Story Warz Episode 035: Shane Gillis, Matt McCusker, & Joe DeRosa | Heat
Introduction
In Episode 035 of Story Warz, hosted by the GaS Digital Network, comedians Big Jay Oakerson and Luis J. Gomez welcome a star-studded panel, including Shane Gillis, Matt McCusker, and Joe DeRosa, for an evening of comedic storytelling and sharp-witted deception. Filmed live from The Stand Comedy Club in New York City, the episode centers around the theme of "Heat," challenging participants to craft compelling and deceptive stories under time constraints.
Understanding the Game
At [05:13], Big Jay Oakerson lays out the rules of Story Warz. Each panelist, including hosts Big Jay and Luis, submits three to five stories related to the episode's theme—"Heat." The stories are then read aloud by the producer, Alex, and participants must discern whether the story is their own or one submitted by another panelist. Points are awarded based on correct guesses and successful deceptions:
- 2 points for correctly identifying a story's author.
- 1 point for successfully fooling others into believing a story isn't yours.
The stakes are high, with the prize for tonight's winner being O'Reilly's JavaScript Pocket Reference, Third Edition—a nod to the show's blend of humor and geek culture ([06:46]).
Round 1: The Vile Horrendous
The first story, read at [08:14], involves a hilariously gross tale of excessive sweating leading to a rehydrated and crusty posterior, earning it the nickname "Vile Horrendous." The panelists launch into playful accusations and denials:
- Joe DeRosa initially claims, “I am the vile horrendous” ([14:15]), igniting laughter and skepticism.
- Matt McCusker counters, professing his ass is “extremely clean” ([09:10]), prompting Big Jay to consider him a sleeper contender.
- Shane Gillis expresses disbelief, stating, “Shane tried to bail on this five times today” ([04:39]), heightening the intrigue.
After a spirited debate filled with crude humor and ribbing, Joe DeRosa emerges as the rightful author of the story, solidifying his presence with, “This has nothing to do with Heat” ([17:03]).
Round 2: Spicy Pizza Prank
Next, Alex presents a story about sneaking insanely spicy hot sauce under a slice of pizza and sharing it with unsuspecting roommates ([19:45]). This tale sets the stage for further humorous exchanges:
- Shane Gillis quickly suspects Joe, suggesting, “I think it's Matt, but I'm gonna go with my original instinct, which is always right. Joe DeRosa” ([12:33]).
- Matt McCusker defends himself by downplaying his prankster tendencies, saying, “I'm not a huge prank prankster” ([22:22]).
- Luis J. Gomez playfully accuses Matt of trying to manipulate the votes to his advantage ([12:32]).
Ultimately, Matt McCusker admits to orchestrating the prank, sharing the story in detail: “We just laughed” ([25:35]), securing his position in the game.
Round 3: Oceanic Oddities
The third story involves a beach adventure in Florida where the storyteller encounters police crime scene tape tangled around their leg ([26:28]). The panelists’ guesses reflect their unique perspectives:
- Shane Gillis sarcastically claims the story as his own, “I think that this is Big J or DeRosa” ([06:20]).
- Luis J. Gomez zeroes in on Joe’s past antics, suspecting him once more due to his known penchant for gross jokes ([12:45]).
- Big Jay Oakerson remains skeptical, “I feel like that's true. You'd be playing on Matt's behalf right now” ([12:32]).
In a twist, Big Jay Oakerson claims the story, revealing his dislike for the ocean with, “I hate the ocean” ([32:45]). However, Alex confirms the story belongs to Shane Gillis ([31:39]), leading to a brief moment of chaos and laughter as Shane exclaims, “That was me!” ([37:24]).
Round 4: Jamaican Jumbles
The fourth story describes a tumultuous trip to Jamaica involving an argument over the age of Brian Laundrie ([34:30]). The narrative complexity increases as panelists attempt to link personal anecdotes:
- Louis J. Gomez narrates, “We had the nicest time” ([38:15]), painting a vivid picture of a romantic yet conflict-ridden vacation.
- Shane Gillis accuses himself of crafting the story to align with past podcast discussions about Jamaican resorts ([36:43]).
- Matt McCusker initially declines involvement but is eventually revealed as the true author.
After a series of rapid-fire accusations and defenses, Alex declares the story belongs to Shane Gillis ([84:38]), allowing Louis J. Gomez to share his own expanded and more detailed version, solidifying his role as a master storyteller.
Round 5: Microwaved Mayhem
At [44:51], Alex reads a story about microwaving a turd in a cup and hiding it between computer towers, a grimy twist on pranking. The panelists' reactions are a mix of disgust and amusement:
- Joe DeRosa embraces the title “Vile Horrendous,” unapologetically claiming his love for gross humor ([45:21]).
- Shane Gillis critiques the story’s lack of personality, making it harder to guess correctly ([28:29]).
- Matt McCusker admits to the prank, recounting how he elevated a typical college dorm prank to epic proportions ([51:52]).
In a humorous turn, Matt reveals the practicalities behind the prank, earning him laughs and respect from his peers.
Rounds 6 & 7: High-Stakes Heat
The game intensifies with stories delving deeper into personal and exaggerated experiences:
- Story 6 involves a middle school fight where the storyteller takes the blame to protect a friend, blending humor with faux drama ([56:06]).
- Story 7 recounts the misadventure of eating the spiciest wings, leading to a numb penis—a story so outrageous it leaves guests in stitches ([67:22]).
Each round showcases the panelists' abilities to fabricate believable stories while maintaining the comedic undercurrent. Notable interactions include:
- Joe DeRosa’s unabashed declaration, “I love shit” ([45:21]), aligning with his “Vile Horrendous” persona.
- Shane Gillis accusing others of conspiring, “Matt and Shane are genuinely cheating” ([53:30]), adding layers of suspense and humor.
Round 8: Dominican Drama
The final story, about catching a cousin jerking off in a closet in the Dominican Republic, ramps up the absurdity and humor ([77:42]). The panelists engage in a flurry of accusations:
- Louis J. Gomez contends it's Louis, exclaiming, “I promise it's not me” ([67:40]).
- Shane Gillis accuses Matt of playing everyone, while Matt McCusker defends himself by detailing the prank's execution ([78:13]).
The climax arrives as Alex announces, “That was Matt McCuskel” ([84:38]), leading to an uproarious acceptance from Matt and playful ribbing from his peers.
Conclusion and Winner Announcement
After eight intense and laughter-filled rounds, the scores are tallied:
- Louis J. Gomez emerges victorious with a commanding 18 points ([87:30]), praised for his inventive storytelling and quick deductions.
- Shane Gillis follows with 11 points, demonstrating sharp intuition and humorous commentary.
- Matt McCusker earns 12 points, recognized for his creative pranks and engaging narratives.
- Joe DeRosa and Big Jay Okerson conclude the game tied with 10 points each, respectively, showcasing their unique comedic styles and enduring camaraderie.
Memorable Highlights and Quotes
Throughout the episode, several standout moments underscore the show's comedic brilliance:
- Shane Gillis: “I'm very excited about tonight's show. We have a fucking star studded lineup. This is it.” ([02:20])
- Joe DeRosa: “I am the vile horrendous.” ([14:15])
- Big Jay Oakerson: “I hate the ocean.” ([32:45])
- Luis J. Gomez: “The vile horrendous strikes again.” ([46:22])
- Matt McCusker: “We just laughed.” ([25:35])
These interactions not only highlight the panelists' quick wit but also their chemistry, enhancing the overall entertainment value of Story Warz.
Closing Remarks
As the episode wraps up, Big Jay and Luis congratulate all participants, especially Louis J. Gomez, for his impressive win. The hosts encourage listeners to tune in for future episodes, promising more laughs, engaging stories, and the ever-present competitive spirit that defines Story Warz. The combination of personal anecdotes, playful deception, and unapologetic humor ensures that Episode 035 remains a memorable installment in the series.
