you remember the talking stage?

[B]

It's a good yet scary stage.

[A]

It's terrifying.

[B]

Yeah. It's vulnerable.

[A]

Yeah. It's like, where are we going? What are we. How do you feel about me? How do I feel about you? It's very evaluation stage. But we do have different backgrounds in that way. And, like, I would just say, yeah, like, we dated differently. Your only relationship was, like, you weren't following Jesus. And so I would just say that relationship went very differently. I would say, for me, it was like, I idolized relationships and marriage, like, way too much. Like, I just didn't.

[B]

What does that mean?

[A]

I love to flirt. You and I both got voted biggest.

[B]

Flirt, like, in the high school yearbook.

[A]

But here was my problem.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

Here was my. I'll confess.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Is like, I was faithfully. Like, I loved Jesus.

[B]

See, that's where this gets a little weird. That's where I've got the. Like, I didn't know better. You, like, were. Didn't you also get, like, most spiritual or something? That is the most dangerous combo I've ever heard.

[A]

Alert and best Christian example.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. That is ridiculous.

[A]

I don't know. Why.

[B]

Why would you. So you were, like, leading the Bible study, but, like, staring at their eyes while you taught them Romans? What was that duo like?

[A]

No, I was evangelizing on my high school campus.

[B]

While you were just, like, biting your lip as you told them about the Romans row?

[A]

No, I mean, I don't know. I really was. I. Okay. I was the girl who. I'll be honest, I had a lot of guy friends because I struggled with girlfriends. I did.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Like. Like, my friend, like, I ended up. I would say, junior and senior year of high school, I found really amazing, like, girlfriends love that. But I would say before that, I really struggled with finding, like, solid.

[B]

So you hung with the dudes.

[A]

So I had a lot of guy friends.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So I was like, the girl who played basketball and, like, had the guy friends. And, you know, I'm a physical touch person. And so I would say, like, this.

[B]

Episode is just wrenching my heart out as we.

[A]

Every second, you and I both had to get sanctified in that.

[B]

Listen.

[A]

Because your love language is also physical touch.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so, like.

[B]

And I wasn't following Jesus, by the way. This girl got loaded business.

[A]

This is when we were dating, and I had to say, like, I was like, hey, we can't just, like, be, like, touching Pete. Like. Like side hugs. You know what I mean? Like, side hugs only.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I. We had to have that conversation all over me. I did.

[B]

And it's just a friendly thing that I've.

[A]

Yeah, no, you're friend. You're just a friendly person. Okay. So anyways, our dating experience, so. But then we meet each other because we get set up on a blind date.

[B]

Yeah. Blind date. But before that. Can we go before that?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You take it where you want to go.

[B]

You go on this little show called the Bachelor, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Public show. I didn't watch a second of it. Didn't know who you were at all. I'm working. I'm interning at Watermark Church, so single God is sanctifying me. I'm becoming a man of God. Tuesday night, you just moved to Dallas.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You walk in the porch, and I remember. I don't know what it was about you. You carried some swag that night that, like, the whole room just, like, looked at you. And I was wearing my little intern lanyard that said Grant and it said the porch. And I was just, like, becoming a man of God. And I just had a really hard conversation about being too flirty. Like, wow. Yeah. I mean, I was being friendly.

[A]

I thought I wasn't the first one to call you out.

[B]

And dudes were like, bro, what are you doing? You can't, like. And I. So I was in this zone of, like, okay, no, like, blinders on. Become a man of God. And you walk in, and I'm just like, who is this black and white panda dunks on tight jeans. Not too tight, but tight.

[A]

I'm like, wow, tight jeans.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, just like, the fitted jeans. Little rip.

[A]

I can't.

[B]

And I literally looked at Our boy who ended up setting us up six months later. I was like, yo, who was that? He's like, oh, bro, she was on the show, like, the Bachelor. Like, don't. Don't. Nah. And I was like, well, all I know is whoever my wife is, I want her to be. And look like that literally said those words. Okay, don't see you. Talk to you. Six months. Go. Go by.

[A]

Well, and there was. Remember, there was that night you were at dinner with some guy friends.

[B]

I do.

[A]

And one of our. One of your guy friends was married to one of my girlfriends.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I was with her. You were with him, and you. You guys were all at dinner. I get brought up again. Yeah, well, you tell the story because, like, now I'm telling it from your point of view.

[B]

I'm at dinner, and he's like. He's like, bro, my wife is with Maddie Pruitt. And I was like, really? He's like, I can invite them over right now to dinner because I had just been hyping you up, like, hey, I don't know who this girl is, but I want her to be like, I want a girl like that for my wife. And he was like, oh, I can get her over tonight. And I was like, no, I don't think tonight's a good night. Like, I was so not ready for it. And I don't know. I think I was just, like, embarrassed on, like, what if you came? And I wasn't, like, on my game. I was like, no, bro, don't. You don't have to bring her over. And that's the whole story, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I thought you're gonna, like, chime in on me. So that's my story.

[A]

That one. I had no idea that any of that was going on. Meanwhile, we have a family friend that was trying to, like, set up you and my brother. Set up me and his brother.

[B]

By the way, you had talked to.

[A]

My mom, and I had talked to your mom.

[B]

Launching your book made for this moment at our house. What are the. Hold on. That is insane.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

I didn't know you. You didn't know me because I had.

[A]

Just moved to Dallas. I didn't know, like, you were looking.

[B]

For an event, like, a space to drop your book.

[A]

We had mutual friends because. Yeah, we had mutual friends. That's who, like, connect me to your mom and was like, okay, like, the. The Trouts host, like, events at their house sometimes. Like, maybe you could ask, like, if you could host it at their house.

[B]

So this is 2021.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When you drop your book.

[A]

Huh?

[B]

20, 21. All right. You have a combo with my mom.

[A]

Conversation with your mom for like an.

[B]

Hour, by the way, is your mother.

[A]

In law, which is now my mother in law.

[B]

You had a combo.

[A]

I'm like, this woman is amazing. Like, we just. I was like, we're on the same page. She loves Jesus moment. She loves truth. And I in that phone call. And I'm like, man, we should grab some coffee sometime. I think I literally texted her, should go back and look. I think I literally text her and was like, we should grab coffee.

[B]

You need to go to the first.

[A]

Text of my mom.

[B]

She didn't text you back.

[A]

I don't think she text me back.

[B]

That's LT for you, man.

[A]

Was a great conversation. Then next thing I know. So that was the only understanding of that I had. Then the same guy.

[B]

There's a brother, Preston Trout, that you should be with.

[A]

Yes. There's a single Trout son that you guys should, like, get connected. Preston Trout. So my only understanding of the Trout family was Lisa and Preston Trout. So then, you know, And God is.

[B]

Just hiding me away, tucking me away, preparing me for my wife. Anybody that feels overlooked or hidden or unseen, God sees you.

[A]

Well, and it did not go anywhere with Preston. We didn't even text. We didn't go on a date. Nothing.

[B]

Did you just not feel peace to, like, pursue that?

[A]

No. I don't know. Whatever happened, I think it was, like, a flipping comment. And then there was just nothing on either of our ends. Like, I don't know that I ever, even, like, saw a picture. I don't remember the timeline of everything, but I remember when I found out that you were the blind date because I peer pressured Janine. All I knew was like, Trout was like, Lisa Trout, Preston Trout. That was all I knew. So I was like, there's another Trout.

[B]

Well, let's pause the story so no one's confused. Up until this point, I had seen you one time in Watermark Church. I dropped to my knees. Not literally, but I was like, who is this woman? I wanted to be my wife. You get brought up at dinner. He's like, I could bring you here right now for whatever reason. The Lord was like, no. And I was like, no, dude, not tonight.

[A]

Meanwhile, I've talked to your mom.

[B]

You've talked to my mom? Okay. Six months go by from all this. I'm in Branson, Missouri, working at Link here. The thought of Maddie is kind of like, I don't have an Instagram. I'm living in a Cabin in Branson. She's doing this big stuff, like, we probably won't. We're not on the same trajectory. And I don't think about you again. Come home until November. That felt a little harsh. I didn't.

[A]

You never crossed my mind. You couldn't have been further from my mind. Could have cared less.

[B]

I just didn't entertain it.

[A]

Yeah, fair.

[B]

You know what I'm saying? You keep your heart protected and guarded. You guard your heart. You don't entertain fantasy. That's not.

[A]

Don't awaken love.

[B]

So I come home, Thanksgiving break, J.D. rogers.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Shout out that dog. J.D. rogers looks at me. He says, grant, have a blind date for you December 3rd. He's like, you can't say no. It was early November, and I was like, jd, a blind date, bro. Like, come on, man. Like, what are we doing? And he looked at me and he was like, you can't say no. And I think you had just figured out, like, a week or so later it was me. So he came to me. He's like, hey, her name is Maddy Pruitt. It's that girl that you bumped into at church. He's like, but don't look up anything. Like, don't. Don't look at her Instagram. Just like, I want you to go into it blind. So I was like, literally, I was like, you know what? Let's do this thing.

[A]

And meanwhile, he had had the conversation with me. I went on a podcast at the church, and yeah, yeah, how it Happened. Finished the podcast. And he's like, are you single? And I was like, what?

[B]

Which, by the way, he was single.

[A]

At the time, or he was dating, but he didn't have a ring on. Like, and I didn't know anything about his life. And so I was like, why are you asking? And he was like, no, no, no, not for me, for my friend. And. And I was like, you blow it off. Don't they. I'm not the girl for the blind date. Like, no, no. I have trust issues. Like, I need to know everything about him. But I was like, okay, not going to do a blind date, so you.

[B]

Blow my boy off.

[A]

I didn't take it seriously. But then see him again because him and Janine were friends. And so then we had, like, some people over at our house, and Janine had invited him and his now wife Jenna over, and he was just, like, going in on this guy, and I needed to go. Nothing that I needed to go on a date with. And I'm like, he, like, is a good friend.

[B]

Wasn't it, like, two hours of just putting me down?

[A]

It was an hour. Janine got mad at me because I wasn't cleaning up after the party, and she was doing all the work because JD was going in on how I needed to go on a date.

[B]

And what did he say? Tell me a couple of things about what he said.

[A]

He was like, he loves Jesus. He has a heart for ministry. Okay.

[B]

Okay, cool.

[A]

He disciples. He was like, he disciples, guys.

[B]

All right, all right.

[A]

He is tall and handsome. He played basketball. What? Yeah. I was like, this sounds like my dream guy that I've always.

[B]

He kind of hyped me a little too much. I'm like, golly, no.

[A]

And so I'm like, okay. I mean, who would I be to not go on this date?

[B]

I guess I'll go.

[A]

Like, you've actually. Did you look at my journal of everything I've prayed for? And so I'm like, all right, I'm gonna. I'm gonna say yes to this. And then I say yes, not knowing who it is. Not knowing anything about it.

[B]

Nothing.

[A]

And then I think a week before, I finally. I peer pressured Jeanine, and I was like, you have to tell me who. Who it is, and who am I going to.

[B]

Just gave it to you.

[A]

Janine caved. She. She did.

[B]

So we both knew each other's name before going into it, and we both had these weird touch points on, like, I kind of know who you are, but I know nothing about how you are.

[A]

Well, I went and looked at your Instagram, and he had, like, four photos. I mean, he had, like, just got Instagram.

[B]

I just got.

[A]

So I'm like, stalking his tagged photos. I'm like, how can I find.

[B]

During all of this, you're following JD, and JD's like, Grant, I'm about to hype you up on my stories.

[A]

I'm like, all of a sudden, on JD's close friends story.

[B]

So we're playing basketball, and he's posting me. Every shot I make. He's posting it.

[A]

It's like all. It's like, every shot, like, Grant is just like, nail. And then.

[B]

And he will show me. He's like, look who just watched it.

[A]

And Grant's in, like, a muscle tank. I'm like, oh, okay. I mean, all right. I'm going on a date with this guy.

[B]

It was so calculated for a blind.

[A]

Date, but you looked good, and I was excited.

[B]

Felt good. Yeah.

[A]

So I was like, okay, I'm excited for this blind date. And it felt. I mean, before you even came and Picked me up. Like, it. There was something different.

[B]

I was.

[A]

I felt different.

[B]

So nervous.

[A]

So nervous.

[B]

And you don't typically get nervous for that. I'm hit or miss on that stuff, but, like, you don't get nervous. You were smacking your gum like crazy.

[A]

Well, Janine has a video of me, and I'm like. She's like, okay, how do you feel? Like this could be your last first date ever. It was like, we both, by the.

[B]

Way, tip trick on, like, first dates. I didn't tell her this, but I pulled out my phone and I recorded this selfie video on, like, hey, Grant. Or did I say Maddie or Grant? Was I addressing me or.

[A]

You can't remember?

[B]

I was like, hey, G, if you're. If you're watching this later, you're about to go on your first date with Maddie. I'm really nervous, but if this goes well, I hope you show her one day. And I just made this whole little thing. And you did the same with Janine. Yeah, it was like, hey, I'm about to go on a first date. And then on our. When we got engaged and we got. Is that what it's called? Yeah, engaged. I was, like, gonna say propose, and we got engaged.

[A]

Like, yes.

[B]

We both showed each other these different selfie videos we had made throughout our time of dating, from the moment we knew each other to, like, getting engaged to is really special.

[A]

Hey, friends, it's Maddie. If you've read my new book, Dare to be True, I would love to hear what you think. Your reviews mean so much to me. They help more people discover the message and the heart behind this book. So if this book has encouraged you, challenged you, or reminded you to live with bold faith and honesty, would you just take a minute to leave a review? It truly makes such a difference. And if you haven't gotten my new book yet, Dare to Be True, you can go and find it anywhere books are sold. Thank you so much for being a part of this journey and for daring to be true. Right alongside me. Stay True Merch drop. We got a new Stay True Merch collection, you guys. And this is my favorite collection yet. I am wearing the jersey from the Stay True Merch collection. And you guys, it is so amazing. It says Stay True on the front, stay free on the back. It's got John 8:32. It is the coolest jersey you've ever seen. But we have sweatshirts. We got T shirts. This is seriously my favorite collection yet. This is the perfect Christmas gift, birthday gift, New Year gift to yourself. You guys you need to check out this new collection. I'm so excited about it. And you can go to Stay True podcast dot com. We'll also include the link to the exact merch landing page in the show notes. You guys gotta go and check it out. Let me know what you think. If you rep it, tag us. We want to see it. Go and check it out, you guys. Okay, so I want to dive into some of these moments. So one, for starters, you saw me at church and you were interested, but you didn't make a move. Oh, you did make a move.

[B]

Are we teaching now? Are we going into, like, I want to ask.

[A]

Because, like, this is what. This is. What the ladies want to know is like, okay, what takes a guy so long to make the first move?

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Or slash? And when. When does a guy feel the confidence and assurance to be like, I'm going to ask a girl out or, I'm going to make that first move?

[B]

Okay, Season is everything. I would start there. I would say, like, for Christians who are in a season of, typically, the Lord can, like, define your season. You'll kind of have this feeling of like, this is what I think God is doing in me right now. So for Christians, I would say, like, know your season. You know, be comfortable and confident to identify as best as you can. This is, I believe, the season God has me in and the season that I was in for, that was a lot of inner transformational work. So up until 2018, I was running after the things of the world. I was doing a lot of stuff, a lot of relationships I shouldn't have been doing. And so this was early 2020. I was just a few years into following Jesus. I remember when I saw you, I had this, like, longing in my heart, but this quick little voice that met me and was like, hey, remember. Remember all that we're doing right now. And so I would say, know your season, girl or guy, try your best to identify. What season am I in? Number two, why guys don't go up to girls. I would say it's fear of rejection. Like, it's fear of rejection. And that at least was. Is what was leading for me when I was at that table and that friend said, hey, I can bring them over here now. Instantly, I was like, well, what if she's not into it? Like, I am. And I just think that's a lot of dude's problem. And we're not willing to, like, say that because you got to be, like, strong and tough. But, like, fear, rejection is so real. And yeah, totally. And to, like, put yourself out there, especially when they don't know much about you. They're literally. You're putting almost your value in their hands for a second to go, are you worth it or not to me, to even go out on a date that is so vulnerable, to walk up to you and go, would you want to go out with me? And you are now holding. And if you're not secure in Christ, you're now holding my value in your hands to go, you're worth it or nah. Now, I know that's a lot of pressure to put on a girl. That's not. Like, you don't need to hold that pressure, but that's what a guy can feel.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which is really intense.

[A]

Well, and then I felt it, I guess, role reversal when I went on the Bachelor in a public way of, like, you're literally like, okay, my worth is tied to this rose. Like, am I gonna be good enough or not? And so I would say I got to taste a little bit of what that feels like. And it is a weird and, like, vulnerable place to be. But it's cool. I think it's so cool and refreshing, though, when a guy. No matter if the reaction or the response is like, I'm interested or not interested, but when a guy's like, when you do get to a point where you're just like, okay, I'm just gonna go for it. Like, I'm just gonna, like, yeah, I'm just gonna ask you out, and if you say no, you say no.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I feel like that's where you ultimately got was. And I think JD Was, like, encouraging you. He's like, bro, like, who would you be if you didn't. If you didn't try.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's like. And then. I mean, same for me. Like, I. I remember when we started dating, Like, I was like, I've never felt this way about anyone before. And even when you broke up with me, he broke up with me. Rude. So rude.

[B]

For a day.

[A]

And, yeah. Literally last. I don't even think it lasted 24 hours. It did, but, like, that. I mean, it's vulnerable, and it's like that fear of rejection that honestly doesn't really go away until there's, like, a ring on your finger. You know what I mean?

[B]

Like, let me. Let me speak a little bit more to it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Know your season. Identify the fear of rejection. So we're never led by fear. So if there's fear there, it's like, dude, lean into that. Like, lean in. The third thing is Is like, you want to. Is this balance on, like, playing it cool versus, like, being too, too into it at the start. And so I think that's what guys think through also is, like, you're calm but kind of freaking out. And how do I give the calm, cool, confident, yet inside, I'm kind of like, oh, man. I'm a little like, yeah. And I think that's what we're balancing mostly is like, is it too soon? Do they like this? Like, some girls love that. Other girls could be weirded out by that. So you don't even know me. And it's, like, hard to know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What response you're gonna get. So this. There's this, like, war going on, and I feel like it's. It's such a wrestle, and guys will huddle up and be like, bro, just do it. Just do it. Just do it. And you got to almost, like, gear your boys up to do it. You're like, three, two, one. Go do it. And that's like, the best story when you know your season, you know your identity, and you just go do it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yes. No, Maybe. I think for the boys, you're still like, bro, you did it.

[A]

And, like, having those good godly friends, like, you had such good godly men around you. And I even think about some of the guys you're, like, discipling right now and how you'll have, like, y' all meet weekly and how y' all have, like, gathered around the table and been like, okay, bro, like, you gotta ask her, like, and you're all rallying like, you got it, you got it. Like, ask her out. Yeah, let's go. Stay True podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. And, like, some of those people have, like, are now in a relationship and it's just. It's cool. Like, when you have those godly guys and you have those godly friends around you that are going to, like, push you in the right direction and see, like, okay, you're seeking Jesus all of your heart. Here's another woman who's, like, seeking Jesus with all of her heart that, like, your godly dudes aren't going to let you, like, go after somebody who, like, wouldn't be a good fit for you.

[B]

Do you think it's like, okay to be like, hey, do you want to hang out? Or do you think the first time you hang out, one on one should be called date?

[A]

I. I almost view it, like, two different ways. I think that one way to do it is it's a lot of, like, group hangouts and just spend a lot of time. You just kind of like group settings.

[B]

Solo off for a little bit.

[A]

And maybe you have. Yeah, maybe you have, like, little interaction moments where, like, you're letting each other know, like, you're kind of interested, but everybody here.

[B]

I'm, like, trying to really be here.

[A]

Like, we've seen a lot of friends do that where it's like, you aren't putting this, like, big pressure on, like, I'm going to ask you out and pursue you. You're just kind of, like, getting to know each other in group settings, kind of establishing a base level, like friendship, but, like, letting that person kind of know. Like, you know, like, there's other, you know, for you. If there were other, like, girls around, like, you're. You're coming up to me and you're singling me out a little bit more than anybody else. But, yeah, like, kind of doing it more of a group way. I think another way to do it is just. Yeah. To be just, like, bold and clear and lead with clarity of like, hey, I'm interested in you. I'd love to take you on a date. I'd love to take you to dinner.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Which is, I mean, for us, the only thing we knew because you were living in Missouri and I was living in Dallas. And so, yeah, we didn't have that chance to, like, like, a group. A group setting in that dynamic because we were long distance, would have even felt, like, more pressure because it's like, oh, we're all getting this group together for, like, Maddie and Grant to, like, spend time together. Yeah. And then everyone's watching us, and that's just weird. So I think in our situation, it made way more sense for you to.

[B]

Just be like, all that stuff is so hard. And, like, it just is. Yeah, it's like emotions. It's. It's. What's hard about it is when you're not being clear. And it's all kind of like a guessing game. Yeah, I just remember those. I remember that, like, you're just kind of going, what are they thinking? Are they feeling it? Like, I'm feeling it, but I got to play it cool. And I want to be clear. All that's really hard. And I feel like, why do you.

[A]

Think that so many guys don't lead with clarity often, because we're not.

[B]

I don't. I don't think we were taught it. I don't think we were taught to do that. I think what's celebrated in culture, play it cool, be a player. Like, everything in culture celebrates like, dude, don't be a weirdo. Don't be like, the clear. You know, like, what? It's why it's the upside down kingdom. It's like, hey, be in control. Be super cool. Make her guess, make her wonder. But everything about the kingdom is like, lead with clarity. Go low. Make her feel totally confident. And so I would just say, like, everything in culture, movies, music, whatever, whatever we're in taking is everything but clarity.

[A]

It's anti godly.

[B]

It's everything but clarity.

[A]

The Bible doesn't talk about dating. So I think that also is hard because you have this single life addressed and you have this married life addressed, but you kind of find yourself being like, well, then how should this whole dating life go? Like, what should dating look like?

[B]

There's got to be, like, a book of the Bible that didn't make it that, like, our brother Paul's like, I.

[A]

Asked if Paul's like, I had a.

[B]

Dating one, but, like, I just didn't think it would make it. We're like, dang it, Paul. Like, we're all asking for it.

[A]

We want to know.

[B]

I wonder what Jesus would say.

[A]

Like, times were so different than. Though it was like the arranged marriages and people were getting married, like, 18.

[B]

Yeah. Or. Yeah.

[A]

Or younger.

[B]

I just. I'm like, jesus, what would you say to the Dating Game right now? I feel like he'd have the best, funniest, smooth. Like, I feel like he. Like. And I know we can ask him. That's the cool thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's like, we'd be like, jesus, what do I do in dating? And he wants to tell us.

[A]

That's right. Like, that's what I want to pause on for a second.

[B]

Yeah. Like, the guessing can actually be answered when we ask God about it. And you don't have to guess your way through it all. And I feel like for us, it's not always like, hey, Romans 14 says, Grant, now do this with Maddie. But it's like, enough to lead me in peace to go, I think I should do this next. And. And then community comes alongside with some verses you. You weren't thinking about and says, hey, Grant, like, godly men always lead like this. And.

[A]

And you may not do it perfectly. I mean, I would say Our dating life was not perfect.

[B]

It really wasn't.

[A]

It really wasn't. And I think there were some things that we did well and things that we didn't do well. Things that we learned from, that we now get to share and things that I feel like we did well and that we now get to share.

[B]

Can we just say, when you got the two biggest flirts in their own high schools that came together, it was. It was just like a lot of passion, a lot of emotion, excitement.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think if we.

[A]

A lot of personality.

[B]

Yeah, we just, like. It was so fun, though.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It was so flirty. And I would just say if we could talk to Grant and Maddie, like, now it's like, hey, go slower on the emotions.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We were quick to say things like talk about future too fast.

[A]

We were very, I would say at the beginning, very emotion led and driven. And I would also say we were selfish. Like, we were used to being, I think. And I don't mean served. Like people were like, you know, literally serving us, but, like, served in a sense of like, you were probably used to some girls pursuing you. I was used to some guys, like, whatever. And so then it's like, you come in with these, like, expectations of, like, well, this is how it should be. You know what I mean? And then it's like, you. You find finally a healthy relationship and you're like, oh, wait, the Bible, you know, has this model of, like, it's all about serving each other and, like, loving each other and going low.

[B]

But, like, is it in dating, is it serving each other?

[A]

I think it is. I think you practice that. Okay, so let me just pull off some more questions.

[B]

I wasn't gonna ask you out because I was actually afraid you were gonna say no or you weren't gonna like Me and Jenna, JD's fiance was like. She literally said, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take, which is that MJ quote. And that's why I asked you out.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

I said no to jd just so you know. And it wasn't. Cause I didn't want to. I was just afraid if I actually put myself out there and you were like, nah, it would be this, like, public thing where people were like, kind of hyping it up, just so you know.

[A]

Well, I'm glad.

[B]

Shout out, Jenna. That's it.

[A]

I'm glad you took your shot, man.

[B]

So for anybody out there, it's like, take. Take the shot. Take the shot.

[A]

What are some qualities non physical that guys find attractive? In a girl.

[B]

Non physical. Of course. So many. Of course we're looking for so many. I'm totally kidding. Like, men of God are looking first and foremost at. What I would say is. What I looked for initially off the bat is how do you respect people that can do nothing for you? So how do you treat Uber driver? How do you treat waitress? How do you treat barista? How do you treat person holding the door at the hotel? Like, that stuff really, really, really matters. And I think if you see like a disrespect or just like a flippancy or even like a making fun of, like, I just, I think that's initially what I'm looking for. I think you can tell a lot about somebody on how they treat everybody.

[A]

Can you tell if someone's faking it?

[B]

Yeah, for sure. I think like, authenticity is so easily identifiable and if you're trying to be somebody you're not. Maybe the first date, maybe the second date. Like, there's going to come a time though, where like, you forget I'm watching you. And it's like, oh, I saw that, like when he messed up your drink order. Like, whoa, okay. And no dude's going to say it out loud, but you're just like that. And that's a big time marker of like, wow. So I would say like, number one, looking at character number two, I'm like, man, are you, Are you bringing other women down in your conversation? Like, are you, are you, like, gossip's the wrong word. I think we can all fall into that. But it's like, do you tear other people down? And I think that's a big thing that dudes, like, it's just unattractive. Like, if I hear you just to me, and you may not say it, but if I hear you trying to like make yourself look better than another girl to me, it's just like, man, it's okay. You don't have to like, I like you, I'm on this date with you. Like, that over explaining is something like, I think I can tell. Do you know who you are with or without me?

[A]

Yeah. Confidence is attractive.

[B]

Yes. Confidence is the most attractive thing that before you know who you're dating, you know who you are. So before you know that if we're going to make it or not, I can tell exactly. Like, with or without me, you are good. That's the most attractive thing. And that is bled out in the way you talk about people. You love people. You don't bring other people down. Guys can really see that when you say Man, I can't believe she. And look at what she. And what about her, by the way? No dude is impressed with that. And no guy is like, yeah, that's. I love when you do that. It's like, man, I just want to see that you know exactly who you are. And that comes by uplifting people, encouraging people, serving people. Like, it's really easy to see that.

[A]

Yeah, truly confident people, you don't need to tear other people down to feel better about yourself. You truly can actually do the opposite. You can lift other people up because you're so secure in who you are. Confidence is so attractive both ways. Like, I would say that that was one of the biggest, like, icks I would get with a guy is if he was super insecure and, like, overly clingy or, like, wanted to be. Yeah. Just, like, near me all the time. Like, I don't even know. Like, just, like, very clingy. Very. Just, like, insecure.

[B]

Cockiness is not confidence.

[A]

Cockiness is not. Is not confidence. And insecurity is unattractive. Like. Like, it's.

[B]

And by the way, we all have insecurity, so it's not that you don't have insecurity. It's just, like, you can tell when you're trying to make up for your insecurity.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

By, like, leaning the other way.

[A]

I would say if your insecurity is your whole personality, like, that is unattractive.

[B]

What does that mean?

[A]

Like, if you. If you are just. Every word you speak is just a word of insecurity. Like, if, like what. Every comment you make or every perspective you have is. Is through the lens of. Of insecurity. Like, if you're just like, I don't know. I'm just trying to think, like, if I'm. If I'm talking to somebody or if I'm the person and I'm just like, man, I just. I don't know, like, my. My hair doesn't look good today. Or like, oh, gosh. Like, I just. I wish, like, my. This. This looked better. Or, man, I don't know. Like, this didn't work out because I probably just, like, wasn't. Wasn't good enough for the job they took somebody. Like, I don't know. Just the little, like, constant insecure comments. And then I also would say, like, insecure actions, like being overly clingy, being, like, obsessive, being, like, constantly asking, like, well, how do you feel about me? Like, where is this go? Are. Do. Are you good? Are we okay?

[B]

I think that's another big one. That is the over is. Is like, the wanting them to over communicate and commit. Like, no, we're good.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I think at some point a guy's just like, man. Like.

[A]

But to challenge the dudes, like, be clear and be honest. Like, don't leave a girl wondering.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

But don't leave a girl wondering. If you're not into her, tell her you're not into her anymore. You know what I mean? Like, a girl shouldn't have to be in a position of, like, are we good? Like, are we still, like, headed in the right direction? Like, I don't know.

[B]

And then I think the dude would say, oh, I said it yesterday, right? Like, I thought. I thought what I said yesterday, I meant it.

[A]

Right?

[B]

And that's what it. And that's.

[A]

We can play both sides once you're married. Like, this is what's funny is, like, once you're married.

[B]

She'Ll literally look at me at night to be like, do you still love me? I'm like, do I still love you?

[A]

Honestly, I just like to say we.

[B]

Disagreed on, like, the spaghetti, and she's like, do you still love me?

[A]

I honestly just like to hear it sometimes, but it's not. It's not like a genuine, like, oh, my goodness, does he not love me anymore? It's like, hey, do you still love me? Like, just tell me that you still love me. But. And I think, again, there's such a difference in, like, being a needy person that you constantly need someone to, like, affirm you, validate you. Like, assure you, I'm good. We're good. We're in this together. Like, we're gonna get. If you constantly need that, versus, like, you're really secure in who you are.

[B]

And, like, it's just good to hear.

[A]

And you're just like, hey, like, I should hear right now, like, do you love me? You love me, right? Like, that is so different than just, like, every day being like, hey, are we okay? Like, are we good? Are you. Have you changed your mind? Like, are you not into me anymore? Like, do you even still want to be with me? I think there's such a different approach in that. I don't remember the original question I asked, but that was a really good.

[B]

It's. It's the character that you look for. We're looking for most, I would say, to be honest, like, the dude, instantly, it's like. It's the physical. It's like, is she. Is she.

[A]

Guys are visual.

[B]

Yeah. Just absolutely. That's how it is. Like, are you the type that I'm. Are you like the type that God made me attracted to? And anybody that says that's not the first thing I think is lying, I would say, yeah, because. But then very quickly it's like, okay, I know that that will, like, not last. That won't. That will fade quick. And so, like, now let me get to know you. And that's just it. Like, and dudes have different, like, I don't know, types. Tastes like all of it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so, yeah, so there shouldn't be.

[A]

Like an, like a beauty standard that it's like everybody has to look like this. It's like, no, no. Like, everybody's wired differently. Like, everyone has different types. Taste.

[B]

I got always dated a girl brown hair. Preston always dated a girl with blonde hair. And there's no standard of beauty. It's just like, who do you feel most drawn to?

[A]

Totally. Okay, so let's see the next question. At first, well, you do have to talk about how important it is of where they are spiritually. That's obviously the most important.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

He's like, oh, yeah. Their relationship with Jesus. I mean, I would say. And one thing to touch on is like, first date. Like, I do want to touch on this because people are like, okay, how deep do you go? First date? What do you talk about? First date? And what I loved about our first date is that it was the perfect blend of fun and deep. And so we got to spend. I would say the first part of our date at dinner was like, this is our time to share our testimonies. This is our time to ask really intentional questions, like, over the course of a meal, like, this is our time to, like, get deep and share, you know, what we feel led to share. And I would just say, like, don't overshare. Like, I would say they're a part of our testimonies that we didn't get into, like, details of.

[B]

Totally, totally.

[A]

Not on first date, but I think high level testimony where you're really just sharing, like, your passion for Jesus, how Jesus is saved you and rescued you. For those of you who follow Jesus or just like sharing your story, like, what you've been through in life, what you've experienced in life, and kind of like what's made you you and where you are today and why you maybe have the job that you have or the passions you have. Like, that's kind of overarching conversation we had at dinner. And so it wasn't a lot of like. Like, we weren't laughing a ton at dinner. I would say it was a little more serious. And then I would say, after dinner, we kind of. We were just, like, driving around listening to music. And that's when we were, like, being silly and laughing it fun. It felt like a movie. I was like, this is my husband.

[B]

I remember you, like, put your hand on my shoulder. And I was just like, I think I'm in heaven. I think this is going so amazing. We call J.D.

[A]

We did.

[B]

And he was expecting me to be.

[A]

Like, oh, bro, like, it didn't work out.

[B]

And you were like. He said you were, like, so close to the phone, like, laughing. We were like, hey, let's make a music video tomorrow. What was Shawn Mendes's song?

[A]

Oh, my goodness.

[B]

But, like, spit the, like, oh, Senorita, Senorita.

[A]

Well. And he was laughing because he was like, guys, I think we're moving a little too fast. He's like, maybe we don't do music.

[B]

But we're not going to start with senorita, by the way.

[A]

He's like.

[B]

I was like, I saw a rose in my mouth with a tuxedo.

[A]

And we were so. Stay true. Podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail], progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.

[B]

Hey, first date. How would you engage with, like, a friend? And it's like, what would I want to know with a friend? I want to know their story. I want to. I'm curious. I want to know how you grew up. Tell me about your parents. How many siblings? Wait, who are you closer with? Oh, you grew up playing basketball.

[A]

I would even say we had, like, the, like, hey, I'm interested in pursuing.

[B]

Um, I would not. I would not.

[A]

I wouldn't do that.

[B]

Like, have fun, be normal, engage and, like, get to know. Laugh a little bit. And then. And I think out of that bleeds, like, yeah, I'm learning. What is she passionate about? What is her purpose?

[A]

And I think when you're really interested in someone, it naturally is going to develop into that. Because I think when you're not, like, I know for me, when I've been on first dates with someone that I know, it ain't going nowhere. Like, I know that. That is not.

[B]

Here's the thing we should talk about is how quickly on the first date.

[A]

Do you know in seconds?

[B]

No, no. But I'm Just saying, like, how quickly should you know, versus push through some things and go? Because I think for me too, I could probably tell within the first. I would say maybe majority of people can. You can like, kind of tell, should you? Obviously, you should finish the date. Cordially. Yeah. Hey, time out, by the way.

[A]

Never mind. Listen, we're 10 minutes in, so catch an Uber.

[B]

Listen, I don't want you to pay for this quesadillas either. Like, I got it. You just go clearly finish the first date, obviously.

[A]

But yeah, no, I.

[B]

Do you push past that or are there some things you're just like, No, I just know.

[A]

No, I just know. But I will say, okay. There were guys that I went on date. I went on a few dates with just to give it time. Because I do think that it could be one of those things. Like, for example, our first date, amazing. Felt like a movie. Our second date, horrible. It was so bad.

[B]

Yeah, not too bad, but it just wasn't amazing. I mean, horrible.

[A]

The category of horrible feels, like, pretty bad.

[B]

I mean, Mav's game and dinner, it was bad.

[A]

Just admit it. It was really bad. And I think that our. And then our third date was great. And so it's just like, what was our third date? I don't really remember.

[B]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

Right. It was when you came over.

[B]

She remembers the bad. Could care less about the good times I had.

[A]

Her first date was so good. No, I think it was when you came over and you basically were just like, I'm so sorry. Like, I just want you to know, like, I'm dealing with anxiety right now and this had nothing to do with you. It was just, like, something that I was feeling and going through. And that was really cool. I was like, whoa. I've never even seen, like, strength and confidence modeled in this way with a guy. Like, I think most of the time guys are like, I have to. Like, I can't show. Like, when I feel not myself. Like, I have to just.

[B]

Everything in me said defense and, like, just break it off.

[A]

But I was so grateful that you didn't do that. And I see. I would say my natural instinct is to be that way is to be like, I'm good. I don't need anybody. I'm not ever gonna let anyone see my weakness. Like, I think I needed to see that, like, you could go first and be like. Because vulnerability breeds vulnerability. I think when you were vulnerable and you showed, like, hey, this was a moment that, like, I wasn't my best self and I just gotta, like, be Honest with you about that. And I'm sorry. Like, that what. That doesn't have anything to do with you. And this is when you were clear with me, like. Cause I think at this point, I was like, I think he's really interested in me.

[B]

Yeah. We both had no idea what it was.

[A]

Have that moment of, like, hey, like, I'm pursuing you for the long run.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And this was the moment where you were like, hey, I just want you to know, like, I am. Am interested in you. I do want to pursue you. And I just had. Had to be honest with you that. Like, that last date that we had, that didn't go the best. Like, it just had nothing to do with you. It was just, like, something I was.

[B]

When we say didn't go the best, just so everyone's clear, like, I. I just, like, kind of shut down.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I just refer. I very much got in my head. I did. I felt like I couldn't be me. And I was dealing with so much anxiety. And then the lies came. Yeah, she doesn't want to be here. She's not happy on this date. Dude. Just wrap it up. And I remember just kind of that spiral. Like, I let it spiral.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And all the while, I loved the. I loved being with you. And I just, like, it's so crazy.

[A]

Literally, when I tell you guys, we're sitting at dinner and it's like, I'm asking a question, short answer back. I'm asking another question. Maybe an answer back hurts me. And I'm, like, sitting here like, so, like, you want to wrap it up? Like, I don't know what else to ask. I've asked. Like, I need to pull out Chat. GBT and ask. Chat.

[B]

I know, right? Like, combos. When he has not to say.

[A]

He's not answering me.

[B]

Chat.

[A]

Is he into me anymore? Yeah, it was. It was a very. I would say first date, I was like, oh. Like, it's in the bag. Like, this is my husband. Like, he's so into me. I'm so into him. Second date, I was. I was in then in my head of, like, well, he doesn't seem into me anymore. Like, I guess this isn't going anywhere. Now I'm confused. So then when you came over the third time and you explained that, I. I really respected that you were honest, that you shared. Like. Like, I loved that you showed kind of a. Like, I don't want to say weak. Like, your anxiety doesn't make you weak, but you were just, like, vulnerable about something that you were struggling with. Totally and that was really attractive to me. Okay. That was so good. I do. I think we need a part two.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

I think we need a part two. We need to, like, keep asking.

[B]

There's a lot more.

[A]

There's a lot more to dive in here. I got some more things to ask you. You got some things to ask me. And these are really, really helpful. I think that, you know, there's a lot of you guys out there that are single and dating and have been asking some questions, and so we're happy to get to them. So stay tuned, come back next week for part two. And as always, guys, be sure to stay you. Stay True. We love you. Stay True podcast is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.