012. Kevin Ryan, Yannis Pappas, & Mike Finoia | The Law

Summary

Podcast Summary: Story Warz Episode 012 – Kevin Ryan, Yannis Pappas, & Mike Finoia | The Law

Introduction

In Episode 012 of Story Warz: A Game of Deceptive Storytelling, hosted by GaS Digital Network's Big Jay Oakerson and Luis J. Gomez, the show faces initial technical glitches but proceeds enthusiastically with a stellar lineup. Kevin Ryan, Yannis Pappas, and Mike Finoia join the “Story Warriors” at The Stand Comedy Club in New York City to engage in a hilariously competitive game centered around The Law.

Guests Introduced

• Mike Fenoia: Renowned comedian from the “Are You Garbage?” podcast and a notable YouTube special.
• Kevin Ryan: Another standout from the “Are You Garbage?” podcast series.
• Yannis Pappas: Famous for “Office Hour” and his YouTube special “Mom Love Available.”

Game Mechanics Explained [02:14 – 05:13]

Big Jay Okerson lays out the rules of Story Warz:

• Submission: Each participant submits three to five true stories centered on the theme The Law.
• Presentation: The producer, Alex, randomly reads the stories aloud.
• Objective: If the story is yours, you must deceive others into believing it’s not. If the story belongs to someone else, you must identify its true author.
• Scoring:
  • Deception Success: 1 point per person fooled.
  • Correct Guess: 2 points.
  • Unique Scoring: If a participant successfully deceives all others, they achieve a "clean sweep."

Notable Quote:

Giannis Pappas [02:22]: "Story Wars. Story War. Story War. Finn winning."

Round 1: Jury Duty [06:23 – 14:19]

Story Submission: "I have never served jury duty and I don't know why."

Discussion: Participants fiercely debate whose story it could be. Giannis and Kevin exhibit strong deflections, while Lewis J. Gomez suspects Big Jay.

Notable Quote:

Giannis Pappas [07:25]: "Lewis would know why."

Outcome: Lewis J. Gomez successfully deceives everyone into believing Big Jay authored the story, achieving a clean sweep.

Alex [14:03]: "I have Lewis in the lead with four points."

Round 2: Traffic Court Representation [14:19 – 26:38]

Story Submission: "I once had a family member who is not a lawyer represent me in traffic court."

Discussion: The panel considers various angles, with Big Jay and Yannis presenting potential biases. Giannis leans towards Kevin due to the story's premise aligning with his persona.

Notable Quote:

Kevin Ryan [16:11]: "I've never had any court appearances. You could be lying right?"

Outcome: The story is revealed to belong to Lewis, earning him additional points.

Alex [26:38]: "Lewis with 10 points and Big J with 14."

Round 3: Cop-Instructed Prostitute Interaction [27:36 – 44:21]

Story Submission: "A cop car pulled up behind me, and over his speaker instructed a prostitute to walk away from my car."

Discussion: The narrative becomes more convoluted as participants attempt to link the story to their own experiences. Mike suspects it’s related to Lewis, given their shared backgrounds.

Notable Quote:

Lewis J. Gomez [28:50]: "That's so offensive. He keeps taking Jersey."

Outcome: Big Jay successfully claims the story, adding to his lead.

Alex [44:40]: "You guys, that was eight. Clean sweep for Big J over."

Round 4: Addressing Female Judge [37:08 – 47:19]

Story Submission: "Once, while in court facing charges I nervously called the female judge 'sir' more than each time. Each time she was less forgiving and more pissed off."

Discussion: The panel debates the authenticity and relevance of each participant's past, with Giannis and Kevin attempting to distance themselves from the story.

Outcome: The story is attributed to Giannis, slightly closing the points gap.

Alex [47:19]: "Lewis with 10 points and Big J with 14."

Round 5: Helping a Friend Escape [48:40 – 60:36]

Story Submission: "I was once asked to help a friend escape."

Discussion: Participants scrutinize each other's backgrounds, with Lewis and Mike defending their innocence while Giannis accuses Big Jay of potential deceit.

Notable Quote:

Paul [56:55]: "I got him dead to rights."

Outcome: Lewis J. Gomez emerges as a frontrunner, successfully misleading the group once again.

Alex [60:36]: "Final scores. I have Giannis with six points, Mike Finoya with eight points, Kevin Ryan with 11 points, Big J with 14, and Lewis with 18."

Round 6: Fake ID Incident [64:25 – 85:07]

Story Submission: "In college, I got caught drinking with a fake ID. I panicked and snitched on my older friend who got me the ID. He later hooked up with my ex."

Discussion: The group dives deep into personal histories, with Kevin and Lewis quickly attempting to claim or deflect the story. Big Jay suspects Mike, while Giannis leans towards Lewis.

Notable Quote:

Giannis Pappas [66:19]: "I didn't really start drinking until I was close to 21 years old."

Outcome: The story is confirmed to belong to Lewis, solidifying his top position.

Round 7: Officer Harry Potter [73:09 – 105:34]

Story Submission: "I once got a ticket for being drunk and calling a young-looking rookie cop 'Officer Harry Potter.'"

Discussion: This round intensifies as participants dissect each other's mannerisms and past behaviors. Kevin and Mike vie to claim the story, with Big Jay and Lewis interpreting clues from body language and speech patterns.

Notable Quote:

Mike Fenoia [81:25]: "I've had a cop pull a gun on me."

Outcome: The story is ultimately revealed to be Lewis’s, earning him significant points.

Round 8: Cop Pulling a Gun [106:13 – 105:34]

Story Submission: "I've had a cop pull a gun on me."

Discussion: The final story prompts intense speculation, with participants analyzing each other's credibility and consistency. Giannis becomes increasingly agitated, suspecting Big Jay, while Kevin defends his innocence.

Notable Quote:

Giannis Pappas [100:33]: "I've had a couple of guns pulled on me, guys."

Outcome: The story is disclosed as belonging to Lewis J. Gomez, who triumphs with the highest score.

Final Scores

• Lewis J. Gomez: 18 points
• Big Jay Okerson: 14 points
• Kevin Ryan: 11 points
• Mike Fenoia: 8 points
• Yannis Pappas: 6 points

Conclusion

Louis J. Gomez emerges victorious, skillfully deceiving all competitors and accruing the highest points. The episode showcases sharp wit, playful deception, and humorous banter, embodying the essence of Story Warz. As the game concludes, the hosts and guests celebrate Lewis’s win, highlighting the entertaining dynamics and competitive spirit that make Story Warz a standout in the comedy podcast arena.

Notable Closing Quote:

Big J Okerson [107:12]: "Catch you guys next time on Story Wars."

Additional Highlights

• Sponsor Mentions: The episode features plugs for various podcasts and the sponsor IPVanish, integrating promotional content seamlessly into the gameplay.
• Engaging Banter: The chemistry among hosts and guests adds depth, with frequent humorous exchanges and playful accusations enhancing the listening experience.
• Interactive Gameplay: The escalating point system, including double and triple points in later rounds, intensifies the competition, keeping listeners engaged throughout.

Conclusion for New Listeners

For those unfamiliar with Story Warz, Episode 012 offers a quintessential example of the show's blend of comedy, clever storytelling, and interactive gameplay. Through the theme of The Law, listeners witness a captivating contest of deception and deduction, framed by the dynamic performances of seasoned comedians and engaging guests. Whether you're a fan of comedy podcasts or enjoy competitive storytelling games, this episode is a must-listen.

Transcript

[Big J Okerson]

Hey, what's up, Story Warriors? It's Big J here. A little disclaimer. Before the show this week, we had a corrupted file in the audio. Our producers did everything they could, worked tirelessly to get out the best product we could with this week considering we had all these technical issues. We will have a show again next week with all these problems fixed. But the episode was so fantastic. We had Kevin Ryan, Giannis Pappas, Mike Fenoya on, so we wanted to make sure we got it out there. If you could bare with the audio, we very much appreciate it. We apologize greatly. And again, we'll be back with normal awesome tech next week on Story Wars. Until then, enjoy the newest episode with Kevin Ryan, Giannis Pappas, and Mike Fenoya on Story Wars.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Fill her up.

[Big J Okerson]

You're listening to the Gas Digital Network.

[Giannis Pappas]

Ladies and gentlemen, it's Story wars with the Story Warriors, Big J. Okerson and Lewis J. Gomez.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, thank you, everybody. What's up? Welcome to Story wars, everybody.

[Giannis Pappas]

Story Wars. Story War. Story War. Finn winning.

[Big J Okerson]

We are your Story Warriors, Louis J. Gomez and Big J. Okerson.

[Giannis Pappas]

What's up, doggies? What's up, doggies and doggettes? Are you ready to have your stories, Story Warrior?

[Big J Okerson]

I do gotta say, I feel like, and I don't want to yell at production here at all, please, but I feel like this poor guy is uncomfortably close to a light. There's no way that feels different.

[Giannis Pappas]

In some way, he's just like, I'm so happy to be here. This is really awesome.

[Big J Okerson]

I thought it's gonna be a silhouette of his face on that wall.

[Giannis Pappas]

There we go.

[Big J Okerson]

Better, better, better.

[Giannis Pappas]

A little bit better. It was getting a little higher. This poor American Indian gentleman.

[Big J Okerson]

We. We have a great game for you guys today, everybody. So let's get our Story wars contestants up here right now. Lewis, you want to do the honors with our first guest?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yes, please. Ladies, you know him and love him. One of the funniest comics working in the country today. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the one and only Mike Foya.

[Mike Fenoia]

There he is.

[Big J Okerson]

Like, you see the middle there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody, our second contestant for Story Wars. You know him from the Are you garbage? Podcast and this half hour special on YouTube. How about it for the hilarious? He is Kevin Ryan.

[Giannis Pappas]

Are you garbage?

[Big J Okerson]

Are you garbage Kevin Head over here.

[Giannis Pappas]

There we go. Thank you, Jake, for putting your armpits in my face.

[Big J Okerson]

Now you're nailing it.

[Giannis Pappas]

And our last contestant on today's show, you know him from the Giannis Office Hour and his grandest special mom love available on YouTube. Pop it up for the one and only Yanis Papus. You played this game on Legion of Skanks a while ago. One of the originators. You loved the game. Giannis was so tickled by this game.

[Mike Fenoia]

This is gonna be huge.

[Big J Okerson]

It's gonna be huge, everybody. Story War is a very simple game. We will explain it for you. It's very simple to play. Seems very difficult to explain for some reason.

[Giannis Pappas]

Simplify, Simplify it.

[Big J Okerson]

Here we go.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're gonna get it.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm gonn.

[Giannis Pappas]

You got it. Who cares?

[Big J Okerson]

All five of us have submitted three to five stories on one subject. Today's subject, the law. All those stories have been submitted to Alex, our producer. She is going to read them off at random, one at a time. And if it is your story, you're the only person who knows that on the panel.

[Giannis Pappas]

That was the moment where it starts to fall apart. That was it right there. I'm just noticing, like there was a moment in the thing, the explanation where you lose confidence in it. The words get.

[Big J Okerson]

Now here we go. Locker. If it's your story, it's your job to make people think it's not. If it's not your story, it's your. It's your job to figure out whose story it is. You put your final answer on the whiteboard. Once you put it up on your stand, it's locked into place. If you fool people, it's one point per person you fool. If it's your story and it's two points if you guess the person. Right? Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Story Wars.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Who wants to be a Millionaire?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, wait, it's gotta be your bull.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, how do they explain more difficult games?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

$1.

[Mike Fenoia]

Well, you know, you guys smoked like three blunts before you came up here.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Then it's seven minute discussion on whether to smoke a blunt or a joint.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're gonna. There's gonna be a story. We're gonna pretend it's not our story. You get points for tricking people. You get points for guessing the correct story. That's that. We're gonna play Story Wars.

[Big J Okerson]

Wait, let me add, if I may. If you win tonight, you don't go home empty handed.

[Giannis Pappas]

Why would we do that?

[Big J Okerson]

That's not a game. It's not a game. Here you get. You're fighting for a book from the Story wars library.

[Mike Fenoia]

Oh.

[Big J Okerson]

Today's winner will be Rece. How to Build a Girl.

[Kevin Ryan]

Sweet.

[Big J Okerson]

A hilarious yet deeply moving coming of age novel by Caitlin moran. Wow. It's 1990. Joanna Morrigan, 14, has shamed herself so badly on local television that she decides there's no point in being Johanna anymore and reinvents herself as Dolly Wilde, fast talking, hard drinking, gothic hero and full time lady sex adventurer.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're giving that away.

[Big J Okerson]

That's.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're giving that away to ourselves.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Who signed off on that?

[Kevin Ryan]

Me.

[Big J Okerson]

And you were a couple of missteps away from fucking having us walk right out of our lives.

[Giannis Pappas]

Wow.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

It is our job to save. How to build a girl, Alex. I believe everybody understands. Who's gonna get it? Our first story, please.

[Alex]

Story number one. I have never served jury duty and I don't.

[Big J Okerson]

Wait, by the way.

[Giannis Pappas]

What?

[Big J Okerson]

This is me also. I definitely have done this, so maybe it is me. I did submit a while back.

[Giannis Pappas]

I did one time when I was younger.

[Big J Okerson]

You served it? Yeah, I went. I went before they told me I was wearing shorts so I could go home.

[Giannis Pappas]

You were also wearing a hood.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sir, you're 48. Take your chain wallet off.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not gonna put someone.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm not taking it all.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not gonna put someone's fate in your choir wallet.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You can't tell me what to do.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not on trial here.

[Kevin Ryan]

The people versus Hot Topic and our.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Star witness, Big Jay Okerson.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think he's 51 shareholder.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jake cannot not be biased against Goss.

[Big J Okerson]

Not knowing why.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Not knowing why because I feel if it was Lewis, he would for sure know why.

[Mike Fenoia]

You'd know why.

[Kevin Ryan]

You'd know.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Lewis would know why.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm running from it.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, I know why too. Yeah. Deacon dodge it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah. This to me. I don't know. I would do. I guess you're a little too over anxious.

[Mike Fenoia]

I feel like you're doing a nice deflection right now.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis is playing the game.

[Big J Okerson]

I know Giannis deflection but also I.

[Giannis Pappas]

Will say but anyway a little.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This game sucks. Can I vote I'm out of here.

[Giannis Pappas]

For everyone to pick up on? I typically what I've noticed is the first person trying to jump at coming to guess it ends up being them very often.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm so nervous.

[Mike Fenoia]

He just tried to take control of the whole narrative of everything.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't think it's loud.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think it's j. Look, everybody does this big thing. Let's just throw a name down and go to the next.

[Mike Fenoia]

I think it's you because before are you garbage hit. You had a lot of free time. So I think you're going. I don't know why Going like, dude, I'm unemployed.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Why not call. This is a good paycheck, dude.

[Giannis Pappas]

Have you. Have you served jury duty, Kevin?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I have no.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

Damning evidence. You haven't either.

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[Giannis Pappas]

Do you know why?

[Kevin Ryan]

I know why I have it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. No. Well, it seems like we have some interesting evidence.

[Mike Fenoia]

I think maybe the I don't know why means there's a drug conviction or assault.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, that would be my.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

They're like, this is why I never get called in for this.

[Mike Fenoia]

Say again?

[Big J Okerson]

They don't. The person doesn't realize there's a reason why they've never been called in because they've had some past.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right. So that's why the. I don't know why I'm going to this table.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Those two.

[Big J Okerson]

They know I would have written, I've never served jury duty. And I don't know why I have not got in trouble for it. Somehow I've gone through the raindrops. Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

And there could have been more to the sentence too. Right. Alex could have said.

[Mike Fenoia]

Are you trying to add on to the thing you wrote to make it more kind of very possible?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's definitely that table. Not this table. This is more of a college table. This is more of a. This is more of the table. We don't know why we haven't been asked.

[Giannis Pappas]

I was asleep on cr.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is suburb city. Suburbs.

[Mike Fenoia]

When I looked at your guys. Houses. I can't believe you live there.

[Big J Okerson]

Just so. Just so you know, Lewis said he did serve jury duty before, but that doesn't mean he actually did. He could be lying now. The story's got to be true. This could be butter horseshoe.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So he could just be saying he has done now.

[Giannis Pappas]

I feel like now that Giannis is onto this table.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Giannis isn't even. He's just shifting it to that side of the room, which is why.

[Big J Okerson]

Listen, it was a power move.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's Phenoya for sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

Maybe very quiet. He also specifically admitted that he's never sure of jury duty and he doesn't know why.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He just read the sentence back to them.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why. It could totally be me.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's like, I would understand why you would think that's me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah. No, I think it's because I emailed that in earlier today.

[Big J Okerson]

I want to go with Giannis. Giannis is on it tonight. I like his description of why it's probably Kevin, but.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm popping the cherry here.

[Giannis Pappas]

I. I mean, I. Sure.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, what?

[Giannis Pappas]

I have different strategies now. Bet on me. I think it's Jay.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm putting it down.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think it's Big J.

[Mike Fenoia]

All right.

[Big J Okerson]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's doing the strategy where he's taking the story.

[Big J Okerson]

That's aggressive. I'm going with.

[Mike Fenoia]

I think it's. I think it's a question. I think it's a question from the Nate Bargazi episode that got thrown in there by accident. Maybe it's Yank.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Well, it's also Jay. Jay and Lewis's stories would be like, I once got off for attempted murder of a hooker or whatever. We're like this. Yeah, this seems very like you're like, hey, tell us about your run ins with the wall. He's like, I've never served Jory.

[Giannis Pappas]

So you guys know the rule is once it's. Once it's in, you can't change it. That's it. Once it's. Once it's in there.

[Mike Fenoia]

Look at his posture.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He looks like I'm not on here anywhere.

[Mike Fenoia]

Look at this guilty posture right here.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He is. He's nervous. This dude buckles under pressure.

[Mike Fenoia]

He looks like Ari doing a special right now.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why, and I don't know why.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, I'm putting you.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jay, you cannot draw a Greek key around the entire.

[Big J Okerson]

What do you mean I can't.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's gonna take forever.

[Big J Okerson]

Whatever, man.

[Mike Fenoia]

Quick question. I don't know how to spell vanoia. If I spell it wrong, but it's him, do I still get it right?

[Giannis Pappas]

You get it right if it's him.

[Mike Fenoia]

So can I just put Mike?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, you just. Probably. Mike, the spinach works also.

[Giannis Pappas]

Everyone's got their answers in Alex.

[Alex]

That was Louis J.

[Kevin Ryan]

Going, whoa.

[Big J Okerson]

I said it.

[Mike Fenoia]

I had it right.

[Big J Okerson]

If nobody listened, I fully described it. Why it could be Lewis. Fucking lies.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, you saw it right at the end. He's like, all answers are in. Right? All answers are in. All right, we're good.

[Big J Okerson]

Everyone to lock in. Alex, He.

[Kevin Ryan]

Kevin, Ryan, Dust.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude, let's go.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hurry up.

[Big J Okerson]

Next time.

[Giannis Pappas]

You guys just got until you started.

[Kevin Ryan]

Started pointing out that it was Kevin. And then I'm like, no, it's you.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

For pointing it out. I thought it was me at one point.

[Big J Okerson]

If I had to be honest, Lewis is back here. Piece of. Just. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Never served. Not once. Don't know why. I have no idea. Don't know why. I haven't gotten in trouble for it. I've never gotten anything in the mail. They've never said. It's not like I've gotten and ignored it.

[Kevin Ryan]

That might just be your name. They're going through names and they're like, rob, It's Blue. It's Jacob. We don't want his opinion on this.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, I think they know they're good. They're like, he doesn't.

[Big J Okerson]

He doesn't got the thing.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Oh, yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And just like. I was like.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Just say you moved.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Or you just. I was just like. I mean, enough people probably went. They found him. Some people.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

No, you just go in there.

[Giannis Pappas]

But isn't it like an actual crime? Don't they say, like, you'd be arrested.

[Big J Okerson]

You have to go in, but you.

[Mike Fenoia]

Could get dismissed by just going, I'm racist.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I heard that's doesn't work. No, you really got to prove.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, you got to really.

[Big J Okerson]

You have to show some of your. Racist.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You got to put rough.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, it would. It would work for me. Trust me. I'll show up in blackface. Zig Hiling.

[Big J Okerson]

This is a video of me and my friend sitting on doorknobs of us.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's insane how emotionally invested I am in this already.

[Giannis Pappas]

I know that's why the game works.

[Kevin Ryan]

And the reason how to Build a.

[Giannis Pappas]

Girl, the reason it makes it a great podcast, is because everyone cares. Immediately, we really give a. Alex, let's go to the points, please.

[Alex]

I have Lewis in the lead with four points.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Wait, he drowns? Four points?

[Big J Okerson]

No, but Lewis fooled four people. One point, one person. He fooled all of us. He had a clean sweep.

[Giannis Pappas]

This God damn right. Starting right. That's right. You're coming home with me. How to Build a Girl.

[Big J Okerson]

It's a classic novel. You should have to look at the COVID Alex. Story number two.

[Alex]

Story number two. I once had a family member who is not a lawyer represent me in traffic court.

[Kevin Ryan]

You know. Wow, that's fucking great.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, that's as garbage as it gets. I mean, that I feel like this story was the premise for the show. Are you garbage? He's like, dude, I got this story. We can do something with it.

[Kevin Ryan]

There's something big here.

[Giannis Pappas]

It made me.

[Big J Okerson]

Made me want to say Kevin right away.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm already in my.

[Big J Okerson]

Already in. See, I was going to say possibly Giannis, though, because a Greek tight knit family, I've never been to court. I don't know why.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, I don't know why.

[Big J Okerson]

I've been to traffic court before, but.

[Giannis Pappas]

Dude, I. I was married. I currently have a ticket, a speeding ticket that I didn't get. I swear to God. I have not been pulled over for speeding since I've gotten my license.

[Kevin Ryan]

You get A picture in the mail?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, no, no, no.

[Giannis Pappas]

It was. They said it was an actual pullover. Showed their license. I called them out of it. They said it was in a different car. It wasn't in my Audi. Somebody, like, used my ID or my identity somehow. And they keep on just sending me a letter, and they keep on pushing the court date back a year. It's been like. It's already been over a year and a half. My court date is not for another year and a half. And I've just had this, like, day in court where I'm just waiting to go, hey, it's not me, guys.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I hope I serve on that jury. Guilty. That was on all accounts.

[Big J Okerson]

I got all this jury.

[Kevin Ryan]

I feel like that was a lot of deflection right there, that story.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know what, guys?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm lying.

[Giannis Pappas]

I got pulled over. I'm just trying to create an evidence trail for the judge.

[Mike Fenoia]

I think this is something Kevin would try.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I've never been arrested. I've never had any. Any court appearances. You could be lying right?

[Big J Okerson]

Right now.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's also very true.

[Kevin Ryan]

Host the podcast.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, you guys learned the hard way that you.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But who doesn't?

[Big J Okerson]

This doesn't seem like annoy to me at all. This isn't a. This isn't Connecticut people behavior.

[Kevin Ryan]

Well.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, I just don't believe that, Jay. Your family's not ballsy enough to do it. I don't think you're even ballsy enough to do matter.

[Big J Okerson]

By the time I would have had these issues, I was married to a lawyer.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, you would.

[Kevin Ryan]

The only person I think you would have had was like, mom, Mom.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, that's not true.

[Big J Okerson]

What do you mean?

[Giannis Pappas]

You were driving at, what, 16? You didn't get married to Carla until you were your, you know, mid-20s. So there's a whole. That lie, by the way, just now made me think it's Big J, because there's an eight year gap there that is unaccounted for.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Also, I don't know. You know who's very quiet? Giannis Papas. By the way, he got his guess up right away. Look, it's not me. Totally not me.

[Big J Okerson]

I only got his guess up right away when the store was red. I want to say I forgot this. I move on so quick in my brain, but I saw Giannis do this. When the story was read, he went.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Oh, they picked mine. Oh, wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

Wow.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

They called my. They called my joke crazy. He's sweating. He's got his brother standing next to him.

[Kevin Ryan]

What a lucky family to have that.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Your Honor, it was not Yana's papas.

[Mike Fenoia]

All you got to do is a quick wiki of me to know that's not me.

[Kevin Ryan]

What do you why that makes me think it's Giannis?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Oh, he's got.

[Big J Okerson]

What kind of reason is that?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He's got lawyers in his family, but they might have. Somebody might not have been a lawyer at the time, but had gone to law school and goes, I know I can run circles around this PO Judge.

[Mike Fenoia]

Or you're right. Or maybe I was so embarrassed that I had a, you know, prosecutor had to be prosecuted that I didn't tell them. And then I had to bring an estranged cousin to defend me.

[Giannis Pappas]

He even named some fat, dirty Greek being like, so you're.

[Big J Okerson]

You're picking him up with the thing. He's a good kid.

[Kevin Ryan]

Look at him. He's good family.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just some diner worker who shows up.

[Kevin Ryan]

Let the kid build a girl, huh?

[Big J Okerson]

You got the.

[Mike Fenoia]

Span of coconut.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He's out there with the waiters, writing.

[Giannis Pappas]

Down, Greeks are confident. Dude, I'm telling.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't know who in my family would be like, I can play a lawyer. They're all plumbers.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I feel like Giannis would represent himself.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Nobody in my family is voluntarily going to court. I can guarantee you that. No one's being like, oh, yeah, let's go to the place where they arrest us.

[Mike Fenoia]

Is there a chance.

[Giannis Pappas]

Damn it. I honestly only believe it can be Kevin on. I just. I. It could be Jay because of the way that he's acting, but I just don't believe that Jay would have the balls to have somebody.

[Big J Okerson]

How am I acting? The. Does that even mean my behavior is.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He's got a skull in his.

[Giannis Pappas]

How am I acting?

[Big J Okerson]

You. Excuse me.

[Giannis Pappas]

You created a false narrative that you were with a lawyer when you started driving. That was a weird thing to me.

[Big J Okerson]

I said by the time I'd be having. I didn't really have traffic court issues when I was 16.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now you're changing what you said all together.

[Big J Okerson]

I want to change everybody, but it's probably me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, you can't change.

[Giannis Pappas]

What would you change to?

[Mike Fenoia]

I would change it to Lewis.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, this could be back to back Lewis.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's all random, so it could be.

[Mike Fenoia]

Lewis is the guy, like, he just has ideas, and he's going like, just.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, put on a suit.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, let's just do it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It'll work. And we'll turn it into my Barry Lewis ide. I would.

[Giannis Pappas]

I would dress up as a lawyer like Ms. Douar. I'd run out of the courtroom, run back in. And then I'd forget to take my makeup off.

[Kevin Ryan]

Goes Luch.

[Mike Fenoia]

Goes.

[Big J Okerson]

Be my lawyer.

[Kevin Ryan]

And you can have a podcast on the guest.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Like, we'll turn this into a podcast. Get cameras and.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Justice is served. Coming. Real ass lawyer.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's a news. It's a new game show.

[Big J Okerson]

I say so.

[Mike Fenoia]

Can you convince the court that your.

[Kevin Ryan]

Family member is a lawyer?

[Big J Okerson]

If it's Giannis, Giannis might be a genius.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That was. Dude, that's a defensive.

[Big J Okerson]

No. Not just because of doing that. Not just because he didn't have to do it away. It's because then he argued about changing it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Oh, I think Yanis game. I think Giannis is playing chess. We're playing checkers. It's Giannis Papush.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, that hurts.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'll do you.

[Giannis Pappas]

It hurts because you just lost the point. I know you know that. Everyone's going, Giannis, Foya, say, Louis, you. No matter what the next story is, I'm voting piece of. Whoa.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, I thought you guys were my friends.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What the. You threw at this question.

[Mike Fenoia]

I never claimed to be your friend.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's not what your text messages said.

[Giannis Pappas]

What a show, folks. Alex Oliver. Votes are in.

[Big J Okerson]

Final answers are in.

[Alex]

Votes are in. That was Kevin Ryan.

[Mike Fenoia]

Oh, you piece of shit.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Let's go.

[Mike Fenoia]

I know a piece of shit when I know.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Shout out to Danny Ryan and associates for getting me off the pace.

[Mike Fenoia]

Look at this, look at this, look at this. I will never be fooled by a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Fucking peripheral Philly trash monkey in my entire life.

[Mike Fenoia]

A suburban South Jersey fucking Wawa hoagie Jersey.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's so offensive. He keeps taking Jersey.

[Mike Fenoia]

You and your Wawa twin are up to no good all the time.

[Giannis Pappas]

I called that out. I said, it's the most arguing garbage story. I'm an idiot. Why did I change my thought? What happened? Tell us.

[Big J Okerson]

One person guessed it all immediately, and the rest of us talk ourselves right out.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You all guessed it immediately. I was like, this game sucks. I was gonna walk out. You all know it was me. Immediately the crowd knew it was me.

[Big J Okerson]

I thought, no, I think the crowd was leaning Lewis.

[Kevin Ryan]

Dave Ryan is Ben Affleck and goodwill hunting. He's just like, retainer.

[Mike Fenoia]

I thought it was either Lewis or Kevin because they are idea guys, and they have, like, good ideas that are stupid ideas.

[Kevin Ryan]

Idea guys made me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It wasn't my idea. My brother was like, I'm gonna go with you. I'm like, oh, God.

[Big J Okerson]

I've been thinking about. I've been Thinking about getting into some amateur law.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Well, I do have to say he did get himself off a open container down the shore oneself.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Cuz he had Do a real pace in front of the jury, so.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Cuz he had a solo. He had a solo cup and a cop walked up on him and he dumped it. And then the cops, like, there was clearly alcohol in there and it was empty. And he goes, you can't prove nothing. And then not.

[Big J Okerson]

No, sorry, officer, you made a mistake. He go, you can't do.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He was right, cuz he went. He took it to court.

[Big J Okerson]

You can't record a smell.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He took it to court and the judge was just like, dude, what's it gonna take to get you out of here? And he's just like, give us 50 bucks. And he's like, all right, I'm outta here. 50 bucks. So he came. He was like, I got law experience. So he came.

[Kevin Ryan]

Wow, man.

[Big J Okerson]

He was undefeated so far. Giannis, you immediately knew Court part C.

[Mike Fenoia]

Uncle Donnie, I knew immediately. I know him well.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You had me dead to rights.

[Mike Fenoia]

I just knew.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But I was able to do a pretty good job fucking throwing it off. The.

[Big J Okerson]

Fantastic. Did you. And you got off the.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, I did not get off. I had to pay all the money that day when it was bullshit. They were putting everybody else on payment plans. The guy would be like, what do you have in front? What do you have on you today? And you know, this is. I mean, we were. This is a bad part of Philly. And they were like, I got like eight bucks. He's like, all right, put up five today. Put on a payment plan, like five bucks a month. And then I got up there with a lawyer, and he was like. He was like, how much money you have on you? I'm like, I don't know, like 80 bucks. He's like, all right, that'll do. And just fucking took. Took every dollar I had. He had just come off a job site. He had like, Tim's in like a. He did tuck his T shirt in, though. I gotta give him that.

[Kevin Ryan]

This whole court is out of order.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'll have this place.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can't handle the truth.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'll have this place flooded with plumbers in an hour.

[Giannis Pappas]

Fuck me, Alex. I mean, I know the points already, but why don't you share the points with our audience listeners at home?

[Alex]

All right, I have Big J and Mike Manoya with zero points.

[Giannis Pappas]

Points each.

[Alex]

Giannis with two points. Kevin with three points.

[Big J Okerson]

You have it listed wrong on the sheet. I'm sorry.

[Alex]

Oh, I'M sorry. Oh, you're right.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Oh, so you get two points if you guess it right?

[Big J Okerson]

Yep. Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Man, this game's awesome. I'm so locked in right now.

[Big J Okerson]

There's a. There's a surprise you have coming your way in the middle of this game.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, no, don't say I.

[Big J Okerson]

Don't say it. I just feel tension. I.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hey, hey, you can take your. All right, real quick, we got to talk about one of our brand new sponsors, which is Kalsheet, which is such a fun sponsor to have. Do you think you know who's going to win the presidential election? Jay?

[Big J Okerson]

What's it called?

[Giannis Pappas]

Kalshee.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no. What's the election called?

[Giannis Pappas]

Presidential.

[Big J Okerson]

There you go.

[Giannis Pappas]

Would you have bet that I could say the word presidential one time straight through without fumbling it?

[Big J Okerson]

Well, you blew it the first time.

[Giannis Pappas]

I know. Well, I got it the second time. Or how many seats the Democrats or Republicans will win in the House or Senate. There's finally a legal way to bet on the outcome of these elections on a platform called Cal. She has the first legal exchange where you can trade and bet on any event, including but not limited to elections.

[Big J Okerson]

Always bet on black.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's the first time you've ever been able to say that in conversation.

[Big J Okerson]

You've always wanted to always bet on black.

[Giannis Pappas]

Kelsey actually went to court and won legal approval for election betting for the.

[Big J Okerson]

First people that gave a shit about that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it's psychotic that that was even a thing. But there's markets on who will win the presidential election, who will control the House and Senate, who's going to win swing states and more. And they're already being used by hundreds of thousands of people and have facilitated close to $1 billion worth of trades.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude, this could be a problem for Dave Smith. Dave Smith could be like, what the. Like the northeast greatest bookie for this kind of shit. Oh, my God, dude, he's taking shit in constantly.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Sorry, guys. Election night's my night. He's got the flicking visor on.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it's who. What's his name? From Casino. He was based off a character that was really. Yeah, dude, that's Dave will be the ace.

[Big J Okerson]

Dave's Ace of Couch and Kamal are going at it. Who do you think is going to win? I say Trump and 2.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's 50. 50 right now. So you're going to double your money either way, no matter who you submission third round. That's not the way it works.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh.

[Giannis Pappas]

Put your money where your mouth is and give Kelsey a try. Sign up using our link kalsheet.com wars that's K A L S H I.com W A R Z Trump for more.

[Big J Okerson]

Than 60 yards on the ground.

[Giannis Pappas]

And the first 500 traders who deposit $100 will get a free $20 credit as well. That's kalshee.com wars for a $20 credit.

[Big J Okerson]

Put that on Kamala to take the single season record for home runs.

[Giannis Pappas]

All right, where were we?

[Big J Okerson]

Alex?

[Giannis Pappas]

Story number three.

[Alex]

Story number three. A cop car pulled up behind me, and over his speaker instructed a prostitute to walk away from my car. Jive away.

[Big J Okerson]

I can't see it. I heard prostitute. And then someone yelled, jay.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sorry.

[Mike Fenoia]

Cop car pulled up behind me and over his speaker instructed a prostitute to walk away from my car and for me to drive away.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's Lewis or Jay.

[Mike Fenoia]

Well, Jay didn't drive for a long time.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, no, he did.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And at that time, you would have had a lawyer to tell the cop.

[Big J Okerson]

Be like, hey, so you know, my husband always drove.

[Mike Fenoia]

You always drove.

[Big J Okerson]

Until I moved into the city, which was like, I thought when you were.

[Mike Fenoia]

Doing the clown gig, you were driven there because you didn't drive.

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Kevin Ryan]

Clown gig.

[Mike Fenoia]

What was it?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, the prostitutes.

[Kevin Ryan]

He drove the clowns.

[Big J Okerson]

I drove. No, no. I would also have to go be like a Barney the dinosaur.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You were in show biz your whole life?

[Big J Okerson]

Always.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's hard to drive with that.

[Big J Okerson]

I did. My mom worked at a Smalls formal wear, so I did tuxedo modeling at those things.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You got a fat kid in South Jersey? Come on in. Look how cute he looked.

[Big J Okerson]

My mom eventually got a job at Big and Tall to support my large clothes.

[Mike Fenoia]

Now, so the prostitute was by the window, meaning someone was soliciting the prostitute.

[Giannis Pappas]

Or.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Not to defend whoever this is.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, I was asking for direction.

[Giannis Pappas]

Or maybe the prostitute walked up to the car. The cop happened to catch him at that exact moment. And the guy wasn't really even trying to solicit the prostitute.

[Big J Okerson]

Maybe. Nice Other theory. Lewis.

[Kevin Ryan]

Second shooter.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I can't see this as phenoya. I don't know him to be a. To be a deviant like that.

[Mike Fenoia]

Now the cop pulled up.

[Big J Okerson]

Now I can say Fenoia one. Fenoia definitely had a dirty little bit of a grungier past for sure. Yeah, I. And then Lewis's. Lewis is currently living this life. Lewis's beautiful description of what this could be did open up the floor more. This doesn't also.

[Kevin Ryan]

This could just be circumstantial. Prostitute. You can't control what A prostitute.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This sounds like a case. This sounds like a case for Danny Ryan.

[Kevin Ryan]

You got prostitutes walking over.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't get paid until this prostitute goes to prison and you're off call.

[Kevin Ryan]

1-800-P-R O S T I T U.

[Big J Okerson]

T E leave it honestly quiet over there.

[Mike Fenoia]

Well, I'm just.

[Big J Okerson]

You grew up city, though, didn't you?

[Mike Fenoia]

I grew up in the city, but, yeah, that during my era, when I was growing up, this would be what would happen.

[Giannis Pappas]

This could happen.

[Mike Fenoia]

This could happen.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, this could happen.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah. But he wasn't driving to, like, Fort Lewis.

[Giannis Pappas]

Philly. Philly.

[Big J Okerson]

Were you from New Haven?

[Giannis Pappas]

No. That's a ghetto area. Do they have street walkers, though? No.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, but they're not used to back.

[Kevin Ryan]

In the day, but they would be honest.

[Big J Okerson]

Did you drive young?

[Mike Fenoia]

No. I mean, I'm just not gonna drive.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

To, like, 42nd Street.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, I didn't drive till I was.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, but, Yanis, you have a story about getting shot while you were in the car, though, so maybe you're being a little dishonest right now. Dishonest, Right.

[Big J Okerson]

You got shot in the car. You guys shot in the car because you didn't drive away when you were getting that prostitute. Classic.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's. It's not gonna be Mike because the cop is gonna assume Mike's a cop.

[Big J Okerson]

And he's very possible.

[Mike Fenoia]

He's just gonna get it under control. Oh, yeah, because the cop would have arrested Lewis and let the prostitute go.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Mike's definitely heard before I go, I'm on the job.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Don't worry.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got this.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I got her telling him. On the job.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Are you getting a prostitute?

[Kevin Ryan]

Go get me a medium regular. I think I'm locked in.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I feel like if it was Jay, you would have heard this at some point.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I just don't know.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You know what I mean?

[Giannis Pappas]

No. And I know Jay probably better than most. I do feel like this could be just a day at the office for Young Big.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It would have never, like, got a blip on the radar of, like, this is a story.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, this wasn't. It was just, like, literally, he remembered. He think about the law. He's like, oh, I remember at one time, I was talking to a hugger, and a cop almost caught me.

[Big J Okerson]

And I di.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The out.

[Giannis Pappas]

It was. There's nothing more to that story than that. Right?

[Kevin Ryan]

There's really nothing.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So.

[Big J Okerson]

And.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I can see Jay, back in the day, would solicit prostitutes. So I am.

[Big J Okerson]

Locked. Go straight. I'm already.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, man.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm Going right. I'm going for Noya on this one. Because I said, I think this could be based in a little more innocence than you think. Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Maybe he was telling the hooker, don't do it. You can buy him a life.

[Kevin Ryan]

I go, let me save you. I got. I'll pay for the loss.

[Big J Okerson]

What I see under there is a beautiful soul.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's like, I have a friend. You can be his lawyer.

[Mike Fenoia]

But Kevin is a guy who likes prostitutes.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm on to something.

[Big J Okerson]

Is that a thing?

[Giannis Pappas]

Who doesn't like prostitutes?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I gotta be honest. It's gonna sound like I'm lying. I don't like prostitutes.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't like them personally.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I totally don't like prostitutes.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're grimy. Obviously you don't like them. I like what they do.

[Big J Okerson]

He appreciates the work.

[Mike Fenoia]

What do you guys think? I got. I got. It's not Jay or Lewis. What do you think? Can I ask you?

[Big J Okerson]

I worry. I'm worried now.

[Giannis Pappas]

There are no rules.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right? So anyone got a hunch between these two dirt bags which one it is? Mike.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Damn.

[Kevin Ryan]

All right. I mean, hey, I'm going.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm worried now. I didn't pick.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm going. Slippery Kevin Ryan.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what I am.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What the do you think did?

[Big J Okerson]

No one guess. Lewis.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm an honest man here. Yanni.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, dude. Lewis gets another sweep.

[Giannis Pappas]

It'll probably. It'll be too. I'll pull far too far ahead if I get another sweep.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The whole.

[Mike Fenoia]

I don't like prostitutes. And then I saw in your eyes that you really like prostitutes.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, Yeah. I get.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's not me. I swear.

[Giannis Pappas]

Alex.

[Big J Okerson]

Everybody's locked in.

[Alex]

That was Big J ogre.

[Giannis Pappas]

I knew it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

God damn it.

[Mike Fenoia]

Too close to home.

[Big J Okerson]

Too.

[Mike Fenoia]

Too obvious.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sometimes it's right in front of you.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right in front of your face.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Pull your eyes apart and look around the room, will you?

[Kevin Ryan]

I got way too. I saw him light a cigarette during the story.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's pretty good.

[Big J Okerson]

But you have memories. She goes, yeah, she was something.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yep.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The one. It got away.

[Big J Okerson]

When I would drive home from. When I would drive home from New York at night when I was driving up with Kevin Hart and Keith Robinson.

[Giannis Pappas]

We would sometimes stop and get hookers.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, that's a different story. That's for the Keith episode. Yeah. It could be for a different time. No, that's.

[Giannis Pappas]

No.

[Big J Okerson]

But I would drop them off at Kevin's house segment and Brown at the time in Philly and go over the Ben Franklin Bridge and to stay awake because it's three, four in the morning at this point. Maybe later.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's hooker.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't know.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Just stay awake. No one's buying that.

[Big J Okerson]

It's like.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're like. It's like smelling.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sir, I'm just sleepy.

[Kevin Ryan]

I swear, if you walk through Camden.

[Big J Okerson]

You know this is not where you're going to get.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hooker is like smelling salts.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Two more hours in me. Let's go back to New York.

[Big J Okerson]

I think, Mike, I think I've driven you through. I get off the base of the Ben Franklin, and I would just take Broadway down.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And get back on the highway. Just.

[Giannis Pappas]

It sounds like you're explaining story words right now. It's a lot of different.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So I pull up to the light. I made a right. You guys know, right. The Sonoko right there. Good sandwiches after n. Cut to the chase.

[Mike Fenoia]

Were you. Were you trying to solicit a blowjob.

[Big J Okerson]

Or were you just. I would go down this pro, and when I stopped at a red light, a hooker started walking up to my car, and a cop was right behind me. And he goes, step away from the car, man. And, sir, drive forward. And she goes, this my cousin. And I was like.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Jay leaned back and like, it be. It be.

[Big J Okerson]

I rolled the window down. I was like, no, it's not. I put my white hand out the window to show them we're not cousins. And he goes, drive away. She goes, y'all crazy.

[Giannis Pappas]

Driveway pervert.

[Kevin Ryan]

There was no. No nail polish on that.

[Big J Okerson]

She definitely thought I was doing this to her.

[Giannis Pappas]

Sir, we know what you are here.

[Big J Okerson]

For, but she just made a red light. Took a shot for it. God bless her. Let's take a look at them scores, huh?

[Giannis Pappas]

What do you think she's doing now?

[Big J Okerson]

Dead.

[Mike Fenoia]

She's in law school right now.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

She's got a podcast on Gas Engine.

[Big J Okerson]

Street Stories Johnson.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's called we be cousins.

[Big J Okerson]

That's my cousin.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

All right, I'm up there.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Alex]

Right now, I have Mike Fenoya with zero points.

[Big J Okerson]

Don't you get points if someone votes for you? Huh?

[Mike Fenoia]

Don't I get points?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Stop trying to change the game for Noya, Mike.

[Mike Fenoia]

That's a Canadian rule.

[Big J Okerson]

Mike, I very succinctly describe the rules at the beginning.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

You don't pay attention.

[Kevin Ryan]

Advice.

[Alex]

I have Giannis and Big J with.

[Big J Okerson]

Two points each on the board.

[Alex]

Kevin Ryan with five points and Lewis with six points.

[Kevin Ryan]

Story Warrior, you came number there.

[Giannis Pappas]

Love it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Few more beers for me and my friends, huh?

[Giannis Pappas]

Where are we at, Story?

[Big J Okerson]

Story number four.

[Alex]

Story number four. Once, while in court facing charges I nervously called the female judge sir more than each time. Each time she was less forgiving and more pissed off.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This feels like Louis, dude, this.

[Big J Okerson]

This.

[Mike Fenoia]

If this probably happened recently, right?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Lewis almost answered.

[Mike Fenoia]

This is like 20 years ago. You've been like, I understand. You know, most judges are men. It's fine.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This feels like this has Lewis.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, I'll say the only reason I'm going to go hard in the paint on this and tell you it's not me. Usually when I play the game, I. I'll let you guys do what you guys want to do, but all vote for me. Whoever story. This is going to get a lot of points right now. And I'm just letting you know, it's definitely not me. It's Louis. I would understand you. I understand why you would think this made this story screams me, but it's definitely not me.

[Mike Fenoia]

Well, you're facing charges. There's that. That's the beginning.

[Giannis Pappas]

That is the big one. I did. How? I'm probably the only person on the panel that's face charges before.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, but you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm. I'm letting you know. But facing charges. Have ever been facing charges.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What is facing Char.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, you knew. Put the J.

[Big J Okerson]

You piece of.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm not. I'm not going to make you sound like a poet when you're a felon. There's no middle initial on the answer to this question.

[Big J Okerson]

There's no J there. There was no sir in that courtroom.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I got mine. How do you please, Ms. Louis J. Gomez.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm letting you guys know somebody is getting some points right now.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Trying to throw the scent off.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, you're trying too hard to deflect.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it might be Giannis.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm starting to think it's Yanis.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis was a fucking thug wigger back in his heyday, just so you know. He was. He was. That's what he was.

[Kevin Ryan]

Easy, man.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What do you mean, was? I thought you guys pairs of Jordans.

[Giannis Pappas]

You don't know the life before me.

[Big J Okerson]

Me and Giannis might be the only people who've had on stage scraps on this table. Yeah. Very possible to face charges for now.

[Giannis Pappas]

He might have been facing charges of Marisa at the time. He had a different life.

[Mike Fenoia]

That's a whole nother.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

There's no way Giannis comes from like, a. A plethora of learned lawyers and like, high learned lawyer, but I do. There's no way he's gonna go to court and they're gonna let him.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, Giannis was like a sneaker. Wigger when he was a kid.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I know, but his mom, like, his. His parents were.

[Mike Fenoia]

My mother was a human rights lawyer.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, they were very. I'm not going to jail.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's not gonna be me.

[Big J Okerson]

Wait.

[Kevin Ryan]

If it happened.

[Giannis Pappas]

But, Giannis, were you. You got into trouble as a kid, though.

[Mike Fenoia]

I did get into trouble.

[Giannis Pappas]

So just because he had a lawyer, that it's not saying he went to prison.

[Big J Okerson]

That's why we don't hear stories about him going to prison. Even after he called this lady sir. This lawyer multiple times.

[Kevin Ryan]

He could have called her sir as Maurice. And that makes it a little different.

[Giannis Pappas]

You guys are. Jay, I'm telling you, Jay, listen to me. I'm a story warrior through and through. I think it's Giannis, and Giannis about to rack up some points. So I'm picking yonder.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah. You think I'm someone who misgenders? Somebody like that? Like, I would do that.

[Big J Okerson]

God damn. It's Giannis.

[Mike Fenoia]

You think I would do that? That's the worst crime than whatever was happening for that person to be in that court. And I wouldn't have done that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, that's some feta on there. A little Kalamata.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

And that. Whatever that wacky.

[Mike Fenoia]

What's that soup.

[Big J Okerson]

They call it Greek.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is a beautiful place. I went last year.

[Big J Okerson]

Greece.

[Mike Fenoia]

Greek is a beautiful place.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, he just missed. He just misnamed that. It's Lewis.

[Big J Okerson]

Spanish is a pretty dope place, too.

[Giannis Pappas]

Alex. Answers are in you guys.

[Alex]

That was Mike.

[Mike Fenoia]

Oh, my God. That was racist. We just assumed it was you because you're Puerto Rican.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God.

[Giannis Pappas]

What charges were you facing?

[Big J Okerson]

Drugs, for sure. Getting caught with drugs.

[Kevin Ryan]

A lot of Grateful Dead I was on. I was in Maine.

[Giannis Pappas]

Of course you were in Maine, you white. Because I was on a fishing trip. You. Of course you were.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sir, we were being groovy.

[Kevin Ryan]

Surrender to the flow, Officer.

[Big J Okerson]

You were facing charges for selling grilled cheese in the parking lot in a NOS Gas lane.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got. I was charging to get my hacky sack stuck on the roof. No, I had possession of mushrooms.

[Big J Okerson]

Mushrooms.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I was in. Up at court in Maine, and the judge was talking, and I go, yes, sir. And this hillbilly in the back goes, he just called her sir. And the whole court started laughing. I got nervous again. I called her sir three times total, and each time more to the fine. Yeah, I was. I got a.5 years probation in Maine and a thousand dollar fine.

[Big J Okerson]

Wow.

[Mike Fenoia]

For calling her sir?

[Kevin Ryan]

No, for much mushrooms. There are a lot of mushrooms.

[Mike Fenoia]

What year was this?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He really snuck under the radar on that whole thing.

[Giannis Pappas]

1998.

[Mike Fenoia]

If that was 2019, it would attack.

[Giannis Pappas]

She's like, if you call me sir, call me sir one more time.

[Big J Okerson]

As a competitor, I feel like I should. All right, Mr. All right, dude, I've made the mistake you've made before. I throw down a heavy guess, commit hard right away. It's also the funniest way to do it. For sure. But every time I've done it, it's wrong. And don't just cram it in there.

[Giannis Pappas]

Every time you get excited, you throw the guests out, and then it's too late.

[Big J Okerson]

Sometimes you're right. By the way, Kevin Ryan worked so good.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

You're like, it's my move now.

[Mike Fenoia]

That was my move. And now it's not my move.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's a move.

[Giannis Pappas]

Mike Fenoya was. I mean, there was no chance he was going to win.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He was so quiet.

[Giannis Pappas]

What is happening right now?

[Big J Okerson]

Nobody's got a nice sweep there.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's great.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm ready to build it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's a big turn.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just a huge.

[Mike Fenoia]

But in my defense, everyone was looking at Lewis.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's my story. And I even believe nobody got it right.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Facing charges. I've never really faced charges. I've never had to go to court. I've been arrested in New York City.

[Kevin Ryan]

Terrifying.

[Giannis Pappas]

Taken to, like, the tombs. Had to see a judge, but that was always, like, in and out like, that. I was never, like, having to come back to court and face.

[Kevin Ryan]

There were kids in chains and orange jumper things in the court. And I was like, that's me.

[Giannis Pappas]

Soon.

[Big J Okerson]

This is it. I've never faced, like. Yeah. Any kind of, like, time or anything where it's like, even, like, you're.

[Giannis Pappas]

You'd have to join money. Would have to join the Aryan Brotherhood.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, totally in a minute, dude.

[Giannis Pappas]

He got a swastika tattoo on his.

[Kevin Ryan]

Stomach next to my fish tattoo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Alex, let's go over our points.

[Alex]

All right, the scores right now. I have Big J and Giannis with two points each. Mike Fenoy with four points, Kevin Ryan with five points, and Lewis with six.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Okay, points.

[Giannis Pappas]

First place, baby boys. Let's go. Wow.

[Big J Okerson]

Man.

[Giannis Pappas]

Here it is. Let's go over everyone's plugs and dates and all that stuff.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Let's go over everybody's plugs and taste Mr. Papa.

[Mike Fenoia]

Oh. All right. Listen to my podcast, the Giannis Pappas Tower, and catch me on the road in Pasadena and Brea and Portland, Maine. And don't get mushrooms. Don't get mushrooms. In Portland, Maine. And I can't pull up the rest of them.

[Big J Okerson]

Go to my website.

[Kevin Ryan]

Giannispaskami.com got a bunch of dates coming up. Providence, Jersey, Nashville, Bloomington, bunch of stuff. Mikefenoya.com for dates.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Thanks.

[Giannis Pappas]

Kevin.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Check out the Are you garbage? Podcast. Wherever you get podcasts, shout out to the army of garbage. And then we're off the road for a little bit. But we're doing Are you garbage and friends, which we've done, we're doing in New York November 8th and then Philly sold out already. Then we're doing one. I don't think it's announced yet. Stanford, Connecticut on November 22nd. Get those tickets. We play YG. We bring up, you know, some of our funniest friends and play ayg. It's a good time. Check it out.

[Big J Okerson]

Big J Comedy. I'm all over the road. Look for a city near you again, bigj comedy.com some important ones coming up. I have Thanksgiving. Mikey's gonna be with me actually in Philadelphia, which we're also going to be doing a lot of story wars that week. Thanksgiving weekend, Wednesday night, Friday night, Saturday night. And Wednesday night we batted a late show, which is going to be a story wars in Philly. So get tickets for that asap. That is going to fucking sell out for sure. And yeah, I have Austin mothership. Bunch of stuff coming up. Really fun. Boston, Wilbur. Look for a senior here. You listen to the Bonfire with me and Robert Kelly five days a week on Faction Talk series 6 and 103.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Legion of Skanks, yo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Legion of Skanks. The rags. The brand new Lewis and Zach show. Go subscribe to our new YouTube channel. We changed the real ass podcast. The new Lewis and Zach show. All available on Guest digital. Come see me on the road coming up. I got Baltimore next weekend, October 24th through 26th. And I got Washington. It's multimedia. I got Washington D.C. on October 27th. And then I got, I got Toronto's coming up in November. I got some other place. Go to LewisOfSkanks.com grab those tickets. Subscribe to Gas Digital. You get this podcast uncensored and ad free and the on demand library all in one place. Plus all the other podcasts use the promo code war and you get the pre release of this show comes out every Monday night on gasdigital.com before it goes anywhere else. So yeah, that's that.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, there's no exception down here.

[Big J Okerson]

We now enter the second half of the game. And now Giannis, I know we played this game on Legion of Skanks. We hadn't really sorted it out with the game system was going to be and all the do dads and ins and outs. But I will tell you that even though you and I sit low on the board with two points only, it's almost impossible.

[Giannis Pappas]

I feel like you guys can't come back.

[Big J Okerson]

Things get kicked up a notch. That's because for the final four stories. Double points.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Are you kidding me?

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Double points.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

The people have spoken and they love double points.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Just when I thought it couldn't get any crazier.

[Kevin Ryan]

You go and do double points now.

[Mike Fenoia]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's very strange when you guess the right answer. It's four points now. It's a psychotic number. But that's okay.

[Big J Okerson]

It's crazy. Why? It's crazy. A full sweep could be eight full points. That's game changing or game ending early.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I want to know how long the conversation was to make this decision.

[Big J Okerson]

So many meetings were so many. Alex was doing math at home to see if things worked out different. If we did it this and that. We've. We've landed on. I don't know, man. But people love double.

[Giannis Pappas]

The team. The team had to buy a graphing calculator in order to figure out just.

[Kevin Ryan]

Grab my ashes on them.

[Big J Okerson]

That we're still quite not sure if it changes things at all or makes them more convoluted or nonsensical. God damn.

[Giannis Pappas]

Do people love anybody's game?

[Big J Okerson]

Anybody's game right now.

[Giannis Pappas]

Story number five, Alex.

[Alex]

Story number five. I was once asked to help a friend escape.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Sorry.

[Kevin Ryan]

Once asked to help a friend escape.

[Big J Okerson]

Chris sounds like me or Kevin. It sounds very Philly.

[Giannis Pappas]

Why?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What? It's not me. That's.

[Mike Fenoia]

I don't think it's Lewis because it was. He was only asked once.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Lewis would have tried it.

[Mike Fenoia]

I think Lewis would have been asked.

[Giannis Pappas]

To this day, I feel like I could escape prison.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I know that. See, that's what I'm saying. If I.

[Giannis Pappas]

There was that movie with Sylvester Stallone where he would go in and get like, that's my dream job, dude. Yeah. Escape plan, dude. You know, I wash it on a flight. And then I was so into escape. I was like, this movie rules. And the flight landed and I never saw the ending. And I don't know what happens at the end. To this day, I have no idea.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The last 20 minutes he gets another 10 years.

[Big J Okerson]

There is so many plane movies where I'm like. Was enjoying it on the plane, but not even worth the next last 15 minutes worth.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was written by Tulsa King Merch.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's a good. They give you, like, episodes one, two, and three.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's.

[Big J Okerson]

All right.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Shout out to Delta.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm gonna move to Tulsa.

[Big J Okerson]

Tulsa King rules. I was once asked, who know who has a friend in prison?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I have had a friend in prison.

[Mike Fenoia]

I've had a friend in prison.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think it's Yanis, because I think people trust you. You're smart.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I think, like, someone's, like, who can I get to break me out of prison? Giannis can figure it out.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I gotta go with Lewis on this one, though. You gotta have a friend dumb enough to be like, get me out.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, so look, look, I will say that I would be the friend you're.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

If I got in prison. You're getting a letter encrypted where the first letter of every word is the.

[Big J Okerson]

Only person I know who can fit a nail file up their ass.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Put that gun back up your butt.

[Giannis Pappas]

Look, if I had a friend in prison, I'm trying to break him out. I'll tell you, he's gonna ask me. All right, I'm showing up. I'm tying a rope to the bars on the window.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But it also. It also goes to show who your friends are, because it's like, all right, most people have had friends that have probably got locked up, I assume. And so we weren't all fucking prisons.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't know if I have prisons.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I got it. But I had a. I had a.

[Giannis Pappas]

Buddy, so it's on this side of the table.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I had a buddy.

[Big J Okerson]

Yes. For what?

[Kevin Ryan]

Stabbed a guy. Self defense, but stabbed the guy.

[Big J Okerson]

Was it, though?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It was at a fish.

[Giannis Pappas]

He was on mushrooms.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. What happened? Did somebody. Harsh as mellow.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, he accidentally. It was involuntary manslaughter.

[Big J Okerson]

With the glows, he's like, whoa, man, that's.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's my banana cream pie.

[Big J Okerson]

Yo, man, get your hand off my pies. That's my whole livelihood. I like these wacky shoelaces. Different colored marks.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Giannis is pretty quiet.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, I'm pretty quiet because I'm thinking.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm just thinking that's a bad excuse.

[Giannis Pappas]

But Yan is not defensive just now. That was a strange.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm thinking.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis is melting down right now. Now he's calming himself down.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Dude, not once has Giannis. I've podcast with Giannis a million times.

[Giannis Pappas]

Not once.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He ever been like, I'm thinking. I'm thinking, that guy. That guy just reacts.

[Mike Fenoia]

Do you think any. First of all, you think I would ever know someone who is in prison.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You just said you know you've been shot before.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude.

[Giannis Pappas]

You just said you knew somebody in prison.

[Big J Okerson]

You don't up now, dog.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Y'all don't up now.

[Big J Okerson]

This is finally gonna work. I've never written this name so many times.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's never been right.

[Mike Fenoia]

But this.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Okay, hold on. This does sound like a. Some sort of hippie would try this. That's friends with Fenoa. That's true. Like, dude, just. Just get me out of here, man.

[Big J Okerson]

God damn it. I heard that argument. You know what?

[Giannis Pappas]

I remember my banana cream pie. Check this out, man.

[Big J Okerson]

And now Mike jumped on Giannis so fast.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, yeah. I'm looking.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Mike's nervous. Already proved he's had rule number one of Danny Ryan's.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike's already proved he's had a history in courthouses. He's been in court, been arrested. One of his friends probably got arrested.

[Giannis Pappas]

Can I play devil's advocate?

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

The topic is the law.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Kevin Ryan]

I gave you, I think. Where'd you go to college?

[Mike Fenoia]

American.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Oh, he's reflecting. It's Fenoia locking in. That's my final answer.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis got his.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's not me. Giannis. Don't put it up there. It's not me. Yanni, I'm telling you right now, you have my word as a friend. Which you said we weren't.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's not the.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis keeps on voting for Kevin Ryan. We keep on voting for Giannis. It's always for Noya for some reason.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I got him dead the rights right now.

[Mike Fenoia]

I just feel like this sounds like a very Philly kind of.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I grew up in the suburbs. It's like I was in North.

[Giannis Pappas]

Guys, there's no more. All of our answers are final at this point. We don't have to be about it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Who wants to probably break out?

[Big J Okerson]

Alex?

[Alex]

You guys, that was eight. Clean sweep for Big J over.

[Mike Fenoia]

You talking so much. You threw us all off.

[Giannis Pappas]

Who?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You would never fit through the H vac fence.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God. No.

[Kevin Ryan]

They wanted him to, like, tie against the wall and run.

[Big J Okerson]

So.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Damn.

[Big J Okerson]

My friend. My friend, my.

[Kevin Ryan]

My friend never heard this story.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jay, will you Kool Aid man through this wall of the prison.

[Big J Okerson]

It's almost as funny as that. The guy was a lunatic. So it was my friend Little J. Why I'm called Big J? Because it was Big J and Little J. And I was so big, by the way. Little J wasn't little. He was 6 foot tall, buck 90. But it was just. He was Little J. And one day, we just all got hit with the. With the life. Life decision that we didn't choose that his brother got out of jail, and he's a lunatic who went to jail for Philly Robin Wawa.

[Kevin Ryan]

Horrible pride.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, yeah. And then he committed a bunch of crimes locally when he got out in South Jersey. And then when he was gonna get sent back, his mother was gonna get him out of town. This is how crazy his family was. They were gonna get him out of town by sending him to Florida to live with family. But they sent him to an aunt's house first in Roxboro, Pennsylvania. He was there for one night before his flight the next day. Robbed a Wawa, got arrested, went to jail. Found out a couple things that day. One, he's bald and has been wearing wigs the entire time.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Who is he? One of them Inez brothers.

[Big J Okerson]

He wore full long. Ha. He went to jail in the 80s, came out in the 90s. He was still like. So he got. He had, like, Bon Jovi hair.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He was like, Joe Dirt, buddy.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm such a dummy. One day he would have Bon Jovi hair. The next day he would have, like, Elvira or, like, you know, like. Like. Like Munster. Lily Munster hair. And I'd be like, dude, this guy is cool. As. I was like, I don't know how he takes all that time. And then he had the white streaks to one day and then back to Bon Jovi Brown. Never knew. We go into jail, and we're sitting there, and he's. Me. And my friend Glenn went. Who's also chubby. And then we went there to laugh because the guy is a lunatic. So we were going like, oh, it'll give us funny stuff to laugh at. Whatever crazy he says that's going on in there, because he's nuts. And we sat down, and he goes, guys, I'm glad you came. And this is a full contact. Like, we're sitting on a bench with him inside a place with armed guards at. At both entrances from us and the prisoners. And he's like, guys, and he's not kidding. He goes, I got a plan. You guys are gonna get me the out of here today.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You don't have time to think about it. Just react.

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[Big J Okerson]

He goes. I swear you.

[Giannis Pappas]

He goes, today is a great plan. It's like, we're not. You don't need any more planning, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I got it all right now, by the way, I'm giving you w.

[Kevin Ryan]

One chance to break me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

We don't need to workshop this thing. I Got it ironed out.

[Big J Okerson]

This guy had no idea we were. I have the perfect plan to say that. When he didn't know we were coming until we got there, the first thing he tells us, he goes, oh, thank God you two came. Of all the people. Yeah, it's a group of seven friends. Could have any one of us. I'm glad you guys came. I got a plan. He goes, jay, you're going to take out that guard. Take out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Amazing, dude. It's yard football. He goes, yo, you're going to run, fake up, twisted ankle, turn right at.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The garbage, crawling on his hand.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I'm gonna go, Statue of Liberty, kick the ball out of my hand.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Jay's over there talking to the guards. Have you ever a black guy or whatever?

[Big J Okerson]

I am a black guy. It doesn't work.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Quick, distract that guy. How long you guys been dating?

[Kevin Ryan]

Have you ever seen Asian pubes, Officer?

[Big J Okerson]

This is where.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This is where.

[Big J Okerson]

This is a quote, verbatim, front to back. He goes, jay, you're gonna take out that guard. You're gonna take out that card. I'm gonna use my Go Go Gadget legs to get over the wall. And here's the best part. I'm gonna use my Go Go gadgets to get out of the wall. He was saying right here. Do these two things. We're in a low ceiling roofed room, visiting room. He's like, I'll use my. That's what I'm saying. He wasn't kidding. But we just had to be like, nah, man, it's not gonna work today for us.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'll pull you back tomorrow.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. He goes, yeah, I think we gave him, like, a listen. We just got to think this out a little better. That's not going to work. I don't.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't have the right shoes on.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

Because look, I got.

[Big J Okerson]

You're right. We should definitely help you escape.

[Giannis Pappas]

So not only was it the plan today, the plan was right now in this room.

[Big J Okerson]

And I guess he wasn't worried about Congratulations. Propelling him through a concrete ceiling.

[Giannis Pappas]

I have to put the plan right now. Turn around and hit that car.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You might even hit him. Take him out. You might have the skills. You might just take him out. And then what? Were you gonna walk out the front door?

[Big J Okerson]

Can I tell you why? It's why he meant it. It wasn't when he said it. When he said it, he could have eventually, when we said no, been like, of course, dude, it's. I'm kidding. He went like this. We were like, yeah, dude, we can't do that. And he. I guess he went.

[Kevin Ryan]

He goes, I gotta do it myself. Go go Gadget leg.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't even know why you.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude. What a dumbass.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I think that guy would have been.

[Mike Fenoia]

Able to do it because the guards would have maybe been so taken aback that you tried it in that room.

[Big J Okerson]

Let me tell you. But I'll tell you what was appreciated.

[Mike Fenoia]

They would have just appreciated, like, the. The dreaming, like, this guy's dream.

[Big J Okerson]

What if I went up to him, he goes, dude, he goes, if you don't mind. He goes, I'm not doing anything. I'm just gonna grab both your shoulders for a second, and my friend here is gonna try to jump out of a roofed wall. If you wouldn't mind, just like. Just play along and, like, he'll tire himself out.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah. Oh, my God, there's a ceiling here. I forgot.

[Big J Okerson]

My favorite thing about this guy that I always loved was we all. You know, when he came home from prison, he was definitely a talking point. Every day, everyone was like, how can we do something and avoid bringing this guy? But Little J has that weird dynamic with his family. He called his mother mother, his father father, and his brother brother. Not in a weird rich kid way, just a weird fucking, no one gives a fuck kind of way. But everyone adopted that to his parents. So you called his mother mother also because Father, father. But when his brother came home and we called him brother because he dressed like a heavy metal guy, we used to exclusively call him brother. And I mean, that was so fun in the sense that you'd be like. He goes, yeah, dude. He goes, look. Yeah, we could definitely hang out and watch the game tonight, but if you get a voice, bring him brother. It's like, my parents are home. He's going to say something weird, and it's just like, could you avoid it?

[Kevin Ryan]

The Wawa had a sign that said zero days. And Richie Samora slash John Stamos tried.

[Big J Okerson]

To rob us one day. I tell you the story of his. Of his court case. It was awesome.

[Giannis Pappas]

Alex, let's go to the. The points right now. Where we at?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's a big swing on that one.

[Mike Fenoia]

Big J.

[Giannis Pappas]

Big J. Take.

[Alex]

On the scoreboard. I have Giannis Papus with two points.

[Mike Fenoia]

Points.

[Alex]

I have.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Be honest, you stink.

[Alex]

I have Mike with four points, Kevin with five points, Lewis with six points, and Big J.

[Mike Fenoia]

That was big, dude.

[Giannis Pappas]

Huge, huge deal for Big J.

[Kevin Ryan]

Double points.

[Big J Okerson]

Double points is huge.

[Giannis Pappas]

Anybody's game still, by the way, guys, we still have three stories left. It's anybody's game.

[Big J Okerson]

Anybody's game.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Here comes anybody's game.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, anybody's. Now that we're double points.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let'S take a quick moment to thank one of our incredible sponsors, which is IP Vanish. They make it really easy to hide what you're doing on the Internet, which.

[Big J Okerson]

Our audience ever needed. One thing. Yeah, we were hawking.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, you don't want people to know what you're looking at. I don't want to know what you're looking at. Honestly. Don't tell me.

[Big J Okerson]

Remember how many times you've typed in just the first parts of the words or. Or in this state and you can't do that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jay.

[Big J Okerson]

What?

[Giannis Pappas]

Jay, we're gonna have to edit that out. That's crazy. You can't encourage these people to look up.

[Big J Okerson]

Why would you need your IP to vent?

[Giannis Pappas]

But I mean if they wanted to, IP Vanish would be the website that they could use. We can't tell them to do that though.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm not saying do it. If you do it. I just know in the, in this, in the court of Big J, you're a deplorable piece. I'm just letting you know.

[Giannis Pappas]

What are you doing?

[Big J Okerson]

Probably walk scot free. I'll never even know.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm just trying to say maybe you have. This is for people that have maybe websites blocked at work or something like that.

[Mike Fenoia]

Sure, sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

Sorry. There was a chair moving.

[Big J Okerson]

Is that an airplane?

[Giannis Pappas]

Look, we are just kidding. Don't do anything illegal. But you do want to get around online sensors that you might face sometimes. Sometimes you're in public WI fi and you can't go to certain websites. Sometimes you're trying to check off in the airport.

[Big J Okerson]

Man.

[Giannis Pappas]

IP bandage has you got.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm trying to whack off in my car using the WI fi from my kids daycare before I pick them up.

[Giannis Pappas]

They also offer.

[Big J Okerson]

You tell me. Watch me grow. Children's learning center has fucking blocked wi fi. My 2 year old's not gonna look up porn.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, this is story words, not Legion of Skanks. What are we doing?

[Big J Okerson]

No, this is ipv. This is what they want you guys to know. This solves. You don't have to have these conversations with anybody.

[Giannis Pappas]

Listen to me. They also offer secure file management so you can back up and encrypt all of your files. You creep.

[Big J Okerson]

Their motto right here. It's the promo code. Wink wink, look.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right now just go to ipvanish.com they have different packages with affordable pricing and if you use the promo code with a Z, W a R Z, they're gonna give you an extra 10% off. This is the time to sign up. And with our discount and their current promotional offerings, you can get a VPN for about 85% off what they're usually offering.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm telling you, once you get IP vanish. Once you find out you're officially on IPVanish. Whatever crazy plan you have, start planning it.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can start breathing free.

[Big J Okerson]

Breathe easy. Why not? Dude, I just call that the web at this point.

[Giannis Pappas]

You are alive. You are part of the IP Vanish universe.

[Big J Okerson]

I will not buy a. But I'd like to browse a website where I could.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a great way to put it. All right, let's get back into it.

[Alex]

All right, story number six. In college, I got caught drinking with a fake id. I panicked and snitched on my older friend who got me the id. He later hooked up with my ex.

[Big J Okerson]

Who I was still in love with.

[Kevin Ryan]

Oh, wow.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Few things right off the bat that Lewis and Jay never been to college.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no, no. I went for a month, so I would say. But I would say I didn't go. That was a dream. That was a fever dream. Came the county community dog, 13th grade. Lewis did go to college.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike Fino is always breaking the law around drugs. Yep, in other states.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

And he panics. He panics when there's authority figures around. He gets all weird.

[Kevin Ryan]

This is like a log line from like Stifler's mom too.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Look at this. It's one of them too, for sure.

[Big J Okerson]

Where'd you go to college?

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, I can see it being Kevin Ryan as well. He quickly just threw it.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, yeah. Threw to me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm no snitch, dude. You should know that about me. Temple University. Go Owls.

[Big J Okerson]

But here's the thing. There's no campus where you're drinking a temple. It's completely a terrible, horrible age Shot to Philadelphia.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but go to banners with a fake id.

[Mike Fenoia]

But it's got to be like a slow college town for them to be. Where did I go to College?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Washington, D.C. washington, D.C. yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Campus. It was a campus, like dorms and everyone.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's not those two.

[Giannis Pappas]

I went to community college for a year, then I went to Baruch College.

[Mike Fenoia]

You're deflecting right now. It's gonna happen.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Lewis isn't gonna play.

[Big J Okerson]

Because I will agree. This doesn't necessarily.

[Kevin Ryan]

That just means the years you were.

[Big J Okerson]

In college, you were away at college. Absolutely.

[Giannis Pappas]

Sure bet on me.

[Big J Okerson]

Fine.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, Lewis is no snitch.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Listen, I don't like the guy. But he's no snitch.

[Giannis Pappas]

Listen to me.

[Kevin Ryan]

Or this could have been.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm not gonna try to convince you that it's not me. But I just. I'm gonna let you know that I never had a fake id. I didn't give a shit about how.

[Big J Okerson]

To put a fake id.

[Giannis Pappas]

I didn't really start drinking until I was close to 21 years old. It was like five times.

[Big J Okerson]

Ever drink before this could be a stupid move.

[Mike Fenoia]

Whoever it was panicked and said probably thought, oh, my older friend bought it, meaning it was legal. So it might not have been a snitch. And that's why I think it was Louis.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It sounds like snitch ass shit to me.

[Big J Okerson]

Sounds like some snitch ass shit.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Use your go go Jack Gadget legs to get the out of here, Giannis.

[Giannis Pappas]

All right, it's 100 on that side of the table.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I give you my word.

[Kevin Ryan]

Makes me think it's on that side.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, that makes me think.

[Giannis Pappas]

Kevin gave me his word.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So I haven't lied in this yet.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't see.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Except that time I lied.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't think Giannis.

[Big J Okerson]

And I don't want to play the.

[Giannis Pappas]

Numbers game because it doesn't really mean anything. And I don't know how odds work.

[Big J Okerson]

But I don't think Giannis has had.

[Giannis Pappas]

A story yet either.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, but it's.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

How random is she picking the randomness.

[Mike Fenoia]

Or is it random?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's randomized.

[Giannis Pappas]

Randomly generated.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike Finoa's had one. You've only had one.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think.

[Giannis Pappas]

Can't you spell it? You can't say it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Just call me Mike. Your name sounds like. I don't know.

[Giannis Pappas]

You have the hardest name to say, and you can't.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike Fenoya.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I think it's Gary.

[Big J Okerson]

You're getting the wrong one hard.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, Foley did it.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm going.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike Fenoya.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, listen, it's for New Year. Yeah, we gotta. We gotta. We gotta get the points here.

[Giannis Pappas]

Kevin is taking advantage of my stupidity and he's manipulating me right now.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm locking.

[Giannis Pappas]

Gaslighting.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Listen, I got caught. I got caught one time with a fake id. It was a good fake id. It was in New York. It was my picture. Used to do the bend test. I don't know if you guys remember that. Back in the day, it. It bent. It did the whole thing. But it got taken in Atlantic City when I was drinking with Cece Deville for boys.

[Big J Okerson]

What? Yeah. Crazy.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You guys next story wars. We'll get into it next.

[Giannis Pappas]

The Next thing with story was times you party with rock stars.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's the only story party. He's sober. What?

[Big J Okerson]

That's a wild.

[Giannis Pappas]

Like, you should do a show called all you garbage.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He tried to get my ID back, and they wouldn't give it to him. That's the only time I ever got called.

[Big J Okerson]

When you're back to CC Deville.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What?

[Big J Okerson]

It wouldn't give your ID.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

CC's like, hey, he's a friend of mine. And they were like, no.

[Giannis Pappas]

If you guys know C.C. deville's voice from Please. Got a very, like, really raspy voice. But it was one of the hardest I've ever laughed. It was like when I was really. I was maybe a year in comedy, and you and Metzger, me and maybe Nate were in the car. And there's the Poison song where the lyrics, Michaels goes, cece, pick up that guitar and talk to me. Then you occur at the same time. I knew my pants laughing in that moment because I wasn't expecting. I'm assuming it was a classic gag between you guys, but I nearly shit my pants laughing. Oh, fuck. It made me laugh. All right, so. So fanoia picking me also, I kind of feel like that's telling. I feel like he. There's obvious. This is obviously not me. So picking me means that he's not putting any thought into it. He's just trying to get a vote on the board. He's getting nervous.

[Kevin Ryan]

Nope, nope, nope.

[Giannis Pappas]

You would say that. You would say that.

[Kevin Ryan]

I 1 million think it's you because you are someone that would still be in love with an act a lot.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yep. That's it.

[Big J Okerson]

Guilty. J. Son of a mess.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm trying to move on. Okay.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm going Louis with Giannis. God damn it. This is gonna pay off eventually.

[Kevin Ryan]

One of these days, it's gonna be honest.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think it's Foy. No.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm no snitch.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is it a familiar Giannis, in my opinion.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Anybody guess, mate?

[Giannis Pappas]

No.

[Mike Fenoia]

No.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, no. Oh, no.

[Big J Okerson]

Come on.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Just checking double points, Alex.

[Alex]

You guys, that was yawning.

[Mike Fenoia]

I deserved it. When he hooked up with my ex, I deserved it. I panicked. I thought he was 21. So they were like, where'd you get the alcohol? And I was like, he bought it. And then my friend was like, what the are you doing? That's me giving alcohol to a minor. We got off. But a couple years later, he my ex.

[Big J Okerson]

Did you give at the time, were you devastated by that?

[Mike Fenoia]

No, at the time, I go, oh, I remember a couple years ago. This is what. I deserve that. Yeah, I deserve that.

[Kevin Ryan]

Still in love with. Definitely made me think it was you.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

But I'm not a lover. That's not true. I don't know. I don't stay in love with exes. Once I'm out, I'm out. They're in love with me.

[Big J Okerson]

Story wars. I love Lauren. Oh, let's check this cool cop, though.

[Mike Fenoia]

He let us off. I think he saw what I did and was like, that's punishment enough. Between your friendship. You guys are gonna.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, I'm just gonna give you fair warning. This guy's going to your ex girlfriend.

[Kevin Ryan]

He's going to do much worse than any judge is going to put on.

[Mike Fenoia]

Or was I right to snitch on him because he's the type of guy that would an ex girl.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, not at all. You snitched.

[Big J Okerson]

It's a little card before the horse.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But do you remember that guy? I don't care. You're awesome. Y. I love you. He sucks.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude. You over that guy who totally your ex girlfriend you were still in love with.

[Kevin Ryan]

Do you remember your fake ID name?

[Mike Fenoia]

It was some like Czech name. It was like. Yeah, it was like Malaka Volsanisnis. It had like squiggly lines over letters. It was like a tote. It was a foreign exchange student.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What's up? I'm Yanis and I took a picture.

[Mike Fenoia]

I took a picture of me and like a passport photo and put it in the plastic. So the plastic was like still open. So it's just a pic.

[Big J Okerson]

The guy just don't let it leak out.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, it was just open.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Open.

[Mike Fenoia]

Wasn't a good. Wasn't a good.

[Big J Okerson]

Fit the scoreboard, please, because this game has just been upended.

[Mike Fenoia]

Giannis has got no points.

[Giannis Pappas]

Wow.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Damn. Big J running away with it.

[Mike Fenoia]

How did I get six? I got something right.

[Kevin Ryan]

You two people voted for you.

[Alex]

You tricked two people. So I have Mike with four points, Kevin with five points, Giannis with six points.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yes.

[Alex]

Lewis with 10 points and Big J with with 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

Story warriors pulling the ahead. Baby boy with a couple.

[Big J Okerson]

We did some bumps in the road.

[Kevin Ryan]

But there's two more rounds.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This game's ready.

[Mike Fenoia]

And now we do quadruple points.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Triple points.

[Mike Fenoia]

Triple points.

[Giannis Pappas]

Alex.

[Big J Okerson]

Story number seven.

[Alex]

Story number seven. I once got a ticket for being drunk and calling a young looking rookie cop Officer Harry Potter.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's a great line.

[Big J Okerson]

That could be a drunk Mike thinking he's being hilarious.

[Kevin Ryan]

Officer dad jokes at 19.

[Big J Okerson]

Now Lewis is a huge Harry Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

Huge.

[Big J Okerson]

Read all the books.

[Giannis Pappas]

Read all the books. Didn't watch the movies because the movies suck.

[Big J Okerson]

Within our friend. Within our friendship. Within our friendship time. Twice. Lewis called me late night and I was. And I was like, what are you doing? So there's a lot of people there. He goes, I'm in line for that new Harry Potter book.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Whoa.

[Giannis Pappas]

I remember the girl that I wrote the Legion of Saints poem about, Alex. That girl.

[Kevin Ryan]

Still in love with.

[Giannis Pappas]

Still in love with her. Thinking better ever. No. But we went on vacation to Puerto Rico. She was, you know, in the bomb. Went to Puerto Rico.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, yeah, Puerto Rico.

[Giannis Pappas]

In that. In that. During that trip, the seventh Harry Potter book had come out. And I just sat on the beach the whole time. Read the whole book, front to back.

[Mike Fenoia]

She was. And then you got drunk, the cop came and you called the Harry Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

So anyway, that's a long story short. I did call this guy Harry Potter in Puerto Rico. No, it wasn't me, but I did.

[Big J Okerson]

You're stoned now. You're telling the story super long about the ex girlfriend. This smells like Lewis hardcore to me.

[Mike Fenoia]

This was Officer Harry Potter. He was like a young white officer. I'm thinking Maine again.

[Big J Okerson]

I've never got a ticket. Being drunk, that's never been a thing.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Me either.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm thinking.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm thinking this is Kevin Ryan too.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Listen, you can think what you want.

[Big J Okerson]

You're quick witted and sharp as hell.

[Giannis Pappas]

You're funny.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

All right, it was me. I'll do. Go on.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't think you're funny.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You're a drinker.

[Giannis Pappas]

You got great references.

[Big J Okerson]

That's what I'm saying. You pull it up quick. You. You see it. You scan the room. You go, this is going bad. But I can't help myself. Officer Harry Potter.

[Kevin Ryan]

And you were in that cop's face.

[Big J Okerson]

To get the ticket.

[Kevin Ryan]

You didn't call him that when he was walking.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm a. I come from a long line of cops. I respect that. I respect the blue. Whatever. Long line of Philly cops give me.

[Giannis Pappas]

Whatever ticket you want.

[Big J Okerson]

The Phils just got shelled.

[Mike Fenoia]

But you also have a drinking problem.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, I wouldn't call it a problem.

[Big J Okerson]

Never seen this.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I party.

[Big J Okerson]

Likes to get down for sure.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Don't narc on my friend.

[Big J Okerson]

Loser.

[Giannis Pappas]

Stop.

[Kevin Ryan]

Bliss Johnson.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis wears glasses. That wouldn't make sense.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think it would make sense.

[Giannis Pappas]

Calling the kettle blackness.

[Big J Okerson]

No, no, no. But it's not just glasses.

[Kevin Ryan]

But in college I did.

[Mike Fenoia]

You didn't have glasses.

[Giannis Pappas]

You didn't have glasses.

[Big J Okerson]

No.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But also this seems like a.

[Big J Okerson]

If you have a style, if you're going by that rule, stylish glasses are not necessarily. Someone's going to call you Harry Potter. You got to have glasses that make you like Harry Potter. This is Lewis once again finding a weak deflection.

[Kevin Ryan]

Right.

[Big J Okerson]

Because he's the Harry Potter reference guy. He's so stoked on himself for saying Harry Potter is somebody.

[Giannis Pappas]

I wouldn't call him Harry Potter. I would, I would make it way cooler.

[Big J Okerson]

Reference.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's what I think. As, as a Harry Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

All right, Professor Snape. Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Arrest me. Arrest me, Dusseldorf.

[Kevin Ryan]

Whatever unicorn from book five.

[Big J Okerson]

Whatever. Gary. Open in the fire in that thing.

[Kevin Ryan]

Whatever thing that takes the soul out of people.

[Mike Fenoia]

I don't know if there's just going to be an officer that looks like, like Harry Potter where you live, but I know there will be one where you.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This, this, this to me.

[Kevin Ryan]

I used to live in Denver too.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This, this rings like Mike at a fish show and they.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, my God.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't know. I didn't know I had run into the wall.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't see the way of being like a belligerent drunk where he was a belligerent.

[Big J Okerson]

This is a belligerent. So let me say something. I know Mike. And the more I'm thinking about this one. I'm sorry, you know him.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

The bet.

[Big J Okerson]

You know, if I turn everybody here on this one. I'm very sorry. Mike being drunk in that situation was Mike. He can't hide it. It's all on his sleeve.

[Kevin Ryan]

You're right.

[Big J Okerson]

And so if he's gonna say, he's gonna say it. But I promise you, this was he said it. If it's Mike, it was in the spirit of like, this guy's gonna be like, I get that all the time. They're gonna do like a Viking behind the head, those things. He's going to drive him home and then realize that the guy did not do that at all. I, I think right now I'm, I'm laying heavy on foia.

[Mike Fenoia]

Okay. I think it's said with anger because they got the ticket. They're drunk.

[Big J Okerson]

That doesn't strike me as Mike. Then it takes me out of Mike Foa.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, no, no.

[Big J Okerson]

And, and now maybe I haven't seen a drunk, belligerent Kevin R. Kevin's always been. I don't think I've ever seen you drunk.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Thank you. Yeah, I was cruising together.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I was up for four days straight.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude, you.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Ye, well, whatever. I, I, if anybody's ever listened to ayg. I'm a very non confrontational.

[Mike Fenoia]

Oh boy.

[Big J Okerson]

Even obliterated.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, it's Kevin.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, this is Kevin.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I would have been. I've never been arrested. I've never been arrested for drunk in public. And I drink a lot.

[Giannis Pappas]

P is nervous. But wait is nervous. He's the way.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Stand by the blue.

[Big J Okerson]

How much Sicilian do you have? Quick. This isn't arrested. This isn't arrested. This is a ticket.

[Mike Fenoia]

A lot of Sicilian.

[Giannis Pappas]

Mike Foyo.

[Mike Fenoia]

Mike Sicilian.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's. He's drunk, angry and we. When we put it on Kevin Ryan for a moment he got excited and he was like, yeah, it's Kevin. And now his body language, he's like holding his hands. He's looking forward. What are you doing? Oh, because I didn't spell it right.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's not just me. It's not an easy name.

[Big J Okerson]

You spelled it wrong too.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's not easy.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This has Mike. This has Mike some Podung.

[Kevin Ryan]

No, look, you did ioa.

[Big J Okerson]

I never write it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This has Mike in some like you know, main state trooper. Whatever you say. I'm on acid. I'm a degenerate.

[Giannis Pappas]

Okay, Officer Harry Potter. Can I go to my fish show now?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. Enough.

[Mike Fenoia]

There's two eyes in there.

[Big J Okerson]

Are you done harshing my bellow?

[Mike Fenoia]

Well, why is nobody suspecting Jay at all?

[Kevin Ryan]

Because it's him probably.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, why is he?

[Big J Okerson]

Nobody.

[Kevin Ryan]

Got drunk. He never got drunk enough to get a ticket.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, I know that he's not. Yeah, he's not a big drinker like that.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

But he is quick witted.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's never got a ticket for being drunk. I would know that.

[Mike Fenoia]

Officer Harry Potter. That's sounds like something would say quick wit Officer Harry Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean it's not that great of a joke. Guys if everyone's giv quick. How much we're giving so much credit for this.

[Big J Okerson]

Officer Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, no, no, guys, it's okay.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think it's Mike because it's such a brilliant. I'm saying this is Mike. I'm telling you that's why I think it's. Mike is not in anger. Like be honest. You were thinking in my mind it's.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

A very like light hearted.

[Big J Okerson]

Whoa, Officer Harry Potter's still going to take me in. And you don't think there's any anger.

[Mike Fenoia]

After getting a ticket?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's like a felony, right?

[Big J Okerson]

Drunk driving.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah. No, no, it's not drunk driving.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, drunk. He's walking around.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It says after a fish show back.

[Big J Okerson]

To his goddamn van. Yeah, you're right. You're right.

[Mike Fenoia]

If it was drinking and driving, it.

[Big J Okerson]

Would have been everyone.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I want to say it's a great joke.

[Big J Okerson]

This is a mean score.

[Mike Fenoia]

Damn it. It's going to be Kevin.

[Giannis Pappas]

Who is it? Alex?

[Mike Fenoia]

God damn it.

[Alex]

That was Kevin Ryan.

[Mike Fenoia]

When he said it was a great joke. When he said it was a great joke.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What? He said he respects the blue New Jersey.

[Kevin Ryan]

Damn it, I knew that was you.

[Giannis Pappas]

God damn.

[Kevin Ryan]

Tell that story. I want to hear this story.

[Big J Okerson]

I've never even been drunk in public and I drink a lot. Damn, dude. The memory bubbles after it gets ready out. You're like, why would. Why would my friend look at me and say something like that?

[Giannis Pappas]

Ah, this is a great game.

[Big J Okerson]

How can my friend just look at me and lie?

[Mike Fenoia]

Technically, Lewis didn't get it wrong, cuz he picked finne.

[Big J Okerson]

I corrected it all, Henry.

[Mike Fenoia]

You corrected it wrong.

[Big J Okerson]

Wrong. I corrected it wrongly. In fact, he had the O after the N. I corrected it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, I was right.

[Kevin Ryan]

You were closer to being wrong.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, I'm sorry, I. I smelled it wrong and then I crossed some out.

[Mike Fenoia]

Can I just say something, Kevin? Well played.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, well.

[Kevin Ryan]

That was well played. I knew immediately.

[Mike Fenoia]

What's the story, Kevin?

[Giannis Pappas]

What happened? What happened with this cop?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I was. I was drunk in North Wildwood, New Jersey, right outside Keenan's. If you ever been there, shout out to him.

[Big J Okerson]

I haven't, but it sounds like a place that a lot of people listening to be like, nice, nice.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Dude, you're on Peggy's patio.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's a guy going, turn it up right now. They're talking about it.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Keenan's listening.

[Big J Okerson]

Yo, we made it, Billy. Yo, no way. They mentioned other things. Would everybody watch the Rocky fight on black and white?

[Kevin Ryan]

What that guy would drink now for whenever he shows up again?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

And a lot of like these resort towns, they have like auxiliary cops for the summer, you know what I mean? That was probably 24, 25, whatever. This kid was like 18. We were drunk and they were like, you got to clear the streets. So we were on the sidewalk, right? And he's like, you just got to get out of the street. I was on the sidewalk and I stumbled a little. I had been drinking, right? I stumbled a little bit. I'm holding court out there, you know, I'm bebopping and scatting, I'm fucking laying in, I'm doing an act out. I step into the street, this fucking jerk off goes, whoa, whoa, whoa. I told you already. And I said, hey, Officer Harry Potter, why don't you zip it.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, he's like.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He was like 17.

[Big J Okerson]

Auxiliary cop.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Auxiliary cop. No gun. Like, sure, you know. And I was just like, hey, Officer Harry Potter. Calm down. Whatever. And his boy laughed. He was with like a real cop.

[Big J Okerson]

He was like, oh, this is what happens to you little queens who come out here for the summer.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Who looks like me. The cop looks like me now. So.

[Big J Okerson]

Zing.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

And Potter didn't like it.

[Kevin Ryan]

It and summer cop Potter's like, that's why I keep finding wooden owls in my locker. They're all calling him Harry Potter behind his back.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So, yeah, I ruined his summer for sure.

[Big J Okerson]

It was.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It was Memorial Day weekend. He got so he ripped out the T. Ticket book right away. And I looked at the. The real cop. I was like, dude. He's like, you got.

[Giannis Pappas]

You got like, dude.

[Big J Okerson]

He goes, let me tell you something. Worth it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Worth it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Worth.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's worth the 187 or whatever it was.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

How was that?

[Mike Fenoia]

How much was the ticket?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I think 100. They were like 125. It was like drunk in public or whatever.

[Kevin Ryan]

He had to do four spells.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Ever seen the movies?

[Big J Okerson]

Just. No. Yeah. It's good though. It's good. Be good reference.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You just pegged me right away. You're like, you're pretty quick witted and good with references.

[Kevin Ryan]

I was like, thank you.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This was not me.

[Kevin Ryan]

I immediately saw, you guessed going, all right, Harry, Officer Harry Potter. Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I was like, heck down to see like what happen.

[Giannis Pappas]

What are. What are our scores?

[Big J Okerson]

Scoreboards?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's a big swing.

[Kevin Ryan]

I got. I got big, right?

[Alex]

I have Giannis with six points, Mike with eight points, Kevin with 11 points, Lewis with 10 points. Sorry. And Big J with 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

Anybody's game.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Fourth quarter, double points. Is this the last question?

[Giannis Pappas]

His game right now.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Why am I so tense?

[Mike Fenoia]

Any direction can I get 20?

[Kevin Ryan]

How about anybody wins if they.

[Big J Okerson]

So.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So Jay has one. Jay has three on me right now. Okay.

[Mike Fenoia]

I am mathematically out. Full sweep.

[Big J Okerson]

Let's go.

[Kevin Ryan]

A full sweep is everyone guesses you and you guess the right person.

[Giannis Pappas]

Not enough sweep is. It's your story.

[Big J Okerson]

Your story.

[Giannis Pappas]

Fool everyone.

[Big J Okerson]

Fool everybody. But Kevin almost did until you came in, dude.

[Kevin Ryan]

Because I knew it wasn't me.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's time.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't know what put you guys on Fanoia scent, but I jumped in on that.

[Big J Okerson]

It was fun. I just. I live with Mike for a while, so I've seen him in a couple things. Where? At the airports, particularly where I've been like, mike, smile and don't Be nasty to a person with your face. So, Mike, apologies.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm sorry.

[Big J Okerson]

I thought that was my. And Mike's like, yeah, maybe if you really wear it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Maybe if people start getting my fucking name right, I won't be.

[Mike Fenoia]

So there's two eyes.

[Big J Okerson]

It is an IRA that lives inside of you. For sure.

[Kevin Ryan]

It's gonna be Michael CK from now on.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Start jerking off.

[Big J Okerson]

Let's talk about one of our awesome sponsors here over at Story wars, and that, of course, is my bookie. Everybody. The seasons are in flux. Basketball has started.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hell yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Football is.

[Giannis Pappas]

I wonder what. I wonder what their line on Trump versus Kamala is.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, fuck only knows. I think I would say Trump in the fourth knockout, tko. She can't. She can't make the bell. She's so busted up on her face. Look, Trump, what's the bet? Can you bet on if Trump kills her like Drago killed Apollo?

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't think you could do any of that.

[Big J Okerson]

And then someone's going to be like. And then somebody other political goes, throw the damn top.

[Giannis Pappas]

Look, it really does make sports so much better. I love mma. I love watching the fights. Throw a little bit of cashola on the game. You're gonna feel a lot more involved.

[Big J Okerson]

And they're not gonna question you. If you win a bunch in a row, no one's gonna assume there's a possibility that a future. You came back in a DeLorean that you stole from a crazy old man and a kid with Parkinson's. And then you found an almanac and you brought it here to tell your. Your young self. Bet on the Yankees a couple times.

[Giannis Pappas]

Look, when you bet with my book, you're not just watching the games. You're investing in every moment of action.

[Big J Okerson]

Why didn't the old man go back and fuck teenage Leah Thompson, Whatever his mom was. Get in right now and use promo code Warz. That's W A R Z. To claim a bonus of up to $1,000 on your first deposit. That's a hell of a deal. That's promo Code Wars. W A R Z to start the football season off playing with house money. And also my bookie will keep you coming back for more with tons of exclusive lines, free bets, and access to VIP contests. Bet on anything, anywhere, anytime. Only with my bookie. All right, let's get back into it.

[Alex]

Story number eight. I've had a cop pull a gun.

[Kevin Ryan]

On Holy shit and put it in your butt.

[Big J Okerson]

That's right. That was on this side of the team.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Well, this is vague. Not a lot of Deets in this story.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. That's serious.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This could be anybody, given the life we kind of live at some point. Late night drives, whatever the, you know, expired license, something absolute. Situations, Drunk in Wildwood, you know, whatever.

[Big J Okerson]

I can think of a situation with all of us possibly having this happen. I mean, I used to have a lot of black dudes in my car at once.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right.

[Big J Okerson]

When I was in the black comedy circuit, I would drive to everywhere from D.C. to Boston with guys named, like, Cool Bubba, Ice and Black Shogun and Tumble Too Smooth.

[Kevin Ryan]

Pull a Gun on Me, Johnson.

[Big J Okerson]

It was, yeah, Buck the Fuck Wild. Several people that have definitely had guns held on them before.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, Giannis is.

[Mike Fenoia]

I opened for Donnell Rollin killings for a long time.

[Giannis Pappas]

You were.

[Big J Okerson]

I think there was actual gunplay involved.

[Mike Fenoia]

Might have been, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

You opened for Aim It At Me Robinson for a while.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I deserve way better.

[Kevin Ryan]

I know.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's killing in the podcast.

[Kevin Ryan]

F I N O I A.

[Mike Fenoia]

On the social.

[Big J Okerson]

Ground level, it doesn't.

[Mike Fenoia]

Sound like it has two eyes in it. It sounds like one.

[Kevin Ryan]

It sounds like a Y at the end. Yeah, but I'm Italian.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, we don't have Y's in the Italian.

[Big J Okerson]

By the way, when we go on the road, sometimes I'll write it out just for the sake of whatever. F I N O Y A. Still nothing, by the way. What's great is going on the road, and it's like an older guy hosting for us. Like, just a dog who's just been in that town forever. And then when they'll get it wrong twice, and Mike will be like, it's. If you want me to write it finitely or something, he goes, I'll probably get it by the end of the weekend.

[Kevin Ryan]

And then they just go, make some noise for my friends, Mike, Sam. And it just blends into Van Halen.

[Big J Okerson]

Cop pull a gun on me. I think this could be. Damn. This could be a lot.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Anybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

What a great last.

[Giannis Pappas]

Anybody's story.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's not me.

[Giannis Pappas]

I gotta go. Based off how people are acting. Giannis.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yes, sir.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is this your story?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Giannis has been shot.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yes, counselor.

[Big J Okerson]

Took an actual bullet.

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis has taken a bullet. Giannis has had guns pulled out of my car. Cops, probably. Have you?

[Mike Fenoia]

Have I.

[Giannis Pappas]

Have you ever had a gun pulled on you by a cop?

[Mike Fenoia]

Have I ever had a gun pulled on me?

[Big J Okerson]

This isn't a goddamn televised interview.

[Mike Fenoia]

The answer is. He's like, wait, what would I have done to have a cop pull a gun on me?

[Kevin Ryan]

He's like, why don't we talk about the ob.

[Giannis Pappas]

Why are you saying it like I.

[Mike Fenoia]

Was the one shot, but they kind.

[Kevin Ryan]

Of pointed it at you?

[Big J Okerson]

They probably was like, everybody get down.

[Kevin Ryan]

He goes, are you all right?

[Big J Okerson]

We'll be right back, guy.

[Giannis Pappas]

You've never. So. You've never had a gun pulled on your back?

[Mike Fenoia]

I've never had a gun pulled on me, so.

[Giannis Pappas]

Have you ever had a gun pulled on your back?

[Big J Okerson]

Up.

[Giannis Pappas]

You have?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I've had a.

[Giannis Pappas]

You don't know why.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know why.

[Big J Okerson]

Say this.

[Kevin Ryan]

And I called him sir.

[Big J Okerson]

This is fun to say this, I guess. I'll tell you 100%. I've had a gun pulled on me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

It doesn't mean it was by a cop or not, or it could be multiple times, but kind of.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What. What is this you're doing?

[Giannis Pappas]

I had a gun by a cop.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

What the. Jay's like, Jay's going to just loosely admit to it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jay goes, I'm throwing this out there. I've seen a cop. I've had a gun pulled on me.

[Big J Okerson]

He says, I've had a cop pulled on me. I've had a gun pulled on me for sure. Maybe it's happened more than once. Once was a cop, once wasn't.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Why are you so vague, man?

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah, why are you talking so much?

[Giannis Pappas]

Kevin, have you ever had a gun pulled on you by a cop?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No.

[Kevin Ryan]

Hey, Lewis, you ever had a gun pulled on you by a cop?

[Big J Okerson]

No, Mike. You don't know why?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Said the world's worst liar.

[Giannis Pappas]

I really haven't.

[Big J Okerson]

I know. Mike gets pulled over with his druggie friends, and he's cracking wise to the guy. They might pull a gun out.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, I called him Officer.

[Big J Okerson]

Melting.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Man.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm really.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't even have a guess. Yes.

[Big J Okerson]

Fuck you, Kevin. It's you now. I don't even possibly know who this is. No.

[Kevin Ryan]

Kevin would go, no, it wouldn't be me, because I never break the law. I smile at every cop.

[Big J Okerson]

He said he's never had a gun.

[Giannis Pappas]

Pulled on him ever.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I first put down my brother. I never had a gun pulled on me.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's you, then.

[Giannis Pappas]

But you also lied about being drunk in public, you lying piece of shit.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Yeah, I lie, man.

[Big J Okerson]

That's the gang.

[Kevin Ryan]

Maybe Officer Harry Potter had a water gun. We don't know if it's a real gun.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Dude, it was.

[Kevin Ryan]

Could have just been a wizard.

[Big J Okerson]

It's Kelly Armis, you dweeb. By the way, there's some fat girl listening to us who just went, that's why I love Him.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

She goes, yeah, I'll subscribe to the Patreon.

[Mike Fenoia]

Jay, Jay.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Jay.

[Mike Fenoia]

Jay. You have any. A lot of run ins with cops?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes.

[Mike Fenoia]

You did? Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

What?

[Mike Fenoia]

What happened?

[Big J Okerson]

Yes, man. So many. They hate me so much.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So they'd pull a gun on you, right?

[Kevin Ryan]

I've had a cop pull a gun on you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I've had cops offering this for no reason.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had a cop puller.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

On my head.

[Mike Fenoia]

I've had a copy of gun on.

[Big J Okerson]

Mike's going Meisner. Mike's got four. Meisner.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, I have had a couple. I have.

[Big J Okerson]

I've had a couple.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I've had a.

[Kevin Ryan]

Guys, wait. I've had a coup.

[Big J Okerson]

I've had a. I've had a couple of gun on me.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've had a couple of gun.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know what, guys?

[Mike Fenoia]

So it's you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I've had a couple of gun on me, guys.

[Big J Okerson]

You know, this reminds me. This actually still reminds me of a time that, you know, maybe I sent this in because I've had a couple.

[Kevin Ryan]

You think you've had a cop.

[Big J Okerson]

You.

[Kevin Ryan]

I've had a cop pull a gun.

[Big J Okerson]

No, dude, that was a security guy. I had a cop pull a gun on me.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had a cop pull a gun.

[Mike Fenoia]

I also had a cop pull a gun on me.

[Giannis Pappas]

You did?

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Cop. I'm a loser.

[Kevin Ryan]

We got him.

[Mike Fenoia]

I also had a cop pull a gun on me.

[Big J Okerson]

Lewis, I believe there's a time where you had a cop pull a gun on you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I did. I. You know what? I've had it twice. I've had it happen twice. As I think about it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

100% pull gun. I've had someone pull a gun on me. I'm not saying it was a cop. I'm saying it was three times. And once wasn't a cop. Two times were cops. Whoa.

[Mike Fenoia]

What?

[Big J Okerson]

Two cops have pulled guns on me. That's what I would have sent. This isn't at me.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

One cop pulled two guns on me.

[Big J Okerson]

All right.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm literally losing my mind.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Freaking me out.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm in a cartoon.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I'm like, about to. I had to say that joke to get to stop whatever was happening. I'm freaking the out.

[Mike Fenoia]

This feels like the last scene in Reservoir Dog. All have guns pulled on each other.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Why am I so tense in this podcast?

[Big J Okerson]

It's crazy because you get emotionally wrapped into the game because.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

So who do we think it was?

[Giannis Pappas]

I. It has to be honest.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I am a gun.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm Tiger Woods.

[Kevin Ryan]

Jay had a gun pull a cop on him. That's F, I, N, O, Y, N.

[Mike Fenoia]

It's not Kevin, because Kevin has run in with auxiliary cops.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

You better believe it could be Jay.

[Mike Fenoia]

Because he said he had two cops pull the gun on him. Could be Lewis, because he's looking at me like it's me.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's Giannis, because he's narrating everything right now.

[Kevin Ryan]

But you narrated earlier. You hit us all. You inquisitive.

[Giannis Pappas]

That could be some noise. You. Because he's pointing his pen right now. That's a sign.

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, pen pointing. Mike's always guilty. It's fine.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's my tell.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. As soon as I pointed that pen.

[Big J Okerson]

This is. I'd like to believe this is the story where Kevin was like, hey, Officer, Harry Potter. And that auxiliary cop grabbed the gun from the Xbox. He goes, yeah, yeah. Well, my magic wand goes, hey. He's like, whoa, man, I'll take the ticket.

[Kevin Ryan]

Who's gonna eat my lunch? Lunch tomorrow?

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah. And then the cop would come over and lower the gun.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Hey, it's your first day, man.

[Kevin Ryan]

You don't know how to use that.

[Big J Okerson]

And then the cop just went, take the ticket, man.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

This guy means business.

[Big J Okerson]

This guy's not around. He's here for the summer. He has nothing to lose.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He's trying to make a name for himself.

[Big J Okerson]

I want.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I have no idea.

[Kevin Ryan]

I had Giannis written down, and I erased it.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm feeling Lewis. Lewis.

[Big J Okerson]

I feel like too.

[Giannis Pappas]

If it were me.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I feel like I'd know if a cop.

[Kevin Ryan]

How many stories did Lewis have so far?

[Big J Okerson]

It doesn't matter.

[Kevin Ryan]

Yeah, but I don't know for sure.

[Big J Okerson]

Listen, you can play the numbers for sure, but you'd have to be Rain man because we all.

[Kevin Ryan]

Now I think it's Jay.

[Big J Okerson]

There's for sure more stories than there are.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jay's acting. He's never acted like this before.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Explain the game to people. You know, I love explaining this game a lot. Lewis, you give two points if you guess right.

[Mike Fenoia]

Right.

[Big J Okerson]

Have you ever.

[Mike Fenoia]

Have you ever been really heartbroken over an ex? Showed up at a house, cops were called gun pulled on you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm still in love with you.

[Big J Okerson]

Leave me alone. I never gave up on us. Sir. We asked you to go home. You Harry Potter.

[Giannis Pappas]

I love you.

[Big J Okerson]

You can still make it work. I'll change.

[Kevin Ryan]

Go back to dork warts.

[Mike Fenoia]

Jay, why did the cop pull the gun on you?

[Big J Okerson]

Oh, man. Driving while friends with black people in the car? Yeah, if I've had a gun pulled over.

[Giannis Pappas]

You were an accessory to black.

[Big J Okerson]

Dude. I got pulled over. So Many times. Just driving a little bit. Something wrong with lots of black people in the car. And you can tell when they pull you over. You're like. They're wondering. This is a weird grouping of people.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

They're looking at Jay, are you all right?

[Mike Fenoia]

See, this is confusing because if we.

[Big J Okerson]

Pick Jay, what the wild technically did.

[Mike Fenoia]

Have a gun pull.

[Giannis Pappas]

Technically.

[Big J Okerson]

Technically.

[Giannis Pappas]

Technically.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, he's lying.

[Mike Fenoia]

Or he could just.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm saying I've been pulled on.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Stop saying. Stop doing this.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't want to. Yeah. I don't see Asher of this, but I've had a gun. I've had a cop pull a gun on me.

[Mike Fenoia]

You have?

[Giannis Pappas]

I have.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm telling you honestly, this could be some mind kind of reverse.

[Big J Okerson]

This could be total mind.

[Mike Fenoia]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I said it earlier.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm going. Yeah.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Going, yes or noya looks at the cop.

[Big J Okerson]

Mike is playing such a good game right now. If it's him, because it's anybody's game.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't even know what the points are at right now. I'm so.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He wrote his. I don't know why I think he wrote his. I've done this one. I lied. He wrote it. You write yours down first to start getting the momentum. Be like, oh, yeah, you're right. It is Jay. It is Jay. You know what I mean?

[Giannis Pappas]

Is it Kevin Ryan? I think Kevin's already had like three stories.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Well, I got good.

[Big J Okerson]

Good story.

[Kevin Ryan]

It was all one story, broken up into three. It was one time as an alcoholic at Wildwood, I called a cop.

[Big J Okerson]

Guys, really quick to remind you why we do it. The Guardian said, how to Build a Girl emerges as a quasi cautionary tale about how personal development. Building yourself is a process as opposed to an exact science.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's amazing. That is geek. Is that an excerpt of Lewis's new book?

[Kevin Ryan]

Thank you for. Thank you for that lane assist. We needed that.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm trying to think, if I was a cop, who would I pull a gun? Who would I feel most threatened by?

[Kevin Ryan]

You would.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Giannis would shoot himself in his bedroom.

[Mike Fenoia]

Who would I feel threatened?

[Giannis Pappas]

Giannis is playing a different game right now, and I really him.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm going for a Doug Fluty Hail Mary right now. And you know it because that's what I need.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't know references like that.

[Mike Fenoia]

Football.

[Big J Okerson]

Hail Mary and Aaron Rodgers.

[Mike Fenoia]

And Aaron Rodgers to the end zone.

[Giannis Pappas]

I've written the name Giannis Papas down seven times.

[Mike Fenoia]

Are you sure you want to do that?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I've done the same thing with Mike and I'm sticking with Mike, I'm more.

[Giannis Pappas]

Positive than I've ever been before.

[Mike Fenoia]

You think a cop would be threatened enough by me to pull a gun?

[Giannis Pappas]

I think that you deserve to have a gun.

[Big J Okerson]

Gunpowder.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'm so mad that I didn't put Giannis. Now I'm positive it's Giannis.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Does that make you nervous? Does that make you nervous?

[Giannis Pappas]

Huh?

[Kevin Ryan]

No.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

We're going, Mikey.

[Kevin Ryan]

Not the slightest.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Mikey Finoya. Two Eyes.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm going Giannis. And I drew a picture of John Stamos playing the guitar.

[Kevin Ryan]

Uncle Jesse.

[Big J Okerson]

Uncle Jesse. And the Rivers.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Wait, has anybody ever heard the story? Jay's a pretty good drawer. Drinking. Draw. Like illustrator. Illustrator. Draw. Drawler. I got a bad Philly accent. His uncle asked him to draw pictures of naked ladies. He told the story. It's the funniest story I've ever heard of my life, I swear. He taught us on the cruise. And I'm like, that's a bit. And he's like, oh, no. I've never told anybody that in my life.

[Big J Okerson]

My Uncle Mark had a bit of a heroin problem through the first 15, 16 years of my life. And I could draw like that.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Like, saw, like, could draw better than the normal person.

[Big J Okerson]

Nonsense. Not drawing, though. And he was looking for money so much, he approached me to ask.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He goes, he looked at some pictures and went, you're pretty good at this.

[Big J Okerson]

Because you're a good drawer if you can draw. Basically some pornographic stuff, I could sell it. And so I was like, yeah. So I drew with colored pencil, the shittiest. I didn't even know what he meant. He meant some dirty shit, I think. For sure. Sure. And not that I wasn't thinking dirty, but I was just like, I don't know what he's talking about. So I drew, like. Like a rock video. Like a girl chained to a fence and just, like, little pink lips, like, on her.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He came back a week later.

[Big J Okerson]

I called my Uncle Mark. I was like, done. And he was like, I'll come pick it up now. I didn't realize what I was doing was crazy. So my stepfather was like, where are you going with your sketch pad? I went, oh, Uncle Mark says he's gonna be able to sell. Look. I drew a picture of a girl with a hanging out. Uncle Mark's going to be able to sell it.

[Kevin Ryan]

Uncle Mark.

[Big J Okerson]

And then he went, hey, go up to your room and have your Uncle Mark come in here real quick.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Uncle Mark walked in, looked at like, I can't sell this, by the way.

[Big J Okerson]

No, I saw what happened. He walked in My stepfather yelled at him. I called him to be like, hey, I don't know. I'm sorry you got yelled at. I don't know what went wrong. There he goes. Yeah, he goes, it's fine. So that's not even what I'm looking for. I don't know what that is. He like what a 12, a 13 year old boy thought of.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

There's not even penetration in this.

[Big J Okerson]

Like what a porn porno is supposed to be. A girl chained to a thing with their tits out and ill proportioned tits and. And a weird going through odd butt cheek, legs. Sure.

[Mike Fenoia]

Jay, when you. When the gun. When the cops pulled you over.

[Big J Okerson]

They pulled the gun on me.

[Mike Fenoia]

Did they pull the gun on you or did they go you over there and then put the gun on.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's not how they pulled the gun on me.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah, I feel like the gun.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I think it's Fenoia, right?

[Big J Okerson]

Like what did I say for everybody? Oh, Yanis, I voted for you. No. Yeah, dude. A cop pulled a gun on me.

[Kevin Ryan]

Cop pulled the gun on me.

[Giannis Pappas]

Everyone pulled a gun on me. A cop pulled a gun on me. A cop pulled. I'm gonna lose my mind.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Fight Club.

[Mike Fenoia]

God damn it. I have no clue who it is.

[Big J Okerson]

None of us do.

[Mike Fenoia]

I have no clue.

[Big J Okerson]

It's F I N O I A. I feel like.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't know why. I feel like he's telling us the truth now.

[Mike Fenoia]

Cop pulled a gun on me.

[Big J Okerson]

Ryan's the only one who took him at face value.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Goes, okay, hey, this guy's been shooting me straight all night.

[Kevin Ryan]

I don't know how many times.

[Big J Okerson]

He goes, one thing about Mike Fenoya, square biz.

[Mike Fenoia]

He, he. How many points does he have? Because he could just be doing it to throw the round because he knows he's gonna win.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

I don't think he's closed.

[Big J Okerson]

Giannis. Now, I've never been more sure it's you. Wait a second. Let's do a little quick.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean everyone's but that. Now I'm thinking it's not Giannis, because why?

[Lewis J. Gomez]

No, but he's the last.

[Big J Okerson]

He would be.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He would just throw a penis.

[Big J Okerson]

I don't think it's Giannis. Yeah, look at in his head.

[Giannis Pappas]

Unless he doesn't understand how the game works.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

That's also true. He might not realize he's already won.

[Mike Fenoia]

You ever seen the Princess Bride? I gotcha. I got you.

[Big J Okerson]

I got you.

[Giannis Pappas]

I still, you know, I still think it's Giannis.

[Big J Okerson]

I'm still confident it's Giannis, but. Ah.

[Mike Fenoia]

Kevin.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Ryan, it's not me. You have my word. Yanni.

[Mike Fenoia]

I want nobody time.

[Kevin Ryan]

He lied to you.

[Mike Fenoia]

Jay had a gun pulled on him.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Stop saying that.

[Kevin Ryan]

That's how we became friends. We met at a cop pulled a gun on me.

[Big J Okerson]

I just didn't submit the story. I said, Mike said, you take it this way.

[Mike Fenoia]

I'm going with Big J. Fenoia, we split the book.

[Kevin Ryan]

I'll read it to you on the road.

[Big J Okerson]

I have a feeling now there's two O's and two eyes.

[Mike Fenoia]

Big J, he drew a cartoon.

[Giannis Pappas]

If it's Giannis after all this, I'm actually gonna beat him up.

[Big J Okerson]

I want to go home.

[Mike Fenoia]

Big J. It's Big J. I bet. I think it's Big J. Let me see. Dude.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

It's so.

[Mike Fenoia]

J. O.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

He's a lion.

[Big J Okerson]

Dirty.

[Kevin Ryan]

If it's you, I'm gonna be so.

[Mike Fenoia]

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

[Big J Okerson]

Alex. The final story belongs to.

[Alex]

That was Lewis J.

[Giannis Pappas]

I've had a cop pull a gun on me.

[Big J Okerson]

How have you not mentioned it every day of your life? I feel like you would really hang your hat on that. And I've had a couple of them on me.

[Giannis Pappas]

I have. I, I, I'm sure. I for sure told you guys any. I mean, there's been a few times I wasn't worried about that. The time I was thinking about, there was me, my buddy Dave Green, and.

[Big J Okerson]

He'S such a white guy.

[Giannis Pappas]

My friends for my. My buddies from Salty Blackfunder, James Mecham and Dave Green, we were smoking a blunt behind the Palisade Center Mall. There was, like, a parking lot, like, way away from the mall. And we were like. There was like, these, like, trailers, and we're just smoking weed. And these cops just, like, three cop cars just fucking. They were like, we were waiting for this fucking moment. They had nothing else to do, and they just fucking pulled. They pulled guns on us. They were screaming at us. We were just literally kids smoking weed. We were nervous, but, yeah, that was that.

[Lewis J. Gomez]

Damn.

[Big J Okerson]

Yeah.

[Kevin Ryan]

I immediately thought you. And then I'm like, maybe I am racing.

[Mike Fenoia]

Racist.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Big J Okerson]

Score. Shake up, everybody. Alex, could you read off the final scores, please?

[Alex]

Final scores. I have Giannis with six points, Mike Finoya with eight points, Kevin Ryan with 11 points, Big J with 14, and Louis J. Gomez with 18.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, my God. Everybody.

[Kevin Ryan]

The buck stays.

[Big J Okerson]

How to Build a Girl stays in the Story wars library.

[Giannis Pappas]

Lewis, thank you for keeping inside of the mind and heart and soul of Caitlin Moran.

[Big J Okerson]

Buddy.

[Giannis Pappas]

My dream.

[Big J Okerson]

Well, not so much, but Dolly Wilde, the fast talking, hard drinking, gothic hero at a full time ladies sex adventure, everybody. We'll have a big, big round of applause for everybody up here on our panel. Everybody. Giannis Pappas, Mike Fenoa, Kevin Ryan, you know your story. Warriors Louis J. Gomez and Bake, the Elkerson for Kevin. Catch you guys next time on Story Wars.